Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,961 --> 00:00:03,881
♪♪♪
2
00:00:03,884 --> 00:00:07,094
MY DEAR BROTHERS AND SISTER
OF THE ORANGE AND WHITE,
3
00:00:07,088 --> 00:00:09,048
TODAY IS A MOMENTOUS DAY INDEED,
BECAUSE TODAY
4
00:00:09,050 --> 00:00:13,130
WE LIBERATE A WALL SAFE
FROM THE APARTMENT OF ONE...
5
00:00:13,134 --> 00:00:15,644
MR. RAYMOND ROMANUS.
ROMANO.
6
00:00:15,636 --> 00:00:17,636
NAH, I'M PRETTY SURE
IT'S "ROMANUS."
7
00:00:17,638 --> 00:00:20,768
"ROMANO" A TYPE OF CHEESE.
8
00:00:20,771 --> 00:00:23,771
THIS KEY IS TO THE APARTMENT
NEXT DOOR TO RAYMOND'S.
9
00:00:23,774 --> 00:00:27,414
WE WILL STAY IN SAID APARTMENT
UNTIL RAY GOES OUT.
10
00:00:27,408 --> 00:00:29,318
WE SHALL CUT THROUGH
THE WALL,
11
00:00:29,320 --> 00:00:31,650
REMOVE HIS SAFE
AND REPLACE IT WITH...
12
00:00:31,652 --> 00:00:34,082
THIS IDENTICAL SAFE
WHICH IS RIGGED TO OPEN
13
00:00:34,075 --> 00:00:36,245
NO MATTER WHAT COMBINATION
YOU TRY.
14
00:00:36,247 --> 00:00:39,287
THIS WAY, RAY WILL NEVER REALIZE
IT AIN'T HIS SAFE.
15
00:00:39,290 --> 00:00:42,500
GENIUS. GENIUS!
IT WAS YOUR IDEA.
16
00:00:42,503 --> 00:00:45,803
OBVIOUSLY.
WHEN HE DOES OPEN THAT SAFE,
HE WILL FIND...
17
00:00:45,796 --> 00:00:50,296
THIS 12-KARAT RING MADE
WITH A ZIRCONIA THAT IS CUBIC.
18
00:00:50,301 --> 00:00:52,301
WHILE WE HAVE HIS SAFE
AND INSIDE OF IT,
19
00:00:52,303 --> 00:00:55,393
THE $1.5 MILLION DIAMOND
WHICH WILL BE OURS,
20
00:00:55,386 --> 00:00:59,266
AND HE WILL NEVER KNOW
THE DIFFERENCE!
(all cheering)
21
00:00:59,270 --> 00:01:01,270
YEAH!
(Eugene) I LIKE IT!
22
00:01:01,272 --> 00:01:05,192
(Rockefeller) YEAH!
AND WHILE WE ARE IN RAY ROMANO'S
BUILDING, WE WILL BE WEARING...
23
00:01:05,186 --> 00:01:07,526
PANTS?
24
00:01:07,528 --> 00:01:11,108
DISGUISES. I'VE BEEN WORKING
ON THIS FOR WEEKS.
25
00:01:11,112 --> 00:01:13,112
THIS IS THE OFFICIAL
26
00:01:13,114 --> 00:01:15,704
KNIGHTS OF PROSPERITY
DISGUISE KIT.
(Eugene) THAT'S AWESOME.
27
00:01:15,696 --> 00:01:18,696
UH, IT'S JUST--WE'RE GOING
TO BE GOING AS OURSELVES,
28
00:01:18,699 --> 00:01:20,959
SO THERE'S REALLY
NO NEED FOR A DISGUISE KIT,
29
00:01:20,961 --> 00:01:22,961
BUT THANK YOU VERY MUCH,
LOUIS.
30
00:01:22,963 --> 00:01:26,133
I THINK YOU MEAN "THANK YOU
VERY MUCH, GOURISHANKAR."
31
00:01:35,095 --> 00:01:36,765
(whispering) COME ON IN.
32
00:01:36,767 --> 00:01:40,017
ALL RIGHT.
WE GOTTA BE QUIET, GUYS.
33
00:01:40,020 --> 00:01:43,020
NOW... THE SAFE'S
IN THAT WALL OVER THERE.
34
00:01:43,023 --> 00:01:45,033
HERE'S WHAT I NEED.
35
00:01:45,025 --> 00:01:47,725
GARY, LOUIS, MAKE ME
A SPY HOLE RIGHT THERE
36
00:01:47,728 --> 00:01:51,108
SO WE CAN KEEP TABS
ON WHAT RAY'S UP TO, OKAY?
37
00:01:52,823 --> 00:01:56,003
FIRE UP
THAT METAL DETECTOR.
(electronic squeal)
38
00:01:55,996 --> 00:01:59,156
YOU KNOW, IN THE 20 YEARS
I'VE OWNED THIS THING,
39
00:01:59,160 --> 00:02:01,080
I THINK I'VE FOUND
A TOTAL OF 48 CENTS.
40
00:02:02,293 --> 00:02:04,123
(rapid beeping)
41
00:02:04,124 --> 00:02:06,514
(laughs) MAKE THAT
$1.5 MILLION AND 48 CENTS.
42
00:02:06,507 --> 00:02:09,207
YES! HOW'S THAT PEEPHOLE
COMING ALONG?
43
00:02:09,210 --> 00:02:10,670
READY FOR PEEPING.
44
00:02:10,671 --> 00:02:13,011
THIS IS TREMENDOUS.
45
00:02:13,013 --> 00:02:15,103
IT IS LIKE HAVING OUR OWN
PRIVATE COMMAND PERFORMANCE
46
00:02:15,095 --> 00:02:16,465
OF EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMOND."
47
00:02:16,467 --> 00:02:19,217
YOU KNOW, WE HAVE A VERSION
OF THE SHOW IN INDIA.
48
00:02:19,220 --> 00:02:21,220
IT IS CALLED "EVERYBODY LOVES
RAKESH SURAMPUDI,"
49
00:02:21,222 --> 00:02:25,072
BUT IN OUR VERSION, THE GIGANTIC
BROTHER IS NOT A POLICEMAN.
50
00:02:25,065 --> 00:02:28,025
HE'S AN INDIAN POLICEMAN.
WOULD YOU DO IT ALREADY?
LOOK!
51
00:02:28,028 --> 00:02:29,398
ENTERTAIN ME,
MY LITTLE MONKEY.
52
00:02:29,400 --> 00:02:31,030
(Gary)
DANCE FOR ME. DANCE.
53
00:02:31,031 --> 00:02:33,321
(man calling play-by-play
on TV)
54
00:02:33,324 --> 00:02:36,834
WELL?
IT'S NOT
A PARTICULARLY STRONG EPISODE.
55
00:02:36,827 --> 00:02:38,827
I FIND MYSELF MISSING
DORIS ROBERTS.
56
00:02:38,829 --> 00:02:40,739
MOVE! MOVE!
57
00:02:43,123 --> 00:02:45,133
(Eugene) LOOKS LIKE
HE'S FINISHING HIS LUNCH.
AHH.
58
00:02:45,125 --> 00:02:47,705
HE'S GOT TO GO OUT SOON.
(can drops)
59
00:02:47,708 --> 00:02:51,458
WHAT WE HAVE TO DO NOW
IS JUST CHILL OUT AND WAIT.
(Squatch)
BECAUSE IN A FEW MINUTES,
60
00:02:51,462 --> 00:02:53,962
WE'RE GONNA BE MILLIONAIRES.
(Rockefeller) HELL, YEAH.
61
00:02:53,964 --> 00:02:56,184
(Gary) IT'S SO GREAT.
I'M SO EXCITED.
62
00:02:58,389 --> 00:03:01,059
(TV continues playing)
63
00:03:01,061 --> 00:03:03,221
(Esperanza) SIX DAYS.
64
00:03:03,224 --> 00:03:06,864
FOR SIX DAYS HE DOES NOTHING
BUT SIT ON A COUCH, GET DRUNK
65
00:03:06,857 --> 00:03:09,227
AND WATCH
TELEVISION SPORTING EVENTS!
66
00:03:09,230 --> 00:03:11,440
ALL RIGHT. THERE'S ONLY
ONE THING LEFT TO DO.
67
00:03:11,442 --> 00:03:13,982
WE GOTTA CUT OFF
HIS LIFELINE.
68
00:03:13,984 --> 00:03:17,874
AAH! I GOT IT.
69
00:03:17,868 --> 00:03:21,028
(grunts) I'M PRETTY SURE
THIS IS HIS CABLE.
70
00:03:21,031 --> 00:03:22,911
(Eugene) EXCELLENT JOB,
SQUATCH. WIRE CUTTERS.
71
00:03:22,913 --> 00:03:26,423
GOOD. GOOD. GOOD. OKAY.
OKAY. GOOD. YEAH.
72
00:03:28,289 --> 00:03:32,089
COME ON!
73
00:03:32,092 --> 00:03:34,892
HE IS OFF THE COUCH.
LIKE LAZARUS, HE HAS RISEN!
74
00:03:34,885 --> 00:03:37,385
(Gary)
IT IS A MIRACLE!
75
00:03:38,799 --> 00:03:40,889
HE PUTTIN' HIS PANTS ON.
THANK YOU, JESUS!
76
00:03:40,891 --> 00:03:43,841
OKAY, EVERYBODY GRAB A TOOL.
LET'S STEAL US A SAFE.
77
00:03:43,844 --> 00:03:45,064
(Rockefeller) YEAH.
78
00:03:47,268 --> 00:03:49,398
OOH.
HE'S WALKING OUT THE DOOR.
79
00:03:51,272 --> 00:03:53,402
ELVIS HAS LEFT THE--
(knock on door)
80
00:03:53,404 --> 00:03:56,244
AY, DIOS MíO.
81
00:04:04,325 --> 00:04:06,415
HE'S HERE.
MAARE GAYE!
82
00:04:08,208 --> 00:04:10,248
(knocks on door)
83
00:04:20,931 --> 00:04:23,341
YOU GUYS HIDE IN THE BATHROOM.
I'LL GET RID OF IT.
84
00:04:23,344 --> 00:04:27,394
NO, LET ME DO IT.
IT'S MY TURN TO STEP UP.
NO, NO, NO, NO.
I CAN TAKE CARE OF MYSELF.
85
00:04:27,388 --> 00:04:29,518
HE MET YOU WITH KELLY RIPA.
(Esperanza) YEAH.
86
00:04:29,520 --> 00:04:31,020
DAMN IT. YOU'RE RIGHT.
87
00:04:31,021 --> 00:04:33,481
LOUIS, GET ME ONE
OF THOSE DISGUISES. COME ON.
88
00:04:33,484 --> 00:04:35,494
OH, NOW YOU NEED
LOUIS' DISGUISE KIT.
89
00:04:35,486 --> 00:04:38,606
FASCINATING HOW THE WORM TURNS,
IS IT NOT, GENTLEMEN?
90
00:04:38,609 --> 00:04:40,819
PLEASE DON'T MAKE ME
KICK YOUR ASS.
91
00:04:40,821 --> 00:04:42,741
COME ON.
92
00:04:42,743 --> 00:04:44,793
(knock on door)
93
00:04:46,036 --> 00:04:48,286
(Russian accent) HELLO.
94
00:04:48,288 --> 00:04:51,078
I'M NIKOLAI
VINITZIKOV-ISTAN-OVICH-SKI.
95
00:04:51,081 --> 00:04:53,081
YES.
OH. (chuckles)
96
00:04:53,083 --> 00:04:57,013
THERE'S THE HANDSHAKE
FROM A STRANGER. ALL RIGHT.
97
00:04:57,007 --> 00:04:58,837
OH! OH, WAIT MINUTE!
98
00:04:58,839 --> 00:05:00,589
YOU ARE BOB SAGETS!
99
00:05:00,591 --> 00:05:02,801
YOU HAVE FUNNY SHOW
ABOUT VIDEOS WITH FAT PEOPLE
100
00:05:02,803 --> 00:05:05,983
GETTING HIT IN SCROTUM
ALL THE TIME WITH THE BASEBALLS!
101
00:05:05,976 --> 00:05:07,976
YES!
VERY POPULAR IN MY COUNTRY!
102
00:05:07,978 --> 00:05:09,348
THAT'S ME, BOB SAGETS.
103
00:05:09,350 --> 00:05:12,850
LISTEN, UH, MY TV WENT DEAD,
AND I'M WATCHING A HOCKEY GAME.
104
00:05:12,853 --> 00:05:15,863
I GOT A BET ON IT. COULD I
WATCH THE THIRD PERIOD HERE?
105
00:05:15,856 --> 00:05:17,606
HERE?
YEAH.
106
00:05:17,608 --> 00:05:20,858
OH, AH, NO, NO. SORRY.
NO, NO. MY TV ALSO DEAD.
107
00:05:20,861 --> 00:05:23,201
YES. DEAD LIKE RUSSIAN ECONOMY.
(laughs)
108
00:05:23,203 --> 00:05:25,213
VERY FUNNY
LIKE YAKOV SMIRNOFF, NO?
109
00:05:25,205 --> 00:05:27,865
GO AHEAD. USE FOR FREE
ON YOUR TV SHOW. NO CHARGE.
110
00:05:27,868 --> 00:05:29,658
ALL RIGHT.
I'M GOING HOME.
111
00:05:29,660 --> 00:05:32,370
NO, NO, NO, NO.
PLEASE, DO NOT GO. NO.
112
00:05:32,373 --> 00:05:35,383
I KNOW OF GREAT SPORTS BAR
ON 23rd STREET. HUH?
113
00:05:35,376 --> 00:05:38,216
WE WATCH GAME THERE.
FLATSCREEN, CHICKEN WINGS,
114
00:05:38,218 --> 00:05:40,458
THE BLONDE WAITRESSES
WITH THE BIG BOOBS,
115
00:05:40,461 --> 00:05:42,921
DRESSED LIKE THE REFEREES.
WE GO AS NEIGHBORS.
116
00:05:42,923 --> 00:05:45,933
OH, I WANNA WATCH THE GAME.
ALL RIGHT. WHAT THE HELL.
117
00:05:45,926 --> 00:05:48,726
ALL RIGHT. WHY NOT?
"WHY NOT" IS BEAUTIFUL!
(laughs)
118
00:05:48,729 --> 00:05:50,729
OKAY, JUST SO YOU KNOW,
WE'RE NEIGHBORS...
