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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:14,482 --> 00:00:16,322 - NO, LET GO, LET GO, LET GO. - NO, NO, NO, NO, NO! 2 00:00:16,350 --> 00:00:17,520 AH! 3 00:00:17,551 --> 00:00:20,451 LAST ONE OUT OF BED. YOU HAVE TO MAKE IT. 4 00:00:20,488 --> 00:00:21,818 - THAT'S SUCH A DUMB RULE. 5 00:00:21,855 --> 00:00:24,325 - YOU'RE THE ONE THAT MADE IT UP. 6 00:00:24,358 --> 00:00:26,428 - YOU'RE RIGHT. I'M THE BOSS. 7 00:00:26,460 --> 00:00:28,460 OKAY. I'LL DO IT. 8 00:00:28,496 --> 00:00:29,626 - ALL RIGHT, AND DON'T LEAVE YOUR SOCKS IN THERE. 9 00:00:29,663 --> 00:00:32,473 THEY GIVE ME SNAKE DREAMS. 10 00:00:32,500 --> 00:00:33,670 - WHAT TIME'S YOUR BROTHER COMING TODAY? 11 00:00:33,701 --> 00:00:35,841 - HIS FLIGHT GETS IN AT NOON. 12 00:00:35,869 --> 00:00:37,439 HE'LL GET LOST AND THEN BLAME MY DIRECTIONS, 13 00:00:37,471 --> 00:00:39,841 SO FIGURE ABOUT 6:00. 14 00:00:39,873 --> 00:00:43,283 OR, NO, WAIT, MICHELLE'S COMING WITH HIM, SO 12:45. 15 00:00:50,218 --> 00:00:51,518 - MADE IT. 16 00:00:51,552 --> 00:00:54,362 - DO YOU HAVE TO DO EVERYTHING LYING DOWN? 17 00:00:54,388 --> 00:00:58,458 - OKAY, I DO THAT ONE THING STANDING UP AGAINST THE WALL. 18 00:01:01,262 --> 00:01:04,272 SO HOW WOULD YOU FEEL IF, WHEN THEY COME, 19 00:01:04,298 --> 00:01:07,538 I WASN'T HERE? - COME ON. 20 00:01:07,568 --> 00:01:09,298 THEY'RE ONLY GONNA BE HERE FOR A FEW HOURS. 21 00:01:09,337 --> 00:01:11,307 BESIDES, MICHELLE'S REALLY EXCITED TO SEE YOU. 22 00:01:11,339 --> 00:01:13,309 - MICHELLE'S REALLY EXCITED ABOUT EVERYTHING. 23 00:01:13,341 --> 00:01:16,311 SHE SMILED DURING HER ENTIRE CHILDBIRTH. 24 00:01:17,678 --> 00:01:18,648 - THAT'S WHAT STAYED WITH YOU 25 00:01:18,679 --> 00:01:21,349 AFTER WATCHING THAT VIDEO? 26 00:01:21,382 --> 00:01:25,292 THAT'S NOT A MIRACLE. THAT'S JUST GROSS. 27 00:01:25,319 --> 00:01:26,419 - IT'S REALLY MORE YOUR BROTHER. 28 00:01:26,454 --> 00:01:28,324 I JUST DON'T LIKE THE WAY THAT HE TALKS DOWN TO YOU. 29 00:01:28,356 --> 00:01:30,256 I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY YOU DON'T FIGHT BACK. 30 00:01:30,291 --> 00:01:31,861 - THAT'S JUST BRIAN BEING BRIAN, YOU KNOW. 31 00:01:31,892 --> 00:01:33,892 - OKAY, THAT IS NOT ANY EXCUSE. 32 00:01:33,927 --> 00:01:36,457 YOU FIGHT WITH ME ALL THE TIME. 33 00:01:36,497 --> 00:01:37,727 HOW COME BRIAN GETS TO BE BRIAN, 34 00:01:37,765 --> 00:01:41,235 BUT WHITNEY DOESN'T GET TO BE WHITNEY, ALEX? 35 00:01:41,269 --> 00:01:43,869 - I THINK WHITNEY KNOWS. 36 00:01:43,904 --> 00:01:45,144 ALL RIGHT, I'M GONNA GO TAKE A SHOWER. 37 00:01:45,173 --> 00:01:46,443 DO YOU MIND MAKING SOME COFFEE? 38 00:01:46,474 --> 00:01:48,614 - I JUST MADE THE BED. 39 00:01:48,642 --> 00:01:51,182 I'M EXHAUSTED. - [laughs] 40 00:01:51,212 --> 00:01:54,522 - WHITNEY IS TAPED IN FRONT OF A LIVE STUDIO AUDIENCE. 41 00:01:59,353 --> 00:02:03,263 - OH, YEAH, NICE DELI TRAY. 42 00:02:03,291 --> 00:02:04,431 - EW. 43 00:02:04,458 --> 00:02:06,928 OH. 44 00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:10,330 SO I WENT TO THE FOOD STORE, AND I GOT THE FANCY MEAT 45 00:02:10,364 --> 00:02:11,674 THAT WAS SLICED IN FRONT OF ME, 46 00:02:11,699 --> 00:02:13,769 CHEESE THAT'S NOT NEON, 47 00:02:13,801 --> 00:02:15,941 AND WHAT KIND OF BREAD, YOU ASK? 48 00:02:15,969 --> 00:02:20,269 DON'T KNOW, AND I DON'T CARE. 49 00:02:20,308 --> 00:02:21,778 - WOW, YOU REALLY WENT ALL OUT. - MM-HMM. 50 00:02:21,809 --> 00:02:23,179 AND I EVEN TOOK THE TRASH OUT, 51 00:02:23,211 --> 00:02:26,711 AND I THREW IT DOWN THE TRASH CHUTE. 52 00:02:26,747 --> 00:02:30,447 - WE DON'T HAVE A TRASH CHUTE. 53 00:02:30,484 --> 00:02:32,224 - STILL DON'T CARE. 54 00:02:32,253 --> 00:02:33,353 [knock at door] 55 00:02:33,387 --> 00:02:35,517 OH. 56 00:02:35,556 --> 00:02:37,256 - WHAT'S UP? - HEY. 57 00:02:37,291 --> 00:02:38,261 - HI. - HELLO. 58 00:02:38,292 --> 00:02:40,762 - HOW ARE YOU? - A DELI TRAY? 59 00:02:40,794 --> 00:02:42,904 ARE WE HAVING ROXANNE'S INTERVENTION? 60 00:02:42,930 --> 00:02:45,770 I DIDN'T FINISH WRITING MY LETTER. 61 00:02:45,799 --> 00:02:49,399 - THEY DON'T SERVE FOOD AT INTERVENTIONS. 62 00:02:49,437 --> 00:02:51,937 I HAVE HEARD. 63 00:02:51,972 --> 00:02:53,742 - NO, BRIAN AND MICHELLE ARE COMING IN FOR THE WEEKEND. 64 00:02:53,774 --> 00:02:54,714 - OH. 65 00:02:54,742 --> 00:02:56,312 - HEY, CAN WE BORROW YOUR CAR? - FOR WHAT? 66 00:02:56,344 --> 00:02:59,314 - WE ARE OBVIOUSLY GOING TO COSTCO. 67 00:02:59,347 --> 00:03:01,317 - YEAH, I SOLD A BANNER OUT OF MY BLOG, 68 00:03:01,349 --> 00:03:02,379 AND I HAVE SOME EXTRA CASH, 69 00:03:02,416 --> 00:03:06,316 SO I'M GONNA BUY A CELL PHONE THAT DOESN'T FLIP. 70 00:03:06,354 --> 00:03:08,324 - I JUST LIKE STANDING NEXT TO THE GIANT LAUNDRY DETERGENT 71 00:03:08,356 --> 00:03:10,886 AND THEN PRETENDING I'M REALLY SMALL. 72 00:03:10,924 --> 00:03:13,564 - AND I NEED PANTS. 73 00:03:13,594 --> 00:03:16,304 - YEAH, YOU-- YOU DO. 74 00:03:16,330 --> 00:03:17,270 - ALL RIGHT, GOOD, LET'S GO. 75 00:03:17,298 --> 00:03:20,398 I'D LIKE TO BE TINY BY 3:00. 76 00:03:20,434 --> 00:03:21,844 - BYE. 77 00:03:21,869 --> 00:03:24,639 - HEY, I ARRANGED THIS WHOLE SHOPPING TRIP 78 00:03:24,672 --> 00:03:26,342 TO GET MARK AND ROXANNE TOGETHER. 79 00:03:26,374 --> 00:03:30,314 IT'S GONNA BE THEIR FIRST DATE, BUT THEY DON'T KNOW IT. 80 00:03:30,344 --> 00:03:31,884 - OH. - AT A WAREHOUSE STORE? 81 00:03:31,912 --> 00:03:33,352 - YEAH. 82 00:03:33,381 --> 00:03:35,551 - WHY DON'T YOU JUST TAKE THEM... 83 00:03:35,583 --> 00:03:37,423 ANYWHERE ELSE? 84 00:03:37,451 --> 00:03:38,321 - OH, OH, OH, OH, OH! - HELLO. 85 00:03:38,352 --> 00:03:39,722 - OH, HI. - HI! 86 00:03:39,753 --> 00:03:41,393 OOH, I LOVE YOUR HAIR. 87 00:03:41,422 --> 00:03:43,362 - I LOVE YOUR JACKET. - I LOVE YOUR NAILS. 88 00:03:43,391 --> 00:03:46,631 - I LOVE YOUR BOOTS. - I'D LOVE A BEER. 89 00:03:46,660 --> 00:03:48,460 - BYE. LOVE YOU. HOW WAS YOUR FLIGHT? 90 00:03:48,496 --> 00:03:50,496 - OH, IT WAS FINE, EXCEPT BRIAN STARED DOWN 91 00:03:50,531 --> 00:03:53,631 A PERFECTLY NICE KUWAITI FAMILY ACROSS THE AISLE. 92 00:03:53,667 --> 00:03:56,467 - THEY WERE AWFULLY QUIET. 93 00:03:56,504 --> 00:03:58,744 - THEY WERE SLEEPING. 94 00:03:58,772 --> 00:04:01,282 - YOU'RE THE EXPERT. 95 00:04:01,309 --> 00:04:03,409 SO STILL NO BARBERS IN CHICAGO, HUH? 96 00:04:03,444 --> 00:04:05,384 [laughs] 97 00:04:05,413 --> 00:04:08,423 NO, NO, NO, NO, IT'S OKAY 'CAUSE YOU TWO 98 00:04:08,449 --> 00:04:11,419 ARE THE CUTEST LESBIAN COUPLE I KNOW. 99 00:04:13,454 --> 00:04:17,294 - OKAY, I'M NOT SURE IF THAT'S A SHOT AT US OR LESBIANS. 100 00:04:17,325 --> 00:04:18,355 - YOU WANT ME TO TAKE THAT BAG FOR YOU? 101 00:04:18,392 --> 00:04:20,532 - OH, NO, NO, NO, YOU GUYS SIT AND WATCH YOUR GAME 102 00:04:20,561 --> 00:04:22,461 WHILE WHITNEY AND I DO OUR THING IN THE KITCHEN. 103 00:04:22,496 --> 00:04:23,856 - ALL RIGHT, COOL. 104 00:04:23,897 --> 00:04:25,997 - OH, HEY, WHITNEY, 105 00:04:26,033 --> 00:04:27,673 THAT'S THE ROOM WITH THE POTS. 106 00:04:27,701 --> 00:04:30,371 [laughs] 107 00:04:33,441 --> 00:04:35,581 - I HOPE EVERYONE LIKES PULLED PORK SLIDERS 108 00:04:35,609 --> 00:04:37,849 WITH AN AIOLI SPREAD, SWEET POTATO FRIES, 109 00:04:37,878 --> 00:04:40,748 AND CHOCOLATE CAKE WITH HOMEMADE VANILLA ICE CREAM. 110 00:04:40,781 --> 00:04:43,521 - OH. 111 00:04:43,551 --> 00:04:46,391 I MADE SANDWICHES. 112 00:04:46,420 --> 00:04:48,820 - WE CAN EAT THE SANDWICHES TOMORROW. 113 00:04:48,856 --> 00:04:51,886 COME ON, IT'S PULLED PORK. I LOVE PULLED PORK. 114 00:04:54,762 --> 00:04:56,102 - GOOD, 'CAUSE YOU'RE GONNA HAVE 115 00:04:56,129 --> 00:04:59,569 PLENTY OF CHANCES TO PULL IT THIS WEEKEND. 116 00:05:03,136 --> 00:05:05,366 - OH, THEY REALLY JAMMED US IN HERE. 117 00:05:05,406 --> 00:05:06,366 - I THINK IT'S COZY. 118 00:05:06,407 --> 00:05:07,807 - HUH? - HMM? 119 00:05:07,841 --> 00:05:09,081 - ALL RIGHT. GIVE ME THE KEYS. 120 00:05:09,109 --> 00:05:10,879 I'LL DRIVE. - I DON'T MIND DRIVING. 121 00:05:10,911 --> 00:05:12,351 - YEAH, WHY DON'T YOU LET MARK DRIVE? 122 00:05:12,380 --> 00:05:14,950 IT'S MORE TRADITIONAL. 