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1
00:00:03,046 --> 00:00:04,308
[ Thinking ] Out there,
2
00:00:04,352 --> 00:00:05,764
while people gossip
or take 10-minute breaks,
3
00:00:05,788 --> 00:00:07,137
I remain at the ready.
4
00:00:07,181 --> 00:00:09,531
Nothing can happen
that I haven't anticipated.
5
00:00:09,574 --> 00:00:13,317
I am the gatekeeper,
the keeper of secrets,
6
00:00:13,361 --> 00:00:16,059
for I am Birdgirl's assistant.
7
00:00:16,103 --> 00:00:18,670
- Gillian!
- And Judy's.
8
00:00:18,714 --> 00:00:21,021
My veggie gumbo
has tomatoes again.
9
00:00:21,064 --> 00:00:22,500
On it, boss.
10
00:00:22,544 --> 00:00:24,850
[ Thinking ]
I was made for this.
11
00:00:24,894 --> 00:00:26,437
Oh, my God, oh, my God,
oh, my God, oh, my God.
12
00:00:26,461 --> 00:00:29,420
♪ Who's the girl
that saves the world? ♪
13
00:00:29,464 --> 00:00:30,334
♪ Hey!
14
00:00:30,378 --> 00:00:33,033
[ Imitates fanfare ] Birdgirl!
15
00:00:35,557 --> 00:00:37,689
Still half a million short.
Damn.
16
00:00:37,733 --> 00:00:40,692
Maybe if we sell
-the Northfield plant. -We already did.
17
00:00:40,736 --> 00:00:42,912
I thought
-we sold Southfield. -We did.
18
00:00:42,955 --> 00:00:45,306
- Eastfield?
- No one would buy Eastfield.
19
00:00:45,349 --> 00:00:46,959
It's in the middle of nowhere.
20
00:00:47,003 --> 00:00:48,526
Plus, it smells like beans.
21
00:00:48,570 --> 00:00:50,137
[ Cellphone dialing ]
Yuri: Hello?
22
00:00:50,180 --> 00:00:51,442
Yuri, Charlie.
23
00:00:51,486 --> 00:00:53,531
I have a property
so deep in Assburg,
24
00:00:53,575 --> 00:00:55,185
it's not on the map. I'll take it.
25
00:00:55,229 --> 00:00:56,708
He wants East Assburg.
26
00:00:56,752 --> 00:00:59,450
I won't take
a penny less than ...e you nuts?
27
00:00:59,494 --> 00:01:02,018
We got a live one here.
Don't blow it.
28
00:01:02,062 --> 00:01:03,648
[ Whispering indistinctly
] We've got a deal.
29
00:01:03,672 --> 00:01:05,369
- We've got a deal.
- Lock it up.
30
00:01:05,413 --> 00:01:07,893
Someone must have made a sale,
'cause I just piddled.
31
00:01:07,937 --> 00:01:09,982
[ Chuckles ]
Not really.
32
00:01:10,026 --> 00:01:12,985
Oh!
Still 12 bucks short.
33
00:01:13,029 --> 00:01:15,640
[ Can opener whirring ]
34
00:01:18,948 --> 00:01:20,254
[ Whirring stops ]
35
00:01:20,297 --> 00:01:23,344
[ Whirring resumes ]
36
00:01:23,387 --> 00:01:25,085
Whoa-ho, whoa, whoa, whoa.
37
00:01:25,128 --> 00:01:26,651
She eats on the company dime?
38
00:01:26,695 --> 00:01:28,305
- He does.
- Huh.
39
00:01:28,349 --> 00:01:30,133
I thought all cats were girls.
40
00:01:30,177 --> 00:01:32,570
Anyway, there's your 12 bucks,
right there.
41
00:01:32,614 --> 00:01:35,660
And, uh, you could afford
to miss a couple of meals.
42
00:01:35,704 --> 00:01:37,401
[ Meowing angrily ]
43
00:01:37,445 --> 00:01:39,751
Aaah!
Get her off me!
44
00:01:39,795 --> 00:01:42,406
Sir, Peter Pants contributes
in ways you don't know,
45
00:01:42,450 --> 00:01:46,149
but, fine, we'll switch him
to... dry food.
46
00:01:46,193 --> 00:01:49,935
- Carry the 2, and...
- blammo... we hit zero. - Thank God.
47
00:01:49,979 --> 00:01:52,590
Maybe this will stop all the
employee rumors about layoffs.
48
00:01:52,634 --> 00:01:54,568
There have been rumors
about layoffs?[ Clears throat ]
49
00:01:54,592 --> 00:01:58,074
The shifting of resources
may mean staff changes.
50
00:01:58,118 --> 00:02:00,076
In fact, I'm sure of it.
51
00:02:00,120 --> 00:02:03,906
Why didn't someone tell me
"staff changes" means "layoffs"?
52
00:02:03,949 --> 00:02:07,170
I'm the good CEO.
I can't lay people off.
53
00:02:07,214 --> 00:02:08,954
And you won't have to,
as long as you stick
54
00:02:08,998 --> 00:02:12,001
to this ass-clenchingly
precarious balance sheet.
55
00:02:12,044 --> 00:02:15,918
Speaking of ass-clenching,
anyone headed outside?
56
00:02:15,961 --> 00:02:17,180
[ Leash rattles ]
57
00:02:17,224 --> 00:02:19,356
- Well, that went well.
- You did great.
58
00:02:19,400 --> 00:02:21,793
You're actually kind of
growing into this.
59
00:02:21,837 --> 00:02:23,099
I kind of am.
60
00:02:23,143 --> 00:02:24,535
Gillian!
I'm running late.
61
00:02:24,579 --> 00:02:26,209
I'm just gonna Birdgirl
straight from here.
62
00:02:26,233 --> 00:02:27,625
Fresh from the cleaner's!
63
00:02:27,669 --> 00:02:29,627
Did you... Reinforce the pits
and tits?
64
00:02:29,671 --> 00:02:30,976
Of course.
65
00:02:31,020 --> 00:02:32,978
Hey, anybody want to grab
a drink?
66
00:02:33,022 --> 00:02:34,458
[ Gasps ][ Door buzzes ]
67
00:02:34,502 --> 00:02:35,783
That was close. Did he see it?
Did he see the suit?
68
00:02:35,807 --> 00:02:37,220
Did he see it, you guys?
Did he see it?
69
00:02:37,244 --> 00:02:38,723
Hold it up like you were.
70
00:02:38,767 --> 00:02:41,204
Okay, this is very important.
71
00:02:41,248 --> 00:02:43,293
No one can see the suit,
72
00:02:43,337 --> 00:02:46,296
because then they'll know
that Judy is also...
73
00:02:46,340 --> 00:02:48,820
Wait, I almost said it.
74
00:02:48,864 --> 00:02:50,909
[ Whispering ]
Does Meredith know?
75
00:02:50,953 --> 00:02:52,215
Do I know what?
76
00:02:52,259 --> 00:02:53,477
Don't be mean.
77
00:02:53,521 --> 00:02:56,654
Yes, I know, along with
everything else,
78
00:02:56,698 --> 00:03:00,528
because I'm in your mind.
79
00:03:01,268 --> 00:03:03,618
Gillian, it's kind of
a low-key secret.
80
00:03:03,661 --> 00:03:05,228
It's okay for people
really close to me
81
00:03:05,272 --> 00:03:06,664
to know about Birdgirl,
82
00:03:06,708 --> 00:03:09,058
but I don't want everybody
knowing about it.
83
00:03:09,101 --> 00:03:10,799
Judy, if even just one person
84
00:03:10,842 --> 00:03:12,322
knows about
your secret identity,
85
00:03:12,366 --> 00:03:13,497
then they tell three more,
86
00:03:13,541 --> 00:03:14,933
then those three become nine,
87
00:03:14,977 --> 00:03:16,674
then they tell three,
and it's three cubed.
88
00:03:16,718 --> 00:03:18,328
You see where
I'm going with this?
89
00:03:18,372 --> 00:03:20,765
Then, someone falsely claims
Birdgirl injures them
90
00:03:20,809 --> 00:03:25,553
and sues Judy Ken Sebben
for all of Sebben & Sebben.
91
00:03:25,596 --> 00:03:27,859
Gillian, I appreciate it.
[ Grunts ]
92
00:03:27,903 --> 00:03:29,968
But there are already a ton
of pictures on the Internet
93
00:03:29,992 --> 00:03:31,994
comparing me and Birdgirl.
94
00:03:32,037 --> 00:03:34,562
Ooh, pits then tits.
95
00:03:34,605 --> 00:03:37,260
Wah-wah.
Much better.
96
00:03:37,304 --> 00:03:40,350
Three, two, one.
97
00:03:40,394 --> 00:03:41,786
Birdgirl!
98
00:03:44,311 --> 00:03:46,400
Tell no one
of what you've seen here.
99
00:03:46,443 --> 00:03:48,750
I will tell no one of that.
100
00:03:48,793 --> 00:03:51,361
I protect Judy's
secret identity,
101
00:03:51,405 --> 00:03:54,277
not for her sake but for ours.
102
00:03:54,321 --> 00:03:56,061
Well, a little bit for hers.
103
00:03:56,105 --> 00:03:58,238
She's so boss.
104
00:03:59,413 --> 00:04:00,457
[ Light switch clicks ]
105
00:04:00,501 --> 00:04:02,764
Let's get you home.
106
00:04:07,421 --> 00:04:10,293
[ Men chuckling ][ Grunting ]
107
00:04:10,337 --> 00:04:12,817
[ Humming ][ Dye pack beeping ]
108
00:04:12,861 --> 00:04:14,297
Hmm?
109
00:04:14,341 --> 00:04:17,039
[ Gasps ]
That was unexpected.
110
00:04:17,692 --> 00:04:20,521
[ Light switch clicks ]
111
00:04:22,087 --> 00:04:23,654
Man: Energy.
112
00:04:30,444 --> 00:04:32,750
"No, not same!"
113
00:04:32,794 --> 00:04:33,969
Nuh-unh.
114
00:04:35,362 --> 00:04:36,600
Birdgirl:
Coming in for landing.
115
00:04:36,624 --> 00:04:39,583
I'll be there in three, two...
116
00:04:39,627 --> 00:04:41,585
Birdgirl![ Meows ]
117
00:04:41,629 --> 00:04:44,458
Gillian, did you get
the cost-saving
118
00:04:44,501 --> 00:04:46,721
but still-delicious cat food?
119
00:04:46,764 --> 00:04:47,852
Of course.
120
00:04:47,896 --> 00:04:49,593
After he eats,
can you play with him?
121
00:04:49,637 --> 00:04:51,465
I got a cat so he could play
with himself,
122
00:04:51,508 --> 00:04:53,336
but he doesn't,
because he's a cat.
123
00:04:53,380 --> 00:04:55,991
[ Singing indistinctly ]
124
00:04:58,472 --> 00:05:01,431
[ Purrs ]
125
00:05:01,475 --> 00:05:02,780
Okay, great day today, Gillian.
126
00:05:02,824 --> 00:05:04,304
You can go home now
and get some rest.
127
00:05:04,347 --> 00:05:05,522
I am so amped.
128
00:05:05,566 --> 00:05:07,524
I'm never gonna get to sleep
tonight.
129
00:05:07,568 --> 00:05:10,788
[ Guitar plays softly ][ Yawning ] Make
sure I sign those contracts tomorrow
130
00:05:10,832 --> 00:05:14,836
and find something
to remove blue dye...
131
00:05:14,879 --> 00:05:17,012
from... skin.
132
00:05:19,362 --> 00:05:22,147
[ Light switch clicks ]
133
00:05:22,191 --> 00:05:24,715
[ Music fades ]
134
00:05:24,759 --> 00:05:27,370
[ Meows ]
135
00:05:36,248 --> 00:05:38,381
♪ When I'm alone
136
00:05:38,425 --> 00:05:41,993
♪ And I've got no one
to dry my tears ♪
137
00:05:42,037 --> 00:05:45,997
♪ I hear a voice
crying out ♪
138
00:05:46,041 --> 00:05:47,738
♪ In my...
