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1
00:00:01,784 --> 00:00:03,916
I figured out
Franklin'’s anniversary gift.
2
00:00:03,916 --> 00:00:06,093
Have you guys been together
two years already?
3
00:00:06,093 --> 00:00:08,182
No. It'’s the anniversary
of the first time
4
00:00:08,182 --> 00:00:10,097
we shared
the same piece of gum.
5
00:00:10,097 --> 00:00:11,750
I hope
you got to go first.
6
00:00:11,750 --> 00:00:13,100
-And third.
-Mm.
7
00:00:13,100 --> 00:00:14,449
What are you
getting Franklin?
8
00:00:14,449 --> 00:00:16,146
I'’m gonna make him
a licorice cake.
9
00:00:16,146 --> 00:00:17,582
Nothing excites
the kid more
10
00:00:17,582 --> 00:00:19,845
than a pre-World War II
era dessert.
11
00:00:19,845 --> 00:00:21,804
Oh,
stop wasting your time.
12
00:00:21,804 --> 00:00:24,285
Anniversaries are
just lame creations by Hallmark
13
00:00:24,285 --> 00:00:25,721
to make you think
love is real.
14
00:00:25,721 --> 00:00:27,810
Mom, can boys have
a time of the month?
15
00:00:27,810 --> 00:00:29,159
Absolutely.
16
00:00:29,159 --> 00:00:30,595
The symptom to watch for
in your father
17
00:00:30,595 --> 00:00:32,249
is complaining
about the water bill.
18
00:00:35,905 --> 00:00:37,254
-What'’s up?
-Nothing.
19
00:00:37,254 --> 00:00:39,256
Really? Because you seem
like someone
20
00:00:39,256 --> 00:00:40,997
who just saw the girl
he took to the prom,
21
00:00:40,997 --> 00:00:42,433
who he thought
he was kind of dating,
22
00:00:42,433 --> 00:00:43,869
and found out
that she was back in town
23
00:00:43,869 --> 00:00:45,610
and didn'’t call him.
24
00:00:45,610 --> 00:00:47,090
That'’s just the vibe
I'’m getting.
25
00:00:47,090 --> 00:00:48,570
Oh, Taylor told you.
26
00:00:48,570 --> 00:00:51,138
Yes, I have a Lindsey-shaped
hole in my heart.
27
00:00:51,138 --> 00:00:52,965
But the pain has become
my companion.
28
00:00:52,965 --> 00:00:55,794
Moping around the house is not
going to help you feel better.
29
00:00:55,794 --> 00:00:57,709
Why don'’t you come to
Stewart and Kingston'’s with me
30
00:00:57,709 --> 00:00:59,624
and we can pick up
a few things?
31
00:00:59,624 --> 00:01:01,322
No thanks.
32
00:01:01,322 --> 00:01:03,411
Oh, I see.
33
00:01:03,411 --> 00:01:04,977
There'’s been
a misunderstanding.
34
00:01:04,977 --> 00:01:06,892
I used a friendly tone.
35
00:01:06,892 --> 00:01:08,677
My mistake.
36
00:01:08,677 --> 00:01:11,593
Get your [bleep] ass
in the [bleep] car.
37
00:01:11,593 --> 00:01:13,638
That felt right.
38
00:01:13,638 --> 00:01:16,424
--Captions by VITAC--
39
00:01:18,339 --> 00:01:21,342
♪
40
00:01:21,342 --> 00:01:23,213
According to
the City Council election polls,
41
00:01:23,213 --> 00:01:24,823
-you'’re in fourth place.
-How is that possible
42
00:01:24,823 --> 00:01:26,782
when there are
only three people running?
43
00:01:26,782 --> 00:01:29,219
A lot of people are planning
to write in Kanye.
44
00:01:29,219 --> 00:01:30,655
And the main reason
you'’re in last place
45
00:01:30,655 --> 00:01:33,136
is that slimy frontrunner,
Steve Hobert.
46
00:01:33,136 --> 00:01:34,616
I know.
He'’s dumping tons of money
47
00:01:34,616 --> 00:01:36,096
into negative ads
against me.
48
00:01:36,096 --> 00:01:37,271
Well,
you'’re my campaign manager.
49
00:01:37,271 --> 00:01:39,838
There must be some way
to stop him.
50
00:01:39,838 --> 00:01:41,971
How about we take him
out of the race entirely?
51
00:01:41,971 --> 00:01:43,712
-How?
-I did some recon.
52
00:01:43,712 --> 00:01:45,583
I got something good..
53
00:01:45,583 --> 00:01:47,063
What? Hookers?
Drugs?
54
00:01:47,063 --> 00:01:49,065
Nah, dude, "Grand Theft Auto"
made those cool.
55
00:01:49,065 --> 00:01:50,588
That would
get him elected.
56
00:01:50,588 --> 00:01:52,634
No, I found out that Hobert
gets his feet massaged
57
00:01:52,634 --> 00:01:54,592
at the same place in Norwalk
every Wednesday.
58
00:01:54,592 --> 00:01:55,985
How does that help me?
59
00:01:55,985 --> 00:01:58,118
Because I slipped
a masseuse there $5
60
00:01:58,118 --> 00:02:00,511
and then $25,
and then a Mazda Miata,
61
00:02:00,511 --> 00:02:03,514
and she told me that Hobert
gets super relaxed,
62
00:02:03,514 --> 00:02:06,082
starts talking all this smack
about Westport.
63
00:02:06,082 --> 00:02:09,390
Apparently, he thinks
this is a dinky little town
64
00:02:09,390 --> 00:02:11,522
and just a stepping stone
to him becoming a congressman.
65
00:02:11,522 --> 00:02:13,350
So, all we have to do
is record him
66
00:02:13,350 --> 00:02:15,047
bad-mouthing Westport
and put it on the Internet.
67
00:02:15,047 --> 00:02:17,093
Exactly!
68
00:02:21,619 --> 00:02:23,360
I will throw on
one of these disguises
69
00:02:23,360 --> 00:02:24,753
that I use
for my prank videos.
70
00:02:24,753 --> 00:02:26,581
I will go down
to the massage parlor
71
00:02:26,581 --> 00:02:27,930
and I will record
the Hobert scandal
72
00:02:27,930 --> 00:02:29,845
with a hidden camera.
73
00:02:29,845 --> 00:02:31,890
Then I'’m gonna go
to my buddy'’s house,
74
00:02:31,890 --> 00:02:33,196
trick him into making out
with me.
75
00:02:33,196 --> 00:02:35,067
Boom!
Three million views.
76
00:02:35,067 --> 00:02:38,636
No,
you will not spy on Hobert.
77
00:02:38,636 --> 00:02:40,029
I'’ll do it.
78
00:02:40,029 --> 00:02:41,291
It'’s my political victory
on the line,
79
00:02:41,291 --> 00:02:43,467
and my honor
the man has besmirched.
80
00:02:43,467 --> 00:02:45,774
Look whose plums
just dropped.
81
00:02:45,774 --> 00:02:47,123
I love the new Greg.
82
00:02:47,123 --> 00:02:48,690
Fun fact,
did you know that plums
83
00:02:48,690 --> 00:02:50,344
were a sign of courtship
in feudal Japan?
84
00:02:50,344 --> 00:02:53,303
Old Greg
clawing his ass back.
85
00:02:53,303 --> 00:02:55,479
So, it'’s kind of weird
we haven'’t talked,
86
00:02:55,479 --> 00:02:58,569
you know, about what happened
at Stewart and Kingston'’s.
87
00:02:58,569 --> 00:02:59,962
You mean
when I was with Andre
88
00:02:59,962 --> 00:03:01,093
and you were
with that girl from work?
89
00:03:01,093 --> 00:03:02,312
Stella and I
are just friends.
90
00:03:02,312 --> 00:03:03,531
It'’s fine.
91
00:03:03,531 --> 00:03:05,228
And, uh,
Andre and I aren'’t --
92
00:03:05,228 --> 00:03:07,187
No, I know. I know.
93
00:03:09,493 --> 00:03:11,060
But we need to talk.
94
00:03:11,060 --> 00:03:12,801
Um...
95
00:03:12,801 --> 00:03:14,890
this is really hard.
96
00:03:14,890 --> 00:03:17,762
Uh, I love you so much,
97
00:03:17,762 --> 00:03:21,331
but I feel like...
98
00:03:21,331 --> 00:03:23,464
Like you need
some space?
99
00:03:23,464 --> 00:03:24,987
Or were you gonna say
a snack?
100
00:03:24,987 --> 00:03:26,206
'’Cause I have some gummy worms
in the car.
101
00:03:26,206 --> 00:03:27,946
-Trip.
-You need some space.
102
00:03:30,210 --> 00:03:32,081
-I get it.
-You do?
103
00:03:32,081 --> 00:03:34,344
I was kind of thinking
the same thing.
104
00:03:34,344 --> 00:03:35,954
How can we be sure that
we'’re meant to be together
105
00:03:35,954 --> 00:03:37,652
if we'’ve never been
with anyone else?
106
00:03:37,652 --> 00:03:39,393
You'’re not just saying that
to make me feel better?
107
00:03:39,393 --> 00:03:43,092
No, I even wrote it in Sharpie
on my hand.
108
00:03:43,092 --> 00:03:44,615
I ran out of space
'’cause I always write too big
109
00:03:44,615 --> 00:03:46,226
in the beginning.
You know?
110
00:03:46,226 --> 00:03:48,619
I can'’t believe
we'’re having this conversation.
111
00:03:48,619 --> 00:03:52,014
Babe, it'’s okay.
112
00:03:52,014 --> 00:03:53,363
If we'’re supposed
to be together forever,
113
00:03:53,363 --> 00:03:56,236
then we'’ll find our way back
someday.
114
00:03:58,673 --> 00:04:00,457
So what do we do now?
115
00:04:00,457 --> 00:04:03,634
I guess, uh...
116
00:04:03,634 --> 00:04:05,941
I'’ll see ya.
117
00:04:05,941 --> 00:04:08,465
Yeah, see ya.
118
00:04:08,465 --> 00:04:10,815
Oh, wait,
there'’s something else I have to tell you.
119
00:04:10,815 --> 00:04:13,644
Fuji apples,
only if firm.
120
00:04:13,644 --> 00:04:14,950
Oh, oh.
121
00:04:14,950 --> 00:04:16,168
Forget it.
That was for my mom.
122
00:04:18,780 --> 00:04:21,739
[ Engine starts ]
123
00:04:21,739 --> 00:04:35,231
♪
124
00:04:35,231 --> 00:04:36,885
See?
125
00:04:36,885 --> 00:04:38,539
Isn'’t it good
getting out of the house?
126
00:04:38,539 --> 00:04:41,193
My house is my pain
and I can never truly leave.
127
00:04:41,193 --> 00:04:42,412
I'’m seconds away
from slapping you.
128
00:04:44,588 --> 00:04:46,198
Oliver, right?
129
00:04:46,198 --> 00:04:48,200
You'’re in my econ class.
130
00:04:48,200 --> 00:04:49,854
I should really
deny you service
131
00:04:49,854 --> 00:04:52,292
for always acing those tests
and messing up the curve.
132
00:04:52,292 --> 00:04:53,467
Audra.
133
00:04:53,467 --> 00:04:55,425
Right. Hey.
134
00:04:55,425 --> 00:04:57,471
It'’s nice to see you
outside of school.
135
00:04:57,471 --> 00:04:58,907
Thanks.
136
00:04:58,907 --> 00:05:00,343
Do you want
a free sample?
137
00:05:00,343 --> 00:05:01,997
Choose anything
you want.
138
00:05:01,997 --> 00:05:05,261
If I stick my thumb in it,
it becomes a sample.
139
00:05:05,261 --> 00:05:06,784
Nah.
140
00:05:09,047 --> 00:05:10,222
Thank you.
141
00:05:12,312 --> 00:05:14,183
What the hell is wrong
with you?
142
00:05:14,183 --> 00:05:16,141
She was into you!
Why did you ignore her?
143
00:05:16,141 --> 00:05:17,491
I'’m just not
in the right place
144
00:05:17,491 --> 00:05:18,796
to start something
with another girl.
145
00:05:18,796 --> 00:05:20,232
Well, you better get
in the right place,
146
00:05:20,232 --> 00:05:22,322
because I'’m tired
of this mopey Oliver.
147
00:05:22,322 --> 00:05:25,281
I miss my terrible,
overconfident, douchebag Oliver.
148
00:05:25,281 --> 00:05:26,761
For now, I'’m just gonna focus
on school
149
00:05:26,761 --> 00:05:28,023
and getting into Harvard.
150
00:05:28,023 --> 00:05:29,503
That'’s your dad in you
talking.
151
00:05:29,503 --> 00:05:31,243
You need to harness
your inner me and sack up.
152
00:05:31,243 --> 00:05:33,202
I don'’t need your help.
Just stay out of it.
153
00:05:33,202 --> 00:05:35,770
You can'’t just have
a work life. You need a social life!
154
00:05:35,770 --> 00:05:37,249
A social life
with boobs!
155
00:05:37,249 --> 00:05:39,687
♪
156
00:05:39,687 --> 00:05:41,210
Anna-Kat:
Happy anniversary!
157
00:05:41,210 --> 00:05:43,255
I made you this licorice cake
from scratch.
158
00:05:43,255 --> 00:05:45,606
No way.
A pre-World War II era dessert!
159
00:05:49,349 --> 00:05:51,046
Mmm.
160
00:05:51,046 --> 00:05:54,354
The frosting has the decadence
of the Roaring Twenties.
161
00:05:54,354 --> 00:05:57,444
The cake is moist and somber
like the Great Depression.
162
00:05:57,444 --> 00:05:59,576
That'’s exactly
what I was going for.
163
00:05:59,576 --> 00:06:01,839
Now, for your gift,
please sit back
164
00:06:01,839 --> 00:06:03,450
and enjoy the show.
165
00:06:06,583 --> 00:06:09,194
[ Beep ]
166
00:06:09,194 --> 00:06:11,762
[ Rapping ] ♪ My mom'’s minivan
warms me to my core ♪
167
00:06:11,762 --> 00:06:14,286
♪ I have a special secret
handshake with every door ♪
168
00:06:14,286 --> 00:06:16,463
♪ Chariot of my mother,
I could never choose another ♪
169
00:06:16,463 --> 00:06:18,726
♪ Your six cupholders make
my little heart flutter ♪
170
00:06:18,726 --> 00:06:21,206
♪ Minivan, minivan,
you taught me to love ♪
171
00:06:21,206 --> 00:06:23,252
♪ Wrapped in your seatbelt
is my favorite hug ♪
172
00:06:23,252 --> 00:06:25,602
♪ On a hot day
your AC never misses ♪
173
00:06:25,602 --> 00:06:29,563
♪ The air in my face is like
you'’re blowing me kisses ♪
174
00:06:29,563 --> 00:06:31,434
What was that?
175
00:06:31,434 --> 00:06:32,609
I wrote you a song.
176
00:06:32,609 --> 00:06:34,524
About your mother'’s car?
177
00:06:34,524 --> 00:06:37,353
My gift was super thoughtful,
and you give me this?
178
00:06:37,353 --> 00:06:39,137
It had nothing to do
with us.
179
00:06:42,793 --> 00:06:45,492
The worst part is
your flow is so fire,
180
00:06:45,492 --> 00:06:47,711
it'’s gonna be in my head
for the rest of the day!
181
00:06:47,711 --> 00:06:54,109
♪
182
00:06:54,109 --> 00:06:55,763
Thanks again
for taking me out.
183
00:06:55,763 --> 00:06:57,504
That was my first time
seeing a foreign film.
184
00:06:57,504 --> 00:06:59,506
Yeah, yeah, I gathered that
when you started
185
00:06:59,506 --> 00:07:01,856
singing the subtitles instead
of reading them to yourself.
186
00:07:01,856 --> 00:07:03,379
I thought
it was a sing-a-long.
187
00:07:03,379 --> 00:07:04,859
Well, I mean,
the good news is
188
00:07:04,859 --> 00:07:06,164
that you have
a really beautiful voice.
189
00:07:06,164 --> 00:07:07,514
Thanks.
190
00:07:10,212 --> 00:07:12,649
Sorry, I-I-I thought
you wanted to kiss me.
191
00:07:12,649 --> 00:07:14,695
Oh, I-I did!
Um, I don'’t know what happened.
192
00:07:14,695 --> 00:07:15,609
Uh, let'’s try that again.
193
00:07:15,609 --> 00:07:16,827
Oh, okay.
194
00:07:20,396 --> 00:07:23,138
Forehead, cheek.
195
00:07:23,138 --> 00:07:24,095
I'’m starting to feel like
your grandma.
196
00:07:24,095 --> 00:07:25,662
I'’m so sorry.
197
00:07:25,662 --> 00:07:27,316
I-I really don'’t know
what'’s happening.
198
00:07:27,316 --> 00:07:30,014
Taylor, you'’re getting out
of a serious relationship.
199
00:07:30,014 --> 00:07:32,887
It'’s just bad timing,
which is unfortunate for me,
200
00:07:32,887 --> 00:07:36,891
because...well,
I really like you.
201
00:07:36,891 --> 00:07:38,806
I guess call me,
you know,
202
00:07:38,806 --> 00:07:40,982
if you, uh, ever regain control
of your body, that is.
203
00:07:45,421 --> 00:07:49,643
♪
204
00:07:49,643 --> 00:07:52,907
And ever since that, Oliver'’s
confidence has been shattered.
205
00:07:52,907 --> 00:07:55,518
He even blew off Audra
who works the register.
206
00:07:55,518 --> 00:07:57,389
Oh, why?
Audra is so cute.
207
00:07:57,389 --> 00:07:59,435
He just needs a little help
getting back in the saddle.
208
00:07:59,435 --> 00:08:01,045
Maybe we can help him make
the first move.
209
00:08:01,045 --> 00:08:02,917
Ooh, that sounds good.
What'’s your plan?
210
00:08:02,917 --> 00:08:04,396
I'’m an idea person.
211
00:08:04,396 --> 00:08:05,441
I don'’t really have
a follow-through.
212
00:08:05,441 --> 00:08:07,878
-I'’m in.
-Ugh, damn it.
213
00:08:07,878 --> 00:08:09,271
I keep forgetting to move
that fourth chair.
214
00:08:09,271 --> 00:08:11,403
You need me.
Hear me out.
215
00:08:11,403 --> 00:08:13,928
I know Audra'’s last name
from the employee roster.
216
00:08:13,928 --> 00:08:15,886
So, we can find her
on Instagram
217
00:08:15,886 --> 00:08:20,238
and message her
as Oliver.
218
00:08:20,238 --> 00:08:23,285
I hate to admit it,
but I love that idea.
219
00:08:23,285 --> 00:08:25,026
All we need
is Oliver'’s password.
220
00:08:25,026 --> 00:08:28,290
Well, I'’ve got access
to his Instagram.
221
00:08:28,290 --> 00:08:30,466
He logged in on my phone once
when he misplaced his
222
00:08:30,466 --> 00:08:32,686
and thought I logged out
because "I promised."
223
00:08:32,686 --> 00:08:35,776
Promises to kids
are non-binding and hilarious.
224
00:08:37,386 --> 00:08:39,910
First thing we do is
turn off his notifications
225
00:08:39,910 --> 00:08:41,956
so he doesn'’t get any alerts
on his phone.
226
00:08:41,956 --> 00:08:44,262
This is not
my first stalking rodeo.
227
00:08:44,262 --> 00:08:45,742
Tami,
you'’ve got intelligence.
228
00:08:45,742 --> 00:08:47,265
J.D., you got style,
229
00:08:47,265 --> 00:08:49,659
and I'’ve got confidence
bordering on cockiness.
230
00:08:49,659 --> 00:08:52,401
And I'’m the guy
who doesn'’t know or respect personal boundaries.
231
00:08:52,401 --> 00:08:54,229
So I'’ve been told
in court.
232
00:08:54,229 --> 00:08:58,494
Together we make
one kick-ass 17-year-old boy!
233
00:08:58,494 --> 00:09:02,019
I'’m just gonna start things off
by saying "sup?"
234
00:09:02,019 --> 00:09:05,414
Oh, my God, she sent me
a smiley-face emoji.
235
00:09:05,414 --> 00:09:07,329
She likes me. Us.
236
00:09:07,329 --> 00:09:09,070
-Oliver.
-Oh. Right.
237
00:09:09,070 --> 00:09:10,811
I forgot what we were doing
for a second.
238
00:09:17,295 --> 00:09:19,471
What are you doing
with Franklin'’s present?
239
00:09:19,471 --> 00:09:20,647
You worked so hard
on it.
240
00:09:20,647 --> 00:09:21,909
Yeah, that'’s the point.
241
00:09:21,909 --> 00:09:23,519
I worked so hard on his
242
00:09:23,519 --> 00:09:26,174
and he didn'’t work hard on mine
at all.
243
00:09:26,174 --> 00:09:29,481
He wrote me a rap song
about his mother'’s car.
244
00:09:29,481 --> 00:09:31,571
I didn'’t like it,
so he just took off.
245
00:09:31,571 --> 00:09:34,356
Honey,
sometimes in relationships
246
00:09:34,356 --> 00:09:36,314
you got to fake it
a little bit.
247
00:09:36,314 --> 00:09:37,881
Let me show you
something.
248
00:09:41,755 --> 00:09:43,365
These are all gifts
that your father gave me
249
00:09:43,365 --> 00:09:45,454
that I cannot stand.
250
00:09:45,454 --> 00:09:49,023
Some sonnets written in
calligraphy all titled "Katie,"
251
00:09:49,023 --> 00:09:51,242
twenty-six journals
that I will never use,
252
00:09:51,242 --> 00:09:53,070
coasters with
my kids'’ faces on them.
253
00:09:53,070 --> 00:09:54,637
We gave you those.
254
00:09:54,637 --> 00:09:57,771
The point is,
he'’s a horrible gift giver.
255
00:09:57,771 --> 00:10:00,382
But also a great guy
256
00:10:00,382 --> 00:10:03,080
who might be the most genuine
man I have ever met.
257
00:10:04,386 --> 00:10:06,040
Greg: Hey.
258
00:10:06,040 --> 00:10:08,303
I, Randall Stocktin,
mail carrier,
259
00:10:08,303 --> 00:10:10,131
am off to ruin
a man'’s life!
260
00:10:13,482 --> 00:10:14,526
Anyway...
261
00:10:14,526 --> 00:10:19,096
♪
262
00:10:21,316 --> 00:10:22,926
Nothing like getting
your toesees pampered
263
00:10:22,926 --> 00:10:24,580
after a long day
of delivering the mail.
264
00:10:30,238 --> 00:10:32,501
I still have to take this last
one all the way to Westport.
265
00:10:32,501 --> 00:10:35,939
Boy, is that town boring
and full of idiots, eh?
266
00:10:35,939 --> 00:10:38,638
Sorry, I'’m here to enjoy
my massage in peace,
267
00:10:38,638 --> 00:10:41,249
not chit chat
with a stranger.
268
00:10:41,249 --> 00:10:44,208
Well, let'’s get
to know each other better so we'’re not strangers.
269
00:10:44,208 --> 00:10:46,646
My favorite fast track
to friendship is admitting secrets.
270
00:10:46,646 --> 00:10:48,169
I'’ll go first.
271
00:10:48,169 --> 00:10:50,171
I open Christmas cards
before I deliver them.
272
00:10:50,171 --> 00:10:52,086
Makes me feel like
I have a family.
273
00:10:52,086 --> 00:10:55,480
-Now you go.
-Not interested.
274
00:10:55,480 --> 00:10:57,047
Come on,
it could be anything.
275
00:10:57,047 --> 00:10:58,353
Maybe you enjoy littering.
276
00:10:58,353 --> 00:11:00,181
Or, I don'’t know,
totally random,
277
00:11:00,181 --> 00:11:02,923
maybe you hate Westport
as much as I do.
278
00:11:02,923 --> 00:11:03,924
What did you say
your name was?
279
00:11:03,924 --> 00:11:05,142
Randall Stocktin.
280
00:11:05,142 --> 00:11:07,449
Well, you know what,
Randall?
281
00:11:07,449 --> 00:11:09,016
You kind of remind me
of somebody.
282
00:11:09,016 --> 00:11:11,192
Uh, uh, really?
283
00:11:11,192 --> 00:11:12,454
Who?
284
00:11:12,454 --> 00:11:13,977
My mother.
285
00:11:13,977 --> 00:11:15,631
She also thinks I care
about her thoughts
286
00:11:15,631 --> 00:11:17,328
and talks too much.
287
00:11:17,328 --> 00:11:20,244
Now, if you'’ll excuse me,
you'’ve ruined my massage.
288
00:11:27,730 --> 00:11:29,384
[ Sniffs ] Mmm!
289
00:11:29,384 --> 00:11:32,474
I love the smell
of fresh mail.
290
00:11:32,474 --> 00:11:35,477
[ Sniffs ] Mail.
291
00:11:35,477 --> 00:11:38,175
You know what? Tack on
an extra fifty for yourself.
292
00:11:38,175 --> 00:11:40,134
That'’s my work card,
so I won'’t feel it.
293
00:11:42,005 --> 00:11:45,879
Lonnie, that'’s a city credit
card for town use only.
294
00:11:45,879 --> 00:11:48,490
Bruh, he'’s paying for these
massages with taxpayer dollars!
295
00:11:48,490 --> 00:11:50,361
And we got it all on tape!
He'’s so busted!
296
00:11:50,361 --> 00:11:52,233
Yeah, he is![ Both laugh ]
297
00:11:52,233 --> 00:11:54,714
Alright, I got to bail.
I got a 4:30 mammogram.
298
00:11:54,714 --> 00:11:57,107
♪
299
00:11:57,107 --> 00:11:59,240
I really thought I wanted to be
with Andre,
300
00:11:59,240 --> 00:12:01,198
but when we went to kiss,
something felt off,
301
00:12:01,198 --> 00:12:03,113
and I-I couldn'’t
go through with it.
302
00:12:03,113 --> 00:12:04,941
Well, you'’ve been
in a relationship
303
00:12:04,941 --> 00:12:06,813
since the beginning
-of high school. -That'’s true.
304
00:12:06,813 --> 00:12:09,598
Maybe you want a chance
to be independent.
305
00:12:09,598 --> 00:12:12,166
Do a little self-discovery.
Hang out with some girlfriends.
306
00:12:12,166 --> 00:12:14,168
Find a hobby.
Take in a sunset.
307
00:12:14,168 --> 00:12:15,996
Wow.
That'’s actually great advice.
308
00:12:15,996 --> 00:12:17,084
Yeah.
309
00:12:17,084 --> 00:12:18,694
I got it
from "Eat, Pray, Love."
310
00:12:18,694 --> 00:12:20,609
The movie, obviously.
311
00:12:20,609 --> 00:12:22,393
Mama don'’t read.
312
00:12:22,393 --> 00:12:27,921
♪
313
00:12:30,662 --> 00:12:37,191
♪
314
00:12:39,193 --> 00:12:46,026
♪
315
00:12:47,810 --> 00:12:49,812
I'’m still thinking about
that cute checkout girl
316
00:12:49,812 --> 00:12:51,248
from Stewart and Kingston'’s.
317
00:12:51,248 --> 00:12:53,207
That'’s weird.
Do I need to tell Dad?
318
00:12:53,207 --> 00:12:54,861
I think you two
would hit it off.
319
00:12:54,861 --> 00:12:56,819
Mom, stop meddling.
I'’m not gonna ask her out.
320
00:12:56,819 --> 00:12:58,429
You don'’t have to,
321
00:12:58,429 --> 00:13:00,344
'’cause I did
and she'’s coming over to hang.
322
00:13:00,344 --> 00:13:02,085
Tell me you did not call a girl
from my school
323
00:13:02,085 --> 00:13:03,304
and ask her out for me.
324
00:13:03,304 --> 00:13:06,437
Of course not,
that would be crazy.
325
00:13:06,437 --> 00:13:08,091
I just used
your Instagram account
326
00:13:08,091 --> 00:13:10,311
and had Tami, J.D., and Walker
help me impersonate you.
327
00:13:10,311 --> 00:13:12,226
You'’ve done some
messed up stuff in your time,
328
00:13:12,226 --> 00:13:14,141
but this is
borderline psychotic!
329
00:13:14,141 --> 00:13:15,577
You think?
330
00:13:15,577 --> 00:13:17,144
I literally said
I do not need your help!
331
00:13:17,144 --> 00:13:19,363
Which is a classic cry
for help!
332
00:13:19,363 --> 00:13:22,149
All I did was invite
a beautiful girl to come over
333
00:13:22,149 --> 00:13:24,412
and possibly make out with you
on the couch.
334
00:13:24,412 --> 00:13:27,632
I am sorry that I am the
greatest wing-woman of all time.
335
00:13:27,632 --> 00:13:29,809
When will you stop meddling
in my life?!
336
00:13:29,809 --> 00:13:31,549
Never.
337
00:13:31,549 --> 00:13:34,552
I'’m gonna message Audra
right now and call it off.
338
00:13:34,552 --> 00:13:36,032
[ Doorbell rings ]
339
00:13:36,032 --> 00:13:37,729
You can'’t,
'’cause she'’s already here.
340
00:13:40,384 --> 00:13:42,691
Oh, and just a heads up
in case she mentions it,
341
00:13:42,691 --> 00:13:45,433
in the Nicki-Cardi B fight,
you'’re team Nicki!
342
00:13:50,003 --> 00:13:51,918
Okay, now you go.
343
00:13:51,918 --> 00:13:55,965
I'’d marry Pikachu,
kiss Lucario, and kill Greninja.
344
00:13:55,965 --> 00:13:57,706
That is
such a good answer.
345
00:13:57,706 --> 00:13:59,229
[ Chuckles ]
So, what should we do next?
346
00:13:59,229 --> 00:14:00,230
Want to watch a movie?
347
00:14:00,230 --> 00:14:01,884
Uh, yeah, sounds good.
348
00:14:01,884 --> 00:14:03,059
I actually haven'’t seen
your favorite movie,
349
00:14:03,059 --> 00:14:04,321
so do you want
to watch that?
350
00:14:04,321 --> 00:14:06,236
Right.
My favorite movie.
351
00:14:06,236 --> 00:14:09,413
I'’d love to show you
my favorite movie.
352
00:14:09,413 --> 00:14:11,198
Okay, what did we say
his favorite movie was?
353
00:14:11,198 --> 00:14:14,201
That was me.
354
00:14:14,201 --> 00:14:17,117
I'’m trying to remember where
we can stream my favorite movie.
355
00:14:17,117 --> 00:14:19,597
Which is obviously...
356
00:14:19,597 --> 00:14:20,511
[ Cellphone vibrates ]
357
00:14:22,122 --> 00:14:23,471
..."Little Women."
358
00:14:23,471 --> 00:14:24,951
See, we got this!
359
00:14:24,951 --> 00:14:26,256
Why "Little Women"?
360
00:14:26,256 --> 00:14:28,345
J.D. is a big
Timothée Chalamet-head.
361
00:14:28,345 --> 00:14:29,999
Ah,
it'’s pronounced Timo-tay,
362
00:14:29,999 --> 00:14:31,261
and he'’s on his way
to an Oscar,
363
00:14:31,261 --> 00:14:33,046
so let'’s try
to be better, okay?
364
00:14:33,046 --> 00:14:34,917
And how funny is it that
we have the same favorite snack?
365
00:14:34,917 --> 00:14:36,440
-So funny.
-Yeah.
366
00:14:36,440 --> 00:14:39,356
Let me get our favorite snack
for us to eat
367
00:14:39,356 --> 00:14:41,141
while we watch
my favorite movie.
368
00:14:41,141 --> 00:14:44,013
That would be my favorite,
Hot Cheetos.
369
00:14:44,013 --> 00:14:45,710
But now he'’s gonna eat
my Cheetos.
370
00:14:45,710 --> 00:14:47,060
Ugh, I didn'’t think this
through.
371
00:14:48,931 --> 00:14:49,976
[ Both sigh ]
372
00:14:49,976 --> 00:14:51,368
[ Luthor whimpers ]
373
00:14:51,368 --> 00:14:52,587
[ Laughs ]
374
00:14:52,587 --> 00:14:55,242
Oh, he'’s so cute.
375
00:14:55,242 --> 00:14:57,505
Did you get him before or after
the loss of Mr. Slytherin?
376
00:14:57,505 --> 00:14:59,550
[ Chuckles ]
377
00:14:59,550 --> 00:15:00,508
Mr. Slytherin?
378
00:15:00,508 --> 00:15:01,770
-Not it!
-Not it!
379
00:15:01,770 --> 00:15:03,728
-Walker!
-Yeah, that was me.
380
00:15:03,728 --> 00:15:06,253
Mr. Slytherin is his pet
snake that died.
381
00:15:06,253 --> 00:15:08,124
It'’s good to play
the sympathy card.
382
00:15:08,124 --> 00:15:10,605
That was taken from my own life
by the way, so it'’s personal.
383
00:15:10,605 --> 00:15:12,476
You'’re welcome.
384
00:15:12,476 --> 00:15:14,000
Ugh.
385
00:15:14,000 --> 00:15:15,044
Why not get
French fries?
386
00:15:17,090 --> 00:15:19,570
The loss of any living thing
is tough.
387
00:15:19,570 --> 00:15:22,878
I bet. And he died
in such an unusual way.
388
00:15:22,878 --> 00:15:24,445
Oh, yeah.
It was crazy.
389
00:15:24,445 --> 00:15:26,882
-Yeah.
-I'’m still waiting to process it!
390
00:15:28,623 --> 00:15:30,233
[ Cellphone chimes ]
391
00:15:32,583 --> 00:15:35,064
Why did I just get a DM
from you that said,
392
00:15:35,064 --> 00:15:38,067
"The snake died
on a roller coaster"?
393
00:15:38,067 --> 00:15:39,721
[ Groans ]
What did you do?!
394
00:15:39,721 --> 00:15:41,549
I popped
into the wrong window
395
00:15:41,549 --> 00:15:43,943
and texted her Instagram
instead of Oliver.
396
00:15:43,943 --> 00:15:47,033
Oh, this is why the youngest
person should handle the phone.
397
00:15:47,033 --> 00:15:48,817
You'’re DMing me
right now,
398
00:15:48,817 --> 00:15:50,950
but you'’re sitting
in front of me.
399
00:15:50,950 --> 00:15:52,690
What --
What is going on?
400
00:15:52,690 --> 00:15:54,083
[ Cellphone vibrates ]
401
00:15:57,565 --> 00:15:59,088
I'’m gonna be honest.
402
00:15:59,088 --> 00:16:00,960
My mom'’s the one
who'’s been DMing you.
403
00:16:00,960 --> 00:16:03,484
I'’ve been DMing
your mother?!
404
00:16:03,484 --> 00:16:05,573
Well, yes.
405
00:16:05,573 --> 00:16:08,532
And also her best friend
and this new guy she just met.
406
00:16:08,532 --> 00:16:10,665
And some creepy weirdo
at Stewart and Kingston'’s.
407
00:16:10,665 --> 00:16:12,188
Walker?!
408
00:16:12,188 --> 00:16:14,277
That is
seriously messed up!
409
00:16:14,277 --> 00:16:15,496
I-I am out of here!
410
00:16:15,496 --> 00:16:17,672
Audra, wait!
411
00:16:17,672 --> 00:16:18,542
I can explain!
412
00:16:18,542 --> 00:16:19,804
I think.
413
00:16:19,804 --> 00:16:21,632
[ Door opens, slams ]
414
00:16:21,632 --> 00:16:24,157
This is where Keith Morrison
is gonna stand
415
00:16:24,157 --> 00:16:26,463
when he discusses me
murdering you on "Dateline."
416
00:16:26,463 --> 00:16:27,769
Mm.
417
00:16:27,769 --> 00:16:29,640
♪
418
00:16:29,640 --> 00:16:31,425
Audra, I'’m so sorry.
419
00:16:31,425 --> 00:16:33,731
I-I swear
this was not my idea.
420
00:16:33,731 --> 00:16:35,081
I was
getting over someone
421
00:16:35,081 --> 00:16:36,647
and my mom gets too involved
in my life,
422
00:16:36,647 --> 00:16:38,127
even when
I tell her not to.
423
00:16:40,042 --> 00:16:41,913
But in this case,
I'’m glad she did,
424
00:16:41,913 --> 00:16:43,306
because if she didn'’t,
425
00:16:43,306 --> 00:16:44,046
I wouldn'’t have gotten
to know you.
426
00:16:46,135 --> 00:16:48,833
Believe it or not,
I can totally relate.
427
00:16:48,833 --> 00:16:50,531
-Really?
-Yeah.
428
00:16:50,531 --> 00:16:52,054
Um...
[ Clears throat ]
429
00:16:52,054 --> 00:16:54,361
See that, uh, parked car
over there
430
00:16:54,361 --> 00:16:56,232
with the woman hiding behind
the steering wheel?
431
00:16:56,232 --> 00:16:58,539
[ Chuckles ]
That'’s my mother.
432
00:16:58,539 --> 00:16:59,931
Yeah.
[ Laughs ]
433
00:16:59,931 --> 00:17:02,760
Sounds like we already have
so much in common.
434
00:17:02,760 --> 00:17:04,936
[ Cellphone chimes ]
435
00:17:04,936 --> 00:17:07,287
Uh, your mom
just texted me,
436
00:17:07,287 --> 00:17:09,332
"Make the first move
because he won'’t."
437
00:17:09,332 --> 00:17:10,638
Katie: I'’m not wrong!
438
00:17:10,638 --> 00:17:14,207
♪
439
00:17:14,207 --> 00:17:16,078
[ Sighs ] When are you leaking
the Hobert dirt?
440
00:17:16,078 --> 00:17:17,819
-Soon.
-This is gonna be big.
441
00:17:17,819 --> 00:17:20,387
Like lose your marriage,
live in your car big.
442
00:17:20,387 --> 00:17:21,953
Destroyyyyedd!
443
00:17:21,953 --> 00:17:23,216
Yeah,
that sounds fantastic.
444
00:17:23,216 --> 00:17:24,086
Are you thinking
of backing out?
445
00:17:24,086 --> 00:17:25,566
No, no, I'’m not.
446
00:17:25,566 --> 00:17:26,654
Yeah, yeah, I am.
447
00:17:26,654 --> 00:17:28,090
You'’re just a good guy.
448
00:17:28,090 --> 00:17:29,918
That'’s just who you are.
449
00:17:29,918 --> 00:17:31,180
It'’s not my favorite thing
about you,
450
00:17:31,180 --> 00:17:32,616
but it'’s not
my least favorite.
451
00:17:32,616 --> 00:17:33,617
-Guess what is.
-My pants?
452
00:17:33,617 --> 00:17:34,575
Yeah, dawg!
453
00:17:34,575 --> 00:17:37,621
♪
454
00:17:37,621 --> 00:17:39,493
Franklin?
455
00:17:39,493 --> 00:17:42,017
Your mom just told me
you were in the hospital.
456
00:17:42,017 --> 00:17:44,280
Yeah.
Sorry for missing your calls.
457
00:17:44,280 --> 00:17:46,065
I had an allergic reaction
to the licorice cake.
458
00:17:46,065 --> 00:17:47,936
Oh, my God!
459
00:17:47,936 --> 00:17:50,417
How did you not know
you were allergic to licorice?
460
00:17:50,417 --> 00:17:52,897
Oh, I knew, but you worked
so hard on the cake.
461
00:17:52,897 --> 00:17:55,074
Obviously I'’d roll the dice
on a near-death experience
462
00:17:55,074 --> 00:17:56,510
over hurting
your feelings.
463
00:17:56,510 --> 00:17:58,338
That is so sweet.
464
00:17:58,338 --> 00:18:00,383
Is that why you left
without saying anything?
465
00:18:00,383 --> 00:18:03,430
Yeah, my tongue
started swelling pretty quickly.
466
00:18:03,430 --> 00:18:05,823
Once it feels
like a sweet potato, I know it'’s time to jet.
467
00:18:05,823 --> 00:18:07,434
I wish
you'’d said something.
468
00:18:07,434 --> 00:18:09,000
All this whole time,
I thought you were mad at me
469
00:18:09,000 --> 00:18:10,567
because I didn'’t like
your rap.
470
00:18:10,567 --> 00:18:11,916
I mean, I liked it.
471
00:18:11,916 --> 00:18:13,657
I just thought
for an anniversary gift,
472
00:18:13,657 --> 00:18:15,268
it was...confusing.
473
00:18:15,268 --> 00:18:17,357
The worst part
about choking on my tongue
474
00:18:17,357 --> 00:18:19,533
was that I didn'’t get a chance
to explain.
475
00:18:19,533 --> 00:18:22,449
The minivan is where we shared
that piece of gum, boo.
476
00:18:22,449 --> 00:18:24,799
I love that car
because it reminds me of you.
477
00:18:24,799 --> 00:18:26,409
Oh, man!
More bars!
478
00:18:26,409 --> 00:18:27,628
I'’ve got to get back
in the studio.
479
00:18:27,628 --> 00:18:33,982
♪
480
00:18:33,982 --> 00:18:35,549
[ Sighs ]
481
00:18:35,549 --> 00:18:49,040
♪
482
00:18:50,303 --> 00:18:52,740
One cheeseburger taco,
please.
483
00:18:52,740 --> 00:18:55,221
[ Indistinct conversations ]
484
00:18:57,788 --> 00:18:59,399
Trip?
485
00:18:59,399 --> 00:19:00,922
Taylor?
486
00:19:00,922 --> 00:19:01,923
What are you
doing here?
487
00:19:01,923 --> 00:19:04,055
I-I don'’t know.
488
00:19:04,055 --> 00:19:06,536
This is kind of
our happy place.
489
00:19:06,536 --> 00:19:08,408
I mean, remember how psyched
you were
490
00:19:08,408 --> 00:19:10,758
the first time you had
your first cheeseburger taco?
491
00:19:10,758 --> 00:19:13,021
If the cheeseburger taco
could happen,
492
00:19:13,021 --> 00:19:15,806
then anything
is possible.
493
00:19:15,806 --> 00:19:18,200
I really missed you,
494
00:19:18,200 --> 00:19:20,420
and through our time apart,
I realized
495
00:19:20,420 --> 00:19:22,726
the only person
I ever want to be with is you.
496
00:19:24,859 --> 00:19:26,469
Break over?
497
00:19:26,469 --> 00:19:28,645
I'’m sorry, I actually need
a little more time.
498
00:19:35,609 --> 00:19:37,437
Okay,
that'’s enough time.
499
00:19:37,437 --> 00:19:38,307
Break over.
500
00:19:44,313 --> 00:19:47,360
I have to admit,
I did enjoy my time alone.
501
00:19:47,360 --> 00:19:49,579
I really dug down deep
and found myself.
502
00:19:49,579 --> 00:19:51,538
Yeah, it was a long afternoon
for me too.
503
00:19:53,670 --> 00:19:56,238
Look at that.
504
00:19:56,238 --> 00:19:58,240
We made our way back.
505
00:19:58,240 --> 00:20:04,942
♪
506
00:20:04,942 --> 00:20:06,944
This is
the best day ever!
507
00:20:06,944 --> 00:20:08,294
[ Both laugh ]
508
00:20:08,294 --> 00:20:13,429
♪
509
00:20:13,429 --> 00:20:17,128
[ Sighs ]
510
00:20:17,128 --> 00:20:19,740
I'’m sorry for hacking
into your account.
511
00:20:19,740 --> 00:20:22,960
You should be, because
you created a huge mess.
512
00:20:22,960 --> 00:20:24,701
But I know you were just
giving me the nudge I needed
513
00:20:24,701 --> 00:20:26,137
to get
my confidence back.
514
00:20:26,137 --> 00:20:27,748
What I'’m hearing is,
it all worked out
515
00:20:27,748 --> 00:20:29,228
because I got involved.
516
00:20:29,228 --> 00:20:30,968
No, it worked out
because she realized
517
00:20:30,968 --> 00:20:32,405
what an awesome guy
I am.
518
00:20:32,405 --> 00:20:33,884
There'’s
my arrogant douchebag.
519
00:20:33,884 --> 00:20:35,146
[ Scoffs ]
520
00:20:35,146 --> 00:20:37,105
[ Laughs ]
521
00:20:42,284 --> 00:20:44,286
♪
522
00:20:44,286 --> 00:20:47,550
Hobert decided
to drop out of the race.
523
00:20:47,550 --> 00:20:49,030
-Look at that!
-Huh.
524
00:20:49,030 --> 00:20:50,640
Justice prevailed
and you didn'’t even
525
00:20:50,640 --> 00:20:51,902
have to use that dirt
on him.
526
00:20:51,902 --> 00:20:54,253
Yeah,
he just decided to --
527
00:20:54,253 --> 00:20:56,994
Lonnie,
what did you do?
528
00:20:56,994 --> 00:20:59,954
How dare you, sir.
529
00:20:59,954 --> 00:21:02,652
Okay, I just showed Hobert
the video
530
00:21:02,652 --> 00:21:04,350
and he decided, all on his own,
that it was best
531
00:21:04,350 --> 00:21:05,655
for him to drop
out of the race,
532
00:21:05,655 --> 00:21:08,658
which is good for Westport
and good for you.
533
00:21:08,658 --> 00:21:10,486
And we got
to play dress up.
534
00:21:10,486 --> 00:21:12,096
There ya go!
535
00:21:12,096 --> 00:21:13,794
How about we dress up
like a couple of 80-year-olds
536
00:21:13,794 --> 00:21:15,448
and go take
a water aerobics class at the Y?
537
00:21:15,448 --> 00:21:16,840
I'’m not gonna do that.
538
00:21:16,840 --> 00:21:18,973
Well,
you know where I'’ll be.
539
00:21:18,973 --> 00:21:20,888
[ Laughs ]
540
00:21:20,888 --> 00:21:22,368
♪
541
00:21:22,418 --> 00:21:26,968
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