123 00:05:14,982 --> 00:05:16,822 - HUH? - HMM? 124 00:05:16,850 --> 00:05:18,950 - I'M FREEZING MY NIPS OFF. I'M GETTING IN THE CAR. 125 00:05:18,986 --> 00:05:20,046 - NO, NO, I HAVE TO SIT IN THE BACK SEAT, 126 00:05:20,087 --> 00:05:21,247 OR I'LL GET CARSICK. 127 00:05:21,288 --> 00:05:23,688 - I THOUGHT SITTING IN THE BACK SEAT MADE PEOPLE CARSICK. 128 00:05:23,724 --> 00:05:26,364 - YEAH, I'M AN ENIGMA. DEAL WITH IT. 129 00:05:26,394 --> 00:05:27,364 HEY, MARK. 130 00:05:27,395 --> 00:05:30,525 WOULD YOU LIKE TO OPEN THE DOOR FOR THE LADY? 131 00:05:30,564 --> 00:05:33,134 - OH, FINE. 132 00:05:33,166 --> 00:05:35,366 - THANK YOU. 133 00:05:39,407 --> 00:05:42,407 - DON'T JUST STAND THERE. GET IN THE CAR. 134 00:05:46,447 --> 00:05:47,417 - OH! - OH! [laughs] 135 00:05:47,448 --> 00:05:48,748 - I JUST LOVE THIS KITCHEN. 136 00:05:48,782 --> 00:05:50,922 THE ISLAND PROVIDES SO MUCH EXTRA SPACE. 137 00:05:50,951 --> 00:05:51,921 - OH, I KNOW. 138 00:05:51,952 --> 00:05:53,122 ALEX AND I CAN BOTH FIT ON HERE 139 00:05:53,153 --> 00:05:55,163 IF HE'S ON THE BOTTOM. 140 00:05:55,188 --> 00:05:58,088 - YOU ARE SO BAD. 141 00:05:58,125 --> 00:06:00,655 HEY, BOYS, I AM PUTTING THE HORSERADISH IN 142 00:06:00,694 --> 00:06:01,834 FOR THE SHRIMP COCKTAIL SAUCE. 143 00:06:01,862 --> 00:06:03,502 ALEX, DO YOU LIKE IT SPICY? 144 00:06:03,531 --> 00:06:06,831 'CAUSE WORD IN THE KITCHEN IS YOU DO. 145 00:06:06,867 --> 00:06:08,637 - YOU KNOW, HOWEVER YOU WANT TO MAKE IT IS FINE, MICHELLE. 146 00:06:08,669 --> 00:06:09,799 I'M SURE IT'LL BE GREAT. 147 00:06:09,837 --> 00:06:10,867 - YEAH, WELL, DON'T GET YOUR HOPES UP. 148 00:06:10,904 --> 00:06:14,144 IT'S ONE OF HER WEAKER SAUCES. 149 00:06:15,609 --> 00:06:18,109 - OKAY, WELL, I AM DONE DEVEINING THE SHRIMP. 150 00:06:18,145 --> 00:06:20,005 IS THERE ANYTHING MORE DISGUSTING I CAN DO? 151 00:06:20,047 --> 00:06:23,617 - IF YOU DON'T MIND, CAN YOU JULIENNE THE CRUDITES? 152 00:06:23,651 --> 00:06:26,021 - WHO'S COMING? 153 00:06:26,053 --> 00:06:28,693 - SO HOW'S WORK? - AH. 154 00:06:28,722 --> 00:06:30,622 SOMEONE BROKE INTO THE WAREHOUSE, 155 00:06:30,658 --> 00:06:32,688 STOLE SOME INVENTORY. 156 00:06:32,726 --> 00:06:35,696 INVENTORY MEANS STOCK. 157 00:06:35,729 --> 00:06:38,899 IN YOUR WORLD, IT WOULD BE LIKE IF YOU BOUGHT SOME WEED, 158 00:06:38,932 --> 00:06:42,802 AND THEN SOMEONE STOLE YOUR WEED. 159 00:06:42,836 --> 00:06:43,736 YOU KNOW, IT MUST BE NICE. 160 00:06:43,771 --> 00:06:45,941 YOU KNOW, YOU SIT HERE IN YOUR "OFFICE," 161 00:06:45,973 --> 00:06:47,213 COMING UP WITH YOUR LITTLE IDEAS. 162 00:06:47,240 --> 00:06:49,810 YOU KNOW, TAP, TAP, TAP, TAP, TAP ON YOUR COMPUTER, YOU KNOW? 163 00:06:49,843 --> 00:06:51,183 BACK UP THE MONEY TRUCK. 164 00:06:51,211 --> 00:06:53,211 YOU PROBABLY DON'T EVEN HAVE TO WEAR A SHIRT, DO YOU? 165 00:06:53,246 --> 00:06:55,746 - UH, WELL, SHE MAKES ME. 166 00:06:55,783 --> 00:07:00,193 - OKAY, ALL THAT CHEST HAIR. IT'S JUST A LITTLE '70s. 167 00:07:00,220 --> 00:07:01,620 UM, BUT ALEX, WHY DON'T YOU TELL HIM 168 00:07:01,655 --> 00:07:02,755 ABOUT THE NEW IDEA YOU'RE WORKING ON? 169 00:07:02,790 --> 00:07:04,860 - NAH. - NO, COME ON, TELL HIM. 170 00:07:04,892 --> 00:07:07,602 IT--WELL, BASICALLY, HE'S DOING THIS OFFSHOOT OF MENDEAVORS... 171 00:07:07,628 --> 00:07:08,758 - YEAH. - WHICH IS FOR KIDS, 172 00:07:08,796 --> 00:07:09,726 AND IT'S, LIKE, UPLOADING THESE VIDEOS... 173 00:07:09,763 --> 00:07:11,133 - UH-HUH. 174 00:07:11,164 --> 00:07:12,634 - WHY ARE YOU SMILING? 175 00:07:12,666 --> 00:07:13,966 - OH, NO, I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY. 176 00:07:14,001 --> 00:07:15,771 IT'S JUST, YOUR IDEA OF WORK 177 00:07:15,803 --> 00:07:17,743 WOULD GET MOST PEOPLE FIRED FROM WORK. 178 00:07:17,771 --> 00:07:19,511 [laughs] 179 00:07:19,540 --> 00:07:23,880 - KNOCK, KNOCK, WHO'S THERE? DEVILED EGGS! 180 00:07:23,911 --> 00:07:26,751 - WHERE DID THOSE COME FROM? - YOUR FRIDGE. 181 00:07:26,780 --> 00:07:30,820 - I DEVILED OUR EGGS? 182 00:07:30,851 --> 00:07:34,221 SERIOUSLY, ALEX, I DID NOT SEE THOSE EGGS BEFORE THEY APPEARED. 183 00:07:34,254 --> 00:07:37,194 I THINK SHE LAID THEM. 184 00:07:37,224 --> 00:07:38,864 - WHAT'S THIS? 185 00:07:38,892 --> 00:07:40,732 - OH, ALEX SPOKE AT NORTHWESTERN, 186 00:07:40,761 --> 00:07:41,861 SO I FRAMED THE TICKET. 