All language subtitles for Happy Days s04e20 The Physical.eng

? Sunday, Monday, happy days ?

? Tuesday, Wednesday,
happy days ?

? Thursday, Friday, happy days ?

? The weekend comes,
my cycle hums ?

? Ready to race to you ?

? These days are ours ?

? These days are ours ?

? Good-bye, gray sky,
hello, blue ?

? There's nothing can hold me
when I hold you ?

? It feels so right
it can't be wrong ?

? Rockin' and rollin'
all week long ?

(organ solo plays
over rhythmic handclaps)

? Sunday, Monday, happy days ?

? Tuesday, Wednesday,
happy days ?

? Thursday, Friday, happy days ?

? Saturday, what a day ?

? Groovin' all week with you ?

? These days are ours ?

? These days are ours ?

? These happy days ?

? Are yours and mine ?

? These happy days are yours ?

? And mine, Happy Days! ?

Happy Days is filmed
before a studio audience.

MARION:
Richard, I wanted you to get up early this morning

so that I could get
all your dirty clothes.

Well, it's not that late, Mom.
How did you sleep so late?

I want to get
all this work over-- oh!

Look, I know
there's a mess.

I'm sorry, I j-- I just got in
a little late last night.

I noticed.

Did you "find your thrill
on Blueberry Hill"?

Bill, bill,
Occupant, bill.

It seems like all I do
is pick up after you.

Well, I'm picking,
Mom, I'm picking.

I mean, he's not a baby anymore.

He's going to be going
to college.

He's a man.
Now he is.

What do you mean?

You've been drafted.

I've been drafted?

He's been drafted?

He can't go.

Dad, will you open that?

He's just a boy.

He's too young
to go in the Army.

Oh, Marion, look,

this is just a notice to report
for a physical examination.

Now, that doesn't mean
he's drafted.

Yeah, but I-I didn't
plan this.

I mean,
who would plan this?

Oh, Richard, let me
take those things.

Oh, you'll be
going away soon.

Marion, will you take it easy?

We knew this day was going
to come sooner or later.

Now, look, we're not at war.

He'll probably go in
as an officer.

You are planning to continue
ROTC in college, aren't you?

Yeah, I've already taken it
for two years in high school,

but... hey, I'm going
to find Potsie and Ralph

and see if they got
their notices, too.

What's going on?

Oh, Richard just got
his draft notice.

Great.

You'll get
to see the world--

Rome and Paris.

Maybe you'll even get
to see Bob Hope.

Bob Hope can sit on it.

I'll be
all right.

Don't worry
about it.

Be careful, dear.

Hey, hey, guys, I've been
looking all over for you.

I just got my
notice here

to take my physical
for the draft.

The line forms
to the right.

Oh, good,
I'm glad I'm not alone.

Oh, I mean, I'm sorry
that they got you guys,

but it's just that
I didn't want to--

I'm just going to
get in line here.

(chuckles)

My dad doesn't
want me to go.

He says war is bad
for my sense of humor.

My dad's trying to rent my room.

I don't want to
go to Guadalcanal.

Ralph, they're not going
to send you to Guadalcanal.

We won that battle.

Oh, yeah.

I'll go there.

I like occupied islands.

They play volleyball.

They meet you at the beach
and they dive for coins.

Who just slammed that door?

Who just slammed that door
in my ears?

No, Fonzie,
strong wind today.

Really, it was just the wind.

Yeah, right,
just the wind.

Now, listen
up, all right?

Kim Butkus is coming, coming
by to pick up her car.

I haven't finished it yet.

So will you please take
your soap opera somewhere else?

Wait a minute, this
is not a soap opera.

This is life.

Your life is a soap opera.

Listen, the Army's going
to be good for you.

Make men out of you...
most of you.

Hey, Fonz,
why didn't they call on you?

Are you
kidding, Pots?

The Fonz is our
secret weapon.

Heyyy.

Richard, eat your pancakes.

Your eggs and bacon
will be ready in a minute.

It's hard to eat
at 5:30 in the morning.

It's still dark outside.

Well, I want you
to have a big breakfast

because you'll need energy
for your physical.

It doesn't take
that much energy

to walk around
in your underwear.

Bye, everybody,
I'm off to work.

(birds chirping)

Marion, look at this.

Get the camera quick.

We got a total eclipse.

Oh, no, Howard,

it's 5:30
in the morning, dear.

I set your alarm clock ahead

so that you could get up
and say good-bye to Richard.

I'm sorry.

Have a nice physical, Richard.

