Original subtitles

[upbeat rock music]

- [sighs]

[whistling]

So, what you guys doing?

Playing chess?

- What are you doing?

Stating the obvious?

- Sorry.

I'm just bored.

Mae is so late--she was

supposed to be here, like...

three minutes ago.

- Well, we need quiet.

Yeah, right, quiet.

[mutters]

[whispers] You know I don't

do well when Mae's not around.

- Shh.

I need to concentrate.

I've never beaten Ricky before.

- Ooh, looks like

that's about to change.

- Really?

- Shh.

Your move.

- Ooh.

[mutters]

Eeh.

Zzz....

- Dawn, you can't help him!

- My bad. It's just that this

game could take all "knight,"

even though Nicky's

up-"pawn" victory.

- Knight takes pawn.

Boom!

- Checkmate.

- Wha--

Seriously?

I thought you were helping me.

- I thought I was too.

Well, at least for a moment,

you had hope.

- Which is worse than

losing on my own.

You know, I didn't think losing

could be anymore painful,

but you know what, you did it.

- And normally,

I enjoy beating Nicky,

but you made it so easy, that

you took all the joy out of it.

- Well, at least you guys

are talking to me.

I was kind of bored.

- You always do this, Dawn.

Whenever Mae's not around,

you ruin whatever we're doing.

- Let's go again.

- [sighs]

- Sorry I'm late, Dawn,

but I have huge news.

I just got accepted to

Hawk Crest Academy!

- The boarding school

that wait-listed you?

- Now they're

the boarding school that

un-wait-listed me!

[both shriek]

- I'm so happy for you!

When do you start, next year?

- Next week.

- You mean next week

of next year?

- No, next week of next week!

both: Uh-oh.

- Why aren't you

jumping anymore?

- You really start next week?

- Yeah.

Somebody dropped out,

and I got their spot.

How lucky is that?

- So lucky.

[chuckles] Wow, my BFF gets to

get into her dream school.

Did you hear that, guys?

- We heard.

- Mazel tov.

- To her dream school,

which is in a different city...

[chuckles]

Far, far away.

You know I don't do well

when Mae's not around.

- Neither do we.

- Yeah, I think we both

just got check-"Mae'd."

[upbeat music]

- ♪ Na, na, na, na, na, na,

na, na, na, na, na ♪

[whistling]

♪ ♪

♪ Na, na, na, na, na, na ♪

- ♪ Hey! ♪

♪ One, two ♪

- ♪ Na, na, na, na, na, na ♪

- ♪ One, two, three, four! ♪

[cheerful music]

- Wow, so you're

really going away to boarding

school next week?

That's just wow!

- Speaking of wow,

that's the school observatory,

and that's

the equestrian center.

I can learn dressage.

I don't even know what that is,

but I can learn it.

- It's choreographed

horse dancing.

See, now you don't have to

go away to that school.

- [laughs]

You're hilarious, Dawn.

It's gonna be so much fun

when you visit on the weekends.

Plus, we can FaceShack

and SnapBlab.

- Yeah, you know what,

when you really think about it,

nothing's gonna change.

- Everything's gonna change.

Look how crazy Dawn got

when Mae wasn't here

for three minutes.

With Mae gone for good,

our goose is cooked.

- Maybe our goose is fine.

Maybe we're

underestimating Dawn.

Maybe she'll handle it

better than we think.

- Honestly,

getting into Hawk Crest

is a dream come true for me.

- Well, if it's a dream

come true for you,

it's a dream come true for me.

- See?

Our goose is good.

Dawn's taking it in stride.

- Or maybe she's faking it.

- I don't think so.

Whenever Dawn fakes

being okay with something,

her voice gets

all high-pitched.

[computer trills]

- Ooh, it's Amber,

my soon-to-be roommate.

- [high-pitched]

Did you say "roommate"?

- [high-pitched]

Did she just say "roommate"?

- Hi, Amber.

- Hi, Mae.

I can't wait for you

to get to school.

I saw our new room today,

and it has bunk beds!

- Bunk beds?

- [high-pitched] Bunk beds?

- Goose cooking!

- We're fine,

until she drifts into

the high-pitched gibberish.

- Isn't Amber great?

- [pitch heightening]

Yeah, she seems really sweet...

[high-pitched gibberish]

- We need to find Dawn

a new Mae!

[mug shatters]

- [high-pitched gibberish]

- And you a new

"I Heart Sweater Vests" mug.

And a new sweater vest.

♪ ♪

- Thank you for coming

to the rose ceremony,

where we will be determining

which one of you will become

Dawn's new best friend.

- Rose ceremony?

