– “ONE DAY IN A LIFE” –

– Sorry.
– What’s wrong?

I came.

You were overdue!

Coffee, please.

Thanks.

Thanks.

Enough, let’s stop here.
I can’t go any farther.

You can do it, we’re almost there.

– Whatever, you go on.
– Here is fine.

The nudist beach
is 50 meters away!

– Why? You want to go naked?
– No.

– Anyway they’re mostly gay here!
– Good, they won’t pester us.

– Here.
– Here?

Yeah, come on.

Here’ll be fine.

Here.

– Where’s the professor?
– He’s coming, he’s on the phone.

I’d like to know where you pick up
some of these guys.

I don’t pick up anyone.
He was the one who insisted on coming.

If you insist!
He seems like a creep to me.

You seemed to really like him. You did
nothing but talk to him in the car!

– Daniela, you want to give us a hand?
– Sure, I’m coming.

– Have you thought about that idea?
– What idea?

– Putting a cat on the cover
of the next issue. – As if!

Once and for all, I’ve just graduated
and, okay, I have to pay my dues,

but if I have to be in the office
just to answer the phone...

– Guys, there’s a flasher.
– Where?

Come on, he’s a nudist!
Hey, excuse me!

– What are you doing? Cut it out!
– He could give us a hand.

Hello, pardon me, can you help us?

Thanks.

We were getting stuck.

– How do you want them set up?
– Next to each other.

– Don’t you use the handle?
– No, I’ll stick that in later.

Well, anyway, I’m Stella.

– Salvatore, nice to meet you.
– Nice to meet you.

That’s Eva.

– Hi. A pleasure.
– Hi.

We work at a magazine. She’s
the editor; I’m the slave Isaura.

I’d like to know why you say things.
You get on my nerves!

– So, what do you do?
– I’m a policeman.

– No way! Really?
– Really.

Fancy that!

– Do you come here often?
– Once in a while.

– And you always come to this area?
– No, over there, too.

We also usually go further on.
But today we decided to stay here.

We hope they’re not all gay.

There, that’s one.

– Here you are.
– Thanks. – Not at all.

– What is this stuff?
– Gin and tonic. Don’t you like it?

No, I thought it was water.

Well...

Wait...

Now, not even a tsunami
will carry this away.

What are you doing? Stop!

Stop!

– Let me go!
– Let go of the bag!

– You’re mistaken, it was a joke.
– Half-wit!

– You know him?
– Yes, he’s a friend of Stella’s.

– Who is this fool?
– Careful what you say!

– You got me dirty, you oaf!
– Calm down, calm down!

– Are you crazy? He’s our friend,
you know? – Fuck off!

What have you done?
You beat up Raffaele?

Careful, he’s an important professor,
he knows a bunch of people.

– He can send you to jail.
– Just let him try!

I’d like to know
what you had to shout about.

It’s not as if you had millions
in your bag!

– I told you, I was scared.
– Of what?

– Sometimes I think you’re mad!
– Don’t be offensive, come on!

Anyway, he’s right,
it was Raffaele’s fault.

He’s 50 years old
and he acts like a kid.

Ay, ay!

The umbrella has fallen over as well.
Let’s have the lido give us one.

Hi.

– Remember me?
– Ah, yeah.

– Who knows what you thought, earlier.
What did you think? – Nothing.

– Do you come here often?
– No.

What do you do?

– I’m a policeman.
– No way, really?

I’m a waiter.

Let’s go back.

Why didn’t you want to kiss me
earlier? Don’t you like me?

I only kiss when I love someone.

– Are you attracted to him?
– He looks like someone I know.

Yeah, right!

I’m going over there.
I’ll see you later, if you like.

Okay. Bye.

– There you are. I didn’t see you
around anymore. – I ran into a friend.

A beer, please.

Sorry about before,
I’m truly mortified.

It wasn’t your fault.
It was that guy.

I kind of lost my head, too. I’m so
fond of this bag, it’s my mother’s.

– What’s it made of?
– Python.

Python is coming back
into fashion you know!

Cute, isn’t it? She wasn’t using
it anymore, so I took it.