139
00:05:47,782 --> 00:05:49,653
Carl!
I can't take this anymore.
140
00:05:49,697 --> 00:05:51,307
None of us can take it.
141
00:05:51,351 --> 00:05:52,656
Eileen, I'm a grown man, okay?!
142
00:05:52,700 --> 00:05:55,006
I've been out looking for a job,
and now I'm home.
143
00:05:55,050 --> 00:05:57,008
I just want to spread my legs
and relax!
144
00:05:57,052 --> 00:05:58,183
You're drunk, Dad.
145
00:05:58,227 --> 00:05:59,707
You're both drunk.
146
00:05:59,750 --> 00:06:02,492
Where'd this Goddamn cat
come from?!
147
00:06:02,536 --> 00:06:05,016
Cassie, how many times
do I have to tell you
148
00:06:05,060 --> 00:06:07,845
to close the screen door
when you come in?
149
00:06:07,889 --> 00:06:11,153
- Dad, you're drunk.
- That door was shut. - Dad, you're drunk.
150
00:06:11,196 --> 00:06:14,243
You know Cassie always shuts
that door when she gets home.
151
00:06:14,286 --> 00:06:16,376
You're just too drunk to notice.
152
00:06:18,334 --> 00:06:19,509
[ Glass shatters ]
153
00:06:19,553 --> 00:06:20,684
My God.
154
00:06:20,728 --> 00:06:23,948
That Goddamn cat's right.
155
00:06:23,992 --> 00:06:25,515
I'm a drunk.
156
00:06:25,559 --> 00:06:28,039
I need to dry out
and get my family back.
157
00:06:28,083 --> 00:06:29,476
We're right here, Dad.
158
00:06:29,519 --> 00:06:31,869
Cassie: We've always
been here, Dad.
159
00:06:31,913 --> 00:06:36,178
[ Gasps ] Risking country
music star Caleb Lee Hutchinson?
160
00:06:36,221 --> 00:06:40,574
We'll always be here, Cassie,
right here, no matter what.
161
00:06:40,617 --> 00:06:42,314
[ Smoke detector beeping ]
162
00:06:42,358 --> 00:06:44,621
♪ Unlock the door ♪ And set it free
163
00:06:44,665 --> 00:06:46,101
♪ Unlock the door ♪ And let it be
164
00:06:46,144 --> 00:06:47,407
[ Screaming ]
165
00:06:47,450 --> 00:06:49,017
[ Elevator bell dings ]
Dee-dee-doo.
166
00:06:49,060 --> 00:06:50,801
Morning, all.
Good morning.
167
00:06:50,845 --> 00:06:53,369
Good morn... Oh!
Oh, my God!
168
00:06:53,413 --> 00:06:55,110
Floris is dead!
169
00:06:55,153 --> 00:06:56,285
- What?
- What?
170
00:06:56,328 --> 00:06:58,940
[ Indistinct conversations ]
171
00:07:01,508 --> 00:07:03,248
No? Just resting?
172
00:07:03,292 --> 00:07:05,120
Thank goodness.
[ Yawns ]
173
00:07:05,163 --> 00:07:09,254
Floris, refill that carafe,
you lazy bag.
174
00:07:09,298 --> 00:07:11,909
Energy.
175
00:07:11,953 --> 00:07:13,737
[ Elevator bell dings ][ Clears throat ]
176
00:07:13,781 --> 00:07:15,173
Good morning, Judy.
177
00:07:15,217 --> 00:07:18,742
I haven't seen you
since 6:00 P.M. last night,
178
00:07:18,786 --> 00:07:20,222
when we both left work.
179
00:07:20,265 --> 00:07:22,180
Your dress is smoking.
180
00:07:22,224 --> 00:07:24,661
[ Gasps ]
181
00:07:24,705 --> 00:07:26,509
- We have to fire Gillian.
- We can't fire Gillian.
182
00:07:26,533 --> 00:07:29,231
Remember that ass-clenchingly
precarious balance sheet?
183
00:07:29,274 --> 00:07:32,408
Her ridiculous number of O.T.
hours has put us in the red.
184
00:07:32,452 --> 00:07:34,497
[ Singsong voice ]
I need those ridiculous hours.
185
00:07:34,541 --> 00:07:36,586
My life will fall apart.
186
00:07:36,630 --> 00:07:38,501
- We've got no choice.
- Unless we...
187
00:07:38,545 --> 00:07:41,765
Put her in a coma... hire another assistant
to split her workload.
188
00:07:41,809 --> 00:07:43,134
[ Normal voice ]
Probably what Mer said.
189
00:07:43,158 --> 00:07:45,377
A new employee is actually
cheaper than overtime.
190
00:07:45,421 --> 00:07:48,511
Okay, great, now Birdgirl gets
an all-night assistant.
191
00:07:48,555 --> 00:07:50,121
No more boring sleep.
192
00:07:50,165 --> 00:07:52,646
- I'll get Gillian.
- Crudité time.
193
00:07:52,689 --> 00:07:53,908
Gillian, take a seat.
194
00:07:53,951 --> 00:07:56,040
Did I do something wrong?
195
00:07:56,084 --> 00:07:58,434
No, you did everything right.
196
00:07:58,478 --> 00:07:59,609
You're working too much.
197
00:07:59,653 --> 00:08:01,306
I'm working
just the right amount
198
00:08:01,350 --> 00:08:02,545
of all the time, all the time.
199
00:08:02,569 --> 00:08:04,919
Gillian, we were wondering,
you know,
200
00:08:04,962 --> 00:08:09,314
would it be so bad
if we hired a night assistant?
201
00:08:09,358 --> 00:08:12,100
You take normal business hours,
6:00 A.M. to 6:00 P.M.,
202
00:08:12,143 --> 00:08:14,624
and someone else... Okay, perfect.
203
00:08:14,668 --> 00:08:15,973
That went easier than I thought.
204
00:08:16,017 --> 00:08:18,062
I'll start the hiring process
straightaway.
205
00:08:18,106 --> 00:08:19,803
I already know who I'll hire.
206
00:08:19,847 --> 00:08:22,197
[ Inhales deeply,
exhales sharply ]
207
00:08:22,240 --> 00:08:25,243
We need someone with tight lips
and a tighter ass...
208
00:08:25,287 --> 00:08:26,418
not literally.
209
00:08:26,462 --> 00:08:27,782
Just someone
who can keep a secret
210
00:08:27,811 --> 00:08:29,509
and takes it deadly serious.
211
00:08:29,552 --> 00:08:30,771
Gillian said "ass."
212
00:08:30,814 --> 00:08:33,730
I'll find the one person
who can do this job.
213
00:08:37,560 --> 00:08:38,779
Mm.
214
00:08:39,823 --> 00:08:41,085
- Gillian!
- Gillian!
215
00:08:41,129 --> 00:08:44,001
Loose lips.
Can't keep his mouth shut.
216
00:08:44,045 --> 00:08:47,527
None of these people
are good enough for Judy.
217
00:08:47,570 --> 00:08:48,528
Bingo.
218
00:08:48,571 --> 00:08:50,442
Gillian.
Hi.
219
00:08:50,486 --> 00:08:51,966
Ugh.
Hi, Benjy.
220
00:08:52,009 --> 00:08:55,839
Rumor has it, the boss is
looking for some night help.
221
00:08:55,883 --> 00:09:00,496
FYI... the best version of me
comes out at night.
222
00:09:01,279 --> 00:09:04,456
Everyone knows that's just
stacked pubic hair, Benjy.
223
00:09:04,500 --> 00:09:07,155
Besides, you're too late,
as "ushe."
224
00:09:07,198 --> 00:09:09,200
I've already found
the perfect match.
225
00:09:09,244 --> 00:09:10,419
Oh, yeah? Who?
226
00:09:10,462 --> 00:09:12,552
None of your beeswax,
"Pube-jy."
227
00:09:12,595 --> 00:09:15,032
Okay, okay, good burn.
228
00:09:15,076 --> 00:09:18,949
Welp, when you realize you're
desperate for the Benjy Effect,
229
00:09:18,993 --> 00:09:20,603
you know where to find me.
230
00:09:20,647 --> 00:09:23,911
Nowhere near Birdgirl.
That's where.
231
00:09:23,954 --> 00:09:26,566
Interestingly,
she's a little casual
232
00:09:26,609 --> 00:09:27,871
about her secret identity,
233
00:09:27,915 --> 00:09:30,395
which means we have to be
super serious about it.
234
00:09:30,439 --> 00:09:31,571
Got it?
235
00:09:31,614 --> 00:09:32,920
[ British accent ]
Got it.
236
00:09:35,096 --> 00:09:37,751
[ Grunts ] Hyah![ Normal voice ]
Oh, my...
237
00:09:37,794 --> 00:09:40,841
Nose in the carpet,
hands above the top bun.[ British accent ] Oh, hello.
238
00:09:40,884 --> 00:09:43,278
I'm Gennifer,
your new night assistant.
239
00:09:43,321 --> 00:09:44,888
Oh, so, so sorry!
240
00:09:44,932 --> 00:09:46,673
She told me
you'd be starting tonight.
241
00:09:46,716 --> 00:09:48,128
I'm shocked
she actually hired someone.
242
00:09:48,152 --> 00:09:49,632
She's, like, totally freaked out
243
00:09:49,676 --> 00:09:51,349
about people learning
my not-secret identity.
244
00:09:51,373 --> 00:09:53,680
[ Laughs ]
245
00:09:53,723 --> 00:09:55,943
Oh, that Gillian.
[ Chuckles ]
246
00:09:55,986 --> 00:09:57,509
Stop.
247
00:09:57,553 --> 00:10:01,557
Hmmmmmmm.
248
00:10:01,601 --> 00:10:02,776
Show time.
249
00:10:02,819 --> 00:10:04,188
[ Normal voice ]
Nice job, Gennifer.
250
00:10:04,212 --> 00:10:05,692
[ British accent ]
You, too, Gillian.
251
00:10:05,735 --> 00:10:07,104
[ Normal voice ]
You're almost as good as me.
252
00:10:07,128 --> 00:10:09,652
- Nobody's that good.
- Oh, one thing.
253
00:10:09,696 --> 00:10:11,785
Never give Birdgirl
a freshly sharpened knife,
254
00:10:11,828 --> 00:10:13,438
because she stores them
in her pants.
255
00:10:13,482 --> 00:10:14,788
Oh, I know.
How?
256
00:10:14,831 --> 00:10:17,312
Because I'm you.
257
00:10:17,355 --> 00:10:19,183
You're kind of crazy.
258
00:10:19,227 --> 00:10:21,098
And I quite like it.
259
00:10:26,321 --> 00:10:27,888
[ Yawns ] Energy.
260
00:10:27,931 --> 00:10:32,414
Another day guarding the secret
comes to a successful end.
261
00:10:32,457 --> 00:10:34,634
[ Alarm clock ringing
]♪ I will paint a picture
262
00:10:34,677 --> 00:10:36,853
Just as another begins.
263
00:10:36,897 --> 00:10:39,029
The sun rises because of me,
264
00:10:39,073 --> 00:10:40,552
though I'm not the sun.
265
00:10:40,596 --> 00:10:42,119
That's, like, Elizabethan for,
266
00:10:42,163 --> 00:10:43,860
"What have you done
for me lately?"
267
00:10:43,904 --> 00:10:47,690
♪ When I jump inside
and walk on... ♪
268
00:10:47,734 --> 00:10:51,433
What the [bleep] have you done?
269
00:10:51,476 --> 00:10:53,217
That's totally normal.
270
00:10:53,261 --> 00:10:55,176
Okay, so tonight is your speech
271
00:10:55,219 --> 00:10:57,482
at the Harley-Davidson Hogs
For a Female Cause.
272
00:10:57,526 --> 00:10:58,788
And Friday, you have
273
00:10:58,832 --> 00:11:00,374
the Women in Business
Male Empowerment Seminar,
274
00:11:00,398 --> 00:11:03,010
a networking event for
businesswomen, run by men.
275
00:11:03,053 --> 00:11:05,142
Got it. Let's write
the keynote for tonight.
276
00:11:05,186 --> 00:11:06,970
Maybe we start with
some motorcycle slang.
