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Right down the road, I'll show you the darnedest contraption you've ever seen.

Beats all, what some lunatics will do these days.

Down the road a piece is one of them new steam engines.

The driver's going to stop and let us take a look at it.

How exciting!

Oh, you've seen steam engines though, haven't you, Constance, back East?

Yes, Father and I rode one in Buffalo.

Oh.

Weren't you just frightened to death, my dear?

No.

But I will admit it was dirty and uncomfortable.

Suppose it had exploded.

They do, you know?

This one didn't.

Tomorrow this engine in Joliet

is going to race the stage coach to Ottawa.

Winner gets the contract to carry the mail.

Me, I'm betting on the stage.

I disapprove of gambling.

So do I, lady.

Excepting on sure things.

Five minutes to rest your eyes on a device

that will surely prove that a fool and his money is soon parted.

Don't get too close.

Them dang things blow up right frequent like.

Hey, what's our bull master mechanic doing on this wheezy old tea kettle?

Where's your engineer?

The owner's probably got him out on sick leave.

You got her hot?

I got enough putty up to bust her dome off.

Is it liable to explode?

It's hissing like a snake.

It's just steam escaping.

Yes, so, Hogger, I'm glad you agree with me.

What holds up progress in this country is the attitude of women.

They're all so naturally timid,

they won't accept anything new, and that stifles progress.

It's a wonder to me that men get anywhere, women being what they are.

Women won't ride on trains, why?

Because they're new, so they won't let their husbands ride 'em,

and they won't let their husbands invest in railroads.

That holds back the progress of the whole nation.

It's a wonder to me that men ever got past the oxcart stage of transportation

what with women always yapping on 'em,

"It's new, so it must be dangerous."

I tell you, Hogger, that...

I beg your pardon, sir.

Ma'am.

I was not eavesdropping,

but I could not help overhearing your,

your, shall I say, somewhat childish discourse.

If women are so timid, how did civilization get this far west?

Do you suppose the early settlers would've come

if the women didn't uproot their homes and climb into wagons

to traverse a thousand miles of country infested by warlike Indians?

Uh, you may have a point there, I never thought of that.

I suggest you read early American history with a less biased eye Mr...

Loomis, Reed Loomis, ma'am,

chief engineer of the Chicago and Rock Island.

And if I may have the... Constance Strong.

And this is Miss Annabelle Marsh.

Charmed.

Mr. Hogger McCoy, our master mechanic.

- Hi. - Board.

Board for the stage coach.

May I say it's been unusual to hear

such brilliant and logical argument come from such a pretty young lady.

I look forward to continuing our debate.

We must be going.

She sure rustled and bustled at him.

I presume you'll be stopping at the Joliet house.

We can resume our talks there later.

Hardly.

I shouldn't have spoken, of course, but your views irritated me.

However, the matter's ended.

Look, but you're not going to leave me an anti-feminist.

And just when I was beginning to change my views on women.

Now, if we were both men, we could debate this subject

until one of us had convinced the other.

Any further conversation's impossible.

My fiancee is going to meet me in Joliet.

Good day. But...

Don't tell me you're one of those old-fashioned girls

who isn't allowed to speak to another man just because she is engaged.

I never expected you to be so medieval.

The Joliet house, after dinner, this evening.

Uh, 8:00?

8:00.

You've been picked up by a strange man.

Yes.

And you know, it's not at all unpleasant.

Constance.

You could make more dates with girls by starting arguments with them.

I don't understand it.

Now that's basic. That's whatsit?

You can figure out people's motives that way.

For instance, the stagecoach people that have evil motives against us.

Well, we're going to beat them to Ottawa, easy.

Well, unless they manage an accident for us.

Hop down, I want to check that boiler.

Hey, I just checked it, are you trying to insult me?

I'm thin-skinned, you know.

Yeah, like an elephant.

Be back in a minute, boss.

♪ You ought to travel The Rock Island Trail

♪ It's the way to see The country you love

Down by that stack of tires.

♪ You'll find A beautiful sight... ♪

Now, let's sum up like the lawyer fellas say.

You want to give me $500 to see that the engine busts down

and don't beat the stagecoach to Ottawa.

Well, so far, we've had a meeting of the minds.

But, now, we divide like a busted coupling pin.

I say pay now, and you say you'll pay later.

Gentlemen, it just ain't no deal.

I'm a man that operates best with barrel head cash.

I don't operate with that "tomorrow money" at all.

It ain't spendable.

Give him the money.

If you fall down on the job you could get awful unhealthy.

Oh, I'm a man that worries about his health.

Yup. Now let me store this plunder.

Come on, now, boss, I got the money.

Sure, I double-crossed you fellas, it was a pleasure.

Probably this ill-gotten money ain't gonna do me no long-term good,

so I'm going to spend it fast on wine, women and dice.

Why you...

You ought to get you a pair of these gloves,

you're going to skin up your knuckles one of these days.

We'll do our talking to my varmint,

looks like yours is going to be asleep for some time to come.

Come on up here, bucko, just get around here.

Who do you work for?

You ain't polite, mister, speak when you're spoken to.

Who's your boss?

Kirby Morrow.

All right, now, pick up your playmate

and go tell him your whole sad story.

Morrow, the big steamboat owner and head of the Steamboat Association.

Hey,

I guess he just don't want us competing with his boats.

Well, that's a natural feeling.

I heard a heap about him.

They say he's killed half a dozen men in river fights and in duels.

You ever seen him?

No, I haven't, but we will.

Letter for you, Mr. Morrow. Thank you.

Will you put this up in my room for me?

Not interested in a lady's words

as long as she isn't present, eh, Kirby?

Well, in Vicksburg, I hang on her every syllable.

But this isn't Vicksburg.

Mr. Morrow, we came here to discuss a problem, a mutual problem.

You've shown a complete lack of interest.

So far, nothing's been said to interest me.

Soon these railroads will be cutting into the profits of your riverboat lines,

just as they're already cutting into our stage business.

As soon as they get started, you're going to get hurt.

Repetition bores me.

- You're already said that a dozen times. - It's true nevertheless.

You can't stop progress.

That's right, but you can delay it.

I find that remark very vague.

That's because you don't know Kirby Morrow.

Well, those marks on your faces tell me you failed.

We was beat up something awful.

That's somewhat less than a tragedy.

Of course, I suppose you told them who sent you.

No, I...

Well, you'd have talked too if you took the beating I did.

I'll thank you not to insinuate

that I'd ever conduct myself in the same manner as you.

Sorry, Mr. Morrow.

Here comes Reed and that fellow you said was an engine driver.

We'd better duck.

That seems plausible. Go ahead.

Suppose a rail gets out of place.

Well, a section hand rides over that track in a handcar every morning.

Good old beef and garden green soup.

I'm for a bowl of that.

After I've had several appetizers.

Uh,

large whiskey smothered in two drops of water.

Ale. Same for me.

Mr. Loomis, are you going to request

a detachment of soldiers to ride the trains

as a protection against Indians?

No, we're making treaties with most of the important chiefs.

Will the Indians live up to the treaty?

Yes, I think so. I've talked to all the chiefs in Illinois.

The more important ones among them are in favor of becoming civilized.

In fact, several of them are sending their children to school.

Well, these outbreaks are mostly due to misunderstandings,

such as when Black Hawk wiped out

General Bugby's Ninth cavalry detachment at Caw Creek.

In that case, the Indians...

Sorry, I don't like that statement.

I had friends in the Ninth and I don't intend to stand by

and listen to you accuse them of stupidity and cowardice.

Gentlemen. Gentlemen, now...

Quiet! Reed...

This is in the best old time tradition I see.

I gamble the name on that card is Kirby Morrow.

At your service.

I take it I'm being challenged to a duel.

Well, this is ridiculous, dueling is against the law.

It is in Illinois but not in Mississippi.

And I'll be only too happy to provide you transportation

on any of my boats, Mr. Loomis.

And I might just as well tell you that I won't accept your apologies,

I don't care what they are.

No apologies, Mr. Fashion Plate.

I don't want the cause of this duel to be some fancied insult

to your alleged friends in the Ninth.

I'll give you your duel on some other grounds.

Your challenge, the grounds don't matter.

All right, then I'll accept in some manner in keeping with your highfalutin code.

Would it be satisfactory if I, uh, slapped you across the face with a glove?

I believe that's traditional, isn't it?

It is.

Here, use mine.

Thanks.

Here, what kind of conduct is this for a gentleman duelist?

I advise you not to choose pistols, Mr. Loomis,

because I'm the best shot in Mississippi.

However, down on the river, we got a form of dueling

that might appeal to you.

Both men are tied together by their left wrists,

in their right hands, they carry hunting knives.

Oh, no.

Clothes are too expensive and I've only got two suits.

No, I've already chosen the weapons.

This is ridiculous.

Dueling is ridiculous.

Here's your gun, Steamboat Bill, it's unloaded.

I'll bet it is.

Why, Kirby, whatever happened to you?

I hope you ladies will excuse me.

You know that gentleman, Miss Strong?

Kirby Morrow? Why, of course.

He's my fiancee.

We were to meet him here for dinner.

Well, it seems pretty obvious that he won't be present.

May I have the honor of your company?

I do wonder what happened to him.

Oh, some rude tavern brawl, no doubt.

And so, we proved the bankers wrong in every respect but one.

They said we couldn't float road bed across the sand dunes,

proved 'em wrong.

They said we couldn't get across the marshes of the Sag Valley,

we proved 'em wrong.

They said we'd go broke,

we proved them right.

♪ Maybe you're going home

♪ To see your mom Or your dad

♪ Maybe you're beating The trail to a meeting

♪ With some old pal ♪

Constance, that's the song we heard the railroad workers singing.

Yes.

Constance has a lovely voice, Mr. Reed.

Really?

Now, don't disappoint me.

Please don't be one of those singers who has to be coaxed.

♪ Just grab that Rock Island Choo choo, you lucky boy

♪ And we'll be on our way

♪ You ought to travel The Rock Island Trail

♪ It's the way to see The country you love

♪ You'll find A beautiful sight

♪ To the left or the right

♪ And the skies will be bright With sunshine above

♪ Here comes the Rock Island Train round the bend

♪ Woo Woo

♪ It'll get you Where you're going in style

♪ It travels over Lowland and highland

♪ You'll see the best Of your land and my land

♪ When you take The Rock Island train

♪ Here comes the Rock Island Train round the bend... ♪

Well, singing like that would've been worth coaxing for.

My singing teacher once said

Father got 10 cents on the dollar for what he invested in my voice.

Goodness, I didn't know it was so late.

I have letters to write, would you excuse me?

I'll be right up, Annabelle.

Really?

Really what?

Will you really be right up and waste all that wonderful moonlight outside?

I have a long, hard trip before me tomorrow.

Oh, I thought the real reason might be that just because you're engaged,

you're afraid to be seen

in the most casual conversation with another man.

You know, old-fashioned stuff.

Then let us walk in the moonlight.

I have so many questions I wish to ask you about your railroad.

I shall try to be most enlightening.

Uh, about the railroad I mean.

Constance, I'm surprised that you still prefer the stagecoach.

I had come to the conclusion

that you were a very progressive and modern young lady

and here I find you acting like a...

It won't work, Mr. Loomis.

You can stop trying to maneuver me by playing on my vanity.

I had already made preparations to go by stage,

so, I'm going by stage

even though you pretend to think that I'm old-fashioned.

Well, I'll wait for you in Ottawa.

Ladies.

Will you pardon us a minute, Annabelle?

Of course. I'll walk down along the train.

Constance, I don't want you to talk to that man.

I'm not in the habit of taking orders, Kirby.

Well, I'm not in the habit of being played for a fool,

so I'm afraid I'll have to insist.

Mr. Loomis. Yes?

Can I get two tickets?

By a strange coincidence, I happen to have two tickets in my pocket.

Let's get Annabelle.

We're losing.

It's 50 miles from here to Ottawa.

They've got to change horses ten times between here and there.

Well, if you ladies will excuse me, I've got to get up to the engine.

♪ Here comes the Rock Island Train round the bend

♪ Woo woo ♪

She's getting there.

She's moving down the mainline and singing like a birdie.

Hey, fella, you asked for work.

When you come, bend your back.

Here goes to my new invention.

Well, that smells... I smell cloth burning.

It's my hat, madam, but it's out now.

That's a waste of lard.

I'm gonna beat that stagecoach

if I have to use up all the hog fat in Illinois.

We'll be in Ottawa an hour ahead of 'em.

But listen, I'm gonna make it two hours if I have to tie down the safety valve.

♪ Here comes the Rock Island Train round the bend ♪

It's getting stronger.

Oh, what?

Hold still, you little wildcat!

Mr. Loomis!

Oh!

Oh, I see.

At first, I thought you had gone mad.

Thank you very much, Reed.

I mean, Mr. Loomis.

It was a pleasure, I assure you, Miss Strong.

And, of course, I mean, Constance.

The road's coming into sight.

I wonder if we'll see the stage?

Ya!

Ya!

Aren't you glad you didn't ride the stage?

Adios, Morrow!

I'll see you in Ottawa.

Here comes the train.

Hello, Mr. Strong.

Annabelle, I thought you and my daughter were coming by stagecoach.

No, we were put on the train by a very nice man who tore off her clothes.

What? Oh, it's quite all right, Mr. Strong.

A man tears my daughter's clothes off and it's quite all right?

Yes, they were on fire. What?

The clothes, I mean.

That's plausible.

I hope she replaces them before getting off the train.

Well, she has in a way.

Oh, I'm beginning to see.

Hello, Father.

Father, this is Mr. Loomis.

And that's Mr. Loomis' coat.

Well, I... Well, a small accident, sir.

Annabelle was telling me.

Young man, how'd you like to have dinner with us?

Kill two birds with one stone,

get your coat back and tell me about railroads.

It isn't that I don't believe your devices are mechanically correct,

it's just that I have a banker's dislike for pioneering.

Well, someone's got to provide transportation for the Middle West.

This could be the bread basket of the nation with transportation secured.

I know all that.

Even before you told me so repetitiously at dinner.

It's just that you want to build empires.

And I want to protect the money the investors have entrusted to me.

I'm going to wait till the pioneers go broke.

Good evening, Mr. Strong. Good evening.

I'd like to call on Miss Constance if I may.

She's in the music room of our suite. Thank you very much.

Kirby has such a wealth of manners and such a poverty of ethics.

Come in.

Well, you know why I'm here.

I feel sure I do.

But you were never one for avoiding issues, Kirby.

Put it into words.

Well, I'm trying to find some kind of an explanation for your behavior.

The explanation's in that little box on the table.

You know, I'm not in the habit of letting anybody take things away from me.

"Things," Kirby?

That's the trouble.

You regard things and people as the same.

They're not.

I'd hoped this could be friendly.

I'm also not in the habit of being friendly

at the same time I'm being made a fool of.

But this isn't final, Constance.

Good night.

I'd like a few words with Loomis if you'll excuse us, Mr. Strong.

Of course.

Loomis, the Sheriff called on me today

and he left no doubt in my mind what his actions would be

if I caused you any further trouble or if any harm came to you.

So I presume you took your troubles to him.

No, I didn't.

But you go right on thinking anything that'll make you happy.

Oh, I won't attack you.

Not here in Illinois, the so-called stronghold of law and order.

But one of these days, south of the Ohio or west of the Mississippi,

we'll run into each other and I'll kill you.

You're something out of the Dark Ages,

or else you're just a swaggering bully.

I don't know which, but whichever it is, I'm tired of you.

You know, the Sheriff might be just about as upset

if you murdered me as vice-versa.

No murder.

I'm just tired of you having all the fun.

Look at that sign.

The letter "O" to be exact.

Say, that was a fine shot.

It was my turn to show off.

I look forward to meeting you one of these days

on the other side of the river.

Thought I heard a shot.

Somebody's celebrating down at Camptown.

Probably. Let's get back to the table.

Don't underestimate Morrow, Reed, he's come a long hard way,

left many a broken man along his path.

Yeah, that was kind of childish of me with that pistol,

but he rubs me the wrong way.

You shoot well, can you sing?

A little. Why?

I'm sure Constance would appreciate a baritone and someone to turn the pages.

Reed, are you on the level about building track all the way to Rock Island?

Mr. Strong, someday, I intend to build track clear across this territory.

Let's not indulge in pipe dreams,

the Mississippi is in your way.

However, I will assure you financing for track to Rock Island.

Let's not discuss it now.

You go turn pages while I enjoy my cigar.

So, fine feathers Morrow got his lance broken, huh?

I don't understand. Indian custom.

Warrior sticks his lance in the ground outside a young squaw's lodge.

If it's broken in the morning, it means she says no.

I can't say I enjoy being compared to a squaw, Mr. Loomis.

When was I demoted to Mr. Loomis? My name's Reed.

Really, Mr. Loomis?

I don't believe I invited any such familiarity.

Oh, why are women like that?

Why are women like what?

Always so worried about the appearance of things,

move, countermove.

That's a lot of nonsense.

We both knew right from the beginning.

I haven't the faintest idea of what you're talking about.

I knew right from the beginning.

'Course I'm not gonna ask you to marry me.

Would I be bold to ask why not.

'Cause you're rich.

What is that, a disgrace?

Is it like having a two-headed brother or a...

Do you mind explaining? Not at all.

Rich women tell their husbands what to do.

Me, I'm gonna tell my wife what to do.

Good night, Mr. Loomis.

Don't be silly.

Forgive me if I seem dull-minded,

but it seems to me a man

who has just mauled me about and kissed me by force...

Really? By force?

Yes, by force.

And then informed me he had no intention of asking me to marry him.

Is that a fair statement of the facts?

Uh, reasonably so.

Good night, Mr. Loomis.

But you overlooked a very simple solution.

Tell me, please.

I'll get rich.

Father.

He won't marry me.

That's strange.

From his actions I would've thought otherwise.

But it's quite all right.

Honey, I may be broad-minded,

but what will your maiden aunt say about such an extremely modern attitude?

Well, you see, sir, I don't want to get married...

Young man, my daughter has just told me that

your intentions are not honorable.

Personally, I don't care much about a man's intentions,

because, in the end, a woman always gets her way.

Well, I just don't want to be anybody's poor relation.

Father, tell him he's crazy.

I can't do that, honey, he's quite sane.

Never hurt any girl to wait until a man made a little money. Smoke?

No, thank you, sir.

I don't suppose it'll bother you folks too much

if I take a little stroll on the veranda.

I hate all men.

Population of the world would decrease rather rapidly

if all women felt like that.

Two can play the waiting game.

Hey, Reed. Reed.

Huh?

What is it? You better get over to the mess hall,

somebody's smuggled in a barrel of whiskey.

Got any idea who did it?

Just as good an idea as you got, them steamboat people.

That big tie-layer Barton, he's at the head of it.

I didn't like his looks when you hired him.

All right, let's go.

All right, that's enough! That's all, men!

It's going to get early real sudden around here,

and we got a grade to make tomorrow.

Are you telling us that we can't even have a little drink?

What I'm telling you is you're fired.

And you've got just five minutes to get started backtracking.

Do you men like being treated like this?

- Dump that whiskey in the river, Hogger. - Yeah.

Get your hands off of that barrel or you'll feel a sledge.

Well, you're the worst spike driver in this outfit.

You'd probably miss.

Just lay your hand on that barrel.

How about a whiskey with water?

Hey, don't overdo it.

Probably more water than you've ever encountered before.

Now, start up that track fast enough to dry off.

Now, I'll tell you something.

Heaving a shovel or swinging a sledge is hard work

when you haven't had any sleep.

And you've got about three hours till that whistle blows.

And I'll tell you something else.

This mile of track into Rock Island is going to get built in the morning

if I gotta prime every one of you

with a kick in your handkerchief pocket.

That's all.

You know something?

They'll go to bed just like little lambs now.

Just goes to prove that whiskey should be kept from the lower classes.

Thank you, Martin.

Are you Mr. Strong? That's right.

Where to, sir? End of track.

And the young lady too, sir?

Unless your hearing is poor, I said end of track.

Yes, sir, we're due to leave immediately. I'll get your bags aboard.

The man's right, end of track is no place for a woman.

Where I'll be the only woman,

when there's a possibility of Indian trouble.

I admit the possibility is remote, but I still say...

You've said it before.

And I've said I want to be on the first train into Rock Island.

You think Rock Island and end of track is gonna be the same

by the time this train gets there?

Reed made a contract for the 17th of this month.

Tomorrow is the 17th.

Well, that's what I call faith.

He's had labor trouble, you know? I know.

And also, I know Reed.

- All aboard! - Just a minute, conductor.

You'll have to hold the train. Hold the train?

Young man, this train is due to leave here right now, and it's going to leave.

These are orders from the War Department.

You are to await the arrival of the train from the east

to pick up a very important passenger for end of track.

Well, now I don't know that I'm going to do that.

Well, I know. Well,

well, all right.

If this is not a military secret,

might I inquire as to who this important passenger is?

It's not a military secret, sir, but as a matter of fact, I don't know.

Excuse me.

Probably some political bigwig on a junket to the construction camp.

So he can go back to Washington and advise against helping the railroads.

Train is ready for end of track, sir. Thank you, lieutenant.

Father, look.

Tickets for both these ladies for end of track.

End of track, sir.

No lady ever goes to end of track. Hmm?

The maid's afraid she's going to be scalped by Indians.

What's that?

Do you mind letting me in on this? I don't speak French.

You heard correctly. I am an Indian.

Oh, now really?

It quite startles so many people. But French?

And your English is so perfect. Thank you.

But it's not nearly so perfect as my grandfather's.

He did not start studying until he was over 60.

Who is your grandfather?

Keokuk. The peacemaker?

Well, he became known as that after he began

leading the tribes toward peace and civilization.

Oh, I'm beginning to understand

why the army was so concerned about your welfare.

May I ask one more impertinent question?

Where did you get that gown? Oh.

In Paris.

Father, in short order, you're going to be stuck for a trip to Paris.

Your Indian princess is taking long enough to dress.

I'll bet she's gonna knock your eyes out with another Paris creation.

Prepare yourself for a shock, father.

Well, young lady, for the first time I really believe you're an Indian.

It's beautiful.

Thank you.

Hold it. Looks like we made it, men.

Anybody got a headache? Mr. Loomis?

Yes. I'm the mayor of Rock Island.

I suppose as the first train arrives

you'll be able to keep the celebration quiet

until I can make my speech.

Well, I don't know... Hey, Reed!

Looks like you're gonna have some fireworks with this celebration.

Get your rifles, you men.

This'd be the first scalp I took in ten years.

Shut up, you blood-thirsty liar.

Don't anybody fire until they do.

How'd you do?

What's all the show about?

I don't know.

I was told to guide these Indians down to end of track,

and meet some big chief or something.

Guiding Indians ain't the brightest thing I ever heard of.

You got a drink?

Uh, no whiskey allowed at end of track.

Mister, I recognize this man from Fort Des Moines

and he was never farther away from whiskey than one big jump.

You got me mixed up with my brother, soldier.

We're the spittin' image of each other. He spits a little further than I do.

Would you want me to tell how and why

you or your brother happened to leave Fort Des Moines?

Come on with me.

But you don't have to talk so blame loud.

Hello, Connie.

Oh, I'm glad that train was on time today.

There's a sight.

There's nothing to be frightened of, Annette.

Oh, I'm no longer afraid, mademoiselle.

I see.

Au revoir.

I'm quite sure I will be well protected. I have no fear.

May we?

Huh?

I will teach you the French.

Gee.

Get up!

You weren't getting too big a thrill of the ceremony.

Speeches bore me.

Father says the contracting of freight exceeds all expectations.

He says, in short order, you're going to be wealthy.

Does he?

He also says if you don't give up the idea of bridging the Mississippi,

you and the road could wind up in bankruptcy.

Reed, stop looking at the river.

Does that blamed old bridge mean so much to you?

Constance, half the United States

lays near the side of that river.

I could decide all these arguments in my sleep.

I have in fact.

It's been a year since that night in Ottawa.

You said you wanted money.

Didn't matter to me.

Now I wonder which you want most.

Me, or a bridge.

The issue was never in doubt.

Grovel all you want to, old father of waters.

What difference does it make who throws the first bridge across?

It's just a question of whose name goes

on some plaque which nobody'll ever read.

Go ahead. Build your blamed old bridge.

I'll wait.

That's very nice of you, darling.

But I don't know anything about counterfeiting,

and we're just $2,00,000 short.

Oh.

Well, you can get that much from the army.

Look, I know you get around with the financiers

but the army is quite another matter.

I've already talked to General Taylor,

in Washington, at a ball.

We danced 11 straight dances together.

Next morning we went riding, and that afternoon, at tea...

Just a moment. How big is this General Taylor?

Hmm.

As big as you are.

Oh?

And he's 65 years old.

I got him all excited about the bridge.

He thinks it's badly needed by the army.

Uh...

I wasn't gonna tell you.

But if you want a bridge more than a bride...

I want you to have your way.

We're gonna have great kids,

take after their papa for size and their mama for brains.

Reed, this thing's gotten to be a nightmare with me.

Can't you be satisfied with a small bridge?

Do you have to have a big one like this? He does.

Well, we'll put all the army money and our shirts into one heap.

You can star driving piling tomorrow.

Did yesterday.

Now you see why I'm so mad about him.

Yeah, and I can understand why people get mad at him.

I'm trying to think. What about?

Your expression at every train that goes across.

I think the best description is,

"He looks like an idiot with a slingshot

"who's just found a deserted house with all its windows unbroken."

Well, it does give me a kick, honey.

I wish I can make your eyes light up like that.

You make something inside me flare up like a torch.

Now let's get down to facts.

Are there liable to any more obstacles

in the way of your making an honest woman of me?

Not a chance.

We lay an easy 300 miles of track from the Iowa shore to Fort Fletcher.

Say to Uncle Sam, "Pay us the last payment."

Then we sit back and cut coupons, and raise brats.

9:30, bucko.

You could've shook me before you tried that water, Stewart.

When you've been on the grog

shaking never works.

I'm up. Let me relax, I gotta get over this shock.

Well, you said you had to go to work.

I'll make it.

I won't like it, but I'll make it.

Mr. Morrow? Yes.

Here's the manifest on The Princess.

100 barrels of resin,

200 barrels of turpentine, and 70 bales of cotton.

I hate to ask for insurance on the cargo,

it has the makings of such a fine fire.

Well, we're not insuring either cargo or vessel.

This is worth a lot of money and...

Look, we're shooting for much higher stakes

than a vessel and a cargo.

So I don't want any insurance investigators

cold-nosing around.

Or they might get the impression

that The Princess was set on fire deliberately.

The crew's all ashore and drunk by now.

So there'll be nobody to testify she just didn't go adrift.

Sure you want to handle this all alone?

Sure, I'm sure. Then I know it'll be done right.

You'll get those pretty clothes all dirty.

You're aboard my ship, Loomis.

Pointing that pistol at me makes you a pirate

and they hang pirates on the river.

Well, I don't want know what they do to bridge-burners,

but we won't find out.

Start topside, we're changing course.

Doctors said I didn't need rebandaging until tomorrow.

They were soiled.

You just want to act like a little angel of mercy.

Florence Nightingale.

Anyway, you're an angel of some sort.

No wonder Morrow tried to burn me up.

Why don't you two get married and stop dripping honey all over my house?

Bad for the rugs.

That's right. Get married,

so you can fight with each other like ordinary people.

You know the answer. The young man has scruples,

won't marry a rich woman until he's got money.

I'll say this for you, Reed.

You can start from scratch, you're the brokest man I know.

That bond issue was offered yesterday on the street, no bids.

Of course, I could give my money away. Then we'd both be broke.

And he'd have no excuse whatsoever.

Let's not carry this thing too far.

I, uh... I did, I'm afraid.

This morning I wired the executor of Mama's estate to put all my money into

Rock Island bonds.

What's that?

That's Sioux for, "The woman shines." The highest accolade.

A buck Indian's most ardent profession of love and devotion.

I'm thinking of your mother's father and grandfather.

They must be spinning so violently that they've dislodged their tombstones.

How they fought for that fortune.

And now it's in the bonds of a defunct railroad.

Constance, your money's gone down the drain.

Suppose we could win a judgment from the boat association,

we might rebuild that bridge if we got a big enough judgment.

Reed, we only have your word

that that boat didn't just accidentally drift against that bridge.

But we know it was sabotage.

In all justice... Constance,

you bought Rock Island bonds.

And now you believe in justice in a court that's controlled by the steamboat people.

I'm beginning to doubt your sanity.

Young man, it looks like you're gonna get your wish.

Constance, you better make up your mind to be happy, but poor.

Hey, poor people. Huh?

You're wonderful.

Well, there it is.

I want to tell you, sir, that every big-city lawyer has refused this case

on the grounds that we lack sufficient evidence.

The board of directors thinks I'm foolish to...

Bring it to a small-town lawyer, huh?

Well, no...

That's right.

Tie up over there, will you?

Hey, son. Yeah?

From that hair and the freckles on your face,

I'd say you're one of the Tanner brood.

Some kind of relation to old man Springtime Tanner?

Yeah, he's my grandpa.

I'm Stinky Tanner.

Well, you sure wear the family marks.

I'm Abe Lincoln.

Pleased to make your acquaintance, Stinky.

What are you catching, catfish?

No, you can't get cats here, they don't like the current.

You get bass and bream here.

Over there where there's no current, you get cats.

Over there where the boat burnt down the bridge.

Now if you want some big cats... Hold on a minute, son.

Uh...

I see you got an extra pole.

If you'll excuse me, Mr. Loomis, I'm going fishing.

Well, but, Mr. Lincoln, I... It's been my experience that a fellow

who's all puzzled up gets unpuzzled when he goes fishing.

Bye, Mr. Loomis.

And to resume, Your Honor, we have proven beyond a shadow of a doubt

that this was an accident, and not actionable at law.

The Princessbroke loose from her moorings and drifted down against the bridge.

Now, in closing, I shall also like to point out to Your Honor

that the opposing counsel, Mr. Lincoln, has not asked one single question

in cross-examination of our many expert witnesses.

My case rests.

Well, Mr. Lincoln.

If the court please,

I should like to call an expert witness.

An expert witness on the currents

and cross-currents of the Mississippi River

at Rock Island.

We've had so many experts... Why, I'm sure the jury

will wish to hear this expert witness.

I intend to prove that The Mississippi Princess

did not drift against the bridge,

but was deliberately steered across the current.

Very well.

I wish to call Mr. Stinky Tanner.

That man's a fool to bring that child in here against expert witnesses.

Shh. Let's wait. I believe in Mr. Lincoln.

Are you attempting a practical joke on this court, Mr. Lincoln?

Judge, I'm as serious as an unfed mule.

Swear him.

Do you swear to tell the whole truth

and nothing but the truth, so help you God?

Yes, sir.

Stinky, this is a picture of that burnt bridge.

Now, I'll show you the section that's still left standing.

Can you catch catfish there?

No, there's too much current there.

The best place for cats is over here,

where the steamboat hit the bridge and burned it.

Here, where there is no current?

Yes, sir, cats won't stay where there's any current.

In other words, the current would not carry

any drifting boat into this burnt section.

That's right.

Well, then, gentlemen, it would appear

that The Mississippi Princess did not drift

but was steered under her own power into the bridge.

Take a hand, Hogger?

I ain't too particular about my company,

but I'm too particular for you loafers.

You hunting trouble?

You know, I've been known to do just that.

Watch out for those gloves, Bill.

How long since you've been paid?

Same as you, half a week.

Yeah, half in money and half in script

to be cashed when the road reaches Fort Fletcher.

How do we know it'll ever get there?

I know it'll get there. How?

'Cause Reed Loomis says so.

Oh, why do you idiots think all this whiskey's coming into camp?

I know. It's because somebody

don't want to see this railroad built, that's why.

They're likely to get their way as far as I'm concerned.

You dang loafers.

Darned idiots.

There ain't a man working in the whole kit and valley.

Track layers will be caught up with us in a week.

We know that. Someone's gotta hunt up

the survey party and tell Reed.

Well, that makes sense.

How about you? You know the country.

Not me, I'm a railroad man, not a messenger boy.

Here's the mail. End of track, Mr. McIntyre,

and your official mail. Thank you.

Hello, Hogger. Hi.

Say, somebody around end of track have been making inquiries about you.

Want to know if you're the same McCoy that used to be down at Fort Des Moines.

I ain't never been near Fort Des Moines.

Get me a horse and some accouterments, and I'll go find Reed.

Hello, Hogger. Good to see you.

Anything the matter?

I caught the trail of a million Indians when I forded the Sauk River.

They're Keokuk's people. They rendezvous over there every summer.

They're peaceful.

I didn't hunt 'em up to find out. I like my Indians at a distance.

Field-glass distance.

You know who's stirring 'em up, and you know who's causing the trouble.

Yeah, naturally.

Joe,

I've got to go back to end of track.

Let's see, four days going, four days back,

and a day to settle the trouble,

I'll see you in nine or ten days, you'd be all right?

Sure, I'll be all right.

Bye, Joe. If you settle this ruckus in one day,

you're wasting your time running one measly railroad.

You ought to be President of the USA.

Looks like somebody's trying to commit murder.

Are we gonna deal ourselves in? Let's go.

Here comes a couple more. Don't shoot.

Now if anybody should happen to ask you,

there goes a couple of pretty fair horseman.

We're not in the habit of leaving our wounded to the enemy.

And your own General Taylor said

the Plains Indians have the finest cavalry in the world.

Hey. Ain't you that Indian girl

who'd come in on the train with all that foofoo ra?

Keokuk's granddaughter.

And you're Mr. Loomis,

the man who's building the railroad. You were pointed out to me.

This doesn't make any sense.

Why should Indians be trying to shoot Keokuk's granddaughter?

They're Sioux. They don't like Keokuk,

or at least his ideas of adopting the white man's way of life.

Did you think all Indians agree about everything?

We don't.

We're people.

Thank you.

I don't think they were anxious to kill me though.

Probably just wanted to capture me.

That would put them in a position to dictate to my grandfather.

I understand you're having trouble building the railroad, Mr. Loomis.

Well, that's one way of putting it.

We're hexed, that's what we are.

And I know who's hexing us, too.

But we are having a little more than the usual troubles.

Whiskey coming into camp, troublemakers,

200 grade workers won't even lift a shovel.

I see.

Perhaps I could help you.

Well, I'm afraid we might not have a shovel small enough for you, Miss...

Uh...

Say, what do they call an Indian princess anyway?

Well, I insist that people I'm not interested in call me princess.

You call me Aleeta.

And even though you don't think I could handle a shovel

I might surprise you and help you get your railroad built.

Oh.

There's a good place for us to make camp down there

by the river.

Down here.

Come here.

Well, I guess we must have a couple of dozen by now.

Well, you Indians sure do it the easy way.

Just make 'em jump right into your net.

Us, we scramble around diggin' 'em.

Do you mind if I have a puff of your cigar?

Huh?

This habit isn't Indian, it's Parisian.

You're sure a strange mixture.

I've often felt so.

Indian by birth, cosmopolitan by education.

It makes strange impulses.

For instance, I like men who build things.

Most Indians don't.

They want everything just the way nature made it.

Uh,

You think we got enough frogs?

Let's go rest on the bank.

You don't rise to the bait, Reed.

The conversational bait didn't work, so

I thought I'd try proximity.

What's her name? Whose name?

Don't be ordinary.

Constance.

I hate her.

If I had her out on the plains,

I'd swing her scalp from the ridge pole of my teepee.

First, of course,

killing her by a process involving burning splinters,

which takes many days.

You look so sweet, and sound so blood-thirsty.

Well,

at least that's what I would've done before I went to school.

I finally find a man I'd like to investigate,

and he carries another woman's charm in his medicine bag.

May I have another puff of your cigar?

You know,

I could have some warriors carry you off.

Kidnap you.

Hold you in a rendezvous out on the plains.

Hey, be careful. You make me nervous.

Of course. Because you're not sure I'm joking.

You must be.

Maybe.

Let's go back to camp.

Yeah.

What in the name of Robert Roose is that bunch of Indians doing here?

Getting jobs.

You boys get out there and sign 'em on.

A few of 'em can write, the rest of 'em can make their mark.

Indians working with pick-and-shovel, it's unheard of.

The ones in front can speak English, they'll interpret for the rest.

Get going, boys. Let's get some grade made.

This is the first time Indians ever worked for pay.

And now that the Indians are working,

the other fellas want their old jobs back again.

Well, people are like that.

Put 'em all on, Mac. You're going back surveying?

That's right. And then to Davenport.

Keep things movin'.

I will if I have to learn to speak Indian.

You're a callous cur.

You callous cur.

What do you want me to do, break my arm to prove that I love you?

I may save you the trouble.

Only a callous cur would leave a woman

as attractive as me to talk to some moldy businessman.

You callous cur.

You said that before. Mm-hmm.

I grow repetitious in my spinsterhood.

Careful.

So you are the Constance. I should've known.

Well, I'll just have to call off my witchcraft.

Witchcraft?

Yes, I was having an Indian curse put on you

so you would die of some disfiguring disease.

Hello, Reed.

I was terribly bold with him, all too Parisian.

Never increased his heartbeat by one iota.

Oh, I'm sorry. Miss Strong, may I present Major Porter.

Miss Strong. Major, this is Reed Loomis.

Major. Mr. Loomis.

As soon as the men start to cluster in the refreshment room,

we'll manage a gossip together.Fine.

So you're a one-woman man.

Well, one woman at a time.

What are you looking for?

Something to fracture your skull with,

or something with which to fracture your skull.

I may as well be grammatical even though I'm murderous.

Honey, I have to go.

I know, logically, you have to go.

But I want to be illogical. I'm a female.

Hmm. Muah.

Come on.

Well, there are the pallbearers. Shall we go in?

You gentlemen burying the nation

because the stock market took a header?

Looks bad. Take a look at these treasury reports.

May I smoke?

Of course.

If it wouldn't shock everybody, I would myself.

That's Kirby Morrow, the big steamboat man.

Mr. Morrow, sir.

Dancing in the main dining room.

And refreshments in the annex.

Thank you very much, but I don't think I'll go in just now.

I think I'll smoke a cigar first.

Yes, sir.

Good luck with your business meeting, Reed.

Thanks, we'll need it.

Goodbye, darling.

Will you get my horse, please? Yes, sir.

Would you call my carriage? Quickly, please.

You're not leaving. Has something offended you?

Nothing has offended me, and I'm not leaving.

It's merely that I forgot to tell my coachman something.

That language, I studied it.

Couldn't make head or tail of it. No syntax.

I dare say you think we Indians are an odd people, Major.

You're right. We are. Shall we go inside?

You dirty redskin.

Well, your throat can't be cut if you can swear, old man.

You've just been ear-marked or throat-marked, rather.

Well, they got away with your nice thoroughbred, Kirby.

You're afoot.

Of course, my horse could pack double,

but I don't think you'd enjoy the company.

However, it's only 12 miles to Davenport, and...

I don't think it's gonna rain.

Those nice new shiny shoes ought to be real pleasant to walk in.

Adios.

Gentlemen,

I've been listening to all this testimony.

To me, it sums up to this.

The Rock Island entered into a contract with the Unites States Government

in which the Rock Island agreed to lay track to Fort Fletcher.

The Rock Island has not fulfilled its contract.

And is now asking for more of the taxpayer's money

so that it may lay this track. This is ridiculous.

Senator, there's a panic on.

I'm fully aware there's a panic on, Mr. Loomis.

That's one of the more cogent reasons I take this stand.

We must retrench in times like these.

On the contrary, Senator,

if we are to defeat this panic we must expand.

A somewhat radical theory of economics to my mind.

No, gentlemen.

I'm gonna fight this bill on the floor of the Senate.

And I'm gonna see that it's defeated.

Hello.

Well, what's the matter, Constance? Aren't we speaking?

Really, Kirby. Let's not have good manners.

Well, at least your manners ought to be good enough

to introduce me to your charming companion here.

No.

Well, it isn't necessary.

You're Chief Keokuk's granddaughter, aren't you?

The educated Indian princess.

And, of course,

everyone on the Mississippi knows the celebrated Kirby Morrow.

Well, I didn't realize I was so famous, thanks.

All the Sioux and Sauk tribes know you.

They've even given you an Indian name.

I'm not familiar enough with the Sioux language

to know the meaning of that name.

It means warrior, without honor.

You know, some man is gonna have a very interesting life

even though it might be a little dangerous.

Naturally, I mean the man that you marry.

Well, did you get your money, Loomis?

Why don't we just skip all the preliminaries

and get right to the point?

Would you like to step out on the lawn so I can beat your brains out?

I don't believe so, thanks.

And do you mind if I rush off and leave you in bad company?

Alone.

Say, what are your bonds selling at this morning?

Now, don't walk away.

I'm interested. I've been buying those bonds ever since the crash.

That makes me one of your investors,

so I feel I'm entitled to a little of your advice.

What should I do with them?

You'd never follow my advice.

No, I guess not.

You know, at first, I thought I might use 'em for wallpaper

in a saloon on one of my boats.

Then I thought it might be very interesting...

if you never got to Fort Fletcher.

That might make me wind up owning a bankrupt railroad,

but I'd be your employer.

Well, I'll just carry a resignation around

all made out in advance for that day.

But I won't mail it, I'll deliver it by hand.

I do wish you'd stay with us for dinner.

I'm afraid I'm condemned to a dull dinner...

with the Commissioner of Indian Affairs.

But I will see you next month.

Goodbye. Goodbye.

Mr. Morrow? Yes.

I wish to satisfy my curiosity, Mr. Morrow.

Couple of roughnecks tried to cut my throat

but they didn't quite get the job done.

They were not roughnecks.

All three are accredited members of the Sauk tribe

despite their rough clothing.

Oh, they were your men.

I hope you've learned your lesson, Mr. Morrow.

If any more attempts are made on Mr. Loomis' life

I shall have to have you killed in a long, painful manner.

You would much rather your throat were cut.

Drive on. Now wait a minute.

You know, you're wasting your time.

You'll never get him away from Constance, he's in love with her.

I am completely aware of that and had no intention of trying.

You know, I admire you.

You're in love with him, and what I said was a body blow.

You never even turned a hair, and your voice remained perfectly calm.

You've got control.

Of course.

I'm an Indian,

which means another thing.

We make very sound friends and implacable enemies.

Remember that.

Driver.

He says 50 rifles isn't enough.

Tell him that's all I can get.

The army's watching all the guns west of the Mississippi

like they was diamonds.

Tell him there'll be plenty of rifles and a lot of ammunition on the train.

He accepts.

What's that last he said?

He said all white men are liars, and your word probably isn't any good.

But he accepts because he figures this deal is to your advantage,

and you won't lie.

You know, that Indian'd do pretty good in the steamboat business

the way he figures.

Or any other business for that matter.

We'll be ready to leave in five minutes. All right.

I repeat, Constance, I think the idea's idiotic.

I can handle anything Aleeta can.

Yes, but to go to an Indian village, I...

I don't think you need worry, Mr. Strong.

Let's use Reed's office to change in.

Thank you.

I tried to persuade her not to go out there, but I didn't have any luck.

Neither did I.

Then it's undoubtedly all right.

Although I'd feel a lot better if we didn't have the payroll on board.

You and I and the guards are the only ones that know about it.

They're loading the stuff now.

That's all that has to happen is for us to lose that payroll.

It'd cause more delay at end of track.

As it is now, our arrival at Fort Fletcher

and the termination of that army contract's

gonna be the closest tie in history.

Train's ready.

Hey, Hogger. I've got a special run.

String going out to end of track, you wanna take it?

No, sir, I just pulled in a 30-car string from Davenport with a weak back farmer

and a loose driving wheel.

What I want is rest and a little whiskey.

I just asked. All right.

Where can I find Mr. McCoy?

What'd you say? McCoy!

Ought to be along pretty soon.

Soon? Yeah.

That's fine.

Hey.

Get yourself a beauty rest, Rafe. I'm pulling this string.

But you said... That was then, this is now.

Can I highball?

Just a minute.

McCoy!

Hogger McCoy!

McCoy!

What was that?

That was the reason I left Fort Des Moines.

You girls, get back inside!

Boss!

How many rifles have you got, Mac? Forty-five.

End of track, huh?

Can you get me a big piece of canvas?

We'll use that smoke to signal my people at the Sauk River.

Tell him all we have to do is wait till nightfall,

we can pick 'em off like flies.

All right, then do it the hard way.

Constance, do you mind if I kiss your man?

Well, Loomis, you win, you got the best hold card.

My granddaughter is dead.

Go, Loomis.

Now wait a minute... You're wasting your time, Loomis.

It will give me great pleasure if you whimper, Morrow.

Well, I'd sure hate to disappoint you, Chief.

I now pronounce you man and wife.

Kiss the bride.

It was a long tough job, but I finally got it done.

Frankly, I didn't think we'd make it.

But here we are, about to pull into Fort Fletcher.

And we're solvent. Father-in-law,

you know it's only 2,100 miles from Fort Fletcher to California.

No, no, not again.

You bankers are hard to convince.

You'll live to see the day when this whole nation'll be on wheels,

when a billion tons of freight and millions of passengers

will be moved every day.