119
00:05:50,731 --> 00:05:53,231
WE'RE NOT GONNA SHAKE HANDS
ANYMORE, OKAY?
120
00:05:53,233 --> 00:05:55,243
EVEN ON HOLIDAYS,
WE'RE GOOD.
121
00:05:55,235 --> 00:05:59,065
I GO PUT FERRET IN CAGE.
BE BACK IN ONE MINUTE.
OH, BOY.
122
00:05:59,069 --> 00:06:01,609
DID YOU GET RID OF HIM?
123
00:06:01,612 --> 00:06:04,952
EVEN BETTER. I TALKED HIM INTO
GOING TO A SPORTS BAR WITH ME.
124
00:06:04,945 --> 00:06:07,745
I'LL KEEP HIM THERE WHILE
YOU GUYS WORK ON THE SAFE.
125
00:06:07,748 --> 00:06:10,698
I'LL HANG ON TO HIM
AS LONG AS I CAN, OKAY?
(Esperanza) GOOD JOB.
126
00:06:10,701 --> 00:06:12,911
ANYBODY WANT TO PLAY
SOME DENTAL FLOSS CAT'S CRADLE?
127
00:06:12,913 --> 00:06:15,053
MNH-MNH.
128
00:06:17,047 --> 00:06:18,417
(man calling play-by-play
on TV)
129
00:06:18,419 --> 00:06:20,759
HEADS-UP. PENALTY.
130
00:06:20,761 --> 00:06:22,381
AH, YOU SEE, BOB SAGETS.
IS BEAUTIFUL!
131
00:06:22,382 --> 00:06:24,132
YES? WE ENJOY
OUR NIGHT HERE.
132
00:06:24,134 --> 00:06:25,894
YEAH, LISTEN.
I'M NOT BOB SAGET, OKAY?
133
00:06:25,886 --> 00:06:27,506
I'M RAY ROMANO.
134
00:06:27,508 --> 00:06:30,678
OH, YES! FROM THE "EVERYBODY
LOVE RAYMOND" SHOW!
135
00:06:30,681 --> 00:06:32,101
(laughs) YES.
136
00:06:32,102 --> 00:06:35,232
EVERY EPISODE, LADY SAY,
"DEBRA, YOU NO CAN COOK!"
137
00:06:35,225 --> 00:06:36,855
(laughs) VERY FUNNY.
138
00:06:36,857 --> 00:06:38,857
YEAH, THAT'S IT.
THAT'S OUR SHOW.
139
00:06:38,859 --> 00:06:40,779
EXCUSE ME. ANOTHER ONE?
140
00:06:40,781 --> 00:06:42,731
ME, MYSELF--I AM NOT
IN THE SHOW BUSINESS.
141
00:06:42,733 --> 00:06:45,953
YOU KNOW WHAT? YOU DON'T EVEN
HAVE TO TELL ME WHAT YOU DO.
142
00:06:45,946 --> 00:06:48,236
I RESPECT YOUR PRIVACY.
I AM IMPORTER AND EXPORTER.
143
00:06:48,238 --> 00:06:50,328
SOME DAYS I IMPORT.
SOME DAYS I EXPORT.
144
00:06:50,330 --> 00:06:53,330
AND EVERY SO OFTEN, I IMPORT
AND EXPORT ON THE SAME DAY,
145
00:06:53,333 --> 00:06:55,803
WHEN MY TESTOSTERONE LEVELS
ARE VERY HIGH. YES.
146
00:06:55,796 --> 00:06:57,796
YOU UNDERSTAND ME,
MY FRIEND?
147
00:06:57,798 --> 00:07:00,208
YOU SHOULD EXPORT
SOME OF THAT MUSTACHE.
148
00:07:00,210 --> 00:07:02,340
(laughs)
THANK YOU. THANK YOU.
149
00:07:02,342 --> 00:07:04,512
KEEP THEM COMING, OKAY?
150
00:07:04,505 --> 00:07:05,925
(Louis)
CHECK OUT THIS DISGUISE.
151
00:07:05,926 --> 00:07:07,716
(Southern accent)
HEY THERE, LITTLE LADY.
152
00:07:07,718 --> 00:07:10,048
WHAT DO YOU SAY YOU AND I GO
IN THE OTHER ROOM,
153
00:07:10,050 --> 00:07:11,930
AND I TEACH YOU
154
00:07:11,932 --> 00:07:14,562
EVERYTHING I KNOW
ABOUT ROPIN' A LONGHORN STEER?
155
00:07:14,555 --> 00:07:16,555
LOUIS,
IF WE EVER HAVE SEX,
156
00:07:16,557 --> 00:07:20,937
YOU WOULD BE UNABLE TO WALK
OR TALK FOR SEVERAL MONTHS.
157
00:07:20,941 --> 00:07:23,191
(normal voice)
JUST PRETENDING.
158
00:07:25,065 --> 00:07:28,025
SWEET GEORGIA BROWN!
WE'RE GONNA BE RICH!
159
00:07:31,031 --> 00:07:33,991
(man) HE SHOOTS. HE SCORES!
AAH!
160
00:07:33,994 --> 00:07:35,924
THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT.
NICE JOB.
161
00:07:35,916 --> 00:07:39,166
IT'S GONNA
COST ME 100 GRAND.
(normal voice) 100 GRAND?
162
00:07:39,169 --> 00:07:41,129
I DON'T CARE.
I DON'T EVEN CARE.
163
00:07:41,131 --> 00:07:43,251
I LIKE LOSING
BETTER THAN WINNING.
164
00:07:43,253 --> 00:07:45,263
(Russian accent) WELL,
MAYBE YOU BET ON ANOTHER GAME,
165
00:07:45,255 --> 00:07:48,295
AND WE STAY
AND WATCH THIS, TOO!
HELLO, MR. ROMANO.
NED LUTZ--I'M THE MANAGER,
166
00:07:48,298 --> 00:07:51,548
AND I WANTED TO GIVE YOU A FREE
SAMPLING OF OUR APPETEASERS.
167
00:07:51,552 --> 00:07:55,102
HERE WE GO.
WE HAVE FRIED CALAMARI...
168
00:07:55,095 --> 00:07:57,515
I DON'T... REALLY--
LOOK AT THIS CALAMARI--
169
00:07:57,518 --> 00:07:59,438
THIS PERFECT BLEND
OF RINGS AND TENTACLES.
170
00:07:59,439 --> 00:08:02,559
WE ENJOY THIS ALL NIGHT!
3-ALARM CHILI...
171
00:08:02,563 --> 00:08:05,663
LOOK, I DON'T WANT...
(stammering)
172
00:08:05,656 --> 00:08:07,866
4-ALARM CHILI...
WHY? WHY? WHY?
173
00:08:07,868 --> 00:08:10,448
WHY DO YOU WANT
TO GIVE ME APPETIZERS?
I'M SORRY?
174
00:08:10,450 --> 00:08:13,240
I MEAN, WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN
EXACTLY? ARE PEOPLE GONNA LOOK?
175
00:08:13,243 --> 00:08:15,883
"HEY, THAT'S THE GUY FROM TV.
HE'S GETTING APPETIZERS.
176
00:08:15,876 --> 00:08:18,616
YOU KNOW WHAT?
NOW I WANT TO GET APPETIZERS."
177
00:08:18,619 --> 00:08:20,999
HUH? SERIOUSLY,
PUT YOURSELF IN THEIR SHOES,
178
00:08:21,001 --> 00:08:24,001
LIKE, LET'S SAY YOU SAW THE POPE
EATING MOZZARELLA STICKS.
179
00:08:24,004 --> 00:08:27,014
WOULD THAT REALLY MAKE YOU WANT
TO EAT MORE MOZZARELLA STICKS?
180
00:08:27,007 --> 00:08:28,047
NO.
181
00:08:28,048 --> 00:08:29,428
(Squatch) Hey, Chief.
182
00:08:29,429 --> 00:08:31,429
THIS GUY'S A MENTAL CASE.
183
00:08:31,431 --> 00:08:33,431
THEY OFFERED HIM
FREE APPETIZERS.
184
00:08:33,433 --> 00:08:36,103
HE'S HAVING A MELTDOWN.
HOW ARE THINGS OVER THERE?
185
00:08:36,096 --> 00:08:38,096
(all speaking at once)
YOU KNOW,
IT'S PRETTY GOOD.
186
00:08:38,098 --> 00:08:40,098
OH, MY GOD! I'M ON FIRE!
187
00:08:40,100 --> 00:08:42,100
I'M ON FIRE!
I'M ON FIRE! I'M ON FIRE!
188
00:08:42,102 --> 00:08:44,102
STOP, DROP AND ROLL.
189
00:08:44,104 --> 00:08:46,244
HOW MUCH TIME YOU NEED?
190
00:08:46,236 --> 00:08:50,606
I WOULD SAY ANYWHERE BETWEEN
AN HOUR AND THREE MONTHS.
What?!
191
00:08:50,611 --> 00:08:53,451
WELL, YEAH, WE STILL HAVE
SOME KINKS TO WORK OUT.
HELP ME! HELP ME!
192
00:08:53,453 --> 00:08:55,423
AAH!
193
00:08:55,415 --> 00:08:57,415
OKAY, NEW PLAN, ALL RIGHT?
194
00:08:57,417 --> 00:09:00,577
I NEED YOU GUYS DOWN HERE PRONTO
TO HELP DELAY HIM. ALL RIGHT?
195
00:09:00,581 --> 00:09:03,661
UH, IT'S--IT'S THE GRAND SALOON.
IT'S RIGHT AROUND THE CORNER.
196
00:09:03,664 --> 00:09:05,594
I'LL GO BACK UP THERE
AND DEAL WITH THE SAFE.
197
00:09:05,586 --> 00:09:08,716
(Esperanza) HEY!
WE'RE OUT THE DOOR, CHIEF.
198
00:09:08,719 --> 00:09:10,129
(Eugene) 'SCUSE.
199
00:09:10,130 --> 00:09:12,170
UH, I'M HAPPY
TO TAKE THEM AWAY.
200
00:09:12,172 --> 00:09:14,172
(imitating Ned)
I'M HAPPY TO TAKE IT AWAY.
201
00:09:14,174 --> 00:09:16,314
WE'RE JUST THRILLED TO HAVE YOU,
MR. ROMANO.
202
00:09:16,306 --> 00:09:18,726
(speaks gibberish)
203
00:09:18,729 --> 00:09:21,059
I DON'T REALLY
SOUND LIKE THAT.
204
00:09:21,061 --> 00:09:23,641
(gravelly voice)
I DON'T SOUND LIKE THAT.
205
00:09:23,644 --> 00:09:26,194
ARE YOU... OKAY, MR. ROMANO?
206
00:09:26,186 --> 00:09:31,276
(growls)
207
00:09:31,281 --> 00:09:33,281
(laughs)
208
00:09:33,283 --> 00:09:35,253
(normal voice)
WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH YOU?
209
00:09:35,245 --> 00:09:37,615
YOU'RE EVEN FUNNIER IN PERSON,
YOU KNOW THAT?
210
00:09:37,618 --> 00:09:41,158
OKAY, I'M OUT OF HERE.
NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, WAIT.
COME BACK. PLEASE!
211
00:09:41,161 --> 00:09:43,161
ENJOY THE APPETEASERS!
212
00:09:43,163 --> 00:09:46,673
SQUATCH, PLEASE TELL ME
YOU'RE CLOSE.
213
00:09:56,346 --> 00:09:58,516
(Squatch) 'SCUSE ME.
'SCUSE ME. 'SCUSE ME.
214
00:09:58,518 --> 00:10:02,388
YOU, YOU, I KNOW YOU.
(laughs)
YEAH. OKAY. I'M IN A LITTLE BIT
OF A RUSH HERE, OKAY?
215
00:10:02,392 --> 00:10:05,822
OH, YEAH, YEAH. JUST GET
A QUICK AUTOGRAPH THEN. PLEASE?
216
00:10:05,816 --> 00:10:08,436
PLEASE? OH, YEAH. THAT'S GOOD.
OKAY, MY NAME IS STEVE.
STEVE.
217
00:10:08,438 --> 00:10:10,818
ALL RIGHT?
ALL RIGHT. THANK YOU.
218
00:10:10,821 --> 00:10:13,821
NO, WAIT, WAIT.
MY LAST NAME IS--
NO, WE'RE FRIENDS. WE DON'T
NEED LAST NAMES, RIGHT?
219
00:10:13,824 --> 00:10:16,834
RIGHT. HERE YOU GO.
(laughs) THIS IS THE COMIC MIND
THAT BROUGHT US THE SOUP NAZI.
220
00:10:16,827 --> 00:10:19,367
STILL GOT THE TOUCH.
YOU ARE GOOD.
YEAH, THAT'S SEINFELD.
THAT'S SEINFELD.
221
00:10:19,369 --> 00:10:21,239
(man) RAY! RAY! RAY! RAY!
222
00:10:21,241 --> 00:10:23,621
SAY HI TO BRAD GARRETT
FOR ME, WILL YA?
223
00:10:23,623 --> 00:10:26,213
I WILL. I'LL TELL HIM THAT
SOME RANDOM GUY SAYS "HELLO,"
224
00:10:26,206 --> 00:10:29,166
AND THEN IF HE WANTS TO CALL YOU
TO SAY, "OKAY, GOOD,"
225
00:10:29,169 --> 00:10:32,049
HOW SHOULD HE DO THAT?
OH, WELL, I WORK
FOR J.D. POWER AND ASSOCIATES.
226
00:10:32,052 --> 00:10:34,422
OKAY, GOOD.
HEY, EVERYBODY!
I GOT RAY ROMANO OVER HERE!
227
00:10:34,424 --> 00:10:37,434
HEY, COME ON.
COME STEP RIGHT UP AND GET
YOUR PICTURE TAKEN WITH HIM.
228
00:10:37,427 --> 00:10:41,137
THE KING OF QUEENS HIMSELF,
RAYMOND P. ROMANO!
UH, THANK YOU. THANK YOU.
I GOTTA GO, GUYS. TAXI!
229
00:10:41,141 --> 00:10:43,141
(Squatch) RAY! RAY! RAY!
COME ON, RAY! PLEASE.
230
00:10:43,143 --> 00:10:45,273
YOU GOTTA MEET MY SISTER,
RAY.