277
00:11:07,014 --> 00:11:08,493
"Good evening, riders.
278
00:11:08,537 --> 00:11:10,887
I hope you're all keeping
the rubber side down."
279
00:11:13,760 --> 00:11:14,804
Cutting. Right.
280
00:11:14,848 --> 00:11:17,285
The latest numbers are in.
281
00:11:17,328 --> 00:11:18,765
Productivity is way down.
282
00:11:18,808 --> 00:11:20,220
People are spending
all their work hours
283
00:11:20,244 --> 00:11:22,333
droning on
about the not-layoffs.
284
00:11:22,377 --> 00:11:26,076
So, by worrying about layoffs,
employee productivity is down,
285
00:11:26,120 --> 00:11:29,340
which will lead
-to massive layoffs. -I'll take notes.
286
00:11:29,384 --> 00:11:32,213
Thanks for saying that...
out loud.
287
00:11:32,256 --> 00:11:34,998
I say, if they can't stop
talking about layoffs,
288
00:11:35,042 --> 00:11:37,218
- do some layoffs.
- No, we have to find some way
289
00:11:37,261 --> 00:11:38,785
to get a positive message
out there.
290
00:11:38,828 --> 00:11:41,701
- Bwee-oop?
- No. No cheating.
291
00:11:41,744 --> 00:11:42,895
Just a snap of these fingers,
292
00:11:42,919 --> 00:11:44,704
and everyone forgets
about layoffs...
293
00:11:44,747 --> 00:11:46,096
and a few of them, their names.
294
00:11:46,140 --> 00:11:47,707
No, we're gonna do this
the right way.
295
00:11:47,750 --> 00:11:50,535
I'll go to these functions
and deliver an upbeat view
296
00:11:50,579 --> 00:11:51,667
of Sebben & Sebben.
297
00:11:51,711 --> 00:11:53,031
Meredith,
you do a listening tour.
298
00:11:53,060 --> 00:11:54,583
Make the employees talk so much,
299
00:11:54,626 --> 00:11:57,542
they forget what they're afraid
of, but no "bwee-oop."
300
00:11:57,586 --> 00:11:58,630
I promise.
301
00:11:58,674 --> 00:11:59,994
Gillian,
I forgot to tell Gennifer
302
00:12:00,023 --> 00:12:01,392
I'm gonna need her
at the event tonight,
303
00:12:01,416 --> 00:12:04,201
and you, both of you...
there... tonight...
304
00:12:04,245 --> 00:12:05,942
at the same time.
Can you let her know?
305
00:12:05,986 --> 00:12:08,510
Uh, both of us?
There, tonight?
306
00:12:08,553 --> 00:12:09,879
I'll do some Birdgirl-ing,
go to the event,
307
00:12:09,903 --> 00:12:11,295
then get back to Birdgirl-ing.
308
00:12:11,339 --> 00:12:12,882
It's a Birdgirl sandwich
with a hog-meat center.
309
00:12:12,906 --> 00:12:14,690
Speaking of hog meat,
where is Birdcat?
310
00:12:14,734 --> 00:12:15,735
Energy.[ Snorting ]
311
00:12:15,778 --> 00:12:17,214
I'll find him.
312
00:12:20,217 --> 00:12:23,177
I don't know, Trace,
they just put me on register,
313
00:12:23,220 --> 00:12:24,744
and I don't want to lose
this job.
314
00:12:24,787 --> 00:12:26,746
I'll pay it all back
on Thursday, babe.
315
00:12:26,789 --> 00:12:28,573
They won't even know.
316
00:12:28,617 --> 00:12:31,794
[ Purring ]
317
00:12:31,838 --> 00:12:34,405
My God, even a cat can see it.
318
00:12:34,449 --> 00:12:37,278
I don't need to sacrifice
my job for a man.
319
00:12:37,321 --> 00:12:39,236
Get your hands off me,
and get out.
320
00:12:39,280 --> 00:12:43,110
We are done and done,
and don't ever come back here.
321
00:12:43,893 --> 00:12:47,070
I don't know where or how
or why or how,
322
00:12:47,114 --> 00:12:48,811
but I'll get you, Cat.
323
00:12:48,855 --> 00:12:51,379
That cat's a freak.
324
00:12:51,422 --> 00:12:52,772
He's not a freak!
325
00:12:52,815 --> 00:12:54,208
He's an angel.
326
00:12:55,339 --> 00:12:57,298
♪ Unlock the door ♪ And set it free
327
00:12:57,341 --> 00:12:59,648
♪ Unlock the door ♪ And let it be
328
00:12:59,691 --> 00:13:01,911
So, let's go around the room,
329
00:13:01,955 --> 00:13:03,608
and you tell me
what's on your mind.
330
00:13:03,652 --> 00:13:06,568
Using the pads in front of you,
I want you to write down...
331
00:13:06,611 --> 00:13:07,830
[Bleep] journaling!
332
00:13:07,874 --> 00:13:08,918
Am I in trouble here?
333
00:13:08,962 --> 00:13:10,180
Is this about the layoffs?
334
00:13:10,224 --> 00:13:12,879
Like, 1 to 10,
what's my risk exposure?
335
00:13:12,922 --> 00:13:14,837
[Bleep] it!
We're all at risk!
336
00:13:14,881 --> 00:13:16,534
Look, either way, I'm covered.
337
00:13:16,578 --> 00:13:18,275
Protected class.
They can't fire me.
338
00:13:18,319 --> 00:13:20,123
It'd look like they discriminate
against majorities.
339
00:13:20,147 --> 00:13:23,280
And the majority of people would
have a big problem with that.
340
00:13:23,324 --> 00:13:24,562
They might rise up,
take the power
341
00:13:24,586 --> 00:13:26,588
they already have
into their own hands.
342
00:13:26,631 --> 00:13:27,807
[Bleep] it!
343
00:13:27,850 --> 00:13:29,983
Thanks for coming, everyone.
344
00:13:30,897 --> 00:13:33,595
And...
synchronize watches.
345
00:13:33,638 --> 00:13:35,162
The event starts at 8:00.
346
00:13:35,205 --> 00:13:37,947
Gennifer, you meet Birdgirl
at the southeastern entrance
347
00:13:37,991 --> 00:13:40,297
at exactly 19:56
with Judy's outfit.
348
00:13:40,341 --> 00:13:41,864
[ British accent ]
Got it.
349
00:13:41,908 --> 00:13:45,563
Birdgirl, you'll steal away
behind the chocolate abyss.
350
00:13:45,607 --> 00:13:46,826
Chocolate abyss?
351
00:13:46,869 --> 00:13:48,305
Oh, it's a bottomless
fondue pot,
352
00:13:48,349 --> 00:13:49,959
which will provide you
with ample cover
353
00:13:50,003 --> 00:13:52,048
to change into Judy's
evening gown.
354
00:13:52,092 --> 00:13:55,051
Then, you'll meet me, Gillian,
at the production booth,
355
00:13:55,095 --> 00:13:56,333
where I'll drop off
her head shot
356
00:13:56,357 --> 00:13:57,837
to be projected on the screen,
357
00:13:57,880 --> 00:13:59,708
and we'll get Judy ready
to go onstage.
358
00:13:59,751 --> 00:14:01,841
Got that, Gillian?
Roger.
359
00:14:03,146 --> 00:14:05,148
Le coq au vin, Gillian.
360
00:14:05,192 --> 00:14:07,020
Benjy?
What are you doing here?
361
00:14:07,063 --> 00:14:10,110
I never miss this event...
for obvious reasons.
362
00:14:10,153 --> 00:14:12,112
Benjy works at Sebben & Sebben.
363
00:14:12,155 --> 00:14:15,463
Miss Ken Sebben,
we're all pulling for you.
364
00:14:15,506 --> 00:14:19,336
[ Wristwatch beeping ]
Finally, a female CEO. It's time.
365
00:14:19,380 --> 00:14:21,556
Man: Introducing
your keynote speaker...
366
00:14:21,599 --> 00:14:24,994
- Speech, speech!
- ...CEO, and honorary hog...
367
00:14:25,038 --> 00:14:26,058
Speech, speech, speech, speech.
368
00:14:26,082 --> 00:14:28,563
...Judy Ken Sebben!
369
00:14:28,606 --> 00:14:31,000
[ Cheers and applause ]
370
00:14:31,044 --> 00:14:37,398
♪
371
00:14:37,441 --> 00:14:39,704
[ Engine revs, tires squeal ]
372
00:14:39,748 --> 00:14:45,536
♪
373
00:14:45,580 --> 00:14:46,929
[ Engine idling ]
374
00:14:46,973 --> 00:14:48,365
Hello, riders.
375
00:14:48,409 --> 00:14:50,715
I hope you're keeping
the rubber side down.
376
00:14:50,759 --> 00:14:52,369
[ Cheers and applause ]
377
00:14:52,413 --> 00:14:56,330
I just found out we raised
over $160 million
378
00:14:56,373 --> 00:14:57,766
for female causes tonight.
379
00:14:57,809 --> 00:15:00,508
Isn't that something?[
Cheers and applause ]
380
00:15:00,551 --> 00:15:03,032
Uh, $160,000.
381
00:15:03,076 --> 00:15:05,774
[ Audience groans ]
Sorry about that.
382
00:15:06,557 --> 00:15:10,387
[ Audience "ohhs" ]
We live in amazing times.
383
00:15:10,431 --> 00:15:11,867
In my company,
384
00:15:11,911 --> 00:15:15,958
old ladies are no longer
considered just back-warmers.
385
00:15:16,002 --> 00:15:17,873
[ Audience groans ]
386
00:15:17,917 --> 00:15:20,310
And when it comes
to my employees,
387
00:15:20,354 --> 00:15:25,707
uh, if they can't stop talking
about layoffs, do some layoffs.
388
00:15:25,750 --> 00:15:27,970
Sorry, uh, bit of a mix-up.
389
00:15:28,014 --> 00:15:29,711
Must be the fumes.
390
00:15:29,754 --> 00:15:32,583
[ Laughs ]
391
00:15:32,627 --> 00:15:37,937
Just so we're clear, there are
no massive layoffs going on.
392
00:15:37,980 --> 00:15:39,677
I'm gonna stop saying
the word "layoffs."
393
00:15:39,721 --> 00:15:43,072
This is the absolute last time
I say "layoffs."
394
00:15:43,116 --> 00:15:44,552
[ Grunts]
395
00:15:44,595 --> 00:15:46,435
You were so concerned
about my secret identity,
396
00:15:46,467 --> 00:15:48,208
we messed up the reason
we were here...
397
00:15:48,251 --> 00:15:50,601
to stop the rumors
about layoffs.
398
00:15:50,645 --> 00:15:53,256
- Not happy, Gillian.
- It's my fault.
399
00:15:53,300 --> 00:15:55,302
You do seem to be stretched
a little thin.
400
00:15:55,345 --> 00:15:57,043
What if somehow
we found the funds
401
00:15:57,086 --> 00:15:58,696
to hire a second assistant
to assist you?
402
00:15:58,740 --> 00:16:01,134
What about that weird kid
on the 27th floor?
403
00:16:01,177 --> 00:16:03,049
The pubic-lump guy?
404
00:16:03,092 --> 00:16:04,876
Yeah, he seems to be
an upper-level floater.
405
00:16:04,920 --> 00:16:08,576
Super perfect way
-to describe him. -Benjy can fill in
406
00:16:08,619 --> 00:16:10,665
Man: Energy... that Gillian and Gennifer
might miss.
407
00:16:10,708 --> 00:16:12,014
There are no gaps!
408
00:16:12,058 --> 00:16:13,973
I mean, okay, great.
409
00:16:14,016 --> 00:16:15,626
Benjy it is.
I'll tell him.
410
00:16:15,670 --> 00:16:18,107
I know where to find him.
We're friends.
411
00:16:18,151 --> 00:16:20,109
Even though I hate him.
412
00:16:20,153 --> 00:16:21,850
[ As Benjy ]
[ Clears throat ][ Gasps ]
413
00:16:21,893 --> 00:16:23,591
Your magnetic pen, ma'am?
414
00:16:23,634 --> 00:16:25,810
Benjy here, reporting for duty.
415
00:16:25,854 --> 00:16:27,943
I'm Benjy.
Yeah, that's me.
416
00:16:27,987 --> 00:16:31,991
Hmmmmm.
417
00:16:33,340 --> 00:16:34,689
Great!
Welcome to the team!
418
00:16:34,732 --> 00:16:37,039
[ Normal voice ]
Judy Ken Sebben's office.
419
00:16:37,083 --> 00:16:40,086
[ As Benjy ]
Judy Ken Sebben's office.
420
00:16:40,129 --> 00:16:41,957
[ British accent ]
I'm a tea drinker, Floris!
421
00:16:42,001 --> 00:16:44,699
You git!
422
00:16:44,742 --> 00:16:45,874
Benjy!
423
00:16:45,917 --> 00:16:47,049
Gillian!
424
00:16:47,093 --> 00:16:49,051
Gennifer![ Cellphone rings ]
425
00:16:49,095 --> 00:16:51,010
[ As Benjy ]
Judy Ken Sebben's office.
426
00:16:51,053 --> 00:16:53,664
[ Coughing ] Energy.
427
00:16:53,708 --> 00:16:55,666
[ Water running ]
428
00:16:55,710 --> 00:16:57,451
[ Normal voice ]
Benjy, you're so annoying.
429
00:16:57,494 --> 00:16:59,540
Aah!
Look at yourself.
430
00:16:59,583 --> 00:17:02,369
You need help.
You're going to die.
431
00:17:02,412 --> 00:17:05,154
Then I'm going to die,
and nobody's going to know
432
00:17:05,198 --> 00:17:07,200
until a corpse dog sniffs me out
433
00:17:07,243 --> 00:17:09,985
because you have no friends
and you're always at work.
434
00:17:10,029 --> 00:17:11,508
I have everything under control.
435
00:17:11,552 --> 00:17:14,033
I can't let you find out
that Judy is Birdgirl.
436
00:17:14,076 --> 00:17:16,165
I know she's Birdgirl.
437
00:17:16,209 --> 00:17:20,778
♪
438
00:17:20,822 --> 00:17:23,216
Energy.
439
00:17:26,132 --> 00:17:29,048
- Ahem.
- Did I do something wrong?
440
00:17:29,091 --> 00:17:32,964
Gillian, some things have been
falling through the cracks.
441
00:17:33,008 --> 00:17:34,531
And not just the one
on your face.
442
00:17:34,575 --> 00:17:37,273
I think it'd be best to get
the assistants together...
443
00:17:37,317 --> 00:17:39,362
on the same page.
444
00:17:39,406 --> 00:17:41,669
Uh, let me go get them.
445
00:17:41,712 --> 00:17:43,366
[ Chuckles ] Yeah.
446
00:17:43,410 --> 00:17:45,064
Whew.
447
00:17:45,107 --> 00:17:49,068
Energy.
448
00:17:49,981 --> 00:17:53,072
[ Glass shatters ]
449
00:17:56,249 --> 00:17:58,033
The gig is up, Gennifer.
450
00:17:58,077 --> 00:17:59,774
Or should I say Gillian?
451
00:17:59,817 --> 00:18:02,211
Gillian, you don't have to
do this anymore.
452
00:18:02,255 --> 00:18:04,126
[ British accent ] No!
I'm Gingerfer.
453
00:18:04,170 --> 00:18:06,128
I'm Gengillian.
454
00:18:06,172 --> 00:18:07,999
Gillian, stop.
You're making it worse.
455
00:18:08,043 --> 00:18:11,438
It is with great sadness,
uh, that we must force you
456
00:18:11,481 --> 00:18:14,571
to use your five months
of unused vacation time.
457
00:18:14,615 --> 00:18:15,833
[ Normal voice ]
Fired?!
458
00:18:15,877 --> 00:18:18,097
You're firing me?
459
00:18:18,140 --> 00:18:20,229
[ Laughs ]
Let's just put her in a coma.
460
00:18:20,273 --> 00:18:23,102
I'm the only one strong enough
to keep the secret.
461
00:18:23,145 --> 00:18:25,495
I'm the only one you can trust!
462
00:18:25,539 --> 00:18:31,458
I gave my everythi-i-i-ng!
463
00:18:31,501 --> 00:18:35,549
And now I'm fired!
[ Grunts ]
464
00:18:35,592 --> 00:18:38,334
[ British accent ]
You don't run from me, missy!
465
00:18:38,378 --> 00:18:39,616
[ Normal voice ]
No, you don't run...
466
00:18:39,640 --> 00:18:41,337
[ As Benjy ]
No, there is no Birdgirl.
467
00:18:41,381 --> 00:18:42,575
[ British accent ]
No, you shut up!
468
00:18:42,599 --> 00:18:44,601
There's no Birdgirl without me!
469
00:18:44,645 --> 00:18:46,473
[ Normal voice ] Or me!
[ As Benjy ] Or me!
470
00:18:46,516 --> 00:18:49,171
[ Normal voice ]
I'm the keeper of the secret!
471
00:18:49,215 --> 00:18:51,826
[ British accent ]
I'm Judy's assistant!
472
00:18:51,869 --> 00:18:58,180
[ Deep voice ]
I'm all Judy's assistants!
473
00:18:58,224 --> 00:19:00,704
Oh, my God.
474
00:19:02,706 --> 00:19:04,665
[ Grunts ]
475
00:19:04,708 --> 00:19:09,409
You can't see her change
into her costume!
476
00:19:10,279 --> 00:19:13,326
[ Grunts ]
477
00:19:15,676 --> 00:19:18,374
Carl, we're gonna lose
the house.
478
00:19:18,418 --> 00:19:19,723
Eileen, I'll get another job.
479
00:19:19,767 --> 00:19:22,248
[ Gasps ]
Maybe I'll get a job, too.
480
00:19:22,291 --> 00:19:24,250
God damn it, Eileen.
481
00:19:24,293 --> 00:19:25,642
Don't say that.
482
00:19:25,686 --> 00:19:27,992
[ Meows ]
How'd that cat get in here?
