Original subtitles

(MultiCom Jingle)

(sentimental music)

- [Margaret] Life is full of surprises.

I married young, had four kids,

then my husband left, then my children left.

And then came the biggest surprise of all.

I got a chance to start over.

My life was on its way.

My kids, that's another story.

- [Mary] I always had this dream I'd fall in love,

get married, and have children.

At least a part of my dream came true.

- [Dennis] No matter what they say,

good sex and money are not

the only priories in my life.

They're two of them, but I'm not gonna apologize for that.

- [Anne] People need relationships,

and good relationships need patience,

trust, and understanding,

all the qualities I lack.

- [Andrew] I met a wonderful woman.

We had two great kids.

She didn't wanna be a mother.

I did.

- [Anne] Do you want to share a place?

- [Mary] But I'm having a baby.

- [Anne] It doesn't look like I'm gonna be a mother

anytime soon, but it couldn't hurt to practice.

- [Mary] I'd like that.

- [Margaret] You look a little nervous about all this, John.

- [John] Nervous?

(laughs) Nah.

Not as long as you're with me.

- [Margaret] Family has been the one constant in my life.

- [John] Well, now you've got another constant in your life.

- [Margaret] Not my life, our life.

(lock clicking)

Now don't you drop me!

- (laughing) Would I do that to my new bride?

Come here.

Welcome home, Mrs. Hix.

- Welcome home, Mr. Hix.

- Listen.

- No children. - Ah.

- No grandchildren, no friends, just us.

- Silence, golden silence.

- Um, I wonder if you would

take the bags upstairs and wait for me.

- Ah. (laughs)

Wow.

- Close your eyes.

- (laughs) Then how am I supposed to look at you?

- You can look at me later.

Keep them closed. - Yeah, yeah.

- Don't peek.

(forceful exhaling)

All right, open your mouth.

- My mouth. - Open your mouth.

- Uh-huh.

- Here it comes.

- Oh my god! - You like that?

(John moaning) (Margaret laughing)

I love you, John.

- I love you too, Mrs. Hix.

- You know, I haven't felt this good

about my life in a long time.

- And we got the best part of our lives ahead,

just us.

(chuckling)

Give me that thing.

- What do you have in mind?

- Com here, I'll show you.

- Not bad. - Not bad?

Not what you said before.

- When?

Where? - Remember last week?

You said, bad! - Oh!

(laughing)

- [Mary] No, they didn't ask, I told them.

- You are never gonna get a job

if you keep telling them you're pregnant.

- I can't lie, Anne.

- Well, I'm not saying lie.

I'm saying don't tell the truth.

They'll find out the truth eventually.

And then you can tell them you miraculously conceived

after you started working.

I'm just being pragmatic about your situation.

You don't have any skills.

- I have skills!

- Yeah, okay, you were a nun at a mission in Arizona.

That's nice, but you've never

actually been in the workforce.

Now don't make getting a job

any harder on yourself.

- You promised me you'd quit since I'm pregnant.

- Well, I did quit.

That's the first one I've had,

and I'm having it because you won't listen to me.

(toilet flushes)

You got a kid coming, Mar, that aren't cheap to raise.

I'm just trying to help, you know.

Oh forget it, forget it!

I'm outta here.

(door bangs)

(upbeat rock music)

(engine revving)

(siren wailing)

(police radio chattering)

Gee, officer, I'm really sorry.

Yeah, I was so busy watching out

for those children by the ice cream truck,

I must have missed the stop sign.

- There aren't any children or an ice cream truck.

Those are construction workers

around a food coach, but nice try.

- Ah, are you gonna write me up?

- Yes ma'am, I am.

- Then save the chatter, Kojak.

I'm not interested.

- License and registration please.

- Yeah, yeah.

I pay your salary, you know.

I pay for your gun and the one bullet

they allow ya, Barney Fife.

- (laughs) You know, you're dating yourself

with the Barney Fife line.

- (laughs) Yeah, I'm sure that's all you ever do

is date yourself.

- Not really.

Most women find me pretty nice to be around.

Ma'am, registration?

- I'm not your jockey's besAAAretta.

I'm getting it.

Here.

Right away, Officer Lundgren.

- Nick.

- [Dennis] Oh!

- [Joy] Mm, yeah.

- Wow, oh.

(Dennis exhales forcefully)

(laughs)

What were we doing here?

Oh yeah.

(laughs)

That photocopy machine was a good idea.

- Yeah.

Oh, I'm gonna miss you, Dennis.

- Miss?

What do you mean, miss?

- Oh, I guess there's no easy way to say this,

but, you're fired.

(laughs)

No, no, no, I mean, you're fired.

I'd love to keep you, but with the cut backs

I have to let people go.

Seniority and productivity

are the only criteria I can count.

- Don't technique and, um, dexterity

count for anything?

- I'm gonna miss you, Dennis.

There's nothing I can do.

(toilet flushing)

(Margaret coughing)

- Honey.

- [Margaret] Oh, come in.

- Honey, I'm running la...

You okay?

- The next time I tell you

I have a craving for Mexican food,

tell me how I will feel the next day.

(door bangs)

Anne?

Mary?

- What are they doing stopping by so early?

- I don't know, but I'm gonna tell 'em to stop it.

They don't know what we're doing in the morning.

- [John] Well, we're not gonna be doing much

if you're not feeling well.

- I'll go see my doctor.

Anne?

Mary?

- [Jersey] Grandma, Grandpa, hi!

- Jersey, Amy! - Hi, did you miss us?

- What are you doing here?

Where's your daddy? - He's right here.

We come all the way from Florida

and there's no coffee made?

- Andrew, what are you doing here?

- Playing hooky.

Painting boats in the summer is dead,

so after seeing the family for the wedding

we decided we missed everybody

and we thought we'd drive up and surprise you.

So, how's married life?

- Terrific.

How long you staying?

- Not long.

So anyway, we've been driving all night

and we're starved, so how about I fix the girls

a little breakfast and then we let them sleep,

and then we can talk. - Sure, fine.

They can go on up and start cleaning up.

- Got their stuff out in the truck.

- You can stay in Anne and Mary's old room.

- [Amy] All right!

- Why don't you run along.

You know where the bathroom is.

- I get Mary's bed! - Nuh-uh!

(laughing)

- Ah, you don't mind this?

- No, no.

But why is he really here?

- That's what I was wondering.

- I wish we could help you out, Dennis,

but we don't have an opening.

We're going through a consolidation.

Hell, I even have a new boss transferring in from Tulsa.

I have to find him a place to live.

- What about renting my condo?

- Your place would be great,

but aren't you gonna keep it?

- I may go home, get a job there.

They'd jump at the chance

to get someone with my experience.

- Well, Dennis, I wish we had an opening.

I'd snap you up.

But, uh, if you're serious about the condo,

I'll take it.

- Excuse me, um, this card's over the limit.

Do you have another one?

- Sorry. (laughs)

My travel agent must have maxed it out.

- Yeah, let me get it.

You saved me a lotta time finding a place for my boss.

- I'll let him pay if you give me your phone number.

- Well, does he tip 20%?

- I don't know.

Do you tip 20%, Gene?

- For you, Dennis, 20%.

(upbeat music)

- Yes, I'm the listing realtor for that property.

All right, we'll go take a look.

Yes, bye bye.

Oh, John! (laughing)

John Hix, what are you doing here?

What are you doing here?

- I thought I'd come home

and have lunch with my wife.

- I like that idea.

- You like this?

- Mm-hm.

(phone ringing)

You know, they're just watching

and waiting for the first chance to spoil the mood.

Margaret Hix.

Well hello, Denny!

We're great, great.

Oh, it's nice to hear your voice.

What,

why are you calling in the middle of the day, honey?

You all right, you sick?

Uh-huh.

Uh-huh.

No, that'd be fine.

Yep, you could stay here.

Okay, we'll see you.

I love you.

Denny's lost his job.

- Is that what he said?

- Nope, that's what he didn't say.

Andrew is still evading me about why he's come home

and now Dennis is coming back to town.

- Well, at least Anne doesn't wanna move in.

- Oh honey, if the girls come in here

we are leaving.

(both laughing)

Oh, I didn't ask you if it was all right

if Dennis comes and stays here.

- Oh, no-- - No!

Well no, this is your home too.

Oh, I'm treating you like you're still visiting.

- No, no, your kids are visiting.

I'm staying.

I can't say I'm thrilled with them being here,

but, um, we'll survive.

- That just feels so good.

- Does it?

Well, why don't you come upstairs with me.

- You know, I think I might get to like

this newlywed stuff.

- Newlywed stuff?

Are you kidding me?

We are going to be doing this

till they cart us off to the home.

- Oh goody! - Oh yes!

(laughing)

In another four years, we're gonna have

enough saved up to retire,

and then we are gonna make love

in every major city in Europe.

- Oh, I'll start booking rooms.

(upbeat music)

- [Mary] I can't believe I let you

talk me into coming here.

I am so embarrassed.

Why couldn't we go bowling?

- [Anne] Bowling?

Will you please get a life?

You've gotta get out and circulate!

We're trying to find that baby a father.

- I look like a bimbo!

A pregnant bimbo.

I'm squishing my baby in this dress.

- You look great.

And don't tell anyone you're pregnant.

It's not something you say

when a guy's trying to buy you a drink.

- Hi.

I'm Bradley James.

- Mary Becker.

- I saw you come in.

Best lookin' woman in this place tonight.

- [Mary] Thank you.

- Hey, you know what?

I just got a new Porsche.

Wanna take a look?

- What's the matter with it?

- No, nothing, I was hoping you'd wanna

take a ride, get out of here, do something.

- Oh.

Do you bowl?

- Bowl?

- Bowl.

Not what you're thinking, sleazo.

- Anne, quit being rude.

I almost had him talked into taking me bowling.

- Mary, he doesn't want to go bowling, do you?

Bradley with the Porsche.

- Well, I thought we could go back to my place.

It's quieter.

Less crowded.

What do you say?

I promise I'll show you a good time.

- Oh, your place.

No.

No way.

I'm already pregnant.

- Uh, vodka collins, and for my naive sister,

a virgin Mary.

- [Nick] Put your hands on the bar and don't move.

- Shouldn't you be out busting little old ladies?

- Actually, I'm working undercover here

watching for underage drinkers.

- Oh, then what are you bothering me for?

You know I'm of consenting age.

Oh, uh, this is the bozo who gave me the ticket.

- Hi!

- Nick Lundgren.

- Mary Becker, Anne's sister.

- Hey, don't be too nice to him, Mary.

He single-handedly raised my insurance rates.

- Truce.

- Are you trying to get on my good side?

- Have one?

- You already got two strikes against you.

You burned me, and you're a guy.

I've traveled that road, thank you.

- Not with me.

Come on and dance.

- Will you get out of here?

- Oh, Anne, he's not asking you to go look at his car.

Go and dance.

- What are you afraid of, having a good time?

Or are you just afraid of me?

- Afraid of you?

I'll tell you what.

Instead of dancing, you close your eyes

and count and I'll go hide.

When you get to 10, you open your eyes,

you find me gone.

- Is that a no?

- You're good at this game.

I'd say see you around, but if I do see you

it'll probably cost me more money, so,

Mary.

- She blows a lotta smoke but she's really a softie.

Nice meeting you.

- It's nice to meet you.

- The crowd goes wild.

The swish.

So I gotta make this shot?

- Yep, from your knees. - All right.

(groans)

Oh!

You guys win.

- Papa, are there places to play basketball in Canada?

- In the summer.

In the winter, we'll go sledding and make snowmen.

- Why can't we go back to Florida?

- Because there's bad memories there.

- Mommy left us in Florida.

- Oh come on, you guys.

Canada's gonna be fun.

- My friends won't be there.

- You'll make new friends.

It's for the best, okay?

Okay?

Okay?

Okay?

Okay, okay, okay, okay? - Okay, okay!

- All right.

- Will Grandma and John come up and see us?

- We'll see, honey.

- Can we ask 'em?

- Papa said we can't tell anybody, stupid.

- How many times I gotta tell you

not to call your sister stupid.

I don't want Grandma to know right now.

We'll tell 'em later.

It's our secret, okay?

Good.

(imitating lock clicking)

(girls giggling)

Ha, hark!

Is that an ice cream truck I hear?

(chiming music)

- Dad!

- What could you possibly want?

(both laugh)

- Hi, sit down.

I'll call you back.

- Hello, Winona. - Hi.

Mary was just in yesterday.

She's doing great.

- Well, then I guess you didn't ask me here

to talk about Mary.

- No, no, this is about you.

Margaret, you and John, you're sexually active.

- Yes.

(clears throat) Yes.

- And you're not using protection?

- (laughs) No, I haven't since I started the change.

- Maybe you should have.

I never thought I'd be telling you this,

especially now,

but you're about eight weeks pregnant.

(nervous laughing)

- Well, I, how can I?

I'm too old.

I can't be, I can't be!

- Are you still having periods?

- Yeah, but, sometimes I go for months.

- You're still ovulating,

so you can still get pregnant.

I'm gonna have you meet with Dr. Chang.

He specializes in high-risk pregnancies.

- High risk.

- There's a one in four chance

the baby will be born with an abnormality.

Dr. Chang can run a test called a CVS.

- How about one of those amnio things?

- Well, CVS can be done earlier

so there's more time to make decisions.

I suppose I should ask you

if you and John want this child.

- John.

We never talked about it.

As a matter of fact, we never really even thought about it.

- I'm gonna set up the appointment with Dr. Chang,

and you talk to John.

- That'll be fine.

- Margaret.

I don't know if congratulations are in order,

but, congratulations.

(soft instrumental music)

(calculator beeping)

- Hi.

- Hi. - Hi.

- I was just thinkin' about coming upstairs.

I thought maybe we could take

a nice long, hot bath together.

(laughing)

- I saw Dr. Davis today.

- Ah.

This doesn't sound good.

- No, no, it's not bad.

Actually, it's, it's not good, either.

In fact, I don't know what it is.

- Well, I won't either unless you tell me.

- I'm pregnant.

(laughing)

My god.

Are, are you all right?

- Yes, (laughing) I'm fine.

I'm pregnant, but I'm fine.

I was wondering how you'd take it.

- Well, I'm stunned, that's how I'm taking it.

I'm just glad you're okay.

You are okay, aren't you?

You're not just telling me that.

- I am fine.

Dr. Davis wants me, wants us,

to go and see Dr. Chang, an obstetrician.

- Oh good, yeah, all right.

Okay, we should get this taken care of right away.

- Oh, could we just keep this between us, though?

I don't want the kids to know.

- (laughs) I can just hear them.

- Oh, I don't want to hear it!

(laughing)

Oh, John.

- Listen to me, listen to me, listen to me.

Everything is gonna be okay.

- (laughs) Oh, I'm so glad you're with me.

Oh John, John, I'm so glad!

(ball thumping)

- Andy.

- Mom said you were comin'.

Got fired, huh?

- I wasn't fired.

My company's restructuring

so I thought I'd look around.

What are you doin' here?

- I wanted the girls to spend more time

with the family.

Nice wheels. - Thanks.

So, the whole family's back in town, huh?

Hey, watch the clothes, would ya?

- Yeah, we're both back in our old room again.

- Hey Andy, for both our sanity,

why don't you take Anne and Mary's room, all right?

- [Andrew] Well, my girls are in there.

But you could sleep downstairs.

- Well I'm not sleepin' on that couch bed.

- [Andrew] Well then you're gonna have

to get used to the smell of my feet.

- Well just remember, I'm here on business, all right?

I won't be sleepin' till noon

and layin' around the house all day.

This isn't vacation for me.

- Oh.

Well I'll try to keep that in mind, sir.

- Well, the CVS is normal.

You are carrying a healthy male fetus.

- Well that's good news.

- How rare is a pregnancy like this?

- It's rare, but with changes in attitude

towards health and better medical care, it happens.

But there are still many things

that could go wrong for the fetus as well as yourself.

- Such as?

- For Margaret, there is a chance

of developing high blood pressure

and blood sugar problems.

Having a miscarriage or going into premature labor

are definite concerns.

If you decide to take this pregnancy to term,

your heart and lungs will be monitored

and you will require more frequent office visits.

- I understand.

- And if you decide to terminate the pregnancy,

that should be done during the first trimester.

You have a few weeks.

- Right.

- If you have any further questions,

please don't hesitate to call me.

- Thank you, Doctor.

- Okay.

- [Margaret] Well that was good news.

- Yeah.

I think we ought to get this over with right away.

- You know what?

We could take Denny and Andrew's room

and make it into the nursery.

No, the girls' room is closer.

That would be easier to convert.

- Margaret, hello.

Are you listening to me?

Did you listen to Dr. Chang? - Yeah.

- We're not taking any chances

where your health is concerned.

- I'm in great health.

The baby and I are both fine.

- No, Margaret, there are a lot of things

that could go wrong.

That's what he said.

- John, this is your son I'm carrying.

Well, that means something to me.

- Honey, you're the only thing

that means anything to me,

and you're all I'm worried about.

- Oh John, don't worry.

Everything's fine.

(gentle piano music)

- No one is gonna hire a woman that they know

has to leave in six months.

- And you shouldn't feel obligated to tell them.

Hey, what do I have to say to get through to you?

(doorbell ringing)

- Whoever you are, you're saving me from a lecture.

Nick, hi.

- Hi. - Come in.

- How did you find out where I live?

- Your drivers license, remember?

I think you owe me an apology.

- [Anne] For what?

- For dumpin' on me the other night.

- Get a grip.

You thought you were gonna wake up in my bed.

- We'd just met.

What makes you think I wanted to sleep with you?

- A woman knows.

- Well, disconnect your intuition from your ego.

- I'm just gonna go clean out

the kitchen cabinets or something.

- So, you gonna apologize?

- As soon as you apologize for giving me the ticket.

- You're being a pain, Anne.

- Shut up and clean, Cinderella.

- You broke the law.

All I did was ask you to dance.

And I think you owe me lunch.

- I am not buying you lunch.

- Oh, yes you are.

Because I need some peace and quiet.

Move.

Now!

And put on something nice.

- Pregnant women.

I swear, I hope I never deal with another.

- See what I said about her being a softie?

- Caught ya alone.

Can we talk?

- Here.

Have you seen the roses?

Do you know that I planted those

the year Anne graduated high school?

And they get more beautiful every year.

- Margaret, you're not listening to me again.

- I am listeing to every word you're saying.

I don't want to have an argument

in the back yard where the kids can hear us.

- Sweetie, I'm worried about what this pregnancy

could do to you.

- Well, I'm very appreciative of the fact

that you're worried, but,

hm, you know.

Hey, have you filled that office position yet

that Angela left?

- No.

- What about Mary?

Huh?

You know she's a good worker.

And oh, would she be grateful, John.

- No, I don't know.

I mean, Mary's family and I demand a lot

from the people that work for me.

- Hey you guys, guess what?

John's giving me a job!

- Happy day! - Hey-oh!

- Yeah, isn't that great?

- We are now a two income family.

- I am such an easy mark.

- You really are, honey.

- Thank you, John.

- Well, this calls for a toast.

- Oh, just water for me, thanks.

- Mom? - Make that two waters.

- What, are you pregnant too?

(laughing)

- So here is to the working women in the family.

Cheers! - Cheers!

- Hear, hear! - Hear, hear, hear!

- [Anne] Yes!

- What's goin' on here?

- Oh, the doctor just suggested

that I not drink since I've been so tired.

- What did the doctor say?

- Mom, if something's wrong, you should tell us.

- They're all gonna find out anyway,

and they are sitting down.

- Well, honey, you're the one

who didn't wanna tell 'em.

- Uh, hello, we're still here.

- I am pregnant.

(laughing)

- Okay.

- Well, here's to that.

I've already had my two.

Took me years to get my figure back, but, uh....

(laughing)

- Your mother wasn't making a joke.

- Uh, this can't be.

You're too old.

- Obviously not.

- Well, what about complications

and the baby's health?

- Mom, you don't want a baby at your age.

- I think that's Mom's decision.

- Think about this long and hard, Mom.

You just got rid of us.

- Then why are you still here?

I think this family needs to learn

the difference between an announcement and a discussion.

This was an announcement.

It's not up for discussion.

You got that?

(doorbell ringing)

- I'll get it. - I'll get it.

- I'll get it.

Yes?

- We're looking for Andrew Becker.

- What is this regarding?

- I'd rather talk to Mr. Becker about that.

- [Andrew] Mary, who's there?

- Are you Andrew Becker?

- Could be.

Maybe, why?

- Well, we received some papers

from the courts of Florida.

Your ex-wife claims that you took your daughters

out of state without custodial permission.

- She's not my ex-wife.

We were never married.

I have custody.

- Okay, well, would you like to come downtown?

I'd like to get this cleared up.

- Look, um,

we just sat down to dinner.

If you'd just let us finish eating,

I'll come down, we can settle this.

- Well, the sooner you come with us

the sooner you can come back and enjoy your evening.

- Show me a warrant.

- Look, this is not a debate. - I'm not debating.

- Come on. - Hey, hey.

- Get your hands off me, huh?

Okay, all right, I'm going.

Mom, take care of the girls.

Don't let anyone touch 'em until I get back, all right?

- Where are they taking my dad?

- I'll call my lawyer, Andrew.

- Go bite 'em, Aunt Anne!

Don't let 'em take away my dad!

- Uh, wait a minute.

Do you know Nick Lundgren?

He and I are really good friends.

- Look, let me go or you're gonna

be taking a ride with us.

- Anne, don't.

- I said wait a minute!

Hey, who do you think you are, Sonny Crockett?

- Huh, that's good.

Okay, you can come downtown.

- Denny, don't!

You'll just make it worse.

- Mary, get the video camera!

- What a sweetheart.

(engine igniting)

(door buzzing)

- You know, that was very good dinner.

It's too bad we didn't get to eat it.

- Yeah.

Well, I ate it.

- Why didn't you tell me?

- What was I gonna say?

That the woman who walked out on me two years ago

has filed a stack of papers this thick?

That I'm gonna lose my family?

I've disappointed you enough.

- You have never disappointed me, Andrew.

If you told me, maybe we could have avoided this.

- (laughs) I thought you, uh,

needed a little bit more excitement in your life.

- Well. (chuckles)

- Mom, they're gonna take away my girls.

- No, they're not.

No, they're not.

(somber instrumental music)

- [Anne] Do we ever really know

the people we're in love with?

- [Nick] I hope.

Otherwise there's a lot of married people

out there who are in for a rude awakening.

- I was married. - Really?

- Twice. - You were married twice?

- Mm-hm.

- Well, either you're a lousy judge of character

or you're hell on wheels.

- A little of both.

- Your sister tells me you're a cream puff.

- Yeah?

Ignore her.

She's heavily sedated.

(gentle string music)

You ever been married?

- Nope.

- You ever been kissed?

- Once or twice.

- How does that compare

with the other kisses you've had?

- Well, they weren't near as good,

but they lasted a lot longer.

- You'll have to be patient.

So why'd you become a cop?

- To meet women.

(Anne laughs)

My uncle who raised me is a cop.

I liked what he was about.

- Your folks dead?

- No, my mother's in Los Angeles.

My father, I don't know.

When they divorced, I moved here

to live with my uncle.

Neither of my folks were ready to be parents.

- Mm, my dad was like that.

Thank God for my mom.

- Oh no, you wouldn't.

(laughing) (Anne squeals)

- I will always keep you guessing.

(squealing)

- [Nick] Oh, watch out!

(laughing)

- What are you doing?

- Oh, I was gonna change because Anne's bringing

her new boyfriend over for dinner.

Look what I found. (laughs)

I haven't had this on since I was carrying Anne.

I'm back in style.

- Margaret, could we talk about this pregnancy?

- How is Mary working out?

- Great.

Margaret, we have to do this now.

We are nearing the end of the trimester.

- John, John.

This baby's a part of us.

Having your son is, it's a gift.

And just think how much we can give him.

You know, when I raised mine, I was all alone.

This time I'll have you.

- Honey, if you wanna have a child,

we can talk about it.

We can adopt in the future,

after we've done some of the things we wanna do.

But I am not willing to risk

something happening to you now.

- We can't adopt.

I'm too old.

I won't qualify.

This is our only chance, John.

I didn't plan on this happening, but it did.

I don't wanna turn my back on it.

I'm pro-choice, you know, but I've made mine.

- You know, when we got married

I thought the emphasis was gonna shift

from you and me to us.

You're still doing what you wanna do,

not what's best for us.

- Well, what about you?

- Margaret, the risky part of the pregnancy is coming up.

I am worried about you, about us.

This is gonna change our lives.

I thought you were happy

with what we wanted for our future.

I don't know.

Maybe we didn't know each other

as well as we thought when we got married.

- Well, I guess marriage does

just bring a lot of surprises.

You have to deal with 'em.

- No, Margaret, we have to deal with 'em,

and you're not making that possible.

(somber piano music)

- Hot stuff, hot stuff, hot stuff.

Ooh! - Hot, hot, hot!

Jersey, look out.

- Wait a minute, you met Anne giving her a ticket?

Your bad driving finally paid off, huh?

- Have you ever shot somebody?

- Jersey! - No, I haven't.

- The night's still young, though.

- Oh, sorry I'm late.

I had to clean out some old files.

- Okay everybody, listen up.

Dennis, come on to dinner.

Nick, yeah, sit here next to Anne here.

- Gee, I thought we'd just sit him

in the other room with a TV tray.

- No, honey, we're saving that for you,

just in case.

- Nice to see she acts this way at home, too.

- I don't know if nice is the right word, Nick,

but she's consistent.

- Mom, here's a check for room and board.

- Oh honey, that's not necessary.

- [Dennis] It is for me.

- Oh, I guess it is for me too.

- Andy, I gave Mom a check because I think it's right.

If you have a guilty conscience,

it wasn't from me. (laughs)

- Do you guys mind?

We have company.

- Mom, I'll give you money tomorrow.

- I never asked either of you for money.

- If he's paying, I'm paying.

I'm not gonna have Denny accuse me of freeloading.

- I didn't say anything about you.

- You guys are upsetting your mother.

- We're not upsetting her.

He has a chip on his shoulder.

- I have a chip on my shoulder?

- Yeah!

- Well you come strolling in here--

- Boys, watch this.

I don't want money from either of you.

Now, got it?

- Fine.

- Then I know what you must have felt like

when Mom had you meet us.

- [Dennis] And whose fault was that, Anne?

- [Anne] Don't start, Denny.

- Mary, what's the matter?

- I was just thinking.

My baby's gonna have these genes.

(laughing)

- [Anne] Now she thinks she's having Rosemary's baby.

- John, come here, look at this.

I'm losing my waistline. (laughs)

- No, Margaret, I'm tired of letting you manipulate me.

You're doing exactly what you want

in spite of what the doctor said.

Not to mention how I feel.

- But the baby and I are both fine.

Oh John, raising my family

was the biggest fulfillment of my life.

- Marrying you was the biggest fulfillment of my life.

- I didn't mean that as a slight.

I just meant that raising my kids

was something I'm really proud of.

- And they run rough shod all over you,

making your decisions for you,

and you'll let this child do the same.

What the hell is left for us?

I'm sorry, that wasn't fair.

Margaret,

honey, let's face facts.

You're a grandmother, and basically

you'll be this child's grandmother.

Is that fair?

- But John, we can give this child love

and a good home and education.

Do you think it's fair not

to welcome him into our lives?

- Not with the way you've forced it on us,

not with the risks that are there for you, for the child.

Not with what we had planned for our lives.

And there's no way we can even discuss anything

with your kids here all the time.

There's no time for us anymore.

- John.

What are you doing?

- I'm not a part of this.

- A part of what?

- A part of this decision, a part of this family.

I feel like a guest in a house

that was supposed to be ours.

Your kids, including this one,

have taken over our lives. - Where are you going?

- I don't know, someplace where I can think.

I can't do that here.

- Are you leaving?

- I don't count in any of this.

Why stay?

- Listen, you walk out that door,

you don't need to come back

until you're ready to accept both me and the baby.

(soft string music)

(engine igniting)

- Mom? - In the kitchen, Denny.

Hey.

- Why don't you let me call him for ya?

- I wasn't thinking of him.

- Ah, you've been thinking of him

for the past six weeks.

You'd feel better if you talked to him.

- I don't need to talk to John.

John needs to talk to me.

Now get out of here before I use this on you.

- Ah. - I mean it.

- Anne's right, you pregnant women are a menace. (laughs)

- You know it.

(tool clicking)

- I need a favor.

I, uh, sold my condo

and need to borrow your truck

so I can move out my personal stuff.

- You mean like, uh, the notched headboard

and your little black book, right?

- Nah, the headboard stays.

I sold the place furnished.

But I think if I get some help,

I could slide the little black book

into the back of your truck.

- Ah, I don't know.

This truck's a pain.

Breaks down a lot and I'm the only one who can fix it.

- Forget it.

I'll figure somethin' else out.

- Denny.

I'll take ya.

But I think I'm gonna have to take the shell off

to get the book in.

(rapid exhaling)

- Very good.

Everybody rest, take a break.

- How am I doin', coach?

- Oh, you're doing great.

Don't go by me, though.

You know, when I had you kids, they knocked me out.

Which isn't a bad idea.

This is a lotta work.

- Oh, it'll be worth it.

- I'm glad you asked me to be your coach.

- I was gonna ask Anne.

But I haven't seen her much lately.

- You're not complaining.

- No, I practically have the whole place to myself.

- (laughs) I know how that feels.

- Oh Mom, I don't like seeing you like this.

And I'm sure John is just as lonely

in that little apartment.

- I didn't throw him out, you know.

He left.

- I know.

I also know how hard it's gonna be for me.

My baby doesn't even have a father.

I'm terrified of every decision I make.

- I didn't have a partner for a lot of the time

you were growing up.

You came out okay.

- One outta four ain't bad.

- Right.

- But Mom, you have John.

And no offense, but if I had a husband,

I'd rather be lying in his lap

talking to him right now.

- Well, I would rather be talking to a husband too,

but that's just not the way it is.

It's just you and me, kid.

With our waddle walks and our weak bladders

and our craving for rocky road ice cream.

Uh-oh.

- Okay, everybody ready for some more breathing?

- Yeah, why not.

I haven't breathed this hard since my honeymoon.

(laughing)

- [Instructor] The hee hee ho ho's.

- Hee hee, ho ho. - Hee hee.

(forceful exhaling)

- [Margaret] Jersey's right, he will be your uncle.

And I promise to bring him to Florida next year

so you can babysit.

And I'll rest.

- You girls did pretty good here.

Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah.

Plates on the sink, girls.

(girls groan)

Mm-hm, then upstairs to finish

the rest of your homework.

(girls whine)

No, I got the dishes, Mom.

- Oh. - Go on.

(dishes clinking)

- When are you planning to go back to Florida?

- Uh, I think we're gonna wait

until you have your baby.

I wanna make sure you're okay

before I leave.

- Well, as far as I'm concerned,

you can stay as long as you like.

I love having you and the girls here.

- We're going to Canda.

- Canada?

- I'm taking the girls and going

where Judy can't find me.

- Oh, Andrew, that's crazy.

You can't put the girls through that.

- Look, Judy's husband has money.

Money talks.

I go back to Florida and let the courts decide this,

I'm gonna lose my family.

- But what kind of life would that be

for you and the girls, honey?

Always on the run, lookin' over your shoulder.

- What are you giving up to have your baby?

You're giving up your marriage,

you're giving up your husband.

- No, Andy, one has nothing to do with the other.

You know, if they catch you you'll end up in jail,

and the kids will end up with Judy.

- And if I go back, I lose everything right off.

I'm not giving up my girls.

- No, I'm not gonna let you do this.

- This is an announcement, not a discussion.

Now you go on.

I'll finish the dishes.

Go on.

I should never have told you.

You know, you really had an incredible place here, Denny.

Low score, Glen Willow Country Club, summer tournament.

Nice.

First place, Whispering Meadows Country Club,

business men's doubles.

You know, Mom really has to clear

some room on the mantle for these, don't you think?

(laughs)

(gentle instrumental music)

(splashing)

You want me to leave you alone?

- What I want is a party.

(laughing)

So I said to the guy, at least kiss me first!

Nah, nah, but really, I've had a lot of good job offers

and I have narrowed it down to one:

a major Wall Street firm opening offices back home.

And they're courting me.

Can't say anything more about it

till the first of the year, all right?

I'm really gonna miss you guys.

- [Guests] Aww.

- Now come on, come on, drink up.

This is a party, huh?

Got a full bar over there.

- I have to get up early in the morning

and I have a goodbye present I wanna give you.

- Oh really? - In private.

- Don't go away. - Oh.

- Hey, Andy.

I thought since we're both having a couple drinks and all,

we'll stay here tonight, all right?

You take the condo, I'll bunk at Joy's.

- Listen, I'm not staying here tonight.

I got kids I gotta get back home to.

- Andy, relax.

Come on, have another beer.

Have you talked to Kelly?

She thinks it's hip you paint boats in Florida.

- Hip?

Well, that's me.

I'm outta here.

- How am I gonna get home?

- Buy yourself a car.

I'm sure the big Wall Street firm will pay for it.

- Give me a break, these are my friends.

- Yeah, as long as you're gettin' 'em drunk.

Do you really think that Joy would take you home

if she saw you today?

Face reality, Mr. Country Club.

- Like you?

Running to Canada? - Ohh.

- You run away from every problem you've ever had.

- Oh, and you're an expert on problems.

You won't even admit that you have any.

- [Dennis] Clean out your own house

before you make judgements on mine.

- Hey.

Hey, you ready to sneak out?

- Bet on it.

Nice meeting everybody.

- Family problems.

(door slams)

- [Nick] I demand you call me the sex god.

(squealing) (laughing)

- Okay, I'll admit you're,

you're okay.

- Okay?

The sex god demands to hear he is wonderful.

(shrieking)

- No! (laughing)

Okay, okay, okay!

You're the sex god. - Yeah!

- [Anne] But the sex god is just okay.

(shrieking)

- Anne!

Anne.

Oh.

Were you two, uh--

- No, no. - No, no, no.

- Sorry.

What did you do with my lotion?

- I never touched your lotion.

- It's not where I keep it.

(muttering)

- Oh, now come here, sex god.

You're gonna have to do it again

until you get it absolutely right.

- I'm a very slow learner.

(moaning)

- I found it!

You did move it.

It was with your hairspray.

You don't wanna hear this now, do you?

- Mm, no, no, I can live without hearing.

(Nick chuckles)

- [Mary] She just takes over, moves my lotion.

What is next?

- Mm, this is nuts. (laughs)

This is nuts.

Oh.

The closer the baby gets,

the crazier she gets about everything.

Oh.

After Thanksgiving, she's not going back to work.

She's gonna turn herself into a basket case.

- Well, what do you think it's gonna be like

once she has the baby?

- I try not to think about that.

- Well think about, think about movin' in with me.

- Yeah, yeah right, right.

Get real.

- I'm serious.

- I'm finally divorced from number two.

I don't wanna jump that fast.

- I'm not asking you to marry me, Anne.

But I know how I feel about you.

- Well, let me think about it.

- Oh, look at this one!

Oh, oh John, thank you so much

for coming with me, because I couldn't carry

that baby swing all alone.

- That's, that's okay.

Can we just get the baby swing and go?

I've got a lotta work to catch up on this afternoon.

- Okay, just one more minute.

Oh, look at this one!

They are both so pretty, the colors.

I don't know which one I want.

Which one do you think?

- Can we just get the baby swing?

- Yes, the baby swing.

That is what we came to the mall for.

But I--

- Margaret. - John.

Oh.

This is making us feel very foolish.

- Mom, that's the way you've been acting.

I love you both.

- It's not your color.

I just thought when you saw how happy

this made me, you'd get swallowed up in it.

It was stupid.

- No, your joy has always had that effect on me.

It's one of the reasons I fell in love with you.

But I wasn't ready to dump all our plans

and dreams and have this thrust on me.

I think we need to know each other

as husband and wife before we know each other

as daddy and mommy.

And as much as I love you,

I couldn't let you manipulate me like that.

- Manipulate you? - Yes.

- I never intended to manipulate you--

- I know you didn't, I know.

You've just gotten so good at it,

you don't even realize you're doing it.

But this was serious, and it hurt.

- Well, I am sorry.

I don't want to hurt--

- Look, you ignored how I felt about being a father.

Honey, I don't know how to be a father.

My dad died when I was a kid.

- I know he did, but that--

- He worked himself into a heart attack at 40

and I never even knew the man.

- You're not your father.

- Look, I don't know what I'd be like as a father

and I don't wanna find out.

I love you.

(somber instrumental music)

- All right.

The word is division.

Let's see what you have here.

How many times does six go into nine.

(doorbell rings) - I'll get it.

- Once. - Right.

So put the one up there.

Now, the next one is another six.

So put the six behind the three.

- [Judy] Hi Amy.

Your hair is so curly!

It looks just like mine.

- What are you doing here?

- Andrew.

Hi, Jersey.

It's me, Mommy.

- Andrew, who's that at the...

Judy.

- Hi Margaret.

Look at you.

- Happens to the best of us.

Amy, Jersey, I think you girls

better go upstairs.

- Margaret, I would like to see my children, please.

- Well that's just tough. - Andrew.

Dennis, would you take the girls upstairs?

I'll be right along. - No, wait.

- Oh, yeah, uh, Amy, Jersey,

let's go play video games, all right?

- No, no, I'll take them up.

My girls will be with me.

Come on.

Come on, sweetie.

- Read this.

Talk some sense into your son.

It's a court order.

It says that I can see my daughters.

And I get them on Thanksgiving.

Make sure he knows that.

- Oh, I'll tell him everything.

But for now I think you better leave.

- Come on, honey.

Let's go.

- (laughs) These old pictures are just what I needed.

Oh, look here.

There you are with that little neighbor kid.

What was his name?

- Willy Daily.

- You know, I never said this before

but that was the ugliest child.

- Mother! - He was.

Look at him, bug eyes, a little squashed up face.

Looks like ET.

(laughing)

- I wonder what my baby's gonna look like.

I'll know in two months.

- And I'll know in four months.

Long as he doesn't look like little Willy.

- Oh, it won't matter.

You're gonna think he's beautiful.

- He will be, if he looks like John.

He's kicking.

Feel this, feel.

Can you feel that, huh?

- Yes!

(laughing)

Wow.

By the way, John told me

that my job would be waiting for me

after my maternity leave.

- Oh.

- So to thank him, I invited him

for Thanksgiving dinner.

Mom, he didn't have anywhere to go.

He didn't have any plans.

I didn't want him to be alone.

We are his family.

- You're getting awfully sly about things.

- I learned from the best.

- Well, just don't pick up

too many of my bad habits.

Getting what you want isn't so important

as hanging on to what you have.

- Like John?

- Actually, I was thinking about your father.

There was a man who really needed a lot of attention,

and my focus was always on you kids.

- Mother, he didn't need any attention.

He got that from every woman in every bar.

That wasn't your fault.

I'm just grateful you were there for us.

I'm glad you're here now,

'cause I don't feel so all alone going through all this.

- I'm having a baby the same time as my daughter.

This is crazy!

(laughing)

(door bangs)

- Well, this looks cozy.

Or did you both just topple over?

- Oh, you'd be amazed how fast I can get

off this floor and come after you.

(laughing)

- Don't bother.

I'd still beat you to the rocky road.

- Chocolate sauce on mine.

- Chocolate sauce on mine. (laughs)

(door bangs)

- There we go.

- Do we have to go, Daddy?

- Yeah, I'm afraid so, sweetie.

- Why can't we stay here and have Thanksgiving

with you and Grandma?

- Look, it's just for one day, all right?

I'm sure Mommy's gonna take you someplace real nice.

You have fun, and be good, okay?

All right, come on.

- You two look so beautiful.

Oh, hi baby.

Hey, I bought you some new clothes.

I think you're really gonna like 'em.

- It's all right.

Now you go with your mother, go on.

And you make sure you get some turkey, all right?

- They'll get dinner, don't worry.

We have a very special day planned.

We're gonna go downtown and we're gonna see a parade.

Ready?

- Judy says the girls always loved horses.

If you don't mind, I'd like to get 'em one.

- [Andrew] We need to talk.

- This isn't a very good time.

- This is the only time.

I want 'em back by nine.

- I would like to keep them overnight.

- No, not tonight, it's not good.

- I'm their mother.

I know that I made some mistakes,

but I really love them.

- You walked out on me.

I can't begin to tell you how that devastated them.

The nights they cried in bed.

I promise you, you'll never get them from me.

- That's up to the court to decide.

- You will never get their love.

I don't think they'll ever forgive you.

- We better go if we're gonna make the parade.

- Nine o'clock.

(somber instrumental music)

(engine igniting)

- Hi Andrew.

Happy Thanksgiving.

- You too, John.

- Hi.

- Hi.

I wasn't sure if you were really gonna make it or not.

- Look, if this is uncomfortable, I can go.

- Oh no, no, I don't want you to go.

As long as you don't say anything

about how big I'm getting.

- Happy Thanksgiving.

- Well, happy Thanksgiving to you, too.

- Uh, we could throw some Crisco on the floor.

You guys could sumo wrestle.

- Or we could throw you on the floor and sit on you.

- (laughs) No, please.

Why don't you breeding women go sit somewhere?

Nick and I will clean up.

- Oh, I was gonna go watch football with your brothers.

- Yeah? - Well, I'm gonna go lie down.

- (laughs) Okay.

Hey, march.

- Hi.

Thanks.

Dinner was great.

- It was a family effort.

- It's good to eat a home cooked meal.

I've been eating out a lot.

- John, you know I love you.

- I love you too.

You're all I think about.

- I really should have listened to you

when this first started.

But, I wanted to give you a baby

and I wanted you to want it.

I can't give you the kind of marriage you want.

- Then where does that leave us?

(soft instrumental music)

- Tell me you're happy I'm having the baby.

- I can't do that.

- Then, I think

we should file for a legal separation and then a divorce.

- I don't want a divorce.

I love you.

- I love you too, John, but,

this baby's coming.

We can't have it both ways.

I don't want to bring a baby into a situation

where there are doubts and resentments.

(door bangs)

(cheerful Christmas music)

(bell ringing)

- Ho, ho, ho, merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas to everyone.

(customers chattering)

- Excuse me, I'm lookin' for Mr. Lanely.

- Dennis Becker, it is you.

Think back, Regis High School.

- Carey?

Carely Lanely. - Right.

I think you're looking for me.

- Oh, the head hunter just said Lanely.

I assumed it was a man.

So, you work here?

- I'm the Midwest manager for this company.

This store's had some problems

so I'm here straightening things out

trying to find a store manager.

- Well, I told the agency I was lookin'

for a managerial position.

This isn't exactly what I had in mind.

- They have a tendency to exaggerate.

What were you doing before?

- Stock broker in Chicago.

But I'm back now, lookin' around.

- How's it going?

- I've had some interesting offers.

Won't know until after the holidays.

- I could use someone like you here

to manage this store.

- What do you mean?

- I remember you were class president,

smart, very organized, good with people.

You were prom king.

I always wondered what happened to the prom king.

Well, if you're still looking after the holidays,

it's $24,000 a year plus commissions and bonuses.

- Well thanks, but, um, I was makin'

a lot more than that.

Have a lifestyle to maintain, you know?

But why don't you and I get together

for a drink sometime?

- Dennis, this is business.

I don't wanna go out with you.

- Well, I seem to remember that you and I...

(sighs) Listen, I'm sorry.

I appreciate the job offer.

Happy holidays.

- No, no, no, don't even think of moving

back in with Mom.

- Anne, you're moving in with Nick.

I can't afford this place by myself,

especially with a baby.

- Well, I'll, I'll pay my half.

You just wait.

Wait till Mom's had her baby.

You don't want your kid driving her crazy

during her last two months.

- My baby's not gonna drive her crazy.

- Mary, what am I gonna do when this falls apart?

- What are you talking about?

- Well, look at our family.

Mom's filing for divorce from John.

That's her second.

Get that, get that off.

I've been divorced twice, Dennis once.

Andy, Andy never even got married.

And you.

No, no, we have a relationship curse.

So I'm movin' in with Nick?

- Anne, don't jinx it.

You and Nick are just starting off.

- You see, I don't have to jinx it.

It'll just screw up by itself.

- If you're that afraid, don't move in with him.

- I wish he never asked me.

- Hey Andrew.

- How ya doin'?

- Is your mom in?

- No, she took the girls and went shopping.

- Uh, listen, could you do me a favor?

Could you,

could you give these to your mom

and wish her a merry Christmas for me?

- [Andrew] Yeah.

- You think what I did was wrong, don't you?

- Leavin' my mom?

Yeah.

- It wasn't my choice.

- And so now you're gonna get divorced

after seven and a half months.

You know, eight years ago

I was in exactly the same place you are now.

Judy was pregnant with Jersey.

I didn't want a kid.

We were gonna sail across the Atlantic

and hitch hike through Europe.

I wanted to be free to experience the world.

But you know what?

I got it.

I got it through my daughters.

It may not have been Europe,

but I discovered the world

in everything they saw for the first time.

Look, I know that this baby was not in your plans.

But we all make plans in life.

I mean, how often do they work out?

- It's not just the plans.

It wasn't my choice.

It was your mom's, so is the divorce.

- I know.

But you're this baby's father

whether you wanna be or not.

Just like Judy is my girls' mother

whether I like it or not.

Why don't you give these to her, huh?

Hm?

(soft piano music)

(ball thumping)

(cheerful Christmas music)

- Would you lighten up please?

We're only gonna stay for a few minutes.

We've been at your office Christmas party

all night long.

I should at least make an appearance at mine.

- Let's just get this over with.

I'm tired.

A court room Christmas party.

It's nice to see my tax dollars at work.

- Hey look, Captain Leeman's playing Santa tonight

and he looks pretty smashed,

so stay cool, okay?

- Hey Nick!

Come here.

Merry Christmas - Merry Christmas.

- Who did you bring tonight?

Oh, ho, ho. - Ho, ho, ho.

- Why don't you come over here

and sit on Santa's lap and tell him

what you want for Christmas.

- Be cool, he's my boss.

- What are you, an elf?

Shouldn't Santa sober up?

I'd hate to see him fly into the engine

of a 747 and kill poor Rudolph.

(laughing)

Santa's not flying tonight,

but he does know where there's some mistletoe.

- Oh, no, no, sir, I don't think

that's such a good idea.

- I can take care of myself.

- I know you, Anne.

I know what's comin', and so do you.

- If you're afraid of the way I act, don't bring me.

- Is that what this is about?

You're gonna prove to me we shouldn't have come?

- Forget Officer Lundgren.

I'll put on some music and we can dance.

- We are fighting here.

Do you mind?

Look, Nick, this is the way I am.

If you don't like it, fine.

But I won't have you telling me how to behave.

- Why do you keep trying to sabotage my feelings for you?

I am sick of it.

- You're sick of it?

You don't know anything about it.

- Oh, I know when things start gettin' serious,

you do a damn good job of destroying them.

I won't stay here and hold you up

while you keep chopping me off at the knees.

- I don't need you.

- Well you need someone.

Do yourself a favor, see a counselor.

You need a professional.

I can't help you.

- You pay your own rent.

I'm out.

(somber instrumental music)

(sobbing)

- [Amy] Look at this new coat, daddy!

- Ooh, isn't that nice?

- I like that.

- It's lined.

- Lined.

Ooh, a hat, too.

- Andrew, this could be the last holiday

you spend with us.

You might try to enjoy it a little bit.

- Mom, this is the first time in 10 years

I've spent Christmas with the family.

It's hardly a tradition.

Mm.

- Jersey, please don't take pictures of us

when we're not smiling.

- But Grandma, nobody's smiling.

- Did you spend all the money you made

this year on presents?

As soon as I get my escrow check,

I'll get ya'll whatever you want.

- Oh Denny, the presents don't really matter.

(laughs)

Oh, my feet hurt, my legs hurt,

my back hurts.

I wish this kid would just pop on out.

I don't care how much crying it does.

I can't take much more of this.

- Tell me about it.

- Here, Uncle Dennis, this is for you.

- From you?

- The girls.

It comes with instructions.

- Thank you.

- This is for you.

- It's probably a lump of coal from Santa.

- Nuh-uh, he hasn't come yet.

It's from Officer Nick.

- Nick?

- [Andrew] He stopped by today, dropped it off.

- Hope it doesn't explode.

- [Mary] Oh, how sweet.

- [Andrew] That is very nice.

(cheerful Christmas music)

- Oh, I wish I had a man to give me gifts.

- You have Santa.

He's a guy.

- That's right, Santa loves me.

Hey, you guys wanna go to midnight mass together?

- Yeah! - Oh, Mary.

No, no, their kids.

- Well, they can sleep in tomorrow.

- Oh, with Santa coming tonight?

I don't think so.

- I don't wanna go either.

Dinner made me feel just awful.

Besides, John's lectoring tonight

and I don't think he really wants to see me.

- I don't think God wants to see me.

I haven't been in church in a very long time.

- Well now is always the best time to make a change.

Come on, Denny.

- Uh-uh.

- No.

- What does a pregnant lady have to do,

kick and scream?

We should go to church as a family.

It is what Christmas is all about.

Now, damn it, we're going to church!

♪ Come and behold him ♪

♪ Born the king of angels ♪

♪ Oh come let us adore him ♪

♪ Oh come let us adore him ♪

♪ Oh come let us adore him ♪

♪ Christ the Lord ♪

- Merry Christmas. - Merry Christmas.

- Um, let's all greet Father Kelly

while the choir sings hymn number 37, Joy to the World.

Would you all please rise?

("Joy to the World")

♪ Joy to the world the Lord is come ♪

♪ Let earth receive her king ♪

♪ Let every heart prepare him room ♪

♪ And heaven and nature sing ♪

- Oh my god!

I think I'm going into labor.

- Oh, this is great.

All we're missing is the manger.

- Okay, okay, we have to get her to the hospital.

She's having the baby.

Excuse me, please. - Mom, move!

Move, move.

- Excuse us, please, we have to get out.

- Just get out here, Mom.

(speech drowned out by singing)

♪ The Lord is come ♪

♪ Let earth receive her king ♪

- Hurry! - She's having a baby.

- [Mary] Hurry!

Mom.

- Miracles of Christmas, right?

- Go, go, go!

- Okay, okay, count your breaths, count your breaths.

Oh, hee hee, ho ho.

- Ow!

Oh.

- Would you excuse me? - Watch your step.

(Margaret shrieks)

- Mom!

- Dear, I think mine's going to come too.

(shrieks) John!

John!

- Mom's having her baby too! - What?

- John!

- Margaret.

- [Woman] They're having twins!

- Andrew, let's get the car.

- I think, I think the baby's coming early.

- Mom, Mom, breathe. - I'll be right back.

- Hee hee, ho ho.

- [Both] Hee hee, ho ho.

Hee hee, ho ho.

Hee hee, ho ho.

Hee hee, ho ho.

♪ And nature sing ♪

- The doctors will be there when we get to the hospital

and I called the police.

- Where is the car?

What did they do, decide to go get a pizza?

- Just calm down, now.

Just keep calm, keep calm.

Oh, oh, oh, oh!

Where the hell are they?

- We can't wait.

I'm gonna get my car.

You take care of them? - Sure.

- Okay girls, let's go.

Come on, put your coats on.

- Breathe, Mom, breathe.

- Ho ho, hee hee.

- [All] Ho ho, hee hee, ho ho.

- [Anne] Hee hee, ho ho.

Mom, hey!

Mom!

Mom!

Hee ho, hee ho ho.

Hee ho!

Ho!

Ho ho hee ho ho.

Two women in labor, no time.

Saint John's, pronto!

- [Officer] Saint John's, hurry!

(siren wailing)

(brakes screech)

- [Dennis] If I'da known you were gonna park

in the next state.

- [Andrew] I could've gotten a closer spot

if you hadn't taken so long gettin' ready.

- We're back, let's roll.

Where the hell are they?

- They probably already had the babies

and they're in here having a christening.

- Cute.

- [Both] Mom?

- [Crowd] Shhh!

♪ Sleep in heavenly peace ♪

- [Both] Hee hee, ho ho, hee hee, ho ho.

Hee hee, ho ho.

- Oh!

Oh, hee, ho.

Have a good delivery, dear.

- You too, Mom!

Anne, don't leave me.

I need a lamaze partner.

- Wait, I don't, I don't know what to do.

Nurse, would you take these kids?

- Sure.

Come on, kids.

(beeping)

- Relax, Margaret.

What we're gonna do is stop the contractions.

- Oh yes, I'd like that a lot.

Oh. - Water broke.

Contractions are coming faster.

- Okay.

Margaret, I think this baby wants his Christmas presents.

- Ooh, I didn't buy him anything.

- Look, John, go out and get changed

into the scrubs.

Pam will show you where to go.

- Scrubs, right.

I'll be right back.

You just stay here and keep breathing.

- Where does he think I'd go?

(Mary groaning)

- Okay, Mary, push! - Come on, come on!

- Pain!

God, this hurts, it hurts!

Pain, pain, pain, pain!

(Mary panting)

- Can't you see she's in pain?

You gotta, you gotta give her an epidural or--

- Shut up, Anne, or I will hurt you!

- Okay, okay, you just, you keep pushing, okay?

Can you, like, reach in and pull the baby out?

Mary's gettin' testy.

- Okay, get ready, Mary.

Okay, all right, all right.

Okay, come on now.

Push!

(Mary groaning)

- Oh god! - Breathe, breathe.

Breathe, breathe, breathe, breathe.

Okay, push!

(energetic music)

- That's it, you're doing fine.

Now when John gets back, you just--

(beeping) - What was that?

- Doctor, baby's heart rate dropped to the low 70s.

- We need an emergency C-section.

Now Margaret, I need you to roll over

to the other side.

Now that's it, darling, that's the way.

Okay, good.

All right everyone, let's go, STAT.

- Listen, have I got all this,

what's the matter? - Change of plans.

Everything's gonna be fine.

Now let's move.

- No, I'm sorry, you can't go with us.

(soft instrumental music)

- Push, push! - Oh god!

- Is it there? - The baby's coming.

Okay, stop pushing, stop pushing, stop pushing.

Just relax, relax.

You're breathing, you're breathing.

You're doing fine, doing fine.

Okay, Mary, on the next contraction

we're gonna deliver the baby.

Get ready, honey, get ready.

Okay.

Okay, come on now.

Give me a push!

(Mary groaning)

(shrieking)

- Oh god, Mary!

Mary!

- [Doctor] Okay.

You have a daughter.

- Oh god!

(baby crying)

You have a daughter!

(laughing)

Look at her!

- Thanks for the sweats.

And basketball.

- Girls picked 'em out.

- I know what I'm gettin' you for Christmas.

- I got everything I need.

- Well, you're gonna need money to start over up north.

When I get my money out of my condo,

whatever you need, it's yours.

- You're gonna need money until you land a job.

- I got a job.

I'm, uh, gonna manage a jewelry store.

(clears throat) In the mall.

- A jewelry store.

- Yeah.

So.

Whatever you need money for.

- How about a good lawyer?

- You're going back to Florida?

- Mom's right.

I can't have my daughters

looking over their shoulders for the rest of their lives.

It's not fair.

Judy is their mother.

They should know her.

- Andy.

We've,

we've never really been friends.

- We are very different people.

- You think so? - Yeah.

- The more I get to know you,

the more I, I think we're a lot alike.

- I know we haven't always gotten along.

But I have always felt

that if I ever got in a real jam,

that you would be one of the people

that I would call.

- I'd be there.

- I know.

(gentle guitar music)

Merry Christmas.

- Merry Christmas, Andy.

- Baby?

Is he gonna be all right?

- Yeah, he's being monitored for respiratory problems,

but that's normal with a baby

born seven weeks early.

Dr. Chang says he's gonna be fine.

- I'm so glad you were here.

- So am I, or you would have had him

in the back of the church.

- But,

you know, John, I was just so happy

about the baby.

But I never intended him to come between us.

Especially in the way I did it.

I'm really sorry I hurt you like that.

- We've gotten off to a pretty lousy start

in this marriage.

I don't want a divorce.

- Do you mean--

- He's my son.

I wanna be his father.

I am his father.

I want us to be a family,

and I'm gonna do the best job I can.

Now, I'm gonna go get the family

and take them up to meet Robert Dennis Andrew Hix.

- I like that.

Oh, John!

(John laughing)

(knocking)

- This is the right place. - Come see our new cousin!

- Let me see my new, nephew?

- Niece. - Nice!

- What do you think?

- She's gorgeous.

- Can we hold her?

- Maybe in a couple of days.

I don't think Mary's quite ready

to give her up just yet.

- Officer Nick. - Hey.

- I heard the call.

I figured, how many mother daughter deliveries

could there be?

(laughing)

How is everybody?

- Look at my daughter.

- Wow.

She is beautiful.

Congratulations.

How's your mom?

- We're still waitin' to hear.

- Well, I better go.

I'm on duty.

Merry Christmas.

- Yeah, Merry Christmas. - Merry Christmas.

(baby whimpering)

- You're a great guy, Nick.

You can do a lot better than me.

- Why, Anne?

What did I do?

- You made me fall in love.

(gentle instrumental music)

Every guy I ever loved hurt me.

- If you want someone who's gonna hurt you,

find another guy.

I love you, Anne.

I could never hurt you.

But I won't let you hurt me.

- I'm sorry.

- You gotta stop believing

that it's all gonna fall apart if you invest yourself,

or all you'll ever be in your life is alone.

I'm not the other men you've fallen in love with.

I'm the guy that can break the curse.

- Hi.

- Hi there.

- Found all these people wandering the halls.

- Look what I've got! - Oh, come here!

Come.

- [Mary] Say hello to your newest granddaughter,

Margaret Anne.

- Margaret Anne.

Oh, she's perfect!

Oh, she's perfect.

- [Andrew] The girls wanna know if they can--

- You can't all be in here.

- Don't worry, we'll only be a minute.

We're all family.

- Oh, would you mind?

We'd like to capture this moment.

- All right, well, get in a little closer there.

Say baby!

- [All] Baby!

(laughing)

(sentimental instrumental music)

(MultiCom Jingle)