231
00:10:45,265 --> 00:10:47,265
(closes door)
48th AND 5th, PLEASE.
232
00:10:47,267 --> 00:10:49,357
STRAIGHTAWAY, MY FRIEND.
STRAIGHTAWAY.
233
00:10:51,822 --> 00:10:54,112
WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
WHY DIDN'T YOU TURN HERE?
234
00:10:54,114 --> 00:10:57,664
I'M JUST FIVE BLOCKS AWAY HERE.
THE STREET IS CLOSED,
UH, FOR THE PARADE.
235
00:10:57,657 --> 00:10:59,827
WHAT PARADE?
THE MEXICANS'.
236
00:10:59,830 --> 00:11:03,330
MEXICANS? HAVING A PARADE
ON FIFTH AVENUE ON FRIDAY NIGHT?
237
00:11:03,333 --> 00:11:06,173
AND WHY NOT?
THEY'RE A FUN-LOVING PEOPLE.
238
00:11:06,166 --> 00:11:08,626
SOMBREROS, CHIMICHANGAS,
COCKFIGHTS.
239
00:11:08,628 --> 00:11:11,288
HAVE YOU EVER BEEN
TO A COCKFIGHT?
240
00:11:11,291 --> 00:11:13,291
NOTHING MAKES
YOU FEEL MORE ALIVE
241
00:11:13,293 --> 00:11:16,763
THAN WATCHING TWO ROOSTERS
KICK ONE ANOTHER.
242
00:11:19,059 --> 00:11:21,429
(door closes)
(Louis)
OVER HERE, MR. GURKIN.
243
00:11:21,431 --> 00:11:23,301
LOUIS, ARE YOU OKAY?
244
00:11:23,303 --> 00:11:25,733
I'M A LITTLE THIRSTY.
245
00:11:25,726 --> 00:11:27,146
WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU?
246
00:11:27,147 --> 00:11:29,147
WELL, A PIPE SPRUNG A LEAK
IN THE WALL,
247
00:11:29,149 --> 00:11:32,979
SO I CRAWLED IN THAT HOLE
OVER THERE TO TRY AND FIX IT.
248
00:11:32,983 --> 00:11:35,743
WE GOTTA GET YOU OUT OF THERE.
UH... AHA!
249
00:11:35,736 --> 00:11:38,076
UH, MR. GURKIN?
250
00:11:38,078 --> 00:11:40,658
I DON'T MEAN TO BE
A BACKSEAT RESCUER OVER HERE,
251
00:11:40,660 --> 00:11:42,530
BUT IF YOU USE
THAT CHAIN SAW,
252
00:11:42,532 --> 00:11:44,532
YOU'RE VERY LIKELY
TO DISMEMBER ME.
253
00:11:44,534 --> 00:11:47,884
UH, RIGHT. AH!
ROOT BEER. HUH?
254
00:11:47,878 --> 00:11:50,088
YEAH, YOU, UH,
YOU GOT ANYTHING DIET?
255
00:11:50,090 --> 00:11:51,420
UH...
256
00:11:51,421 --> 00:11:54,381
YOU KNOW, WILFORD BRIMLEY WAS
ONCE ARRESTED AT A COCKFIGHT.
257
00:11:54,384 --> 00:11:58,224
TRUE STORY.
I READ IT ON WIKIPEDIA.
ALL RIGHT, LISTEN.
PULL OVER. I'M SERIOUS.
258
00:11:58,218 --> 00:12:00,218
I JUST--I WANNA GET OUT.
259
00:12:00,220 --> 00:12:02,930
I... NO, WE'RE ALMOST THERE.
HERE. HOW ABOUT SOME MUSIC?
260
00:12:02,933 --> 00:12:05,523
I DON'T WANT ANY MUSIC.
(L.F.O.'s "Summer Girls"
playing)
261
00:12:05,515 --> 00:12:07,805
♪ NEW KIDS ON THE BLOCK
HAD A BUNCH OF HITS ♪
262
00:12:07,808 --> 00:12:09,978
♪ CHINESE FOOD
MAKES ME SICK ♪
I WANT TO GET OUT.
263
00:12:09,980 --> 00:12:11,900
WE'RE ALMOST THERE.
264
00:12:11,902 --> 00:12:13,312
♪ I THINK IT'S FLY ♪
265
00:12:13,313 --> 00:12:15,203
♪ WHEN GIRLS STOP BY FOR
THE SUMMER, FOR THE SUMMER ♪
266
00:12:15,195 --> 00:12:16,615
YOU KNOW WHAT I LIKE?
I DON'T KNOW WHERE I AM.
267
00:12:16,616 --> 00:12:18,196
♪ I LIKE GIRLS THAT WEAR
THAT ABERCROMBIE & FITCH ♪
268
00:12:18,198 --> 00:12:20,948
STOP THE CAR. I'M GETTING OUT.
HERE, TAKE THAT.
269
00:12:20,951 --> 00:12:24,701
FOR GOD SAKE. I DON'T CARE.
PULL OVER. PULL OVER.
HERE. I'M GETTING OUT.
270
00:12:24,704 --> 00:12:26,794
YOU MIGHT WANNA LOOSEN
THAT TURBAN A LITTLE.
271
00:12:26,787 --> 00:12:29,997
OKAY, MY FRIEND, AND WELCOME
TO HARLEM, U.S.A. (laughs)
272
00:12:30,000 --> 00:12:33,630
(tires screech)
273
00:12:33,633 --> 00:12:35,933
OKAY. RAYMOND JUST GOT
OF GARY'S CAB.
274
00:12:35,926 --> 00:12:38,046
WE'RE RUNNING OUT OF TIME.
275
00:12:38,048 --> 00:12:40,798
YEAH, LISTEN, CAN YOU SEND A CAB
TO COME GET ME IN HARLEM?
276
00:12:40,801 --> 00:12:42,511
I DON'T KNOW WHERE IN HARLEM.
277
00:12:42,512 --> 00:12:44,142
I DON'T--YEAH.
278
00:12:44,144 --> 00:12:46,234
HEY. HEY.
279
00:12:46,226 --> 00:12:48,976
LISTEN, LISTEN,
I'LL PAY FOR IT.
280
00:12:48,979 --> 00:12:51,979
JUST SEND A WHOLE BUNCH OF CABS
AND HAVE THEM DRIVE AROUND
281
00:12:51,982 --> 00:12:53,732
AND LOOK FOR ME.
ALL RIGHT? YEAH.
282
00:12:53,733 --> 00:12:55,243
GOOD EVENING,
WHITE BOY.
283
00:12:55,235 --> 00:12:57,155
HEY. HOW ARE YA?
284
00:12:57,157 --> 00:12:59,157
TELL ME, WHAT BRINGS YOU
285
00:12:59,159 --> 00:13:01,319
ALL THE WAY
UP TO 311th STREET TONIGHT?
286
00:13:01,321 --> 00:13:03,321
PERHAPS YOU LOOKING
TO SCORE SOME SMACK.
287
00:13:03,323 --> 00:13:05,413
NO, NO, I GOT, YOU KNOW,
I GOT A LOT OF SMACK AT HOME.
288
00:13:05,405 --> 00:13:07,955
I'M, UH, I'M GOOD ON SMACK.
THANK YOU, THOUGH.
289
00:13:07,958 --> 00:13:11,288
I'M GONNA GO HOME AND--AND ENJOY
SOME SMACK RIGHT NOW. THANKS.
THEN I SUPPOSE YOU'RE HERE
290
00:13:11,291 --> 00:13:14,291
TO GET YOUR FREAK ON
WITH A FINE MAHOGANY SISTER?
291
00:13:14,294 --> 00:13:16,264
I APPLAUD YOUR TASTE IN ASS.
292
00:13:16,256 --> 00:13:19,336
I'M JUST GONNA GET A CAB
AND GO HOME. THANK YOU.
BUT IT AIN'T SAFE
TO WAIT HERE.
293
00:13:19,339 --> 00:13:21,879
HEY, SAY, MAN, YOU LIKE
SEMILEGAL STRIP CLUBS?
294
00:13:21,882 --> 00:13:24,222
'COURSE YOU DO. LET'S GO.
OH, NO, NO, NO. LOOK. LOOK,
THERE'S A CAB RIGHT HERE. TAXI!
295
00:13:24,224 --> 00:13:26,274
TAXI! TAXI! TAXI!
WHOA, WHOA, WHOA.
296
00:13:26,266 --> 00:13:28,266
WHOA, WHOA, WHOA.
FALSE ALARM, MAN. KEEP MOVIN'.
297
00:13:28,268 --> 00:13:30,268
WHOA, WHOA, WHOA.
NO, NO, NO!
TAXI! TAXI! TAXI!
298
00:13:30,270 --> 00:13:32,770
COME ON, MAN.
LET'S GO TO THE STRIP CLUB.
(door closes)
299
00:13:32,772 --> 00:13:34,772
THEY GOT
FREE EGG SALAD SANDWICHES!
300
00:13:36,776 --> 00:13:39,696
HEY! WE'RE SCREWED!
RAY ROMANO'S COMING!
NOW?!
301
00:13:39,699 --> 00:13:42,489
ROCKEFELLER WAS SUPPOSED
TO TAKE HIM TO A STRIP CLUB,
302
00:13:42,492 --> 00:13:45,292
BUT HE GOT AWAY.
LOOK, UH, THERE'S A HACKSAW
RIGHT THERE ON THE TABLE.
303
00:13:45,285 --> 00:13:48,285
GRAB IT AND GET TO WORK.
NO, HE'S COMING RIGHT NOW!
304
00:13:48,288 --> 00:13:51,328
I JUST SAW HIM
GETTING OUT OF A CAB!
OH, GOD.
WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO?
305
00:13:51,331 --> 00:13:53,331
JUST GO.
WHAT?!
306
00:13:53,333 --> 00:13:55,383
JUST GO, MR. GURKIN.
THE SAFE'S RIGHT OVER THERE.
307
00:13:55,375 --> 00:13:57,375
JUST TAKE IT AND GO.
LOOK, ARE YOU CRAZY?
308
00:13:57,377 --> 00:13:59,377
WE HAVEN'T EVEN PUT
THE REPLACEMENT SAFE IN YET.
309
00:13:59,379 --> 00:14:02,259
IF RAY GETS BACK AND HE SEES
THE BIG HOLE IN HIS APARTMENT,
310
00:14:02,262 --> 00:14:05,392
HE'LL KNOW HE WAS ROBBED.
THAT'S OKAY. YOU GUYS JUST TAKE
THE SAFE AND RUN FOR THE HILLS.
311
00:14:05,385 --> 00:14:08,225
YOU'LL BE FINE.
BUT WHAT ABOUT YOU?
312
00:14:08,228 --> 00:14:10,848
DON'T YOU WORRY ABOUT ME,
SEÑORITA VILLALOBOS.
313
00:14:10,850 --> 00:14:12,930
I'VE HAD
A PRETTY GOOD LIFE.
314
00:14:12,933 --> 00:14:15,903
I-I'VE SEEN TWO OF
THE SEVEN WONDERS OF THE WORLD--
315
00:14:15,896 --> 00:14:17,396
THE LIBERTY BELL
AND THE CHUNNEL.
316
00:14:17,397 --> 00:14:19,567
JUST--I DON'T WANT
TO HOLD YOU BACK.
317
00:14:19,569 --> 00:14:22,069
JUST GO, NOW.
318
00:14:22,072 --> 00:14:23,482
NO.
319
00:14:25,195 --> 00:14:28,865
I WILL NOT ALLOW THIS,
LOUIS PLUNK.
320
00:14:28,868 --> 00:14:31,868
YOU AND THE REST OF THE KNIGHTS
HAVE SACRIFICED ENOUGH.
321
00:14:31,871 --> 00:14:33,871
WHEN ENRICO CAME TO GET ME,
322
00:14:33,873 --> 00:14:36,003
YOU GAVE UP EVERYTHING
FOR MY FREEDOM.
323
00:14:35,996 --> 00:14:37,996
IT IS MY TURN NOW.
324
00:14:37,998 --> 00:14:42,048
THERE'S ONLY ONE WAY LEFT TO
KEEP HIM OUT OF HIS APARTMENT.
325
00:14:42,052 --> 00:14:45,602
I WILL HAVE THE SEX
WITH "EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMOND."
326
00:14:57,147 --> 00:14:58,317
RAY ROMANO.
327
00:15:00,280 --> 00:15:03,190
I'VE ALWAYS DREAMED
OF SLEEPING WITH YOU.
328
00:15:03,193 --> 00:15:05,493
WHAT?
BUT NOT HERE.
329
00:15:05,485 --> 00:15:08,575
IT MUST BE IN A FANCY HOTEL
IN MIDTOWN.
330
00:15:08,578 --> 00:15:10,908
WHAT ARE YOU,
ONE OF THOSE PROFESSIONAL...
331
00:15:10,910 --> 00:15:12,580
SEX LADIES?
332
00:15:12,582 --> 00:15:14,872
I'M A DANCER BY NIGHT,
A WELDER BY DAY.
333
00:15:14,874 --> 00:15:18,134
HOORAY! I SEE YOU HAVE MET
MY SISTER, NATASHA.
334
00:15:18,128 --> 00:15:20,338
ALL RIGHT.
NOW I'M IN CRAZY TOWN.
335
00:15:20,340 --> 00:15:22,670
I MUST HAVE YOU.
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
336
00:15:22,672 --> 00:15:26,222
YOU DON'T WANT
TO SLEEP WITH ME.
MORE THAN ANYTHING
IN THIS WORLD.
337
00:15:26,216 --> 00:15:27,806
NATASHA, WE MUST TALK.
338
00:15:27,807 --> 00:15:29,597
YOU'RE A BEAUTIFUL MAN.
339
00:15:29,599 --> 00:15:31,599
I AM NOT A BEAUTIFUL MAN.
340
00:15:31,601 --> 00:15:34,141
I'M A... AN OLD ZACH BRAFF.
341
00:15:34,144 --> 00:15:35,274
NATASHA, COME!
342
00:15:35,265 --> 00:15:38,315
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!
(whispers) THIS IS CRAZY.
343
00:15:38,318 --> 00:15:40,438
(whispering) FOR THE GOODS
OF THE KNIGHTS OF PROSPERITY,
344
00:15:40,440 --> 00:15:42,440
I WILL GIVE MY BODY
TO "EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMOND."