That wasn't
an eclipse?

No.

You'll wake me
when we have one?

Yes.

Dad, Dad, w-why don't you
at least eat some pancakes

with me while
you're up?

Well, okay,
if there's plenty

of maple syrup.

MARION:
Plenty, dear.

Doesn't anybody sleep
around this place?

We're all up to
see Richard off.

I made his
favorite breakfast.

(chuckling):
C rations?

Boy, I tell you,
I remember in the Army

when I had to get up
at 5:30 in the morning.

Oh, Howard, please.

War stories are
always so gruesome.

What's gruesome about K.P.?

Well, I'm gonna have
to get going now.

I'll see you later.
Oh, Richard.

Is it time
already?

Well, I'm going
back to bed.

This looks like it's going
to be real tearjerker.

Bye, Rich.

Don't forget my kimono.

Have a nice life.

(knocking)

Oh, they've
come for you.

I could hide him in the attic.

It's all right, Mom, it's fine.

Greetings.
Yeah, hi, guys. Rich, Mr. C.

Hi.

Well, thanks
for the breakfast.

We got to get going now.
Well, wait, now,

Ralph and Potsie might
like some breakfast.

Yeah, yeah.
Good idea, okay.

Mom, we don't have
time for this.

We'll take it
along with us.

Come on.
Right, Pots. Hi, Howie.

Richard.

Here's your lunch
for the physical.

Now, did you put on
your clean... underwear?

(both laughing)

Well, did you, Rich?

Yeah, I put on my
ROTC underwear.

Come on, we got to
be there at 0700.

I'll return the maple syrup.

Well, we're off to the Army.

Don't worry, Mr. C.

I'll take good care
of him for you.

(groans)

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Okay, everybody,
group "B" in here.

Move it, move it,
move it, move it,

move it,
move it, move it, move it,

move it.

Wait a second,
I said group "B".

That says "C."

What are you, some kind of
college graduate or something?

Out, out!

I hate college
graduates.

All right, men.

My name is
Sergeant Betchler.

Hmm?

And that's the way I
like it pronounced--

Betchler.

All right, before we start
anything, what is that smell?

Well, uh, that-that's my lunch.

My mother made it
for me.

I-It's a sardine sandwich.

It's my favorite kind.

Oh, it's your favorite, huh?

I-I-I'll find some place
to put it.

Yeah, I
hope you do.

Oh.

Ah, not under Ike.

Oh.

Eh...

Oh, yeah, no, no,
not under the flag.

That's right, let me help you,
let me help you.

Oh, good, you found
a place for it.

I think it's a real,
a real nice place, too, I...

Sit down.
Right.

All right,
where was I?

Oh, yeah,
before we start,

are there
any notes

from doctors,
clergymen, or employers?

All right, front
and center.

You've got a note,
don't you, Ralph?

Yeah, you know, my
dad's an optometrist.

This note says
I'm legally blind.

He even wanted me
to bring a dog.

All right, so
your doctor thinks

you're too short to
be in the Army, huh?

Corporal.

Take this man outside and
put two inches on him.

I measure
lumps.

Okay, anybody
else with a note?

Uh, Ralph has one.

Red has a note.

(mumbling)

Yeah... good.

No more notes.

Good fake, Ralph.

What fake?

All right, when I call your
name, I want you to answer up.

Weber.
Up!

All right, wise guy,
give me five push-ups.

But you said answer "up."
Make it ten.

Cunningham.

Here.

Dockerelli.

Here.

Fonzarelli...
Fonzarelli.

You're a little late,
aren't you, "Funichelli"?

I'm really sorry.

It was my fault,
Sergeant, uh, "Belcher."

(laughter)

That's Sergeant Betchler.

Whatever.

You see,
I should have known better

than to, to date the Aloha
Pussycats on a weeknight.

(laughter)

All right,
knock it off.

Fall in.

Yeah, listen,
we got to hurry this up.

I got to be
out of here by noon.

Oh, is that so?

Yeah, yeah,
I got a date.

Oh, a date.
Isn't that nice?

Let me tell you
something.

Your dates might be nice.

I got a date
with the Hooper triplets.

(indistinct chatter)

All right,
knock it off.

Sit over there,
lover boy.

I can't wait
till we cut your hair.

ALL:
Oh...

All right, we're going
to fill out some forms now.

Last name first
and your first name last,

middle initial.

Nobody writes until
I tell them to write.

Fonz, what are you doing here?

I got a personal invitation
from Uncle Sam.

Fonzie, why didn't
you tell us about it?

Well, you know
what happened

when they tried
to induct Elvis into the Army.

Oh, yeah, a bunch
of girls went crazy

and tore down the
induction center.

Exactamundo.

Now, who told you
to start writing?

I thought of it
all on my own.

(laughter)

All right, knock it off.

You know, Fonzarelli,

I'd like to get you alone in
a room for about five minutes.

Sarge, I didn't think
you were that kind of guy.

All right, knock it off!

Knock it off!

You know, when you go to the
barber, I'm gonna go with you--

to supervise the...

(mimicking clippers)

Maybe when he's finished
with my hair,

he'll do my nails.

RALPH:
Good, Fonz.

Fonz, Fonz, you just
better be careful,

'cause this guy
is mean.

He just sent out a
short kid to grow.

Okay, uh, Sergeant
Betchler says,

write your names.

Good.

Okay, anybody here

have prior military
experience?

(softly clears throat)

Sgt. Betchler...

Hey, you said that nice.

Say it again.

Betchler.

You're gonna get your lunch
back.

I had ROTC in high school.

Oh, you want to
be an officer.

Yeah, I-I would.

Ah, good. You're--

Well, you're in charge,
Cunningham.

Very good.

Anybody steps out of
line, I come to you.

Yes, sir.

No, no, don't
call me "sir".

Only officers
are called sir.

I'm a non-com.

I could have been
a "sir".

Should have
been a "sir".

Could have been
a "sir".

Would have been
a-a good "sir".

I'm better than
all those guys.

And you're all gonna
listen to me,

including you, Fonzarelli,
because I don't like you.

You see all these
hash marks?

I'm a 20-year man.

I been a man all my life.

(guys laugh)

You know I supervised
Elvis's haircut,

and yours is gonna
be shorter.

GUYS:
Ooh!

Now, I guess you guys
are smart enough

to have finished
your names by now.

Uh, excuse me.

Was that the last name first
or first name last?

Ten push-ups.

(laughs)

Ah, you want
to giggle, huh?

Give me ten.

You know, you're a nice kid,
Cunningham.

Say my name again.

Sergeant Belcher.

(guys cheer and laugh)

All right, give me ten!

(cheering)

All right, line up.

Hey, Corporal,
get a load of this.

ROTC,

little duckies
and a big ant.

These guys are here
to entertain us.

Hey, uh, where's
Fonzarelli?

Hey, Cunningham, is this
any way to run an outfit?

Uh, Fonz,
come on out, okay?

Are you afraid

somebody's gonna steal
your little jacket?

No.

I was afraid maybe
I'd get caught in a draft.

(guys laugh)

All right,
knock it off.

You think
that's funny? Yeah.

Hey, here's something
that's funny.

All people wearing
jackets

at the end
of the line.

I said the end
of the line.

This is the end
of the line.

The front end.

All right.

Blood tests.

Everybody, line up.

Everybody has to give
a blood sample.

Rich, no one told me

I was suppose to bring
a blood sample.

Potsie, they're gonna take it
out of your finger.

And it's gonna
hurt real bad.

I can't stand pain.
I'm leaving.

Hey, Ralph,
I'm gonna help you.

Get up there.
Thanks, Fonz.

You're gonna be
just fine. Thanks.

All right.

Hey, guys, what do
you know about that?

I didn't feel a thing.

(screaming)

Okay, he'll be fine.

Hey, Fonz, you missed
the blood test.

GUYS:
Ooh!

Can I do him?

Okay, Weber,

maybe next time you won't try
to fill up all the bottles.

All right, talking
about bottles,

I'm gonna leave you
for a few minutes.

Now, when I'm gone,

I know some of you guys
are gonna miss me.

(overlapping chatter)

When I'm gone, Lt. Quinlan's
gonna be in charge

of the next phase.

While I'm away,

ROTC will take over.

Watch it, watch it,
watch it, watch it.

(door opens)

POTSIE:
All right.

Good morning, men.

Hey, it's a
Lieutenant woman.

ALL:
Good morning, Lieutenant.

I'm Richard Cunningham,
ROTC.

I-I'm kind of
in charge here.

I'm sorry that I'm
in my underwear.

Well, don't worry.

Uh, like they say in
the Medical Corps,

if I see anything I
haven't seen before,

I'll shoot it.

All right,

now each of you is
gonna run up

and down these
stairs briskly.

Like this.

Then you'll be checked
for pulse and heartbeat.

Uh... Fonzarelli.

Yo.

Go over these steps

and I want you
to touch each step.

Cute, Fonzarelli.

It's, uh,

hard to do this
through leather.

I'll take it
off for you.

Now hear this,
now hear this.

All nurses fall out
for night maneuvers.

Turn around.
Yeah.

Could you move that
up a little bit?

A little over
to the left.

Aaayyh!

Ahhhh.

You're one of the healthiest
men I've ever met.

You ain't whistli''
Dixie, Jack.

Listen, you and me
together, soon,

and that is an order.

I've been trained
to follow orders.

Next.

Uh... uh, Malph.

Atten-hut!

What do you think
this is?

Get that ant
in gear

and move it
over the hill!

Move it!

Everything works
for him.

Move it! Hut-two.

You'll be notified

as to your proper

classification...

When?

Uh, no-no interruptions.

Now I gotta do the whole thing
over again.

You'll be notified

as to your proper classification

resulting from today's physical.

I look forward

to seeing all you guys
again real soon.

I hope not too soon.

You want to eat some
more paper, Red?

I'm full.

Good.

All right, everybody
from ROTC down,

dismissed.

All right, move,
move, move!

Oh, uh, Khaki
Drawers,

here's your lunch.

Hey, wait a minute.

My Twinkies are
missing.

Spoils of war.

Okay.

He took my Twinkies!
Hey, hey.

MP! Come on over here!
Hey, hey, hey!

He took my Twinkies!
All right, all right.

Look, here's
a quarter.

Buy yourself some
new Twinkies.

All right, Rich!
All right!

(guys cheering and applauding)

All right, the back row.

Out. Fast. Make it fast.
On the double.

Yeah, yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah, yeah.

Whoa.

You probably noticed

that you're the only one
still here.

Well, I ain't surprised.

I had an inkling
I was your favorite.

Looks like you missed
a pretty good date,

huh, Fonzarelli?

Oh, hey, don't worry about it,
non-com,

the army always comes first.

Ah, that's good to hear

because it's gonna take
about an hour or two

to fill out these
forms again.

You see, I
couldn't read it.

Maybe-maybe this time
you should print.

Must I?

Yeah.

The last one that didn't
fill out the forms

is scrubbing camels
in the Sahara.

Well, listen, I hate to
disappoint you, Sarge,

but I gotta be
some place else.

Okay, wise guy,

give me ten push-ups.

Seven.

Hey, I never thought
you'd get here!

Sorry I'm late.
At ease.

What's going on here?

Just a little discipline, sir.

Uh, Fonzarelli, uh,
did the forms wrong,

and he has to fill 'em out
again.

That won't do.

I need this man to help me

with some research.

He'll be
in my charge.

You know, Louie, uh,
don't you think

he's a little out
of shape here?

You're right.

Give me ten.

I coulda been an officer.

I shoulda been an officer.

All right, fellas,
what a day for football.

All right.
All right.

Hut! Hey.

POTSIE:
Let's go outside.

We're gonna play some
touch football. Come on.

C'mon, Joanie.
Oh!

As long as you don't play
"dump the center".

Come on, Fonzie,
play quarterback.

All right.

All right, I'll play
quarterback

for both teams.

Aaayyh!

Marion, are you crying?

Oh, Howard,

I just hate
to see them grow up.

What if the Army takes them?

They're all one-A.

Well, then they'll
all apply

for their college
deferments.

What if there's a war?
What if...

Oh, now come on,
Marion,

I mean the whole world
practically has the bomb.

There are not gonna
be any more wars.

The UN will see
to that.

I think the world has
learned their lesson.

We'll never have to send
our boys to fight again.

Oh, I hope so, Howard.

FONZIE:
All right, hey Pots, go long.

Go long!
Okay.

RICHIE:
I'll hit the quarterback!

RALPH:
I'll cover him. I'll cover him.

RICHIE:
I'll hit the quarterback!

FONZIE:
Oh, yeah?

RICHIE:
Oh, oh, kidding, Fonz!

POTSIE:
I got it! I got it! I got it!

FONZIE:
Wait a minute, it's going over his head.

RALPH:
Uh-oh.

You kids!

What is the matter with you!

How many times have I told you

not to play so close
to the house! FONZIE:

BOYS:
Joanie did it!

? These happy days
are yours and mine ?

? These are such Happy Days! ?

? Good-bye, gray sky,
hello, blue ?

? There's nothing can hold me
when I hold you ?

? It feels so right,
it can't be wrong ?

? Rockin' and rollin'
all week long ?

? These days are ours ?

? These days are ours ?

? These happy days
are yours and mine ?

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