187 00:07:41,895 --> 00:07:45,695 - WHITNEY, YOU ARE CRAFTY! 188 00:07:45,733 --> 00:07:47,773 I FRAME EVERYTHING. - YEAH, SHE'S NOT KIDDING. 189 00:07:47,801 --> 00:07:49,801 SHE EVEN FRAMED A FRAME. 190 00:07:49,837 --> 00:07:52,937 WE HAVE FRAMED FRAMES. 191 00:07:52,973 --> 00:07:56,113 - I USED TO FRAME PEOPLE. 192 00:07:56,143 --> 00:07:58,683 - LET ME SEE THIS. WHOA! 193 00:07:58,712 --> 00:07:59,682 WOW. 194 00:07:59,713 --> 00:08:01,853 GOT TO SPEAK AT NORTHWESTERN. VERY IMPRESSIVE! 195 00:08:01,882 --> 00:08:04,692 WHAT, DID THE QUIET GUY FROM PENN & TELLER CANCEL? 196 00:08:04,718 --> 00:08:10,858 [laughing loudly] 197 00:08:10,891 --> 00:08:12,831 'CAUSE A GUY WHO CAN'T TALK 198 00:08:12,860 --> 00:08:15,960 IS A BETTER SPEAKER THAN ALEX! 199 00:08:15,996 --> 00:08:17,796 - OH, MY GOD. BRIAN, STOP. 200 00:08:17,831 --> 00:08:18,671 - WHAT? - WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU? 201 00:08:18,699 --> 00:08:20,169 WHY CAN'T YOU JUST BE HAPPY FOR HIM? 202 00:08:20,200 --> 00:08:22,240 WHY CAN'T YOU JUST SAY, "HEY, ALEX, GOOD JOB"? 203 00:08:22,269 --> 00:08:23,769 YOU KNOW WHY? 204 00:08:23,804 --> 00:08:25,574 'CAUSE YOU'RE PROBABLY JEALOUS OR INSECURE, 205 00:08:25,606 --> 00:08:27,876 OR MAYBE IT'S JUST 'CAUSE YOU'RE A BIG JERK. 206 00:08:27,908 --> 00:08:30,908 SO...FRAME THAT. 207 00:08:32,245 --> 00:08:34,575 - WHOA, WHERE DID THAT COME FROM? 208 00:08:34,615 --> 00:08:35,975 - I DON'T KNOW. 209 00:08:36,016 --> 00:08:39,816 SHE REALLY LET YOU HAVE IT. 210 00:08:50,731 --> 00:08:52,171 - [grunts] 211 00:08:52,199 --> 00:08:53,899 - WHAT ARE YOU DOING? - TURNING DOWN THE HEAT. 212 00:08:53,934 --> 00:08:55,174 YOU MADE IT LIKE AN OVEN IN HERE. 213 00:08:55,202 --> 00:08:58,572 - YEAH. IT'S SO HOT. 214 00:09:00,107 --> 00:09:02,907 BREATH MINT? 215 00:09:02,943 --> 00:09:06,713 NO? JUST GONNA KEEP IT "NATCH"? 216 00:09:06,747 --> 00:09:07,717 COOL. 217 00:09:07,748 --> 00:09:10,618 COOL, COOL, COOL. 218 00:09:10,651 --> 00:09:11,751 - SO YOU'RE GONNA WANT TO CUT THE WHEEL 219 00:09:11,785 --> 00:09:13,185 ALL THE WAY TO THE LEFT, IF-- 220 00:09:13,220 --> 00:09:15,320 - OKAY, I AM A VERY CAPABLE DRIVER. 221 00:09:15,355 --> 00:09:17,955 I DROVE FROM MINNEAPOLIS TO CHICAGO IN A SNOWSTORM 222 00:09:17,991 --> 00:09:20,891 TO GET AWAY FROM A VERY UNSTABLE BOYFRIEND. 223 00:09:20,928 --> 00:09:23,858 - [singsong] LOVES TO TRAVEL. 224 00:09:23,897 --> 00:09:25,167 - GOD, NOW IT'S FREEZING! 225 00:09:25,198 --> 00:09:26,898 - [scoffs] YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT FREEZING IS. 226 00:09:26,934 --> 00:09:28,604 WHEN I WAS A COP, YOU KNOW HOW MANY DEAD DEER 227 00:09:28,636 --> 00:09:30,096 I HAD TO DRAG OUT OF FROZEN LAKES? 228 00:09:30,137 --> 00:09:32,237 - [singsong] ANIMAL LOVER. 229 00:09:34,007 --> 00:09:35,107 - YOU'RE NOT CUTTING THE WHEEL HARD ENOUGH. 230 00:09:35,142 --> 00:09:36,382 - WELL, THIS IS AS FAR AS IT GOES. 231 00:09:36,409 --> 00:09:37,809 - YEAH, LET ME HELP YOU TURN IT. 232 00:09:37,845 --> 00:09:39,345 - I'M TELLING YOU, IT DOESN'T GO ANY FURTHER! 233 00:09:39,379 --> 00:09:41,049 YOU KNOW WHAT, YOU BETTER GET YOUR HAND 234 00:09:41,081 --> 00:09:43,381 OFF THAT WHEEL, OR I WILL CHOP IT OFF. 235 00:09:43,416 --> 00:09:44,376 [The Righteous Brothers' Unchained Melody] 236 00:09:44,417 --> 00:09:45,847 - * WHOA 237 00:09:45,886 --> 00:09:50,656 * MY LOVE 238 00:09:50,691 --> 00:09:53,991 * MY DARLING 239 00:09:54,027 --> 00:09:57,797 * I'VE HUNGERED FOR 240 00:09:57,831 --> 00:10:00,971 * YOUR TOUCH 241 00:10:01,001 --> 00:10:03,001 * A LONG 242 00:10:07,808 --> 00:10:10,008 - OKAY, SO I'M GONNA ASK YOU A QUESTION, 243 00:10:10,043 --> 00:10:11,883 BUT I-I THINK I ALREADY KNOW THE ANSWER. 244 00:10:11,912 --> 00:10:15,352 HOW COME YOU CAN'T JUST BE QUIET? 245 00:10:15,382 --> 00:10:16,722 - I AM NOT JUST GONNA SIT THERE 246 00:10:16,750 --> 00:10:17,720 AND LET HIM MAKE FUN OF YOU LIKE THAT. 247 00:10:17,751 --> 00:10:19,751 IF YOU'RE NOT GONNA DEFEND YOURSELF, I WILL. 248 00:10:19,787 --> 00:10:20,547 - YEAH, BUT I DON'T FEEL LIKE 249 00:10:20,587 --> 00:10:22,057 I NEED TO DEFEND MYSELF, ALL RIGHT? 250 00:10:22,089 --> 00:10:24,359 WHEN SOMETHING NEEDS DEFENDING, I'LL DEFEND IT. 251 00:10:24,391 --> 00:10:26,991 - OH. LIKE YOU DID WITH MY SANDWICHES? 252 00:10:27,027 --> 00:10:29,257 - WE'LL EAT THEM TOMORROW! 253 00:10:29,296 --> 00:10:31,426 - FINE. YOU WANT ME TO BE QUIET, 254 00:10:31,464 --> 00:10:33,204 I'LL BE QUIET AND WEIRD LIKE MICHELLE. 255 00:10:33,233 --> 00:10:34,873 - NO, I DON'T WANT YOU TO BE WEIRD LIKE MICHELLE. 256 00:10:34,902 --> 00:10:38,912 I WANT YOU TO BE WEIRD LIKE YOU AND QUIET LIKE MICHELLE. 257 00:10:38,939 --> 00:10:40,839 LOOK. 258 00:10:40,874 --> 00:10:43,284 YOU'RE A PART OF THE MILLER FAMILY NOW, ALL RIGHT? 259 00:10:43,310 --> 00:10:45,110 AND YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO ACCEPT THE WAY WE ARE 260 00:10:45,145 --> 00:10:46,705 IF YOU WANT TO STAY IN IT. 261 00:10:46,747 --> 00:10:48,277 - [stifles laugh] PLEASE. 262 00:10:48,315 --> 00:10:51,045 YOU'RE SO IN LOVE WITH ME. 263 00:10:51,084 --> 00:10:53,054 - YOU KNOW WHAT, I DO IT WITH YOUR FAMILY, OKAY? 264 00:10:53,086 --> 00:10:54,446 WHEN YOUR MOTHER COMES OVER, 265 00:10:54,487 --> 00:10:56,357 I PRETEND LIKE IT'S THE FIRST TIME SHE EVER TOLD ME 266 00:10:56,389 --> 00:10:59,689 THE STORY ABOUT HOW SHE ALMOST MET TOM HANKS. 267 00:10:59,727 --> 00:11:00,827 YOU KNOW WHAT, FOR THE RECORD, 268 00:11:00,861 --> 00:11:01,701 THAT'S NOT EVEN A STORY. 269 00:11:01,729 --> 00:11:04,259 - I KNOW! IT DOESN'T HAVE A MIDDLE! 270 00:11:04,297 --> 00:11:07,897 - IT DOESN'T HAVE TOM HANKS! 271 00:11:07,935 --> 00:11:09,395 ALL RIGHT, I WANT YOU TO GO BACK OUT THERE, 272 00:11:09,436 --> 00:11:11,296 AND WHATEVER YOUR INSTINCTS TELL YOU TO DO, 273 00:11:11,338 --> 00:11:14,708 I WANT YOU TO DO THE OPPOSITE. 274 00:11:14,742 --> 00:11:18,182 - LAST TIME I DID THAT, I MADE FRIENDS. 275 00:11:18,211 --> 00:11:20,881 OKAY. 276 00:11:20,914 --> 00:11:22,824 WHY ARE MY SOCKS HERE? 277 00:11:22,850 --> 00:11:23,820 [gasps] 278 00:11:23,851 --> 00:11:26,951 DID SHE REMAKE OUR BED? 279 00:11:28,255 --> 00:11:32,325 'CAUSE THIS MORNING, I NAILED IT. 280 00:11:32,359 --> 00:11:34,799 - LAST NIGHT, I NAILED IT. 281 00:11:40,768 --> 00:11:42,398 - THERE SHE IS. 282 00:11:42,435 --> 00:11:43,895 HOW YOU DOING, WHIT? 283 00:11:43,937 --> 00:11:46,507 - EH, JUST A LITTLE EMBARRASSED, I GUESS. 284 00:11:46,539 --> 00:11:49,939 - NO, IT'S OKAY. EVERYONE HAS THEIR MOMENTS. 285 00:11:51,945 --> 00:11:53,505 - BRIAN, I'M REALLY SORRY THAT I SAID THOSE THINGS. 286 00:11:53,546 --> 00:11:55,446 THAT WAS NOT COOL. 287 00:11:55,482 --> 00:11:58,022 - I SAID, DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT. - OH. 288 00:11:58,051 --> 00:11:59,321 COME ON. 289 00:11:59,352 --> 00:12:01,252 IT'S WATER UNDER THE BRIDGE. COME HERE, BONES. 290 00:12:01,288 --> 00:12:03,218 - OH. - [laughs] 291 00:12:05,458 --> 00:12:08,898 MM, SKIN AND BONES. 292 00:12:08,929 --> 00:12:12,199 - OKAY, SO EVERYBODY GOOD? LET'S, UH-- 293 00:12:12,232 --> 00:12:13,472 WHY DON'T WE EAT, RIGHT? - OKAY. 294 00:12:13,500 --> 00:12:16,070 - ALL RIGHT, LET'S EAT. 295 00:12:16,103 --> 00:12:17,973 SO MICHELLE AND I WERE TALKING ON THE WAY IN, 296 00:12:18,005 --> 00:12:19,235 AND WE WERE WONDERING WHEN YOU GUYS 297 00:12:19,272 --> 00:12:22,282 ARE GONNA GROW UP AND MOVE OUT TO THE SUBURBS LIKE REAL ADULTS. 298 00:12:22,309 --> 00:12:27,979 - [laughs] 299 00:12:28,015 --> 00:12:30,045 - YOU KNOW, BRIAN THINKS THAT EVERYONE WHO LIVES IN THE CITY 300 00:12:30,083 --> 00:12:32,153 IS JUST AN OVERGROWN CHILD. 301 00:12:32,185 --> 00:12:33,385 WHAT DO YOU THINK, WHITNEY? 302 00:12:33,420 --> 00:12:35,890 - Y-YOU KNOW WHAT? [clears throat] 303 00:12:35,923 --> 00:12:38,063 THE AIOLI THAT YOU MADE IS JUST--IT'S TOP-NOTCH. 304 00:12:38,091 --> 00:12:39,061 HOW DO YOU DO THAT? 305 00:12:39,092 --> 00:12:43,132 - YEAH. - WHITNEY? 306 00:12:43,163 --> 00:12:45,933 - I THINK THAT EVERYONE IS ENTITLED TO THEIR OWN OPINION, 307 00:12:45,966 --> 00:12:48,996 AND I RESPECT BRIAN'S OPINION. 