All language subtitles for The Alphabet Murders

MGM presents...

That's me.

MGM presents me as...

...as Hercule Poirot, the Belgian sleuth.

Au revoir.

No, no, no, no. Don't
try to sneak up on Poirot, my friend.

It could be... dangerous.

Now I know that normally
wherever Poirot goes,

there is intrigue, excitement...

...murder.

But not here, not today,
not in London.

No, I'm here actually
simply to see my tailor.

Now, if you've been with me
last week...

...in Istanbul...

Well...

There we are.

I'm sorry. Again, au revoir.

Please, do not follow Poirot.

This is London. Nothing is going
to happen. Goodbye.

What, may I ask,
is the meaning of this?

What is the meaning of, eh...

...what, monsieur Poirot?

This, this...

That?

It tegs.

"Tugs"?

Tugs, tugs, is it tugs?

Aaa!

"Aaa"... Aaa what?

Cigarette?

Yes... no.

No, I don't want a cigarette.
Put them away.

Just as I thought, sir.

We have given out smoking since
our last fitting, have we not?

We have, and we do not care
to discuss it.

Not I need is to upset the nerves,
what is why I might say...

...we exchange the weed for the weight.

And the bulge is no longer
disguisable.

- Belge?
- "Bulge".

I have no "bulge", I 've not
changed my shape.

Perhaps you would be so kind as to
observe this jacket, the one you came in.

Notice the crease.

It, also, "tugs".

I'm afraid we have only two alternatives.

Either we resume smoking...
or we diet.

I shall do neither.

Thank you, Cracknell.

Here you are, sir. Snooping about
just like you said he would be.

You picked well for a discreet
killing, my friend.

Very professional.

What do you have to say
for yourself? Mmm?

Come on, speak up!

Doesn't seem to want to talk, sir.

Your hand, Cracknell.

Well, explain yourself.

Parlez-vous français?

Parli italiano?

Sprichst Du deutsch?

Hablas español?

Ομιλείτε ελληνικά;

Bamazaga pyaw daq lar?

I'm neither French, Italian, German,
Greek, Spanish or Burmese.

I happen to be an Englishman.

Then you have disgraced yourself.

How so, pray?

One does not expect an Englishman
to be an assassin.

Good heavens, I haven't come here to
assassinate you. I've come here to protect you.

Protect me, indeed, I've never heard
such an extraordinary assassin.

Can you support such a statement?

Certainly. Would you care
to see my credentials?

As you see, I'm temporarily attached to
the Ministry of Agriculture and Fisheries.

Be gone, Cracknell.

...Hastines.
- "Hastings".

Of course. Hestines.

By the way, how is sir Edouard?

- Sir Edward?
- Your chief.

Is that his name? I've always
known him as 'X'.

Really?... What is the interest
of the British Secret Service in Poirot?

Her Majesty's government seems to think
that you're a very important person...

...and, as such,
are entitled to protection.

I understand you're not very popular
with the criminal classes.

No.

It would be the most almighty
top-level fuss, you know,

if you were stabbed, shot or blown up,

or did suffer any inconvenience
while on British soil.

Yes, yes, I suppose it would, actually.

In that case... I suppose you must join me
in a massage, my faithful bulldog.

One never knows, does one?

You know, I once found
a black widow in my bed.

Black widow in his bed?

Whether why I should object to that,
unless she wasn't very...

Ah, Cracknell...

Be ruthless, Cracknell,
be merciless.

Oh, oh, oh, oh.

Too hard.

Monsieur Poirot...

...There's going to be a murder.

This is a secret establishment, you should
be on the other side of the building.

There's going to be murder.

I'm frightened! That's why I'm here.
I'm terribly frightened.

Oh, you think someone
is going to kill you, eh?

No, I'm going to kill someone.

No more massage, please.

I can't help it, you see, I must kill.

Hastines!

Hastis!

Don't call out, monsieur Poirot!

Hastis!
Hastis!

Don't do that, monsieur Poirot,
don't do that, you mustn't do that,

you can't do that!

- Hastis!
- I killed this morning already a man.

- His initials were A.A.
- A.A., eh?

I've killed before, I must kill again.

Hatistes!

I'm so sorry.

- Don't do that, now listen to me!
- Cracknell! Cracknell!

- Oh, I am sorry, sir.
- Cracknell! Help me!

- How, sir?
- I don't know this woman.

Alright, young woman, on your way.

Get out!

After her!

Come back. Come back.

You assure, we wish to
commerce with brandy--

Yes, yes! Yes.

Monsieur.

Ah! Extraordinary.

And this is even more extraordinary.

What is?

That such a chic creature has
nothing in her handbag.

No mirror, no make-up, nothing.

What is this?

It's a scoring card
from a bowling alley.

How you can eat in a time like this?

It is not for this
you may believe me...

...It is for this.

The little gray cells...

AAA! ABC!

Her initials. A. B. C.

Good Lord.

I also read the newspapers.
Now I ask myself...

