Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:04,903 --> 00:00:07,238
Give me an explanation
why the pharmacist has to be...
2
00:00:07,399 --> 00:00:10,660
...two and a half feet up
above everybody else.
3
00:00:11,015 --> 00:00:14,627
What the hell is he doing he can't be
on the floor with you and me?
4
00:00:14,791 --> 00:00:18,500
Brain surgeons, airline pilots, nuclear
physicists, we're on the same level.
5
00:00:18,855 --> 00:00:21,888
Oh, no, he's gotta be
two and a half feet up.
6
00:00:22,054 --> 00:00:25,403
''Look out, everybody,
I'm working with pills.
7
00:00:25,702 --> 00:00:27,644
Spread out, give me some room.''
8
00:00:28,166 --> 00:00:30,784
The only hard part of his whole job
that I could see...
9
00:00:30,982 --> 00:00:33,699
...is typing everything
onto that little, tiny label.
10
00:00:34,214 --> 00:00:36,767
And has to try and get
all the words on there...
11
00:00:36,934 --> 00:00:40,349
...keep the little piece of paper
in the roller of the typewriter.
12
00:00:40,518 --> 00:00:43,485
Oh, no. He's gotta be
two and a half feet up.
13
00:00:43,654 --> 00:00:47,745
''Yeah, I'd like to get this
prescription filled.''
14
00:00:47,910 --> 00:00:51,259
''All right. You wait down there.
15
00:00:51,557 --> 00:00:53,150
Only I'm allowed up here.''
16
00:00:59,493 --> 00:01:01,664
-Where'd you meet her?
-I met her on an elevator.
17
00:01:01,829 --> 00:01:04,545
On an elevator?
You met a woman on an elevator?
18
00:01:04,709 --> 00:01:07,458
-Impossible, right?
-You got less than 60 seconds.
19
00:01:07,620 --> 00:01:09,987
That's like dismantling a time bomb.
20
00:01:10,372 --> 00:01:12,990
-What got into you?
-I don't know. She was so beautiful...
21
00:01:13,156 --> 00:01:14,880
...it was a pure reflex. The words...
22
00:01:15,044 --> 00:01:17,858
-...just came out of my mouth.
-Wow. What did you say?
23
00:01:19,652 --> 00:01:23,132
You know, I'm the one responsible
for those crop circles in England.
24
00:01:25,507 --> 00:01:27,711
-Can you believe I did that?
-What did she say?
25
00:01:27,876 --> 00:01:29,883
What crop circles?
26
00:01:31,652 --> 00:01:33,921
-Not a good sign.
-Not everybody knows...
27
00:01:34,084 --> 00:01:37,083
...what the crop circles are.
You know what the crop circles are?
28
00:01:37,251 --> 00:01:39,291
Crop circles?
Why don't you buy something?
29
00:01:39,748 --> 00:01:41,209
You got something in your teeth.
30
00:01:41,667 --> 00:01:43,391
-What?
-It's green.
31
00:01:43,555 --> 00:01:47,548
Oh, man, spinach. I've been
walking around like this all afternoon.
32
00:01:47,715 --> 00:01:51,359
-You bump into anybody you knew?
-I had a job interview.
33
00:01:51,747 --> 00:01:54,048
-How did it go?
-Take a guess.
34
00:01:54,210 --> 00:01:57,244
Well, Mr. Costanza, we have nothing
available at the present time...
35
00:01:57,410 --> 00:01:59,582
...but should anything open up,
we'll be in touch.
36
00:02:00,003 --> 00:02:01,791
Okay, thanks.
37
00:02:02,914 --> 00:02:04,572
You don't need a job.
You got Audrey.
38
00:02:04,738 --> 00:02:06,494
Yeah. Right.
39
00:02:07,234 --> 00:02:09,144
-What's the matter?
-No. Nothing.
40
00:02:09,826 --> 00:02:11,898
-What?
-You won't think I'm a bad person?
41
00:02:12,226 --> 00:02:13,687
Too late for that.
42
00:02:13,857 --> 00:02:17,632
Because, believe me, I would only say
this to you and maybe a psychiatrist.
43
00:02:17,986 --> 00:02:19,512
What is it?
44
00:02:19,681 --> 00:02:21,110
Well....
45
00:02:22,721 --> 00:02:24,510
Her nose is a little big.
46
00:02:26,145 --> 00:02:27,454
Yeah, she's got a big nose.
47
00:02:28,577 --> 00:02:30,944
I mean, big would even be okay.
48
00:02:31,488 --> 00:02:32,699
It's beyond big.
49
00:02:34,145 --> 00:02:35,933
It's a schnoz.
50
00:02:36,737 --> 00:02:38,646
I'm aware that my own
physical dimensions...
51
00:02:38,816 --> 00:02:41,467
-...are a little short of perfection.
-A little.
52
00:02:41,664 --> 00:02:43,868
Who am I to be thinking
about someone's nose?
53
00:02:44,032 --> 00:02:48,091
I should be grateful someone like her
looks at me. I have no job, nothing.
54
00:02:48,768 --> 00:02:50,556
But I have to say,
I think about the nose.
55
00:02:51,072 --> 00:02:54,650
I don't wanna think about it, I don't ask
to think about it, but I think about it.
56
00:02:54,848 --> 00:02:58,776
I go to bed, I tell myself, ''Don't
think about the nose.'' I think about it.
57
00:02:58,975 --> 00:03:01,877
I look at her, I see the nose.
58
00:03:02,783 --> 00:03:05,150
Stop being so concerned with looks.
59
00:03:12,703 --> 00:03:16,249
-Have you said anything to her?
-No. Could never do that.
60
00:03:16,415 --> 00:03:18,455
The ironic thing is,
if she had a smaller nose...
61
00:03:18,623 --> 00:03:22,714
...I never could've dated her. She'd be
out of my league with a smaller nose.
62
00:03:23,263 --> 00:03:26,263
And I really like her. I know that.
63
00:03:26,431 --> 00:03:28,372
And I know one other thing:
64
00:03:28,863 --> 00:03:30,902
I'm not getting past that nose.
65
00:03:32,446 --> 00:03:34,104
All right, shut up. Here they come.
66
00:03:34,718 --> 00:03:37,304
How can I not think about it?
Look at the size of this thing.
67
00:03:39,134 --> 00:03:43,225
My mother's going out with this guy
who leaves a jacket in her house.
68
00:03:43,389 --> 00:03:47,513
She gives to me. Well, two years later,
he shows up and takes it back.
69
00:03:47,870 --> 00:03:51,383
Now he's in prison.
Got arrested for mail fraud.
70
00:03:51,837 --> 00:03:56,344
So, Elaine, go over to the apartment,
tell the landlord you're his daughter...
71
00:03:56,510 --> 00:03:58,265
...and you wanna bring him
the jacket.
72
00:03:58,429 --> 00:04:00,917
Won't the landlord know
I'm not the daughter?
73
00:04:01,085 --> 00:04:03,474
No, he's never met her.
She's in California.
74
00:04:04,573 --> 00:04:07,922
-Are you coming with me?
-Yeah, I have to. I'm your fiancé.
75
00:04:10,333 --> 00:04:11,893
Peter Von Nostrand.
76
00:04:12,061 --> 00:04:14,100
Why don't you just
commit yourself already?
77
00:04:15,357 --> 00:04:16,982
What is so special
about this jacket?
78
00:04:17,148 --> 00:04:19,352
-No, you don't wanna know.
-God....
79
00:04:19,516 --> 00:04:23,477
He believes it possesses some
extraordinary power over women.
80
00:04:23,644 --> 00:04:25,368
What's that splotch on your hand?
81
00:04:25,532 --> 00:04:28,379
I got stamped at the
reggae lounge last night.
82
00:04:28,540 --> 00:04:31,856
I'm going back there tonight. I'm not
gonna pay another cover charge.
83
00:04:33,276 --> 00:04:34,585
You didn't wash all day?
84
00:04:34,908 --> 00:04:37,941
Yeah, I washed. Just not the hand.
85
00:04:39,708 --> 00:04:42,555
You wouldn't believe the women
at this club. Man.
86
00:04:42,811 --> 00:04:45,560
It's amazing how many
beautiful women live in New York.
87
00:04:45,755 --> 00:04:47,610
I actually find it kind of intimidating.
88
00:04:47,771 --> 00:04:50,520
You're as pretty as any of them.
Just need a nose job.
89
00:04:56,858 --> 00:04:59,444
-Kramer!
-What? What?
90
00:04:59,611 --> 00:05:01,683
How could you say
something like that?
91
00:05:01,850 --> 00:05:04,119
What do you mean?
