Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:02:13,742 --> 00:02:17,504
"Old Lady Spinster,"
her guest hissed,
2
00:02:17,528 --> 00:02:21,378
as he begged for his life.
3
00:02:21,402 --> 00:02:24,381
If you listen closely,
4
00:02:24,405 --> 00:02:29,081
you can still hear the
cries of her victims.
5
00:02:32,326 --> 00:02:33,651
The cries of her victims!
6
00:02:33,675 --> 00:02:38,134
- Beware!
- Beware!
7
00:02:38,158 --> 00:02:43,661
Beware, beware!
8
00:02:43,685 --> 00:02:45,053
Beware!
9
00:02:47,167 --> 00:02:48,274
But you still have
two nights left
10
00:02:48,298 --> 00:02:49,797
on your reservation!
11
00:02:49,821 --> 00:02:51,712
I told you we should've
gone to Dollywood!
12
00:02:51,736 --> 00:02:54,454
Who would want to stay
here? These people are frauds!
13
00:03:03,661 --> 00:03:05,813
This fake blood sure stains.
14
00:03:05,837 --> 00:03:07,685
How grandmother was
able to get real blood
15
00:03:07,709 --> 00:03:09,469
out of this carpet,
I'll never know.
16
00:03:09,493 --> 00:03:11,036
Right?
17
00:03:11,060 --> 00:03:13,691
Hey, Granny, share with
us your secret, would ya?
18
00:03:13,715 --> 00:03:15,736
I mean, give us some
of that sage advice.
19
00:03:15,760 --> 00:03:17,347
"Sell the house!
20
00:03:17,371 --> 00:03:19,566
Change your name
and start a new hotel!"
21
00:03:19,590 --> 00:03:20,828
Wow, did you hear that?
22
00:03:20,852 --> 00:03:23,614
That's some really
good advice there.
23
00:03:23,638 --> 00:03:27,008
- It's not funny, Sam!
- Just show some respect.
24
00:03:27,032 --> 00:03:28,271
Come on, sis, just admit it.
25
00:03:28,295 --> 00:03:30,142
Nobody wants to
stay in a murder house.
26
00:03:30,166 --> 00:03:32,144
This isn't just
some murder house.
27
00:03:32,168 --> 00:03:33,276
This is our house.
28
00:03:33,300 --> 00:03:34,823
- It's morbid!
- It's family.
29
00:03:38,043 --> 00:03:40,674
People like horror.
30
00:03:40,698 --> 00:03:42,328
People like being scared.
31
00:03:42,352 --> 00:03:44,765
- Crazy people.
- Don't.
32
00:03:44,789 --> 00:03:46,289
I'm not saying
you're crazy, I'm just...
33
00:03:46,313 --> 00:03:49,205
Our customers are out there.
34
00:03:49,229 --> 00:03:51,274
We just have to find them.
35
00:03:57,324 --> 00:03:59,824
Look at this.
36
00:03:59,848 --> 00:04:03,001
Lizzie Bord-Inn, booked.
37
00:04:03,025 --> 00:04:05,612
Dahmer Apartment, booked.
38
00:04:05,636 --> 00:04:08,311
John Wayne Gacy
Circus Tent, booked.
39
00:04:08,335 --> 00:04:10,313
Us, nothing.
40
00:04:10,337 --> 00:04:13,881
What is it gonna take
to get us on the map?
41
00:04:13,905 --> 00:04:18,277
Grandmother was America's
first female serial killer.
42
00:04:18,301 --> 00:04:20,216
That's a big deal.
43
00:04:22,523 --> 00:04:24,718
If only the world knew you
were so groundbreaking.
44
00:04:24,742 --> 00:04:27,765
And so psychotic.
45
00:04:27,789 --> 00:04:30,463
- What up, killers?
- It's TheMorgueCases.
46
00:04:30,487 --> 00:04:32,639
Today I got to check
another crime scene
47
00:04:32,663 --> 00:04:35,338
off my mass murder bucket
list and spent the night
48
00:04:35,362 --> 00:04:39,472
in Jeffrey Dahmer's
apartment. It was so great!
49
00:04:39,496 --> 00:04:42,170
That's it! Influencers.
50
00:04:42,194 --> 00:04:46,827
I need stupid, vapid, "Like
and Subscribe" influencers.
51
00:04:46,851 --> 00:04:50,135
Okay, we reach out to this
girl. We offer her a free night.
52
00:04:50,159 --> 00:04:52,703
We wine and dine
and frighten her,
53
00:04:52,727 --> 00:04:56,513
and then, boom, positive review.
54
00:04:58,602 --> 00:05:00,082
You lost me at "free."
55
00:05:04,216 --> 00:05:06,325
I'm at the Spinster
Murder House,
56
00:05:06,349 --> 00:05:08,806
and if you've never heard
of it, don't be ashamed.
57
00:05:08,830 --> 00:05:11,635
This one is a deep cut,
even for The Morgue.
58
00:05:11,659 --> 00:05:13,463
The story goes
that 80 years ago,
59
00:05:13,487 --> 00:05:16,596
Old Lady Spinster, the
proprietor of this hotel,
60
00:05:16,620 --> 00:05:19,382
murdered an untold
number of guests.
61
00:05:19,406 --> 00:05:23,168
After confessing to her crimes,
she died in an insane asylum.
62
00:05:23,192 --> 00:05:25,344
No. Hi.
63
00:05:25,368 --> 00:05:28,391
Actually, she did not
die in an insane asylum.
64
00:05:28,415 --> 00:05:31,742
She died peacefully
in a retirement home.
65
00:05:31,766 --> 00:05:33,831
And this, my morbid viewers,
66
00:05:33,855 --> 00:05:36,399
is Lady Spinster's
own granddaughter.
67
00:05:36,423 --> 00:05:41,360
- That's me, proud Spinster.
- The name, not the other way.
68
00:05:41,384 --> 00:05:44,711
- You know how it is, Morgan.
- Call me Morgue.
69
00:05:44,735 --> 00:05:46,931
Now, you inherited this
place from your grandmother?
70
00:05:46,955 --> 00:05:49,044
Yes, we did, my brother and I.
71
00:05:52,308 --> 00:05:53,938
Hi.
72
00:05:53,962 --> 00:05:56,201
Go ahead and say hi to
our viewers, Mr. Spinster.
73
00:05:56,225 --> 00:05:58,682
Are they, she's live right now?
74
00:05:58,706 --> 00:06:01,859
- Yeah, but don't worry.
- This is my BTS stream.
75
00:06:01,883 --> 00:06:05,993
Only a few thousand
people are watching.
76
00:06:06,017 --> 00:06:10,128
Um, welcome to the
Spinster Murder House!
77
00:06:10,152 --> 00:06:13,000
This way to the deception den.
78
00:06:17,942 --> 00:06:19,572
Ooh!
79
00:06:19,596 --> 00:06:22,532
The house got gift
points for creep factor.
80
00:06:22,556 --> 00:06:24,534
Grandmother designed it herself.
81
00:06:24,558 --> 00:06:26,797
Some even say the
house drove her to kill.
82
00:06:26,821 --> 00:06:28,364
No, they don't.
83
00:06:28,388 --> 00:06:30,366
You have a shrine of her?
84
00:06:30,390 --> 00:06:33,958
I love it! It's so trashy.
85
00:06:36,396 --> 00:06:40,419
Wow. It's working!
86
00:06:40,443 --> 00:06:43,466
The stream dropped.
87
00:06:43,490 --> 00:06:45,555
That's the steel
panels in the walls.
88
00:06:45,579 --> 00:06:47,208
Grandmother had them installed.
89
00:06:47,232 --> 00:06:49,210
To muffle the
screams of her victims.
90
00:06:49,234 --> 00:06:53,954
- My god.
- That's horrible.
91
00:06:53,978 --> 00:06:55,632
Is there Wi-Fi?
92
00:06:58,940 --> 00:07:01,397
This place sure is a maze.
93
00:07:01,421 --> 00:07:03,834
That's the whole point, dear.
94
00:07:03,858 --> 00:07:06,489
You see, grandmother designed
the architecture of this house
95
00:07:06,513 --> 00:07:10,231
to confuse and
then trap her victims.
96
00:07:14,651 --> 00:07:16,368
See, that's what
happens to guests
97
00:07:16,392 --> 00:07:17,717
when they break the house rules.
98
00:07:17,741 --> 00:07:19,806
Rules?
99
00:07:19,830 --> 00:07:22,243
My grandmother was very strict.
100
00:07:22,267 --> 00:07:25,246
Rule number one, no smoking.
101
00:07:30,841 --> 00:07:32,689
And then there's
rule number two,
102
00:07:32,713 --> 00:07:35,126
absolutely no feet
on the furniture.
103
00:07:41,852 --> 00:07:45,223
And of course, and
most importantly,
104
00:07:45,247 --> 00:07:47,486
rule number three
105
00:07:47,510 --> 00:07:49,836
- No noise after dark.
- No!
106
00:07:54,256 --> 00:07:57,278
The blood of everyone who
broke grandmother's rules
107
00:07:57,302 --> 00:08:01,369
still stains the
walls of this house.
108
00:08:01,393 --> 00:08:04,982
- Looks more like rust.
- Do you have leaky pipes?
109
00:08:05,006 --> 00:08:08,333
No. No, no, no,
no, no. That's blood.
110
00:08:08,357 --> 00:08:09,900
Well, then, what
happened to the bodies?
111
00:08:09,924 --> 00:08:11,292
They never found them.
112
00:08:11,316 --> 00:08:12,729
Then how do you know it's true?
113
00:08:12,753 --> 00:08:14,252
Because she confessed.
114
00:08:14,276 --> 00:08:15,645
If there's no body,
then there's no murder.
115
00:08:15,669 --> 00:08:17,473
That's like True Crime 101.
116
00:08:17,497 --> 00:08:19,257
Perhaps she fed
them to her victims.
117
00:08:19,281 --> 00:08:20,563
And the bones?
118
00:08:20,587 --> 00:08:21,781
They were tossed
down this corpse chute
119
00:08:21,805 --> 00:08:25,045
to a secret basement below.
120
00:08:25,069 --> 00:08:29,920
- That's just a dumbwaiter.
- Or a dead waiter.
121
00:08:29,944 --> 00:08:33,619
I don't know. It just
seems a little thin.
122
00:08:33,643 --> 00:08:35,054
What's that supposed to mean?
123
00:08:35,078 --> 00:08:37,405
It's just, I've studied
every serial killer
124
00:08:37,429 --> 00:08:40,669
from John Eric Armstrong
to Kevin Lee Zimmerman,
125
00:08:40,693 --> 00:08:42,498
and I've never heard
of the Spinster case
126
00:08:42,522 --> 00:08:43,933
until you emailed me.
127
00:08:43,957 --> 00:08:45,805
How do you know she wasn't
just some crazy old woman
128
00:08:45,829 --> 00:08:47,285
who built a wonky house?
129
00:08:47,309 --> 00:08:50,636
You have no idea what
you're talking about.
130
00:08:50,660 --> 00:08:54,074
I mean, grandmother was
a world-class serial killer,
131
00:08:54,098 --> 00:08:55,598
and I'll bet if she
was here right now,
132
00:08:55,622 --> 00:08:57,101
she'd hack you to pieces!
133
00:09:02,367 --> 00:09:04,084
What she meant was
if you need anything,
134
00:09:04,108 --> 00:09:05,108
let us know.
135
00:09:16,599 --> 00:09:19,143
This house is definitely spooky,
136
00:09:19,167 --> 00:09:21,319
but I don't know
about the owners.
137
00:09:21,343 --> 00:09:23,016
They're kinda creepy,
138
00:09:23,040 --> 00:09:25,410
and I don't mean
creepy in a fun way.
139
00:09:25,434 --> 00:09:27,479
Like, sad creepy.
140
00:09:31,005 --> 00:09:33,374
- "There's no body.
- There's no murder."
141
00:09:33,398 --> 00:09:35,072
Can you believe her?
142
00:09:35,096 --> 00:09:37,335
Accusing dear old grandmother
of not killing anyone?
143
00:09:37,359 --> 00:09:39,032
Just stop complaining, okay?
144
00:09:39,056 --> 00:09:43,341
We're not doing this for her.
We're doing it for her viewers.
145
00:09:45,019 --> 00:09:46,605
Whoa.
146
00:09:46,629 --> 00:09:49,434
What the hell's happening
with our reservations?
147
00:09:49,458 --> 00:09:52,132
I bet it's her.
148
00:09:52,156 --> 00:09:55,048
So far the only thing I'm
sure Old Lady Spinster killed
149
00:09:55,072 --> 00:09:56,833
is my vacation.
150
00:09:56,857 --> 00:10:00,663
This little brat
is gonna ruin us.
151
00:10:00,687 --> 00:10:03,970
No, she isn't.
152
00:10:19,096 --> 00:10:22,598
You're just in
time for breakfast.
153
00:10:22,622 --> 00:10:24,687
I made some sausage and eggs.
154
00:10:24,711 --> 00:10:27,559
I'm vegan. I think
meat is murder.
155
00:10:27,583 --> 00:10:28,908
I thought you liked murder.
156
00:10:28,932 --> 00:10:31,563
Well, yeah, but just people.
157
00:10:33,589 --> 00:10:35,698
Also, the Wi-Fi's down.
158
00:10:35,722 --> 00:10:37,961
Yes, that, um, I've
actually been on the phone
159
00:10:37,985 --> 00:10:40,267
all morning with
the repair company,
160
00:10:40,291 --> 00:10:42,705
and waiting, you know how it is.
161
00:10:42,729 --> 00:10:46,012
- Right.
- Well, thanks.
162
00:10:49,561 --> 00:10:54,412
Hey, I wanted to apologize
if I upset you yesterday.
163
00:10:54,436 --> 00:10:56,719
I'm just a stickler for
details, you know?
164
00:10:56,743 --> 00:10:58,068
Don't mention it.
165
00:10:58,092 --> 00:10:59,635
Yeah, I understand that
you true crime people,
166
00:10:59,659 --> 00:11:01,637
you have to ask
a lot of questions.
167
00:11:01,661 --> 00:11:03,987
I think that we should
keep an open mind,
168
00:11:04,011 --> 00:11:05,815
which is why I was thinking
169
00:11:05,839 --> 00:11:08,252
maybe we could do a
little investigating today.
170
00:11:08,276 --> 00:11:10,123
What kind of investigating?
171
00:11:10,147 --> 00:11:12,996
Look around the house
for any unmarked entrances,
172
00:11:13,020 --> 00:11:15,781
hidden doors,
overlooked crawlspaces.
173
00:11:15,805 --> 00:11:17,609
Maybe find where all
those bodies ended up?
174
00:11:17,633 --> 00:11:19,829
The police already did
an extensive search.
175
00:11:19,853 --> 00:11:22,483
Like, years ago,
and I bet back then
176
00:11:22,507 --> 00:11:25,486
they didn't have
stuff like this.
177
00:11:28,165 --> 00:11:31,318
Metal detector.
178
00:11:31,342 --> 00:11:35,279
Ultra-wide band radar scanners.
179
00:11:35,303 --> 00:11:36,957
Infrared camera.
180
00:11:39,742 --> 00:11:42,373
Now, who's ready
to find some bodies?
181
00:11:53,800 --> 00:11:56,953
Look!
182
00:11:56,977 --> 00:11:58,848
Chemical stains.
183
00:12:12,079 --> 00:12:15,972
Grandmother's secret
stash of poisons.
184
00:12:15,996 --> 00:12:18,452
That's her stash
of poisons, all right.
185
00:12:18,476 --> 00:12:20,217
Gin.
186
00:12:23,525 --> 00:12:25,483
Brandy.
187
00:12:31,011 --> 00:12:34,338
- Are these iron walls?
- Like I said, all metal.
188
00:12:34,362 --> 00:12:39,846
You said steel.
189
00:12:42,849 --> 00:12:44,391
Any objection if
I open this wall?
190
00:12:44,415 --> 00:12:45,895
Be my guest.
191
00:13:05,436 --> 00:13:09,025
Looks like some kind of vault.
192
00:13:09,049 --> 00:13:12,811
My god.
193
00:13:12,835 --> 00:13:15,161
This is it.
194
00:13:15,185 --> 00:13:17,579
Grandmother's corpse locker.
195
00:13:21,713 --> 00:13:23,866
You know how to open a safe?
196
00:13:23,890 --> 00:13:26,433
Like I said, I love true crime.
197
00:13:26,457 --> 00:13:29,373
I just know this is where
grandmother hid the bodies.
198
00:13:35,553 --> 00:13:37,531
That should do it.
199
00:13:37,555 --> 00:13:39,882
Would you like to do
the honors, Pamela?
200
00:13:59,664 --> 00:14:01,555
Looks like Old Lady Spinster
201
00:14:01,579 --> 00:14:05,342
was just a spinster.
202
00:14:05,366 --> 00:14:07,561
No.
203
00:14:07,585 --> 00:14:10,042
No, she must've used
this sewing machine
204
00:14:10,066 --> 00:14:12,915
to sew and then wear
the flesh of her victims.
205
00:14:12,939 --> 00:14:15,526
I mean, there could be any
number of torture chambers
206
00:14:15,550 --> 00:14:17,571
or secret passages
in this house, or...
207
00:14:17,595 --> 00:14:19,791
- Just stop, okay? Stop it!
- -doors in this thing.
208
00:14:19,815 --> 00:14:21,097
Or wait, there could
be a latch or something!
209
00:14:21,121 --> 00:14:22,185
There can be...
210
00:14:22,209 --> 00:14:24,230
Face it, Pamela.
211
00:14:24,254 --> 00:14:26,842
Old Lady Spinster
never killed anyone.
212
00:14:26,866 --> 00:14:29,148
- She was just crazy...
- I'm not crazy!
213
00:14:29,172 --> 00:14:31,237
She didn't call you
crazy, Pam, okay?
214
00:14:31,261 --> 00:14:32,586
Now stop it.
215
00:14:32,610 --> 00:14:34,719
Just because we
haven't found any bodies
216
00:14:34,743 --> 00:14:36,764
doesn't mean that
she didn't kill anyone.
217
00:14:36,788 --> 00:14:38,636
She was a homicidal genius!
218
00:14:38,660 --> 00:14:41,813
She was greater than
Wuornos! Greater than Bundy!
219
00:14:41,837 --> 00:14:44,337
You will see the Spinster
name will live forever!
220
00:14:47,234 --> 00:14:49,342
This place is a total scam.
221
00:14:49,366 --> 00:14:51,779
The owners are
complete whack jobs.
222
00:14:51,803 --> 00:14:54,913
One-star rating only
'cause I can't give it zero.
223
00:14:54,937 --> 00:14:58,090
Save the gas money and
avoid the Spinster Murder House.
224
00:14:58,114 --> 00:15:00,900
Trust me, I wouldn't
be caught dead here.
225
00:15:07,384 --> 00:15:09,473
Whatever, I'll stop
at a Starbucks.
226
00:15:19,744 --> 00:15:23,333
- You need to calm down.
- We need her to live document.
227
00:15:23,357 --> 00:15:25,988
You confronting her is
the last thing we need.
228
00:15:26,012 --> 00:15:27,380
I can't believe it.
229
00:15:27,404 --> 00:15:29,121
She doesn't believe any of it.
230
00:15:29,145 --> 00:15:31,297
She's probably giving
us a bad review right now.
231
00:15:31,321 --> 00:15:32,820
Can you blame her?
232
00:15:32,844 --> 00:15:34,910
You're screaming and going
on like some crazy person.
233
00:15:34,934 --> 00:15:38,783
Thank you, Old Lady Spinster.
234
00:15:38,807 --> 00:15:40,872
What is that supposed to mean?
235
00:15:40,896 --> 00:15:42,526
Let's hope you lead to an exit.
236
00:15:42,550 --> 00:15:43,919
The writing's on the wall.
237
00:15:43,943 --> 00:15:45,311
We've been losing money
for the last three years!
238
00:15:45,335 --> 00:15:47,313
The roof leaks,
the plumbing's shot.
239
00:15:47,337 --> 00:15:50,186
- Well, thank you!
- Are you gonna fix it?
240
00:15:50,210 --> 00:15:52,623
Maybe we can get that
little brat to go along.
241
00:15:52,647 --> 00:15:54,016
How are you gonna do that?
242
00:15:54,040 --> 00:15:56,714
Are you gonna threaten
her, or are you gonna pay her
243
00:15:56,738 --> 00:15:59,891
with all the money
we have? Let's face it,
244
00:15:59,915 --> 00:16:02,763
this whole macabre bed
and breakfast thing is doomed.
245
00:16:02,787 --> 00:16:04,896
And frankly, I'm happy that
grandma hasn't killed anybody
246
00:16:04,920 --> 00:16:06,767
'cause now I don't
have to feel guilty over
247
00:16:06,791 --> 00:16:10,032
being a part of
some crazy family!
248
00:16:10,056 --> 00:16:12,643
She wasn't crazy.
249
00:16:12,667 --> 00:16:16,821
This is our home,
Samuel, and I will die before
250
00:16:16,845 --> 00:16:18,954
I let that girl destroy
what we've built.
251
00:16:18,978 --> 00:16:21,869
- You're scaring me.
- Good.
252
00:16:21,893 --> 00:16:25,830
Maybe that's just what
the little bitch needs,
253
00:16:25,854 --> 00:16:28,552
a good scare from an old ghost.
254
00:17:12,117 --> 00:17:15,053
Boy, sure is a good
thing I brought my mace!
255
00:17:15,077 --> 00:17:16,794
It's made with ghost peppers.
256
00:17:16,818 --> 00:17:18,361
You know, to keep
away the ghosts?
257
00:17:18,385 --> 00:17:19,796
What the hell is wrong with you?
258
00:17:19,820 --> 00:17:22,495
Pamela, is that you?
259
00:17:22,519 --> 00:17:24,106
I could've sworn
260
00:17:24,130 --> 00:17:26,021
it was the ghost of
that crazy old lady.
261
00:17:27,523 --> 00:17:32,723
Really? Take a look at yourself.
262
00:17:32,747 --> 00:17:36,838
This isn't a murder
house. It's a crazy house.
263
00:17:43,801 --> 00:17:47,346
Are you recording this?
264
00:17:47,370 --> 00:17:50,045
- Stop it.
- No way.
265
00:17:50,069 --> 00:17:51,524
This might be my
favorite shot of you.
266
00:17:51,548 --> 00:17:53,396
Give me that phone.
267
00:17:53,420 --> 00:17:55,876
Give me that phone!
Give me that phone!
268
00:17:55,900 --> 00:17:57,878
You wanted people to
see Old Lady Spinster?
269
00:17:57,902 --> 00:17:59,228
- Shut up!
- So here she is!
270
00:17:59,252 --> 00:18:00,794
I'm looking right at her,
crazy Old Lady Spinster!
271
00:18:00,818 --> 00:18:03,623
Shut up! You want
a murder house?
272
00:18:08,609 --> 00:18:10,741
Are you out of
your fucking mind?
273
00:18:19,837 --> 00:18:22,468
You can't hide from me.
274
00:18:22,492 --> 00:18:24,233
This is my house.
275
00:18:27,193 --> 00:18:30,302
Beware!
276
00:18:30,326 --> 00:18:32,739
Pam?
277
00:18:39,422 --> 00:18:41,661
Where's the latch?
278
00:18:41,685 --> 00:18:45,100
I know it's here somewhere.
279
00:18:45,124 --> 00:18:46,777
Yes!
280
00:18:58,441 --> 00:19:01,942
Hello, Mr. Modem.
281
00:19:01,966 --> 00:19:04,119
Okay.
282
00:19:06,667 --> 00:19:09,539
- Full signal.
- Let's do this.
283
00:19:13,239 --> 00:19:14,564
Help!
284
00:19:14,588 --> 00:19:17,044
I'm trapped in the
Spinster house!
285
00:19:24,989 --> 00:19:26,706
Somebody call 911!
286
00:19:26,730 --> 00:19:30,536
I'm at the Spinster
house! She's gonna kill me!
287
00:19:43,921 --> 00:19:45,116
Pam.
288
00:19:45,140 --> 00:19:46,683
Isn't this what you
always wanted?
289
00:19:46,707 --> 00:19:48,641
Please, please, I'm sorry, okay?
290
00:19:48,665 --> 00:19:50,643
Some real true
crime in your life?
291
00:19:50,667 --> 00:19:52,906
No!
292
00:20:34,668 --> 00:20:38,300
Sam? We have to
get the carpet cleaned.
293
00:20:38,324 --> 00:20:39,953
I think
294
00:20:39,977 --> 00:20:44,306
I think the hardware
store opens at six.
295
00:20:44,330 --> 00:20:47,831
Sam, I need your help.
296
00:20:47,855 --> 00:20:51,791
- Sam?
- I'm right here, sis.
297
00:20:51,815 --> 00:20:55,578
After all, maybe grandmother
didn't kill anybody,
298
00:20:55,602 --> 00:20:58,668
so we can still make
this a murder house!
299
00:21:14,621 --> 00:21:16,599
- Good afternoon.
- Spinster Murder-Suicide House.
300
00:21:16,623 --> 00:21:19,993
This is Sam. I am
so sorry, ma'am,
301
00:21:20,017 --> 00:21:23,867
but we have no
vacancies until next winter.
302
00:21:23,891 --> 00:21:27,349
That's correct. Thank you, sir.
303
00:21:27,373 --> 00:21:28,785
Well, if you sign up
304
00:21:28,809 --> 00:21:30,743
for our Spinster Murder-Suicide
House mailing list,
305
00:21:30,767 --> 00:21:32,223
you'll be one of
the first notified of
306
00:21:32,247 --> 00:21:35,095
any of our cancellations.
307
00:21:35,119 --> 00:21:36,919
And we look forward to
seeing you too, ma'am.
308
00:21:47,088 --> 00:21:51,155
Well, sis, I hate to admit
it, but you were right.
309
00:21:51,179 --> 00:21:53,897
There's definitely
a market for horror.
310
00:21:55,923 --> 00:21:57,030
No, no, no!
311
00:21:57,054 --> 00:21:58,641
Please don't kill
me, Miss Spinster!
312
00:22:03,713 --> 00:22:07,891
And now to join my
dear grandmother in hell.
313
00:22:48,236 --> 00:22:50,867
Granny really
was a serial killer!
314
00:22:54,155 --> 00:22:58,701
I'm gonna be rich!
315
00:23:40,636 --> 00:23:43,093
There's a new sheriff
in town, Mr. Bug,
316
00:23:43,117 --> 00:23:45,791
and his name's Harlan King.
317
00:23:45,815 --> 00:23:48,315
Requiestcat in
pace, Beetlejuice.
318
00:23:52,779 --> 00:23:55,888
Who's next? You
know what today is?
319
00:23:55,912 --> 00:23:58,413
It's eight-legged
Armageddon day.
320
00:23:58,437 --> 00:24:02,136
Well, now that's
really pretty, little lady.
321
00:24:04,878 --> 00:24:06,508
Time to die.
322
00:24:07,881 --> 00:24:10,250
Pretty shot to hell and gone.
323
00:24:10,274 --> 00:24:12,296
Pretty frickin' dead!
324
00:24:17,847 --> 00:24:18,998
Hello?
325
00:24:20,241 --> 00:24:21,348
King Pest Control?
326
00:24:24,550 --> 00:24:26,136
Shh.
327
00:24:27,204 --> 00:24:28,728
King Pest Control.
328
00:24:43,743 --> 00:24:45,938
"Step into my parlor,"
said the asshole spider
329
00:24:45,962 --> 00:24:48,245
to the terror-dominant fly.
330
00:24:48,269 --> 00:24:52,554
"Why, it's mass insecticide!"
331
00:24:52,578 --> 00:24:54,493
The King has arrived!
332
00:24:57,452 --> 00:25:01,563
Excuse me, Mr. King,
I'm with a patient, working,
333
00:25:01,587 --> 00:25:04,261
- as you're supposed to be.
- I'm done already.
334
00:25:04,285 --> 00:25:07,569
Stinkbugs, spiders,
moths, worms.
335
00:25:07,593 --> 00:25:10,659
Kaput. Just a couple of birds.
336
00:25:10,683 --> 00:25:13,052
Not many. I left
them on the porch.
337
00:25:13,076 --> 00:25:14,967
Please wait in the parlor.
338
00:25:14,991 --> 00:25:17,187
Well, first, I need
you to remit my fee
339
00:25:17,211 --> 00:25:20,146
as per our agreement,
which I believe came before
340
00:25:20,170 --> 00:25:21,670
this easy chair action?
341
00:25:21,694 --> 00:25:23,759
I'll be right with you.
342
00:25:23,783 --> 00:25:26,065
Sorry, I can't bring
all the creepy-crawlies
343
00:25:26,089 --> 00:25:28,590
back to life and kill
'em all over again.
344
00:25:28,614 --> 00:25:31,244
That's not how
that works, doctor.
345
00:25:31,268 --> 00:25:34,378
A little professional courtesy
would be nice, just sayin'.
346
00:25:42,715 --> 00:25:44,083
Now, you and me,
347
00:25:44,107 --> 00:25:45,650
we're kind of in the same
business, aren't we, doc?
348
00:25:45,674 --> 00:25:46,782
Help people eliminate
little problems.
349
00:25:46,806 --> 00:25:49,393
Please stop talking.
350
00:25:49,417 --> 00:25:51,264
Mr. King, I trust
this is the last time
351
00:25:51,288 --> 00:25:52,527
I will ever see you.
352
00:25:52,551 --> 00:25:55,181
Please feel free
to lose my number.
353
00:25:55,205 --> 00:25:56,574
Sure, no problem.
354
00:25:56,598 --> 00:26:02,145
Just, call me whenever
you want me back.
355
00:26:02,169 --> 00:26:05,627
What makes you think I
would ever want you back?
356
00:26:05,651 --> 00:26:08,717
'Cause there's only
one King, and I'm it, doc.
357
00:26:08,741 --> 00:26:12,634
They call back
always. You will too.
358
00:26:12,658 --> 00:26:14,529
Bye-bye.
359
00:26:21,797 --> 00:26:23,819
She doesn't know
who she's talking to.
360
00:26:23,843 --> 00:26:25,932
She doesn't know how
to deal with the public.
361
00:26:34,331 --> 00:26:37,093
"Lose my number!"
362
00:26:37,117 --> 00:26:39,293
Yeah, we'll see about that.
363
00:26:42,818 --> 00:26:44,385
You'll call back.
364
00:26:56,658 --> 00:27:01,770
Roaches check in,
but they don't check out.
365
00:27:03,360 --> 00:27:05,904
All right, you
guys know the drill.
366
00:27:05,928 --> 00:27:08,690
Be fruitful and multiply.
367
00:27:08,714 --> 00:27:10,822
The King has spoken.
368
00:27:20,160 --> 00:27:21,877
Damn it.
369
00:27:21,901 --> 00:27:25,489
Is it East Willard or
West Willard Boulevard?
370
00:27:25,513 --> 00:27:29,188
No, no, no, no, shh.
371
00:27:29,212 --> 00:27:31,843
You're not gonna crap
out on me too, are you?
372
00:27:31,867 --> 00:27:34,324
Gonna be stranded
in this flooded toilet.
373
00:27:34,348 --> 00:27:38,154
Don't do it. Do not do it.
374
00:27:38,178 --> 00:27:40,460
Shh, come on.
375
00:27:56,631 --> 00:27:59,218
Well, that's great.
376
00:27:59,242 --> 00:28:02,787
Don't bother to have any
numbers on the buildings.
377
00:28:02,811 --> 00:28:07,033
Y'ello? King Pest Control!
378
00:28:09,470 --> 00:28:12,342
The King has arrived!
379
00:28:16,129 --> 00:28:19,761
Yo?
380
00:28:19,785 --> 00:28:24,050
King Pest Control?
You cry, bugs die.
381
00:28:28,141 --> 00:28:29,988
You got about 30 seconds before
382
00:28:30,012 --> 00:28:33,209
- I get out of here.
- Mr. King?
383
00:28:33,233 --> 00:28:35,777
- Yeah, that'd be me.
- Thank you for coming.
384
00:28:35,801 --> 00:28:41,260
My name is Murdoch. You
may call me Mr. Murdoch.
385
00:28:41,284 --> 00:28:43,828
I appreciate your time.
I already know that
386
00:28:43,852 --> 00:28:46,309
your services are
in great demand.
387
00:28:46,333 --> 00:28:50,879
- Yeah, right, yeah.
- There's only one King.
388
00:28:50,903 --> 00:28:54,099
Of course.
389
00:28:54,123 --> 00:28:55,622
So what's the problem?
390
00:28:55,646 --> 00:28:58,060
Do I gotta guess? Look,
I can handle anything
391
00:28:58,084 --> 00:29:01,367
from fleas to
alligator infestations.
392
00:29:01,391 --> 00:29:02,717
I have no doubt whatsoever
393
00:29:02,741 --> 00:29:04,980
as to your efficacy, Mr. King.
394
00:29:05,004 --> 00:29:09,419
You come very
highly recommended.
395
00:29:09,443 --> 00:29:11,769
Really? A referral? Who?
396
00:29:11,793 --> 00:29:14,032
Well, I'm not at
liberty to reveal that,
397
00:29:14,056 --> 00:29:18,167
but I do know that you come
from decades of experience,
398
00:29:18,191 --> 00:29:20,517
a family trade, in fact,
399
00:29:20,541 --> 00:29:23,650
handed down from your
uncle, currently incarcerated?
400
00:29:23,674 --> 00:29:25,391
Hey, what's that
gotta do with anything?
401
00:29:25,415 --> 00:29:28,960
Apologies.
402
00:29:28,984 --> 00:29:30,570
It's immaterial.
403
00:29:30,594 --> 00:29:34,270
It has no bearing at
all on our business.
404
00:29:34,294 --> 00:29:36,141
Tell me, Mr. King,
405
00:29:36,165 --> 00:29:39,362
would you enjoy owning
a new service van?
406
00:29:39,386 --> 00:29:41,712
- What do you mean?
- The one I got's okay.
407
00:29:41,736 --> 00:29:44,236
Well, I could hear you
coming from half a mile away.
408
00:29:44,260 --> 00:29:46,673
Listen, don't be upset.
409
00:29:46,697 --> 00:29:50,939
I believe that I could
be the solution of
410
00:29:50,963 --> 00:29:53,463
many such problems of yours,
411
00:29:53,487 --> 00:29:58,555
provided you help me
with problems of mine.
412
00:29:58,579 --> 00:30:00,992
Special drugs for special
bugs, Mr. Murdoch.
413
00:30:01,016 --> 00:30:04,430
- I make vermin die squirmin'.
- Quite.
414
00:30:04,454 --> 00:30:10,306
Well, permit me to
apprise you of my problem.
415
00:30:10,330 --> 00:30:15,528
My vermin problem.
416
00:30:15,552 --> 00:30:17,487
See, I have
417
00:30:17,511 --> 00:30:19,663
I've owned this property
for quite some time.
418
00:30:19,687 --> 00:30:21,404
In fact, I have
several just like it,
419
00:30:21,428 --> 00:30:26,104
and I'm poised to have
them all razed and refurbished
420
00:30:26,128 --> 00:30:28,541
into condominium complexes.
421
00:30:28,565 --> 00:30:31,675
If I'm satisfied
with your results,
422
00:30:31,699 --> 00:30:33,024
there could be a
great deal more work
423
00:30:33,048 --> 00:30:35,548
just like this for
you, full-time work.
424
00:30:36,922 --> 00:30:39,422
Well, twist my
arm, lead me to it.
425
00:30:39,446 --> 00:30:42,207
My problem is I can't
begin the renovations
426
00:30:42,231 --> 00:30:46,670
until my infestation
issue has been dealt with.
427
00:30:49,456 --> 00:30:51,458
Come take a look.
428
00:31:05,602 --> 00:31:08,843
- Easy-peasy.
- No mystery there.
429
00:31:08,867 --> 00:31:10,453
Rats are attracted
to the food waste
430
00:31:10,477 --> 00:31:11,889
these vagrants
leave lying around,
431
00:31:11,913 --> 00:31:17,634
plus fetid garbage,
plus human waste.
432
00:31:17,658 --> 00:31:20,071
I got just the cocktail.
433
00:31:20,095 --> 00:31:22,552
Nitrobenzene plus
brotophyllocum.
434
00:31:22,576 --> 00:31:25,555
Vitamin K antagonist
anticoagulant.
435
00:31:25,579 --> 00:31:26,991
Kills rats dead.
436
00:31:27,015 --> 00:31:30,995
Hell, it'll kill
rabbits, possums.
437
00:31:31,019 --> 00:31:32,518
Just about anything.
438
00:31:33,979 --> 00:31:38,089
I didn't say anything
about rats, Mr. King.
439
00:31:38,113 --> 00:31:43,181
You did mention something
about human waste?
440
00:31:43,205 --> 00:31:46,208
Well, there you go.
441
00:31:51,257 --> 00:31:55,019
I've tried every conventional
method of removing them.
442
00:31:55,043 --> 00:31:57,848
The city officials
have been no help.
443
00:31:57,872 --> 00:32:00,807
The civil authorities claim
it's not their responsibility.
444
00:32:00,831 --> 00:32:04,376
I've had the police
remove them several times.
445
00:32:04,400 --> 00:32:06,185
I've run out of options.
446
00:32:08,317 --> 00:32:11,775
You want me to get
rid of these people?
447
00:32:11,799 --> 00:32:15,585
I want you to resolve
my vermin issue.
448
00:32:17,979 --> 00:32:21,263
Do you know what they
cook in those kettles?
449
00:32:21,287 --> 00:32:25,006
Animals! Stray dogs and cats.
450
00:32:25,030 --> 00:32:28,207
I shudder to think what
else they might be cooking.
451
00:32:30,557 --> 00:32:31,838
You know what,
452
00:32:31,862 --> 00:32:34,319
I don't do murder for
hire. I'm outta here.
453
00:32:34,343 --> 00:32:38,019
- That's all you do, Mr. King!
- Who do you think you're kidding?
454
00:32:38,043 --> 00:32:39,455
No, no, no, no!
455
00:32:39,479 --> 00:32:42,588
This is not the same
as anything that I do!
456
00:32:42,612 --> 00:32:46,877
Of course it is! Here.
457
00:32:49,271 --> 00:32:52,971
Look before you
leave, as they say.
458
00:32:57,976 --> 00:32:59,673
Now that is a lot of money.
459
00:33:03,155 --> 00:33:07,004
Surely one of your
special chemical cocktails
460
00:33:07,028 --> 00:33:10,965
will do the trick. Drugs
for bugs, as you say.
461
00:33:10,989 --> 00:33:16,037
After all, you are the King.
462
00:33:18,083 --> 00:33:21,410
Aren't you?
463
00:33:21,434 --> 00:33:23,610
All hail the King.
464
00:33:28,006 --> 00:33:31,507
Okay, okay, maybe just one.
465
00:33:31,531 --> 00:33:35,815
I-I-I could... I mean,
I could do one.
466
00:34:41,992 --> 00:34:43,709
It ain't worth it.
467
00:34:53,221 --> 00:34:54,720
Now wait a minute. Sir?
468
00:34:54,744 --> 00:34:56,461
Sir?
469
00:36:13,519 --> 00:36:14,757
Damn it.
470
00:36:14,781 --> 00:36:16,976
How dare you, you
frickin' little monster?
471
00:36:17,000 --> 00:36:22,678
In my house? My house?
472
00:36:22,702 --> 00:36:25,183
Gotta give you
credit for some balls.
473
00:36:57,606 --> 00:37:01,717
A for effort, Mr. King.
474
00:37:01,741 --> 00:37:04,285
Unfortunately, you lost
your nerve, didn't you?
475
00:37:04,309 --> 00:37:07,549
Is that Murdoch?
476
00:37:07,573 --> 00:37:10,378
That means you're
not the King, doesn't it?
477
00:37:10,402 --> 00:37:12,467
No, no, no, what are you doing?
478
00:37:12,491 --> 00:37:14,425
And one more thing.
479
00:37:20,847 --> 00:37:23,956
Now you really are King.
480
00:37:27,070 --> 00:37:29,135
The crap is it now?
481
00:38:40,535 --> 00:38:43,340
They must've ate it all.
482
00:38:43,364 --> 00:38:46,430
The soup, the poison,
every one of 'em.
483
00:38:53,505 --> 00:38:55,874
You've reached
Murdoch Ventures Limited.
484
00:38:55,898 --> 00:38:59,182
Please leave a succinct...
485
00:38:59,206 --> 00:39:00,401
The hell with you too,
486
00:39:00,425 --> 00:39:02,141
you one-percent shitbag.
487
00:39:32,500 --> 00:39:36,437
God. See, come on.
488
00:39:45,121 --> 00:39:46,577
God!
489
00:39:53,478 --> 00:39:56,021
Holy shit!
490
00:40:23,029 --> 00:40:26,487
Damn it, leave
me the hell alone!
491
00:40:50,448 --> 00:40:52,048
- We're sorry.
- The number you dialed...
492
00:40:53,059 --> 00:40:56,062
Shit! Shit!
493
00:41:13,558 --> 00:41:15,560
What the hell?
494
00:42:07,089 --> 00:42:08,700
Mr. King.
495
00:42:11,964 --> 00:42:14,116
Mr. King.
496
00:42:14,140 --> 00:42:16,074
Can you hear me?
497
00:42:16,098 --> 00:42:17,839
What are you doing here?
498
00:42:23,279 --> 00:42:26,520
I need your help. I
mean, I need to talk to you.
499
00:42:26,544 --> 00:42:27,999
You're hurt. I called
an ambulance.
500
00:42:28,023 --> 00:42:31,307
No! No ambulance, please.
501
00:42:31,331 --> 00:42:33,178
You said you listen to people
502
00:42:33,202 --> 00:42:34,789
and you help them
with their problems.
503
00:42:34,813 --> 00:42:36,878
Yes, but you obviously
need medical attention.
504
00:42:36,902 --> 00:42:38,314
I'm not equipped.
505
00:42:38,338 --> 00:42:43,493
No, no, no, no, no,
please, I've done something!
506
00:42:43,517 --> 00:42:46,104
I've done something
bad and I need your help!
507
00:42:46,128 --> 00:42:48,629
You have to help me!
508
00:42:48,653 --> 00:42:51,307
- Okay.
- Okay.
509
00:42:59,533 --> 00:43:02,425
What's going on.
510
00:43:02,449 --> 00:43:04,122
I don't know why I said yes.
511
00:43:04,146 --> 00:43:06,255
I was gonna say no,
but then I saw the guy
512
00:43:06,279 --> 00:43:08,300
with the briefcase
and I was like,
513
00:43:08,324 --> 00:43:09,824
and I thought all that dough
could solve all my problems
514
00:43:09,848 --> 00:43:11,521
- and...
- Mr. King,
515
00:43:11,545 --> 00:43:12,609
you need to slow down.
516
00:43:12,633 --> 00:43:14,263
Take a breath.
517
00:43:14,287 --> 00:43:17,440
Now tell me, what
did he want you to do?
518
00:43:17,464 --> 00:43:20,051
"Do what you do best."
That's what he said.
519
00:43:20,075 --> 00:43:21,487
"Now they're
practically dead already.
520
00:43:21,511 --> 00:43:24,142
They eat dogs and cats
and maybe even people."
521
00:43:24,166 --> 00:43:26,449
Who is it that said this to you?
522
00:43:34,873 --> 00:43:37,634
The devil.
523
00:43:37,658 --> 00:43:40,419
The man who showed
up in your bedroom
524
00:43:40,443 --> 00:43:43,422
in the middle of
the night in a dream
525
00:43:43,446 --> 00:43:46,556
and now cannot be
found, according to you.
526
00:43:46,580 --> 00:43:48,819
I dropped it into the soup,
the strongest cocktail I got.
527
00:43:48,843 --> 00:43:51,866
I spent years developing it.
528
00:43:51,890 --> 00:43:53,737
It's a joke. It's my joke.
529
00:43:53,761 --> 00:43:56,305
It's, um, kind of a...
what do you call it?
530
00:43:56,329 --> 00:43:57,872
A mixologist of the trade,
531
00:43:57,896 --> 00:43:59,743
the right drug
for the right bug?
532
00:43:59,767 --> 00:44:03,355
Nitrobenzene,
brotophyllocum, pyrethroids?
533
00:44:03,379 --> 00:44:05,575
They tried to ban it, but if
you know the ingredients,
534
00:44:05,599 --> 00:44:07,011
you can roll your own.
535
00:44:07,035 --> 00:44:08,709
That all sounds
wonderful, Mr. King.
536
00:44:08,733 --> 00:44:12,669
I'm sure you're very
good at what you do.
537
00:44:12,693 --> 00:44:14,105
I know what you're thinking.
538
00:44:14,129 --> 00:44:15,454
You're thinking
I've got some kind of
539
00:44:15,478 --> 00:44:17,674
overblown guilt complex!
540
00:44:17,698 --> 00:44:21,243
Well, I'm beginning to
think you need a cocktail too!
541
00:44:21,267 --> 00:44:23,462
Bottoms up, doc!
542
00:44:27,055 --> 00:44:31,079
Guilt can be a powerful drug,
543
00:44:31,103 --> 00:44:34,256
but so is sleep deprivation.
544
00:44:34,280 --> 00:44:38,129
You haven't had any sleep
in a long time, have you?
545
00:44:38,153 --> 00:44:40,218
No.
546
00:44:40,242 --> 00:44:42,481
How could I?
547
00:44:42,505 --> 00:44:44,440
They come even when I'm asleep.
548
00:44:44,464 --> 00:44:46,398
I see.
549
00:44:46,422 --> 00:44:51,752
I think you need to sit
back, close your eyes,
550
00:44:51,776 --> 00:44:55,581
and maybe take a nap.
551
00:44:55,605 --> 00:44:59,063
I can fetch you some
warm herbal tea,
552
00:44:59,087 --> 00:45:01,370
if you think
553
00:45:01,394 --> 00:45:05,156
that might help.
554
00:45:10,708 --> 00:45:13,817
I've got a roach problem now,
555
00:45:13,841 --> 00:45:16,801
and I think I know why.
556
00:45:57,450 --> 00:45:59,254
No.
557
00:45:59,278 --> 00:46:02,561
No, no, no!
558
00:46:02,585 --> 00:46:06,522
No, no.
559
00:46:06,546 --> 00:46:09,743
- Great.
- Hey, doctor?
560
00:46:09,767 --> 00:46:13,311
Doctor, help? Doctor,
help me, please!
561
00:46:13,335 --> 00:46:15,661
Please help me! Please,
it's me, Harlan King!
562
00:46:15,685 --> 00:46:17,576
You said you'd help!
563
00:46:17,600 --> 00:46:19,080
Damn roaches.
564
00:46:22,736 --> 00:46:25,628
Doc? Doctor? Doc?
565
00:46:25,652 --> 00:46:28,805
It's me, Harlan!
Is that the drug?
566
00:46:28,829 --> 00:46:30,633
What are you doing?
You said you'd help!
567
00:46:30,657 --> 00:46:32,678
No, no, doctor, please, it's me!
568
00:46:32,702 --> 00:46:35,638
It's me, please! Help me!
569
00:46:35,662 --> 00:46:39,555
Please, help me! What
are you doing, it's Harlan!
570
00:46:39,579 --> 00:46:42,036
Please, no, no, no, no, no!
571
00:46:42,060 --> 00:46:44,125
No, it's me! It's me!
572
00:46:44,149 --> 00:46:47,345
- Damn it.
- No, please! Please!
573
00:46:47,369 --> 00:46:50,087
No!
574
00:46:58,990 --> 00:47:01,882
Coming.
575
00:47:01,906 --> 00:47:06,190
Hello, doctor. Bug problem?
41488
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