Why should you wish to kill Poirot?

You wanna be jolly careful from now on.
Where you go, what you do...

...what you eat...

She used poison on the dart,
it says it there.

- Well, then, you better taste it.
- Oh, no!

- I don't think there's but a chance...
- It's your duty, you're here to protect me.

- I don't normally eat pâté.
- Taste!

- I say, this is rather good.
- This is a challenge to Poirot...

Why should this woman have
nothing in her handbag... except that.

My little braincells tell me... obviously
she wants me to go to the bawling.

- The bawling?
- Yes.

- Now, why?
- Ow, the "bowling".

Maybe she's in love with me...
It's happened before.

Very well... I shall go!

Now, care, for your own sake,
why don't you cut back the Brussels.

I shall go where I choose,
when I choose, how I choose.

In that case, it would be my painful duty
to stay right behind you.

Les oignons, monsieur.

I shall prepare the seasoning.

Thank you!

Now, the vinegar...

Just enough, eh? Yes.
Now, the salt...

Do you mind?
Thank you.

Right. Now, lemon...

Very good.

Now... the brandy...

No, not enough. A good tâte.

Bet you you can't do it again.

- I need some bowling shoes,
in a hurry, please. - What size?

I'm afraid I don't know the size, I usually
have my shoes made for me. If you don't mind

getting to the back of the queue, sir,
we'll see if we can knock you up a pair.

Looking for someone to play with?

I am looking for someone, actually, yes.

- Well, this someone is Betty Barnard.
- I'm very pleased to meet you...

...miss Barnard but I'm expecting someone.

It seems she stood you up,
doesn't it?

It would seem so, yes.

- Maybe you can help me.
- Rather depends of what you have in mind.

I'll be off in a few minutes...
Got a cigarette?

Egyptian on the right,
Virginian on the left.

Solid gold!... Hercule
from Danielle.

- Who's Danielle? - The most
beautiful woman in Europe, actually.

Light?

Of course.

Won't you join me?

- No, thank you, I've given them up.
- Then why do you carry them with you?

To strengthen my willpower.

What good is willpower?

- May I have my cigarette case, please?
- How much is it worth?

It is beyond price.

- It's mine.
- And this is mine!

Me... You couldn't afford
the down payment.

C'mon, get your coat,
you've got a date, remember.

So I have.

- I happen to be looking for a young lady.
- So I noticed.

Very tall... Very beautiful...
Very blonde.

Very strong... A little strange
in a manner, you know?

I don't know her name... But her
initials are A B C.

- You know her!
- No.

Now, why should you say that?

- AAA, you can tell me about her.
- You bet your life I c-

Shut up!

There's no point in asking her about women.
All she knows about is men.

- Especially the size of their wallets.
- Alright... That's it Don Fortune!

May I have
my cigarette case, please?

There's your case!

My goodness, easy, young people
certainly take their bowling seriously.

Hey, Poirot, where are you going?
Come back, Poirot!

Hey, you! Bring back my shoes.

Poirot! Come back.

Hey, you! Fat boy!

- Hey, you!
- Let go of me, will you, let go of me.

- Where do you think you're going?
- I have to follow a man.

Young lady!

Young lady, I've been
looking for you.

I am Hercule Poirot, now surely
you wanted me to find you.

I don't know you,
what do you want?

Oh, come on, of course you remember
wrestling with me in the steam room.

I don't know what you're talking about.
I've never seen you before--

Will you, please, turn this off?

- You want some help, miss?
- Yes, please...

This man keeps bothering me.

Please...

...Please, young lady...

Please!

- Please...
- I think you better catch some other bus.

- You mind your own business.
- No mind his as long as you mind yours.

That young lady is my business.

She doesn't think so!

- You mind your business!
- You just clear off.

- Someone get the police!
- That's a good idea. Call the police.

Call the police!

Thank you.

What's all this, then?

Isn't a bit late for Christmas?

Sorry, sir... Been a long night.

You've noticed that too, have you?

I want to borrow some boots.

- Boots?
- Boots!

I suppose it wouldn't be in the
national interest to inquire why--

No!

No, sir.

What size boots, sir?

Well, I generally have--

Guess, well, we won't go into
all that again...

Just give me the largest
boots you have.

Dragbot!

Take your boots off!

No questions...
Take off your boots.

Now, then... I want to help in tracing
a very important missing person.

I better see your inspector
in charge of C.I.D.

I'm afraid you can't, sir.
He's out on a case.

Well, get him back!

It's a case of murder, sir.
Scotland Yard are involved.

Yes, and we don't want little
routine matters added to it.

Did you say "murder"?

These things do happen, sir.

Thank you, Dragbot.

- Boots.
- Thank you.

I suppose the victim wasn't a little
short bald-headed Belgian...

...with a bit of a beak, was he?

I hope they fit, sir.

You don't mean...

...very short?

Very bald, a little
Belgian with a beak?

This is what I just said!

This way, sir.

Well, the charge is using insulting
behaviour towards a young woman...

...with intent to commit
a breach of the peace.

There's nothing to worry about...
He claims he's doing his yogurt.

P-Poirot, what are you doing there?
Get up... Get down at once!

- Open the door, come on!
- Yes, sir.

When I collected your clothes from the hotel,
they asked me when you were leaving.

I told them today.

Then you eerd my derrasting...
You eerd...

Your... valuable, sir.

- I'm sorry, sir--
- I do not wish to discuss it...

...or even to think about it.

Look, why don't you go home, then
I could go home, I've been up all night...

...my wife won't understand.

There is a telephone,
there is a telephone--

I'm not allowed to tell her
that I'm in the secret service...

...she thinks I'm in the Ministry
of Agriculture and Fisheries.

Beyond belief!

Please tell me where you're going.

I cannot see why they're having
such difficulty.

The whole thing is
very clear, Mr. Stringer.

I quite agree, miss Marple.

The solution is A-B-C to anyone
with half a braincell.

If you must know, I have
some unfinished business...

...with my little bawling instructors.

Then, I shall have
to come with you.

I can't prevent you, but, at least,
don't appear to be with me.

If you must follow,
must you follow so close?

Listen.

Follow!

You mustn't be afraid

It pays to be careful.

Violent boyfriend.

Is she dead?

Dead.

Any... any blad?

- "Blood"?
- Blood, blood!

No... just a book.

The initials of the blonde. ABC.

Well, you've taken your time
getting here.

You can thank monsieur Poirot,
for there's your murderer.

This is inspector Japp
of Scotland Yard.

- I've talked to your ambassador--
- Oh, how is he?

Oh, very well, sir.

I'd like to apologize for
this misunderstanding, sir...

I thought the name was Pairot, of course,
if I had realized it was Perot...

Poirot.

Never mind all that now.
Did you telephone my wife?

Oh, yes. She says she's looking
forward to having you home again.

- Inspector!
- Oh, yes...

Now, you said, this blonde young
serves this nutcase...

Actually, I said her manner
was rather strange, did I not?

Yes, yes...

You say you've seen her on
just those two occasions...

Yes... Try that trouser pocket, man!

He didn't happen to threaten you
with an airgun, sir...

Airgun?

Yes, that's how she was killed,
a poison dart in the neck...

...fired from a high velocity
air pistol.

Then don't you know it
was not a blow gun...

Congratulations.

Now, you've seen this blonde
only on these two occasions...

To repeat myself, yes.

- Thank you!
- And you, sir?

To repeat myself once,
give me the key, I'll manage.

You know, it's funny... She never
tried this airgun luck on you, sir.

I mean, likely seems
her modus operandi...

...I mean, there was
this water clown...

...and, now, this one,
same fatal deaths.

Yes...

That man's name was...
Albert Aachen... A.A.

The initials of my strange blonde...
A... B... C.

Her first victim... A.A.

Her second... B.B...

Her third...

C.C.

He thinks she's going right
through the alphabet, inspector.

Yeah, alright, sergeant, carry on.

How do you explain
this calling card?

A nutcase.

Could it be that someone wants to make
quite sure this girl, A.B.C., is blamed.

No, no... You thought for yourself.
She attacked you.

You jumped to that conclusion!

No, no, I didn't. You did.

Oh, come on, we're splitting hairs.
As the good inspector said...

She could easily have used
her... ergonomy twice...

Why did she not?

My little gray cells answer...

Maybe...she did not want
Poirot's life.

Maybe what she wanted was...
Poirot's help!

Well, for all the help she may wants,
she can get from us.

- From you?
- The police.

In the meantime, I'd be glad
if you and the captain...

...would accompany me to the police
station and write out your statements.

And, of course, any theories
you many have--

Statements? There is not time...

Afterwards, I'll be glad to provide you
with a motorcycle escort...

...to London airport.

Oh, that's very kind of him, isn't it?
Thank you, inspector.

Where is the bathroom?

Why?

- You'll better go with him, sir.
- No, I'm... Oh, I see what you mean, yes.

- Through there, sir.
- Thank you.

- I'll come.
- As you wish.

A thought for you
to conjure with, inspector...

Who is... C.C.

Help!

It came from the most beautiful
head in Europe

What?

I used it to pick your lock.

My wife.

No, no.

You've come here to make talk
with me about Betty, haven't you?

I'm in the position to
ask questions, not you.

Who is A.B.C.?

I thought last night
you knew about her...

And I thought last night
you knew about her.

I tried to pick her up
a few weeks ago...

Betty was giving me the runaround,
I wanted to make her jealous.

I did.

It's very important that
you tell me about this girl.

Her?

- No.
- Betty...

No.

A.B.C.

She gave me the brush off.

I don't know any more about her
that the initials on her handbag.

You'd want to talk
to Dr. Doncaster, not me.

Doncaster?

Some head shrinker she's
been going around with.

You don't seem to
like him very much.

He's after Betty, too.

But why don't you go and bother him.

You're obviously potty,
so he'll be fascinated.

- I think we will meet again.
- I hope so.

Then I shall be able to
break your neck one time.

Excuse me, madam.

Hi! You have a death wish, I see.

Aah! Dr. Doncaster. Your secretary
told me I'd find you here.

- Did she indeed?
- Yes.

Speaking of a death wish...

...do the initials A.B.C. mean
anything to you?

- Should they?
- Or the name Betty Barnard?

Can't we have him arrested?

Well, it seems we're acquainted.

One of your patients, obviously.

Not a patient exactly, no.

No, although it is true, madam...

...I would like to discuss with
Dr. Doncaster what I have on my mind.

In Rotten Row?

That depends on the good doctor,
doesn't it?

Yes, well, shall we say
at my office in an hour.

I don't think we should say
anything of the sort, darling...

...because in an hour you'll
be somewhere with me.

Yes, of course.

I'm afraid I shan't be free
until six o'clock.

Very well.

Six, sharp.

Where have I seen her before?

Where have I see--

Monsieur Poirot!

Monsieur Poirot!

You were looking for me
last night, weren't you?

And I found you, you remember.

Not exactly.

I did tell you about AA,
didn't I?

Yes, you did.

And now, you're going to
tell me about BB?

Mmm?

Oh, please...

Don't do that.

Let's talk.

B.B. is dead. Who killed her?

- Do you want my balloons?
- Yes.

Then I'll have your funny hat.

Alors!

Now, let's gather around.

I propose to assume...

...generally still somewhere
in this area, here.

Now, I propose to divide it into
convenient sections...

...and a lot one car and two
of you to each section. See?

- Now... Jenkins?
- Yes, sir Edward...

... I mean, sir 'X'.

And, Robert, so, I think,
you take this area here...

I quite agree, sir, it's not
in the best tradition of the service.

I don't regard him as being lost, sir,
I regard him as being temporarily mislaid.

Thank you, sir.

...Now, Dunham and Evitson,
that area, down there.

Now, look here, inspector...

The odd murder here and there
is neither here nor there.

'X' tells me that if anything
happens to Poirot...

...Her Majesty's government would
have to apolog--

He's got to be found!

Yeah, well, you look after your nutcase,
captain, and I'll look after mine.

Japp.

Yes... yes...

What?

- He's been at it, again, sir.
- Has he, where?

Where?

Hyde Park. Molesting
a young woman, sir.

- Oh, my goodness...
- What, on a horse?

- You mean she was on the horse?
- Who was on the horse?

Oh, he was.

Well, that's something to
be thankful.

No, get me a car
and two motorcycles.

I thought you'd given up smoking.

This is a celebration.

Oh, really?

What are you celebrating?

I'm celebrating my first cigarette
in 51 days.

You must have one.

Oh, that's awfuly nice of you.

Oh, that's very nice of you.

- We're friends, aye?
- Of course!

Good. I was so hoping you'd know
that if you couldn't see it from

the Majesty's government's POV...

...you would see it from mine.

Well, I mean, I got really no interest
in this matter except...

...just to get home.

Explain things to my wife...

...get a shave...

...get these boots off.

- And get some sleep.
- Hmm, yes, of course.

Well, I mean, you've got
some sleep last night.

A little in the cell, yes.

All that yogi stuff... Upside down.

You slept like a mad.

Yes, I suppose I did.

I say...

These cigarettes are ripping.

Where did you get them?

I make them myself.

You know...

I've always wanted...
to make my own cigarettes.

Miss Sparks...

Yes, doctor?

I know I have another appointment
tonight, but you needn't wait.

- Goodnight.
- I could work late again.

Are you absolutely certain...
I mean, I'm quite sure you do--

Quite, quite sure.

Yes, doctor.

Doctor...it is exactly six o'clock.

Good evening.

I suppose your business
is blackmail.

My business is justice.

- I'm Poirot.
- I am not interested in your name.

Burning at what you're up... Poirot?

Hercule Poirot... Please...

- Won't you...
- Doctor...

Betty Barnard...

...is dead.

Shock tactics, eh, monsieur Poirot?

I'm sorry to dissapoint you...
It was in the evening papers.

You were an intimate
friend of hers, of course?

Of course.

- No tears, doctor?
- No tears, monsieur Poirot.

She was an experiment.

An experiment?

A near perfect specimen of the primitive
aggressive female acquisitive personality.

In lay language, a gold digger.

I see.

Women and their mental
processes are my work.

- Interesting work.
- I enjoy it.

Who is A.B.C.?

- ABC...
- Blonde. Beautiful. Very tall.

You're speaking of Amanda,
of course.

Amanda... Amanda who?

Amanda Beatrice Cross.

A-B-C...

Tell me about her.

I'm sorry, I never discuss
my patients with anyone.

Your patient, eh?

- You're still treating her?
- No, she went to Switzerland last month.

Some idea that the mountain air
would be beneficial.

I haven't seen her since.

And what if I tell you that
your former patient...

...has said she's a murderess.

I am not surprised.

That she said it,
or that she is?

She is a certain type of schizophrenic,
a split personality.

Perhaps I can explain it
in simple language.

A paranoid schizophrenic.
One half immature,

one half influenced by
a system of delusions.

Probably, delusions
of persecution.

Consentanious with a sharply developing
obsessional anxiety.

- Quite.
- One moment homicidal,

the next... frightened
and shy, actually.

Indeed.

Now, tell me, doctor...

Is it possible for this obsession to take
the form of a preoccupation with...

...the alphabet... A-B-C.

Monsieur Poirot... For you I'm
prepared to break the rule.

Would you sit down?

Listen.

A... B... C...

AA.

B... B.

BB.

ABC.

AA.

BB.

I injected her with
the so-called truth drug...

I use it sometimes to
break down inhibitions.

But is that all?

Yes. She proved 90%
pentothal resistant.

What she said there
was its only effect.

But, at least, it crystallized
her obsession.

So, that people with initials A.A.,
B.B., C.C. and so on...

...would be the natural targets
for a homicidal drive, eh?

Obviously.

Tell me, doctor...

...is it possible for such a person
to be dominated?

Dominated?

Used as an instrument?

Either for murder itself...
or a cover for murder?

It would make a...
fascinating experiment.

Thank you very much, doctor.

We shall resume this consoltation
at a future date.

Amanda!

Hide me...please hide me!

Amanda, you must go out
the way you came in.

No. Please no.

Go out the way you came in.

I'll do anything...

Anything...anything...

If you don't mind my saying so,
captain, your appearance is getting

a little embarassing, even
for the secret service.

A wash and brush up wouldn't--

Yes...well... It's only
a suggestion.

For there he is,
we must stop him!

Push the button! Come back!

- Drive... Drive! - I'm very
sorry, sir. This is a police car, sir.

Police?

Taxi!

Drive!

Come back, Poirot!

Sir Carmeekle Clarke. Well,
that would be the famous ship owner.

Carmeekle Clarke. C.C.

- CC!
- Yeah, and "way-way" to you, monsieur.

Where are you going?

6 Darlington Square,
and erry.

- 6 Darlington Square, are you sure?
- Yes, of co--

No.

We must go to the Dorchester,
I must change.

Are you suggesting that this
young woman is going about London

killing people and that she
now proposes to butcher me?

Yes.

- Simply because my initials are C.C.?
- Yes!

What you need, sir,
is a sherry.

- Thank you, sir.
- I'm sorry, monsieur Poirot...

...what you are saying
is sheer nonsense.

The police, at least,
don't think so.

In fact, I imagine, they'll be at
this home very shortly.

- Why?
- To protect you.

Sir Carmeekle...

Diane... May I remind you that
we are expecting a guest for dinner?

Oh, Judson...

Some men may be calling shortly,
they're police, send them away.

You may stay for as long as it takes you
to finish your sherry, monsieur Poirot.

Lady Carmeekle, is--

- Allow me.
- Thank you.

You just heard
our master's voice.

Lady Carmeekle...

- Is anything the matter?
- Egyptian tobacco.

- Do have one.
- No!

I mean, no, thank you.
I've given them up.

- Poor man.
- Lady Carmeekle...

I'm sure you can pursuade your
husband to take this matter seriously.

- Really?
- Yes, of course!

Monsieur Poirot...

In certain moods, no one can
persuade my husband of anything.

Not even me,
believe it or not.

My step brother lives in a
square world of his own, mr. Poirot.

For instance, he still thinks
I'm too young to drink.

Most people are.

I must say that he's
taking this whole affair

with remarkable coolness,
and so are you.

Seriously, old Clarke tires me
monotonously right.

For instance, if there's anything
wrong with Amanda,

she certainly won't
do us any harm.

As long as it takes you
to drink your sherry.

The master said.

Strange family.

Back door!

Go away!

I want a word with
sir Carmichael Clarke.

Sir Carmichael Clarke does not
want a word with you!

Right, captain,
we'll return to the Square.

If you'll be kind enough
to observe the premises,

I'll procure a search warrant.

It's alright, Judson.

Very good, madam.

- Look, someone came up after you--
- Nevermind, I've missed you.

Congratulations.

Why are you still here?

I was told I could
finish my sherry?

Well, I... never liked to
see a man drinking alone...

...why don't we join him, Diane?

Well... We are civilized, eh?

Tell me, doctor, how did you get
along with my friend, inspector Japp?

Oh, a plain-closed case of retarded
development, I should say.

But almost interesting is
the chap who was with him,

a sort of tramp in a bowler hat.

Oh, yes, they're inseperable.

- I put it to them--
- Allow me.

monsieur Poirot as
I put it to you.

Thank you.

This girl is lost, distracted...

- You've seen her?
- No, no, no.

But that's how I measure
she must be by now.

Anyhow, I feel that any shock...

...such as a clumsy attempt
to arrest her...

...might well send her right over
the edge into suicide.

Poor Amanda.

I offered my full cooperation
to inspector Japp...

...but I might as well have been
talking to a trained chimpanzee.

Did you also offer your full cooperation
in the case of Betty Barnard?

I... explained about her, yes.

May... may I have my lighter,
thank you.

Did you also explain that you
and miss Barnard were friends?

Actually, more than that?

Duncan!

Duncan?

Doncaster?

D.D.?

- Congratulations, sir.
- Car... Eavesdropping?

My wife is never jealous of me...
How very interesting...

The cheater cheated?

The deceiver deceived -- don't take
any long time off your sherry.

It's... it's such a large glass.

Didn't think I knew
about it, did you?

Sneak out in the middle of the night,
back before the old fool wakes.

So clever.

I presume you have some grants
for these allegations, sir Carmichael?

Grants? Certainly.

The word of a gentleman, which you
so obviously are not, sir.

I happen to be passing, sir.

- Ask mr. Franklin to come here, please.
- So it was Franklin.

- I'm afraid mr. Franklin is out, sir.
- Out? Where?

Well, he said he was
going to the Bellfray, sir.

- The Belfray?
- A gaming club!

Your precious step brother is
practically bought the place.

With your money.

- I don't believe you.
- Go, and see for yourself.

- I shall be dining alone, Judson.
- Very well, sir.

And I shall require
a taxi at 9 o'clock.

Well, I suppose I won't
finish my sherry.

Will you excuse me?
Madam... Doctor.

Hold up! Hold on!

I'm coming!
I'm coming!

I'm so sorry.
Please excuse me.

Thank you.

Sir Carmeekle.

- Leave me alone.
- Please, listen to me, sir.

Stand up. I want to
talk to you.

Sir, believe me, your life
is in danger.

That man is running away!
He did it! He did!

There he goes! After him!

I've got you!

A.B.C., I've got you!

Help! I've got the murderer!

Help me!

No, you fools!

Don't you, at least, wish to
know my thinking on this case?

Every policeman in London
is looking for A.B.C., yes?

Well... She's not only remarkably
beautiful and remarkably blonde,

she is about 6 feet tall.

Does not something strike you?

But of course, why haven't
you caught her?

Precisely!

Someone must be
harbering her.

"Harbering" her?

Harbering her!

Harboring her. That's right.

I ask myself... où?

My little gray cells reply:
"Probably dr. Doncaster."

Call him. Tell him A.B.C. has been
spotted, and your men are closing in.

Then, if I am right...

He'll go to her!

Exactly!

Really, it's so simple,
it's childish.

And that's all it is,
childish.

What kind of a nutty is gonna harbor
a nut who's already killed three times.

Oh, so sorry.

I trust you'll allow me to
accept defeat with dignity.

I don't relish this...

...this bum's rush.

No, no, of course not.

Alright, inspector.
I'll take it from here.

Come along.

I must say, you're taking
this extremely well.

Just like an Englishman.

- You flatter me.
- Not at all, I mean it.

- Thank you.
- Not at all.

Thank you!

- Allow me.
- Oh, thank you.

Help! Help!

I believe there's a man locked
in there. You must find a key.

To Town.

This hairpin came from the head
of the most difficult woman in England.

My wife's.

I think I'm beginning to think
I've underestimated you.

- Shall we return?
- Too much trouble.

Really?

If I put you on a plane,
you'll only come back on the next.

Oh, yes.

You're determined not to go home
until you solve the case.

Yes.

Very well, then, I shall
speed things up.

I've decided to help you...
Proceed, driver.

What you're going to do?

Well...

...I shall ring dr. Doncaster,
impersonate inspector Japp--

- You?
- Of course. It's easy.

"Hello. Dr. Doncaster?"

"This is inspector Japp."

Well, you'll be very wise
to tell him that.

- This is dr. Doncaster.
- Hello...

"This is inspector Japp,
here, sir."

"I think we may be able to
use your help after all, sir."

"We've just spotted
the young lady."

- Spotted her?
- "Spotted, sir."

"We're hoping to pick her up
at any moment."

So, if you just hold
yourself available, sir...

Where did you find her?

"Now, I'm afraid I can't tell you
any more... Just at the moment."

"Goodbye."

- Well, what did you think of that?
- Very good.

I could have done that.

You got to remember
the number of the car.

Yes. HMX13B.

A! HMX13B.

That's right, I forgot to tell you.
It's a big white american car.

In.

Oh, I really don't think I should care
for that. That's usually for the luggage.

You wish to work with Poirot?
In.

No, what have you done?

- What is it now?
- We're working together, yes?

- Well, where are we?
- Shh!

He went that way.

Well, wait.

My foot's stuck.

My foot's stuck!

Oh... Hello there.

Would you mind
coming over here?

Could you come
a little bit closer?

I wonder if I might
trespass on your kindness.

I... I can't get out.

It's my foot, you see,
it's got caught somehow.

Has your little foot
got caught?

- That's right.
- Has it?

Aaa, it's got caught.

Well, I'll have to
unlace your shoe.

Hold on.

Good evening.

Good night!

Oh, there you are,
mr. "Perot."

Yes.

And not back home,
in Brussels?

Is he dead?

Oh, yes, very much.

Steady on.
Steady. Here.

Sit down.

Thank you.

Poisoned dart,
I suppose, eh?

Yeah, in the neck.

And the usual, of course.

The girl! She was here.

She's not here now,
but we will find her.

But who hit Poirot?

Let's have him in.

Alright, you.

He admits to
clubbering you, sir.

Does he?

Oh, he made a
complete statement.

Did he?

He thought Doncaster killed
his girlfriend, Betty Barnard.

Did he?

- He was following the doctor...
- Was he?

- You were in the way...
- I was.

When he got to the cabin, Doncaster
was dead and the girl gone.

We're not holding him for the killing.
We know who did that, don't we?

Do we?

But, no doubt, you want to press
a charge ofr assault and battery.

I will?... No, It's not--

It's not in the public interest.

What isn't?

For it to become known
among the criminal classes...

...that Poirot can
be hit over the head!

Very well... See him off.

Call yourself a copper!

I am not a copper!

Well now... The deceased appears
to been harboring this young woman.

Yes... Well, any...

Thank you.

Any, what you would call,
clues, inspector?

Clues appertain the mysteries,
mr. Poirot. There is no mystery here.

Mmm, lipstick.

Egyptian cigarette.

So, that's what the girl smokes.

Yes.

And so does lady Diane Clarke.

Very interesting, I'm sure.

Where is Hastines?

Well, we might
introduce ourselves.

My name is Hastings.
Captain Hastings.

- Ministry of Agriculture and Fisheries.
- Callie. Found Victoria 1992.

How do you do?
I must make a note of that.

Hastis!

Hastines?

Hastines, it's Poirot.
I'll get you out!

What are you doing,
if I may ask?

My foot stuck in the lock,
must have jammed.

Oh, really?

We found the girl, sir.

My dear young la--

That's her. Stop her.

Right. Here on you,
get after her.

No, no, please, please!

If she sees someone coming,
she will jump!

She'll probably do that anyway.

Hurry up,
bring those nets!

Oh, but if she really
did come to me for help?

Are you still on
about that?

Go on, get up there!

If only I could
talk to her.

Now, look, mr."Perot", either
they go up, or you go up.

Hold my cane, please.

You will hurry
those nets, eh?

Bring those nets!

Amanda!

Amanda! Please come down.

If you come down,
I can assist you.

Amanda. Please.

You asked for my help before.
I want to help you, all I can.

I know you're not
to blame.

It's not your fault.
Amanda!

I'm your friend.

I know you're not
responsible.

It will be alright,
I promise!

Amanda...

...I want you to come down.

Too late...
It's too late.

No, it's not too late...

No!... No, Amanda!

Please!

Don't jump.
Please don't jump!

Let me try it.

It's really excellent.

You mustn't travel on
an empty stomach, you know.

Are you sure?

Well, here goes.

It's wonderful how they
get this stuff upped, you know.

It's nothing but a
load of leftovers--

- There you are.
- 'X'!

Not in public,
dear chap.

"Sir Edward", please.

How are you, Hercule?

Teddy, Teddy, my old friend,
good to see you, sit down.

Thank you.

I just thought I'd drop in and
wish you bon voyage, Hercule.

A pity the way things turned out...
From your POV I mean.

Well, of course it was an
open-and-shut case all along.

Curious you couldn't see that.

I often feel you
continental chaps

are just a little bit too
fanciful for your own good.

Gallic temperament, I suppose.

- Hey, Hastings.
- Oh, hey, yes.

Extraordinary mixed bag,
wasn't it?

I mean... a water clown,
a bowling alley instructress,

a ship owner and a psychiatrist.

No rhyme or reason in it.

Still, the poor thing
was quite mad.

Better off where she is,
I suppose. Bottom of the river.

Oh, well, that's life...
What have we here?

Kidneys?

I should have thought red herrings
are more in your line, eh, Hercule?

Red herring.

- Red herring, of course!
- What?

Kill four, to kill ONE.

- Teddy, my old friend, I'm sorry.
- Hercule, sit down.

You still have your health, Hercule.
The government wants to keep it that way.

In one hour from now, my private plane
will be taking you home, to Brussels.

Teddy, Teddy, my dear old--

You are dealing
with me, this time.

- Not him.
- Teddy...

...please, believe me.

I say... Hadn't I better make
the sauce for the jolly old "oignons"?

- Teddy, Teddy, please.
- Sauce, for the kidneys.

Yes!

Well, yes.

By Jove, I believe I can
help you there.

Aah, the kidneys, yes!
Now, first the sauce...

...lots and lots of sauce...

The brandy.

No, a bit more than that.

Alright. Now, ready?

Yes, indeed.

Alright. We pour it in...

Voilà!

- Please, close the door at once.
- Aah, the foreign gentleman.

I wish to speak
to mr. Franklin Clarke.

I'm afraid mr. Franklin
is out, sir.

Very well, then...
Lady Diane.

I'm afraid she's
also out, sir.

Where are they?

They are sure to be on the way to
Scotland, sir. The 17:32 from King's Cross.

Scotland?

For the funeral, sir.
Mr. Franklin and lady Diane...

...are taking my late employer
aboard one of his ships at Greenock.

The burial, you understand,
is to be at sea.

Afterwards, sir...

Mr. Franklin and lady Diane
are proceeding the same vessel

on a sunshine cruise
at the South Americas.

To recover from what they described
as "the strain of the past few days."

Aa, I see.

Come, get up.

I say, must we go
rushing around like this?

I'm already feeling
a bit queasy.

Is it my imagination,
or is it rather warm in here?

Mr. Franklin turned up the central
heating before leaving,

and instructed that
it remains as so, sir.

- It is somewhat warm.
- Good, then I'm alright.

Turned up the
central heating?

Hastines, don't stand
there like a monument.

Where have you been?
What have you been doing?

Arranging a little extra
insurance, my friend.

Oh, really? Personally, I always feel
perfectly safe with British Railways.

Mind you, it's very different
in France, isn't it?

I wouldn't know. I'm not
French, I'm Belgian.

Well, it's the same thing.
You both eat horse meat.

Oh, no offense,
old man.

After all, it's you and I now,
isn't it? Against the world!

Come in.

I think we deserve
a little drink, don't you?

Napoleon brandy. I've been
keeping it for a special occasion.

What shall we drink to?

Our good fortune,
don't you think?

Mind you... I feel sorry,
in a way.

Oh?

But I feel grateful to
old Car for being so... rich.

I'm grateful to you.

Is anything
the matter, Diane?

I don't know. Suddenly,
i feel dizzy.

- Really?
- Franklin, what's happening?

Franklin, it's the drink!
You've...

It's quite alright,
my darling...

I just want you to
sleep, for the moment.

Can I help you, honey?

I can manage.

Good evening!

Good evening...

Control yourself, madam.
I'm not stopping, madam.

Thank you.

- Poirot!
- Of course.

I think you owe me
an explanation.

Very well.

I believe you're now considerably
richer than you were, eh?

If you're refering to my expectations on
the death of my step brother, yes, I am!

- But...
- But? But, but?

Well, she did had it,
just as much as I do!

Oh, yes, yes, I do
know that, of course.

We were just, em... coming in here
to see if everything was alright...

...and then she passed out.

Assisted by a few grains of
barbiturate dissolved in brandy, eh?

Napoleon brandy, actually...
To resume!

I agree that lady Diane...
also has the motive.

Motive? Motive for what?

For killing four people
to kill... one!

And thus inherit a fortune.

Aye... I'm afraid you're
far ahead of me.

I ask myself... Why should
someone kill four times...

...and make it look like
the work of a maniac?

My little gray cells answer:

"Because there was an obvious
motive to kill just one of them!"

So obvious, in fact, that even our friend,
inspector Japp, would be onto it at once...

Unless...

...there were enough
red herrings.

I've killed no one. Neither my
step brother, nor anybody else.

Oh, I know that. I know
that you are no killer...

You see, the real killer,
killed just once too often.

Don't you agree?

You mean when
I killed myself?

It grieves me to admit
it did not occur to me at the time...

...But, then, everything
began to fall into place.

What, if when you went to
Switzerland, it was not for your health...

...but to contact... A.A.

What if... he taught you
his diving tricks...

How to fall from a great height
into the water and... survive. Yes?

You are very clever,
monsieur Poirot.

And so now I wonder why you
have deliberately involved Poirot in this?

Oh, baffling the great
monsieur Poirot adds a spice.

I'm sure you'll understand...
My vanity is as great as yours.

"Vanity"? What do
you mean, "vanity"?

Allow me to hypothesize
what will happen now...

I will join lady Diane
in that coffin...

...and together we
will be buried at sea...

...in place of sir Carmeekle Clarke,
whose body, even now...

...is being used to boost the
central heating of his own house.

- Exactly.
- You, then...

...will take the place
of lady Diane...

...and together with
your "brave" chaperone...

...sail to the South Americas,
with both halves of the fortune to come.

Exactly! And now,
monsieur Poirot...

...your death will be
an advantage to me.

But not, I'm afraid, to you.

Naturally, I anticipated my little remarks
would cause some small unpleasantness...

But I do hope my insurance
is still in effect.

What are you doing?
Stop it!

Stop that, will you?

I'm coming Poirot!
Poirot!

Hastines!

Hold steady, old fellow!
I'm on my way!

I'm coming, we're in
this together. Hold on!

- Where are you?
- I'll save you!

I'm coming! Poirot!

I'll save you!

Poirot! Save me!

Poirot! Help!

Sir... Hastines, dear friend,
you're taking this like a Belgian.