Original subtitles

Marriages between hans and manchus are strictly forbidden. It's a death penalty

I heard you get married with a han

yes

and you, as the coach of the eight banners army,

dared to violate the law

yes sir

ah hsiung!

Since you're a national hero

I'll let you off if you kill your wife

Ah hsiung

you reluctant?

Execute

Ian!

Kao! You're going too far!

Sorcerer, I...

I feel sorry for you both

all your clans will be executed because of your personal offence

give yourself up! My friend

I'll ask the lord to be lenient

I want his whole family exterminated as a warning for the rest

sorry it was an imperial decree

Come on!

Kao's a traitor!

Don't let him escape!

Master kao!

Around him!

Let go of the prince!

Go away if you want him alive!

Move!

Clear out of my way

Make way!

I'll kill him if you give chase

kao has abducted the prince

lord shu wants kao dead

bring the prince back alive

Forgive me, prince, you can go now

Can I borrow a light?

I go first

you love to be the first for everything, why don't you go to hell first?

Shut up and go to hell, glory to be with me

go to bell!

Rice?

Master's favourite wine

have a drink, master?

Why squabble with me all the time?

If you think you're so good

why don't you try breaking the drought?

It's useless to wrangle with me

it's you who squabble with me!

The god of heaven are blinded, who brought calamity to humanity

my rheumatism is back!

Red clouds hanging over the sky

It's humid! No wonder!

It'll rain within two days

keep your eyes open, I'll break the drought

I'm here to pray for rain

I'll get paid if it rains

So

Help me god!

Rain

and money!

Money and rain!

It's rain!

Smells like shit!

Smells good, doesn't it?

Who are you? How dare you?

I'm here to pray for rain, too

what about me then?

You better go to hell!

Round and round you go...

Watch out!

It's nothing

you sure?

Down you go!

I'll survive

May I borrow your sword

You're ruining my chances of getting rich

You look agitated.

Might I borrow a light?

You're brought drought

and pain to our people

start raining! Or else the hell is waiting for you

you ignore me! Just wait and see

It will never rain with thousand miles of blue sky

the super dragon surging clouds and winds

god be with me. The super dragon

It's coming. I better get ready

Gods behave like human-being

Give the people back what you're taken from them

Pick them up!

They're yours

It's already dead

it sure rains hard

business was brisk because of the heavy rain

someone was executed

because of offence against the marriage laws

hans and manchus

should not be segregated

I've forgotten about your wine

I'll go to get it!

Make way! Are you blind?

Come back!

Do you know who I am?

I'm the army's chief kung fu instructor!

Come back!

It's too heavy!

Wake up!

Dinner time!

I'll get you a towel

Wash up!

Come on, eat!

I've already known how to use the sword skillfully

will you teach me something else?

What for?

I want to be

a kung fu instructor

so I can afford

to buy you more good wine

damn it! Messed up the favourite dishes

Don't be afraid

who are you?

I live with him

The prince!

You're...

I'm your ancestor

Watch out!

Report this to the sorcerer

are you alright?

I'm okay. Let's leave quickly

let's go

Why do they

want to kill you?

How do you feel?

My eyes hurt

How many fingers are there?

Four

no, , there are five toes

I'll be alright.

You better leave

I'll work something out for you

wait for me. I'll be back

Where can I get some medicine at night?

My medicine can cure all

providing I've got the right patient

The sound of a waterfall!?

Was it an illusion?

Dry yourself!

Don't catch cold

No thanks

You're here

Where can you hide?

What's that?

It's a chicken!

A Turkey?

Fire! Help!

You thief! How dare you?

There's a fire!

Serve you right!

What do you intend to steal?

I was looking for medicine,

you old devil!

Me? An old devil?

Not you! The other one!

Right,

she's much more than that!

You're different, still look young!

Oh yes?

In spite of a big barrel waist

too true!

Excellent kung fu!

Very well said

even tiger are afraid of you

I like honest person

such as you

I'm going to feed you

I'll make you chicken noodles

The karate chop!

Paper noodles?

Eat it!

How?

I eat this five times a day.

Go on!

You looked doomed.

Beware!

My uncle was blinded

I'm looking for medicine to cure his sight

but you, too, are doomed

can I be saved?

Be righteous! The crisis will disappear

will I die?

Your future is set!

You're destined to meet me tonight

take this for you uncle

come back if you survive

Do you know who you are?

You're my uncle

you're a bastard

I picked you up

in the wilderness

you're kidding!

You can see again! This is great!

I'm not your relative. Go

shut up and leave

we're been together so long.

Don't cast me away

I don't want to see you again

if you're in trouble again

don't count on me to help you

Thanks for looking after the prince

I want to thank you, too

even your best friends. Will betray you if interest goes

you'll never find the prince again

I've seen the prince

He's not. The real prince has

I need your head

as my stepping stone

Now you know why I want to kick you out?

Be careful of your ownself

It's fun!

The seven stars, the symbol of a future king!

You're well-placed, my lord

will you promote me when you become king?

Yes, but I'll promote master kao first

Are you frightened, my lord

I'm a bastard, not a prince

you're a prince just by my single word

I'm your old man

you'll be a prince

if you cooperate

you can

even one day be the king

we can then rule the world!

I want to kill you

You're too unappreciative, think twice about it

You can

even one day be the king

we can then rule the world

No! He killed my uncle

the stars?!

Go to hell!

It's fun

Don't run around!

It's dangerous!

If you want to live longer

Stop laughing!

What's so funny? Look at your monster face!

Or you look at yourself from your shit

Don't cry! Get out of that urn!

Let me give you a hand

I've tried hard. See you around

I'll shatter it!

Wait! Don't go!

I'm too emotional

Gods and ghost in heaven

and hell take my orders

The sorcerers championship held

every decade at the demon city is coming

all sorcerers will compete

for the supreme command

I'll win it.

Wait and see

let me play a trick on you

all paper butterflies such on my palm

cross the boundary! Come back!

This way! Come here!

Come back!

This way! Come here!

Give me

my paper butterflies!

Or else I won't let you off easily

shut up! They've crossed the border

damn fool!

Even your fingers aren't allowed to cross the border

I'll have my revenge!

I'll never been scared

My eyelids twitching all the day

come back to this side!

You almost dragged me over

come back

This half

is mine!

How do we split?

I'll take his left leg

You've crossed the border

luckily I retreat in time

Jump! Keep on jumping! Don't stop jumping!

Blood! He's dead

I don't care! I only want his body

am I still alive?

Does it hurt?

It sure does

you're still alive then. You've mine

wait!

He belongs to master

because he just knelt

in front of him

he's our younger brother now

right, don't bully him anymore

here are three sacred bowls

lo become one of us, you must choose one of them

what do they stand for?

Poverty means you'll be in the state of being poor

this one means you'll die young

what about solitary?

It means you'll be as lonely as him

none of them sounds good to me

I'm still in mourning

might I have the choice on some other day

he's right

you wash that foot-binding cloth

for me first

no, he should serve me first

me first!

Scissors, hammer, paper!

I let you win

follow me

I should have used hammer

how did he escape?

I was too emotional

it was my fault

a message from lord shu!

I'm glad to hear that you've fulfilled your mission

quickly bring the prince to me

you'll be accordingly rewarded.

You've disappointed me

Stop it! You fool!

How can one survive in an urn?

That's practiced

only by evil sorcerers

they kidnap kids

and corrode their skin

they are kept inside a spectacular urn

and be fed on drug which control their minds

they will grow up in the urns

there are also many itinerant entertainers

who bring along with the Phoenix

& exhibit freaks

that's unhuman

brother's supernatural power is good

it's only child play;

mine are much better

Leave me out! I don't want to fight

It doesn't hurt at all!

I'll strangle you

Sister!

That's my famous vanishing act!

One must be good at impersonating

and a tough training at physical means

the basic principle

is the dexterity of all limbs

can you teach me?

You walk on hands? Are you crippled?

It's the enforcement of my arm-strength

you won't learn any good thing from her

I always start

with the understanding of basic texts

I've never shown

these extraordinary texts

sit down and read it

You bastard, trying to fool me

I used to sit on this favourite chair and study

now pase over to you

sit down and don't disappoint me

you must concentrate

then you

will feel no pain

I'm going to bask in the moonlight

my buttock will bleed till I die

clean up all the places at dawn

what are you looking for?

A rubblish bib

just sweep it over there

how can you do that? It's too immoral

her slide is too dirty,

it makes no difference

do it while she's not around

sweep it!

Why did you do that?

Brother told me to

clean up

all the rubblish

alright, I will clean it

are you crazy? Sweep it back over there!

Again?

Do it!

Alright

stop it at once!

Get on with it!

Stop!

Go on!

Stop it!

Go on!

I said stop it!

Do it!

I said stop it!

Shut up!

Shu Ken!

Shut up!

You two selfish bastards

I've the greatest respect for you two!

But have you any respect to me?

Do you have any consideration

of my feeling?

You two stupid old fools!

Why can't you to up

the chores yourselves?

Well said!

What's so funny?

You always disregard of others

you can put all the blames on me

I'm leaving!

You've driven him away now!

Prince, there's no way out except following me

you've got the nerve!

Rebuild that pole for me

he must compensate for it

pay up! Come on!

Pay up!

My world is slay without compensation

make up your mind, prince

I'm comfortable here

although you two haven't solicited my view,

I've decided to stay

you ought to help me out now

don't interfere

won't interfere, but helping

he looks like the prince?

You can only deceive people but not gods

I'm afraid of none

you two are invincible when you join force

but I'll take you

on one by one

don't let me catch you!

I recognize youl!

You're sister!

How come you're so hairy?

Damn idiot!

You aren't sister!

I'm the face-shaving sister

come! Follow me!

Your sister won't be so hairy

I'm sorry

you've got many wrinkles round you face

I'll make you pretty

alright!

Come over here

What is it?

It's nothing!

I haven't tried that for a long time

Get up and have another round

It's over

I've to put some powder on you

I laugh in the paradise

What happened?

Watch out for the poisonous powder!

Help!

Happiness!

Who changed them into happiness, wealth and longevity

I don't like poverty, short life and solitary

so I substituted them with something better

where are the three sacred bowls?

Beneath sister's bed

you're not supposed to move them

it will bring along

with disaster

really?

Fetch me the bowls

yes

sister!

You should be

with him today

I come to fetch something

why did you hide up

the bowls as treasure?

Don't try to be smart! Give them to me!

What if

I refuse!?

You shouldn't have tampered with them

don't cross the border!

Sister!

Go

To hell!

Wait for your punishment

How can he do a thing like that?

Why breaking into my room?

Don't be angry I come to apologise

it's hard to have you admitting defeat!?

I want to ask you

for a favour

it's too late now

I've never thought you would ask for help

do me a favour and go to hell!

Don't touch anything on the altar again!

It was my first time

That is my first time, too

I'll never do it again

again?

Old spinster!

I've decided to return the bowls

what are you doing here?

To try improving our relationship

you've forgotten where to put the bowls?

Shu Ken will put them back for me

shu Ken, shu Ken

you know

the bowls are ill luck

you want us to suffer bad luck?

It's better you suffer the ill luck!

How can you recognize me

the expression of our eyes is full of evil

so I knew you're sorcerer bat

you two obstruct my plan

I want to kill you both

bring the prince home and fulfil my goal

you cannot change destiny,

you can't extort everything

I can change everything, including destiny

you'll get what you deserve

I'll kill all those who block my way

protect me

What do you think about my third leg?

Come on!

I can't take it anymore!

I'm glad you're taking all the punches

what happened.

I can't hang on any longer

I won't stand a chance without you

let me take him on!

Come get me, if you dare

Thank you

I'll sit and fight with you

I'll sit down, too

Falling down...

He's also good at flying-knife

Brother, be ready

I'll be back!

Let's go to see the old woman

Don't make too many enemies

you'll never get rid of them

none with an enemy will lead a happy life

We often squabble

over small matters

I've crossed the border and entered you room

why do you sleep silently

get up and give me a verbal bashing!

You're a coward!

I'll fulfil what she has wished

Win the supreme command

at the sorcerers championship

The old woman has mentioned

this before she died

you want to win her the command

your kung fu is good and you're smart

but destiny also plays an important part

The sorcerers championship meets every decade

The geteway to hell is opened to public

all the sorcerers are here punctually

to display their wits and occults

as a judge I will be fair

And punish those who break the rules

you must overcome three obstacles

before you can win the supreme command

first, get the key from the boiling oil

such a big pan?

You have time until this joss stick burns out

here is the key

unlock the handcuff and progress to the next obstacle

Begin!

I've got it! Mama!

Mama!

Dive in

and fetch the key for me

boss, is that method sound?

Nothing will stop me

I die before you my boss!

Make way, move!

I've found it!

I'm glad this is not my own hand

The super dragon!

Up

I've touched the boiling oil

Pass!

Pass!

Time's up!

The paper bridge!

Cross the paper bridge by body-segmentation

Come on!

Get on the bridge

wait! Wait!

I'll ride the air and cross the bridge

you dare stepping on me?

That's too slow

the gas is leaking

but you're heading the wrong direction

I'm coming back!

The paper butterflies will help me through

Brother, watch it!

Mean tricks! No wonder you hide your face

Just remain behind these two poles?

The final obstacle! The ceremony!

Joss stick burns deeply in heart

The holy-fire burns away all the sins

it's hot!

The sacred water cleans the dirty body

I'm through

Me? Thanks.

Goodbye!

Just pass in this manner?

I'll leap over

Impoliteness!

I'm ss 0 rry!

Prostration

Go to hell!

Thank you!

Sorcerer bat?

I see that you won't live another second

you dirty bastard! Your end is near!

You dare

to make trouble at the altar?

I'm the supreme, I'll kill anyone in my way!

In the name of all sorcerers,

I'll execute you

and cast you to hell!

That's a close shave!

Spell-binding by nailing shadows

I'll nail you

to the ground!

Lousy marksmanship!

You can't move now, your shadow has been

nailed by my spell-binding knives

don't bluff!

How come I can't move

Prepare to die

I headed off danger of a simple shit

your end is near!

The phantasmagoria

you don't fool me!

Die!

It doesn't hurt!

That's hurt punch

How can I identily him?

The one without shadow must be a phantom

he's the one with the shadow!

I'll the one with shadow!

You must be tired of living

you don't deserve my attention!

You god damned bastard!

The deadly top!

The vanishing act!

I won't die

Don't you know me?

I tell you, I'm the supreme

I'm the supreme!

We've squabbled for many decades

you had never bored me to death

I think vexation is far better than boring to death

you really mean it?

Of course I do

How come you're still alive?

Shut up! You will die first

I fooled you all by feigning dead

sorcerer bat, he

he didn't fool me at all

he didn't have the stink

of our dotard bastard

The smell is different

I fooled him instead!

Give it to me. I told shu Ken to get it

it's mine!

No way! Mine!

Scissors, hammer, paper

I win

bring it over here

you've crossed the border

with the supreme command,

I command you stop quarrelling

that's young hold potentials for greatness