Original subtitles

Dear father

I thank you for bringing us together

on the beautiful day

to celebrate the birth of your son.

Father, I want to thank you

for bringing my brother and his family back to us

but mostly

for bringing my brother to surprise you while guiding his steps.

Life is not always been easy.

But I'm living witness to the grace that flows from you

that guides our every move

and the orders are universe when we surrender to your will.

Thank you for my wonderful children

Brie and Jacob

and my loving wife Rebecca.

Thank you for this wonderful food

you have so graciously provided.

May you mighty hand continue

to bring order to our world.

We love you and praise you

in the name of Jesus.

Amen.

Amen. - Amen.

- Amen. - Amen.

Please.

Jacob!

Dig in!

Here you go sweetie.

Nice job on than ham Rebecca.

Oh thank you.

This year I tried a new recipe.

Instead of the regular honey glace

this ham has an apricot glace.

I find it gives the ham a much

richer flavor and.

How is that new territory working out for you Guy?

Great. Just great. Yeah,

car accidents are up 30%

burglaries are going steady

and I tell you people are scared.

They are buying insurance like there is no tomorrow.

I think you should be grateful

to have a job.

Thank you.

Well yeah it�s a job I guess

if you can call legally extorting people a job

but.

The way I see it Guy if you can feed your family

it's a good job.

No, I'm I'm really grateful, I mean

I'm.

Are you hot sweetie?

Just a little.

I open the window.

Rebecca, I'm not paying the heat bill for the whole neighborhood.

But, she is.

Oh, it�s fine

just undo another button honey.

Alright careful now, you gonna watch out for those horny boy.

Dad!

Guy.

I trust you not referring to Jacob.

No. Of course not. I just,

I mean come on she is 16 you know

boys her age have dirty minds I mean.

Isn't that right Brie?

We don't have to worry about Brie either.

Rebecca,

we are out of asparagus.

Oh.

So how is the car business Daniel?

Good.

Holiday sales didn't turn out quite as we expected

but

things could always be worse

which is why I for warn

and grateful to the lord

for what we have.

Here you go sweetie.

You haven't touched your dinner.

I don't want any.

Well you have to eat.

You haven't had any breakfast or lunch today.

Brie!

What's the matter Brie?

Nothing.

Brie!

Nothing!

She is just a little under the weather.

Her stupid boyfriend broke up with her.

Shut up!

Boyfriend?

Boyfriend?

What boyfriend?

Just have some asparagus.

Mom I don't want any.

Brie!

You are going to eat your dinner now!

It's good for you honey.

Look I don't blame her it's not like that is to taste all that great.

Brie when I was your age I hated asparagus

I mean it makes your pee smells funny right.

Guy.

It does. Come on.

I mean it�s like as soon you hit the john�s it starts

wafting right up.

Oh, I guess she is really sick.

For gods sakes Brie!

It's okay.

Jacob honey why don't you and you cousin

go to your room and build your puzzle, okay?

Okay.

Look I got to take a piss.

Uh, excuse me, I go to use the bathroom.

Christmas.

Why now?

Why at Christmas dinner?

Daniel it isn't her fault.

It�s Christmas.

Thank you May

we just clear everything away.

My dad got it for me when he stopped drinking.

Brie has one too.

I like your socks.

Whoo.

You wanna help me finish the puzzle?

That sounds boring.

Its not, it�s fun.

And once you have finished the puzzle it feels great.

Kissing.

Gross, you are my cousin.

What, are you scared?

Rebecca!

Please!

I'm going to see how Brie is doing.

May!

Rebecca or I will check on her.

But thank you.

So what about that kiss?

That�s how you kiss your mother.

Don't you even like girls?

Shut up!

So you are a fag.

No.

Prove it.

Thank you.

Whoops.

What took you so long?

I was using the bathroom.

Dinner is over.

Oh fine Daniel.

So what�s for dessert?

Oh I made some cheesecake with.

Guy!

Please leave my house.

What?

What did I do this time?

Come on.

Just go!

Daniel, please.

Rebecca!

Okay. So is the ex-alcoholic throwing the first stone?

My past is regrettable

but I have tamed my inner demons.

Well I thought we had passed this. I mean

didn't you forgive me

brother!

Dan I'm so sorry,

sometimes he is just a little you know.

Guy I do forgive you

but I won�t not stand for that in my house!

What�s the matter are you afraid that god

is going to send you to hell for having your less

then perfect brother over for Christmas?

I mean what bring down a plague of locust,

or boils,

or what?

For Christ sake Guy can we just go!

What is it Daniel, answer me! - Daniel.

Keep your voices down! - Tell me.

Sure.

You wouldn't want our children to find out just how fucked up we are.

Daniel watch your fucking.

Gwen we are leaving.

Gwen lets go.

186 Dan, Rebecca!

What were you 2 doing in here?

Jacob. Answer me!

Where is your cross?

Where is it?

Answer me Jacob!

What did you do with it?

Where is it?

Answer me!

Tell me!

I hate it. - Daniel!

Its right here.

Daniel!

I wanna talk.

I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.

It's alright.

Mom. Dad.

What�s going on?

It's okay sweetie.

It's okay.

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http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1076777 Asparagus (2007) English.srt Or: Asparagus (2007) English for hearing-impaired.srt FPS: 23.976

With special thanks to: "Jaxson & Liam"

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