345
00:15:42,442 --> 00:15:44,232
GOOD NIGHT, CRAZY PEOPLE.
346
00:15:44,234 --> 00:15:45,914
THERE'S NO OTHER WAY.
347
00:15:45,905 --> 00:15:48,325
(normal voice)
PLEASE, TAKE ME NOW...
348
00:15:48,328 --> 00:15:50,908
IN A FANCY HOTEL
IN MIDTOWN.
349
00:15:50,910 --> 00:15:54,280
DON'T YOU SEE HOW WRONG
THIS IS? DON'T YOU REALIZE THAT?
350
00:15:54,284 --> 00:15:57,214
I WILL DO SPECIAL THINGS.
351
00:16:02,382 --> 00:16:04,382
(horn honks)
352
00:16:04,384 --> 00:16:07,014
THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT'S WRONG
WITH SHOW BUSINESS.
(door closes)
353
00:16:07,007 --> 00:16:10,007
THIS IS JUST PLAIN WRONG.
YOU WANT ME TO SIT IN THE CHAIR,
354
00:16:10,010 --> 00:16:14,090
OR SHOULD I GET
RIGHT IN THE BED?
I WOULD LIKE TO FRESHEN UP
MY PRIVATE AREAS FIRST.
355
00:16:14,094 --> 00:16:16,314
OKAY. ALL RIGHT.
356
00:16:16,306 --> 00:16:18,356
MINE ARE PRETTY MUCH
READY TO GO.
357
00:16:18,358 --> 00:16:20,358
WE GOTTA GET YOU
OUT OF HERE
358
00:16:20,360 --> 00:16:22,020
BEFORE ESPERANZA SLEEPS
WITH RAY ROMANO!
359
00:16:22,022 --> 00:16:24,192
HE'S PROBABLY DOING THINGS
TO HER RIGHT NOW.
360
00:16:24,194 --> 00:16:26,704
I BET HE'S USING SPECIAL
CELEBRITY SEXUAL TECHNIQUES.
361
00:16:28,528 --> 00:16:32,488
(chain saw roaring)
362
00:16:32,492 --> 00:16:35,502
(Esperanza) OKAY,
I'M COMING FOR YOU NOW.
363
00:16:35,495 --> 00:16:36,915
I WILL--
364
00:16:36,916 --> 00:16:38,496
YEAH, NO, THE PLAY CLOSED.
365
00:16:38,498 --> 00:16:42,378
YEAH, WELL, NOBODY WANTS
TO SEE ME DO SERIOUS STUFF.
366
00:16:42,382 --> 00:16:45,842
OH, ALL RIGHT. OKAY.
SAY HI TO THE KIDS.
367
00:16:45,835 --> 00:16:48,045
(hangs up telephone)
368
00:16:48,048 --> 00:16:50,588
YEAH, UH,
I CAN'T DO THIS.
369
00:16:50,590 --> 00:16:52,300
WHAT?
NO, NO, I'M SORRY.
370
00:16:52,302 --> 00:16:56,022
NO, NO, YOU CAN'T LEAVE.
LOOK AT THESE BOSOMS.
371
00:16:56,015 --> 00:16:58,225
I'M GONNA
LET YOU TOUCH THEM.
372
00:16:58,228 --> 00:17:01,688
THIS IS GONNA BE GREAT FUN
FOR YOU. HMM?
373
00:17:01,691 --> 00:17:03,901
AAH! SWEET MOTHER TERESA!
374
00:17:03,903 --> 00:17:07,453
STAY CALM!
YOU'RE GONNA BE FINE!
375
00:17:07,447 --> 00:17:10,147
I DON'T WANT TO DIE
IN RAY ROMANO'S WALL!
376
00:17:10,150 --> 00:17:11,320
(chain saw continues roaring)
377
00:17:11,321 --> 00:17:14,321
HERE. SOME CAB MONEY,
AND, UH, I HAVE TO GO.
378
00:17:14,324 --> 00:17:16,334
WHO WAS THAT ON THE PHONE?
379
00:17:16,326 --> 00:17:17,956
THAT WAS MY WIFE.
380
00:17:17,957 --> 00:17:19,957
WE'VE BEEN MARRIED
FOR 19 YEARS,
381
00:17:19,959 --> 00:17:22,789
AND LAST WEEK,
SHE SEPARATED FROM ME.
382
00:17:26,086 --> 00:17:29,296
DON'T GO.
383
00:17:29,299 --> 00:17:32,169
TELL ME ALL ABOUT IT.
384
00:17:32,172 --> 00:17:33,382
WHEN THE SHOW ENDED,
385
00:17:33,383 --> 00:17:36,273
SHE SAID I STARTED THINKING
TOO MUCH ABOUT EVERYTHING.
386
00:17:36,266 --> 00:17:39,266
AND BEFORE YOU KNOW IT, YOU
START THINKING ABOUT THINKING,
387
00:17:39,269 --> 00:17:41,939
AND THEN YOU TRY THINKING
ABOUT THINKING ABOUT THINKING,
388
00:17:41,941 --> 00:17:43,811
BUT YOU CAN'T! YOU CAN'T.
389
00:17:43,813 --> 00:17:45,823
YOU KNOW WHEN
YOU'RE WALKING ALONG?
390
00:17:45,815 --> 00:17:47,815
YOU EVER LOOK DOWN
AT YOUR LEGS
391
00:17:47,817 --> 00:17:49,817
AND THINK,
"AM I REALLY DOING THAT?"
392
00:17:49,819 --> 00:17:52,189
WAS IT ONE GUY
WHO INVENTED THE SANDWICH,
393
00:17:52,192 --> 00:17:55,252
OR DID HE JUST GET CREDIT
FOR IT? SON OF A--
394
00:17:55,245 --> 00:17:57,285
SAY YOU'RE BUILDING
A TIME MACHINE.
395
00:17:57,287 --> 00:17:59,907
THERE'D REALLY BE NO REASON
TO RUSH, RIGHT?
396
00:17:59,909 --> 00:18:02,289
WHAT IF I COME BACK
IN ANOTHER LIFE,
397
00:18:02,292 --> 00:18:05,672
AND I'M EXACTLY THE SAME
AS I AM NOW...
398
00:18:05,665 --> 00:18:08,585
EXCEPT I HAVE A LISP?
399
00:18:08,588 --> 00:18:10,918
AAH! OOH! AH!
AH.
400
00:18:10,920 --> 00:18:13,590
I'M OUT! I'M OUT!
(Rockefeller laughs)
401
00:18:13,593 --> 00:18:15,683
CONGRATULATIONS,
BABY JESSICA.
402
00:18:15,675 --> 00:18:18,805
NOW LET'S GRAB THE SAFE
AND GET OUT OF HERE.
(cell phone ringing)
403
00:18:18,808 --> 00:18:21,478
(vibrating)
EVERYBODY THINKS IT'S SO MUCH
FUN, BUT BEING A CELEBRITY...
404
00:18:21,481 --> 00:18:23,641
I CAN'T--
I CAN'T HAVE PHONE SEX
405
00:18:23,643 --> 00:18:25,653
'CAUSE PEOPLE
RECOGNIZE MY VOICE.
406
00:18:25,645 --> 00:18:28,645
I CAN--IF I DO AN IMPRESSION,
THEN I CAN DO IT,
407
00:18:28,648 --> 00:18:31,228
BUT ALL I KNOW
IS JAY LENO.
