Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:01,551 --> 00:00:03,621
♪ This is the life
2
00:00:03,620 --> 00:00:05,280
♪ You've got the life
3
00:00:05,275 --> 00:00:07,275
♪ This is the city where
4
00:00:07,275 --> 00:00:08,235
♪ We party every night
5
00:00:08,241 --> 00:00:09,291
♪ Every night
6
00:00:09,293 --> 00:00:10,793
♪ Doing deeds
7
00:00:10,793 --> 00:00:11,433
♪ Diamonds and gold
8
00:00:11,431 --> 00:00:19,841
♪ Welcome to Hollywood ♪
9
00:00:19,844 --> 00:00:21,314
Today, Tisha and I are
10
00:00:21,310 --> 00:00:22,620
having our first table read
11
00:00:22,620 --> 00:00:23,830
for our brand-new sitcom,
12
00:00:23,827 --> 00:00:27,337
"Tisha and Duane."
13
00:00:27,344 --> 00:00:28,074
Hey, how you doing, man,
14
00:00:28,068 --> 00:00:28,528
I'm Duane--
15
00:00:28,534 --> 00:00:30,524
I know who you are,
16
00:00:30,517 --> 00:00:31,337
Mr. Martin.
17
00:00:31,344 --> 00:00:32,764
Hey, listen, welcome
18
00:00:32,758 --> 00:00:33,548
to Paramount. Ms. Martin.
19
00:00:33,551 --> 00:00:34,281
Hi, honey.
20
00:00:34,275 --> 00:00:34,995
I'm a big fan of yours--
21
00:00:35,000 --> 00:00:35,470
Thank you.
22
00:00:35,465 --> 00:00:37,475
Well, we never actually
23
00:00:37,482 --> 00:00:38,932
co-starred together.
24
00:00:38,931 --> 00:00:39,931
I mean, even at home, she's
25
00:00:39,931 --> 00:00:41,101
treated like the star,
26
00:00:41,103 --> 00:00:41,883
and I'm treated like an extra.
27
00:00:41,879 --> 00:00:44,759
But that's over now.
28
00:00:44,758 --> 00:00:46,998
I'ma be on top, baby!
29
00:00:47,000 --> 00:00:48,090
I'm such a big fan of yours.
30
00:00:48,086 --> 00:00:49,376
Thank you, I appreciate it.
31
00:00:49,379 --> 00:00:50,099
I've seen everything, like,
32
00:00:50,103 --> 00:00:51,833
"Down Periscope," "Ride or Die."
33
00:00:51,827 --> 00:00:52,717
"Seat Filler."
34
00:00:52,724 --> 00:00:53,454
Oh, he saw that?
35
00:00:53,448 --> 00:00:54,208
Unbelievable.
36
00:00:54,206 --> 00:00:55,546
Hey, listen, we're gonna be
37
00:00:55,551 --> 00:00:56,901
doing a lot of years here,
38
00:00:56,896 --> 00:00:58,376
right, so, when I come,
39
00:00:58,379 --> 00:00:59,169
when you see my car, can you
40
00:00:59,172 --> 00:01:00,002
just lift the gate up?
41
00:01:00,000 --> 00:01:00,900
Oh, for sure, anything
42
00:01:00,896 --> 00:01:01,616
you need, you got it.
43
00:01:01,620 --> 00:01:02,280
You got it.
44
00:01:02,275 --> 00:01:03,165
All right.
45
00:01:03,172 --> 00:01:06,312
I loved you in "Juice!"
46
00:01:06,310 --> 00:01:09,020
[Tisha laughing]
47
00:01:09,017 --> 00:01:10,827
Okay, so you wanna run lines
48
00:01:10,827 --> 00:01:12,167
before we go onto the stage
49
00:01:12,172 --> 00:01:13,002
or something?
50
00:01:13,000 --> 00:01:13,760
Hey, look, babe, why don't
51
00:01:13,758 --> 00:01:14,638
you just chill, all right?
52
00:01:14,637 --> 00:01:15,477
It's a table read.
53
00:01:15,482 --> 00:01:16,522
We already got the job.
54
00:01:16,517 --> 00:01:17,617
Yeah, I'd like to keep the
55
00:01:17,620 --> 00:01:19,500
job, thank you very much, Duane.
56
00:01:19,499 --> 00:01:20,019
Don't be a jerk.
57
00:01:20,017 --> 00:01:23,547
Just run the first scene with me
58
00:01:23,551 --> 00:01:24,281
or something.
59
00:01:24,275 --> 00:01:25,405
Hey, look, Tisha,
60
00:01:25,413 --> 00:01:26,143
check this out.
61
00:01:26,137 --> 00:01:26,927
I need you to calm down,
62
00:01:26,931 --> 00:01:27,661
all right, look.
63
00:01:27,655 --> 00:01:28,965
I know you like to have
64
00:01:28,965 --> 00:01:29,685
everything worked out in your
65
00:01:29,689 --> 00:01:30,309
head before you get to--
66
00:01:30,310 --> 00:01:31,070
Most people do, Duane.
67
00:01:31,068 --> 00:01:31,858
But look, I don't
68
00:01:31,862 --> 00:01:32,552
work like that.
69
00:01:32,551 --> 00:01:33,241
That's cause you process
70
00:01:33,241 --> 00:01:33,931
things slowly.
71
00:01:33,931 --> 00:01:34,931
No-no-no-no-no, I like to fly
72
00:01:34,931 --> 00:01:36,621
in the part in the moment.
73
00:01:36,620 --> 00:01:37,410
This is what I do, okay?
74
00:01:37,413 --> 00:01:38,933
Mmm... what you do?
75
00:01:38,931 --> 00:01:39,791
You mean, what you did,
76
00:01:39,793 --> 00:01:41,313
like, six years ago?
77
00:01:41,310 --> 00:01:42,310
Yeah, that was funny.
78
00:01:42,310 --> 00:01:43,100
Did you see that?
79
00:01:43,103 --> 00:01:43,863
[laughing]
80
00:01:43,862 --> 00:01:44,722
That bounced right up off me.
81
00:01:44,724 --> 00:01:45,414
Did it, really?
82
00:01:45,413 --> 00:01:46,073
This is what I need you
83
00:01:46,068 --> 00:01:47,278
to do, I need you to give me
84
00:01:47,275 --> 00:01:48,855
the ball and clear out the way,
85
00:01:48,862 --> 00:01:49,692
all right?
86
00:01:49,689 --> 00:01:50,479
Oh, you want me to clear out
87
00:01:50,482 --> 00:01:51,142
your way?
88
00:01:51,137 --> 00:01:51,827
Yes.
89
00:01:51,827 --> 00:01:52,717
You're always second fiddle.
90
00:01:52,724 --> 00:01:53,524
You're second fiddle on
91
00:01:53,517 --> 00:01:54,237
"Martin," you're second fiddle
92
00:01:54,241 --> 00:01:55,211
on "My Wife and Kids."
93
00:01:55,206 --> 00:01:56,856
So you're used to it.
94
00:01:56,862 --> 00:01:57,552
Ain't nobody got time
95
00:01:57,551 --> 00:01:58,241
for that.
96
00:01:58,241 --> 00:01:59,001
Uh-huh.
97
00:01:59,000 --> 00:02:01,860
Ain't nobody got time
98
00:02:01,862 --> 00:02:04,122
for that.
99
00:02:04,120 --> 00:02:05,340
Ay, yo, Eric is right about
100
00:02:05,344 --> 00:02:06,174
one thing.
101
00:02:06,172 --> 00:02:07,622
I'm all about that money.
102
00:02:07,620 --> 00:02:08,760
I mean, I don't need it,
103
00:02:08,758 --> 00:02:10,478
but I always like getting more
104
00:02:10,482 --> 00:02:11,522
so I can continue not to need
105
00:02:11,517 --> 00:02:14,997
it, know what I'm saying?
106
00:02:15,000 --> 00:02:20,780
♪
107
00:02:20,775 --> 00:02:24,655
What's up?
108
00:02:24,655 --> 00:02:27,335
Yo, that track is hot.
109
00:02:27,344 --> 00:02:28,284
You produced that?
110
00:02:28,275 --> 00:02:29,895
Nah, man, this ain't me.
111
00:02:29,896 --> 00:02:33,856
Well, who did the track?
112
00:02:33,862 --> 00:02:34,932
Take a guess.
113
00:02:34,931 --> 00:02:36,141
Yo, come on, E, man.
114
00:02:36,137 --> 00:02:36,927
You said there was some money to
115
00:02:36,931 --> 00:02:38,451
be made, now who did the track?
116
00:02:38,448 --> 00:02:41,548
All right, listen, go back.
117
00:02:41,551 --> 00:02:42,761
Who did you smash
118
00:02:42,758 --> 00:02:44,168
your first girl to?
119
00:02:44,172 --> 00:02:45,592
Me? Willie Nelson,
120
00:02:45,586 --> 00:02:46,476
"On The Road Again."
121
00:02:46,482 --> 00:02:47,762
Man, come on, bro.
122
00:02:47,758 --> 00:02:48,428
I swear for everything.
123
00:02:48,431 --> 00:02:50,101
If you was really smashing,
124
00:02:50,103 --> 00:02:53,283
then you was smashing to the
125
00:02:53,275 --> 00:02:56,825
king, baby.
126
00:02:56,827 --> 00:02:57,287
What up, baby?
127
00:02:57,293 --> 00:03:00,833
Yo, E, what's going on, man?
128
00:03:00,827 --> 00:03:01,617
[laughing]
129
00:03:01,620 --> 00:03:02,970
I just told you what's going
130
00:03:02,965 --> 00:03:04,405
on, baby.
131
00:03:04,413 --> 00:03:06,173
♪
132
00:03:06,172 --> 00:03:08,972
The king is back!
133
00:03:08,965 --> 00:03:10,685
Bobby B.!
134
00:03:10,689 --> 00:03:11,019
♪
135
00:03:11,017 --> 00:03:15,207
Tisha carrying a long,
136
00:03:15,206 --> 00:03:16,826
soiled wig crosses to the
137
00:03:16,827 --> 00:03:17,897
kitchen where she finds
138
00:03:17,896 --> 00:03:18,566
Duane reading a magazine.
139
00:03:18,568 --> 00:03:21,238
Duane, why did you throw my
140
00:03:21,241 --> 00:03:22,411
Beyonce wig in the trash?
141
00:03:22,413 --> 00:03:23,283
You know tomorrow night
142
00:03:23,275 --> 00:03:26,615
is Sasha Fierce night.
143
00:03:26,620 --> 00:03:29,210
[laughing]
144
00:03:29,206 --> 00:03:31,206
Wig? I thought it was
145
00:03:31,206 --> 00:03:33,066
a dead squirrel.
146
00:03:33,068 --> 00:03:36,518
[awkward chuckling]
147
00:03:36,517 --> 00:03:37,047
[clearing throat]
148
00:03:37,051 --> 00:03:39,621
Uh, Tisha looks at Duane
149
00:03:39,620 --> 00:03:41,000
angrily as Carl enters
150
00:03:41,000 --> 00:03:42,860
through the back door.
151
00:03:42,862 --> 00:03:43,552
What a minute, what is he
152
00:03:43,551 --> 00:03:45,001
still doing here?
153
00:03:45,000 --> 00:03:46,410
Aren't you supposed to be out
154
00:03:46,413 --> 00:03:48,383
finding you a new job?
155
00:03:48,379 --> 00:03:48,779
J-Zero?
156
00:03:48,775 --> 00:03:50,995
[laughing]
157
00:03:51,000 --> 00:03:54,170
Kanye Less!
158
00:03:54,172 --> 00:03:56,312
2 Stainz!
159
00:03:56,310 --> 00:03:57,520
[pounding on table]
160
00:03:57,517 --> 00:03:59,067
Yeah, but I do have a job.
161
00:03:59,068 --> 00:04:00,448
That's keeping your daughter's
162
00:04:00,448 --> 00:04:01,998
happy spot happy.
163
00:04:02,000 --> 00:04:05,520
Ha-ha!
164
00:04:05,517 --> 00:04:06,997
Uh, Duane, let's--
165
00:04:07,000 --> 00:04:08,240
let's try that again.
166
00:04:08,241 --> 00:04:09,831
Okay, um...
167
00:04:09,827 --> 00:04:16,897
And-- just be yourself.
168
00:04:16,896 --> 00:04:17,496
Energy, just do you.
169
00:04:17,499 --> 00:04:20,139
How in the hell can this fool
170
00:04:20,137 --> 00:04:22,167
suck at playing Duane Martin?
171
00:04:22,172 --> 00:04:22,782
He is Duane Martin.
172
00:04:22,775 --> 00:04:27,445
♪
173
00:04:27,448 --> 00:04:29,828
Yo, why is Bobby here, man?
174
00:04:29,827 --> 00:04:30,547
Yeah, I thought
175
00:04:30,551 --> 00:04:31,451
he was in jail.
176
00:04:31,448 --> 00:04:32,168
I thought he was in rehab.
177
00:04:32,172 --> 00:04:33,102
I thought Bobby was dead.
178
00:04:33,103 --> 00:04:34,213
Man, come on, y'all, Bobby's
179
00:04:34,206 --> 00:04:35,206
on house arrest.
180
00:04:35,206 --> 00:04:36,786
[bleep]-damn, bracelet.
181
00:04:36,793 --> 00:04:38,243
Yo, why is Bobby really here?
182
00:04:38,241 --> 00:04:39,551
It's my ball.
183
00:04:39,551 --> 00:04:40,791
A'ight, listen.
184
00:04:40,793 --> 00:04:41,863
He wants to buy back in
185
00:04:41,862 --> 00:04:43,102
the game, all right?
186
00:04:43,103 --> 00:04:44,623
And I know a dude like you would
187
00:04:44,620 --> 00:04:46,280
do anything for money,
188
00:04:46,275 --> 00:04:47,855
so he gave me this to give you.
189
00:04:47,862 --> 00:04:49,592
50 Gs to start
190
00:04:49,586 --> 00:04:50,376
making the record,
191
00:04:50,379 --> 00:04:51,759
and another 150
192
00:04:51,758 --> 00:04:52,898
once you finish the record.
193
00:04:52,896 --> 00:04:53,546
Damn.
194
00:04:53,551 --> 00:04:54,211
For real?
195
00:04:54,206 --> 00:04:54,896
No lie.
196
00:04:54,896 --> 00:04:55,656
So what about the rest of the
197
00:04:55,655 --> 00:04:56,235
problem?
198
00:04:56,241 --> 00:04:57,141
Oh, no, he's good, man.
199
00:04:57,137 --> 00:04:57,827
Bobby's cool,
200
00:04:57,827 --> 00:04:58,517
he's clean, trust me.
201
00:04:58,517 --> 00:04:59,897
Bobby!
202
00:04:59,896 --> 00:05:01,306
Bobby, where you going?
203
00:05:01,310 --> 00:05:02,660
I'm going to get my ball.
204
00:05:02,655 --> 00:05:03,515
What are you talking-- Bobby,
205
00:05:03,517 --> 00:05:04,447
the ball comes back.
206
00:05:04,448 --> 00:05:05,098
What you mean,
207
00:05:05,103 --> 00:05:05,933
the ball comes back?
208
00:05:05,931 --> 00:05:07,241
The ball goes down there,
209
00:05:07,241 --> 00:05:08,691
through a machine and comes
210
00:05:08,689 --> 00:05:13,029
back, man.
211
00:05:13,034 --> 00:05:15,034
Ha, Kev,
212
00:05:15,034 --> 00:05:16,314
you trippin' me out, man.
213
00:05:16,310 --> 00:05:17,480
You would take us to a fly-ass
214
00:05:17,482 --> 00:05:18,902
bowling alley, look at you.
215
00:05:18,896 --> 00:05:20,446
All right, 50 Gs is 50 Gs,
216
00:05:20,448 --> 00:05:21,098
you know what I'm saying?
217
00:05:21,103 --> 00:05:22,173
Did you see that? What up--
218
00:05:22,172 --> 00:05:22,972
Did you see that there?
219
00:05:22,965 --> 00:05:23,785
You see that?
220
00:05:23,793 --> 00:05:25,213
I'm good, I'm good, baby.
221
00:05:25,206 --> 00:05:25,996
Did you see Bobby just try to
222
00:05:26,000 --> 00:05:26,620
walk down the lane
223
00:05:26,620 --> 00:05:27,830
to get his ball out?
224
00:05:27,827 --> 00:05:28,897
Even though the balls came back.
225
00:05:28,896 --> 00:05:29,996
He's crazy.
226
00:05:30,000 --> 00:05:31,100
How your table read go, man?
227
00:05:31,103 --> 00:05:31,933
He was trying to go get
228
00:05:31,931 --> 00:05:32,591
his ball.
229
00:05:32,586 --> 00:05:33,276
C'mon, man, we killed it.
230
00:05:33,275 --> 00:05:33,965
Are you serious?
231
00:05:33,965 --> 00:05:34,895
I bowled a perfect strike.
232
00:05:34,896 --> 00:05:36,206
That's huge, Shake.
233
00:05:36,206 --> 00:05:37,026
I propose a toast.
234
00:05:37,034 --> 00:05:37,864
I like that.
235
00:05:37,862 --> 00:05:39,312
To my man, Shake's new show.
236
00:05:39,310 --> 00:05:40,310
Yes, sir.
237
00:05:40,310 --> 00:05:41,100
That's right, baby.
238
00:05:41,103 --> 00:05:42,173
And to me producing
239
00:05:42,172 --> 00:05:42,902
Bobby's album.
240
00:05:42,896 --> 00:05:43,616
Ahh!
241
00:05:43,620 --> 00:05:44,340
150 Gs!
242
00:05:44,344 --> 00:05:46,764
You got the check.
243
00:05:46,758 --> 00:05:47,968
Nick, you just in time, we
244
00:05:47,965 --> 00:05:48,995
were just toasting the new show.
245
00:05:49,000 --> 00:05:49,760
I told 'em how
246
00:05:49,758 --> 00:05:51,968
we killed it today.
247
00:05:51,965 --> 00:05:53,305
Yeah, about the show, man,
248
00:05:53,310 --> 00:05:54,170
can I talk to you in private?
249
00:05:54,172 --> 00:05:55,172
Fun police.
250
00:05:55,172 --> 00:05:56,002
[mimicking siren]
251
00:05:56,000 --> 00:05:56,970
What's this private stuff,
252
00:05:56,965 --> 00:05:58,545
Nick? We all family right here.
253
00:05:58,551 --> 00:05:59,831
Whatever you got to say, you can
254
00:05:59,827 --> 00:06:01,237
say it in front of anybody, man.
255
00:06:01,241 --> 00:06:02,001
I don't really think that's
256
00:06:02,000 --> 00:06:02,790
a good idea.
257
00:06:02,793 --> 00:06:04,143
Oh, I get it.
258
00:06:04,137 --> 00:06:05,337
You wanna pick the show up for
259
00:06:05,344 --> 00:06:07,004
another 72 episodes?
260
00:06:07,000 --> 00:06:08,280
Ha!
261
00:06:08,275 --> 00:06:09,855
I told you, we killed it.
262
00:06:09,862 --> 00:06:11,902
Actually, yeah, and, um,
263
00:06:11,896 --> 00:06:12,786
you can watch it from
264
00:06:12,793 --> 00:06:14,413
the comfort of your own home.
265
00:06:14,413 --> 00:06:15,383
You're fired.
266
00:06:15,379 --> 00:06:18,409
[all] Damn!
267
00:06:18,413 --> 00:06:18,783
Oh.
268
00:06:18,775 --> 00:06:20,965
You know what, Nick?
269
00:06:20,965 --> 00:06:22,305
You can't do the "Tisha and
270
00:06:22,310 --> 00:06:23,170
Duane" show
271
00:06:23,172 --> 00:06:25,722
without Tisha and Duane.
272
00:06:25,724 --> 00:06:27,454
We're a package deal, baby.
273
00:06:27,448 --> 00:06:28,928
Oh, no we're not.
274
00:06:28,931 --> 00:06:30,001
You said throw you the ball
275
00:06:30,000 --> 00:06:31,210
and stay out of the way.
276
00:06:31,206 --> 00:06:32,406
Well, I guess now,
277
00:06:32,413 --> 00:06:34,073
you're out of the way.
278
00:06:34,068 --> 00:06:36,758
Still want the ball?
279
00:06:36,758 --> 00:06:37,778
♪
280
00:06:37,775 --> 00:06:38,995
Damn, Nick, come on, man,
281
00:06:39,000 --> 00:06:39,970
that's cold as hell.
282
00:06:39,965 --> 00:06:40,685
He got fired from playing
283
00:06:40,689 --> 00:06:41,339
his-self?
284
00:06:41,344 --> 00:06:42,104
You dirty, Nick!
285
00:06:42,103 --> 00:06:42,833
No.
286
00:06:42,827 --> 00:06:44,477
Somebody call Tisha!
287
00:06:44,482 --> 00:06:45,792
I knew you broke up Kenan and
288
00:06:45,793 --> 00:06:46,973
Kel! I know you did it.
289
00:06:46,965 --> 00:06:48,275
Stop it, let me talk to him.
290
00:06:48,275 --> 00:06:49,825
Sit down.
291
00:06:49,827 --> 00:06:50,517
You talk to him.
292
00:06:50,517 --> 00:06:52,927
Sit down.
293
00:06:52,931 --> 00:06:53,661
Can I talk to you
294
00:06:53,655 --> 00:06:54,405
in private as well?
295
00:06:54,413 --> 00:06:55,283
Ain't going nowhere in
296
00:06:55,275 --> 00:06:56,065
private with you, you little
297
00:06:56,068 --> 00:06:58,068
sneaky covert bastard.
298
00:06:58,068 --> 00:06:58,898
Whatever you wanna say to me,
299
00:06:58,896 --> 00:06:59,686
you can say in front of my
300
00:06:59,689 --> 00:07:00,519
friends, Nick.
301
00:07:00,517 --> 00:07:01,237
That's right, that's right.
302
00:07:01,241 --> 00:07:03,031
Please talk.
303
00:07:03,034 --> 00:07:04,454
We wanna offer you the role.
304
00:07:04,448 --> 00:07:05,788
That's it, that's it!
305
00:07:05,793 --> 00:07:06,453
Whoa!
306
00:07:06,448 --> 00:07:08,068
I can't wait. I can't wait!
307
00:07:08,068 --> 00:07:09,408
That's me! No!
308
00:07:09,413 --> 00:07:10,933
Shake, Shake, listen,
309
00:07:10,931 --> 00:07:11,831
stop, sit down.
310
00:07:11,827 --> 00:07:13,097
I got him, I got him, Bobby,
311
00:07:13,103 --> 00:07:13,973
I got him.
312
00:07:13,965 --> 00:07:15,515
Let me handle this.
313
00:07:15,517 --> 00:07:16,307
That's low, Nick.
314
00:07:16,310 --> 00:07:18,860
Okay?
315
00:07:18,862 --> 00:07:20,342
You wanna offer me the role,
316
00:07:20,344 --> 00:07:21,104
Nick?
317
00:07:21,103 --> 00:07:22,623
As if me and you are on a offer-
318
00:07:22,620 --> 00:07:24,970
me-a-role type basis, huh?
319
00:07:24,965 --> 00:07:26,445
Trust me, if Bushwick Bill
320
00:07:26,448 --> 00:07:27,308
had a SAG card,
321
00:07:27,310 --> 00:07:28,170
I wouldn't even be here
322
00:07:28,172 --> 00:07:29,032
right now.
323
00:07:29,034 --> 00:07:30,414
That's a real good one.
324
00:07:30,413 --> 00:07:31,723
Here's the thing, Nick.
325
00:07:31,724 --> 00:07:32,624
Unlike you, I'm not
326
00:07:32,620 --> 00:07:33,620
a back-stabber.
327
00:07:33,620 --> 00:07:35,140
I value my relationship
328
00:07:35,137 --> 00:07:35,857
with my friends.
329
00:07:35,862 --> 00:07:36,522
That's right.
330
00:07:36,517 --> 00:07:37,277
You understand that?
331
00:07:37,275 --> 00:07:38,685
So if you think that I'm gonna
332
00:07:38,689 --> 00:07:39,689
sit up here and take that little
333
00:07:39,689 --> 00:07:41,279
deal that you just offered me?
334
00:07:41,275 --> 00:07:43,515
Oh, man, homey.
335
00:07:43,517 --> 00:07:44,517
Your mind's playing
336
00:07:44,517 --> 00:07:46,517
tricks on you.
337
00:07:46,517 --> 00:07:48,097
It's 150,000.
338
00:07:48,103 --> 00:07:50,623
[all] Damn!
339
00:07:50,620 --> 00:07:51,450
For the season?
340
00:07:51,448 --> 00:07:52,898
An episode.
341
00:07:52,896 --> 00:07:53,856
[all] Damn!
342
00:07:53,862 --> 00:07:54,592
Oh!
343
00:07:54,586 --> 00:07:55,996
You know, guys like you
344
00:07:56,000 --> 00:07:58,520
give Hollywood a bad name.
345
00:07:58,517 --> 00:07:59,967
You all right, Shake?
346
00:07:59,965 --> 00:08:01,445
They make me sick!
347
00:08:01,448 --> 00:08:02,308
You're a good friend, Kev.
348
00:08:02,310 --> 00:08:03,000
You damn right
349
00:08:03,000 --> 00:08:03,690
I'm a good friend.
350
00:08:03,689 --> 00:08:04,309
That's right.
351
00:08:04,310 --> 00:08:05,100
I'm one of the best there is.
352
00:08:05,103 --> 00:08:06,003
Now that's friendship--
353
00:08:06,000 --> 00:08:06,790
I can't believe
354
00:08:06,793 --> 00:08:07,623
you would come here,
355
00:08:07,620 --> 00:08:08,590
in front of my friend!
356
00:08:08,586 --> 00:08:09,476
That's his boy.
357
00:08:09,482 --> 00:08:10,312
I'll tell you something,
358
00:08:10,310 --> 00:08:11,170
Nick.
359
00:08:11,172 --> 00:08:11,602
Kev...
360
00:08:11,603 --> 00:08:12,053
[whispering]
361
00:08:12,051 --> 00:08:14,721
Okay.
362
00:08:14,724 --> 00:08:16,664
You shut your mouth, shut up!
363
00:08:16,655 --> 00:08:17,655
'Cause what you got to say don't
364
00:08:17,655 --> 00:08:19,205
mean nothing to me right now.
365
00:08:19,206 --> 00:08:20,066
I don't even want you
366
00:08:20,068 --> 00:08:21,068
lookin' at Duane.
367
00:08:21,068 --> 00:08:22,028
'Cause I got one more thing
368
00:08:22,034 --> 00:08:22,904
to say to you.
369
00:08:22,896 --> 00:08:23,616
Shake, can you see him?
370
00:08:23,620 --> 00:08:24,340
Uh-uh.
371
00:08:24,344 --> 00:08:25,034
Yeah, you--
372
00:08:25,034 --> 00:08:25,644
And I ain't Kel!
373
00:08:25,637 --> 00:08:27,067
That's right, my last comment
374
00:08:27,068 --> 00:08:28,208
to you is to...
375
00:08:28,206 --> 00:08:30,306
[whispering]
376
00:08:30,310 --> 00:08:31,480
Okay...
377
00:08:31,482 --> 00:08:31,952
Shut up!
378
00:08:31,948 --> 00:08:33,758
'Cause you're making me mad,
379
00:08:33,758 --> 00:08:34,518
Nick.
380
00:08:34,517 --> 00:08:37,237
You don't wanna make me mad.
381
00:08:37,241 --> 00:08:38,721
Leave...
382
00:08:38,724 --> 00:08:39,594
leave!
383
00:08:39,586 --> 00:08:40,236
That's right.
384
00:08:40,241 --> 00:08:41,341
Walk.
385
00:08:41,344 --> 00:08:42,124
Go ahead.
386
00:08:42,120 --> 00:08:42,670
[whispering]
387
00:08:42,672 --> 00:08:46,172
Walk!
388
00:08:46,172 --> 00:08:47,052
That's your boy, right there.
389
00:08:47,051 --> 00:08:48,661
[whispering]
390
00:08:48,655 --> 00:08:51,565
♪
391
00:08:51,568 --> 00:08:52,758
He will be here.
392
00:08:52,758 --> 00:08:53,858
You know, this is totally
393
00:08:53,862 --> 00:08:54,592
unprofessional.
394
00:08:54,586 --> 00:08:55,276
Thank you.
395
00:08:55,275 --> 00:08:56,405
Open it up.
396
00:08:56,413 --> 00:08:58,453
He's here.
397
00:08:58,448 --> 00:09:00,168
They knew I was coming.
398
00:09:00,172 --> 00:09:01,072
And make a mental note
399
00:09:01,068 --> 00:09:01,998
of this, guys.
400
00:09:02,000 --> 00:09:03,170
Whoever operates this door
401
00:09:03,172 --> 00:09:03,902
is fired.
402
00:09:03,896 --> 00:09:05,686
Yes, at least he's here.
403
00:09:05,689 --> 00:09:06,999
I'm just gonna go.
404
00:09:07,000 --> 00:09:07,970
You think somebody
405
00:09:07,965 --> 00:09:08,715
playing with you.
406
00:09:08,724 --> 00:09:09,414
Stupid door.
407
00:09:09,413 --> 00:09:10,243
Move!
408
00:09:10,241 --> 00:09:12,381
[horn honking]
409
00:09:12,379 --> 00:09:13,999
And...
410
00:09:14,000 --> 00:09:15,720
Thank you.
411
00:09:15,724 --> 00:09:16,764
Why he got his Steve Harvey
412
00:09:16,758 --> 00:09:17,858
entourage with him?
413
00:09:17,862 --> 00:09:18,622
[clearing throat]
414
00:09:18,620 --> 00:09:19,310
Thank you, sir.
415
00:09:19,310 --> 00:09:20,000
Ladies and gentlemen,
416
00:09:20,000 --> 00:09:21,930
our new Duane, Mr. Kevin Hart.
417
00:09:21,931 --> 00:09:24,411
Give it up.
418
00:09:24,413 --> 00:09:25,863
Everybody welcome, Kevin.
419
00:09:25,862 --> 00:09:26,592
Pleasure to work with you.
420
00:09:26,586 --> 00:09:27,336
Stop, stop, I don't need
421
00:09:27,344 --> 00:09:31,034
nobody kissing my ass.
422
00:09:31,034 --> 00:09:31,974
What do you want me to do with
423
00:09:31,965 --> 00:09:32,825
that?
424
00:09:32,827 --> 00:09:33,827
I got coffee and cereal, Nick,
425
00:09:33,827 --> 00:09:35,997
what do you want me to do?
426
00:09:36,000 --> 00:09:37,380
Kevin, what are you wearing?
427
00:09:37,379 --> 00:09:38,759
Uh, I'm wearing what stars
428
00:09:38,758 --> 00:09:39,788
who don't have to wake up until
429
00:09:39,793 --> 00:09:42,033
noon wear, thank you.
430
00:09:42,034 --> 00:09:43,104
Uh, I just wanna
431
00:09:43,103 --> 00:09:44,243
reintroduce myself.
432
00:09:44,241 --> 00:09:46,001
I go by "The" Kevin Hart.
433
00:09:46,000 --> 00:09:48,210
Um... couple changes.
434
00:09:48,206 --> 00:09:49,066
Right now, acting as an
435
00:09:49,068 --> 00:09:50,168
executive producer on the show,
436
00:09:50,172 --> 00:09:51,342
I decided to make some executive
437
00:09:51,344 --> 00:09:52,384
decisions.
438
00:09:52,379 --> 00:09:54,999
Um, Chris, Ralph, dude,
439
00:09:55,000 --> 00:09:56,520
y'all are fired.
440
00:09:56,517 --> 00:09:57,477
So you need to get your ass up
441
00:09:57,482 --> 00:09:58,482
and out.
442
00:09:58,482 --> 00:10:00,002
Not feeling your vibe.
443
00:10:00,000 --> 00:10:01,000
Are you drunk?
444
00:10:01,000 --> 00:10:02,830
No, I'm saying you're fired.
445
00:10:02,827 --> 00:10:04,897
What-- what Donald Trump do?
446
00:10:04,896 --> 00:10:06,996
You're fired.
447
00:10:07,000 --> 00:10:07,830
Come on, man, get up.
448
00:10:07,827 --> 00:10:09,237
You got Pee-wee Herman
449
00:10:09,241 --> 00:10:10,551
and Jimmy Jam replacing me?
450
00:10:10,551 --> 00:10:11,761
[laughing]
451
00:10:11,758 --> 00:10:12,688
--should've wrote that joke.
452
00:10:12,689 --> 00:10:13,899
I was gonna say, if that was
453
00:10:13,896 --> 00:10:14,716
in the script, you wouldn't
454
00:10:14,724 --> 00:10:15,974
be fired.
455
00:10:15,965 --> 00:10:17,405
Get your old asses up, man.
456
00:10:17,413 --> 00:10:18,833
I'm the same age as him.
457
00:10:18,827 --> 00:10:19,547
Somebody get Old-Head
458
00:10:19,551 --> 00:10:20,241
some Bengay.
459
00:10:20,241 --> 00:10:21,001
Hey, man, would you hurry?
460
00:10:21,000 --> 00:10:22,280
[bleep] you, man.
461
00:10:22,275 --> 00:10:23,335
Hey, man, man,
462
00:10:23,344 --> 00:10:24,074
you better not...
463
00:10:24,068 --> 00:10:25,278
Hey, don't even do it.
464
00:10:25,275 --> 00:10:26,025
Dealing with anger,
465
00:10:26,034 --> 00:10:26,794
that's all that is.
466
00:10:26,793 --> 00:10:28,003
Moving on, Keenen,
467
00:10:28,000 --> 00:10:29,030
I didn't wanna make any changes
468
00:10:29,034 --> 00:10:30,214
with you because if I did,
469
00:10:30,206 --> 00:10:31,236
that would be a low-down,
470
00:10:31,241 --> 00:10:32,001
dirty shame.
471
00:10:32,000 --> 00:10:34,590
[laughing]
472
00:10:34,586 --> 00:10:35,686
That's one of my favorite movies
473
00:10:35,689 --> 00:10:37,379
right there.
474
00:10:37,379 --> 00:10:39,479
Ah, Reggie, dude, um...
475
00:10:39,482 --> 00:10:40,412
I'm just eyein' this, so I'm
476
00:10:40,413 --> 00:10:42,143
gonna get this out the way.
477
00:10:42,137 --> 00:10:45,337
I wanted to get Uncle Phil.
478
00:10:45,344 --> 00:10:46,144
I wanted to, I think he's a
479
00:10:46,137 --> 00:10:47,137
better actor than you.
480
00:10:47,137 --> 00:10:48,657
But I was like, if I fire you,
481
00:10:48,655 --> 00:10:49,335
then I'm gonna wake up like,
482
00:10:49,344 --> 00:10:50,314
"Did I do that?"
483
00:10:50,310 --> 00:10:51,590
Why even say that?
484
00:10:51,586 --> 00:10:52,236
That's stupid as hell.
485
00:10:52,241 --> 00:10:53,381
I don't wanna make you insecure.
486
00:10:53,379 --> 00:10:54,379
Want some Honey Nut Cheerios?
487
00:10:54,379 --> 00:10:55,209
I don't want no damn
488
00:10:55,206 --> 00:10:56,826
Cheerios.
489
00:10:56,827 --> 00:10:59,207
Just say "no." That's about--
490
00:10:59,206 --> 00:11:00,516
Somebody's on their cycle.
491
00:11:00,517 --> 00:11:02,137
Cycle Sundays!
492
00:11:02,137 --> 00:11:03,097
Also want to introduce you to
493
00:11:03,103 --> 00:11:04,313
your new head writers.
494
00:11:04,310 --> 00:11:06,140
Harry and Joey,
495
00:11:06,137 --> 00:11:07,407
two talented men who rewrote
496
00:11:07,413 --> 00:11:08,143
the script.
497
00:11:08,137 --> 00:11:09,237
Made it much better.
498
00:11:09,241 --> 00:11:11,071
Take one, pass it down, please.
499
00:11:11,068 --> 00:11:12,718
What is this bull[bleep]
500
00:11:12,724 --> 00:11:13,384
here, Nick?
501
00:11:13,379 --> 00:11:14,789
All right, as the owner
502
00:11:14,793 --> 00:11:16,313
of this network...
503
00:11:16,310 --> 00:11:19,790
tell her, Keenen.
504
00:11:19,793 --> 00:11:21,003
In order to get him to do
505
00:11:21,000 --> 00:11:21,860
the show, we had to give him
506
00:11:21,862 --> 00:11:22,762
creative control.
507
00:11:22,758 --> 00:11:23,478
You what, you what,
508
00:11:23,482 --> 00:11:24,832
you what?
509
00:11:24,827 --> 00:11:25,657
And your dressing room.
510
00:11:25,655 --> 00:11:26,855
My dressing room-- you let
511
00:11:26,862 --> 00:11:27,972
him do this, Nick?!
512
00:11:27,965 --> 00:11:29,965
Tell her, Keenen.
513
00:11:29,965 --> 00:11:31,335
Look, he wanted Gabrielle
514
00:11:31,344 --> 00:11:32,864
Union, we had to fight for you.
515
00:11:32,862 --> 00:11:34,622
You can't-- well, she--
516
00:11:34,620 --> 00:11:35,450
I was fightin'--
517
00:11:35,448 --> 00:11:37,408
He said-- oh, hell, no.
518
00:11:37,413 --> 00:11:38,143
What's the problem?
519
00:11:38,137 --> 00:11:38,927
Let me tell you what the
520
00:11:38,931 --> 00:11:40,931
problem is, the problem is you!
521
00:11:40,931 --> 00:11:42,481
Listen, Keenen, give me
522
00:11:42,482 --> 00:11:43,382
Damon's number. I wanna know
523
00:11:43,379 --> 00:11:44,209
how he dealt with this [bleep],
524
00:11:44,206 --> 00:11:44,926
'cause I'm not gonna do it.
525
00:11:44,931 --> 00:11:45,621
Oh, hell no.
526
00:11:45,620 --> 00:11:46,340
She's gonna be a headache,
527
00:11:46,344 --> 00:11:47,004
and I'm not gonna do it.
528
00:11:47,000 --> 00:11:48,520
Oh, hell, no, no!
529
00:11:48,517 --> 00:11:49,167
Uh-uh.
530
00:11:49,172 --> 00:11:50,282
No, let me go.
531
00:11:50,275 --> 00:11:51,025
Uh-uh, I'm not gonna
532
00:11:51,034 --> 00:11:51,764
get in the middle of this.
533
00:11:51,758 --> 00:11:52,998
[bleep] Let me get him.
534
00:11:53,000 --> 00:11:54,280
Let me get him, please, please.
535
00:11:54,275 --> 00:11:59,165
♪ Plenty of bottles are
536
00:11:59,172 --> 00:12:01,212
♪ Going down
537
00:12:01,206 --> 00:12:03,926
♪ Plenty of models all around
538
00:12:03,931 --> 00:12:05,521
♪ I just came here to spend
539
00:12:05,517 --> 00:12:07,477
♪ Some money y'all
540
00:12:07,482 --> 00:12:08,552
♪ I only got one night in town
541
00:12:08,551 --> 00:12:09,551
All right, yo, hold up.
542
00:12:09,551 --> 00:12:11,791
Yo, cut, please.
543
00:12:11,793 --> 00:12:13,283
Yo, this [bleep] is tough.
544
00:12:13,275 --> 00:12:14,205
Yeah, I know, dude.
545
00:12:14,206 --> 00:12:15,236
No, B. Like [bleep].
546
00:12:15,241 --> 00:12:16,001
It's depressing.
547
00:12:16,000 --> 00:12:16,690
How the [bleep] I let you
548
00:12:16,689 --> 00:12:17,519
talk me into this?
549
00:12:17,517 --> 00:12:19,137
Hey, y'all know
550
00:12:19,137 --> 00:12:22,067
I can hear you, right?
551
00:12:22,068 --> 00:12:23,238
I...
552
00:12:23,241 --> 00:12:25,831
Well, look, check, uh...
553
00:12:25,827 --> 00:12:27,787
100, Bobby, you--
554
00:12:27,793 --> 00:12:28,553
You don't sound like
555
00:12:28,551 --> 00:12:29,931
the old Bobby.
556
00:12:29,931 --> 00:12:31,971
Yeah, yeah, B, you just kinda
557
00:12:31,965 --> 00:12:34,095
sound like old Bobby.
558
00:12:34,103 --> 00:12:34,903
All right,
559
00:12:34,896 --> 00:12:35,966
first and foremost,
560
00:12:35,965 --> 00:12:36,995
let me just let y'all know
561
00:12:37,000 --> 00:12:38,590
something, brother to brother.
562
00:12:38,586 --> 00:12:40,336
This is my first time really
563
00:12:40,344 --> 00:12:42,624
recording sober.
564
00:12:42,620 --> 00:12:43,860
[both] Ohh...
565
00:12:43,862 --> 00:12:45,342
Why didn't you say so?
566
00:12:45,344 --> 00:12:46,314
We get it, yeah.
567
00:12:46,310 --> 00:12:47,030
Half of me feels
568
00:12:47,034 --> 00:12:48,144
sorry for the brother.
569
00:12:48,137 --> 00:12:48,997
♪ Plenty of bottles are
570
00:12:49,000 --> 00:12:50,720
♪ Going down
571
00:12:50,724 --> 00:12:53,724
Other half wanted to give him
572
00:12:53,724 --> 00:12:54,904
a double shot of scotch.
573
00:12:54,896 --> 00:12:55,896
♪
574
00:12:55,896 --> 00:12:56,716
Help us help you, Bobby.
575
00:12:56,724 --> 00:12:57,384
Right.
576
00:12:57,379 --> 00:12:58,309
Whatever it take to make you
577
00:12:58,310 --> 00:13:00,000
more comfortable, we with it.
578
00:13:00,000 --> 00:13:00,760
There it is.
579
00:13:00,758 --> 00:13:01,408
I'm with it, baby,
580
00:13:01,413 --> 00:13:02,103
tell me what to do.
581
00:13:02,103 --> 00:13:03,003
I thought you would never
582
00:13:03,000 --> 00:13:05,410
ask-- roll the tape back.
583
00:13:05,413 --> 00:13:06,833
Turn off all the lights.
584
00:13:06,827 --> 00:13:08,377
This is how I usually work.
585
00:13:08,379 --> 00:13:10,479
Watch, watch, I'ma nail it now.
586
00:13:10,482 --> 00:13:12,452
All right, do it.
587
00:13:12,448 --> 00:13:16,478
♪ Plenty of bottles is
588
00:13:16,482 --> 00:13:18,102
♪ Going down
589
00:13:18,103 --> 00:13:19,723
♪ Plenty of models crowded
590
00:13:19,724 --> 00:13:21,144
♪ Around ♪
591
00:13:21,137 --> 00:13:21,897
♪ Plenty--
592
00:13:21,896 --> 00:13:22,966
Okay, hold on, man.
593
00:13:22,965 --> 00:13:24,065
Yo, this is some bull[bleep],
594
00:13:24,068 --> 00:13:25,378
man. Turn the lights on, man.
595
00:13:25,379 --> 00:13:26,339
Yeah.
596
00:13:26,344 --> 00:13:27,594
Yo, turn the lights back d--
597
00:13:27,586 --> 00:13:28,476
Turn the lights off, man!
598
00:13:28,482 --> 00:13:29,242
Turn the lights off!
599
00:13:29,241 --> 00:13:30,621
Damn, is that a rash?
600
00:13:30,620 --> 00:13:32,240
Oh!
601
00:13:32,241 --> 00:13:34,211
Okay, let's take five, man.
602
00:13:34,206 --> 00:13:35,166
Years.
603
00:13:35,172 --> 00:13:36,382
Yes.
604
00:13:36,379 --> 00:13:37,899
♪
605
00:13:37,896 --> 00:13:40,786
[cheering and applause]
606
00:13:40,793 --> 00:13:42,483
So tonight is the night.
607
00:13:42,482 --> 00:13:43,412
For the first time,
608
00:13:43,413 --> 00:13:44,283
"Tisha and Duane" will be
609
00:13:44,275 --> 00:13:45,335
shooting before a live studio
610
00:13:45,344 --> 00:13:46,694
audience of screaming fans
611
00:13:46,689 --> 00:13:48,339
who all came just to see who?
612
00:13:48,344 --> 00:13:49,524
And the star of the show,
613
00:13:49,517 --> 00:13:51,407
Mr. Kevin Hart!
614
00:13:51,413 --> 00:13:53,343
You guessed it, me.
615
00:13:53,344 --> 00:13:55,004
[cheering and applause]
616
00:13:55,000 --> 00:13:56,520
One thing is for sure.
617
00:13:56,517 --> 00:13:59,477
No laugh track will be needed.
618
00:13:59,482 --> 00:14:01,032
Come on, man, open the gate.
619
00:14:01,034 --> 00:14:03,004
Look, it's me, Duane Martin
620
00:14:03,000 --> 00:14:04,030
from "Tisha and Duane."
621
00:14:04,034 --> 00:14:06,004
You know me, you've seen me.
622
00:14:06,000 --> 00:14:07,590
Really? 'Cause I'm lookin' at
623
00:14:07,586 --> 00:14:12,066
the billboard, and that's Duane.
624
00:14:12,068 --> 00:14:14,098
Ahh!
625
00:14:14,103 --> 00:14:15,553
I'm Duane!
626
00:14:15,551 --> 00:14:18,481
That's itty-bitty Kevin Hart.
627
00:14:18,482 --> 00:14:19,282
♪ All right, all right
628
00:14:19,275 --> 00:14:19,995
♪ All right
629
00:14:20,000 --> 00:14:20,760
That's him.
630
00:14:20,758 --> 00:14:21,408
Look...
631
00:14:21,413 --> 00:14:22,143
I'm me.
632
00:14:22,137 --> 00:14:22,897
Yeah, look--
633
00:14:22,896 --> 00:14:23,856
Come on, man, open the door.
634
00:14:23,862 --> 00:14:24,592
Sir, I'm gonna have to ask
635
00:14:24,586 --> 00:14:25,376
you to exit the lot.
636
00:14:25,379 --> 00:14:26,479
♪ All right, all right
637
00:14:26,482 --> 00:14:27,972
♪ All right?
638
00:14:27,965 --> 00:14:28,895
Like that?
639
00:14:28,896 --> 00:14:30,276
Stop living in the past, man.
640
00:14:30,275 --> 00:14:31,785
Okay.
641
00:14:31,793 --> 00:14:32,553
[tires screeching]
642
00:14:32,551 --> 00:14:33,971
Hey, hey!
643
00:14:33,965 --> 00:14:35,375
"Django Unchained," repeat,
644
00:14:35,379 --> 00:14:40,169
"Django Unchained!"
645
00:14:40,172 --> 00:14:48,622
[tires squealing]
646
00:14:48,620 --> 00:14:50,450
Duane! Why did you--
647
00:14:50,448 --> 00:14:51,548
Because I wear the pants in
648
00:14:51,551 --> 00:14:52,381
the family.
649
00:14:52,379 --> 00:14:54,099
[audience laughter]
650
00:14:54,103 --> 00:14:55,763
Now I may not have on any now,
651
00:14:55,758 --> 00:14:56,968
but imagine what these balls
652
00:14:56,965 --> 00:14:57,925
look like in denim.
653
00:14:57,931 --> 00:14:59,281
[audience laughter]
654
00:14:59,275 --> 00:15:00,715
Come on, now, you get
655
00:15:00,724 --> 00:15:03,764
the picture?
656
00:15:03,758 --> 00:15:04,408
You gonna let me get
657
00:15:04,413 --> 00:15:05,173
my line out?
658
00:15:05,172 --> 00:15:06,032
Why don't you just keep up,
659
00:15:06,034 --> 00:15:06,794
Tisha, please--
660
00:15:06,793 --> 00:15:08,003
How about I embarrass you--
661
00:15:08,000 --> 00:15:09,000
All right, cut, cut, cut!
662
00:15:09,000 --> 00:15:09,760
How 'bout I do that?
663
00:15:09,758 --> 00:15:10,518
Hey, hey, hey, hey, guys--
664
00:15:10,517 --> 00:15:11,237
I will beat your little ass
665
00:15:11,241 --> 00:15:11,931
back to Lilliput.
666
00:15:11,931 --> 00:15:12,901
I'm not playing with him.
667
00:15:12,896 --> 00:15:13,996
I'm not playing-- and you know
668
00:15:14,000 --> 00:15:15,340
what, he's packing extra.
669
00:15:15,344 --> 00:15:16,724
We didn't ask for all of that!
670
00:15:16,724 --> 00:15:17,484
That wasn't in the contract.
671
00:15:17,482 --> 00:15:18,592
Okay, we'll talk to props.
672
00:15:18,586 --> 00:15:19,786
That's a extra sock!
673
00:15:19,793 --> 00:15:20,623
A extra two socks.
674
00:15:20,620 --> 00:15:22,140
I am a sex symbol!
675
00:15:22,137 --> 00:15:22,897
Please!
676
00:15:22,896 --> 00:15:24,336
Everybody knows that.
677
00:15:24,344 --> 00:15:25,144
Now, now, talk to me,
678
00:15:25,137 --> 00:15:25,857
what's the problem?
679
00:15:25,862 --> 00:15:27,072
Listen, he won't let me
680
00:15:27,068 --> 00:15:28,068
get my line out, Kee.
681
00:15:28,068 --> 00:15:29,408
Oh, for the love of God.
682
00:15:29,413 --> 00:15:30,213
They didn't tell you?
683
00:15:30,206 --> 00:15:31,026
Tell me what?
684
00:15:31,034 --> 00:15:32,004
Harry and Joe, they--
685
00:15:32,000 --> 00:15:32,970
they cut that line.
686
00:15:32,965 --> 00:15:33,995
How did you-- [squeaking]
687
00:15:34,000 --> 00:15:34,790
What?
688
00:15:34,793 --> 00:15:35,793
Everybody else
689
00:15:35,793 --> 00:15:36,483
got the green pages.
690
00:15:36,482 --> 00:15:37,382
There was no green pages,
691
00:15:37,379 --> 00:15:38,659
I read all my pages.
692
00:15:38,655 --> 00:15:39,445
I'm gonna move on
693
00:15:39,448 --> 00:15:40,138
from this because--
694
00:15:40,137 --> 00:15:40,827
No.
695
00:15:40,827 --> 00:15:41,787
--I care about the project,
696
00:15:41,793 --> 00:15:42,693
and I wanna make it better.
697
00:15:42,689 --> 00:15:43,379
Now look,
698
00:15:43,379 --> 00:15:44,099
we got three cameras here.
699
00:15:44,103 --> 00:15:44,863
Right.
700
00:15:44,862 --> 00:15:45,622
I feel like they're all doing
701
00:15:45,620 --> 00:15:46,340
the same thing, they're all--
702
00:15:46,344 --> 00:15:47,004
Yeah, two shots.
703
00:15:47,000 --> 00:15:47,970
Why?
704
00:15:47,965 --> 00:15:49,095
You don't need Tisha's face
705
00:15:49,103 --> 00:15:49,863
in every camera.
706
00:15:49,862 --> 00:15:50,592
Cut it out...
707
00:15:50,586 --> 00:15:51,236
What?
708
00:15:51,241 --> 00:15:53,001
Focus on me, I'm your money.
709
00:15:53,000 --> 00:15:53,860
Use it.
710
00:15:53,862 --> 00:15:55,312
He don't mean it like that.
711
00:15:55,310 --> 00:15:58,310
Oh my God!
712
00:15:58,310 --> 00:15:59,550
Tisha, come on now.
713
00:15:59,551 --> 00:16:00,451
You throw like
714
00:16:00,448 --> 00:16:01,998
JaMarcus Russell.
715
00:16:02,000 --> 00:16:03,340
How about I kick your ass?
716
00:16:03,344 --> 00:16:05,764
Whoa! Joey!
717
00:16:05,758 --> 00:16:06,718
I'm telling you right now,
718
00:16:06,724 --> 00:16:07,974
Nick, you better get this boy
719
00:16:07,965 --> 00:16:08,965
together, or it's gonna be
720
00:16:08,965 --> 00:16:10,715
"The Tisha Show."
721
00:16:10,724 --> 00:16:12,414
Yeah, that'd be a hit.
722
00:16:12,413 --> 00:16:13,833
In 1993.
723
00:16:13,827 --> 00:16:14,927
I heard you!
724
00:16:14,931 --> 00:16:16,691
You better run, you better run.
725
00:16:16,689 --> 00:16:18,719
Run, Nick, run!
726
00:16:18,724 --> 00:16:20,004
What'd you think I had said?
727
00:16:20,000 --> 00:16:22,480
♪ Breathe in, breathe out
728
00:16:22,482 --> 00:16:24,342
Whoo!
729
00:16:24,344 --> 00:16:26,174
Whoa-whoa-whoa, sorry, sir.
730
00:16:26,172 --> 00:16:27,072
They're shooting.
731
00:16:27,068 --> 00:16:28,278
I know, I know, I'm Duane
732
00:16:28,275 --> 00:16:29,585
of "Duane and Tisha."
733
00:16:29,586 --> 00:16:30,476
No.
734
00:16:30,482 --> 00:16:31,522
I'm looking at the billboard
735
00:16:31,517 --> 00:16:32,897
right there.
736
00:16:32,896 --> 00:16:35,656
And that's Duane.
737
00:16:35,655 --> 00:16:40,205
I am Duane, lady!
738
00:16:40,206 --> 00:16:41,446
How 'bout some money?
739
00:16:41,448 --> 00:16:42,828
Huh, you can use that.
740
00:16:42,827 --> 00:16:45,337
They don't pay [bleep] here.
741
00:16:45,344 --> 00:16:49,594
♪
742
00:16:49,586 --> 00:16:52,136
Yo, I cannot record
743
00:16:52,137 --> 00:16:53,027
without seeing.
744
00:16:53,034 --> 00:16:53,974
All right, take your
745
00:16:53,965 --> 00:16:56,065
blindfold off.
746
00:16:56,068 --> 00:16:56,898
Now what?
747
00:16:56,896 --> 00:16:59,716
Turn around, B.
748
00:16:59,724 --> 00:17:00,094
Yeah!
749
00:17:00,086 --> 00:17:02,096
Hello.
750
00:17:02,103 --> 00:17:03,483
What up, B, what's going on
751
00:17:03,482 --> 00:17:04,172
with you, how are things.
752
00:17:04,172 --> 00:17:05,002
Yo, y'all ain't right
753
00:17:05,000 --> 00:17:05,760
for that one.
754
00:17:05,758 --> 00:17:06,468
Eric, Nelly, I got y'all.
755
00:17:06,465 --> 00:17:07,825
I feel it.
756
00:17:07,827 --> 00:17:08,897
Ay yo, I heard you trying
757
00:17:08,896 --> 00:17:10,166
to go solo again, baby.
758
00:17:10,172 --> 00:17:11,412
Man, I was solo
759
00:17:11,413 --> 00:17:12,313
even when I was in the group.
760
00:17:12,310 --> 00:17:14,210
Yeah, we all know, that's why
761
00:17:14,206 --> 00:17:15,276
we got Johnny, remember?
762
00:17:15,275 --> 00:17:16,545
Oh, man, please,
763
00:17:16,551 --> 00:17:17,311
you gonna hook me up with this?
764
00:17:17,310 --> 00:17:18,000
Come on, what's going on?
765
00:17:18,000 --> 00:17:18,660
Yeah, I'm with it.
766
00:17:18,655 --> 00:17:19,375
What you need, what you need?
767
00:17:19,379 --> 00:17:20,479
Ay yo, run it back
768
00:17:20,482 --> 00:17:21,212
one more time.
769
00:17:21,206 --> 00:17:21,966
Now y'all gonna see
770
00:17:21,965 --> 00:17:22,895
what Boston does.
771
00:17:22,896 --> 00:17:24,096
Boston style.
772
00:17:24,103 --> 00:17:25,073
Boston's in the house!
773
00:17:25,068 --> 00:17:26,208
♪ Plenty of bottles
774
00:17:26,206 --> 00:17:28,206
♪ Is going down
775
00:17:28,206 --> 00:17:29,336
♪ Plenty of models
776
00:17:29,344 --> 00:17:30,594
♪ Crowding around
777
00:17:30,586 --> 00:17:31,336
Come on!
778
00:17:31,344 --> 00:17:32,794
♪ I just came here to spend
779
00:17:32,793 --> 00:17:34,413
♪ Some money y'all
780
00:17:34,413 --> 00:17:36,003
♪ Only got one night in town
781
00:17:36,000 --> 00:17:36,720
♪ Come on
782
00:17:36,724 --> 00:17:37,454
♪ Whoo
783
00:17:37,448 --> 00:17:38,208
♪ I told her let me get
784
00:17:38,206 --> 00:17:39,096
♪ Your jersey, that's your
785
00:17:39,103 --> 00:17:40,313
♪ name and your number
786
00:17:40,310 --> 00:17:41,170
♪ I told her let me get
787
00:17:41,172 --> 00:17:42,142
♪ Your jersey, that's your
788
00:17:42,137 --> 00:17:43,277
♪ Name and your number
789
00:17:43,275 --> 00:17:44,235
♪ I told her let me get
790
00:17:44,241 --> 00:17:45,281
♪ Your jersey, I told her
791
00:17:45,275 --> 00:17:46,135
♪ Let me get your jersey
792
00:17:46,137 --> 00:17:47,307
♪ I told her let me get
793
00:17:47,310 --> 00:17:48,380
♪ Your jersey, that's your
794
00:17:48,379 --> 00:17:49,689
♪ Name and your number ♪
795
00:17:49,689 --> 00:17:52,589
[laughing]
796
00:17:52,586 --> 00:17:53,476
Come on, Tisha, I don't
797
00:17:53,482 --> 00:17:54,242
understand why you gotta wear
798
00:17:54,241 --> 00:17:55,381
a Raiders jersey with a number
799
00:17:55,379 --> 00:17:56,309
one on it, the Raiders will
800
00:17:56,310 --> 00:17:57,900
never be number one.
801
00:17:57,896 --> 00:17:58,756
Matter of fact,
802
00:17:58,758 --> 00:17:59,828
talkin' about the Raiders
803
00:17:59,827 --> 00:18:01,337
make me wanna take a number two.
804
00:18:01,344 --> 00:18:03,904
Hey, Duane.
805
00:18:03,896 --> 00:18:05,586
Nice jacket.
806
00:18:05,586 --> 00:18:06,996
I see you got a job on the show
807
00:18:07,000 --> 00:18:08,590
anyway.
808
00:18:08,586 --> 00:18:09,546
I'm here to claim what's
809
00:18:09,551 --> 00:18:10,281
mine, Keenen.
810
00:18:10,275 --> 00:18:11,785
What's that, brother?
811
00:18:11,793 --> 00:18:15,243
My woman and my name.
812
00:18:15,241 --> 00:18:17,141
I am Duane.
813
00:18:17,137 --> 00:18:18,517
Look, man, we don't
814
00:18:18,517 --> 00:18:20,027
want no problems.
815
00:18:20,034 --> 00:18:21,144
Girl, these raggedy drawers
816
00:18:21,137 --> 00:18:23,517
are just a cage for this python.
817
00:18:23,517 --> 00:18:24,657
Python?
818
00:18:24,655 --> 00:18:26,375
More like inchworm.
819
00:18:26,379 --> 00:18:27,829
[audience laughing]
820
00:18:27,827 --> 00:18:28,997
Why is he here?
821
00:18:29,000 --> 00:18:31,410
Because family matters.
822
00:18:31,413 --> 00:18:33,383
[audience laughing]
823
00:18:33,379 --> 00:18:35,409
Eww! What the hell, Kevin,
824
00:18:35,413 --> 00:18:37,243
that's not in the script!
825
00:18:37,241 --> 00:18:38,381
Creative control.
826
00:18:38,379 --> 00:18:39,139
I just added it.
827
00:18:39,137 --> 00:18:40,617
And I just added this.
828
00:18:40,620 --> 00:18:42,030
Night-night, Mitch.
829
00:18:42,034 --> 00:18:42,934
Oh, my God!
830
00:18:42,931 --> 00:18:43,661
[audience groaning]
831
00:18:43,655 --> 00:18:48,165
We got him, we got him!
832
00:18:48,172 --> 00:18:49,522
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
833
00:18:49,517 --> 00:18:50,407
Hold on.
834
00:18:50,413 --> 00:18:52,413
Whoa, stop, stop.
835
00:18:52,413 --> 00:18:55,033
I am Duane!
836
00:18:55,034 --> 00:18:56,664
She got to go!
837
00:18:56,655 --> 00:18:58,545
He got to go, he got to go!
838
00:18:58,551 --> 00:18:59,311
You written out,
839
00:18:59,310 --> 00:19:03,790
you written out!
840
00:19:03,793 --> 00:19:05,413
That's it, that's it.
841
00:19:05,413 --> 00:19:07,103
Down periscope, go night-night.
842
00:19:07,103 --> 00:19:10,173
That's it, that's it, that's it.
843
00:19:10,172 --> 00:19:12,342
Damn.
844
00:19:12,344 --> 00:19:14,554
It's a tough day to be Duane.
845
00:19:14,551 --> 00:19:15,721
Cut!
846
00:19:15,724 --> 00:19:19,244
[bell rings]
♪
50552
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
