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1
00:00:02,033 --> 00:00:03,533
(gunfire)
(man, filtered voice)
Rogue 7-1-9,
2
00:00:03,534 --> 00:00:05,044
we got three bogeys in an S.U.V.
I need an R.P.G. A.S.A.P. Copy?
3
00:00:05,036 --> 00:00:07,536
(engine roars)
ROGUE 7-1-9, DO YOU COPY?
4
00:00:07,538 --> 00:00:09,178
(man) You like frag grenades,
you little bitch?
5
00:00:09,180 --> 00:00:10,680
KENNY, FOCUS!
6
00:00:10,681 --> 00:00:12,641
THIS FRENCH KID
KEEPS CALLING ME NAMES.
7
00:00:12,643 --> 00:00:14,723
Craig, how do you say
"Your mother" in French?
8
00:00:14,715 --> 00:00:16,185
WELL, IT DEPENDS
ON THE CONTEXT.
9
00:00:16,187 --> 00:00:17,187
CRAIG.
10
00:00:17,188 --> 00:00:18,548
OH, UM,VOTRE MERE.
11
00:00:18,549 --> 00:00:21,449
VOTRE MERE,
YOU LITTLE BAGUETTE! (laughs)
12
00:00:21,452 --> 00:00:23,292
(gunfire continues)
OKAY, I GOT THEIR FLAG.
KENNY, GRAB THE SNIPER RIFLE
13
00:00:23,294 --> 00:00:25,034
AND COVER ME
FROM THE WATER TOWER.
14
00:00:25,025 --> 00:00:26,025
If these guys light me up,
you gotta pick up the flag.
15
00:00:26,026 --> 00:00:27,196
ROGER.
16
00:00:27,198 --> 00:00:29,158
CRAIG, PROTECT THE BASE!
GOT IT.
17
00:00:29,160 --> 00:00:30,200
I'M RUNNING!
YOU ARE RUNNING.
18
00:00:30,201 --> 00:00:32,161
I'M RUNNING!
I AM KILLING.
19
00:00:32,163 --> 00:00:33,533
LOOK OUT! ON THE LEFT!
ON THE LEFT! WATCH MY FLANK!
20
00:00:33,534 --> 00:00:35,214
GO, WILL. GO, GO, GO, GO!
GO, GO, GO.
21
00:00:35,206 --> 00:00:37,036
YES! YES!
GO, GO, GO!
22
00:00:37,037 --> 00:00:38,367
YES!
YES! AAH!
23
00:00:38,369 --> 00:00:39,739
YES!
WHO'S THE MAN?!
24
00:00:39,740 --> 00:00:42,510
YOU'RE... THE... MAN!
YOU ARE DEFINITELY THE MAN.
25
00:00:42,513 --> 00:00:44,653
I AM THE MAN! I'M THEMAN!
26
00:00:44,645 --> 00:00:47,145
(gunfire continues)
(woman) WILL!
THE KIDS ARE SLEEPING!
27
00:00:47,148 --> 00:00:48,348
SORRY, HONEY.
28
00:00:48,349 --> 00:00:50,319
(gunfire continues,
shots ricochet)
29
00:00:50,321 --> 00:00:52,321
(whispers) I'M THE MAN!
30
00:00:52,323 --> 00:00:54,363
(whispers) YEAH, YOU ARE!
(whispers) ARE YOU IN TROUBLE?
31
00:00:54,355 --> 00:00:56,555
♪♪♪
32
00:00:56,557 --> 00:00:59,127
MM.
Hey, Will,
33
00:00:59,130 --> 00:01:01,760
HOW DID YOU GET THERESA TO BE
COOL WITH YOU PLAYING TONIGHT?
34
00:01:01,762 --> 00:01:05,202
I JUST ASKED HER
IN THE RIGHT WAY.
35
00:01:05,196 --> 00:01:08,136
YOU WANNA HAVE SEX?
36
00:01:08,139 --> 00:01:09,439
GETTING GAME TIME'S EASY.
37
00:01:09,440 --> 00:01:11,740
IT'S NATHAN'S BIRTHDAY GIFT
I CAN'T FIGURE OUT.
38
00:01:11,742 --> 00:01:13,502
I MEAN, WHAT DO YOU GET A KID
TURNING 13
39
00:01:13,504 --> 00:01:15,154
THAT SAYS, "I'M A MAN"?
40
00:01:15,146 --> 00:01:17,076
HOW ABOUT A COUPLE OF HOOKERS?
41
00:01:17,077 --> 00:01:19,207
OOH! OR A TRASH BAG
FULL OF CHICKEN WINGS?
42
00:01:19,210 --> 00:01:20,610
GET HIM A JOURNAL.
43
00:01:20,611 --> 00:01:22,251
A JOURNAL?
A JOURNAL.
44
00:01:22,253 --> 00:01:24,793
YEAH, UH, 13 CAN BE
A VERY CONFUSING AGE.
45
00:01:24,785 --> 00:01:27,115
A JOURNAL IS A GREAT PLACE
TO PUT ALL YOUR THOUGHTS
46
00:01:27,118 --> 00:01:29,418
AND DREAMS AND POETRY AND--
47
00:01:29,420 --> 00:01:31,120
YOU KNOW, ANOTHER GOOD PLACE
TO PUT ALL THOSE THINGS
48
00:01:31,122 --> 00:01:32,492
IS IN YOUR UTERUS.
49
00:01:32,493 --> 00:01:33,663
(gunfire)
50
00:01:33,664 --> 00:01:35,204
YOU KNOW WHAT?
FINE. I DON'T CARE.
51
00:01:35,196 --> 00:01:36,466
GET HIM A TRASH BAG
FULL OF HOOKERS.
52
00:01:36,467 --> 00:01:39,127
CRAIG,WHAT'S WRONG?
53
00:01:39,130 --> 00:01:41,330
I SAW LISA TODAY.
54
00:01:41,332 --> 00:01:42,572
AND I'M GETTING MARRIED
THIS SATURDAY,
55
00:01:42,573 --> 00:01:44,813
AND I JUST FELT LIKE
I HAD TO SEE YOU AGAIN.
56
00:01:44,805 --> 00:01:46,505
REMEMBER SOPHOMORE YEAR
57
00:01:46,507 --> 00:01:48,137
WHEN YOU WOULD COME TO MY DORM
WITH YOUR GUITAR
58
00:01:48,139 --> 00:01:49,739
AND SING "BROWN EYED GIRL"?
59
00:01:51,212 --> 00:01:54,592
YOU HAD THAT BEARD,
THAT SEXY BEARD.
60
00:01:57,148 --> 00:02:00,218
SO WHAT DO YOU THINK?
THAT WAS A CRY FOR HELP, YES?
61
00:02:00,221 --> 00:02:01,191
Right?
62
00:02:01,192 --> 00:02:03,152
YEAH, IT WAS A CRY FOR HELP.
63
00:02:03,154 --> 00:02:06,604
NO! THAT GIRL IS A NUT, CRAIG,
AND I KNOW ABOUT NUTTY GIRLS.
64
00:02:06,597 --> 00:02:08,127
I USED TO BE MARRIED TO ONE.
65
00:02:08,128 --> 00:02:10,758
YEAH, SPEAKING OF NUTTY GIRLS
YOU USED TO BE MARRIED TO,
66
00:02:10,761 --> 00:02:13,301
BRENDA IS GONNA BE
AT NATHAN'S PARTY ON SATURDAY.
67
00:02:13,304 --> 00:02:14,514
WHAT?!
68
00:02:14,505 --> 00:02:15,805
NO. NO WAY.
69
00:02:15,806 --> 00:02:17,806
(sets down controller)
70
00:02:17,808 --> 00:02:19,538
(beep)
71
00:02:19,540 --> 00:02:22,210
(telephone rings)
72
00:02:22,213 --> 00:02:24,183
TELL MY SISTER
TO PICK UP THE PHONE.