408
00:18:31,231 --> 00:18:32,821
THAT'S NOT VERY ROMANTIC.
409
00:18:32,822 --> 00:18:35,412
(as Jay Leno)
HEY, WHAT ARE YOU WEARIN'?
410
00:18:35,405 --> 00:18:37,945
HEY, WHAT ARE YOU WEARIN'?
411
00:18:37,947 --> 00:18:42,197
(normal voice) DOES THAT
SOUND LIKE JAY LENO?
412
00:18:42,202 --> 00:18:45,122
(as Jay Leno) HEY, WHAT--
TAKE YOUR CLOTHES OFF.
413
00:18:45,124 --> 00:18:47,304
(all laughing)
414
00:18:47,297 --> 00:18:49,297
HEY. WHAT. LOOK AT THIS.
HEY, WHAT'S THE MATTER,
CHIEF?
415
00:18:49,299 --> 00:18:51,919
WE GOT $1.5 MILLION BUCKS
IN HERE!
YEAH.
416
00:18:51,921 --> 00:18:54,131
(Squatch) COME ON.
IT'S JUST THE THOUGHT
OF, UH,
417
00:18:54,133 --> 00:18:56,143
RAY ROMANO LYING
ON TOP OF ESPERANZA
418
00:18:56,135 --> 00:18:59,305
KINDA PUT A DAMPER
ON MY FESTIVITIES, THAT'S ALL.
419
00:18:59,309 --> 00:19:00,719
OH.
COME ON, MAN.
COME ON.
420
00:19:00,720 --> 00:19:02,350
(all speaking at once)
421
00:19:02,352 --> 00:19:04,932
OH, THERE SHE IS!
422
00:19:04,934 --> 00:19:08,234
MS. ESPERANZA VILLA...
WHAT'S YOUR LAST NAME AGAIN?
423
00:19:08,228 --> 00:19:10,978
VILLALOBOS.
VILLALOBOS--
THE CONQUERING HERO!
424
00:19:10,980 --> 00:19:12,320
(cheering)
425
00:19:12,322 --> 00:19:14,982
I MISSED YOUR CALLS.
MY PHONE WAS ON THE VIBRATE.
426
00:19:14,984 --> 00:19:16,994
OH, SPEAKING OF THE VIBRATE,
I'M CURIOUS.
427
00:19:16,986 --> 00:19:20,036
CAN YOU DESCRIBE
RAY ROMANO'S DANDA?
428
00:19:20,039 --> 00:19:21,829
I WOULDN'T KNOW.
429
00:19:21,831 --> 00:19:24,991
W-WAIT--WAIT A MINUTE. YOU...
YOU DIDN'T SLEEP WITH HIM?
430
00:19:24,994 --> 00:19:27,054
IT WAS WORSE.
HE KEPT DRONING ON AND ON
431
00:19:27,046 --> 00:19:30,046
WITH THIS VOICE THAT SOUNDED
LIKE A CANADIAN GOOSE.
432
00:19:30,049 --> 00:19:34,049
(speaks Spanish)
I HAVE NO IDEA
WHAT YOU JUST SAID,
433
00:19:34,053 --> 00:19:37,143
BUT I HOPE IT SPANISH IT MEANS
WE'RE RICH PEOPLE NOW!
(cheering)
434
00:19:37,136 --> 00:19:39,136
YEAH, THAT'S GOOD.
435
00:19:39,138 --> 00:19:40,928
AH, MILADY, UM,
436
00:19:40,930 --> 00:19:44,260
WE GAVE UP EVERYTHING
TO SAVE YOU FROM ENRICO,
437
00:19:44,264 --> 00:19:46,234
AND, UH, TONIGHT YOU HAVE
438
00:19:46,226 --> 00:19:49,726
REPAID US BACK MANY TIMES OVER
BY OFFERING YOUR OWN INNOCENCE.
439
00:19:49,729 --> 00:19:51,269
(laughs)
440
00:19:51,271 --> 00:19:53,571
AND, UH...
WE'D LIKE TO THANK YOU.
441
00:19:53,573 --> 00:19:56,083
(applause)
(Gary) THAT IS SWEET.
THAT IS VERY SWEET.
442
00:19:56,075 --> 00:19:58,815
THAT IS VERY SWEET. YEAH. YEAH,
COME ON. COME TO PAPI.
443
00:19:58,818 --> 00:20:02,028
AH, OKAY.
ALL RIGHT,
LADY AND GENTLEMEN...
444
00:20:02,031 --> 00:20:04,411
(Squatch) HEY.
THIS IS A MOMENTOUS MOMENT
FOR THE KNIGHTS OF PROSPERITY.
445
00:20:04,414 --> 00:20:06,964
(Rockefeller) YEAH.
WE FINALLY STOLE SOMETHING!
446
00:20:06,956 --> 00:20:08,956
HEY, NOT JUST SOMETHING.
447
00:20:08,958 --> 00:20:11,588
WE GOT A $1.5 MILLION RING
IN THIS BABY.
YES, WE DO. YES, WE DO.
448
00:20:11,591 --> 00:20:13,591
YOU KNOW,
I MET A MAN TONIGHT
449
00:20:13,593 --> 00:20:16,183
WHO HAS EVERYTHING HANDED TO HIM
ON A SILVER PLATTER,
450
00:20:16,175 --> 00:20:19,385
AND YOU KNOW WHAT HE IS?
MISERABLE.
451
00:20:19,389 --> 00:20:23,389
THAT'S RIGHT, BUT NOT US,
BECAUSE WE WORKED FOR THIS.
452
00:20:23,393 --> 00:20:25,103
WE EARNED THIS!
453
00:20:25,104 --> 00:20:27,904
EVERY ONE OF US HAS MADE
GREAT PERSONAL SACRIFICE
454
00:20:27,897 --> 00:20:29,807
TO ACHIEVE
THIS GLORIOUS MOMENT,
455
00:20:29,809 --> 00:20:32,019
AND WE CROSSED
A THRESHOLD TOGETHER,
456
00:20:32,021 --> 00:20:33,901
AS KNIGHTS.
457
00:20:33,903 --> 00:20:35,283
HMM?
458
00:20:35,275 --> 00:20:36,655
FOR, AS PROMISED,
459
00:20:36,656 --> 00:20:39,406
OUR LIVES
ARE ABOUT TO BE CHANGED...
460
00:20:39,409 --> 00:20:40,859
FOREVER!
461
00:20:40,860 --> 00:20:45,200
(all cheering)
462
00:20:45,204 --> 00:20:47,334
YEAH! YEAH!
463
00:20:47,327 --> 00:20:48,537
(Esperanza) SALUD!
464
00:20:48,538 --> 00:20:50,288
HEY, QUICK QUESTION.
465
00:20:50,290 --> 00:20:52,420
HOW WE GONNA OPEN
THIS BITCH?
466
00:20:52,422 --> 00:20:53,632
HUH?
467
00:20:55,425 --> 00:20:57,715
UH...
468
00:20:57,717 --> 00:21:00,297
♪ KNIGHTS OF PROSPERITY ♪
469
00:21:00,300 --> 00:21:02,380
(Rockefeller)
WE THE KNIGHTS, BABY.
37261
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof