Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,667 --> 00:00:03,587
Previously on Young Sheldon...
LINKLETTER:
Hello, Mrs. Cooper.
2
00:00:03,587 --> 00:00:06,548
I just wanted to let you know,
with Dr. Sturgis away,
3
00:00:06,548 --> 00:00:09,009
I'll be available
should Sheldon need anything.
4
00:00:09,009 --> 00:00:10,636
Now, I'm not
terribly experienced
5
00:00:10,636 --> 00:00:11,887
around children.
6
00:00:11,887 --> 00:00:13,388
If he needs to use the restroom,
7
00:00:13,388 --> 00:00:16,058
I don't have to go in with him,
do I?
8
00:00:16,058 --> 00:00:17,601
I don't need you to babysit me.
9
00:00:17,601 --> 00:00:19,311
I'm perfectly self-reliant.
10
00:00:19,311 --> 00:00:20,812
Then it's good
I kept the receipt
11
00:00:20,812 --> 00:00:23,857
for this bottle of bubbles
shaped like a bear.
12
00:00:23,857 --> 00:00:26,151
Welcome to the world
of philosophy.
13
00:00:26,151 --> 00:00:27,694
I'm going
to teach you
14
00:00:27,694 --> 00:00:30,197
that you don't even know
what you think you know.
15
00:00:30,197 --> 00:00:32,157
Oh, boy.
16
00:00:32,157 --> 00:00:34,576
I'm not going to school.
Why not?
17
00:00:34,576 --> 00:00:36,203
Because I don't know
what's real.
18
00:00:37,162 --> 00:00:38,830
Nothing matters.
19
00:00:38,830 --> 00:00:40,666
George?!
20
00:00:45,337 --> 00:00:46,338
All right,
21
00:00:46,338 --> 00:00:47,422
what's the problem here?
22
00:00:47,422 --> 00:00:49,299
I don't know what's real.
23
00:00:49,299 --> 00:00:50,801
That's a fun thing to think
about on the way to school.
24
00:00:50,801 --> 00:00:52,010
Get up and get dressed.
25
00:00:52,010 --> 00:00:53,762
Maybe I'm already dressed.
26
00:00:53,762 --> 00:00:56,348
Maybe I'm wearing
a zoot suit and spats.
27
00:00:56,348 --> 00:00:59,601
That's a shoe covering that's
short for "spatterdasher."
28
00:00:59,601 --> 00:01:00,727
Or is it?
29
00:01:00,727 --> 00:01:02,521
There's no way to know.
30
00:01:02,521 --> 00:01:04,273
Here's what I know: I don't have
time for this nonsense.
31
00:01:04,273 --> 00:01:05,607
What is time?
32
00:01:05,607 --> 00:01:06,608
What is sense?
33
00:01:06,608 --> 00:01:08,235
What is "is"?
34
00:01:08,235 --> 00:01:09,695
Sheldon, I mean it.
35
00:01:09,695 --> 00:01:12,197
I remember
when things meant things.
36
00:01:12,197 --> 00:01:14,199
All right, I'm gonna count
to three. One...
37
00:01:14,199 --> 00:01:17,035
Believing in numbers--
that takes me back.
38
00:01:17,035 --> 00:01:18,829
Two...
To be or not to be.
39
00:01:18,829 --> 00:01:20,622
Shakespeare was onto something.
40
00:01:20,622 --> 00:01:22,082
It's your last chance.
41
00:01:22,082 --> 00:01:24,251
Have you ever wondered
if you're the tongue
42
00:01:24,251 --> 00:01:26,461
of a multidimensional being
trying to taste something
43
00:01:26,461 --> 00:01:28,255
you can never even understand?
44
00:01:29,256 --> 00:01:30,924
I have.
45
00:01:35,137 --> 00:01:36,596
I talked to him.
46
00:01:37,556 --> 00:01:39,057
Where is your mother?
47
00:01:39,057 --> 00:01:40,225
She had to leave for work.
48
00:01:40,225 --> 00:01:41,893
I have to work, too.
49
00:01:41,893 --> 00:01:43,729
You also get to take me
to school.
50
00:01:43,729 --> 00:01:45,731
What am I supposed to do
about your brother?
51
00:01:45,731 --> 00:01:46,940
Call me old-fashioned,
52
00:01:46,940 --> 00:01:48,275
but I say spank him.
53
00:01:48,275 --> 00:01:50,110
Your mom won't let me.
54
00:01:51,111 --> 00:01:54,072
♪ Nobody else
is stronger than I am ♪
55
00:01:54,072 --> 00:01:57,242
♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain ♪
56
00:01:57,242 --> 00:01:59,661
♪ I bet I could be your hero ♪
57
00:01:59,661 --> 00:02:02,247
♪ I am a mighty little man ♪
58
00:02:02,247 --> 00:02:06,293
♪ I am a mighty little man. ♪
59
00:02:09,463 --> 00:02:11,381
Okay, I'm here.
