Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:01,900 --> 00:00:03,500
When I was a kid,
my favorite ride
2
00:00:03,533 --> 00:00:05,366
was the bumper-car ride.
Remember that ride?
3
00:00:05,400 --> 00:00:06,700
Going around in a circle.
4
00:00:06,733 --> 00:00:08,533
There was always one kid
on the bumper cars
5
00:00:08,566 --> 00:00:10,533
that could not do it.
Do you remember this kid?
6
00:00:10,566 --> 00:00:12,533
As soon as the ride
gets started,
7
00:00:12,566 --> 00:00:15,633
he'd be, like, stuck
in a pack of empty cars.
8
00:00:15,666 --> 00:00:16,900
Just:
9
00:00:18,933 --> 00:00:21,200
"Excuse me.
10
00:00:21,233 --> 00:00:23,800
"Excuse me. It won't go!
11
00:00:23,833 --> 00:00:25,400
"Come on!
12
00:00:25,433 --> 00:00:27,666
It's almost over!"
13
00:00:27,700 --> 00:00:29,000
[AUDIENCE LAUGHS]
14
00:00:29,033 --> 00:00:30,000
You know, he always ends up
with the attendant
15
00:00:30,000 --> 00:00:31,033
You know, he always ends up
with the attendant
16
00:00:31,066 --> 00:00:33,766
hanging off that big pole,
helping him steer it. You know.
17
00:00:37,366 --> 00:00:38,366
"Stop crying."
18
00:00:38,400 --> 00:00:39,466
Dsh.
19
00:00:39,500 --> 00:00:41,000
Then there's always
that other--
20
00:00:41,033 --> 00:00:42,666
One other really bad car,
21
00:00:42,700 --> 00:00:44,333
the helpless
father-and-son team.
22
00:00:44,366 --> 00:00:46,400
This is another car
just not going anywhere.
23
00:00:46,433 --> 00:00:48,800
They're never organized.
Who's on the wheel?
24
00:00:48,833 --> 00:00:50,733
Who's pressing on the gas?
They're just:
25
00:00:50,766 --> 00:00:52,500
"Ho, son, turn the wheel."
26
00:00:58,233 --> 00:00:59,733
KRAMER:
All right, Coney Island?
27
00:00:59,766 --> 00:01:01,533
Okay, you can take
the B or the F
28
00:01:01,566 --> 00:01:04,166
and switch for the N
at Broadway and Lafayette.
29
00:01:04,200 --> 00:01:06,300
Or you can go over
the bridge to DeKalb
30
00:01:06,333 --> 00:01:08,200
and catch the Q
to Atlantic Avenue
31
00:01:08,233 --> 00:01:09,900
then switch to the IRT,
32
00:01:09,933 --> 00:01:11,366
2, 3, 4, or 5.
33
00:01:11,400 --> 00:01:12,700
But don't get on the G.
34
00:01:12,733 --> 00:01:13,833
See, that's very tempting,
35
00:01:13,866 --> 00:01:15,833
but you wind up on Smith
and 9th Street,
36
00:01:15,866 --> 00:01:18,200
then you gotta get
on the R.
37
00:01:18,233 --> 00:01:20,666
Couldn't he just take the D
straight to Coney Island?
38
00:01:21,333 --> 00:01:22,733
Well, yeah.
39
00:01:25,200 --> 00:01:26,466
Okay.
40
00:01:26,500 --> 00:01:28,233
What time's your
job interview, George?
41
00:01:28,266 --> 00:01:29,633
9:45.
42
00:01:29,666 --> 00:01:31,466
Remember, don't whistle
on the elevator.
43
00:01:31,500 --> 00:01:32,633
Why not?
44
00:01:32,666 --> 00:01:34,133
That's what Willy Loman
told Biff
45
00:01:34,166 --> 00:01:36,133
before his interview
in Death of a Salesman.
46
00:01:36,166 --> 00:01:37,900
What, you're comparing me
to Biff Loman?
47
00:01:37,933 --> 00:01:39,166
That's very encouraging.
48
00:01:39,200 --> 00:01:41,900
The biggest loser in the history
of American literature.
49
00:01:41,933 --> 00:01:43,133
All right.
I gotta get going.
50
00:01:43,166 --> 00:01:44,566
What time's
the lesbian wedding?
51
00:01:44,600 --> 00:01:45,633
9:30.
52
00:01:45,666 --> 00:01:46,900
Lesbian wedding.
53
00:01:46,933 --> 00:01:48,966
How do they work
the bride and groom on that?
54
00:01:49,000 --> 00:01:50,166
What, do they
flip a coin?
55
00:01:50,200 --> 00:01:52,733
Yeah, they flip a coin.
56
00:01:52,766 --> 00:01:53,887
What, was that not
politically correct?
57
00:01:53,887 --> 00:01:54,400
What, was that not
politically correct?
58
00:01:54,433 --> 00:01:55,900
It's a-- It's a
legitimate question.
59
00:01:55,933 --> 00:01:57,500
[YAWNING]
I'm so tired.
60
00:01:57,533 --> 00:01:59,500
I'm gonna fall asleep
on that train.
61
00:01:59,533 --> 00:02:00,500
I always
get the feeling
62
00:02:00,533 --> 00:02:01,733
when lesbians are
looking at me,
63
00:02:01,766 --> 00:02:02,900
they're thinking,
64
00:02:02,933 --> 00:02:04,433
"That's why I'm not
a heterosexual."
65
00:02:06,533 --> 00:02:07,833
All right,
Jerry, come on.
66
00:02:07,866 --> 00:02:09,833
Let's go. Pick up the check
so we can go.
67
00:02:09,866 --> 00:02:11,300
Oh, I'm paying for breakfast?
Yeah.
68
00:02:11,333 --> 00:02:12,300
Yeah.
Yeah.
69
00:02:12,333 --> 00:02:14,066
Why do I always pay?
70
00:02:14,100 --> 00:02:16,300
What am I,
made of money?
71
00:02:16,333 --> 00:02:17,933
You bunch of
deadbeats.
72
00:02:19,400 --> 00:02:21,400
GEORGE:
How many tickets
you paying today?
73
00:02:21,433 --> 00:02:22,400
Uh, let's see.
74
00:02:22,433 --> 00:02:23,887
Speeding,
running a red light,
75
00:02:23,887 --> 00:02:24,233
Speeding,
running a red light,
76
00:02:24,266 --> 00:02:26,066
no license,
no registration
77
00:02:26,933 --> 00:02:28,366
no plates,
no brake lights,
78
00:02:28,400 --> 00:02:30,333
no rear-view mirror.
79
00:02:30,366 --> 00:02:32,533
Look at that one.
80
00:02:32,566 --> 00:02:33,533
No doors?
81
00:02:33,566 --> 00:02:35,700
Yeah, I'm fighting
that one.
82
00:02:35,733 --> 00:02:38,000
You know, this is gonna cost me
over 600 bucks.
83
00:02:39,866 --> 00:02:43,866
Oh, I can't carry change
in these pants. It falls out.
84
00:02:43,900 --> 00:02:46,866
Here you go.
There you go.
85
00:02:46,900 --> 00:02:48,200
Thank you.
86
00:02:50,866 --> 00:02:53,866
That guy's not blind.
[ELAINE GROANS WITH DISGUST]
87
00:02:53,900 --> 00:02:55,033
So can I convince
anybody
88
00:02:55,066 --> 00:02:56,666
to come down to Coney
Island with me?
89
00:02:56,700 --> 00:02:59,166
Gotta pick up my car
at the pound. George?
90
00:02:59,200 --> 00:03:01,200
I can't believe it. They
actually found your stolen car?
91
00:03:01,233 --> 00:03:02,833
Not only did they find it,
92
00:03:02,866 --> 00:03:05,466
it was simonized,
and the front end was aligned.
93
00:03:05,500 --> 00:03:06,633
[LAUGHS]
94
00:03:06,666 --> 00:03:08,200
It's amazing.
JERRY: So, what do you say?
95
00:03:08,233 --> 00:03:10,700
Ride on the Cyclone.
Hot dog at Nathan's on me.
96
00:03:10,733 --> 00:03:12,066
Who are you, Satan?
97
00:03:12,100 --> 00:03:14,166
I'm close to a job here.
It's my second interview.
98
00:03:14,200 --> 00:03:15,666
All right, Biff.
99
00:03:17,566 --> 00:03:18,833
Elaine?
100
00:03:18,866 --> 00:03:20,166
Merry-go-round?
101
00:03:20,200 --> 00:03:22,666
I can't.
I'm the best man.
102
00:03:22,700 --> 00:03:23,887
Kramer. Bumper cars.
103
00:03:23,887 --> 00:03:25,000
Kramer. Bumper cars.
104
00:03:25,033 --> 00:03:26,966
I gotta go to court.
I'll get in trouble.
105
00:03:27,000 --> 00:03:28,233
What's the matter with you?
106
00:03:28,266 --> 00:03:30,466
It could be years till
I get back to Coney Island.
107
00:03:30,500 --> 00:03:32,200
I can't go on the
rides alone.
108
00:03:32,233 --> 00:03:35,133
CONDUCTOR:
42nd Street. Change for the Dand the Double R,
109
00:03:35,166 --> 00:03:37,666
the 2, 3, 4, 5, 7,C, K, and F trains.
110
00:03:51,266 --> 00:03:52,200
Well.
111
00:03:56,566 --> 00:03:57,500
See you.
112
00:04:47,700 --> 00:04:49,000
Hey!
113
00:04:53,433 --> 00:04:53,887
Rahh!
114
00:04:53,887 --> 00:04:55,233
Rahh!
115
00:04:55,266 --> 00:04:56,566
Yeah!
116
00:05:25,666 --> 00:05:27,866
[SNORES]
117
00:05:48,200 --> 00:05:50,033
You looking for a job?
118
00:05:50,066 --> 00:05:52,033
Me? Why?
119
00:05:52,066 --> 00:05:53,887
Er, well, you're reading
the classifieds.
120
00:05:53,887 --> 00:05:54,466
Er, well, you're reading
the classifieds.
121
00:05:54,500 --> 00:05:55,700
Oh, uh, no, no, no.
122
00:05:55,733 --> 00:05:56,833
I, uh...
[CHUCKLES]
123
00:05:56,866 --> 00:05:58,866
I was just looking
for the stock page there.
124
00:05:58,900 --> 00:06:00,466
Ah, here it is.
125
00:06:00,500 --> 00:06:02,066
Looking for the quotes.
126
00:06:02,100 --> 00:06:03,700
Gotta check the quotes.
127
00:06:03,733 --> 00:06:06,200
Love a good quote.
128
00:06:06,233 --> 00:06:08,366
Oh, IBM up a quarter.
129
00:06:08,400 --> 00:06:10,466
What do you know?
130
00:06:10,500 --> 00:06:13,166
You didn't look like someone
who needed a job.
131
00:06:13,200 --> 00:06:14,233
Me?
132
00:06:14,266 --> 00:06:17,233
No, no.
I don't, I don't.
133
00:06:17,266 --> 00:06:18,666
Doing very well.
134
00:06:18,700 --> 00:06:21,400
Very well, yeah.
135
00:06:21,433 --> 00:06:22,833
So you're in the market?
136
00:06:22,866 --> 00:06:23,887
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, I'm, uh...
137
00:06:23,887 --> 00:06:24,900
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, I'm, uh...
138
00:06:24,933 --> 00:06:26,333
in the market.
139
00:06:26,366 --> 00:06:27,533
Which market?
140
00:06:28,500 --> 00:06:30,300
Which market?
The, uh...
141
00:06:30,333 --> 00:06:31,400
The big one.
142
00:06:31,433 --> 00:06:33,833
The, uh, big market
with the big board.
143
00:06:33,866 --> 00:06:34,866
Bull market, bear market.
144
00:06:34,900 --> 00:06:35,900
You name the market,
145
00:06:35,933 --> 00:06:37,000
[CLICKS]
I'm there.
146
00:06:37,033 --> 00:06:38,700
[LAUGHS]
147
00:06:38,733 --> 00:06:41,166
So do you work for one of
the big brokerage houses?
148
00:06:41,200 --> 00:06:42,666
They wish.
149
00:06:42,700 --> 00:06:44,300
I hate the big brokerage houses.
150
00:06:44,333 --> 00:06:45,966
Hate them with a passion.
151
00:06:46,000 --> 00:06:48,000
Big brokerage houses
killed my father.
152
00:06:48,033 --> 00:06:49,000
Really?
153
00:06:49,033 --> 00:06:50,666
Well, they hurt him bad.
154
00:06:50,700 --> 00:06:52,900
Really hurt his feelings.
155
00:06:52,933 --> 00:06:53,887
It's a long story.
156
00:06:53,887 --> 00:06:54,000
It's a long story.
157
00:06:54,033 --> 00:06:56,566
I-I don't like to
talk about it, but...
158
00:06:56,600 --> 00:06:57,833
I swore there and then
159
00:06:57,866 --> 00:06:59,833
that I would never work
for a big brokerage house.
160
00:06:59,866 --> 00:07:03,300
You see, all they care
about is money.
161
00:07:03,333 --> 00:07:06,000
I'm about more than money.
I'm about...
162
00:07:06,033 --> 00:07:07,500
people.
163
00:07:07,533 --> 00:07:10,200
So I've always gone
my own way and...
164
00:07:10,233 --> 00:07:11,200
I've never looked back.
165
00:07:11,233 --> 00:07:12,500
[HORN BLOWS]
166
00:07:14,000 --> 00:07:14,966
[LAUGHS]
167
00:07:15,000 --> 00:07:16,000
[LAUGHS]
168
00:07:34,233 --> 00:07:36,700
I started riding these trains
in the '40s.
169
00:07:36,733 --> 00:07:38,233
Ah.
170
00:07:38,266 --> 00:07:40,933
Those days, a man would
give up his seat for a woman.
171
00:07:42,200 --> 00:07:44,366
Now we're liberated.
We have to stand.
172
00:07:44,400 --> 00:07:45,400
[CHUCKLES]
173
00:07:45,433 --> 00:07:46,666
It's ironic.
174
00:07:46,700 --> 00:07:48,233
What's ironic?
175
00:07:48,266 --> 00:07:50,000
This. That we've come
all this way,
176
00:07:50,033 --> 00:07:51,966
we made all this progress,
but...
177
00:07:52,000 --> 00:07:53,887
you know, we lost
the little things, the niceties.
178
00:07:53,887 --> 00:07:55,133
you know, we lost
the little things, the niceties.
179
00:07:55,166 --> 00:07:57,566
No. I-I mean, what does
"ironic" mean?
180
00:07:58,700 --> 00:07:59,666
Oh.
181
00:08:00,933 --> 00:08:03,200
Where you off to with such
a nice present, huh?
182
00:08:03,233 --> 00:08:05,366
Birthday party?
A wedding.
183
00:08:05,400 --> 00:08:06,666
A wedding?
Yeah.
184
00:08:06,700 --> 00:08:10,533
Ha! I didn't think people
still get married.
185
00:08:10,566 --> 00:08:13,833
Oh, it's hard today
with the men and women.
186
00:08:13,866 --> 00:08:15,466
Ha, you're telling me.
187
00:08:15,500 --> 00:08:17,500
So, uh, they're
a nice couple?
188
00:08:17,533 --> 00:08:19,333
Oh, very nice.
Hmm.
189
00:08:19,366 --> 00:08:21,866
What does he do,
if you don't mind my asking?
190
00:08:21,900 --> 00:08:23,666
She.
She?
191
00:08:23,700 --> 00:08:23,887
Oh. She, she works,
he doesn't.
192
00:08:23,887 --> 00:08:26,166
Oh. She, she works,
he doesn't.
193
00:08:26,200 --> 00:08:28,666
He sounds like my son.
194
00:08:28,700 --> 00:08:30,366
There is no "he."
195
00:08:30,400 --> 00:08:31,800
There's no "he"?
196
00:08:31,833 --> 00:08:34,566
So, uh,
who's getting married?
197
00:08:34,600 --> 00:08:35,566
Um...
198
00:08:35,600 --> 00:08:37,033
Two women.
199
00:08:37,066 --> 00:08:39,033
It's a...
200
00:08:39,066 --> 00:08:40,333
A lesbian wedding.
201
00:08:43,366 --> 00:08:44,466
Lesbian wedding?
202
00:08:44,500 --> 00:08:46,333
Uh-huh. Yep.
203
00:08:46,366 --> 00:08:48,400
Yep, I'm the, um...
204
00:08:48,433 --> 00:08:49,400
[COUGHS]
205
00:08:49,433 --> 00:08:50,533
the best man.
206
00:08:51,066 --> 00:08:52,800
Oh.
207
00:08:52,833 --> 00:08:53,887
Great.
208
00:08:53,887 --> 00:08:54,366
Great.
209
00:08:56,033 --> 00:09:00,300
My luck. I don't talk to a soul
on the subway for 35 years...
210
00:09:00,333 --> 00:09:03,000
I get the best man
at a lesbian wedding.
211
00:09:03,033 --> 00:09:04,133
Oh, no, no, no.
212
00:09:04,166 --> 00:09:05,133
You don't understand.
213
00:09:05,166 --> 00:09:06,833
I'm not a lesbian!
214
00:09:06,866 --> 00:09:10,166
I hate men,
but I'm not a lesbian.
215
00:09:56,833 --> 00:09:58,466
ELAINE:
I'm really looking forwardto this.
216
00:09:58,500 --> 00:10:01,633
I love weddings.Maybe I'll meet somebody.
217
00:10:01,666 --> 00:10:02,633
Mmmmm...
218
00:10:02,666 --> 00:10:03,900
Maybe not.
219
00:10:03,933 --> 00:10:05,700
[BRAKES SCREECHING]
220
00:10:06,766 --> 00:10:10,133
Oh, man. We're stopping?
221
00:10:10,166 --> 00:10:11,566
[LAUGHING]
222
00:10:11,600 --> 00:10:14,066
Well, uh, this is where
I get off.
223
00:10:14,100 --> 00:10:16,033
Oh, uh., you do.
Uh...
224
00:10:16,066 --> 00:10:17,733
Yeah.
Ummm...
225
00:10:17,766 --> 00:10:19,866
Hey, why don't you,
uh...?
226
00:10:19,900 --> 00:10:21,066
Oh, nothing.
227
00:10:21,100 --> 00:10:22,533
No, no. What, what?
228
00:10:22,566 --> 00:10:23,887
Well, I was going to say,
"Why don't you get off with me?"
229
00:10:23,887 --> 00:10:25,166
Well, I was going to say,
"Why don't you get off with me?"
230
00:10:25,200 --> 00:10:26,733
But you're obviously
very busy,
231
00:10:26,766 --> 00:10:29,800
on your way to some
important meeting or something.
232
00:10:29,833 --> 00:10:31,566
Yeah. Well...
233
00:10:31,600 --> 00:10:34,166
See, I-I knew
it was a bad idea.
234
00:10:39,433 --> 00:10:41,666
Hey, what's another million,
give or take?
235
00:10:41,700 --> 00:10:43,933
I get off when and where
I wanna get off.
236
00:10:46,433 --> 00:10:48,966
I'm stuck. Could you just
pull a little--?
237
00:10:49,000 --> 00:10:51,033
I'll just be a second.
238
00:10:51,066 --> 00:10:52,666
Don't--
Don't start the train!
239
00:10:52,700 --> 00:10:53,887
Don't start the train!
240
00:10:53,887 --> 00:10:54,033
Don't start the train!
241
00:10:54,066 --> 00:10:55,233
Here it is.
242
00:10:55,266 --> 00:10:57,233
Here it is, the four horse
in the first race.
243
00:10:57,266 --> 00:10:58,300
Pappernick.
244
00:10:58,333 --> 00:10:59,700
How do you know
he's gonna win?
245
00:10:59,733 --> 00:11:01,233
My UPS guy, Lance.
246
00:11:01,266 --> 00:11:03,833
The guys who own the horse
are his regular customers.
247
00:11:03,866 --> 00:11:05,700
Every horse he's ever given me
has won.
248
00:11:05,733 --> 00:11:06,733
Yeah?
Yeah.
249
00:11:06,766 --> 00:11:07,733
See, they've been
sandbagging,
250
00:11:07,766 --> 00:11:09,000
looking for
a good spot.
251
00:11:09,033 --> 00:11:10,400
He's been getting
in light
252
00:11:10,433 --> 00:11:12,033
because they're using
a bug boy on him.
253
00:11:12,066 --> 00:11:13,700
And the workouts
have been unpublished.
254
00:11:13,733 --> 00:11:15,133
Now they're ready to run
with him..
255
00:11:15,166 --> 00:11:16,533
They're gonna break
his maiden.
256
00:11:16,566 --> 00:11:19,000
He's gonna go for a great price.
Maybe 30-to-1.
257
00:11:19,033 --> 00:11:20,633
I'm telling you,
it's a lock.
258
00:11:20,666 --> 00:11:21,700
But it rained
last night.
259
00:11:21,733 --> 00:11:23,887
Exactly. This horse
loves the slop.
260
00:11:23,887 --> 00:11:24,366
Exactly. This horse
loves the slop.
261
00:11:24,400 --> 00:11:25,966
Ahhh.
It's in his bloodlines.
262
00:11:26,000 --> 00:11:27,000
His father
was a mudder.
263
00:11:27,033 --> 00:11:28,366
His mother
was a mudder.
264
00:11:28,400 --> 00:11:29,366
His mother
was a mudder?
265
00:11:29,400 --> 00:11:30,700
What did I just say?
Come on.
266
00:11:30,733 --> 00:11:32,500
Let's go to the office.
I'll call my bookie.
267
00:11:32,533 --> 00:11:34,066
Hey, don't tell
anybody.
268
00:11:38,533 --> 00:11:39,933
Oh, man.
269
00:11:40,833 --> 00:11:41,733
Okay.
270
00:11:59,200 --> 00:12:01,000
Okay.
271
00:12:12,166 --> 00:12:15,100
You realize, of course,
you're naked.
272
00:12:15,833 --> 00:12:17,466
Naked, dressed,
273
00:12:17,500 --> 00:12:19,300
I don't see
any difference.
274
00:12:19,333 --> 00:12:21,133
You ought to sit here.
275
00:12:21,166 --> 00:12:22,966
There's a difference.
276
00:12:23,000 --> 00:12:26,133
You got something against
the naked body?
277
00:12:26,166 --> 00:12:28,566
I got something against yours.
278
00:12:28,600 --> 00:12:30,166
How about a couple
of deep knee bends,
279
00:12:30,200 --> 00:12:31,633
maybe some squat thrusts?
280
00:12:31,666 --> 00:12:33,833
Who's got time
for squat thrusts?
281
00:12:33,866 --> 00:12:35,141
All right, how about
skipping breakfast?
282
00:12:35,141 --> 00:12:36,500
All right, how about
skipping breakfast?
283
00:12:36,533 --> 00:12:37,633
I'm guessing you're not
284
00:12:37,666 --> 00:12:39,533
a half-grapefruit
and black coffee man.
285
00:12:39,566 --> 00:12:41,000
I like a good breakfast.
286
00:12:41,033 --> 00:12:43,966
I understand, I like
a good breakfast
287
00:12:44,000 --> 00:12:45,966
long as you don't wind up
trapped in a room,
288
00:12:46,000 --> 00:12:49,966
in overalls and pigtails,
being counseled by Dick Gregory.
289
00:12:50,000 --> 00:12:52,200
I'm not ashamed
of my body.
290
00:12:52,233 --> 00:12:53,633
Exactly.
291
00:12:53,666 --> 00:12:55,233
That's your problem.
292
00:12:55,266 --> 00:12:56,233
You should be.
293
00:12:57,600 --> 00:12:58,566
Don't get up.
294
00:12:58,600 --> 00:13:01,000
Please, allow me.
295
00:13:05,433 --> 00:13:06,833
ELAINE:
Oh, this is great.
296
00:13:06,866 --> 00:13:09,700
This is what I need,just what I need.
297
00:13:09,733 --> 00:13:12,000
Okay, take it easy.I'm sure it's nothing,
298
00:13:12,033 --> 00:13:13,966
Probably rats on the track.
299
00:13:14,000 --> 00:13:16,233
They're stopping for rats.
300
00:13:16,266 --> 00:13:18,566
Oh, God, it's so crowded.
301
00:13:18,600 --> 00:13:21,366
How could there beso many people?
302
00:13:21,400 --> 00:13:23,533
This guy really smells.
303
00:13:23,566 --> 00:13:25,633
Doesn't anyone use deodorantin the city?
304
00:13:25,666 --> 00:13:28,400
What is so hard? You takethe cap off, you roll it on.
305
00:13:28,433 --> 00:13:31,166
What's that? I feel somethingrubbing against me.
306
00:13:32,100 --> 00:13:33,566
These disgusting animals,
307
00:13:33,600 --> 00:13:35,066
these people should bein a cage.
308
00:13:35,100 --> 00:13:35,141
We are in a cage.
309
00:13:35,141 --> 00:13:37,133
We are in a cage.
310
00:13:37,166 --> 00:13:38,533
What if I miss the wedding?
311
00:13:38,566 --> 00:13:40,066
I got the ring.What'll they do?
312
00:13:40,100 --> 00:13:41,866
You can't get marriedwithout a ring.
313
00:13:41,900 --> 00:13:43,033
[HUFFING]
Oh, G...
314
00:13:43,066 --> 00:13:45,033
I can't breathe.
315
00:13:45,066 --> 00:13:46,566
I feel faint.
316
00:13:46,600 --> 00:13:49,700
Okay, take it easy.It'll start moving soon.
317
00:13:49,733 --> 00:13:51,366
Think about people inconcentration camps,
318
00:13:51,400 --> 00:13:53,000
what they went through.
319
00:13:53,033 --> 00:13:55,866
And the hostages! What wouldyou do if you were a hostage?
320
00:13:55,900 --> 00:13:58,700
Think about that.This is nothing.
321
00:13:58,733 --> 00:14:01,533
No, it's not nothing,it's something.
322
00:14:01,566 --> 00:14:03,200
It's a nightmare.
323
00:14:03,233 --> 00:14:04,366
Help me!
324
00:14:04,400 --> 00:14:05,141
Move it!Come on!
325
00:14:05,141 --> 00:14:05,866
Move it!Come on!
326
00:14:05,900 --> 00:14:07,466
Move this (bleep) thing!
327
00:14:07,500 --> 00:14:09,033
Why isn't it moving?!
328
00:14:09,066 --> 00:14:11,900
What could go wrongwith a train? It's on tracks.
329
00:14:11,933 --> 00:14:15,166
There's no traffic.How could a train get stuck?
330
00:14:15,200 --> 00:14:17,833
Step on the gas!What could it be?
331
00:14:17,866 --> 00:14:20,166
You'd think the conductorwould explain it to us.
332
00:14:20,200 --> 00:14:21,633
"I'm sorry, there's a delay.
333
00:14:21,666 --> 00:14:23,400
We'll be movingin five minutes."
334
00:14:23,433 --> 00:14:24,666
I wanna hear a voice.
335
00:14:24,700 --> 00:14:27,066
What's that on my leg?!
336
00:14:37,733 --> 00:14:38,700
Nice.
337
00:14:40,066 --> 00:14:43,400
Your, uh, company sends you
on the road often, huh?
338
00:14:43,433 --> 00:14:44,633
Nice.
339
00:14:44,666 --> 00:14:47,500
Oh, hey,
nice ice bucket there.
340
00:14:47,533 --> 00:14:49,000
Make yourself comfortable.
341
00:14:51,000 --> 00:14:53,200
GEORGE:
Make myself comfortable?What does that mean?
342
00:14:53,233 --> 00:14:55,000
Does she want meto take my clothes off?
343
00:14:55,033 --> 00:14:56,366
Is she taking her clothes off?
344
00:14:56,400 --> 00:14:58,800
What if I take mine offand she still has hers on?
345
00:14:58,833 --> 00:15:00,166
Then I really look likean idiot.
346
00:15:00,200 --> 00:15:01,533
She could get offendedand leave.
347
00:15:01,566 --> 00:15:03,533
S-so maybe I shouldleave them on.
348
00:15:03,566 --> 00:15:05,141
But then what ifshe takes hers off?
349
00:15:05,141 --> 00:15:05,233
But then what ifshe takes hers off?
350
00:15:05,266 --> 00:15:06,566
Then she'll feel humiliated.
351
00:15:06,600 --> 00:15:07,966
Make yourself comfortable?
352
00:15:08,000 --> 00:15:09,200
I've gotthis unbelievable woman.
353
00:15:09,233 --> 00:15:11,000
And this "comfortable" thingcould ruin me.
354
00:15:11,033 --> 00:15:12,633
I got it.I'll take my shoes off
355
00:15:12,666 --> 00:15:14,400
and sit on the bed.
356
00:15:14,433 --> 00:15:15,733
There. That's comfortable.
357
00:15:15,766 --> 00:15:18,466
She can't accuse meof being uncomfortable.
358
00:15:18,500 --> 00:15:19,400
[DOOR OPENS]
359
00:15:24,566 --> 00:15:26,600
Gotta tell you,
I'm pretty comfortable.
360
00:15:28,033 --> 00:15:29,400
KRAMER:
Oh yeah, it's all set.
361
00:15:29,433 --> 00:15:30,800
They got the bug boy on him.
362
00:15:30,833 --> 00:15:32,200
The bug boy?
Yeah,
363
00:15:32,233 --> 00:15:34,466
the little fellow's
been riding his heart out.
364
00:15:34,500 --> 00:15:35,141
They're gonna
break his maiden.
365
00:15:35,141 --> 00:15:35,966
They're gonna
break his maiden.
366
00:15:36,000 --> 00:15:37,233
Really?
Yeah.
367
00:15:37,266 --> 00:15:39,233
It's a little slow out there.
It rained last night.
368
00:15:39,266 --> 00:15:40,566
Oh, this baby
loves the slop.
369
00:15:40,600 --> 00:15:41,833
Loves it.
Eats it up.
370
00:15:41,866 --> 00:15:43,833
Eats the slop.
Born to slop.
371
00:15:43,866 --> 00:15:45,233
His father was a mudder.
372
00:15:45,266 --> 00:15:46,566
His father was a mudder?
373
00:15:46,600 --> 00:15:47,833
His mother was a mudder.
374
00:15:47,866 --> 00:15:49,966
His mother was a mudder?
375
00:15:50,000 --> 00:15:51,100
What did I just say?
376
00:15:51,833 --> 00:15:52,800
Yi!
377
00:15:52,833 --> 00:15:54,300
Hey. All right,
378
00:15:54,333 --> 00:15:56,300
uh, 600, Pappernick
to win.
379
00:15:56,333 --> 00:15:57,266
Yes, sir.
380
00:15:58,933 --> 00:16:02,066
They still have no pitching.
Gooden's a question mark.
381
00:16:02,100 --> 00:16:04,566
You don't recover from
those rotator cuffs so fast.
382
00:16:04,600 --> 00:16:05,141
I'm not worried about
the Mets' pitching.
383
00:16:05,141 --> 00:16:06,133
I'm not worried about
the Mets' pitching.
384
00:16:06,166 --> 00:16:07,900
They got pitching.
They got no hitting.
385
00:16:07,933 --> 00:16:09,833
No, hitting,
they got hitting.
386
00:16:09,866 --> 00:16:12,333
Bonilla, Murray.
They got no defense.
387
00:16:12,366 --> 00:16:14,733
Defense, please.
They need speed.
388
00:16:14,766 --> 00:16:17,666
Speed? They've got Coleman.
They need a bullpen.
389
00:16:17,700 --> 00:16:20,333
Franco's no good?
They got no team leaders.
390
00:16:20,366 --> 00:16:21,333
They got Franco.
391
00:16:21,366 --> 00:16:23,200
What they need
is a front office.
392
00:16:23,233 --> 00:16:24,533
But you gotta like
their chances.
393
00:16:24,566 --> 00:16:25,866
I love
their chances.
394
00:16:25,900 --> 00:16:27,866
Tell you what, if they win
the pennant this year,
395
00:16:27,900 --> 00:16:29,800
I'll sit naked with you
at the World Series.
396
00:16:29,833 --> 00:16:31,100
It's a deal.
397
00:16:33,533 --> 00:16:35,141
ELAINE:
Oh, gee, why couldn't Itake a cab?
398
00:16:35,141 --> 00:16:35,966
ELAINE:
Oh, gee, why couldn't Itake a cab?
399
00:16:36,000 --> 00:16:39,700
For $6, my whole lifecould've changed.
400
00:16:39,733 --> 00:16:43,533
What is that on my leg?
401
00:16:43,566 --> 00:16:45,733
I'll never get out of here.
402
00:16:45,766 --> 00:16:48,900
What if I'm herefor the rest of my life?
403
00:16:48,933 --> 00:16:51,800
Maybe I'll get outin five seconds.
404
00:16:51,833 --> 00:16:52,966
One banana,
405
00:16:53,000 --> 00:16:54,066
two banana
406
00:16:54,100 --> 00:16:55,300
three banana,
407
00:16:55,333 --> 00:16:56,533
four banana
408
00:16:56,566 --> 00:16:58,500
five banana.
409
00:16:58,533 --> 00:16:59,900
No.
410
00:16:59,933 --> 00:17:02,066
I'm still here.
411
00:17:02,100 --> 00:17:03,400
Still here.
412
00:17:03,433 --> 00:17:05,141
When will they start moving?
413
00:17:05,141 --> 00:17:05,500
When will they start moving?
414
00:17:05,533 --> 00:17:07,000
Move!
415
00:17:07,033 --> 00:17:08,400
Move!
416
00:17:08,433 --> 00:17:09,700
Move!
417
00:17:09,733 --> 00:17:10,900
[ENGINE HUMS]
418
00:17:10,933 --> 00:17:12,833
It's moving.
419
00:17:12,866 --> 00:17:15,066
It's moving!
420
00:17:15,100 --> 00:17:17,000
Yes!
421
00:17:17,033 --> 00:17:18,133
Yes.
422
00:17:18,166 --> 00:17:19,066
[BRAKES SCREECH]
423
00:17:20,433 --> 00:17:22,033
Mother !
424
00:17:27,166 --> 00:17:28,566
Um...
[CHUCKLES]
425
00:17:28,600 --> 00:17:31,833
Gee, I-I hope you have the key
for these things.
426
00:17:31,866 --> 00:17:34,700
Oh, don't worry. I do.
427
00:17:34,733 --> 00:17:35,141
You know, m-my mother used
to walk around our apartment
428
00:17:35,141 --> 00:17:36,866
You know, m-my mother used
to walk around our apartment
429
00:17:36,900 --> 00:17:38,900
in her bra and panties.
430
00:17:38,933 --> 00:17:40,700
S-she didn't look
anything like you.
431
00:17:40,733 --> 00:17:42,466
She was...
432
00:17:42,500 --> 00:17:46,366
really disgusting,
really bad body.
433
00:17:46,400 --> 00:17:47,900
You know,
if you can imagine
434
00:17:47,933 --> 00:17:50,966
an uglier, fatter version
of Shirley Booth.
435
00:17:51,000 --> 00:17:53,500
Remember Shirley Booth
in Hazel?
436
00:17:53,533 --> 00:17:54,966
Really embarrassing
because, you know,
437
00:17:55,000 --> 00:17:56,800
I had the only mother
in the whole neighborhood
438
00:17:56,833 --> 00:17:58,300
who was worse looking
than Hazel.
439
00:17:58,333 --> 00:17:59,966
You can imagine the taunts
I would hear.
440
00:18:00,000 --> 00:18:01,633
Like what?
441
00:18:01,666 --> 00:18:03,466
Like, uh...
442
00:18:03,500 --> 00:18:05,141
"Hey, your mother's
uglier than Hazel."
443
00:18:05,141 --> 00:18:06,200
"Hey, your mother's
uglier than Hazel."
444
00:18:06,233 --> 00:18:09,233
"Hazel really puts your mother
to shame," you know.
445
00:18:17,566 --> 00:18:19,066
What's, uh, going on?
446
00:18:19,100 --> 00:18:20,866
It was a pleasure doing business
with you, George,
447
00:18:20,900 --> 00:18:22,666
but I'm afraid I'm gonna
have to get going.
448
00:18:22,700 --> 00:18:23,866
[LAUGHS]
Get going?
449
00:18:23,900 --> 00:18:25,966
But, uh, we haven't really,
you know, uh...
450
00:18:26,000 --> 00:18:28,533
Eight dollars?
Eight dollars?
451
00:18:28,566 --> 00:18:29,966
What are you doing,
you're robbing me?
452
00:18:30,000 --> 00:18:32,333
I wasted my whole morning
on you for $8?
453
00:18:34,628 --> 00:18:35,141
Wait a-- Wait a second,
what're you doing?
454
00:18:35,141 --> 00:18:36,495
Wait a-- Wait a second,
what're you doing?
455
00:18:36,528 --> 00:18:37,495
I'm taking
your clothes.
456
00:18:37,528 --> 00:18:38,995
No, no, no.
That's my only suit!
457
00:18:39,028 --> 00:18:42,095
It cost me $350!
I got it at Moe Ginsburg!
458
00:18:42,128 --> 00:18:43,162
Bye, George.
Wait, wait.
459
00:18:43,195 --> 00:18:45,528
You can't just
leave me here.
460
00:18:45,562 --> 00:18:46,895
Will I see you again?!
461
00:18:51,062 --> 00:18:52,462
ANNOUNCER:
As they make the home stretch,
462
00:18:52,495 --> 00:18:54,362
Ben Bajanut's Passionate Love's
the leader.
463
00:18:54,395 --> 00:18:56,695
Victor's Hoy's Boyfollowed by Jamet
464
00:18:56,728 --> 00:18:58,195
Little Baggit, Kiss Harmony,
465
00:18:58,228 --> 00:19:00,528
and then a long wayto Flagrant. Independent of
466
00:19:00,562 --> 00:19:01,595
Come on!
what is happening.
467
00:19:01,628 --> 00:19:03,995
Into the stretchwith 1/8 mile to go,
468
00:19:04,028 --> 00:19:05,141
Stepagain and Pat Chanelare battling it out.
469
00:19:05,141 --> 00:19:06,195
Stepagain and Pat Chanelare battling it out.
470
00:19:06,228 --> 00:19:07,595
They clear from Jamet,
471
00:19:07,628 --> 00:19:09,162
Pappernick's startingto make some ground,
472
00:19:09,195 --> 00:19:11,595
but Stepagain is the leader.With a 16th to go,
473
00:19:11,628 --> 00:19:12,795
Come on.
Stepagain clear.
474
00:19:12,828 --> 00:19:14,628
Come on!
Look at Pappernick,
475
00:19:14,662 --> 00:19:16,495
Come on. Yes!
he's sprouting from his weight.
476
00:19:16,528 --> 00:19:18,762
Yes! Yes! Yes!
Stepagain jumps the leader.
477
00:19:18,795 --> 00:19:21,128
Yes.
Pappernick flashing home
478
00:19:21,162 --> 00:19:22,828
Stepagain and Pappernick,
479
00:19:22,862 --> 00:19:23,928
Pappernick and Stepagain
Yes!
480
00:19:23,962 --> 00:19:25,328
hit the line in a photo finish.
481
00:19:25,362 --> 00:19:26,328
Yes! Yes!
482
00:19:26,362 --> 00:19:27,695
Yes!
By a nose,
483
00:19:27,728 --> 00:19:28,828
the winner is Pappernick.
Yes!
484
00:19:28,862 --> 00:19:30,162
Yes!
485
00:19:30,195 --> 00:19:31,162
Yes!
486
00:19:31,195 --> 00:19:32,128
I won. Hey!
487
00:19:38,528 --> 00:19:40,495
[WHISTLES]
Yeah.
488
00:19:41,028 --> 00:19:41,995
Ah?
489
00:19:58,395 --> 00:19:59,395
Hey.
490
00:20:17,562 --> 00:20:19,962
I haven't had a hot dog
at Nathan's in 20 years.
491
00:20:19,995 --> 00:20:21,495
First, we ride
the Cyclone.
492
00:20:23,395 --> 00:20:24,695
Chilly out.
493
00:20:26,162 --> 00:20:27,795
[DEEP INHALE]
494
00:20:27,828 --> 00:20:28,795
Ah,
495
00:20:28,828 --> 00:20:30,362
French fries.
496
00:20:32,128 --> 00:20:33,028
[VIOLIN PLAYS]
497
00:20:34,328 --> 00:20:35,141
[GRUNTS]
498
00:20:35,141 --> 00:20:35,295
[GRUNTS]
499
00:20:36,828 --> 00:20:38,362
Get up.
Hey, hey!
500
00:20:38,895 --> 00:20:39,862
Ah!
501
00:20:39,895 --> 00:20:41,195
Give me the money.
Ah.
502
00:20:41,228 --> 00:20:42,495
Give me the money!
503
00:20:42,528 --> 00:20:44,295
Freeze! Police!
504
00:20:50,295 --> 00:20:51,628
JERRY:
No, I never got the car.
505
00:20:51,662 --> 00:20:53,095
We were having
such a good time,
506
00:20:53,128 --> 00:20:55,095
by the time I got to
the police garage,
507
00:20:55,128 --> 00:20:56,995
it was closed.
508
00:20:57,028 --> 00:20:58,428
That's too bad.
509
00:20:58,462 --> 00:20:59,528
You wouldn't believe
510
00:20:59,562 --> 00:21:01,928
what this guy put away
at Nathan's.
511
00:21:01,962 --> 00:21:04,195
Look at what we won.
You want him?
512
00:21:04,228 --> 00:21:05,141
Get that out of my face.
513
00:21:05,141 --> 00:21:05,762
Get that out of my face.
514
00:21:05,795 --> 00:21:08,262
So you missed the wedding.
515
00:21:08,295 --> 00:21:10,295
You'll catch the bris!
516
00:21:17,162 --> 00:21:20,428
Hare Krishna,
Hare Krishna.
517
00:21:20,462 --> 00:21:22,195
How'd you like
a Hare Krishna fist
518
00:21:22,228 --> 00:21:23,662
down your throat,
you little punk?
519
00:21:25,362 --> 00:21:26,995
George.
520
00:21:27,028 --> 00:21:28,862
Biff.
521
00:21:28,895 --> 00:21:31,428
What, did you whistle
on the elevator?
522
00:21:31,462 --> 00:21:33,995
I have my spare key
in your apartment, right?
523
00:21:34,028 --> 00:21:35,141
Yeah, it's in
the kitchen drawer.
524
00:21:35,141 --> 00:21:35,195
Yeah, it's in
the kitchen drawer.
525
00:21:35,228 --> 00:21:36,828
Give me your key.
I gotta get it.
526
00:21:36,862 --> 00:21:38,128
All right, what happened?
Never mind
527
00:21:38,162 --> 00:21:39,828
what happened, just...
528
00:21:39,862 --> 00:21:40,828
give me the key.
529
00:21:40,862 --> 00:21:42,328
Come on,
I'll go with you.
530
00:21:42,362 --> 00:21:44,062
Here. Pay.
531
00:21:45,562 --> 00:21:47,395
Wait, wait, wait.
Give me that.
532
00:21:53,895 --> 00:21:55,628
All right.
533
00:21:57,228 --> 00:22:00,495
So I take the subway
down to Coney Island
534
00:22:00,528 --> 00:22:02,995
to go on the Cyclone.
I'm riding on the subway.
535
00:22:03,028 --> 00:22:05,141
I'm sitting on the D train
for an hour and 15 minutes
536
00:22:05,141 --> 00:22:06,328
I'm sitting on the D train
for an hour and 15 minutes
537
00:22:06,362 --> 00:22:09,162
to go on a scary ride.
538
00:22:09,195 --> 00:22:11,495
Okay, how dumb is that?
539
00:22:11,528 --> 00:22:13,462
You know that first sharp drop
on the Cyclone?
540
00:22:13,495 --> 00:22:15,062
Fell asleep.
37804
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof