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Doctor is a prestigious occupation...
3
00:00:05,138 --> 00:00:06,867
...but it's one of the only jobs...
4
00:00:07,040 --> 00:00:10,009
...where you have to have your
diploma right up there on the wall.
5
00:00:10,176 --> 00:00:12,235
lt makes them seem
so insecure, doesn't it?
6
00:00:12,412 --> 00:00:15,142
''l really am a doctor, you know.
7
00:00:15,882 --> 00:00:18,510
lf you think l'm not,
just check it out.''
8
00:00:19,819 --> 00:00:21,878
l don't know why they need
these little bits...
9
00:00:22,055 --> 00:00:23,682
...of psychological
leverage over us.
10
00:00:23,857 --> 00:00:26,417
''Go in that room, take your pants off,
wait 1 5 minutes...
11
00:00:26,593 --> 00:00:29,255
...then l'll give you my opinion.''
12
00:00:29,963 --> 00:00:31,794
After that, anybody with pants on...
13
00:00:31,965 --> 00:00:34,229
...seems like they know
what they're talking about.
14
00:00:34,401 --> 00:00:38,360
ln any difference of opinion,
pants always beats no pants.
15
00:00:44,477 --> 00:00:46,502
Can l say one word to you?
16
00:00:46,679 --> 00:00:48,169
Lobster.
17
00:00:48,348 --> 00:00:50,179
The lobster here is unbelievable.
18
00:00:52,786 --> 00:00:54,651
A little expensive.
19
00:00:55,121 --> 00:00:58,056
-Twenty-five dollars.
-Yes, well, you know...
20
00:00:58,224 --> 00:01:00,419
...l'm not thinking about the price.
21
00:01:00,593 --> 00:01:03,824
You know, you're the only woman
l've never thought about the price.
22
00:01:03,997 --> 00:01:05,658
Get the lobster. l beg you to get it.
23
00:01:05,832 --> 00:01:08,357
-Go for it. Go for the lobster.
-George....
24
00:01:08,535 --> 00:01:10,162
George...
25
00:01:10,336 --> 00:01:12,463
...l think we have to talk.
26
00:01:12,639 --> 00:01:14,539
l think we have a problem.
27
00:01:15,341 --> 00:01:16,740
We do?
28
00:01:17,811 --> 00:01:19,745
We can't keep seeing each other.
29
00:01:20,780 --> 00:01:22,407
Why?
30
00:01:22,949 --> 00:01:26,077
Because it's over.
31
00:01:27,620 --> 00:01:30,111
lt's my parents, George.
32
00:01:30,290 --> 00:01:32,850
The differences in our religion....
33
00:01:34,461 --> 00:01:36,053
George...
34
00:01:36,229 --> 00:01:38,993
...can you ever forgive me?
35
00:01:39,766 --> 00:01:41,961
Have you decided yet?
36
00:01:42,502 --> 00:01:45,630
Yes. l'll have the lobster.
37
00:01:50,210 --> 00:01:54,704
You know, l'm starting to think that
maybe lobster isn't the way to go.
38
00:01:56,950 --> 00:02:00,215
-What? He asked you out?
-We started to talk, l told him l jog...
39
00:02:00,386 --> 00:02:03,514
-...and he put his hand on my heart.
-On your heart?
40
00:02:03,790 --> 00:02:07,123
-Jerry, the man is a doctor.
-Doctor. He's a podiatrist.
41
00:02:07,293 --> 00:02:08,783
So? Same thing.
42
00:02:08,962 --> 00:02:12,261
Anyone can get into podiatry school.
George got into podiatry school.
43
00:02:12,532 --> 00:02:14,295
-Really?
-Sure.
44
00:02:14,834 --> 00:02:16,961
-Hello.
-Oh, hi.
45
00:02:17,337 --> 00:02:20,067
-Are you gonna be stopping by later?
-Yes, l'll be stopping.
46
00:02:20,240 --> 00:02:23,073
-Okay. l'll see you later.
-See you later.
47
00:02:24,644 --> 00:02:26,908
Well, we can't all be
dating podiatrists.
48
00:02:32,485 --> 00:02:35,318
-lt's over.
-What?
49
00:02:35,488 --> 00:02:37,922
-How'd you get in?
-Kramer.
50
00:02:38,091 --> 00:02:40,559
-What's that?
-Lobster.
51
00:02:42,695 --> 00:02:44,993
Looks like a swan.
52
00:02:45,565 --> 00:02:48,557
-She says we can't go out anymore.
-Why?
53
00:02:48,735 --> 00:02:51,169
Because l'm not Latvian Orthodox.
54
00:02:52,138 --> 00:02:55,938
Her parents won't let her date
anyone who isn't Latvian Orthodox!
55
00:02:56,276 --> 00:02:58,710
Latvian Orthodox?
56
00:02:58,878 --> 00:03:00,641
lt is lobster.
57
00:03:00,813 --> 00:03:03,611
She's limiting herself
to Latvian Orthodox?
58
00:03:03,783 --> 00:03:06,217
-That's too bad.
-l know.
59
00:03:06,419 --> 00:03:09,217
This was the only woman
l never lied to.
60
00:03:09,389 --> 00:03:11,550
Well, that's not entirely true.
61
00:03:11,724 --> 00:03:13,282
Oh, whatever.
62
00:03:14,427 --> 00:03:17,021
-This is delicious.
-Succulent.
63
00:03:18,665 --> 00:03:21,793
She knew l didn't have a job.
She knew l lived at home.
64
00:03:21,968 --> 00:03:24,095
Didn't seem to bother her.
65
00:03:24,270 --> 00:03:26,534
l think l could have married
this woman.
66
00:03:26,739 --> 00:03:28,570
Why don't you just ask her parents?
67
00:03:28,775 --> 00:03:31,903
l can't. l met them. They're devout.
68
00:03:32,078 --> 00:03:35,479
You know, in the cab
on the way over here, l....
69
00:03:35,648 --> 00:03:38,310
l actually thought about converting.
70
00:03:39,118 --> 00:03:42,918
-To Latvian Orthodox?
-Why not? What do l care?
71
00:03:45,091 --> 00:03:47,787
You know, it's not like
changing toothpaste.
72
00:03:48,027 --> 00:03:50,291
l think it would be romantic.
73
00:03:51,631 --> 00:03:54,623
-Really?
-Yeah. lt's like Edward Vlll...
74
00:03:54,834 --> 00:03:58,531
...abdicating the throne
to marry Mrs. Simpson.
75
00:03:59,606 --> 00:04:01,233
Like King Edward.
76
00:04:02,108 --> 00:04:04,872
-Like King Edward, Jerry.
-Yeah, well...
77
00:04:05,044 --> 00:04:09,105
...King Edward didn't live in Queens
with Frank and Estelle Costanza.
78
00:04:09,849 --> 00:04:12,181
You know what?
l could probably do this.
79
00:04:12,352 --> 00:04:15,014
-What's the difference?
-George, l was just kidding around.
80
00:04:15,188 --> 00:04:17,554
l wouldn't even tell her.
l could surprise her.
81
00:04:17,724 --> 00:04:20,921
-George, l wasn't serious.
-How hard could it be?
82
00:04:21,094 --> 00:04:24,461
You make a little contribution,
you have a ceremony.
83
00:04:25,098 --> 00:04:27,259
l am gonna think about this.
84
00:04:27,433 --> 00:04:30,596
l am really gonna think about this.
85
00:04:32,171 --> 00:04:35,106
-l guess this one is my fault.
-Oh, yeah.
86
00:04:42,015 --> 00:04:45,416
That was nice. Have you always
been such a good kisser?
87
00:04:46,786 --> 00:04:48,879
l don't know. Not always.
88
00:04:49,055 --> 00:04:50,386
No?
89
00:04:50,556 --> 00:04:53,389
No, l.... l had to work at it.
90
00:04:53,626 --> 00:04:57,357
As a kid, while kids were out playing,
l'd be in my room practicing kissing.
91
00:04:58,364 --> 00:05:00,093
lt was worth it.
92
00:05:01,100 --> 00:05:04,228
l'll be right back.
93
00:05:08,341 --> 00:05:10,673
-Where are you going?
-To wash my hands.
94
00:05:10,843 --> 00:05:13,607
-They're sticky from the orange.
-Meet you back here?
95
00:05:13,780 --> 00:05:15,975
-Right there.
-Okay.
96
00:05:37,070 --> 00:05:39,038
Fungicide?
97
00:05:39,639 --> 00:05:41,300
Fungus?
98
00:05:44,577 --> 00:05:46,306
Fungicide.
99
00:05:48,381 --> 00:05:50,474
-l mean, what could she have?
-l don't know.
100
00:05:50,650 --> 00:05:52,948
-Fungus.
-Exactly.
101
00:05:54,387 --> 00:05:57,151
-So, what'd you say?
-l said l was coming down...
102
00:05:57,323 --> 00:05:59,348
...with the flu and l had to go home.
103
00:05:59,525 --> 00:06:01,993
What were you doing
opening her medicine cabinet?
104
00:06:02,161 --> 00:06:07,030
l didn't open it. lt was open.
l just nudged it a little.
105
00:06:07,433 --> 00:06:09,993
-You were snooping.
-l was not snooping.
106
00:06:10,236 --> 00:06:13,069
l did not break the seal.
There was no breaking and entering.
107
00:06:13,239 --> 00:06:15,298
-l wouldn't do that.
-l would.
108
00:06:16,809 --> 00:06:18,640
l always open medicine cabinets.
109
00:06:18,978 --> 00:06:21,879
Well, l trust people not to do that.
110
00:06:22,048 --> 00:06:23,743
Big mistake.
111
00:06:26,119 --> 00:06:28,587
Why don't you ask
that doctor what it is.
112
00:06:28,755 --> 00:06:31,815
Now he's a doctor?
Before he was a podiatrist.
113
00:06:32,058 --> 00:06:35,516
But that's what podiatrists do.
They deal in fungus.
114
00:06:35,695 --> 00:06:39,256
They're knee-deep in fungus.
This guy knows fungus.
115
00:06:39,632 --> 00:06:42,499
l am not going to ask him
about funguses.
116
00:06:42,869 --> 00:06:44,393
Fungi.
117
00:06:46,139 --> 00:06:49,233
-What?
-Fungi.
118
00:06:54,447 --> 00:06:59,009
Why do you want to accept
the Latvian Orthodox faith?
119
00:07:01,421 --> 00:07:05,687
ln this age of uncertainty
and confusion...
120
00:07:07,093 --> 00:07:11,393
...a man begins to ask himself
certain questions.
121
00:07:12,198 --> 00:07:16,498
How can one even begin
to put into words something so....
122
00:07:16,803 --> 00:07:18,668
Enigmatic?
123
00:07:19,205 --> 00:07:21,935
-Vast?
-No, not vast.
124
00:07:22,675 --> 00:07:26,372
Well, whatever it is,
basically you like the religion.
125
00:07:26,679 --> 00:07:29,239
-Yes.
-ls there one aspect of the faith...
126
00:07:29,415 --> 00:07:31,713
...you find particularly attractive?
127
00:07:34,020 --> 00:07:36,045
l think the hats.
128
00:07:39,559 --> 00:07:43,825
The hat conveys that solemn
religious look you want in a faith.
129
00:07:44,363 --> 00:07:45,489
Very pious.
130
00:07:46,065 --> 00:07:49,660
Are you familiar
with Orthodox theology?
131
00:07:50,703 --> 00:07:55,800
Well, perhaps not to the extent
that you are, but....
132
00:07:56,709 --> 00:07:58,973
But l know the basic plot, yeah.
133
00:08:00,012 --> 00:08:02,742
-Plot?
-Yes, you know, the flood...
134
00:08:02,915 --> 00:08:06,351
...and the lepers
and the commandments and all that.
135
00:08:06,519 --> 00:08:09,784
Well, it's obvious
you are sincere in your desire.
136
00:08:10,156 --> 00:08:13,990
Oh, yes, l am, Father.
lncredibly sincere.
137
00:08:14,160 --> 00:08:15,684
So...
138
00:08:15,862 --> 00:08:17,523
...am l in?
139
00:08:19,131 --> 00:08:22,692
The first step would be
to familiarize yourself...
140
00:08:22,869 --> 00:08:25,702
...with these texts.
141
00:08:27,974 --> 00:08:32,172
You see, Father, l'm incredibly
anxious to become a member.
142
00:08:32,845 --> 00:08:36,042
Don't you offer any kind
of an express conversion?
143
00:08:36,215 --> 00:08:37,944
A quick change?
144
00:08:38,417 --> 00:08:39,509
Yes?
145
00:08:40,453 --> 00:08:43,980
Oh, l'm sorry. Father, there's a man
waiting in the chapel.
146
00:08:44,156 --> 00:08:46,351
Well, you may attend to it, Sister.
147
00:08:46,592 --> 00:08:51,495
This is George Costanza.
He is interested in joining the Church.
148
00:08:51,898 --> 00:08:54,230
Are you? Well, that's wonderful.
149
00:08:54,400 --> 00:08:56,595
-Well, good luck to you.
-Thank you.
150
00:08:59,005 --> 00:09:00,939
Nice nun.
151
00:09:01,240 --> 00:09:04,107
No, no. Sister Roberta is not a nun.
152
00:09:04,310 --> 00:09:06,904
She is what we call a novice.
153
00:09:07,079 --> 00:09:10,207
She won't be taking her final vows
until next Thursday.
154
00:09:11,617 --> 00:09:13,209
May l help you?
155
00:09:13,386 --> 00:09:16,878
Yeah. l'm here to pick up my friend,
George Costanza.
156
00:09:17,423 --> 00:09:20,483
-Well, he's in with the Father.
-Oh, yeah.
157
00:09:21,127 --> 00:09:24,756
-l'm Sister Roberta.
-Oh, Kramer, yeah. lt's a pleasure.
158
00:09:25,231 --> 00:09:26,892
Mine.
159
00:09:28,467 --> 00:09:32,335
l can't believe how easy it is.
l'm virtually Orthodox.
160
00:09:32,505 --> 00:09:35,668
All l have to do is read a few books,
memorize a few prayers...
161
00:09:35,841 --> 00:09:37,433
...and l'm in the club.
162
00:09:37,610 --> 00:09:40,340
-That's all there is to it?
-That's all there is to it.
163
00:09:40,513 --> 00:09:44,347
By Christmas Day,
l will be Brother Costanza.
164
00:09:44,617 --> 00:09:49,077
And what is Brother Costanza
planning on telling Mother Costanza?
165
00:09:51,657 --> 00:09:55,286
Brother Costanza will be taking
the vow of silence.
166
00:09:57,730 --> 00:09:59,163
-Hey.
-Hey.
167
00:09:59,465 --> 00:10:01,228
Oh, a Slinky.
168
00:10:04,136 --> 00:10:06,696
-Sister Roberta gave it to me.
-Why'd she give you that?
169
00:10:06,939 --> 00:10:08,338
Well, l think she liked me.
170
00:10:10,242 --> 00:10:13,439
-What do you mean, she liked you?
-Liked me.
171
00:10:13,846 --> 00:10:16,644
Kramer, they like everybody.
They're friendly people.
172
00:10:17,116 --> 00:10:19,550
l think l picked up on a vibe.
173
00:10:21,120 --> 00:10:24,351
-You picked up on a vibe from a nun.
-Yeah.
174
00:10:24,724 --> 00:10:27,192
Jerry, l'm telling you,
l have this power...
175
00:10:27,360 --> 00:10:29,658
...and l have no control over it.
176
00:10:30,129 --> 00:10:31,391
Yeah. All right.
177
00:10:31,897 --> 00:10:33,660
That's my phone.
178
00:10:36,335 --> 00:10:37,597
-Oh, hi.
-Hi.
179
00:10:37,770 --> 00:10:40,261
Just wanted to stop by and see
how you were feeling.
180
00:10:40,439 --> 00:10:42,304
A little better.
181
00:10:44,644 --> 00:10:46,805
Okay. lf you need anything,
let me know.
182
00:10:46,979 --> 00:10:48,310
-Okay. All right.
-Okay.
183
00:10:48,481 --> 00:10:50,005
-Bye.
-Bye.
184
00:10:52,451 --> 00:10:53,816
Story.
185
00:10:54,654 --> 00:10:56,986
She's subletting Carol's place
for a month.
186
00:10:57,223 --> 00:10:59,885
-Yeah. She likes you.
-Yeah. But there's a problem.
187
00:11:00,059 --> 00:11:03,028
l found a tube of a fungicide
in her medicine cabinet.
188
00:11:03,896 --> 00:11:06,524
-So?
-So l don't know why she's using it.
189
00:11:06,732 --> 00:11:09,895
How do you even know it's hers?
Maybe it belonged to Carol.
190
00:11:10,069 --> 00:11:12,264
-Did you see a name on the tube?
-l didn't look.
191
00:11:12,438 --> 00:11:15,236
Well, take a look.
lt might not even belong to her.
192
00:11:15,408 --> 00:11:17,569
People always leave things
in medicine cabinets.
193
00:11:17,743 --> 00:11:19,540
l got this old bottle
of cough medicine.
194
00:11:19,845 --> 00:11:21,506
l still have Brylcreem.
195
00:11:33,392 --> 00:11:34,984
-Hi.
-Hi.
196
00:11:35,161 --> 00:11:37,755
-Could l use your bathroom?
-My bathroom?
197
00:11:40,466 --> 00:11:42,457
-You sure you don't mind?
-Oh, of course not.
198
00:11:42,635 --> 00:11:45,035
People ask me medical questions
all the time.
199
00:11:45,204 --> 00:11:48,002
Well, l mean, the question
isn't even for me, actually.
200
00:11:48,174 --> 00:11:50,472
-lt's for a friend.
-Elaine, l'm used to it.
201
00:11:51,010 --> 00:11:53,501
-l'm a doctor.
-Well...
202
00:11:53,679 --> 00:11:54,907
...podiatrist.
203
00:11:59,685 --> 00:12:03,086
No, no. l'm just saying, you didn't
really go to medical school.
204
00:12:03,255 --> 00:12:04,745
You went to podiatry school...
205
00:12:04,924 --> 00:12:08,758
...which l'm sure is very grueling
in its own way.
206
00:12:08,928 --> 00:12:12,557
l went to podiatry school
because l like feet.
207
00:12:12,732 --> 00:12:15,530
l chose to work with feet.
208
00:12:16,135 --> 00:12:21,038
-l like feet too. l'm just saying--
-Saying what?
209
00:12:23,709 --> 00:12:27,008
-How you doing in there?
-Fine. All done.
210
00:12:27,179 --> 00:12:30,273
-Just looking for the soap.
-No soap?
211
00:12:30,449 --> 00:12:32,576
No, l don't see it.
212
00:12:35,554 --> 00:12:36,543
Here you go.
213
00:12:38,491 --> 00:12:41,085
George?
What are you doing in there?
214
00:12:41,293 --> 00:12:43,386
What? Nothing.
215
00:12:43,562 --> 00:12:46,554
-You've been in there an hour.
-You don't feel well?
216
00:12:46,732 --> 00:12:48,063
-l'm fine.
-l want to know...
217
00:12:48,234 --> 00:12:51,032
-...what you're doing in there.
-Nothing.
218
00:12:51,203 --> 00:12:53,137
-George, open the door.
-No.
219
00:12:53,305 --> 00:12:55,102
-Georgie.
-No!
220
00:12:58,611 --> 00:13:00,135
-Hey.
-Good evening.
221
00:13:00,312 --> 00:13:01,779
l hope l'm not disturbing you...
222
00:13:01,947 --> 00:13:04,916
...but l found another toy
l thought you might like.
223
00:13:12,625 --> 00:13:16,186
Okay. Latvius was the son
of which apostle?
224
00:13:16,428 --> 00:13:18,919
And l'll need that
in the form of a question.
225
00:13:20,332 --> 00:13:24,428
l don't know. l can't believe
they're making me take this test.
226
00:13:26,906 --> 00:13:29,773
-Hey, did you talk to the doctor?
-No.
227
00:13:29,975 --> 00:13:32,944
All right, the next time you see him,
show him this.
228
00:13:33,245 --> 00:13:37,443
-You took her medicine.
-Well, not on purpose. l was--
229
00:13:37,616 --> 00:13:39,481
l was hoping there'd be
a name on the tube.
230
00:13:39,652 --> 00:13:42,951
-When are you seeing him again?
-l don't know. We got into this thing...
231
00:13:43,122 --> 00:13:45,852
...about how podiatrists
aren't real doctors.
232
00:13:46,025 --> 00:13:47,287
How could you say that?
233
00:13:49,094 --> 00:13:51,927
That's your fault.
You just got me thinking.
234
00:13:52,097 --> 00:13:53,894
l was merely speaking
extemporaneously.
235
00:13:54,066 --> 00:13:57,399
l've got nothing against the foot.
l'm pro-foot.
236
00:13:57,570 --> 00:13:59,128
Me too.
237
00:13:59,305 --> 00:14:03,105
-Do you think l should apologize?
-Yes. He's a doctor.
238
00:14:04,944 --> 00:14:06,605
Wait a second.
239
00:14:08,380 --> 00:14:11,349
-What are you doing?
-What does it look like l'm doing?
240
00:14:12,117 --> 00:14:13,641
''Matthew. Luke.
241
00:14:14,386 --> 00:14:15,785
Paul.''
242
00:14:16,088 --> 00:14:19,023
What, you're cheating
on your conversion test?
243
00:14:21,460 --> 00:14:22,688
-l told you.
-What?
244
00:14:22,862 --> 00:14:24,454
-l told you she liked me.
-Who?
245
00:14:24,630 --> 00:14:26,120
-Sister Roberta.
-How do you know?
246
00:14:26,298 --> 00:14:28,391
She told me.
She said she's never had a man...
247
00:14:28,567 --> 00:14:30,660
...stir up all these feelings
inside of her.
248
00:14:30,836 --> 00:14:33,896
She's questioning her faith.
She's thinking of leaving the Church.
249
00:14:35,808 --> 00:14:37,969
All this power!
250
00:14:38,677 --> 00:14:40,804
Look what l'm doing.
l'm dangerous, Jerry.
251
00:14:40,980 --> 00:14:43,505
l'm very, very dangerous!
252
00:14:52,024 --> 00:14:55,050
l must say, George,
l was somewhat surprised...
253
00:14:55,227 --> 00:14:57,661
...at the results
of your conversion test.
254
00:14:58,464 --> 00:15:03,128
l don't recall having seen
such an impressive performance.
255
00:15:04,036 --> 00:15:08,097
You truly must be filled
with the spirit of the Lord.
256
00:15:08,440 --> 00:15:10,499
Oh, l'm full of it, Father.
257
00:15:13,112 --> 00:15:14,773
Yes? Yes?
258
00:15:16,415 --> 00:15:18,212
Yes, yes, l see.
259
00:15:18,384 --> 00:15:21,547
l'm sorry. Something has come up.
260
00:15:22,021 --> 00:15:24,046
Oh, sure. l understand.
261
00:15:26,158 --> 00:15:28,183
-Hey.
-Yeah.
262
00:15:30,729 --> 00:15:33,163
-You wanted to see me, Father?
-Yes.
263
00:15:33,332 --> 00:15:35,766
Please sit down.
264
00:15:37,202 --> 00:15:39,261
Sister Roberta came
to see me yesterday--
265
00:15:39,438 --> 00:15:42,430
l know what this is about, Father.
l didn't do anything.
266
00:15:42,608 --> 00:15:45,338
l just spoke to her innocently
for just a few minutes.
267
00:15:45,544 --> 00:15:47,375
lt's just that l....
268
00:15:47,546 --> 00:15:49,309
l have this power.
269
00:15:50,683 --> 00:15:52,241
Yes.
270
00:15:55,087 --> 00:16:00,525
lt is a Latvian word which means
''the lure of the animal.''
271
00:16:01,593 --> 00:16:03,220
l don't understand.
272
00:16:03,395 --> 00:16:05,727
Women are drawn to you.
273
00:16:05,898 --> 00:16:09,163
They would give anything
to be possessed by you.
274
00:16:09,335 --> 00:16:11,735
Help me, Father. Help me!
275
00:16:11,904 --> 00:16:13,428
Yes, yes. l will help you.
276
00:16:13,605 --> 00:16:15,800
Now, listen very carefully.
277
00:16:16,008 --> 00:16:19,876
l want you to buy
1 0 cloves of garlic...
278
00:16:20,045 --> 00:16:22,639
...three quarts of vinegar...
279
00:16:22,815 --> 00:16:24,282
...6 ounces....
280
00:16:25,651 --> 00:16:29,382
What is that stench? l got it.
281
00:16:34,560 --> 00:16:36,551
-Hey.
-Hey, what the hell is going on?
282
00:16:36,729 --> 00:16:39,289
-lt stinks. What are you doing?
-l've got the kavorca.
283
00:16:39,465 --> 00:16:42,457
-The kavorca? What is that?
-The lure of the animal.
284
00:16:42,634 --> 00:16:45,194
-l'm dangerous.
-What is this thing around your neck?
285
00:16:45,371 --> 00:16:48,704
The priests, they're helping me.
l just bathed in vinegar.
286
00:16:49,174 --> 00:16:51,335
You know, you're funkifying
the whole building.
287
00:16:51,510 --> 00:16:54,445
Keep away, Jerry. Just keep away.
288
00:16:55,581 --> 00:16:57,549
Kramer! Kramer!
289
00:17:02,221 --> 00:17:03,586
George Costanza?
290
00:17:03,756 --> 00:17:05,018
Estelle's son?
291
00:17:05,457 --> 00:17:07,516
Latvian Orthodox?
292
00:17:07,693 --> 00:17:09,991
-Why are you doing this?
-For a woman.
293
00:17:10,162 --> 00:17:12,187
A woman?
What, are you out of your mind?
294
00:17:12,364 --> 00:17:15,663
Why can't you do anything
like a normal person?
295
00:17:15,834 --> 00:17:20,066
Wait. ls this the group that goes
around mutilating squirrels?
296
00:17:21,907 --> 00:17:23,397
No, it's a regular religion.
297
00:17:23,575 --> 00:17:26,544
l'm calling my lawyer. lt might not be
too late to get out of this.
298
00:17:26,712 --> 00:17:28,805
-l don't want to get out of it!
-But, George...
299
00:17:28,981 --> 00:17:32,610
...you don't know what you're saying.
You're under their control.
300
00:17:32,785 --> 00:17:35,447
-What, they brainwashed you?
-No. No.
301
00:17:35,621 --> 00:17:38,522
You're not performing any rituals
in this house!
302
00:17:38,690 --> 00:17:41,056
Go back to the psychiatrist.
l beg you.
303
00:17:41,226 --> 00:17:43,854
And stay away from those squirrels.
304
00:17:47,266 --> 00:17:49,666
-Oh, hi.
-How you doing, Jerry?
305
00:17:49,868 --> 00:17:51,961
-Good. What's the matter?
-l'm tired.
306
00:17:52,137 --> 00:17:55,265
l hardly slept last night
with all the scratching.
307
00:17:55,507 --> 00:17:57,566
Bonkers was going crazy.
308
00:17:58,577 --> 00:18:00,408
-Bonkers?
-My cat.
309
00:18:00,579 --> 00:18:03,173
He's got this weird
sort of skin condition.
310
00:18:03,348 --> 00:18:05,816
lt's some type of fungus.
l couldn't find his medicine.
311
00:18:05,984 --> 00:18:09,010
-Oh, it's your cat!
-What?
312
00:18:10,923 --> 00:18:12,220
Nothing.
313
00:18:16,695 --> 00:18:19,721
-Are you ready, my son?
-Yes, ''faddah.''
314
00:18:19,898 --> 00:18:22,059
-What did you say?
-What?
315
00:18:22,334 --> 00:18:23,995
l thought you said ''faddah.''
316
00:18:24,803 --> 00:18:27,135
l said ''faddah.'' l....
317
00:18:27,306 --> 00:18:30,139
l meant ''Father.''
Just a little bit nervous.
318
00:18:30,642 --> 00:18:32,803
Of course.
319
00:18:42,721 --> 00:18:44,382
How you doing?
320
00:18:44,556 --> 00:18:46,547
Get away from me, you creep.
321
00:18:46,725 --> 00:18:49,023
Yes. Yes, it worked!
322
00:18:49,194 --> 00:18:52,186
Sister Roberta.
l still got time to catch her.
323
00:19:09,381 --> 00:19:10,643
l gotta get there.
324
00:19:25,430 --> 00:19:28,422
Congratulations, George.
325
00:19:28,867 --> 00:19:30,801
Welcome to the faith.
326
00:19:30,969 --> 00:19:35,099
Sister Roberta, would you please
offer the final benediction?
327
00:19:39,578 --> 00:19:41,341
l can't.
328
00:19:41,513 --> 00:19:44,539
l'm sorry.
lt's a beautiful religion...
329
00:19:44,716 --> 00:19:46,240
...but l am not worthy of it.
330
00:19:47,352 --> 00:19:48,842
l've found something else.
331
00:19:53,358 --> 00:19:54,825
Him.
332
00:20:02,201 --> 00:20:06,968
You know, because l love the foot.
l'm a big fan of the foot.
333
00:20:07,139 --> 00:20:09,164
Well, it's my fault.
l got a little defensive.
334
00:20:09,341 --> 00:20:12,435
And that pinkie toe. Come on!
335
00:20:12,611 --> 00:20:15,409
How adorable is the pinkie toe?
336
00:20:15,581 --> 00:20:16,946
lt's my favorite toe.
337
00:20:17,115 --> 00:20:19,481
Let's face it. You get a bunion,
where you going?
338
00:20:19,651 --> 00:20:23,883
-You're not going to the ear guy.
-No, you're not.
339
00:20:30,596 --> 00:20:33,463
Would you excuse me?
l'll be right back.
340
00:20:34,399 --> 00:20:37,493
-Where's the bathroom?
-lt's right down here to the left.
341
00:20:38,337 --> 00:20:40,202
l will meet you right back here?
342
00:20:41,073 --> 00:20:44,839
Elaine, it's her cat.
Her cat has the fungus.
343
00:20:45,010 --> 00:20:46,375
So l need the tube back.
344
00:20:50,782 --> 00:20:52,306
Fungicide?
345
00:20:52,584 --> 00:20:54,313
Fungus?
346
00:20:57,122 --> 00:21:00,421
Something's wrong.
l don't feel the same lure.
347
00:21:01,360 --> 00:21:02,793
You don't?
348
00:21:02,961 --> 00:21:04,258
What have l--?
349
00:21:04,463 --> 00:21:07,364
l must return to the Church.
350
00:21:08,066 --> 00:21:10,591
By the way, you really need
to take a bath. You stink.
351
00:21:10,769 --> 00:21:13,101
Yeah, yeah. Yeah.
352
00:21:13,272 --> 00:21:15,035
Once you put medicine
in your cabinet...
353
00:21:15,207 --> 00:21:18,176
...you're never using it again.
Medicine you use is on the sink.
354
00:21:18,343 --> 00:21:22,040
lt's not really a medicine cabinet.
lt's really like an ointment museum.
355
00:21:22,214 --> 00:21:25,081
lt's like, ''Here's a salve from 1 983...
356
00:21:25,284 --> 00:21:28,742
...some cream from the '70s.''
But you want to keep it private.
357
00:21:28,920 --> 00:21:31,889
A medicine cabinet is a place
that reveals our weaknesses...
358
00:21:32,057 --> 00:21:35,049
...and can throw off the balance
between people that are going out.
359
00:21:35,227 --> 00:21:37,695
Somebody peeks in there,
''Oh, l see Mr. Perfect needs...
360
00:21:37,863 --> 00:21:39,956
...tough actin' Tinactin.
361
00:21:42,100 --> 00:21:46,730
Well, l guess l'll be calling the shots
in this relationship from now on.''
362
00:21:56,148 --> 00:22:00,312
-You did that for me?
-Well, l didn't do it for my mother.
363
00:22:00,852 --> 00:22:03,320
-l'm really flattered.
-Yeah.
364
00:22:04,056 --> 00:22:07,822
But l just don't feel ready
to make a commitment yet.
365
00:22:08,026 --> 00:22:09,926
Maybe when l get back from Latvia.
366
00:22:13,932 --> 00:22:15,524
Latvia?
367
00:22:15,701 --> 00:22:18,864
Yes. l'm going to stay
with some relatives there for a year.
368
00:22:19,037 --> 00:22:20,834
lsn't it great?
369
00:22:22,441 --> 00:22:24,636
Enjoy. Enjoy.
370
00:22:25,410 --> 00:22:28,777
Oh, George. You are so sweet.
371
00:22:28,980 --> 00:22:30,311
Don't ever change.
372
00:22:34,353 --> 00:22:37,117
l'd like a doggy bag for this, please.
28504
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