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1
00:00:04,371 --> 00:00:07,534
Boy, seems like forever since
the four of us have been out to eat.
2
00:00:07,708 --> 00:00:09,676
You know, just the guys.
3
00:00:09,843 --> 00:00:13,836
Oh, God. Yes, we get it.
You have a girlfriend now.
4
00:00:14,047 --> 00:00:17,676
- A little jealous, are we?
- No, I'm not jealous.
5
00:00:20,153 --> 00:00:23,714
All right, I'd kill a hobo if it would
get me laid. Now, can we order?
6
00:00:23,924 --> 00:00:27,325
Oh, dear Lord, they redid the menu.
7
00:00:27,494 --> 00:00:29,223
So what? It's the same food.
8
00:00:29,396 --> 00:00:31,023
Oh, is it? Look at this.
9
00:00:31,198 --> 00:00:34,190
General Tso's Chicken
is no longer listed under "specialties."
10
00:00:34,368 --> 00:00:36,199
It's now under "chicken."
11
00:00:36,570 --> 00:00:40,165
- So?
- Yes, General Tso.
12
00:00:41,241 --> 00:00:44,074
Not "Tso" the chicken,
"so" the question.
13
00:00:45,245 --> 00:00:49,875
- So?
- So why is it no longer a specialty?
14
00:00:50,050 --> 00:00:53,577
Did the chef lose confidence
in the dish or himself?
15
00:00:53,754 --> 00:00:58,088
And look over here.
"Shrimp in mobster sauce."
16
00:00:58,792 --> 00:01:01,283
What is mobster sauce?
17
00:01:01,528 --> 00:01:04,190
- It's obviously a typo.
- Perhaps.
18
00:01:04,364 --> 00:01:08,198
Or perhaps this restaurant's now
a front for organized crime.
19
00:01:08,402 --> 00:01:10,199
For all we know, the mobster sauce...
20
00:01:10,370 --> 00:01:12,895
...contains actual chunks
of deceased mobsters.
21
00:01:13,106 --> 00:01:17,133
No, no, no. I think it just means
it's the kind of sauce that mobsters like.
22
00:01:17,311 --> 00:01:20,144
It doesn't mean any of that.
It's a typo.
23
00:01:20,380 --> 00:01:24,714
- You know what? Let's just get a pizza.
- Good idea. We'll go to Corleone's.
24
00:01:24,885 --> 00:01:27,479
Sure, no mobsters there.
25
00:01:29,289 --> 00:01:31,257
You know, the more I think about it...
26
00:01:31,425 --> 00:01:35,885
...the mobster sauce couldn't
possibly contain chunks of mobster.
27
00:01:37,130 --> 00:01:41,294
- And why is that?
- It was listed under "seafood."
28
00:01:42,269 --> 00:01:45,898
What if they were mobsters
who slept with the fishes?
29
00:01:49,910 --> 00:01:53,505
Leonard, are we having
a serious conversation or not?
30
00:01:54,681 --> 00:01:55,943
What the...?
31
00:02:02,122 --> 00:02:05,091
- The TV is gone.
- So are our laptops.
32
00:02:05,258 --> 00:02:08,785
Oh, God. Oh, God.
33
00:02:08,962 --> 00:02:11,522
Oh, God!
34
00:02:13,700 --> 00:02:16,032
It's all right.
35
00:02:16,203 --> 00:02:18,831
They didn't take my comic books.
36
00:02:44,164 --> 00:02:47,292
They took our TV, two laptops,
four external hard drives...
37
00:02:47,467 --> 00:02:51,699
...our PS2, our PS3, our Xbox,
our Xbox 360, our classic Nintendo...
38
00:02:51,872 --> 00:02:56,172
...our Super Nintendo,
our Nintendo 64, and our Wii.
39
00:02:56,343 --> 00:02:58,208
We like games.
40
00:02:58,378 --> 00:03:02,576
Right, games. They took "Halo 1," "Halo 2,"
"Halo 3," "Call of Duty 1," "Call of Duty 2"...
41
00:03:02,749 --> 00:03:04,740
..."Call of Duty 3," "Rock Band"...
42
00:03:04,918 --> 00:03:08,479
..."Final Fantasy I" through "IX,"
"The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time"...
43
00:03:08,655 --> 00:03:12,250
..."The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess,"
"Super Mario Bros."
44
00:03:12,426 --> 00:03:15,259
..."Mario & Sonic
at the Winter Olympics"...
45
00:03:17,264 --> 00:03:19,198
...and "Ms. Pac-Man."
46
00:03:21,401 --> 00:03:23,869
Assorted video games.
47
00:03:24,438 --> 00:03:26,668
When does the CSI team get here?
48
00:03:28,008 --> 00:03:30,738
- What?
- In anticipation of their arrival...
49
00:03:30,911 --> 00:03:32,708
...I've bagged some evidence.
50
00:03:32,879 --> 00:03:35,712
One of the thieves had the audacity
to quench his thirst...
51
00:03:35,882 --> 00:03:39,374
...while ransacking our home.
You should be able to pull prints off this.
52
00:03:39,553 --> 00:03:43,614
Here are my prints
so you can rule me out as a suspect.
53
00:03:43,790 --> 00:03:45,553
- What about me?
- I'm sorry, Leonard...
54
00:03:45,726 --> 00:03:50,026
...it's too early to discount the possibility
of this being an inside job.
55
00:03:50,197 --> 00:03:53,894
Would I be completely out of line
to ask you to shoot him?
56
00:03:54,101 --> 00:03:57,264
I'd be happy to put him under
a 72-hour psychiatric hold.
57
00:03:58,739 --> 00:04:02,038
I'm not crazy.
My mother had me tested.
58
00:04:02,242 --> 00:04:05,609
We're done. Call this number,
and we'll fax you a copy of the report.
59
00:04:05,779 --> 00:04:07,872
You can submit it
to your insurance company.
60
00:04:08,048 --> 00:04:11,313
I'm sorry, that's the end
of your inquiry?
61
00:04:11,485 --> 00:04:14,613
Do you have any more information
that might be relevant?
62
00:04:14,788 --> 00:04:17,382
Goodness. Where do I begin?
For instance, my laptop...
63
00:04:17,557 --> 00:04:20,754
...contained four out of the five
gedanken experiments necessary...
64
00:04:20,927 --> 00:04:23,088
...for a restatement of
the quantum measurement problem.
65
00:04:23,263 --> 00:04:24,662
How's that going to help them?
66
00:04:24,831 --> 00:04:26,992
They could monitor
scientific publications...
67
00:04:27,167 --> 00:04:30,659
...and see if anyone posts such
a restatement in the next couple of months.
68
00:04:30,837 --> 00:04:34,671
If so, the authors are most likely
in possession of my stolen laptop.
69
00:04:35,809 --> 00:04:38,073
Good night, fellas.
70
00:04:38,245 --> 00:04:40,839
Come on, Bochco.
71
00:04:50,457 --> 00:04:53,483
What are we supposed to do now?
72
00:04:53,660 --> 00:04:55,525
The only thing we can do:
73
00:04:55,695 --> 00:04:58,186
Watch TV on our phones
until the criminals return...
74
00:04:58,365 --> 00:05:00,424
...and bludgeon us to death
in our sleep.
75
00:05:01,201 --> 00:05:03,635
Does that mean you've ruled me out
as a suspect?
76
00:05:03,804 --> 00:05:05,362
Oh, how I wish I could.
77
00:05:58,158 --> 00:06:01,389
I do not have to urinate.
78
00:06:04,164 --> 00:06:07,998
I am the master of my own bladder.
79
00:06:10,070 --> 00:06:12,197
Drat.
80
00:06:14,608 --> 00:06:17,543
I can't believe it. If I hadn't
been working the dinner shift...
81
00:06:17,711 --> 00:06:19,679
...I would've run right into
the robbers.
82
00:06:19,880 --> 00:06:22,075
Hey, there's no reason for you
to be scared.
83
00:06:22,249 --> 00:06:26,709
I'm not scared. I would've gone
all Nebraska on their asses.
84
00:06:28,688 --> 00:06:29,780
Leonard and Penny.
Leonard and Penny.
85
00:06:29,956 --> 00:06:33,221
- Leonard and Penny.
- Hand me the bat.
86
00:06:36,429 --> 00:06:38,522
We just had a major crime
in the building...
87
00:06:38,698 --> 00:06:42,190
...and you open the door
without asking who it is?
88
00:06:42,369 --> 00:06:44,303
It won't happen again. What's up?
89
00:06:44,471 --> 00:06:48,100
Nothing. Just wanted to see
if you were both okay.
90
00:06:48,308 --> 00:06:50,742
We're fine, Sheldon.
91
00:06:50,911 --> 00:06:52,742
All right, then.
92
00:06:52,913 --> 00:06:55,746
- Good night.
- Good night.
93
00:06:57,050 --> 00:06:59,541
- Well, that was weird. Even for him.
- Mm.
94
00:07:00,987 --> 00:07:04,787
Leonard and Penny.
Leonard and Penny. Leonard and Penny.
95
00:07:05,659 --> 00:07:08,321
Who is it?
96
00:07:08,495 --> 00:07:11,430
Sheldon. Sheldon Cooper.
97
00:07:11,631 --> 00:07:15,123
- Yes?
- May I come in?
98
00:07:16,503 --> 00:07:18,403
Yeah.
99
00:07:26,313 --> 00:07:28,941
I see you're drinking wine.
100
00:07:29,649 --> 00:07:32,174
Yes, we are. And we're about
to go to bed.
101
00:07:32,819 --> 00:07:34,616
Uh-huh.
102
00:07:35,522 --> 00:07:38,355
Sheldon, do you wanna
sleep here tonight?
103
00:07:38,525 --> 00:07:39,958
As small as Leonard is...
104
00:07:40,126 --> 00:07:43,687
...I don't think the two of you
would be comfortable on the couch.
105
00:07:44,698 --> 00:07:47,189
- So, what do you want?
- It's not what I want.
106
00:07:47,367 --> 00:07:49,961
It's what evolution wants.
Human beings are primates.
107
00:07:50,136 --> 00:07:54,197
Primates have evolved to live in groups
both for protection and support.
108
00:07:54,941 --> 00:07:57,603
But you don't like other people.
109
00:07:57,777 --> 00:07:59,938
I do tonight.
110
00:08:00,880 --> 00:08:03,280
It's scary over there.
111
00:08:03,850 --> 00:08:06,648
It's getting scary here too.
112
00:08:13,226 --> 00:08:14,784
Um...
113
00:08:14,961 --> 00:08:17,293
"Three Little Kittens"?
114
00:08:18,832 --> 00:08:21,460
"Three Little Pigs"?
115
00:08:24,304 --> 00:08:26,329
God, I don't know.
116
00:08:26,506 --> 00:08:27,973
Star Wars?
117
00:08:29,676 --> 00:08:31,837
Did we win? Can we go to bed?
118
00:08:32,045 --> 00:08:34,070
Good Lord, I could not have
made this easier.
119
00:08:34,247 --> 00:08:39,879
A hydrogen atom, H,
plus pigs minus P, "higs."
120
00:08:40,053 --> 00:08:43,853
Bow, General Zod trapped
in the Phantom Zone...
121
00:08:45,091 --> 00:08:46,718
..."bow-zone."
122
00:08:46,893 --> 00:08:50,761
Pear, tickle, "pear-tickle."
123
00:08:53,266 --> 00:08:57,032
"Higgs boson particle."
How could you not get that?
124
00:08:57,203 --> 00:09:00,536
He's right, Penny. It's all there.
125
00:09:01,274 --> 00:09:04,243
Look, Sheldon, sweetie,
I know you're feeling insecure...
126
00:09:04,411 --> 00:09:07,608
- ...but we've really gotta go to sleep.
- All right.
127
00:09:07,781 --> 00:09:10,409
I'll take the first watch
and wake you at 0400.
128
00:09:10,617 --> 00:09:13,450
- Great. Good night.
- Wait, wait. What's 0400?
129
00:09:13,620 --> 00:09:15,850
- Four a.m.
- That's, like, in 45 minutes.
130
00:09:16,022 --> 00:09:18,547
Just keep walking.
131
00:09:36,709 --> 00:09:40,042
- It's quiet out there.
- Maybe a little too quiet.
132
00:09:40,213 --> 00:09:43,307
- Where are you going?
- Just gonna take a look around outside.
133
00:09:43,483 --> 00:09:45,815
Bad idea.
134
00:09:47,787 --> 00:09:49,778
No, Jim, don't open the door.
135
00:09:49,956 --> 00:09:52,424
Listen to her, Jim.
136
00:09:55,328 --> 00:09:57,091
Don't worry. There's no one out there.
137
00:10:08,475 --> 00:10:11,808
Leonard and Penny.
Leonard and Penny. Leonard and Penny.
138
00:10:12,745 --> 00:10:15,270
Who is it?
139
00:10:19,285 --> 00:10:23,187
All right. We've got a titanium deadbolt
and a reinforced jam controlled by...
140
00:10:23,356 --> 00:10:25,950
...a state-of-the-art
electronic access system.
141
00:10:26,126 --> 00:10:28,492
- What if they cut the power?
- There's a 200-watt...
142
00:10:28,661 --> 00:10:31,960
- ...uninterruptible backup power supply.
- If someone steals my keys?
143
00:10:32,132 --> 00:10:34,692
There are independent voice
and fingerprint scanners.
144
00:10:34,868 --> 00:10:37,132
What if somebody kidnaps me,
records my voice...
145
00:10:37,303 --> 00:10:39,362
...and then cuts off my thumb?
146
00:10:40,306 --> 00:10:43,036
I'll send them a basket of muffins.
147
00:10:43,977 --> 00:10:48,641
Now, inside we've got motion detectors,
infrared sensors...
148
00:10:48,815 --> 00:10:51,340
...and cameras connected to a server...
149
00:10:51,518 --> 00:10:54,316
...running state-of-the-art
facial-recognition software.
150
00:10:54,487 --> 00:10:56,182
Where did you get all this stuff?
151
00:10:56,356 --> 00:10:59,018
I got a buddy over at
the Department of Defense.
152
00:10:59,192 --> 00:11:03,686
- He just gave it to you?
- I'm sure he would've if I'd asked.
153
00:11:03,863 --> 00:11:06,991
Ironically, their security isn't
all that good.
154
00:11:08,001 --> 00:11:09,127
Raj, your car is blocking me.
155
00:11:10,703 --> 00:11:12,068
Intruder alert. Intruder alert.
156
00:11:12,238 --> 00:11:13,330
- Intruder alert.
- What the hell?
157
00:11:13,506 --> 00:11:15,838
- Sorry, let me help you.
- Intruder alert.
158
00:11:16,009 --> 00:11:20,503
Wonderful security system if
we're attacked by a school of tuna.
159
00:11:20,680 --> 00:11:23,012
Don't worry,
the net's gonna be electrified.
160
00:11:23,183 --> 00:11:26,516
Picture her on the floor,
spasming uncontrollably.
161
00:11:28,188 --> 00:11:30,349
Better.
162
00:11:31,858 --> 00:11:33,849
Sheldon's journal.
163
00:11:34,027 --> 00:11:38,896
Security system In place.
However, sleep continues to elude me.
164
00:11:39,065 --> 00:11:42,865
I've seen the underbelly of Pasadena...
165
00:11:43,036 --> 00:11:46,369
...this so-called City of Roses...
166
00:11:46,539 --> 00:11:51,033
...and It haunts me. Ah! The Injustice.
167
00:11:51,211 --> 00:11:56,706
I lie here awake, tormented,
while out there, evil lurks...
168
00:11:56,883 --> 00:12:01,547
...probably playing "Donkey Kong"
on my classic Nintendo.
169
00:12:32,585 --> 00:12:34,246
Oh, dear.
170
00:12:36,456 --> 00:12:39,914
I am the master of my own bladder.
171
00:12:55,975 --> 00:12:59,308
Leonard and Penny. Leonard and Penny.
Leonard and Penny.
172
00:12:59,479 --> 00:13:00,639
Oh, my...
173
00:13:00,813 --> 00:13:03,611
God, Sheldon.
174
00:13:06,419 --> 00:13:09,513
What the hell are you doing
out there?
175
00:13:11,491 --> 00:13:13,459
I heard a noise.
176
00:13:15,028 --> 00:13:18,156
It was us.
We knocked over a lamp.
177
00:13:18,331 --> 00:13:21,027
- Why would you knock over a lamp?
- We were gonna...
178
00:13:21,200 --> 00:13:25,296
He doesn't need to know
what we were doing, Leonard.
179
00:13:25,471 --> 00:13:26,961
Oh.
180
00:13:27,974 --> 00:13:31,307
No, she's right. I don't need to know
what you were doing.
181
00:13:31,477 --> 00:13:36,141
- Carry on.
- What are you doing? Use the door.
182
00:13:36,316 --> 00:13:38,477
Good thinking.
183
00:13:38,651 --> 00:13:42,348
Hey, perhaps I'll check the perimeter
and make some warm milk.
184
00:13:42,522 --> 00:13:44,490
Great. You do that.
185
00:13:44,657 --> 00:13:47,649
Would you like me to bring you
some warm milk?
186
00:13:47,827 --> 00:13:49,488
I'm lactose intolerant.
187
00:13:49,662 --> 00:13:54,497
And you don't wish to alarm me with
any more loud noises. Very thoughtful.
188
00:13:54,667 --> 00:13:57,363
- Warm milk, Penny?
- No, thanks.
189
00:13:57,870 --> 00:14:02,204
Fine. Good night to you, sir. Miss.
190
00:14:05,211 --> 00:14:08,703
- Sorry about that.
- What can you do?
191
00:14:10,917 --> 00:14:13,181
Intruder alert. Intruder alert.
Intruder alert.
192
00:14:26,032 --> 00:14:28,364
Looks like Wolowitz
got the net electrified.
193
00:14:29,369 --> 00:14:32,497
- Sheldon, are you okay?
- I'm fine.
194
00:14:33,373 --> 00:14:37,002
Though I'm no longer
the master of my own bladder.
195
00:14:41,080 --> 00:14:44,709
My new computer came with
Windows 7.
196
00:14:45,718 --> 00:14:49,916
Windows 7 is much more user-friendly
than Windows Vista.
197
00:14:50,089 --> 00:14:52,080
I don't like that.
198
00:14:55,595 --> 00:14:59,759
Don't you think looking for a new city
to live in is a bit of an overreaction?
199
00:14:59,932 --> 00:15:01,957
Our apartment was broken into.
200
00:15:02,135 --> 00:15:04,228
Our security system tried to kill me.
201
00:15:04,404 --> 00:15:09,103
And as a result, I'm leaving Pasadena
forever. Tell me how that's overreacting.
202
00:15:09,742 --> 00:15:13,143
Come on, Sheldon. You can't move.
Don't you need to stay in one place...
203
00:15:13,312 --> 00:15:16,770
...so the mother ship can find you
when it returns?
204
00:15:17,316 --> 00:15:19,978
Oh, if that were only true.
205
00:15:20,153 --> 00:15:23,247
Unfortunately, as I'm earthbound
for the foreseeable future...
206
00:15:23,423 --> 00:15:26,085
...I need to find a location
that's more hospitable...
207
00:15:26,259 --> 00:15:30,753
...than the mean streets of Pasadena.
Like Enid, Oklahoma.
208
00:15:31,597 --> 00:15:35,465
Low crime rate,
and high-speed Internet connectivity...
209
00:15:35,635 --> 00:15:38,798
...but no model-train shops.
210
00:15:39,972 --> 00:15:42,805
Sorry, Enid.
211
00:15:45,111 --> 00:15:47,102
Is he quitting his job
at the university?
212
00:15:47,280 --> 00:15:49,111
Oh, no. He's gonna telecommute.
213
00:15:49,282 --> 00:15:51,842
Everybody's really excited about it.
214
00:15:52,485 --> 00:15:56,012
All right. Boone, North Carolina.
215
00:15:56,189 --> 00:15:59,488
"Every summer since 1952,
Boone has hosted...
216
00:15:59,659 --> 00:16:02,651
...an outdoor amphitheater portrayal
of the life and times...
217
00:16:02,829 --> 00:16:06,697
...of its namesake: Danel Boone."
218
00:16:06,866 --> 00:16:10,495
That sounds like something
that would attract the wrong crowd.
219
00:16:12,705 --> 00:16:16,300
- Penny, you're from Nebraska, correct?
- Born and raised.
220
00:16:21,814 --> 00:16:26,308
It will take me a few days to get settled.
After I do, I will e-mail you...
221
00:16:26,486 --> 00:16:29,148
...detailed PDFs containing diagrams
and instructions...
222
00:16:29,322 --> 00:16:32,485
...that will guide you through packing
and shipping my possessions...
223
00:16:32,658 --> 00:16:35,149
...to Bozeman, Montana.
224
00:16:35,361 --> 00:16:37,989
In the meantime,
please forward my mail.
225
00:16:38,164 --> 00:16:42,157
Anyplace specific, or just
the Bozeman, Montana loony bin?
226
00:16:43,503 --> 00:16:46,563
I sense you're making a joke,
but Bozeman does have...
227
00:16:46,739 --> 00:16:50,505
...a comedy club called the Loony Bin,
so do not forward my mail there.
228
00:16:50,710 --> 00:16:55,511
Oh, come on. So you were the victim
of a crime. That's part of life.
229
00:16:55,681 --> 00:16:58,343
When my great-grandfather
first came to this country...
230
00:16:58,518 --> 00:17:02,045
...he put all his hopes and dreams
into this little butcher shop...
231
00:17:02,221 --> 00:17:05,588
...he ran on the Lower East Side
of New York. You know what happened?
232
00:17:05,758 --> 00:17:08,022
Every customer who
walked into that butcher shop...
233
00:17:08,194 --> 00:17:09,593
...and asked for a pound of liver...
234
00:17:10,930 --> 00:17:11,988
...got ripped off.
235
00:17:13,766 --> 00:17:18,533
But those people moved on,
and so should you.
236
00:17:18,738 --> 00:17:22,367
I am moving on.
I'm going to be a Bozite.
237
00:17:22,575 --> 00:17:24,440
They call themselves Bozites?
238
00:17:24,677 --> 00:17:28,545
They should. It's one of the first things
I plan to bring up upon arrival.
239
00:17:29,248 --> 00:17:32,411
Sheldon, I can't believe I'm saying this,
but I'm gonna miss you.
240
00:17:32,585 --> 00:17:36,715
Please, Penny. As you know, I'm not
comfortable with prolonged goodbyes...
241
00:17:36,889 --> 00:17:41,383
...and maudlin displays of emotion,
so I've prepared a short video.
242
00:17:44,564 --> 00:17:49,092
Greetings. As you know, I'm not
comfortable with prolonged goodbyes...
243
00:17:49,268 --> 00:17:53,432
...and maudlin displays of emotion,
so I've prepared this short video.
244
00:17:53,606 --> 00:17:59,101
The four of you are three of my closest
friends and one treasured acquaintance.
245
00:18:03,082 --> 00:18:06,483
Though I cannot state categorically
that my life will be diminished...
246
00:18:06,719 --> 00:18:11,918
...by not having you in it, I am
comfortable If you choose to believe that.
247
00:18:13,259 --> 00:18:17,093
Since you intend to remain
In this lawless metropolitan area...
248
00:18:17,263 --> 00:18:20,926
...statistics suggest that you will
succumb to tragic and gruesome ends...
249
00:18:21,100 --> 00:18:24,627
...before we meet again.
Live long and prosper.
250
00:18:27,273 --> 00:18:29,468
Sheldon, that's so...
251
00:18:31,944 --> 00:18:36,506
You might wanna lock the door
behind me. This isn't Bozeman.
252
00:18:40,519 --> 00:18:44,956
How the hell do I know who's the friend
and who's the acquaintance?
253
00:18:49,462 --> 00:18:53,193
That is a bracing cold.
An invigorating cold.
254
00:18:53,366 --> 00:18:56,164
Lord, is it cold.
255
00:18:57,503 --> 00:18:59,471
Help you with your bag, sir?
256
00:18:59,672 --> 00:19:02,163
Thank you, fellow Bozite.
257
00:19:02,341 --> 00:19:04,866
And may I say,
you are the living embodiment...
258
00:19:05,044 --> 00:19:09,481
...of all the promises made by
our lovely town's chamber of commerce.
259
00:19:13,486 --> 00:19:17,547
Wait.
260
00:19:18,491 --> 00:19:20,322
Excuse me!
261
00:19:30,069 --> 00:19:34,005
One ticket to
Pasadena, California, please.
262
00:19:42,648 --> 00:19:45,048
Hey, look who's back.
263
00:19:45,217 --> 00:19:49,517
Interesting. The acquaintance is
the first to greet me.
22022
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