308 00:12:49,036 --> 00:12:51,366 - OH, THANK YOU, WHITNEY. 309 00:12:51,404 --> 00:12:54,014 - HEY, HAVE YOU GUYS SEEN BRIDESMAIDS? 310 00:12:54,041 --> 00:12:55,281 'CAUSE WE RENTED IT THE OTHER NIGHT. 311 00:12:55,308 --> 00:12:57,138 I THOUGHT IT WAS HYSTERICAL, BUT BRIAN-- 312 00:12:57,177 --> 00:12:59,577 WELL, YOU TELL THEM. 313 00:12:59,612 --> 00:13:02,952 - CHICKS ARE JUST NOT FUNNY. 314 00:13:02,983 --> 00:13:07,323 - THAT'S WHAT HE SAID. 315 00:13:07,354 --> 00:13:10,324 THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT HE SAID. 316 00:13:23,937 --> 00:13:27,507 - I LIKE SNOW. - REALLY? 317 00:13:27,540 --> 00:13:30,040 - WOW. 318 00:13:30,077 --> 00:13:31,607 - ACTUALLY, I TAKE IT BACK. 319 00:13:31,644 --> 00:13:33,314 THERE ARE TWO FUNNY WOMEN IN MOVIES. 320 00:13:33,346 --> 00:13:36,446 MRS. DOUBTFIRE AND MADEA, BEFORE SHE GOT POLITICAL. 321 00:13:36,483 --> 00:13:38,223 [laughs] 322 00:13:38,251 --> 00:13:39,991 - WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT THAT, WHITNEY? 323 00:13:40,020 --> 00:13:42,460 - I... 324 00:13:42,489 --> 00:13:45,859 THE RAIN'S NOT BAD EITHER. 325 00:13:45,893 --> 00:13:48,933 - WE ARE NOT TALKING ABOUT THE WEATHER, WHITNEY. 326 00:13:48,962 --> 00:13:51,562 - SO...UM, WOULD ANYONE LIKE A BEER? 327 00:13:51,598 --> 00:13:54,868 - NO! 328 00:13:54,902 --> 00:13:56,372 - OKAY. NO BEERS. 329 00:13:56,403 --> 00:13:58,013 - WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 330 00:13:58,038 --> 00:14:00,868 BRIAN IS BEING INSUFFERABLE! 331 00:14:00,908 --> 00:14:03,908 TEN MINUTES AGO, YOU TORE HIM A WELL-DESERVED NEW ONE, 332 00:14:03,944 --> 00:14:05,584 AND NOW YOU'RE JUST-- JUST SITTING THERE, 333 00:14:05,612 --> 00:14:08,452 CHUCKLING LIKE AN IDIOT. 334 00:14:08,481 --> 00:14:11,921 WHO ARE YOU, ALEX? 335 00:14:11,952 --> 00:14:16,162 - UH, UH...HEY. 336 00:14:16,189 --> 00:14:19,289 - HAY IS FOR HORSES. 337 00:14:19,326 --> 00:14:22,326 NOW IF YOU WILL EXCUSE ME! 338 00:14:23,997 --> 00:14:25,227 [door slams] 339 00:14:25,265 --> 00:14:29,295 - OKAY, WELL, I'M OBVIOUSLY GOING IN THERE. 340 00:14:33,706 --> 00:14:36,206 - [laughs] IDIOT. 341 00:14:39,980 --> 00:14:41,210 - HEY. 342 00:14:41,248 --> 00:14:42,948 OH, THOSE ARE DIRTY. 343 00:14:42,983 --> 00:14:45,323 - I KNOW. 344 00:14:45,352 --> 00:14:47,092 I'M SORRY I YELLED AT YOU. 345 00:14:47,120 --> 00:14:49,320 - NO! THAT WAS AWESOME. 346 00:14:49,356 --> 00:14:53,086 IT WAS LIKE GETTING TO SEE OSCAR OUT OF THE GARBAGE CAN. 347 00:14:53,126 --> 00:14:55,926 - LOOK, I LOVE BRIAN, AND WE'RE REALLY HAPPY. 348 00:14:55,963 --> 00:14:57,633 BUT SOMETIMES HE CAN BE A BULLY, 349 00:14:57,664 --> 00:15:01,034 AND IT'S JUST SO COOL TO SEE YOU STAND UP TO HIM. 350 00:15:01,068 --> 00:15:02,668 - IS THAT WHAT I DID? 351 00:15:02,702 --> 00:15:05,072 I BLACKED OUT. 352 00:15:05,105 --> 00:15:07,035 - NO ONE EVER GIVES IT BACK TO HIM, 353 00:15:07,074 --> 00:15:09,084 AND SOMETIMES HE NEEDS TO HEAR THAT. 354 00:15:09,109 --> 00:15:12,379 I MEAN, WHAT HAPPENED TO MY BADASS SISTER-IN-LAW? 355 00:15:12,412 --> 00:15:15,082 - YOU THINK I'M A BADASS? 356 00:15:15,115 --> 00:15:18,045 BUT I'M ALWAYS SO TIRED. 357 00:15:18,085 --> 00:15:20,015 - YEAH, I MEAN, YOU DON'T GIVE A FIG 358 00:15:20,053 --> 00:15:22,193 ABOUT DECORATING OR HOUSEKEEPING OR... 359 00:15:22,222 --> 00:15:25,992 - OKAY, YEAH, I GIVE A FIG. 360 00:15:26,026 --> 00:15:29,426 - HOW A TOP SHEET WORKS. - WHAT'S UP? 361 00:15:29,462 --> 00:15:32,102 - I LOVE THAT YOU ARE A LOOSE CANNON, 362 00:15:32,132 --> 00:15:34,702 EVEN THOUGH IT MEANS WE CAN NEVER BRING THE KIDS WITH US, 363 00:15:34,734 --> 00:15:37,244 BECAUSE WE DON'T KNOW HOW COLORFUL YOUR LANGUAGE 364 00:15:37,270 --> 00:15:42,110 IS GONNA BE OR WHAT THEY'RE GONNA FIND IN YOUR DVD CABINET. 365 00:15:42,142 --> 00:15:45,352 WHAT DO YOU HAVE IN THERE? 366 00:15:45,378 --> 00:15:47,708 - YOU WERE RIGHT NOT TO BRING THEM. 367 00:15:47,747 --> 00:15:50,517 OH, BUT SOME OF IT IS ANIMATED. 368 00:15:50,550 --> 00:15:52,190 - ALEX, I NEED TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT SOMETHING, 369 00:15:52,219 --> 00:15:55,359 AND YOU MIGHT NOT LIKE IT. 370 00:15:55,388 --> 00:15:57,488 - CAN'T WAIT. 371 00:15:57,524 --> 00:15:59,134 - EVERY TIME WE COME OUT HERE FOR A VISIT, 372 00:15:59,159 --> 00:16:01,159 MICHELLE ISN'T HERSELF FOR, LIKE, A WEEK. 373 00:16:01,194 --> 00:16:05,074 AND I DID THE MATH, AND I THINK... 374 00:16:05,098 --> 00:16:07,098 IT'S WHITNEY. 375 00:16:08,668 --> 00:16:09,638 - WHITNEY? 376 00:16:09,669 --> 00:16:10,569 - YEAH, SHE'S A BAD INFLUENCE. 377 00:16:10,603 --> 00:16:12,743 YOU NEED TO CONTROL YOUR WOMAN, BABY BRO. 378 00:16:12,772 --> 00:16:17,082 YOU NEED TO CONTROL HER. 379 00:16:17,110 --> 00:16:18,750 - HUH. - YEAH. 380 00:16:18,778 --> 00:16:21,748 - HERE'S THE DEAL. [clears throat] 381 00:16:21,781 --> 00:16:24,551 YOU CAN TAKE SHOTS AT ME, MY HAIR, YOU KNOW, 382 00:16:24,584 --> 00:16:26,794 WHERE I LIVE, MY "LITTLE WEBSITE." 383 00:16:26,819 --> 00:16:28,559 THAT'S FINE. THAT'S WHAT WE DO. 384 00:16:28,588 --> 00:16:31,518 BUT WHITNEY IS OFF-LIMITS. 385 00:16:31,558 --> 00:16:34,458 COOL? - COOL, YEAH. 386 00:16:34,494 --> 00:16:36,104 I MEAN, BUT YOU UNDERSTAND THERE'S A LOT OF MATERIAL 387 00:16:36,129 --> 00:16:37,299 TO WORK WITH, RIGHT? - I--YES, THERE'S A LOT. 388 00:16:37,330 --> 00:16:41,000 - ENORMOUS AMOUNT OF MATERIAL. 389 00:16:42,335 --> 00:16:45,435 YOU KNOW I'M HAPPY FOR YOU, RIGHT? 390 00:16:45,472 --> 00:16:49,312 - WELL, DON'T MAKE IT WEIRD, BRIAN. 391 00:16:49,342 --> 00:16:51,382 - YOU KNOW, MICHELLE, I MEAN, THEY'RE BROTHERS. 392 00:16:51,411 --> 00:16:52,781 THEY'VE BEEN LIKE THIS FOREVER. 393 00:16:52,812 --> 00:16:54,412 IT'S NOT LIKE THEY'RE GONNA CHANGE ANYTIME SOON. 394 00:16:54,447 --> 00:16:55,817 - THEN YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE TO EITHER. 395 00:16:55,848 --> 00:16:57,748 - YEAH, BUT I PROMISED ALEX 396 00:16:57,784 --> 00:16:59,654 THAT AROUND HIS FAMILY I WOULD BEHAVE. 397 00:16:59,686 --> 00:17:02,556 - YOU DO THAT, AND YOU'RE GONNA WIND UP DRINKING TEQUILA 398 00:17:02,589 --> 00:17:04,789 AND ORANGE JUICE IN A 7-ELEVEN PARKING LOT 399 00:17:04,824 --> 00:17:08,564 PLAYING BEJEWELED JUST TO FEEL ALIVE. 400 00:17:09,862 --> 00:17:11,702 - I FEEL LIKE YOU'RE KIND OF A BADASS TOO, HUH? 401 00:17:11,731 --> 00:17:14,071 - OH, YOU HAVE NO IDEA. 402 00:17:14,101 --> 00:17:17,601 I SPENT THREE HOURS IN MALL JAIL ONCE. 403 00:17:17,637 --> 00:17:20,607 BLACK FRIDAY, THE GLOVES COME OFF. 404 00:17:20,640 --> 00:17:22,640 MM-HMM. - OH. 405 00:17:24,544 --> 00:17:26,614 YOU KNOW, THIS ISN'T THAT DIRTY. 406 00:17:26,646 --> 00:17:28,416 I THINK THIS HAS ANOTHER WEARING IN IT, WHAT DO YOU THINK? 407 00:17:28,448 --> 00:17:30,218 - OH! 408 00:17:30,250 --> 00:17:31,820 YOU ARE ADORABLE! 409 00:17:31,851 --> 00:17:33,751 STOP THAT. - OH! 410 00:17:35,822 --> 00:17:36,592 - A LITTLE MORE. 411 00:17:36,623 --> 00:17:38,433 A LITTLE MORE. A LITTLE MO--STOP! 412 00:17:38,458 --> 00:17:40,588 OH, MY GOD! YOU ALMOST HIT HIS BUMPER! 413 00:17:40,627 --> 00:17:41,757 - YOU KNOW WHAT? 414 00:17:41,794 --> 00:17:44,304 FORGET IT. I DON'T EVEN WANT TO GO ANYMORE. 415 00:17:44,331 --> 00:17:46,131 YOU HAVE TAKEN ALL THE FUN OUT OF THIS DAY. 416 00:17:46,166 --> 00:17:47,196 - I DON'T WANT TO GO EITHER! 417 00:17:47,234 --> 00:17:49,444 I WILL GET MY PANTS AT ANOTHER WAREHOUSE STORE. 418 00:17:49,469 --> 00:17:50,469 - FINE. - NO! 419 00:17:50,503 --> 00:17:52,613 NOBODY IS GOING ANYWHERE! 420 00:17:52,639 --> 00:17:54,309 - WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH YOU? 421 00:17:54,341 --> 00:17:57,711 - YOU TWO ARE SO FRUSTRATING. YOU ARE JUST LIKE THIS CAR. 422 00:17:57,744 --> 00:17:59,814 BACK AND FORTH AND BACK AND FORTH AND BACK AND FORTH, 423 00:17:59,846 --> 00:18:01,846 AND YOU NEVER GET ANYWHERE! 424 00:18:03,450 --> 00:18:04,680 I PLANNED THIS WHOLE DAY 425 00:18:04,717 --> 00:18:08,857 SO THAT YOU TWO COULD FINALLY GET ALL YOUR CRAP OUT OF THE WAY 426 00:18:08,888 --> 00:18:11,388 AND REALIZE YOU SHOULD JUST BE TOGETHER. 427 00:18:11,424 --> 00:18:12,164 - WAIT A MINUTE. 428 00:18:12,192 --> 00:18:15,902 YOU PLANNED THIS? LIKE A DATE? 429 00:18:15,928 --> 00:18:18,268 IS THAT WHY YOU SAID I COULDN'T WEAR MY PAJAMA PANTS? 