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1
00:00:01,922 --> 00:00:04,343
We never should have
landed a man on the moon.
2
00:00:04,377 --> 00:00:05,743
It's a mistake.
3
00:00:05,777 --> 00:00:08,743
Now everything is compared
to that one accomplishment.
4
00:00:08,777 --> 00:00:11,477
Now we go, "I can't believe
they can land a man on the moon,
5
00:00:11,510 --> 00:00:13,843
and taste my coffee!"
6
00:00:13,877 --> 00:00:15,643
I think we all
would've been a lot happier
7
00:00:15,677 --> 00:00:17,577
if we hadn't landed a man
on the moon. We'd go:
8
00:00:17,610 --> 00:00:19,977
"They can't make a prescription
bottle top open easily?
9
00:00:20,010 --> 00:00:22,243
"I'm not surprised they couldn't
land man on the moon.
10
00:00:22,277 --> 00:00:25,543
Things make perfect sense
to me now."
11
00:00:25,577 --> 00:00:27,243
Neil Armstrong should've said,
12
00:00:27,277 --> 00:00:29,043
"That's one small step for man,
13
00:00:29,077 --> 00:00:30,000
"one giant leap for every
whining, complaining S.O.B.
14
00:00:30,000 --> 00:00:31,377
"one giant leap for every
whining, complaining S.O.B.
15
00:00:31,410 --> 00:00:32,543
on the face of the earth."
16
00:00:35,610 --> 00:00:38,410
[♪]
17
00:00:39,543 --> 00:00:40,510
Hey, do you believe
18
00:00:40,543 --> 00:00:42,377
I got Happy New Year-ed
today?
19
00:00:42,410 --> 00:00:44,177
It's February.
20
00:00:44,210 --> 00:00:46,977
I once got Happy New Year-ed
in March.
21
00:00:47,010 --> 00:00:49,110
Disgusting.
It's pathetic.
22
00:00:50,410 --> 00:00:51,677
Hey, is it cold out?
23
00:00:51,710 --> 00:00:52,677
Really cold.
24
00:00:52,710 --> 00:00:53,843
Scary-cold?
25
00:00:53,877 --> 00:00:56,243
What's your definition
of scary-cold?
26
00:01:03,410 --> 00:01:04,076
That.
27
00:01:04,076 --> 00:01:04,743
That.
28
00:01:06,743 --> 00:01:08,677
What is that?
29
00:01:08,710 --> 00:01:10,343
[LAUGHING]
What?
30
00:01:10,377 --> 00:01:11,543
When did you
get that?
31
00:01:11,577 --> 00:01:13,010
This week.
32
00:01:13,043 --> 00:01:15,343
My father got a deal
from a friend of his.
33
00:01:15,377 --> 00:01:17,543
It's Gore-Tex.
34
00:01:17,577 --> 00:01:19,077
You know
about Gore-Tex?
35
00:01:19,110 --> 00:01:21,010
You like saying Gore-Tex,
don't you?
36
00:01:21,043 --> 00:01:22,810
Look at you.
37
00:01:22,843 --> 00:01:25,343
You can't even turn around
in that thing.
38
00:01:25,377 --> 00:01:26,910
Look at this.
39
00:01:26,943 --> 00:01:29,810
Hey, George,
can you feel this?
40
00:01:29,843 --> 00:01:30,843
Can you?
41
00:01:32,177 --> 00:01:34,076
All right! All right!
Knock it off!
42
00:01:34,076 --> 00:01:35,143
All right! All right!
Knock it off!
43
00:01:35,177 --> 00:01:37,177
Come on, let's go.
44
00:01:37,210 --> 00:01:38,343
We should stop off on the way
45
00:01:38,377 --> 00:01:40,343
and get a bottle of wine
or something.
46
00:01:40,377 --> 00:01:41,410
What for?
47
00:01:41,443 --> 00:01:44,010
These people invited us
for dinner.
48
00:01:44,043 --> 00:01:45,410
We have to bring
something.
49
00:01:45,443 --> 00:01:47,310
Why?
50
00:01:47,343 --> 00:01:50,210
Because it's rude
otherwise?
51
00:01:50,243 --> 00:01:52,177
You mean,
just going there
52
00:01:52,210 --> 00:01:54,143
because I'm invited,
that's rude?
53
00:01:54,177 --> 00:01:55,310
Yes.
54
00:01:55,343 --> 00:01:56,377
So you're telling me,
55
00:01:56,410 --> 00:01:57,977
instead of them
being happy to see me,
56
00:01:58,010 --> 00:02:00,310
they'll be upset because
I didn't bring anything.
57
00:02:00,343 --> 00:02:01,643
You see
what I'm saying?
58
00:02:01,677 --> 00:02:04,076
The fabric of society
is very complex, George.
59
00:02:04,076 --> 00:02:04,810
The fabric of society
is very complex, George.
60
00:02:04,843 --> 00:02:07,210
I don't even
drink wine.
61
00:02:07,243 --> 00:02:08,877
I drink Pepsi.
62
00:02:08,910 --> 00:02:11,210
You can't bring
Pepsi.
63
00:02:11,243 --> 00:02:13,243
Why not?
64
00:02:13,277 --> 00:02:15,077
Because we're adults?
65
00:02:15,110 --> 00:02:16,743
What,
you're telling me
66
00:02:16,777 --> 00:02:18,410
that wine is better
than Pepsi?
67
00:02:18,443 --> 00:02:19,410
[SNORTS]
68
00:02:19,443 --> 00:02:21,643
No way wine is better
than Pepsi.
69
00:02:21,677 --> 00:02:22,810
I tell ya, George,
70
00:02:22,843 --> 00:02:24,377
I don't think we want
to walk in there
71
00:02:24,410 --> 00:02:25,810
and put a big plastic
jug of Pepsi
72
00:02:25,843 --> 00:02:27,843
in the middle
of the table.
73
00:02:27,877 --> 00:02:29,077
I just don't like
the idea
74
00:02:29,110 --> 00:02:30,877
that any time there's
a dinner invitation
75
00:02:30,910 --> 00:02:33,010
there's this annoying
little chore to go with it.
76
00:02:33,043 --> 00:02:34,076
You know,
you're getting to be
77
00:02:34,076 --> 00:02:34,310
You know,
you're getting to be
78
00:02:34,343 --> 00:02:35,910
an annoying little chore
yourself.
79
00:02:38,010 --> 00:02:40,077
All right, let's go.
Who's driving?
80
00:02:40,110 --> 00:02:43,177
You are. I can't get
that thing in my car.
81
00:02:43,210 --> 00:02:45,243
[♪]
82
00:02:45,277 --> 00:02:46,843
Where's the heat
in this car?
83
00:02:46,877 --> 00:02:48,510
Come on, Elaine.
Warm me up. It's cold.
84
00:02:48,543 --> 00:02:50,410
Jerry, get off of me.
Just a little squeeze.
85
00:02:50,443 --> 00:02:53,243
Get off!
Get off of me!
No!
86
00:02:53,277 --> 00:02:54,743
Hee, hee, hee!
87
00:02:54,777 --> 00:02:57,077
You're pretty comfortable
up there, huh, bubble boy?
88
00:02:57,110 --> 00:03:00,243
Oh, yeah. You wish
you had this coat.
89
00:03:00,277 --> 00:03:01,243
I was just thinking.
90
00:03:01,277 --> 00:03:02,477
The four of us
can't show up
91
00:03:02,510 --> 00:03:04,076
with just one
bottle of wine.
92
00:03:04,076 --> 00:03:04,243
with just one
bottle of wine.
93
00:03:04,277 --> 00:03:06,077
Oh, here we go.
What?
94
00:03:06,110 --> 00:03:07,877
Why don't we
get them a couch.
[LAUGHS]
95
00:03:07,910 --> 00:03:11,010
We'll rent a U-Haul,
bring them a nice sectional.
96
00:03:11,043 --> 00:03:12,243
We should bring
some cake.
97
00:03:12,277 --> 00:03:14,243
Will you stop off
at the bakery?
98
00:03:14,277 --> 00:03:16,710
Just get some Ring Dings
from the liquor store.
99
00:03:16,743 --> 00:03:19,043
Ring Dings?
100
00:03:19,077 --> 00:03:21,843
They're better than anything
you'll get at a bakery.
101
00:03:21,877 --> 00:03:23,477
Ooh, I like
Ring Dings.
102
00:03:23,510 --> 00:03:25,743
George, you can't show up
at someone's house
103
00:03:25,777 --> 00:03:28,310
with Ring Dings
and Pepsi.
104
00:03:28,343 --> 00:03:30,577
Hey, your lights
are on!
105
00:03:32,010 --> 00:03:34,076
It's a funeral
procession.
106
00:03:34,076 --> 00:03:36,477
It's a funeral
procession.
107
00:03:36,510 --> 00:03:37,543
I got news
for you.
108
00:03:37,577 --> 00:03:39,143
I show up with
Ring Dings and Pepsi,
109
00:03:39,177 --> 00:03:40,877
I'd become the biggest hit
of the party.
110
00:03:40,910 --> 00:03:43,010
People would say,
"Just between you and me,
111
00:03:43,043 --> 00:03:45,743
I'm really excited about
the Ring Dings and the Pepsi."
112
00:03:45,777 --> 00:03:46,977
What are we,
Europeans?
113
00:03:47,010 --> 00:03:49,843
With the Beaujolais
and the chardonnay...
114
00:03:49,877 --> 00:03:53,043
Oh. That's the bakery.
Stop here. Stop here.
Okay.
115
00:03:53,077 --> 00:03:54,210
Okay, let me out.
116
00:03:54,243 --> 00:03:55,910
You, whatever
your name is.
117
00:03:55,943 --> 00:03:57,677
Jerry.
Yeah. Jerry.
Come with me.
118
00:03:57,710 --> 00:03:58,977
So, we're gonna
get the wine.
119
00:03:59,010 --> 00:04:00,577
We'll pick you up here
in 10 minutes?
120
00:04:00,610 --> 00:04:01,843
Yeah.
All right.
121
00:04:01,877 --> 00:04:04,076
[♪]
122
00:04:04,076 --> 00:04:04,243
[♪]
123
00:04:04,277 --> 00:04:05,477
[ELAINE SNIFFS]
124
00:04:05,510 --> 00:04:08,143
Mmm. I love
the smell of bakeries.
125
00:04:08,177 --> 00:04:10,210
Oh, look. The black
and white cookie.
126
00:04:10,243 --> 00:04:11,910
I love
the black-and-white.
127
00:04:11,943 --> 00:04:13,677
Two races of flavor
128
00:04:13,710 --> 00:04:16,010
living side by side
in harmony.
129
00:04:16,043 --> 00:04:17,477
It's a wonderful
thing, isn't it?
130
00:04:17,510 --> 00:04:20,410
You know, I often wonder
what you'll be like
131
00:04:20,443 --> 00:04:21,677
when you're senile.
132
00:04:22,677 --> 00:04:23,877
I'm looking
forward to it.
133
00:04:23,910 --> 00:04:26,477
I think it'll be
a smooth transition for you.
134
00:04:26,510 --> 00:04:27,843
Thank you.
135
00:04:27,877 --> 00:04:29,743
Look at all this stuff.
What are we getting?
136
00:04:29,777 --> 00:04:32,310
Chocolate babka.
That's their specialty.
137
00:04:32,343 --> 00:04:34,076
Love that babka.
138
00:04:34,076 --> 00:04:34,210
Love that babka.
139
00:04:34,243 --> 00:04:35,577
Yeah, yeah.
140
00:04:35,610 --> 00:04:37,977
But when we get up
to the door,
141
00:04:38,010 --> 00:04:39,643
you hold
the cake box.
142
00:04:39,677 --> 00:04:40,677
Why?
143
00:04:40,710 --> 00:04:42,410
I don't know.
Just standing there,
144
00:04:42,443 --> 00:04:45,077
holding a box
by the little string...
145
00:04:45,110 --> 00:04:47,177
You think
it's effeminate?
146
00:04:47,210 --> 00:04:49,510
It's a tad dainty.
147
00:04:49,543 --> 00:04:50,543
[GASPS]
148
00:04:50,577 --> 00:04:53,477
Oh, we forgot
to pick a number.
149
00:04:53,510 --> 00:04:54,543
See,
that's not fair.
150
00:04:54,577 --> 00:04:56,877
We were here ahead
of all these people.
151
00:04:56,910 --> 00:04:58,810
You think I should go
and ask her for hers?
152
00:04:58,843 --> 00:04:59,977
Ah, no, forget it.
153
00:05:00,010 --> 00:05:01,243
No, no, no.
It's not fair!
154
00:05:01,277 --> 00:05:02,677
Just because
they have a ticket
155
00:05:02,710 --> 00:05:04,076
doesn't mean they were
here first. We were here.
156
00:05:04,076 --> 00:05:04,743
doesn't mean they were
here first. We were here.
157
00:05:04,777 --> 00:05:07,177
And we were ahead of them,
and them, and her.
158
00:05:07,210 --> 00:05:09,377
Come on, let's just
go ask them. Come on.
159
00:05:11,177 --> 00:05:13,010
Excuse me...
160
00:05:13,043 --> 00:05:15,410
KRAMER [SIGHING]:
I'm not finding a spot here.
161
00:05:15,443 --> 00:05:18,243
What do you
wanna do?
162
00:05:18,277 --> 00:05:19,910
Just double-park.
No, no.
163
00:05:19,943 --> 00:05:21,310
Why not?
I'll get a ticket.
164
00:05:21,343 --> 00:05:23,477
Besides, what if somebody
wants to get out of here?
165
00:05:23,510 --> 00:05:25,410
Are you kidding?
People get spaces this good,
166
00:05:25,443 --> 00:05:26,410
they never give them up.
167
00:05:26,443 --> 00:05:28,577
That's a fallacy.
168
00:05:28,610 --> 00:05:30,310
All right,
I tell you what.
169
00:05:30,343 --> 00:05:32,977
Why don't you go into the store.
I'll wait in the car.
170
00:05:33,010 --> 00:05:34,076
Why don't you go into the store,
and I'll wait in the car.
171
00:05:34,076 --> 00:05:35,743
Why don't you go into the store,
and I'll wait in the car.
172
00:05:35,777 --> 00:05:38,077
Because
I've got the coat.
173
00:05:38,110 --> 00:05:40,543
I can sit in the car
and not get cold.
174
00:05:40,577 --> 00:05:42,743
So what? I'm gonna leave
the car heater running.
175
00:05:42,777 --> 00:05:44,077
Does the heater even work?
176
00:05:44,110 --> 00:05:45,210
No.
177
00:05:46,710 --> 00:05:47,710
Hey, there's a spot,
178
00:05:47,743 --> 00:05:49,210
right in front
of the liquor store!
179
00:05:49,243 --> 00:05:50,210
You see?
I see.
180
00:05:50,243 --> 00:05:51,743
You see?!
Ho, ho, ho!
181
00:05:51,777 --> 00:05:54,210
[♪]
182
00:05:54,243 --> 00:05:56,310
But we were here
ahead of you!
183
00:05:56,343 --> 00:05:57,410
How do I know that?
184
00:05:57,443 --> 00:05:59,143
Well, we saw you
come in.
185
00:05:59,177 --> 00:06:01,310
Well, that's easy
for you to say.
186
00:06:01,343 --> 00:06:03,743
Yeah, right. That's something
I do all the time.
187
00:06:03,777 --> 00:06:04,076
I make up stories to get
ahead in lines at bakeries.
188
00:06:04,076 --> 00:06:06,910
I make up stories to get
ahead in lines at bakeries.
189
00:06:06,943 --> 00:06:08,343
ATTENDANT:
Forty-six!
190
00:06:11,410 --> 00:06:13,677
Wait-- Wait a second.
191
00:06:13,710 --> 00:06:15,210
Are you
Barbara Benedict?
192
00:06:15,243 --> 00:06:17,543
Yes.
193
00:06:17,577 --> 00:06:19,543
Oh, my God.
194
00:06:19,577 --> 00:06:21,810
I don't--
I-- I know you.
195
00:06:21,843 --> 00:06:23,243
I'm Elaine Benes.
196
00:06:23,277 --> 00:06:24,410
Do you remember?
197
00:06:24,443 --> 00:06:27,043
We met at Linda van Brak's
baby shower.
198
00:06:27,077 --> 00:06:29,043
I'm on my way
over there right now.
199
00:06:29,077 --> 00:06:30,210
Yeah, me too.
200
00:06:30,243 --> 00:06:34,076
You're Jerry,
right?
David.
201
00:06:34,076 --> 00:06:36,743
You're Jerry,
right?
David.
202
00:06:39,010 --> 00:06:40,877
Well, this is a little
awkward, isn't it?
203
00:06:40,910 --> 00:06:42,910
Yes, it is.
204
00:06:45,210 --> 00:06:47,910
You know, we were
here ahead of you.
205
00:06:47,943 --> 00:06:50,010
You're not getting
my number!
206
00:06:50,043 --> 00:06:51,677
Oh, so you still
don't believe us!
207
00:06:51,710 --> 00:06:52,677
Forty-seven!
208
00:06:52,710 --> 00:06:54,243
That's us!
209
00:06:54,277 --> 00:06:56,877
Oh, okay, fine.
Fine. Go ahead.
210
00:06:56,910 --> 00:06:59,010
But listen.
As soon as I get there,
211
00:06:59,043 --> 00:07:02,210
I'm gonna tell everyone
what a jerk you are.
212
00:07:02,243 --> 00:07:03,577
I'll be there ahead of you,
213
00:07:03,610 --> 00:07:04,076
and I'll be telling them
what a jerk you are!
214
00:07:04,076 --> 00:07:07,010
and I'll be telling them
what a jerk you are!
215
00:07:07,043 --> 00:07:08,877
I'll have
the chocolate babka.
216
00:07:11,277 --> 00:07:13,777
You're lucky, Mrs. Benedict.
It's our last one.
217
00:07:15,577 --> 00:07:18,077
[♪]
218
00:07:18,110 --> 00:07:20,177
All right, what
are we getting?
219
00:07:20,210 --> 00:07:23,010
It's hot in here.
220
00:07:23,043 --> 00:07:25,177
Hm. What do you say
we get a Mouton Cadet?
221
00:07:25,210 --> 00:07:26,343
What's that?
222
00:07:26,377 --> 00:07:28,143
It's a Bordeaux.
223
00:07:28,177 --> 00:07:31,543
Robust, bold,
very dry,
224
00:07:31,577 --> 00:07:33,477
as opposed to a
Beaujolais,
225
00:07:33,510 --> 00:07:34,076
which is richer
and fruitier.
226
00:07:34,076 --> 00:07:35,210
which is richer
and fruitier.
227
00:07:36,777 --> 00:07:38,877
All right, here's one.
Twelve dollars.
228
00:07:38,910 --> 00:07:41,143
Twelve dollars?!
229
00:07:41,177 --> 00:07:42,810
I knew we should've
gone to the bakery.
230
00:07:42,843 --> 00:07:45,043
I guarantee you they're not
getting no $12 cake!
231
00:07:45,077 --> 00:07:47,543
I'll pay you back later.
I don't have my wallet.
232
00:07:55,543 --> 00:07:56,843
Why not?
233
00:07:56,877 --> 00:07:59,010
'Cause I don't like
to carry my wallet.
234
00:07:59,043 --> 00:08:02,477
My osteopath says
it's bad for my spine.
235
00:08:02,510 --> 00:08:04,076
Throws my hips
off-kilter.
236
00:08:04,076 --> 00:08:04,610
Throws my hips
off-kilter.
237
00:08:06,677 --> 00:08:09,243
[MUTTERING]
Throws your hips
off-kilter.
238
00:08:09,277 --> 00:08:10,710
So where's
your money?
239
00:08:10,743 --> 00:08:12,743
I never take it.
240
00:08:12,777 --> 00:08:13,743
So, what do you do?
241
00:08:13,777 --> 00:08:15,677
Oh, I get by.
242
00:08:15,710 --> 00:08:18,077
[♪]
243
00:08:18,110 --> 00:08:19,843
See you later.
244
00:08:19,877 --> 00:08:22,077
See you later!
See you later.
245
00:08:22,110 --> 00:08:23,410
That's
the last babka.
246
00:08:23,443 --> 00:08:25,410
They got the last
babka.
I know!
247
00:08:25,443 --> 00:08:27,243
They're going in first
with the last babka.
248
00:08:27,277 --> 00:08:28,243
That was our babka.
249
00:08:28,277 --> 00:08:29,243
You can't beat a babka!
250
00:08:29,277 --> 00:08:31,410
We had that babka!
251
00:08:31,443 --> 00:08:32,843
They're gonna be
heroes!
252
00:08:32,877 --> 00:08:33,877
What are we gonna do now?
253
00:08:33,910 --> 00:08:34,076
If we can't get
the babka,
254
00:08:34,076 --> 00:08:34,977
If we can't get
the babka,
255
00:08:35,010 --> 00:08:36,243
the whole thing's
useless.
256
00:08:36,277 --> 00:08:38,410
Well, how about
a carrot cake?
257
00:08:38,443 --> 00:08:40,677
Carrot cake?
Why is that a cake?
258
00:08:40,710 --> 00:08:43,510
You don't make carrots
into a cake. I'm sorry!
259
00:08:43,543 --> 00:08:45,210
Black forest?
260
00:08:45,243 --> 00:08:46,843
Black forest?
Too scary.
261
00:08:46,877 --> 00:08:50,577
You're in the forest.
Ooh.
262
00:08:50,610 --> 00:08:52,043
Hey, how about
a napoleon?
263
00:08:52,077 --> 00:08:53,043
Napoleon?
264
00:08:53,077 --> 00:08:54,477
Who's he
to have a cake?
265
00:08:54,510 --> 00:08:56,543
He was a ruthless
warmonger!
266
00:08:56,577 --> 00:08:58,043
Might as well
get a Mengele.
267
00:09:00,410 --> 00:09:03,043
That was our babka!
We had that babka!
268
00:09:03,077 --> 00:09:04,043
What's this one?
269
00:09:04,077 --> 00:09:06,043
That? Cinnamon babka.
270
00:09:06,077 --> 00:09:09,877
[GASPS]
Another babka?
271
00:09:09,910 --> 00:09:13,643
There's chocolate,
and there's cinnamon.
272
00:09:13,677 --> 00:09:15,210
Well, we gotta get
the cinnamon.
273
00:09:15,243 --> 00:09:16,810
But they got
the chocolate.
274
00:09:16,843 --> 00:09:19,543
We'll be going in
with lesser babka.
275
00:09:19,577 --> 00:09:20,977
I beg your pardon?
276
00:09:21,010 --> 00:09:24,543
Cinnamon takes a back seat
to no babka!
277
00:09:24,577 --> 00:09:25,543
People love cinnamon!
278
00:09:25,577 --> 00:09:27,143
It should be on tables
in restaurants
279
00:09:27,177 --> 00:09:28,310
along with salt and pepper!
280
00:09:28,343 --> 00:09:29,310
Anytime someone says,
281
00:09:29,343 --> 00:09:31,243
"This is so good!
What's in this?",
282
00:09:31,277 --> 00:09:33,410
the answer invariably
comes back: cinnamon,
283
00:09:33,443 --> 00:09:34,076
cinnamon, again and again.
284
00:09:34,076 --> 00:09:35,210
cinnamon, again and again.
285
00:09:35,243 --> 00:09:36,543
Lesser babka?
286
00:09:36,577 --> 00:09:37,877
I think not.
287
00:09:38,877 --> 00:09:40,910
Forty-nine!
288
00:09:43,210 --> 00:09:44,677
I'll have
a cinnamon babka.
289
00:09:44,710 --> 00:09:47,243
And a black-and-white
cookie for me.
290
00:09:47,277 --> 00:09:50,010
Peace.
291
00:09:50,043 --> 00:09:53,477
That'll be 13.05.
292
00:09:53,510 --> 00:09:55,677
All right.
Here you go.
293
00:09:55,710 --> 00:09:58,510
A hundred?
I can't change that.
294
00:09:58,543 --> 00:09:59,510
You can't?
295
00:09:59,543 --> 00:10:01,177
Ha-ha.
All right, let's go.
296
00:10:01,210 --> 00:10:02,843
Wait a second.
297
00:10:02,877 --> 00:10:04,076
I can get change.
298
00:10:04,076 --> 00:10:04,210
I can get change.
299
00:10:07,943 --> 00:10:10,743
Hey! Anybody got change
for a hundred?
300
00:10:10,777 --> 00:10:12,977
Are you crazy?
You'll get us killed!
301
00:10:13,010 --> 00:10:14,143
What?
302
00:10:14,177 --> 00:10:16,143
Don't go shouting
we got a $100 bill!
303
00:10:16,177 --> 00:10:17,810
People will be
jumping out of windows!
304
00:10:17,843 --> 00:10:19,643
Go buy something,
and we'll get change.
305
00:10:19,677 --> 00:10:22,043
I am not buying something
just to get change.
306
00:10:22,077 --> 00:10:24,510
George, there's a newsstand
right over there. Come on.
307
00:10:30,910 --> 00:10:31,877
What are we doing?
308
00:10:31,910 --> 00:10:33,443
Just get some gum
or something.
309
00:10:37,210 --> 00:10:39,243
Pack of gum.
Here you go.
310
00:10:39,277 --> 00:10:42,343
What is it, a hundred?
I can't change a hundred.
311
00:10:42,377 --> 00:10:43,543
Why not?
312
00:10:43,577 --> 00:10:45,410
You got to buy
more that that.
313
00:10:46,377 --> 00:10:47,977
Here.
Get a newspaper.
314
00:10:48,010 --> 00:10:49,243
Newspaper.
315
00:10:49,277 --> 00:10:50,910
Not enough.
316
00:10:51,843 --> 00:10:53,010
Clark bar.
317
00:10:56,277 --> 00:10:57,243
Clark bar.
318
00:10:57,277 --> 00:10:59,043
Keep going.
319
00:10:59,077 --> 00:11:01,543
We're up to
2 dollars here!
320
00:11:01,577 --> 00:11:02,910
George,
get a Penthouse Forum.
321
00:11:02,943 --> 00:11:04,076
I'm not getting
a Penthouse Forum!
322
00:11:04,076 --> 00:11:06,010
I'm not getting
a Penthouse Forum!
323
00:11:06,043 --> 00:11:08,177
That'll make great
dinner-party conversation.
324
00:11:08,210 --> 00:11:10,577
We'll read the letters
at the dinner table.
325
00:11:10,610 --> 00:11:11,910
Oh, that's nice.
326
00:11:11,943 --> 00:11:13,343
Ever read
one of these?
327
00:11:13,377 --> 00:11:15,243
It's not real.
They're all made up!
328
00:11:15,277 --> 00:11:17,177
Oh, it's real.
329
00:11:17,210 --> 00:11:19,077
Hey, you know,
then there's an unusual
330
00:11:19,110 --> 00:11:20,510
number of people
in this country
331
00:11:20,543 --> 00:11:22,943
having sex
with amputees!
332
00:11:29,710 --> 00:11:31,577
Penthouse Forum,
333
00:11:31,610 --> 00:11:34,076
newspaper, gum,
Clark bar.
334
00:11:34,076 --> 00:11:34,443
newspaper, gum,
Clark bar.
335
00:11:38,443 --> 00:11:40,077
Six seventy-five.
336
00:11:40,110 --> 00:11:41,677
Oh, great. All right,
with the wine,
337
00:11:41,710 --> 00:11:43,543
I'm in
over $20 now!
338
00:11:43,577 --> 00:11:45,243
[MAN YELLS
IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
339
00:11:46,410 --> 00:11:47,877
Big coat! Big coat!
340
00:11:47,910 --> 00:11:49,077
Yes.
341
00:11:49,110 --> 00:11:50,577
I'm sorry.
It's a new coat.
342
00:11:52,877 --> 00:11:55,977
It's Gore-Tex.
343
00:11:56,010 --> 00:11:59,043
You better be careful
with that thing.
344
00:11:59,077 --> 00:12:00,210
You'll start a war.
345
00:12:01,243 --> 00:12:02,377
Mm.
346
00:12:02,410 --> 00:12:04,076
See, the key to eating
a black-and-white cookie
347
00:12:04,076 --> 00:12:05,410
See, the key to eating
a black-and-white cookie
348
00:12:05,443 --> 00:12:06,643
is you wanna get
some black
349
00:12:06,677 --> 00:12:08,377
and some white
in each bite.
350
00:12:08,410 --> 00:12:11,310
Nothing mixes better
than vanilla and chocolate.
351
00:12:11,343 --> 00:12:16,210
And yet, still somehow
racial harmony eludes us.
352
00:12:16,243 --> 00:12:18,710
If people would only
look to the cookie,
353
00:12:18,743 --> 00:12:20,210
all our problems
would be solved.
354
00:12:20,243 --> 00:12:24,343
Your views on race relations
are just fascinating.
355
00:12:24,377 --> 00:12:26,710
You really should do
an op-ed piece for The Times.
356
00:12:26,743 --> 00:12:27,843
Mm.
357
00:12:27,877 --> 00:12:30,177
Look to the cookie,
Elaine.
358
00:12:30,210 --> 00:12:31,543
Look to the cookie.
359
00:12:33,443 --> 00:12:34,076
Oh, what is this?
360
00:12:34,076 --> 00:12:35,977
Oh, what is this?
361
00:12:36,010 --> 00:12:37,510
What?
362
00:12:37,543 --> 00:12:38,843
It's a hair.
363
00:12:38,877 --> 00:12:40,510
Oh!
364
00:12:40,543 --> 00:12:42,343
Oh, take it back.
Let's get another one.
365
00:12:42,377 --> 00:12:44,177
We're late as it is.
I'll take it off.
366
00:12:44,210 --> 00:12:45,910
No, get another one.
It'll take a second.
367
00:12:45,943 --> 00:12:46,943
All right.
All right.
368
00:12:47,910 --> 00:12:48,877
Excuse me--
369
00:12:48,910 --> 00:12:50,343
Hey, hey.
I'm on line here.
370
00:12:50,377 --> 00:12:52,143
No, we just
bought this.
371
00:12:52,177 --> 00:12:55,577
Um, you sold us a cake
with a hair on it.
372
00:12:55,610 --> 00:12:57,177
You have to
take a number.
373
00:12:57,210 --> 00:13:00,677
We waited 15 minutes
for this!
374
00:13:00,710 --> 00:13:04,076
You sell me a cake
with a hair on it,
375
00:13:04,076 --> 00:13:04,177
You sell me a cake
with a hair on it,
376
00:13:04,210 --> 00:13:06,210
and then you
want me to wait?
377
00:13:06,243 --> 00:13:08,343
What are you doing?
You're gonna wait now?
378
00:13:08,377 --> 00:13:10,543
I'm not gonna eat a cake
with a hair on it.
379
00:13:10,577 --> 00:13:12,310
It was a little hair.
I took it off.
380
00:13:12,343 --> 00:13:13,343
A little hair?
381
00:13:13,377 --> 00:13:14,810
Do you think
that makes it better?
382
00:13:14,843 --> 00:13:16,843
What if it's your hair?
What if it's your hair?
383
00:13:16,877 --> 00:13:19,143
What is wrong with my hair?
384
00:13:19,177 --> 00:13:20,210
Nobody takes better care
385
00:13:20,243 --> 00:13:21,243
of their hair than me.
386
00:13:21,277 --> 00:13:23,310
You could serve dinner
on my head.
387
00:13:23,343 --> 00:13:26,010
You use that
misty herbal rainwater crap
388
00:13:26,043 --> 00:13:27,543
they sell in
the health food store.
389
00:13:27,577 --> 00:13:30,677
I use Prell,
the hard stuff.
390
00:13:30,710 --> 00:13:33,510
Hundred proof.
Takes your roots out!
391
00:13:33,543 --> 00:13:34,076
Okay, fine.
392
00:13:34,076 --> 00:13:34,643
Okay, fine.
393
00:13:34,677 --> 00:13:37,077
We'll just wait till
she calls the number.
394
00:13:37,110 --> 00:13:39,477
Maybe we should just
forget about the cake.
395
00:13:39,510 --> 00:13:41,743
No!
I'm bringing cake!
396
00:13:41,777 --> 00:13:43,743
[♪]
397
00:13:43,777 --> 00:13:46,010
All right,
we got the wine.
398
00:13:46,043 --> 00:13:47,877
Aren't we lucky?
We got wine.
399
00:13:47,910 --> 00:13:49,877
Whoopee-whoa!
400
00:13:49,910 --> 00:13:51,410
Imagine if we didn't
bring the wine.
401
00:13:51,443 --> 00:13:52,910
We'd be shunned
by society.
402
00:13:52,943 --> 00:13:53,977
Outcasts!
403
00:13:54,010 --> 00:13:56,243
"Where's your wine?
Get out!"
404
00:13:58,277 --> 00:13:59,510
"I know this is
gonna sound
405
00:13:59,543 --> 00:14:01,177
"like a crazy fantasy,
406
00:14:01,210 --> 00:14:04,076
"but every word
of this story is true.
407
00:14:04,076 --> 00:14:04,543
"but every word
of this story is true.
408
00:14:04,577 --> 00:14:05,643
"A few weeks ago,
409
00:14:05,677 --> 00:14:07,577
"my girlfriend happened
to mentioned to me
410
00:14:07,610 --> 00:14:10,077
how attractive she thought
our new neighbor Linda was."
411
00:14:10,110 --> 00:14:11,877
Look-- Look at this.
412
00:14:11,910 --> 00:14:15,377
Somebody double-parked
and blocked us in!
413
00:14:15,410 --> 00:14:19,410
Does anybody know
whose car that is?
414
00:14:19,443 --> 00:14:20,577
Maybe there's
a note on it.
415
00:14:20,610 --> 00:14:22,577
Oh, brother.
416
00:14:22,610 --> 00:14:24,043
No! No note!
417
00:14:24,077 --> 00:14:25,143
Can you believe this?
418
00:14:25,177 --> 00:14:26,677
"Of course,
I noticed her, too,
419
00:14:26,710 --> 00:14:29,577
"with those ample breasts
and pouty lips.
420
00:14:29,610 --> 00:14:32,443
I don't have to tell you,
she was a knockout."
421
00:14:36,405 --> 00:14:37,539
I really cannot comprehend
422
00:14:37,572 --> 00:14:39,239
how stupid people
can be sometimes!
423
00:14:39,272 --> 00:14:40,839
Can you comprehend it?
424
00:14:40,872 --> 00:14:42,505
No, I can't
comprehend it.
425
00:14:42,539 --> 00:14:43,839
We can put
a man on the moon,
426
00:14:43,872 --> 00:14:45,739
but we're still
basically very stupid.
427
00:14:45,772 --> 00:14:47,139
This car's driver
could be a guy
428
00:14:47,172 --> 00:14:49,172
that built the rocket.
429
00:14:49,205 --> 00:14:50,505
See what I'm saying?
430
00:14:50,539 --> 00:14:52,639
He could build the rocket,
but he's still stupid
431
00:14:52,672 --> 00:14:54,672
for double-parking
and blocking somebody in.
432
00:14:54,705 --> 00:14:56,705
You really understand my point
433
00:14:56,739 --> 00:14:58,672
about building rockets
and double-parking.
434
00:14:58,705 --> 00:15:00,239
On one hand
he's smart with rockets,
435
00:15:00,272 --> 00:15:02,239
and on the other hand
he's dumb with parking.
436
00:15:02,272 --> 00:15:03,705
It's cold out here,
huh?
437
00:15:03,739 --> 00:15:04,082
Maybe it's
not even stupidity.
438
00:15:04,082 --> 00:15:05,072
Maybe it's
not even stupidity.
439
00:15:05,105 --> 00:15:06,872
Maybe it's just
a blatant disregard
440
00:15:06,905 --> 00:15:08,739
for basic human decency.
441
00:15:08,772 --> 00:15:10,539
This is how
dictators start.
442
00:15:10,572 --> 00:15:12,239
Think Mussolini
would circle the block
443
00:15:12,272 --> 00:15:13,539
six times
looking for a spot?
444
00:15:13,572 --> 00:15:15,172
How about Idi Amin, huh?
445
00:15:15,205 --> 00:15:16,472
If I was running
for office,
446
00:15:16,505 --> 00:15:18,739
I'd ask for the death penalty
for double-parkers!
447
00:15:18,772 --> 00:15:21,372
If this is allowed to go on,
this is not a society.
448
00:15:21,405 --> 00:15:22,805
This is anarchy!
449
00:15:22,839 --> 00:15:24,139
Are those shoes
comfortable?
450
00:15:24,172 --> 00:15:25,872
No, not really.
They look comfortable.
451
00:15:25,905 --> 00:15:27,305
I know, that's why
I bought them,
452
00:15:27,339 --> 00:15:29,205
but they're not comfortable.
453
00:15:29,239 --> 00:15:31,639
[♪]
454
00:15:31,672 --> 00:15:34,082
Why couldn't we
take the hair off and go?
455
00:15:34,082 --> 00:15:34,205
Why couldn't we
take the hair off and go?
456
00:15:34,239 --> 00:15:35,572
No, that's out
of the question.
457
00:15:35,605 --> 00:15:36,572
Why?
458
00:15:36,605 --> 00:15:38,139
Because I had
a bad experience
459
00:15:38,172 --> 00:15:41,139
with a hair
when I was younger.
460
00:15:41,172 --> 00:15:42,805
What happened?
461
00:15:42,839 --> 00:15:44,805
I'd rather not
talk about it.
462
00:15:44,839 --> 00:15:46,472
You can't tell me?
463
00:15:46,505 --> 00:15:48,739
All right.
464
00:15:50,505 --> 00:15:51,839
I once found a hair
in my farina,
465
00:15:51,872 --> 00:15:54,139
and I freaked out.
466
00:15:54,172 --> 00:15:56,472
You found a hair
in your farina?
467
00:15:56,505 --> 00:15:58,872
Yeah.
What happened?
468
00:15:58,905 --> 00:16:02,339
I started screaming,
"There's a hair in my farina!
There's a hair in my farina!"
469
00:16:02,372 --> 00:16:03,472
And I ran
out of the house,
470
00:16:03,505 --> 00:16:04,082
and I was running
and running.
471
00:16:04,082 --> 00:16:04,739
and I was running
and running.
472
00:16:04,772 --> 00:16:06,505
I was little, but I could
run really fast.
473
00:16:06,539 --> 00:16:09,139
I just kept running.
474
00:16:09,172 --> 00:16:10,639
They found me
three hours later,
475
00:16:10,672 --> 00:16:12,139
collapsed at
a construction site.
476
00:16:12,172 --> 00:16:14,305
[COUGHING IN BACKGROUND]
477
00:16:14,339 --> 00:16:15,405
Wow.
478
00:16:15,439 --> 00:16:16,405
Whose hair was it?
479
00:16:16,439 --> 00:16:17,405
My mother's.
480
00:16:17,439 --> 00:16:18,405
Oh...
481
00:16:18,439 --> 00:16:19,405
Fifty-eight.
482
00:16:19,439 --> 00:16:20,905
Ooh, that's us.
Oh, good.
483
00:16:25,105 --> 00:16:29,205
You sold us a hair
with a cake around it.
484
00:16:29,239 --> 00:16:30,205
We'd like another one.
485
00:16:30,239 --> 00:16:32,805
[COUGHING]
486
00:16:32,839 --> 00:16:33,972
JERRY:
Oh, that's lovely.
487
00:16:34,005 --> 00:16:34,082
That's what you want
to see, yeah.
488
00:16:34,082 --> 00:16:37,039
That's what you want
to see, yeah.
489
00:16:37,072 --> 00:16:38,905
[COUGHING CONTINUES]
490
00:16:38,939 --> 00:16:41,239
Yeah, you wanna trade
your hair for some phlegm.
491
00:16:41,272 --> 00:16:42,505
[COUGHING CONTINUES]
492
00:16:42,539 --> 00:16:44,205
That's a good deal.
You win the pennant
493
00:16:44,239 --> 00:16:45,672
with that trade:
hair for phlegm.
494
00:16:45,705 --> 00:16:47,072
Here you are.
495
00:16:47,105 --> 00:16:50,172
Okay. All right,
we got the cake now.
496
00:16:50,205 --> 00:16:52,539
Where is George
and Kramer?
497
00:16:52,572 --> 00:16:55,039
[CAR HORN HONKING]
498
00:16:55,072 --> 00:16:57,072
KRAMER:
Hey, double-parker!
499
00:16:57,105 --> 00:16:59,405
Show yourself!
500
00:16:59,439 --> 00:17:01,072
Come on out!
I'm freezing!
501
00:17:01,105 --> 00:17:03,239
[HONKING HORN]
502
00:17:03,272 --> 00:17:04,082
We are really
late now.
503
00:17:04,082 --> 00:17:04,639
We are really
late now.
504
00:17:04,672 --> 00:17:06,505
We're in big trouble.
Big trouble.
505
00:17:06,539 --> 00:17:08,205
Why?
You know...
506
00:17:08,239 --> 00:17:09,372
Elaine.
507
00:17:09,405 --> 00:17:11,872
What about her?
508
00:17:11,905 --> 00:17:14,472
I'm a little
scared of her.
509
00:17:14,505 --> 00:17:15,905
You're scared
of Elaine?
510
00:17:15,939 --> 00:17:17,705
Yes!
Why?
511
00:17:17,739 --> 00:17:19,305
Did you ever see her
lose her temper?
512
00:17:19,339 --> 00:17:21,505
I was once late 'cause
I bought a Panama hat.
513
00:17:21,539 --> 00:17:23,672
She grabbed it by the brim,
pulled it down so hard,
514
00:17:23,705 --> 00:17:25,205
my head came right
through the top.
515
00:17:25,239 --> 00:17:26,705
Let's go inside
the liquor store.
516
00:17:26,739 --> 00:17:27,839
I'm freezing in here.
517
00:17:27,872 --> 00:17:29,539
Why don't you
just wear a heavier coat.
518
00:17:29,572 --> 00:17:32,705
I wanted to look good
for the party.
519
00:17:32,739 --> 00:17:34,082
GEORGE:
Oh, hey, hey, hey!
520
00:17:34,082 --> 00:17:34,739
GEORGE:
Oh, hey, hey, hey!
521
00:17:34,772 --> 00:17:36,639
That's great!
That's very nice!
522
00:17:36,672 --> 00:17:38,539
We been waiting 20 minutes
for you people!
523
00:17:38,572 --> 00:17:39,872
You think
you're Mussolini?
524
00:17:39,905 --> 00:17:43,405
Back off, puffball,
it's not my car!
525
00:17:46,039 --> 00:17:48,239
Wasn't talking to you.
526
00:17:48,272 --> 00:17:49,272
KRAMER:
I'm going in.
527
00:17:51,572 --> 00:17:55,205
Wait till I get my hands
on that George.
528
00:17:55,239 --> 00:17:57,905
I am going to pull
that big hood
529
00:17:57,939 --> 00:18:00,572
over his little head,
530
00:18:00,605 --> 00:18:02,505
tie the strings
531
00:18:02,539 --> 00:18:04,082
and suffocate him.
532
00:18:04,082 --> 00:18:05,239
and suffocate him.
533
00:18:05,272 --> 00:18:07,339
You remember
that Panama hat?
534
00:18:07,372 --> 00:18:08,339
Ha!
535
00:18:08,372 --> 00:18:10,839
That was nothing.
536
00:18:10,872 --> 00:18:12,205
Huh? What?
537
00:18:12,239 --> 00:18:13,905
What's the matter
with you?
538
00:18:13,939 --> 00:18:16,139
I don't know.
I don't feel so good.
539
00:18:16,172 --> 00:18:17,472
What's wrong?
540
00:18:17,505 --> 00:18:20,072
My stomach.
541
00:18:20,105 --> 00:18:22,872
I think it was
that cookie.
542
00:18:22,905 --> 00:18:24,239
The black-and-white?
543
00:18:24,272 --> 00:18:25,739
Yeah.
544
00:18:25,772 --> 00:18:28,172
Not getting along?
545
00:18:29,405 --> 00:18:33,805
I think I got David Duke
and Farrakhan down there.
546
00:18:33,839 --> 00:18:34,082
Well, if we can't
look to the cookie,
547
00:18:34,082 --> 00:18:35,572
Well, if we can't
look to the cookie,
548
00:18:35,605 --> 00:18:36,639
where can we look?
549
00:18:36,672 --> 00:18:38,905
I feel like
I'm gonna throw up.
550
00:18:38,939 --> 00:18:41,339
Wait. What about
your vomit streak?
551
00:18:41,372 --> 00:18:42,872
I know.
552
00:18:42,905 --> 00:18:45,505
I haven't thrown up
since June 29, 1980.
553
00:18:47,172 --> 00:18:48,905
Ow! Oh!
554
00:18:48,939 --> 00:18:51,405
[GASPING]
555
00:18:51,439 --> 00:18:52,805
Sorry.
556
00:18:52,839 --> 00:18:53,805
Sorry?
557
00:18:53,839 --> 00:18:55,972
You almost
took my toe off!
558
00:18:56,005 --> 00:18:57,639
Why don't you watch
what you're doing,
559
00:18:57,672 --> 00:18:58,772
you lunatic!
560
00:19:01,172 --> 00:19:04,082
Oh, Jerry, I think
he broke my toe.
561
00:19:04,082 --> 00:19:04,505
Oh, Jerry, I think
he broke my toe.
562
00:19:04,539 --> 00:19:06,505
Wh-- Where
you going?
563
00:19:06,539 --> 00:19:09,839
Fourteen years
down the drain.
564
00:19:09,872 --> 00:19:12,405
You think chickens
have individual personalities?
565
00:19:12,439 --> 00:19:14,139
[SHIVERING ]
I don't know.
566
00:19:14,172 --> 00:19:16,305
If you had five chickens,
could you tell them apart
567
00:19:16,339 --> 00:19:17,472
just by the way
they acted,
568
00:19:17,505 --> 00:19:19,239
or would they all
just be walking around?
569
00:19:19,272 --> 00:19:20,905
[CLUCKS LIKE CHICKEN]
570
00:19:20,939 --> 00:19:22,672
If they have
individual personalities,
571
00:19:22,705 --> 00:19:24,572
I'm not sure we should be
eating them.
572
00:19:24,605 --> 00:19:25,972
What's the matter
with you?
573
00:19:26,005 --> 00:19:27,305
[CHATTERS INCOHERENTLY]
574
00:19:27,339 --> 00:19:29,639
Can I help you guys
with anything?
575
00:19:29,672 --> 00:19:30,805
No, no.
576
00:19:30,839 --> 00:19:32,572
We bought the wine
here before.
577
00:19:32,605 --> 00:19:34,082
We're just waiting for some
double-parker to unblock us.
578
00:19:34,082 --> 00:19:36,072
We're just waiting for some
double-parker to unblock us.
579
00:19:36,105 --> 00:19:39,072
Well, wait outside.
This isn't a hangout.
580
00:19:39,105 --> 00:19:41,739
But my friend here
has hypothermia!
581
00:19:41,772 --> 00:19:42,905
Hypothermia.
582
00:19:42,939 --> 00:19:44,905
All right, guys...
583
00:19:44,939 --> 00:19:46,705
take it outside.
584
00:19:48,739 --> 00:19:53,039
[BOTTLES CRASH]
585
00:19:54,572 --> 00:19:56,105
You're paying for these.
586
00:20:03,372 --> 00:20:04,082
How was it?
587
00:20:04,082 --> 00:20:04,572
How was it?
588
00:20:04,605 --> 00:20:06,572
Good as it gets.
589
00:20:06,605 --> 00:20:08,905
You know, that coat
was Gore-Tex.
590
00:20:08,939 --> 00:20:10,172
It's worth a hell
of a lot more
591
00:20:10,205 --> 00:20:11,972
than that cheap
chardonnay.
592
00:20:12,005 --> 00:20:15,372
You know, I'm freezing?
I'm definitely freezing.
593
00:20:15,405 --> 00:20:17,039
I can't stop shaking.
594
00:20:17,072 --> 00:20:19,505
I'm cold too.
At least you got a coat.
595
00:20:19,539 --> 00:20:22,572
Let's get
in the car.
596
00:20:25,572 --> 00:20:26,739
Oh, my god.
597
00:20:26,772 --> 00:20:29,372
That's Saddam Hussein,
the dictator!
598
00:20:29,405 --> 00:20:31,039
I told you!
I told you!
599
00:20:31,072 --> 00:20:33,905
HUSSEIN:
I wouldn't walk around
without a coat in this weather.
600
00:20:33,939 --> 00:20:34,082
You'll catch your death
of cold. So long.
601
00:20:34,082 --> 00:20:36,405
You'll catch your death
of cold. So long.
602
00:20:36,439 --> 00:20:37,539
[♪]
603
00:20:37,572 --> 00:20:39,905
Can I get you
anything else?
604
00:20:39,939 --> 00:20:41,372
Oh, no, thanks.
605
00:20:41,405 --> 00:20:43,872
How about a nice box
of scram?
606
00:20:49,039 --> 00:20:51,505
Somebody double-parked!
We couldn't help it!
607
00:20:51,539 --> 00:20:53,705
It might've been Saddam Hussein.
We're not sure.
608
00:20:53,739 --> 00:20:57,239
He had a British accent,
though.
609
00:20:57,272 --> 00:20:58,872
What-- What
happened to you?
610
00:20:58,905 --> 00:21:03,239
Somebody put a cane
on my foot...
611
00:21:03,272 --> 00:21:04,082
just like the one
I'm gonna put up your--
612
00:21:04,082 --> 00:21:05,839
just like the one
I'm gonna put up your--
613
00:21:05,872 --> 00:21:07,872
Hey, what happened
to your coat?
614
00:21:07,905 --> 00:21:11,005
And what's that smell?
What, are you drunk?
615
00:21:11,039 --> 00:21:13,005
I had to give it
to the liquor store guy.
616
00:21:13,039 --> 00:21:14,639
What for?
617
00:21:14,672 --> 00:21:17,039
I spilled
some chardonnay.
618
00:21:17,072 --> 00:21:19,739
So, what
did you get?
619
00:21:19,772 --> 00:21:21,839
Cinnamon babka.
620
00:21:21,872 --> 00:21:22,839
Cinnamon?
621
00:21:22,872 --> 00:21:24,172
Why didn't you
get chocolate?
622
00:21:24,205 --> 00:21:25,739
George...
What?
623
00:21:25,772 --> 00:21:30,405
[SHIVERING]
624
00:21:30,439 --> 00:21:32,805
[♪]
625
00:21:32,839 --> 00:21:34,082
[KNOCKING]
626
00:21:34,082 --> 00:21:35,072
[KNOCKING]
627
00:21:36,572 --> 00:21:37,572
Here.
628
00:21:37,605 --> 00:21:39,305
Here's your cake.
629
00:21:39,339 --> 00:21:40,539
And your wine.
630
00:21:40,572 --> 00:21:41,639
See ya.
631
00:21:41,672 --> 00:21:42,672
See ya.
632
00:21:42,705 --> 00:21:45,272
[♪]
633
00:21:53,572 --> 00:21:55,572
I heard a weatherman say
634
00:21:55,605 --> 00:21:58,639
that 75 percent
of your body heat
635
00:21:58,672 --> 00:22:01,072
is actually lost
through the top of the head,
636
00:22:01,105 --> 00:22:03,005
which sounds like you
could go skiing naked
637
00:22:03,039 --> 00:22:04,205
if you got a good hat.
638
00:22:07,505 --> 00:22:09,372
But there's no hat
that makes a statement
639
00:22:09,405 --> 00:22:11,239
quite like the hat
with the flaps.
640
00:22:11,272 --> 00:22:14,972
The hat with the flaps
makes a statement
641
00:22:15,005 --> 00:22:18,039
that no other hat makes.
642
00:22:18,072 --> 00:22:20,572
This hat says to the world,
643
00:22:20,605 --> 00:22:22,705
"I would rather have
the heat in my skull
644
00:22:22,739 --> 00:22:23,103
than anything society
could possibly offer me."
645
00:22:23,103 --> 00:22:26,972
than anything society
could possibly offer me."
646
00:22:27,005 --> 00:22:28,205
In fact, I would say
647
00:22:28,239 --> 00:22:29,805
if you're on trial
for a serious crime
648
00:22:29,839 --> 00:22:32,072
and your lawyer recommends
the insanity defense,
649
00:22:32,105 --> 00:22:34,372
this is the hat to wear.
650
00:22:34,405 --> 00:22:37,072
Your lawyer should insist.
He should just go:
651
00:22:37,105 --> 00:22:40,539
"Your Honor,
the defense rests."
44570
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