60
00:02:11,381 --> 00:02:13,383
What's up?
61
00:02:13,383 --> 00:02:15,093
Sheldon won't get out of bed,
and I'm gonna be late for work.
62
00:02:15,093 --> 00:02:16,720
He's gonna be late for school.
63
00:02:16,720 --> 00:02:18,764
So you want me
to get him up and drive him?
64
00:02:18,764 --> 00:02:19,598
Yeah.
65
00:02:19,598 --> 00:02:21,016
I like it better
66
00:02:21,016 --> 00:02:23,477
when I just come eat your food
and leave.
67
00:02:24,770 --> 00:02:25,937
Hey, Moon Pie.
68
00:02:25,937 --> 00:02:27,773
What's going on here?
69
00:02:27,773 --> 00:02:29,107
That's an excellent question.
70
00:02:29,107 --> 00:02:30,609
Too bad there's no answer.
71
00:02:30,609 --> 00:02:32,277
Well, you need
to get out of bed.
72
00:02:32,277 --> 00:02:34,196
I don't need to do anything.
73
00:02:34,196 --> 00:02:35,781
Okay, I'm gonna count to three.
74
00:02:35,781 --> 00:02:37,491
Dad already counted to three.
75
00:02:37,491 --> 00:02:39,701
Oh.
76
00:02:39,701 --> 00:02:41,286
Did he try the Texas thing?
77
00:02:41,286 --> 00:02:42,162
No.
78
00:02:42,162 --> 00:02:44,206
In that case,
79
00:02:44,206 --> 00:02:45,207
look at you,
80
00:02:45,207 --> 00:02:46,792
lyin' there.
81
00:02:46,792 --> 00:02:48,210
When a Texan gets
knocked off a horse,
82
00:02:48,210 --> 00:02:49,795
he gets right back on.
83
00:02:49,795 --> 00:02:51,546
That is the second most
important thing
84
00:02:51,546 --> 00:02:53,423
about bein' a Texan,
85
00:02:53,423 --> 00:02:57,052
right after thinkin' you're
better than everybody else.
86
00:02:58,053 --> 00:02:59,805
Maybe the horse
gets back on the Texan.
87
00:02:59,805 --> 00:03:01,014
Who's to say?
88
00:03:02,474 --> 00:03:04,309
I don't know what that means.
89
00:03:04,309 --> 00:03:06,478
That's because
you can't know anything.
90
00:03:07,979 --> 00:03:09,815
If you need
to stare at the ceiling
91
00:03:09,815 --> 00:03:11,691
and contemplate
the futility of existence,
92
00:03:11,691 --> 00:03:13,402
Missy's bed is available.
93
00:03:16,696 --> 00:03:17,739
Amazing.
94
00:03:17,739 --> 00:03:19,366
What is?
95
00:03:19,366 --> 00:03:21,827
I've been using this same pen
for seven months,
96
00:03:21,827 --> 00:03:23,203
and it's still going.
97
00:03:23,203 --> 00:03:25,080
That's your bar for amazing?
98
00:03:25,080 --> 00:03:26,998
Yeah.
99
00:03:26,998 --> 00:03:28,500
Sad.
100
00:03:28,500 --> 00:03:30,377
It's the same pen.
101
00:03:30,377 --> 00:03:32,379
(phone rings)
It is too early in the morning
for you.
102
00:03:33,588 --> 00:03:35,173
Hello.
103
00:03:35,173 --> 00:03:37,551
Yeah. I'll be down in a bit.
104
00:03:39,511 --> 00:03:40,929
Where ya headed?
105
00:03:40,929 --> 00:03:42,389
Principal's office.
106
00:03:42,389 --> 00:03:44,766
Ooh, you're in trouble...
107
00:03:44,766 --> 00:03:46,351
You're a child.
108
00:03:46,351 --> 00:03:48,603
(laughs) I'd rather be a
child than in trouble.
109
00:03:49,688 --> 00:03:51,690
Shelly,
110
00:03:51,690 --> 00:03:53,358
Dr. Sturgis is
on the line for you.
111
00:03:53,358 --> 00:03:55,527
Maybe he is, maybe he isn't,
112
00:03:55,527 --> 00:03:56,611
but very well.
113
00:03:56,611 --> 00:03:58,697
Hello?
Hi, Sheldon.
114
00:03:58,697 --> 00:04:02,409
I hear you're going through
some sort of existential crisis.
115
00:04:02,409 --> 00:04:04,119
I suppose so.
116
00:04:04,119 --> 00:04:06,371
I just don't know if we can tell
what's real or not.
117
00:04:06,371 --> 00:04:08,206
And if nothing's real,
I don't know
118
00:04:08,206 --> 00:04:10,750
what to think
or if I'm even thinking at all.
119
00:04:10,750 --> 00:04:13,378
I went through
something similar once.
120
00:04:13,378 --> 00:04:15,297
Really? What happened?
121
00:04:15,297 --> 00:04:18,216
I was trekking
through the Amazon,
122
00:04:18,216 --> 00:04:20,635
and I saw two frogs,
123
00:04:20,635 --> 00:04:22,804
one hallucinogenic
124
00:04:22,804 --> 00:04:24,473
and the other not.
125
00:04:24,473 --> 00:04:28,477
(chuckles)
I tried to lick the normal one,
126
00:04:28,477 --> 00:04:29,811
and, by mistake,
127
00:04:29,811 --> 00:04:32,481
I licked the hallucinogenic one.
128
00:04:32,481 --> 00:04:35,233
It really rocked my world.
129
00:04:35,233 --> 00:04:37,903
Why would you lick
either of them?
130
00:04:37,903 --> 00:04:40,238
I'm not sure.
Probably low blood sugar.
131
00:04:40,238 --> 00:04:41,907
But the point is,
132
00:04:41,907 --> 00:04:44,618
I also lost track of reality.
133
00:04:44,618 --> 00:04:46,119
How did you handle it?
134
00:04:46,119 --> 00:04:47,996
I saw a jaguar,
135
00:04:47,996 --> 00:04:52,125
and I realized I didn't care
if it was real or not.
136
00:04:52,125 --> 00:04:55,086
I just hauled my tushy out
of there.
137
00:04:55,086 --> 00:04:56,796
I appreciate the call.
138
00:04:56,796 --> 00:04:58,590
I'm giving you back
to my meemaw now.
139
00:04:58,590 --> 00:05:00,300
Bye!
140
00:05:03,595 --> 00:05:04,596
(quietly):
Hey, John,
141
00:05:04,596 --> 00:05:06,264
any luck?
142
00:05:06,264 --> 00:05:09,142
Not unless you have access
to a jaguar.
143
00:05:09,142 --> 00:05:10,810
I don't think I do.
144
00:05:10,810 --> 00:05:13,855
Really, any jungle cat will do.
145
00:05:13,855 --> 00:05:15,482
Hey, Tom.
146
00:05:15,482 --> 00:05:16,775
George.
147
00:05:16,775 --> 00:05:18,401
Sheldon's not here anymore.
148
00:05:18,401 --> 00:05:19,736
Thought it'd be a while
before I got called back
149
00:05:19,736 --> 00:05:21,363
into the principal's office.
(exhales)
150
00:05:21,363 --> 00:05:23,448
How's he doing?
I miss that kid.
151
00:05:23,448 --> 00:05:26,159
He took a philosophy class
and won't get out of bed
152
00:05:26,159 --> 00:05:28,370
'cause he doesn't know
what's real anymore.
153
00:05:29,371 --> 00:05:30,539
Anyway, uh,
154
00:05:30,539 --> 00:05:32,207
we need to talk about Georgie.
155
00:05:32,207 --> 00:05:34,292
Should've seen that coming.
156
00:05:34,292 --> 00:05:36,002
What's wrong?
Well,
157
00:05:36,002 --> 00:05:37,796
he's been cutting classes.
158
00:05:37,796 --> 00:05:38,880
Already?
159
00:05:38,880 --> 00:05:40,048
Semester's barely started.
160
00:05:40,048 --> 00:05:41,675
He's a go-getter.
161
00:05:41,675 --> 00:05:43,426
Mm.
162
00:05:43,426 --> 00:05:45,178
I'll talk to him.
Thanks.
163
00:05:47,138 --> 00:05:49,140
How's the team looking
this year, George?
164
00:05:49,140 --> 00:05:51,851
(grunts)
We just had
one difficult conversation, Tom.
165
00:05:51,851 --> 00:05:53,687
Let's not have another.
166
00:05:53,687 --> 00:05:55,814
Smart.
ADULT SHELDON:
While my meemaw
167
00:05:55,814 --> 00:05:58,567
wasn't able to acquire
a jungle cat,
168
00:05:58,567 --> 00:06:02,654
the idea of tormenting a child
did tickle her Texan fancy.
169
00:06:02,654 --> 00:06:05,156
(singsongy): Sheldon.
170
00:06:05,156 --> 00:06:06,741
(chicken clucking)
171
00:06:06,741 --> 00:06:10,537
I have someone else
who wants to talk to you.
172
00:06:10,537 --> 00:06:12,330
What are you doing
with that filthy thing?
173
00:06:12,330 --> 00:06:13,623
Why do you care?
174
00:06:13,623 --> 00:06:15,500
If nothing is real,
175
00:06:15,500 --> 00:06:17,168
then neither is the chicken.
176
00:06:17,168 --> 00:06:18,336
(clucking)
177
00:06:19,588 --> 00:06:21,381
Oh. Good.
178
00:06:21,381 --> 00:06:23,758
We're standing now.
That's progress.
179
00:06:23,758 --> 00:06:25,010
Get her out of here.
180
00:06:25,010 --> 00:06:27,012
Well, I would, but...
181
00:06:27,012 --> 00:06:28,847
(chuckles)
apparently,
182
00:06:28,847 --> 00:06:32,017
I can't know
what "here" is.
183
00:06:32,017 --> 00:06:33,602
So maybe I could just...
184
00:06:33,602 --> 00:06:34,728
set her on your bed.
185
00:06:34,728 --> 00:06:36,271
Okay! Okay.
186
00:06:36,271 --> 00:06:37,397
I'll get dressed.
187
00:06:37,397 --> 00:06:38,982
Make it snappy.
188
00:06:39,941 --> 00:06:42,527
This still doesn't solve
my existential crisis.
189
00:06:42,527 --> 00:06:44,195
Say what? You
want to hold her?
190
00:06:44,195 --> 00:06:45,864
(gasps)
No.
191
00:06:45,864 --> 00:06:47,532
Less talk.
192
00:06:47,532 --> 00:06:49,075
More pants.
193
00:06:57,375 --> 00:06:58,668
♪ Tiny bubbles... ♪
194
00:06:58,668 --> 00:06:59,919
What's your first class?
195
00:06:59,919 --> 00:07:02,756
Solid-State Physics
at 11:30.
196
00:07:02,756 --> 00:07:04,758
We'll make it just in time.
197
00:07:04,758 --> 00:07:06,718
Although, does...
And before you say
198
00:07:06,718 --> 00:07:09,554
"Does time even
exist?" it does.
199
00:07:09,554 --> 00:07:11,473
So stop wasting mine.
200
00:07:11,473 --> 00:07:14,225
♪ So here's to
the golden moon... ♪
201
00:07:15,226 --> 00:07:17,103
What's this philosophy teacher's
name?
202
00:07:17,103 --> 00:07:19,147
Professor Ericson. Why?
203
00:07:19,147 --> 00:07:21,232
I might pop in and say hello.
204
00:07:21,232 --> 00:07:23,026
Be careful.
205
00:07:23,026 --> 00:07:25,445
She may make you question
your most deeply held values.
206
00:07:25,445 --> 00:07:27,447
I'm a stubborn old crank.
207
00:07:27,447 --> 00:07:29,240
I'll do just fine.
208
00:07:29,240 --> 00:07:31,660
I'm a stubborn young crank,
and it didn't help me.
209
00:07:31,660 --> 00:07:33,119
♪ Make me feel happy... ♪
210
00:07:35,288 --> 00:07:36,623
You wanted to see me?
211
00:07:37,624 --> 00:07:39,167
Sit down.
212
00:07:39,167 --> 00:07:41,419
Is this gonna take long?
I need to get to class.
213
00:07:41,419 --> 00:07:43,505
From what I hear,
you don't care about that.
214
00:07:43,505 --> 00:07:44,756
Now, sit.
215
00:07:49,928 --> 00:07:51,471
What the hell
you doin'?
216
00:07:51,471 --> 00:07:53,807
I cut a class. Who cares?
217
00:07:53,807 --> 00:07:56,351
It was more than
one, and I care.
218
00:07:56,351 --> 00:07:58,937
You start flunking out, you're
gonna get kicked off the team.
219
00:07:58,937 --> 00:08:00,355
Fine.
220
00:08:00,355 --> 00:08:02,607
Now you don't care
about football?
221
00:08:02,607 --> 00:08:03,942
Not really.
222
00:08:05,110 --> 00:08:06,653
I don't know
what's going on with you,
223
00:08:06,653 --> 00:08:08,363
but you better get your head out
of your ass.
224
00:08:08,363 --> 00:08:09,906
Football's a waste of time.
225
00:08:09,906 --> 00:08:11,866
I have a job I could be at.
226
00:08:11,866 --> 00:08:14,285
You made a commitment to the
team and you're gonna honor it.
227
00:08:14,285 --> 00:08:16,287
(exhales)
228
00:08:16,287 --> 00:08:18,206
We done?
229
00:08:20,166 --> 00:08:21,543
Just get back to class.
230
00:08:23,962 --> 00:08:25,964
And I better see you
at practice.
231
00:08:25,964 --> 00:08:28,341
Well, I don't know if I can
find it with my head up my ass.
232
00:08:30,051 --> 00:08:31,469
LINKLETTER:
So,
233
00:08:31,469 --> 00:08:33,304
according to de Broglie,
lambda equals "h"
234
00:08:33,304 --> 00:08:34,806
divided by "m" times what?
235
00:08:35,724 --> 00:08:36,558
Sheldon.
236
00:08:36,558 --> 00:08:37,976
Is it velocity?
237
00:08:37,976 --> 00:08:39,144
Yes. Now...
238
00:08:39,144 --> 00:08:40,729
Or is it a velociraptor?
239
00:08:40,729 --> 00:08:42,105
I'm sorry?
240
00:08:42,105 --> 00:08:43,857
Perhaps lambda
equals "h" divided
241
00:08:43,857 --> 00:08:45,734
by "m" times a velociraptor.
242
00:08:45,734 --> 00:08:48,153
Or a velveteen
rabbit.
243
00:08:48,153 --> 00:08:49,654
Ooh, or Velveeta.
244
00:08:49,654 --> 00:08:51,072
That's the cheese
my mom puts on broccoli
245
00:08:51,072 --> 00:08:52,741
when she's being fancy.
246
00:08:53,742 --> 00:08:55,535
Is this
from your philosophy class
247
00:08:55,535 --> 00:08:58,037
or perhaps that Ren & Stumpy
I've heard about?
248
00:08:58,037 --> 00:08:59,372
Philosophy.
249
00:09:00,373 --> 00:09:02,375
Mr. Cooper,
do you really believe
250
00:09:02,375 --> 00:09:05,336
that de Broglie's equation
contains Velveeta cheese?
251
00:09:05,336 --> 00:09:08,047
I don't know. Maybe he was just
trying to be fancy.
252
00:09:08,047 --> 00:09:09,924
Hello.
253
00:09:09,924 --> 00:09:11,551
Can I help you?
254
00:09:11,551 --> 00:09:13,094
Hi. I'm Connie Tucker.
255
00:09:13,094 --> 00:09:15,180
I'm Sheldon Cooper's
grandmother.
256
00:09:15,180 --> 00:09:17,891
Oh. Nice to meet you.
257
00:09:17,891 --> 00:09:20,185
He is a remarkable young man.
258
00:09:20,185 --> 00:09:23,688
Yes, he is. He's also
a very impressionable young man.
259
00:09:23,688 --> 00:09:26,608
Kind of like a lump of clay
with a bow tie.
260
00:09:26,608 --> 00:09:30,028
All I did was teach him
about epistemology.
261
00:09:30,028 --> 00:09:31,696
Whatever it is
you're teaching him,
262
00:09:31,696 --> 00:09:34,866
it has made him
question everything.
263
00:09:34,866 --> 00:09:36,451
That's the goal.
264
00:09:36,451 --> 00:09:38,369
Lady, I had to threaten him
with a chicken
265
00:09:38,369 --> 00:09:40,288
so he'd put his pants on.
266
00:09:40,288 --> 00:09:42,248
I don't know
what's gotten into that kid.
267
00:09:42,248 --> 00:09:44,751
He's allowed to not
want to play football.
268
00:09:44,751 --> 00:09:47,879
Can you for once in your life
take my side, Wayne?
269
00:09:47,879 --> 00:09:50,048
Not my fault you're never right.
270
00:09:50,048 --> 00:09:52,634
So you think it's okay
he just quits?
271
00:09:52,634 --> 00:09:54,385
He doesn't get
that much playing time.
272
00:09:55,386 --> 00:09:58,056
Well, in my family,
we don't quit.
273
00:09:58,056 --> 00:10:01,059
Oh, I don't know. You quit
my book club pretty quick.
274
00:10:01,059 --> 00:10:03,269
I'm talking about football!
275
00:10:03,269 --> 00:10:04,938
Why is it so important
to you that he play?
276
00:10:04,938 --> 00:10:07,106
Are you sure you're a coach?
277
00:10:07,106 --> 00:10:11,820
Team sports provides confidence,
leadership, discipline.
278
00:10:11,820 --> 00:10:13,196
So does holding down a job,
279
00:10:13,196 --> 00:10:14,739
which he seems to shine at.
280
00:10:15,740 --> 00:10:17,951
Let's just eat in silence.
281
00:10:17,951 --> 00:10:19,994
Fine.
282
00:10:23,164 --> 00:10:25,583
I still think you should have
read The Color Purple.
283
00:10:25,583 --> 00:10:27,001
We were bawling.
284
00:10:28,586 --> 00:10:30,964
Although tasty, a brick
of cheese is not a number.
285
00:10:30,964 --> 00:10:33,341
Why are we still
talking about this?
286
00:10:33,341 --> 00:10:35,009
Maybe we're not talking at all.
287
00:10:35,009 --> 00:10:37,303
Okay, that's enough for today.
288
00:10:38,263 --> 00:10:40,098
Not your best lecture.
289
00:10:40,098 --> 00:10:42,183
It's fairly normal
for first-time
290
00:10:42,183 --> 00:10:44,853
philosophy students
to have their worldviews shaken.
291
00:10:44,853 --> 00:10:46,479
Do they snap out of it?
292
00:10:46,479 --> 00:10:48,273
Well, you hope.
293
00:10:48,273 --> 00:10:51,359
Professor Ericson,
I insist...
294
00:10:51,359 --> 00:10:53,987
Hello, Connie.
What a pleasant surprise.
295
00:10:53,987 --> 00:10:55,446
Hey.
296
00:10:55,446 --> 00:10:56,656
I'm sorry you're about to see me
297
00:10:56,656 --> 00:10:57,991
speak harshly to my colleague.
298
00:10:57,991 --> 00:10:59,993
Have at it.
Professor Ericson,
299
00:10:59,993 --> 00:11:01,536
I insist that you speak
to this young man
300
00:11:01,536 --> 00:11:03,496
and explain to him
that reality is real,
301
00:11:03,496 --> 00:11:05,790
and it's possible
to know things as fact.
302
00:11:05,790 --> 00:11:08,459
The class is called
"Introduction to Philosophy."
303
00:11:08,459 --> 00:11:09,711
That's what I did.
304
00:11:09,711 --> 00:11:11,462
Well, un-introduce him.
305
00:11:11,462 --> 00:11:13,256
Yes, he's at this school
'cause of his brilliant
306
00:11:13,256 --> 00:11:15,133
scientific mind,
and he spent my last class
307
00:11:15,133 --> 00:11:17,051
talking about
processed cheese.
308
00:11:17,051 --> 00:11:18,469
Sheldon, is that true?
309
00:11:18,469 --> 00:11:19,846
Nothing's true.
310
00:11:19,846 --> 00:11:22,181
You see what you've done?
You broke him.
311
00:11:24,309 --> 00:11:25,852
Hey.
312
00:11:27,729 --> 00:11:30,189
How come you didn't want
to get out of bed this morning?
313
00:11:30,189 --> 00:11:33,526
If I can't know what's real,
what's the point?
314
00:11:33,526 --> 00:11:35,612
You have the right words.
315
00:11:35,612 --> 00:11:38,656
You're just saying them wrong.
316
00:11:38,656 --> 00:11:41,451
It's not, "What's the point?"
317
00:11:41,451 --> 00:11:43,411
It's, "What's the point?"
318
00:11:43,411 --> 00:11:45,663
I don't understand.
319
00:11:45,663 --> 00:11:48,791
Asking these questions
is exciting.
320
00:11:48,791 --> 00:11:51,002
It's what gets me out of bed.
321
00:11:51,002 --> 00:11:53,838
That's interesting.
322
00:11:53,838 --> 00:11:55,340
Richard Feynman did say
323
00:11:55,340 --> 00:11:57,258
the greatest joy in life
is the pleasure of
324
00:11:57,258 --> 00:11:58,718
finding things out.
325
00:11:58,718 --> 00:12:01,095
Feynman--
he's the physics guy, right?
326
00:12:01,095 --> 00:12:03,723
(quietly):
Yes. And your perfume
is beguiling.
327
00:12:04,849 --> 00:12:07,018
It's all making sense to me now.
328
00:12:07,018 --> 00:12:08,353
Thank you.
329
00:12:08,353 --> 00:12:10,229
I am happy to help.
330
00:12:10,229 --> 00:12:12,148
Dr. Linkletter,
I'm dropping your class
331
00:12:12,148 --> 00:12:14,192
and switching my major
to philosophy.
332
00:12:14,192 --> 00:12:15,902
Uh, what?
333
00:12:22,992 --> 00:12:24,744
It's funny. This morning,
I couldn't get out of bed,
334
00:12:24,744 --> 00:12:28,247
and now I stand before a whole
new exciting field of study.
335
00:12:28,247 --> 00:12:31,709
Well, maybe instead
of making this big switch,
336
00:12:31,709 --> 00:12:33,503
you could study both.
337
00:12:33,503 --> 00:12:36,464
You could be
physics-philosophy guy.
338
00:12:36,464 --> 00:12:38,383
You sound like
a logical positivist.
339
00:12:38,383 --> 00:12:40,218
That's a branch of philosophy
that maintains
340
00:12:40,218 --> 00:12:42,929
the best way to philosophize
is through science.
341
00:12:42,929 --> 00:12:44,597
Well, there you go.
Do that.
342
00:12:44,597 --> 00:12:46,891
It may be too early
to specialize.
343
00:12:46,891 --> 00:12:49,268
I've only been a philosopher
for 15 minutes.
344
00:12:49,268 --> 00:12:53,064
Did you notice Dr. Linkletter
didn't look too thrilled
345
00:12:53,064 --> 00:12:54,899
about you leaving science?
346
00:12:54,899 --> 00:12:56,567
He never looks thrilled
about anything.
347
00:12:56,567 --> 00:12:59,153
I think that's
just his face.
348
00:12:59,153 --> 00:13:01,948
That's the face.
349
00:13:01,948 --> 00:13:03,992
(door opens, chimes)
350
00:13:06,369 --> 00:13:08,079
Why the hell weren't
you at practice?
351
00:13:08,079 --> 00:13:09,622
Can't talk right now.
I'm working.
352
00:13:09,622 --> 00:13:11,749
Well, you're gonna
talk about it.
353
00:13:12,750 --> 00:13:14,419
What do you want from me?
354
00:13:14,419 --> 00:13:16,587
I don't want to play football.
I want to work.
355
00:13:16,587 --> 00:13:18,965
You have your whole life
to hold down a job.
356
00:13:18,965 --> 00:13:20,299
Hey,
357
00:13:20,299 --> 00:13:21,759
I like my job.
358
00:13:21,759 --> 00:13:23,511
It's not my problem
you hate yours.
359
00:13:29,308 --> 00:13:31,352
Do whatever you want.
360
00:13:31,352 --> 00:13:33,479
ADULT SHELDON:
To figure out
361
00:13:33,479 --> 00:13:35,648
which school of philosophy
suited me best,
362
00:13:35,648 --> 00:13:38,151
I decided to sample each one.
363
00:13:38,151 --> 00:13:41,195
The same way I determined
my favorite flavor of oatmeal--
364
00:13:41,195 --> 00:13:43,281
plain.
365
00:13:44,782 --> 00:13:46,367
(TV plays quietly)
366
00:13:46,367 --> 00:13:47,952
What are you doing?
367
00:13:47,952 --> 00:13:49,954
I'm practicing the
philosophy of cynicism--
368
00:13:49,954 --> 00:13:51,622
the ancient Greek view
369
00:13:51,622 --> 00:13:53,541
that the rules of society
should be ignored.
370
00:13:53,541 --> 00:13:56,085
If you're gonna break rules,
you can do better than that.
371
00:13:56,085 --> 00:13:58,087
How?
372
00:13:58,087 --> 00:13:59,672
(shouts)
373
00:13:59,672 --> 00:14:01,466
ADULT SHELDON:
Renaissance humanism is
374
00:14:01,466 --> 00:14:04,385
finding meaning
in the human form through art.
375
00:14:04,385 --> 00:14:07,055
Can I move?
No.
376
00:14:07,055 --> 00:14:08,639
But my butt itches.
377
00:14:08,639 --> 00:14:10,183
Scratch it on your own time.
378
00:14:13,686 --> 00:14:15,313
ADULT SHELDON:
Nihilists believe
379
00:14:15,313 --> 00:14:16,856
that there's no point
to anything,
380
00:14:16,856 --> 00:14:18,107
because it all ends
in nothingness.
381
00:14:18,107 --> 00:14:20,401
Mind if I put on MTV?
382
00:14:20,401 --> 00:14:22,320
Doesn't matter.
We're all gonna die anyway.
383
00:14:22,320 --> 00:14:24,489
Deep thought, dingus.
384
00:14:24,489 --> 00:14:26,866
ADULT SHELDON:
Traditionalism is the philosophy
385
00:14:26,866 --> 00:14:29,327
that the best way of life
is a return to the past.
386
00:14:29,327 --> 00:14:30,995
What are you doing?
387
00:14:30,995 --> 00:14:34,707
Making my own butter,
like in olden times.
388
00:14:34,707 --> 00:14:36,042
That's stupid.
389
00:14:37,043 --> 00:14:40,004
ADULT SHELDON:
My arms are still sore.
390
00:14:40,004 --> 00:14:42,131
Altruism is the belief
that we should live
391
00:14:42,131 --> 00:14:44,759
only by bringing happiness
to others.
392
00:14:44,759 --> 00:14:45,843
These are for you.
393
00:14:45,843 --> 00:14:47,261
Thanks.
394
00:14:47,261 --> 00:14:48,763
What the hell?!
395
00:14:48,763 --> 00:14:50,765
ADULT SHELDON:
Egoism is the belief
396
00:14:50,765 --> 00:14:53,017
that we should live only by
bringing happiness to ourselves.
397
00:14:53,017 --> 00:14:55,603
Mmm. These are pretty good.
398
00:14:55,603 --> 00:14:57,647
ADULT SHELDON:
Transcendentalists were
399
00:14:57,647 --> 00:15:00,024
philosophers who believed
that our deepest connection
400
00:15:00,024 --> 00:15:02,026
is with nature.
401
00:15:02,026 --> 00:15:04,237
Eh.
402
00:15:10,201 --> 00:15:12,578
I'm beautiful.
403
00:15:14,205 --> 00:15:15,706
GEORGE SR.:
And then Georgie accuses me
404
00:15:15,706 --> 00:15:17,583
of hating my job.
405
00:15:17,583 --> 00:15:20,378
Is this where
I thought I'd end up? No.
406
00:15:20,378 --> 00:15:22,255
Is this where
you thought you'd end up?
407
00:15:22,255 --> 00:15:24,465
I thought I'd be working
at my father's funeral home
408
00:15:24,465 --> 00:15:26,384
sewing people's eyes shut.
409
00:15:26,384 --> 00:15:28,052
My life turned out great.
410
00:15:28,052 --> 00:15:29,762
Well, good for you.
411
00:15:29,762 --> 00:15:31,264
(laughs)
412
00:15:31,264 --> 00:15:33,808
The worst part is,
I think Georgie's right.
413
00:15:35,143 --> 00:15:36,727
You're not happy at work?
414
00:15:36,727 --> 00:15:38,563
I can see if my
dad's hiring.
415
00:15:38,563 --> 00:15:39,939
How are your sewing skills?
416
00:15:39,939 --> 00:15:42,817
It's not work.
417
00:15:42,817 --> 00:15:44,443
(sighs)
418
00:15:44,443 --> 00:15:46,821
Honestly, I don't know
if I'm happy anywhere.
419
00:15:49,657 --> 00:15:52,785
Ugh. When I asked y'all
to hang for a drink,
420
00:15:52,785 --> 00:15:55,163
I didn't know you were
gonna be such a bummer.
421
00:15:55,163 --> 00:15:56,455
(laughs)
422
00:15:57,957 --> 00:16:00,793
Geez Louise.
423
00:16:00,793 --> 00:16:03,588
♪ Amarillo is where I'll be. ♪
424
00:16:10,011 --> 00:16:11,929
(knocking)
425
00:16:11,929 --> 00:16:13,681
Dr. Linkletter?
Sheldon.
426
00:16:13,681 --> 00:16:15,141
Good to see you.
427
00:16:15,141 --> 00:16:16,976
Come on in.
I don't suppose
428
00:16:16,976 --> 00:16:18,978
you're here to discuss physics,
are you?
429
00:16:18,978 --> 00:16:20,188
As a matter of fact, I am.
430
00:16:20,188 --> 00:16:21,355
Excellent.
431
00:16:21,355 --> 00:16:22,690
I'm here to drop your class.
432
00:16:22,690 --> 00:16:24,192
I just need you to sign this.
433
00:16:24,192 --> 00:16:26,819
(exhales)
Have a seat.
434
00:16:26,819 --> 00:16:28,821
Sheldon,
435
00:16:28,821 --> 00:16:30,531
I don't know
if you thought this through,
436
00:16:30,531 --> 00:16:32,366
but you're here
on a physics scholarship,
437
00:16:32,366 --> 00:16:35,536
and switching to philosophy
may not be well-received.
438
00:16:35,536 --> 00:16:36,954
Ordinarily, I'd be concerned,
439
00:16:36,954 --> 00:16:38,331
but I'm currently
embracing hedonism.
440
00:16:38,331 --> 00:16:39,749
Sheldon,
441
00:16:39,749 --> 00:16:41,167
I've been made
responsible for you,
442
00:16:41,167 --> 00:16:42,793
and so far,
it's not going very well.
443
00:16:42,793 --> 00:16:44,128
You were admitted
to this university
444
00:16:44,128 --> 00:16:45,922
for your scientific acumen.
445
00:16:45,922 --> 00:16:48,883
And changing majors could have
serious repercussions.
446
00:16:48,883 --> 00:16:49,967
Son,
447
00:16:49,967 --> 00:16:51,469
please try to understand.
448
00:16:51,469 --> 00:16:53,512
If you abandon physics
for philosophy,
449
00:16:53,512 --> 00:16:55,431
(fading):
you're gonna be missing
out on the opportunity
450
00:16:55,431 --> 00:16:57,016
to be part of something
great. Possibly...
451
00:16:57,016 --> 00:16:58,726
♪ Tiny bubbles... ♪
452
00:16:58,726 --> 00:17:00,269
ADULT SHELDON:
As Dr. Linkletter prattled on,
453
00:17:00,269 --> 00:17:01,896
I couldn't help but notice
454
00:17:01,896 --> 00:17:04,315
the beauty
of that ephemeral bubble.
455
00:17:04,315 --> 00:17:07,401
I wondered if perhaps
we're all just bubbles,
456
00:17:07,401 --> 00:17:10,321
being buffeted through life
on a stream of currents
457
00:17:10,321 --> 00:17:12,156
beyond our understanding.
♪ Tiny bubbles... ♪
458
00:17:12,156 --> 00:17:14,492
Look at it.
The local minimization achieves
459
00:17:14,492 --> 00:17:17,828
a global maximization,
and it's nearly perfect.
460
00:17:17,828 --> 00:17:19,538
I wondered if this was the key
461
00:17:19,538 --> 00:17:21,916
to the smoothness of matter
in the universe.
462
00:17:21,916 --> 00:17:25,836
The cosmic web of stars and
galaxies could hold it together
463
00:17:25,836 --> 00:17:28,172
like the web
of polymers in soap!
464
00:17:28,172 --> 00:17:30,174
This could be
a whole new area of research.
465
00:17:30,174 --> 00:17:32,009
Changing majors
466
00:17:32,009 --> 00:17:34,345
would be a huge mistake,
but if this is what
467
00:17:34,345 --> 00:17:37,640
you really want, here you go.
468
00:17:40,059 --> 00:17:42,103
Sheldon?
What?
469
00:17:42,103 --> 00:17:44,689
Here you go.
Good luck with philosophy.
470
00:17:44,689 --> 00:17:47,358
Oh, I'm back on science now.
I have work to do.
471
00:17:47,358 --> 00:17:52,363
♪ Got a feeling that I'm gonna
love you till the end of time. ♪
32892
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.