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1
00:00:10,486 --> 00:00:13,596
Oh, my hallway-walking God!
2
00:00:13,823 --> 00:00:16,006
I've seen my fair share
of workplace atrocities,
3
00:00:16,142 --> 00:00:18,583
but this one's gonna be
hard not to whistle-blow.
4
00:00:18,677 --> 00:00:20,585
Uh, Carlson, how about you forget
5
00:00:20,679 --> 00:00:23,588
any unkillable irradiated
airborne entities
6
00:00:23,757 --> 00:00:25,332
you think you saw
7
00:00:25,425 --> 00:00:27,759
and sign this nondisclosure agreement?
8
00:00:27,853 --> 00:00:31,596
I'm sorry, I have no choice
but to speak up and say...
9
00:00:31,690 --> 00:00:33,598
what's in it for me?
10
00:00:33,692 --> 00:00:35,785
Guess who just got two
VIP concert tickets
11
00:00:36,012 --> 00:00:37,936
to see Bob Seger tonight!
12
00:00:38,105 --> 00:00:39,455
Bob Seger!
13
00:00:39,682 --> 00:00:41,515
Which Bullet Band is he bringing?
14
00:00:41,608 --> 00:00:42,774
Silver!
15
00:00:42,868 --> 00:00:45,869
In that case, I'm closin' shop early.
16
00:00:48,633 --> 00:00:51,708
Marge, you know how
nothing ever happens to me?
17
00:00:51,877 --> 00:00:54,862
Well, the curse has been lifted!
18
00:00:54,955 --> 00:00:57,197
Oh. I love how excited you are
19
00:00:57,291 --> 00:00:59,642
to chaperone the kids' weekend sleepover
20
00:00:59,793 --> 00:01:01,885
on the World War II battleship.
21
00:01:01,979 --> 00:01:03,813
What?! Chaperoning?
22
00:01:03,964 --> 00:01:06,557
You can't just spring
this on me at the last...
23
00:01:06,725 --> 00:01:10,394
_
24
00:01:10,563 --> 00:01:11,895
D'oh!
25
00:01:12,064 --> 00:01:14,323
Aw, you've got to fill in for me, Marge.
26
00:01:14,474 --> 00:01:16,659
I'd do it for you if
you were the husband.
27
00:01:16,886 --> 00:01:18,494
You always get to do the fun thing
28
00:01:18,645 --> 00:01:20,162
and leave me holding the bag.
29
00:01:20,389 --> 00:01:22,164
I'll get you a new bag.
A tote from the merch table.
30
00:01:22,391 --> 00:01:23,740
What size are you?
31
00:01:23,909 --> 00:01:28,671
No. I'm watching the Gen Gala
red-carpet arrivals tomorrow.
32
00:01:28,898 --> 00:01:31,248
Can't you just record it
and watch it next week
33
00:01:31,342 --> 00:01:33,843
when me and Lenny are at
the Hall & Oates concert?
34
00:01:34,011 --> 00:01:36,494
Oh! I'm hosting the watch party.
35
00:01:36,589 --> 00:01:40,850
I have firm commitments
from several A-level gays.
36
00:01:41,018 --> 00:01:42,667
We're all gonna make snarky comments
37
00:01:42,687 --> 00:01:45,354
about celebrities' outrageous outfits.
38
00:01:45,581 --> 00:01:48,858
I'm working up the courage
to use the B-word on a man.
39
00:01:49,026 --> 00:01:51,026
Okay, honey, I give up.
40
00:01:51,253 --> 00:01:53,302
You host your party.
I go to the concert.
41
00:01:53,337 --> 00:01:54,771
No field trip for the kids.
42
00:01:54,866 --> 00:01:56,924
It was your decision,
so I'll let you tell them.
43
00:01:57,017 --> 00:01:58,942
* Yo-ho, yo-ho *
44
00:01:59,036 --> 00:02:01,662
* A field trip life for me. *
45
00:02:07,545 --> 00:02:08,878
- Whoa!
- Whoa.
46
00:02:09,105 --> 00:02:10,379
Mommy! Mommy!
47
00:02:10,606 --> 00:02:13,883
I took a bite of my juice
box because I forgot!
48
00:02:14,110 --> 00:02:15,776
Ready about, sailors!
49
00:02:15,945 --> 00:02:18,295
Name's Captain Bowditch.
50
00:02:18,389 --> 00:02:20,705
For the next 36 hours,
you will be my crew
51
00:02:20,725 --> 00:02:23,967
aboard the USS ship with a name
we're not allowed to say anymore
52
00:02:24,061 --> 00:02:25,802
and with good reason.
53
00:02:25,897 --> 00:02:29,047
Now, the year is 1943.
54
00:02:29,066 --> 00:02:32,476
We sailors have fought many
battles in the Pacific theater,
55
00:02:32,570 --> 00:02:35,404
but today we face our
most vicious enemy yet:
56
00:02:35,589 --> 00:02:37,055
oxidation.
57
00:02:38,651 --> 00:02:40,576
Kill those lousy Oxies!
58
00:02:40,761 --> 00:02:44,471
Rust has overtaken the vessel,
and I'm giving you three tools
59
00:02:44,640 --> 00:02:47,565
to neutralize the threat:
wire brushes, marine paint,
60
00:02:47,660 --> 00:02:49,476
and the remainder of the weekend.
61
00:02:50,980 --> 00:02:54,792
Chaperones, you will stand watch
in six-hour shifts.
62
00:02:54,827 --> 00:02:55,925
Now, pair up!
63
00:02:57,244 --> 00:02:59,428
Can you imagine getting
stuck with Sarah Wiggum
64
00:02:59,655 --> 00:03:01,004
for the whole weekend?
65
00:03:01,157 --> 00:03:03,415
What's she looking for, a personality?
66
00:03:05,678 --> 00:03:09,254
So, I guess we should figure out
some system to pair up, like...
67
00:03:09,348 --> 00:03:10,648
Oh.
68
00:03:15,671 --> 00:03:17,187
Hey, Sarah, we've met before.
69
00:03:17,339 --> 00:03:19,264
I'm Bart's mom, Marge.
70
00:03:20,639 --> 00:03:21,680
Hi.
71
00:03:22,845 --> 00:03:27,498
So, overnight field trips...
the things we do for our kids.
72
00:03:29,109 --> 00:03:31,018
Kids.
73
00:03:31,111 --> 00:03:32,277
So...
74
00:03:32,371 --> 00:03:34,880
have you ever been on
a battleship before?
75
00:03:36,408 --> 00:03:37,841
Probably.
76
00:03:42,715 --> 00:03:44,622
We're so close, we can read the labels
77
00:03:44,675 --> 00:03:46,883
on the drummer's medications.
78
00:03:46,978 --> 00:03:48,552
Hey, I have that, too.
79
00:03:48,646 --> 00:03:51,814
Mild depression rules!
80
00:03:51,965 --> 00:03:53,816
Eh, nice seats, huh, fellas?
81
00:03:53,985 --> 00:03:56,485
Yeah, Mr. Burns' payoffs
are always the best.
82
00:03:56,712 --> 00:03:59,655
Luckily, I was able to get my
wife to take over chaperoning
83
00:03:59,806 --> 00:04:03,400
some stupid battleship
weekend with Ralphie.
84
00:04:03,569 --> 00:04:05,402
Hey, I saddled my wife with that, too.
85
00:04:05,571 --> 00:04:07,404
Marge and Sarah were okay with that?
86
00:04:07,498 --> 00:04:09,164
Ah, they'll be fine.
87
00:04:09,316 --> 00:04:12,075
Wives, they love
that World War II stuff.
88
00:04:12,169 --> 00:04:14,319
Yeah, they're always
gifting their husbands
89
00:04:14,338 --> 00:04:16,154
books and movies about it,
90
00:04:16,248 --> 00:04:19,566
but you know they're really
buying it for themselves.
91
00:04:19,585 --> 00:04:20,843
Hmm.
92
00:04:21,012 --> 00:04:24,170
And number ten would be...
93
00:04:24,214 --> 00:04:27,165
oh, "telling a funny story."
94
00:04:27,334 --> 00:04:30,410
What are your top ten ways
of starting a conversation?
95
00:04:30,429 --> 00:04:31,854
Talking.
96
00:04:33,916 --> 00:04:35,749
I guess we should get back to the kids.
97
00:04:35,842 --> 00:04:37,175
They're asleep.
98
00:04:37,269 --> 00:04:38,527
What?
99
00:04:41,845 --> 00:04:44,450
Almost midnight? How did it get so late?
100
00:04:45,703 --> 00:04:48,746
Oh. It's only 8:50?
101
00:04:51,358 --> 00:04:55,102
Wait. Did you move the clock ahead
102
00:04:55,195 --> 00:04:57,788
to trick the kids into
going to sleep early?
103
00:04:57,882 --> 00:05:00,198
Sarah, I'm impressed.
104
00:05:00,655 --> 00:05:01,708
Ooh.
105
00:05:01,777 --> 00:05:04,845
A bottle of pocket alcohol.
106
00:05:06,257 --> 00:05:07,372
Ah...
107
00:05:07,541 --> 00:05:09,874
Dang, this is the last
place on earth I want to be.
108
00:05:09,894 --> 00:05:14,638
No offense, Marge, but,
geez, this field trip sucks!
109
00:05:15,792 --> 00:05:18,458
You said all those words!
110
00:05:18,552 --> 00:05:20,218
I'm just quiet.
111
00:05:20,312 --> 00:05:22,646
Even though everyone
thinks I'm an idiot.
112
00:05:22,740 --> 00:05:25,438
No, no, we don't think you're an idiot.
113
00:05:25,473 --> 00:05:26,891
We just think you're boring.
114
00:05:27,575 --> 00:05:28,893
Oops.
115
00:05:32,050 --> 00:05:33,501
Did you bring this from home?
116
00:05:33,536 --> 00:05:36,493
Actually, I got it from Admiral
Dingdong's liquor cabinet.
117
00:05:36,662 --> 00:05:39,663
- It wasn't locked?
- Oh, maybe it was.
118
00:05:39,757 --> 00:05:41,815
Uh, wink.
119
00:05:41,908 --> 00:05:43,408
- _
- Ooh.
120
00:05:43,577 --> 00:05:45,552
I've never done a swig.
121
00:05:46,580 --> 00:05:47,596
Whoa!
122
00:05:49,992 --> 00:05:53,751
Oh, Sarah Wiggum, who are you?
123
00:05:53,920 --> 00:05:57,755
I love Clancy,
but you have no idea what it's like
124
00:05:57,850 --> 00:06:00,609
to be married to a man
with a dangerous job
125
00:06:00,836 --> 00:06:02,945
he's just not good at.
126
00:06:03,172 --> 00:06:04,187
Actually...
127
00:06:04,323 --> 00:06:06,189
And with the way he eats,
128
00:06:06,283 --> 00:06:08,970
each crust he sucks the cheese out of
129
00:06:09,005 --> 00:06:10,101
could be his last.
130
00:06:10,195 --> 00:06:12,195
Maybe I do understand.
131
00:06:12,289 --> 00:06:16,183
It just takes so much work
to be a mom and a wife
132
00:06:16,276 --> 00:06:18,518
and keep the goods in
a tight little package,
133
00:06:18,612 --> 00:06:19,944
if you catch my drift.
134
00:06:20,113 --> 00:06:21,946
Sometimes it feels like he...
135
00:06:22,040 --> 00:06:23,239
Takes me for granted!
136
00:06:23,375 --> 00:06:26,209
Why do his last-minute
man-plans have to ruin
137
00:06:26,378 --> 00:06:29,546
the one day of the year
where I get to be catty?
138
00:06:30,424 --> 00:06:31,496
Hell yeah, sister.
139
00:06:31,531 --> 00:06:33,367
Well, you know what? You and me,
140
00:06:33,535 --> 00:06:36,386
we're like two fun peas in a party pod.
141
00:06:36,555 --> 00:06:38,555
We should do more hangouts.
142
00:06:38,724 --> 00:06:42,559
Oh, I'd like that,
but there's a reason I keep to myself.
143
00:06:42,728 --> 00:06:43,737
Ooh.
144
00:06:43,896 --> 00:06:45,904
Secret reasons.
145
00:06:48,304 --> 00:06:49,391
Oh, no.
146
00:06:50,105 --> 00:06:53,162
What are you doing here?
How did you find me?
147
00:06:53,389 --> 00:06:54,404
Sarah!
148
00:06:55,372 --> 00:06:56,439
Marge!
149
00:07:02,152 --> 00:07:04,339
Please take this bag off my head.
150
00:07:04,566 --> 00:07:05,640
I think whoever you kidnapped
151
00:07:05,676 --> 00:07:08,135
before me was a smoker. Ugh!
152
00:07:09,346 --> 00:07:11,087
Why did you bring her into it?
153
00:07:11,256 --> 00:07:13,015
She's just some vanilla soccer mom.
154
00:07:13,184 --> 00:07:14,683
She doesn't know anything.
155
00:07:14,852 --> 00:07:18,312
Hey, once I start bagging heads,
I can't stop.
156
00:07:19,673 --> 00:07:21,190
Hey, there, Sarah. I see you're hanging
157
00:07:21,417 --> 00:07:22,916
with the Yankee Candle crowd.
158
00:07:23,009 --> 00:07:25,027
Wait. Y-You know these people?
159
00:07:25,196 --> 00:07:28,036
Marge, meet Bette and Erin.
160
00:07:28,071 --> 00:07:29,364
They're my old partners.
161
00:07:29,533 --> 00:07:32,367
In a throuple? Who are the original two?
162
00:07:32,536 --> 00:07:34,185
Partners in crime.
163
00:07:34,205 --> 00:07:36,430
You're a criminal?
164
00:07:36,523 --> 00:07:38,290
Jeebus Crackers!
165
00:07:40,983 --> 00:07:42,100
Hi, Mr. Seger.
166
00:07:42,135 --> 00:07:43,153
Boy, you probably don't remember this,
167
00:07:43,272 --> 00:07:44,880
but I saw you at an airport once,
168
00:07:45,049 --> 00:07:47,274
and I was too nervous to say anything,
169
00:07:47,443 --> 00:07:49,276
and then it wasn't you.
170
00:07:49,445 --> 00:07:51,294
We love you, man! We promised our wives
171
00:07:51,447 --> 00:07:53,780
we'd go on some dumb school field trip,
172
00:07:53,873 --> 00:07:57,184
but when we got these tickets,
we ditched them so fast.
173
00:07:58,287 --> 00:08:00,194
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
174
00:08:00,229 --> 00:08:01,879
You broke a promise to your wives?
175
00:08:02,048 --> 00:08:04,900
A good husband's supposed to be
"Like a Rock."
176
00:08:05,051 --> 00:08:07,385
Because we're all running
"Against the Wind."
177
00:08:07,404 --> 00:08:10,013
Terrible "Night Moves."
178
00:08:10,048 --> 00:08:11,254
Look at this.
179
00:08:11,289 --> 00:08:12,323
Those aren't tour dates.
180
00:08:12,343 --> 00:08:15,327
They're all the times I've
kept commitments to my wife.
181
00:08:17,473 --> 00:08:18,989
"Rock and Roll Never Forgets"
182
00:08:19,141 --> 00:08:21,975
the needs of his coequal life companion.
183
00:08:22,144 --> 00:08:24,235
You sicken me.
184
00:08:24,404 --> 00:08:27,563
Were... were we just Seger-shamed?
185
00:08:27,666 --> 00:08:29,924
Why, the real silver bullet is truth.
186
00:08:30,093 --> 00:08:31,776
We're terrible husbands.
187
00:08:31,928 --> 00:08:34,428
I never should have left
Marge holding the bag.
188
00:08:34,597 --> 00:08:37,098
We've got to go make it up to Bob Seger.
189
00:08:37,266 --> 00:08:39,326
And our wives.
190
00:08:40,695 --> 00:08:42,846
Sarah, you were a crook?
191
00:08:42,864 --> 00:08:44,697
Everything I never knew or
cared to wonder about you
192
00:08:44,866 --> 00:08:46,699
has been a lie.
193
00:08:46,868 --> 00:08:49,461
We weren't crooks. We were thieves.
194
00:08:51,039 --> 00:08:53,831
- _
- Sexy, girlie thieves.
195
00:08:57,120 --> 00:08:59,120
They never saw us coming,
196
00:08:59,288 --> 00:09:01,288
but they loved to watch us walk away.
197
00:09:01,457 --> 00:09:03,716
There's nothing we wouldn't lift.
198
00:09:03,885 --> 00:09:05,143
Wallets. Watches.
199
00:09:05,294 --> 00:09:08,462
MP3 players that held
over a hundred songs.
200
00:09:08,631 --> 00:09:10,315
Man, it was a blast.
201
00:09:10,466 --> 00:09:14,769
Our biggest jobs were brought
to us by a gal named Red.
202
00:09:15,497 --> 00:09:16,497
_
203
00:09:16,498 --> 00:09:18,639
She got a line on some
unsupervised diamonds
204
00:09:18,733 --> 00:09:20,900
in a penthouse safe.
205
00:09:20,994 --> 00:09:23,403
I was the driver, and as always...
206
00:09:23,497 --> 00:09:25,830
the honeypot.
207
00:09:27,465 --> 00:09:28,568
_
208
00:09:30,337 --> 00:09:32,578
Ooh. Ow.
209
00:09:32,747 --> 00:09:33,838
Hey there, blue boy.
210
00:09:34,065 --> 00:09:36,566
I was walking past your big building
211
00:09:36,584 --> 00:09:38,510
and seemed to have sprained my ankle
212
00:09:38,679 --> 00:09:40,679
because of my high flops.
213
00:09:40,830 --> 00:09:42,255
Do you happen to have...
214
00:09:42,424 --> 00:09:44,257
- What, a girlfriend?
- ...an icepack?
215
00:09:45,519 --> 00:09:46,910
I'm sorry. I'm s...
216
00:09:46,928 --> 00:09:48,411
Of course, of course I do.
217
00:09:48,430 --> 00:09:50,689
Uh, this is just my night job,
by the way.
218
00:09:50,916 --> 00:09:53,525
I'm, uh, putting myself through
the police academy. Yeah.
219
00:09:53,694 --> 00:09:56,753
- Isn't that free?
- Well, the first time, yeah.
220
00:09:56,771 --> 00:09:59,698
I love a man in a rented uniform.
221
00:10:02,549 --> 00:10:03,569
_
222
00:10:08,334 --> 00:10:10,208
The kiss was part of the plan.
223
00:10:10,377 --> 00:10:13,269
But falling head over high flops wasn't.
224
00:10:13,362 --> 00:10:15,271
Clancy...
225
00:10:17,962 --> 00:10:20,218
- Oh, no.
- No, no, don't leave.
226
00:10:20,387 --> 00:10:22,554
Come back to pile.
227
00:10:22,723 --> 00:10:24,280
Uh, I gotta go, blue boy.
228
00:10:24,299 --> 00:10:26,616
- I'm sorry.
- Ah, no problem.
229
00:10:26,785 --> 00:10:29,561
- Oh, um, will you marry me?
- Probably!
230
00:10:31,064 --> 00:10:32,956
I was supposed to be the getaway driver.
231
00:10:32,974 --> 00:10:34,791
My best friends were arrested.
232
00:10:34,884 --> 00:10:36,476
And it was all my fault.
233
00:10:36,644 --> 00:10:38,461
Oh, cool your jets.
234
00:10:38,630 --> 00:10:40,129
Yeah, hot jets.
235
00:10:40,298 --> 00:10:42,723
It wasn't your fault we got busted.
236
00:10:42,743 --> 00:10:44,984
We were set up...
237
00:10:45,136 --> 00:10:47,292
- by Red.
- _
238
00:10:51,810 --> 00:10:53,901
She got away with our whole take,
239
00:10:53,920 --> 00:10:55,903
including the Hourglass Diamond.
240
00:10:56,072 --> 00:10:58,481
That backstabbing sack of Spanx.
241
00:10:58,650 --> 00:11:01,593
Wait, so it wasn't my fault
you got caught.
242
00:11:01,762 --> 00:11:05,321
Yeah, and if you hadn't gone
all horndog on that rent-a-cop,
243
00:11:05,340 --> 00:11:06,914
you'd have been locked up, too.
244
00:11:06,933 --> 00:11:08,249
We found Red.
245
00:11:08,417 --> 00:11:10,918
She goes by the name Lindsey Naegle now.
246
00:11:11,087 --> 00:11:12,845
I've heard of her.
247
00:11:12,998 --> 00:11:16,107
She works in various female
executive positions around town.
248
00:11:16,259 --> 00:11:19,260
We've got a plan to steal
that diamond back from her,
249
00:11:19,428 --> 00:11:21,537
and you're gonna help us.
250
00:11:21,597 --> 00:11:23,689
No, I left that life behind me.
251
00:11:23,858 --> 00:11:25,283
I have a husband now,
252
00:11:25,434 --> 00:11:28,269
and a son who's smart in a way
we haven't figured out yet.
253
00:11:28,437 --> 00:11:31,772
Well, it'd be a real shame
if the Chief of Police
254
00:11:31,866 --> 00:11:34,125
found out his wife
was a common criminal.
255
00:11:34,729 --> 00:11:36,443
You never told Clancy?
256
00:11:36,612 --> 00:11:38,538
Let's just say he's always been better
257
00:11:38,690 --> 00:11:40,706
at planting evidence than finding it.
258
00:11:40,875 --> 00:11:43,968
Why don't I just call him
now and tell him everything?
259
00:11:45,697 --> 00:11:46,888
I'm in.
260
00:11:49,367 --> 00:11:50,809
Our wives are missing?
261
00:11:50,960 --> 00:11:52,477
Not unheard of.
262
00:11:52,628 --> 00:11:54,979
Most women have such
an idealized version
263
00:11:55,131 --> 00:11:57,056
of the Second World War in their heads
264
00:11:57,225 --> 00:11:59,150
that when they meet
the cold, hard reality,
265
00:11:59,302 --> 00:12:00,485
they can't face it.
266
00:12:00,636 --> 00:12:01,986
Did you see what happened?
267
00:12:02,155 --> 00:12:04,063
There was but one witness.
268
00:12:04,232 --> 00:12:07,808
Junior Seaman Ralph,
give your account of the watch.
269
00:12:07,828 --> 00:12:11,663
The mommies got new face hats,
then got into a slidey-door car.
270
00:12:12,280 --> 00:12:13,498
Don't worry, I speak Ralph.
271
00:12:13,667 --> 00:12:16,272
Face hats? Slidey-door?
272
00:12:16,411 --> 00:12:18,077
God, they were kidnapped!
273
00:12:19,413 --> 00:12:21,414
And there's only one man bold enough
274
00:12:21,583 --> 00:12:24,175
to kidnap the wives
of the chief of police
275
00:12:24,402 --> 00:12:26,511
and his slightly slimmer acquaintance.
276
00:12:26,662 --> 00:12:28,346
Sarah was kidnapped?
277
00:12:28,497 --> 00:12:31,407
Oh, spare me the act.
We know it was you.
278
00:12:31,426 --> 00:12:33,426
I spare, I swear.
279
00:12:33,595 --> 00:12:36,245
I need your family to
be happy and healthy,
280
00:12:36,264 --> 00:12:39,023
because who else would I
say it would be a shame
281
00:12:39,192 --> 00:12:41,693
if something were to happen to?
282
00:12:41,920 --> 00:12:44,529
Okay, but what about
one of your cronies?
283
00:12:44,756 --> 00:12:47,198
I assure you, you are a beloved figure
284
00:12:47,367 --> 00:12:49,367
amongst my business brethren.
285
00:12:49,536 --> 00:12:51,260
Mm.
286
00:12:51,354 --> 00:12:55,098
You look a lot
like that guy Chief Bungles.
287
00:12:56,343 --> 00:12:58,376
But there's no other
reason to kidnap Sarah.
288
00:12:58,545 --> 00:13:00,436
She's just my little schmoop-a-doop,
289
00:13:00,455 --> 00:13:02,213
and that's all there is to her.
290
00:13:02,382 --> 00:13:04,801
Apparently not.
291
00:13:05,051 --> 00:13:07,385
Perhaps your wives were not kidnapped.
292
00:13:07,554 --> 00:13:11,055
Perhaps they left because
you are selfish men.
293
00:13:11,224 --> 00:13:13,449
That's the only explanation.
294
00:13:13,542 --> 00:13:16,060
It was all about us.
295
00:13:16,229 --> 00:13:18,104
All right, what's the job?
296
00:13:18,105 --> 00:13:19,205
_
297
00:13:19,382 --> 00:13:21,290
Naegle sold the jewels
she ripped off from us
298
00:13:21,459 --> 00:13:23,292
and became a fancy socialite.
299
00:13:23,461 --> 00:13:25,864
She kept the biggest rock for herself.
300
00:13:25,899 --> 00:13:28,531
The Hourglass Diamond...
it's in her tiara.
301
00:13:29,892 --> 00:13:32,135
And we're gonna steal it back
302
00:13:32,228 --> 00:13:34,804
when she wears it
to the Gen Gala, tomorrow.
303
00:13:34,897 --> 00:13:38,565
You're gonna rob the Gen Gala?
304
00:13:39,304 --> 00:13:41,669
Sorry, sorry. Scheme away.
305
00:13:42,981 --> 00:13:45,089
Okay, here's how it's gonna work.
306
00:13:45,241 --> 00:13:47,650
First, we come up through this manhole.
307
00:13:47,819 --> 00:13:48,985
Nope!
308
00:13:49,154 --> 00:13:50,411
Excuse you?
309
00:13:50,579 --> 00:13:52,822
Look, I may not know
anything about heists,
310
00:13:52,991 --> 00:13:56,676
but I am the world's biggest
superfan of the Gen Gala,
311
00:13:56,828 --> 00:13:58,252
and your plan won't work.
312
00:13:58,421 --> 00:14:01,606
- And why not?
- If you did any research,
313
00:14:01,757 --> 00:14:03,924
you'd know Beyonc�'s
going to be carried in
314
00:14:04,093 --> 00:14:06,427
by 20 plus-size gladiators,
315
00:14:06,595 --> 00:14:08,429
who will form a human pyramid
316
00:14:08,597 --> 00:14:10,356
right on top of your way in.
317
00:14:10,508 --> 00:14:11,524
No heist.
318
00:14:11,693 --> 00:14:14,435
If you're so Kmart smart,
how would you get in?
319
00:14:14,603 --> 00:14:17,622
Well, these entrances
will be blocked by fans,
320
00:14:17,791 --> 00:14:19,773
press and authorized stalkers.
321
00:14:19,942 --> 00:14:22,943
The best plan would be
to put on a crazy dress
322
00:14:23,112 --> 00:14:25,037
and sneak in through the red carpet.
323
00:14:25,206 --> 00:14:28,207
Although, you wouldn't
get far without a publicist
324
00:14:28,301 --> 00:14:30,301
who knows everything about the gala.
325
00:14:30,453 --> 00:14:33,546
- Someone like you?
- Yeah.
326
00:14:33,715 --> 00:14:37,049
This vanilla soccer mom
could be our secret weapon.
327
00:14:37,218 --> 00:14:39,902
Me? Join the robbery?
328
00:14:40,315 --> 00:14:41,317
No way!
329
00:14:41,342 --> 00:14:44,056
Stealing is one of the big
"thou shalt nots."
330
00:14:44,225 --> 00:14:45,558
It's not about the cash.
331
00:14:45,727 --> 00:14:47,226
It's about setting things right.
332
00:14:47,395 --> 00:14:50,546
Lindsey Naegle betrayed
us for money and fame,
333
00:14:50,715 --> 00:14:53,825
and all we got are bad prison tattoos.
334
00:14:53,976 --> 00:14:56,068
Aw, duckies!
335
00:14:56,162 --> 00:14:57,737
Marge, aren't you tired
336
00:14:57,905 --> 00:15:00,072
of being underestimated and overlooked?
337
00:15:00,166 --> 00:15:02,000
Together, we can right a wrong
338
00:15:02,151 --> 00:15:04,076
and look damn good doing it.
339
00:15:04,245 --> 00:15:06,629
I've always wanted to say this...
340
00:15:07,749 --> 00:15:09,007
I'm in.
341
00:15:11,719 --> 00:15:12,719
_
342
00:15:15,350 --> 00:15:16,465
This is Kent Brockman outside
343
00:15:16,477 --> 00:15:19,935
the Museum of Generational
Wealth for the annual Gen Gala.
344
00:15:20,094 --> 00:15:22,068
This year's theme is "The Audacity."
345
00:15:22,103 --> 00:15:23,929
A bold contrast to last year's theme:
346
00:15:24,098 --> 00:15:25,473
"The Nerve."
347
00:15:25,600 --> 00:15:27,025
But I'm stuck out here,
348
00:15:27,193 --> 00:15:29,694
where hundreds of nobodies
have gathered to watch
349
00:15:29,845 --> 00:15:32,697
dozens of somebodies
walk up some stairs.
350
00:15:32,924 --> 00:15:34,681
Should we do this without Marge?
351
00:15:34,850 --> 00:15:36,850
This is her favorite
watching-party of the year.
352
00:15:38,613 --> 00:15:41,264
Forget her. I'm jonesing for snark.
353
00:15:41,432 --> 00:15:42,782
Oh, God, would you look at that dress.
354
00:15:42,950 --> 00:15:45,526
Who is the designer,
the Great Pacific Garbage Patch?
355
00:15:45,545 --> 00:15:48,271
- Probably?
- Ah...
356
00:15:48,364 --> 00:15:50,840
Ah, that's the good shade.
357
00:15:53,323 --> 00:15:55,202
The plan's working. We look amazing.
358
00:15:55,221 --> 00:15:57,430
Now, let's get those tickets.
359
00:16:01,744 --> 00:16:03,362
_
360
00:16:15,132 --> 00:16:17,691
The 55 stairs.
361
00:16:17,860 --> 00:16:20,527
The Tanqueray stiletto sharpener.
362
00:16:20,696 --> 00:16:23,272
The Swarovski crystal wheelchair ramp.
363
00:16:23,997 --> 00:16:25,031
Stop gawking.
364
00:16:25,126 --> 00:16:26,792
Where do we let the other girls in?
365
00:16:26,944 --> 00:16:29,536
Right over there, next to... Oh, my God!
366
00:16:29,705 --> 00:16:30,864
Rihanna!
367
00:16:31,449 --> 00:16:34,809
I listen to the clean
versions of all your songs!
368
00:16:37,045 --> 00:16:40,648
Now, let's see if there's
any honey left in this pot.
369
00:16:40,649 --> 00:16:42,049
_
370
00:16:42,384 --> 00:16:45,218
Excuse me, I seemed
to have a pulled a muscle.
371
00:16:45,312 --> 00:16:48,464
Do you have an ice pack
so that my leg can stop...
372
00:16:48,633 --> 00:16:49,875
quivering?
373
00:16:50,651 --> 00:16:52,076
Right away, ma'am.
374
00:16:52,245 --> 00:16:54,620
Oh-ho, hot stuff.
375
00:17:05,332 --> 00:17:06,999
Ugh, no sign of our wives.
376
00:17:07,093 --> 00:17:09,168
We checked out all
their favorite places,
377
00:17:09,336 --> 00:17:11,503
but turns out we don't
pay enough attention
378
00:17:11,656 --> 00:17:12,988
to know what those are.
379
00:17:13,007 --> 00:17:14,506
So I don't know what we did.
380
00:17:14,600 --> 00:17:17,584
It was my distinct
pleasure to watch your son.
381
00:17:17,753 --> 00:17:19,920
I find we are quite simpatico.
382
00:17:20,088 --> 00:17:23,524
Both of us know nothin' about nothin'.
383
00:17:25,186 --> 00:17:26,226
Oh!
384
00:17:26,294 --> 00:17:28,353
Now that's a fluid gender!
385
00:17:28,448 --> 00:17:32,116
I wouldn't mind asking them
their preferred pronouns. Oh!
386
00:17:33,246 --> 00:17:34,843
If I'm not mistaken,
387
00:17:34,862 --> 00:17:38,180
that's how Marge looks when she's happy.
388
00:17:38,199 --> 00:17:39,531
And that's my Sarah!
389
00:17:39,700 --> 00:17:41,125
Come on, Homer.
390
00:17:41,276 --> 00:17:44,545
It looks like this town's got a museum.
391
00:17:45,361 --> 00:17:46,529
_
392
00:17:48,152 --> 00:17:49,591
_
393
00:17:50,711 --> 00:17:52,928
There's Lindsey,
and she's wearing the tiara.
394
00:17:57,960 --> 00:17:59,477
Okay, don't be nervous.
395
00:17:59,628 --> 00:18:02,037
- You can do this.
- Nervous?
396
00:18:02,206 --> 00:18:05,024
This is the best field
trip of my fricking life!
397
00:18:06,227 --> 00:18:09,712
Ms. Naegle, can I just say,
"that dress."
398
00:18:09,730 --> 00:18:12,346
I know, right? You go, girl.
399
00:18:12,733 --> 00:18:14,658
What setting would
you even wash that on?
400
00:18:14,827 --> 00:18:16,719
Delicate? Eco-warm?
401
00:18:16,737 --> 00:18:19,830
I bet it would make so much
noise in the dryer, right?
402
00:18:21,667 --> 00:18:24,226
Um, I don't want this to sound harsh,
403
00:18:24,245 --> 00:18:26,729
but you're not famous,
so you don't exist.
404
00:18:26,897 --> 00:18:27,898
Bye now.
405
00:18:27,915 --> 00:18:30,733
Darling, stop talking
to that empty chair
406
00:18:30,826 --> 00:18:33,469
and come take a selfie at
the Fenty lip gloss fountain.
407
00:18:39,829 --> 00:18:41,477
Oh, it's a fake!
408
00:18:41,849 --> 00:18:43,178
_
409
00:18:43,247 --> 00:18:44,504
I've been robbed!
410
00:18:44,524 --> 00:18:47,340
Somebody stop those two nobodies!
411
00:18:47,360 --> 00:18:48,369
Keep it cool.
412
00:18:48,528 --> 00:18:49,537
We just have to slip out of here
413
00:18:49,695 --> 00:18:51,253
without anyone noticing us.
414
00:18:54,182 --> 00:18:56,683
Sarah Wiggum, freeze!
415
00:18:57,928 --> 00:19:01,705
We're here to give you ladies
the attention you deserve!
416
00:19:09,698 --> 00:19:12,107
Shh! Now is not the time, Clancy.
417
00:19:12,276 --> 00:19:14,276
No, no, when it comes to love,
418
00:19:14,445 --> 00:19:16,703
it's always the time for shouting!
419
00:19:16,872 --> 00:19:18,705
Sar-ah Wig-gum!
420
00:19:18,874 --> 00:19:20,783
Schmoop-a-doop!
421
00:19:20,951 --> 00:19:23,877
Shmoop-ba-da-doopa!
422
00:19:24,046 --> 00:19:26,455
- I love Sa...
- Shut up!
423
00:19:26,624 --> 00:19:28,566
Oh, God, ow.
424
00:19:28,793 --> 00:19:31,810
- Sarah Wiggum, who are you?
- That's her!
425
00:19:31,979 --> 00:19:33,195
She's the thief!
426
00:19:49,088 --> 00:19:51,383
Babe, who is she?
427
00:19:51,418 --> 00:19:52,664
This is my new girlfriend.
428
00:19:52,833 --> 00:19:55,075
You were tumbling for a long time.
429
00:19:55,243 --> 00:19:56,835
Oh, you poor thing.
430
00:19:56,929 --> 00:19:58,837
Here's your bag, sweetie.
431
00:19:58,989 --> 00:20:00,030
Oopsie!
432
00:20:00,082 --> 00:20:01,414
Those aren't mine!
433
00:20:01,583 --> 00:20:03,813
- My earrings!
- My blood diamond!
434
00:20:03,848 --> 00:20:05,692
My conflict tennis bracelet!
435
00:20:05,693 --> 00:20:09,148
_
436
00:20:10,425 --> 00:20:14,353
Oh, this time, leave me holding the bag.
437
00:20:14,521 --> 00:20:16,280
Aw, thanks, Homie.
438
00:20:16,431 --> 00:20:18,616
But they're part of the ensemble.
439
00:20:22,904 --> 00:20:24,588
Chalamet looks like dirt.
440
00:20:24,739 --> 00:20:26,982
BTS looks like seven dirts.
441
00:20:27,000 --> 00:20:29,668
I see nerve there but nothing audacious.
442
00:20:29,762 --> 00:20:32,763
Oh. My. God.
443
00:20:32,914 --> 00:20:34,264
Jeebus Crackers!
444
00:20:34,416 --> 00:20:35,507
That's Marge!
445
00:20:35,676 --> 00:20:39,269
What the hell is she
doing at the Gen Gala?
446
00:20:39,438 --> 00:20:41,521
Exactly. She looks like dirt.
447
00:20:42,849 --> 00:20:44,942
It's what she would have wanted.
448
00:20:57,956 --> 00:20:59,623
Oh, Clancy.
449
00:20:59,866 --> 00:21:03,518
So, this whole time,
I've been married to a master criminal.
450
00:21:03,537 --> 00:21:05,295
Damn straight.
451
00:21:08,892 --> 00:21:11,259
Wait, wait, uh, where's Ralph?
452
00:21:12,713 --> 00:21:14,713
I must confess,
453
00:21:14,865 --> 00:21:16,364
I thought putting crushed-up Oreos
454
00:21:16,533 --> 00:21:19,125
into the cookies and cream
yogurt would be redundant.
455
00:21:19,144 --> 00:21:22,887
Instead, it is transcendent.
456
00:21:23,389 --> 00:21:25,874
I like to smoosh the gummy bears.
457
00:21:25,967 --> 00:21:27,651
Hey, no touching!
458
00:21:27,802 --> 00:21:32,380
If the boy wants to smoosh,
the boy will smoosh.
459
00:21:32,549 --> 00:21:34,549
I love you, scary daddy.
460
00:21:34,718 --> 00:21:38,662
I love you too, Ralphie "Stickie Hands."
461
00:21:42,150 --> 00:21:43,667
Shh!
462
00:21:46,213 --> 00:21:49,296
- synced and corrected by sot26 -
www.addic7ed.com
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