430 00:18:18,298 --> 00:18:20,828 - OH. I LOVE PAJAMA PANTS. 431 00:18:20,867 --> 00:18:22,897 - SEE? YOU GUYS BELONG TOGETHER! 432 00:18:22,935 --> 00:18:25,435 BUT YOU KEEP PLAYING THESE DUMB GAMES! 433 00:18:25,472 --> 00:18:27,712 I MEAN, YOU TWO HAVE SOMETHING 434 00:18:27,740 --> 00:18:30,440 THAT EVERYONE WANTS. 435 00:18:30,477 --> 00:18:33,347 DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS TO FIND THAT? 436 00:18:33,380 --> 00:18:37,520 SO STOP WASTING YOUR TIME, STOP WASTING MY TIME, 437 00:18:37,550 --> 00:18:41,920 AND JUST DO IT ALREADY! 438 00:18:41,954 --> 00:18:43,894 - LILY, I APPRECIATE WHAT YOU'RE TRYING TO DO, 439 00:18:43,923 --> 00:18:46,163 BUT I'VE GOT THIS. OKAY? 440 00:18:46,193 --> 00:18:48,703 IT'S GONNA HAPPEN WHEN I DECIDE IT'S GONNA HAPPEN. 441 00:18:48,728 --> 00:18:50,798 - EXCUSE ME, BUT I ALREADY TOLD YOU 442 00:18:50,830 --> 00:18:52,530 THAT IT IS NOT GOING TO HAPPEN. 443 00:18:52,565 --> 00:18:54,525 - YOU KNOW WHAT? I QUIT, I'M OUT. 444 00:18:54,567 --> 00:18:56,437 YOU TWO LUNATICS ARE ON YOUR OWN. 445 00:18:56,469 --> 00:19:00,209 - HEY, LILY. WAIT A MINUTE! 446 00:19:00,240 --> 00:19:03,580 HOLD ON A SECOND! 447 00:19:03,610 --> 00:19:06,410 - MARK! 448 00:19:06,446 --> 00:19:07,676 - OW. 449 00:19:07,714 --> 00:19:10,824 - OH, MY GOD! HONEY, ARE YOU OKAY? 450 00:19:13,586 --> 00:19:16,256 - "HONEY"? 451 00:19:16,289 --> 00:19:18,759 - WHAT? 452 00:19:18,791 --> 00:19:22,501 - IT'S HAPPENING... JUST LIKE I PLANNED IT. 453 00:19:23,930 --> 00:19:26,470 - NO, NO, NO. 454 00:19:26,499 --> 00:19:29,499 JUST LIKE I PLANNED IT. 455 00:19:32,539 --> 00:19:35,209 - OH, THAT WAS FUN! - YEAH, IT WAS! 456 00:19:35,242 --> 00:19:37,382 WE SHOULD DO IT AGAIN IN, LIKE, A YEAR. 457 00:19:37,410 --> 00:19:39,380 - HEY. [laughs] 458 00:19:39,412 --> 00:19:41,482 YOU TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF, YOU LESBIANS. 459 00:19:41,514 --> 00:19:42,884 [laughs] 460 00:19:42,915 --> 00:19:44,275 - AND GOOD-BYE. - [laughs] 461 00:19:44,317 --> 00:19:47,317 IT'S 'CAUSE HIS HAIR IS SO LONG. 462 00:19:50,490 --> 00:19:51,820 - LOOK, I KNOW TODAY WAS HARD FOR YOU, 463 00:19:51,858 --> 00:19:55,428 SO I APPRECIATE YOU SHOWING RESTRAINT AROUND BRIAN. 464 00:19:55,462 --> 00:19:57,362 YOU GAVE IT THE GOOD, OLD COLLEGE TRY. 465 00:19:57,397 --> 00:20:00,597 - MM. - COMMUNITY COLLEGE. 466 00:20:00,633 --> 00:20:02,503 - CAN IT JUST BE ME AND YOU FROM NOW ON? 467 00:20:02,535 --> 00:20:03,765 - OH, AND MICHELLE TOO. 468 00:20:03,803 --> 00:20:05,443 SHE MADE US LUNCHES FOR TOMORROW. 469 00:20:05,472 --> 00:20:08,342 - LUNCHES ARE SO '90s. 470 00:20:08,375 --> 00:20:10,435 OH, WOW. - WHAT? 471 00:20:10,477 --> 00:20:12,707 - SHE WROTE US A THANK-YOU CARD... 472 00:20:12,745 --> 00:20:14,345 IN CALLIGRAPHY. 473 00:20:14,381 --> 00:20:17,321 - OH, YEAH, SHE TEACHES IT TO SPECIAL NEEDS KIDS. 474 00:20:17,350 --> 00:20:20,390 - COURSE SHE DOES. 475 00:20:20,420 --> 00:20:23,260 I BUY CLOTHES MADE BY KIDS. 476 00:20:23,290 --> 00:20:26,430 - NO, YOU BUY CLOTHES MADE FOR KIDS. 477 00:20:26,459 --> 00:20:28,899 [laughs] 478 00:20:28,928 --> 00:20:30,858 - SO TELL ME THE TRUTH, DO YOU WISH THAT I WAS MORE, 479 00:20:30,897 --> 00:20:34,397 LIKE, DOMESTIC, LIKE MICHELLE? 480 00:20:34,434 --> 00:20:36,804 - TOTALLY HONEST? 481 00:20:36,836 --> 00:20:39,406 THIS WORKS FOR ME. 482 00:20:39,439 --> 00:20:41,669 PLUS, IF YOU WERE MORE LIKE MICHELLE, 483 00:20:41,708 --> 00:20:45,778 THEN YOU WOULDN'T KNOW HOW TO PLAY OUR FAVORITE GAME... 484 00:20:45,812 --> 00:20:48,822 NAME THAT UTENSIL! - YES! 485 00:20:48,848 --> 00:20:53,288 - HERE WE GO. - THE SPANKER! 486 00:20:54,321 --> 00:20:56,991 - AH. 487 00:20:57,023 --> 00:21:01,893 - CHEESE HOUSE! 488 00:21:01,928 --> 00:21:04,498 GIANT TWEEZERS! 489 00:21:04,531 --> 00:21:07,001 - I LOVE YOU. - I LOVE YOU. 490 00:21:07,033 --> 00:21:09,943 [both chuckling] 491 00:21:09,969 --> 00:21:11,439 - WHERE ARE YOU GOING? 492 00:21:11,471 --> 00:21:14,411 - I'M GOING INTO THE BEDROOM. 493 00:21:14,441 --> 00:21:16,881 BRING THE SPANKER. - [laughs] 35327

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