All language subtitles for Arthur.2.On.The.Rocks.1988.1080p.BluRay.x265-RARBG 6_English
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1
00:01:02,612 --> 00:01:04,341
Why aren't you laughing, Bitterman?
2
00:01:04,414 --> 00:01:05,904
You haven't said anything, sir.
3
00:01:05,982 --> 00:01:08,974
l see, fine, so you're waiting
till the last minute.
4
00:01:24,968 --> 00:01:28,267
Hello. Hi. How rich are you?
5
00:01:28,338 --> 00:01:29,464
l beg your pardon?
6
00:01:29,539 --> 00:01:32,235
lsn't having money
the most fabulous thing ever?
7
00:01:32,308 --> 00:01:35,368
Every day is like Christmas morning,
am l right?
8
00:01:35,912 --> 00:01:39,507
l don't think of personal wealth
in those terms exactly.
9
00:01:39,582 --> 00:01:41,675
Yeah, you're right, of course.
10
00:01:41,751 --> 00:01:44,686
Yeah, it doesn't matter
whether you're rich or poor...
11
00:01:44,754 --> 00:01:47,951
as long as you can buy anything
on the planet you ever wanted.
12
00:01:48,024 --> 00:01:49,719
Am l right? Answer me!
13
00:01:51,327 --> 00:01:53,227
l'm not quite sure.
14
00:01:53,296 --> 00:01:55,127
Hey, those your initials?
15
00:01:55,865 --> 00:01:57,924
l'll bet you had to try a thousand dealers...
16
00:01:58,001 --> 00:02:00,196
before you found a car
with your initials on it.
17
00:02:00,270 --> 00:02:03,068
This is probably nowhere near
the color you wanted, either.
18
00:02:03,139 --> 00:02:04,436
Funereal black.
19
00:02:20,223 --> 00:02:24,353
Hi, it's me again.
Did you miss me? l'll bet you did.
20
00:02:24,694 --> 00:02:26,787
Please remove yourself from my car.
21
00:02:26,863 --> 00:02:30,594
l wish l could, but l have to ride like this.
l'm over 17 feet tall.
22
00:02:34,037 --> 00:02:37,666
This is funny stuff. ls there
someone else in there l could talk to?
23
00:02:37,740 --> 00:02:40,174
You're Arthur, aren't you?
Stanford Bach's boy.
24
00:02:40,243 --> 00:02:41,267
That's right.
25
00:02:41,344 --> 00:02:44,279
The shame of the family,
the wastrel, the public drunk.
26
00:02:44,347 --> 00:02:46,542
You say that as if it's a bad thing.
27
00:02:48,985 --> 00:02:52,477
Your window's going up.
Something's gone wrong with it.
28
00:03:08,504 --> 00:03:10,028
Goodness gracious me.
29
00:03:11,441 --> 00:03:14,604
Here, hi.
30
00:03:16,512 --> 00:03:18,036
Hello in there.
31
00:03:18,114 --> 00:03:20,241
Hi, it's me.
32
00:03:20,316 --> 00:03:24,116
You have to be the most annoying man
l have ever met.
33
00:03:24,621 --> 00:03:29,149
Do l have to? Here, no.
34
00:03:29,225 --> 00:03:32,456
No don't, you. lt's all right.
l was just having some fun.
35
00:03:32,729 --> 00:03:35,493
Fun is a luxury l don't have.
36
00:03:35,565 --> 00:03:37,658
l work for a living, Bach.
37
00:03:37,734 --> 00:03:40,794
The word is ''work.'' Look it up.
38
00:03:41,905 --> 00:03:44,806
-And my sympathy to your father.
-Yeah, certainly.
39
00:03:44,874 --> 00:03:47,138
My congratulations to your mother.
40
00:04:37,727 --> 00:04:39,354
Home at last.
41
00:04:39,429 --> 00:04:41,363
Hi. How are you? Nice to see you.
42
00:04:41,431 --> 00:04:43,365
Merry Christmas, yes.
43
00:04:43,433 --> 00:04:44,957
Good evening, Mr. Bach.
44
00:04:45,034 --> 00:04:48,765
How are you, Philip? Lovely stuff.
Thank you.
45
00:04:50,807 --> 00:04:52,365
Put it on his tab.
46
00:04:56,212 --> 00:04:59,443
-Your regular, sir?
-Yes, l am, thank you for asking.
47
00:04:59,515 --> 00:05:02,211
Very kind of you, very considerate of you.
48
00:05:03,019 --> 00:05:05,419
Good evening, yes. Hi.
49
00:05:07,523 --> 00:05:10,549
-Good evening, Mr. Bach.
-Andre, my man, put it there.
50
00:05:12,628 --> 00:05:14,926
Your wife's been waiting for you, sir.
51
00:05:16,632 --> 00:05:18,293
Yeah, l know, l'm late.
52
00:05:18,368 --> 00:05:21,462
You'd better go on ahead
and remove all the knives from our table.
53
00:05:21,537 --> 00:05:25,029
-l don't think that will be necessary, sir.
-l wouldn't be so sure.
54
00:05:28,945 --> 00:05:31,505
Darling, l'm sorry l'm late.
lt was Bitterman's fault.
55
00:05:31,581 --> 00:05:34,778
He insisted we stop off
at this tawdry boutique and buy--
56
00:05:34,851 --> 00:05:36,648
Prince Charming? Over here.
57
00:05:37,253 --> 00:05:40,518
l think l have more chance
of being forgiven at this table.
58
00:05:42,725 --> 00:05:45,159
Maybe not. Excuse me.
59
00:05:45,895 --> 00:05:47,692
l'm sorry. Merry Christmas.
60
00:05:49,966 --> 00:05:52,764
-Thank you, Andre.
-Thank you, Andre.
61
00:05:52,869 --> 00:05:55,531
Would you like to have
an ambulance standing by?
62
00:05:55,605 --> 00:05:58,472
Arthur, l said 7:00.
63
00:05:59,175 --> 00:06:02,542
7:00! l'm sorry. l thought you said
have a few drinks...
64
00:06:02,612 --> 00:06:05,672
hit a toy store,
and wander in whenever you feel like it.
65
00:06:05,748 --> 00:06:08,410
You really think you're hysterical,
don't you?
66
00:06:08,484 --> 00:06:11,783
Yeah, l do. lt cuts down
on entertainment expenses.
67
00:06:12,789 --> 00:06:14,279
-Kissy kissy.
-No.
68
00:06:18,628 --> 00:06:21,756
All right. Why can't l stay mad at you?
69
00:06:22,131 --> 00:06:24,656
l mean, you know something,
we'd have terrific fights.
70
00:06:24,734 --> 00:06:27,965
You know something? l should have
married you for your money.
71
00:06:28,037 --> 00:06:31,404
Yeah, l love myself
primarily for my money.
72
00:06:31,474 --> 00:06:34,034
lt's pathetic, really, but l do.
73
00:06:34,811 --> 00:06:36,676
And l'm probably wasting my time.
74
00:06:36,746 --> 00:06:39,146
l'm probably not even
mentioned in my will.
75
00:06:40,883 --> 00:06:42,680
-How are you?
-l'm fine.
76
00:06:42,752 --> 00:06:44,310
-Yeah?
-Yeah.
77
00:06:44,387 --> 00:06:46,981
Listen, l saw Dr. Holbrook today.
78
00:06:48,491 --> 00:06:51,983
-lt was today? l could have gone with you.
-No, honey, it didn't matter.
79
00:06:52,061 --> 00:06:54,291
l mean, he just had the results
of the tests back.
80
00:06:54,363 --> 00:06:57,230
-What did he say?
-He said, ''Have a seat.''
81
00:06:57,867 --> 00:07:00,461
He said he was putting
new carpeting in his office.
82
00:07:00,536 --> 00:07:01,798
And then what?
83
00:07:02,638 --> 00:07:04,902
And he said l couldn't have children.
84
00:07:18,287 --> 00:07:20,380
God, that sucks, Linda.
85
00:07:20,456 --> 00:07:22,947
l mean, you would have made
a great mother.
86
00:07:24,093 --> 00:07:27,153
Yeah, l know.
l've had so much practice with you.
87
00:07:27,964 --> 00:07:30,455
At least we don't
have to have sex anymore.
88
00:07:34,237 --> 00:07:35,670
Are you cute?
89
00:07:37,807 --> 00:07:39,206
You want to dance?
90
00:07:39,976 --> 00:07:42,035
As long as it's not too arousing.
91
00:07:44,080 --> 00:07:46,412
-We'll be right back.
-Easy, Romeo.
92
00:07:46,482 --> 00:07:48,950
Happy person, let's hang her on the tree.
93
00:07:57,927 --> 00:08:00,259
A one, a two...
94
00:08:00,930 --> 00:08:02,955
a gootchi, gootchi, goo.
95
00:08:04,433 --> 00:08:06,731
A one, a two.
96
00:08:12,175 --> 00:08:15,667
-Arthur.
-Linda, where have you gone?
97
00:08:17,947 --> 00:08:18,971
Honey.
98
00:08:20,683 --> 00:08:24,813
-How do you feel about adoption?
-Adoption?
99
00:08:26,055 --> 00:08:28,956
Yeah, adoption.
100
00:08:29,025 --> 00:08:32,358
Look, all you need are two mature people
who love each other very much.
101
00:08:32,428 --> 00:08:33,895
And we could hire them.
102
00:08:35,331 --> 00:08:37,231
Arthur, wait a minute.
103
00:08:37,900 --> 00:08:40,494
l need you serious for a minute, honey.
104
00:08:40,570 --> 00:08:43,733
Look, l know having a kid
doesn't mean much to you right now...
105
00:08:43,806 --> 00:08:47,936
but it's all l've ever thought about
for the last three years.
106
00:08:48,878 --> 00:08:51,642
Arthur, every time l pass a playground,
l just die.
107
00:08:51,714 --> 00:08:52,942
Then we adopt.
108
00:08:53,015 --> 00:08:54,880
-What?
-Yeah.
109
00:08:54,951 --> 00:08:56,919
-Just like that?
-Yeah.
110
00:08:56,986 --> 00:08:59,216
Don't you want
to think about it a little bit?
111
00:08:59,288 --> 00:09:01,085
No, set up the appointment.
112
00:09:01,157 --> 00:09:04,251
l mean, any kid would be lucky
to have you as a mother.
113
00:09:04,360 --> 00:09:06,988
Arthur, thank you.
114
00:09:08,764 --> 00:09:09,890
Honey.
115
00:09:13,502 --> 00:09:14,730
There we are.
116
00:09:16,872 --> 00:09:19,306
Blimey, you can stop it.
117
00:09:19,375 --> 00:09:21,866
Thank you, l love you.
118
00:09:24,313 --> 00:09:26,008
l am so excited...
119
00:09:26,282 --> 00:09:27,613
and l love you so much.
120
00:09:27,683 --> 00:09:30,049
l love you so much, it hurts.
121
00:09:30,119 --> 00:09:32,383
That's because you're leaning on my fork.
122
00:09:32,455 --> 00:09:34,514
l know, take it away immediately.
123
00:09:34,590 --> 00:09:37,252
Arthur, you know
what l'm going to do tomorrow morning?
124
00:09:37,326 --> 00:09:40,227
Here, look what l found
in this new novelty store...
125
00:09:40,296 --> 00:09:41,763
l found in Times Square.
126
00:09:41,831 --> 00:09:44,994
What? These l don't need.
l could always see right through you.
127
00:09:45,067 --> 00:09:47,365
l'm gonna
.... What is that?
128
00:09:47,436 --> 00:09:50,997
Phony throw-up. We'll get a free meal here
if it's the last thing we do.
129
00:09:51,073 --> 00:09:54,065
-Arthur.
-Now wait a minute, l have plans for that.
130
00:09:54,143 --> 00:09:57,408
What? Trick soap? No. Fairchild?
131
00:09:58,147 --> 00:10:00,775
Arthur, haven't you tortured
that poor man enough?
132
00:10:00,850 --> 00:10:02,477
No, definitely not.
133
00:10:04,186 --> 00:10:05,483
-Andre!
-Andre.
134
00:10:05,688 --> 00:10:07,679
This your idea of a joke?
135
00:10:07,757 --> 00:10:11,454
Don't touch the Barfellini Bolognese. lt's
....
136
00:10:34,650 --> 00:10:36,413
Good morning, sir.
137
00:10:37,987 --> 00:10:41,252
-Good morning, Fairchild.
-Good morning, Mr. Bach.
138
00:10:41,324 --> 00:10:45,021
-Good morning, Ted.
-Here is your tea, sir...
139
00:10:45,194 --> 00:10:49,062
your fresh orange juice,
your dish of aspirin...
140
00:10:49,131 --> 00:10:51,759
and of course, your newspaper.
141
00:10:52,435 --> 00:10:55,131
Fairchild, what happened to your hands?
142
00:10:57,006 --> 00:10:58,871
The soap in my bathroom, sir.
143
00:10:59,542 --> 00:11:01,976
The soap in your bathroom, Fairchild?
144
00:11:02,678 --> 00:11:05,238
Yes, it seems to be malfunctioning.
145
00:11:08,684 --> 00:11:12,347
Fairchild, it's a joke.
Soap doesn't malfunction.
146
00:11:12,421 --> 00:11:16,050
-lt's trick soap.
-l see. Thank you, sir.
147
00:11:16,926 --> 00:11:18,655
You're welcome, Fairchild.
148
00:11:20,162 --> 00:11:21,789
Shall l throw the soap out...
149
00:11:21,864 --> 00:11:24,162
or will you be tricking me again
with it later?
150
00:11:24,233 --> 00:11:27,669
Blimey! Questions this early
in the morning.
151
00:11:28,204 --> 00:11:30,172
Trick soap out or in?
152
00:11:30,940 --> 00:11:33,306
-Forget it, Fairchild.
-Yes, sir.
153
00:11:33,676 --> 00:11:37,635
-Where's Mrs. Bach? ls she
....
-Madam awoke early.
154
00:11:37,713 --> 00:11:39,544
She had some phone calls to make.
155
00:11:40,116 --> 00:11:43,381
ln that case,
put on one of her nightgowns...
156
00:11:43,452 --> 00:11:45,386
and come in here, would you?
157
00:11:48,524 --> 00:11:49,582
Sir?
158
00:11:50,993 --> 00:11:52,961
Come on, Fairchild.
159
00:11:53,229 --> 00:11:54,696
l know you want it.
160
00:11:56,532 --> 00:11:58,659
l've seen the way you look at me.
161
00:12:04,140 --> 00:12:07,166
Fairchild! l'm kidding.
162
00:12:07,543 --> 00:12:09,773
God, it's the truth.
163
00:12:10,212 --> 00:12:12,942
Don't they ever kid each other
on your planet?
164
00:12:13,015 --> 00:12:14,915
-On my planet, sir?
-Yeah.
165
00:12:15,050 --> 00:12:17,678
l mean, don't l drive you nuts?
166
00:12:17,753 --> 00:12:20,313
Don't you want to pick up
one of these chairs here...
167
00:12:20,389 --> 00:12:22,254
and whack me over the head with it?
168
00:12:22,324 --> 00:12:25,384
-Whack you, sir? l could never.
-l give you permission.
169
00:12:26,028 --> 00:12:29,657
Listen, l used to have a butler
who would take my hat off all the time...
170
00:12:29,732 --> 00:12:32,701
and hit me over the head with it
and call me a little shit!
171
00:12:32,768 --> 00:12:35,601
We must have gone
to different butlering schools, sir.
172
00:12:35,671 --> 00:12:38,765
Yeah, maybe. He was
more than a butler, actually.
173
00:12:38,841 --> 00:12:40,638
He was my friend, you know?
174
00:12:42,845 --> 00:12:44,710
He was more than that, really.
175
00:12:44,780 --> 00:12:47,715
Yes, Hobson. l've heard you two
were very close.
176
00:12:47,783 --> 00:12:49,512
Yeah, we were.
177
00:12:52,221 --> 00:12:54,121
And you know what, Fairchild?
178
00:12:55,591 --> 00:12:59,425
You remind me of him
in absolutely no way whatsoever.
179
00:13:03,232 --> 00:13:07,134
Loosen up, Fairchild, l give you
permission to enjoy your life.
180
00:13:07,603 --> 00:13:09,798
Thank you, sir. l shall try.
181
00:13:09,872 --> 00:13:11,362
You're very welcome.
182
00:13:14,443 --> 00:13:16,308
Now it's time for my bath.
183
00:13:19,982 --> 00:13:21,711
Yeah, take that, Godzilla.
184
00:13:23,919 --> 00:13:27,411
l guess you'd say
185
00:13:28,190 --> 00:13:31,023
What can make me feel this way?
186
00:13:31,193 --> 00:13:35,129
Myself, myself, myself
187
00:13:35,197 --> 00:13:39,031
Talking about myself, myself
188
00:13:39,101 --> 00:13:41,160
Go get him, sub!
189
00:13:41,237 --> 00:13:42,568
Get that wreck!
190
00:13:44,373 --> 00:13:46,170
Okay, basketball time.
191
00:13:49,378 --> 00:13:50,538
Here we go.
192
00:13:53,215 --> 00:13:54,682
Hip hooray, sir.
193
00:13:57,853 --> 00:14:01,619
Aren't baths the best thing ever, Fairchild?
194
00:14:02,658 --> 00:14:04,751
lmagine a world without bathtubs.
195
00:14:05,594 --> 00:14:08,654
l mean, for one thing,
this floor would be soaking wet.
196
00:14:09,999 --> 00:14:11,990
What do they call you, Mr. Charisma?
197
00:14:12,067 --> 00:14:13,728
Are you alone?
198
00:14:14,370 --> 00:14:18,363
Alone? l am as alone as a person can be...
199
00:14:18,440 --> 00:14:20,908
without actually technically being alone.
200
00:14:21,243 --> 00:14:23,575
-Hi, Fairchild.
-Madam.
201
00:14:24,246 --> 00:14:25,907
Why don't you come on in?
202
00:14:25,981 --> 00:14:29,109
l'm naked, l'm horizontal,
l am covered with bubbles.
203
00:14:29,251 --> 00:14:32,846
So most of your work is already done.
204
00:14:33,188 --> 00:14:34,780
Sorry, stud, no time.
205
00:14:35,391 --> 00:14:38,622
-l'm making a list of adoption agencies.
-How are you doing?
206
00:14:38,694 --> 00:14:39,956
So far, not so good.
207
00:14:40,029 --> 00:14:42,725
Everyone l've talked to
insists on meeting you.
208
00:14:43,265 --> 00:14:45,563
l love you, Mrs. Bach, don't ever die.
209
00:14:48,270 --> 00:14:49,669
Where's your snake?
210
00:14:49,738 --> 00:14:53,105
My snake? He's very well this morning,
but he was very naughty.
211
00:14:53,175 --> 00:14:56,042
l had to put him underwater
for an hour and a half.
212
00:14:57,179 --> 00:14:59,875
Arthur, have you been
thinking about names?
213
00:14:59,949 --> 00:15:03,680
Names? He wants a name, too?
214
00:15:03,752 --> 00:15:05,515
The spoiled little brat.
215
00:15:05,588 --> 00:15:08,853
What about Senator? Senator Bach?
216
00:15:08,924 --> 00:15:12,826
Sort of give the kid a head start.
Fairchild, Senator Bach.
217
00:15:12,895 --> 00:15:15,762
-You hear that one?
-Yes, sir, a head start.
218
00:15:16,131 --> 00:15:18,292
Right. Get the snake out.
219
00:15:18,367 --> 00:15:21,666
l almost forgot. Your father called,
he wants to see you this morning.
220
00:15:21,737 --> 00:15:23,637
My father?
Must have been a wrong number.
221
00:15:23,706 --> 00:15:26,402
-No, he said it was important. Fairchild.
-Madam.
222
00:15:26,475 --> 00:15:29,706
l'm leaving it in your hands.
You make sure that he gets there.
223
00:15:29,778 --> 00:15:31,006
Nice gloves.
224
00:15:32,715 --> 00:15:35,878
-Fairchild, what are you waiting for?
-l don't know, sir.
225
00:15:37,486 --> 00:15:40,819
l'm going to see my father.
What does that mean?
226
00:15:40,889 --> 00:15:42,356
A drink, sir.
227
00:15:42,424 --> 00:15:44,449
Please!
228
00:15:54,970 --> 00:15:57,461
Yeah, hello, my beauty.
229
00:16:01,877 --> 00:16:02,969
Hi, Dad.
230
00:16:10,386 --> 00:16:13,844
-May l help you?
-Yeah, l've come to see my father...
231
00:16:13,922 --> 00:16:16,948
but if he's too busy, l'll be glad to leave
and never come back.
232
00:16:17,026 --> 00:16:21,156
-...before l leave for Madrid on Tuesday.
-Yeah, Wednesday would be too late.
233
00:16:21,230 --> 00:16:23,221
Arthur, you're here.
234
00:16:23,999 --> 00:16:26,490
Craig Powell, this is my
....
235
00:16:26,568 --> 00:16:28,798
My son. l'm his son.
236
00:16:28,971 --> 00:16:33,305
-Yes. l've heard a lot about you.
-l'm afraid most of it is true.
237
00:16:34,443 --> 00:16:37,537
-Have a good trip.
-Bye-bye.
238
00:16:37,613 --> 00:16:41,071
Come on in, Arthur,
this won't take a minute.
239
00:16:44,920 --> 00:16:46,285
Right in here.
240
00:16:47,956 --> 00:16:49,389
God, blimey.
241
00:16:49,458 --> 00:16:52,359
That Craig Powell bloke's
got the smallest toupee...
242
00:16:52,428 --> 00:16:54,259
l've ever seen in my life.
243
00:16:54,329 --> 00:16:56,729
-You're drunk.
-On the contrary.
244
00:16:56,799 --> 00:16:59,563
l've never been more intoxicated
in my life.
245
00:16:59,635 --> 00:17:03,332
How does he keep his head
on the pillow at night, l ask you?
246
00:17:04,406 --> 00:17:06,670
-You'll never change, will you?
-No.
247
00:17:06,742 --> 00:17:10,143
l heard you accosted Kendall Winchester
in the park yesterday.
248
00:17:10,212 --> 00:17:13,511
Yeah, good old K.W.W.
249
00:17:14,283 --> 00:17:15,409
W.
250
00:17:15,484 --> 00:17:18,453
You think the whole world is here
for your amusement.
251
00:17:18,620 --> 00:17:22,647
Yes, l do, and you're doing a splendid job.
252
00:17:22,758 --> 00:17:24,191
Thank you very much indeed.
253
00:17:24,259 --> 00:17:26,784
There's some papers here
you need to sign.
254
00:17:29,465 --> 00:17:31,626
My God, you've been busy.
255
00:17:31,700 --> 00:17:34,794
We're merging, Arthur.
lt's a very big move.
256
00:17:34,870 --> 00:17:37,168
This time next week, we'll be one half...
257
00:17:37,239 --> 00:17:39,935
of the third largest conglomerate
in the world.
258
00:17:40,008 --> 00:17:43,705
lt's about time. l've been saying this
for years, you know.
259
00:17:43,979 --> 00:17:46,709
-Sign here, there are four copies.
-Okay.
260
00:17:46,815 --> 00:17:49,283
lt's all very involved.
You wouldn't understand.
261
00:17:49,351 --> 00:17:51,444
l'm not 8 years old, Father.
262
00:17:54,690 --> 00:17:58,649
How do you make an ''A''?
lt's all right, l remember.
263
00:17:58,727 --> 00:18:01,218
-Who are we merging with?
-Burt Johnson.
264
00:18:01,964 --> 00:18:05,525
-Burt Johnson? But he's a maniac!
-He's not a maniac, Arthur.
265
00:18:05,601 --> 00:18:09,628
-He's maniacish. He tried to kill me.
-Not without reason.
266
00:18:09,738 --> 00:18:13,697
You left his daughter standing at the altar.
You humiliated him, Arthur.
267
00:18:13,776 --> 00:18:15,368
l didn't love Susan.
268
00:18:15,811 --> 00:18:18,575
When l told him,
he came at me with a knife.
269
00:18:26,021 --> 00:18:28,990
They don't make pens
like they used to, do they, Dad?
270
00:18:30,726 --> 00:18:35,390
-Do be careful with this one.
-Yeah, right.
271
00:18:36,064 --> 00:18:37,998
lt was Mother's, wasn't it?
272
00:18:38,167 --> 00:18:41,261
Yeah. Bless her cotton socks.
273
00:18:43,105 --> 00:18:46,632
Tristan, remember to put stickers
on all the paintings that have been sold...
274
00:18:46,708 --> 00:18:49,006
and buy two more cases of champagne.
275
00:18:49,077 --> 00:18:50,704
But make sure it's domestic.
276
00:18:50,779 --> 00:18:52,872
A lot of freeloaders
come to these openings.
277
00:18:52,948 --> 00:18:55,849
Ask Miriam to get enough hangers
for the front entrance.
278
00:18:55,918 --> 00:18:57,476
And whatever you do...
279
00:18:57,553 --> 00:19:00,181
don't turn away members of the press
like last time.
280
00:19:01,323 --> 00:19:03,917
-Marcia !
-Hi, Susan.
281
00:19:03,992 --> 00:19:06,324
-l'm so glad you could come.
-Me, too.
282
00:19:06,395 --> 00:19:08,420
This Elizabeth Murray is fantastic.
283
00:19:08,497 --> 00:19:10,658
The colors are brilliant, aren't they?
284
00:19:10,732 --> 00:19:14,566
l've got to show you
the Hans Hofman we just got, it's divine.
285
00:19:15,304 --> 00:19:17,932
Painted in 1942, Provincetown series.
286
00:19:18,006 --> 00:19:20,474
-Look at that movement.
-Very interesting.
287
00:19:20,542 --> 00:19:24,205
Should l put a little reserve on that
for you? Take a look around...
288
00:19:24,279 --> 00:19:26,975
there's much to see,
and let me know if l can help you.
289
00:19:27,049 --> 00:19:28,414
-Thank you.
-Okay.
290
00:19:31,453 --> 00:19:35,617
-Daddy!
-My sunshine girl.
291
00:19:35,691 --> 00:19:39,149
What a surprise.
You never come down here.
292
00:19:39,494 --> 00:19:41,860
-You know what this place could use?
-What?
293
00:19:41,930 --> 00:19:44,398
Some John Audubon paintings.
Ever heard of him?
294
00:19:44,466 --> 00:19:46,900
He's a naturalist, he paints birds.
295
00:19:47,569 --> 00:19:49,969
Don't laugh.
296
00:19:50,539 --> 00:19:54,498
People love birds.
People love to look at birds.
297
00:19:54,776 --> 00:19:57,745
People don't want to look at this.
This is not right.
298
00:19:57,880 --> 00:19:59,677
We don't want that kind of stuff...
299
00:19:59,815 --> 00:20:01,612
-in our gallery. Right.
-ln our gallery.
300
00:20:01,683 --> 00:20:04,743
ls that why you dropped by,
to critique the collection?
301
00:20:04,920 --> 00:20:09,050
No. Actually, l have
some news for you about Arthur.
302
00:20:10,692 --> 00:20:13,354
-Divorce?
-No.
303
00:20:13,829 --> 00:20:15,558
-They're separated?
-No.
304
00:20:16,565 --> 00:20:18,260
Did he kill her?
305
00:20:18,333 --> 00:20:20,130
That's my girl. Come on.
306
00:20:21,970 --> 00:20:24,438
Susan, you remember that day...
307
00:20:24,506 --> 00:20:26,269
four years ago at the church?
308
00:20:26,341 --> 00:20:29,469
-Yes.
-And you remember l said...
309
00:20:29,544 --> 00:20:31,910
somehow, some way,
l'd make things right?
310
00:20:32,915 --> 00:20:35,008
What have you done, Daddy?
311
00:20:35,417 --> 00:20:38,079
l've gone into business
with Stanford Bach...
312
00:20:38,153 --> 00:20:40,587
only, Bach made a big mistake.
313
00:20:40,722 --> 00:20:42,019
He used my lawyer.
314
00:20:42,090 --> 00:20:44,718
That's like inviting me
into a high-stakes poker game...
315
00:20:44,793 --> 00:20:46,260
and letting me deal.
316
00:20:46,328 --> 00:20:48,387
By this time next week...
317
00:20:48,463 --> 00:20:51,660
Arthur will be
seriously reappraising his situation.
318
00:20:52,501 --> 00:20:56,631
l thought after a few months with her,
that he'd get her out of his system.
319
00:20:56,705 --> 00:20:59,435
l didn't want to get him back like this.
320
00:20:59,808 --> 00:21:01,036
But you'll take him.
321
00:21:01,109 --> 00:21:04,169
Of course l'll take him. Thank you, Daddy.
322
00:21:05,380 --> 00:21:06,938
That's my girl.
323
00:21:08,383 --> 00:21:10,851
Thank you very much
for coming in, Mrs. Todd.
324
00:21:10,919 --> 00:21:13,149
l'll call you as soon as l hear anything.
325
00:21:13,221 --> 00:21:15,587
Thanks. Bye, Dr. Todd.
326
00:21:15,657 --> 00:21:17,352
-Mr. and Mrs. Bach?
-Yes.
327
00:21:17,426 --> 00:21:19,587
-Hi. Cynthia Canby.
-How do you do?
328
00:21:19,661 --> 00:21:22,596
lt's nice to meet you
after talking to you on the phone.
329
00:21:22,664 --> 00:21:24,564
Please call me Linda. This is Arthur.
330
00:21:24,633 --> 00:21:28,069
-Hi, how are you?
-And Fairchild, our butler.
331
00:21:29,171 --> 00:21:31,469
-How do you do?
-Very well, thank you.
332
00:21:33,275 --> 00:21:35,300
-Come on in.
-All right.
333
00:21:36,845 --> 00:21:39,336
-Shall l wait here, sir?
-No, there.
334
00:21:41,383 --> 00:21:42,645
This is nice.
335
00:21:42,718 --> 00:21:44,583
l've never met a real-life butler before.
336
00:21:44,653 --> 00:21:46,814
Yeah, he shakes hands great.
l taught him that.
337
00:21:46,888 --> 00:21:48,822
Actually, l do
most of the housework myself.
338
00:21:48,924 --> 00:21:51,688
l just use him to reach the higher shelves.
339
00:21:57,232 --> 00:21:59,700
Who do you like better so far,
me or Linda?
340
00:21:59,768 --> 00:22:00,757
Honey!
341
00:22:01,103 --> 00:22:04,197
-Why don't you sit down?
-Okay, just a minute, darling.
342
00:22:04,373 --> 00:22:08,503
Let me just test these out.
You'd better sit here, darling.
343
00:22:08,577 --> 00:22:12,445
This looks a tad more comfortable.
l'll take this less comfortable chair.
344
00:22:12,514 --> 00:22:14,505
That's the kind of guy l am.
345
00:22:14,583 --> 00:22:17,245
l'll make a note. Passes chair test.
346
00:22:17,652 --> 00:22:20,314
Mrs. Canby, did you help
all of these people?
347
00:22:20,389 --> 00:22:23,415
l've got the best job in the whole world.
l make families.
348
00:22:24,059 --> 00:22:26,027
-They're all smiling.
-Yeah.
349
00:22:26,094 --> 00:22:27,857
l guess babies do that to people.
350
00:22:27,929 --> 00:22:31,160
What l'd like to do is put a picture
of you and Arthur on that wall.
351
00:22:31,233 --> 00:22:33,667
Mrs. Canby, if you could do that...
352
00:22:33,735 --> 00:22:35,760
you would make me
....
You would make us...
353
00:22:35,837 --> 00:22:38,203
the happiest people in the whole world.
354
00:22:38,306 --> 00:22:40,467
Now l've been going through your file.
355
00:22:40,542 --> 00:22:42,806
We've collected some information
about you.
356
00:22:42,878 --> 00:22:45,608
But l just wanted to ask you
a couple of things.
357
00:22:45,881 --> 00:22:48,543
ls it true that you own five houses?
358
00:22:48,617 --> 00:22:49,777
-No way.
-No.
359
00:22:49,851 --> 00:22:52,342
-No, six, actually.
-What do you mean, six?
360
00:22:52,421 --> 00:22:55,913
-What about the one in Saint-Tropez?
-What? That's a shack, Arthur.
361
00:22:55,991 --> 00:22:57,481
That's not a house.
362
00:22:57,559 --> 00:22:59,584
Well, forget the baby, adopt me.
363
00:23:01,430 --> 00:23:04,297
Raising a happy child
has nothing to do with money.
364
00:23:04,599 --> 00:23:07,261
-Yeah.
-You can say that again.
365
00:23:07,469 --> 00:23:10,370
Now, there's been quite a bit
about you in the press.
366
00:23:10,472 --> 00:23:12,963
There's mention here
of a drinking problem.
367
00:23:13,475 --> 00:23:15,272
Now wait a minute.
368
00:23:15,343 --> 00:23:18,506
Linda might enjoy an occasional glass
of wine, but to suggest...
369
00:23:18,580 --> 00:23:21,845
-there's a drinking problem
....
-Arthur, l was talking about you.
370
00:23:21,917 --> 00:23:25,751
Mrs. Canby, he never drives.
l make sure he doesn't ever drive.
371
00:23:25,921 --> 00:23:28,219
And last year,
he joined Alcoholics Anonymous.
372
00:23:28,290 --> 00:23:29,279
l see.
373
00:23:29,357 --> 00:23:32,292
-How many meetings did you attend?
-Meetings?
374
00:23:33,228 --> 00:23:37,665
l guess l didn't read the entire pamphlet.
375
00:23:37,732 --> 00:23:41,065
l've never done that in my entire life.
l swear l'm not a kicker.
376
00:23:41,136 --> 00:23:43,696
lt's all right.
lf you hadn't kicked him, l would have.
377
00:23:43,772 --> 00:23:46,798
We take drinking problems
very seriously around here.
378
00:23:47,509 --> 00:23:50,069
Look, Mrs. Canby,
l know we're not perfect.
379
00:23:50,145 --> 00:23:53,410
No, we're not. For example,
l've only got one good leg.
380
00:23:53,515 --> 00:23:56,006
But Arthur and l,
we're the happiest couple l know.
381
00:23:56,084 --> 00:23:58,917
And it's not the money.
l just know it's not. lt's us.
382
00:23:58,987 --> 00:24:01,012
l mean, we laugh all the time...
383
00:24:01,289 --> 00:24:04,747
and l hardly ever kick him,
and he hardly ever kicks me.
384
00:24:05,327 --> 00:24:07,454
lt just seems like without a baby...
385
00:24:07,529 --> 00:24:10,020
something really wonderful
is being wasted.
386
00:24:13,235 --> 00:24:15,066
l'll see what l can do.
387
00:24:15,570 --> 00:24:17,595
-That's it?
-That's it.
388
00:24:17,706 --> 00:24:19,765
l'm gonna be visiting
your home sometime.
389
00:24:19,841 --> 00:24:22,275
-What about tomorrow?
-l can't tell you when.
390
00:24:22,344 --> 00:24:25,780
The idea is to catch you by surprise,
to see how you really live.
391
00:24:25,847 --> 00:24:27,610
Any day's good except Tuesdays...
392
00:24:27,682 --> 00:24:30,378
'cause that's when we're out
robbing gas stations.
393
00:24:30,452 --> 00:24:34,286
-Don't worry about a thing, it'll be fine.
-Nice meeting you, Mrs. Canby.
394
00:24:34,356 --> 00:24:37,257
-Yes, you, too. l'll be in touch.
-Okay. Bye.
395
00:24:38,460 --> 00:24:40,087
l thought it went very well.
396
00:24:40,162 --> 00:24:41,595
-Yeah.
-Yeah?
397
00:24:42,964 --> 00:24:46,263
l'll meet you in the car, okay?
l just want to ask her something.
398
00:24:47,402 --> 00:24:48,733
You moved.
399
00:24:55,677 --> 00:24:56,735
Look, Mrs. Canby...
400
00:24:56,811 --> 00:24:59,644
you've heard the expression,
''He's just a kidder.''
401
00:24:59,915 --> 00:25:01,849
He is, he's just a kidder.
402
00:25:02,350 --> 00:25:05,717
He'd do anything to make you laugh
and make you comfortable.
403
00:25:05,787 --> 00:25:09,518
He'd do anything to make you happy.
Do you think we have a chance?
404
00:25:09,591 --> 00:25:11,855
l think you have an excellent chance.
405
00:25:12,961 --> 00:25:15,191
You know, he'll make a wonderful father.
406
00:25:15,263 --> 00:25:18,357
l'm sure he will,
but you've got to be realistic.
407
00:25:19,034 --> 00:25:22,800
Adopting a baby can take months,
even years.
408
00:25:23,905 --> 00:25:26,635
l wouldn't go shopping
for highchairs just yet.
409
00:25:29,511 --> 00:25:32,207
l don't know, l like them all. They're
....
410
00:25:32,948 --> 00:25:34,438
Look how cute this is.
411
00:25:34,516 --> 00:25:37,451
-You must have a great time working here.
-l do.
412
00:25:37,519 --> 00:25:41,319
l'm going to take this one, definitely.
l still like this one the best.
413
00:25:41,990 --> 00:25:44,390
lt's great up here.
414
00:25:44,693 --> 00:25:48,561
-Kid will love this, right, Fairchild?
-l suppose he must, sir.
415
00:25:48,630 --> 00:25:52,157
Yeah. How you do this
with such dignity baffles me.
416
00:25:52,234 --> 00:25:53,292
Thank you, sir.
417
00:25:53,368 --> 00:25:55,268
-Here.
-lt's all right, sir.
418
00:25:55,337 --> 00:25:56,770
Now don't fool around, Fairchild.
419
00:25:56,838 --> 00:25:58,271
-We haven't got all day.
-Yes, sir.
420
00:25:58,740 --> 00:26:00,367
Look at how delicate this is.
421
00:26:00,442 --> 00:26:04,344
This is great. Look at that workmanship.
422
00:26:04,412 --> 00:26:05,538
l'm gonna take this one.
423
00:26:05,614 --> 00:26:09,243
Yes, Mrs. Bach.
May l ask, when is the baby due?
424
00:26:09,351 --> 00:26:13,117
What baby? This is for me.
l'm having trouble sleeping.
425
00:26:15,390 --> 00:26:17,381
This is great!
426
00:26:17,559 --> 00:26:19,618
-Fairchild.
-Madam?
427
00:26:19,694 --> 00:26:21,958
Did you show that to Arthur?
Does he like it?
428
00:26:22,030 --> 00:26:23,497
Yes, he wants it.
429
00:26:23,565 --> 00:26:24,623
Good.
430
00:26:24,699 --> 00:26:25,757
Fairchild!
431
00:26:27,235 --> 00:26:30,204
Look, Fairchild! l'm finally on the wagon!
432
00:26:31,506 --> 00:26:35,101
-l'll take these to the car.
-No, that's okay. l'll take it.
433
00:26:38,380 --> 00:26:40,610
Do they make these with a wet bar
and a back seat?
434
00:26:40,682 --> 00:26:41,740
No, sir.
435
00:26:41,816 --> 00:26:44,979
We'll take it anyway.
The kid will just have to rough it.
436
00:26:47,022 --> 00:26:50,321
l know this is hard to believe,
but he's never once been mistaken...
437
00:26:50,392 --> 00:26:51,586
for a Supreme Court justice.
438
00:26:51,660 --> 00:26:54,993
-There was one occasion when l--
-Are we taking this? Wanna hold this?
439
00:26:55,063 --> 00:26:57,293
-Thank you.
-Hold on.
440
00:26:57,766 --> 00:27:01,600
-Red light! Green light!
-Arthur.
441
00:27:01,670 --> 00:27:03,865
So how did you two meet?
442
00:27:03,972 --> 00:27:07,908
At Bergdorf Goodman. l was shoplifting.
443
00:27:08,510 --> 00:27:10,273
No, l'm
....
444
00:27:10,979 --> 00:27:14,779
Sir, there's a call for you
on the car phone. Burt Johnson.
445
00:27:14,849 --> 00:27:16,976
-Burt Johnson?
-Burt Johnson?
446
00:27:27,962 --> 00:27:29,020
Pull!
447
00:27:48,083 --> 00:27:49,812
Hello, Mr. Johnson.
448
00:27:49,884 --> 00:27:52,318
Arthur. Welcome aboard.
449
00:27:52,754 --> 00:27:53,880
Thank you.
450
00:27:56,791 --> 00:27:58,315
You're looking fine.
451
00:27:59,894 --> 00:28:03,489
And by fine, of course,
l mean big and frightening.
452
00:28:04,632 --> 00:28:06,998
l see you're still drinking, Arthur.
453
00:28:07,736 --> 00:28:10,204
Yeah, sir, l'd stop drinking in a minute...
454
00:28:10,271 --> 00:28:13,638
if l could find a faster, more efficient way...
455
00:28:13,708 --> 00:28:16,108
of getting all this Scotch into my body.
456
00:28:17,379 --> 00:28:21,008
How's Susan? Married, l hope.
Twenty-eight children.
457
00:28:21,416 --> 00:28:23,407
Susan's not married.
458
00:28:24,219 --> 00:28:26,244
Susan never got married.
459
00:28:27,222 --> 00:28:29,554
-Really?
-Pull!
460
00:28:32,660 --> 00:28:34,685
You must hate those things.
461
00:28:35,463 --> 00:28:36,987
Would you like to try it?
462
00:28:37,132 --> 00:28:40,624
Me? l don't think l'm
....
463
00:28:40,769 --> 00:28:45,729
Yes, there's nothing like the feel of a fine,
handcrafted shotgun.
464
00:28:47,642 --> 00:28:52,170
-Go ahead, try it.
-Okay. Would you mind?
465
00:28:52,247 --> 00:28:55,580
There's nothing like the feel
of a huge glass of Scotch...
466
00:28:55,650 --> 00:28:56,878
in the left hand.
467
00:28:58,920 --> 00:29:01,684
Pull! Hit the bullet!
468
00:29:02,791 --> 00:29:06,989
He missed. No, your way's better.
469
00:29:07,061 --> 00:29:10,553
l can see that now, thank you.
l'm better at this.
470
00:29:10,665 --> 00:29:12,428
-You hurt me, Arthur.
-l did?
471
00:29:12,500 --> 00:29:15,401
You embarrassed me
in front of the entire community.
472
00:29:15,470 --> 00:29:16,494
l--
473
00:29:16,571 --> 00:29:19,506
Worst of all,
you broke my little girl's heart.
474
00:29:20,175 --> 00:29:22,769
l'm not a vindictive man.
475
00:29:22,844 --> 00:29:26,302
-l'm a very vindictive man.
-l see.
476
00:29:26,915 --> 00:29:30,214
l think l better take
.... No!
477
00:29:33,421 --> 00:29:34,683
Pull!
478
00:29:38,626 --> 00:29:42,357
That one was self-defense, right?
lt was gonna circle back and kill us both.
479
00:29:42,430 --> 00:29:44,762
l'm gonna get another drink now.
480
00:29:44,833 --> 00:29:46,460
What time is it, Arthur?
481
00:29:47,869 --> 00:29:50,394
-What time is it?
-Feel any different?
482
00:29:51,072 --> 00:29:53,870
-Different?
-You should, you know.
483
00:29:54,742 --> 00:29:56,437
You're broke, Arthur.
484
00:29:57,712 --> 00:30:01,079
As of 12:00 noon today, you're busted.
485
00:30:01,549 --> 00:30:02,811
You're shit.
486
00:30:02,884 --> 00:30:05,546
Wait a minute, l'm shit?
487
00:30:05,620 --> 00:30:08,453
-Remember the big merger?
-Yeah.
488
00:30:08,523 --> 00:30:11,890
Your family and l
formed this big corporation...
489
00:30:12,427 --> 00:30:14,520
each of us owning 40% of the stock.
490
00:30:14,596 --> 00:30:18,430
And the remaining 20%
was supposed to be owned...
491
00:30:18,500 --> 00:30:20,525
by a group of foreign investors.
492
00:30:20,668 --> 00:30:22,397
Foreign--
493
00:30:22,470 --> 00:30:26,964
l bought out those investors
earlier this morning.
494
00:30:27,041 --> 00:30:28,440
You bought them out?
495
00:30:28,510 --> 00:30:31,775
lt's called controlling interest, Arthur.
496
00:30:32,881 --> 00:30:35,145
l already talked to your family...
497
00:30:36,684 --> 00:30:39,050
and they can run the company...
498
00:30:39,120 --> 00:30:41,748
live exactly as they have been...
499
00:30:41,823 --> 00:30:43,518
on one condition.
500
00:30:44,826 --> 00:30:47,090
That you are cut off.
501
00:30:47,996 --> 00:30:51,022
-What?
-You don't get a penny.
502
00:30:53,768 --> 00:30:56,328
Can l borrow that gun a moment?
l want to
....
503
00:30:57,171 --> 00:30:59,002
Nope, it's all over.
504
00:31:01,409 --> 00:31:03,468
No more cars, no more yachts.
505
00:31:03,545 --> 00:31:06,810
No more houses. The party is over!
506
00:31:07,649 --> 00:31:09,276
Why are you doing this?
507
00:31:09,951 --> 00:31:13,045
Because you didn't marry Susan!
508
00:31:13,121 --> 00:31:15,282
But lots of people didn't marry Susan.
509
00:31:15,356 --> 00:31:19,087
l mean, that guy over there,
he didn't even take her out to dinner.
510
00:31:19,160 --> 00:31:23,392
-Let's get him and beat the shit out of him.
-Now you can get your money back.
511
00:31:23,598 --> 00:31:27,694
Just get a divorce and marry my little girl.
512
00:31:27,769 --> 00:31:32,001
She still loves you,
although l can't imagine why.
513
00:31:32,807 --> 00:31:35,776
But eventually, you'll come around.
514
00:31:36,077 --> 00:31:38,705
You're soft, you're pathetic.
515
00:31:38,780 --> 00:31:40,680
You wouldn't last 24 hours
without money.
516
00:31:40,748 --> 00:31:42,511
Seriously, why did you want to see me?
517
00:31:42,584 --> 00:31:45,246
No. We're all finished talking.
518
00:31:46,154 --> 00:31:48,019
l'm going back to the yacht club.
519
00:31:49,290 --> 00:31:51,724
You know, l'd ask you to join me...
520
00:31:51,793 --> 00:31:55,729
but there's a $15 cover charge,
and you can't afford it.
521
00:32:13,781 --> 00:32:16,147
Hello! Hi, honey!
522
00:32:16,884 --> 00:32:18,146
We're poor!
523
00:32:20,121 --> 00:32:22,021
We're white trash, Linda !
524
00:32:23,124 --> 00:32:25,024
Linda, we're bankrupt!
525
00:32:25,426 --> 00:32:28,088
Linda, there's a bleak fiscal outlook.
526
00:32:28,262 --> 00:32:29,456
Linda?
527
00:32:33,534 --> 00:32:36,469
Greta, have you seen my wife?
528
00:32:36,738 --> 00:32:40,230
-Destitute woman about this tall.
-Mr. Bach.
529
00:32:40,308 --> 00:32:43,004
l think she's in where they're redecorating.
530
00:32:46,814 --> 00:32:50,750
Hello, darling
.... Sorry, you're too tall.
Hi, darling.
531
00:32:50,818 --> 00:32:53,343
l'm so glad you're home.
This will be so wonderful.
532
00:32:53,421 --> 00:32:56,117
Look, l wanted to wait
before l made a final decision.
533
00:32:56,190 --> 00:32:59,489
-But l'm really leaning towards the peach.
-Yeah, me, too.
534
00:32:59,560 --> 00:33:01,926
lf it's a girl. Now, if it's a boy, look at this.
535
00:33:01,996 --> 00:33:05,363
They're all good, but the robin's egg blue
is the best, don't you think?
536
00:33:05,433 --> 00:33:09,062
l'm gonna put a neutral carpet
and a big picture of Hobson on that wall.
537
00:33:09,137 --> 00:33:11,332
-That'll be nice.
-Arthur, you know something?
538
00:33:11,406 --> 00:33:14,170
You can teach a baby to read
at 8 months old.
539
00:33:14,242 --> 00:33:16,176
Listen to this. All right.
540
00:33:16,411 --> 00:33:18,276
''The period from one to five.''
541
00:33:18,346 --> 00:33:22,282
Hold it. How much will all this cost?
542
00:33:22,350 --> 00:33:25,444
How much?
Arthur, l've never heard you say that.
543
00:33:25,520 --> 00:33:26,919
-You all right?
-No, l'm great.
544
00:33:26,988 --> 00:33:30,788
l've just heard some wonderful news.
We're going to inherit the earth.
545
00:33:30,925 --> 00:33:33,223
Good, dear. l'll get that.
546
00:33:34,662 --> 00:33:36,892
Hello? Yes.
547
00:33:37,365 --> 00:33:40,459
Yeah. Ricky, it's for you. Thank you.
548
00:33:40,535 --> 00:33:44,403
Now, what are you talking about?
Speak English. We're in America.
549
00:33:44,872 --> 00:33:47,966
Okay, but l must insist
you hold your applause till the end.
550
00:33:48,042 --> 00:33:49,100
All right.
551
00:33:49,177 --> 00:33:50,735
-Burt Johnson.
-Burt Johnson?
552
00:33:53,047 --> 00:33:58,041
Burt Johnson has seized control
of my family's company.
553
00:33:59,353 --> 00:34:04,086
He's forcing them to cut me off
until l divorce you and marry Susan.
554
00:34:04,158 --> 00:34:06,285
-What's for dinner?
-Lasagna.
555
00:34:06,427 --> 00:34:09,294
-What do you mean? Can he do that?
-Apparently he has.
556
00:34:09,363 --> 00:34:12,093
Excuse me, Mrs. Bach.
l'm sorry, that was the office.
557
00:34:12,166 --> 00:34:15,499
lt seems as though
there's a problem with your credit.
558
00:34:15,570 --> 00:34:19,438
-l guess he can do that.
-l'm sure it's a mistake.
559
00:34:19,507 --> 00:34:22,533
-Victor, Vincent, let's
....
-l'll call you tomorrow, okay?
560
00:34:22,610 --> 00:34:25,511
-Great.
-Thanks a lot. Thank you. Bye.
561
00:34:25,580 --> 00:34:28,105
Nice boys, l think.
562
00:34:29,217 --> 00:34:31,242
Arthur, this is crazy.
What are we gonna do?
563
00:34:31,319 --> 00:34:33,617
We? No.
564
00:34:33,688 --> 00:34:36,657
Thank you so much. Good-bye.
Do have a nice life.
565
00:34:36,724 --> 00:34:39,386
Susan and l would love
to have you over sometime.
566
00:34:39,460 --> 00:34:40,654
Honey, come here.
567
00:34:40,728 --> 00:34:43,663
Tell me exactly what happened.
l mean, slowly and calmly...
568
00:34:43,731 --> 00:34:45,562
exactly what we're talking about.
569
00:34:45,633 --> 00:34:48,830
l mean, we're talking about our home?
Our cars?
570
00:34:49,303 --> 00:34:53,069
-Not your trust fund?
-Everything.
571
00:34:54,008 --> 00:34:56,272
Everything was in the company's name.
572
00:34:59,113 --> 00:35:01,707
-But you know what the worst thing is?
-What?
573
00:35:03,117 --> 00:35:05,608
l hate lasagna.
574
00:35:08,923 --> 00:35:12,188
Excuse me, l have to lay down.
575
00:35:16,130 --> 00:35:20,863
lt's nice down here. l can understand
why all the little worms come down here.
576
00:35:23,437 --> 00:35:25,234
-Bloody hell.
-Honey?
577
00:35:26,674 --> 00:35:29,234
Think we'll ever look back on this
and laugh?
578
00:35:30,444 --> 00:35:32,412
-No.
-No.
579
00:35:35,750 --> 00:35:37,741
Arthur, what about the baby?
580
00:35:40,388 --> 00:35:43,880
Mrs. Canby said
that the money doesn't matter.
581
00:35:43,958 --> 00:35:45,892
Yeah. She did, didn't she?
582
00:35:45,960 --> 00:35:48,428
-Yeah.
-l guess that's true.
583
00:35:48,496 --> 00:35:52,398
Yeah, it is. l just hope
the security guard at the 7-Eleven...
584
00:35:52,466 --> 00:35:54,457
feels the same way.
585
00:35:57,972 --> 00:36:02,534
Listen. Deep down inside,
don't you feel just a little bit relieved?
586
00:36:03,878 --> 00:36:07,871
Yeah. l do, actually. l feel relieved...
587
00:36:09,083 --> 00:36:11,551
of $750 million.
588
00:36:14,021 --> 00:36:16,922
Yeah, l still got it, haven't l?
589
00:36:17,525 --> 00:36:19,083
-l'll say.
-Yeah.
590
00:36:21,863 --> 00:36:24,024
The hell with them.
We're gonna be fine, Arthur.
591
00:36:24,098 --> 00:36:26,430
-Yeah.
-We are, honestly.
592
00:36:26,500 --> 00:36:30,368
Look, you taught me how to be rich, right?
l'll teach you how to be poor.
593
00:36:30,438 --> 00:36:34,670
lt's really easy. lt's exactly the same thing.
You just do it in fewer rooms.
594
00:36:35,443 --> 00:36:37,877
Look, lesson number one.
595
00:36:38,512 --> 00:36:39,706
Hold on, now.
596
00:36:39,780 --> 00:36:42,271
Yeah. This is how poor people
comfort each other.
597
00:36:43,017 --> 00:36:45,713
And now this is how
poor people say l love you.
598
00:36:45,786 --> 00:36:47,947
l love you.
599
00:36:48,522 --> 00:36:51,582
See, they can't give each other
yachts or condominiums.
600
00:36:52,526 --> 00:36:54,994
Blimey. No wonder
there's so many of them.
601
00:36:56,864 --> 00:36:58,764
l never liked yachts anyway.
602
00:37:01,035 --> 00:37:03,799
What? Here? Now?
603
00:37:07,341 --> 00:37:09,468
For $750 million...
604
00:37:09,543 --> 00:37:12,341
lady, this better be good.
605
00:37:21,555 --> 00:37:25,924
Arthur, you've always been
my favorite grandchild.
606
00:37:28,562 --> 00:37:31,998
Martha, l am your only grandchild.
607
00:37:32,967 --> 00:37:35,401
l can't help you this time, Arthur.
608
00:37:35,603 --> 00:37:38,629
Burt Johnson has got our family
by the nuts.
609
00:37:42,209 --> 00:37:45,235
He's forced your father and l to cut you off.
610
00:37:45,546 --> 00:37:49,175
As of noon today,
you couldn't even sign a personal check.
611
00:37:49,417 --> 00:37:52,716
Martha, l've never seen you
give up like this before.
612
00:37:52,887 --> 00:37:57,256
You've never seen me this old before.
l'm not 75 anymore.
613
00:37:58,326 --> 00:38:00,055
Those were the days.
614
00:38:01,262 --> 00:38:03,127
You.
615
00:38:04,932 --> 00:38:07,730
Arthur, even if l could do something...
616
00:38:08,602 --> 00:38:10,297
l don't know that l would.
617
00:38:11,005 --> 00:38:14,031
Johnson is right. You belong with Susan.
618
00:38:14,108 --> 00:38:16,269
-Martha?
-l've always felt that.
619
00:38:16,344 --> 00:38:20,110
-Linda and l have been married--
-Martha, you ready for your workout?
620
00:38:28,956 --> 00:38:32,687
Martha, there's a nearly naked man
in your living room.
621
00:38:33,561 --> 00:38:37,554
My doctor suggested
that l try a little exercise.
622
00:38:38,699 --> 00:38:42,157
Troy, this is my grandson Arthur.
623
00:38:45,239 --> 00:38:48,902
Arthur's just lost $750 million.
624
00:38:49,310 --> 00:38:52,939
-$750 million? Damn! Sorry to hear that.
-lt's a long story--
625
00:38:53,014 --> 00:38:55,915
Yeah, so anyway,
Martha, you ready to rock and roll?
626
00:39:00,755 --> 00:39:03,588
Breathe. Let it out.
627
00:39:04,358 --> 00:39:06,724
Here we go, jumping jacks.
628
00:39:07,995 --> 00:39:10,293
Come on, kick it up.
629
00:39:13,267 --> 00:39:14,495
Yeah, that's it.
630
00:39:15,136 --> 00:39:18,333
You with me, Martha? Let's go.
631
00:39:19,407 --> 00:39:22,069
-Martha, you just sit here and watch?
-Yes.
632
00:39:22,676 --> 00:39:24,667
All right, Martha, pushups.
633
00:39:24,745 --> 00:39:27,680
l started out 20 minutes a day.
634
00:39:27,748 --> 00:39:32,276
Now l can do nearly a whole hour.
lt's done wonders for me, Arthur.
635
00:39:32,353 --> 00:39:35,254
-l've never felt this well in my entire life.
-Yeah, l can--
636
00:39:35,322 --> 00:39:37,722
Okay, let's work those hips, Martha.
637
00:39:38,259 --> 00:39:41,319
ln and out. Come on, Martha.
638
00:39:41,395 --> 00:39:44,330
Arthur, l think this is my favorite one.
639
00:39:44,598 --> 00:39:49,535
Yeah. Here we go.
All the way around, Martha.
640
00:39:49,603 --> 00:39:51,366
Yeah.
641
00:39:52,773 --> 00:39:57,210
-No pain, no gain.
-Arthur, marry Susan.
642
00:39:57,711 --> 00:40:01,647
You've had your fling.
Now it's time to face facts.
643
00:40:01,715 --> 00:40:02,909
Martha.
644
00:40:02,983 --> 00:40:07,647
Arthur, are you saying
that your marriage to Linda Marolla...
645
00:40:07,721 --> 00:40:10,747
that nobody, a waitress from Queens...
646
00:40:10,825 --> 00:40:15,489
is worth more than $750 million?
647
00:40:16,363 --> 00:40:18,456
l love her, Martha.
648
00:40:18,532 --> 00:40:20,932
That's not what l asked you, is it?
649
00:40:21,769 --> 00:40:24,829
Now this is my real favorite.
650
00:40:25,106 --> 00:40:26,198
l can see why.
651
00:40:26,273 --> 00:40:28,468
We'll take a little break. Yeah.
652
00:40:28,542 --> 00:40:30,407
Keep the buttocks tight.
653
00:40:34,381 --> 00:40:36,042
What do you think, should l take this?
654
00:40:36,117 --> 00:40:39,382
-Yes. You'll need warm things.
-Yeah. That's right.
655
00:40:41,889 --> 00:40:44,380
That looks about right.
656
00:40:45,326 --> 00:40:46,315
Greta...
657
00:40:47,495 --> 00:40:50,726
you better take these.
They were on the jewelry inventory.
658
00:40:51,599 --> 00:40:54,033
All right. l guess that's it.
659
00:41:04,512 --> 00:41:06,104
You talk to her.
660
00:41:07,414 --> 00:41:10,815
The wife and l feel just awful
about this, Mrs. Bach.
661
00:41:11,452 --> 00:41:13,818
lf there's anything
that we could do to help...
662
00:41:13,888 --> 00:41:15,287
please let us know.
663
00:41:15,356 --> 00:41:16,880
Mary, thank you.
664
00:41:16,957 --> 00:41:18,584
There's really nothing...
665
00:41:18,659 --> 00:41:22,425
unless, of course, you'd like to loan us
$10 million to tide us over.
666
00:41:23,197 --> 00:41:26,894
l love you guys. Thank you.
Please take care of yourself.
667
00:41:27,268 --> 00:41:30,328
Okay. You mind if l just have a minute
alone in here?
668
00:41:30,404 --> 00:41:31,928
Of course.
669
00:41:50,224 --> 00:41:52,385
Sir. l've packed your bag.
670
00:41:53,494 --> 00:41:55,121
Thanks, Fairchild.
671
00:41:55,596 --> 00:41:57,461
l've never been in here.
672
00:41:59,366 --> 00:42:01,266
This was Hobson's room.
673
00:42:04,672 --> 00:42:06,936
lt's much larger than my room.
674
00:42:07,474 --> 00:42:09,635
l've kept it locked up.
675
00:42:10,544 --> 00:42:12,842
He's someone l didn't want to forget.
676
00:42:13,881 --> 00:42:18,580
Yes, l think l understand, sir.
My father died when l was 10.
677
00:42:18,752 --> 00:42:20,185
l'm sorry.
678
00:42:20,254 --> 00:42:21,414
The big ''C.''
679
00:42:22,656 --> 00:42:24,487
Yeah, cancer?
680
00:42:24,658 --> 00:42:28,150
No, sir, he drowned in the big sea.
681
00:42:34,635 --> 00:42:36,603
By the by, sir...
682
00:42:36,670 --> 00:42:39,833
l've been thinking it over,
and that business with the soap?
683
00:42:39,907 --> 00:42:42,171
-Yes.
-l think l get it.
684
00:42:42,243 --> 00:42:43,301
Good.
685
00:42:45,946 --> 00:42:47,573
lt was very funny, sir.
686
00:42:48,482 --> 00:42:51,315
Yes, it was. Thank you, Fairchild.
687
00:43:07,868 --> 00:43:11,133
l want to thank you both for everything.
688
00:43:12,406 --> 00:43:15,637
Will the two of you be all right?
l mean, do you have...
689
00:43:16,677 --> 00:43:17,769
a place to go?
690
00:43:17,845 --> 00:43:20,405
-Yeah. Sure. No problem.
-Yeah. No problem.
691
00:43:28,822 --> 00:43:30,949
-No, it can't be.
-Hi, Dad.
692
00:43:31,792 --> 00:43:34,283
-No.
-Dad, wait a minute.
693
00:43:34,361 --> 00:43:37,592
Open the door, Dad. lt's only temporary.
694
00:43:38,699 --> 00:43:39,723
Dad.
695
00:43:46,106 --> 00:43:49,507
This isn't happening. l don't believe it.
696
00:43:50,144 --> 00:43:51,543
This can't be happening.
697
00:43:57,885 --> 00:44:00,183
What about my new house
in Fort Lauderdale?
698
00:44:00,254 --> 00:44:03,018
Dad, there is no more house.
The house is history.
699
00:44:03,090 --> 00:44:04,887
Haven't you been listening?
700
00:44:04,958 --> 00:44:07,085
l've been trying not to, actually.
701
00:44:07,161 --> 00:44:10,460
This must be awfully difficult
for both of you, being sober.
702
00:44:11,498 --> 00:44:14,797
We'll stay in the guest room,
and it's only temporary. l promise.
703
00:44:14,868 --> 00:44:17,063
Right. l mean,
we'll both be dead in 40 years.
704
00:44:17,137 --> 00:44:19,935
Fifty, tops. Right, darling?
What are you doing?
705
00:44:20,007 --> 00:44:23,033
l'm clipping coupons
in case we want to eat next week.
706
00:44:23,544 --> 00:44:26,980
Make yourself useful, honey.
Cut along the dotted line.
707
00:44:27,047 --> 00:44:28,708
Dotted line?
708
00:44:29,817 --> 00:44:32,285
About that house in Fort Lauderdale
....
709
00:44:32,553 --> 00:44:35,784
Arthur, l don't want you
to get the wrong idea.
710
00:44:36,190 --> 00:44:39,159
l mean, l just didn't love you
for your money.
711
00:44:39,360 --> 00:44:41,453
No, l appreciate that, Ralph.
712
00:44:41,829 --> 00:44:45,788
l loved you for your father's money!
713
00:44:45,866 --> 00:44:49,962
God! l'm sorry. l'll be all right. Excuse me.
714
00:44:50,037 --> 00:44:51,937
l apologize. Excuse me.
715
00:44:55,943 --> 00:44:57,774
God, no.
716
00:44:59,313 --> 00:45:03,044
Oh, God! Why me?
717
00:45:03,751 --> 00:45:04,877
Dad.
718
00:45:24,338 --> 00:45:27,068
-Hiya.
-Oops. What'll it be?
719
00:45:27,708 --> 00:45:31,109
Give me two poached eggs on rye,
and make that toast well-done.
720
00:45:31,178 --> 00:45:33,738
Yeah, you got it.
Two Adam and Eve on rye.
721
00:45:33,814 --> 00:45:35,076
Sink them and then burn them.
722
00:45:35,149 --> 00:45:36,548
All right!
723
00:45:37,951 --> 00:45:39,714
You must have waitressed before.
724
00:45:39,787 --> 00:45:41,414
Yeah. About five years ago.
725
00:45:41,488 --> 00:45:43,820
Speaking of five years,
where's my English muffin?
726
00:45:43,891 --> 00:45:45,518
-Coming.
-lt's just an English muffin.
727
00:45:45,592 --> 00:45:46,923
What did l do, stump the chef?
728
00:45:46,994 --> 00:45:48,518
Stump the chef. That's very funny.
729
00:45:48,595 --> 00:45:51,393
You're a very funny little customer.
lt's coming.
730
00:45:52,399 --> 00:45:54,697
Hi. What'll it be?
731
00:45:55,002 --> 00:45:57,937
l only got $4.00. What do you recommend?
732
00:45:58,405 --> 00:46:00,839
l recommend a cup of coffee
and a $3.00 tip.
733
00:46:01,675 --> 00:46:04,735
l'm only kidding. l'll get you the meat loaf.
You'll love it.
734
00:46:04,812 --> 00:46:08,270
One Alpo special. lt's coming.
735
00:46:08,715 --> 00:46:10,410
-You married?
-Yeah.
736
00:46:10,651 --> 00:46:13,347
God. l wish l were.
What does your husband do?
737
00:46:13,454 --> 00:46:15,479
Actually, today he's out looking for a job.
738
00:46:15,556 --> 00:46:16,545
What did he used to do?
739
00:46:16,623 --> 00:46:19,922
Everything. Except look for a job.
Where's that English?
740
00:46:19,993 --> 00:46:21,483
-You got it.
-Thanks.
741
00:46:22,963 --> 00:46:25,295
What, no butter? No jelly?
742
00:46:25,899 --> 00:46:28,163
You should have ordered the meat loaf.
743
00:46:30,304 --> 00:46:31,896
There you go.
744
00:46:32,005 --> 00:46:34,838
As they say in the West,
don't let your meat loaf.
745
00:47:09,935 --> 00:47:12,267
-Hi.
-Hi.
746
00:47:13,272 --> 00:47:15,399
Susan, hi.
747
00:47:15,941 --> 00:47:18,569
Goodness, you're looking tall.
748
00:47:18,911 --> 00:47:22,176
Quite tall.
Taller than l remember. Statuesque.
749
00:47:22,581 --> 00:47:24,071
Amazonian, really.
750
00:47:24,550 --> 00:47:28,452
-l've been expecting you.
-No. Don't say that.
751
00:47:28,520 --> 00:47:30,317
Susan, we have to talk.
752
00:47:30,389 --> 00:47:31,822
l want you to know that...
753
00:47:31,890 --> 00:47:34,620
l don't hate you
for what you did to me, Arthur.
754
00:47:34,993 --> 00:47:37,291
-l could never hate you.
-No.
755
00:47:37,362 --> 00:47:40,388
Thanks to Dr. Lyman,
l've worked through all those emotions.
756
00:47:40,466 --> 00:47:43,924
-You're seeing a psychiatrist?
-l'm down to three times a week.
757
00:47:44,203 --> 00:47:48,264
Arthur, there's a big Christmas party
on my father's yacht next week.
758
00:47:48,340 --> 00:47:51,503
lt would be the perfect time
to announce our re-engagement.
759
00:47:51,577 --> 00:47:53,204
l still have the ring.
760
00:47:55,380 --> 00:47:57,177
No. Put that away.
761
00:47:57,850 --> 00:48:01,183
Linda? You're Susan. Listen...
762
00:48:01,954 --> 00:48:04,684
Linda thinks l'm out looking for a job.
763
00:48:06,592 --> 00:48:07,957
But l'm not.
764
00:48:09,094 --> 00:48:13,656
l'm here asking you to call your father off.
765
00:48:15,000 --> 00:48:19,801
Call him off? But why?
Arthur, we were happy, weren't we?
766
00:48:19,905 --> 00:48:22,203
Sure we were. Then we met.
767
00:48:27,513 --> 00:48:28,946
That was a joke.
768
00:48:29,014 --> 00:48:32,245
But, of course, there's no way for you
to have known that.
769
00:48:33,619 --> 00:48:37,817
l married Linda because
l wanted to spend my life with her.
770
00:48:37,890 --> 00:48:39,357
l love her.
771
00:48:40,159 --> 00:48:44,357
She's not right for you, Arthur.
She's not one of us.
772
00:48:44,596 --> 00:48:48,589
And if it takes what Daddy's doing
to make you see that...
773
00:48:48,667 --> 00:48:49,998
well then, so be it.
774
00:48:50,435 --> 00:48:51,800
Susan...
775
00:48:53,372 --> 00:48:55,306
you're such an asshole.
776
00:49:00,579 --> 00:49:03,377
l'm a woman who knows what she wants.
777
00:49:03,949 --> 00:49:05,814
l always get what l want, Arthur.
778
00:49:06,385 --> 00:49:08,876
-Why not?
-And what l want is you.
779
00:49:09,087 --> 00:49:10,145
Yeah.
780
00:49:12,858 --> 00:49:16,294
Okay, you scrape with a penny.
You could win $1 million with this.
781
00:49:16,361 --> 00:49:18,693
-Win $1 million?
-$1 million.
782
00:49:18,764 --> 00:49:22,894
So that means if l won 750 of those,
l'll be back where l started, right?
783
00:49:23,368 --> 00:49:25,461
Let's just take them
one at a time, all right?
784
00:49:25,537 --> 00:49:27,437
-Okay.
-All right. Here we go.
785
00:49:29,074 --> 00:49:31,201
-See, nothing matches. You lose.
-Wait a minute.
786
00:49:31,276 --> 00:49:32,743
Are you scratching the right side?
787
00:49:32,811 --> 00:49:35,905
-Doesn't matter. Six or nine--
-You have three on both sides.
788
00:49:36,348 --> 00:49:38,714
lf they match, don't you get something?
789
00:49:40,285 --> 00:49:41,912
Hold it!
790
00:49:42,588 --> 00:49:44,180
All right, here we go.
791
00:49:45,958 --> 00:49:47,050
What is it?
792
00:49:47,526 --> 00:49:51,724
lt's free. Look, it's nutritious. lt's delicious.
793
00:49:52,698 --> 00:49:55,667
l brought it home from the diner.
lt's meat loaf, Dad.
794
00:49:55,767 --> 00:49:59,328
l'm only asking in case
l have to describe it later to a doctor.
795
00:50:03,375 --> 00:50:05,969
Until either one of you
brings home a paycheck...
796
00:50:06,044 --> 00:50:08,035
l don't want to hear any complaints.
797
00:50:08,113 --> 00:50:09,580
How's the job hunting going?
798
00:50:09,648 --> 00:50:11,775
Good. l've seen about five people--
799
00:50:11,850 --> 00:50:14,318
l need a résumé first of all, and--
800
00:50:14,386 --> 00:50:17,753
Hold it! God, this is some family.
801
00:50:18,757 --> 00:50:21,248
Every year, the two of you
get more and more alike.
802
00:50:21,326 --> 00:50:22,350
All right, we ready?
803
00:50:22,427 --> 00:50:24,452
Arthur, you need
some mashed potatoes. Here.
804
00:50:24,529 --> 00:50:27,555
-l do?
-Yes. They're good for you.
805
00:50:32,237 --> 00:50:33,534
We're set.
806
00:50:34,606 --> 00:50:36,506
You say the blessing, Arthur.
807
00:50:37,142 --> 00:50:38,166
Blessing?
808
00:50:38,577 --> 00:50:41,375
Yeah. Just tell us
something you're thankful for.
809
00:50:55,360 --> 00:50:59,126
l'm thankful
l got the smallest piece of meat loaf.
810
00:51:08,707 --> 00:51:10,231
lt's a magical night.
811
00:51:12,377 --> 00:51:13,605
Who could that be?
812
00:51:13,679 --> 00:51:15,704
lt's probably somebody
standing in the hall...
813
00:51:15,781 --> 00:51:16,805
knocking on the door.
814
00:51:16,882 --> 00:51:20,249
Maybe it's the mother of this meat loaf
coming to kill you.
815
00:51:22,421 --> 00:51:24,355
lt's all right. l got it, Arthur.
816
00:51:24,423 --> 00:51:28,018
Sit down, sweetheart. lt's all right.
Don't pay any attention.
817
00:51:31,196 --> 00:51:32,322
Yeah, Nick? What is it?
818
00:51:32,397 --> 00:51:35,161
l understand there are
two individuals living here...
819
00:51:35,233 --> 00:51:36,461
who are not on the lease.
820
00:51:36,535 --> 00:51:37,934
They're family.
821
00:51:38,003 --> 00:51:40,267
They're staying
until they get back on their feet.
822
00:51:40,339 --> 00:51:43,399
l'm sorry, Ralph,
but this building's just been sold.
823
00:51:43,475 --> 00:51:47,138
And the new owner is insisting
that all the regulations be enforced.
824
00:51:47,512 --> 00:51:49,275
What are you trying to say?
825
00:51:49,581 --> 00:51:51,947
ln fact, he mentioned you specifically.
826
00:51:52,084 --> 00:51:54,279
Wait a minute. A new owner, did you say?
827
00:51:54,353 --> 00:51:56,685
Let me guess. Burt Johnson Enterprises.
828
00:51:57,856 --> 00:51:59,323
Yeah. That's right.
829
00:51:59,424 --> 00:52:04,020
You folks have enemies in high places.
You must have screwed up really bad.
830
00:52:09,134 --> 00:52:11,329
142. This has got to be it here.
831
00:52:11,403 --> 00:52:15,464
-ls that it?
-140. Okay, Arthur, look at me.
832
00:52:15,540 --> 00:52:18,065
Now remember, let me
do the talking, okay? Here we go.
833
00:52:18,143 --> 00:52:21,306
''Eat-in kitchen with lOL in every room.''
What does that mean?
834
00:52:21,380 --> 00:52:22,472
Who knows? Who cares?
835
00:52:22,547 --> 00:52:24,572
lt's the cheapest apartment
in the whole city.
836
00:52:24,649 --> 00:52:26,810
lf it has a floor, we're taking it.
837
00:52:28,754 --> 00:52:31,518
lt has a floor. We're doomed.
838
00:52:31,590 --> 00:52:33,581
Honey, what's the super's name?
839
00:52:36,595 --> 00:52:37,789
Butterworth.
840
00:52:39,064 --> 00:52:40,759
lOL. What does that mean?
841
00:53:01,720 --> 00:53:02,744
-Hello.
-Hi.
842
00:53:02,821 --> 00:53:05,654
l spoke to you earlier today
about the apartment.
843
00:53:05,724 --> 00:53:06,816
What?
844
00:53:07,125 --> 00:53:09,286
l spoke to you earlier today
on the telephone...
845
00:53:09,361 --> 00:53:10,623
about the apartment for rent.
846
00:53:10,695 --> 00:53:12,993
Yes, about the apartment.
847
00:53:13,065 --> 00:53:15,966
Yes, l'm Linda Bach,
and this is my husband Arthur.
848
00:53:16,034 --> 00:53:18,366
-Yeah, but she'll be doing--
-Speak up, honey.
849
00:53:18,437 --> 00:53:20,598
She'll do all the talking. l can't be trusted.
850
00:53:20,672 --> 00:53:22,139
Don't yell!
851
00:53:23,075 --> 00:53:26,067
-l suppose you want to see the apartment.
-Yes, please.
852
00:53:26,144 --> 00:53:29,079
lt's upstairs. Apartment 5.
853
00:53:30,348 --> 00:53:31,474
Great.
854
00:53:34,186 --> 00:53:36,552
This is a beautiful place you got here.
855
00:53:36,922 --> 00:53:38,549
What are you, blind?
856
00:53:39,558 --> 00:53:42,994
Here's something you've never seen.
Come here.
857
00:53:45,163 --> 00:53:47,927
l had them put this electric chair in.
858
00:53:50,202 --> 00:53:51,396
lt's a great idea.
859
00:53:51,470 --> 00:53:53,267
-Yes, very nice.
-Thank you.
860
00:53:55,474 --> 00:53:56,634
That's good.
861
00:54:06,118 --> 00:54:07,676
ls it working?
862
00:54:07,919 --> 00:54:11,320
Of course it's working. We're on our way.
863
00:54:13,859 --> 00:54:16,089
Look, maybe if you just gave us the key.
864
00:54:16,161 --> 00:54:18,322
Sorry. Not allowed.
865
00:54:18,763 --> 00:54:21,254
-Another step.
-That felt great.
866
00:54:24,603 --> 00:54:27,094
lt'll be a co-op by the time we get there.
867
00:54:27,405 --> 00:54:31,466
Hold on. l've gotta tie my shoelace.
You go on ahead. l'll catch up.
868
00:54:36,815 --> 00:54:38,646
You folks have any children?
869
00:54:40,719 --> 00:54:41,913
-Not yet.
-Not yet.
870
00:54:44,656 --> 00:54:47,784
-But we might have--
-By the time we see this apartment.
871
00:54:48,493 --> 00:54:50,120
l think you'll like it.
872
00:54:50,228 --> 00:54:53,459
lt's got lOL in every room.
873
00:54:53,999 --> 00:54:57,332
-lOL.
-lsland of Love.
874
00:54:58,970 --> 00:55:01,905
-No. lnteroffice Lubrication.
-That must be it.
875
00:55:03,008 --> 00:55:06,569
You know, Ferrari makes this.
There's just a few bugs to work out.
876
00:55:08,580 --> 00:55:10,241
What is lOL?
877
00:55:10,949 --> 00:55:12,780
You'll find out soon enough.
878
00:55:16,321 --> 00:55:17,481
Here we are.
879
00:55:20,525 --> 00:55:22,493
-Can l help you?
-No.
880
00:55:23,695 --> 00:55:25,754
Don't do it. Thank God.
881
00:55:32,037 --> 00:55:35,336
The artist who lives here
couldn't pay his rent. Bum.
882
00:55:35,974 --> 00:55:37,669
This is the living room.
883
00:55:38,677 --> 00:55:40,907
Come. l'll show you the kitchen.
884
00:55:41,046 --> 00:55:44,174
-Let's get out of here.
-Wait. Let's give it a chance.
885
00:55:45,750 --> 00:55:49,242
Your stove, refrigerator, sink, cabinets...
886
00:55:49,888 --> 00:55:51,253
everything handy.
887
00:55:52,190 --> 00:55:54,590
Don't get too attached to any of this stuff.
888
00:55:54,659 --> 00:55:57,219
The guy who lives here
is taking everything with him.
889
00:55:57,295 --> 00:56:00,025
-What is that smell?
-Bug bomb.
890
00:56:00,432 --> 00:56:03,162
They work much better
than the Roach Motel.
891
00:56:04,202 --> 00:56:07,330
The roach motel wouldn't look
that bad to me right now.
892
00:56:07,439 --> 00:56:08,599
The bedroom.
893
00:56:10,275 --> 00:56:12,072
Beautiful view.
894
00:56:15,247 --> 00:56:17,738
l almost forgot. Come here.
895
00:56:18,216 --> 00:56:20,116
l want to show you something.
896
00:56:22,787 --> 00:56:23,879
Watch this.
897
00:56:24,990 --> 00:56:27,356
See? lnstant On Lighting.
898
00:56:27,425 --> 00:56:29,188
lOL in every room.
899
00:56:31,196 --> 00:56:33,221
lnstant on lighting?
900
00:56:33,431 --> 00:56:36,366
Honey, look. lt's true.
There's virtually no delay.
901
00:56:36,434 --> 00:56:39,096
Thought it was sort of come-on.
Come here and try this.
902
00:56:39,170 --> 00:56:41,070
You're asking $800
....
903
00:56:41,139 --> 00:56:42,936
-Arthur!
-l'm hooked.
904
00:56:43,008 --> 00:56:46,444
You're asking $850 for this place
with a straight face?
905
00:56:46,511 --> 00:56:48,945
-ln advance.
-lOL. Come on.
906
00:56:49,547 --> 00:56:53,005
Look, l've only been working two weeks.
l've got $350. You take it...
907
00:56:53,084 --> 00:56:54,449
or you leave it.
908
00:56:54,519 --> 00:56:58,751
l'll take it. Here's the key. l'll send
the lease up to you in the morning.
909
00:56:59,190 --> 00:57:01,488
-You'd better get started.
-That's 12 hours away.
910
00:57:01,559 --> 00:57:03,083
-He'll never make it.
-Thanks a lot.
911
00:57:03,161 --> 00:57:05,095
That's it. He won't make that.
912
00:57:05,563 --> 00:57:09,590
God, lOL. l've always dreamt of lOL.
913
00:57:10,735 --> 00:57:11,827
Listen.
914
00:57:11,936 --> 00:57:13,927
We clean this place up,
we paint the walls...
915
00:57:14,005 --> 00:57:16,200
this place would be a shit hole.
916
00:57:17,342 --> 00:57:18,400
You know?
917
00:57:20,011 --> 00:57:23,606
We're not staying here one moment
longer than we have to, all right?
918
00:57:23,682 --> 00:57:26,515
But right now, this is it.
This is what we've got.
919
00:57:26,651 --> 00:57:27,743
l'm gonna make this work.
920
00:57:27,819 --> 00:57:31,016
We can make this work.
l can clean this place up just fine.
921
00:57:31,089 --> 00:57:33,683
l mean, lots of families
live in much worse than this.
922
00:57:33,758 --> 00:57:35,123
But, Arthur...
923
00:57:36,027 --> 00:57:39,258
honey, we're gonna have to
become a two-income family.
924
00:57:39,364 --> 00:57:42,390
You're gonna get a second job? Sorry.
925
00:57:42,734 --> 00:57:45,202
Listen, l'm gonna apply for unemployment.
926
00:57:47,906 --> 00:57:51,069
You cannot collect unemployment
until you've worked some.
927
00:57:51,142 --> 00:57:52,666
Arthur!
928
00:57:54,446 --> 00:57:57,711
What do you expect me to do?
l mean, what am l trained to do?
929
00:57:57,782 --> 00:57:59,807
For Christ's sake, you went to Harvard.
930
00:57:59,884 --> 00:58:00,976
l did?
931
00:58:02,687 --> 00:58:04,279
What did you major in?
932
00:58:05,924 --> 00:58:06,948
Ballet.
933
00:58:08,660 --> 00:58:09,820
Fine.
934
00:58:10,061 --> 00:58:12,359
You're not even gonna try? That's fine.
935
00:58:12,497 --> 00:58:14,465
You're not even gonna try to help.
936
00:58:14,532 --> 00:58:18,263
Try what? l mean, tell me.
What do you want me to do?
937
00:58:18,336 --> 00:58:20,827
-l want you to grow up.
-Grow up?
938
00:58:20,905 --> 00:58:22,668
l want you to get a job.
939
00:58:22,841 --> 00:58:23,865
Fine.
940
00:58:23,942 --> 00:58:26,536
This is real life, Arthur. l mean, this is it.
941
00:58:26,611 --> 00:58:27,737
This is it?
942
00:58:31,015 --> 00:58:32,642
Fine. There's the door.
943
00:58:32,784 --> 00:58:34,149
That's the door.
944
00:58:34,219 --> 00:58:37,086
l wondered what it was
with the brass knob and the chain...
945
00:58:37,155 --> 00:58:38,952
and the little hole you peep through...
946
00:58:39,023 --> 00:58:41,457
and the ''gents'' restroom
....
l know where the door is.
947
00:58:41,526 --> 00:58:43,323
Do you know where a job is?
948
00:58:46,798 --> 00:58:47,822
Fine.
949
00:58:48,967 --> 00:58:49,956
Fine.
950
00:58:51,803 --> 00:58:54,863
Maybe you shouldn't wait up
because l might not be back.
951
00:58:54,939 --> 00:58:56,304
-Fine.
-l am off.
952
00:58:56,875 --> 00:58:57,864
Fine.
953
00:58:58,109 --> 00:59:00,168
Fine, l am really off.
954
00:59:00,345 --> 00:59:02,108
-Fine.
-Fine.
955
00:59:03,681 --> 00:59:05,046
Arthur, don't procrastinate.
956
00:59:05,116 --> 00:59:07,050
lf you say you're gonna
do something, do it.
957
00:59:07,118 --> 00:59:10,884
You go to the door, take the knob,
and move your ass. Mrs. Canby.
958
00:59:10,955 --> 00:59:12,616
Mrs. Canby? What
....
959
00:59:15,493 --> 00:59:19,759
Mr. Marolla said l could find you here.
ls this a bad time?
960
00:59:21,966 --> 00:59:23,524
-No.
-No.
961
00:59:25,003 --> 00:59:26,971
Why don't you come in?
962
00:59:27,405 --> 00:59:29,430
Yeah, come on in.
963
00:59:29,674 --> 00:59:32,074
Yeah. Suffered a minor setback
since we last saw you.
964
00:59:32,143 --> 00:59:34,168
Yes, l know. Linda filled me in a little.
965
00:59:34,245 --> 00:59:36,440
-Change of address.
-Heart attack.
966
00:59:36,514 --> 00:59:39,312
l called her, Arthur. l had to. l wanted to
....
967
00:59:39,384 --> 00:59:42,785
Park Avenue gets on your nerves
after a while.
968
00:59:42,921 --> 00:59:45,754
Look, we just got here ourselves,
Mrs. Canby, so
....
969
00:59:45,824 --> 00:59:47,348
But it's
....
970
00:59:47,992 --> 00:59:52,088
lt's fine. l mean, look, there's the fireplace,
and it evidently works.
971
00:59:52,831 --> 00:59:54,355
l'll give you a tour.
972
00:59:55,767 --> 00:59:59,897
Here's the kitchen,
which is really convenient, you know.
973
01:00:01,439 --> 01:00:02,599
That's a bug bomb.
974
01:00:02,674 --> 01:00:05,268
lt's better than Roach Motel.
975
01:00:06,578 --> 01:00:08,136
-Safer, too.
-Yeah.
976
01:00:08,213 --> 01:00:10,306
And this is the bedroom.
977
01:00:10,782 --> 01:00:13,342
See, Mrs. Canby,
what l thought we could do is...
978
01:00:13,418 --> 01:00:16,012
move the bed over to there...
979
01:00:16,387 --> 01:00:20,050
even if it blocks the bathroom a bit,
because this gives a bigger area...
980
01:00:20,124 --> 01:00:21,853
for the nursery, you know.
981
01:00:22,260 --> 01:00:23,352
lt's light and sunny--
982
01:00:23,428 --> 01:00:26,397
We're gonna let the kid
keep all the mice he catches.
983
01:00:31,336 --> 01:00:33,702
We've blown it, haven't we, Mrs. Canby?
984
01:00:34,305 --> 01:00:37,274
No, you haven't. Come on, this will be fine.
985
01:00:37,609 --> 01:00:41,340
Why don't we all go in the living room
and sit down and talk?
986
01:00:42,180 --> 01:00:44,307
We had such a nice house.
987
01:00:44,749 --> 01:00:48,310
Some of my favorite people
were raised in worse places than this.
988
01:00:50,121 --> 01:00:52,487
This used to be an artist's place,
as you can tell.
989
01:00:52,557 --> 01:00:56,084
Yeah, he's gonna come
pick this stuff up soon, l hope.
990
01:00:56,895 --> 01:00:58,260
l'll sit on this.
991
01:01:04,869 --> 01:01:06,666
Get the pecking order right.
992
01:01:07,572 --> 01:01:10,598
So, Linda, you told me
you're working at a diner.
993
01:01:10,675 --> 01:01:14,543
Yes. You can drop by any time you want.
All the free food you can eat.
994
01:01:14,612 --> 01:01:18,207
Yeah. l recommend the meat loaf.
lt's great.
995
01:01:18,349 --> 01:01:20,613
-l enjoyed it.
-Thank you.
996
01:01:20,752 --> 01:01:24,051
How about you, Arthur?
How are you doing with your drinking?
997
01:01:24,422 --> 01:01:26,253
Great.
998
01:01:26,324 --> 01:01:28,155
Have you been looking for a job?
999
01:01:28,526 --> 01:01:30,391
We were just discussing that before you--
1000
01:01:30,461 --> 01:01:33,726
You know something?
He was on his way out when you came in.
1001
01:01:35,199 --> 01:01:37,531
That's terrific, 'cause l've got some news.
1002
01:01:37,602 --> 01:01:38,830
What news?
1003
01:01:39,604 --> 01:01:41,037
There's a baby.
1004
01:01:41,105 --> 01:01:43,869
-There's a baby?
-What? Did you hear that, Arthur?
1005
01:01:43,942 --> 01:01:47,036
Of course l did. l'm sitting closer to her.
l heard it before you.
1006
01:01:47,111 --> 01:01:48,635
Wait. There's a baby?
1007
01:01:48,746 --> 01:01:50,441
There's an unwed mother...
1008
01:01:50,515 --> 01:01:52,483
and her due date
is less than two weeks away.
1009
01:01:52,550 --> 01:01:55,075
And she wants to give up her baby
for adoption?
1010
01:01:55,153 --> 01:01:58,452
-My God, l got to get busy.
-That's great.
1011
01:01:58,523 --> 01:02:02,516
This is very, very unofficial,
but l would like to see it happen.
1012
01:02:02,594 --> 01:02:05,529
-Mrs. Canby
....
-Us, too.
1013
01:02:05,597 --> 01:02:08,566
-l wasn't here today.
-Okay. All right.
1014
01:02:08,933 --> 01:02:13,302
l'll be back next week.
Can you have these walls painted by then?
1015
01:02:13,671 --> 01:02:15,935
What's your favorite color? Absolutely.
1016
01:02:16,007 --> 01:02:18,032
And can you have
some furniture in this room?
1017
01:02:18,109 --> 01:02:19,235
Absolutely.
1018
01:02:19,911 --> 01:02:23,813
And, Arthur, can you stay off the drinking
and get a job?
1019
01:02:23,881 --> 01:02:25,371
Absolutely.
1020
01:02:27,852 --> 01:02:30,980
Look, just think of it
as a big toy store for grown-ups.
1021
01:02:31,055 --> 01:02:34,684
-Okay. Yeah, that's a real help.
-lt's gonna be fine.
1022
01:02:35,560 --> 01:02:37,255
Yeah, l know.
1023
01:02:40,198 --> 01:02:41,790
-What are you writing, honey?
-Well--
1024
01:02:41,866 --> 01:02:44,027
Never mind. Doesn't matter.
He won't read that.
1025
01:02:44,102 --> 01:02:46,696
lt's what you do in person.
lt's how you talk to him.
1026
01:02:46,771 --> 01:02:50,263
lf you're confident. lf you're not nervous.
You'll get the job.
1027
01:02:50,341 --> 01:02:51,865
Sit over there. Okay. Next.
1028
01:02:54,479 --> 01:02:57,573
-Come on in.
-Good luck, darling.
1029
01:03:07,058 --> 01:03:08,821
Sit down.
1030
01:03:10,662 --> 01:03:12,630
Last job held...
1031
01:03:13,665 --> 01:03:15,428
millionaire playboy?
1032
01:03:15,700 --> 01:03:19,136
-Right.
-Exactly what did that entail?
1033
01:03:20,505 --> 01:03:22,905
l raced cars. l bred horses.
1034
01:03:23,975 --> 01:03:25,670
l yachted. The usual.
1035
01:03:26,978 --> 01:03:30,004
Mr. Bach, this is a hardware store.
1036
01:03:30,081 --> 01:03:33,107
Have you ever been
inside a hardware store?
1037
01:03:34,786 --> 01:03:38,586
No, not actually inside, l must confess.
1038
01:03:38,856 --> 01:03:42,053
Once l overheard the servants talk
about how they had to go to one.
1039
01:03:42,126 --> 01:03:43,218
You deal in tools, right?
1040
01:03:43,294 --> 01:03:44,625
Servants?
1041
01:03:46,097 --> 01:03:47,860
That's one for the books.
1042
01:03:48,766 --> 01:03:50,028
You're laughing.
1043
01:03:50,101 --> 01:03:52,296
That means you like me.
1044
01:03:53,204 --> 01:03:55,468
lt's going great.
He's laughing and everything.
1045
01:03:55,540 --> 01:03:56,837
l'll keep you informed.
1046
01:03:57,775 --> 01:03:59,367
We're getting on fine, aren't we?
1047
01:03:59,444 --> 01:04:02,277
Arthur, we're looking for somebody
who's honest...
1048
01:04:02,447 --> 01:04:05,575
not afraid to learn,
and not afraid to do a little hard work.
1049
01:04:05,650 --> 01:04:07,584
Hank, if you hire me, l'll help you look.
1050
01:04:09,687 --> 01:04:12,679
How do l think of these things? Wait.
1051
01:04:13,357 --> 01:04:15,757
l just got off a great zinger
about helping him look.
1052
01:04:15,827 --> 01:04:17,317
lt's in the bag.
1053
01:04:22,667 --> 01:04:25,431
This is sort of new to you.
How about a drink?
1054
01:04:25,503 --> 01:04:27,198
No. lt's not time.
1055
01:04:28,072 --> 01:04:29,369
Now it's time.
1056
01:04:33,811 --> 01:04:36,109
Arthur, what are you doing here?
1057
01:04:36,180 --> 01:04:37,807
l'm having a drink with you.
1058
01:04:37,882 --> 01:04:40,908
Come on, Arthur, really.
What are you doing here?
1059
01:04:40,985 --> 01:04:44,011
My wife is trying to adopt a baby...
1060
01:04:44,088 --> 01:04:46,579
and the agency said l have to have a job.
1061
01:04:49,360 --> 01:04:51,419
You know, she's really depending on me.
1062
01:04:51,496 --> 01:04:54,192
Nobody's ever depended on me ever
for anything.
1063
01:04:55,299 --> 01:04:57,460
l'm scared to death, but here l am.
1064
01:04:58,402 --> 01:04:59,630
Everybody says...
1065
01:04:59,704 --> 01:05:02,935
we're supposed to give
kids without any experience a break.
1066
01:05:03,207 --> 01:05:06,472
l don't see why l can't give
somebody my own age a break, also.
1067
01:05:06,544 --> 01:05:08,444
-That's good, right?
-Yeah.
1068
01:05:08,513 --> 01:05:10,981
-What you said about
....
-Sure.
1069
01:05:11,549 --> 01:05:15,212
We had a sentimental moment.
He said something about giving a break.
1070
01:05:15,319 --> 01:05:19,756
l'm drinking the man's gin,
so l think the rest of you can call it a day.
1071
01:05:19,824 --> 01:05:21,815
-You got the job!
-l may be jumping.
1072
01:05:21,893 --> 01:05:24,418
-How do you do?
-This is my wife.
1073
01:05:24,495 --> 01:05:27,055
How do you do?
1074
01:05:27,932 --> 01:05:29,593
l think it's okay.
1075
01:05:30,034 --> 01:05:30,693
Here we go.
1076
01:05:30,768 --> 01:05:35,205
Here's a blank embryo key.
We put the original in here.
1077
01:05:35,606 --> 01:05:40,168
Lock the little key in there,
and then we put the one...
1078
01:05:40,244 --> 01:05:42,644
that you're gonna have done right in there.
1079
01:05:42,713 --> 01:05:44,943
Then we do that, press that...
1080
01:05:45,583 --> 01:05:47,517
and let it go on its own.
1081
01:05:51,556 --> 01:05:53,717
l can almost sing what it says now.
1082
01:05:55,426 --> 01:05:57,587
Believe it or not, that is done.
1083
01:05:58,229 --> 01:06:02,097
-That's quick, too.
-Yeah. lt's quick. Quick as a flash.
1084
01:06:03,100 --> 01:06:06,069
God. Here we are. There's the original.
1085
01:06:06,137 --> 01:06:08,367
Now, it's got
a few bits and pieces on here.
1086
01:06:08,439 --> 01:06:11,840
And l'll just take this off
and make sure you can get in the door.
1087
01:06:11,909 --> 01:06:15,504
Otherwise, you wouldn't
be able to move it in there.
1088
01:06:15,580 --> 01:06:18,481
You see? Here we are.
1089
01:06:21,953 --> 01:06:24,421
You might have to jiggle it a bit
....
1090
01:06:26,791 --> 01:06:28,691
Be sure to save your receipt.
1091
01:06:30,428 --> 01:06:34,159
Excuse me. Would this work
on fabricated half-inch pipe?
1092
01:06:34,298 --> 01:06:37,699
Are you kidding? This thing was made
for fabricated half-inch pipe.
1093
01:06:37,768 --> 01:06:40,635
This thing's middle name
is fabricated half-inch pipe.
1094
01:06:40,705 --> 01:06:44,072
Fabricated half-inch pipe.
Watch out! Here comes its thing!
1095
01:06:44,909 --> 01:06:46,843
What's wrong with you?
1096
01:06:47,144 --> 01:06:49,476
Nothing. l've just gone all day
without a nap.
1097
01:06:50,982 --> 01:06:53,143
lt's $8.99 plus tax.
1098
01:06:53,651 --> 01:06:56,711
$8.99 plus tax.
1099
01:06:58,422 --> 01:06:59,514
Total
....
1100
01:07:04,295 --> 01:07:06,229
Open up.
1101
01:07:09,233 --> 01:07:10,962
Amityville cash register.
1102
01:07:11,369 --> 01:07:14,429
Forget it. Life's too short.
1103
01:07:14,672 --> 01:07:16,139
Hi. Can l help you?
1104
01:07:16,240 --> 01:07:18,708
What is fabricated half-inch pipe, anyway?
1105
01:07:23,347 --> 01:07:25,872
-Hank.
-Arthur, do you have a minute?
1106
01:07:26,417 --> 01:07:30,353
Yeah, sure.
Yeah. Great. No problems at all.
1107
01:07:30,888 --> 01:07:32,913
There is one thing.
Hardly worth mentioning.
1108
01:07:32,990 --> 01:07:34,855
l can't get these stupid machines to work.
1109
01:07:34,926 --> 01:07:38,418
Arthur, l'm sorry. l've got some bad news.
1110
01:07:39,163 --> 01:07:40,858
l have to let you go.
1111
01:07:42,900 --> 01:07:45,061
But wait a minute, l just got here, Hank.
1112
01:07:45,136 --> 01:07:46,763
You said you'd give me a chance.
1113
01:07:46,837 --> 01:07:48,134
No, it's not me.
1114
01:07:48,706 --> 01:07:51,641
The store's just been sold,
and the new owner wants you out.
1115
01:07:51,709 --> 01:07:54,337
He mentioned you by name.
l'll probably be next.
1116
01:07:54,412 --> 01:07:58,178
l don't understand it myself.
Here, maybe this will help.
1117
01:07:58,249 --> 01:08:01,150
No. l've just been here half a day.
1118
01:08:01,686 --> 01:08:03,745
l think l broke your cash register.
1119
01:08:03,821 --> 01:08:05,118
Go on. Take it.
1120
01:08:06,057 --> 01:08:07,319
l feel awful.
1121
01:08:11,929 --> 01:08:13,260
Thanks, Hank.
1122
01:08:16,133 --> 01:08:17,498
l'll pay you back.
1123
01:08:26,911 --> 01:08:30,312
Come in, Mr. Butterworth.
The door is open.
1124
01:08:37,955 --> 01:08:39,513
Hello, Linda.
1125
01:08:42,493 --> 01:08:45,951
You're not Mr. Butterworth.
l can tell by the coat.
1126
01:08:48,132 --> 01:08:49,360
What do you want?
1127
01:08:49,700 --> 01:08:51,327
l think we should talk.
1128
01:08:51,469 --> 01:08:52,527
Really?
1129
01:08:53,504 --> 01:08:57,099
l tell you, l'm really busy.
l'm redecorating, as you can tell...
1130
01:08:57,174 --> 01:08:59,540
and
House Beautiful is coming
at any minute.
1131
01:08:59,610 --> 01:09:00,702
l see.
1132
01:09:00,778 --> 01:09:03,338
lt's so...you.
1133
01:09:09,020 --> 01:09:12,683
Look, if you just dropped by to see
if Arthur and l are falling apart...
1134
01:09:12,757 --> 01:09:14,418
you're gonna be disappointed.
1135
01:09:14,492 --> 01:09:15,857
We're doing fine.
1136
01:09:16,293 --> 01:09:18,261
We're together. We're happy.
1137
01:09:20,164 --> 01:09:22,155
And Arthur got a job.
1138
01:09:22,666 --> 01:09:25,464
By the way, Arthur's been fired.
1139
01:09:26,837 --> 01:09:28,668
My father bought that store.
1140
01:09:29,540 --> 01:09:32,600
lt's going to be very difficult
for him to find a job anywhere...
1141
01:09:32,676 --> 01:09:34,200
with my father around.
1142
01:09:34,278 --> 01:09:37,645
You see, Daddy doesn't know
the meaning of the word ''surrender.''
1143
01:09:38,682 --> 01:09:39,774
Yeah.
1144
01:09:41,419 --> 01:09:44,479
l'm sure the word ''decency''
would stump him, too.
1145
01:09:45,623 --> 01:09:48,057
Linda, let's get to the bottom line.
1146
01:09:49,060 --> 01:09:51,119
Arthur can't survive without the money.
1147
01:09:51,195 --> 01:09:54,323
Money is like air to him.
He needs it to breathe.
1148
01:09:54,698 --> 01:09:57,292
-He's dying, Linda.
-Just a minute.
1149
01:09:58,202 --> 01:10:00,193
What makes you think
you can walk in here...
1150
01:10:00,271 --> 01:10:02,432
and talk about my family like that?
1151
01:10:04,008 --> 01:10:07,842
You have no idea what Arthur needs...
1152
01:10:09,180 --> 01:10:10,909
what will make him happy.
1153
01:10:11,816 --> 01:10:13,943
You just care about what you want.
1154
01:10:14,051 --> 01:10:15,780
What's good for you.
1155
01:10:16,921 --> 01:10:19,651
You people think you can buy everything.
1156
01:10:19,723 --> 01:10:23,386
You can't buy me,
and my husband's not for sale.
1157
01:10:24,428 --> 01:10:26,362
Now, this conversation is over.
1158
01:10:26,430 --> 01:10:29,593
There's the door, or l can throw you
out the window. lt's up to you.
1159
01:10:29,667 --> 01:10:31,032
And another thing.
1160
01:10:31,102 --> 01:10:34,560
We both know that being a father
would be wonderful for Arthur.
1161
01:10:34,672 --> 01:10:37,800
lt would give him the kind of stability
he so desperately needs...
1162
01:10:37,875 --> 01:10:39,809
and it would give him an heir.
1163
01:10:42,847 --> 01:10:45,407
l have heard about your...problem.
1164
01:10:46,217 --> 01:10:49,482
-What problem?
-l can have children.
1165
01:10:49,854 --> 01:10:52,288
l'm as fertile as the Napa Valley.
1166
01:10:56,093 --> 01:10:59,153
lf you love Arthur, and l believe you do...
1167
01:10:59,430 --> 01:11:02,263
then l know you'll do what's best for him.
1168
01:11:09,306 --> 01:11:12,298
l've got to run. Let's have lunch sometime.
1169
01:11:12,977 --> 01:11:14,069
Uptown.
1170
01:11:34,064 --> 01:11:35,725
Arthur.
1171
01:11:37,902 --> 01:11:40,097
Who needed that job anyway?
1172
01:11:41,138 --> 01:11:45,336
l can't believe that man complained
about that lovely new key.
1173
01:11:45,476 --> 01:11:47,273
Hi, Mr. Butterworth. How are you?
1174
01:11:47,344 --> 01:11:50,211
Very fine, thank you.
l'll have a drink, thank you.
1175
01:11:52,449 --> 01:11:56,112
Hello, Mr. Butterworth. How are you?
1176
01:11:56,187 --> 01:11:58,747
-What are you doing?
-Changing the lock.
1177
01:11:59,957 --> 01:12:03,415
-Why? Where's Linda?
-She's gone.
1178
01:12:03,861 --> 01:12:06,193
-What you mean she's gone?
-Canceled the lease.
1179
01:12:06,263 --> 01:12:07,696
Canceled the lease?
1180
01:12:07,932 --> 01:12:10,492
Here. She left you this.
1181
01:12:12,469 --> 01:12:15,529
Read it out loud. The radio's broken.
1182
01:12:18,809 --> 01:12:20,299
Bloody.
1183
01:12:23,647 --> 01:12:25,410
''Dearest Arthur.''
1184
01:12:25,749 --> 01:12:27,410
That's a good start.
1185
01:12:29,687 --> 01:12:31,587
''l can't stay anymore.
1186
01:12:34,091 --> 01:12:35,683
''l realize now...
1187
01:12:36,193 --> 01:12:38,286
''that Johnson will never give up.
1188
01:12:40,598 --> 01:12:43,192
''l can't bear to see you suffer like this.
1189
01:12:44,168 --> 01:12:45,999
''l know it's because of me.''
1190
01:12:46,070 --> 01:12:47,560
lt's not because
....
1191
01:12:51,909 --> 01:12:54,400
''l've never been very good at good-byes...
1192
01:12:57,147 --> 01:12:58,171
''Arthur...
1193
01:12:59,183 --> 01:13:02,016
''so l'll just say that l love you
and adore you...
1194
01:13:02,086 --> 01:13:04,850
''and l always will.
1195
01:13:05,256 --> 01:13:06,348
''Linda.''
1196
01:13:07,057 --> 01:13:09,821
Sort of goes downhill, doesn't it?
1197
01:13:14,398 --> 01:13:18,027
Come on, Ralph. l know she's in there.
Just let me talk to her.
1198
01:13:18,402 --> 01:13:20,666
l'm not here.
1199
01:13:21,538 --> 01:13:22,698
She's not here.
1200
01:13:22,773 --> 01:13:24,502
Just tell him to go away.
1201
01:13:25,676 --> 01:13:27,371
She says go away.
1202
01:13:27,711 --> 01:13:30,703
How can she say go away
if she's not there?
1203
01:13:33,917 --> 01:13:36,681
l'd ask her, but she's not here.
1204
01:13:37,788 --> 01:13:38,948
God.
1205
01:13:39,657 --> 01:13:42,285
Arthur, take care of yourself.
1206
01:13:50,200 --> 01:13:53,101
Beautiful. Good.
1207
01:13:53,170 --> 01:13:56,105
The brother-in-law's over with the dog.
1208
01:13:58,275 --> 01:14:02,439
She sends my own kid over to me
to ask me for money for them.
1209
01:14:02,513 --> 01:14:05,175
So l say, ''Give me a break.
l'm out of work.''
1210
01:14:06,650 --> 01:14:08,015
You in the coat.
1211
01:14:10,587 --> 01:14:12,282
-What?
-Don't l know you?
1212
01:14:13,123 --> 01:14:14,215
No.
1213
01:14:17,961 --> 01:14:21,089
Yeah, l know you.
1214
01:14:21,265 --> 01:14:24,325
Yeah. Hi, how are you?
1215
01:14:24,535 --> 01:14:27,971
l know this guy. We go back a long time.
1216
01:14:28,038 --> 01:14:30,097
l know this guy.
1217
01:14:30,908 --> 01:14:32,239
l know you.
1218
01:14:32,309 --> 01:14:35,836
l delivered some stuff to your house.
1219
01:14:36,980 --> 01:14:38,641
l hope l tipped you.
1220
01:14:38,716 --> 01:14:41,742
Yeah, sure. He's funny.
1221
01:14:41,885 --> 01:14:45,821
-You used to have a butler.
-Fairchild.
1222
01:14:47,324 --> 01:14:50,782
He used to come in,
and he would take his pulse...
1223
01:14:50,861 --> 01:14:53,022
and put mirrors under his nose and shit...
1224
01:14:53,097 --> 01:14:55,190
to see if he was still breathing.
1225
01:14:56,233 --> 01:15:00,966
-You were terrific. You were funny.
-Nice guy, Fairchild.
1226
01:15:01,238 --> 01:15:02,671
This is nice.
1227
01:15:02,740 --> 01:15:05,004
So you had money or something?
You were rich?
1228
01:15:05,075 --> 01:15:08,806
Yeah. Very rich. $750 million.
1229
01:15:11,048 --> 01:15:15,075
And this was back when $750 million
was considered a lot of money.
1230
01:15:18,555 --> 01:15:20,079
Yeah.
1231
01:15:20,157 --> 01:15:23,524
l used to buy a new couch every week
to match the
TV Guide.
1232
01:15:26,063 --> 01:15:27,121
l'm dying here.
1233
01:15:27,197 --> 01:15:29,529
l was rolling in it.
1234
01:15:29,600 --> 01:15:32,865
l used to buy a new couch every week
to match the
TV Guide.
1235
01:15:34,638 --> 01:15:36,367
You heard that one before?
1236
01:15:38,809 --> 01:15:40,640
What happened? l don't understand.
1237
01:15:40,711 --> 01:15:42,679
l lost it all.
1238
01:15:44,448 --> 01:15:47,815
-$750 million.
-Jesus.
1239
01:15:48,852 --> 01:15:50,444
l just don't know where it is.
1240
01:15:50,554 --> 01:15:54,115
l've looked everywhere. Under the couch,
behind the refrigerator.
1241
01:15:55,058 --> 01:15:58,152
Didn't l tell you? The guy is funny.
1242
01:15:58,662 --> 01:16:01,995
Tell them what you told me
about the half-inch pipe.
1243
01:16:02,232 --> 01:16:05,463
Yeah. Fabricated half-inch pipe.
1244
01:16:06,270 --> 01:16:08,500
What was the tool
that you used with that?
1245
01:16:08,872 --> 01:16:10,840
-Fabricated half-inch--
-What kind of tool?
1246
01:16:10,908 --> 01:16:13,069
-Yeah, what kind of tool?
-You need a ratchet.
1247
01:16:13,143 --> 01:16:16,112
-What do you know about pipes?
-l used to do toilets.
1248
01:16:16,947 --> 01:16:20,644
-What kind of tool was it?
-You take both hands and grab it.
1249
01:16:20,717 --> 01:16:23,481
lt's time for me
to shout ''Europe'' at the sink.
1250
01:16:23,587 --> 01:16:25,487
-Shout what?
-Shout ''Europe'' at the sink.
1251
01:16:25,556 --> 01:16:26,614
''Europe'' who?
1252
01:16:26,690 --> 01:16:28,214
You're up.
1253
01:16:30,494 --> 01:16:34,521
-l'm dying. Doesn't he kill you?
-Where did you find this guy?
1254
01:16:37,067 --> 01:16:39,001
Play something.
1255
01:16:41,238 --> 01:16:42,227
Sit down!
1256
01:16:43,140 --> 01:16:45,973
Have l got time, l ask myself.
1257
01:16:46,844 --> 01:16:48,869
Hold on. All right.
1258
01:16:56,687 --> 01:16:59,918
Where is my fabricated half-inch pipe?
1259
01:17:03,360 --> 01:17:06,625
Give me my fabricated half-inch pipe
1260
01:17:08,899 --> 01:17:13,336
Please give me that old
fabricated half-inch pipe
1261
01:17:13,937 --> 01:17:18,306
And l'll beat the crap out of you
1262
01:17:18,842 --> 01:17:20,935
l'll beat the crap out of you!
1263
01:17:26,617 --> 01:17:28,050
He's beautiful.
1264
01:17:29,319 --> 01:17:33,551
You got two burgers and a lunch special
and fries coming up, okay?
1265
01:17:36,693 --> 01:17:39,594
-Coffee.
-ls this decaf?
1266
01:17:40,030 --> 01:17:41,395
No. Did you ask for decaf?
1267
01:17:41,465 --> 01:17:43,933
l asked you twice for decaf.
ls that a problem here?
1268
01:17:44,001 --> 01:17:46,469
A little water would be nice, too,
if you're not busy.
1269
01:17:46,537 --> 01:17:48,471
-You want to fight?
-No.
1270
01:17:48,539 --> 01:17:51,565
l just can't drink this stuff, gives me gas.
1271
01:17:52,042 --> 01:17:53,509
Sorry to hear that.
1272
01:17:57,915 --> 01:17:59,382
Are you okay?
1273
01:18:00,751 --> 01:18:01,843
Yeah.
1274
01:18:02,519 --> 01:18:05,579
-Anything l can do for you?
-No, honey. l'm fine.
1275
01:18:07,057 --> 01:18:09,457
Honey. Where's my hamburger?
1276
01:18:10,494 --> 01:18:12,485
l honestly don't know.
1277
01:18:12,863 --> 01:18:15,957
''l've never been very good at good-byes...
1278
01:18:16,199 --> 01:18:17,496
''Arthur...
1279
01:18:19,136 --> 01:18:22,401
''so l'll just say that l love you...
1280
01:18:23,240 --> 01:18:25,174
''and adore you...
1281
01:18:25,642 --> 01:18:27,701
''and always will.
1282
01:18:29,012 --> 01:18:30,138
''Linda.''
1283
01:18:30,747 --> 01:18:34,239
Man, l'm tired of hearing you
read that stuff.
1284
01:18:34,718 --> 01:18:36,845
Ain't you got anything else to do?
1285
01:18:37,321 --> 01:18:39,186
''Dearest Arthur...
1286
01:18:40,791 --> 01:18:42,759
''l can't stay anymore.''
1287
01:18:44,595 --> 01:18:46,995
Frank. Let me tell you something.
1288
01:18:48,332 --> 01:18:49,526
Hi.
1289
01:18:52,569 --> 01:18:55,367
-Want a drink?
-Thank you. ln a moment.
1290
01:18:57,541 --> 01:18:59,008
''Dearest Arthur...
1291
01:19:02,412 --> 01:19:04,778
''l can't stay anymore.
1292
01:19:05,816 --> 01:19:06,908
''l
....''
1293
01:19:11,655 --> 01:19:14,283
-What are you doing?
-lt's my car. l saw it first.
1294
01:19:14,358 --> 01:19:18,226
You've been copping all my business.
You take a walk!
1295
01:19:18,295 --> 01:19:21,355
l'll take the yellow car.
Nicer class of person altogether.
1296
01:19:21,431 --> 01:19:25,458
-Get out of here. Get a job.
-l got a job. l had one.
1297
01:19:25,535 --> 01:19:27,230
The cash register wouldn't open.
1298
01:19:27,304 --> 01:19:30,102
Nice type of person. Let's have lunch!
1299
01:19:30,674 --> 01:19:33,643
There's nothing like being
in the middle of the road.
1300
01:19:33,877 --> 01:19:36,277
Big car. Lovely.
1301
01:19:36,747 --> 01:19:37,873
Mr. Bach.
1302
01:19:37,948 --> 01:19:39,848
Bitterman! How the hell are you?
1303
01:19:39,916 --> 01:19:41,850
Sir, is that you? What are you doing here?
1304
01:19:41,918 --> 01:19:44,512
They said l'd never make it, Bitterman.
1305
01:19:44,588 --> 01:19:48,149
They said the city would eat me alive.
Now look at me. l have my own pail.
1306
01:19:48,225 --> 01:19:51,023
l have my own squeegee sponge.
l showed them all.
1307
01:19:51,161 --> 01:19:52,492
Sir, can l give you some help?
1308
01:19:52,562 --> 01:19:54,052
No, l don't need any help.
1309
01:19:54,131 --> 01:19:56,599
l've washed windshields
10 times dirtier than this.
1310
01:19:56,667 --> 01:19:57,861
Martha !
1311
01:19:57,934 --> 01:20:00,266
-Arthur, what are you doing?
-l was just washing--
1312
01:20:00,337 --> 01:20:02,498
Are you going to marry
Susan Johnson or not?
1313
01:20:02,572 --> 01:20:05,063
Listen, l told you l can't.
You don't seem to--
1314
01:20:05,142 --> 01:20:06,632
Get the thing out of my face.
1315
01:20:06,710 --> 01:20:07,734
l'm sorry.
1316
01:20:07,811 --> 01:20:11,440
Enough is enough, Arthur. Marry the bitch.
1317
01:20:12,182 --> 01:20:14,878
You marry her, Martha !
1318
01:20:15,152 --> 01:20:16,517
Holy
....
1319
01:20:50,454 --> 01:20:55,289
Of course, my family, the Bach family,
owns about 40% .
1320
01:20:55,792 --> 01:20:57,419
Exactly 40% .
1321
01:20:57,494 --> 01:21:00,190
We each own 40% .
1322
01:21:00,831 --> 01:21:03,925
And then, of course, Mr. Johnson...
1323
01:21:04,101 --> 01:21:06,160
old clever dick...
1324
01:21:06,236 --> 01:21:10,138
he bought up
the controlling interest, 20% ...
1325
01:21:10,207 --> 01:21:14,268
because he wants me to marry Susan,
but l don't love Susan.
1326
01:21:15,145 --> 01:21:18,740
Right. l don't want to talk about it.
You're quite right.
1327
01:21:18,815 --> 01:21:21,682
Then Mrs. Canby
....
1328
01:21:21,952 --> 01:21:26,753
Mrs. Canby said l needed a job.
But the cash register would not open.
1329
01:21:27,457 --> 01:21:30,756
Yeah. Absolutely.
lt was a very quiet cash register.
1330
01:21:31,528 --> 01:21:33,257
Very, very quiet.
1331
01:21:33,396 --> 01:21:37,662
Then Linda left me a note.
1332
01:21:37,734 --> 01:21:40,294
l've got it. lt's not too long.
l'll read it to you.
1333
01:21:40,370 --> 01:21:41,894
Hello, Arthur.
1334
01:21:44,207 --> 01:21:45,640
Hob
....
1335
01:21:48,478 --> 01:21:52,244
Yes, very well put.
Brevity is the soul of wit.
1336
01:21:52,549 --> 01:21:53,743
Hobson?
1337
01:21:57,020 --> 01:21:59,545
-But you're
....
-Dead.
1338
01:22:00,157 --> 01:22:01,681
Yes, l am dead.
1339
01:22:01,758 --> 01:22:03,851
How tactful of you to mention it.
1340
01:22:03,927 --> 01:22:07,260
Our little conversation is off
to a most auspicious start.
1341
01:22:09,266 --> 01:22:10,756
So this is
....
1342
01:22:12,369 --> 01:22:15,099
What? A dream?
1343
01:22:16,506 --> 01:22:18,201
A dream? Perhaps.
1344
01:22:19,242 --> 01:22:22,040
My money would be on a drunken stupor.
1345
01:22:22,112 --> 01:22:23,773
What can l do, Hobson?
1346
01:22:23,847 --> 01:22:26,111
l mean, what would you do
if you were me?
1347
01:22:26,183 --> 01:22:28,743
The word ''bathe'' comes to mind.
1348
01:22:29,786 --> 01:22:33,119
l was sorry to hear
about you and Linda, Arthur.
1349
01:22:34,157 --> 01:22:37,092
-A wife like that is hard to find.
-Still is.
1350
01:22:41,364 --> 01:22:43,525
Come on, Hobson. lt's a joke.
1351
01:22:43,600 --> 01:22:45,864
What's the matter,
you don't get it, Hobson?
1352
01:22:45,936 --> 01:22:49,804
Well, of course,
the crematorium fried your brain.
1353
01:22:49,873 --> 01:22:53,331
l keep forgetting you don't have
a sense of humor anymore.
1354
01:22:53,410 --> 01:22:57,244
-Come on, fellow. Let's move along.
-All right.
1355
01:23:00,350 --> 01:23:02,341
God, l've missed you, Hobson.
1356
01:23:02,419 --> 01:23:05,479
-l've never been far.
-Yeah. l've felt that.
1357
01:23:05,555 --> 01:23:08,183
l've had my eye on you, Arthur.
1358
01:23:08,258 --> 01:23:10,658
You cannot imagine how proud l've been...
1359
01:23:10,727 --> 01:23:13,560
watching you rooting through
garbage cans...
1360
01:23:13,630 --> 01:23:15,996
searching out discarded McNugget boxes.
1361
01:23:16,066 --> 01:23:18,125
-You saw that.
-Yes.
1362
01:23:18,602 --> 01:23:21,264
lf projectile vomiting
ever becomes an Olympic event...
1363
01:23:21,338 --> 01:23:22,930
you'll do your country proud.
1364
01:23:23,006 --> 01:23:27,067
l'm trying, you know.
Yesterday l sold some blood at a hospital.
1365
01:23:27,310 --> 01:23:28,572
Hospital?
1366
01:23:28,645 --> 01:23:32,240
l should have thought a local distillery
would have paid you much more.
1367
01:23:32,582 --> 01:23:35,278
How have l gotten along
without you, Hobson?
1368
01:23:35,352 --> 01:23:39,186
-Obviously not very well.
-l wouldn't say that, Hobson.
1369
01:23:56,573 --> 01:23:58,473
l love the circus.
1370
01:24:00,644 --> 01:24:03,738
Remember you used to bring me here
every year, Hobson?
1371
01:24:04,581 --> 01:24:08,244
l used to try and run up to all the clowns
and squeeze their noses.
1372
01:24:08,318 --> 01:24:10,878
After the age of 30,
it becomes a bit embarrassing.
1373
01:24:10,954 --> 01:24:13,582
Really? Did l embarrass you, Hobson?
1374
01:24:13,657 --> 01:24:15,784
Only every waking moment.
1375
01:24:24,167 --> 01:24:26,863
Why do women wear so much makeup?
1376
01:24:26,937 --> 01:24:29,497
l find it so unappealing.
What do you think, Hobson?
1377
01:24:29,572 --> 01:24:31,904
l think l've come just in time.
1378
01:24:37,547 --> 01:24:41,415
Get out and stay out!
l better not catch you here again.
1379
01:24:50,126 --> 01:24:53,493
-lsn't this where Miss Johnson lives?
-That's right.
1380
01:24:54,164 --> 01:24:57,361
-So you're giving up.
-Absolutely.
1381
01:24:57,667 --> 01:24:59,726
Absolutely. l'm giving up.
1382
01:25:00,136 --> 01:25:02,900
l'm cutting my losses. l'm quitting.
1383
01:25:02,973 --> 01:25:05,032
Of course you are.
Why break with tradition?
1384
01:25:05,108 --> 01:25:06,666
May l help you?
1385
01:25:07,978 --> 01:25:10,139
Yeah. Yes.
1386
01:25:13,883 --> 01:25:17,250
ls Susan Johnson in?
l've come to marry the bitch.
1387
01:25:18,822 --> 01:25:20,790
ls Miss Johnson a friend of yours?
1388
01:25:20,857 --> 01:25:23,257
That's a most perceptive question.
1389
01:25:23,326 --> 01:25:26,921
Cuts right to the heart of the matter,
doesn't it, Arthur?
1390
01:25:33,536 --> 01:25:34,696
Yeah.
1391
01:25:37,107 --> 01:25:40,702
You're right. She's no friend of mine.
1392
01:25:42,946 --> 01:25:44,743
What am l doing here?
1393
01:25:44,814 --> 01:25:48,443
She isn't even a friend of mine,
and l'm thinking of marrying her?
1394
01:25:49,919 --> 01:25:51,648
God. Thank you.
1395
01:25:51,721 --> 01:25:54,849
Thank you both. You two were terrific.
1396
01:25:54,924 --> 01:25:58,052
Honestly, this was better
than 20 years in therapy.
1397
01:25:58,528 --> 01:26:02,726
Thank you so much.
You ought to have your own TV show...
1398
01:26:02,799 --> 01:26:05,324
or at the very least
not have to wear that hat.
1399
01:26:05,402 --> 01:26:09,304
Come on, Hobson. God, l nearly
....
Can you believe that?
1400
01:26:09,973 --> 01:26:12,635
l almost went in there
and asked her to marry me.
1401
01:27:03,259 --> 01:27:06,353
Arthur. Wake up, Arthur.
1402
01:27:06,963 --> 01:27:09,124
Plenty of time to sleep later.
1403
01:27:13,036 --> 01:27:15,095
What a delightful place.
1404
01:27:15,171 --> 01:27:18,572
How nice of them to let you in
without a reservation.
1405
01:27:20,944 --> 01:27:23,538
Kicking the bucket
hasn't changed you a bit, has it?
1406
01:27:23,613 --> 01:27:25,843
You! Could you keep it down?
1407
01:27:26,649 --> 01:27:30,278
lf you don't mind, l'm talking
to my butler whom l haven't seen...
1408
01:27:30,353 --> 01:27:32,321
since he passed away five years ago.
1409
01:27:32,388 --> 01:27:37,052
Yeah, l'm playing blackjack
with Uncle Rudy who died in 1956.
1410
01:27:37,293 --> 01:27:40,319
But at least he has the decency
to keep quiet.
1411
01:27:40,530 --> 01:27:42,555
Okay, Uncle Rudy, hit me.
1412
01:27:43,399 --> 01:27:45,594
What does that tell you?
1413
01:27:45,668 --> 01:27:46,896
Hit me!
1414
01:27:51,574 --> 01:27:54,008
-Maybe we should go somewhere else.
-Yes.
1415
01:27:54,077 --> 01:27:56,910
lf possible, somewhere upwind.
1416
01:27:58,281 --> 01:28:02,217
-God. Look at me, Hobson.
-No, thank you.
1417
01:28:02,285 --> 01:28:04,412
You can get us out, right?
1418
01:28:04,487 --> 01:28:07,888
l'm not on salary anymore, Arthur.
You're on your own.
1419
01:28:08,558 --> 01:28:11,721
The fact is, l've got to leave you shortly.
1420
01:28:11,794 --> 01:28:13,728
They only gave me a half day.
1421
01:28:13,796 --> 01:28:16,788
No, Hobson! No, you can't.
1422
01:28:17,567 --> 01:28:20,798
You're all l've got. l've lost Linda...
1423
01:28:20,870 --> 01:28:24,931
l've lost all the money.
l'm a drowning man, Hobson.
1424
01:28:27,277 --> 01:28:31,077
l wish l were dead. No offense.
1425
01:28:31,648 --> 01:28:33,047
None taken.
1426
01:28:34,684 --> 01:28:36,914
You spoiled little shit.
1427
01:28:37,120 --> 01:28:40,453
You thought your life
was going to be one big party, didn't you?
1428
01:28:40,523 --> 01:28:43,890
Now you know. Parties don't last forever.
1429
01:28:47,230 --> 01:28:50,996
l don't want you to end up here, Arthur...
1430
01:28:51,067 --> 01:28:54,503
sleeping alone,
playing blackjack with Uncle Rudy.
1431
01:28:54,571 --> 01:28:56,232
l can't bear that.
1432
01:28:57,707 --> 01:29:00,938
l've told you before
you can do anything with your life...
1433
01:29:01,010 --> 01:29:02,671
that you want to.
1434
01:29:04,414 --> 01:29:06,746
Stop your drinking, Arthur.
1435
01:29:11,421 --> 01:29:13,582
Why should l bother?
1436
01:29:14,023 --> 01:29:16,014
Give me one good reason.
1437
01:29:17,894 --> 01:29:19,657
l've seen your son.
1438
01:29:26,769 --> 01:29:30,205
-You've seen
....
-He's a splendid boy, wonderful.
1439
01:29:31,841 --> 01:29:33,604
Bright blue eyes.
1440
01:29:33,743 --> 01:29:35,677
He smiles all the time.
1441
01:29:36,579 --> 01:29:39,013
l like him, Arthur. You will, too.
1442
01:29:42,585 --> 01:29:45,019
Old man, you're not playing fair.
1443
01:29:45,655 --> 01:29:48,089
l've told him all about you, Arthur...
1444
01:29:48,157 --> 01:29:51,183
but he wants to meet you all the same.
1445
01:29:57,567 --> 01:29:59,501
lt's up to you, Arthur.
1446
01:30:01,371 --> 01:30:03,566
lt always has been.
1447
01:30:04,507 --> 01:30:06,475
-Blackjack.
-What?
1448
01:30:06,542 --> 01:30:08,373
l said, ''blackjack.''
1449
01:30:55,391 --> 01:30:58,258
Come on, Martha, shake and move!
1450
01:30:58,328 --> 01:31:02,628
Move it!
Shake those buns! Shake those bones!
1451
01:31:03,299 --> 01:31:06,029
Move it! Get the arms going!
1452
01:31:11,207 --> 01:31:12,697
Martha.
1453
01:31:14,344 --> 01:31:19,077
-Martha, l have to talk to you.
-Arthur, l'm in the middle of a workout.
1454
01:31:19,148 --> 01:31:22,242
-l understand that--
-lt's okay, Martha.
1455
01:31:22,819 --> 01:31:26,277
Why don't we take a break?
You look a little bit tired.
1456
01:31:27,490 --> 01:31:29,958
l'll be in the next room if you want me.
1457
01:31:30,026 --> 01:31:32,153
Of course l want him...
1458
01:31:33,162 --> 01:31:35,562
but it would probably kill me.
1459
01:31:36,099 --> 01:31:38,431
Arthur, what's happened to you?
1460
01:31:39,102 --> 01:31:42,265
You've changed. Are you taller?
1461
01:31:43,339 --> 01:31:47,139
l feel taller, Martha.
Unless, of course, you're shrinking.
1462
01:31:52,582 --> 01:31:56,882
You know, a few years ago,
Linda bought a scrapbook.
1463
01:31:59,288 --> 01:32:02,485
And she wanted
a picture of me and my father.
1464
01:32:03,493 --> 01:32:06,428
Now, l looked everywhere...
1465
01:32:07,897 --> 01:32:09,922
and l couldn't find one.
1466
01:32:10,700 --> 01:32:13,692
Not one of us together, you know.
1467
01:32:14,137 --> 01:32:15,832
We never did anything together.
1468
01:32:15,905 --> 01:32:18,271
We never shared anything.
1469
01:32:20,376 --> 01:32:23,812
Now l know l can do better, Martha,
l know that now.
1470
01:32:23,880 --> 01:32:27,976
l can be a better father than he was.
But l can't do anything.
1471
01:32:28,050 --> 01:32:29,779
l am paralyzed...
1472
01:32:29,852 --> 01:32:32,514
as long as Burt Johnson is on my back.
1473
01:32:33,189 --> 01:32:37,057
But, Arthur, l've told you before.
l can't do anything to help you.
1474
01:32:37,126 --> 01:32:39,959
-Martha, there must be--
-But if l were you...
1475
01:32:40,029 --> 01:32:42,520
and 30 years younger...
1476
01:32:42,598 --> 01:32:45,590
l'd try to find a man called...
1477
01:32:48,638 --> 01:32:50,435
Noah Curtis.
1478
01:32:51,007 --> 01:32:54,408
He and Burt Johnson
used to be partners in business.
1479
01:32:54,477 --> 01:32:56,809
Then they had some sort of a falling-out.
1480
01:32:56,879 --> 01:33:01,612
lf Johnson has a skeleton in his closet,
Curtis would know.
1481
01:33:03,286 --> 01:33:05,345
Noah Curtis, Martha?
1482
01:33:08,257 --> 01:33:09,281
Thank you.
1483
01:33:21,170 --> 01:33:22,831
Mr. Bach?
1484
01:33:27,243 --> 01:33:29,507
l am Noah Curtis' son.
1485
01:33:30,480 --> 01:33:32,505
My father died last year.
1486
01:33:33,182 --> 01:33:35,707
After what Burt Johnson did to him...
1487
01:33:35,785 --> 01:33:38,777
l'll do anything to help nail that thief.
1488
01:33:42,658 --> 01:33:46,958
Here's a list of names of people
involved in that deal.
1489
01:33:47,029 --> 01:33:49,896
Thank you. l guess
you'd be in a lot of trouble...
1490
01:33:49,966 --> 01:33:52,264
if they knew what you were doing.
1491
01:33:52,335 --> 01:33:54,269
No, not really.
1492
01:33:55,238 --> 01:33:58,799
Then why did you want to meet me here?
1493
01:33:59,308 --> 01:34:03,301
l park my car right over there.
Can l give you a lift somewhere?
1494
01:34:04,347 --> 01:34:08,078
-No. Thank you very much.
-Bye.
1495
01:34:35,144 --> 01:34:36,668
You made it.
1496
01:34:37,980 --> 01:34:40,414
You got the stuff?
1497
01:34:42,218 --> 01:34:46,587
l used to live at the Waldorf-Astoria
till Burt Johnson did this to me.
1498
01:34:47,423 --> 01:34:49,015
l've been waiting for years...
1499
01:34:49,091 --> 01:34:52,060
for somebody with enough guts
to take him on.
1500
01:34:53,296 --> 01:34:54,729
Here it is.
1501
01:34:56,032 --> 01:34:57,499
Good luck.
1502
01:35:14,617 --> 01:35:15,709
Thank you.
1503
01:35:32,768 --> 01:35:34,633
Look at the beautiful skyline.
1504
01:35:46,248 --> 01:35:47,510
Your name, sir?
1505
01:35:47,583 --> 01:35:51,781
Name? Roger Basinforth Cummings lll.
1506
01:35:53,122 --> 01:35:56,421
l'm sorry, buddy.
This is a private Christmas party.
1507
01:35:57,059 --> 01:35:59,755
-Merry Christmas to you, though.
-Merry Christmas.
1508
01:36:45,307 --> 01:36:46,638
Neil, Pat.
1509
01:36:46,709 --> 01:36:50,167
-l can't believe you came in from Texas.
-We're happy to be here.
1510
01:36:50,246 --> 01:36:52,214
-You've lost some weight.
-About 20 pounds.
1511
01:36:52,281 --> 01:36:54,112
Robin, how are you?
1512
01:36:55,151 --> 01:36:57,278
Thank you. Same to you.
1513
01:37:22,144 --> 01:37:24,772
Mr. Johnson, it's a wonderful party!
1514
01:37:24,847 --> 01:37:27,145
How are you? You're looking beautiful.
1515
01:37:27,216 --> 01:37:29,741
Thank you. You look pretty good yourself.
1516
01:37:29,819 --> 01:37:32,083
-Daddy.
-Sunshine girl.
1517
01:37:32,988 --> 01:37:35,957
-You did a beautiful job.
-Thank you. l'm glad you like it.
1518
01:37:36,025 --> 01:37:37,458
We have so many friends.
1519
01:38:08,791 --> 01:38:11,123
Burt, how the hell are you? You look great.
1520
01:38:11,193 --> 01:38:12,854
Arthur, what are you doing here?
1521
01:38:12,928 --> 01:38:16,694
l brought you a gift, Burt.
ls there somewhere we can talk?
1522
01:38:23,506 --> 01:38:26,634
l think so. You follow me.
Excuse me, gentlemen.
1523
01:38:30,179 --> 01:38:33,910
So you've finally come to your senses.
We'll resolve this quickly.
1524
01:38:33,983 --> 01:38:37,419
Then you can get a shave, clean up,
and join the party.
1525
01:38:37,520 --> 01:38:40,921
lt must have been awful out there,
alone in the cold.
1526
01:38:42,057 --> 01:38:45,185
l was out there in the cold,
but l wasn't alone.
1527
01:38:45,761 --> 01:38:47,490
-Arthur.
-Susan.
1528
01:38:47,897 --> 01:38:49,592
l knew you'd come.
1529
01:38:50,866 --> 01:38:54,165
l don't think l've ever seen you
while l'm sober.
1530
01:38:55,504 --> 01:38:59,702
You have a very beautiful face
when it isn't going in and out of focus.
1531
01:38:59,842 --> 01:39:03,403
-Now Arthur says he has a gift for me.
-What is it, Arthur?
1532
01:39:04,013 --> 01:39:08,950
lt's a little gift you might not like.
The Carlyle-Swinson buyout.
1533
01:39:09,718 --> 01:39:13,347
The fraud, the extortion, it's all here.
l've got Earl Swinson's notes...
1534
01:39:13,422 --> 01:39:17,017
financial records, everything.
Have a read. You might love it.
1535
01:39:17,993 --> 01:39:19,984
My, my, my.
1536
01:39:22,731 --> 01:39:26,895
That's very interesting.
You've certainly done your homework.
1537
01:39:26,969 --> 01:39:29,836
l don't want to send you to jail.
l just want what's mine...
1538
01:39:29,905 --> 01:39:33,136
plus a couple more of those
hors d'oeuvres, which are scrumptious.
1539
01:39:33,209 --> 01:39:35,302
Arthur, what's this all about?
1540
01:39:35,377 --> 01:39:38,869
Sunshine, don't you worry about anything.
Why don't you rejoin the party?
1541
01:39:38,948 --> 01:39:41,644
No. l think l'll stay.
1542
01:39:42,484 --> 01:39:45,112
Burt, we're waiting for you
to make the big toast.
1543
01:39:45,187 --> 01:39:47,553
Frankie, Morty, come on in here.
1544
01:39:49,158 --> 01:39:53,288
l want you to meet Arthur Bach,
Stanford's boy.
1545
01:39:53,796 --> 01:39:55,923
-The asshole?
-That's right.
1546
01:39:56,599 --> 01:39:59,591
Arthur has just told me
a very amusing story.
1547
01:39:59,668 --> 01:40:02,831
By the way, these gentlemen
are on my board of directors...
1548
01:40:02,905 --> 01:40:05,999
so why don't you just tell them
what you told me.
1549
01:40:08,544 --> 01:40:11,513
There was fraud...
1550
01:40:12,248 --> 01:40:13,681
committed by Mr. Johnson.
1551
01:40:13,749 --> 01:40:17,480
Now Arthur barges in here
and confronts me with evidence...
1552
01:40:17,820 --> 01:40:21,586
about the Carlyle-Swinson buyout.
Now, would you believe it?
1553
01:40:22,558 --> 01:40:25,322
What was that, 20 years ago?
1554
01:40:25,394 --> 01:40:28,124
l remember it. That was brilliant, Burt.
1555
01:40:28,197 --> 01:40:31,655
You floated 10,000 shares of stock
that never existed.
1556
01:40:31,967 --> 01:40:35,903
The Securities and Exchange Commission
never suspected a thing.
1557
01:40:36,005 --> 01:40:40,442
He can't be prosecuted for that.
The statute of limitations has run out.
1558
01:40:42,745 --> 01:40:45,373
Arthur, l think you could use a drink.
1559
01:40:46,081 --> 01:40:48,140
No, thanks. l don't drink.
1560
01:40:52,021 --> 01:40:54,012
Who said that?
1561
01:40:55,624 --> 01:40:58,388
All right.
Now, let's cut all this nonsense out.
1562
01:40:58,460 --> 01:41:00,860
When are we gonna set a date
for this wedding?
1563
01:41:00,930 --> 01:41:04,764
There's not going to be a wedding.
Don't you understand?
1564
01:41:06,235 --> 01:41:10,365
You're not going to screw up my family
the same way you screwed up yours.
1565
01:41:10,439 --> 01:41:12,202
l want my life back.
1566
01:41:12,574 --> 01:41:15,737
l want Linda. l want my son.
1567
01:41:23,218 --> 01:41:25,277
Arthur. You've killed him !
1568
01:41:27,723 --> 01:41:31,284
-Burt, are you all right?
-That concludes our presentation.
1569
01:41:31,360 --> 01:41:34,193
Thank you so much for coming.
Please drive carefully.
1570
01:41:34,263 --> 01:41:36,754
Come on, Burt. You're not hurt.
1571
01:41:37,833 --> 01:41:39,460
Give him back his money.
1572
01:41:39,535 --> 01:41:43,369
Arthur and l aren't right for each other.
l can see that now.
1573
01:41:43,639 --> 01:41:47,666
l'll show you something else
you can see right now.
1574
01:41:52,414 --> 01:41:55,645
-Wait!
-l should have killed you.
1575
01:41:55,818 --> 01:41:58,446
-l should have done it six years ago.
-Daddy, no.
1576
01:41:58,520 --> 01:42:02,012
-ls that a gun? That looks like--
-l'm tired of your crap, young man.
1577
01:42:02,091 --> 01:42:04,025
You two lovebirds are getting married.
1578
01:42:04,093 --> 01:42:07,187
-Got a tuxedo or want me to rent one?
-Daddy, put that thing away.
1579
01:42:07,262 --> 01:42:09,992
He hit me. Did you see him?
Nobody does that to me.
1580
01:42:10,065 --> 01:42:12,124
Okay, nobody yell ''pull.''
1581
01:42:12,301 --> 01:42:14,861
Daddy, he doesn't love me. lt's over.
1582
01:42:14,937 --> 01:42:16,700
Put that thing away.
1583
01:42:16,772 --> 01:42:21,209
Don't make me tell Mom about your
weekend ''business trips'' to Florida.
1584
01:42:25,514 --> 01:42:26,708
-You wouldn't.
-l would.
1585
01:42:26,782 --> 01:42:28,147
She would.
1586
01:42:32,488 --> 01:42:35,389
You can have the money. l don't care.
1587
01:42:37,826 --> 01:42:41,489
We'll keep all this
between ourselves, right, sunshine?
1588
01:42:45,801 --> 01:42:48,531
-Gentlemen, drinks are on me.
-He really is an asshole.
1589
01:42:48,604 --> 01:42:51,129
Come on, Arthur. l'll show you out.
1590
01:43:00,983 --> 01:43:03,747
-Thank you for in there.
-You're welcome.
1591
01:43:04,720 --> 01:43:07,280
-You know, it felt pretty good.
-Yeah.
1592
01:43:08,090 --> 01:43:09,785
You know, Susan, all in all...
1593
01:43:09,858 --> 01:43:13,259
this has probably been
our most successful date ever.
1594
01:43:14,263 --> 01:43:16,993
-You going to be all right?
-l think so.
1595
01:43:18,300 --> 01:43:20,234
Yeah. l think so, too.
1596
01:43:22,538 --> 01:43:23,903
Thank you.
1597
01:43:31,380 --> 01:43:32,711
Excuse me.
1598
01:43:53,702 --> 01:43:55,192
Wow! Look at this.
1599
01:44:02,444 --> 01:44:03,706
Cool.
1600
01:44:11,620 --> 01:44:13,986
-This is it, Bitterman.
-Now's the time.
1601
01:44:14,056 --> 01:44:15,318
Come on!
1602
01:44:55,030 --> 01:44:56,190
Great.
1603
01:45:31,166 --> 01:45:33,498
Nice car. Whose is it?
1604
01:45:34,636 --> 01:45:38,128
Arthur, you got everything back!
How did you do it?
1605
01:45:39,141 --> 01:45:40,608
l'll tell you later.
1606
01:45:40,709 --> 01:45:42,802
Right now, there's something
l've got to know.
1607
01:45:42,878 --> 01:45:45,312
-What?
-Who sent you all this crap?
1608
01:45:45,581 --> 01:45:47,481
Arthur, l missed you so much.
1609
01:45:56,258 --> 01:45:57,657
Hello there.
1610
01:46:00,128 --> 01:46:01,686
Mrs. Canby.
1611
01:46:11,707 --> 01:46:12,935
Arthur.
1612
01:46:14,910 --> 01:46:16,309
He's beautiful.
1613
01:46:16,378 --> 01:46:19,779
You've got the beautiful part right,
but it's not a ''he.''
1614
01:46:20,616 --> 01:46:23,449
What? A girl? Are you sure?
1615
01:46:23,518 --> 01:46:26,453
Honey, when a baby's born,
there's a visual test they do...
1616
01:46:26,521 --> 01:46:28,512
that's usually pretty accurate.
1617
01:46:29,725 --> 01:46:32,193
l know. lt's just that...
1618
01:46:32,527 --> 01:46:35,894
somebody l know had predicted a son.
1619
01:46:43,905 --> 01:46:47,033
-What, honey?
-l'm pregnant.
1620
01:46:54,716 --> 01:46:57,276
Mrs. Canby! Anybody else?
1621
01:46:58,754 --> 01:46:59,880
Bitterman.
1622
01:47:00,856 --> 01:47:04,417
Take me and my one, two,
l can't stand it...
1623
01:47:04,493 --> 01:47:07,087
my family home.
1624
01:47:08,196 --> 01:47:09,720
Surprise!
1625
01:47:11,199 --> 01:47:12,996
Hello. Arthur
....
1626
01:47:13,635 --> 01:47:16,331
Hello, Maria. How are you?
lt's nice to see you.
1627
01:47:16,405 --> 01:47:19,272
Hi, Maria. How are you?
Nice to see you again.
1628
01:47:19,341 --> 01:47:21,832
-Farnsworth, how are you?
-Welcome home, sir.
1629
01:47:21,910 --> 01:47:25,346
-Greta, l've got something for you.
-Two, sir?
1630
01:47:26,281 --> 01:47:30,115
-We'll explain later, Greta.
-Welcome home, sir.
1631
01:47:30,252 --> 01:47:33,278
Ames. Nice to see you.
Well done, Fairchild.
1632
01:47:33,955 --> 01:47:36,321
Thank you, sir.
Welcome home, sir. l missed you.
1633
01:47:36,391 --> 01:47:38,621
l've missed you, too, Fairchild.
Merry Christmas.
1634
01:47:38,694 --> 01:47:39,752
Merry Christmas, sir.
1635
01:47:39,828 --> 01:47:42,228
-Merry Christmas Fairchild.
-Merry Christmas, madam.
1636
01:47:42,297 --> 01:47:44,128
She's beautiful.
1637
01:47:44,199 --> 01:47:48,135
-Sir, would you care to smell my rose?
-Of course. lt's lovely.
1638
01:47:50,472 --> 01:47:52,030
Fairchild!
1639
01:47:54,009 --> 01:47:57,240
Fairchild, you did well. She likes it.
1640
01:47:58,513 --> 01:48:01,710
That's ridiculous.
Fairchild, get upstairs and pack your bags.
1641
01:48:01,783 --> 01:48:03,614
-Sir?
-God.
1642
01:48:07,956 --> 01:48:11,585
Come on, Fairchild. l mean it.
Upstairs. Pack your things.
1643
01:48:11,993 --> 01:48:13,255
Yes, sir.
1644
01:48:14,329 --> 01:48:18,857
-Arthur, honey, don't you think--
-Linda, this is between me and Fairchild.
1645
01:48:19,101 --> 01:48:21,535
-Yes, but Arthur--
-l'll handle it.
1646
01:48:21,603 --> 01:48:22,968
All right.
1647
01:48:33,582 --> 01:48:36,574
-ls that everything?
-What? Yes, sir.
1648
01:48:36,651 --> 01:48:38,312
Fine. Follow me.
1649
01:48:51,032 --> 01:48:53,057
Sir, that's Hobson's room.
1650
01:48:54,770 --> 01:48:56,931
lf Hobson should drop in...
1651
01:48:57,973 --> 01:48:59,668
you get the couch.
1652
01:49:00,776 --> 01:49:02,141
Excellent!
1653
01:49:08,683 --> 01:49:09,877
What did he say?
1654
01:49:09,951 --> 01:49:12,215
You should have seen his face.
1655
01:49:13,488 --> 01:49:16,321
-Here we are.
-Hello, my darling.
1656
01:49:18,660 --> 01:49:20,787
Why am l talking like this?
1657
01:49:21,396 --> 01:49:24,297
Come on, angel. Come on, princess.
1658
01:49:26,034 --> 01:49:28,002
There you go.
1659
01:52:44,165 --> 01:52:45,154
English
121124