It even had a strap,
but it broke earlier. Darn it!

I’m sorry.

Anyway, I’m Daniela.

– Salvatore, nice to meet you.
– A pleasure.

I don’t think you can be here
without a suit.

– In fact, I put mine on.
– I saw that.

Why did you sit with all the nudists,
if you’re all going to wear suits?

I didn’t know
it was a nudist beach.

And anyway, this isn’t a suit,
it’s a coloured bra.

– It looks like a suit.
– No, it’s a bra.

– I’m going back to my towel.
– Okay, let’s go.

– Are you from Naples?
– Yeah.

– Naples, city?
– No, from Volla. It’s nearby.

– You?
– Falconara.

I’m here for a civil service exam
with the Foreign Affairs Ministry.

I’m staying with Eva,
the one with dark, dark hair.

This beach is beautiful, isn’t it?
I’d never been here before.

– But how do you northerners live?
– Hey, we have the sea, near us.

Rimini, the celebrated
Adriatic Riviera!

But I rarely go

because it’s filled with lidos,
families, children screaming.

– Here, instead, we have transsexuals.
– What do they do to you?

They scream as well.

Are you crazy?
There are trash cans!

You’re right, I know.
But sometimes I forget.

– Lost in thought?
– No, why?

Huh, whatever.

How long are you staying in Rome?

Until Tuesday. Then I’ll leave,
or Eva will kick me out.

I don’t think she’s that happy
having me there.

Obviously, she lives alone,
she has her routine.

Anyway, we don’t see each other much,
because I almost never come to Rome.

Listen, I’m going to go
stretch out on my towel.

Later, if you want to stop by,
we also have hot cappuccino.

– Okay, thanks.
– Okay. Then I’ll return to base camp.

Cute! What’re you doing,
reading Mickey Mouse?

– Will you forgive us?
– No, thanks.

I’m sorry
you quarrelled with Raffaele.

He’s not a bad guy.
He’s just a little childish.

We met him yesterday at a party.
He seemed nice and I invited him.

We came here in his car.

Then I discovered
he’s one of my father’s patients.

– I want to take a walk.
– Okay, I’ll walk with you for a bit.

You see the mosquito net we put up?
The beach umbrella you put up fell.

– Moron!
– Sorry.

It’s a strange coincidence, isn’t it?

– What is? – Raffaele
being one of my father’s patients.

Well, my father has
loads of patients. So...

He’s a homeopathic doctor, you know?
He has a very large practice.

It’s just that, now, he’s in a coma,
he had a cerebral haemorrhage.

– I’m sorry.
– But the doctors are optimistic.

All right, I understand.
You want to be alone a while, right?

When you head back, stop by.
So, maybe, you and Raffaele make up.

– Bye.
– Bye.

Yes, you see? There, perfect.

No...

– I’m so disgusting, I’m obese.
– Come on, don’t go overboard.

Listen, have I...

– Have I grown fatter?
– No, absolutely not!

Seriously. From the last time we
saw each other, have I put on weight?

Not especially, you’re a little
swollen. You need a sauna.

You remember that time
in Morocco, in the Turkish baths,

when the fat woman slipped
and landed on Paola? – Yes!

– And she flung her to the floor!
– My goodness, what a fuss!

– What of Paola?
– I can’t bear her anymore.

Since she had her little boy,
I can’t stand her.

– Why? – All that exists is her with
the baby, she talks of nothing else.

How did the fat lady
come to mind just now?

– It’s all settled.
– What’s all settled?

– He said he’d stop by later.
– Who? That guy?

Thank goodness you told me,
so I can go to the bar.

See how you are? I try to resolve
conflicts and what do you do?

Toss water on the fire!

You do say “toss water on the fire,”
I’ve heard it lots of times.

– In this case, it’s wrong.
– Want to bet?

Cristiano, come here a sec.

– What is it? – Is it true you say
“toss water on the fire”?

– Of course. Why?
– Then you’re an idiot!

“Toss water on the fire”
means to extinguish it.

– “Idiot” you can say to your sister.
– Be nice, don’t quarrel. Goodness!

