Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:01,349 --> 00:00:04,091
Alright, birthday girl.
One last present.
2
00:00:04,134 --> 00:00:05,788
This one's
from Ikrimah.
3
00:00:05,831 --> 00:00:07,094
Chad:
Oh, lucky.
4
00:00:07,137 --> 00:00:09,009
-Thanks, Ikrimah.
-Thanks, Ikrimah.
5
00:00:09,052 --> 00:00:13,100
-Noise-canceling headphones.
-Canceling headpho-o-o-o-o-nes!
6
00:00:13,143 --> 00:00:14,188
Yes.
7
00:00:14,231 --> 00:00:15,493
[ Chuckles ]
8
00:00:15,537 --> 00:00:17,234
Oh, my God.
So great. So urban.
9
00:00:17,278 --> 00:00:18,540
I love it.
10
00:00:18,583 --> 00:00:21,369
-Okay, Mom, my turn.
-Okay, okay.
11
00:00:21,412 --> 00:00:23,501
I thought it was just
Niki's birthday.
12
00:00:23,545 --> 00:00:24,546
Niki: It is.
13
00:00:24,589 --> 00:00:26,026
We have
this ridiculous ritual
14
00:00:26,069 --> 00:00:28,158
where Chad also gets gifts
on my birthday.
15
00:00:28,202 --> 00:00:29,420
Otherwise,
he throws a tantrum.
16
00:00:29,464 --> 00:00:32,293
It's mostly just
an adorable tradition
17
00:00:32,336 --> 00:00:34,295
we've kept up
that I encourage,
18
00:00:34,338 --> 00:00:37,341
but way -- way to put
a negative spin on it, you dick.
19
00:00:37,385 --> 00:00:39,256
Nope, nope.
We're not doing this today.
20
00:00:39,300 --> 00:00:41,171
Hamid: Okay, Chad joon.
-Here are your presents. -What is it?
21
00:00:41,215 --> 00:00:43,304
[ Bag rustles ]
22
00:00:49,136 --> 00:00:51,442
Just pants?
23
00:00:51,486 --> 00:00:53,444
You guys got me
just straight-up pants?
24
00:00:53,488 --> 00:00:56,273
Hamid and I thought
you could use a new pair.
25
00:00:56,317 --> 00:00:57,622
What?
N-Nothing.
26
00:00:57,666 --> 00:00:59,189
I'll wear it,
but you should --
27
00:00:59,233 --> 00:01:01,713
you should probably know
it just brings me zero joy.
28
00:01:01,757 --> 00:01:02,932
That's all.
29
00:01:02,975 --> 00:01:04,977
But thank you.
Thank you, Hamid. Thank you.
30
00:01:05,021 --> 00:01:06,153
Okay,
what else?
31
00:01:06,196 --> 00:01:09,286
Okay, there is one more
very special gift
32
00:01:09,330 --> 00:01:11,114
all the way from Iran.
33
00:01:11,158 --> 00:01:12,333
Oh,
is it from Dad?
34
00:01:12,376 --> 00:01:13,464
It's from Dad?
My father?
35
00:01:13,508 --> 00:01:16,119
Holy mother of...
36
00:01:16,163 --> 00:01:18,208
what the heck?
37
00:01:18,252 --> 00:01:20,036
What do you think it is,
Mom?
38
00:01:21,342 --> 00:01:26,999
♪
39
00:01:27,043 --> 00:01:28,958
It's a sword.
40
00:01:29,001 --> 00:01:31,178
Oh, my God.
I'm gonna throw up.
41
00:01:31,221 --> 00:01:32,222
It's a sword!
42
00:01:32,266 --> 00:01:35,269
It's a freaking sword,
Mom!
43
00:01:35,312 --> 00:01:36,705
He listened.
Get out of the way.
44
00:01:36,748 --> 00:01:39,360
-Mom, he listened.
-I know, honey. I'm so glad.
45
00:01:39,403 --> 00:01:41,362
I love Dad
so much.
46
00:01:41,405 --> 00:01:42,798
Oh, my God!
47
00:01:42,841 --> 00:01:45,017
Am I allowed to say
"holy shit"?
48
00:01:45,061 --> 00:01:46,236
Holy shit!
49
00:01:46,280 --> 00:01:48,369
This is amazing!
[ Grunts ] Yes!
50
00:01:48,412 --> 00:01:49,979
Now, Chad,
you have to be careful.
51
00:01:50,022 --> 00:01:51,328
It is a sword.
52
00:01:51,372 --> 00:01:53,374
Get rid of this shit,
right?
53
00:01:53,417 --> 00:01:54,984
[ Both chuckle ]
54
00:01:55,027 --> 00:01:56,942
Those pants are hideous.
55
00:01:56,986 --> 00:02:02,165
♪
56
00:02:02,209 --> 00:02:03,166
[ Cellphone beeps ]
Hi, Dad.
57
00:02:03,210 --> 00:02:05,212
It's Chad, your son.
58
00:02:05,255 --> 00:02:07,170
Sword. [ Chuckles ]
59
00:02:07,214 --> 00:02:09,781
I got it.
It's friggin' amazing.
60
00:02:09,825 --> 00:02:14,177
Mom got me pants,
so you win again.
61
00:02:14,221 --> 00:02:17,180
Want to see some tricks?
62
00:02:17,224 --> 00:02:18,399
♪
63
00:02:18,442 --> 00:02:20,183
Wait. Shoot.
64
00:02:20,227 --> 00:02:26,276
♪
65
00:02:26,320 --> 00:02:29,061
[ Distorted shout ]
66
00:02:29,105 --> 00:02:32,282
♪
67
00:02:32,326 --> 00:02:35,198
That's the end of my video.
68
00:02:35,242 --> 00:02:36,199
Thank you.
69
00:02:36,243 --> 00:02:37,853
Miss you.
70
00:02:37,896 --> 00:02:39,115
♪
71
00:02:39,159 --> 00:02:40,203
[ Blows ]
72
00:02:40,247 --> 00:02:42,901
Lights out, Chad.
Time for bed.
73
00:02:42,945 --> 00:02:44,251
Clearly busy,
Mom.
74
00:02:44,294 --> 00:02:45,469
I'm cleaning the sword.
75
00:02:45,513 --> 00:02:47,210
And after this,
I got to polish it
76
00:02:47,254 --> 00:02:49,691
with some microcrystalline
Renaissance Wax
77
00:02:49,734 --> 00:02:52,259
that prevents rust
almost indefinitely.
78
00:02:52,302 --> 00:02:54,261
-There's a whole process.
-Mm-hmm.
79
00:02:54,304 --> 00:02:56,437
You had
a pretty fun weekend.
80
00:02:56,480 --> 00:02:59,309
[ Chuckles ]
Yeah, 'cause of my sword.
81
00:02:59,353 --> 00:03:00,441
Oh, Mom.
Mm-hmm?
82
00:03:00,484 --> 00:03:02,921
Look.
Saw this note in the box.
83
00:03:02,965 --> 00:03:04,009
[ Chuckles ]
84
00:03:04,053 --> 00:03:06,098
Called me
his little warrior.
85
00:03:06,142 --> 00:03:07,361
[ Snickers ] Cute.
86
00:03:07,404 --> 00:03:08,492
[ Chuckles ]
Yeah.
87
00:03:08,536 --> 00:03:10,059
Your dad
loves you so much.
88
00:03:10,102 --> 00:03:11,147
I know, huh?
89
00:03:11,191 --> 00:03:13,236
For someone I see
literally never,
90
00:03:13,280 --> 00:03:16,239
he sure knows how to throw
a damn smile on my face.
91
00:03:16,283 --> 00:03:18,154
Listen,
about your dad,
92
00:03:18,198 --> 00:03:21,244
I know you have
a lot of feelings about him.
93
00:03:21,288 --> 00:03:23,464
What do you think
about maybe
94
00:03:23,507 --> 00:03:25,944
talking to
your school counselor?
95
00:03:25,988 --> 00:03:30,297
Aww, that's a fun,
little idea.
96
00:03:30,340 --> 00:03:32,473
But pretty sure anyone
97
00:03:32,516 --> 00:03:34,344
looking at my life
from the outside in
98
00:03:34,388 --> 00:03:36,085
would be like,
"Yep, you're good."
99
00:03:36,128 --> 00:03:38,479
Well, I made you an appointment
to see him tomorrow,
100
00:03:38,522 --> 00:03:41,482
so I'm sorry I phrased it
like a question.
101
00:03:41,525 --> 00:03:43,397
That was straight-up
sneaky of you.
102
00:03:43,440 --> 00:03:44,963
Please don't
do that again.
103
00:03:45,007 --> 00:03:47,488
Okay.
104
00:03:47,531 --> 00:03:49,838
And you are not to take
that sword to school tomorrow.
105
00:03:49,881 --> 00:03:52,319
-I'm not going to.
-Chad, promise me.
106
00:03:52,362 --> 00:03:54,321
I promise!
I'm serious.
107
00:03:54,364 --> 00:03:57,280
Mom,
I swear on Niki's life.
108
00:03:57,324 --> 00:03:59,978
♪
109
00:04:00,022 --> 00:04:01,589
You look like
Captain Jack Sparrow
110
00:04:01,632 --> 00:04:04,156
from "Pirates of the Caribbean:
Curse of the Black Pearl."
111
00:04:04,200 --> 00:04:06,289
Okay, you don't need to say
the whole title, Peter,
112
00:04:06,333 --> 00:04:07,725
but thank you.
113
00:04:07,769 --> 00:04:09,510
Hey,
can I hold it?
114
00:04:09,553 --> 00:04:12,164
Mm,
just for a little bit.
115
00:04:12,208 --> 00:04:14,297
Okay.
116
00:04:14,341 --> 00:04:17,300
♪
117
00:04:17,344 --> 00:04:19,389
Okay, alright,
I'm uncomfortable.
118
00:04:19,433 --> 00:04:20,912
-O-Okay.
-It's just very fragile.
119
00:04:20,956 --> 00:04:22,827
It's an
international artifact.[ Chuckles ]
120
00:04:22,871 --> 00:04:24,525
What a rush.
Right?
121
00:04:24,568 --> 00:04:26,309
Yeah.
Can't wait to bring this puppy to school
122
00:04:26,353 --> 00:04:28,485
and watch people just kind of
slowly lose their minds.
123
00:04:28,529 --> 00:04:30,313
Why are you bringing it
to school?
124
00:04:30,357 --> 00:04:33,316
'Cause it's the coolest friggin'
thing in the world, Peter.
125
00:04:33,360 --> 00:04:36,624
We're in high school now, okay?
Objects matter.
126
00:04:36,667 --> 00:04:38,408
If people thought
me having sex was cool,
127
00:04:38,452 --> 00:04:40,802
they're definitely gonna think
me having a sword is cool.
128
00:04:40,845 --> 00:04:44,458
We just need to find a way
to sneak it past security.
129
00:04:44,501 --> 00:04:49,506
♪
130
00:04:54,511 --> 00:05:01,257
♪
131
00:05:01,301 --> 00:05:04,347
And then she literally, like,
yelled at me, and it was --
132
00:05:04,391 --> 00:05:08,046
Big announcement
at lunch today -- it's a sword.
133
00:05:08,090 --> 00:05:09,396
What'd he say?
134
00:05:09,439 --> 00:05:10,571
Sword.
135
00:05:10,614 --> 00:05:12,964
-Okay.
-Big announcement.
136
00:05:13,008 --> 00:05:14,444
It's gonna be crazy.
137
00:05:14,488 --> 00:05:16,359
Yeah,
bring people to stadium.
138
00:05:16,403 --> 00:05:17,360
Lunchtime.
139
00:05:17,404 --> 00:05:19,144
What's going on,
Bartholomew?
140
00:05:19,188 --> 00:05:20,363
Yeah, this dude's gonna show us
his penis during lunch.
141
00:05:20,407 --> 00:05:23,323
No, I'm not.
It's not my penis.
142
00:05:23,366 --> 00:05:24,498
What is it, then?
143
00:05:24,541 --> 00:05:26,238
Sorry, sir.
144
00:05:26,282 --> 00:05:28,066
Something else entirely.
145
00:05:28,110 --> 00:05:31,243
Peter,
get out of the bathroom.
146
00:05:31,287 --> 00:05:33,724
This isn't a cello.
147
00:05:43,430 --> 00:05:47,390
[Leather squeaking]
148
00:05:47,434 --> 00:05:50,828
So, Chad,
what is up, my man?
149
00:05:50,872 --> 00:05:52,395
Chad:
I'm not totally sure.
150
00:05:52,439 --> 00:05:54,832
I'm not really clear
on what this is
151
00:05:54,876 --> 00:05:56,747
or why
I'm talking to you.
152
00:05:56,791 --> 00:05:59,359
Hey, we are just two homies
hanging out.
153
00:05:59,402 --> 00:06:00,838
So,
your mom mentioned
154
00:06:00,882 --> 00:06:02,449
you haven't seen your dad
in a couple years.
155
00:06:02,492 --> 00:06:04,059
That sucks,
right?
156
00:06:04,842 --> 00:06:08,280
Yeah.
He lives in Iran...
157
00:06:08,324 --> 00:06:09,630
Mm-hmm.
158
00:06:09,673 --> 00:06:12,459
...but he calls me sometimes,
and I always answer.
159
00:06:12,502 --> 00:06:13,547
He has two cars.
160
00:06:13,590 --> 00:06:15,418
Two cars?
Tell me more about Dad.
161
00:06:15,462 --> 00:06:17,464
He seems like
a cool guy.
162
00:06:17,507 --> 00:06:19,248
Um,
he loves olives.
163
00:06:19,291 --> 00:06:21,424
He's jacked and friendly
like a Persian The Rock.
164
00:06:21,468 --> 00:06:23,426
Hm. Hilarious.
165
00:06:23,470 --> 00:06:25,515
You miss him?
166
00:06:26,560 --> 00:06:27,691
Yeah,
I can tell.
167
00:06:27,735 --> 00:06:28,953
And we can't just
168
00:06:28,997 --> 00:06:31,434
Rollerblade over
to Iran, can we?
169
00:06:31,478 --> 00:06:32,653
I mean, we could,
170
00:06:32,696 --> 00:06:35,786
but it'd be hard
'cause it's far from here,
171
00:06:35,830 --> 00:06:39,964
and there are oceans
and obstacles in our way, right?
172
00:06:40,748 --> 00:06:42,967
Are you a real doctor?
173
00:06:46,493 --> 00:06:48,103
Yeah.
174
00:06:48,146 --> 00:06:51,193
Okay, 'cause I'm not trying
to be disrespectful or anything,
175
00:06:51,236 --> 00:06:53,456
but I kind of feel like
you're winging this
176
00:06:53,500 --> 00:06:54,762
and it's going bad.
177
00:06:54,805 --> 00:06:57,460
Oh, boy.
The gloves are coming off.
178
00:06:57,504 --> 00:06:58,679
I'm fun.
179
00:06:58,722 --> 00:07:01,595
I can hang with you.
180
00:07:01,638 --> 00:07:03,074
Alright?
181
00:07:03,118 --> 00:07:04,554
Have I told you
that I used to write
182
00:07:04,598 --> 00:07:06,121
and perform
parody songs in college?
183
00:07:06,164 --> 00:07:10,081
No, sir, I literally met you
like 10 sentences ago.
184
00:07:10,125 --> 00:07:12,693
[ Laughs ]
Taking Charles down.
185
00:07:12,736 --> 00:07:14,303
[ Chuckles ]
I love it.
186
00:07:14,346 --> 00:07:16,610
[ Bell rings ]
Bye.
187
00:07:16,653 --> 00:07:18,220
♪
188
00:07:18,263 --> 00:07:22,006
Chad: Alright, thank you all
for coming to my special reveal.
189
00:07:22,050 --> 00:07:25,140
Uh, lunch lady,
didn't invite you.
190
00:07:25,183 --> 00:07:26,446
Kind of seems like
191
00:07:26,489 --> 00:07:28,709
the only time
you should be working, but okay.
192
00:07:28,752 --> 00:07:31,581
Without further delay,
Peter?
193
00:07:31,625 --> 00:07:35,629
♪
194
00:07:35,672 --> 00:07:38,022
You didn't tell me about
the buckles.
195
00:07:38,066 --> 00:07:39,415
Okay,
we've talked about
196
00:07:39,459 --> 00:07:41,591
when things
are time-sensitive, Peter.
197
00:07:41,635 --> 00:07:44,202
[ Grunts ]
Here we go.
198
00:07:44,246 --> 00:07:46,204
♪
199
00:07:46,248 --> 00:07:47,423
It's a sword.
200
00:07:47,467 --> 00:07:51,166
It's a real-life,
full-on authentic sword.
201
00:07:53,864 --> 00:07:55,344
They're completely shocked.
202
00:07:55,387 --> 00:07:56,998
Yeah.
[ Chuckles ] Can't believe it.
203
00:07:57,041 --> 00:07:59,479
Is that it?
[ Scoffs ] No.
204
00:07:59,522 --> 00:08:01,655
♪ Dun, dun,
dun-dun-dun-dun-dun -- ♪
205
00:08:01,698 --> 00:08:03,395
Not yet.
Do it at the end.
206
00:08:03,439 --> 00:08:10,968
♪ Dun, dun,
dun-dun-dun-dun-dun ♪
207
00:08:11,012 --> 00:08:12,579
Are you all
ready for Chad?
208
00:08:12,622 --> 00:08:14,363
Denise: Chad, you shouldn't
bring that to school.
209
00:08:14,406 --> 00:08:16,757
I don't think people
are amused by weapons.
210
00:08:16,800 --> 00:08:18,715
Marjorie: Yeah, I mean,
she's right.
211
00:08:18,759 --> 00:08:20,369
Especially in
this political climate.
212
00:08:20,412 --> 00:08:22,980
Okay, this is definitely
the last thing I need right now
213
00:08:23,024 --> 00:08:24,591
is for the two of you
to join forces.
214
00:08:24,634 --> 00:08:25,940
Separate, please.
215
00:08:25,983 --> 00:08:27,681
Obviously,
I'm a huge feminist,
216
00:08:27,724 --> 00:08:29,857
but if you could redirect
your evil female energy...
217
00:08:29,900 --> 00:08:32,642
[ Bell rings ]
Ugh.
218
00:08:32,686 --> 00:08:35,384
That went by fast.
219
00:08:35,427 --> 00:08:39,606
Ple-- Please try to spread
the word about my sword.
220
00:08:39,649 --> 00:08:43,784
♪
221
00:08:43,827 --> 00:08:46,003
Hey, Reid.
Ah, sword.
222
00:08:46,047 --> 00:08:47,570
En garde,
bitch.
223
00:08:47,614 --> 00:08:49,485
Unh, unh, unh.
224
00:08:49,529 --> 00:08:51,269
[ Both chuckle ]
225
00:08:51,313 --> 00:08:52,575
He liked it.
226
00:08:52,619 --> 00:08:55,622
He li--
you liked it.
227
00:08:55,665 --> 00:08:58,799
I had a really good time
just now.
228
00:08:58,842 --> 00:09:01,192
That --
That little fun we had.
229
00:09:01,236 --> 00:09:04,456
You know, like,
playfully called me a bitch.
230
00:09:04,500 --> 00:09:05,719
[ Both chuckle ]
231
00:09:05,762 --> 00:09:07,982
Yeah, man.
-Uh, cool sword. -It is cool, huh?
232
00:09:08,025 --> 00:09:09,679
Yeah.
Oh, hey.
233
00:09:09,723 --> 00:09:11,768
Um,
I was just thinking,
234
00:09:11,812 --> 00:09:13,814
since based on
just what happened
235
00:09:13,857 --> 00:09:17,208
and everything I know
about the sword
236
00:09:17,252 --> 00:09:20,603
and how awesome it is
and how awesome you are,
237
00:09:20,647 --> 00:09:24,346
um,
you can have it.
238
00:09:24,389 --> 00:09:25,739
For real?
239
00:09:25,782 --> 00:09:27,654
Yep.
It's yours, man.
240
00:09:27,697 --> 00:09:28,829
You just go ahead
and keep it.
241
00:09:28,872 --> 00:09:30,657
Cool, man.
Thanks.
242
00:09:30,700 --> 00:09:32,093
[ Chuckles ]
243
00:09:32,136 --> 00:09:33,268
Hey, Reid.
244
00:09:33,311 --> 00:09:37,402
Life is short.
Be happy.
245
00:09:37,446 --> 00:09:39,970
Yeah.
Uh, thanks.
246
00:09:41,450 --> 00:09:46,455
♪
247
00:09:51,460 --> 00:09:56,465
♪
248
00:10:01,470 --> 00:10:04,691
♪
249
00:10:07,607 --> 00:10:10,653
[ Laughter ]
250
00:10:10,697 --> 00:10:13,482
Reid:
Look at that.[ Chuckles ] Hey, guys.
251
00:10:13,525 --> 00:10:15,876
Reid: See it?
-I know you do. -What's up?
252
00:10:15,919 --> 00:10:17,660
Hey, Reid, did you
get a chance to tell them
253
00:10:17,704 --> 00:10:19,662
the whole backstory yet
with the sword
254
00:10:19,706 --> 00:10:22,926
and wh-where you got it
and who you got it from?
255
00:10:22,970 --> 00:10:24,624
Wh-What's that?
256
00:10:25,668 --> 00:10:28,628
Dude, Reid,
your sword is so awesome.
257
00:10:28,671 --> 00:10:29,846
Uh-oh.
258
00:10:29,890 --> 00:10:33,589
He doesn't know
the whole backstory.
259
00:10:33,633 --> 00:10:35,199
Oh. Oh! Ohhhhh!
260
00:10:35,243 --> 00:10:36,636
[ Laughter ]
261
00:10:36,679 --> 00:10:38,899
Get this
on the 'gram.
262
00:10:38,942 --> 00:10:40,552
Oh, hell yes.
So sick.
263
00:10:40,596 --> 00:10:42,467
Let's all get a photo
for our Instagram accounts.
264
00:10:42,511 --> 00:10:44,034
[ Camera shutter clicks ]
265
00:10:44,078 --> 00:10:45,862
And if -- Reid, if you could
tag me, that would be awesome.
266
00:10:45,906 --> 00:10:48,996
Oh, okay. I'm just gonna --
oh, here we go.
267
00:10:49,039 --> 00:10:50,867
Oh,
I stepped in shit.
268
00:10:50,911 --> 00:10:52,869
Oh!
You stepped in dog shit!
269
00:10:52,913 --> 00:10:54,654
Shoot.
[ Chuckling ] Oh, no.
270
00:10:54,697 --> 00:10:55,916
-You stepped in shit.
-No.
271
00:10:55,959 --> 00:10:57,874
I'm literally stabbing
old dog shit.
272
00:10:57,918 --> 00:10:59,702
Oh, my God.
No, don't do that.
273
00:10:59,746 --> 00:11:01,922
Jaxon shit himself.
[ Chuckles ]
274
00:11:01,965 --> 00:11:03,793
Why is it so soft?
275
00:11:03,837 --> 00:11:05,316
Is this animal okay?
276
00:11:05,360 --> 00:11:08,015
Don't do that with the --
[ Chuckles ]
277
00:11:08,058 --> 00:11:09,538
That's really funny,
278
00:11:09,581 --> 00:11:11,540
but that's not --
it's not really for that.
279
00:11:11,583 --> 00:11:15,457
It's an
international artifact.
280
00:11:15,500 --> 00:11:16,719
[ Laughter ]
281
00:11:16,763 --> 00:11:18,895
Dude,
why is it curved?
282
00:11:18,939 --> 00:11:21,637
[ Laughter ]
283
00:11:21,681 --> 00:11:23,595
Ew! Ew!
284
00:11:23,639 --> 00:11:25,728
Unh, unh, unh!
285
00:11:25,772 --> 00:11:29,210
Slice and dice. Aha.
286
00:11:29,993 --> 00:11:32,517
Chad: [ Groans ]
287
00:11:33,780 --> 00:11:35,738
Stupid, stupid, stupid.
288
00:11:35,782 --> 00:11:38,610
Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid.
289
00:11:38,654 --> 00:11:40,612
Chad,
what's wrong?
290
00:11:40,656 --> 00:11:41,962
Chad: Nothing.
291
00:11:42,005 --> 00:11:43,354
It's just man stuff.
292
00:11:43,398 --> 00:11:45,313
I don't want to talk
to you about it. You're a lady.
293
00:11:45,356 --> 00:11:47,750
Honey, you can talk to me
about anything.
294
00:11:47,794 --> 00:11:49,621
I wanna talk
to men only right now.
295
00:11:49,665 --> 00:11:51,101
Please bring me Ikrimah.
296
00:11:51,145 --> 00:11:52,973
I'll bring Hamid.
297
00:11:53,016 --> 00:11:54,583
And Ikrimah.
298
00:11:56,977 --> 00:11:58,979
So, what's up,
young stud?
299
00:11:59,022 --> 00:12:01,895
Give it to us,
men on men.
300
00:12:01,938 --> 00:12:03,984
I need to talk to you guys
about something,
301
00:12:04,027 --> 00:12:06,638
but you have to swear
not to tell my mom.
302
00:12:06,682 --> 00:12:07,770
No questions asked.
303
00:12:07,814 --> 00:12:11,121
Cross my heart
and hope to die.
304
00:12:11,165 --> 00:12:12,296
Ikrimah.
305
00:12:12,340 --> 00:12:15,560
I mean, it depends on
what you tell me.
306
00:12:15,604 --> 00:12:16,910
I can also just leave.
307
00:12:16,953 --> 00:12:18,215
You must stay.
308
00:12:18,259 --> 00:12:20,783
I could never do this
without you.
309
00:12:20,827 --> 00:12:22,916
He's good.
He swears.
310
00:12:22,959 --> 00:12:26,223
Okay, well,
I took my sword to school,
311
00:12:26,267 --> 00:12:28,182
even though
I wasn't supposed to,
312
00:12:28,225 --> 00:12:30,227
and this guy Reid
really liked it,
313
00:12:30,271 --> 00:12:34,405
so I gave him my sword
to keep forever.
314
00:12:34,449 --> 00:12:36,625
No, no, no,
but your dad gave it to you.
315
00:12:36,668 --> 00:12:37,974
I know.
Shoot.
316
00:12:38,018 --> 00:12:40,194
You're making me nervous,
Hamid.
317
00:12:40,237 --> 00:12:41,761
It's okay,
it's okay.
318
00:12:41,804 --> 00:12:44,198
Hey, you could just go
back to school and get it back.
319
00:12:44,241 --> 00:12:45,895
Bingo.
320
00:12:45,939 --> 00:12:48,942
And I think the way to do that
is to tell the truth.
321
00:12:48,985 --> 00:12:50,030
Yes.
322
00:12:50,073 --> 00:12:51,901
Ikrimah,
you're on fire.
323
00:12:51,945 --> 00:12:54,686
You must talk
to this Reid face-to-face.
324
00:12:54,730 --> 00:12:57,124
Approach him,
look him in the eyes,
325
00:12:57,167 --> 00:12:58,647
take his hand gently.
326
00:12:58,690 --> 00:13:01,128
Mm, I don't know about --
I wouldn't take his hand.
327
00:13:01,171 --> 00:13:03,739
Look him in the eyes
and tell him
328
00:13:03,783 --> 00:13:06,263
what the sword means to you
on a personal level.
329
00:13:06,307 --> 00:13:07,569
If he is
a good man,
330
00:13:07,612 --> 00:13:09,397
he will
give you the sword back.
331
00:13:09,440 --> 00:13:12,661
As long
as Ikrimah's on board.
332
00:13:12,704 --> 00:13:14,054
Yeah.
333
00:13:14,097 --> 00:13:17,013
The three of us,
huh?
334
00:13:17,057 --> 00:13:19,624
We are
so same-minded.
335
00:13:19,668 --> 00:13:24,238
This is Lamborghini-level
problem solving.
336
00:13:24,281 --> 00:13:27,894
[ Indistinct conversations ]
337
00:13:37,338 --> 00:13:38,992
Alright,
I'm gonna just do it, Peter.
338
00:13:39,035 --> 00:13:40,210
I'm gonna stay cool
339
00:13:40,254 --> 00:13:43,083
and tell him
how much the sword means to me.
340
00:13:43,126 --> 00:13:45,085
I-I believe in you,
buddy.
341
00:13:45,128 --> 00:13:48,088
Just do it
the way we practiced.
342
00:13:48,131 --> 00:13:51,047
Here I go.
Mm.
343
00:13:51,091 --> 00:13:53,658
[ SUV door closes ]
344
00:13:58,402 --> 00:13:59,882
Hey, Reid.
345
00:13:59,926 --> 00:14:01,666
Ah, hey, man.
What's up?
346
00:14:01,710 --> 00:14:03,320
Hi, hi, and hello.
347
00:14:03,364 --> 00:14:05,932
What is up is,
how's your day?
348
00:14:05,975 --> 00:14:07,672
And also,
I was wondering
349
00:14:07,716 --> 00:14:09,936
if I could talk to you
about the sword.
350
00:14:09,979 --> 00:14:11,067
Oh, yeah, the sword.
351
00:14:11,111 --> 00:14:12,721
Yeah, I put up
mad videos last night
352
00:14:12,764 --> 00:14:14,549
and got, like,
triple digits on Instagram.
353
00:14:14,592 --> 00:14:16,029
So it's, like, huge.
354
00:14:16,072 --> 00:14:17,639
Yeah, I-I saw.
355
00:14:17,682 --> 00:14:19,336
It was really cool.
356
00:14:19,380 --> 00:14:21,382
Yeah.
Oh, there it is.
357
00:14:21,425 --> 00:14:23,253
What's your Instagram?
I'll tag you.
358
00:14:23,297 --> 00:14:24,994
Forgot to give you
photo creds.
359
00:14:25,038 --> 00:14:26,735
Sorr-- I'm sorry.
What?
360
00:14:26,778 --> 00:14:28,476
What's your Instagram?
361
00:14:28,519 --> 00:14:32,349
It's, uh, Chad underscore
Amani underscore.
362
00:14:32,393 --> 00:14:35,048
Don't forget
the second underscore.
363
00:14:35,091 --> 00:14:36,266
Yeah,
I-I-I got it.
364
00:14:36,310 --> 00:14:38,790
Can I just make sure
that you didn't forget?
365
00:14:38,834 --> 00:14:39,922
Is that --
is that you?
366
00:14:39,966 --> 00:14:41,271
That's me.
367
00:14:41,315 --> 00:14:43,534
[ Chuckles ] Okay.
368
00:14:43,578 --> 00:14:48,713
Wh-- What was it
you were gonna ask for?
369
00:14:49,976 --> 00:14:51,978
Just gonna say
thank you.
370
00:14:52,021 --> 00:14:53,153
For everything.
371
00:14:53,196 --> 00:14:55,416
Oh.
That's it?
372
00:14:55,459 --> 00:14:56,721
Yep.
373
00:14:56,765 --> 00:14:59,986
And also, just to --
don't forget to have a TGIF.
374
00:15:00,029 --> 00:15:01,030
Thanks.
375
00:15:01,074 --> 00:15:04,033
Enjoy your Wednesday night,
Reid.
376
00:15:08,951 --> 00:15:11,867
Hey, what -- what does TGIF
stand for, again?
377
00:15:11,911 --> 00:15:12,955
Thank God It's Friday.
378
00:15:12,999 --> 00:15:14,391
Shit. Damn.
379
00:15:14,435 --> 00:15:16,437
Yeah,
I used it wrong.
380
00:15:16,480 --> 00:15:17,699
Dang it.
381
00:15:17,742 --> 00:15:18,961
How'd it go?
382
00:15:19,005 --> 00:15:21,224
Well, he's gonna acknowledge me
on Instagram,
383
00:15:21,268 --> 00:15:22,791
so guess you could say
384
00:15:22,834 --> 00:15:25,185
it was one of the best
conversations of my entire life.
385
00:15:25,228 --> 00:15:27,404
And he's gonna
give you back the sword?
386
00:15:27,448 --> 00:15:29,580
No.
No, he's not.
387
00:15:29,624 --> 00:15:32,192
But I only have one father
in this life,
388
00:15:32,235 --> 00:15:35,978
so we're gonna
have to steal it.
389
00:15:36,022 --> 00:15:39,634
This one's for you,
Babai.
390
00:15:39,677 --> 00:15:41,375
Congratulations.
391
00:15:41,418 --> 00:15:42,985
Chad: If you're here,
you've been picked
392
00:15:43,029 --> 00:15:44,421
to help with
what I call
393
00:15:44,465 --> 00:15:46,162
"Operation
Steal the Sword Back."
394
00:15:46,206 --> 00:15:47,598
First step --
395
00:15:47,642 --> 00:15:49,165
Peter, can you confirm
the car is locked?
396
00:15:49,209 --> 00:15:51,385
[ Door handle rattles ]
It's locked, sir.
397
00:15:51,428 --> 00:15:52,995
I like that.
I like the "sir."
398
00:15:53,039 --> 00:15:54,301
Everybody,
do that.
399
00:15:54,344 --> 00:15:56,390
Marjorie: I'm sorry.
Do I need to be here?
400
00:15:56,433 --> 00:15:57,652
I feel like
you're acting like
401
00:15:57,695 --> 00:15:59,306
I'm part of
your friend group.
402
00:15:59,349 --> 00:16:01,177
Marjorie,
everyone plays a role,
403
00:16:01,221 --> 00:16:02,831
and you're at the center
of this thing.
404
00:16:02,874 --> 00:16:04,485
We need you
to break into the car.
405
00:16:04,528 --> 00:16:06,052
I don't know
how to break into a car.
406
00:16:06,095 --> 00:16:07,705
What are you
talking about?
407
00:16:07,749 --> 00:16:09,272
Don't you come from
the wrong side of the tracks?
408
00:16:09,316 --> 00:16:10,534
Reid:
Hey, one sec!
409
00:16:10,578 --> 00:16:12,449
Just got to grab my vape
from my car!
410
00:16:12,493 --> 00:16:13,624
Shit.
Reid's coming back.
411
00:16:13,668 --> 00:16:15,061
Okay,
let's get out of here.
412
00:16:15,104 --> 00:16:16,714
We'll come back when --[ Glass shatters ]
413
00:16:16,758 --> 00:16:19,195
I panicked.
414
00:16:19,239 --> 00:16:21,502
♪
415
00:16:21,545 --> 00:16:23,547
Uh, Chad?
416
00:16:23,591 --> 00:16:26,028
Dude, some dude
just flew into your car.
417
00:16:26,072 --> 00:16:28,726
What the hell?
418
00:16:28,770 --> 00:16:30,206
P-Please.
419
00:16:30,250 --> 00:16:31,729
I'll -- I'll pay
for everything.
420
00:16:31,773 --> 00:16:32,992
Please.
421
00:16:33,035 --> 00:16:34,471
Why are you
in my car?
422
00:16:34,515 --> 00:16:36,125
W-What is wrong
with you?
423
00:16:36,169 --> 00:16:38,258
You broke into
my car.
424
00:16:38,301 --> 00:16:39,911
Wow.
What a freak.
425
00:16:39,955 --> 00:16:41,130
No,
I'm not a freak.
426
00:16:41,174 --> 00:16:42,871
[ Sword clinks ]
Ah!
427
00:16:42,914 --> 00:16:46,092
[ Crying ]
You don't understand.
428
00:16:46,135 --> 00:16:48,572
It's my daddy.
429
00:16:48,616 --> 00:16:50,313
Dude,
are you on meth? Dude.
430
00:16:50,357 --> 00:16:52,098
Chad:
Shut up!
431
00:16:52,141 --> 00:16:53,447
It's from my daddy.
432
00:16:53,490 --> 00:16:55,405
He told me
to protect it.
433
00:16:55,449 --> 00:16:57,233
No, Chad, your leg.
434
00:16:57,277 --> 00:17:00,236
You need
to go get some help.
435
00:17:00,280 --> 00:17:02,064
It was just a snafu.
436
00:17:02,108 --> 00:17:04,066
No, you're bleeding,
Chad.
437
00:17:04,110 --> 00:17:06,242
Peter, tell them.
438
00:17:06,286 --> 00:17:09,028
Why is it escalating?
439
00:17:09,071 --> 00:17:10,333
Chad.
Oh, my God.
440
00:17:10,377 --> 00:17:13,728
It was just
-a little snafu. -What's going on?
441
00:17:13,771 --> 00:17:15,077
This kid's
just bleeding to death
442
00:17:15,121 --> 00:17:17,123
and saying "daddy"
and "snafu."
443
00:17:17,166 --> 00:17:21,127
Chad,
it's Charles.
444
00:17:21,170 --> 00:17:22,345
Charles:
Put the sword down,
445
00:17:22,389 --> 00:17:24,217
or I will
have to tackle you.
446
00:17:24,260 --> 00:17:26,915
I don't want
to get tackled.
447
00:17:26,958 --> 00:17:29,135
We love you, Chad.
Just put it down.
448
00:17:29,178 --> 00:17:31,093
I promise --
you put the sword down,
449
00:17:31,137 --> 00:17:32,660
no tackling
will happen.
450
00:17:35,184 --> 00:17:37,882
Okay. Okay.
451
00:17:44,280 --> 00:17:45,803
[ Both grunt ]
All: Oh!
452
00:17:48,850 --> 00:17:51,244
What a roller coaster
we've been on with these pants.
453
00:17:51,287 --> 00:17:52,245
[ Chuckles ]
454
00:17:52,288 --> 00:17:53,724
Guess they're going
455
00:17:53,768 --> 00:17:57,032
where they were
destined to be all along.
456
00:17:57,076 --> 00:17:58,512
Trash.
457
00:17:58,555 --> 00:18:01,341
Chad, this is exactly
what I didn't want to happen.
458
00:18:01,384 --> 00:18:03,995
I'm obviously
getting rid of this.
459
00:18:04,039 --> 00:18:05,519
What?
Mom, no.
460
00:18:05,562 --> 00:18:07,347
This is my lowest point
in my life,
461
00:18:07,390 --> 00:18:09,131
and you're taking my one sword
from my one father?
462
00:18:09,175 --> 00:18:10,654
Come on, Chad.
463
00:18:10,698 --> 00:18:12,613
I shouldn't have let you have it
from the start.
464
00:18:12,656 --> 00:18:14,876
Mom, wait.
Just let me say goodbye.
465
00:18:14,919 --> 00:18:16,138
No, Chad.
466
00:18:16,182 --> 00:18:17,357
Mom.
Stop it.
467
00:18:17,400 --> 00:18:18,967
Oh, my God, Mom.
468
00:18:19,010 --> 00:18:21,274
Just tell him that
you bought the sword already.
469
00:18:21,317 --> 00:18:24,277
And all the other
Dad gifts.
470
00:18:25,582 --> 00:18:29,325
Niki,
can you give us a minute?
471
00:18:30,500 --> 00:18:35,331
Mom,
why would you do that?
472
00:18:35,375 --> 00:18:38,291
[ Sighs ] Chad.
473
00:18:38,334 --> 00:18:40,206
I know.
474
00:18:40,249 --> 00:18:41,642
I --
475
00:18:41,685 --> 00:18:44,035
It's okay.
476
00:18:44,079 --> 00:18:45,515
It doesn't even matter.
477
00:18:45,559 --> 00:18:47,256
No,
let me explain.
478
00:18:47,300 --> 00:18:50,172
Mom, I just already said
it doesn't matter even.
479
00:18:50,216 --> 00:18:55,003
'Cause...
if Dad were here,
480
00:18:55,046 --> 00:18:57,397
he would've
gotten me the sword, right?
481
00:18:57,440 --> 00:18:59,355
Mm-hmm.
482
00:18:59,399 --> 00:19:02,010
Yeah. See?
483
00:19:02,053 --> 00:19:08,364
And he is definitely
still really proud of me, right?
484
00:19:08,408 --> 00:19:10,888
He's really
proud of you.
485
00:19:10,932 --> 00:19:16,938
Look, I'm not gonna
take your sword away.
486
00:19:16,981 --> 00:19:19,419
But it is a weapon.
487
00:19:19,462 --> 00:19:22,639
So I'm gonna place it
on this shelf...
488
00:19:24,424 --> 00:19:27,035
...and I'll take it
back down
489
00:19:27,078 --> 00:19:28,863
when you're old enough
to be more responsible.
490
00:19:28,906 --> 00:19:31,213
So, like,
could be tomorrow,
491
00:19:31,257 --> 00:19:33,084
maybe the next day?
492
00:19:33,128 --> 00:19:37,045
Probably a bit further off
than that.
493
00:19:40,440 --> 00:19:42,485
Hey, Mom?
Mm-hmm?
494
00:19:42,529 --> 00:19:45,662
Thank you
for everything.
495
00:19:45,706 --> 00:19:48,665
You're a really great mom
and whatnot.
496
00:19:48,709 --> 00:19:50,928
I love ya,
honey.
497
00:19:50,972 --> 00:19:52,626
Love you, too.
498
00:19:56,020 --> 00:19:59,023
Actually, no.
499
00:20:00,286 --> 00:20:02,418
What the hell
was I thinking?
500
00:20:02,462 --> 00:20:06,030
[ Singing in native language ]
501
00:20:06,074 --> 00:20:11,079
♪
502
00:20:16,084 --> 00:20:21,089
♪
503
00:20:26,094 --> 00:20:31,099
♪
504
00:20:36,104 --> 00:20:41,109
♪
505
00:20:45,461 --> 00:20:46,984
♪
506
00:20:47,034 --> 00:20:51,584
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
34101
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