483
00:19:28,036 --> 00:19:30,212
Cassie![ China shatters ]
484
00:19:30,256 --> 00:19:32,301
40 pounds of dry-aged
Wagyu beef.
485
00:19:32,345 --> 00:19:34,303
The real missing
Dead See Scrolls.
486
00:19:34,347 --> 00:19:35,478
A Ferrari!
487
00:19:35,522 --> 00:19:37,437
The forgotten Klimt painting!
488
00:19:37,480 --> 00:19:39,134
We're gonna be okay.
489
00:19:39,178 --> 00:19:41,136
It's gonna be okay.
490
00:19:41,180 --> 00:19:42,746
[ Chuckles ]
491
00:19:42,790 --> 00:19:45,314
[ Lighter clinks ]
492
00:19:45,358 --> 00:19:48,056
The cat's lick.
It's...
493
00:19:48,099 --> 00:19:49,884
Pointing to Heaven.
494
00:19:49,927 --> 00:19:51,015
That's right.
495
00:19:51,059 --> 00:19:52,278
She's an angel cat.
496
00:19:52,321 --> 00:19:53,844
[ Smoke detector beeping ]
497
00:19:53,888 --> 00:19:55,672
♪ Unlock the door ♪ And set it free
498
00:19:55,716 --> 00:19:57,848
♪ Unlock the door ♪ And let it be
499
00:19:57,892 --> 00:20:01,200
♪ Unlock the door
and follow... ♪
500
00:20:01,243 --> 00:20:02,810
[ Screaming ]
501
00:20:02,853 --> 00:20:06,596
Oh, no, they're out of
that cute leopard print
502
00:20:06,640 --> 00:20:10,731
Gennifer wears seamlessly
from morning to evening.
503
00:20:13,299 --> 00:20:14,822
Hey!
504
00:20:14,865 --> 00:20:17,259
You shouldn't be out.
505
00:20:17,303 --> 00:20:19,696
Let's get you home.
506
00:20:19,740 --> 00:20:21,045
[ Cat meows ]
507
00:20:21,089 --> 00:20:22,612
Birdgirl: Whoa!
508
00:20:22,656 --> 00:20:26,529
Gillian!
509
00:20:28,183 --> 00:20:31,969
Oh, sorry.
I'll find your wet food.
510
00:20:32,013 --> 00:20:34,233
[ Thud ]
511
00:20:34,276 --> 00:20:36,104
Aw, Gillian.
512
00:20:36,147 --> 00:20:39,629
[ Grunting ]
513
00:20:40,717 --> 00:20:43,677
Gillian:
Must protect boss.
514
00:20:43,720 --> 00:20:45,940
[ Vomiting ]
515
00:20:45,983 --> 00:20:49,552
[ Humming ]
516
00:20:50,901 --> 00:20:54,078
We're so tired.
517
00:20:54,122 --> 00:20:56,733
[ Guitar plays softly ]
518
00:20:59,823 --> 00:21:00,781
Shh.
519
00:21:00,824 --> 00:21:02,391
[ Normal voice ]
What happened?
520
00:21:02,435 --> 00:21:04,524
Pretty sure we're gonna make
the news again.
521
00:21:04,567 --> 00:21:05,742
You can watch tomorrow.
522
00:21:05,786 --> 00:21:07,788
I was just trying
to protect you.
523
00:21:07,831 --> 00:21:10,269
Gillian, we're all
just regular people
524
00:21:10,312 --> 00:21:13,968
trying to do the best we can,
and you're better than best.
525
00:21:14,011 --> 00:21:15,709
You mean it?
526
00:21:17,101 --> 00:21:21,105
Yes, but you suck
at taking care of yourself.
527
00:21:21,149 --> 00:21:24,283
Rest, and tomorrow we can talk
about that vacation.
528
00:21:24,326 --> 00:21:26,937
Wow, that sounds nice.
529
00:21:26,981 --> 00:21:31,290
Whew. Boy, I can...
I can really smell that.
530
00:21:31,333 --> 00:21:32,465
Hoo!
531
00:21:32,508 --> 00:21:36,033
[ Siren wails in distance ]
532
00:21:37,513 --> 00:21:39,559
Birdgirl: Birdcat,
coming in for landing.
533
00:21:39,602 --> 00:21:41,996
I'll be there in three, two...
534
00:21:42,039 --> 00:21:45,478
[ Grunts ]
535
00:21:47,393 --> 00:21:49,482
Man: Relax.
536
00:21:51,353 --> 00:21:53,268
Half a mil in the black.
537
00:21:53,312 --> 00:21:55,705
When folks saw that
the stress of working for you
538
00:21:55,749 --> 00:21:57,968
turned your assistant
into a three-headed monster,
539
00:21:58,012 --> 00:22:00,971
some of them decided to pursue
other opportunities.
540
00:22:01,015 --> 00:22:02,625
A lot of people quit.
541
00:22:02,669 --> 00:22:05,976
Veggie gumbo, extra tomatoes.
542
00:22:06,020 --> 00:22:07,369
When is Gillian back?
543
00:22:07,413 --> 00:22:10,067
[ Sniffing ]
I hate that guy.
544
00:22:10,111 --> 00:22:12,505
♪ Hey, who's the girl
that saves the world? ♪
545
00:22:12,548 --> 00:22:13,897
♪ Birdgirl!
546
00:22:13,941 --> 00:22:15,508
♪ Wins a fight,
unique like pearls ♪
547
00:22:15,551 --> 00:22:16,900
♪ Birdgirl!
548
00:22:16,944 --> 00:22:18,554
♪ Who's the one
they can't defeat? ♪
549
00:22:18,598 --> 00:22:20,077
♪ Hey, Birdgirl!
550
00:22:20,121 --> 00:22:21,731
♪ Ultra fierce
and so unique ♪
551
00:22:21,775 --> 00:22:24,430
♪ Hey, Birdgirl!
552
00:22:24,473 --> 00:22:25,909
♪ Birdgirl!
553
00:22:25,953 --> 00:22:29,130
♪ Hey [ Imitates fanfare ]
554
00:22:29,173 --> 00:22:32,916
Made in Georgia.
555
00:22:32,966 --> 00:22:37,516
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