Original subtitles

Jacques, you are my guest today.

Yes.

You are a school teacher, you like nature

you are a keen talk-show viewer

and you collect Russian watches from the 70's.

Yes, exactly.

You are 54 years old.

Yes, that is true.

- You are a widower. - Yes.

Do you believe in god?

If you mean an old guy with a beard

who lives in the clouds... no.

Okay.

What are your goals in life?

To be happy. That's the main thing.

Also I have a special project that I'm quite keen on.

I would like to start my own line of sports clothes.

Interesting.

Please tell us a little bit about the dessert that you have chosen.

We are all very impatient and very much listening.

Uh, yes, I have chosen the strawberry Charlotte.

And tell us in a few words why you have chosen the strawberry Charlotte.

Well, it is a very simple cake

and very easy to make. Um..

What the fuck?

And the ingredients are very inexpensive

and they are not so gross to touch

very well.

This is no good, cut.

Dennis, why do you keep scratching yourself?

It's getting worse and worse!

What, what?

You've been scratching yourself like a dog

for the last three days. What's up?

Oh, it's nothing.

It's just a few rashes, it will go away.

Rashes from what?

Uh, you know, I thinks it's an eczema breakout or something

but it's actually kind of all over, it's itching like hell.

But you can't see it on camera, can you?

We can see it on camera, it's gross.

How do you expect to make people want to cook?

You look like a leper!

I don't know, it's actually probably the costume I think.

You know, Suzy changed the detergent from what she normally uses so

I guess I have sensitive skin and I've had a little bit of allergic reaction.

So, I don't know, that's all.

I have asked her to go back to the old stuff and she said no

there you go, I don't know, I don't like to tell, but that's what has happened.

Alright, listen, we're gonna to finish like this for the rest of the day.

We don't really have a choice, so just..

And go see a specialist. don't stay like this.

Yeah, yeah, I promise, I will do it.

Okay, let's go.

Okay.

Put your head back on.

Got it. Yeah. I'm ready.

You know I was thinking of something.

What if I grab your arms from behind but really discreetly

as soon as I see you starting to itch and then I can hold them

there and that'll help.

Yeah, yeah, Jacques!

You know, thanks a lot but, uh, you just focus on being a guest alright.

This is complicated enough as it is.

Okay, let's go again people right away.

Denis, whenever you're ready.

Yeah, okay, I'm ready. Alright, lets..

Okay.

So, the strawberry Charlotte..

What are those sticky things in the tummy for, daddy?

Nothing at all.

That's why I'm takin' it all out, honey.

I already told you about this.

It's the same for all the animals.

The insides serve no purpose.

Yeah. Ah!

Reality! don't touch that, it's disgusting.

Now go wash your hands we're about to eat.

Okay.

You're a real pain!

I did not change detergents!

How many times do I need to tell you?

You know I'm right, don't think I'm an idiot.

It smells different. I noticed the smell on the first day.

You're completely crazy, you have a real problem!

Yeah, I have a problem, I'll show you. I don't think you realize! Look. See?

Rashes all over my arms. Rashes everywhere!

I mean, look! See! It itches so much I can't sleep at night!

Look at what your shitty detergent is doing to me!

Alright? I'm being eaten all over! See?

But there's nothing at all.

What are you talking about? There's nothing there!

Nothing there?

Look at this. You see?

I mean, all of my skin is covered in bumps!

All that so you can save a couple bucks on a pack of detergent.

And look at the result.

I can't even wear a t-shirt anymore because of you!

Everything okay here? What's the matter?

You know the matter is that this bitch won't listen to me

and go back to our old detergent!

This bitch?

Yeah, that's what I said, yeah. Bitch!

Okay, listen to me, this is going to be very simple.

From now on, you can wash your own stupid costume, is that what you want?

Sure, yeah! Whatever, fine.

- Yeah? - Yeah.

- Yeah? - Yeah.

Well, good luck.

Okay fine, I'll do my own laundry.

It's not a big deal.

Um, oh, yeah.

We got some letters for you. Mainly complaints.

About what?

Well, about you scratching yourself.

Apparently it doesn't look good and the fans are not happy.

Okay, I get it. I'll go and see a specialist.

Hey!

I was real careful not to film your hands earlier.

And after a while I had the idea to zoom in

on your face as much as possible

and it really worked. We couldn't see you scratching yourself

all we would see was your head.

That's nice. But there are three other cameras.

Forget it. It was a nice thought anyway, but thanks.

Also, I wanted to ask.

You started off as an actor, didn't you?

- Nope, not at all. - No. Shit.

Wait. Why? What difference does that make?

No, I was just thinking, as I am about to make a movie..

I'm going to have loads of little parts to fill so

as you came across great on camera, close-ups, you know

I was thinking maybe suggesting, but I guess not.

- Well, no. - Okay. No problem.

There you go.

Yeah. See you tomorrow then.

Why was there a videotape in the hog?

What are you talkin' about, darling?

Well, I saw a videotape come out earlier, when daddy was emptying the insides.

Stop talking nonsense.

Come on, eat.

But it's true. I saw it.

No.

Listen, there can't be videotapes inside the tummy of animals, darling.

It simply is impossible.

Reality, my sweetie pie, listen to me.

How could a hog swallow a videotape?

It's much too big, it wouldn't go down, it's just not possible!

Well maybe that's what killed him.

He choked on the tape and tried to swallow it

but it got stuck in his throat.

No, he died because I shot him, honey.

And even if he did swallow the tape, it would have been completely crushed up

by his chewing it, you see?

I mean, he wouldn't have swallowed it in one piece.

Think about it!

Well, I don't know how it's possible, but I saw it.

I'm not crazy!

I think you're just tired.

Come on, it's time for you to go to bed.

Come with mommy.

Come on.

Think about it, honey.

After having dinner with her parents

the little girl quietly brushed her teeth

looking at herself in the mirror

thinking back on her day.

She put on her favorite pajamas

"got into her cozy, little bed

"convinced she had seen that tape

"come out of the tummy of the hog.

That night the little girl had funny nightmares."

That's it.

- I like this book. - I know.

It's time for you to go to bed. It's late.

Goodnight.

I saw that tape.

Tell Zog he's wasting film. He shoots too much.

He'll push us over budget.

I'll tell him.

Mr. Marshall says that you must reduce your consumption

of film or else you'll go over budget.

You tell him that it is very tricky to film children.

Reality is only 7, it's the first time she's been in a movie.

I have to adapt to her rhythms.

He says filming kids is tricky.

That's no excuse.

Why keep on filming such a crappy shot?

The kid's just lying in bed! Why film her?

He is asking why the camera is still rolling for such a crappy shot?

I was simply waiting for her to fall asleep.

I think she was struggling to fall asleep because of the lights

and the presence of the crew, and it's not a crappy shot

it is a crucial moment.

She gently falls asleep and her nightmare begins.

He was waiting for her to fall asleep.

Why?

She doesn't have to sleep! It's a movie.

She can fake it. That's what movies are!

It costs money to keep rolling, dammit!

Mr. Marshall, your appointment is here.

Yes.

I'll see him when we're done. Have him wait in my office.

Very good, sir.

Give him a fruit.

Certainly.

There you go. She falls asleep. For real.

She falls asleep for real.

About time!

I'm all yours.

- How are you doing? - Perfect.

How long's it been?

Ten years?

That's right!

You've hardly changed physically,

I dyed my hair, that's all.

- So? - Yes!

You've brought me something to read.

Well... No.

I finally decided to talk you through it because...

Reading makes it seem complicated.

Complicated?

What's it about, brain surgery?

No, no...

Anything but!

Good. Here.

Have a cigar.

No, thanks.

Do, please.

It's not my thing. I'm not feeling my best, either.

don't be a jerk. These little ones are tasty.

Mexican. They dry them for four years!

This beauty cost megabucks.

Really, I don't like cigars.

Have a cigarette at least. I keep them, for non-smokers.

don't be shy! I'll light it for you, see?

- Thanks. - There you go.

Aren't we more relaxed?

True.

True.

So, your movie. Tell me, when is it set?

It's set... In the present day. Right now.

Okay. Do you have a title?

Meaning what?

Waves, like "microwaves."

Okay. "Waves."

Whatever.

Carry on. It's set in the present.

Yes, smack in the present.

Stop, sorry. Give me that.

You smoke so badly, it's annoying.

- I'm not used to... - It's no fun unless you do it right.

How about we talk outside?

Some fresh air?

Yes, it's rather hot in here.

Precisely. This room is poorly aired.

I'll be on the deck, doing business with a young director.

No calls, please.

Come on.

Funny, you were the receptionist before.

Yes.

Now you're bringing me a project.

Isn't life amazing?

Give me a second.

Hey Zog!

Less film!

- What'd he say? - He said, less film.

Oh, tell him to go fuck himself. I'll film as much as I want.

He says, he will try!

We need to know what's on the tape!

- Who's he? - An ex-documentary maker.

I picked him out of the gutter.

He's a handful, but talented. His movie is stunning.

He lets the camera roll too long, but he's good.

It's hard to relax, standing up.

don't you think?

I don't know.

This is better.

I'm dying to hear what you've got.

Sit down.

- I'm dying to tell you. - Go ahead.

- It's set in the present day. - Yes!

Wait a minute. Do you smell stale tobacco?

Probably because I smoked.

- Isn't it unpleasant? - It's kind of smelly.

Makes me want to puke!

Okay, I'll shut up and listen. I’m ready to go.

Let's go!

Right. So...

Like I said, it's set in the present,

contemporary, on earth.

Here's the idea.

We don't know why, but TV sets suddenly get vicious.

Which TV sets?

All of them.

All?

All tvs, everywhere.

Every TV on earth?

Yes.

Okay, go on.

So...

People don't realize it, but...

The TV sets beam waves at them

that suck out their intelligence day after day.

They get completely stupid.

The dumber they get, the more TV they watch,

and the dumber they get, and so on.

Sci-Fi.

Right.

- That's it? - No.

That's only part one.

After that,

when the waves have made everyone on earth completely stupid,

the TV sets decide to wipe them out.

And this is where it gets exciting,

they start beaming waves that kill people.

Wow. The whole works.

Right. Everybody on earth dies.

There's nobody left. No survivors.

No hope.

"The end."

No hope? I like it.

Me too. There's usually a ray of hope. Not here.

That's my idea.

Go back to the tvs. How do they kill people?

It's a bit unclear.

It's similar to part one.

They beam very strong waves

that burn people up inside.

How do they react? What do we see on the screen?

They bleed, intensely, all over.

It's sickening. Blood spewing from their eyes, arms, chests...

Nice! I love it.

- Are they in pain? - They're in pain. Agony.

I'm impressed. I love it.

But like I said before, how do we see the pain?

Hold it! Tell me indoors, okay?

We'll have a cigar.

Come on.

- I love it. - You do?

- Really? - Really.

You're not just being polite?

No, I mean it.

Shit! It's filthy!

- Roughly, this is it. - Just a sec.

Send Daniel with a stain remover.

Something strong.

So, show me. Tell me.

That's roughly it.

- You draw like shit. - It's a diagram.

The TV beams the waves

towards the person.

He dies because of the waves.

And then... He bleeds his guts out. See?

Okay, I get it.

But look,

these wavy lines show us the beams.

Yes, it's beaming.

We can't show it on film.

You can't film invisible waves.

How will people get it?

Easy. We'll hear a humming, like a microwave.

We'll dub it in post.

[Knock on door] Okay.

Yes?

You asked for me, sir? For the rug?

It's too late, buddy. I've already cleaned it myself.

Please, shut the door, I have an appointment.

I love it.

No kidding?

I really do. It fills my head with pictures.

Tvs, waves, people bleeding,

no hope, Sci-Fi... I love it.

You couldn't make me happier. I've been working on this for years.

Can we go back to the pain?

How do we see the pain when they start spewing blood?

Tell me.

They groan, I think. With pain.

How do they groan?

They groan, I think, with pain.

I'm not sure what you mean.

Do it for me.

What?

The groan. Give me the feel of your film.

Well... I don't know...

Actually...

I haven't...

I don't know exactly...

What kind of groan it is.

To be honest, I didn't think about it.

It's a key detail.

I've been focusing on the plot, but...

You're right, I should've thought about the groans.

Jason, I know you well enough

to give it to you straight.

I like your project.

I'm game to sign.

Okay. Wow!

I don't know what to say!

don't say, listen.

I'll sign, on one condition.

Find the groan.

It's key.

I want the best groan in movie history.

Okay.

don't say, “okay.” I'm serious.

I want an Oscar for that groan.

Right.

Fuck the rest.

Do your thing with it, simplify it, I don't care.

- Wow! - I'll give you 48 hours.

Get to work. Call me when you're ready.

If I like the groan, we'll sign.

You'll make your movie.

Is it a deal?

Yes.

Yes?

Are you to old person that lives in house?

Yes.

Why should I give a shit?

And then what?

That's it. That's when I woke up

I took out my notebook and I wrote it all down

and to be honest with you, I don't know what to think about it.

What bothers you about this dream?

The military Jeep? The bouquet of flowers?

Or is it that you're dressed as a woman, tell me.

None of that.

It's just the presence of an old man in my dreams.

I'm not used to dreaming about old people.

I mean I never do that.

What does that mean?

It's really worrying me.

I don't think it means anything.

For me to be honest, what worries me, Henri

is the length of your dream.

Really? The length?

Let's say it's not really finished.

It's a very short dream.

You have got me used to more depth.

Well, yeah. I just woke up it's not my fault.

Why do you think you woke up?

In your opinion.

Try to stay focused, Henri.

Answer my question.

Why did you wake up?

I just woke up. There's no reason.

Are you at least sure you had this dream?

Think about what I just said.

I'll be back in a second.

Can you stop that moronic screaming?

I'm with a patient! What's the idea?

I'm practicing for my film.

You're a nuisance! Go away!

For god's sake!

Henri, we still have 10 minutes.

I'm good. I think we had enough for today.

I think, I bored you enough as it is.

What are you talking about?

Sit down, will you? We have to finish the session.

No. I'd rather go.

And I'll come back to you when I have more finished dream for you next time.

I can tell you're not interested in me at all today.

- Sorry. - Are you busy today?

What's your schedule?

I have to work.

You mean, recording noises?

Not just noises. There's more to it...

But whatever. Why do you ask?

You drove my patient away.

At a key moment, you distracted me and he left.

Sorry hon. I didn't think you'd hear me.

Stay in your car, please.

Okay, I understand.

All day. I finish at 6. No screams before then.

- I'll work here, no problem. - Thanks!

See you for lunch, though?

All right.

Well, okay. You can get dressed again. I've seen what I wanted to see.

Ah, what is it?

That's exactly what I thought.

It is indeed an eczema attack but on the inside.

On the inside?

Yes. On the inside of your head.

What does that mean?

Well, it means a lot of unpleasant things

that I'm just gonna keep to myself.

If you wanted a doctor's note, you came to the wrong place.

You can not play me for an idiot.

Oh, uh.. What?

Get out of my office now. Alright?

You've wasted enough of my time.

You are horrible.

Yes, I know. Thank you for reminding me.

Now, get out, don't come back.

You should be ashamed.

Yeah, exactly I am ashamed.

I can't go to the pool anymore.

People keep looking at me like I am gonna contaminate the water.

Of course I am ashamed. Look at me.

I'm sick and you know it. You've gotta help me!

I can't keep scratching myself forever, I'm gonna go crazy.

Just stop acting right now.

Because you're not believable for a second.

You don't have anything and you know that very well.

So get the hell out of here!

Or I'm gonna file a complaint.

Goodbye.

Groan 44.

Groan 45.

Groan... 47?

And now, the award for the best groan in movie history goes to...

What the fuck are you doing?

- Huh? - It's late! Stop dicking around!

I didn't notice the time.

- What a crazy dream! - Come on, I'm tired.

Listen to this crazy dream I had!

Tomorrow. I have a free slot at 11.

- Just listen, don't analyze. - Tomorrow!

Jacques, now that our audience knows you a little bit better

why don't you tell them about the dessert that you've chosen.

We are all very impatient and... and very much listening.

Uh, yes. I've chosen the strawberry Charlotte.

The strawberry Charlotte, in a few words tell us about the strawberry Charlotte.

Uh, yes. Well, um, it's a very simple cake and easy to make.

Can you hurry, sugar pie?

We're leaving in 5 minutes.

Okay. Alright.

And they are not too gross to touch..

Come on, reality, move it.

We're late.

Oh! Fuck.

God dammit.

Do we have a first aid kit?

Okay. Fuck! It hurts like hell.

What the fuck were you thinking?

- Argh, I really hurt myself. - Just...

Wait, alright?

don't move just a second.

Hello?

Um. I just spoke to Denis on the phone.

Yeah, what's up with him?

He's not getting better. He can't come in today.

And he didn't sound good at all. He was crying.

What a fucking pain in the ass.

Apparently, he is itching twice as much today.

Good morning this is your captain speaking.

The leper is not comin' in today.

Let's pack it up people, this day is over.

Shit.

Hey, hi.

What?

Yeah, we don't know each other.

I am the camera 3 operator.

- Yeah? - Yeah.

No.. I... I was just wondering..

Do you think you could do the same scream that you did earlier?

You know when you hurt yourself.

Aah! Could you do the same?

Scream exact the same scream again?

No. I don't think so.

Oh, yeah. Okay. Too bad.

You know I really hurt myself.

Are you stupid or somethin'?

No, I was just asking.

I thought your screaming was great.

Whatever.

Moron.

I'm sorry.

So, before we look in detail at its digestive system

there is something really important we need to understand.

Now, the hog is an omnivorous animal.

Does anybody know what omnivorous means?

Uh, I do.

Uh, I know, ma'am.

Okay, serge, tell us

omnivorous, that means he'll eat everything.

Good. Okay everything.

But what does everything mean?

Can you give us an example

uh, well, he can eat salad for example

okay good, salad. Uh, what else?

Rotten fruit.

Good. Rotten fruit. Uh, and?

Mushrooms.

Good. Mushrooms.

Now, some of those are what are known as plants.

But what else does it eat?

Oh, oh, um.. He also eats other animals too.

Exactly. Animals.

Okay, so this is really important to remember.

Everybody take your pens.

Good, and I want you to write... Teacher.

Yes, reality.

A hog can also swallow a videotape without damaging it.

But it's true.

Whoo-hoo!

What are you doing here?

Nothing.

You know you are not allowed in any classroom during recess, right?

You broke the rules. I am very upset

sorry, Mr. superintendent.

I promise that I won't do it again.

What was on that tape you wanted to watch?

It's a videotape I found.

It could be that there is nothing on it.

I just wanted to check.

Let me see it.

No. You'll take it away.

I just wanna see what's written on it. Give me the tape.

There's nothing written on it.

Well, I still wanna see it.

No!

You'll keep it.

And then I'll never get to see what's on it.

Reality, give me the tape or I'm gonna call your parents.

If you call my parents..

Then I'll tell everyone you dress up like a woman.

Wha.. Wha..

Me?

Are you kidding?

I saw you.

Driving a military Jeep.

Dressed like a woman.

No, you didn't.

Groan 65.

You're still at it?

I can't believe it.

I'm nearly done. Just re-listening.

Are you satisfied?

Not especially.

Did Kubrick spend hours recording himself stupid?

This is research. Why stupid?

Am I stupid?

You tell me.

Did Kubrick research his movies by taping groans in his pajamas?

I don't give a shit for Kubrick.

He works his way, I work mine.

Why shouldn't I work in pajamas?

Take it easy! I'm trying to understand.

You just look a bit silly.

Okay.

Thanks for your support!

Really!

What do I know about movies?

Kubrick, my ass!

Kubrick, my ass!

And now, the award for the best groan in movie history goes to...

Jason tantra!

I can't stand up. I can’t stand up!

I'm stuck... to the seat.

I'm stuck to the seat.

I'm stuck!

I'm stuck to the seat.

I'm stuck!

Stuck!

Dirty little fuckers!

Flaunting their boards.

Jason tantra's on the line.

What's he got?

Mr. Marshall wishes to know if you have anything.

Well no, that's the problem. I'm running around in circles.

Could you tell him I...

I lost track of what I'm looking for.

It's harder than I thought.

I'm scared I'll miss the 48-hour deadline.

Can Mr. Marshall reassure me?

Hold on.

He is working, but he's lost track.

He's running around in circles. It’s starting to scare him.

He's scared he'll go over 48 hours.

He needs reassurance.

So reassure him.

Why don’t you take a break?

It will do you good.

- You think so? - Yes.

Why not go to the pool for a change of scene?

No, but...

I don't like swimming. I'm no good at it.

Then why not a museum or a movie?

There are many enjoyable movies out.

They'll wash your brain.

Yeah, yeah... maybe.

don't stew in your own juice.

You're freaking out. It's not good.

He can have 24 more hours.

Mr. Marshall gives you 24 more hours.

Great!

I want an Oscar for the groan!

Mr. Marshall says he wants an Oscar for the groan.

I know.

That's the problem.

Cheer up.

Good luck.

But then...

How long do I have left including the bonus?

Hello.

There you go. Enjoy the movie.

What kind of movie is it?

Is it funny or more romantic?

I'm not allowed to answer that kind of question, ma'am.

You'll see. Uhhuh.

Can you move along, please. You're holding up the line.

Okay.

Okay. Hmm.

Hey.

What?

It's the title of my film.

"Waves." "Waves."

That's your "awesome" title?

Someone had the same idea.

Sure it's your title?

Yes! I know my own title.

It's "waves." Like microwaves.

It's a good time to change it. "Waves" sounds awful.

You're kidding! I love it!

Excuse me. Uh, when does this movie come out? Waves?

It's already out, sir. It's playing now.

Can you move aside please, you're blocking the other customers.

Uh, we're gonna change the tickets

because we're going to watch it instead. Is that possible?

What?

I'm sorry, it started 45 minutes ago.

Yes. It's alright. It's good.

Doesn't matter. Can we change the tickets?

As you wish.

Not if it's started and it's called "waves!”

I care about it, honey!

Please move along.

Thank you.

Next.

You're a pain!

God! It's my film!

I swear it's exactly my film.

Fuck!

Be quiet! You're disturbing everybody.

Two years of hard work!

don't blame me! I didn't want to see it.

See?

It's my film.

I can't take this.

I'm sorry. Listen to me, you can't watch this.

Uh, this film doesn't exist yet.

I am the director, it's my film.

I just finished the script and you can't watch it now.

Move!

This film doesn't really exist yet!

We haven't shot it yet.

So, you can go and see another movie. Thank you.

- Go? - The groans are bad.

They're gonna to be better when I will work on it.

So thank you, can we stop the... Get out!

- The screening? - Move it.

- Go! - Please.

The groans are... are bad.

You don't understand.

Get the fuck out of the way!

I have to work on it.

This movie doesn't really exists.

Move it.

I'm tryin' to watch the fuckin' movie.

Work on it. Find the groan.

It's key.

I want the best groan in movie history.

I'm going home. You're too embarrassing!

Thanks for the fun time!

I want the best groan in movie history.

I mean it.

I want an Oscar for it. You hear me?

Fine.

Fuck the rest.

Do your thing, simplify it, I don't care.

- I don't know what to say. - Take 48 hours.

Call me when you're ready.

If I like the groans, we'll sign,

you'll make your movie.

Is it a deal?

Great to hear you. Jason here.

- Sorry to bother... - Just a sec.

Weird! It's you on the line.

Sorry?

This is you on the line.

What do you mean? I'm here.

Where are you?

Outdoors, on the street.

An awful thing has happened. I don't know how to say it.

It's about the movie. There's a big problem.

I'm not sure how to explain what happened.

I may even pass out.

Wait! Breathe deeply, don't faint. What problem, Jason?

Who are you talking to? I'm here.

Go on.

It may sound insane,

but I just saw my movie in a theater.

What did you say?

I know it sounds crazy, but it's true.

I just saw my film in a theater with an audience.

The film exists. I saw it.

And it sucks.

He says he saw his movie, I mean your movie, and it sucks.

I had the exact same dream last night.

I saw my movie in a theater and tried to stop it.

That's it.

- My nightmare. - Listen Jason, don't panic.

You're in a bad dream.

Relax, try not to think about it

and you'll wake up.

Hello, Bob?

Hello? Hello, Bob?

Fuck!

Baby, aren't you taping?

That groan was awesome. You should tape it.

Where's the damn recorder?

Look in the lining of your jacket.

The hole, you know? Where you always lose your keys.

Ah, yes.

Got it.

Ha! Okay.

Damn.

I've stopped groaning.

What, honey?

The pain's gone.

I didn't tape the perfect groan.

Shit!

Excuse me. Hi.

Hello.

I need to borrow your rifle, just for a minute.

I'm doing research for sounds, I'm making movies.

You can take this one. It's an old thing, I don't use it much.

Be careful though. It's loaded.

Okay.

Hey!

You're going to be late for work.

Shit!

Who was that guy, daddy?

- Where? - Well, there. Outside.

You were talking to somebody.

I wasn't talking to anybody.

Go back to sleep, sugar pie.

But I wasn't sleeping.

What is that?

That must be my alarm clock.

Well turn it off! It's unbearable!

Hey! Hey!

What are you doing?

Where are going with that?

I'm going to watch the tape.

Not now.

That isn't the plan.

For now, you're sleeping.

But I am sick of sleeping!

I want to know what's on the tape!

Shh, shh, shh. You're going to wake your parents up.

Now come on, go back to bed.

I'm the one who makes the decisions, right?

I am so sick of this movie!

This sucks! What a pain!

I'd set my alarm, on purpose!

Why can't I watch the tape?

Just be a little patient. Trust me.

Come on, go back to sleep!

Nobody's gonna want to watch this scene where I am sleeping!

Nobody cares!

It's for the suspense!

Close your eyes. Sleep!

There you go. I'm sleeping.

Great movie!

Jacques, you are my guest today.

Yes.

You are a school teacher, you like nature

you are an avid viewer of talk shows

and you collect Russian watches from the 70's.

Yes. Exactly.

You are 54 years old.

Yes, that's the truth you are a widower.

Yes.

Do you believe in god?

Hmm? Yes.

Yes. Mmhmm.

So what should we begin with?

In... in your opinion?

Maybe we could wash the strawberries.

Personally, that's my favorite part.

Well, okay. Let's start.

Do you have any special technique?

Yes.

I put the strawberries in a damp cloth

and then I rub them ever so gently.

Jason, wake up! Hey! Wake up, man. We've got work to do!

- Jason! - What's going on with him?

I don't know, he just fell.

Hey everyone, I'm here!

I'm ready to shoot this, so let's..

Wake up! Hey, man, it's not nap time.

- Jason? - We got work to do.

Wake up!

- Sorry. - Up.

Hey! Come on, wake up!

Sir!

Hello.

Hey!

Woo-hoo!

Sir! Hey come on, wake up!

You're missing the movie!

Sir? Sir?

Come on, wake up!

Woo-hoo.

Wake up!

Sir? Sir?

Wake up, dammit!

I don't have time for this shit!

Come on, wake up!

Wake up!

What's... what's happening? I'm... I'm confused.

It is indeed an eczema attack, but on the inside.

On the inside of your head.

Wake up!

Hey, come on, wake up! Sir?

Come on. Wake up!

Ha!

What's the matter, dude?

Are you okay?

Yeah. I'm fine.

Hey, come on, wake up!

Sir?

Okay.

We need to talk. Uh, I think we are the same person.

I've been having some weird dreams where I'm you.

I... I don't know, I know it doesn't make any sense but..

I think we are the same person. I don't know why.

What's going on?

She's about to see what's on the videotape.

I see that, but it's badly shot!

We can't see what she's seeing. Why choose that angle?

Mr. Marshall says it is very poorly filmed.

And he wants to know why you chose this angle.

Because it's beautiful.

Because it's beautiful.

Okay, it's beautiful,

but what the fuck is she watching?

We need to know what's on the tape!

Bob wants to know what's on the tape.

He has to be patient.

He asks you to be patient.

My Patience is limited.

Does he even know what's on it? Maybe he hasn't thought it out yet.

Bob is wondering if you know what is on the tape.

I know perfectly well what is on this tape

but I'm not going to tell him before he finds out himself

it'd ruin the surprise. He has to be patient.

He says, be patient.

I'm warning you, Zog. The more I wait, the more I want.

- Hello. - Hello.

I want to be locked up.

I'm losing my grip.

I need treatment and help.

Fine. Come with me.

This way.

Here we are!

Make yourself comfortable.

- I'll be back in a minute. - Thanks.

Shall I take your gun?

Yes, sorry.

Mr. Marshall,

Jason tantra's on the line.

Will he never give up?

Keep it short, Jason. I'm busy.

Sorry to bother you.

I wanted to warn you I may be late with the groan.

What are you doing?

I have other fish to fry, dammit! I can't wait forever.

I gave you 48 hours, plus a 24 hour bonus.

You need a week to find a groan. How long to shoot a movie?

Yes, but... Everything's gone wrong.

Nothing fits. I need time to get myself together.

What doesn't fit? Are you sick?

It may sound dumb, but I'm stuck in a nightmare.

I know it.

But then again,

the good news is, if it's a nightmare I'll have to wake up.

But... I don't know when.

I can't guarantee to deliver you a groan as long as I'm stuck in the nightmare.

Good god!

Does that make sense if you're not in the nightmare?

Do you understand?

Holy shit!

Jason, I'll put you on hold...

Hang on a second.

I'm flabbergasted.

He's a genius. A fucking genius!

Bob says you are a genius.

You like it?

I don't know how to tell you, I'm flabbergasted.

It's not finished.

No, but right now I'm speechless.

My brain is in my socks as they say.

Hello.

What's that?

- A suppository, to help you sleep. - No, no...

No need. I'm in a nightmare. I'm already fast asleep.

No need for a suppository, thanks.

Come on, now. It's nothing at all.

It won't take a second.

You don't understand. I am asleep.

Anyway, can't it wait? I'm on the phone here, see?

It's not plugged in, sir.

Roll over a little. Roll over.

Please. It will help you relax.

There! Not so awful, was it?

Night-night, sleep tight!

Sleep in my nightmare?

Thanks a bunch!

I'll leave you for an hour or so.

Jason, you still there?

- Yes. - Your groan was perfect!

Your movie is a go.

We'll sign on Monday. Till then, rest up.

What?

Hello, Bob?

Bob, what groan?

There you go. That's all for today.

Incredible!

Really incredible!

So beautiful, I could cry. Let me kiss you.

Thank you.

Words fail me. I'm speechless!

Thank you.

Hey, Zog!

You're a fucking genius!

What'd he say?

He said you're a fucking genius.

Yeah.

Thanks!

His name is Zog?

Yes.

Just Zog? No surname?

Yes.

Who is he?

An ex-documentary maker.

I picked him up out of the gutter.

He's a handful,

but very talented.

His movie is stunning.

The end

Bye, Mr. Marshall. I'm very happy.

Call me Bob now. Get to work, pal.

Here I go.

- 48 hours. - Yes sir!

- Good luck. - Yes.

So... See you soon, Bob.

Yes!

So, do you have a special technique?

Yes, I put the strawberries in a damp cloth

and then I rub them ever so gently.

That way, you don't damage the skin.

You could show us, it would be easier.

Gladly.

What's happening? I'm confused.

It is indeed an eczema attack

but on the inside.

On the inside of your head.