I just said she needs a nose job.
92
00:05:04,282 --> 00:05:07,064
No, no. There's nothing wrong
with her nose.
93
00:05:07,226 --> 00:05:09,943
-God, I'm so sorry, Audrey.
-Oh, it's okay.
94
00:05:10,106 --> 00:05:13,368
-What did you have to say that for?
-I was just trying to help out.
95
00:05:14,202 --> 00:05:18,326
Yeah, well, you can kiss that jacket
goodbye, Mr. Von Nausen.
96
00:05:20,218 --> 00:05:22,258
You see what happens
when you try to be nice?
97
00:05:23,802 --> 00:05:25,809
But what would the world be like...
98
00:05:26,009 --> 00:05:28,148
...if people said whatever
they were thinking...
99
00:05:28,793 --> 00:05:30,964
...all the time,
whenever it came to them?
100
00:05:31,289 --> 00:05:34,355
How long would a blind date last?
101
00:05:34,521 --> 00:05:36,431
About 1 3 seconds, I think.
102
00:05:36,825 --> 00:05:39,574
''Sorry, your rear end is too big.''
''Okay, your breath stinks.''
103
00:05:39,737 --> 00:05:42,704
''See you later. No problem. Goodbye.''
''Okay, thank you very much.''
104
00:05:43,321 --> 00:05:46,168
Elaine said I can stay with her
another month till Tina gets back.
105
00:05:47,128 --> 00:05:48,557
What are you thinking about?
106
00:05:49,464 --> 00:05:51,188
Thinking? Nothing.
107
00:05:51,353 --> 00:05:53,524
What could I possibly be thinking?
108
00:05:53,912 --> 00:05:56,367
You look like you've got something
on your mind.
109
00:05:56,536 --> 00:06:00,431
Yeah, right. I wish I had
something on my mind.
110
00:06:05,304 --> 00:06:06,678
So how about that Kramer?
111
00:06:07,224 --> 00:06:09,199
Yeah, how about him?
112
00:06:09,367 --> 00:06:13,012
-The way he just says stuff.
-He sure does.
113
00:06:13,176 --> 00:06:14,964
Yeah, yeah.
114
00:06:15,831 --> 00:06:17,806
Yeah, he's quite a character.
115
00:06:18,775 --> 00:06:20,880
So, what did you think?
116
00:06:21,271 --> 00:06:22,612
About the pizza?
117
00:06:23,255 --> 00:06:25,491
No. About the nose job.
118
00:06:26,135 --> 00:06:29,266
Oh, the nose job. Yeah....
119
00:06:29,558 --> 00:06:30,965
I don't know. I--
120
00:06:31,575 --> 00:06:35,284
-Well, what did you think?
-Well, I've thought about it...
121
00:06:35,542 --> 00:06:38,193
-...but I don't know.
-Yeah.
122
00:06:40,182 --> 00:06:43,281
You know, not that I care
one way or the other...
123
00:06:43,447 --> 00:06:47,156
...but these doctors today do amazing
things. lf you were so inclined.
124
00:06:47,350 --> 00:06:51,757
-And again, I'm not suggesting.
-I know. They're good.
125
00:06:51,926 --> 00:06:53,519
Peter Jennings had one.
126
00:06:53,686 --> 00:06:55,758
-Really?
-Probably. They all do.
127
00:06:55,926 --> 00:06:58,861
In my high school,
half my graduating class had them.
128
00:06:59,029 --> 00:07:01,298
Of course,
I'm from Long Island, so....
129
00:07:05,205 --> 00:07:07,442
It's really nothing.
It's like going to the dentist.
130
00:07:08,181 --> 00:07:11,377
-I hate the dentist.
-It's a cleaning.
131
00:07:13,141 --> 00:07:14,799
So you really think I should do this.
132
00:07:15,509 --> 00:07:19,437
lf it makes you happy.
I don't focus on these things.
133
00:07:21,204 --> 00:07:22,928
I will tell you this, though.
134
00:07:24,052 --> 00:07:26,060
Unfortunately...
135
00:07:26,228 --> 00:07:28,814
...we live in a very
superficial society.
136
00:07:30,068 --> 00:07:31,694
I don't condone it...
137
00:07:32,788 --> 00:07:33,998
...but it's a fact of life.
138
00:07:35,348 --> 00:07:37,170
Well, maybe I should.
139
00:07:37,684 --> 00:07:40,750
-What the hell?
-Now you talked her into a nose job?
140
00:07:40,916 --> 00:07:43,915
-Me? I didn't say anything.
-You encouraged her to get one.
141
00:07:44,083 --> 00:07:46,800
-I didn't encourage. No encourage.
-''Peter Jennings had one''?
142
00:07:47,508 --> 00:07:48,718
It's possible.
143
00:07:49,011 --> 00:07:52,360
-You should accept her for who she is.
-No, George is right.
144
00:07:52,531 --> 00:07:54,833
-I wanna get one.
-I think it's a mistake.
145
00:07:54,995 --> 00:07:56,588
Me too. Really.
146
00:07:58,067 --> 00:07:59,922
Unless you'd really like one, then....
147
00:08:03,123 --> 00:08:04,945
I'm going straight to hell.
148
00:08:06,099 --> 00:08:07,309
No two ways about it.
149
00:08:07,474 --> 00:08:10,125
It might not be hell,
but you're gonna run into bad dudes.
150
00:08:12,306 --> 00:08:14,641
Get the check.
She takes the bandages off at 4:00.
151
00:08:14,802 --> 00:08:16,395
We have time.
152
00:08:17,394 --> 00:08:19,401
It's exciting.
She's gonna have a new face.
153
00:08:19,922 --> 00:08:23,435
-It is exciting.
-Not as exciting as Miss Crop Circles.
154
00:08:24,178 --> 00:08:26,960
Please, please. Isabel?
155
00:08:27,122 --> 00:08:30,351
She is the most despicable woman
I have ever met in my life.
156
00:08:30,513 --> 00:08:34,157
I have never been so repulsed
by someone mentally...
157
00:08:34,321 --> 00:08:37,834
...and so attracted to them physically
at the same time.
158
00:08:38,001 --> 00:08:41,514
It's like my brain is facing my penis
in a chess game.
159
00:08:46,161 --> 00:08:47,787
And I'm letting him win.
160
00:08:48,209 --> 00:08:50,794
You're not letting him win.
He wins till you're 40.
161
00:08:50,961 --> 00:08:54,409
-Then what?
-He still wins, but it's not a blowout.
162
00:08:56,560 --> 00:08:58,022
She wants to be an actress.
163
00:08:58,193 --> 00:09:01,935
She makes me read these moronic
acting scenes with her, and I do it.
164
00:09:02,289 --> 00:09:06,795
Because I'm so addicted to the sex,
I'm helpless. I'll do anything.
165
00:09:07,056 --> 00:09:09,227
So, finally, Kramer comes in
the other day.
166
00:09:09,648 --> 00:09:11,688
I don't want to see this woman
anymore...
167
00:09:11,856 --> 00:09:14,343
...but I haven't got the willpower
to throw out her number.
168
00:09:14,512 --> 00:09:16,138
Please help me.
169
00:09:16,976 --> 00:09:18,350
Help me.
170
00:09:23,056 --> 00:09:24,266
I'm proud of you.
171
00:09:26,831 --> 00:09:29,548
So I'm never gonna see her again.
I'm going cold turkey.
172
00:09:29,711 --> 00:09:31,020
Good for you.
173
00:09:32,431 --> 00:09:34,951
I'll tell you, the sex....
174
00:09:36,367 --> 00:09:38,788
I was like an animal.
175
00:09:38,990 --> 00:09:41,030
I mean, it was just
completely uninhibited.
176
00:09:41,966 --> 00:09:46,341
It's like going to the bathroom in front
of a lot of people, and not caring.
177
00:09:50,798 --> 00:09:52,707
It's not like that at all.
178
00:09:57,102 --> 00:09:59,077
How do you even know
the jacket is there?
179
00:09:59,918 --> 00:10:01,227
Well, I don't. I'm guessing.
180
00:10:01,869 --> 00:10:04,717
Okay, look, Audrey,
before you take the bandage off...
181
00:10:05,134 --> 00:10:07,981
...just remember, I was the one
that encouraged you to do this.
182
00:10:08,174 --> 00:10:11,851
Now that you're gonna be a great
beauty, let's not forget how this began.
183
00:10:12,014 --> 00:10:14,283
-lf you listened to your friend Elaine--
-George.
184
00:10:14,605 --> 00:10:15,979
-Yeah?
-Enough.
185
00:10:16,141 --> 00:10:17,548
-Right, enough.
-Are we ready?
186
00:10:17,709 --> 00:10:19,498
Come on,
let's get this show on the road.
187
00:10:19,693 --> 00:10:22,082
-You sure you want us here for this?
-Yes.
188
00:10:22,413 --> 00:10:25,708
-Shouldn't a doctor do it?
-No, he said I could do it.
189
00:10:25,868 --> 00:10:27,592
Okay, here goes.
190
00:10:27,757 --> 00:10:31,269
This is very exciting. Very exciting.
It's like watching a birth.
191
00:10:35,948 --> 00:10:37,672
It looks good.
192
00:10:38,668 --> 00:10:41,123
-Great job.
-You got butchered.
193
00:10:48,172 --> 00:10:50,179
Head hurt.
No, I'm good. I'm fine.
194
00:10:50,412 --> 00:10:52,299
Let's put him over here.
195
00:10:53,355 --> 00:10:55,428
-Where are you going?
-To that doctor.
196
00:10:55,660 --> 00:10:57,482
Wait, wait, wait! I'll go with you.
197
00:11:06,955 --> 00:11:08,711
How you feeling?
198
00:11:09,707 --> 00:11:12,293
Too much salt in my diet.
199
00:11:13,098 --> 00:11:15,432
-Can I get you anything?
-I'm good.
200
00:11:15,915 --> 00:11:18,151
You sure? Anything.
201
00:11:20,202 --> 00:11:21,631
No.
202
00:11:25,066 --> 00:11:27,488
Boy, it really didn't come out
too well, did it?
203
00:11:27,754 --> 00:11:31,070
No, it didn't. No, it didn't.
204
00:11:32,170 --> 00:11:33,577
It's, like, all dented.
205
00:11:35,114 --> 00:11:36,837
Seems to be.
206
00:11:39,402 --> 00:11:41,409
Well, I'm sure
they'll be able to fix it.
207
00:11:41,642 --> 00:11:46,344
You can't stop modern science.
Can't stop it. Can't stop science.
208
00:11:46,505 --> 00:11:49,374
Can't be stopped. No way, no how.
Science just marches--
209
00:11:49,545 --> 00:11:51,487
Shut up, George.
210
00:11:53,545 --> 00:11:55,716
-Shut up?
-Yeah.
211
00:11:57,801 --> 00:11:59,361
Interesting.
212
00:12:02,249 --> 00:12:04,223
Come on, Kramer.
Seriously, give me her number!
213
00:12:04,392 --> 00:12:05,919
-I threw it out.
-You're lying.
214
00:12:06,089 --> 00:12:08,260
-You've got it. I want the number.
-I threw it out.
215
00:12:08,456 --> 00:12:10,431
-Give it to me.
-You said not to.
216
00:12:10,600 --> 00:12:13,185
-You made me promise.
-I changed my mind. I want it.
217
00:12:13,352 --> 00:12:15,239
You said no matter what,
I'm not to give it to you.
218
00:12:15,400 --> 00:12:17,472
-I was lying. Give it to me.
-You told me not to.
219
00:12:17,640 --> 00:12:20,454
-I want the number!
-All right! You want it? Yeah!
220
00:12:20,840 --> 00:12:23,906
Yeah! Yeah! Yeah.
Yeah, look at you.
221
00:12:24,199 --> 00:12:26,109
Look at what you've sunk to.
222
00:12:26,279 --> 00:12:27,588
Look at what you've become.
223
00:12:27,879 --> 00:12:30,781
Look in the mirror, because you
need help, Jerry. You need help.
224
00:12:31,271 --> 00:12:34,980
Because I can't stand by and do it
anymore. It's turning my stomach.
225
00:12:35,143 --> 00:12:38,439
I can't stand around here
watching you destroy yourself!
226
00:12:38,599 --> 00:12:40,868
It's eating me up inside!
227
00:12:51,942 --> 00:12:56,895
The doctor said they need to build the
lateral wall of the septum. Over here.
228
00:12:57,094 --> 00:12:58,304
Yeah.
229
00:12:58,502 --> 00:13:01,152
-You see this paranasal sinus cavity?
-Oh, I got it.
230
00:13:01,318 --> 00:13:05,693
See how it's collapsed?
That's what's causing this huge dent.
231
00:13:05,862 --> 00:13:08,131
Yeah. Rough, rough.
232
00:13:09,382 --> 00:13:11,389
So anyway, you know what
I was thinking about?
233
00:13:11,941 --> 00:13:13,151
What?
234
00:13:13,317 --> 00:13:16,067
Remember we talked
about taking a trip together?
235
00:13:16,293 --> 00:13:20,352
-We did?
-We talked about going to Hawaii.
236
00:13:20,870 --> 00:13:22,909
-Hawaii?
-Anyway, I think it would be great...
237
00:13:23,077 --> 00:13:25,565
...to get away after all this.
238
00:13:26,180 --> 00:13:27,587
Well, you--
239
00:13:29,733 --> 00:13:32,099
You know, Hawaii could be
a little tricky now.
240
00:13:32,261 --> 00:13:34,944
There's high-pressure winds
down there this time of year.
241
00:13:35,109 --> 00:13:38,109
There's a lot of debris
constantly flying around, a lot of...
242
00:13:38,276 --> 00:13:40,316
...wood and lava.
243
00:13:40,677 --> 00:13:42,171
It could be dangerous.
244
00:13:42,372 --> 00:13:45,787
-I never heard that.
-Oh, yeah. My friend lived there, so....
245
00:13:46,116 --> 00:13:48,571
We could go to the Caribbean.
246
00:13:49,604 --> 00:13:52,473
I have to tell you something.
You couldn't get me on a plane now.
247
00:13:52,772 --> 00:13:54,659
I get those FAA reports directly.
248
00:13:54,852 --> 00:13:57,699
My uncle sends them to me.
He used to be a pilot, so....
249
00:13:58,211 --> 00:13:59,902
Big investigation in the....
250
00:14:00,580 --> 00:14:04,955
What's the word there?
Offing. It's in the offing.
251
00:14:05,284 --> 00:14:10,619
But you shouldn't let that stop you
from going. You could go. I don't mind.
252
00:14:11,523 --> 00:14:13,410
-George?
-Yeah.
253
00:14:13,731 --> 00:14:15,803
I don't think this is working.
254
00:14:16,867 --> 00:14:21,787
Ever since you came back from
the Army, you've changed.
255
00:14:22,563 --> 00:14:27,135
I swear, Nelson, I don't even know
who you are anymore.
256
00:14:27,363 --> 00:14:29,337
I'm Nelson.
257
00:14:30,626 --> 00:14:34,172
-That's not the line, Jerry.
-All right, all right, I'm sorry.
258
00:14:35,426 --> 00:14:39,452
Nothing's changed, Elma.
I just need more time.
259
00:14:40,994 --> 00:14:45,150
I swear, Nelson, sometimes at
night when you're not around...
260
00:14:45,921 --> 00:14:49,336
...I just go crazy thinking
about you.
261
00:14:49,761 --> 00:14:51,223
Well, you just need to relax.
262
00:14:52,993 --> 00:14:54,651
Maybe a hobby. Bowling is fun.
263
00:14:55,713 --> 00:14:59,258
Yeah, bowling's good,
if you're really gross and ugly.
264
00:14:59,937 --> 00:15:02,304
Uh-oh. My organsare playing chess again.
265
00:15:02,465 --> 00:15:06,294
I'm getting tired of this. What do you
say we play one for all the marbles?
266
00:15:06,465 --> 00:15:09,847
Oh, brain, what are you doing?
You cannot beat me.
267
00:15:10,016 --> 00:15:13,365
Do you have any idea who you're
dealing with? Forget about it.
268
00:15:13,537 --> 00:15:14,966
I can't take her anymore.
269
00:15:15,136 --> 00:15:18,649
-I hate reading her little acting scenes.
-Oh, so what?
270
00:15:18,816 --> 00:15:20,507
So you read from a little play.
271
00:15:20,672 --> 00:15:24,020
You can't put up with that for an hour
to make me happy? You're so selfish.
272
00:15:24,192 --> 00:15:25,785
Give me one hour.
273
00:15:26,240 --> 00:15:29,022
Then I will take over. You won't
have to think for the rest of the night.
274
00:15:29,184 --> 00:15:30,558
What about tomorrow morning?
275
00:15:30,720 --> 00:15:34,135
Do you have any idea what
that's like for me? Do you care?
276
00:15:34,304 --> 00:15:35,733
No, you don't care.
277
00:15:35,903 --> 00:15:39,351
So long as you get to do
whatever it is you do.
278
00:15:39,519 --> 00:15:41,940
-You disgust me.
-Oh, go read a book.
279
00:15:42,111 --> 00:15:44,980
Enough chatter. Let's play.
280
00:15:45,823 --> 00:15:48,671
I'm only doing this because
you took Audrey to the hospital.
281
00:15:48,895 --> 00:15:52,091
Yeah. Yeah. Okay, now, you're clear?
You got everything?
282
00:15:52,254 --> 00:15:53,749
-Yeah.
-Wait, wait, wait.
283
00:15:55,326 --> 00:15:56,570
Here.
284
00:15:56,991 --> 00:16:00,220
-What do I need this for?
-Because we're engaged.
285
00:16:00,894 --> 00:16:02,934
We're engaged?
286
00:16:03,326 --> 00:16:04,984
Kramer, this is too big.
287
00:16:05,470 --> 00:16:08,667
-It's my mom's.
-Hello!
288
00:16:08,830 --> 00:16:13,107
Oh, hi. I'm Wanda Pepper.
I'm Albert Pepper's daughter.
289
00:16:13,278 --> 00:16:15,765
My father asked me to pick up
his jacket for him.
290
00:16:15,934 --> 00:16:18,170
Hello, Miss Pepper.
It's a pleasure to meet you.
291
00:16:18,398 --> 00:16:20,634
And you must be
Professor Von Nostrand.
292
00:16:20,797 --> 00:16:22,007
Yes. Yes, I am.
293
00:16:22,750 --> 00:16:26,262
I've read your book, professor,
and I was quite intrigued by it.
294
00:16:26,750 --> 00:16:29,597
-Yes, well, it's very intriguing.
-Tell me...
295
00:16:29,757 --> 00:16:32,888
...is it your contention that
Shakespeare was an imposter?
296
00:16:33,053 --> 00:16:34,460
-My contention?
-Your contention.
297
00:16:34,621 --> 00:16:37,621
-Well, yes, that's my contention.
-I heard him contend that.
298
00:16:37,949 --> 00:16:39,804
It's too bad about your father.
299
00:16:39,965 --> 00:16:43,543
-It was a frame-up.
-A fine man. He spoke often of you.
300
00:16:43,709 --> 00:16:45,945
He's very proud of the work
you're doing.
301
00:16:46,332 --> 00:16:49,944
-We're all proud of the work I'm doing.
-Yes, she does fine work.
302
00:16:50,141 --> 00:16:54,450
Your father gave me strict orders
not to turn the jacket over to anyone...
303
00:16:54,620 --> 00:16:57,173
...but I suppose I can make
an exception in your case.
304
00:16:57,340 --> 00:16:59,412
-The closet's this way.
-How kind of you.
305
00:16:59,643 --> 00:17:02,610
You know, your father has a very
extensive wardrobe.
306
00:17:02,779 --> 00:17:04,372
Yes.
307
00:17:08,572 --> 00:17:10,960
What's the matter, fella?
You look a little tired.
308
00:17:11,899 --> 00:17:13,841
Nelson, don't you see?
309
00:17:15,259 --> 00:17:17,430
You are a part of me.
310
00:17:18,139 --> 00:17:19,829
And l....
311
00:17:20,443 --> 00:17:22,931
I am a part of you.
312
00:17:23,675 --> 00:17:25,049
She's killing me.
313
00:17:31,322 --> 00:17:32,696
That's your move?
314
00:17:32,858 --> 00:17:35,509
-Yeah.
-Well, that's trouble, my friend.
315
00:17:35,674 --> 00:17:37,430
That's big trouble.
316
00:17:37,722 --> 00:17:39,064
Checkmate.
317
00:17:41,658 --> 00:17:44,211
Getting weak. Losing power.
318
00:17:44,922 --> 00:17:48,085
You haven't seen the last of me.
I'll be back.
319
00:17:48,570 --> 00:17:52,181
You're nothing without me.
Nothing.
320
00:17:54,202 --> 00:17:55,925
Little punk.
321
00:17:58,425 --> 00:18:01,589
Isabel, I don't think this is working.
322
00:18:05,465 --> 00:18:08,149
Daddy certainly does have
an extensive wardrobe.
323
00:18:08,313 --> 00:18:13,014
He is a fine dresser. I don't have to tell
you he's quite popular with the ladies.
324
00:18:13,272 --> 00:18:16,589
My father? Really? I had no idea.
325
00:18:16,760 --> 00:18:18,004
They're crazy about him.
326
00:18:18,168 --> 00:18:21,484
One in particular came around
about two years ago.
327
00:18:22,072 --> 00:18:24,789
Looked a lot like you, professor.
Could have been your mother.
328
00:18:25,177 --> 00:18:27,348
What was her name again?
329
00:18:27,832 --> 00:18:30,003
Carter? Kramer. That's it.
330
00:18:30,264 --> 00:18:33,363
Babs Kramer. Nasty woman.
331
00:18:33,528 --> 00:18:35,666
Many a night I had to
throw her on the street...
332
00:18:35,832 --> 00:18:38,221
-...drunken stumblebum.
-You don't say.
333
00:18:38,392 --> 00:18:41,621
-I found it!
-She walked around here half-naked...
334
00:18:41,784 --> 00:18:44,947
...sucking Colt 45 from a can.
335
00:18:45,111 --> 00:18:49,006
Her big, fat stomach hanging out,
orthopedic hose up to her knees...
336
00:18:49,176 --> 00:18:50,899
...screaming down the hall:
337
00:18:51,063 --> 00:18:53,812
''Come back to bed, Albert,
you big hairy ape!
338
00:18:53,975 --> 00:18:57,587
And bring back that box of Danish!''
339
00:18:59,063 --> 00:19:01,681
-So I grabbed the guy by the collar.
-Yeah, and I yelled out:
340
00:19:01,847 --> 00:19:04,181
''Kramer, Kramer, you're killing him.''
341
00:19:04,758 --> 00:19:07,246
-So I assume the jig was up.
-Yeah, pretty much.
342
00:19:07,415 --> 00:19:09,105
But look.
343
00:19:09,431 --> 00:19:10,859
Yes.
344
00:19:12,054 --> 00:19:14,869
-Hi. Here are your keys.
-Hi. Thank you.
345
00:19:15,030 --> 00:19:16,940
-Hello.
-Audrey.
346
00:19:18,102 --> 00:19:21,102
My God, you look incredible.
I can't believe it.
347
00:19:21,814 --> 00:19:24,814
Well, it was his doctor.
He was wonderful.
348
00:19:25,109 --> 00:19:26,865
So will I see you later tonight?
349
00:19:27,381 --> 00:19:29,356
Not sure.
350
00:19:31,221 --> 00:19:33,741
Well, I'll check you guys out later.
351
00:19:34,485 --> 00:19:36,307
-Ready?
-I didn't wash.
352
00:19:36,470 --> 00:19:38,324
Neither did l.
353
00:19:38,837 --> 00:19:41,204
We're off to the reggae lounge.
354
00:19:48,181 --> 00:19:51,825
My nose, my nose.
My kingdom for a nose.
355
00:19:52,436 --> 00:19:56,746
Isn't she beautiful? Her nose
is in such perfect proportions...
356
00:19:56,916 --> 00:19:59,437
...to the rest of her face.
She's breathtaking.
357
00:19:59,604 --> 00:20:01,971
-Who would have thought, she's--?
-Elaine...
358
00:20:02,516 --> 00:20:04,076
...shut up.
359
00:20:05,684 --> 00:20:08,433
The technical term
for a nose job is...?
360
00:20:08,628 --> 00:20:11,530
-Rhinoplasty.
-Rhinoplasty.
361
00:20:12,243 --> 00:20:15,342
Rhino. Okay?
362
00:20:16,372 --> 00:20:21,161
Do we really need to insult the person
at this moment of their lives?
363
00:20:21,332 --> 00:20:24,266
They know they have a big nose.
That's why they're coming in.
364
00:20:24,435 --> 00:20:27,784
Do they really need the abuse
of being compared to a rhinoceros...
365
00:20:27,987 --> 00:20:30,059
...on top of everything else?
366
00:20:30,419 --> 00:20:32,655
When someone has a
hair transplant, they don't go:
367
00:20:32,818 --> 00:20:36,047
''We're going to perform a
cue ball-ectomy on you, Mr. Johnson.
368
00:20:36,787 --> 00:20:40,332
We're going to attempt to remove
the skinheadia...
369
00:20:40,498 --> 00:20:43,760
...of your chromedomus,
which is what we--
370
00:20:43,922 --> 00:20:46,343
The technical term....''
9999
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00
www.tvsubtitles.net
29966
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof