Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:36,520 --> 00:00:37,733
I'm sinking
2
00:00:44,109 --> 00:00:46,126
Maybe we should up your dosage a bit.
3
00:00:47,057 --> 00:00:51,410
200 milligrams is the maximum dosage
for Sertraline, perhaps we should try you on that.
4
00:00:52,666 --> 00:00:57,681
Or, maybe we could try a different type
of antidepressants if SSRI's aren't working for you.
5
00:01:00,000 --> 00:01:03,510
You should start feeling the therapeutic effects
soon.
6
00:03:43,501 --> 00:03:45,031
Why're you being so quiet?
7
00:03:45,941 --> 00:03:48,000
I'm just... chilling.
8
00:03:49,041 --> 00:03:50,242
Yeah, so how've you been?
9
00:03:50,532 --> 00:03:51,370
Fine...
10
00:03:51,757 --> 00:03:53,394
Come on man,
11
00:03:53,974 --> 00:03:55,489
it's been fucking ages, let's catch up!
12
00:03:56,842 --> 00:03:58,165
What've you been up to--
13
00:03:59,758 --> 00:04:00,258
working?
14
00:04:00,258 --> 00:04:02,546
Yeah, yeah - on my writing.
15
00:04:02,546 --> 00:04:08,078
Shit! Are you still doing that?
I thought you'd have grown out of it by now.
16
00:04:08,078 --> 00:04:08,658
What?
17
00:04:09,576 --> 00:04:11,215
Have you got anything published yet?
18
00:04:11,215 --> 00:04:13,525
No... but you don't--
19
00:04:13,525 --> 00:04:17,912
Still the same old Huey man, so easy to wind up!
20
00:04:20,521 --> 00:04:23,067
Yeah, so err, what's the story about?
21
00:04:23,453 --> 00:04:25,676
Feel like spilling the beans to me, eh?
22
00:04:25,676 --> 00:04:26,498
No.
23
00:04:26,836 --> 00:04:27,764
No?!
24
00:04:29,808 --> 00:04:33,301
It's just... a novel.
25
00:04:33,832 --> 00:04:35,590
Oi, he's been writing a novel you know!
26
00:04:35,590 --> 00:04:36,564
Stop!
27
00:04:36,564 --> 00:04:37,257
[laughing] Why?
28
00:04:38,755 --> 00:04:41,045
You should be more excited about it,
promoting it and shit.
29
00:04:41,045 --> 00:04:42,269
It's not finished yet...
30
00:04:42,269 --> 00:04:43,542
How far have you got?
31
00:04:44,170 --> 00:04:45,847
Seventy thousand words.
32
00:04:46,466 --> 00:04:47,810
Fuck me!
33
00:04:48,682 --> 00:04:50,614
That's like what? Seven dissertations or something?
34
00:04:50,614 --> 00:04:51,549
Yeah... so?
35
00:04:54,833 --> 00:04:56,748
So maybe I should take a leaf out of your book.
36
00:04:58,294 --> 00:05:00,793
I mean, you're a bloody genius man.
37
00:05:01,324 --> 00:05:04,121
The next -- the next Rudyard Kipling!
38
00:05:04,121 --> 00:05:04,798
What?
39
00:05:05,280 --> 00:05:07,038
That guy that wrote the jungle book -
I thought you'd known that.
40
00:05:07,038 --> 00:05:08,842
I do know that, I just didn't expect you to--
41
00:05:12,031 --> 00:05:15,704
All right, so uh, what's your story about then Rudyard?
42
00:05:15,704 --> 00:05:16,988
Don't call me that.
43
00:05:16,988 --> 00:05:19,835
Come on--
stop it--
come on man tell me.
44
00:05:19,835 --> 00:05:21,162
I'm not in the mood.
45
00:05:21,162 --> 00:05:21,990
Why not?
46
00:05:24,212 --> 00:05:27,869
If you can't talk to an old buddy about it - right - who are you're going to talk to about it the eh?
47
00:05:27,869 --> 00:05:28,449
No-one.
48
00:05:29,415 --> 00:05:33,213
Man, why don't you just let me read it.
I can help you man, you seem stressed.
49
00:05:33,213 --> 00:05:34,150
No.
50
00:05:35,725 --> 00:05:37,382
I'm offering you an olive branch here mate.
51
00:05:37,382 --> 00:05:38,107
It's fine.
52
00:05:40,860 --> 00:05:41,991
Nah,
53
00:05:43,730 --> 00:05:48,203
Now I'm going to come around mate you still
live by that pub the Angelic, yeah?
54
00:05:49,701 --> 00:05:56,399
Yeah, yeah so I'll come around buddy help you write your novel,
alright. It's the least I can do.
55
00:05:56,399 --> 00:05:58,060
What do you mean the least you can do?
56
00:05:59,171 --> 00:06:00,840
I need a place to stay.
57
00:06:04,067 --> 00:06:05,360
Guess what man.
58
00:06:05,360 --> 00:06:06,150
What?
59
00:06:06,150 --> 00:06:08,603
I know someone who's got
a crush on you.
60
00:06:10,000 --> 00:06:11,563
What are you talking about?
61
00:06:11,805 --> 00:06:13,511
She's over there.
62
00:06:15,492 --> 00:06:16,185
Jess.
63
00:06:17,489 --> 00:06:18,962
She's always had a thing for you you know.
64
00:06:20,267 --> 00:06:23,344
It's true - you should go for it.
I'll back you up - be your wingman, alright!
65
00:06:23,344 --> 00:06:24,242
Yo Jess--
66
00:06:24,242 --> 00:06:24,918
Shut up!
67
00:06:24,918 --> 00:06:29,206
Look under the table, Huey's got a massive stiffy for you right now!
68
00:06:29,206 --> 00:06:31,010
Shut the fuck up!
-- Why are you being such a dick!
69
00:06:31,446 --> 00:06:33,771
Oh, I'm just trying to help you out man, come on!
70
00:06:34,351 --> 00:06:36,541
Stop bullying him.
71
00:06:36,541 --> 00:06:37,572
I'm not bullying him!
72
00:06:37,572 --> 00:06:38,316
Yeah you are!
73
00:06:38,316 --> 00:06:40,026
No one is bullying me
-- See!
74
00:07:11,524 --> 00:07:13,306
So what is it you do again?
75
00:07:13,306 --> 00:07:14,481
In your bio it said--
76
00:07:14,481 --> 00:07:15,623
I didn't put it in there,
77
00:07:15,623 --> 00:07:16,708
Did you not?
-- No.
78
00:07:16,949 --> 00:07:19,894
Oh, so what is it that you do then?
79
00:07:19,894 --> 00:07:20,923
I'm um...
80
00:07:25,560 --> 00:07:27,498
You know what, it-it doesn't matter...
81
00:07:28,416 --> 00:07:30,329
Uh, okay...
82
00:07:32,626 --> 00:07:34,011
Did you have a nice day today?
83
00:07:34,639 --> 00:07:35,544
Not really.
84
00:07:35,544 --> 00:07:36,269
How come?
85
00:07:37,573 --> 00:07:39,564
I've slept most of it away.
86
00:07:39,564 --> 00:07:40,983
Oh, that sounds so nice.
87
00:07:40,983 --> 00:07:42,376
It's not, it's exhausting.
88
00:07:42,762 --> 00:07:44,211
It's exhausting sleeping all day?
89
00:07:44,211 --> 00:07:46,576
I don't really want to, I just can't stay awake.
90
00:07:46,576 --> 00:07:47,851
Why's that?
91
00:07:47,851 --> 00:07:49,709
Medication.
92
00:07:49,709 --> 00:07:51,308
Are you ill?
93
00:07:52,758 --> 00:07:54,057
I don't know...
94
00:07:55,263 --> 00:07:59,364
Well, if you're taking antibiotics, you should try some probiotics. It's much better for your stomach.
95
00:07:59,364 --> 00:08:01,308
I'll take your word for it.
96
00:08:15,125 --> 00:08:17,281
What's the dumbest thing you've ever done?
97
00:08:17,281 --> 00:08:17,909
What?
98
00:08:17,909 --> 00:08:19,894
The stupidest thing - what was it?
99
00:08:20,329 --> 00:08:23,090
Um, every day of my life.
100
00:08:23,090 --> 00:08:25,378
No-no, seriously the dumbest
thing - what was it?
101
00:08:25,861 --> 00:08:29,409
I-I don't really know off the top of my head...
102
00:08:31,293 --> 00:08:32,414
How come you're single?
103
00:08:32,945 --> 00:08:36,258
Oh, um, reasons...
104
00:08:36,811 --> 00:08:40,000
I mean, how much do you really wanna know?
105
00:08:40,000 --> 00:08:41,225
Everything.
106
00:08:41,225 --> 00:08:42,119
Oh, you'll get bored...
107
00:08:42,119 --> 00:08:43,395
I'm not, I'm interested.
108
00:08:44,292 --> 00:08:49,990
Alright, so basically like, I was dating this guy for two
years and it was all getting a bit intense so I decided
109
00:08:49,990 --> 00:08:55,710
to do some volunteering in the Amazon, you
know, like South America. Honestly it was such
110
00:08:55,710 --> 00:09:00,000
a good experience, like the place is so beautiful,
honestly, I wish I could go back tomorrow and
111
00:09:00,000 --> 00:09:01,166
do all over again.
112
00:09:01,593 --> 00:09:04,804
But basically, me and my ex were
doing long distance while I was out there--
113
00:09:05,094 --> 00:09:06,979
How long were you volunteering for?
114
00:09:07,269 --> 00:09:08,756
Two years...
115
00:09:09,191 --> 00:09:12,377
So yeah, the volunteering went on for a while.
116
00:09:12,570 --> 00:09:16,500
So, I told my ex it'll be alright
for us to be in an open relationship.
117
00:09:16,500 --> 00:09:20,520
Like, he wasn't really cool with it but when I told
him that once I got back to London we'd get
118
00:09:20,520 --> 00:09:22,063
back together he agreed.
119
00:09:22,401 --> 00:09:23,365
And did you?
120
00:09:23,365 --> 00:09:24,138
Did I?
121
00:09:24,138 --> 00:09:26,161
Get back together when you got back?
122
00:09:26,692 --> 00:09:33,841
Uh, well, no, because by then it'd been so long besides...
being in an open relationship for so long
it's acting really awkward around me.
123
00:09:37,174 --> 00:09:38,783
How many people did you sleep with?
124
00:09:42,165 --> 00:09:43,536
What about him?
125
00:09:46,743 --> 00:09:48,206
So it was pretty uneven then.
126
00:09:48,206 --> 00:09:49,654
You could say that...
127
00:09:50,000 --> 00:09:51,447
Like, I'm not a slut or anything.
128
00:09:51,447 --> 00:09:52,623
I didn't say you were.
129
00:09:52,623 --> 00:09:54,361
It like, it didn't mean anything so it really doesn't count.
130
00:09:54,361 --> 00:09:55,638
I'm not judging.
131
00:09:57,764 --> 00:10:03,682
Honestly we've just grown apart emotionally to,
like those two years changed me and he
132
00:10:03,682 --> 00:10:05,688
was just the same -- it was kind of underwhelming.
133
00:10:07,089 --> 00:10:10,711
I do feel kind of bad though... I think he
still thinks we're dating.
134
00:10:10,711 --> 00:10:12,693
I mean I did promise but still.
135
00:10:16,138 --> 00:10:19,879
All right, yeah, so that's the story.
136
00:10:19,879 --> 00:10:21,876
I bet you regret asking me now.
137
00:10:23,708 --> 00:10:24,864
Not really
138
00:10:27,090 --> 00:10:28,216
For one thing...
139
00:10:30,000 --> 00:10:31,487
if he still thinks you're dating,
140
00:10:32,695 --> 00:10:34,534
why haven't you just broken it off with him?
141
00:10:34,534 --> 00:10:36,696
Because, it's awkward.
142
00:10:36,696 --> 00:10:39,591
He was such a big part
of my life and I promised him, so it's like...
143
00:10:39,591 --> 00:10:41,070
it's tricky
144
00:10:43,050 --> 00:10:44,928
So how come you're on the dating apps?
145
00:10:45,943 --> 00:10:47,066
To see what else is out there.
146
00:10:47,066 --> 00:10:48,224
Because to me you're
147
00:10:48,224 --> 00:10:52,389
saying you're hesitant but it sounds like
you've made up your mind about him already.
148
00:10:53,260 --> 00:10:53,900
Maybe...
149
00:10:53,900 --> 00:10:56,124
And you've both been sleeping around
on each other.
150
00:10:56,124 --> 00:10:58,595
Well we both agreed to be in an open relationship.
151
00:10:58,595 --> 00:11:00,940
I'm not judging. You're an individual,
you're going to do whatever
152
00:11:00,940 --> 00:11:04,520
the hell you want and considering how lame
he sounds, I can't say it blame you, but you
153
00:11:04,520 --> 00:11:05,605
should probably cut him loose.
154
00:11:05,605 --> 00:11:06,953
He's not lame, he's just--
155
00:11:06,953 --> 00:11:08,374
I guess what I'm saying is--
156
00:11:10,500 --> 00:11:12,088
Do you want to keep playing it safe?
157
00:11:12,620 --> 00:11:15,733
Or do you want to jump with both feet
and see what's out there.
158
00:11:16,361 --> 00:11:20,892
I mean, I guess you're right
but it's hard.
159
00:11:29,481 --> 00:11:30,786
Do you want to come back to mine?
160
00:11:30,786 --> 00:11:31,286
What?
161
00:11:31,286 --> 00:11:31,986
You know...
162
00:11:32,566 --> 00:11:33,476
get laid.
163
00:11:34,347 --> 00:11:37,730
I mean you can't just
say something like that out of nowhere!
164
00:11:37,730 --> 00:11:38,715
It'll be fun.
165
00:12:28,452 --> 00:12:32,880
We can do other things.
166
00:12:32,880 --> 00:12:35,548
No, it's fine, I've got this -- I just
167
00:12:37,577 --> 00:12:44,219
--just-just give me a minute -- I just-just go
with it okay! It's fine, just--
168
00:14:00,000 --> 00:14:01,374
Have you ever read the story of Job?
169
00:14:02,678 --> 00:14:03,634
No...?
170
00:14:05,228 --> 00:14:06,396
It's from the bible.
171
00:14:07,845 --> 00:14:08,642
Okay...?
172
00:14:11,203 --> 00:14:14,908
You never -- you don't know what it's about?
173
00:14:14,908 --> 00:14:16,003
No.
174
00:14:19,126 --> 00:14:20,653
It's from the old testament.
175
00:14:21,668 --> 00:14:27,756
Job is a wealthy man, in a large family
flocks of sheep, a well-tended
176
00:14:27,756 --> 00:14:31,422
farmland. He committed no sin.
177
00:14:31,422 --> 00:14:35,566
He was a moral and righteous
man who praised god in all his glory.
178
00:14:36,485 --> 00:14:41,740
God boasts to Satan about Job's goodness
but Satan argues that God had granted Job
179
00:14:41,740 --> 00:14:48,990
a blessed life so no wonder he was so devout.
You know what god did?
180
00:14:48,990 --> 00:14:58,560
He let Satan torment the poor fucker just
to prove a point just to prove that Job wouldn't
181
00:14:58,560 --> 00:15:00,780
turn his back on God and his glory.
182
00:15:03,389 --> 00:15:09,028
He killed Job's family, killed Job's animals,
he ravaged Job's skin with painful sores.
183
00:15:10,000 --> 00:15:16,275
Job's friends told him, he should pray to god
because he must have sinned.
184
00:15:18,443 --> 00:15:28,458
You know what I would have done if I were
Job? would have made everyone around me suffer
185
00:15:36,430 --> 00:15:41,228
Huey, these big sweeping statements that you've
been making recently, it's making me--
186
00:15:41,228 --> 00:15:43,046
I'm just getting into the headspace
187
00:15:44,689 --> 00:15:45,575
Of?
188
00:15:46,042 --> 00:15:47,819
It's just acting.
189
00:15:49,516 --> 00:15:50,888
My character.
190
00:15:52,726 --> 00:15:54,246
That's what this all
191
00:15:55,647 --> 00:15:59,267
That's--
That's - what?
192
00:16:01,730 --> 00:16:08,130
If I can't get into my character's head, how
am I supposed to express him? I have to imbibe
193
00:16:08,130 --> 00:16:12,126
him - live in his shoes. That's the only way
that I can express myself.
194
00:16:13,575 --> 00:16:16,000
Express - yourself?
195
00:16:21,600 --> 00:16:24,396
Huey are you helping to sell your story?
196
00:16:25,604 --> 00:16:28,182
I know you don't have to worry about the money, however--
197
00:16:28,182 --> 00:16:31,294
That's not the- that's not the point.
198
00:16:32,744 --> 00:16:35,250
I just need to write this story.
199
00:16:35,540 --> 00:16:41,504
Why you need to write this particular story?
Couldn't you write about something happier--
200
00:16:41,504 --> 00:16:45,584
Because I want to write this -- it's meaningful to me.
201
00:16:47,033 --> 00:16:49,250
Meaningful in what way?
202
00:16:53,460 --> 00:16:58,029
Huey, have you been having the
urge to harm yourself?
203
00:16:58,930 --> 00:17:00,562
To harm others?
204
00:19:05,581 --> 00:19:06,964
Hey Lucy!
205
00:19:06,964 --> 00:19:10,522
Hey! This is a nice surprise.
206
00:19:11,053 --> 00:19:11,983
Yeah.
207
00:19:11,983 --> 00:19:13,104
Didn't realise you were back in London.
208
00:19:13,104 --> 00:19:16,517
Yeah, I, uh, I only just got back from Austria.
209
00:19:18,353 --> 00:19:20,558
I will give you a text--
210
00:19:20,558 --> 00:19:21,669
Sure!
211
00:19:21,669 --> 00:19:22,903
See ya.
212
00:26:48,897 --> 00:26:50,000
Hi.
213
00:27:02,330 --> 00:27:03,453
I'm Huey.
214
00:27:06,207 --> 00:27:07,867
What's your name?
215
00:27:10,814 --> 00:27:12,000
Lucy.
216
00:27:13,187 --> 00:27:14,220
Hi Lucy.
217
00:27:16,248 --> 00:27:17,224
What do you want?
218
00:27:18,867 --> 00:27:20,865
That's Murakami right?
219
00:27:21,910 --> 00:27:22,623
Yeah...
220
00:27:22,623 --> 00:27:23,680
I love his books.
221
00:27:24,646 --> 00:27:28,125
Cool, that's nice, I guess...
222
00:27:28,429 --> 00:27:30,856
Norwegian wood is actually my
favourite of his.
223
00:27:31,919 --> 00:27:32,836
Right...
224
00:27:33,584 --> 00:27:34,738
What's yours?
225
00:27:35,501 --> 00:27:37,200
It's the first book of his I've read.
226
00:27:37,826 --> 00:27:38,774
Do you like it
227
00:27:41,721 --> 00:27:42,733
I guess...
228
00:27:42,733 --> 00:27:45,251
Because I couldn't get into IQ84.
229
00:27:46,509 --> 00:27:47,785
Okay...
230
00:27:51,408 --> 00:27:54,042
What else do you enjoy reading?
231
00:27:57,440 --> 00:27:58,042
Nothing.
232
00:27:58,477 --> 00:28:04,419
I don't get much time to read myself
I'm too busy writing at the moment -- too busy
233
00:28:04,419 --> 00:28:08,374
to read that is... It's a Catch-22.
234
00:28:09,678 --> 00:28:12,223
So what do you do?
235
00:28:12,755 --> 00:28:14,209
I'm a layabout.
236
00:28:16,045 --> 00:28:18,490
Oh no, seriously
what do you get up to?
237
00:28:20,353 --> 00:28:25,181
Listen, I'm not interested in whatever this is.
238
00:28:25,181 --> 00:28:27,328
It's just friendly conversation.
239
00:28:28,459 --> 00:28:31,451
I have enough friends - thanks though!
240
00:28:32,948 --> 00:28:34,885
You could always have more.
241
00:28:37,107 --> 00:28:38,185
Please stop.
242
00:28:41,373 --> 00:28:43,415
Do you have a boyfriend or something?
243
00:28:46,024 --> 00:28:48,652
Yeah, I do actually.
244
00:28:50,940 --> 00:28:54,011
Oh... That's nice...
245
00:28:55,605 --> 00:28:57,584
How long have you
guys been going out for?
246
00:28:58,405 --> 00:29:00,064
That's personal.
247
00:29:01,184 --> 00:29:01,937
Okay.
248
00:29:02,903 --> 00:29:07,740
People don't usually get defensive about how
long they've been going out with someone for.
249
00:29:09,238 --> 00:29:11,075
Can I ask what his name is?
250
00:29:14,699 --> 00:29:15,705
Rupert.
251
00:29:15,705 --> 00:29:16,787
Rupert?
--Yeah.
252
00:29:17,270 --> 00:29:18,867
Sounds like a bear's name.
253
00:29:20,509 --> 00:29:22,586
So what does Rupert do?
254
00:29:23,697 --> 00:29:24,607
Nothing.
255
00:29:26,105 --> 00:29:27,668
Just like you?
256
00:29:27,668 --> 00:29:29,418
Yeah.
257
00:29:29,418 --> 00:29:31,947
Sounds like you
guys are a perfect match.
258
00:29:32,630 --> 00:29:33,849
Yeah!
259
00:29:34,422 --> 00:29:35,641
So how'd you guys meet?
260
00:29:36,317 --> 00:29:38,052
Around.
--Around?!
261
00:29:38,535 --> 00:29:41,774
Cool... real good description, that.
262
00:30:11,583 --> 00:30:13,698
I'm sorry but I need that chair free.
263
00:30:14,664 --> 00:30:16,309
Oh yeah, cool.
264
00:30:16,309 --> 00:30:20,000
I'll move when whoever
you're meeting gets here.
265
00:30:20,918 --> 00:30:23,402
Can you please just leave!
266
00:30:23,402 --> 00:30:27,272
Just have a conversation with me,
get to know me,
267
00:30:27,272 --> 00:30:28,416
you might be surprised.
268
00:30:29,769 --> 00:30:32,111
Come on, just talk to me--
269
00:30:33,657 --> 00:30:35,154
Are you gonna piss off if I do?
270
00:30:35,154 --> 00:30:36,145
Absolutely I will.
271
00:30:38,217 --> 00:30:39,167
I work in advertising.
272
00:30:39,167 --> 00:30:39,667
Advertising?
273
00:30:39,667 --> 00:30:40,681
Yeah.
274
00:30:40,681 --> 00:30:42,012
What you do in advertising?
275
00:30:42,012 --> 00:30:43,668
I'm a copywriter.
276
00:30:43,668 --> 00:30:45,110
Oh, that sounds cool, I'd really
277
00:30:45,110 --> 00:30:46,794
love to do something like that.
278
00:30:46,794 --> 00:30:48,805
I'm sure you would.
279
00:30:48,805 --> 00:30:51,450
Is copyrighting why you're so interested
280
00:30:51,450 --> 00:30:52,328
in books?
281
00:30:53,584 --> 00:30:56,290
There's literally no similarities
between those two things.
282
00:30:56,676 --> 00:30:57,593
Both involve writing
283
00:30:57,690 --> 00:31:02,609
Uh, copywriting's more technical. I just fix
dumb long sentences.
284
00:31:02,609 --> 00:31:03,689
Right.
285
00:31:04,962 --> 00:31:06,410
You need some help with that?
286
00:31:08,842 --> 00:31:09,763
No...?
287
00:31:09,763 --> 00:31:10,273
You sure?
288
00:31:10,273 --> 00:31:10,945
Yeah.
289
00:31:11,670 --> 00:31:14,664
But you're a writer, right?
290
00:31:14,664 --> 00:31:15,357
Yeah...
291
00:31:16,838 --> 00:31:18,735
It just sounds like you might need some help.
292
00:31:20,233 --> 00:31:21,678
What do you mean?
293
00:31:21,678 --> 00:31:24,757
You just seem very edgy.
294
00:31:25,047 --> 00:31:27,003
A bit... pretentious.
295
00:31:28,597 --> 00:31:31,225
Don't-don't talk to me like that--
296
00:31:31,225 --> 00:31:34,215
Or what? You're gonna force me to shake your hand again?
297
00:31:37,162 --> 00:31:39,668
Does this way of flirting ever work for you?
298
00:31:39,668 --> 00:31:42,665
All I've tried to do is be polite.
299
00:31:43,197 --> 00:31:45,265
Just because I think you're cute
doesn't mean I'm flirting with you.
300
00:31:45,265 --> 00:31:46,597
You're trying way too hard.
301
00:31:46,597 --> 00:31:48,719
Well you're clearly just playing hard to get.
302
00:31:48,719 --> 00:31:50,214
No, I'm really not.
303
00:31:50,214 --> 00:31:52,059
You're still talking to me, you wouldn't
304
00:31:52,059 --> 00:31:54,030
be talking to me if you weren't interested.
305
00:31:54,223 --> 00:31:56,460
Talk about setting the bar low!
306
00:31:56,460 --> 00:31:58,822
I'm only interested in getting you to leave!
307
00:31:59,643 --> 00:32:01,584
Do you get off on winding people up?!
308
00:32:01,584 --> 00:32:03,920
You're just making it really enjoyable.
309
00:32:06,376 --> 00:32:07,412
Can't take a bit of banter?
310
00:32:07,412 --> 00:32:09,449
I thought guys like you love that.
311
00:32:09,449 --> 00:32:10,655
What do you mean guys like me?
312
00:32:10,655 --> 00:32:12,793
You creeps follow girls into cafes.
313
00:32:12,793 --> 00:32:14,186
I'm not a creep!
314
00:32:14,862 --> 00:32:17,318
And I'm not a "guy like me"
315
00:32:17,318 --> 00:32:18,866
there's no one like me.
316
00:32:19,397 --> 00:32:21,230
Again, pretentious!
317
00:32:21,230 --> 00:32:22,394
It's true though.
318
00:32:26,984 --> 00:32:29,966
Hang on, I'll take that back.
319
00:32:30,932 --> 00:32:34,037
Yeah, you do seem
a bit different...
320
00:32:35,167 --> 00:32:38,821
A bit special.
321
00:32:41,286 --> 00:32:42,710
That was unnecessary.
322
00:32:46,620 --> 00:32:51,058
You know, I saw you in here last week, chatting
with that guy and being really flirty
323
00:32:51,058 --> 00:32:53,418
you were so desperate, you were gagging for it.
324
00:32:53,804 --> 00:32:54,842
What did you just say?
325
00:32:54,842 --> 00:32:56,846
That's the only reason I'm talking to you,
you looked easy.
326
00:32:56,846 --> 00:32:58,225
You're clearly a whore!
327
00:32:58,225 --> 00:33:00,126
You need to fucking leave me alone, right now!
328
00:33:00,126 --> 00:33:01,887
Or what? Are you gonna
scream?
329
00:33:01,887 --> 00:33:02,876
Go away!
330
00:33:02,876 --> 00:33:05,751
47 Cheshire Drive by Golder's Green Station.
331
00:33:11,841 --> 00:33:13,288
Be careful who you're rude to you,
332
00:33:13,288 --> 00:33:14,543
you fucking cunt!
333
00:33:50,807 --> 00:33:52,380
This is pointless.
334
00:33:53,395 --> 00:33:54,208
Why?
335
00:33:54,208 --> 00:33:55,278
You know the only reason I'm here.
336
00:33:57,210 --> 00:33:58,476
My parents?!
337
00:33:58,476 --> 00:34:02,004
I'm not sure--
I know you tell them everything--
338
00:34:03,501 --> 00:34:05,725
My communication with your parents is strictly
339
00:34:05,725 --> 00:34:11,057
limited, I can assure you. Patient confidentiality
is of the utmost importance.
340
00:34:11,057 --> 00:34:14,274
So when I miss an appointment what do you tell them?
341
00:34:14,274 --> 00:34:18,124
I'm obliged to inform them -- because they pay.
342
00:34:18,124 --> 00:34:19,110
Semantics...
343
00:34:20,849 --> 00:34:21,918
Huey, where's this coming from?
344
00:34:21,918 --> 00:34:23,753
They were more than happy to ship me off to London,
345
00:34:23,753 --> 00:34:28,210
but they just can't help stick their nose
in my shit, sniffing around, and I know you
346
00:34:28,210 --> 00:34:32,799
peddle them whatever bullshit you think they
want to hear - I shouldn't even be here there's
347
00:34:32,799 --> 00:34:34,191
nothing wrong with me.
348
00:34:35,544 --> 00:34:36,798
Do you really believe that?
349
00:34:36,798 --> 00:34:37,841
You tell me.
350
00:34:40,450 --> 00:34:42,758
Huey, you know what you've been diagnosed with--
351
00:34:42,758 --> 00:34:45,210
You can't just stick labels on me and make
352
00:34:45,210 --> 00:34:48,161
out that's the complete picture, the whole me.
353
00:34:50,000 --> 00:34:51,737
Have you been taking your antidepressants?
354
00:34:52,848 --> 00:34:53,891
I ran out...
355
00:34:55,050 --> 00:34:56,849
I prescribed you a full month's worth -
356
00:34:56,849 --> 00:34:58,503
it's been what - three weeks?
357
00:34:58,503 --> 00:34:59,471
Maybe I flushed them.
358
00:35:04,000 --> 00:35:08,940
Huey, at our last appointment, you were talking
about getting into the headspace of your character.
359
00:35:10,725 --> 00:35:11,791
Why?
360
00:35:14,710 --> 00:35:16,168
Take a guess.
361
00:35:18,970 --> 00:35:22,601
Could you take a few moments and get into
the headspace of "Huey"--
362
00:35:23,423 --> 00:35:25,339
What kind of psychoanalysis is this?
363
00:35:28,960 --> 00:35:33,323
You think that I'm that mental that I need
to act to be me?
364
00:35:35,352 --> 00:35:37,362
Have you ever experienced any feelings of
disassociation?
365
00:35:37,362 --> 00:35:40,140
Yeah, when I first started going
366
00:35:40,140 --> 00:35:46,270
to therapy - getting picked apart by people -
it was fascinating at first. I learned a lot
367
00:35:46,270 --> 00:35:51,220
about behaviour and psychology. You might not
think it -- it was actually really good training.
368
00:35:51,220 --> 00:35:57,020
You start to pick up on things about people,
and then you can start toying with them, seeing
369
00:35:57,020 --> 00:36:00,000
how they react - seeing how I react.
370
00:36:02,260 --> 00:36:14,620
Ritalin, Sertraline, Lamotrigine - you medicate
me, you analyse me, you say a few words and
371
00:36:14,620 --> 00:36:20,619
you call it progress. But what I learned is
that psychology is actually just snake oil
372
00:36:20,619 --> 00:36:25,960
it's all just fucking nonsense. All I'm telling
you is things that you want to hear otherwise
373
00:36:25,960 --> 00:36:29,607
these sessions would be so fucking boring, I'd
end up putting my head through the window!
374
00:36:30,670 --> 00:36:33,426
I just lead you along with threads--
Huey!
--manlipulating you
375
00:36:33,426 --> 00:36:35,502
Why are you being defensive?
376
00:36:35,502 --> 00:36:37,371
I'm not being defensive--
I think you are.
377
00:36:37,371 --> 00:36:41,158
You think a lot of things,
none of it has any substance.
378
00:36:44,859 --> 00:36:47,636
Huey, what is your normal?
379
00:36:53,240 --> 00:36:58,802
It's cutting my forearms because it feels nice.
380
00:37:00,977 --> 00:37:02,266
Is that the truth?
381
00:37:04,730 --> 00:37:05,505
Take a guess.
382
00:37:08,159 --> 00:37:09,632
Who is the real Huey?
383
00:37:11,033 --> 00:37:15,390
I see what you're trying to do.
You bore people by waffling
384
00:37:15,390 --> 00:37:18,500
saying the same thing over and over trying
to catch me out.
385
00:37:18,500 --> 00:37:19,317
I'm not trying to catch you
386
00:37:19,800 --> 00:37:22,448
Bullshit!
--I just want you to be open and honest.
387
00:37:22,448 --> 00:37:25,176
What's the point? Everybody lies.
388
00:37:28,171 --> 00:37:31,370
Huey, you mentioned struggling with your impulses
what are they--
389
00:37:31,370 --> 00:37:32,706
None of your business
390
00:37:32,706 --> 00:37:37,032
Is it harming yourself? Harming others?
391
00:37:37,032 --> 00:37:37,532
No.
392
00:37:40,849 --> 00:37:46,290
Do you ever feel yourself acting repetitively,
moving things that are out of place into place?
393
00:37:49,418 --> 00:37:50,842
Would you say you're a perfectionist?
394
00:37:51,762 --> 00:37:52,730
Yeah.
395
00:37:55,190 --> 00:38:00,032
So with your writing do you feel as if it
will ever be perfect enough--
396
00:38:00,032 --> 00:38:01,339
Who the fuck knows.
397
00:38:03,030 --> 00:38:05,168
Would you ever let anybody else write your
ideas?
398
00:38:05,168 --> 00:38:06,103
Of course not
399
00:38:09,295 --> 00:38:11,211
So you'd like to be in control?
400
00:38:11,839 --> 00:38:12,841
Who doesn't?!
401
00:38:13,904 --> 00:38:15,590
And would it make you angry if someone took
402
00:38:15,590 --> 00:38:16,967
that control away from you?
403
00:38:16,967 --> 00:38:17,859
Of course it would.
404
00:38:17,859 --> 00:38:19,562
If I told you what you could and couldn't do
405
00:38:19,562 --> 00:38:20,633
you'd be pissed off.
406
00:38:21,309 --> 00:38:26,350
So if you had a boss who told you
to clean the toilets, how would you feel?
407
00:38:26,350 --> 00:38:29,655
You think I'm that much of a piss
ant that I'd be cleaning toilets for a living?!
408
00:38:30,000 --> 00:38:31,043
Please answer the question.
409
00:38:31,043 --> 00:38:32,264
I'd tell him to fuck off!
410
00:38:33,230 --> 00:38:34,732
And do you think that's normal?
411
00:38:34,732 --> 00:38:35,631
Yes!
412
00:38:35,970 --> 00:38:37,610
Jesus fucking christ, what's your point?!
413
00:38:39,543 --> 00:38:44,163
So if you had an agent who criticized
your writing, how would you react?
414
00:38:44,163 --> 00:38:47,787
I'd tell him he hadn't a fucking
clue what he was talking about
415
00:38:47,787 --> 00:38:49,331
and then I'd fire him.
416
00:38:50,000 --> 00:38:51,421
What if he was right?
417
00:38:51,421 --> 00:38:52,649
He wouldn't be.
418
00:38:52,649 --> 00:38:54,146
What if he was?
419
00:38:54,146 --> 00:38:55,330
Stop with this shit.
420
00:38:57,359 --> 00:39:02,380
Is that why you haven't let anybody read your
writing until now because you're afraid--
421
00:39:05,955 --> 00:39:09,636
I'm not afraid of anything.
422
00:39:09,636 --> 00:39:15,064
Have you ever felt fear?
Please answer the question.
423
00:39:15,064 --> 00:39:16,379
What does it feel like?
424
00:39:16,379 --> 00:39:17,740
It was what it was.
425
00:39:17,740 --> 00:39:18,913
Describe it to me.
426
00:39:18,913 --> 00:39:20,796
How am I supposed to describe an emotion?
427
00:39:21,037 --> 00:39:21,684
Try.
428
00:39:21,684 --> 00:39:22,334
Fuck off!
429
00:39:22,962 --> 00:39:23,755
Excuse me?
430
00:39:23,755 --> 00:39:24,940
You heard me -- fuck off!
431
00:39:27,356 --> 00:39:28,970
I understand you might be flustered
432
00:39:28,970 --> 00:39:31,812
but please do not swear at me
433
00:39:31,812 --> 00:39:32,846
Or what?
434
00:39:34,875 --> 00:39:37,321
Or I shall no longer be able
to see you as a patient.
435
00:39:52,394 --> 00:39:53,814
Sorry.
436
00:39:59,418 --> 00:40:02,267
Do you feel as if there is a void inside you?
437
00:40:02,267 --> 00:40:02,767
Stop.
438
00:40:05,589 --> 00:40:07,042
Huey please answer the question.
439
00:40:07,042 --> 00:40:07,884
Stop.
440
00:40:10,236 --> 00:40:10,929
Huey--
441
00:40:10,929 --> 00:40:11,518
You're so full of shit!
442
00:40:11,518 --> 00:40:14,035
This is a safe space, you can be honest--
443
00:40:14,035 --> 00:40:16,035
Shut the fuck up!
444
00:40:17,818 --> 00:40:18,543
Do you--
445
00:40:19,461 --> 00:40:20,113
Wait!
446
00:40:54,785 --> 00:40:56,126
Huey!
447
00:40:58,940 --> 00:41:03,427
Do you not hear me ringing this doorbell for?!
I'm freezing my fucking tits off out here man.
448
00:41:08,292 --> 00:41:09,292
Hey.
449
00:41:13,979 --> 00:41:15,337
You're not gonna say hello?
450
00:41:16,179 --> 00:41:17,477
What are you doing?
451
00:41:17,477 --> 00:41:20,000
I was in the neighbourhood,
thought I'd drop by.
452
00:41:20,392 --> 00:41:23,477
I'm busy--
Writing, yeah? Let me read it.
453
00:41:23,477 --> 00:41:24,704
No-I'm--
454
00:41:24,704 --> 00:41:26,181
Top floor right?
455
00:41:26,181 --> 00:41:27,181
Yeah?
456
00:41:34,089 --> 00:41:35,340
Hey man,
457
00:41:39,501 --> 00:41:42,597
Didn't you used to have a couch in your room?
I thought I could crash on it.
458
00:41:44,040 --> 00:41:44,960
What do you think you're doing?
459
00:41:44,960 --> 00:41:46,005
Helping you out mate.
460
00:41:46,543 --> 00:41:47,479
Don't!
461
00:41:47,835 --> 00:41:51,900
C'mon bro! You said I read it at the pub.
That's why I'm here.
462
00:41:51,900 --> 00:41:53,431
No I fucking didn't.
463
00:41:53,431 --> 00:41:57,043
You're so fucking high-strung,
I'm just trying to help you out man.
464
00:42:05,854 --> 00:42:09,273
This is great man, this reads
like a fucking nut jobs diary man.
465
00:42:09,273 --> 00:42:10,354
Stop reading.
466
00:42:11,109 --> 00:42:14,831
Chill man, I'm enjoying it--
Stop--
Mate, I'm chill, I'm enjoying it all right!
467
00:42:16,570 --> 00:42:18,019
What's that...?
468
00:42:21,256 --> 00:42:23,010
What are you doing mate!
469
00:42:23,010 --> 00:42:25,371
Hey, don't be a fucking twat man,
what kind of joke is this?
470
00:42:25,371 --> 00:42:26,434
It's not funny -- dude!
471
00:42:26,434 --> 00:42:27,216
I'm gonna fucking kill you!
472
00:42:27,216 --> 00:42:27,957
Please stop man!
473
00:42:29,162 --> 00:42:32,078
Shut the fuck up!
474
00:42:36,421 --> 00:42:40,000
You touched my fucking laptop,
you invaded my fucking space!
475
00:42:40,000 --> 00:42:43,367
Who the fuck do you think you are?!
476
00:49:02,991 --> 00:49:05,845
Their all objects.
477
00:50:27,771 --> 00:50:29,807
It's pointless.
478
00:50:32,085 --> 00:50:34,085
There's no point in struggling...
479
00:50:36,017 --> 00:50:38,199
I can't let you leave now, it's too late.
480
00:50:42,837 --> 00:50:44,837
I've crossed the rubicon.
481
00:50:46,886 --> 00:50:48,596
This is it.
482
00:50:51,457 --> 00:50:53,457
I know your flatmates are away.
483
00:50:55,100 --> 00:50:56,955
Their on holiday, right?
484
00:50:59,037 --> 00:51:00,636
You're all alone.
485
00:51:02,636 --> 00:51:04,636
No-one's coming to save you.
486
00:51:11,254 --> 00:51:13,716
I can feel how scared you are--
487
00:51:14,684 --> 00:51:17,803
if you scream it'll only serve to hasten things.
488
00:51:21,378 --> 00:51:22,896
Please...
489
00:51:25,533 --> 00:51:26,721
Please...
490
00:51:28,025 --> 00:51:29,088
I won't tell anyone.
491
00:51:30,247 --> 00:51:32,776
I just... please... don't.
492
00:51:34,595 --> 00:51:36,929
I've already told you it's too late.
493
00:51:37,833 --> 00:51:39,220
Why are you doing this.
494
00:51:43,182 --> 00:51:44,477
It's nothing personal.
495
00:51:45,781 --> 00:51:48,712
Well, no, I take that back. It kind of is.
496
00:51:49,630 --> 00:51:51,909
Do you remember me?
497
00:51:58,353 --> 00:51:59,744
Yeah, I bet you do.
498
00:52:01,677 --> 00:52:05,584
I told you to be careful
who you're rude to.
499
00:52:07,069 --> 00:52:11,947
You've had the chance to escape - all this time -
you should have taken it.
500
00:52:16,778 --> 00:52:18,123
Somewhere,
501
00:52:19,475 --> 00:52:21,285
in your subconscious,
502
00:52:21,285 --> 00:52:23,606
you must have wanted this to happen.
503
00:52:23,606 --> 00:52:25,024
I'm sorry...
504
00:52:32,012 --> 00:52:35,030
I already told you it's too late to apologize
505
00:52:35,030 --> 00:52:36,935
and I can tell you don't really
506
00:52:36,935 --> 00:52:37,678
mean it.
507
00:52:38,741 --> 00:52:40,047
I am...
508
00:52:40,530 --> 00:52:43,707
I didn't mean to be so rude.
509
00:52:45,156 --> 00:52:47,501
I'm so sorry...
510
00:52:48,907 --> 00:52:50,989
I'm sorry!
511
00:52:53,211 --> 00:52:54,829
Shut up!
512
00:52:54,829 --> 00:52:55,329
Please...
513
00:52:56,567 --> 00:52:58,176
I don't want--
514
00:52:58,176 --> 00:53:00,822
Please just let me go!
515
00:53:00,822 --> 00:53:03,450
Shut the fuck up!
516
00:53:09,712 --> 00:53:10,712
Every time!
517
00:53:16,074 --> 00:53:20,770
Why is it every time with those
518
00:53:20,770 --> 00:53:22,045
eyes.
519
00:53:26,248 --> 00:53:27,686
I'm sorry...
520
00:53:30,000 --> 00:53:31,465
Do you even know
521
00:53:32,335 --> 00:53:34,305
what those eyes mean?
522
00:53:35,513 --> 00:53:38,897
Do you even understand what they do to me?
523
00:53:40,000 --> 00:53:43,007
It's so overwhelming - it's too fucking much -
the feeling I get--
524
00:53:43,007 --> 00:53:46,657
It's like you're you're-you're-you're all wounded animals.
525
00:53:47,527 --> 00:53:51,167
I just don't fucking know what to do.
526
00:53:52,244 --> 00:53:56,771
It's too fucking much - it's too
overwhelming, so just stop.
527
00:54:02,182 --> 00:54:04,104
Sometimes it just feels so intense
528
00:54:05,408 --> 00:54:06,837
I just don't know what to do.
529
00:54:06,837 --> 00:54:08,570
I-I can't stay in control
530
00:54:08,812 --> 00:54:11,422
And I want to be in control.
531
00:54:12,050 --> 00:54:14,922
What kind of man am I
if I can't be in control.
532
00:54:18,553 --> 00:54:23,430
Oh god, I just feel like I'm going to explode
right here and now.
533
00:55:10,720 --> 00:55:11,720
So...
534
00:55:18,193 --> 00:55:19,207
Huey.
535
00:55:19,207 --> 00:55:20,830
Don't say my name.
536
00:55:24,020 --> 00:55:25,684
You don't need to do this.
537
00:55:26,941 --> 00:55:28,638
You don't seem like a bad person.
538
00:55:30,169 --> 00:55:31,652
You're just confused.
539
00:55:32,908 --> 00:55:36,978
I can tell you're having doubts about this
but you haven't done anything yet.
540
00:55:38,669 --> 00:55:43,078
You can leave now and I won't tell anyone, I swear
I promise, no-one will never know--
541
00:55:43,706 --> 00:55:45,918
I don't want this!
542
00:55:45,918 --> 00:55:48,594
I don't deserve this, I don't want--
543
00:55:48,972 --> 00:55:50,649
How's your throat?
544
00:56:07,509 --> 00:56:09,350
What do you think I'm gonna do to you?
545
00:56:11,766 --> 00:56:13,674
Don't rape me!
546
00:56:16,862 --> 00:56:17,942
Rape you?!
547
00:56:20,000 --> 00:56:21,063
Do you think I'm an animal?!
548
00:56:24,995 --> 00:56:27,989
I'm not going to rape you!
549
00:56:31,933 --> 00:56:33,589
What I'm gonna do--
550
00:56:36,263 --> 00:56:38,351
I don't even know how to explain this--
551
00:56:43,182 --> 00:56:44,092
for me
552
00:56:45,445 --> 00:56:47,712
this is a morbid curiosity.
553
00:56:49,807 --> 00:56:55,327
Or maybe it's like, jumping off a precipice
and finally getting rid of the guilt.
554
00:56:56,807 --> 00:56:59,053
I'll be a charlatan if I don't do it.
555
00:57:00,000 --> 00:57:02,682
The whole thing is like an intrusive thought,
556
00:57:02,682 --> 00:57:05,360
I keep thinking over and over and over again -- I've
tried to justify my way out of it but the
557
00:57:05,360 --> 00:57:08,730
arguments just keep going round and round
in circles in my head. I've tried writing it
558
00:57:08,730 --> 00:57:11,697
to get it out of my system but that just made
it worse it just made me--
559
00:57:11,697 --> 00:57:13,321
I wasn't able to
560
00:57:19,312 --> 00:57:21,277
I don't want to torture you.
561
00:57:22,581 --> 00:57:24,257
That's cruel.
562
00:57:25,824 --> 00:57:27,391
I'm not that kind of person.
563
00:57:31,186 --> 00:57:33,548
This is my catharsis.
564
00:57:40,457 --> 00:57:43,548
I know this whole conversation is just
prolonging the inevitable.
565
00:57:43,548 --> 00:57:44,995
But I know it, you know it--
566
00:57:46,927 --> 00:57:47,621
but
567
00:57:50,020 --> 00:57:52,928
I guess I just want you to understand, maybe?
568
00:57:54,528 --> 00:57:56,321
Or maybe I just want to tell the truth for once
569
00:57:56,321 --> 00:58:00,000
because I keep having to lie,
like half-truths all the time.
570
00:58:01,961 --> 00:58:03,275
Never saying what it really is
571
00:58:03,275 --> 00:58:04,207
for fear of being judged.
572
00:58:04,207 --> 00:58:06,269
I-I just have to get this out of my system.
573
00:58:10,000 --> 00:58:11,324
I've been
574
00:58:11,324 --> 00:58:13,555
too scared
575
00:58:14,231 --> 00:58:15,743
to say what it really is.
576
00:58:15,743 --> 00:58:17,001
Scared of the consequences.
577
00:58:17,001 --> 00:58:18,340
Scared of anything like - fucking hell - it gives
578
00:58:18,340 --> 00:58:21,568
me a panic attack just-just-just saying it.
579
00:58:21,568 --> 00:58:24,609
My hands they go numb and my heart -- it starts
580
00:58:24,609 --> 00:58:28,424
beating so fast, I think it's going to pound
out of my chest but it makes me feel so alive
581
00:58:28,424 --> 00:58:31,620
and at the same time I think I'm going to
die because of it -- and at the same time at
582
00:58:31,620 --> 00:58:35,507
the back of my head, I-I-I think I'm scared.
583
00:58:36,570 --> 00:58:37,525
Like
584
00:58:39,554 --> 00:58:40,620
what if
585
00:58:41,200 --> 00:58:43,234
killing someone
586
00:58:43,234 --> 00:58:45,187
doesn't feel as good as the fear.
587
00:58:47,120 --> 00:58:48,056
Or worse
588
00:58:50,000 --> 00:58:52,915
what if it feels even better.
589
00:58:53,833 --> 00:58:55,285
Even more intense.
590
00:58:56,880 --> 00:59:00,080
There isn't the drug in the world that could compare with that.
591
00:59:01,384 --> 00:59:04,260
Do you know how utterly terrifying that is?
592
00:59:05,130 --> 00:59:08,485
To know that you could be so
utterly addicted to something
593
00:59:08,485 --> 00:59:12,624
that you could never be able to
imagine life without it.
594
00:59:14,121 --> 00:59:18,082
It-it's honestly driving me insane and I've
tried everything to get it out of my system.
595
00:59:18,082 --> 00:59:19,254
Everything.
596
00:59:20,317 --> 00:59:22,092
But nothing works
597
00:59:23,686 --> 00:59:25,290
so I just have to face facts.
598
00:59:28,140 --> 00:59:30,000
I've tried killing myself.
599
00:59:30,859 --> 00:59:31,808
Seriously.
600
00:59:32,291 --> 00:59:34,543
When I slashed my forearms up,
601
00:59:35,509 --> 00:59:36,354
I tried
602
00:59:37,706 --> 00:59:38,697
to cut the vein but
603
00:59:38,697 --> 00:59:40,000
it didn't cut deep enough.
604
00:59:40,959 --> 00:59:42,160
But I think I knew that.
605
00:59:44,051 --> 00:59:48,350
And do you know how tempting it is to just
throw yourself in front of a train on the
606
00:59:48,350 --> 00:59:49,230
underground.
607
00:59:50,000 --> 00:59:52,433
I honestly don't know why more
people don't do it.
608
00:59:53,641 --> 00:59:55,599
And yeah, I mean before
609
00:59:55,599 --> 00:59:58,444
you ask I did think about throwing someone
onto the tracks
610
00:59:58,444 --> 00:59:59,806
but is that really the same as--
611
01:00:00,772 --> 01:00:02,298
as killing someone with your bare hands?
612
01:00:02,298 --> 01:00:04,423
I-I don't think it is--
613
01:00:05,197 --> 01:00:06,886
No, I think I've--
614
01:00:08,079 --> 01:00:09,740
I think I've got to wring your fucking neck
615
01:00:09,740 --> 01:00:10,530
and then I'll know.
616
01:00:13,682 --> 01:00:15,714
I honestly don't know why I stopped.
617
01:00:30,884 --> 01:00:32,157
I'm so fucked up.
618
01:00:34,524 --> 01:00:36,221
I wish I wasn't.
619
01:00:42,168 --> 01:00:43,381
But at some point
620
01:00:44,106 --> 01:00:47,285
you just have to accept
who you are and live with it.
621
01:00:49,121 --> 01:00:52,189
I must have been born this way, I reckon.
622
01:00:52,189 --> 01:00:53,605
That's the only way it makes any sense
623
01:00:55,247 --> 01:00:57,730
It was god [that] made me like this.
624
01:01:00,774 --> 01:01:04,863
And if God didn't want you to be harmed
625
01:01:06,457 --> 01:01:09,041
he wouldn't have put you before me.
626
01:01:15,176 --> 01:01:17,870
Do you know how hard it is to keep up a facade?
627
01:01:20,624 --> 01:01:25,407
It's nice being honest with you.
628
01:01:25,407 --> 01:01:29,241
being honest with myself for once, it's like-a
629
01:01:29,241 --> 01:01:31,321
a weight off my shoulders.
630
01:01:33,833 --> 01:01:37,573
I mean -if I jumped right now
631
01:01:39,216 --> 01:01:41,702
I think I'd float up into the air
632
01:01:41,702 --> 01:01:43,133
like a feather.
633
01:01:45,999 --> 01:01:47,568
It's unreal.
634
01:02:01,611 --> 01:02:04,197
You know what - I'm being incredibly rude
talking about myself for so long
635
01:02:04,197 --> 01:02:06,021
why don't you -- why don't
636
01:02:06,021 --> 01:02:07,254
you tell me something about yourself.
637
01:02:07,254 --> 01:02:10,000
When think about it, I don't really
know anything about you.
638
01:02:17,816 --> 01:02:19,323
What's wrong?
639
01:02:23,042 --> 01:02:24,056
Well?
640
01:02:32,462 --> 01:02:33,688
That's rude.
641
01:02:38,403 --> 01:02:42,578
When someone asks you a question, you should
answer them.
642
01:02:48,375 --> 01:02:50,151
What are you, deaf?
643
01:02:52,808 --> 01:02:54,518
Talk, Jesus!
644
01:02:57,031 --> 01:02:58,799
Why are you being so rude?
645
01:02:58,799 --> 01:03:00,797
I mean I know you don't
have any tact, but--
646
01:03:04,226 --> 01:03:08,021
You couldn't stop begging before, and now you
don't want to say anything?!
647
01:03:08,793 --> 01:03:09,700
What is wrong with you?!
648
01:03:10,231 --> 01:03:11,167
This is ridiculous!
649
01:03:12,422 --> 01:03:13,247
Why are you doing this?!
650
01:03:13,849 --> 01:03:15,980
You are literally behaving like a doll right now!
651
01:03:15,980 --> 01:03:19,300
You are a human fucking being,
652
01:03:19,300 --> 01:03:20,484
you need to act like one!
653
01:03:20,484 --> 01:03:22,250
What's the point in all this if you don't?!
654
01:03:25,777 --> 01:03:27,366
What are you doing?!
655
01:03:28,912 --> 01:03:30,397
What am I supposed to do right now?
656
01:03:31,218 --> 01:03:33,089
You're just gonna lie there and act like nothing--
657
01:03:33,089 --> 01:03:34,429
none of this is happening?!
658
01:03:36,168 --> 01:03:37,781
Stop acting like a fucking doll!
659
01:03:37,781 --> 01:03:40,413
You are a human being!
660
01:03:40,413 --> 01:03:42,314
Pay attention to me!
661
01:04:26,616 --> 01:04:27,852
Hollow.
662
01:04:33,418 --> 01:04:35,169
I didn't expect it to feel this hollow.
663
01:04:37,094 --> 01:04:40,449
Why has finishing your novel made you feel
this way?
664
01:04:41,222 --> 01:04:42,881
Is it a lack of fulfilment?
665
01:04:42,881 --> 01:04:43,742
No...
666
01:04:45,433 --> 01:04:48,408
It's not a lack of anything.
667
01:04:51,693 --> 01:04:53,084
I've simmered down,
668
01:04:53,084 --> 01:04:54,716
that's all.
669
01:04:58,822 --> 01:05:02,316
I thought that something intense would happen,
that it would all be overwhelming but--
670
01:05:05,552 --> 01:05:07,563
I just feel incredibly
671
01:05:10,000 --> 01:05:10,886
settled.
672
01:05:12,094 --> 01:05:13,244
It's disconcerting.
673
01:05:20,000 --> 01:05:22,262
I was worried that this would become an obsession
674
01:05:23,229 --> 01:05:25,440
and I was scared of that.
675
01:05:28,768 --> 01:05:30,867
But the reality is so much worse.
676
01:05:35,166 --> 01:05:37,225
I'm not really following...
677
01:05:39,396 --> 01:05:41,587
You know what I think all this is going to
become now?
678
01:05:43,036 --> 01:05:44,212
Subsistence.
679
01:05:45,469 --> 01:05:46,475
Subsistence?
680
01:05:46,475 --> 01:05:47,596
Yeah, like
681
01:05:48,599 --> 01:05:50,894
in the future it's all just
going to bubble up again.
682
01:05:52,537 --> 01:05:53,901
I won't be able to...
683
01:05:57,138 --> 01:05:58,992
And now that I know what the cure is--
684
01:06:00,000 --> 01:06:03,373
I feel sick to the pit of my stomach but I know that
685
01:06:03,373 --> 01:06:05,643
even that will pass.
686
01:06:08,880 --> 01:06:13,863
I just didn't expect after all the adrenaline
it would feel like when I hurt myself.
687
01:06:21,110 --> 01:06:24,767
We're not talking about your writing now, are we?
688
01:06:27,569 --> 01:06:28,504
Does it matter?
689
01:06:29,807 --> 01:06:30,452
Yes.
690
01:06:31,660 --> 01:06:33,158
It's not important.
691
01:06:33,158 --> 01:06:34,233
Yes it is.
692
01:06:34,233 --> 01:06:36,344
No, it isn't.
693
01:06:37,020 --> 01:06:37,759
Huey
694
01:06:38,919 --> 01:06:40,450
what have you done?
695
01:06:46,974 --> 01:06:48,157
I guess...
696
01:06:50,531 --> 01:06:51,828
play god.
697
01:07:01,483 --> 01:07:04,110
It's the end of our session.
48160
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese