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1
00:00:03,440 --> 00:00:04,680
- You're wrong.
- No, I'm not.
2
00:00:04,840 --> 00:00:07,081
- Yes, you are.
- No, I'm not.
3
00:00:07,240 --> 00:00:11,723
Settle this. Those little animated pictures
on the Internet. Are they called gifs or "jifs"?
4
00:00:11,880 --> 00:00:15,248
Well, the G stands for "graphic,"
so that's a hard G, so I'd say gif.
5
00:00:15,400 --> 00:00:21,646
- The guy who invented it says it's "jif."
- I'm sorry, do you mean the guy or the "juy"?
6
00:00:22,920 --> 00:00:27,005
Well, I'll give you three guesses
why I'm so irritated.
7
00:00:27,160 --> 00:00:30,482
Something happened different
from the way you wanted it.
8
00:00:31,880 --> 00:00:33,450
I guess news travels fast.
9
00:00:34,880 --> 00:00:38,407
It's true. A select group of scientists
was invited to a weekend symposium...
10
00:00:38,600 --> 00:00:41,570
...at a former home of Richard Feynman,
and I wasn't included.
11
00:00:41,720 --> 00:00:46,169
Oh. Sheldon, I'm sure it's not because
they don't think you're an elite scientist.
12
00:00:46,320 --> 00:00:49,688
Yeah, I bet you anything
it's just because you're a pain in the ass.
13
00:00:50,680 --> 00:00:52,842
You're just saying that
to make me feel better.
14
00:00:54,280 --> 00:00:56,442
You can spend the rest of the day
being bitter...
15
00:00:56,600 --> 00:00:58,250
Agreed.
16
00:00:59,160 --> 00:01:01,845
I was gonna say "or," but why bother?
17
00:01:28,600 --> 00:01:32,082
- Hey, Raj.
- Hey. I got you a little gift.
18
00:01:32,240 --> 00:01:34,527
Wow, that's a lot of Girl Scout cookies.
19
00:01:34,680 --> 00:01:38,401
You know me. I'm from India.
I can't resist children begging.
20
00:01:39,840 --> 00:01:42,764
- How's it going with the title to the house?
- Great. It's done.
21
00:01:42,920 --> 00:01:45,605
The lawyer tracked down my father,
got him to sign it over.
22
00:01:45,760 --> 00:01:49,401
I didn't have to meet him, didn't have
to talk to him. I don't even know where he is.
23
00:01:49,560 --> 00:01:53,007
- Wow. So you're not curious at all?
- Nope.
24
00:01:53,160 --> 00:01:54,605
Huh. What if he's in prison?
25
00:01:55,440 --> 00:01:59,081
What if he's a spy?
What if he's in a Beatles cover band?
26
00:02:00,440 --> 00:02:02,886
I'm just saying,
if he's got your nose and haircut...
27
00:02:03,040 --> 00:02:04,610
...he'd make a killer Ringo.
28
00:02:07,480 --> 00:02:11,246
- Thanks for agreeing to do this.
- It's cool. I've never been on a podcast before.
29
00:02:11,440 --> 00:02:14,569
Well, you picked a good one to start.
Wil's had lots of great guests.
30
00:02:14,720 --> 00:02:18,691
Jonathan Frakes, Brent Spiner, Michael Dorn,
Gates McFadden.
31
00:02:18,840 --> 00:02:21,764
- Those are Star Trek people.
- Yes.
32
00:02:21,920 --> 00:02:25,288
I only figured that out
because I'd never heard of any of them. Heh.
33
00:02:26,080 --> 00:02:30,051
I deserved that.
I invited you on my show and I drove here.
34
00:02:30,200 --> 00:02:31,281
Sorry.
35
00:02:31,440 --> 00:02:34,046
Okay, so this is basically
just like a little talk show.
36
00:02:34,200 --> 00:02:38,410
We're gonna take some calls, talk about
what it was like on the set of Serial Ape-ist 2.
37
00:02:38,560 --> 00:02:40,562
- It should be really fun.
- This is exciting.
38
00:02:40,760 --> 00:02:42,330
Yeah. So how many people listen?
39
00:02:42,480 --> 00:02:45,689
Most people download it later,
but usually a few thousand listen live.
40
00:02:45,840 --> 00:02:50,050
What? A few thousand people listen
to you talk about nerd stuff?
41
00:02:51,960 --> 00:02:55,521
Again, right in the ears,
straight to the feelings.
42
00:02:58,760 --> 00:03:01,001
Can you please pass the salt?
43
00:03:01,560 --> 00:03:04,882
Sure. Not like I was invited
to Richard Feynman's house...
44
00:03:05,040 --> 00:03:07,407
...and have anything better to do.
45
00:03:08,280 --> 00:03:12,444
- Is this how the rest of the night's gonna be?
- I don't know the future.
46
00:03:14,520 --> 00:03:17,729
Do you think there's a chance
that an asteroid could hit the Earth...
47
00:03:17,920 --> 00:03:21,322
...destroying Feynman's house
and everyone in it?
48
00:03:22,400 --> 00:03:23,481
No, Sheldon.
49
00:03:23,680 --> 00:03:26,889
Well, then, buckle up.
You're in for a cranky night.
50
00:03:27,280 --> 00:03:29,931
According to the codicil
of the relationship agreement...
51
00:03:30,080 --> 00:03:33,846
...which you insisted upon, we're not allowed
to pout or be moody on date night.
52
00:03:34,000 --> 00:03:38,608
You know I just put that in
because of uterus stuff.
53
00:03:39,920 --> 00:03:41,490
Well, it applies to you too.
54
00:03:42,400 --> 00:03:45,529
I was afraid you might bring this up...
55
00:03:45,680 --> 00:03:48,570
...so I have a work-around.
56
00:03:52,520 --> 00:03:54,284
There you go.
57
00:03:59,080 --> 00:04:02,368
As far as you're concerned, I'm smiling.
58
00:04:03,560 --> 00:04:05,961
Though I admit I'm smiling a little
at the moment...
59
00:04:06,120 --> 00:04:08,282
...because this loophole is so brilliant.
60
00:04:10,440 --> 00:04:14,764
So, Bernadette, have you thought about
how you're going to redecorate this place?
61
00:04:14,920 --> 00:04:17,764
You know, I'm thinking,
ripping up the carpets...
62
00:04:17,920 --> 00:04:20,526
...maybe lose the wallpaper,
all new light fixtures.
63
00:04:20,680 --> 00:04:24,241
You know, if you knocked out this wall,
it would give you an open floor plan.
64
00:04:24,400 --> 00:04:28,371
And then...
It's a little scary but could be fun.
65
00:04:28,520 --> 00:04:31,126
...indoor fire pit.
66
00:04:31,800 --> 00:04:32,926
[DOORBELL RINGS]
67
00:04:33,480 --> 00:04:37,929
Hey, I grew up in this house, okay?
No one's knocking anything down.
68
00:04:38,080 --> 00:04:39,491
Okay, okay.
69
00:04:39,640 --> 00:04:43,122
When he's at Comic-Con,
I'm bringing in a wrecking ball.
70
00:04:46,440 --> 00:04:49,444
- Can I help you?
- Hi, are you Howard Wolowitz?
71
00:04:49,640 --> 00:04:51,005
Yes.
72
00:04:51,160 --> 00:04:54,642
Um, this is a little weird.
A lawyer was trying to contact my father...
73
00:04:54,800 --> 00:04:57,451
...because his name was still on the title
for this house.
74
00:04:58,120 --> 00:04:59,884
Well... Who's your father?
75
00:05:00,040 --> 00:05:01,769
Sam Wolowitz.
76
00:05:02,320 --> 00:05:03,526
Oh.
77
00:05:03,680 --> 00:05:06,684
- Sam Wolowitz is my father.
- I know.
78
00:05:08,320 --> 00:05:11,608
Well, wait. So if we have the same father...
79
00:05:12,800 --> 00:05:14,882
I mean, are you saying
you're my half-brother?
80
00:05:15,480 --> 00:05:16,720
I think so.
81
00:05:18,200 --> 00:05:20,885
Bernadette,
weird things are happening out here.
82
00:05:24,240 --> 00:05:27,164
I think I started to suspect
it was a bad movie...
83
00:05:27,320 --> 00:05:31,006
...when I looked at the script
and saw the title...
84
00:05:31,520 --> 00:05:35,889
...Serial Ape-ist 2: Monkey See, Monkey Kill.
85
00:05:36,320 --> 00:05:39,927
Spoiler alert: After the monkey sees, it kills.
86
00:05:40,760 --> 00:05:42,091
Psst.
87
00:05:42,560 --> 00:05:46,167
I've just been handed a note.
I'm going to read it.
88
00:05:46,360 --> 00:05:49,330
"Wil, do you want more Diet Coke?
89
00:05:50,840 --> 00:05:53,366
Also, we have juice."
90
00:05:55,200 --> 00:05:57,362
I didn't wanna interrupt.
91
00:05:58,680 --> 00:06:02,287
That voice you just heard belongs to Leonard,
Penny's fiancé.
92
00:06:02,440 --> 00:06:04,920
- Why don't you grab headphones and join us?
- Really?
93
00:06:05,080 --> 00:06:06,491
WIL: Yeah.
- That'd be great.
94
00:06:06,640 --> 00:06:10,247
All right, so while Leonard gets set up,
let's take a call.
95
00:06:10,400 --> 00:06:14,246
Hello, caller. You are on with Penny and Wil
from Serial Ape-ist 2.
96
00:06:14,400 --> 00:06:18,041
WOMAN [OVER PHONE]: I don't have a question.I just wanna say I'm a big fan of the movie.
97
00:06:18,200 --> 00:06:19,247
I've seen it like 10 times.
98
00:06:19,440 --> 00:06:23,923
Okay, well, I'll apologize for the first time,
but the other nine are on you.
99
00:06:25,720 --> 00:06:29,441
Thanks, caller. You know the movie
actually has a little bit of a cult following?
100
00:06:29,600 --> 00:06:32,251
- Really?
- Yeah. I was at a science-fiction convention...
101
00:06:32,400 --> 00:06:35,244
...and I saw a woman dressed
as your half-ape character.
102
00:06:35,400 --> 00:06:38,563
Oh, if she was with an Indian guy
dressed like a banana...
103
00:06:38,720 --> 00:06:41,405
...that was just my friends Howard and Raj.
104
00:06:43,240 --> 00:06:45,208
It's time for a very special guest caller.
105
00:06:45,360 --> 00:06:49,126
A friend of mine you probably know
as the director of such movies as Clerks...
106
00:06:49,280 --> 00:06:53,763
...or from podcasts and books where he often
reminds you he's the guy who directed Clerks.
107
00:06:53,920 --> 00:06:55,126
Hello, Kevin Smith.
108
00:06:55,280 --> 00:06:57,851
KEVIN SMITH [OVER PHONE]:
Hey, man, yo. Is everything okay, Wil?
109
00:06:58,000 --> 00:07:02,927
Because it's been like two minutesand you haven't even brought up Stand by Me.
110
00:07:03,800 --> 00:07:07,771
- Hey, Kevin, it's really exciting to talk to you.
- Yeah, it really is.
111
00:07:07,920 --> 00:07:10,969
Oh, you guys are very sweet.
So, Penny, listen. I saw your movie.
112
00:07:11,120 --> 00:07:13,168
Oh, wow, I wish it was better.
113
00:07:13,320 --> 00:07:16,210
Oh, don't worry about it.
Have you seen some of Kevin's films?
114
00:07:17,280 --> 00:07:19,806
You're cruising for a beating, Wheaton.
115
00:07:21,760 --> 00:07:25,446
Anyway, man, I dug the ape movie, Penny.
And I thought you were, like, really great in it.
116
00:07:25,600 --> 00:07:27,409
- Aw.
- You know, I'm in the movie too.
117
00:07:27,560 --> 00:07:29,210
Yeah, whatever. Penny...
118
00:07:30,520 --> 00:07:33,967
Penny, how come you're not in more stuff?
I'd cast you in a minute.
119
00:07:34,120 --> 00:07:35,645
- Seriously?
- Oh, yeah, man.
120
00:07:35,800 --> 00:07:38,246
I'm actually in preproduction
on a movie right now...
121
00:07:38,400 --> 00:07:42,485
...way different than anythingI've ever done before. It's called Clerks 3.
122
00:07:44,120 --> 00:07:47,966
- You should come over and read for a part.
- Oh, my... I would love that.
123
00:07:48,120 --> 00:07:50,964
- You have a new job.
- Well, maybe I could do both.
124
00:07:51,400 --> 00:07:53,448
I don't think you can do both.
125
00:07:53,600 --> 00:07:55,807
I don't think I asked you.
126
00:07:56,320 --> 00:07:57,481
Yeah, you tell him, Penny.
127
00:07:59,320 --> 00:08:01,846
Stay out of it, Kevin Smith.
128
00:08:03,760 --> 00:08:08,687
Do you think there comes a point in life when
it stops feeling bad to be left out of things?
129
00:08:09,160 --> 00:08:10,605
Probably not.
130
00:08:10,800 --> 00:08:14,361
It's an evolutionary advantage
to be included in group activities.
131
00:08:15,160 --> 00:08:17,891
You know what?
I used to be a fan of evolution...
132
00:08:18,040 --> 00:08:22,090
...but I've since evolved,
and now I think it's dumb.
133
00:08:23,320 --> 00:08:27,166
Being left out is a terrible feeling.
No one understands that better than I do.
134
00:08:27,840 --> 00:08:29,444
Hey, look at that.
135
00:08:29,600 --> 00:08:31,921
Even in your example,
you're all by yourself.
136
00:08:34,240 --> 00:08:38,006
When there was a lice epidemic at my school,
everybody got it except me.
137
00:08:38,200 --> 00:08:43,206
I tried to fool everyone by sprinkling sugar
in my hair, but I just got attacked by bees.
138
00:08:45,120 --> 00:08:48,442
I can just picture them all right now
at Feynman's house.
139
00:08:48,880 --> 00:08:50,882
Probably discussing Schrödinger...
140
00:08:51,040 --> 00:08:54,010
...and at the same time,
not discussing Schrödinger.
141
00:08:54,880 --> 00:08:59,522
See? They're missing out
on hilarious jokes like that.
142
00:08:59,720 --> 00:09:02,246
And at the same time, not.
143
00:09:03,600 --> 00:09:07,605
Reminds me of when my stupid brother and
sister would build forts in the living room...
144
00:09:07,760 --> 00:09:11,401
...and wouldn't let me in.
I hated that so much.
145
00:09:11,720 --> 00:09:16,806
You know, there's nothing I can do
about getting you invited to the symposium.
146
00:09:16,960 --> 00:09:19,122
But if you wanted...
147
00:09:19,280 --> 00:09:20,566
...we could build a fort.
148
00:09:21,880 --> 00:09:23,609
Isn't that a little juvenile?
149
00:09:24,240 --> 00:09:26,607
More juvenile than this?
150
00:09:29,920 --> 00:09:33,367
I'll get the blankets,
you Google how to have childlike fun.
151
00:09:35,840 --> 00:09:38,730
You know, I'm being a bad host.
Let me get some more coffee.
152
00:09:38,880 --> 00:09:40,882
- Oh, let me do it, Howard.
- No, I got it.
153
00:09:43,560 --> 00:09:45,005
So, Josh, what do you do?
154
00:09:45,160 --> 00:09:47,288
I'm studying oceanography
down in San Diego.
155
00:09:47,480 --> 00:09:49,562
Oh, how nice.
156
00:09:53,760 --> 00:09:55,762
I love Finding Nemo.
157
00:09:56,960 --> 00:10:00,601
Enough chitchat. How do we know
you are who you say you are?
158
00:10:01,120 --> 00:10:04,124
- Why would I lie?
- Okay, you got me there.
159
00:10:06,200 --> 00:10:08,009
- You here looking for money?
- No.
160
00:10:08,160 --> 00:10:10,401
Kidney? Cornea? Piece of his liver?
161
00:10:10,560 --> 00:10:11,721
No.
162
00:10:12,440 --> 00:10:14,010
You're in a Beatles cover band...
163
00:10:14,160 --> 00:10:16,766
...and you need Howard
to replace your dad as Ringo.
164
00:10:19,040 --> 00:10:23,443
- Why don't you help with the coffee?
- Okay, but something smells fishy.
165
00:10:23,640 --> 00:10:26,723
And not just because
you work around sea animals.
166
00:10:26,880 --> 00:10:30,123
That actually sounds interesting,
and I'd like to learn more about it.
167
00:10:32,960 --> 00:10:35,327
- Hey, you okay?
- Not really.
168
00:10:35,480 --> 00:10:39,485
This guy shows up out of the blue,
and now I have a brother?
169
00:10:39,640 --> 00:10:42,689
My father has another family?
170
00:10:43,520 --> 00:10:46,330
I get it. What do you wanna do?
171
00:10:46,480 --> 00:10:50,007
I don't know, I...
I'd just like him to go away.
172
00:10:50,160 --> 00:10:51,764
I can't deal with this.
173
00:10:51,960 --> 00:10:53,803
All right, I got your back.
174
00:10:54,720 --> 00:10:56,961
Thank you. Come on.
175
00:10:58,800 --> 00:11:01,724
I'd like to point out,
this wall just provided a lot of privacy.
176
00:11:03,920 --> 00:11:07,322
I can't believe my brother's an astronaut.
That's amazing. What was it like?
177
00:11:07,520 --> 00:11:11,730
- Listen, dude, it's time for you to hit the...
- Hey. The young man asked a good question.
178
00:11:17,560 --> 00:11:19,324
So for those of you just tuning in...
179
00:11:19,480 --> 00:11:22,529
...we are listening to a really fun fight
between my co-star...
180
00:11:22,680 --> 00:11:25,286
We're not fighting.
We're just having a conversation.
181
00:11:26,400 --> 00:11:29,927
All right. We're listening
to a really fun conversation...
182
00:11:30,120 --> 00:11:33,966
...between my co-star from Serial Ape-ist 2
and her fiancé...
183
00:11:34,120 --> 00:11:37,010
...who doesn't believe
women should have dreams.
184
00:11:39,680 --> 00:11:41,887
Give me back that juice.
185
00:11:43,720 --> 00:11:46,451
- What is the harm if I audition?
- Well, what if you get it?
186
00:11:46,640 --> 00:11:50,167
I don't know, I make a movie,
we could become rich and famous...
187
00:11:50,320 --> 00:11:53,449
...win an Oscar, Golden Globe,
and live an incredibly wonderful life.
188
00:11:53,880 --> 00:11:55,962
From a Kevin Smith movie?
189
00:11:57,360 --> 00:11:59,328
KEVIN SMITH [OVER PHONE]:
Oh, I'm hanging up now.
190
00:11:59,800 --> 00:12:03,850
Don't listen to him. You're awesome.
You're one of the greatest directors of our time.
191
00:12:04,000 --> 00:12:06,048
I don't have a part for you, Wheaton.
192
00:12:07,720 --> 00:12:09,609
And that was Kevin Smith.
193
00:12:10,720 --> 00:12:13,610
- Thanks a lot.
- I'm just trying to protect you.
194
00:12:13,760 --> 00:12:17,685
How many times did I see you get your heart
broken trying to make it as an actress?
195
00:12:17,880 --> 00:12:21,089
Instead of protecting me, try being excited
when something good happens.
196
00:12:21,240 --> 00:12:23,083
I'm always excited for you.
197
00:12:23,240 --> 00:12:26,642
I'm excited that you found this new job
where you're making decent money.
198
00:12:26,800 --> 00:12:30,486
- Decent? I make twice what you make.
- Wait, twice?
199
00:12:30,680 --> 00:12:32,125
Yeah.
200
00:12:32,840 --> 00:12:35,684
Like, times two? Twice?
201
00:12:37,120 --> 00:12:42,206
For those at home, Leonard just found out his
fiancée makes way more money than he does.
202
00:12:42,400 --> 00:12:44,641
Let's listen.
203
00:12:44,800 --> 00:12:47,451
I went to school for half my life.
I have a doctorate.
204
00:12:47,600 --> 00:12:50,331
I'm still paying off college loans.
205
00:12:50,480 --> 00:12:53,370
Well, how much do you owe?
Maybe I can help you out.
206
00:12:55,280 --> 00:12:58,523
Wil, I'm... Can we just turn off the podcast
for a little bit?
207
00:12:58,680 --> 00:13:02,127
For those of you at home,
I am shaking my head no.
208
00:13:09,800 --> 00:13:11,086
How's it going, Sheldon?
209
00:13:11,240 --> 00:13:13,288
Wonderful.
210
00:13:14,840 --> 00:13:16,808
I just finished hanging the lights.
211
00:13:16,960 --> 00:13:19,884
- Can I come in?
- Yes. Oh, but enter through the side.
212
00:13:20,040 --> 00:13:22,771
Batman is a load-bearing blanket.
213
00:13:27,960 --> 00:13:30,645
- Amazing.
- I know.
214
00:13:30,800 --> 00:13:33,849
This isn't the printout. This is my real face.
215
00:13:35,800 --> 00:13:40,362
What are we doing? This is a fort.
Let's sit on the floor.
216
00:13:40,520 --> 00:13:43,000
Roughing it? Okay.
217
00:13:46,640 --> 00:13:50,247
Everything looks so big from down here.
218
00:13:51,320 --> 00:13:53,846
This must be how Leonard feels.
219
00:13:57,520 --> 00:14:02,560
I'm surprised you could hear me
with this Thin Mint in your ear! Ha, ha!
220
00:14:02,720 --> 00:14:05,087
- Yeah, pretty cool, huh?
- Yeah.
221
00:14:06,240 --> 00:14:08,891
Anyway, I should probably get going.
222
00:14:09,360 --> 00:14:12,921
Howie, have you noticed how often
people say that when you start to do magic?
223
00:14:14,560 --> 00:14:16,369
Sorry. I have a long drive.
224
00:14:16,520 --> 00:14:19,205
Well, I hope I get to see you again.
225
00:14:19,960 --> 00:14:24,409
I hope so too. I've always dreamed
of having a brother to play catch with.
226
00:14:24,920 --> 00:14:27,082
Aw. Keep dreaming.
227
00:14:28,080 --> 00:14:30,321
Hey, I threw the first pitch
at an Angels game.
228
00:14:30,480 --> 00:14:33,723
- Wow.
- He did it with a robot.
229
00:14:34,800 --> 00:14:37,531
You had sex with a robot?
230
00:14:38,360 --> 00:14:41,204
- That's not what she meant.
- But technically, yes.
231
00:14:44,200 --> 00:14:47,170
Hang on. If you're making all this money,
where is it?
232
00:14:47,360 --> 00:14:49,886
- In a safe place.
- What does that mean? Under your bed?
233
00:14:50,040 --> 00:14:53,567
No. It means a diversified portfolio
of stocks and bonds.
234
00:14:53,720 --> 00:14:58,647
I'm not overly conservative. I'm young.
So my guy said I can afford to take some risks.
235
00:14:58,800 --> 00:15:02,521
- Wait a minute. You have a guy?
- Don't you have a guy?
236
00:15:02,680 --> 00:15:05,650
Why would I have a guy?
I don't have any money.
237
00:15:06,920 --> 00:15:10,242
Oh, sweetie,
you should really get some money.
238
00:15:10,800 --> 00:15:15,488
For those of you listening at home,
how great is this?
239
00:15:15,680 --> 00:15:18,251
Wil, I'm begging you,
just please turn that off.
240
00:15:18,400 --> 00:15:20,084
Sure.
241
00:15:21,240 --> 00:15:23,004
And we're back.
242
00:15:24,120 --> 00:15:26,327
Why are you making
such a big deal out of this?
243
00:15:26,480 --> 00:15:28,960
So our roles changed a bit
over the last couple years.
244
00:15:29,120 --> 00:15:32,602
This is the way life is.
And I'm sure in time they'll change again.
245
00:15:33,360 --> 00:15:35,931
Great. You're not only
more successful than me...
246
00:15:36,120 --> 00:15:37,963
...now you're more mature.
247
00:15:38,440 --> 00:15:42,126
Okay, look. Would it make you feel better
if I did something dumb...
248
00:15:42,280 --> 00:15:46,080
...like sneak out of work one day
to go audition for a Kevin Smith movie?
249
00:15:46,240 --> 00:15:48,288
That would be great. Thank you.
250
00:15:49,880 --> 00:15:53,726
I'm just gonna jump in here real quick.
Leonard, a moment ago you were dead set...
251
00:15:53,880 --> 00:15:57,168
...against Penny resuming her acting career,
but now you're all for it.
252
00:15:57,320 --> 00:16:00,403
Is it fair to say
that she played you like a violin?
253
00:16:02,000 --> 00:16:03,923
Yes, it is, Wil.
254
00:16:07,000 --> 00:16:09,321
So I have to ask.
255
00:16:09,480 --> 00:16:11,244
Was the robot sexy?
256
00:16:12,120 --> 00:16:15,966
It was actually just a mechanical hand.
257
00:16:16,680 --> 00:16:19,160
Because that's all you need, right?
258
00:16:20,480 --> 00:16:22,562
You are my brother.
259
00:16:24,080 --> 00:16:30,964
Okay, so the final four forts in the first annual
Best Fort Ever Contest or fort-off...
260
00:16:32,400 --> 00:16:37,531
...are Fort Knox, Fort Ticonderoga,
Fort Sumter...
261
00:16:37,720 --> 00:16:39,643
...and Fort Cozy McBlanket.
262
00:16:41,320 --> 00:16:45,564
I'd say Knox over Ticonderoga,
because it's got the gold...
263
00:16:45,720 --> 00:16:47,722
- Mm-hm.
- ...and McBlanket over Sumter...
264
00:16:47,880 --> 00:16:50,042
...because it has a higher thread count.
265
00:16:51,360 --> 00:16:52,407
[CELL PHONE RINGING]
266
00:16:52,560 --> 00:16:53,607
Oh.
267
00:16:53,760 --> 00:16:55,683
Ten o'clock.
268
00:16:55,840 --> 00:16:59,561
- Date night's over.
- No. We haven't picked a winner.
269
00:17:00,000 --> 00:17:01,968
We both know this one's gonna win.
270
00:17:02,160 --> 00:17:03,685
Well, of course we do.
271
00:17:03,840 --> 00:17:07,526
Fort Knox doesn't have
a secret physics lending library.
272
00:17:09,520 --> 00:17:14,082
- Come on. I'll help you take this down.
- Wait. What if, just this once...
273
00:17:14,240 --> 00:17:18,928
...we suspend the date-night parameters
and you stay later?
274
00:17:20,840 --> 00:17:24,208
Well, as long as we're suspending
the parameters...
275
00:17:25,200 --> 00:17:29,330
...I could stay really late,
and we could have our first sleepover.
276
00:17:30,880 --> 00:17:35,249
- That's a big step.
- It's a big fort.
277
00:17:37,840 --> 00:17:38,887
Very well.
278
00:17:39,040 --> 00:17:45,286
I will agree to a family-friendly,
G-rated boy-girl sleepover.
279
00:17:47,000 --> 00:17:51,005
PG. Some scenes may be too intense
for younger viewers.
280
00:17:52,160 --> 00:17:57,291
G-rated with a warning
for families with babies and toddlers.
281
00:17:59,000 --> 00:18:00,331
You got yourself a sleepover.
282
00:18:02,080 --> 00:18:04,367
Do you need to borrow a toothbrush
or pajamas?
283
00:18:04,920 --> 00:18:08,970
Would it alarm you to know
that I hid those things here two years ago...
284
00:18:09,120 --> 00:18:11,600
...just in case this ever came up?
285
00:18:14,320 --> 00:18:17,563
It would, but you know how much
I admire preparedness.
286
00:18:19,080 --> 00:18:21,208
How did you know
we'd be in the living room?
287
00:18:21,360 --> 00:18:23,806
Who says this is the only one I hid?
288
00:18:34,520 --> 00:18:36,488
Hello? What is this?
289
00:18:36,640 --> 00:18:38,881
We built a fort.
290
00:18:40,200 --> 00:18:41,361
Are those my sheets?
291
00:18:41,520 --> 00:18:43,682
Yes, they are.
292
00:18:44,160 --> 00:18:48,165
Okay, well, you kids have fun.
I'm gonna go to sleep.
293
00:18:48,320 --> 00:18:50,721
Leonard, don't you wanna see
the inside of the fort?
294
00:18:50,880 --> 00:18:52,848
- No, I'm good.
- Oh, come on.
295
00:18:53,000 --> 00:18:55,606
I really wanna tell someone
they can't come in.
296
00:18:56,560 --> 00:19:00,451
Okay, fine.
Sheldon, may I please visit your fort?
297
00:19:01,160 --> 00:19:03,606
I wanna say no, but it's too glorious.
Get in here.
298
00:19:06,320 --> 00:19:09,608
LEONARD: Thank you.
AMY: Have a seat on the floor.
299
00:19:09,760 --> 00:19:12,240
SHELDON:
Not there. That's my spot.
300
00:19:40,000 --> 00:19:42,002
[English - US - SDH]
26308
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