She’s been hysterical since the mix–up
with that guy this morning.

Him?
We looked at each other before.

So he’s gay!

How silly you are!
You got beat up by a gay guy!

He’s not gay.
He’s too macho.

– If he looked at him...
– I’m really not sure.

Anyway, he looked at me
in a slightly strange way.

– Excuse me!
– No, come on! Stella!

Salvatore, could you come here
for a second?

– So you do it on purpose!
– Stella!

I wanted to introduce you
to Cristiano.

– Hi.
– Hi, pleased to meet you.

– He was really keen to meet you.
– Take no notice, it’s not true.

So you mean you don’t like him?

Listen, would you like
a nice frothy cappuccino?

Thanks.

– Sorry. Stella is an idiot
sometimes – Well, she’s young.

– Are you from Naples?
– Yeah.

– You?
– From Florence.

– Here you are.
– Thanks.

Come in, make yourselves at home.

Salvatore, you remember Eva?

Okay guys, get ready now
because we’re doing a quiz.

– What quiz?
– Be good, I’ll explain.

– Can I do it? – This quiz will
help you understand who you are

and which strategies you should adopt
to seduce your ideal man.

Or your ideal woman.
Depending on the case.

Imagine you have landed
on another planet with the Shuttle.

You are wearing a spacesuit

and you’re getting ready
to go out for some exploration.

The temperature is just right.

The air is breathable
and cleaner than on Earth.

The planet’s inhabitants have
ball–shaped eyes, antennas and scales.

They don’t seem aggressive, but they
watch you with distrust. What to do?

– Salvatore, are you listening to me?
– Yes.

– Understand what you have to do?
– I have to land with the Shuttle.

No! You’ve already landed.
You have to decide what to do.

But don’t get distracted,
or it will be pointless!

So then: A.

Quickly close the hatch
and call Alpha base.

The voice–mail says it is mid–August
holiday and they re–open in September.

You decide to wait, since you have
a PlayStation and lots of Nutella.

– I’ll choose that.
– Wait, there are three.

B: Wave a greeting to the aliens,
opening and closing your hand,

as commonly done
by the inhabitants of Earth.

Then you ask the tallest one,
in English, “You speak Italian? “

– What nonsense!
– Please, don’t interrupt!

– Wipe the creatures out with your
laser weapon and colonize the planet.

You build a villa on a sea cliff
and organize an intergalactic orgy.

– I choose that.
– Yeah, I can really picture you!

– Why? – Before you organize an orgy,
I’ll be married and divorced.

In my opinion, she’d be very capable.
She looks respectable, but underneath...

– Imagine! I’ve known her 10 years!
– You know absolutely nothing at all.

– So, Eva, which do you choose?
– The first.

– Well, Eva...
– I choose C.

Yes, I got it. And you?

I don’t know.

– You?
– Dunno!

I’d wave.

– We’ll wave.
– Good! I’d greet them, too.

Okay, the answers. Eva.

Wait on deck.

Cannon fire and boarding parties
are not part of your repertoire.

You’d better develop patience,
sooner or later help will arrive.

– Take that!
– And me?

– What did you choose?
– C. Excuse me for existing.

– Yeah. So, jump in without hesitation.
– Yes, in the bin.

One of your winning weapons
is a certain rapidity of action.

Let yourself be guided by instinct
and leap to seize your prey.

Whoever it is,
he’ll have no way out.

Now for the best part: B.

Don’t rely on your sex appeal.

Don’t play the vamp, if you’re a woman,
or be macho, if you’re a man,

since no one would believe you.
– Indeed...

What you are looking for
is just affection and protection.

It’s best to make yourself understood
with a glance and a friendly smile.

In my opinion, these quizzes
are only relevant if you’re straight.

If you’re gay,
how do you identify?

– It’s true, I hadn’t considered that.
– Don’t talk nonsense!

Think about it, it’s true.
It’s a kind of discrimination.

If they were serious, they would have
questions for gays and lesbians.

– And maybe for foot–fetishists, too!
– Well, yes!

Each one has a different psychology
depending on their sexual orientation.

– Don’t you think?
– Hey, what do I know?

– What? You’re gay!
– Sorry, who told you that?

– Nobody, I figured it out for myself.
– Ah! And how did you do that?

– Dunno, you can tell.
– You can tell?

No, don’t pay any attention.
You can’t tell. Right?

I really hadn’t noticed.

Anyway, don’t worry about it,
it’s the year 2000!

Hello?

Yes, yes.

Yes, yes, doctor...

The appointment on Tuesday?

Well, yes, a bit.

– Salvatore, you’re not offended,
are you? – No. By what?

– Raffaele, want to take a quiz?
– No, thanks.

Then roll a joint
and lower the mosquito net.

Who is it that keeps calling you?

My mother.

– I’ve got one ready, if you want.
– Thanks. If I wait for that guy...

Hey guys, I’m going swimming.

Cristiano, there’s gin and tonic
in the thermos, if you want some.

Do you live in Rome?
I’ve never seen you around.

Yeah, I’ve lived here for 10 years.

– And you?
– Me, too.

– But I’m often in Florence.
– To visit your parents?

Them too.

You feel like a walk?

– Where to?
– That way.

All right.

– Can I leave you my wallet?
– Sure!

Thanks.

See ya.

See ya.

– You remind me so much of somebody.
– Oh, yeah?

I hope he’s good–looking.

I want you to hear a song,
it’s really fabulous.

– Did you come by car?
– Yeah. You?

With friends.

If he doesn’t call you by today...

Do you mind if we go back?

– Why?
– There’s a woman I don’t want to see.

– Who? That one?
– Yeah.

Okay.

What do you do?

I’m a policeman.

– No way, really?
– Really.

Well then, you ought to arrest me,
I smoked a joint earlier.

No. It was for personal use,
I can’t arrest you.

What a shame!

– So what do you do?
– I’m an actor.

– Come on, really?
– Really.

– Where? On television?
– Sure.

And also in the theater.

– Congratulations.
– Thanks.

But you know how it is,
now is a slow period.

In Italy, you only work
if you know somebody.

And you don’t know anyone?

Hmm... A few people.

For instance, at a party yesterday
I met Ozpetek.

– Osbetek? – No, Ozpetek!
The one from “Facing Windows.”

He’s really nice.
And he’s also a good–looking man.

1469, Ferdinand, King of Aragon
and Isabella of Castile are married.

1474, Henry IV dies and Isabella
becomes Queen of Castile.

– 1400... – She’ll be as red
as a pepper by this evening.

But where is it?
Damn it!

– You speak Neapolitan?
– A bit.

A guy taught me.
I make lots of simple past mistakes.

Like “andette in discoteca”...

– “lette.”
– Exactly.

I was once stopped by a policeman.

– Yeah?
– Yeah.

– What for?
– I was in a car with a guy.

He stopped us but didn’t say anything,
he just looked at our IDs.

– Do you think we have records?
– I don’t know.

– What were you doing?
– A blowjob.

Then you were lucky.

– Yeah, I was?
– Yeah.

Here it is, I found it. Here.

It’s beautiful, listen. Wait.

There he is! Finally!

We’ve been looking for you
for an hour.

Sorry. But Stella’s over there
and this is a friend of hers.

– His name is...
– Salvatore.

Wow! You don’t even
remember his name.

– Hi, Massimiliano.
– Nice to meet you.

– Having a long stroll, aren’t you?
– Why? We only walked down to there.

– I thought you got lost behind
the dunes. – You know I don’t go there.

Yeah, yeah...

Stella asked if we could
stop by later.

I’m leaving in a little while.
I’m getting bored.

Right.
I’m going to take a shower.

You coming with me?

If you get lost, call my cell!

– Who are those guys? – Massimiliano
is a colleague. The other’s Francesco.

Come here.

Listen...

– I have to go back to my friends.
– Oh, all right.

See you later.

Bye.

Salvatore!

Salvatore!

– Your wallet.
– Jeez, thank you!

– I saw you were leaving...
– Sorry you had to run like that.

No problem.

– Some water?
– No, thanks.

– How come you’re leaving so early?
– I’m doing something.

What a shame!
This is the best time of day.

– Have you eaten anything?
– No.

– I’ll get you something from the bar.
– You said you were leaving.

Well, ten minutes
makes no difference.

All right, I accept.

Has something happened?

You saw that young guy, Cristiano?

– Before, at the showers he kissed me.
– So, you like guys, right. Don’t you?

– Yeah.
– And so? Don’t you like him?

That’s not it.

He looks like Pino when he was 20.

– What did you say?
– He looks like my boyfriend.

– What’ll you have?
– Fruit salad.

There you are!
I’ve been looking for you for an hour.

Raffaele asked if we wanted to eat
here this evening. How about it?

– As long as we’re not too late.
– So, I’ll reserve a table for four?

Salvatore, I’m going to the restroom.

A fruit salad, please.

– And, so, that thing with the tickle,
how do they say that? – Tickling.

That’s right.

Are you ticklish?

A little.

– Thanks.
– Done.

Thanks. Shall we sit down?

Let’s go back to the beach.

– Well, how about staying for dinner?
– No, thank you.

– I really can’t stand that guy.
– Who, Raffaele?

He rubbed me the wrong way, too,
at first, but he’s not a bad guy.

– As well as a very well–read man.
Do you want some? – No, thanks.

Anyway, in my opinion,
you should go with your instincts.

– What do you mean?
– About that young guy, right?

– You should do what you feel like.
– Yeah, but it’s not easy.

And anyway, you’re not familiar
with my situation.

– Want a bologna sandwich?
Eva’s on a diet. – Okay.

Thanks.

Are you involved?

I had a long relationship,
but it’s over.

– Who was he?
– He still is, he’s not dead!

Anyway, he’s a guy who works
at the Internal Revenue Service.

– So what does your boyfriend do?
– He’s an elementary teacher.

– How nice! – Yes, but you work hard
and you earn little.

– And Cristiano?
– He’s over there.

– Why don’t you open this all up?
– It’s too hot. Anyway, I was asleep.

– I even had a strange dream.
– Oh, yeah? About what?

I was in a forest
and looking for mushrooms with my dad.

But it was hot
and he wasn’t able to walk.

So I said to him,
“Undress, that way you’ll be cooler.”

But he didn’t want to, because naked,
people would see that he was ill.

He said,
“You undress, you who are beautiful.”

But I was embarrassed
and I didn’t know what to do.

Then he gave me
the sweetest smile,

like those he would give me
when I was little.

Then he gave me a caress as well.
You don’t know how beautiful it was!

What do you think it means?

I don’t think that dreams
have any precise meaning.

We are the ones who have the need
to give our dreams some meaning.

I don’t get it.

I think where I’m not,
therefore I am where I do not think.

– What does that mean?
– It’s a theory by Lacan.

For him, the true structure
of the individual is the unconscious.

While the rational part, the id,
is just an imaginary subject.

He even calls it
“the mental illness of man.”

– That’s nonsense to me. – We are
talking about Lacan, not some novice.

I’ve often had an opportunity
to interpret my dreams.

Let’s hear it.

For instance, a while back
I happened to have a dream

where I found my analyst on the
toilet seat. – And what did you feel?

Well...

At first, I was flattered
that he had chosen my bathroom.

But since he was broad–hipped,
he had gotten stuck.

So I was trying
to pull him up by the elbows,

but the more I pulled,
the more stuck he became.

It was a really agonizing situation.

Then he said,
“We’re not getting out of here.”

“Try pulling the chain
and let’s see what happens.”

– And you?
– I pulled. What could I do?

He went down like a turd.

How long have you been in analysis?

– Ten years.
– Is he Freudian or Jungian?

He’s Jungian.

I had a very dear friend
in treatment with a Jungian analyst.

– I think she stayed about
ten years as well. – Oh, yeah?

– How is she now? – Great.
She goes out with a guy of mixed–race.

– What a moron! – It’s true!
He’s Cuban, his name is Rafael Moreno.

No way, I don’t believe it!

What rubbish you talk.
I told you about my dreams,

and you...

The hand...

The hand...

Coffee?

Sure, thanks.

– Enough, enough.
Is there sugar in it? – Yes!

Good.

– Where should we put it?
– Give it to me.

You want me
to put some cream on you?

If you feel like it...

– Have you been together long?
– What?

You and your boyfriend.

Ten years.

Do you live together?

Before. Not now.

How come?

He left, he’s in Canada.

– Is he coming back?
– No, he won’t be coming back.

Here’s Cristiano!

– Salvatore! Are you leaving?
– Yeah.

No! Come on, stay a while longer.

I found that song, you know?
I’ll let you hear it later.

Come on!

Really. Come on!

– Do you have room for us?
– Sure, come on in!

– Remember Massimiliano? – I don’t
think so. It’s a pleasure, I’m Stella.

Hi, pleased to meet you.

Guys, sit down.

Can I offer you something to drink?
Tea, coffee, me?

– Staying for the party tonight?
– Sure, sweetie, that’s why we came!

Could you give us a lift?
We’re now on foot!

Only if you’ll stay until late.

– I guess so.
– Whore.

It’s all his fault, as always.
I told you to take two cars!

It’s not my fault, not at all.
Francesco’s changed his mind.

These open couples
are all a joke.

Pay no attention, Francesco and I
have a really open relationship.

Yeah, yeah.
So why did he get angry?

– You know darn well, because he
didn’t even notice him – Yeah, yeah.

– Is it true you didn’t notice him?
– Go fuck yourself!

What did I say? Excuse me.

Salvatore!

– Are you angry?
– No, why?

– Because you told me to fuck off!
– I had my reasons.

– Which are? – What do you want
from me? You have a boyfriend!

– You think I’m a whore? – I don’t
let anyone take me for a ride.

– I’m not deceiving you, I really
do like you! – I’m a bit nervous!

– Do you want me to go?
– I don’t know.

– How about giving us a lift to Rome?
– Who?

– Me and Massimiliano.
– No.

You’re a real asshole. I stayed
for you. Now how will we get back?

What the fuck do I care
about your friend?

Who, Massimiliano?
He wanted a three–way, you know?

What did I say?
Why do you always get angry?

He said it, not me.
Wait a second, damn it!

Let me be! You make me sick!

– What happened? – What do I know?
Whatever I say pisses him off.

– Who knows what you said!
– You can’t wait to do it with him.

You’re an idiot! When have I ever
said such a thing?

– Then why did you want to stay?
– I wanted a ride.

You pick guys up
and then they leave you stranded!

– You could have gone with Francesco!
– So he can talk my ear off again!

Like before, when we waited
for you for two hours!

Leave Francesco out of it.

Why the hell did you mention
open couples?

What the fuck do you want from me?
All Rome knows that story!

– Mind your own damn business!
– Fuck off! – Guys, calm down!

– You going for a swim?
– I would, but it’s too dirty.

– Farther out it’s cleaner.
– The problem is getting there.

Look.

This is Pino.

– He doesn’t look much like Cristiano.
– Look at this one.

More here!

– How old is he?
– 50.

I couldn’t go to the funeral,
his parents didn’t want me there.

And since there’s no will,
they’re throwing me out of the house.

Can’t you do anything?

Come on, come in swimming!

– Come on, let’s go swimming.
– You go. I’ll go study.

– You said you wanted to!
– I’ll catch up with you later.

Hey, come in! It’s fantastic!

Salvatore, see what a great
sand castle Lello and I made?

Anyway, I’m sorry
you quarrelled with Cristiano.

I didn’t quarrel at all.
He’s the one who behaved badly.

But you treated him like shit.
Come on, go apologize to him.

– Me? For what? – He told me
you treated him really badly.

– I did not!
– He was even crying.

What happened to your friend?

Who gives a shit!

How long have you been going out?

Almost three months,
but I’m leaving him now. I’ve decided.

– Oh, yeah? Why?
– Because you don’t do that.

He left me here like an asshole.

I would have done the same thing,
in his place.

It’s clear you’re an asshole as well.

A lot.

Massimiliano says I’m selfish.

But, excuse me,
if I wanted to be with you,

why should I give that up?

Maybe so you wouldn’t upset
your boyfriend.

He shouldn’t get so upset!
I don’t take anything away from him.

If I saw that my partner
wanted to screw some other guy,

I’d beat him senseless.

Apart from the fact that this
open relationship idea was his.

Anyway, he was wrong.

If the person you love is doing well,
you should just be happy.

That’s real love, for me.

– Can I smoke a joint?
– You’re asking for my permission?

What do I know!
You always get angry.

– You want to smoke?
– Yeah, thanks.

This evening, I’d like to have
a nice seafood appetizer.

Then spaghetti with clams.

– Or rather, with shellfish.
Do you think they have that? – Sure.

I want to see if they make a swordfish
carpaccio. It’s been a long time.

What are you having?

I saw that they have
trofie alla siciliana,

and then roast sea bass.

– Stella...
– Weed or hash?

Weed.

This certainly is the best time
to be at the beach.

If you’re free, we could think about
returning next Saturday. How about it?

I’d gladly have a toke.

Does your wife know you smoke?

June is the most beautiful
month of the year.

The days are extraordinarily long.

You have the whole summer
before you.

It reminds me of certain afternoons
spent at the beach,

my sister and I, like today.

My mother would make potato pizza.

God, how good that pizza was!

Forget roast sea bass.

– Thank you.
– Not at all.

– Do you like it?
– Well enough.

You know when I play this music?

When I feel alone.

There are so many things
that I have inside and I need to...

draw them out.

Have you ever had
a long relationship?

Yes.

What does that mean,
to you, having a relationship?

That you love only him.

And don’t you get bored?

Then I’m not suited
to having a relationship.

It’s obvious that you haven’t
found the right person yet.

How do you know when
you’ve found the right person?

Daniela!

– What happened?
– I don’t know; she must have fainted!

– Help me.
– Let’s pull her up.

Yes, hold on. Good grief!

– Daniela, can you hear me? Answer me.
– What happened?

– Nothing. I think you fainted.
– You gave us a shock.

Imagine that!
The only one who didn’t smoke fainted!

I told you that
you should go into the shade!

– Has it passed?
– It’s passed, yeah.

Let’s try to pull her up, hold on.

Goodness me! Sorry.

It’s nothing, I’m fine.
Go on, go on.

– What “it’s nothing”? Are you sure?
– Yeah, absolutely certain.

– I’m not unconcerned, forgive me.
– I’ll keep her company.

You go, too.
I’ll go back to studying.

Enough of these books!
I’ll write you a note for the exam!

You go as well,
or I’ll feel guilty.

– Do you want to throw me out?
– No, I’m thinking of you!

I want to be here!

But I don’t want to keep still.

– So let’s walk.
– Okay.

– Where to?
– That way.

– Over there?
– Yeah.

– Are you sure?
– Certain.

Where are you going?

For a stroll.

Behind the dunes?

– If you want to go to him,
it’s not a problem. – No worries.

– Lovely, isn’t it?
– Yes.

Why are you always carrying
that bag around?

Because I have some breakable
things inside.

What things?

– I want to tell you something.
– What?

I’m HIV positive.

No one knows, except for my family.

That’s why I was scared this morning,
when Raffaele grabbed my bag.

I have some medicines in it.

– Do you often faint?
– No.

– Earlier, I was faking it.
– Why?

Because I wanted
to attract your attention.

Are you angry?

No.

– Shall we go this way?
– Sure.

Can you hold this for a second?

– At any rate, I also told you a fib.
– What was it?

– It’s not true that I’m a policeman.
– It isn’t?

– I’m a florist.
– No way!

– Why didn’t you tell me?
– Dunno.

I’ll let you discover
the charm of the dunes.

Come along, young lady,
the entry is this way.

Here’s the big thicket,
“fratta maggiore,”

not to be confused
with Aunt Luisa’s town.

Aunt Luisa wouldn’t come here
even with an escort.

Strange people come here,
in search of...

You see one there.

Go on! Go away!

This way is the gorgeous
lido at Torvajanica,

destination of tourists from all
parts of the world. – Really?

Are you joking? Even the Chinese
come to Torvajanica beach!

– How did you get it?
– It was my boyfriend.

– A drug addict?
– No, an asshole.

– To think that we were together
for 10 years! – Jeez!

You can never trust anyone, at all!
I’m really careful, however...

Well, it’s different now,
there are medicines.

Yeah, but if you take them,
you’ll take them your entire life.

– How long have you been taking them?
– I don’t take them.

My doctor said I don’t need them.
These are homeopathic.

– What do you use them for?
– Because I frequently get headaches.

– Do you have regular
bowel movements? – What?

Sorry, it’s a private thing.

– Nonetheless, I am regular.
– Good, that’s a good sign.

– From that, they see how you’re doing.
– Exactly, I’m in deep shit!

Want to see something strange?

Look.

Oh, bravo!

– How did you learn to do that?
– I took gymnastics.

I even competed at nationals,
and came in 58th.

– Among 200 that’s not too shabby.
– Well.

Good God, one time I saw
this totally absurd incident.

– What did you see? – A man and woman,
around 60 years old, distinguished.

They had their arms around each other.
You saw they were in love, so sweet.

I saw a guy I liked over there
so I went that way.

When I headed back I saw
there were 3 or 4 men standing around.

One had dark skin.
I took the long way round,

because I don’t like certain
situations. Know what I mean? – Yeah.

Then I thought that perhaps
the woman had felt unwell

or that maybe those 4
had evil intentions.

So I went up there,
to see what was happening.

You’ll never believe what I saw!

– What did you see?
– No, I can’t tell you.

– I won’t get embarrassed.
– I can’t.

– Come on! – You’re all red,
let’s go back to the beach umbrella.

– Come on, tell me.
– No, I can’t.

– Hey, there’s no one left!
– There’s nobody left!

– So? You going to tell me
what you saw? – I can’t.

– Come on!
– I can’t.

– Give, I’m getting annoyed!
– I can’t! I can’t!

– Tell me! Tell me!
– All right, I’ll tell you.

The old woman...

– The fish!
– Really funny!

It’s been 2 years
since I made love to anyone.

Why not?
If you wear a condom...

That’s not it; I’m inhibited.

And anyway, males never want
to put on a condom!

I always use one.

I don’t know how to exist
without sex.

Turn around, I have to pee.

Turn around.

– You done?
– Wait a second!

– You done?
– Don’t stress me out.

Done.

– Let’s get out, I’m freezing.
– Yes, ma’am.

Isn’t that our stuff?

What did they do?
Leave everything and take off?

Is it a note?

For Daniela: We looked for you
everywhere without finding you.

Stella’s father has died.

We’ll go back to Rome with her. I took
everything. See you tonight, Eva.

Here, it’s for you:
Cristiano’s telephone numbers.

This morning, on my way to the beach,
I saw a broom plant among the dunes.

– It reminded me of something.
– What?

A poem that Pino recited to me.

But I can’t remember
who wrote it.

– Leopardi.
– Well done!

Good God, I’ve been trying
to remember that all day!

“Here on the arid slope of Vesuvius,
formidable mountain, the destroyer.”

Incredible, bravo!
How we laughed at that “Vesevo.”

I said, “What’s with Vesevo,
it’s called Vesuvius! “

The poem is beautiful, when
it talks of Capri, of Mergellina...

Yeah. I remember just the beginning,
then it’s a little difficult.

It means that...

these people, who thought
they were who knows what,

just needed to help each other
and stay united, instead,

since earthquakes come
and destroy everything.

If Pino hadn’t explained it,
who knows what I’d have grasped.

He was remarkable.

He would sit nearby
and do different things.

How good he was!

“The professor”, I called him.

He had a brain this big.

Salvatore...

Excuse the outburst.

Let’s take a walk?

When did you say you were leaving?

On Tuesday.

You’ll have to give me your number,
I’ll come visit you.

Hold on.
Not without a condom.

Wait, wait.

– What is it?
– I’m about to come.

– Come.
– Come?

– You all right?
– Yeah.

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