All language subtitles for Abbott.and.Costello.Meet.the.Mummy.1955.720p.BluRay.x264-x0r_track3_eng

MALE NARRATOR:
It has been said

that a man's best friend is
his mummy.

In Egypt today,
this theory is to be
in great dispute.

For two bold adventurers

are about to discover

another kind of mummy.

(SHRIEKING)

I'll have a waiter for you
in a minute, sir.

Hey, the meat's on fire.

How stupid can you get?

How stupid do you
want me to be?

There you are, sir.

The meat is
still on fire.

Dr. Zoomer, have you
any statement for the press?

You may say that
I have discovered
the mummy of Klaris,

Prince of Evil.

And that somewhere
in the sarcophagus is
a clue,

which will lead to
the discovery of the tomb
of Princess Ara.

I see.
That's very interesting.

Go quickly and tell Semu
that we have located Klaris

and will return him
to the tomb of his people.

And the Doctor?

He will not
escape punishment.

Well, as soon as I can find
two trustworthy men
to accompany my mummy,

I will ship it to the States.

Who is that?
Dr. Zoomer.

Where's Rontru?
In the other room.

Rontru.

Yes?

Dr. Zoomer found
the mummy of Klaris.

Then get it.

Have you no fear
of the curse of Klaris?

There is no curse
that a gun or a knife
can't cure.

Get Klaris away
from Dr. Zoomer.

It won't be easy.

You follow
the Doctor home.

If anything
should happen to him,

it will be blamed
on the curse of Klaris.

Past the pyramids,
near the ruins
of an old temple

is a large rock.

Search there and...

Now this is the place.

I overheard Dr. Zoomer say
he needed a couple of men

to accompany his mummy
back to the States.

Is she afraid
to travel by herself?

She? No, his mummy is a he.

What's wrong with that?

Some mummies are men,
some mummies are women.

It's a strange country.

What's strange about it, Lou?

Your mummy,
wasn't she a woman?

I never had a mummy.

What'd your father do?
Win you in a crap game?

I...

What's the matter?
I thought you were
gonna slap me.

I said stop that nonsense.

HETSUT:
Beloved Klaris,

you will soon be returned
to your people.

Now come on. We'll go in here
and try and get the job.

Let's get back
to the States.

Dr. Zoomer.

Must have went out to lunch.

No.

A man wouldn't go out
and leave his door open

with a valuable mummy
in the house.

Dr. Zoomer?

LOU:
Dr. Zoomer?

Dr. Zoomer!

Something funny about this.

We'd better look around.

I'll look in that room there.
You search this one.

Dr. Zoomer.

Dr. Zoomer?

Dr. Zoomer?

Mrs. Zoomer?
Is your husband here?

Mrs. Zoomer?

Mrs...

Lou, what's the matter?

In there.
Bandages with eyes.

The mummy of Klaris!

Nobody could have
a mummy like that.

That mummy is 4,000 years old.
She looks it.

Come on. We've got to
take a picture of that.

Come on, follow me.

Well, where is it?

It was here.

What do you mean,
"It was here"?

It was here.
Mummies can't walk.

It must be around here
someplace.

The sacred medallion is
missing.

I'll search
the infidel doctor.

You must hurry.

Klaris has been too long
without sustenance.

If Klaris is gone,
somebody moved him.

It wasn't me.

Then it's either Dr. Zoomer,
or there's somebody
in this house

who don't belong here.

And I know who it is.
Who?

Me.
Now wait a minute.

Take this camera.
You go and hide

and take a picture of anybody
that comes in this room.

And if there's anything fishy
going on around here,
we'll have the proof.

I gotta take a picture
of you.

Stay right there.

Now, would you mind
smiling, please?

Attaboy. Now,
will you lean back?

That coat's in your way.

Hey. Hey, I found
a dead body.

Maybe it's the Doctor.

BUD:
Where is it?

First the mummy disappears.
Now a body disappears.

The heat must be
getting the best of you, boy.

Go in the bathroom
and soak your head.

What's the matter?
The body is in here.

What body?

The body that was
supposed to be in there,
is in here.

Show me.

Behind the door.

Come on. I'm getting
sick and tired of this.

Why don't you do
as I tell you? Go and hide!

Hide. Hide. Yeah.

Hide? Yeah.

Hide.

Abbott, I got him!

Hey, Abbott! I got him.
It's me.

I am sorry.

You're no good
to me at all.

Now go wait for me
in the office.

Get out of here.
Get in the office.

(MUMBLING)

Get in the office!

(SIGHS)

DR. ZOOMER'S VOICE ON TAPE:
Dear friend, I suppose
you are surprised

to hear the sound of my voice.

You can say that again,
brother. I thought
you were dead.

I have much to tell you.

Okay, I'll sit down.
Shall I call Abbott?

This is for your ears alone.

I won't call him.

Yesterday, I found Klaris.

Me, too.

Today, I think
I have the secret
of the Princess Ara.

I am giving
the secret to you

in case something
happens to me.

I won't tell anybody.

Everyone who has searched
for Klaris has died.

Oh.

Now that I have found him,

I fear the curse of Klaris.

Is that why you hid
in the closet
and the bathroom?

Past the pyramids,
near the ruins
of an old temple

is a large rock.
Search there

and...
And...

Abby!

What happened?

Dr. Zoomer. He was
talking to me,
and then he went...

He's right over here.
Where is he?

DR. ZOOMER ON TAPE:
Dear friend, I suppose
you are surprised

to hear the sound of my voice.

I told you before
I was surprised, Doc.

Now come on.
Get up off the floor
and quit scaring me.

He'll never scare
anyone again.

He's been murdered.

Is this the man
you saw in the closet?
Yeah.

Only thing is,
he had some clothes on.

We better call the police.

But in case
the body disappears,

you better take
a couple of pictures.

I'll get him up.

There you are.
Go ahead, Lou.

I searched
the Doctor's clothes.

The sacred medallion was
not there.

The wrath of Semu
will be upon us,

but we must face him.

Wait a minute. Make a note
on the back of
one of the pictures,

so the cops will know
who it is.

This is Dr. Zoomer.
Signed, a friend.

Perfect.

Attaboy.
All right, now.
Go with me now.

Now give that to me.

Come on,
let's get out of here.

How many times did you
shoot Dr. Zoomer?

I shot the body three times
and the head twice.

Good. Come on,
let's get out of here
before anybody sees us.

You know, instead of
calling the cops,

we'll send them
these pictures.

There's no need of us
getting involved
in this affair.

BOY:
Paper!
Hey, boy.

Take this down to the police,
and here's a tip for you.

Give him a tip.

Thanks.
Hustle along.

Well, come on.

You have done well.

Let us celebrate
the return of Klaris
to his people.

The sacred medallion,
the secret of Princess Ara,
where is it?

The Doctor must have taken it.
I searched but I failed.

May the curse of Klaris
be upon the one
who has the medallion.

Hetsut, Iben,
return to that house
and search again.

If you do not find it,
you must die.

I've got to figure this out.

Buddy, my boy,
if you find the fellow
who killed Dr. Zoomer,

you've got the murderer.

Hey, you've got
something there...

What makes you so dumb?

I'll prove it
with the lady. Lady!

How dare you try to
make a date with me?

I work in the cafe.

I do my act. Nobody makes
a date with me.

I finish my act.

So you think you're going to
make a date with me?

You think I'll tell you
I live at

42-42-54 Ruelle Padle,
Apartment 2B?

You think I'm going to
tell you I am not married,
I live by myself

and that my phone number
is 23-41-648?

Oh. Just because I work
in the cafe, I do my act...

And if you dare
to follow me home,

here's my card.

Hey, wait a minute.
What is this all about?

No, lady.
I don't think I can.

No, lady, I can't.

No, lady,
I don't think I can.

Hey, Abbott,
what's she saying?
Maybe I can.

(SHUSHING)
Oh.

Lou, I'm surprised at you.

Accepting a card
from a perfect stranger,
a lady

with her address
and her telephone number
on it.

Give me that card.
I'll get rid of it.

Extra! Read all about it!

Dr. Zoomer found murdered!
BUD:
Here you are, boy.

I'll take one of those.
There you are.

You!

What's the matter with him?
He must have saw something.

"The noted archeologist
Dr. Gustav Zoomer was
found murdered in his home

"and the famous mummy
Klaris stolen.

"The police expect to
take the murderer
into custody any minute,

"thanks to some pictures sent
by an anonymous friend.

"For balance of story
and photo, see Page 3."

Hey, you know, those pictures
that you took may solve
this murder.

I...

Hey, look at these pictures
you took.

You took me
with Dr. Zoomer.

What have you got to say?

Believe me, he looks better
than you do.
Why, you...

Uh-oh.

The kid is
tipping off the cops.

Let's see if there's
a back way out of here.

The newsboy said
this gentleman was here.

Which gentleman?
The one that's alive.

Which one is alive?

The big one.
Have you seen him?

This has been a busy day.
Perhaps. Perhaps not.

Sit down
and play your flute.

BUD: Alms.

Alms.

Alms.

Alms.

Keep playing!

Alms.

Hey, you sit over here.

Alms.

Alms.

Blow that thing.
They're watching us.

(PLAYING)

Stop blowing.

What happened?

You got me in enough trouble.
Lay down.

Do you think
this is safe?

We have no choice.

If they didn't bring
Klaris out, then he must
still be in there,

and so is
the sacred medallion.

We've got to get it
before they come back.

If they do come back,
watch out for
the baby-faced guy.

He's a killer.

He's probably the leader.
We'll take no chances
with him.

Now they say that a murderer
always returns to the scene
of his crime.

Now we're going inside.
Turn on the recorder,

and when the murderer
hears Dr. Zoomer's voice,

naturally, he's going to
investigate.

Then what do we do?
Run.

No! We grab him. Come on.

Come on.

Press the recorder
for a playback.
I'll look around.

Should anyone come in,
call me.

Yeah. I'll tell you
what I'll do.

Hey, Bud, if anybody comes in,
I'm gonna call you fast,
because...

He's here.
Who?

Behind me.

That's your reflection!

Look, why don't you
be a man?

Be brave!
Be tough like me.

Be tough like you?
Be tough like me!

Nothing scares me.

Nothing scares me!

Nothing scares me!

Be brave. Be tough.

Nothing scares me.

(SOBBING)

I can't be tough.

I would if I could.

I'm gonna find out.

(CLICKING)

This is a gun!

And I'm gonna use it.

Put your hands up
or I'll fill you full of lead!

Back up!

Back up!

Back up!

I'm gonna see
if I'm really tough now.

This is a gun!

And I'm gonna use it.

Put your hands up
or I'll fill you full of lead!

Back up!

Back up!

Back up!

Don't shoot.

Please don't shoot.

Hey, Buddy, it's me.

Why, you...

Now stop
playing around.

I've gotta clear myself
of this murder rap.

We'll search
the trophy room.

Hide.

A lot of these old houses
had secret doors and passages.

When you knocked
on anything,

you never knew
what would happen, or what
you were going to find.

Come in.

Who are you talking to?

Somebody knocking at the door.
It's me knocking.

Did you push me?
Certainly not.

You're imagining things again.

What have you got there?

It's a piggy bank.

Piggy bank?
Yep.

Hey.

What's that?

Finders keepers.

Charlie, Josef,
get the medallion!

Hey, there's no latch
on the door. Come on,
move this over.

BUD:
Keep pushing.

Attaboy.
Yes, sir.

Help!

Come on.
Let's get out of here.

BUD:
Hold it!

What are we gonna do now?
Go over to that door.

As soon as I
give you the signal,
open it up.

Grab him. He's the murderer!

Are you sure this is
the murderer? We've been
looking for a tall guy.

That's his partner.
This is the one
who pulled the trigger.

We heard him say
he shot the body three times
and the head twice.

Phone for the patrol.

This is a gun!

And I'm gonna use it.

Put your hands up
or I'll fill you full of lead!

Back up!

Back up!

Back up!

Back up!

He tricked us.

At least I know
where to look
for the medallion.

We'll search
till we find him.
Remember, he's dangerous.

So am I.

We have located the medallion.

It is in the possession
of a short, fat foreigner.

Take it away
from him.

So you do not fail,
I will go with you.

(PEOPLE CHATTERING)

You know, if all those people
are after this gadget,

there must be
some connection between this
and Dr. Zoomer's murder.

Right?
Right.

Right. Now, there's only
one way to find out
if it's valuable.

That's to try
and hock it, right?

Right.
Come on.

Here, it's too big.

Come on, get in.

Yes, gentlemen?
What can I do for you?

How much can we get on this?

No! No! It is evil!

It's a curse! Take it away!

Protect me!

Protect me
from the curse of Klaris!

It means death!

Take it away!

There's something wrong
with him.

Let's find another place.

Are you two gentlemen
the proprietors?
No, we're customers.

The proprietor
left in a hurry.

All we did was
show him this...

Take it away!
Don't show it to me, please!

Protect me! Protect me!
Take it away!
Don't let me look!

Don't let me look!
Protect me from the curse
of Klaris, please!

Ain't you scared?

Well, of course not.
It's only a valueless piece
of costume jewelry.

But, of course,
if you need money...
How much?

Would $100 help you?

You mean $100 for this?

Well, no, it's
not worth that,

but it would always
remind me of you.

Well, let's make
the price $5,000,
so you don't forget me.

Even if I was
willing to pay $5,000,

it's too large an amount
to carry around with me.

Where do you want to
make the payoff?

Suppose we talk it over
at the Cafe Bagdad at 6:00.

The name is Madame Rontru.

I'll be there.
Good.

BUD:
I'll be there, too.

I can hardly wait.

$5,000.

Oh, boy!

I'll have to figure
this thing out.

$5,000 will take us
to the States.

Now I gotta figure out
the fare.

Let's see,
a first-class ticket for me,

third-class ticket for you.

A new suit of clothes
for me.

Of course you'll have to
have your shoes shined.

I'll have to buy
some expensive gifts
to take home to the folks.

You can send home
a couple of postcards.

Excuse me, I owe you
a thousand apologies
for my unwarranted behavior.

I will buy the medallion.

I'm sorry,
we have another buyer.

LOU:
And she's
prettier than you are.

And tonight I'm gonna
meet her at the Cafe Bagdad.

(GASPS)

SEMU:
Hetsut. Iben.

We'll wait for darkness.

You came a long way
from St. Louis

You climbed the ladder
of success

I've seen the town
and country cars that were
parked out in front

Of your fancy address

You came a long way
from St. Louis

You broke
a lot of hearts between

I've met a gang
of gloomy gals who were

Doing all right
till you came on the scene

You blew in
from the middle west
and certainly impressed

The population hereabouts

But, honey,
I've got news for you
I'm from Missouri, too

So naturally,
I've got my doubts

You've got them
dropping by the wayside

A feeling
I ain't gonna know

You came a long way
from St. Louis

But, baby, you still got
a long way to go

You blew in
from the middle west

And certainly impressed
the population hereabouts

But, honey,
I've got news for you

I'm from Missouri, too,
and naturally,
I've got my doubts

You've got them dropping
by the wayside

A feeling
I ain't gonna know

You came a long way
from St. Louis

But, baby you still got
a long way to go

You've got
a long way to go

You got a long way to go

No, you don't.

Well, I don't see her.

Maybe we're too early.

Well, I've got enough money
for hamburgers and coffee.

And after we
sell the medallion,

we'll have
steaks and potatoes.

Come on, let's sit down.

Waiter.

Two hamburgers
and two coffees, please.

Yes, sir. Very well, sir.

Hey, this is a good time
to get the lowdown
on that fake jewelry,

before we make a deal
with that dame.

Waiter.

Does this mean
anything to you?

It means death.

Death to whoever holds it.

Hey.

You better get rid
of that medallion. You heard
what the waiter said,

"It's death to
whoever holds it."

Mmm-hmm.

You know, Lou,

I think it was the medallion
that caused those characters
to throw the knives at us.

You're so right.

Boy, am I glad
I feel good.

Flowers?
Flowers.

How much are those flowers?
$1.

How much are these?
$1.

I ain't got no money.
No money?

Uh-uh.

They're a little wilted,
you can have them
for nothing.

(SIGHS)

Sorry, sir.
When you put the flower
on my tray,

you accidentally
put this jewelry on it.

Oh, no.

I will bring the coffee later.
Okay.

Lou.

Isn't that
a beautiful girl over there?

Abbott, I believe this girl
over here is much prettier.

Wait a minute.
How can you compare
this girl

with that gorgeous creature
over there?

Why, it's ridiculous.

Just a minute.

I still believe that
that girl over there is
much prettier.

I still say that girl
over there

is the prettiest girl
in the place.

Would you mind
if I try yours?

Sorry to have
kept you waiting.

I have a private dining room
just for us.

Well, that's mighty nice
of you.
Not you.

I prefer to deal direct.

Come, little man.

You brought the medallion?

May I see it?

I see you want
your money first.

It's warm in here.
Let me have your coat.

I'll put some soft music on.

What's the matter?
Termites.

You're seeing things.

Come over here. Sit down.
Make yourself comfortable.

There, and I'll fix us
some refreshments.

Isn't that head
a scary thing?

You know, they say
that animal devoured a man
just before they shot it.

And when they stuffed him,
they forgot to
pull the guy out.

No, you don't.
I'll take care of this.

I'll hang it up myself,
that way I'll know
everything is...

Give me this thing.

Why are you leaving?

Pickpockets.
You must be mistaken.

There's no one here but us.
Yeah?

What about this guy over here?

You see,
it's only a statue.

Apparently,
you don't trust me.

So here's your money.

Thank you.

Light?
Yes.

See how honest I am?
Get out of here.

I've had enough
of this nonsense. Charlie!

Josef!

I want that medallion.

Can't give it to you.
Why not?

I ate it.
ALL:
You ate it?

With ketchup.

The police have arrested
Hetsut for the murder
of Dr. Zoomer.

SEMU:
Then they no longer blame
the tall foreigner?

Not after the autopsy.

It showed the infidel doctor
died from a poisoned dart
imbedded in his ear.

So Hetsut put the noose
around his own neck.

Let him hang.

What about the two
that have the medallion?

They were taken to the house
of Dr. Azzui.

In that case,
I shall visit the Doctor.

You may as well
put away the gun.
I will not help you.

My dear Doctor,
I spent many months
as a nurse.

I'm fully capable of handling
either an X-ray
or a fluoroscope.

Take care of him, Charlie.

Take off your coat
and unbutton your shirt.

Yes, ma'am.
Please don't cut me up.

Don't get excited.
I just want to look at you

through the fluoroscope
to see if you're
telling the truth.

Get behind there. No!

Turn out the lights, Charlie.

A marble,
a couple of buttons,
a safety pin...

I lost a tie clasp
two years ago.
See if it's in there.

Shut up.

What are those letters
of the alphabet?

They're from the necklace
Dr. Zoomer used
to hold the medallion.

Those letters
don't prove he ate
the medallion.

The only way
to find out is
to cut him open.

No. Maybe if you stand me
on my head,
it might fall out.

That's an idea,
but I've got a better one.

Turn on the lights.

Now what?

Shake him up a bit.

That's enough.

Get behind there.

Turn off the lights.

Lights.

Little man, if you've
lied to me about that
medallion, you'll regret it.

Let's stop fooling
and cut him open.

No, don't. Shake me up
once more. I know it's there.

All right. Just once more,
but that's final.

You, help shake him up.

If you think I'm gonna help
shake up my pal,

you're right.

Grab his feet.

Pick him up.

LOU:
Abbott!

Don't let him get away.

Grab the table.

All right, get him down.

What good is the X-ray?
We can't read hieroglyphics.

We'll get someone
to translate them.

(DOORBELL RINGS)
I'll answer it.

You stay here
and watch them.

I told you to watch those
two men. What are you
doing here?

I came to warn you
that someone else is
after the medallion.

Go in there with Charlie.

I'm looking
for two gentlemen.

A pawnbroker friend
of mine told me

they had a rare medallion
to dispose of.

If you'll tell me why you're
interested in the medallion,

I'll tell you whether or not
they're here.

As a student of archaeology,
I am interested
in any object

which deals
with ancient history.

Could you read
hieroglyphics, Mister...

Professor Semu.

As I told you,
I'm a student.

I shall be happy to lend my
humble assistance, Madame...

Rontru.

Wait here a minute,
please.

He says he can read
the hieroglyphics.
We've got to take a chance.

I wouldn't trust him.
Suppose he reads the secret
and then disappears.

That's exactly what
I'm planning on.

Here's an X-ray.

The sacred medallion of Ara.

What an extraordinary place
to keep it.

But a safe place.
It would be difficult
to steal it.

Quite.

However, the X-ray
of the hieroglyphics
reveals the way

to the untold wealth
of Ara.

"Past the pyramid,

"near the ruins
of an old temple,
is a large rock."

With my knowledge
of the desert, I could prove
a valuable guide.

For how much?

I will leave that up to you.
I'm sure you will be generous.

When would you like to
start our expedition?

Before dawn.

Meet me at the Cafe Bagdad.

I will take two men
to help us.

Take the one
who has the medallion.

And if anything should happen
to the X-ray, you can still
get the medallion.

Professor, you're a man
after my own heart.

How true.

Good night, Madame.

Josef.

He will lead us
to the treasure.

You and Charlie follow,
but keep out of sight.

How much of a cut
does he get?

He's leaving that
to my generosity.

If he is a professor,
he has a lot to learn.

Semu approaches.
Warn our people.

We shall make camp here.

This is the first step.
Do you wish to continue?

The reward is great enough
for me to take the gamble.

However, if you are afraid
of the curse of Klaris,

you can go back to town.
If I were afraid,
I would not be here.

But a legend that has lasted
over 4,000 years
must have some truth.

My dear Professor, some
of the men I have met have
acted like mummies,

and others have certainly
acted like they were
4,000 years old.

But I have never met one
I was afraid of.

So why should I fear Klaris?

It is said that Klaris
never died.

That he still lives
and breathes.

Kept alive over the centuries
by his followers,

so that he may guard the tomb
of Princess Ara
and her treasure.

Surely, you're not trying
to frighten me.
I am only warning you.

Now I must see if this place
is as deserted as it appears.

After you've finished
unloading, pitch the tent
over there.

What's the matter with you?
She's pretty.

Who?
That horse. That's a pretty
white horse.

Unload the stuff.

Followers of Klaris,

my search has ended.

I have brought back
the one who has
the sacred medallion.

And when we find the treasure,
we'll melt down the gold
and recut the jewels.

And that mummy of Klaris,
it might be worth something

if we could smuggle it
out of the country.

CHARLIE:
Whatever we find, we take.

The only thing
we'll leave behind
will be the Professor.

What about those two idiots?
They, too, are expendable.

Two more infidels
have arrived.

So, two more mice
come to nibble
at the golden cheese.

When will they die?
After the feast of Klaris.

Prepare for the celebration.

All right. Pitch the tent.

All right, Lou, here.
Put your stakes here. Lou!

Lou!

Abbott, is that you?

I will lead the infidels
to the worship room.

When the celebration
of Klaris is ended,
their lives will end with it.

And so will the threat
to the treasure
of Princess Ara.

You're always...

Hey, Bud, hey, Bud,
it's in there. I saw it.
The mummy.

We better tell Miss Rontru
and the Professor.

Wait a minute.
Why tell them?

If we find the mummy,
we'll make a fortune.
Where is it?

It's in there.
Where will we find the mummy?

Don't worry, the mummy
will find you.
Where is it?

Inside, in the hole
in the rock.
Where's the hole in the rock?

Over here.
Where?

There was a hole in
the rock a minute ago.
There's no hole in the rock!

Hey, there was!
Now this is no time to laugh.

This is serious.
Where's the hole in the rock?

Here, give me a boot.

I'll be, hey!

Look! Come on, follow me.

I have to get back
before the Professor
suspects something.

Was it wise to leave him
out of your sight?

Well, what did you
expect me to do?
Bring him here?

This wouldn't be a bad place
to get rid of him.

I'll make the decisions.
You just make sure
you keep out of sight.

And then he came out of here,
and then he tried to choke me.

You mean,
the mummy is alive?
Yeah.

Well, a live mummy is worth
more to us than a dead mummy.

I'll tell you what you do.
You sit here,
I'll sit over there,

and when the mummy comes out,
and goes to choke you,

I'll whistle like this.

Then you grab him.
How are you gonna whistle?

I'll whistle like this.
(BLOWING)

Never mind. Just a minute.
I'll tell you what you do.

I'll sit over there,
you sit over here.

When the mummy comes out
to grab you, I'll...

Like this, and you grab him.

Mummy, you can come out now.

What are you whistling for?
I'm the one that's
supposed to whistle.

Hey, Abbott,
where are you going?

Have you seen the Professor?
The Professor is
not a professor.

He's right in there
with the whole gang.

And he's gonna kill us,
right after
the celebration of Klaris.

No wonder he had no trouble
finding this place.

Charlie! Josef!

Where did they come from?

We've been double-crossed.
Semu is the leader
of the followers of Klaris.

He brought me here
to kill me.

So we kill him,
before he kills you.

Then we steal Klaris
and get the treasure.

Take these tools.
Go behind those rocks
and dig a hole.

Somebody's gonna
get buried.

You fellows stand
on either side
of that opening.

The Professor has
a surprise coming.

Lou, this looks like
a soft spot to dig.

Here, I'll help you.
Give me one of those
implements.

Here, take your pick.
There.

Wait. Hold it,
that's a shovel. Here's
the pick over here.

Well, I picked the shovel.
The shovel is my pick.

No, this is a pick.
This is a shovel.

That is what I picked,
is the shovel.

How can the shovel
be the pick?

Look, if I had wanted a pick,
I would've picked the pick.

But instead, I picked
the shovel, because the shovel
is my pick.

In other words, you don't want
to pick the pick,
because the pick is a pick

and a shovel isn't the pick.
If you pick
the pick to pick,

the shovel
isn't the pick.

Now you've got it.
Now I got it.
I don't even know

what I'm talking about.

You still don't understand,
do you?
No.

Here, look.
Now you take your pick.

There you are.
Now the pick is your pick!

Let's try it again now.
Now, come on,
you take your pick.

You took the shovel!
Here's the pick, over here!

All right, please.
Come on, dig a hole here.

We're in enough trouble
as it is, Lou.

Now dig your hole there.

You know, if we try to escape,
we'll get lost on this desert.

And if we stay here,
we'll possibly wind up
in that hole, instead of Semu.

I don't know what to do.
Something's got to be done.

You can...
Hey, a midget mummy!

Go away!

So, Lou. After all,
there's an old saying,

If you can't beat them,
join them.

That's what we'll do.
We'll strike a bargain
with Semu.

After all, you've got
the medallion. You got
nothing to worry...

Oh, sure.

Leaves me here
to do all the work.

You don't care who does it
or how it's done.

What have you found out,
Professor?
Follow me and I will show you.

So you know who I am.

Killing me will be
of no avail. You cannot
escape my followers.

You're right.
So we'll hold you
as the hostage.

Then we'll have something
to bargain with.

Hey, let's get out of here.
Yeah.

(GASPS)

Will you stop playing around?
If we get caught in here,
we'll be killed.

Can't make that.
There must be another exit.

What's that?

Either Semu has changed plans,
or something has happened.

We must search
until we find him.

It stopped.

I wonder where it came from?

Here's an exit.
Come on, Lou.

Abbott!

Charlie, you look like
the real thing.

Josef, go get Klaris.
We'll dump him in here while
Charlie takes his place.

And you, Professor,
are my hole card

in case some of your followers
get in the game.

Let's find Semu and see
if he'll exchange our lives
for the medallion.

No, it's too late.
Why?

When I saw the mummy, I got
scared so I coughed it up.
He's got it.

Oh, no! What are we gonna do?
How are we gonna
get out of this?

Ask Klaris.
He got us into this.
And he's gonna get us out.

I know how to get in good
with Semu.

JOSEF:
I'll bury him in.
You take his place.

It's moving.

It isn't now.
Come on, let's get him.

We'll take Klaris out
and bury him, so those crooks
can't steal him.

Then I'll come back
and take his place.

Have you decided
to disclose the secret
of Ara's treasure?

Whether you talk or not,
you're still our passport
back to Cairo.

I'll take the detector.
You bring the explosives.

There. Throw him in there,
and cover him up
so he can't be seen.

Hey, boy!

Are we in luck!
There's enough bandages here
to make me look like Klaris.

Get a load of this.

Let's get out of here.

I don't think I hit him
hard enough.

It's the Professor!
Help me lift him up.

Set him down.

What do I do now?
Untie him!

As soon as we have a chance
to get in good with him,
you spoil it.

Take my hand, and we'll
still try to save
the treasure.

Come on, Charlie.
We've located it.

He's not here.
What do you suppose
happened to him?

I don't know,
but we're not waiting.

Look, we've better find
a place to hide. Come on.

Hey, Abbott,
what are you...

Come on, Costello.
The coast is clear. Hurry up!

BUD:
No, don't try to
scare me, Lou.

Maybe there is something
to this curse of Klaris.

Charlie disappears and...
You've stalled long enough.

Either light the fuse,
or I will.

Have you got a match?
Get that torch.

Costello!

Costello!

Charlie!

Stand where you are!
Three of them.

Which one of you is Charlie?
Step forward, raise your hand.

We must hurry. Even now
we may be too late
to save the treasure of Ara.

Klaris! You will destroy us
and the temple.

LOU:
Back up!

(ALL EXCLAIMING)

Hey, where have you been?
Hey!

I was thinking about leaving.
Get rid of it!

Here you are.
No! No!

What is it?
Dynamite.

Dynamite!

The secret of Princess Ara
has been revealed

and Klaris is destroyed.

All that remains now
for my people is the legend.

Why not let the whole world
know of the legend?

I have a way of keeping
the memory of Klaris
alive forever.

How can you do that?

Wait a minute.
This is the opening night
of the Kafe Klaris.

And everybody's dressed
but you.
I'll be dressed in a minute.

Wise guy, eh?

(GRUNTS)

Do you know how to play
one of these?
Why, certainly.

Show me.