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Previously on Wynonna Earp...
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I'd just back off a tidge if I were you.
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00:00:10,272 --> 00:00:12,198
- (DEEP VOICE): Rachel.
- Billy?
4
00:00:12,203 --> 00:00:13,500
I want to go home.
5
00:00:13,505 --> 00:00:16,240
- I'm getting married.
- (NICOLE): It's the public stuff.
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00:00:16,245 --> 00:00:17,671
It's good to see you, Sheriff Haught.
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These days, it's just Nicole.
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00:00:18,780 --> 00:00:21,415
Nicole, it's good to see you again.
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00:00:21,420 --> 00:00:24,388
(NICOLE): Mam helped her get
Waverly out of the garden
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00:00:24,393 --> 00:00:26,161
in exchange for you.
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00:00:26,166 --> 00:00:27,766
- Vampire!
- (DOC): The only thing
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00:00:27,771 --> 00:00:29,538
Wynonna detests more than demons
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- is her exes.
- Murder her.
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00:00:30,948 --> 00:00:32,849
- Yah!
- Untie me!
15
00:00:32,854 --> 00:00:33,954
(DEMON GROWLING)
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00:00:33,959 --> 00:00:35,527
You could just call him, you know.
17
00:00:38,163 --> 00:00:40,497
(WESTERN MUSIC)
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00:00:42,167 --> 00:00:44,097
Really trying for high noon, Haught?
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00:00:44,102 --> 00:00:46,334
Isn't that what you say
after a night of drinking?
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00:00:46,339 --> 00:00:47,339
"Hi, noon".
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00:00:47,344 --> 00:00:48,410
Oh...
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00:00:49,107 --> 00:00:51,671
Only I make fun of my drinking.
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00:00:51,676 --> 00:00:54,875
(GRUNTING, THUDDING)
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00:00:54,880 --> 00:00:56,910
(UPTEMPO MUSIC)
25
00:00:56,915 --> 00:00:58,245
(WYNONNA EXHALES)
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00:00:58,250 --> 00:00:59,681
Gonna use your fianc�e's nunchuks?
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00:00:59,686 --> 00:01:01,011
My fists are my nunchuks.
28
00:01:01,016 --> 00:01:02,112
Oh yeah?
29
00:01:02,117 --> 00:01:04,685
(MUSIC RESUMES)
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(NICOLE SCREAMS)
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Oh, you dirty bitch!
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Eighteen months to practice,
all you got is older.
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00:01:14,132 --> 00:01:16,000
(MUSIC RESUMES)
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00:01:17,869 --> 00:01:19,299
(NICOLE LAUGHS) Oh, no!
35
00:01:19,304 --> 00:01:20,467
(WYNONNA GRUNTING)
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00:01:20,472 --> 00:01:23,336
Hey! Only I sweep her off her feet.
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00:01:23,341 --> 00:01:25,339
Ugh... Really with the
schmoop right now?
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00:01:25,344 --> 00:01:27,808
- (NICOLE GRUNTS)
- I don't know who to cheer for.
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00:01:27,813 --> 00:01:28,813
Cheer for fitness.
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00:01:28,818 --> 00:01:30,043
Wrong!
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00:01:30,048 --> 00:01:31,478
Cheer for me,
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00:01:31,483 --> 00:01:33,079
'cause I got Hunt for Red Haughtober
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00:01:33,084 --> 00:01:35,715
off the homestead and
into her place of work.
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00:01:35,720 --> 00:01:38,218
The only work I'm doing
is punching in at the...
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00:01:38,223 --> 00:01:40,353
punching your face factory.
46
00:01:40,358 --> 00:01:41,955
Hmm. You sure?
47
00:01:41,960 --> 00:01:44,457
Cop shop's just right over there!
48
00:01:44,462 --> 00:01:46,726
- Across the hall.
- Yeah! Why not just...
49
00:01:46,731 --> 00:01:48,762
boop on over there real quick. No?
50
00:01:48,767 --> 00:01:50,497
- (NICOLE): Hmm?
- You know, just for fun!
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00:01:50,502 --> 00:01:51,832
Et tu, Earps?
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00:01:51,837 --> 00:01:53,633
You lured me here under false pretenses.
53
00:01:53,638 --> 00:01:55,239
(SIGHING): Nicole.
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00:01:56,308 --> 00:01:59,706
Purgatory needs a sheriff,
and it's gotta be you.
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00:01:59,711 --> 00:02:02,142
Everyone in town is saying so, right?
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00:02:02,147 --> 00:02:04,274
Well, that's really, really gratifying
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00:02:04,279 --> 00:02:06,076
'cause they didn't vote
for me so they don't get me.
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00:02:06,080 --> 00:02:07,180
Didn't you once say,
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00:02:07,185 --> 00:02:09,360
"Everything good I have
in my life is because
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00:02:09,365 --> 00:02:11,095
I came back to the
Ghost River Triangle"?
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00:02:11,100 --> 00:02:12,326
Didn't you once say, "Eat a dick"
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00:02:12,330 --> 00:02:13,859
to a bunch of vampires?
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00:02:13,864 --> 00:02:15,528
I should have said, "suck a dick".
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00:02:15,533 --> 00:02:18,323
Look, if this is guilt over
what happened with Doc...
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00:02:18,327 --> 00:02:20,627
Whoa, wow, would you look at the time.
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00:02:20,632 --> 00:02:22,633
It's whatever o'clock, and
I have a wedding to plan.
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00:02:22,637 --> 00:02:25,332
- See you at trivia tonight.
- (WYNONNA): Wow.
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00:02:25,337 --> 00:02:28,068
That parent trap would
have made Lohan puke.
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00:02:28,073 --> 00:02:29,636
We barely even got a nibble.
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00:02:29,641 --> 00:02:31,073
And there's still a lineup of people
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00:02:31,077 --> 00:02:32,406
in the sheriff's office.
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(SIGHING)
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00:02:34,147 --> 00:02:37,912
- I was also not voted for.
- Come on.
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00:02:37,917 --> 00:02:41,048
It's not like BBD's given you
an assignment this week.
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00:02:41,053 --> 00:02:43,851
The town's nice and quiet.
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00:02:43,856 --> 00:02:45,590
(SIGHING)
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(PANTING)
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- (SOFT THUD)
- Oh!
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Holy shit!
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00:02:57,702 --> 00:03:00,304
The Earp heir is gonna hate this.
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00:03:01,506 --> 00:03:03,670
She's gonna kill us.
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00:03:03,675 --> 00:03:05,176
She's gonna kill me!
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00:03:05,744 --> 00:03:07,574
(MUTTERING)
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00:03:07,579 --> 00:03:09,643
Oh, noo!
85
00:03:09,648 --> 00:03:12,479
(HOWLING)
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(THEME MUSIC)
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00:03:16,828 --> 00:03:20,026
? Cause I gave you all I got to give ?
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00:03:20,031 --> 00:03:22,329
? I know that ain't no way to live ?
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00:03:22,334 --> 00:03:27,167
? I told that devil to take you back ?
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00:03:27,172 --> 00:03:32,409
? I told that devil to take you back ?
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00:03:33,505 --> 00:03:34,634
(SOFT COUNTRY MUSIC)
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00:03:34,639 --> 00:03:36,636
Hands off!
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00:03:36,641 --> 00:03:39,673
Only active-duty police drink
for free at my Shorty's.
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00:03:39,678 --> 00:03:41,608
Well, I'm sheriff emeritus.
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00:03:41,613 --> 00:03:43,910
Sheriff avoidus, more like it.
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00:03:43,915 --> 00:03:45,745
Help me set up for trivia night.
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00:03:45,750 --> 00:03:48,481
Okay, fine, but no more sheriff talk.
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00:03:48,486 --> 00:03:49,983
Everybody keeps asking me.
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00:03:49,988 --> 00:03:51,585
Well, you were the best...
100
00:03:51,590 --> 00:03:53,520
since yours truly.
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00:03:53,525 --> 00:03:55,455
I filled out the slacks a little better.
102
00:03:55,460 --> 00:03:58,391
Know what I would like to talk about?
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00:03:58,396 --> 00:04:00,297
Hints for tonight's trivia.
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00:04:01,399 --> 00:04:03,830
What local deputy had
the highest clearance rate
105
00:04:03,835 --> 00:04:07,567
in the Ghost River Triangle
of the past ten years?
106
00:04:07,572 --> 00:04:10,074
It's just not for me anymore.
107
00:04:11,409 --> 00:04:12,672
You know, that sounds like
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00:04:12,677 --> 00:04:14,307
a fancy way of saying you're butthurt.
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(SCOFFING)
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00:04:16,214 --> 00:04:18,044
Why would I be butthurt?
111
00:04:18,049 --> 00:04:19,613
- Wait, what have you heard?
- Nothing.
112
00:04:19,618 --> 00:04:20,981
Why, did you do something?
113
00:04:20,986 --> 00:04:23,180
I'm too busy, okay? I've got Rachel.
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She's a full-time job.
115
00:04:24,890 --> 00:04:26,119
And yet you're in the dark
116
00:04:26,124 --> 00:04:28,154
about what she did at her part-time job.
117
00:04:28,159 --> 00:04:29,423
Oh no. Where'd she puke?
118
00:04:29,428 --> 00:04:32,363
It's her invisible monster
boyfriend downstairs.
119
00:04:33,431 --> 00:04:34,898
Damn it. She let him out.
120
00:04:37,836 --> 00:04:39,532
Ugh! Don't tell me,
121
00:04:39,537 --> 00:04:42,365
community watch clocked someone
mowing their lawn in the buff.
122
00:04:42,370 --> 00:04:43,370
What's up?
123
00:04:43,375 --> 00:04:44,605
This life or death, Gil?
124
00:04:44,610 --> 00:04:46,637
Every pharmacy is out of moisturizer.
125
00:04:46,642 --> 00:04:49,542
Trag'. Also, come on, man.
126
00:04:49,547 --> 00:04:51,711
Where's Sheriff Clayborn?
127
00:04:51,716 --> 00:04:53,213
Uh...
128
00:04:53,218 --> 00:04:56,183
Wintering on a kibbutz. Let's see,
129
00:04:56,188 --> 00:04:59,786
any of these complaints
not read like a Yelp review?
130
00:04:59,791 --> 00:05:04,190
"My neighbour put Guy Fieri
ass flames on his car?"
131
00:05:04,195 --> 00:05:05,725
Who cares?!
132
00:05:05,730 --> 00:05:07,727
Oh, this one's legit.
133
00:05:07,732 --> 00:05:08,992
If I ask for shredded lettuce,
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00:05:08,997 --> 00:05:10,598
you better believe I
don't want full leaf.
135
00:05:10,602 --> 00:05:13,600
Look. These people are
under a lot of stress.
136
00:05:13,605 --> 00:05:15,101
Supply runs have halted.
137
00:05:15,106 --> 00:05:16,670
Cupboards are bare.
138
00:05:16,675 --> 00:05:19,172
Not to mention everything else
that happens around here.
139
00:05:19,177 --> 00:05:20,240
Exactly.
140
00:05:20,245 --> 00:05:23,443
So much happens here, so relax!
141
00:05:23,448 --> 00:05:25,111
Go outside.
142
00:05:25,116 --> 00:05:27,080
It's above zero out there!
143
00:05:27,085 --> 00:05:29,553
'Cause right now, things are fine.
144
00:05:30,522 --> 00:05:31,885
We offed Pumpkin-head.
145
00:05:31,890 --> 00:05:34,821
Amon's disappeared into
the ether, we're good.
146
00:05:34,826 --> 00:05:37,928
Ah yeah! You brought the lattes!
147
00:05:38,897 --> 00:05:41,061
(GRUNTING) Oh...
148
00:05:41,066 --> 00:05:42,166
Sorry.
149
00:05:44,135 --> 00:05:46,199
No, this, this isn't mine.
150
00:05:46,204 --> 00:05:51,604
Not your... cherry pie that you
spilled all over your apron?
151
00:05:51,609 --> 00:05:55,341
Not my cherry pie. But a cherry pie,
152
00:05:55,346 --> 00:05:56,776
which we need to investigate
153
00:05:56,781 --> 00:05:59,412
because whoever's making these
cherry pies is still out there
154
00:05:59,417 --> 00:06:01,982
and they might, uh...
155
00:06:01,987 --> 00:06:03,454
bake again.
156
00:06:03,855 --> 00:06:05,680
- Nice.
- You are terrible at codes.
157
00:06:05,685 --> 00:06:08,353
- Damn.
- Go jerk off about it, Gil.
158
00:06:10,595 --> 00:06:12,029
So where is this...
159
00:06:12,831 --> 00:06:14,331
... murdered pie?
160
00:06:18,236 --> 00:06:19,567
Didn't there used to be a morgue?
161
00:06:19,571 --> 00:06:22,235
- Oh yeah!
- Yeah, the rats took it over.
162
00:06:22,240 --> 00:06:23,603
Ah, good for them.
163
00:06:23,608 --> 00:06:26,143
- Who's the stiff?
- Ricky Brock.
164
00:06:26,678 --> 00:06:29,075
- What a tragedy.
- Left a wife and little kids?
165
00:06:29,080 --> 00:06:30,210
No. A real loner,
166
00:06:30,215 --> 00:06:32,049
and, by all accounts,
a real jerk, but...
167
00:06:34,019 --> 00:06:35,515
he won Shorty's Trivia last week.
168
00:06:35,520 --> 00:06:37,254
Oh, my god!
169
00:06:38,356 --> 00:06:39,753
Is that tragic?
170
00:06:39,758 --> 00:06:41,221
No, I mean, uh...
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00:06:41,226 --> 00:06:42,856
he was part of the community.
172
00:06:42,861 --> 00:06:45,734
Well, our community, not yours,
obviously, 'cause you lost.
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00:06:45,739 --> 00:06:47,695
I know I was eliminated, but
how was I supposed to know
174
00:06:47,699 --> 00:06:49,629
Tobey Maguire isn't Spider-Man anymore?
175
00:06:49,634 --> 00:06:51,731
- We all know.
- Well, on the bright side,
176
00:06:51,736 --> 00:06:52,766
at least it means that
177
00:06:52,771 --> 00:06:54,435
Ricky won't be at
tonight's Trivia finals!
178
00:06:54,439 --> 00:06:55,506
True!
179
00:06:57,142 --> 00:06:59,105
I am so sorry.
180
00:06:59,110 --> 00:07:01,541
- That is not a bright side.
- No.
181
00:07:01,546 --> 00:07:04,044
Y'all brainiacs really got
your priorities out of whack.
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00:07:04,048 --> 00:07:05,311
Before I got knocked out,
183
00:07:05,316 --> 00:07:06,913
I was obsessed with trivia night too.
184
00:07:06,918 --> 00:07:09,620
That aside, look at this.
185
00:07:11,723 --> 00:07:14,191
Whoa! (CHUCKLING)
186
00:07:16,094 --> 00:07:17,790
Okay, my turn to react inappropriately,
187
00:07:17,794 --> 00:07:19,493
but we're all seeing the
vampire bite marks, right?
188
00:07:19,497 --> 00:07:20,527
(WAVERLY): Yeah.
189
00:07:20,532 --> 00:07:22,395
If Mr. "I Don't Shoot
People in the Back"
190
00:07:22,400 --> 00:07:24,900
still bites people in the neck,
I guess I'm not so bad anymore.
191
00:07:24,905 --> 00:07:26,839
And even if I am, so is he.
192
00:07:27,806 --> 00:07:29,940
You don't need an excuse
to go talk to Doc.
193
00:07:31,076 --> 00:07:32,672
I don't want to talk to him.
194
00:07:32,677 --> 00:07:34,174
(SNIFFLING): I need to talk to him
195
00:07:34,179 --> 00:07:37,114
about the... poor...
196
00:07:40,018 --> 00:07:41,818
Doc couldn't have done this, right?
197
00:07:48,960 --> 00:07:51,762
(OMINOUS MUSIC)
198
00:07:52,898 --> 00:07:53,993
No.
199
00:07:53,998 --> 00:07:56,867
No, no, no, no, no!
200
00:08:06,990 --> 00:08:09,992
(ROCK MUSIC)
201
00:08:11,795 --> 00:08:13,459
It's a yes from me, dawg.
202
00:08:13,464 --> 00:08:15,727
So we decoupled the caboose,
203
00:08:15,732 --> 00:08:17,368
but then my boys and I,
204
00:08:17,373 --> 00:08:20,973
we realized that the greenbacks,
they're in another car...
205
00:08:22,106 --> 00:08:24,603
I have great stories too.
206
00:08:24,608 --> 00:08:27,706
Mostly about killing demons.
207
00:08:27,711 --> 00:08:30,411
- With this gun.
- (DOC): It's okay,
208
00:08:30,416 --> 00:08:31,950
you are safe.
209
00:08:33,083 --> 00:08:34,981
You wanna tell everyone
you're not here to kill them?
210
00:08:34,985 --> 00:08:36,215
Not everyone.
211
00:08:36,220 --> 00:08:37,950
Doc, I uh,
212
00:08:37,955 --> 00:08:40,852
need a private interrogation
with your moustache.
213
00:08:40,857 --> 00:08:42,291
(BLOWING RASPBERRY)
214
00:08:51,902 --> 00:08:52,902
Hey.
215
00:08:53,670 --> 00:08:55,334
It's okay. I get it.
216
00:08:55,339 --> 00:08:58,103
You're a vamp. You got the hungs,
217
00:08:58,108 --> 00:08:59,608
that guy was num-nums.
218
00:09:00,844 --> 00:09:03,909
Welcome back to the moral low ground.
219
00:09:03,914 --> 00:09:05,477
There's a great mattress down here
220
00:09:05,482 --> 00:09:07,517
we could absolutely demolish.
221
00:09:08,018 --> 00:09:09,982
What you're implying...
222
00:09:09,987 --> 00:09:11,487
is faulty.
223
00:09:12,696 --> 00:09:16,929
I have devised a morally
sound way to satisfy my needs.
224
00:09:16,934 --> 00:09:19,298
Morally sound?
225
00:09:19,303 --> 00:09:22,434
Um. You're chilling at a demon bar.
226
00:09:22,439 --> 00:09:25,938
They may be demons, but
even they would never...
227
00:09:25,943 --> 00:09:27,372
Oh, shoot someone in the back?
228
00:09:27,377 --> 00:09:28,540
Well, how about the front?
229
00:09:28,545 --> 00:09:30,746
(GROWLING)
230
00:09:32,082 --> 00:09:33,649
(DALLAS): You alright, Doc?
231
00:09:35,018 --> 00:09:36,419
He's fine.
232
00:09:38,388 --> 00:09:40,552
Hey. Weirdest thing...
233
00:09:40,557 --> 00:09:43,422
Some demon with fangs killed a human.
234
00:09:43,427 --> 00:09:45,194
Any of you have any idea who did it?
235
00:09:48,031 --> 00:09:51,196
No one here has information for you.
236
00:09:51,201 --> 00:09:53,031
But I will keep my ear to the ground.
237
00:09:53,036 --> 00:09:55,534
From now, on I suggest
238
00:09:55,539 --> 00:09:59,705
you do not just pop into The Glory Hole.
239
00:09:59,710 --> 00:10:03,779
Well, isn't that the point
of a glory hole?
240
00:10:06,750 --> 00:10:08,317
Since when do you have minions?
241
00:10:16,894 --> 00:10:19,391
Goddamn law enforcement.
242
00:10:19,396 --> 00:10:22,064
The gun does tend to go to their head.
243
00:10:26,704 --> 00:10:29,101
Hey Lil' Mama.
244
00:10:29,106 --> 00:10:31,240
What's... shakin'?
245
00:10:32,542 --> 00:10:34,773
Right, okay. (INHALING DEEPLY)
246
00:10:34,778 --> 00:10:36,775
Any idea why I might've called you here?
247
00:10:36,780 --> 00:10:38,477
You so want me to be gay, don't you?
248
00:10:38,482 --> 00:10:41,667
Well, we would support you
and buy you the right albums,
249
00:10:41,672 --> 00:10:43,582
but...
250
00:10:43,587 --> 00:10:45,554
nice deflection. Billy.
251
00:10:46,490 --> 00:10:47,923
What happened?
252
00:10:49,226 --> 00:10:50,656
You were there.
253
00:10:50,661 --> 00:10:51,927
Typical teen stuff.
254
00:10:54,631 --> 00:10:56,662
We should have told you
he was in the basement.
255
00:10:56,667 --> 00:10:58,630
The Clantons turned him into that thing.
256
00:10:58,635 --> 00:11:00,035
And you said we'd fix him.
257
00:11:00,040 --> 00:11:01,240
And from now on,
258
00:11:01,245 --> 00:11:03,711
we're gonna talk more openly
about our problems.
259
00:11:03,716 --> 00:11:05,716
Like Chicken-kicker?
260
00:11:05,721 --> 00:11:08,061
- Rachel. You promised!
- I'm sorry!
261
00:11:08,066 --> 00:11:10,130
- Rachel. You swore!
- Nicole, I'm sorry!
262
00:11:10,135 --> 00:11:13,800
You do not speak about
that, ever. Ever, Rachel!
263
00:11:13,805 --> 00:11:15,969
I'm just... I'm just worked up.
264
00:11:15,974 --> 00:11:19,177
Okay, my never-BF turned
into an invisible monster.
265
00:11:21,725 --> 00:11:25,257
For what it's worth, he seemed
really weak when I let him out.
266
00:11:25,262 --> 00:11:26,796
Not a threat at all.
267
00:11:28,398 --> 00:11:29,799
But I'm still sorry.
268
00:11:32,602 --> 00:11:33,936
Hey.
269
00:11:38,638 --> 00:11:39,638
What are we listening to?
270
00:11:39,643 --> 00:11:41,840
A podcast about Gaga.
271
00:11:41,845 --> 00:11:43,875
What? You sure you're not even bi?
272
00:11:43,880 --> 00:11:45,410
(CHUCKLING)
273
00:11:45,415 --> 00:11:48,113
You know, he'd forgive you too. Doc.
274
00:11:48,118 --> 00:11:50,086
If you just told him why.
275
00:11:54,124 --> 00:11:55,424
Hey.
276
00:11:57,627 --> 00:11:59,825
(JEREMY EXHALING): Do not start.
277
00:11:59,830 --> 00:12:01,860
I know my heels aren't
touching the ground.
278
00:12:01,865 --> 00:12:03,628
I was gonna mention the two stiffs.
279
00:12:03,633 --> 00:12:05,964
Oh. Yeah.
280
00:12:05,969 --> 00:12:07,966
It was on me to drag in the second body.
281
00:12:07,971 --> 00:12:10,068
- I hurt my back.
- Oh...
282
00:12:10,073 --> 00:12:13,609
Number two here is trivia
nights' latest winner.
283
00:12:15,345 --> 00:12:16,541
Niles!
284
00:12:16,546 --> 00:12:18,443
The butcher? Ugh!
285
00:12:18,448 --> 00:12:20,312
He knew all the capital cities.
286
00:12:20,317 --> 00:12:21,480
He even got Dodoma!
287
00:12:21,485 --> 00:12:22,818
(SCOFFING)
288
00:12:23,617 --> 00:12:25,617
We should focus on other things.
289
00:12:25,622 --> 00:12:27,986
- Yeah.
- Like, how did this happen?
290
00:12:27,991 --> 00:12:29,454
Did Doc?
291
00:12:29,459 --> 00:12:32,290
That's what I thought at first, but...
292
00:12:32,295 --> 00:12:33,629
look at this.
293
00:12:34,698 --> 00:12:35,727
Bite marks.
294
00:12:35,732 --> 00:12:37,633
Well, actually...
295
00:12:39,002 --> 00:12:41,202
Those are too far apart to be teeth.
296
00:12:41,207 --> 00:12:43,668
That means our beautiful
cowboy is in the clear, but...
297
00:12:43,673 --> 00:12:46,338
Hey, what is going on with
him and Wynonna anyway?
298
00:12:46,343 --> 00:12:48,340
Doc thinks that... (SIGHING)
299
00:12:48,345 --> 00:12:52,511
since Wynonna shot Holt,
she's off the chain.
300
00:12:52,516 --> 00:12:53,883
Is she?
301
00:12:56,186 --> 00:12:57,553
Huh.
302
00:12:58,255 --> 00:12:59,755
Does this seem light to you?
303
00:13:01,792 --> 00:13:03,626
Yeah. Kinda.
304
00:13:09,266 --> 00:13:10,866
Whoa! Waverly!
305
00:13:12,068 --> 00:13:14,399
- There's nothing obstructing it.
- It's empty!
306
00:13:14,404 --> 00:13:15,434
(JEREMY): Whoa.
307
00:13:15,439 --> 00:13:16,835
No brains.
308
00:13:16,840 --> 00:13:18,240
Try number one!
309
00:13:19,876 --> 00:13:21,143
(GASPS)
310
00:13:21,678 --> 00:13:23,675
- Weirdly satisfying.
- Yeah!
311
00:13:23,680 --> 00:13:26,415
So what, it's a brain-stealing demon?
312
00:13:27,284 --> 00:13:29,748
Why would they want human brains?
313
00:13:29,753 --> 00:13:32,951
I don't know, as a
souvenir, or a trophy?
314
00:13:32,956 --> 00:13:35,324
Or something worse.
315
00:13:40,130 --> 00:13:41,760
Mmm,
316
00:13:41,765 --> 00:13:45,030
I can feel the facts and numbers.
317
00:13:45,035 --> 00:13:47,365
Mmm...
318
00:13:47,370 --> 00:13:49,568
That the last brain, then?
319
00:13:49,573 --> 00:13:51,470
Not by a shot long.
320
00:13:51,475 --> 00:13:52,775
Long shot.
321
00:13:54,444 --> 00:13:56,408
Is that the thing?
322
00:13:56,413 --> 00:13:58,443
Not by a long shot.
323
00:13:58,448 --> 00:14:00,779
We're gonna need more brains.
324
00:14:00,784 --> 00:14:02,384
A lot more brains.
325
00:14:03,620 --> 00:14:06,822
(COUGHING)
326
00:14:09,793 --> 00:14:11,523
It's okay, I'm okay.
327
00:14:11,528 --> 00:14:14,693
Don't worry. Don't worry. (SIGHING)
328
00:14:14,698 --> 00:14:17,366
Yeah, I wasn't.
329
00:14:22,896 --> 00:14:24,159
Okay, murderinos,
330
00:14:24,164 --> 00:14:26,528
tell me about my least
favourite murderer.
331
00:14:26,533 --> 00:14:29,072
(JEREMY): Okay, well,
the unsub is a male,
332
00:14:29,077 --> 00:14:30,474
mid-thirties, early forties.
333
00:14:30,479 --> 00:14:31,679
(WAVERLY): Strong, because
334
00:14:31,684 --> 00:14:34,248
the victims don't have
many defence wounds.
335
00:14:34,253 --> 00:14:36,621
He seems to have
incapacitated them easily.
336
00:14:37,586 --> 00:14:39,416
We're sure it's not a sexy vampire?
337
00:14:39,421 --> 00:14:41,651
- Can confirm.
- Right.
338
00:14:41,656 --> 00:14:43,381
The thing is, the murders
aren't the goal.
339
00:14:43,386 --> 00:14:45,589
The brains are actually
what the demon's after.
340
00:14:45,594 --> 00:14:47,123
But...
341
00:14:47,128 --> 00:14:49,826
the weapon that caused
these puncture marks
342
00:14:49,831 --> 00:14:51,294
might be painted.
343
00:14:51,299 --> 00:14:53,497
Yeah, there's a turquoise
smudging left behind,
344
00:14:53,502 --> 00:14:55,599
which isn't very demonic.
345
00:14:55,604 --> 00:14:58,835
Yeah, but the demon got the brains out
346
00:14:58,840 --> 00:15:00,704
without a trace of a wound, so...
347
00:15:00,709 --> 00:15:02,439
Baby girl. It's a demon.
348
00:15:02,444 --> 00:15:03,807
What kind of human wants brains?
349
00:15:03,812 --> 00:15:06,042
Yeah. Thank you, Wynonna.
350
00:15:06,047 --> 00:15:09,978
(SCOFFING): Maybe a human with a fetish.
351
00:15:09,983 --> 00:15:13,683
Or a compulsive obsession
with intelligence.
352
00:15:13,688 --> 00:15:15,288
Like a lot of killers,
353
00:15:15,293 --> 00:15:18,555
he's probably frustrated
at the way he's seen.
354
00:15:18,560 --> 00:15:20,590
In this case, with being seen as smart.
355
00:15:20,595 --> 00:15:22,359
Yeah, like you. Right now.
356
00:15:22,364 --> 00:15:24,594
Save it for trivia, downward don't.
357
00:15:24,599 --> 00:15:26,830
You save it for trivia, online degree.
358
00:15:26,835 --> 00:15:29,032
(WAVERLY AND WYNONNA GASP)
359
00:15:29,037 --> 00:15:32,135
I am going to crush you!
360
00:15:32,140 --> 00:15:35,705
Okay. Alright, so,
see, see, what I think,
361
00:15:35,710 --> 00:15:38,008
as a smart also,
362
00:15:38,013 --> 00:15:39,976
my hunch about this guy is, uh,
363
00:15:39,981 --> 00:15:42,712
he's a mur... derer. Okay?
364
00:15:42,717 --> 00:15:46,583
So, so he's like a murder,
he's a murder fan.
365
00:15:46,588 --> 00:15:48,455
- Who likes to...
- (QUACKING)
366
00:15:49,691 --> 00:15:51,087
I left my rubber ducky keychain
367
00:15:51,092 --> 00:15:52,927
- at the sheriff's office.
- (QUACKING)
368
00:15:53,595 --> 00:15:55,559
With a sign that says,
369
00:15:55,564 --> 00:15:57,598
"If you have an emergency, quack it".
370
00:15:59,801 --> 00:16:03,366
Lemme guess. Your neighbour
wore white after labour day.
371
00:16:03,371 --> 00:16:05,306
- No. This is serious.
- Oh.
372
00:16:06,308 --> 00:16:07,771
Then what is it?
373
00:16:07,776 --> 00:16:09,706
So, there's this couple,
a guy and a girl.
374
00:16:09,711 --> 00:16:11,041
They were fighting.
375
00:16:11,046 --> 00:16:14,210
- Did he hit her?
- No, but, I'm sure he has.
376
00:16:14,215 --> 00:16:16,513
He just kept yelling at
her that he owned her.
377
00:16:16,518 --> 00:16:18,548
Like, "I own you, I own you!"
378
00:16:18,553 --> 00:16:20,053
And then, he threw her into his car.
379
00:16:20,058 --> 00:16:22,253
- God, that sounds awful.
- Well, yeah, it was.
380
00:16:22,257 --> 00:16:24,992
Abusive relationship
trumps brain man. Let's go.
381
00:16:25,994 --> 00:16:27,625
- Where was it?
- Oh well, they drove off.
382
00:16:27,629 --> 00:16:28,992
- Did you get a plate?
- No,
383
00:16:28,997 --> 00:16:31,695
but he had, he had flames
painted on the front of his car.
384
00:16:31,700 --> 00:16:32,896
Like really lame.
385
00:16:32,901 --> 00:16:35,126
Nosy neighbours finally pay off.
386
00:16:35,131 --> 00:16:36,832
- I've got the address here.
- (WAVERLY): Okay.
387
00:16:36,836 --> 00:16:38,368
Alright, let's go.
388
00:16:38,373 --> 00:16:39,936
- Hey...
- (DOOR OPENS)
389
00:16:39,941 --> 00:16:41,605
That's not all.
390
00:16:41,610 --> 00:16:42,610
What is it?
391
00:16:42,615 --> 00:16:44,474
I tried to break the fight up.
392
00:16:44,479 --> 00:16:45,809
Told the guy to cool off.
393
00:16:45,814 --> 00:16:47,110
Did he attack you?
394
00:16:47,115 --> 00:16:48,445
Oh, worse.
395
00:16:48,450 --> 00:16:50,547
While he was dragging
the girl to the car,
396
00:16:50,552 --> 00:16:52,119
he turned to me and he said,
397
00:16:53,288 --> 00:16:54,955
"I wish you would eat shit".
398
00:16:55,924 --> 00:16:57,654
Yeah, yeah that's weird phrasing.
399
00:16:57,658 --> 00:16:58,658
Yeah.
400
00:16:59,527 --> 00:17:00,761
And then I went and ate shit.
401
00:17:01,963 --> 00:17:03,130
I don't even like shit.
402
00:17:10,305 --> 00:17:12,769
Well, we know he has a small dick.
403
00:17:12,774 --> 00:17:14,441
I probably dated him.
404
00:17:18,480 --> 00:17:20,276
Open up, it's the...
405
00:17:20,281 --> 00:17:21,478
Earp Sisters!
406
00:17:21,483 --> 00:17:22,883
(CHUCKLING IN THE HOUSE)
407
00:17:27,188 --> 00:17:28,388
Uh, hi?
408
00:17:29,049 --> 00:17:30,049
Something funny?
409
00:17:30,054 --> 00:17:31,885
Yeah, I was...
410
00:17:31,890 --> 00:17:34,591
thinking about something
funny I saw on the internet.
411
00:17:34,596 --> 00:17:36,693
There's a guy, said
something funny and then...
412
00:17:36,698 --> 00:17:38,698
his friend said something
funny back to him.
413
00:17:38,703 --> 00:17:40,237
Yeah, I think I saw that one.
414
00:17:42,537 --> 00:17:44,338
Doug? Doug Warner?
415
00:17:45,774 --> 00:17:47,808
Used to be my name.
416
00:17:48,506 --> 00:17:49,506
Used to?
417
00:17:49,511 --> 00:17:51,041
Mmm... (CLEARING THROAT)
418
00:17:51,046 --> 00:17:52,046
We're coming in.
419
00:17:52,051 --> 00:17:54,018
(STAMMERING): Your wish is my command.
420
00:17:57,719 --> 00:17:58,819
Any hail today?
421
00:17:59,721 --> 00:18:02,318
Uh, no.
422
00:18:02,323 --> 00:18:03,887
Hail is not ice pellets.
423
00:18:03,892 --> 00:18:04,922
A lot of people confuse them
424
00:18:04,926 --> 00:18:06,761
but it's actually
different precipitations.
425
00:18:08,163 --> 00:18:09,726
Just the kind of stuff you pick up.
426
00:18:09,731 --> 00:18:11,027
(SNAPPING HIS FINGERS)
427
00:18:11,032 --> 00:18:12,466
Weather facts.
428
00:18:13,568 --> 00:18:14,698
Neat.
429
00:18:14,703 --> 00:18:16,332
Yeah, I got a lot of 'em.
430
00:18:16,337 --> 00:18:17,905
Don't get me started on sleet.
431
00:18:18,672 --> 00:18:20,171
You know, sleet actually goes east west.
432
00:18:20,175 --> 00:18:21,738
You know how rain is up down?
433
00:18:21,743 --> 00:18:24,274
Sleet is actually all dependent
on the jet stream.
434
00:18:24,279 --> 00:18:27,110
It's a big stream of wind
that flies through the...
435
00:18:27,115 --> 00:18:30,113
it's just a scam perpetrated
by the post office, actually.
436
00:18:30,118 --> 00:18:31,385
(SOFTLY): Hey.
437
00:18:32,220 --> 00:18:33,954
Are you doing okay?
438
00:18:35,323 --> 00:18:37,153
Just battling the trolls.
439
00:18:37,158 --> 00:18:39,355
- (CHUCKLING)
- Listen.
440
00:18:39,360 --> 00:18:41,491
We're here to help.
441
00:18:41,496 --> 00:18:42,726
We can get you out.
442
00:18:42,731 --> 00:18:45,800
Yeah, no you can't, but... no big.
443
00:18:49,904 --> 00:18:52,369
What're you eating there?
What kind of sandwich is that?
444
00:18:52,373 --> 00:18:53,636
Brain.
445
00:18:53,641 --> 00:18:54,742
Cow.
446
00:18:55,677 --> 00:18:56,910
Girl meat sandwich.
447
00:18:58,246 --> 00:19:00,343
All cows are girls.
448
00:19:00,348 --> 00:19:03,113
- Boy cows are bulls.
- I too graduated kindergarten.
449
00:19:03,118 --> 00:19:04,547
(BANGING ON TABLE)
450
00:19:04,552 --> 00:19:05,749
You think I'm dumb?
451
00:19:05,754 --> 00:19:07,483
I think you have brain on your chin.
452
00:19:07,488 --> 00:19:09,753
I do? Did I get it?
453
00:19:09,758 --> 00:19:11,187
I used to be dumb,
454
00:19:11,192 --> 00:19:13,160
but I'm actually getting a lot smarter.
455
00:19:14,496 --> 00:19:16,092
Would you say you have a...
456
00:19:16,097 --> 00:19:19,696
compulsive obsession with intelligence?
457
00:19:19,701 --> 00:19:20,730
Ginny get in here!
458
00:19:20,735 --> 00:19:22,133
Leave her the fuck alone, Doug.
459
00:19:22,137 --> 00:19:25,235
It's not Doug.
460
00:19:25,240 --> 00:19:27,737
My name is Kuru!
461
00:19:27,742 --> 00:19:31,141
- (SNORTING): Honestly this guy.
- (KURU): Ginny! Get here!
462
00:19:31,146 --> 00:19:32,909
(WYNONNA): Waverly!
He's our demon killer!
463
00:19:32,914 --> 00:19:34,677
You, you don't have to do this, Ginny.
464
00:19:34,682 --> 00:19:35,845
'Scuse me.
465
00:19:35,850 --> 00:19:38,148
Peacemaker's not glowing!
So he's kinda just a dude!
466
00:19:38,153 --> 00:19:40,884
- Human.
- I am the demon Kuru.
467
00:19:40,889 --> 00:19:42,289
- He's a human.
- (KURU): Ginny.
468
00:19:43,925 --> 00:19:45,822
No. She's not yours, buddy.
469
00:19:45,827 --> 00:19:47,957
Just lemme go to him.
470
00:19:47,962 --> 00:19:49,759
- Sweetheart, it's okay.
- What?
471
00:19:49,764 --> 00:19:51,365
(WAVERLY WHISPERING)
472
00:19:53,001 --> 00:19:54,297
(SCREAMING)
473
00:19:54,302 --> 00:19:56,499
You did not just throw brain at me!
474
00:19:56,504 --> 00:19:58,301
- Argh!
- I wish her to die.
475
00:19:58,306 --> 00:20:00,106
I wish her to die. I wish her to die.
476
00:20:00,111 --> 00:20:02,472
Then come to me. Take my hand.
477
00:20:02,477 --> 00:20:05,909
Ow! Watch the nails, girl. Ow!
478
00:20:05,914 --> 00:20:08,448
Why... Oh, come on!
479
00:20:10,451 --> 00:20:11,614
(WAVERLY): Shit!
480
00:20:11,619 --> 00:20:13,450
No way he jumped that fence.
481
00:20:13,455 --> 00:20:15,185
Hey.
482
00:20:15,190 --> 00:20:17,725
Listen. We're gonna get
you somewhere safe, okay?
483
00:20:18,827 --> 00:20:22,959
Well, I'm gonna go wash this
brain off my shirt, but...
484
00:20:22,964 --> 00:20:25,034
- Wynonna will.
- (GINNY): Cool...
485
00:20:25,039 --> 00:20:27,808
Can't wait to be exactly back
here in a couple hours.
486
00:20:33,208 --> 00:20:34,775
(CLICKING)
487
00:20:36,077 --> 00:20:38,374
(WYNONNA): Listen, we wanna help you.
488
00:20:38,379 --> 00:20:41,110
I've seen this before,
you're the victim.
489
00:20:41,115 --> 00:20:42,115
(SIGHING)
490
00:20:42,120 --> 00:20:44,618
Can you just put the phone down a sec?
491
00:20:44,623 --> 00:20:46,924
- Nah, I'm good.
- Okay. I get it.
492
00:20:49,991 --> 00:20:51,825
I get it. I look like a cop.
493
00:20:52,527 --> 00:20:54,224
Well, I'm not.
494
00:20:54,229 --> 00:20:58,127
I've spent several New Year's
Eveses in drunk tanks.
495
00:20:58,132 --> 00:20:59,462
You're safe with me.
496
00:20:59,467 --> 00:21:02,766
- (WHOOSHING)
- (GINNY): Oh shit.
497
00:21:02,771 --> 00:21:04,701
- That's the gun that kills us!
- You're her?
498
00:21:04,705 --> 00:21:08,004
- Damn right. Hands up.
- Girl, it's chill.
499
00:21:08,009 --> 00:21:10,640
- Okay, I'm chill.
- It's you.
500
00:21:10,645 --> 00:21:11,908
You did it, didn't you?
501
00:21:11,913 --> 00:21:14,581
Yes, but it's not me, it's his wishes!
502
00:21:15,483 --> 00:21:16,550
Wishes?
503
00:21:17,619 --> 00:21:19,415
I'm a genie.
504
00:21:19,420 --> 00:21:22,085
Kuru's wish is my command.
505
00:21:22,090 --> 00:21:24,258
And his wishes are fucking nuts.
506
00:21:29,500 --> 00:21:31,430
Okay. A genie?
507
00:21:31,435 --> 00:21:33,399
Did Doug find a lamp or something?
508
00:21:33,404 --> 00:21:36,004
One flamboyant genie lives in a lamp,
509
00:21:36,009 --> 00:21:38,404
now suddenly we all live in lamps. Ugh.
510
00:21:38,409 --> 00:21:41,473
Well, what about a trophy?
We dusted a Marzaniok once.
511
00:21:41,478 --> 00:21:42,808
That's cute.
512
00:21:42,813 --> 00:21:45,176
No, I just needed a new master.
513
00:21:45,181 --> 00:21:47,411
Master? Honey, no.
514
00:21:47,416 --> 00:21:50,416
Doug bumped into me at
the bar, and that was it.
515
00:21:50,421 --> 00:21:52,618
That's how it works.
516
00:21:52,623 --> 00:21:54,186
And now he calls the shots.
517
00:21:54,191 --> 00:21:56,288
Not so fast.
518
00:21:56,293 --> 00:21:57,960
- Show her what you got.
- Oh, yeah.
519
00:21:59,560 --> 00:22:01,060
Your nails.
520
00:22:01,065 --> 00:22:04,663
Same colour as the wounds
found on the murder victims.
521
00:22:04,668 --> 00:22:06,265
- Your nails poison them.
- Yeah.
522
00:22:06,270 --> 00:22:07,866
But only cause he wished them to.
523
00:22:07,871 --> 00:22:09,202
Why does he want you to kill them?
524
00:22:09,206 --> 00:22:10,705
He wants to be the smartest guy in town
525
00:22:10,709 --> 00:22:13,172
so he makes me kill all
the smartest people in town.
526
00:22:13,177 --> 00:22:16,942
- I mean, usually keepers...
- Keepers?
527
00:22:16,947 --> 00:22:18,177
You need to stop.
528
00:22:18,182 --> 00:22:19,812
Okay, well, usually they're all like,
529
00:22:19,817 --> 00:22:24,717
"I want guns for hands", or
like a laser dick, but not Doug.
530
00:22:24,722 --> 00:22:27,152
Why doesn't he just wish to
be the smartest guy in town?
531
00:22:27,157 --> 00:22:29,388
Because he's not smart.
532
00:22:29,393 --> 00:22:31,924
(JEREMY): Okay, look.
He's already killed twice.
533
00:22:31,929 --> 00:22:33,592
Three wishes. That's all you get.
534
00:22:33,597 --> 00:22:35,327
Dude wished for infinite wishes.
535
00:22:35,332 --> 00:22:36,866
Isn't that against genie rules?
536
00:22:37,501 --> 00:22:40,165
No. And don't be superstitious.
537
00:22:40,170 --> 00:22:42,701
Look. He has infinite wishes,
538
00:22:42,706 --> 00:22:44,603
so no matter what we talk about here,
539
00:22:44,608 --> 00:22:46,608
I'm still bound to keep
makin' them all come true.
540
00:22:46,613 --> 00:22:50,109
Except... you won't.
541
00:22:50,114 --> 00:22:51,877
Because...
542
00:22:51,882 --> 00:22:55,314
when you say he bumped into you
at the bar and became your...
543
00:22:55,319 --> 00:22:56,882
Lord?
544
00:22:56,887 --> 00:22:58,550
Yeah. None of the words you're using
545
00:22:58,555 --> 00:23:00,590
are working for me, okay?
546
00:23:01,659 --> 00:23:03,426
You meant literally bumped into you.
547
00:23:03,894 --> 00:23:05,058
'Cause when you were at the house,
548
00:23:05,062 --> 00:23:06,356
you kept reaching for each other.
549
00:23:06,360 --> 00:23:07,960
He needs to be touching you
550
00:23:07,965 --> 00:23:09,628
for his wish to come true.
551
00:23:09,633 --> 00:23:10,733
Pretty much.
552
00:23:11,335 --> 00:23:12,535
Okay, totally much.
553
00:23:13,671 --> 00:23:14,937
- Nice.
- Thanks.
554
00:23:15,503 --> 00:23:17,603
And I'm not leaving your side.
555
00:23:17,608 --> 00:23:20,673
Okay, well, I hope it
works, but he is my...
556
00:23:20,678 --> 00:23:23,578
- Don't say it!
- He's mine, I'm his. Forever.
557
00:23:23,583 --> 00:23:25,911
- Did he wish to be immortal?
- No. I can't do that.
558
00:23:25,916 --> 00:23:28,247
Or bring back people from the dead.
559
00:23:28,252 --> 00:23:30,016
Can you at least pretend
you watched Aladdin?
560
00:23:30,020 --> 00:23:32,217
- (LIP SMACKING, SCOFFING)
- I'm stuck with brain-eater
561
00:23:32,222 --> 00:23:34,553
- till he croaks.
- Uh. Which reminds me,
562
00:23:34,558 --> 00:23:36,278
Wynonna, I need to show you something.
563
00:23:39,596 --> 00:23:43,766
Okay. Solid convo, but can
I get my phone back now?
564
00:23:45,769 --> 00:23:48,271
I need to see if my tweet's
doing numbers.
565
00:23:49,873 --> 00:23:51,570
Are you gonna make me watch Aladdin?
566
00:23:51,575 --> 00:23:54,073
I-I was researching obscure
diseases for trivia night
567
00:23:54,078 --> 00:23:55,507
when I came across "Kuru",
568
00:23:55,512 --> 00:23:57,109
the name that Doug wants to be called.
569
00:23:57,114 --> 00:23:59,178
It's a condition that some cannibals get
570
00:23:59,183 --> 00:24:00,379
when they eat human brains.
571
00:24:00,384 --> 00:24:03,318
- Like Mad Cow Disease?
- Yes, exactly.
572
00:24:03,323 --> 00:24:05,817
I think that Doug ate human brain,
573
00:24:05,822 --> 00:24:07,286
got sick, googled it,
574
00:24:07,291 --> 00:24:09,621
and started calling himself
by the name of that sickness.
575
00:24:09,626 --> 00:24:12,191
Okay. Well, he's not
exactly the best of us.
576
00:24:12,196 --> 00:24:14,027
Which is why I'm not leaving
here till he's caught.
577
00:24:14,031 --> 00:24:15,794
Yes! Great idea. You stay here.
578
00:24:15,799 --> 00:24:18,230
- I go to trivia night.
- No, Jeremy!
579
00:24:18,235 --> 00:24:19,531
We need to find a killer.
580
00:24:19,536 --> 00:24:20,667
There will be other trivia nights.
581
00:24:20,671 --> 00:24:23,373
No, no, no! Tonight is
the finals! It's critical.
582
00:24:24,975 --> 00:24:26,375
Jeremy.
583
00:24:27,811 --> 00:24:29,908
It's your beautiful brain.
584
00:24:29,913 --> 00:24:30,913
What?
585
00:24:31,582 --> 00:24:33,282
Trivia night!
586
00:24:34,618 --> 00:24:37,249
Ginny said he wants to
find the smartest people
587
00:24:37,254 --> 00:24:39,618
so he can eat their brains!
588
00:24:39,623 --> 00:24:40,953
Your brain!
589
00:24:40,958 --> 00:24:42,621
- That's nuts.
- It is,
590
00:24:42,626 --> 00:24:44,922
because random trivia's obviously not
591
00:24:44,927 --> 00:24:46,605
an accurate way to judge intelligence
592
00:24:46,610 --> 00:24:47,793
otherwise I'd still be in it.
593
00:24:47,798 --> 00:24:50,195
- Well...
- 100% coo-coo for Kuru Puffs!
594
00:24:50,200 --> 00:24:53,232
Okay, okay. So that is
why we're all so obsessed.
595
00:24:53,237 --> 00:24:55,267
Yes. And why I'm not. Anymore.
596
00:24:55,272 --> 00:24:56,835
It has nothing to do with you losing?
597
00:24:56,840 --> 00:24:59,238
No. It's the wish.
598
00:24:59,243 --> 00:25:01,607
Okay. Yeah, no. That-that makes sense
599
00:25:01,612 --> 00:25:04,476
in a that-makes-no-sense kinda way.
600
00:25:04,481 --> 00:25:07,212
Great, okay, if you are
good to guard the genie,
601
00:25:07,217 --> 00:25:10,149
then me, Waverly, Nicole and
Doc can go to trivia night
602
00:25:10,154 --> 00:25:11,650
- and take Kuru-Doug down.
- Cool.
603
00:25:11,655 --> 00:25:12,785
It shouldn't be hard.
604
00:25:12,790 --> 00:25:14,921
Without his genie he'll just
be a normal numpty. Okay.
605
00:25:14,925 --> 00:25:17,322
I'm gonna call Waverly
and tell her the plan.
606
00:25:17,327 --> 00:25:18,357
You call Doc.
607
00:25:18,362 --> 00:25:19,925
Okay.
608
00:25:19,930 --> 00:25:21,527
Okay, so it's a wish.
609
00:25:21,532 --> 00:25:24,000
And the guy will be at trivia
and then we'll do a takedown?
610
00:25:24,501 --> 00:25:26,732
The way you say "takedown"...
611
00:25:26,737 --> 00:25:29,868
I can feel your sheriff senses tingling.
612
00:25:29,873 --> 00:25:32,404
- You loved your job.
- Well, now I love trivia.
613
00:25:32,409 --> 00:25:33,539
And you.
614
00:25:33,544 --> 00:25:34,944
In that order.
615
00:25:36,180 --> 00:25:38,380
God, what an awful wish!
616
00:25:38,385 --> 00:25:39,885
Don't change the subject.
617
00:25:39,890 --> 00:25:42,581
Hey, maybe you should
try club soda on your...
618
00:25:42,586 --> 00:25:44,353
(BREATHING HEAVILY)
619
00:25:45,823 --> 00:25:46,985
Hey.
620
00:25:46,990 --> 00:25:48,558
(SIGHING)
621
00:25:49,092 --> 00:25:50,989
I'd lost everything.
622
00:25:50,994 --> 00:25:53,229
The woman I love, my friends.
623
00:25:54,565 --> 00:25:56,695
Then I lost the election.
624
00:25:56,700 --> 00:25:57,867
To Holt.
625
00:25:59,203 --> 00:26:03,135
It was the last straw,
so I did something.
626
00:26:03,140 --> 00:26:05,208
Is this a froggy thing again?
627
00:26:06,877 --> 00:26:09,412
Now everybody in Purgatory hates me.
628
00:26:10,380 --> 00:26:11,810
So?
629
00:26:11,815 --> 00:26:15,051
Everyone hates Wynonna,
and she still Wynonnas.
630
00:26:16,053 --> 00:26:18,054
- I'm sure it's fine.
- It's not.
631
00:26:20,157 --> 00:26:21,257
Look.
632
00:26:22,459 --> 00:26:24,060
Brain stain aside,
633
00:26:25,429 --> 00:26:27,597
we're so close to being happy.
634
00:26:28,765 --> 00:26:31,434
I never want you to blunt your ambition.
635
00:26:33,437 --> 00:26:36,906
It's one of the things
that makes you... you.
636
00:26:39,409 --> 00:26:41,373
I got you back.
637
00:26:41,378 --> 00:26:43,012
That's my happy.
638
00:26:53,457 --> 00:26:54,991
He's gonna come get me.
639
00:26:56,560 --> 00:26:57,923
Maybe you should just relax.
640
00:26:57,928 --> 00:26:59,958
Genies don't relax.
641
00:26:59,963 --> 00:27:02,394
Okay? I'd have to have my own
needs and desires for that,
642
00:27:02,399 --> 00:27:05,430
rather than just fulfill wishes.
643
00:27:05,435 --> 00:27:07,132
You killed people.
644
00:27:07,137 --> 00:27:08,700
Doug killed people.
645
00:27:08,705 --> 00:27:11,672
- I did my job.
- Right.
646
00:27:11,677 --> 00:27:14,642
Genies don't kill people.
People with genies kill people.
647
00:27:14,647 --> 00:27:15,976
Facts.
648
00:27:15,981 --> 00:27:17,849
Well, maybe don't pick
an asshole next time.
649
00:27:21,017 --> 00:27:23,018
You saying I have bad taste in men?
650
00:27:24,855 --> 00:27:26,985
I get the bad boy thing. (CHUCKLING)
651
00:27:26,990 --> 00:27:28,620
Doug?
652
00:27:28,625 --> 00:27:31,690
- Ew. No, he's just my...
- Bah!
653
00:27:31,695 --> 00:27:34,826
Uh... he's my "wish-getting guy".
654
00:27:34,831 --> 00:27:37,333
- Thank you.
- It's not romantic.
655
00:27:38,869 --> 00:27:43,869
Even when they are cute,
they're all Kuru in the end.
656
00:27:43,874 --> 00:27:45,341
I'd retweet that.
657
00:27:47,644 --> 00:27:49,042
(RACHEL): What's the
capital of Tanzania?
658
00:27:49,046 --> 00:27:50,546
(JEREMY): Ah! Dodoma!
659
00:27:53,129 --> 00:27:54,926
I could help with those butterflies
660
00:27:54,931 --> 00:27:57,582
- if you just told me.
- Never.
661
00:27:57,587 --> 00:28:00,352
Oh, my God, why am I
here, why am I here?
662
00:28:00,357 --> 00:28:01,920
Why am I...
663
00:28:01,925 --> 00:28:04,756
You're here because we want to decide
664
00:28:04,761 --> 00:28:07,092
who has Purgatory's tastiest brain.
665
00:28:07,097 --> 00:28:08,460
Right, yeah.
666
00:28:08,465 --> 00:28:09,761
And so does the killer.
667
00:28:09,766 --> 00:28:13,469
And when he comes, we'll take him down.
668
00:28:15,105 --> 00:28:18,603
Wow. Chicken-kicker shows her face.
669
00:28:18,608 --> 00:28:19,938
What did you just call her?
670
00:28:19,943 --> 00:28:22,107
(CLUCKING)
671
00:28:22,112 --> 00:28:24,880
(ALL CLUCKING)
672
00:28:26,850 --> 00:28:28,884
Alright, settle down.
673
00:28:29,686 --> 00:28:30,949
Come on.
674
00:28:30,954 --> 00:28:32,718
Start your brain engines, folks.
675
00:28:32,723 --> 00:28:33,819
Take your seats.
676
00:28:33,824 --> 00:28:36,188
Nope. I am taking no seats.
677
00:28:36,193 --> 00:28:37,522
Nicole! Wait!
678
00:28:37,527 --> 00:28:41,197
I mean... I can't go
with you, but I love you!
679
00:28:43,166 --> 00:28:44,767
(JEREMY EXHALES)
680
00:28:46,269 --> 00:28:48,033
(WHOOSHING)
681
00:28:48,038 --> 00:28:49,067
Ow!
682
00:28:49,072 --> 00:28:51,167
Argh! Great. Kuru's wish
683
00:28:51,172 --> 00:28:53,772
means I literally can't
leave trivia night.
684
00:28:53,777 --> 00:28:55,444
You've got to be kidding me.
685
00:28:58,482 --> 00:29:00,379
At least there's no Reaper anymore.
686
00:29:00,384 --> 00:29:02,080
(NEDLEY): Alright folks!
687
00:29:02,085 --> 00:29:05,150
Now, seeing as how this is sudden death,
688
00:29:05,155 --> 00:29:07,249
you buzz in with one wrong answer
689
00:29:07,254 --> 00:29:09,154
and that's all she wrote
for you, you're done.
690
00:29:09,159 --> 00:29:10,922
You dig?
691
00:29:10,927 --> 00:29:12,657
Finalists?
692
00:29:12,662 --> 00:29:14,493
You made it to the end?
693
00:29:14,498 --> 00:29:16,695
- Oh, I don't sleep, Earp.
- Okay, remember guys,
694
00:29:16,700 --> 00:29:18,063
we're here to catch a killer.
695
00:29:18,068 --> 00:29:20,599
After I best you at Pop Culture 101.
696
00:29:20,604 --> 00:29:22,200
As if, Oldie Hawn.
697
00:29:22,205 --> 00:29:24,069
Also, I love you.
698
00:29:24,074 --> 00:29:25,904
(NEDLEY): Question number one.
699
00:29:25,909 --> 00:29:27,539
This famous songstress
700
00:29:27,544 --> 00:29:29,939
is the youngest of 14 siblings.
701
00:29:29,944 --> 00:29:32,044
- (DINGING)
- (ALL THREE): Celine!
702
00:29:32,049 --> 00:29:33,311
(JEREMY GROANING)
703
00:29:33,316 --> 00:29:34,881
Looks like we got a fun
night ahead of us.
704
00:29:34,885 --> 00:29:36,448
That one's a draw. Question number two.
705
00:29:36,453 --> 00:29:37,849
- (DING)
- Turkmenistan!
706
00:29:37,854 --> 00:29:39,284
- (DING)
- F�r Elise!
707
00:29:39,289 --> 00:29:42,521
- (DING)
- Kristy Yamaguchi!
708
00:29:42,526 --> 00:29:44,720
Correct. Next question.
709
00:29:44,725 --> 00:29:46,525
Ah! The archangel Gabriel.
710
00:29:46,530 --> 00:29:48,293
Gah! That should've been mine!
711
00:29:48,298 --> 00:29:51,797
I'm the... one who read Paradise Lost.
712
00:29:51,802 --> 00:29:53,498
- Next question.
- Dunkeroos!
713
00:29:53,503 --> 00:29:54,900
Quaaludes!
714
00:29:54,905 --> 00:29:56,134
Armie Hammer.
715
00:29:56,139 --> 00:29:57,139
Correct.
716
00:29:57,144 --> 00:29:58,367
Ooh! The planet Ork!
717
00:29:58,372 --> 00:30:00,272
The Republic of Djibouti!
718
00:30:00,277 --> 00:30:03,742
Justin, Joey, Chris, JC and Lance.
719
00:30:03,747 --> 00:30:07,479
(CHUCKLING): Correct.
720
00:30:07,484 --> 00:30:08,880
- Boron!
- No!
721
00:30:08,885 --> 00:30:10,449
I'm the science guy!
722
00:30:10,454 --> 00:30:12,284
Jack Ruby.
723
00:30:12,289 --> 00:30:14,119
Oswald, he was a patsy.
724
00:30:14,124 --> 00:30:15,320
You are correct.
725
00:30:15,325 --> 00:30:16,325
(DINGING)
726
00:30:16,330 --> 00:30:17,823
- Correct.
- (DINGING)
727
00:30:17,828 --> 00:30:19,558
- Correct. Correct.
- (DING)
728
00:30:19,563 --> 00:30:20,625
Correct.
729
00:30:20,630 --> 00:30:22,294
- Correct.
- Yes!
730
00:30:22,299 --> 00:30:23,628
(JEREMY SIGHS)
731
00:30:23,633 --> 00:30:25,830
Okay, here's one for the cowboys.
732
00:30:25,835 --> 00:30:27,799
Now known as the "dead man's hand",
733
00:30:27,804 --> 00:30:31,132
what combination of cards
was Wild Bill Hickock holding
734
00:30:31,137 --> 00:30:32,637
- when he was shot in the back?
- Ugh!
735
00:30:32,642 --> 00:30:34,639
- (DING)
- Mr. Holliday.
736
00:30:34,644 --> 00:30:36,675
William had himself a deuce and a seven,
737
00:30:36,680 --> 00:30:39,211
which is a death unto itself.
738
00:30:39,216 --> 00:30:41,177
Dead man's hand is a
pair of aces and eights.
739
00:30:41,182 --> 00:30:43,682
Uh, yeah, that is not what he had.
740
00:30:43,687 --> 00:30:46,017
- I was there.
- (JEREMY SCOFFS)
741
00:30:46,022 --> 00:30:47,652
Did he just say he was there?
742
00:30:47,657 --> 00:30:50,426
Yeah, wow, you really
need another mint, Bradley.
743
00:30:51,862 --> 00:30:53,458
Sorry Doc, but you're out.
744
00:30:53,463 --> 00:30:55,260
This is an outrage,
745
00:30:55,265 --> 00:30:57,262
I must remain in this
battle and prove that
746
00:30:57,267 --> 00:30:59,468
it is I that has the ideal brain.
747
00:31:00,470 --> 00:31:02,767
Wait. Why is it still just us?
748
00:31:02,772 --> 00:31:04,466
Where is the man that
calls himself Kuru?
749
00:31:04,471 --> 00:31:06,771
Boo! Down in front!
750
00:31:06,776 --> 00:31:08,807
- Boo!
- Move it along.
751
00:31:08,812 --> 00:31:10,108
You're still my favourite, boo.
752
00:31:10,113 --> 00:31:13,712
Okay, wait. So, now, he's
the vampire demon leader?
753
00:31:13,717 --> 00:31:15,547
I know, it's messed up.
754
00:31:15,552 --> 00:31:17,182
(CHUCKLING)
755
00:31:17,187 --> 00:31:20,385
Well, I can tell you, love messed up.
756
00:31:20,390 --> 00:31:22,287
At least I know my keeper.
757
00:31:22,292 --> 00:31:25,123
- Hey. Stop saying that word!
- Why?
758
00:31:25,128 --> 00:31:27,025
Because it's got horrible connotations.
759
00:31:27,030 --> 00:31:29,694
That's the reality for some of us.
760
00:31:29,699 --> 00:31:31,396
Both of us.
761
00:31:31,401 --> 00:31:33,465
I still have the gun that can kill you.
762
00:31:33,470 --> 00:31:36,735
Or does it have you, honey? (CHUCKLING)
763
00:31:36,740 --> 00:31:38,770
(RINGTONE, GINNY GASPS)
764
00:31:38,775 --> 00:31:44,910
Okay, please. Can I just quickly
just peek at my notifications?
765
00:31:44,915 --> 00:31:46,149
Please?
766
00:31:46,154 --> 00:31:47,679
Please.
767
00:31:47,684 --> 00:31:50,615
Just don't text Doug.
768
00:31:50,620 --> 00:31:52,217
Ghost him till he dies.
769
00:31:52,222 --> 00:31:53,422
I'm worse than a ghost.
770
00:31:54,057 --> 00:31:56,221
Ugh. (GINNY SIGHS)
771
00:31:56,226 --> 00:31:59,725
Ugh... he wished he
could walk through walls.
772
00:31:59,730 --> 00:32:01,793
I wish Wynonna would open the cell.
773
00:32:01,798 --> 00:32:04,066
(WHOOSHING, WYNONNA MOANS)
774
00:32:07,737 --> 00:32:10,402
(CLANGING)
775
00:32:10,407 --> 00:32:11,974
Why aren't you at trivia night?
776
00:32:13,109 --> 00:32:15,874
Back at the house, I realized...
777
00:32:15,879 --> 00:32:17,112
street brains.
778
00:32:18,348 --> 00:32:19,949
You mean street smarts?
779
00:32:21,117 --> 00:32:22,714
(SNORTING)
780
00:32:22,719 --> 00:32:26,422
Street brains are brains
that I want too.
781
00:32:27,591 --> 00:32:31,193
That's what you have. So, you.
782
00:32:32,729 --> 00:32:34,659
Ugh.
783
00:32:34,664 --> 00:32:37,032
I wish for her to say
bye-bye to her brain.
784
00:32:37,901 --> 00:32:39,368
(WHOOSHING)
785
00:32:40,971 --> 00:32:42,569
Bye-bye, brain.
786
00:32:45,892 --> 00:32:47,955
We must leave. The killer's not here
787
00:32:47,960 --> 00:32:49,361
which means he's heading for his genie,
788
00:32:49,365 --> 00:32:50,565
putting Wynonna in danger.
789
00:32:50,570 --> 00:32:52,370
Yes, okay, yeah, you're right.
You're right!
790
00:32:52,375 --> 00:32:53,807
- Yeah. We have to help her.
- (NEDLEY): Alright,
791
00:32:53,811 --> 00:32:55,076
we've done the final calculations,
792
00:32:55,080 --> 00:32:56,377
and it turns out it's a dead tie
793
00:32:56,382 --> 00:33:00,080
between Waverly Earp and Jeremy Chetri.
794
00:33:00,085 --> 00:33:02,349
Come on up here for a
sudden-death playoff round.
795
00:33:02,354 --> 00:33:04,905
(JEREMY, PANTING): I am
so sorry, Doc, I can't help it!
796
00:33:04,910 --> 00:33:06,340
Neither can I.
797
00:33:06,345 --> 00:33:08,776
If I have to do this alone then I will!
798
00:33:08,781 --> 00:33:09,843
One question at a time,
799
00:33:09,848 --> 00:33:11,328
- five seconds to answer.
- Okay.
800
00:33:11,984 --> 00:33:13,951
(WHOOSHING)
801
00:33:14,786 --> 00:33:17,885
Dammit. I simply cannot miss trivia.
802
00:33:17,890 --> 00:33:20,888
Literally. We cannot
waste another moment.
803
00:33:20,893 --> 00:33:22,656
One of you must lose, and posthaste.
804
00:33:22,661 --> 00:33:26,293
- Well, she's your sister!
- Uh! You're found family!
805
00:33:26,298 --> 00:33:28,028
You chose her. You lose.
806
00:33:28,033 --> 00:33:29,262
Snap out of it!
807
00:33:29,267 --> 00:33:30,801
(ALL): We can't!
808
00:33:31,737 --> 00:33:33,571
If we have no other choice.
809
00:33:35,007 --> 00:33:36,570
I wish she would lie on the gurney.
810
00:33:36,575 --> 00:33:38,175
(WHOOSHING)
811
00:33:40,112 --> 00:33:42,442
(WYNONNA GRUNTS AND PANTS)
812
00:33:42,447 --> 00:33:43,710
(KURU CHUCKLING, COUGHING)
813
00:33:43,715 --> 00:33:45,746
(GINNY): I guess I know what's next.
814
00:33:45,751 --> 00:33:49,787
- What's that?
- You get me to finish the job.
815
00:33:50,989 --> 00:33:52,223
Mm-hmm.
816
00:33:53,959 --> 00:33:55,126
Fine!
817
00:33:57,763 --> 00:33:59,726
- I wish for a knife.
- (WYNONNA): Doug.
818
00:33:59,731 --> 00:34:01,294
Kuru!
819
00:34:01,299 --> 00:34:03,834
I am the demon Kuru.
820
00:34:05,203 --> 00:34:07,300
I will be removing this brain...
821
00:34:07,305 --> 00:34:09,236
- (WYNONNA WHIMPERING)
- ... myself.
822
00:34:09,241 --> 00:34:11,108
(SINISTER MUSIC)
823
00:34:12,044 --> 00:34:14,041
Doc! Hey, what's going on up there?
824
00:34:14,046 --> 00:34:16,243
Jeremy and Waverly are
caught in a stalemate.
825
00:34:16,248 --> 00:34:18,545
And I believe Wynonna
to be in grave danger.
826
00:34:18,550 --> 00:34:20,047
So I take it you're stuck here too?
827
00:34:20,052 --> 00:34:22,749
Well, I suppose we all
are until trivia ends,
828
00:34:22,754 --> 00:34:24,952
when one of them answers incorrectly.
829
00:34:24,957 --> 00:34:26,257
Or doesn't answer at all.
830
00:34:28,961 --> 00:34:30,661
We'll need a distraction.
831
00:34:33,231 --> 00:34:34,598
We need Chicken-kicker.
832
00:34:36,868 --> 00:34:38,598
Okay. Next question.
833
00:34:38,603 --> 00:34:41,134
- According to Greek mythology...
- Hey. Phone. Now.
834
00:34:41,139 --> 00:34:43,370
Oh, please don't check
my browser history.
835
00:34:43,375 --> 00:34:45,739
Okay, we'll talk about that later.
836
00:34:45,744 --> 00:34:48,141
- Rachel, I need the video.
- What video?
837
00:34:48,146 --> 00:34:50,777
The video. Chicken-kicker.
838
00:34:50,782 --> 00:34:52,779
I deleted it. I respect the ban.
839
00:34:52,784 --> 00:34:54,885
No one in their right mind
would delete that video.
840
00:34:56,722 --> 00:34:58,489
It's in a folder marked "Tax Stuff".
841
00:34:59,725 --> 00:35:01,521
Clever girl.
842
00:35:01,526 --> 00:35:05,091
Okay, I just need to find the Bluetooth.
843
00:35:05,096 --> 00:35:06,226
(NEDLEY): Waverly Earp.
844
00:35:06,231 --> 00:35:10,497
A tribe in Papua New Guinea
is affected by this condition
845
00:35:10,502 --> 00:35:13,133
- when eating brain.
- Oh!
846
00:35:13,138 --> 00:35:14,872
Goodbye, self-respect.
847
00:35:15,974 --> 00:35:17,771
(NICOLE IN VIDEO): Hello.
848
00:35:17,776 --> 00:35:21,408
You losers didn't vote
for me for Sheriff,
849
00:35:21,413 --> 00:35:22,776
but I stayed!
850
00:35:22,781 --> 00:35:25,746
(SLURRING): I'm the one who stayed!
851
00:35:25,751 --> 00:35:29,550
And now you just wanna
stuff your dumb faces
852
00:35:29,555 --> 00:35:30,817
while celebrating Holt?!
853
00:35:30,822 --> 00:35:32,319
Waverly, do you have an answer?
854
00:35:32,324 --> 00:35:36,957
Well, fuck your votes, fuck your dinner!
855
00:35:36,962 --> 00:35:39,659
And fuck this chicken!
856
00:35:39,664 --> 00:35:42,095
- (SCREAMING)
- (BAR PATRONS LAUGHING)
857
00:35:42,100 --> 00:35:43,261
(NEDLEY): Your chance
to win the tournament.
858
00:35:43,265 --> 00:35:45,065
Kuru!
859
00:35:45,070 --> 00:35:46,566
Kuru!
860
00:35:46,571 --> 00:35:48,535
(NEDLEY): Yes! Jeremy Chetri,
861
00:35:48,540 --> 00:35:51,705
you have the biggest,
tastiest brain in Purgatory!
862
00:35:51,710 --> 00:35:53,140
Yeah!
863
00:35:53,145 --> 00:35:54,745
(MAGICAL CHIMING)
864
00:35:58,216 --> 00:35:59,546
What?
865
00:35:59,551 --> 00:36:01,719
I'm sorry, I'm sure your
brain tastes terrible.
866
00:36:03,889 --> 00:36:05,289
Praise be.
867
00:36:06,458 --> 00:36:08,955
Ginny! Ginny, get Peacemaker! Help!
868
00:36:08,960 --> 00:36:10,157
I can't do shit.
869
00:36:10,162 --> 00:36:11,825
(SCREAMING)
870
00:36:11,830 --> 00:36:13,693
- (KURU MOANING)
- Help!
871
00:36:13,698 --> 00:36:15,462
And I need a more Zen atmosphere.
872
00:36:15,467 --> 00:36:16,830
I wish for her to stop screaming.
873
00:36:16,835 --> 00:36:18,035
(SCEAMING STOPS)
874
00:36:19,704 --> 00:36:21,535
(EXHALING)
875
00:36:21,540 --> 00:36:22,973
You know, I don't feel so good.
876
00:36:23,642 --> 00:36:25,138
I wish for a bigger knife.
877
00:36:25,143 --> 00:36:26,807
Sure, that's what's stopping you.
878
00:36:26,812 --> 00:36:28,809
I am Kuru!
879
00:36:28,814 --> 00:36:31,144
I am Kuru, and I can be strong too.
880
00:36:31,149 --> 00:36:32,245
(WHIMPERING)
881
00:36:32,250 --> 00:36:33,680
I can be st... (GAGGING)
882
00:36:33,685 --> 00:36:34,782
(GAGGING)
883
00:36:34,787 --> 00:36:37,484
Okay. Just come to me
and I'll take care of it.
884
00:36:37,489 --> 00:36:39,190
I need street brains.
885
00:36:39,725 --> 00:36:40,825
I wish...
886
00:36:41,893 --> 00:36:44,228
I tried Wynonna, but it is what it is.
887
00:36:45,230 --> 00:36:47,064
(THUDDING)
888
00:36:49,134 --> 00:36:52,332
Whoa! What the hell! Ah!
(BREATHING HEAVILY)
889
00:36:52,337 --> 00:36:53,867
He's dead, Wynonna.
890
00:36:53,872 --> 00:36:57,871
- Were you gonna let him cut me?
- Uh, I was killing time.
891
00:36:57,876 --> 00:36:59,577
His cannibal brain's been
rotting for weeks.
892
00:36:59,581 --> 00:37:02,016
It was obv he was
about to kick it, so...
893
00:37:03,882 --> 00:37:05,946
Sup, Doc. Where ya been?
894
00:37:05,951 --> 00:37:07,581
You alright?
895
00:37:07,586 --> 00:37:09,486
It's all Kuru, baby.
896
00:37:10,555 --> 00:37:11,985
So, who had the tastiest brain?
897
00:37:11,990 --> 00:37:13,524
So this is yours?
898
00:37:14,493 --> 00:37:16,894
Hey... I'm Ginny.
899
00:37:21,050 --> 00:37:23,547
A drink for the champion!
900
00:37:23,552 --> 00:37:26,984
Oh! Hey! Do you wanna try on the hat?
901
00:37:26,989 --> 00:37:28,953
- I'm good.
- Nah, seriously,
902
00:37:28,958 --> 00:37:31,555
- you should try it on.
- Nah.
903
00:37:31,560 --> 00:37:33,791
I don't have to sit here
if you don't want me to.
904
00:37:33,796 --> 00:37:35,159
And miss my opportunity
905
00:37:35,164 --> 00:37:37,094
to speak with the
Chicken-kicker herself?
906
00:37:37,099 --> 00:37:38,763
(LAUGHING): Okay, well,
907
00:37:38,768 --> 00:37:41,032
anything that you want to
know on chicken kicking,
908
00:37:41,037 --> 00:37:42,904
I will happily oblige.
909
00:37:44,340 --> 00:37:46,671
But I know there's something
else you'd rather hear about.
910
00:37:46,676 --> 00:37:49,907
You were gonna trade me to the Clantons?
911
00:37:49,912 --> 00:37:52,009
Look. There's no excuse, okay?
912
00:37:52,014 --> 00:37:54,816
But... I had reasons.
913
00:37:55,818 --> 00:37:57,214
It brought Waverly home to me.
914
00:37:57,219 --> 00:37:59,354
- I was a part of that too.
- I know.
915
00:38:00,656 --> 00:38:02,924
I will be forever grateful.
916
00:38:05,094 --> 00:38:07,229
Doc, I'm sorry, but I had to be sure.
917
00:38:07,897 --> 00:38:09,326
What did they even want with me?
918
00:38:09,331 --> 00:38:11,128
No clue.
919
00:38:11,133 --> 00:38:13,664
But I knew that whatever it was,
920
00:38:13,669 --> 00:38:15,266
that you could handle it.
921
00:38:15,271 --> 00:38:18,702
And if you didn't, then we
were gonna figure it out.
922
00:38:18,707 --> 00:38:19,908
Together.
923
00:38:20,576 --> 00:38:22,036
'Cause I'd fight for you too, Doc.
924
00:38:24,313 --> 00:38:26,281
I appreciate that, Sheriff Haught.
925
00:38:27,683 --> 00:38:30,082
You know you're the only one
who still calls me that, right?
926
00:38:30,086 --> 00:38:32,821
The badge alone does
not give the authority.
927
00:38:34,023 --> 00:38:37,321
Yeah. Tell that to the people
who saw me kick a chicken.
928
00:38:37,326 --> 00:38:40,791
(NICOLE IN VIDEO): Chicken! (SCREAMING)
929
00:38:40,796 --> 00:38:42,030
Why don't you tell them?
930
00:38:53,576 --> 00:38:54,976
Hey everybody, listen up!
931
00:38:56,212 --> 00:38:57,908
(VIDEO RECORDING BEEPS)
932
00:38:57,913 --> 00:39:00,248
Yeah. You getting this? Good.
933
00:39:01,217 --> 00:39:02,751
Show of hands here:
934
00:39:04,220 --> 00:39:05,854
who voted for me?
935
00:39:10,493 --> 00:39:12,923
Well, I don't care. I'm not
embarrassed about it.
936
00:39:12,928 --> 00:39:15,426
We all do things we regret, right?
937
00:39:15,431 --> 00:39:17,094
So yeah, okay.
938
00:39:17,099 --> 00:39:19,463
I am Chicken-kicker.
939
00:39:19,468 --> 00:39:21,365
Yeah, ya are! (CHUCKLING)
940
00:39:21,370 --> 00:39:22,867
But I'm still gonna be your sheriff.
941
00:39:22,872 --> 00:39:25,269
'Cause I made a promise.
942
00:39:25,274 --> 00:39:28,773
I made a promise to serve and protect
943
00:39:28,778 --> 00:39:31,312
every single person in this town.
944
00:39:33,149 --> 00:39:34,582
Even those that break the law.
945
00:39:35,718 --> 00:39:39,016
Or slice their grilled cheese
sandwich lengthwise instead
946
00:39:39,021 --> 00:39:42,253
of diagonally, which...
I've never understood.
947
00:39:42,258 --> 00:39:45,026
Or don't like me...
948
00:39:46,162 --> 00:39:47,829
because I'm an outsider.
949
00:39:49,431 --> 00:39:50,598
Because I'm gay.
950
00:39:52,801 --> 00:39:54,265
I don't care that she's gay!
951
00:39:54,270 --> 00:39:57,205
Even those who literally ate feces.
952
00:39:58,507 --> 00:40:00,671
You eat shit one time and it's...
953
00:40:00,676 --> 00:40:02,773
It's kinda like kicking a chicken.
954
00:40:02,778 --> 00:40:03,778
One time.
955
00:40:07,483 --> 00:40:10,714
You know, folks, we've
all made mistakes.
956
00:40:10,719 --> 00:40:13,688
And it usually happens with
things we care about the most.
957
00:40:16,659 --> 00:40:20,094
We do need you, Sheriff Haught.
958
00:40:22,998 --> 00:40:25,930
Revote's unanimous. You're reinstated.
959
00:40:25,935 --> 00:40:28,736
(CHEERING AND APPLAUSE)
960
00:40:33,042 --> 00:40:34,605
Oh, my god.
961
00:40:34,610 --> 00:40:37,541
I finally get Wynonna's bad boy thing.
962
00:40:37,546 --> 00:40:38,976
Chicken-kicker is hot.
963
00:40:38,981 --> 00:40:41,149
(GIGGLING)
964
00:40:45,955 --> 00:40:47,922
(TWINKLING RINGTONE)
965
00:40:55,364 --> 00:40:58,362
Here to be my matriarch?
966
00:40:58,367 --> 00:40:59,734
No.
967
00:41:03,372 --> 00:41:04,802
But we got him.
968
00:41:04,807 --> 00:41:07,071
- The disease got him.
- Did it?
969
00:41:07,076 --> 00:41:10,537
- Or do all your... masters...
- Careful.
970
00:41:10,542 --> 00:41:11,842
... die like that?
971
00:41:11,847 --> 00:41:14,945
- Diseased and full of rot.
- Doug was sick.
972
00:41:14,950 --> 00:41:16,480
Dude ate brain.
973
00:41:16,485 --> 00:41:17,919
See, what I think,
974
00:41:19,021 --> 00:41:21,051
having a genie,
975
00:41:21,056 --> 00:41:23,988
all that choice, it makes them insane.
976
00:41:23,993 --> 00:41:27,958
And then you get to kill
for them. You like it.
977
00:41:27,963 --> 00:41:30,428
Well, I was just doing
what I have to do.
978
00:41:30,433 --> 00:41:32,229
I'm the victim.
979
00:41:32,234 --> 00:41:33,631
You said so yourself.
980
00:41:33,636 --> 00:41:36,200
You may be a genie, but
you are still a demon.
981
00:41:36,205 --> 00:41:37,602
He was just some idiot.
982
00:41:37,607 --> 00:41:39,407
And you'll find another one.
983
00:41:41,114 --> 00:41:42,944
You're too powerful a weapon.
984
00:41:42,949 --> 00:41:46,214
I realized it when you got Doug
to wish for me to be quiet.
985
00:41:46,219 --> 00:41:47,949
I couldn't listen to you cry for help
986
00:41:47,954 --> 00:41:49,317
when I couldn't help you!
987
00:41:49,322 --> 00:41:51,649
You gotta listen to the screams.
988
00:41:51,654 --> 00:41:54,618
You have to look the
cost of this in the eye
989
00:41:54,623 --> 00:41:56,557
and tell it to go fuck itself.
990
00:42:00,694 --> 00:42:01,895
Okay.
991
00:42:03,766 --> 00:42:05,400
You want a new choice?
992
00:42:09,538 --> 00:42:11,468
Have all the choices you want.
993
00:42:11,473 --> 00:42:12,903
I've already had a curse.
994
00:42:12,908 --> 00:42:14,204
I can stop what's coming.
995
00:42:14,209 --> 00:42:16,006
I can stop what's coming.
996
00:42:16,011 --> 00:42:17,612
I could make him love you again.
997
00:42:23,252 --> 00:42:25,049
Hmm.
998
00:42:25,054 --> 00:42:27,055
(WHIRRING)
999
00:42:30,025 --> 00:42:31,889
Make Doc choke it down.
1000
00:42:31,894 --> 00:42:33,128
I get it.
1001
00:42:34,195 --> 00:42:35,491
I'm poison too.
1002
00:42:35,496 --> 00:42:38,394
With a psychotic gun for a master.
1003
00:42:38,399 --> 00:42:39,862
We're the same.
1004
00:42:39,867 --> 00:42:41,468
The difference is that...
1005
00:42:43,200 --> 00:42:44,496
you have a way out.
1006
00:42:44,501 --> 00:42:46,632
No, you don't have to.
1007
00:42:46,637 --> 00:42:47,833
Genie.
1008
00:42:47,838 --> 00:42:51,874
(GUNSHOT, SCREECHING)
1009
00:42:54,283 --> 00:42:55,548
You're free.
1010
00:42:55,598 --> 00:43:00,148
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