(ring
73
00:02:24,175 --> 00:02:25,315
THERESA, IT'S KENNY!
74
00:02:25,316 --> 00:02:27,276
(ring)
(Theresa)
TELL HIM I'M SLEEPING.
75
00:02:27,278 --> 00:02:28,578
TELL HER I CAN HEAR HER.
76
00:02:28,579 --> 00:02:30,919
I FEEL LIKE LISA WANTS ME
TO REACH OUT TO HER.
77
00:02:30,921 --> 00:02:33,321
FINE. I'LL JUST CALL HER CELL.
(beep)
78
00:02:33,324 --> 00:02:34,494
YEAH, I'LL CALL HER CELL.
79
00:02:34,485 --> 00:02:36,425
GUYS, COME ON. YOU'RE SUPPOSED
TO BE COVERING ME.
80
00:02:36,427 --> 00:02:38,427
(gunfire)
Guys, my flank! My--man down!
81
00:02:38,429 --> 00:02:40,259
Man down!
HI, LISA. UM...
82
00:02:40,261 --> 00:02:41,791
(man screams)
THANK YOU.
83
00:02:41,792 --> 00:02:43,292
IF YOU DON'T WANNA CALL ME BACK,
DON'T CALL ME BACK.
84
00:02:43,294 --> 00:02:45,844
BUT IF YOU DO WANNA CALL ME
BACK, THEN DO CALL ME BACK.
85
00:02:49,740 --> 00:02:51,400
NATHAN, COME DOWNSTAIRS,
PLEASE!
86
00:02:51,402 --> 00:02:52,642
HONEY, WILL YOU OPEN THIS
FOR ME?
87
00:02:52,643 --> 00:02:53,803
YEAH.
88
00:02:53,804 --> 00:02:55,354
OOH.
89
00:02:55,346 --> 00:02:58,346
THIS IS A JOB...
(click)
90
00:02:58,349 --> 00:03:00,879
FOR THE OLD MOHASKA!
OLD MOHASKA!
91
00:03:00,881 --> 00:03:02,251
HERE WE GO.
92
00:03:02,253 --> 00:03:04,323
(gasps)
93
00:03:04,315 --> 00:03:07,355
"ASSAULT OF THE DEAD TWO"!
THAT'S AWESOME! THANKS. MWAH.
94
00:03:07,358 --> 00:03:09,718
IT'S NOT FOR YOU.
IT'S FOR NATHAN'S BIRTHDAY.
95
00:03:09,720 --> 00:03:13,260
BUT THIS VIDEO GAME
IS VIOLENT AND SCARY.
96
00:03:13,264 --> 00:03:14,604
YEAH.
97
00:03:14,595 --> 00:03:15,765
IT SAYS RIGHT HERE ON THE BOX--
"AGES 17 AND OLDER."
98
00:03:15,766 --> 00:03:17,296
OH, REALLY?
99
00:03:17,298 --> 00:03:18,198
THIS WOULD'VE BEEN
A GREAT THING FOR ME TO GET HIM.
100
00:03:18,198 --> 00:03:19,528
SO PUT BOTH OF OUR NAMES
ON IT.
101
00:03:19,530 --> 00:03:22,230
NO, NO. I NEED TO GET HIM
SOMETHING JUST FROM ME.
102
00:03:22,233 --> 00:03:23,833
FATHER TO SON.
103
00:03:23,834 --> 00:03:26,284
SOMETHING THAT SAYS,
"I KNOW YOU'RE A MAN NOW
104
00:03:26,277 --> 00:03:29,307
BECAUSE I, TOO, AM A MAN."
105
00:03:29,310 --> 00:03:30,740
UGH. WE NEED
MORE HAZELNUT CREAMER.
106
00:03:30,741 --> 00:03:33,211
AND NEXT TIME, CAN YOU GET
THE NONDAIRY STUFF?
107
00:03:33,213 --> 00:03:34,353
I'M SORRY, HONEY,
108
00:03:34,345 --> 00:03:36,785
BUT YOUR GRANDFATHER FOUGHT
IN WORLD WAR II,
109
00:03:36,787 --> 00:03:38,587
YOUR FATHER FOUGHT IN VIETNAM,
110
00:03:38,589 --> 00:03:42,289
BUT YOU PLAY VIDEO GAMES
AND USE POMEGRANATE BODY WASH.
111
00:03:42,293 --> 00:03:44,803
ARE YOU SAYING I'M NOT A MAN?
112
00:03:44,795 --> 00:03:47,795
YOU ARE MAN... ISH?
113
00:03:47,798 --> 00:03:50,598
NO, "MANNISH" IS WHAT
YOUR COUSIN STACEY IS.
114
00:03:50,601 --> 00:03:52,831
I AMALLMAN,
115
00:03:52,833 --> 00:03:56,443
AND IT IS MY JOB AS HIS FATHER
TO MAKE NATHAN A MAN.
116
00:03:56,437 --> 00:03:58,337
DAD! GUESS WHAT.
117
00:03:58,339 --> 00:04:00,569
SAMANTHA GUNNER JUST CALLED,
AND SHE SAID THAT SHE'S...
118
00:04:00,571 --> 00:04:03,241
(high-pitched singsong voice)
COMING TO MY PARTY TOMORROW!
119
00:04:04,715 --> 00:04:06,645
IT'S A WORK IN PROGRESS.
MM-HMM.
120
00:04:06,647 --> 00:04:08,247
(normal voice) THAT GIRL IS
A FIRECRACKER, DAD.
121
00:04:08,248 --> 00:04:09,418
WHAT DO I DO?
122
00:04:09,420 --> 00:04:10,580
LOOK...
123
00:04:10,581 --> 00:04:12,381
WE'RE GONNA HAVE A BOUNCE HOUSE
AT THE PARTY--
124
00:04:12,383 --> 00:04:14,333
YOU KNOW, FOR LUCY'S FRIENDS.
125
00:04:14,325 --> 00:04:16,785
A BOUNCE HOUSE IS LIKE
A 12-YEAR-OLD'S BACHELOR PAD--
126
00:04:16,787 --> 00:04:19,427
EVERYTHING'S SOFT,
THE LIGHTING'S EXOTIC.
127
00:04:19,430 --> 00:04:20,630
RIGHT.
MM.
128
00:04:20,631 --> 00:04:22,391
HEY!
(closes door)
129
00:04:22,393 --> 00:04:25,043
BRENDA CAN'T COME
TO NATHAN'S PARTY TOMORROW.
130
00:04:25,035 --> 00:04:26,835
OKAY, T.? WE'RE DIVORCED.
131
00:04:26,837 --> 00:04:28,367
I KNOW YOU'RE DIVORCED,
132
00:04:28,369 --> 00:04:29,699
BUT YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO
DEAL WITH IT LIKE AN ADULT.
133
00:04:29,700 --> 00:04:32,400
SHE'S MY BEST FRIEND.
YEAH, WELL, UM,
I'M YOUR BROTHER,
134
00:04:32,403 --> 00:04:33,473
AND BRENDA CAN'T COME TO THE--
135
00:04:33,474 --> 00:04:35,414
(Will) HEY! DA DA DA DA!
USE THE SUBSTITUTE, PLEASE.
136
00:04:35,406 --> 00:04:37,376
WHAT? I KNOW THE RULES.
137
00:04:37,378 --> 00:04:39,348
I WAS GONNA SAY "FLUFFIN'."
138
00:04:39,350 --> 00:04:42,450
CAN'T COME
TO THE FLUFFIN' PARTY.
139
00:04:42,453 --> 00:04:44,723
BRENDA IS NO LONGER
A PART OF THIS FAMILY.
140
00:04:44,715 --> 00:04:45,885
(singsongy) HELLO!
141
00:04:45,886 --> 00:04:47,056
(Lucy) AUNT BRENDA!
142
00:04:47,057 --> 00:04:50,487
(normal voice)
HI, EVERYBODY.
143
00:04:50,491 --> 00:04:51,661
AND KENNY.
144
00:04:51,662 --> 00:04:53,422
BRENDA, LISTEN.
145
00:04:53,424 --> 00:04:54,574
TOMORROW IS
NATHAN'S BIRTHDAY PARTY,
146
00:04:54,565 --> 00:04:56,495
AND WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO SET
SOME BOUNDARIES.
147
00:04:56,497 --> 00:04:59,367
I AGREE.
YOU SHOULDN'T BE THERE.
148
00:04:59,370 --> 00:05:01,300
(chuckles) VERYFUNNY.
149
00:05:01,301 --> 00:05:04,001
SO TOMORROW AT THE PARTY--
THE ONE I'M COMING TO?
150
00:05:04,004 --> 00:05:05,814
NO. TOMORROW--
WHEN I COME TO THE PARTY?
151
00:05:05,806 --> 00:05:07,976
NO, YOU'RE NOT--
GONNA MISS THAT PARTY?
152
00:05:07,978 --> 00:05:09,478
UGH!
153
00:05:09,480 --> 00:05:10,980
IT IS SO CUTE THE WAY YOU TWO
FINISH EACH OTHER'S SENTENCES.
154
00:05:10,981 --> 00:05:12,711
KENNY, CAN I HAVE A MINUTE?
155
00:05:12,713 --> 00:05:14,423
(mutters)
156
00:05:14,415 --> 00:05:16,015
(Will) AHEM.
(Kenny groans)
157
00:05:16,016 --> 00:05:17,686
(sighs)
158
00:05:17,688 --> 00:05:19,318
I SWEAR, WILL, SHE'S JUST DOING
THIS TO GET ARISEOUT OF ME.
159
00:05:19,319 --> 00:05:20,589
YEAH, WELL, IT'S WORKING.
160
00:05:20,591 --> 00:05:22,821
IF YOU FREAK OUT, SHE WINS.
161
00:05:22,823 --> 00:05:24,703
I MEAN, YOU GOTTA
PLAY IT COOL, MAN.
162
00:05:24,695 --> 00:05:26,595
I MEAN, JUST THINK OF
THE COOLEST GUY YOU CAN THINK OF
163
00:05:26,597 --> 00:05:27,757
AND ACT LIKE HIM.
164
00:05:27,758 --> 00:05:29,328
LIKE, WHO'S THE COOLEST GUY
IN THE WORLD?
165
00:05:29,329 --> 00:05:30,459
TOBEY MAGUIRE.
166
00:05:31,832 --> 00:05:34,842
UH--UH, YEAH. UH, ALL RIGHT.
OKAY. SURE. FINE.
167
00:05:34,835 --> 00:05:36,035
TOBEY MAGUIRE.
168
00:05:36,036 --> 00:05:39,466
SO JUST ASK YOURSELF,
"WHAT WOULD TOBEY MAGUIRE DO?"
169
00:05:39,470 --> 00:05:41,440
RIGHT.
170
00:05:41,442 --> 00:05:43,512
W.W.T.M.D.?
171
00:05:43,514 --> 00:05:44,484
ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT.
172
00:05:44,475 --> 00:05:45,645
GOOD.
173
00:05:45,646 --> 00:05:47,476
(laughs)
174
00:05:47,478 --> 00:05:49,348
HEY, B.
175
00:05:49,349 --> 00:05:52,479
IT'S TOTALLY COOL.
YOU CAN COME TO THE PARTY.
176
00:05:53,724 --> 00:05:55,734
I'M BRINGING A DATE.
177
00:05:55,726 --> 00:05:57,726
WHAT?!NO!
178
00:05:57,728 --> 00:06:00,128
ABSOLUTELY NOT. THAT'S IT.
179
00:06:00,130 --> 00:06:01,790
WILL, YOU'RE THE MAN
OF THIS HOUSE.
180
00:06:01,792 --> 00:06:03,462
YOU TELL HER
SHE CANNOT COME TO THIS PARTY.
181
00:06:03,464 --> 00:06:05,074
(sighs) OKAY. BRENDA...
182
00:06:07,968 --> 00:06:10,868
UH, THE PARTY STARTS AT 2:00,
AND DRESS IS CASUAL.
183
00:06:12,773 --> 00:06:14,553
THIS IS TOTALLY FLUFFED UP.
184
00:06:21,852 --> 00:06:23,812
(telephone ringing in distance)
185
00:06:23,814 --> 00:06:25,494
(knocks on door)
186
00:06:25,486 --> 00:06:27,656
MM. JEEZ.
I THOUGHT YOU WERE MY BOSS.
187
00:06:27,658 --> 00:06:29,418
WHAT, YOU LOOKING AT PORN?
188
00:06:29,420 --> 00:06:31,660
NO, I WAS LOOKING FOR A GIFT
FOR NATHAN.
189
00:06:31,662 --> 00:06:34,902
SO FAR, ALL I FOUND ARE
A SHOTGUN, A RUBBER RAFT,
190
00:06:34,895 --> 00:06:37,725
SOME GUY ON craigslist
WHO'S SELLING AN ALLIGATOR.
191
00:06:37,728 --> 00:06:39,128
MAN, YOU GET HIM
ANY OF THOSE THINGS AND A BEER,
192
00:06:39,129 --> 00:06:40,669
HE'LL BE VERY HAPPY.
193
00:06:40,671 --> 00:06:42,601
WAIT A MINUTE.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
194
00:06:42,603 --> 00:06:44,913
I FINISHED MY ROUTE EARLY.
LET'S GO GET LUNCH.
195
00:06:44,905 --> 00:06:46,035
IT'S 10:15.
196
00:06:46,036 --> 00:06:47,436
NORMALLY, I WORK A LOT LONGER,
197
00:06:47,438 --> 00:06:49,938
BUT THIS NEW PRODUCT,
FLAXIDORAL...
198
00:06:49,940 --> 00:06:51,610
(thud)
NOT A BIG HIT.
199
00:06:51,612 --> 00:06:53,042
WHAT DOES IT DO?
200
00:06:53,043 --> 00:06:54,793
FLAXIDORAL PROVIDES RELIEF
201
00:06:54,785 --> 00:06:58,615
FOR BACTERIAL INFECTIONS
OF THE SKIN AND SOFT TISSUE.
202
00:06:58,619 --> 00:07:01,449
SIDE EFFECTS INCLUDE
PANIC ATTACKS, LOOSE STOOL,
203
00:07:01,452 --> 00:07:02,622
NO STOOL.
204
00:07:02,623 --> 00:07:04,023
IT'S ALWAYS STOOL, ISN'T IT?
205
00:07:04,024 --> 00:07:05,834
HEY.
206
00:07:05,826 --> 00:07:06,856
♪ BLITZCRAIG! ♪
207
00:07:06,857 --> 00:07:09,027
IT'S THE ROBERTSON CLAIM.
MM.
208
00:07:09,029 --> 00:07:10,429
MR. ROSS SAYS
WE'RE NOT PAYING IT.
209
00:07:10,430 --> 00:07:11,730
IN FACT, WE'RE NOT PAYING
ANYTHING TODAY.
210
00:07:11,732 --> 00:07:12,802
THERE WAS A MEMO.
211
00:07:12,803 --> 00:07:14,033
THAT'S RIDICULOUS.
THEY CANCELED--
212
00:07:14,034 --> 00:07:15,644
WAIT. THERE'S MORE.
213
00:07:15,636 --> 00:07:17,666
LISA DIDN'T CALL ME BACK
LAST NIGHT.
214
00:07:17,668 --> 00:07:20,138
SO...
I'M GUESSING YOU CALLED...
215
00:07:20,140 --> 00:07:21,140
MM.
216
00:07:21,141 --> 00:07:22,711
SIX TIMES?
217
00:07:22,713 --> 00:07:25,023
ONCE... AT FIRST.
218
00:07:25,015 --> 00:07:26,815
AND THEN ONCE AGAIN, SO TWICE.
219
00:07:26,817 --> 00:07:27,977
(mouths word)
220
00:07:27,978 --> 00:07:29,548
AT FIRST, AND THEN WELL,
221
00:07:29,550 --> 00:07:31,080
YEAH, SIX--SIX TIMES.
(Kenny and Will) SIX TIMES.
222
00:07:31,081 --> 00:07:32,451
(sighs deeply)
223
00:07:32,452 --> 00:07:34,562
WHOA, MISTER.
224
00:07:34,555 --> 00:07:35,855
YOU GROWING A BEARD?
225
00:07:35,856 --> 00:07:37,656
NO, I FORGOT TO SHAVE.
226
00:07:37,658 --> 00:07:39,058
DIDN'T LISA USED TO
LIKE YOU WITH A LITTLE...
227
00:07:39,059 --> 00:07:40,589
WHO KNOWS? I DON'T KNOW?
WHAT IF SHE DID?
228
00:07:40,591 --> 00:07:42,061
IT'S NOT WHY I'M DOING IT.
229
00:07:42,062 --> 00:07:44,642
NO. NO, I WON'T HAVE THIS.
230
00:07:44,635 --> 00:07:46,995
A BEARD ISMYTHING.
YOU UNDERSTAND ME?
231
00:07:46,997 --> 00:07:48,597
I MUST INSIST
THAT YOU SHAVE IT.
232
00:07:48,599 --> 00:07:49,739
(scoffs) I'M SORRY, KENNY,
233
00:07:49,740 --> 00:07:52,070
BUT A PERSON CANNOT OWN A BEARD.
YOU SHAVE IT!
234
00:07:52,072 --> 00:07:54,552
THAT'S IT. THAT'S IT!
235
00:07:54,545 --> 00:07:56,745
I GOT IT, THE PERFECT GIFT
FOR NATHAN.
236
00:07:56,747 --> 00:07:57,907
YOU GOING WITH THE ALLIGATOR?
237
00:07:57,908 --> 00:07:59,178
I THOUGHT
WE WERE GRABBING LUNCH.
238
00:07:59,179 --> 00:08:00,979
DO YOU GUYS WEAR WATCHES?
IT'S 10:15.
239
00:08:05,956 --> 00:08:07,886
SO COME ON. TELL ME WHAT
YOU GOT HIM. IS IT A TRAMPOLINE?
240
00:08:07,888 --> 00:08:09,588
(scoffs) A TRAMPOLINE?
WE'LL BE LUCKY
241
00:08:09,590 --> 00:08:11,490
IF HE DOESN'T BREAK HIS LEG
IN THE BOUNCE HOUSE.
242
00:08:11,491 --> 00:08:13,121
OOH! IS IT THOSE MARACAS
HE'S BEEN WANTING?
243
00:08:13,123 --> 00:08:16,173
YEAH, BECAUSE, UH,
NOTHING SAYS "MAN" LIKE MARACAS.
244
00:08:16,166 --> 00:08:17,966
AND THEN
SHE STARTED REMINISCING
245
00:08:17,968 --> 00:08:19,728
ABOUT HOW I USED TO SING
"BROWN EYED GIRL"
246
00:08:19,730 --> 00:08:21,000
IN HER DORM ROOM.
247
00:08:21,001 --> 00:08:22,601
OHH. I LOVE THAT SONG.
248
00:08:22,603 --> 00:08:24,643
SHE'S GETTING MARRIEDTODAY,
249
00:08:24,635 --> 00:08:26,105
AND I DON'T THINK
SHE REALLY WANTS TO.
250
00:08:26,106 --> 00:08:27,906
THAT'S WHY
SHE NEEDED TO SEE ME.
251
00:08:27,908 --> 00:08:30,108
MM.
SO DO YOU THINK
I SHOULD DO SOMETHING?
252
00:08:30,110 --> 00:08:31,680
SHE WANTS ME TO DO SOMETHING,
RIGHT? I SHOULD DO SOMETHING.
253
00:08:31,682 --> 00:08:34,512
I SHOULD REACH OUT
AND I SHOULD DO SOMETHING.
254
00:08:34,514 --> 00:08:35,654
NO, CRAIG, I TOLD YOU.
255
00:08:35,646 --> 00:08:37,646
SHE'S JUST FEELING NOSTALGIC.
THAT'S ALL.
256
00:08:37,648 --> 00:08:40,848
OH, I TOTALLY DISAGREE. SHE
WANTS YOU YOU COME AFTER HER.
257
00:08:40,851 --> 00:08:42,691
YOU THINK?
(Will, Theresa, and Kenny) NO!
258
00:08:42,693 --> 00:08:44,123
YOU NUT BAG.
TOTALLY, CRAIG.
259
00:08:44,124 --> 00:08:46,264
I MEAN, THIS GIRL IS
YOUR SOUL MATE.
260
00:08:46,256 --> 00:08:47,826
YOU CAN'T LET HER GET AWAY.
261
00:08:47,828 --> 00:08:49,998
I MEAN, ONCE YOU REALIZE
THAT SOMEONE IS YOUR SOUL MATE,
262
00:08:50,000 --> 00:08:51,160
IT'S FOREVER.
263
00:08:51,161 --> 00:08:52,531
(scoffs)
264
00:08:52,532 --> 00:08:55,112
YOU SAIDIWAS YOUR SOUL MATE.
265
00:08:55,105 --> 00:08:58,165
MYSOUL MATE
WILL BE HERE ANY MINUTE,
266
00:08:58,168 --> 00:09:01,208
AND HE'S BRINGING LEMON BARS.
267
00:09:01,211 --> 00:09:02,811
OKAY.
268
00:09:02,813 --> 00:09:04,883
I CAN'T PROMISE THAT
THIS LITTLE BIRTHDAY PARTY
269
00:09:04,875 --> 00:09:06,715
ISN'T GONNA TURN INTO
AN ALL-OUT BLOODBATH!
270
00:09:06,717 --> 00:09:09,617
WAIT. HEY, HEY, HEY.
W.W.T.M.D.
271
00:09:09,620 --> 00:09:10,620
RIGHT.
OKAY?
272
00:09:10,621 --> 00:09:11,721
YOU'RE IN CHARGE.
273
00:09:11,722 --> 00:09:13,952
YES. (sighs) THANK YOU.
I'M IN CHARGE. RIGHT.
274
00:09:13,954 --> 00:09:16,894
THIS GUY'S JUST SOME LOSER.
HE'S NO THREAT TO ME.
275
00:09:16,887 --> 00:09:18,657
YEAH.
HE'S NOBODY. HE'S NOTHING.
276
00:09:18,659 --> 00:09:20,729
HE'S... AN UNDERWEAR MODEL.
277
00:09:20,731 --> 00:09:21,761
HI, FOLKS.
278
00:09:21,762 --> 00:09:23,832
THANKS FOR HAVING ME.
279
00:09:23,834 --> 00:09:26,674
BREND HAS TOLD ME SO MUCH
ABOUT ALL OF YOU.
280
00:09:26,667 --> 00:09:27,797
YOU MUST BE THERESA.
281
00:09:27,798 --> 00:09:29,968
OH. (giggles)
OH, YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE.
282
00:09:29,970 --> 00:09:31,240
THERE'S THE BIRTHDAY BOY!
283
00:09:31,241 --> 00:09:32,301
THANKS!
284
00:09:32,302 --> 00:09:35,112
YOU MUST BE WILL,
MAN OF THE HOUSE.
285
00:09:35,105 --> 00:09:37,205
IT'S A PLEASURE.
HELLO.
286
00:09:39,109 --> 00:09:41,809
AND YOU MUST BE KEN.
287
00:09:41,812 --> 00:09:44,282
THERE'S NO NEED
FOR THIS TO BE AWKWARD FOR US.
288
00:09:44,284 --> 00:09:46,224
I WANT YOU TO KNOW
THAT I RESPECT YOU.
289
00:09:46,216 --> 00:09:49,256
YOU AND BREND ARE CONNECTED.
I GET THAT.
290
00:09:49,259 --> 00:09:51,919
SO IF WE NEED TO CLEAR THE AIR,
THEN I SAY LET'S DO IT.
291
00:09:51,922 --> 00:09:56,332
AND THEN... LET'S GROW
TO BE CLOSE FRIENDS.
292
00:09:58,899 --> 00:10:01,169
WHATEVER, DUDE. (sighs)
293
00:10:01,171 --> 00:10:03,631
(children laughing)
294
00:10:03,634 --> 00:10:04,944
GOOD JOB.
295
00:10:07,177 --> 00:10:08,707
YOU'RE HANDLING THIS WELL.
296
00:10:08,709 --> 00:10:10,709
OF COURSE I AM.
I'M AN ADULT.
297
00:10:10,711 --> 00:10:11,941
AH!
(groans)
298
00:10:11,942 --> 00:10:13,112
THAT'S GOOD. I JUST THOUGHT
YOU'D BE INTIMIDATED
299
00:10:13,113 --> 00:10:16,223
BECAUSE
HE'S SO TALL AND HANDSOME.
300
00:10:16,216 --> 00:10:18,646
OH, HE'S GOOD AT BASKETBALL.
I'M GOOD AT BASKETBALL.
301
00:10:18,649 --> 00:10:19,819
HE'S BETTER.
302
00:10:19,820 --> 00:10:20,820
OHH! (chuckles)
303
00:10:20,821 --> 00:10:22,791
GRANT!
304
00:10:23,954 --> 00:10:25,734
THROW ME THE PILL.
305
00:10:25,726 --> 00:10:26,896
LITTLE ONE-ON-ONE. MM!
306
00:10:26,897 --> 00:10:28,157
OH, I'M SORRY.
IT'S ALL RIGHT.
307
00:10:28,158 --> 00:10:29,998
BEAT IT.
308
00:10:36,837 --> 00:10:38,337
WE'LL GO
WITH SHIRTS AND SKINS.
309
00:10:38,338 --> 00:10:40,138
THAT WAY, THERE'S NO CONFUSION
ABOUT WHO'S ON WHAT TEAM.
310
00:10:46,046 --> 00:10:48,846
(Kenny) THAT WAS A FOUL.
I'M NOT GONNA CALL IT...
311
00:10:48,849 --> 00:10:50,349
YOU'RE RIDICULOUS,
YOU KNOW THAT?
312
00:10:50,350 --> 00:10:51,880
'CAUSE I'M COOL LIKE THAT.
WHAT? WHAT AM I DOING?
313
00:10:51,882 --> 00:10:53,852
B., I HAVE KNOWN YOU
SINCE THE NINTH GRADE,
314
00:10:53,854 --> 00:10:54,994
AND EVEN THEN YOU WERE
PLAYING THESE STUPID GAMES,
315
00:10:54,985 --> 00:10:56,385
TRYING TO
MAKE MY BROTHER CRAZY.
316
00:10:56,386 --> 00:10:58,726
OH, THERESA.
(Kenny) IT'S ME.
317
00:10:58,729 --> 00:11:00,959
NO, GRANT'S A PART
OF MY LIFE NOW.
(ball hits backboard)
318
00:11:00,961 --> 00:11:02,291
THIS ISN'T ABOUT
MAKING KENNY JEALOUS.
319
00:11:02,292 --> 00:11:04,192
IT'S ABOUT ME MOVING ON
320
00:11:04,194 --> 00:11:05,804
AND FINDING A FUTURE
WITH THIS GUY.
321
00:11:05,796 --> 00:11:08,396
(panting) THAT'S TRAVELING,
AND ALSO YOU HURT ME.
322
00:11:08,398 --> 00:11:09,768
REALLY?
323
00:11:09,770 --> 00:11:12,100
WHAT'S HIS LAST NAME?
324
00:11:12,102 --> 00:11:13,142
PLEASE.
325
00:11:13,143 --> 00:11:14,913
DOES HE EVEN NEED ONE?
326
00:11:14,905 --> 00:11:16,845
THAT'S NOT FAIR. HE'S CHEATING.
I'M OUTTA HERE.
327
00:11:16,847 --> 00:11:19,147
KENNY? KENNY!
WHERE YOU GOING?
328
00:11:19,149 --> 00:11:21,809
AND PUT YOUR SHIRT BACK ON!
329
00:11:21,812 --> 00:11:24,412
IS IT A SLINGSHOT?
NOPE.
330
00:11:24,414 --> 00:11:26,464
IS IT A CHEMISTRY SET?
YOU'RE NEVER GONNA GUESS.
331
00:11:26,456 --> 00:11:28,886
IT'S SOMETHING THAT ONLY
A FATHER WOULD GIVE HIS SON,
332
00:11:28,889 --> 00:11:31,959
SOMETHING THAT
ONLY I WOULD GIVE NATHAN.
333
00:11:31,962 --> 00:11:35,432
DAD, GRANT GAVE ME
A SHAVING KIT!
334
00:11:38,799 --> 00:11:40,829
IS IT A SHAVING KIT?
335
00:11:40,831 --> 00:11:41,871
A SHAVING KIT.
336
00:11:41,872 --> 00:11:44,702
WHO GIVES A SHAVING KIT
TO A KID HE'S NEVER MET?
337
00:11:44,704 --> 00:11:47,314
A TOUCHY-FEELY JACKASS,
THAT'S WHO.
338
00:11:47,307 --> 00:11:49,307
OKAY, WE'RE GONNA HIT THE MALL.
KENNY, I NEED YOU IN DVDs.
339
00:11:49,309 --> 00:11:50,879
LOOK FOR CLASSICS,
340
00:11:50,881 --> 00:11:53,141
ANYTHING THAT SPEAKS TO
A BOY'S TRANSITION TO MANHOOD.
341
00:11:53,143 --> 00:11:54,713
NOTHING WITH BRENDAN FRASER.
342
00:11:54,714 --> 00:11:55,854
DUH.
343
00:11:55,846 --> 00:11:57,916
CRAIG, YOU AND I WILL HIT,
UH, MUSIC, GADGETS.
344
00:11:57,918 --> 00:11:59,988
(crying)
345
00:11:59,990 --> 00:12:01,990
(turns off engine)
346
00:12:01,992 --> 00:12:04,292
WHAT'S THE MATTER?
347
00:12:04,294 --> 00:12:06,804
I CAN'T TAKE IT.
I NEED CLOSURE.
348
00:12:06,797 --> 00:12:08,427
WHAT?
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
349
00:12:08,428 --> 00:12:10,728
CLOSURE! I NEED CLOSURE!
350
00:12:10,730 --> 00:12:12,900
YOU NEED TO CLOSURE VAGINA.
351
00:12:12,903 --> 00:12:14,913
(panting)
352
00:12:14,905 --> 00:12:16,235
IS THAT LISA'S CHURCH?
353
00:12:16,236 --> 00:12:17,936
I NEED TO SEE HER.
OH, MY GOD.
354
00:12:17,938 --> 00:12:18,908
OKAY, IF I JUST SEE HER
GETTING MARRIED,
355
00:12:18,909 --> 00:12:20,739
THEN MAYBE
I WILL HAVE CLOSURE.
356
00:12:20,740 --> 00:12:21,970
CRAIG, IF I'M NOT HOME
TO CUT THE CAKE IN 30 MINUTES,
357
00:12:21,972 --> 00:12:23,512
THERESA'S GONNA KILL ME.
358
00:12:23,513 --> 00:12:26,023
I KNOW. IT'LL TAKE TWO SECONDS.
I-I JUST--I NEED TO SEE HER.
359
00:12:26,016 --> 00:12:31,776
OKAY, FINE. GO. GO. JUST... GO.
GET YOUR--YOUR CLOSURE.
360
00:12:31,782 --> 00:12:34,122
(sighs)
361
00:12:34,124 --> 00:12:35,834
WHAT KIND OF A CAKE
ARE WE HAVING?
362
00:12:35,826 --> 00:12:36,956
IT'S FOR THE KIDS, KENNY.
363
00:12:36,957 --> 00:12:38,127
OKAY.
364
00:12:38,128 --> 00:12:40,828
OH, FLUFF ME!
HE'S GOT HIS GUITAR!
365
00:12:40,831 --> 00:12:42,061
(tuning guitar)
366
00:12:42,062 --> 00:12:44,972
(man) AND AS THESE TWO HEARTS
WANDER THROUGH THIS WORLD,
367
00:12:44,965 --> 00:12:47,865
MAY THEY EACH FIND THE COMFORT
OF GOD'S ETERNAL LOVE.
368
00:12:47,868 --> 00:12:49,068
(strums chord)
369
00:12:49,069 --> 00:12:52,939
♪ HEY, WHERE DID WE GO ♪
370
00:12:52,943 --> 00:12:56,283
♪ DAYS WHEN THE RAINS CAME? ♪
371
00:12:56,276 --> 00:12:59,776
♪ DOWN IN THE HOLLOW ♪
372
00:12:59,779 --> 00:13:03,979
♪ PLAYING A NEW GAME ♪
373
00:13:03,984 --> 00:13:07,124
♪ LAUGHIN' AND A-RUNNIN',
HEY, HEY ♪
374
00:13:07,117 --> 00:13:10,957
♪ SKIPPIN' AND A-JUMPIN' ♪
375
00:13:10,961 --> 00:13:13,421
♪ IN THE MISTY MORNIN' FOG ♪
376
00:13:13,423 --> 00:13:17,403
♪ WITH OUR HEARTS THUMPIN' ♪
377
00:13:17,397 --> 00:13:19,967
♪ AND YOU ♪
378
00:13:19,970 --> 00:13:22,230
♪ MY BROWN EYED GIRL ♪
379
00:13:25,505 --> 00:13:28,475
♪ YOU MY ♪
380
00:13:28,478 --> 00:13:31,508
♪ BROWN EYED GIRL ♪
381
00:13:31,511 --> 00:13:33,411
(Van Morrison)
♪ DO YOU REMEMBER WHEN ♪
382
00:13:33,413 --> 00:13:35,323
(Will) GO! GO, GO!
GO, GO, GO!
383
00:13:35,315 --> 00:13:37,015
COME ON.
384
00:13:37,017 --> 00:13:39,047
HOW DID I SOUND?
COME ON!
385
00:13:39,049 --> 00:13:41,049
♪ LA-LA, LA-LA TI DA ♪
386
00:13:41,051 --> 00:13:42,921
♪ JUST LIKE THAT ♪
387
00:13:42,923 --> 00:13:44,933
♪ SHA-LA-LA, LA-LA, LA-LA ♪
388
00:13:44,925 --> 00:13:46,195
♪ LA-LA, LA-LA TI DA ♪
389
00:13:46,196 --> 00:13:47,526
GO! COME ON!
390
00:13:47,527 --> 00:13:49,357
AAH!
391
00:13:49,359 --> 00:13:51,029
(Kenny groans) COME ON!
(panting) WILL?
WILL, THE DOORS. CAN'T OPEN.
392
00:13:51,031 --> 00:13:53,001
WILL, OPEN THE DOORS!
AAH!
393
00:13:53,003 --> 00:13:56,273
GO, GO, GO, GO! GO! GO! GO! GO!
(starts engine, tires peal)
394
00:13:56,266 --> 00:13:58,936
YOU'RE DEAD!
395
00:14:03,043 --> 00:14:05,423
♪ SHA-LA-LA, LA-LA, LA-LA,
LA-- ♪
396
00:14:05,415 --> 00:14:06,845
KENNY!
KENNY!
397
00:14:06,846 --> 00:14:07,946
CATCHY TUNE.
398
00:14:07,948 --> 00:14:10,118
THAT ACTUALLY JUST HAPPENED.
399
00:14:10,120 --> 00:14:13,120
YOU ACTUALLY JUST CRASHED
THAT WEDDING WITH A GUITAR.
400
00:14:13,123 --> 00:14:14,483
I MEAN, WHO DOES THAT?
401
00:14:14,484 --> 00:14:16,464
BRENDA SAID
LISA WANTED ME TO STOP IT!
402
00:14:16,456 --> 00:14:18,026
OH, YOU LISTEN TO BRENDA?
403
00:14:18,028 --> 00:14:21,028
WELL, NEED I REMIND YOU, THIS IS
A WOMAN WHO MARRIED KENNY.
404
00:14:21,031 --> 00:14:26,301
♪ SHA-LA-LA, LA-LA, LA-LA,
LA-LA, DA DOO-- ♪
405
00:14:26,296 --> 00:14:29,066
(voice breaks) I LOVE HER, WILL.
I LOVE HER SO MUCH.
406
00:14:29,069 --> 00:14:30,439
YOU KNOW WHO ELSE LOVES HER?
407
00:14:30,440 --> 00:14:32,140
THE GUY FOLLOWING US
408
00:14:32,142 --> 00:14:34,302
IN THE BLACK LIMOUSINE
WITH THE CANS TIED TO IT.
409
00:14:34,304 --> 00:14:37,154
OH! OH, MY GOD!
410
00:14:37,147 --> 00:14:39,977
PILATES CHANGED MY LIFE, LADIES.
411
00:14:39,980 --> 00:14:42,510
I SLEEP BETTER, I HAVE
MORE ENERGY AT THE OFFICE...
412
00:14:42,512 --> 00:14:44,082
AND IN THE BEDROOM.
413
00:14:45,115 --> 00:14:48,015
(laughs) NO, I'M KIDDING.
414
00:14:48,018 --> 00:14:50,018
OR AM I?
415
00:14:50,020 --> 00:14:51,990
(tires screech)
416
00:14:56,566 --> 00:14:58,366
(Will) OKAY, EVERYBODY!
417
00:14:58,368 --> 00:15:00,298
WE'RE GONNA CUT THE CAKE,
SO LET'S GET IN THE HOUSE.
418
00:15:00,300 --> 00:15:01,500
WE GOT A SITUATION OVER HERE!
419
00:15:01,501 --> 00:15:03,201
NO, NO, NO.
THERE'S NO SITUATION.
420
00:15:03,203 --> 00:15:06,043
WE JUST NEED EVERYBODY
IN THE HOUSE. EVERYONE...
421
00:15:06,036 --> 00:15:07,206
DAD, DAD.
GO IN THE HOUSE.
422
00:15:07,207 --> 00:15:09,277
SAMANTHA NEEDS THIS TAG
CUT OFF HER CAP.
423
00:15:09,279 --> 00:15:10,479
USE THE OLD MOHASKA.
424
00:15:10,480 --> 00:15:12,080
THAT'S MY DAD'S KNIFE.
(click)
425
00:15:12,082 --> 00:15:14,082
THANKS, MR. KEEN.
426
00:15:14,084 --> 00:15:15,054
(click)
427
00:15:15,045 --> 00:15:16,145
SO NATHAN TELLS ME
YOU SELL INSURANCE.
428
00:15:16,146 --> 00:15:17,916
UH, YES, I DO. I DO.
429
00:15:17,917 --> 00:15:19,547
BUT RIGHT NOW WE'RE GONNA
GO IN THE HOUSE. OKAY.
OH, OKAY.
430
00:15:19,549 --> 00:15:21,049
YEAH.
431
00:15:21,051 --> 00:15:22,221
HONEY, WHAT'S GOING ON?
432
00:15:22,222 --> 00:15:23,392
NOTHING. EVERYTHING'S FINE.
433
00:15:23,393 --> 00:15:25,663
(brakes screech, crash)
434
00:15:27,097 --> 00:15:29,997
OKAY, LET'S CUT THE CAKE.
435
00:15:30,000 --> 00:15:31,130
(sighs)
WHAT...
436
00:15:31,131 --> 00:15:32,461
ALL RIGHT, COME ON.
437
00:15:32,462 --> 00:15:35,042
THEY...
IT'S ALL RIGHT.
438
00:15:36,436 --> 00:15:37,436
(glass shatters)
439
00:15:37,437 --> 00:15:39,107
BRING OUT THE BROWN EYED GIRL!
440
00:15:39,109 --> 00:15:40,969
THIS IS BAD.
441
00:15:40,971 --> 00:15:43,071
NO, THIS VERY BAD.
442
00:15:43,073 --> 00:15:44,713
CAN YOU SEE IF HE'S WEARING
A WEDDING RING?
443
00:15:44,714 --> 00:15:48,154
'CAUSE IF HE'S NOT,
LISA'S STILL SINGLE.
444
00:15:48,148 --> 00:15:49,648
THIS IS EXCITING.
445
00:15:49,649 --> 00:15:52,119
ARE YOU INSANE?
446
00:15:52,122 --> 00:15:54,152
WILL, SWEETHEART,
WHAT'S HAPPENING NOW?
447
00:15:54,154 --> 00:15:56,464
WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE,
THAT'S WHAT'S HAPPENING NOW.
448
00:15:56,456 --> 00:15:59,186
CRAIG, GO OUT
AND GIVE YOURSELF UP.
449
00:15:59,189 --> 00:16:02,429
UH, NO, THANK YOU, KENNY.
I'M CALLING THE POLICE.
450
00:16:02,432 --> 00:16:04,162
(dialing)
DAD?
451
00:16:09,269 --> 00:16:11,269
UM, HELLO. WE HAVE
A BIT OF A SITUATION HERE.
452
00:16:11,271 --> 00:16:13,241
MY--
NO.
453
00:16:13,243 --> 00:16:15,453
(cell phone clatters)
WE'RE NOT CALLING
THE POLICE.
454
00:16:15,445 --> 00:16:17,245
YOU THINK OUR FATHERS
WOULD'VE CALLED THE POLICE?
455
00:16:17,247 --> 00:16:19,277
NO. THEY WOULD BE
OUT ON THE LAWN RIGHT NOW.
456
00:16:19,279 --> 00:16:20,509
THEY WOULDN'T
BE SINGING IN CHURCHES
457
00:16:20,510 --> 00:16:23,080
OR--OR SEARCHING
FOR SPECIAL BIRTHDAY GIFTS.
458
00:16:23,083 --> 00:16:25,423
THEY WERE MEN,REALMEN--
459
00:16:25,415 --> 00:16:28,185
NOT THE OVER-EVOLVED GENERATION
OF PANTYWAISTS
460
00:16:28,188 --> 00:16:29,988
THAT WE'VE BECOME.
461
00:16:29,989 --> 00:16:31,219
IT'S TIME TO MAN UP!
462
00:16:31,221 --> 00:16:32,361
CRAIG?
463
00:16:32,362 --> 00:16:34,162
IF I HAVE TO FIGHT FOR LISA,
I'LL FIGHT FOR LISA.
464
00:16:34,164 --> 00:16:36,174
GOOD. KENNY?
465
00:16:36,166 --> 00:16:38,466
I AM TOBEY FLUFFIN' MAGUIRE.
466
00:16:38,468 --> 00:16:39,768
WHAT?
467
00:16:39,769 --> 00:16:42,169
OKAY, CRAIG, STAY ON THE PORCH,
KEEP AN EYE ON THE LIMO.
468
00:16:42,172 --> 00:16:44,732
KENNY, GO THROUGH THE GARAGE,
GET NATHAN'S HOCKEY STICK,
469
00:16:44,734 --> 00:16:46,544
AND COVER MY FLANK
ON THE DRIVEWAY.
470
00:16:46,536 --> 00:16:48,076
AYE, AYE, SKIPPER.
GOOD.
471
00:16:48,078 --> 00:16:49,208
WHAT DO I DO, WILL?
472
00:16:49,209 --> 00:16:51,639
NO. NO!
WILL, HE IS NOT ON THIS TEAM.
473
00:16:51,641 --> 00:16:53,581
KENNY, IS THIS ABOUT
THE BASKETBALL GAME?
474
00:16:53,583 --> 00:16:55,523
JUST STAY ON THE PORCH
WITH CRAIG.
475
00:16:55,515 --> 00:16:56,645
DON'T WORRY.
476
00:16:56,646 --> 00:16:59,146
I'M GONNA DO SOMETHING COOL.
477
00:16:59,149 --> 00:17:02,219
NO, NO, GRANT,
DON'T DO ANYTHING.
I GET IT.
478
00:17:02,222 --> 00:17:04,622
NO, DON'T "GET" ANYTHING.
THERE'S NOTHING TO GET.
479
00:17:04,624 --> 00:17:07,034
(whispers) GOT IT.
480
00:17:10,660 --> 00:17:12,160
ALL RIGHT.
481
00:17:17,507 --> 00:17:18,707
HEY, FELLAS.
482
00:17:18,708 --> 00:17:20,468
(wind whistles, bird cries)
483
00:17:20,470 --> 00:17:22,610
MIND PUTTING UP THE FLAG
ON THE MAILBOX?
484
00:17:22,612 --> 00:17:24,212
I GOT A LETTER GOING OUT.
485
00:17:24,214 --> 00:17:25,654
WE WANT HIM.
486
00:17:28,348 --> 00:17:30,048
YOU CAN'T HAVE HIM.
487
00:17:32,482 --> 00:17:34,622
HOCKEY STICK. HOCKEY STICK.
488
00:17:34,624 --> 00:17:36,334
HOCKEY STICK. HOCKEY--
489
00:17:36,326 --> 00:17:38,256
HOW DO THEY FIND ANYTHING
IN THIS MESS?!
490
00:17:38,258 --> 00:17:41,058
LOOK, UH,
491
00:17:41,060 --> 00:17:44,090
YOU GUYS--YOU GUYS DON'T
WANNA DO THIS, ALL RIGHT?
492
00:17:44,094 --> 00:17:45,344
(bird cries)
493
00:17:48,138 --> 00:17:50,098
(slapping pogo stick)
494
00:17:50,100 --> 00:17:52,500
YOU NEED TO CLEAN
YOUR GARAGE.
495
00:17:52,502 --> 00:17:55,612
HE RUINED MY WEDDING,
AND WE'RE GONNA KICK HIS ASS!
496
00:17:57,076 --> 00:17:59,546
CAN'T LET YOU DO THAT.
497
00:18:04,254 --> 00:18:07,694
BARRACUDA!
498
00:18:07,687 --> 00:18:09,687
UHH!
OH!
499
00:18:09,689 --> 00:18:10,859
OH!
500
00:18:10,860 --> 00:18:13,760
(Grant grunting,
punches landing)
501
00:18:16,196 --> 00:18:17,666
DUDE!
(Craig and Kenny laugh)
502
00:18:17,667 --> 00:18:19,197
THAT WAS INTENSE.
503
00:18:19,199 --> 00:18:20,599
DUDE, YOU WERE LIKE
A JEDI KNIGHT...
504
00:18:20,600 --> 00:18:22,530
WITH A POGO STICK.
505
00:18:22,532 --> 00:18:25,642
AND YOU WERE FREAKING EVERYBODY
OUT WITH THAT NEW BEARD.
506
00:18:25,635 --> 00:18:26,775
(laughs)
507
00:18:26,776 --> 00:18:27,836
I'M GONNA SHAVE IT.
508
00:18:27,837 --> 00:18:29,207
DAMN STRAIGHT.
509
00:18:29,209 --> 00:18:30,479
OUR FATHERS WOULD BE PROUD.
510
00:18:30,480 --> 00:18:33,140
TOBEY MAGUIRE WOULD BE PROUD.
511
00:18:33,143 --> 00:18:35,423
WELL, I'LL REMIND YOU GUYS
THAT GRANT WAS THE ONLY ONE
512
00:18:35,415 --> 00:18:37,885
WHO ACTUALLY
GOT INTO A FIGHT TONIGHT.
513
00:18:37,887 --> 00:18:39,247
THAT'S WHY HE WAS
THE ONLY ONE ARRESTED
514
00:18:39,249 --> 00:18:40,449
WHEN THE COPS SHOWED UP.
515
00:18:40,450 --> 00:18:43,620
UH, NO. UH, GRANT WAS ARRESTED
BECAUSE HE LOST HIS COOL.
516
00:18:43,623 --> 00:18:45,233
MM-HMM.
WE WERE ROCK STEADY.
517
00:18:45,225 --> 00:18:47,795
YO, ROCK STEADY, GRAB YOUR KEYS.
WE'RE GOIN'.
518
00:18:47,797 --> 00:18:50,357
YES, MILADY,
IWILLTAKE YOU HOME.
519
00:18:50,360 --> 00:18:52,360
(singsongy) HELLO!
520
00:18:52,362 --> 00:18:53,702
(laughs) OH, NO, MY LIEGE.
521
00:18:53,703 --> 00:18:55,373
YOU'RE TAKING ME
TO THE POLICE STATION
522
00:18:55,365 --> 00:18:56,665
TO BAIL OUT GRANT.
523
00:18:56,666 --> 00:18:59,366
WHAT?!NO. NO WAY.
524
00:18:59,369 --> 00:19:02,539
AND BRING YOUR A.T.M. CARD.
WE NEED BAIL MONEY.
525
00:19:02,542 --> 00:19:06,482
FINE! BUT I'M NOT TAKING OUT
ANY MORE THAN $300!
(door opens)
526
00:19:08,518 --> 00:19:09,878
(door closes)
527
00:19:09,879 --> 00:19:12,349
YOU THINK LISA MIGHT BE UPSET
ABOUT WHAT I DID TODAY?
528
00:19:12,352 --> 00:19:13,922
YOU MEAN THAT
YOU DESTROYED HER WEDDING,
529
00:19:13,923 --> 00:19:15,733
RUINED THE MOST IMPORTANT DAY
OF HER LIFE,
530
00:19:15,725 --> 00:19:18,455
AND EMBARRASSED HER IN FRONT
OF EVERYONE SHE LOVES?
531
00:19:18,458 --> 00:19:20,288
YEAH, THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT.
532
00:19:20,290 --> 00:19:21,430
HONEY, LISTEN--
533
00:19:21,431 --> 00:19:23,191
I KNOW, I KNOW.
534
00:19:23,193 --> 00:19:25,403
I SHOULD CALL HER.
535
00:19:25,395 --> 00:19:26,535
(chuckles)
536
00:19:28,438 --> 00:19:31,268
DID YOU HAVE A GOOD BIRTHDAY?
537
00:19:31,271 --> 00:19:33,571
IT WASTHEBEST DAY
OF MY LIFE.
538
00:19:33,573 --> 00:19:34,843
THE PARTY, THE FIGHT...
539
00:19:34,844 --> 00:19:36,454
GUESS WHAT.
540
00:19:36,446 --> 00:19:38,346
I KISSED SAMANTHA
IN THE BOUNCE HOUSE.
541
00:19:38,348 --> 00:19:40,308
THAT'S GREAT.
542
00:19:42,382 --> 00:19:45,622
LOOK, UM,
ABOUT YOUR BIRTHDAY GIFT...
543
00:19:45,615 --> 00:19:47,415
I WANTED TO GET YOU
SOMETHING SPECIAL.
544
00:19:47,417 --> 00:19:49,487
OH, YEAH. I KNOW. MOM GAVE IT
TO ME, AND I LOVE IT.
545
00:19:49,489 --> 00:19:51,919
I MEAN, I KNOW
IT'S VIOLENT AND SCARY,
546
00:19:51,921 --> 00:19:53,421
BUT I THINK I'M OLD ENOUGH
FOR IT NOW.
547
00:19:55,425 --> 00:19:58,195
(speaks indistinctly)
548
00:19:58,197 --> 00:20:00,297
(sighs)
549
00:20:03,473 --> 00:20:06,543
I THINK YOU'RE OLD ENOUGH
FOR SOMETHING ELSE NOW, TOO.
550
00:20:09,409 --> 00:20:12,209
ARE YOU SERIOUS?
THE OLD MOHASKA?
551
00:20:12,211 --> 00:20:13,611
EVERY MAN SHOULD HAVE ONE.
552
00:20:13,613 --> 00:20:15,423
THANKS, DAD!
553
00:20:15,415 --> 00:20:16,585
(chuckles)
554
00:20:18,418 --> 00:20:20,418
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, NATE.
555
00:20:26,326 --> 00:20:29,496
OH, I KNOW.
I'M A FANTASTIC FATHER.
556
00:20:29,499 --> 00:20:30,899
IT WAS THE PERFECT GIFT.
557
00:20:30,900 --> 00:20:33,660
YOU JUST GAVE A 13-YEAR-OLD BOY
A RAZOR-SHARP KNIFE.
558
00:20:33,663 --> 00:20:37,513
THERESA, MY FATHER GAVE ME THAT
KNIFE WHEN I WAS NATHAN'S AGE.
559
00:20:37,507 --> 00:20:39,867
I'VE HAD IT FOR 20 YEARS,
AND I HAVE NEVER EVEN HAD--
560
00:20:39,869 --> 00:20:41,339
(Nathan) OW!
561
00:20:41,341 --> 00:20:43,611
MOMMY! I'M BLEEDING!
562
00:20:43,613 --> 00:20:46,523
UN-FLUFFIN'-BELIEVABLE.
563
00:20:50,650 --> 00:20:51,980
(gunfire)
MAN, GRANT REALLY TOOK IT
TO ANOTHER LEVEL
564
00:20:51,981 --> 00:20:53,521
WITH THAT BARRACUDA THING.
(laughs)
565
00:20:53,523 --> 00:20:54,653
Apparently, the key
to summoning up your courage
566
00:20:54,654 --> 00:20:57,564
IS YELLING OUT THE NAME
OF SOME RANDOM FISH.
567
00:20:57,557 --> 00:20:59,427
ORANGE ROUGHY!
568
00:20:59,429 --> 00:21:00,989
MAHIMAHI!
569
00:21:00,990 --> 00:21:02,690
MACKEREL!
570
00:21:02,692 --> 00:21:04,732
STURGEON!
571
00:21:04,734 --> 00:21:06,604
COME ON, CRAIG.
GET IN ON THIS WASTE OF TIME.
572
00:21:06,596 --> 00:21:07,936
NAH, I'M NOT IN THE MOOD.
573
00:21:07,937 --> 00:21:09,997
CRAIG.
COME ON.
574
00:21:09,999 --> 00:21:11,669
Come on, say a fish.
575
00:21:11,671 --> 00:21:13,301
CRAIG, YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO.
576
00:21:13,303 --> 00:21:15,453
JUST SAY A FISH.
You know you want to, Craig!
577
00:21:15,445 --> 00:21:17,375
Come on, Craig!
Say a fish.
578
00:21:17,377 --> 00:21:18,777
COME ON, CRAIG!
THAT'S AN ORDER!
You know you want to.
Name a fish.
579
00:21:18,778 --> 00:21:20,508
Do it!
580
00:21:20,510 --> 00:21:21,850
DOLPHIN!
581
00:21:21,851 --> 00:21:22,951
YEAH!
Yeah!
582
00:21:22,952 --> 00:21:25,592
(laughs)
583
00:21:25,585 --> 00:21:26,555
DOLPHIN'S NOT A FISH.
584
00:21:26,556 --> 00:21:32,416
IT'S A MAMMAL.
YOU LOSE.
41282
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