Original subtitles

Your mind may be wandering right now.

Downloaded from YTS.MX

This is all right, let it wander.

And come back to the present moment when you're ready.

Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX

Repeat as many times as you need.

There's no pressure.

Time will not harm you.

It is an invention, a construct of the unimaginative,

of the oppressors.

The way you are feeling right now is a by-product of toxins

and the toilet drugs that have seeped into the waters.

I am very angry with you, Richie.

Now go to your room!

- But Mommy, I didn't do it! - Go to your room!

- I didn't do it! - Your father will deal

with you later. - I'll deal with him now.

Buddy, apologize to the boy.

- But he just- - I just.

- You just? - I just.

- And i-

- That's unjust.

Honey, I did it with my little laundry markup thing.

Ritchie, darling, come here to mommy.

- Good morning, Mr. Zach. - Mr. Vivek.

- You call me just Vivek.

- You call me just Zach. - Okay, just Zach.

My fiancee. - You wish, Vivek.

- Oh, I do.

I do wish.

You would like this girl.

- Thanks, but I'm not looking.

- Still always be on

the look, just Zach.

How else do you find anything of value in this life?

Bagel with butter, darling?

- Yes.

- I found that I'm able to keep it around longer

with the clarity of knowing how much I have and where.

- Huh?

- You watched me order the cash.

- Um, do you do that much cash spending?

- No, not really.

- Then what does it matter?

- Says the woman who just paid in exact change.

- So I can keep the rest of my carefully allocated funds

in my digitized banking account.

- Where it'll be more quickly spent on the internet.

- Nope, not for me.

- I think you're both right.

Many people spend too much money on the internet.

It's good to save.

Saving leaves more for family.

- Enjoy your coffee

- You too. - And bagel.

- You too. - Mm hm, I didn't get a bagel.

- Ah.

He's nice boy.

A bit nervous maybe.

- Yeah. - But he's nice.

- I get enough nervous inside my own head.

Thanks.

- I understand.

I worry all the time.

It's hard these days.

- Thanks, Vivek.

Have a good night.

Make lots of money.

- Thank you.

Yes, you too.

More money is good.

Maybe I'll take a vacation.

- Hey.

Um, I'm not weird or anything.

- Kind of a weird opener.

- Sorry.

Can I ask you?

Why are you up so early on a Saturday?

- You first.

- Insomnia.

Bad. - Yeah?

- Yeah.

- How bad?

- Pretty bad.

I think the worst of it is over

or I'm just very, very used to it.

- Oh, me too.

I mean, I have the same issue.

I'm also probably really used to it too.

I don't know, I'd rather be sleeping.

- Mm.

How long?

- I've been up about three hours, slept-

- I meant, I meant how long has it been going on?

- Oh, always. - Sorry.

That sucks.

- How bad has it gotten for you?

- Ooh, it's been two years.

Yeah.

I had to get help, like real help.

Couldn't tell where the line was between sleeplessness

and I don't know, life.

Other things, not being able to cope maybe.

I thought it was coping and something broke.

You?

- Are you asking if I'm broken?

- What?

No, no, no, I meant, I don't know.

What's your strategy?

Like, are you, are you talking to someone?

You don't have to answer if it's too personal.

- Not yet.

I mean, I haven't had to talk to anybody yet.

I don't know.

It's not that severe.

Like I said, it's been my whole life, so, yeah, maybe.

Maybe I should have spoken to someone by now.

But I just can't seem to get anything stable going you know?

- With sleep? - Oh, yeah, with sleep.

With life too.

You know, I mean, there's stable

and then there's progress, right?

So. - Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Or at least that's what other people talk about

as if it exists for them.

Yeah.

- That guy. - Yeah, yeah.

So, um, are you doing anything?

I know it's a weird time and all.

I don't have anything planned.

Talking is better than...

- Mindless TV alone in the dark.

- Yeah, yeah.

Actually, I started turning on all the lights

to sort of reestablish the line

between sleep and wakefulness.

- Ah. - Yeah.

That's a good idea.

- So, are you doing anything?

- Oh, yeah.

I've got this birthday party that I need to be at

in like a few minutes, so.

- Oh, what?

- No, I'm not.

I'm just burning time before I have to go to work.

I was just gonna eat this bagel and then go home

and watch some TV in the dark.

Oh, with the lights on now.

I'll probably try that out.

- So, you want to?

You wanna hang out?

- Uh, where would we go?

I mean, I, there is nothing open for like an hour or more

and at least within walking distance

and I'm not getting on the subway.

- Well, we can walk for a while.

- And I'm supposed to feel comfortable walking

the dark streets alone with some guy that I just met.

- Well, we can keep to the well lit areas.

There are people around on the avenues.

Uh, yeah.

I mean, I know it's sleepy around here,

but it's still New York.

So...

Walk with me.

- Well, that was a text to my roommate.

She's gonna be up soon, probably for her yoga class.

And now she knows that I'm out with a strange dude

that I met who asked me out before 5:00 a.m..

What's your name?

- Oh, sorry, Zach.

- Last name. - Bell.

- Is that a fake name?

- It could be, but it isn't.

- And smile.

Okay, now she knows your name and what you look like.

- Okay, okay.

- All right let's- - All right.

So, shall we

- I'm Sophia. - No, I know.

I know everything about you, Sophia.

Kidding. - Too soon, Zach Bell.

Too soon. - Sorry.

Yeah, you're right.

Eventually I realized that I'd gotten so crazy

about sleeping some exact amount in the same way

I always had before that I never allowed for the possibility

my sleep pattern could just change.

With age.

Maybe that.

Something else.

- Yeah.

I got sober...

More recently than not.

For about 18 months now.

A couple of weeks ago, I realized that I never really

knew sleep without alcohol.

I mean, since I was about 15 at least.

Now, I mean, I didn't drink every day.

Although I did drink most days,

but life is simpler now since I quit.

- And so, sleep is simpler.

- Eh, sort of.

You know, most days I'm lucky if I can sleep

five hours in a row.

that keeps me healthy enough,

but it still feels off.

- Yeah.

That's sort of what happened to me.

I mean, not exactly, but eventually I realized,

or if I just got up and went about my day

then it was easier to just get by.

Fighting it really burned me out.

I got...

I got really depressed.

- Oh.

Yeah, that's hard.

- Yeah, it's, I'm still, it's...

It's still hard.

Most days I just go to work, come home,

sit in front of the TV and repeat.

- Yeah.

- And I don't really go out all that much anymore though.

I don't know if I would, even if I did feel better.

I don't do those apps or anything.

- Well, thanks for sharing that with me.

- You've been pretty open as well.

- I usually am.

- Huh.

Isn't that hard?

- Uh...

It's harder, mm...

It's harder to fight it, I think.

It's like what you said with the sleep.

That's something I learned with the sobriety especially.

I've taken some, some, some knocks because of it,

being open for most of the time, but I really,

I really would rather just be who I am.

It's more exhausting to be or it's more exhausting

to pretend to fit into everybody else's definitions

or like, society's definitions.

I don't know.

I think, I think that just, I just think maybe I was,

I was really confused for a long time

about how or why I didn't fit in.

So, I just sort of covered myself up with

whatever I could find.

Booze, especially.

So, now you think that who you are

is really just that open?

Yeah, for better or for worse.

Oh.

It's different for women. - How so?

- Do you know what keeps me up at night?

Men.

Fear of men

- What, did I?

- No. - I was only-

- No, you didn't do anything wrong.

Well, I mean, you did hit on me at a time

when I clearly would rather have not been bothered,

but you did it right, basically.

I mean, I appreciate that your approach

was thoughtful, measured.

And even if, even if, you know,

I didn't wanna walk with you,

I wouldn't have been upset in these terms,

because, well, you're clearly not that kind of a threat.

But it's the culture, you know?

Maybe, maybe not the culture in the way

that you described it or maybe it is,

but you know, it just, it frightens me.

And all of the change that's going on right now.

,

any sort of conflict or violence.

Like, why did she think it was okay

to wait for me outside of the bodega?

- Oh, um...

Well, you seemed to know Vivek.

I did, too.

And so, we chatted a bit.

- And so, that tells you that I was interested?

- It was more of an instinct thing.

I get what you're, what you're saying,

but it still needs to stand for something doesn't it?

- Yeah, I agree.

And again, you're not the greatest example of this, but...

Okay, how easy was it for you to approach me?

- Uh, me personally?

- As a man. - Relatively easy.

- Whereas for me, if one or two of those factors from inside

of the bodega go a different way than I need to be thinking

about whether I should scream or run or whether or not

Vivek is going to be able to protect me

or whether he feels like he can leave his store right away.

We don't need to talk about this.

- We can, if you want. - I don't.

- Okay.

- It's just that it's fucking everywhere lately.

And it frightens me, beyond issues of misogyny even.

This default to a base animalistic fear,

this regressive sort of thinking.

You know, I get it a little bit,

but still that doesn't make it any easier to stomach

or any less dangerous to be around.

I mean, we're supposed to be evolved.

People used to believe in things and now they don't.

And so, they lash out, they try to regain control,

and that leads quickly to intimidation,

otherism, ownership. - Yeah.

- And so, so who do they end up hurting, right?

Who are the closest, the easiest victims?

Wives, girlfriends, any woman or any minority,

anybody on the other side of the safe haven

of an anonymous threatening Tweet or DM,

or even not at an anonymous one.

I mean, one that's just launched out into the open,

of nothingness.

I mean, and sometimes, often actually,

from the very top down.

I mean, imagine that.

You know, poison seeped into the very fabric of society

from the top down in the very light of day

and people just accept it because it feeds

the atrophying narrative that they've been force fed

for their entire lives and are too afraid

to shake off or let go.

I mean, sometimes I feel like we'll never be rid

of these men who wield these lies,

who lord their power over those with less power

just so they could fill that void,

the godless hole where there used

to be faith in their lives, all their lives,

all of our lives maybe.

Maybe, you know, maybe the question shouldn't be,

"why can't I sleep?"

Maybe it should be, "how can everybody else?"

What?

- Nothing.

- I grant you permission to react to my screed.

- I don't disagree, but it's, it's just a lot.

- Doesn't make it any less true.

- Yeah, but that's a lot to carry at 5:00 a.m.

- Somebody has to carry it. - Eh.

- That's a lax attitude.

- I didn't mean it like that.

You know what?

I stand by what I said.

it's a lot for one person alone

to carry at 5:00 a.m.

I get that there are battles to be waged,

but you can't fight if you can't stand.

- Well, I wasn't trying to carry it alone.

I'm talking to you.

It's easier to get going when it's this quiet out.

I mean, to start your day.

- Sometimes, but today is easier.

I know.

Too soon, Zach Bell.

You don't know that I was going to say that.

- You weren't?

- Maybe.

It's all a little weird.

- What, this? - Yeah.

- Hm.

So, would it be better that we stop,

go back home to the TV so we can scroll through

the wasteland of predawn social media?

- Point taken. - Uh huh, okay.

Light enough for the park?

- Yes, I love the park in the early morning.

- Me too.

What?

- Oh, wait.

I'm almost ready.

- Kinda early, no?

- You're here, aren't you?

- Good point. - Prime real estate.

- Exactly.

She knows.

So, want to impress your girlfriend, right?

- We just met. - Ah, yeah.

- All more reason to impress.

- I'm not gonna disagree.

- Aren't you gonna be the one impressing the both of us.

What's it gotta do with me?

- Look, boy- - Boy?

What a statement. - I shouldn't have

to explain this to you.

You give me some money.

I play pretty song for lady.

She feels good about it and then they're on about you.

- Except you just robbed all the magic from it.

- There's no magic left in this world.

It's all illusion.

We do this to forget.

- I like her, I'm in. - Jesus.

- Ah, opa. - Are you drunk?

- Are you not drunk?

- Damn, a 20?

- I am worth $100.

- I'm sober.

- Why? - No, I mean, perpetually.

- Why?

- Can you play something sad?

- I'm Russian. - So, yes.

- Why's that?

- I just meant thoughtful, contemplative,

ethereal to match the time of day.

I don't know.

It just seemed quicker to say sad.

- Okay, I play sad.

You add whatever else to it you want.

- What do you do? - For work?

Well, I know what you do for fun.

You stalk women outside bodegas.

Oh, I was there first.

And then you waited for me.

- Do you regret it?

Should I not have? - No.

It's been nice so far.

What do you do?

- I dig pools. - Really?

- No, I'm a writer.

- A real one or like a copywriter?

- Both are real.

And I do both, fiction and copy, a little social.

You don't seem like a social media guy.

Why not?

It's all information at the end of the day.

Most of it fiction.

- Hm, maybe.

Why would you say you dig pools?

- I fell pretty hard for a bartender once.

And when she finally gave me the time of day,

I was with a friend who dug pools.

She was much more interested in him.

- Yeah, well, can you blame her?

There are writers every three feet in Brooklyn.

- The real ones?

- According to your definition.

- Hm, good point.

- I have been known to make them.

- Good points?

Mm, you do seem pretty practical.

- Yeah and that's actually more true of me

than I ever thought that it would be or could be.

Maybe it's something to do with age.

I don't know.

At the same time though, I still feel purposeless.

Maybe it's a generational thing, I don't know.

Can I even help that?

It's not nothing.

- I follow.

- You didn't ask what I do.

- I was gonna get to it.

- I'm a server.

- That's okay.

- Yeah, of course it's okay.

But I don't know if it's necessarily still okay at my age.

And I mean like the way that I do it,

and the places that I do it,

like the pace and stuff, you know?

I can't help but do my best,

which is something that everyone says that they do,

but they don't, they know they could do better.

I don't know, maybe I should do something else.

- So, do something else.

- Oh, God, are you one of those people?

- Okay, I think I know what you mean,

but tell me anyway, what people?

- Just one of those people who thinks it's so easy

to change something as huge as a job

by just saying it.

Gross, I mean, Instagram quotes don't work in real life.

They're just something that people thumb past

so they can get a hit of positivity before they move on

to something that makes them feel bad about themselves,

before moving onto the next thing that makes them

feel good about themselves and so on and so on

to the profit of the same few hundred capitalists.

- Geez. - Sorry.

I have opinions. - Yeah, clearly.

No one asked you to stroll with me.

- That's right.

I was the one that asked you to stroll.

- So, does that reaction mean that you are

one of those types of people?

- Maybe.

I didn't use to be actually.

- What changed?

- The sobriety, I guess.

I think in our society it's not just alcohol

or drugs or debt even,

although that might be the biggest one of them all.

No, no, no, no, no, food probably.

Anyway, you were talking about hits on social media.

Interestingly, I think it got you away from your point.

I think, no offense.

You're onto something there.

Addiction has wormed its way around the American heart.

Like you were saying before, we're a godless people now,

but we're crowded into a cold, otherwise empty church.

So to speak, right?

We were, we were built on religion,

but it's really only ever been about money

and power the whole time.

I don't know, nothing new there, but still,

people used to actually believe it all.

And now, everyone knows it's a farce.

We just don't know what to do about it.

I give you permission to react to my screed.

- Well, I'm glad that you said we by the end of it.

- What do you mean?

- I mean, it's a lot to bite off.

I mean, we were just talking about

the two of us a second ago.

- Wait, you just, you did the same thing earlier.

- Yeah, maybe.

Maybe that's why we're walking alone at night,

awake, complaining while everybody else

sleeps comfortably in their beds.

- Are they comfortable or lulled?

- I don't know.

Even if they are, I wouldn't necessarily blame them.

I don't like being in my thirties and feeling hopeless.

Directionless, purposeless.

I didn't know that you could be content

without being fulfilled.

And to be honest, it brings me joy when I'm working

at the restaurant and a couple or a family

or a single lonely individual comes in

and leaves feeling like they matter to me,

or like they could just forget and receive service.

And most days that's enough.

But then I get home and-

- And who's there to give that feeling to you?

- Yeah.

Yeah, I guess so.

It's TV, by the way.

- What?

- TV is the most prevalent American fiction.

- What about the internet? - Same shit.

- What about movies? - No, movies are great.

Everyone should watch movies all the time.

I can't eat without having coffee first,

but then if I have coffee without eating,

it upsets my stomach.

A vicious cycle that seems backwards.

- It is vicious.

Maybe backwards too, but no less true for it.

I'm a little unnerved, you know?

I'm a little upset by what you said earlier.

- I'm sorry, what did I say?

- About other people's supposedly addictions.

I think it's reductive.

- You joined the conversation.

- Well, I mean, that doesn't mean that I agree

with your whole thesis.

And maybe I went along with it at first

because of how vocal you were,

but you don't, you don't agree?

You think that what you said is fine.

- I don't know if it's fine or not fine.

It's just the way I see it.

As far as whether I'm being unfairly reductive,

I don't think so, no.

I just tend to think things are more simple

generally than we allow.

A lot of the time what we take for nuance

for me feels like evasion.

Does that make more sense in the context of what I said?

I, it's not necessarily hopeless.

It's just realism.

- No, I don't like any of that either.

.

People do have faith that life does have more of a purpose

than chasing some chemical hit in the brain.

You think that's funny?

- No, no, no, it's not.

- I just don't understand what you think gives you

the right to judge others.

- It's not judgment- - Isn't it?

- Necessarily.

I really didn't mean to upset you.

- What did you mean then?

Why did you even say it?

It isn't a solution is it?

- I was talking, sharing.

It's my experience.

I don't know that we're saying

different things overall really.

I used to overthink.

I tend to do that now.

.

I'm especially sensitive.

We talked about that before too,

but I think most people are like that.

Whether they accept it or not or like it or not.

And I understand it is scary.

Life, the idea of life is frightening.

It's death's mirror, right?

So, even though I enjoy being alive, it's...

It's also a struggle.

Because what's on the other side is always-

- The unknown.

- Yeah.

- But that's ego that you're talking about.

- Yeah, you're right about that.

Again, I think we're coming to the same conclusion

from different perspectives.

- No, I don't think that we are.

I don't draw conclusions upon other people's experiences

or my perceptions of them.

I don't generalize.

You know what? - Ah, wow.

- I really don't like this.

- Sophia, i- - I know, you've explained.

- Is there addiction in your family or something?

- I don't know.

Yes, maybe, I don't know.

- I'm sorry I upset you.

I really didn't mean to.

In fact, I probably was trying to impress you.

- Don't, just be normal.

You're not an accordion player.

Thank you for apologizing.

I'm sorry too, I didn't, I don't know why I got so upset.

I just- - It's fine.

- We can keep walking if you want.

- Okay.

Is there anything more specific

that you wanna talk about? - Not today.

- Okay, okay.

Gonna need more coffee soon.

- Yeah, yeah, I could.

I could use more coffee.

Let's go.

Kind of like a bagel sandwich in there, you know?

Between the coffees in your belly.

- You're really weird, dude.

- I've been told. - And it's entirely accurate.

I mean, it would be more, less like a sandwich

and more like a brown, wet, chewed up mess and goo.

Yeah, I know, I know.

la, la, la, la, la, la

- Morning, guys. - Good morning.

Do you know what you want? - Uh.

- Half-caf Americana was cinnamon.

- I'm gonna pretend you didn't just do that.

Um...

- Hey, no, no, no, I got it.

That's okay, I can pay for the coffees.

You don't have to.

I like reversing gender norms.

- Damn.

- Plus I like getting extra punches on my punch card.

- Give me that card.

I will have an oat milk latte also with cinnamon.

- Got it.

Two.

- Thanks. - You're welcome.

- You have a really nice voice.

- And you have beautiful eyes.

- Well, thank you.

- Thanks.

- Uh, I think that the barista was um, what?

- You know what you just did, right?

- I made it into a date.

- Mm, kinda. - Yeah.

Well, things like that are pretty fluid nowadays, huh?

I decided that I was going to shift things

into that zone after I got upset with you

or that I would be okay if you decided to shift things

into that zone because I didn't really care, but I did care.

I don't know, but I figured that you wouldn't

have made the next move because you seem

to genuinely get upset about the fact that I was upset

about like the men stuff.

And so, I got really confused in my head

and I just decided to say, why not, right?

Just why not show that you're interested in him.

Is that okay? - Yeah.

If I can follow.

I followed it.

- I'm gonna get us a table.

- Do you open up here alone?

- Oh yeah, that little turd that's supposed

to be here is always late.

Oh, that's not fair.

- Nope. - Well, fuck that guy.

- Believe me, he's tried.

Ooh, is he cute?

- I haven't decided yet.

- Oh, that doesn't bode well.

You're hot, you should be picky.

Thank you.

- Is it okay if I eat my bagel in here?

It's from another place, but it's only half.

- You can eat whatever you want.

We don't do bagels. - Okay.

Thanks. - Oh and when you're done

with whatever this is, come find me.

Okay? - Yeah.

- If you were stranded on a desert island

and could only bring- - Oh, I hate these.

- And could only bring three books, what would they be?

- Okay, um...

"Moby Dick." - Fine, approved.

- No comments.

- Sorry.

- "Moby Dick," "The Long Goodbye,"

and a comprehensive manual on DIY ship building.

- No one ever says that.

That's what I always say.

Nice job, Zachary.

- Eh, Zach. - Okay, yeah, sorry.

I hate it when people call me Sophie.

It's so diminutive.

Diminutizing?

You get what I mean.

- Zachary sounds pretentious.

- Oh, you did bring "Moby Dick" to an island.

- Wait, what's the scenario that leads to this circumstance?

Did someone kidnap me in the middle

of a purchase at a bookstore?

I mean, how many bookstores are by the sea?

How many bookstores are- - Oh.

are still are still around.

- All right. - Period.

- Okay. - Anyway.

- All right, I am sure there are bookstores and libraries

and other places that have books in them near the sea.

- Oh, well, fine, okay. - Mm hm.

- But the salt air can't be good for the pages.

- Maybe they're eBooks. - Ah, I hope not.

- Okay, in this scenario your eBook reader

would be perpetually charged.

- Okay, then I would be able to get more than three books.

- No. - That doesn't make sense.

- Well, it's my question.

What's "The Long Goodbye?"

- Oh, Raymond Chandler. - Mm hm.

- It's technically a classic detective novel,

but actually a remarkable exploration of the self,

the alcoholic self really by a tortured, brilliant mind.

- And you relate to this tortured, brilliant mind?

- I don't know.

I used to. - And now?

- And now I wish I never had an alcoholic mind at all.

- But you do.

- You're right, I do.

And I didn't even mean that.

I'm grateful for my past.

- That's very mature of you.

- Is it? - I think so.

- Are you grateful for yours?

- Sure, what other choice do I have?

Well, there's bitterness.

- Mm, tried it.

Too depressing.

Mm, disappointment.

- Tried that too.

Very unproductive.

- Am I supposed to react to that?

- You know you find it gross.

- It just looks like oatmeal.

- And oatmeal is gross looking.

- I don't have to. - That is unfair.

I answered about the books.

- You had an answer.

I don't really listen to all that much music.

- That's impossible.

Don't be embarrassed.

- I'm not embarrassed. - Uh huh, okay.

- Fine, Joni Mitchell's "Blue."

Solid, I think.

- You don't listen to her?

- I have, but not a full album all the way through.

Oh, you've probably heard all her songs.

- Quite possible. - Yeah.

I mean, I have an upstairs neighbor who is like 20 years old

and I literally hear her playing the album all the time.

- There you go, there's an answer.

All right and I won't even make you name two more.

- I guess so. - Uh huh.

What kind of music do you listen to?

- Uh huh, hugely eclectic.

I listen to a little bit of mostly everything.

- Even metal? - Even metal!

- Gross.

All right.

- You didn't have to pay for the coffee.

- Oh, it's fine.

I have plenty of money. - Oh, oh, oh.

How nice. - Oh, please.

Was it family money?

- No, everyone always thinks that.

- Sorry. - It's fine, I get it.

I'm an anomaly.

Well, my parents did pay for my school,

which they paid for half and I earned the other half.

And then I paid my expenses.

- Well, that's not nothing, no.

No, it's not nothing.

- How did you make your fortune then?

- Oh, it is not a fortune.

No, I just, I have savings

that I don't have to touch very often

because I have a job that covers most of my expenses.

And I've made some spending money

in recent years off of my portfolio.

Mm.

- I had a shitty high paying job for a few shit years,

and I didn't spend any of the money that I made.

And it was a very lonely strategy, but also a sound one.

Especially given the economy after the recession.

- Look at you.

I wouldn't even know where to start with investments.

- Oh, that's how they want you to be, in the dark.

But it really is quite easy once you learn

to frame your financial life in a way

that allows you to make steady contributions

in amounts that make a difference.

What?

- You are smart. - Yeah, yeah.

Your response is somewhat sexist.

- I wasn't being- - Weren't you?

- I don't know, maybe.

- Huh, oh, well there you go.

That is improvement.

I don't know, maybe.

Now you are ahead of 70%

of the rest of the men in the world.

I will continue to educate you on the basis of this promise.

- Huh.

- Makeover reality shows are a near unimpeachable argument

for universal basic income.

- Yeah and extended vacation leave and paid time off.

- Yes, yes!

Speaking of, I need to go serve Mimosas for tips right now.

- Ah, sorry. - Yeah, I know.

Could be worse.

- Indeed.

- Do you wanna walk home with me?

I mean, I was gonna like shower and everything,

but I don't think that I have the time.

And so, I'm just gonna freshen up and stuff.

- I'd love to come.

- Great.

Well then, let's go, nerd.

- I'm really glad we've learned to embrace

our sleeplessness today.

- Oh, my God.

- I miss weed. - I don't.

- Oh, you stopped too?

- No.

I mean, I miss it since yesterday.

Hey, can I have your number?

- Uh, yeah. - There you are.

- Oh, wow, that was fast.

- Why do you think I asked?

- I mean, I know why you asked,

but you could have played it a little cooler.

- Yeah, you haven't played it so cool so far.

- Yes, I have.

- Mm, yeah, maybe. - Uh huh.

Yeah, I have. - Mm hm.

- I mean, I am always cool.

What applies to me doesn't always apply to others, so.

- Interesting. - Yeah.

- Yeah, yeah. - I am, thank you.

- Mm hm. - Woo, here you go.

I saved it under a pseudonym.

So, once you figure that out,

then maybe I'll go out with you.

- Oh.

- I can't really entertain you much while I'm getting ready.

You understand? - No problem.

- Yeah. - I don't have to do anything.

I can just hang out.

- Well, thanks for tagging along.

- Sure.

- It is easier being up this early with someone else around.

Um, there's water and stuff in the fridge if you want.

You can make coffee also.

- Oh, no, I'm good for now. - Okay, all right.

- Um, don't snoop too much.

.

when we were anonymous

you loved me for who I am

time when were anonymous

- Did you make toast?

- Yeah.

Sorry.

- It's okay.

Don't judge my library.

- I wasn't.

You can tell a lot about a person by which books they keep.

They're the type to keep only some books versus too many.

- Take anything you'd like.

- And do you think people find all of those?

You don't think that there's a surplus

or that some of those books die on those streets,

get sent to the dump?

- What are you saying?

It sounds cynical.

You're kind of a contradiction, you know?

- I know, hm.

I just worry that we've devalued true information,

full stories, a kind of deep dive into knowledge,

truth in general really,

to satisfy the need for more always.

It's always more, more, now regardless of usefulness,

decreasingly with a regard for quality,

it's all about that same thing we've been talking about.

That temporary charge over and over again.

So, more and more books get made to fill the need.

Throw the old ones away without processing them.

So, if there are only a few universal truths

or stories out there, the ones that get made today

get so watered down, they're hardly anything.

Fluff.

- You think a lot about things that are way

outside your personal orbit.

- Huh, maybe.

I mean, I think this last thing

was in my personal orbit though.

- If you publish books, have you published a book?

- No.

Soon, I hope.

- Good luck.

I'd give your book a try.

- Thanks. - Yeah.

Just a try.

If it got too dark, I'd put it down.

- Aha, then you'd put it down too soon.

- Good enough?

- More than.

- Easy, killer, I already gave you my number.

- Yeah, sort of.

- Okay, ready to go?

- Uh, yeah.

It doesn't look like two people live here.

- Uh, I live alone.

- You said you texted your roommate.

- Yeah, I texted my sister a bunch of random letters.

I wasn't worried.

- Then why do it at all?

- Well, it was fun to mess with you and her.

I mean, she will not understand what is happening

when she wakes up later and her reaction

will give me some sort of amusement

in the middle of my shift.

Sorry.

Crap, is that the time?

It's actually pretty early.

I, I coulda showered.

- Oh, you still can if you want.

- No, Zach Bell. - Oh, too soon?

- Yes. - Mm hm.

- Um, do you wanna chill for a minute in my garden?

- Ooh, too soon, Sophia what's your last name?

- What?

Oh, hilarious.

Hilarious.

Come with me.

Come on. - Too soon again.

- Yeah.

- This is all yours?

Yeah.

It's the one thing I spend extra money on.

- Strong move. - Yeah, I know.

- This is unheard of. - I know.

- Can I? - Yeah, of course.

I mean, most people are amazed, but you're almost gleeful.

- Well, I don't get out enough.

You know, in nature.

- We live right by the park.

You were just there.

- Yeah, I'm there all the time, but this is different.

This is, this is private, intimate.

It's got like this feeling, you know?

- Yeah.

Oh, wow.

Um, you sure you don't want any coffee?

- Yeah, can you do a decaf or half?

- Yeah. - Thanks.

Um, decaf or half?

- Oh, half, half, sorry.

- Okay. - Thanks.

- Mm hm, sure.

- I hope we don't lose it all.

- What?

Trees and everything. - Yeah.

- Yeah.

We won't.

- You believe that? - Yeah.

We won't lose all of it if we're careful,

but the fighting is going to get worse until it gets better.

And who knows how much of it will survive.

- The planet?

- As we know it.

Yeah.

What are you gonna do the rest of the day?

I'm going to have breakfast at your restaurant.

You are not.

Nah, I don't know.

Take a nap, clean my room, catch a movie.

Do you live alone too?

Yeah, yeah actually, I do.

You find it hard living alone?

Yes and no.

Mostly yes, but the no is the strongest no of all of them.

- What does that mean?

- I treasure my independence.

- Is that why you're still single?

- What makes you think I'm single?

- Uh-

- Oh, I'm just kidding.

I'm single, I'm single.

Yeah, I mean, I guess that's the reason.

Yes and no.

Maybe it is the reason.

It shouldn't be, but it might be.

- They're all crazy.

The guys that, that haven't held on to you.

- Cute. - Oh, God.

- What?

Are you one of those guys that

doesn't like being called cute?

It is a good thing. - I don't know.

Between that and what you said in the coffee shop.

- What did I say?

- Suggesting I wasn't gonna make a move.

Whereas I was the one who asked you to hang out

in the first place and asked you for your number.

Except- - I was just kidding.

- Ah, no you weren't.

- Oh, okay, well maybe I wasn't,

but I did like notarize our date

and I did give you my number

and I just called you cute and oh, my God, you're right.

You have every reason to be so upset.

- Ah, now you're laughing at me.

- Oh my gosh, honestly enough.

Stop it.

- Slow down. - No, red flags rising.

Too much history with male sensitivity.

Not my job. - Sophia, I'm sorry.

Hey, hey, I am, I'm sorry.

We both got some stuff, I guess.

- You are really sensitive.

- Yeah, double-edged sword.

- Me too.

I mean, I'm really sensitive too.

Usually not the best combination.

- No, not usually.

I'm decisive too, you know?

- Okay. - Where at counts.

- I believe you. - Thank you.

I don't know why you're making this so difficult.

- Oh, my God.

Are you proving the point that I just made

about the men that I've dated?

That was fast. - Hold, hold, hold on.

Hold on, okay?

Counter question, are you maybe creating the circumstances

to make me prove your point?

Maybe even just a little bit.

- I don't know.

It's possible.

- Why did you make your phone number a game?

- I don't know.

- I'm sorry.

You didn't do anything.

- Maybe I did.

Either way I'm sorry.

- You apologize a lot.

- Red flag?

- No.

Well, I mean, to be determined.

I'm sorry, I've been pushing you away all morning.

I don't know what's gotten into me.

Maybe, maybe this isn't a good idea.

Maybe we're too alike. - I don't think so.

- Well, we've established that we're both sensitive people.

And I think also we've established that we both have more

than a few hangups and we both can't sleep.

- That's about it as far as challenges though.

So far. - So far.

- So far.

Still, we've known each other less than four hours.

We could be the perfect Venn diagram of suitability.

Huh?

There's only one way to find out.

Look, maybe we're supposed to date.

All right, help each other I don't know, sleep easier.

Despite all the shit that's going on

in our lives and in the world.

- Our lives aren't that bad.

- Everyone needs people.

- Yeah, okay.

- Anyway.

Is it this way?

- Yeah. - All right.

- You want some mints? - Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Hold on.

So, I was thinking.

You ever hear that thing that you're the average

of the five people you spend the most time with?

- Yeah, sure. - Who are your people?

- My coworkers, my sister if you count the phone,

and my therapist.

- Ah. - What about you?

My boss, my sponsor, therapist,

my brother if you count the phone.

- That's only four. - And coffee.

For real though.

I have an open slot, I guess.

- Not today you don't.

Our grand adventure comes rapidly to an end.

- Mm. - Work.

- Yeah, you joke, but I did have a great time.

- Yeah, me too.

It wasn't boring.

- Good?

- Yeah, it was very random.

- Ah, yeah, yeah, true.

- I actually have a few minutes before I have to be in.

Do you wanna sit for a bit over there?

- Yeah, sure. - Okay, cool.

Can you hold my compact for me?

Like that.

Should I put on makeup?

- I don't think you need it.

- Right.

I don't feel like putting any on.

- So, don't.

- A made up Sophia makes more tips.

.

- What?

- It doesn't seem to, I don't know,

align with your perspective.

Also, it's an ironic turn of phrase.

Capitalistically speaking.

Yeah, it kind of goes back to a part

of our conversation before, fiction being reality.

- Whatever.

I have some tinted moisturizer I can use

to smooth things out later.

Also, by the way,

I can be a woman who cares about her appearance

while also rejecting the bullshit that is classically

assigned to the identity of womanhood.

- Sure, I know. - Mm hm.

- I just like who you appear to be.

Okay?

All right.

This could also be something that,

that is none of my business, but-

- Oh boy. - No, no, no, no.

I'm just thinking about your difficulty

with the desert island album question

and knowing what to do while sitting on

what sounds like some savings.

You should travel.

No, I mean, since you can.

That's what a lot of people would do if they had the means.

- I have and I will travel more.

For now though, I like it where I am.

I mean, I don't love my job,

and I would like some more purpose,

but that's not everything.

I mean, the day-to-day here is pretty good,

and that's not necessarily something to mess with.

- Hm. - Besides, I mean,

I can't, you know, just jump around from place to place,

avoiding the questions of my life.

- Yeah.

But wouldn't travel help you sleep though?

- Well, exhaustion isn't the same as sleeping healthy.

- Ah, I guess that might be true.

I'm exhausted a lot of the time and I don't sleep.

- Maybe you're supposed to find out something.

Maybe you should travel.

- Uh, same answer.

I have, I will.

But I like it here right now.

And I don't have the means necessarily.

- Something to work towards. - Yeah.

Oh, maybe you could volunteer or work for a nonprofit.

I don't know.

- Yeah, maybe.

I don't know what I'd be good at though.

- Talk to the people like you talk to me.

- Yeah, maybe. - Mm hm.

- Boobies O'Shaughnessy.

- What? - Boobies O'Shaughnessy.

That's the name I put in your phone with my number.

- Huh?

That certainly would have stuck out.

- Yeah, that's why they call her boobies.

- Don't.

- I really don't wanna go to- - Hey, Sophia.

- Hi, Lisa.

- I'll see you inside. - Yup.

call in sick, call in sick

Is that your manager? - Yup.

- Huh, you should go in and puke

wet, brown bagel all over her.

- Yeah, no.

I mean, I mean, I do wanna hang out, but not that badly.

- All right. - Gross.

Okay.

Dirty butt?

- Uh, a little, a little bit.

- Yeah. - Mm hm.

- Yeah, go ahead.

Utility purposes only.

- Okay, um.

- Weirdest date ever.

Okay, all right.

- All right. - Yeah.

- How about my butt? - Yeah, I mean it's dirty,

but you don't have to go to work.

So, it doesn't matter.

- I'm not walking around with a dirty butt.

Come on now.

Come on, come on.

Okay, see- - All right, all right.

- You're being a little nice to it, but all right.

Thank you for cleaning my butt.

- Okay.

So, du-du-du-da, it was-

- Oh, do- - What?

- Do you wanna hang out tonight?

- Oh, um, maybe.

I'll text you.

- Um, you don't have my number.

- So, text me first, dingus.

- I'm never changing Boobies O'Shaughnessy in my phone.

- Yes, you will. - Mm mm, no.

- Oh yeah. - No.

- It's got a little heart emoji.

- Yes, boobies.

- Okay, well, it was a nice meeting you.

- Yeah, likewise, Boobies.

- Zach, all right, okay.

You, enough already.

You knifed it.

You killed the joke. - Okay, okay, okay.

- It's done, it's dead. - Okay, sorry, sorry.

- It's okay.

Okay, so I...

I will talk to you later.

- Okay. - I'm gonna...

- All right, I'm just gonna go-

- Yeah. - This way.

- Okay. - Have fun at work.

- Yeah, hm. - Okay.

- Hey, thanks for the help with the door by the way.

Who's the serious guy?

Oh, it's not serious.

- No, I meant- - We just met, so.

I meant it looks like he takes things seriously.

- Oh, yeah.

Yeah, that's probably accurate.

- Okay, so for today, I think if we just really get started-

- I sort of too though. - You what?

- I take things seriously. - I don't know.

I think it kinda depends.

Okay, so, for today, maybe if we just get started-

- You know what, I need to find out.

What do you mean?

- I need to find out who he is.

- What, where are you going for today?

- I mean, oh gosh.

I'm so sorry, I'm sick.

- You're definitely 1,000% not sick-

- Yeah, yeah, yeah. - At all.

- Yeah, no, I am.

I'm so sorry. - Nope, talk to him later.

- I've gotta go.

I don't want to.

- Okay, this is not okay.

- Yeah, I'm so sorry.

- You're fucking me before the day has even started.

Oh, I know, I'm sorry.

- I'm pissed but exceedingly curious.

- Zach, Zach!

Zach!

tired of kicking home alone

nothing left to talk about