I thought you said

we were just coming here

for free sandwiches.

- Yeah, and I've already got

best friends.

both: Who?

- You guys.

- Oh, yeah, right.

- Forget this--I'm taking

my free sandwich and leaving.

- There are no sandwiches.

- No sandwiches?

- Mm-mm.

- Then I'm taking the rose

and leaving.

- Then we can't have

a rose ceremony!

- No "ceremonay"?

Then I'm taking the "doilay."

- Oh.

- No sandwiches, no doily,

no best friends?

I'm taking the tray.

- Well, that went south fast.

- Tell me about it.

That was Grandma's good tray!

- No, we need to

expand our search

to find Dawn a new best friend.

- Well, looks like

I'll just have to turn on

the ol' Ricky charm.

[clicks tongue]

- This should be fun.

Mm.

[mumbles]

And here comes the dry lips...

- [lips smacking]

- And now the sweaty palm...

- Hi.

[grunts]

- And now the girl leaves.

- [mumbles]

[sighs]

- Hey, how'd that go?

- [high-pitched] Great!

- Really? 'Cause it was like

watching a bad movie

with a terrible, terrible cast.

- Cast.

That's it.

That's how we'll solve

our Dawn problem.

- Genius--we find a girl

with a broken leg,

two legs if we're lucky,

we place her in front of Dawn,

Dawn signs her cast, boom!

BFFs.

- Or...

we say we're making a movie,

and audition girls to be cast

as Dawn's best friend.

- Well, that sounds like

a lot more work, but okay.

[upbeat rock music]

- Tom, I'm worried about Dawn.

- Well, she seems okay.

Her voice isn't doing that

high-pitched thing anymore.

- ♪ She's Mae and I'm Dawn ♪

[plays blues riff]

♪ I miss her bad

and she ain't even gone ♪

♪ ♪

♪ We had good times

I'll always remember ♪

♪ ♪

♪ Now she'll be having them

with her roomie... ♪

"Amber."

♪ ♪

- Got the blues, huh?

- I got 'em bad, Daddy-o.

[continues playing]

- Okay, you wanna

talk about it,

rather than keep singing?

- Not now, Mamma Jamma.

- Okay, we're gonna take five.

Here.

- Oh, wow.

Look, everybody has a roommate

at boarding school.

It's no big deal.

[grunts]

- It's a very big deal.

It's a huge deal.

Now "Amber" gets to be closer

to Mae than I am.

- Honey, you and Mae

will always be close.

- Not in distance, but--

Mamma Jorker!

- I'm gonna miss out on a ton

of new experiences with Mae.

Every first Mae has from now on

will be with "Amber," not me.

"Amber" gets to be

Mae's first roommate,

and I wanted to be

Mae's first roommate.

"Amber"...

- What's more important,

being Mae's first roommate

or being Mae's

first best friend?

- Why can't I be both?

- Honey,

Mae already has a roommate.

- Sorry, sweetie,

I know it's hard to accept,

but sometimes,

we can't have everything.

Aw.

[smooches]

- We love you, kiddo.

[smooches]

- Hold on.

Maybe I can have everything.

[upbeat rock music]

♪ ♪

[knocks on door]

[playing "When the Saints

Go Marching In"]

♪ Oh, when the Dawn ♪

♪ Comes moving in ♪

♪ Oh, when the Dawn

comes moving in ♪

Hey, roomie, surprise!

♪ ♪

[upbeat rock music]

[upbeat rock music]

- Wow, there is a lot of room

in these drawers.

- That's because

I've been emptying them.

- [whistling]

- Because I've been packing?

Because I'm leaving for school

in a few days?

- I know, and we're gonna be

roommates until you go.

This way, we're not only

first best friends,

we're also first roommates.

- Dawn, I really

don't have time for this.

- You're right,

we need to speed things up.

[grunts]

[grunts]

There, all moved in.

Now we have time for

our first roommate pizza party.

What kinda pizza do you want?

- I don't--

- Yeah, you know what,

I'm gonna surprise you.

Hi, I'd like to order

one First Roommate Surprise.

Yeah, it's half first roommate,

half first best friend.

[chuckles]

[whispers]

It's a meat lovers.

♪ ♪

- All right, time to get

the audition started.

- I still don't understand

why you get to be the director.

- Because I'm wearing

the hat and the scarf.

- It's not even your scarf.

It's Dawn's.

- Oh, so you think you can

pull off wearing Dawn's scarf?

- Well, I'm pulling off

wearing her deodorant.

- That's not something you say

to win an argument.

All right,

who's our first audition?

- Ethel.

- Ethel?

Yeah, I don't think so.

Who's after Ethel?

- Thank you for coming.

Please, have a seat.

- You'll be reading

the part of Dawn's new BFF,

and Ricky will be reading

the part of Dawn.

- Why are you handing me this?

- It's the Dawn wig.

Put it on.

- You put it on.

You're already wearing

Dawn's scarf.

- Well, yeah, but

you're wearing her deodorant.

And not enough of it.

- Great, she's gone.

- Diva.

- [scoffs] I know, right?

- I was talking about you.

Ready, Marcia?

And action.

- Mae, it's me, Dawn.

What's on your mind?

- I gotta ask,

are we best friends?

Are we not best friends?

Mama...

has to know.

[both sigh]

- Marcia, Marcia, Marcia.

- Thanks for coming in.

- I'm sorry,

I didn't have time to prepare.

I dropped the script

in my pool.

both: Pool?

- It took my butler

forever to dry it.

both: Butler?

- Will you excuse us

for a second?

We're going about this

the wrong way.

Mae is nice, sweet, caring,

the best friend

Dawn could ever ask for.

But have we ever benefited

from their friendship?

- No.

Never!

- Exactly.

So, why don't we find

a new best friend for Dawn,

from whom we can also

reap some benefits?

- Like a pool

and a butler!

- Why stop there?

I'm sure one of these girls

has even more to offer.

Hey, Marcia, can you hang out

for a little while?

We have some more girls to see.

- Who's next?

- Bertha.

- Bertha?

Ethel!

You're back in.

♪ ♪

- Wow, we ate that whole pizza.

What an experience

that will never be topped

by any other experience

with anyone ever!

So, what do you wanna do next?

- I should really

get back to packing.

- Perfect, you pack,

and I'll take care

of the bunk beds.

- Bunk beds?

- Uh, yeah,

they're essential to

the whole first roommate,

best friend experience.

Ooh...

Hi, yeah,

I'd like for you to put aside

one roommate surprise bunk bed.

Yeah.

Yeah, it's half first roommate,

half first best friend.

[chuckles]

[whispers] It's the cheapest

bunk bed you have.

♪ ♪

- Congratulations, ladies,

you are the two final actresses

up for the role

of Dawn's new BFF.

- This is a tough decision

for us.

You both have your strengths.

Marcia,

your fearlessness, effort,

butler, and heated pool

have really set you apart.

- And Danielle,

the camera loves you...

- [giggles]

- And your parents' yacht

and private jet.

- Right now,

it's too close to call.

Do either of you

have anything else

you can bring to the role?

- Say, a trampoline, jet skis?

- Motorcycle with a sidecar

we can both ride in?

- What does any of this

have to do with acting?

- You're out, Marcia!

We don't have time for

difficult actresses!

- What?

- Hit the bricks, sister!

Congrats, Danielle,

you're our new private jet.

- BFF.

- BFF.

♪ ♪

- So, I'll put up

pictures of my cat, Debbie.

- No way.

And I can put up

pictures of my cat, Debbie.

both: Double Debbies!

[screwdriver whirring]

What is that noise?

- Don't mind me!

Yeah, it turns out

even the cheapest bunk beds

are kinda pricy,

so I got some wood out of

the dumpster at Get Sporty,

and I figured I'd DIY it...

[screwdriver whirs]

Dawn It Yourself.

- Who is that?

- Oh, sorry.

Amber, meet Dawn,

Dawn, Amber.

- Hi, nice to--

[whirring]

- Oh, sorry,

looks like I just had

one more righty to tighty.

You were saying?

- I was just saying

it's so nice to--

[whirring]

- Nice to meet you, Hamper.

- Anyway, we have

a big decision to make.

There's a tradition

at Hawk Crest,

where new roommates

choose a unique experience

that only they will share.

It bonds them forever.

- Forever?

- Oh, cool.

What did you have in mind?

I'm down for

whatever you wanna do.

- Great,

'cause I wanna do something

everyone at school

will be talking about:

Skydiving!

- [scoffs] Skydiving?

Please.

Mae's afraid of heights.

- I love it, and

it'll definitely be a first.

- Uh, we should

probably do our first

before that first, though.

We gotta go, Hamhock.

It's time for

bunk bed bonding night.

Ooh!

I call top.

[creaking]

[clatters, crashes]

Hey, look at that.

I can skydive too.

[squealing softly]

- [sighs]

- ♪ Mae kicked me out ♪

♪ I'm feeling so gloomy ♪

♪ As it turns out ♪

♪ I won't be

her first roomy... ♪

[voice modulating]

[plays blues riff]

[cheerful music]

- Okay, there's no script

this time.

We need to improvise a scene

with the actress

who's playing Dawn.

That's her.

- Well, I guess

your Dawn's best friend now.

Are these your manis

or your pedis?

- Hey, Dawn, sorry to...

interrupt, but we wanted you

to meet someone.

- And action.

- Hi, I'm Danielle.

- Oh, hi, I'm Dawn.

Sorry, I'm really not in the

mood to meet anyone right now.

- Oh, you poor thing.

Shh,

everything's gonna be okay.

No, that didn't feel right.

Let me try again.

Maybe I should have an accent.

- I can't believe you guys.

- It's not what you think.

- Yeah.

- So, it's not that you were

afraid I'd ruin your lives

without Mae in town,

so you faked producing a movie

and auditioned girls to play

the part of my new best friend?

- Okay, it's exactly

what you think.

- This may be

your worst plan ever.

- Please, her parents own

a private jet.

- Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Private jet?

Can we skydive out of it?

- I guess.

- [British accent]

'Ello, 'ello, I'm Danielle,

and everything's

going to be jolly good!

- Yes.

Yes, it is, Private Jet.

- Danielle.

- Danielle.

[upbeat rock music]

♪ ♪

- I'm super psyched

we're doing this, Mae!

Can you believe we're gonna

jump out of a plane?

- No, I cannot!

- I mean, are we crazy or what?

- I'm definitely

going with crazy!

- Okay, we're approaching

the drop zone!

The instructor's

in the cockpit,

and auditioned girls to play

the part of my new best friend?

- Okay, it's exactly

what you think.

- This may be

your worst plan ever.

- Please, her parents own

a private jet.

- Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Private jet?

Can we skydive out of it?

- I guess.

- [British accent]

'Ello, 'ello, I'm Danielle,

and everything's

going to be jolly good!

- Yes.

Yes, it is, Private Jet.

- Danielle.

- Danielle.

[upbeat rock music]

♪ ♪

- I'm super psyched

we're doing this, Mae!

Can you believe we're gonna

jump out of a plane?

- No, I cannot!

- I mean, are we crazy or what?

- I'm definitely

going with crazy!

- Okay, we're approaching

the drop zone!

The instructor's

in the cockpit,

and auditioned girls to play

the part of my new best friend?

- Okay, it's exactly

what you think.

- This may be

your worst plan ever.

- Please, her parents own

a private jet.

- Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Private jet?

Can we skydive out of it?

- I guess.

- [British accent]

'Ello, 'ello, I'm Danielle,

and everything's

going to be jolly good!

- Yes.

Yes, it is, Private Jet.

- Danielle.

- Danielle.

[upbeat rock music]

♪ ♪

- I'm super psyched

we're doing this, Mae!

Can you believe we're gonna

jump out of a plane?

- No, I cannot!

- I mean, are we crazy or what?

- I'm definitely

going with crazy!

- Okay, we're approaching

the drop zone!

The instructor's

in the cockpit,

and auditioned girls to play

the part of my new best friend?

- Okay, it's exactly

what you think.

- This may be

your worst plan ever.

- Please, her parents own

a private jet.

- Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Private jet?

Can we skydive out of it?

- I guess.

- [British accent]

'Ello, 'ello, I'm Danielle,

and everything's

going to be jolly good!

- Yes.

Yes, it is, Private Jet.

- Danielle.

- Danielle.

[upbeat rock music]

♪ ♪

- I'm super psyched

we're doing this, Mae!

Can you believe we're gonna

jump out of a plane?

- No, I cannot!

- I mean, are we crazy or what?

- I'm definitely

going with crazy!

- Okay, we're approaching

the drop zone!

The instructor's

in the cockpit,

and auditioned girls to play

the part of my new best friend?

- Okay, it's exactly

what you think.

- This may be

your worst plan ever.

- Please, her parents own

a private jet.

- Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Private jet?

Can we skydive out of it?

- I guess.

- [British accent]

'Ello, 'ello, I'm Danielle,

and everything's

going to be jolly good!

- Yes.

Yes, it is, Private Jet.

- Danielle.

- Danielle.

[upbeat rock music]

♪ ♪

- I'm super psyched

we're doing this, Mae!

Can you believe we're gonna

jump out of a plane?

- No, I cannot!

- I mean, are we crazy or what?

- I'm definitely

going with crazy!

- Okay, we're approaching

the drop zone!

The instructor's

in the cockpit,

and auditioned girls to play

the part of my new best friend?

- Okay, it's exactly

what you think.

- This may be

your worst plan ever.

- Please, her parents own

a private jet.

- Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Private jet?

Can we skydive out of it?

- I guess.

- [British accent]

'Ello, 'ello, I'm Danielle,

and everything's