Original subtitles

RuPaul: Previously on RuPaul's Drag Race UK...

I want you to transform yourselves

into lockdown super she-roes.

-Go! -Aah!

This girl has got everything that was available.

I would love two of these.

Absolutely not.

This is not fair!

Now, you know, Baga Chipz did something like this.

-Mm-hmm. -It was a boot.

Yeah, well, mine's gonna be much better than that, darling.

Tayce.

Sort of from the waist down, it needed something else,

not just a sort of scratchy gash.

Sister Sister.

There's a lot happening.

-It's time for a bonfire. -A'Whora.

If I could give you a standing ovation, I would.

-I just love this. -Con-drag-ulations.

You are the winner of this week's challenge.

Sister Sister, sashay away.

It's genuinely been

the stupidest experience of my life.

[all laugh]

Whoo-hoo!

Oh, my goodness gracious me!

The lip sync's over, Sister's done, I'm still here.

I don't think you all thought I could do it, darling,

but, whoa, here I am.

Whose face is this? Tayce's.

"Hate your hair, hope you lose.

Absolutely love, you champions."

-Sister Sister. -"You camp cows."

Oh! What did I say?

Champions.

Oh, my God, I need glasses.

[all laugh]

How do you feel?

Because she did compete in that lip sync.

So it was, like, you couldn't write who was gonna get it.

You know, let's perform, that's what I do, you know.

You're a seamstress, you know?

You know, everyone has their strengths.

That is my strength.

Like, I live for the stage, I live to dance, so...

I think Tayce is on a bumpy road.

She is stiff competition... in a lip sync.

Oh!

But Tayce better watch out,

because the next chance that comes her way,

she needs to go fully into that,

or else Tayce could go home.

Well, A'Whora, it does pain me to say it,

but con-drag-ulations.

-Thank you. -You won.

I'm so happy.

Like, I was so--I put so much pressure on myself

after not winning the last sewing challenge.

So I just really wanted to redeem myself.

Yep, that's right.

One, two badges, and I'm ready for another one.

I was thoroughly surprised

when it got to you three in the bottom.

I was, like, what?

You have no idea how tight and clenched my hole was.

Well, you should keep it clenched, girl,

because it looks like you should get used to losing these days.

Ooh!

Mm, well, have fun catching up to me, bitch.

A'Whora seems to have had her redemption now,

and is she gonna out-badge me?

[mouths words]

There were 12 bitches up in here.

-Yeah. -Now there's five.

-I know. -Top five.

Top five!

So I put us all in the top five coming back after lockdown,

but would you have all put me in the same position

or do you think I've took someone else's spot

in this top five place?

No, I definitely had you in the top five.

I just had you going next in the top five,

so then we can be the top four.

Ellie doesn't have a badge.

It's getting to the nitty gritty now,

so it could be anyone's.

Because you've got three, we've got two, one.

-Zero. -None.

You literally do not even register me in your brain,

and it's really pissing me off.

Y'all better watch out, because I'm--

I need a badge to make the top four position.

Well, guess what? You're never gonna get it.

Never say never. Going to work now, bitch.

I'm really proud of myself getting this far,

but I need a badge

to prove myself to these other girls that I am competition.

I mean, look at this right now.

I mean, ding, ding, ding.

It is the London gals versus the Scots.

Well, the Scots are gonna overpower the London folk!

For freedom!

Werk!

This is where the competition really sets in.

We need to take these London bitches out.

We're gonna take your shitty drag,

put it in the bin.

You absolute hounds.

Only one of us can win.

La-di-da-di-da-di-da.

Swinging around the mulberry bush can only go on so long.

Oh, what's the name again, Sister Mister?

Wiped the floor with her, didn't I?

And I'll do it again.

But at the end of the day, I need to burn this mulberry bush,

and you're all going down with it, because I gotta win.

So back up.

I don't know what comes out of my mouth.

I don't know where this shit comes from.

[laughs]

♪ RuPaul's Drag Race ♪

RuPaul: The winner crowned the UK's Drag Race superstar

will receive an all expenses paid trip to Hollywood

to create their own digital series

with the producers of RuPaul's Drag Race.

Tonight, with Michelle Visage,

Alan Carr,

and extra-special guest judge Dawn French.

♪ May the best woman ♪

♪ Best woman win ♪

Top five, being alive.

-The fabulous five! -Oh, yes!

It's a new day in the werkroom.

It is top five,

so everyone better bring their A game.

And I can't wait to see what's next.

Miss Two Badges!

I know. I finally don't feel unbalanced in my walk.

Oh, how are we, Miss Ellie Diamond?

I don't see any badges on that, but I see two flowers.

Two flowers? Where? Oh, yeah, here.

[all laugh]

I'm, like, I'm okay.

I'm feeling, like, after last week in Untucked

I did feel some sort of way.

The past couple of weeks

I've sort of let the queens say what they wanna say about me,

but no more.

Like, it's the time now

where I really do need to stick up for myself

and be my own boss and be my own person.

I feel very underestimated by the rest of you girls,

and it's the sort of the thing

where it's, like, I do everything myself.

I do hair, outfits, like, the entire thing.

Like, y'all should not underestimate me.

You need to prove yourself.

If they don't win this challenge now and get a badge,

then...

need help packing?

Like, A'Whora especially.

You were, like, oh, the silhouette was very similar.

It was a completely different silhouette.

No, I just feel like

you wearing the outfit, I wasn't surprised.

Like, I wasn't shocked by it.

Yeah, but that's the way I interpreted it at the time,

to where I wanted to put my personality into that challenge.

All right, Ellie Diamond, pipe down.

Where the bloody hell has this come from?

It was to be a super she-ro, not to be Ellie Diamond.

But I am a super hero anyways.

[alarm]

RuPaul: Ooh, girl.

Her majesty done already done had herses.

Hey, sis. What's with that funny look on your face?

Come to think of it,

you've been acting kind of sketchy all season.

Why you gagging so?

You know she bring it to you every ball.

-A ball? -Acting?

-Sketch show? -Something comedy?

Hello, hello, hello!

[cheering]

Hey, ladykins!

-Hey! -Hey!

All right, let me get straight to the point.

There are many different kinds of drag,

so for today's mini-challenge,

you need to serve us your best macho drag

as you compete in the hottest new singing show sensation,

The Masc 4 Masc Singer.

-Yes! -Ooh!

Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh.

Here's how it works.

One by one, you grab the mic

and give us your best butch performance

of my song Hey, Kitty Girl.

-Hey! -Yeah!

In the end, the most macho queen ends up on top.

Sound familiar?

-No, babe. -No.

-Me, neither. -What's a top?

Okay, you have 15 minutes

to get into quick macho drag.

Ready, set... Go, bro.

Wow!

This ain't gonna be hard for you, Lawrence, butch drag.

Yeah, well, every day.

Butch is something that has never been in my vocabulary.

I mean, each to their own,

but I have been repping femme.

Think of all those hot men out there, and give it Wally.

Let me put my sausage roll

in your chicken steak bake.

Chicken bake. I don't know.

I'm going a bit more androgynous with the look

rather than masculine.

-I love that. -You do you, girl.

With this look,

I've just sort of taken inspiration from the eighties

with the masculine bands that were straight men

that wore makeup and dressed in feminine clothes.

So what is masculine and what is feminine?

I'm sure I can whip something into shape.

Ooh!

I mean, I'm not gonna lie.

A'Whora's sort of turning me on with this look.

Like, I'm kind of into that,

like, leather sort of whips and chains.

So I was kind of feeling it.

All right, lads, let's go.

Roger Red is in the building.

[laughs]

This one's to my missus in the crowd,

I love you.

Can you feel my vibes?

You got me, Tasty Tim,

in front of your face. Let's go!

♪ Hey, kitty girl, it's your world ♪

♪ When you walk the streets, stepping to the beat ♪

♪ Hey, kitty girl ♪

♪ Get your twirl ♪

I love a twirl.

♪ In the disco heat ♪

♪ You're a boogie-body-rocking queen ♪

♪ La, da da-da-da ♪

-♪ Da-da ♪ -[laughs]

♪ Catwalking like the world is your run-run-runway ♪

♪ People say that when the dog is away ♪

-Ruff! -[laughs]

♪ The kitty cats are gonna come out and play ♪

♪ Hey, kitty girl, get your twirl ♪

♪ When you walk the street, dancing to the beat ♪

-♪ Hey, kitty girl ♪ -Whoo!

♪ Get your twirl ♪

♪ And your disco heat, you're a boogie-body-rocking queen ♪

-♪ Boogie-body-rocking queen ♪ -Whoo!

♪ Boogie-body-rocking queen ♪

♪ Boogie-body-rocking, Boogie-body-rocking ♪

♪ Boogie-body-rock, boogie body-rocking queen ♪

♪ Hey, hey, kitty, kitty, hey, ki-kitty ♪

♪ I like kitty women ♪

♪ Kitty, kitty, yeah ♪

Just to confirm, I've never heard of Lady Gaga.

♪ Hey, kitty, that's right ♪

I love you, Cheryl!

[laughs]

Thank you, Ru, that was amazing.

You really butch-ered my song.

You're welcome, baby.

[laughs]

One of you really rocked out with your frock out.

The winner of today's mini-challenge is...

Ellie Diamond!

Yeah! Rock on, that's right!

Ahh, I finally won something!

Thank God.

Oh, bless her, finally got herself a win.

Isn't that nice?

It's a shame it doesn't mean anything.

Con-drag-ulations, Ellie.

Now, duckies, even in the strangest of times

we find that laughter is the best medicine.

For this week's maxi-challenge,

you'll be putting on a comedy night,

celebrating the theme of love.

First, each of you needs to write a stand-up set

based on your observations about relationships, break-ups,

dating, unrequited love.

You know, all the Taylor Swift songs.

[chuckles]

Not this!

Stand-up?

Never done that in my life.

And then tomorrow on the main stage

you'll perform your comedy routine

in front of a real rough crowd:

a live audience of inanimate objects.

-Ooh! -What?

#DragRaceUK.

Now, Ellie Diamond,

as the winner of the mini-challenge,

you get to choose the order in which the queens perform.

Oh, very good, very good.

This is just the advantage I need right now

to get myself a badge.

Later today, to help,

you'll meet with our own stand-up superstar Alan Carr.

-Werk! -Ooh.

Then tomorrow on the main stage,

we will be joined by our extra-special guest judge,

a true British comedy legend...

Dawn French will be here.

[cheers and laughter]

The lucky bitch herself

is gonna be here judging us in a stand-up comedy show.

[chuckles] Pressure.

Racers, start your engines,

and may the best drag queen win.

See you later, Ru!

Have you done stand-up before, Ellie?

I have not done stand-up before.

Have you done any kind of comedy?

She does comedy every day getting into drag.

[laughs]

Clown. Clownery. Completely clownery.

Have you thought about the order?

I've took in consideration everyone's strong--

the strong comedy queens

and then the sort of weaker comedy queens.

Like, who do you see as strong and who do you see as weak?

Comedy queens is definitely Bimini and Lawrence, for sure.

Well, I'll tell you where you're all gonna be getting put,

since the power's in my hands.

This is a competition, and I'm here to play.

So first up to the comedy routine is going to be A'Whora.

Ooh!

Following A'Whora will be moi.

After moi will be Bimini.

After Bimini will be Lawrence.

And to close, we've got Tayce.

[laughs]

What?

If there's any sort of ill will to that,

definitely bring it up.

Let's hear, like, conversations about that.

Well, I just think it's a bit stupid, but...

Bimini's really funny and I'm really funny.

So basically if Bimini's more funny than me,

that's gonna set me up to fail.

She's meant to be my friend,

so I don't understand why Ellie has set it up like this for me.

I think it's a real kick in the teeth.

Well, what would you do, then?

Like, where would you place--

Oh, I would do, like, a shit sandwich.

So I would do the people, you know,

that are gonna be strong at the beginning and the end.

I think, like, with this running order you've put,

I think everyone's gonna struggle.

But is that not kind of what it's supposed to be?

And, like, if you're gonna struggle--

But you've not even set yourself up great.

I feel like personally,

that the first thing is the biggest one to do,

and you've put that onto me because you want me to crack.

And I think that just shows a lot about yourself, period.

Nobody wants to be the first one. Nobody.

No one wants to go out there

and open the show and set the bar.

That might make me look like a bad character, so be it.

Like, for the past couple of weeks,

it's been I haven't won a badge, and then this and that,

and, you know, the outfits and the silhouettes.

So you think-- just to clarify--

you think you're gonna win a badge this week?

I've got a pretty good chance

going after A'Whora.

[laughs]

But that's not--that's what I mean, let it--

Shots fired!

Like, let it be shady, let it have that moment

of, oh, Ellie's now being shady. That's fine.

But so be it.

No, but you know what?

To be honest, this just gives me a drive,

or like a fire up my ass to just be, like, you know what?

I wanna shit on you so hard.

Go for it. Go for it.

This is my chance and my time to use this to my advantage

to get myself a win and get myself a badge.

And I'm sure if one of those two had the power,

they would do the exact same thing.

Like, in their mind as well, this is a competition,

and I'm here to win and I'm here to play, as are they.

Okay. So A'Whora's first, I'm second.

Bimini, are you fine with your place just after me?

I think, like, I'll just go out and kill it wherever I am.

Yeah, and then Lawrence after Bimini, you okay?

Do not ask us if we're okay.

If you're gonna play the fucking game,

then fucking tick away your sheet,

and that's all good, you know?

Don't ask if we're all right.

Don't do that, because that's, like, whoo,

I can change everyone, but you're not gonna.

The anger in Lawrence's face,

the pompadour is going all over the shop.

She is not a happy bunny.

It's like, what are we, children?

Get over it. Like, it's a competition.

Girls, just take it like a fucking drag queen, innit?

And let's just go for it.

Ooh, people are pressed.

People are pressed.

Well, on that note, I'm gonna go take my first-the-worst set,

and I'm gonna go work on it alone. Thank you.

Ooh, she ain't happy, is she?

I feel pretty bad after that, to be honest.

-Really? -Yeah.

I mean, you gotta do what you gotta do, girl.

You won the challenge.

You can put people wherever the hell you want,

and you shouldn't feel bad for it.

But then it's like, it's one of those things

that works like I've made friends with A'Whora,

and me and Lawrence are really good friends as well,

so I don't want to throw them under a bus.

-Like, it's a competition. -But it's a competition.

It ain't RuPaul's Best Friend Race, is it, you know?

She's definitely playing, like, a huge game.

I see her game.

She wants me out of this competition.

Trying to sabotage me like that. Girl!

You messed with the wrong bitch.

At the end of the day, it's about your material.

-No matter where you are. -Yeah.

It's about the laughs at the end of the day.

To say I'm nervous is an understatement for sure.

I know it's gonna sound really petty,

but I just hope Ellie bombs so hard.

The race to get through to that final four

is clearly on.

Yikes on bikes. Yikes on bikes.

[laughs]

-Oi, oi. -Hiya, luv, you all right?

I'm not bad. I've been better, though, I will say.

Who would have thought I'd be on a stage

doing stand-up, taking advice from Alan Carr?

Who would believe it?

Are you nervous?

Motherfucking bitch has decided to put me first--

Oh, that is tough.

As a stand-up comedian, no one wants to be the first one up.

As long as you just go out there and make it bold,

you'll be fine, you'll be fine.

I mean, I've wrote quite a lot,

so we'll see how it goes.

But it was, in fact, my nan

who would give me the most advice with dating growing up.

You see, most people say that there's a huge, uncommon gap

between the older and younger generation.

But for me, I found that me and my nan

always had one thing that really helps us to bond:

we both had [bleep].

[stifles laugh]

Mm, yeah.

Right. Where can...um...

Constructive criticism. [laughs]

Alan is a little bit cruded out.

I don't know if I'm taking this a bit too far.

I mean, he's laughing, but I don't know if this is landing.

I wouldn't book a spot

at the Royal Variety Performance, but--

We're going for a different crowd, Alan, all right?

I'm just gonna try and put my best funny foot forward.

Hello!

Hello, Ellie!

This is really good for insight.

Not being a comedy queen,

I can sort of pick his brain

and take a lot of things from that,

then put into my brain

and get my comedy set really good.

Now, you did the running order.

I did, I did.

You've got yourself second.

I'm here to win.

I haven't won a badge yet,

and I feel like this is my moment

to really shine in this challenge.

Well, it's right putting them in this certain order,

but you've gotta shine, you've gotta be the best.

-Yeah. -Right, well, hit me with it.

Right, so, I mean,

I love everything starting with the word D.

I love doughnuts, dark chocolate,

um, well, I also love dick.

[deep voice] Ellie Diamond just loves dick!

-[laughs] -Sorry.

I've got a little bit of a dark side,

and her name's called Dirty Diamond.

I love your persona

and I love the... [deep voice]

the Exorcist. I loved it.

-The Dirty Diamond. -Yeah, yeah.

I think Alan likes a little Dirty Diamond.

I mean, who wouldn't?

But what I've come to realize in the past couple years

is that you've got to kiss a thousand frogs

-before you find your prince. -Yeah.

And I'm on about number 520,

so we're almost there, and I'll see you at the wedding.

I wonder whether your Exorcist voice,

maybe that could be the ending with the frog

-'Cause the joke's the frog. -Froggy.

Froggy and Groggy.

Maybe not Froggy and Groggy.

Bimini.

All right, babes.

You come straight from home base?

[laughs]

Now, I've only done stand-up twice.

One was in front of an audience,

one was on a Zoom, which was bad.

You know, I saw your Katie Price,

which was sensational, so I know you've got timing.

I'm gonna talk to you about love, sex, and relationships

as a queer person,

which is a bit like how a straight person should be:

illegal.

[laughs]

Now, it's difficult being gorgeous.

Not a joke, just a fact.

I met my boyfriend three and a half years ago.

Now, he's from Italy,

and he has a strong, classic, Italian name:

Steve.

[laughs]

If you're making Alan laugh, you're on the right track.

Wow.

Was that all right?

You must have done stand-up before.

I've done it twice before.

-Twice? -Yeah.

Well, I can't-- that was so funny.

I think I did a pretty good job.

Alan didn't give me too much direction,

but I don't know if it's a hindrance,

because I don't know if I could have gone further.

I can't wait to see the performance.

Thank you so much.

-Hi, Alan! -Hiya, Lawrence, luv.

I am very, very scared.

I bombed Snatch Game,

so I definitely have a lot of pressure on me with this one.

Let's listen to some of your stuff.

Hello, my name is Lawrence Chaney,

and I'm Scottish drag royalty.

Now, before we get started,

I'm going to address something very quickly

that I know you are all thinking in your heads.

No, there's no subtitles for this performance,

but just pretend you know what's going on, okay?

Just try and imagine it, okay?

And any Americans watching, I apologize.

Just watch the subtitles, please.

I would just lose the second subtitle thing.

Don't bother about doing a double hit with that joke.

-Right. -Because it's funny.

I know what you're thinking, subtitles.

And then it's not, like, right, okay, hurry.

Yeah, yeah, it's a funny joke, we get it, move on.

I need to snatch another badge

to just prove that I'm doing well in this competition

and I am a funny person.

-I can't wait to see it. -Thank you, Alan.

I hope I don't disappoint you, babes.

-Oh, Alan Carr. -Tayce!

I'm absolutely terrified that I have to do stand-up comedy,

especially about the subject of love.

So looking forward to this.

Oh, my God, well, it is gonna be a ride, so buckle up.

I mean, they were going on about,

ooh, we're gonna do stand-up--

love, sex, and relationships.

I was like, what love, what relationships, what sex?

Honey, my goodness.

Well, there's your opening line.

Well, there we go.

Okay, I'm just gonna go for it, see what happens here.

Okay, luv.

Now, I've never been in love,

unless we're talking about beans on toast,

and I can talk about that all day.

I've never had a boyfriend, not even--

Is this true? That's not true.

-You love beans on toast? -I live for beans on toast.

-You should talk about this. -Oh, I will.

If that's what you want, that's what I'll do.

-Oh, I will. -I'm getting aroused here.

But you know, I think you should do that.

And as someone who's sexy.

remember, you're gonna be sexy as a woman,

and then you're going, God, give me beans on toast.

Mmm. Well, I've got my homework.

I have no idea what I'm doing.

In this challenge, to be honest with you,

if I can just make sure I look absolutely stunning,

maybe it'll distract them a little bit, you know?

Good face, good hair, good look, mediocre comedy.

We'll see what happens.

Ooh, ooh, ooh!

Any comedy geniuses in here? I don't think.

Today is a new day, and I'm doing stand-up!

Whoo-hoo-hoo! Can't wait!

Oh, babes, how you doing?

All right, all right. How are you?

I'm still really annoyed at that order.

-It does no one any justice. -No.

And I thought, sleeping on it, oh, it would be better.

No, this one, I woke up more pissed.

I woke up fuming!

My God! Seriously.

But, like, I just hope

there is some good karma in this world,

and it fucks her over.

-So Tayce. -'Ello, 'ello.

So, like, you and A'Whora are just friends.

Yes. She's literally like a twin sister to me.

A very annoying sister.

-Well, yeah, I mean-- -Oi! [laughs]

I mean, prior to drag, we had a little...

but ever since drag, we've become besties.

Yeah.

I've only really dated one guy when I was 18,

and it was a shit show.

When I was 18 I was dating this guy,

and I went into it very quick.

I mean, we talked for about a week,

and he invited me up to Liverpool,

and I took two coaches all the way to Liverpool,

met this guy, absolutely gorgeous,

had beautiful food, you know, did the deed.

And I remember telling my best friend the next day,

and she was like, "You know, did you use protection?"

And I was like, "Fuck, no, I didn't, but it'll be fine."

And little did I know,

I didn't only have gonorrhea, I had chlamydia as well.

That just broke my trust in people,

and it changed me for a long time.

And I didn't really wanna talk to anyone

or let myself be hurt again.

It makes you look at yourself a little bit kind of--

It damages your self-esteem.

I kind of look at myself sometimes like, well, is it me?

What's wrong with me, you know?

Because I think I've just grown up--

you grow up around, you know--

you hear on the radio, every song is about love.

You know, you go out on a night out,

and everyone is going with everyone, you know.

Then you just look at yourself, like, well, you know,

is there something wrong with me?

Is there something on my face? Am I a horrible person?

So are you, like, self-conscious,

or, like, what--why is it?

Yeah, I have self-esteem issues like that.

Like, I don't look at myself

and think that I'm attractive, really.

I don't look at myself and think--

because at the end of the day, I feel like, well,

put two and two together.

If I was an attractive person,

why wouldn't I be with someone by now?

Yeah, I've come to a point

where I'm just used to being alone and being on my own.

It gives me a bit of a complex within myself.

Honestly, that is one of the only aspects of my life

that does really make me sad sometimes.

Like, I do have a great friendship group around me,

and I have a really supportive, great family,

and a great drag career going for me.

So I guess you can't really have

all good things at the same time.

I get it, you know.

I did not expect me and Tayce

to have this much in common.

We're both very self-conscious.

I'm the kind of fat, weird kid.

But clearly, you can be self-conscious

and be a supermodel.

But you shouldn't be-- please don't beat yourself up

over how you look, because you're the trade of the season.

You won a badge for it, you know?

At least you won that badge.

[all laugh]

Well, listen, I hope you find love after the show,

and also, for my sake, I find love after the show.

Oh, we will, honey.

-We'll do it together, right? -Yes, double dating.

We'll go to the drive-through and then go on the date.

Go on double dates. God.

[RuPaul laughs]

♪ Cover girl, put the bass in your walk ♪

♪ Head to toe, let your whole body talk ♪

And what?

Welcome to the main stage of RuPaul's Drag Race UK.

My funny girl, Michelle Visage.

Now, Michelle, have you ever been heckled?

Yes, and that's the last time I'll ever have a threesome.

[all laugh]

The super-spexy Alan Carr.

Alan, did you lick my girls into shape?

No, Ru. I didn't know that was an option.

[all laugh]

And the original queen of comedy,

the legend, Dawn French is here!

Dawn, now, what do you look for in a comedian?

Well, I guess I look for what everybody else does:

really pert buttocks.

[all laugh]

This week we challenged our queens

to make us laugh about love,

and tonight, category is Stoned On The Runway.

[chuckles]

Racers, start your engines,

and may the best drag queen win.

Almost live, tonight we bring you

some of the UK's most available acts.

And let me just say, London audiences

are the most exciting audiences in the world.

Please give yourselves a big round of applause.

If you're a fan of Michelle Visage,

let me hear you say "yeah!"

[silence]

Oh, dear. Wow.

First up, put your hands together for A'Whora.

[applause]

So let me introduce myself.

My name is A'Whora.

In fact, you can tell from my accent

I am, in fact, Northern.

There's a saying that goes about us Northerners,

and it is that we're young, we're dumb,

and I'm full of cum.

There's often the story about the birds and the bees,

and for many years I wondered

what the hell has a bird and a bee got to do with anything?

That was, in fact, until I tried anal,

and, boy, does that shit sting.

[all laugh] Whoo!

It's almost like running yourself a hot bath, you know?

You've gotta turn it on,

ease your way in.

Ugh!

Ahh...

Ooh!

Bastard, you!

But my--the most advice I ever received growing up

was from my nan.

You know, people always say

there's such a huge age gap

between the older and the younger generation,

and she's right.

But me and my nan found

that that gap was what really brought us together.

It was a real deep, wholesome connection.

We both had [bleep].

[all laugh] Wow.

[laughs]

Whew. [laughs]

Jeez Louise.

I mean, it was all [bleep] and giggles

until she giggled and [bleep], and then I'd go,

"Granddad, bring the hose!"

Pssssh!

Oh, dear.

Yeah, wow.

My nan was so dumb that--and--ugh.

My nan was so dumb that when--

Oh, God, I've lost--

-How dumb was she? -Yeah!

My nan was so dumb that when I would come home

and I'd say, "Nan, I'm off for a spit roast,"

and she said, "Girl, here's a tenner,

and bring me back a doggie bag."

[all laugh]

But eventually I knew I honestly had to come clean.

You know, there's only so many times

I could come home after a night out

with a waddle in my walk and a tampon up my ass.

[all laugh]

Oh, my God.

This is A'Whora's humor through and through.

But, yeah, maybe not for the BBC.

Remember where you are, girl.

Speaking of things coming,

this one you can't miss for a mile.

She may be tall, but her cock is small.

Ellie Diamond!

[laughter and applause]

Hello, hello, everyone.

Everyone give it up for A'Whora.

Wasn't she absolutely fabulous?

Yes!

Now, for those of you plastic dolls--

I'm speaking to you, Michelle--

for those who don't know me, my name is Ellie Diamond,

and that's spelled E-double-L-I-E D-I-A-M-O-N-D.

Emphasis on the D.

Now, I don't know about you, but I love the D.

I love doughnuts, dark chocolate,

double cheeseburgers

[deep voice] and dick.

Ellie Diamond just loves dick! [growls]

[all laugh]

[regular voice] Sorry.

I should probably mention

that I've got a bit of a dark side,

and her name's called Dirty Diamond.

I just don't know what came over me.

Speaking about coming over me,

I decided that I'd try to find myself a man.

But during the pandemic,

it's been so hard trying to get a date.

[deep voice] Hard! Hard just like my penis!

[all laugh]

[regular voice] For example, I set up this one date,

it was a perfect day,

I set up to walk on the beach, you know,

we were going for a stroll, getting some ice cream.

And when I asked if it was a good date,

the guy turned to me and said, "No!"

This other time, I set up, you know...

[all laugh]

This other time, I set up the most perfect night.

We had a movie prepared, there was candlelight,

there was champagne, and when I called the guy

to ask if he was still coming,

he just turned to me and said, "No!"

[all laugh] Okay.

Now, out of all my many years of dating,

relationships, and sexual experiences,

I keep getting told that you've got to kiss a thousand frogs.

[deep voice] And I've kissed and snubbed them all,

but I didn't catch any guy

or any frog with my massive tongue.

Lalalala, ribbit. Lalalala, ribbit.

Lalalala.

Ribbit, ribbit.

[all laugh]

Up next in the show, she puts the "Bon--"

[all laugh]

That was just the most mental thing

I've ever seen in my life.

What the fuck was going on?

She puts the "Bon" in Bon-Boulash.

Give it up for the absolutely dreadful Bimini!

[laughter and applause]

I must say, you all look so sexy tonight,

you make me wanna dismantle the patriarchy.

[all laugh]

I'm gonna talk to you tonight

about queer love, sex, and relationships.

I've been known to meet some emotional people in my time.

Top tip: never go cruising at a funeral.

[all laugh]

I have had some mediocre relationships in my time.

Not a joke, just a fact.

When I was about 14, I tried it on with a vicar.

I was too old apparently.

[all laugh]

That was the last time I ever went to Dibley.

[all laugh]

Talking of fetish, I was at a party once

and I saw a man dressed like a dog

drinking piss from a bowl.

It was really weird to see you there, Alan.

[all laugh]

Now, it is difficult being gorgeous.

Not a joke, just a fact.

I don't quite think the older generation

quite get us Millennials.

They think we're all sex, yoga, and brunch.

Now, I love getting pounded in downward dog

while deep throating an avocado.

That is, like, how I spend my Friday nights.

Joke's on them.

I had syphilis twice.

[all laugh]

Not a joke, just a fact.

[all laugh]

She is killing it.

Like, she's not giving anyone a chance to even breathe here.

Now, remember to love yourself,

because if you can't love yourself,

how the hell are we gonna overthrow the patriarchy?

Can I get a gay man up in here?

-Gay man! -Gay man!

Speaking of gay men, give it up

for Scotland's answer to birth control,

Lawrence Chaney!

[cheers and applause]

Thank you.

[applause]

How are we doing tonight, everyone?

[cheering]

No, that was fucking shite, right?

Start again. How you doing, everyone!

[cheering] Yes.

Now, how do you like my outfit?

-Gorg. -Good? Good?

Well, listen, I'd like to address the eleph--

well, the camel toe in the room.

Listen, it's not my fault

that my pussy's very large and in charge.

Chunky and spunky, yes.

My God. But here I am.

I'm here talking about love and relationships,

and I'm here in a big, poofy hairstyle,

and yes, "big and poofy" was my nickname in school.

[all laugh]

I am so, so unlucky when it comes to relationships,

and I told myself, I said, Lawrence,

don't bother coming out.

You know, don't bother coming out

until you've got a boyfriend,

until you've got something to say that you're gay

and a reason to say that you're gay.

And then it happened. Oh, God.

I had to come out because I got a boyfriend.

The fear was running inside me and out of me at the same time.

It was terrifying.

So I said to my mum, I said, "Okay, right.

Mum...don't know if you know this, but..."

[all laugh]

"I'm gay!"

And she said, "Son, we're all happy.

Chill out, it's fine, it's fine, it's fine."

She was so, so supportive.

And then I had to tell dad.

So I tried to get my sister to do it,

and my mum said, "No, Lawrence,

you need to tell your dad, you really do."

"You need to say it and get it out in the open

and feel confident and be happy."

All right, Lawrence, I think you're going around the houses

with all this one, babes.

When are we getting the punchlines?

Where's the jokes?

I said, "Okay, Mum, could you go and get Dad?

I'm really nervous, but I'll do it."

And she said,

"Nick! Your son wants to tell you he's gay!"

[all laugh]

Thank you so much for watching tonight.

I hope you had a fabulous time.

And please give it up for our next amazing act.

She's closing the show tonight.

Tonight she does not look like a steel-wool Teletubby.

Please give it up for Tayce!

[cheers and applause]

'Ello, 'ello, 'ello. How we doing? Are we good?

-Yeah. -I said, are we good?

-Yeah! -Yeah!

My name is Tayce.

Not Trase, Trace, Tarsey, Track and Trace,

Just Tayce. You got it?

-Yeah. -Amazing.

I'm sorry. I just have to clear that up real quick,

you know, because at the end of the day,

you learn to deal with the cards you're dealt

when your parents give you a name

from a book of made-up words.

[all laugh]

Now, honestly, I'm gonna level with you.

I've never been in love.

I've never found a boyfriend.

Me finding a boyfriend is just as difficult

as Ellie Diamond finding a RuPeter badge

in this competition.

Where is it, where is it?

I can't find it. I don't know where it is.

I'm so close, but I'm not.

[all laugh]

Now, we've all been on the apps,

you know, the good old dating apps.

The Grindr, the Tinder, the Hinge, the Scruff,

the Deliveroo live chat customer care.

Hey, I'll get it where I can.

A girl's got to eat, you know what I'm saying, Michelle?

Yes.

Honestly, my love life, it's been such a wreck.

I've never been in love,

unless we're talking about beans on toast. Whoa.

I tell you, there's something to be said about beans on toast.

It's a good comfort food, you know.

But you can't just have it straight out the tin.

You've gotta get, you know,

your butter, your ketchup, your beans.

-Your salt. -Yes.

Your pepper.

You stick it in the microwave,

and ding-dong, oh, my God,

you've got the most fabulous meal in the world.

It's amazing.

Oh, it just gets me going.

But you know, enough about that.

That is a story for another day.

When I think about romance...

well, I can't really think of anything.

The closest I've ever come to romance

is writing "I love you" to myself

in a bowl of Alphabetti Spaghetti.

But that's a story for another day.

[all laugh]

That's a story for another time.

That's a story for another time.

Tayce, babes, I think you need to tell that story now,

because I don't think there's gonna be another time.

Now, you know, I haven't really got

that much left to say to you guys right now,

because as I said,

my love life has been a big, fat pile of shit.

But if there's anything that I honestly can leave you with,

it's that if your love life

is going anywhere down the pipes like mine has,

just remember you can always get yourself

a bowl of Alphabetti Spaghetti

to tell yourself that you love yourself.

Thank you very much, and have a lovely good night.

[applause]

♪ Can you feel the love? ♪

Category is Stoned On The Runway.

Dripping in jewels.

First up, A'Whora.

Alan: This outfit's sick.

[RuPaul laughs]

A'Whora: I've got my drip stand dripping into me,

and I am oozing with jewels.

Dawn: Ooh. Ow. Ahh.

Free at last.

Not only am I dripping in diamonds,

but I am the diamond.

More sparkle than a unicorn's bum.

[all laugh]

RuPaul: Up next, Ellie D, Ellie Diamond.

She's got Yeti Davis eyes.

[all laugh]

Ellie: I've got crystals dripping from the hair,

crystals dripping from the ears,

from the neck, from the chest,

and I'm really, really just feeling all the icy vibes.

You know what they say about queens who wear white?

-No, what? -They're whores!

[all laugh]

I have diamonds in my name, so with this runway

I'm giving you Ellie Diamond at her finest.

She's going back to the Yeti Ford Clinic.

[all laugh]

Up next, Bimini Bon-Boulash.

Michelle: Eew.

Alan: What can I say. She's a zit girl.

Bimini: I am serving you high-fashion, spotty realness.

I've got me greasy Shirley from EastEnders hair.

Michelle: Ow!

Guys, your pus-sy's on fire.

[all laugh]

I'm method acting.

I'm popping these zits on me face.

I'm giving you Bimini's version

of being stoned on the runway.

Spot on.

[all laugh]

RuPaul: Up next, Lawrence Chaney.

She came from Uranus!

Lawrence: I am serving you Doctor Who monster B-movie

alien-level chicness from outer space.

Two in the pink?

One in the stink. [all laugh]

I've got crystals coming out my shoulders,

I've got crystals on my minge.

Beam me up, Slutty!

Less Tiffany, more tit-fanny.

[all laugh]

RuPaul: Up next, Tayce.

Michelle: Diamonique!

Tayce: I am serving the judges

ethereal Mugler robotic armor realness.

Ooh!

Ooh, tease!

Alan: She's touching her crown jewels.

Strutting the runway, my stones are drip-drop, drip-drop,

little April shower, honey, and you can't take it.

Oh, she can drive up my jewel carriage gate.

-Ooh. -[laughs]

♪ Can you feel the love? ♪

Welcome, ladies.

It's time for the judges' critiques.

Let's start with A'Whora.

So in your stand-up comedy,

somehow we went from anal to your nan

in a very quick matter of time.

This is still the BBC.

I think a lot will be cut out.

But I don't think it always needs to be in the gutter.

Because I think you do have more than just that--

pun intended--in you.

[all laugh] Sorry, sorry.

Do you know what? Let's talk about the positives.

You've got great physical comedy,

but I just thought it was undermined a bit

by the rude jokes.

But you came out first,

and you came out with confidence.

Because do you know what?

As a stand-up comic, no one wants to go out first.

Who chose the lineup? Was it you, Ellie?

-Yeah. -Okay.

Shady bitch. [all laugh]

No. That's how you play the game, right?

Thank you.

Well done for coming out

with so much attitude at the beginning.

And thank you for being more revolting

than a revolting thing.

[all laugh]

Like, not gonna lie. Stand-up comedy is not my forte.

But, like, me and my nan are, like, so vulgar.

She raised me for, like, five years.

She's very much like the Catherine Tate nan.

[chuckles]

Tonight on the runway, absolutely stunning.

The hair is kind of a nod to a RuPaul hairstyle.

-Yeah. -Yes, got it.

Sexy, elegant. I love your bejeweled drip.

Here you are, looking vajazzled up the wazoo,

and you are a treat for the eyes.

Thank you.

All right, let's move on to Ellie Diamond. Ellie D.

You had some funny moments in your stand-up, too,

but it started to peter out toward the end.

I don't know why I found it funny, but I just did.

Did you find that bit surreal?

[deep voice] The "No?"

Anyway, I did.

I think I understand what happened with that,

is that a joke like that, when you drop out of character

into something else is very effective,

but it needs a rhythm, and you need

to then have the punchline properly to land it at the end.

And sadly, I don't think that quite happened.

But, listen, I love this outfit.

You're like a beautiful snow queen.

Got stones in your hair, on your outfit,

on your nails, on your boots.

It looks beautiful. I can't fault this.

You look amazing. I'd quite like to lick you.

You're more than welcome to after the show, yes.

Bimini Bon-Boulash.

I can't see-- there's some actress

that you look like, and I can't--

Meryl Streep?

[all laugh]

That's it!

-I thought so. -Bingo!

I loved your stand-up.

The synergy with your material and your persona as you came on,

you were like a femme fatale, you were brittle.

You looked like you'd just come from your husband's funeral.

You were just there, right, I'm gonna tell you something.

And when you felt confident, we felt confident.

"Not a joke, just a fact." I really like that.

You could build a whole routine around that.

You had filthy humor, but you layered it with storytelling

and not-filthy humor, and that's magical.

Tonight on the runway, I've never seen anybody up here

in an outfit made of acne or a rash.

You push boundaries,

and that to me is what drag is all about.

You know, you never go Route 1,

and that's what I love about this.

This is totally unique, totally you.

What a week you've had.

This is brave, and I really applaud you for that.

Thank you.

I've honestly grown up watching you so much,

and, like, always been in my house.

So that's honestly the most amazing thing.

-Thank you. -Oh, you're very welcome.

Good night for you, Bimini.

-Thank you. -That look is amazing.

Just three words of advice:

deep pore cleanser.

[all laugh]

I'll try it.

Up next, Lawrence Chaney.

Greetings!

[laughs]

So in your stand-up, you looked absolutely beautiful.

The punchlines were good.

I loved the big camel-toe vagina jokes,

because all of our eyes were looking at it anyway.

-Yeah. -So my issue,

that it just took a little bit long in the setup.

Right.

Admittedly, you had to get a megabus

to get to the punchline it took so long.

But you know, it was self-deprecating and everything,

and those coming-out stories,

I never get bored of hearing them.

You are the most natural comic on the stage here tonight,

without a doubt.

Something about you

is very easy to connect with,

and that is a rare, rare thing.

So also is being beautiful and funny at the same time.

[all laugh]

You look amazing.

This pink is giving me complete life.

The shape of you is delicious.

It looks like you've gone, "I'm gonna push it."

You look a bit like a hemorrhoid,

but you're gonna push it.

And it's different than anything you've done before,

and I like that, especially at this point in this competition.

Thank you.

Up next, Tayce.

Tayce, in your stand-up comedy,

I thought you were gonna freakin' suck.

And, Tayce, you didn't.

Totally related to the Deliveroo chat.

I was so impressed today, I was,

because I know how nervous you were when we did our rehearsal,

but I did find you funny.

The way you were going, "Well, that's another story,"

and I'm like, wait a minute.

You haven't finished that one or given me a punchline.

Would you headline The Comedy Store?

Probably not.

But I know what you were going through in rehearsal,

so you should be proud of yourself.

I don't know what happened,

but my mind just went completely blank.

-Well, it happens. -And I got to the end,

and the minute I was walking offstage,

I was like, I feel like I just did, like, 20 seconds.

You may have felt that you were flailing around inside that,

but you were climbing a great, big mountain.

So be proud for that.

It felt like you were rushing through it,

and that you didn't make eye contact with us.

We want you to look us in the eyes

and say, "Hey, hi, here I am. Who are you?"

Tonight on the runway,

honestly, breathtakingly beautiful.

Loving this Barbarella space vixen look.

You're like a sort of ethereal animal.

I know that sounds like an odd thing to say,

but you are beauty, you are.

Thank you so much.

Thank you, Tayce.

Thank you, ladies.

While you go backstage and untuck,

the judges and I will deliberate.

You may leave the stage.

Another runway done, ladies.

My feet are killing me.

Same.

After that bad critique, I am raging.

Well, that was fascinating, wasn't it?

That was very interesting.

It's almost shocking to see that she would do this in the lineup.

Ellie Diamond plays off this sweetheart, cartoon,

child's play, little anime girl,

and now she's literally the devil.

I don't even wanna look at you, Ellie.

Like, I genuinely don't.

Like, I've not even really looked at you the whole time

this whole day because I just can't.

I can't even--honestly, I can't stand you right now.

Like, I want to cry,

not because I'm upset, because I'm so fucking angry.

Like, it's actually a joke.

Like, I just feel so disappointed in you.

I mean, like, I get that, and, like, when we're--

like, I even said to Tayce

like we were sitting together, like, I felt horrible after,

like, hearing what you and Lawrence had said

about the way that, like, I had put that thing together.

Eh, I don't know how much I believe that, though.

Because you can't really sit there

and be, like, "I felt horrible."

You wanted to go after her

because you thought she was gonna go down

like a sack of shit.

So did we all, because we've all underestimated her.

So you could have still got that and put me on first,

put Bim last, but you didn't.

You tried to set me up--

But then knowing that you're a really good comedian--

No, you tried to set everyone up.

You tried to set every single person up.

Lawrence and A'Whora are very, very deeply offended

and taking it to heart.

But they just need to, like, take a deep breath

and get over it, because it's Drag Race.

It's a race to the end, baby, and only one of us can win.

So, you know, if someone's gonna, you know,

chuck a marble underneath you and you trip and fall,

well, then you should have looked at the floor.

Don't sit there and be, like, "Oh, I was tearing myself up."

I wasn't seeing someone torn up.

That genuinely is how I felt.

Like, it's down to the nitty gritty.

And, yeah, I don't have a badge yet,

so then having that power to do that, yeah, I did do that.

Like, this is a game.

This is a game.

If you had a position that I was in,

and you were worried because you didn't have any badges,

I'm sure you would do the same things I did.

It is a competition, but, like, I would not have tried to think,

okay, I'm gonna make myself shine

by doing dirty on every single person in this competition.

I'm gonna give them the worst opportunity they can have

so that they can fuck up

and I might stand a chance of looking good.

That's your own insecurity, period.

But, like, the judges didn't say that the show was bad.

If anything, they thought it was good.

And even Ru herself was, like,

"You put these queens in order?" And I was like, "Yeah."

And she was, like, "Shady bitch, but you're playing the game."

She knew immediately.

She knew there was shade afoot

with that running order. She knew.

Is there a problem with that, though?

Lawrence is angry,

but it seems to go deeper than just this challenge.

I get this kind of weird,

older/younger sister vibe from them,

even though there's only two years apart.

You didn't even care that putting me after Bimini

could be a huge risk and I could have gone home.

I could have gone home?

I'm really hurt by it, actually.

Really hurt.

Me and Ellie are meant to be friends and sisters,

and now she's pitting one against someone else?

No.

Sorry. I'm very annoyed.

All right, now just between us squirrel friends,

what do you think?

Starting with A'Whora.

A'Whora looked absolutely stunning,

both tonight on the runway and in her stand-up comedy.

But I think she went for low-hanging fruit.

It was a left, a right, an uppercut, a jab,

all with anal and cum and dick jokes.

Yeah, who knew "I'm young, dumb, and full of cum"

would have been the light relief in her act?

[all laugh]

It's really the kind of comedy

you do in your apartment for your friends.

Michelle and I were laughing not because it was funny,

but because it was just so vulgar.

Yes.

Up next, Ellie Diamond.

Tonight on the runway was my least favorite look.

Though she looked beautiful,

it paled in creativity compared to every single other queen.

I think the potential in her is huge.

Ellie wasn't as blue as A'Whora.

Yeah.

So does she get points for not being blue?

She does get some points,

because she did another character as well.

Coming out of A'Whora, anybody was gonna look like a nun.

[all laugh]

So she definitely was blue.

She was baby blue.

[all laugh]

-Bimini. -Oh, I loved Bimini.

She was poised, she was in control.

The moment she came on that stage,

I thought, right, I'm gonna be entertained here.

What she did, had the wink-wink, nudge-nudge,

and then she went on to something clean.

Really, there's somebody with a lot of sass there,

and with a kind of eloquence.

Tonight on the runway, she was so different from anybody else.

At every turn, she has done the unexpected.

Not a joke, just a fact.

That's right. I love that.

All right, let's move on to Lawrence Chaney.

In that comedy challenge,

Lawrence has the same comfort that Bimini has.

Lawrence actually has more comfort.

I just thought it took way too long to get to the punchline.

That was him growing in confidence,

so I'm gonna forgive him.

But his stand-up routine,

it was warm, it was charming, it was self-deprecating.

It's not often that you immediately warm to somebody,

and that's exactly what happened between me and Lawrence tonight.

You know, it's interesting you picked up on that.

His ability to be vulnerable, which is his strength,

and that is such a hard lesson to teach people.

And for his runway look,

we got another dose of Lawrence Chaney humor,

when he came out as a big, pink, gay, crusty meteorite.

[all laugh]

All right, let's move on to Tayce.

Tonight on the runway, good Lord, that was beautiful.

And in her stand-up comedy,

she didn't suck, she just was insecure.

You know, but she kept saying repeatedly,

"Oh, I'll tell you about that at another time."

-Right. -And we were like,

"No, you should probably tell us now."

[all laugh]

Because your routine's getting cut short,

and you're flailing.

This next gig's gonna be absolutely amazing,

because that's where all the good shit is.

Dawn, at what point did you find your right rhythm as a comic?

Let's face it.

I do know people who've been in comedy for 40 years

and still can't do stand-up.

[cough, cough] Jennifer Saunders.

[all laugh]

But, you know, it's easier for some than others.

Let's put it that way.

All right, silence,

I've made my decision.

Bring back my girls.

Welcome back, ladies.

I've made some decisions.

Lawrence.

Tonight your funny side really came out.

Bimini.

Your stand-up went deep.

Not a joke, just a fact.

Bimini, con-drag-ulations.

You're the winner of this week's challenge.

[applause]

And you've won a coveted RuPeter badge.

♪ Rule Britannia ♪

Wear it with pride.

Thank you so much. [applause]

Honestly, getting to this point in the competition,

these incredible people.

I lip synced the first week, and I have worked my ass off

to get to this point.

And to get here with three badges now,

it just means everything.

So thank you so much.

-It's amazing. -Thank you.

Amazing the work you've done.

Thank you very much.

Lawrence, you're safe.

Thank you so much.

Ladies, you may step to the back of the stage.

-Thank you. -Thank you.

Well done.

Ellie Diamond.

On the runway, you shine bright,

but your stand-up act needed more polish.

You are safe.

You may join the other girls.

Thank you.

A'Whora, Tayce, I'm sorry, my dears,

but you are up for elimination.

I can't even look at Tayce right now.

Like, I just know I need to go into this and fight for myself

and put aside the fact that we are best friends.

I love you, bitch.

I love you, too.

Two queens stand before me.

Ladies, this is your last chance to impress me

and save yourself from elimination.

The time has come... [thunder]

for you to lip sync...

[echoing] for your life.

She's like a sister to me, you know?

This is gonna be hard.

Good luck, and don't fuck it up.

[music plays]

♪ When I said I needed you ♪

♪ You said you would always stay ♪

♪ It wasn't me who changed, but you ♪

♪ And now you've gone away ♪

♪ Don't you see that now you've gone ♪

♪ And I'm left here on my own ♪

♪ That I have to follow you ♪

♪ And beg you to come home ♪

♪ You don't have to say you love me ♪

♪ Just be close at hand ♪

♪ You don't have to stay forever ♪

♪ I will understand ♪

♪ Believe me ♪

♪ Believe me ♪

♪ You don't have to say you love me ♪

♪ Just be close at hand ♪

♪ You don't have to stay forever ♪

♪ I will understand ♪

♪ Believe me ♪

♪ Believe me ♪

♪ Believe me ♪

Wow!

[cheers and applause]

Ladies, I've made my decision.

Tayce, shantay you stay.

Thank you.

You may join the other girls.

My dear A'Whora,

you're leaving a hole in this competition,

a huge hole.

Now sashay away.

Thank you all so much for this opportunity.

Thank you.

-Love you. -Love you.

In a world full of hos,

be A'Whora.

[laughter and applause]

-We love you, baby! -Love you, A'Whora!

I'm feeling really proud of myself.

At the end of the day,

I left with two wins and only one lip sync.

So I did my best, and that's all I can do.

This may be the end,

but I'm sure you'll see me next on the cover of Vogue.

Con-drag-ulations, ladies.

And remember, if you can't love yourself,

how in the hell you gonna love somebody else?

Can I get an "amen" up in here?

-Amen! -Amen!

All right. Now let the music play!

♪ To, to, to, to the moon ♪

♪ To the moon ♪

♪ To the moon ♪

♪ Come on and take me away ♪

♪ To, to, to, to the moon ♪

RuPaul: Next time on RuPaul's Drag Race UK...

You'll be in the new BBC drag drama BeastEnders.

-Hey, queens! -It's Natalie Cassidy!

Oh, bubblies in the fridge!

Ooh. Okay, cut. Cut, cut, cut, cut.

Don't you even read your bloomin' script?

You were like a kind of late summer fly

by the time you were getting off the stage.

You were probably the best actress.

It didn't get you a badge, though.

Was it worth it?

Hen, shut it!