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1
00:00:03,378 --> 00:00:06,338
Wanna spend time playing the new
"Star Wars" game this weekend?
2
00:00:06,506 --> 00:00:09,508
Mm, I don't know,
I promised myself I'd get off the computer...
3
00:00:09,676 --> 00:00:12,344
...be more physically active,
get some exercise.
4
00:00:12,512 --> 00:00:15,556
You're about to walk up
three flights of stairs.
5
00:00:16,850 --> 00:00:19,268
Well, good point. I'm in.
6
00:00:20,603 --> 00:00:23,522
You know what would be great?
Let's do it like the old days.
7
00:00:23,690 --> 00:00:26,233
- Mm, you talking gaming marathon?
- Yeah.
8
00:00:26,401 --> 00:00:30,654
Start Saturday morning, go 48 hours,
sleeping bags, junk food.
9
00:00:30,822 --> 00:00:34,283
HOWARD: Turn off our phones
so our moms can't call.
10
00:00:36,119 --> 00:00:39,496
It'll be like our "World of Warcraft" party
when the neighbors called the cops on us.
11
00:00:39,664 --> 00:00:40,706
(HOWARD CHUCKLES)
12
00:00:40,874 --> 00:00:44,918
They called the cops because of the smell.
They thought we were dead.
13
00:00:47,130 --> 00:00:49,631
We were bad-ass back in the day.
14
00:00:51,968 --> 00:00:55,220
- All right, let's do it.
- Forty-eight hours of "Star wars" gaming.
15
00:00:55,388 --> 00:00:57,347
It's on like Alderaan.
16
00:00:57,515 --> 00:00:58,932
(ALL CHUCKLE)
17
00:00:59,851 --> 00:01:01,477
Hey, Sheldon, clear your weekend.
18
00:01:01,644 --> 00:01:03,520
Starting Saturday morning,
"Star Wars" marathon.
19
00:01:03,688 --> 00:01:05,773
- Woo-hoo.
- Movies or video games?
20
00:01:05,940 --> 00:01:07,858
Or board games? Or trading-card games?
21
00:01:08,026 --> 00:01:10,360
Or Legos? Or dress-up? Or comic books?
22
00:01:10,528 --> 00:01:12,321
Or dramatic readings of novelizations?
23
00:01:12,489 --> 00:01:14,490
Yes to all.
24
00:01:16,117 --> 00:01:18,535
We are going to play the online game.
25
00:01:18,703 --> 00:01:21,663
The online game? Bully.
26
00:01:22,624 --> 00:01:24,625
As much as I'm sure Sheldon would enjoy...
27
00:01:24,793 --> 00:01:27,628
...playing intergalactic make-believe,
he and I have plans.
28
00:01:27,796 --> 00:01:30,756
We are attending my Aunt Flora's
93rd birthday party.
29
00:01:31,257 --> 00:01:33,092
Just tell her I can't come.
30
00:01:33,551 --> 00:01:35,469
She'll be disappointed if we don't show.
31
00:01:35,637 --> 00:01:38,514
She's 93.
She won't be disappointed for very long.
32
00:01:40,850 --> 00:01:42,810
Hang on. I followed all the protocols...
33
00:01:42,977 --> 00:01:45,437
...set forth by you
in the Relationship Agreement.
34
00:01:45,605 --> 00:01:48,774
I made a written request
72 hours in advance.
35
00:01:49,526 --> 00:01:51,735
Checked the tire pressure on the car.
36
00:01:51,903 --> 00:01:53,904
I contacted the
Centers for Disease Control...
37
00:01:54,072 --> 00:01:57,407
...to find out what shots they
recommend for travel to Orange County.
38
00:01:58,827 --> 00:02:01,161
FYI, it's none.
39
00:02:01,746 --> 00:02:03,413
Amy, the Relationship Agreement...
40
00:02:03,581 --> 00:02:06,250
...was not designed
for either one of us to get our way.
41
00:02:06,918 --> 00:02:08,252
You use it to get your way.
42
00:02:08,419 --> 00:02:10,420
I use it to get the right way.
43
00:02:11,965 --> 00:02:15,300
The fact that the right way
is also my way is a happy coincidence.
44
00:02:17,053 --> 00:02:19,555
You gave me your word.
You're coming with me.
45
00:02:19,722 --> 00:02:20,889
We'll miss you, Sheldon.
46
00:02:21,057 --> 00:02:23,517
Yeah? Well, who wants
to spend the whole weekend...
47
00:02:23,685 --> 00:02:27,104
...running around a bunch of pretend
planets battling made-up monsters?
48
00:02:27,272 --> 00:02:31,150
- That's for babies.
- Yeah, but it's got lightsabers.
49
00:02:31,317 --> 00:02:34,778
Yeah. Please, Amy, it's got lightsabers.
50
00:03:01,347 --> 00:03:03,223
- Hello, Stuart.
- Hey, Sheldon.
51
00:03:03,391 --> 00:03:05,017
- Help you with anything?
- Yes.
52
00:03:05,185 --> 00:03:08,854
I'm attending a party this weekend
for a 93-year-old woman.
53
00:03:10,398 --> 00:03:12,566
Can you recommend a gift?
54
00:03:13,193 --> 00:03:15,027
Uh, I don't know.
55
00:03:15,195 --> 00:03:18,363
Could put a tennis ball on the end
of Excalibur...
56
00:03:18,531 --> 00:03:21,325
...make a pretty bad-ass cane.
57
00:03:21,993 --> 00:03:23,243
Do you supply the ball?
58
00:03:23,411 --> 00:03:25,037
- No.
- Then no.
59
00:03:26,789 --> 00:03:29,666
- What else?
- Uh, oh.
60
00:03:29,834 --> 00:03:33,503
Got this collector's edition
Batman Utility Belt.
61
00:03:33,671 --> 00:03:37,299
Maybe she could use it
as a wearable pill caddy.
62
00:03:38,384 --> 00:03:42,429
Well, she'd just look silly wearing that
without the rest of the costume.
63
00:03:45,058 --> 00:03:47,226
Um, sorry, Sheldon, that's it.
That's all I got.
64
00:03:47,393 --> 00:03:50,103
It's not your fault.
I've been to the model-train store.
65
00:03:50,313 --> 00:03:54,316
I've been to Radio Shack.
This woman's impossible to shop for.
66
00:03:55,068 --> 00:03:57,527
I'd make fun of Sheldon
for having girl problems...
67
00:03:57,695 --> 00:04:00,530
...if I wasn't in shock
that Sheldon has girl problems.
68
00:04:01,574 --> 00:04:03,450
Well, Leonard, go ahead and mock.
69
00:04:03,618 --> 00:04:05,118
It's like my daddy always said:
70
00:04:05,328 --> 00:04:09,039
"Shelly, women aren't anything
but flipping pains in the bottom."
71
00:04:11,542 --> 00:04:13,752
That's what your father used to say?
72
00:04:13,920 --> 00:04:17,923
Well, I took out the bad words
and the "yeehaw," but you get the gist.
73
00:04:19,217 --> 00:04:22,761
If you don't wanna go to the party,
just don't go. You're a grown man.
74
00:04:22,929 --> 00:04:26,431
Act like one. Tell Amy you wanna spend
the weekend having a sleepover...
75
00:04:26,599 --> 00:04:28,850
...and playing video games
with your friends.
76
00:04:30,228 --> 00:04:34,439
Yeah, maybe she'll dig it.
Women like a firm hand on the tiller.
77
00:04:34,607 --> 00:04:36,108
I can never find the tiller.
78
00:04:39,237 --> 00:04:41,905
I got a book. It didn't help.
79
00:04:42,782 --> 00:04:45,284
Yeah, I always thought
if I were ever enslaved...
80
00:04:45,451 --> 00:04:48,662
...it would be by an advanced species
from another planet...
81
00:04:48,871 --> 00:04:51,957
...not some hotsy-totsy from Glendale.
82
00:04:52,750 --> 00:04:57,629
I downloaded an app
that might be helpful in this situation.
83
00:04:57,797 --> 00:04:58,922
(WHIP CRACKS ON PHONE)
84
00:04:59,090 --> 00:05:01,091
(HOWARD, RAJESH & LEONARD
LAUGHING)
85
00:05:02,969 --> 00:05:07,180
You're right. I'm smart as a whip.
I should be able to figure this out.
86
00:05:11,102 --> 00:05:13,812
Listen, I kind of made plans
with the guys this weekend.
87
00:05:13,980 --> 00:05:16,815
I wondered, because
we're in this relationship beta test...
88
00:05:16,983 --> 00:05:18,817
...if I should have asked you first.
89
00:05:18,985 --> 00:05:21,611
Then I thought if
I did check with you first...
90
00:05:21,779 --> 00:05:24,698
...you'd think that
I was taking things too seriously...
91
00:05:24,907 --> 00:05:27,034
...and then I got a nosebleed.
92
00:05:29,329 --> 00:05:31,747
You don't have to check with me.
Do whatever you want.
93
00:05:31,914 --> 00:05:33,457
Oh.
94
00:05:33,624 --> 00:05:36,335
Guess I was hoping
for a different reaction, but okay.
95
00:05:36,711 --> 00:05:39,504
- Really? What were you hoping for?
- I don't know.
96
00:05:39,672 --> 00:05:41,548
Maybe that you'd be a little upset.
97
00:05:41,716 --> 00:05:45,844
And then you'd realize that
I'm a stallion that has to run free.
98
00:05:50,016 --> 00:05:52,517
And that would turn you on a little.
99
00:05:53,019 --> 00:05:54,978
Okay, I'm an actress. Ask me again.
100
00:05:55,146 --> 00:05:56,313
(CLEARS THROAT)
101
00:05:56,981 --> 00:06:00,150
Do you mind if I spend the weekend
playing games with the guys?
102
00:06:00,318 --> 00:06:03,528
Wha...? The entire weekend?
You mean I wouldn't see you at all?
103
00:06:03,696 --> 00:06:08,200
But I do... No, no,
I knew what I was getting into.
104
00:06:09,035 --> 00:06:11,370
You can't put a saddle
on Leonard Hofstadter.
105
00:06:13,373 --> 00:06:18,502
Oh, my, is it getting hot in here? Ay, Papi.
106
00:06:19,212 --> 00:06:21,630
"Ay, Papi"?
107
00:06:21,798 --> 00:06:23,965
- What is that?
- An acting choice.
108
00:06:24,133 --> 00:06:25,175
LEONARD:
Hmm.
109
00:06:25,343 --> 00:06:27,552
So you chose that
when you become turned on...
110
00:06:27,720 --> 00:06:30,472
...you'd turn into Speedy Gonzalez.
111
00:06:31,849 --> 00:06:33,850
Do you got a problem with that, Papi?
112
00:06:35,520 --> 00:06:36,561
Uh-uh.
113
00:06:36,729 --> 00:06:37,771
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
114
00:06:37,939 --> 00:06:40,399
SHELDON:
Penny? Penny? Penny?
115
00:06:40,566 --> 00:06:44,569
Sorry, Stallion.
Your weird friend Giraffe is here.
116
00:06:46,239 --> 00:06:50,367
Hello, Penny. I just stopped by
to bring you this gift.
117
00:06:50,535 --> 00:06:51,952
Gummi Bears? Thank you.
118
00:06:52,120 --> 00:06:53,745
Now that you're in my debt...
119
00:06:53,913 --> 00:06:54,955
(PENNY SIGHS)
120
00:06:55,123 --> 00:06:58,458
...please manipulate Amy into
releasing me from my commitment...
121
00:06:58,626 --> 00:07:01,628
...to attend her aunt's tedious
birthday party.
122
00:07:02,213 --> 00:07:03,964
- Not a chance.
- All right.
123
00:07:04,132 --> 00:07:06,758
I thought the candy might not
be enough, so let me up the ante.
124
00:07:06,926 --> 00:07:10,137
Ahem. These are Cooper Coupons.
125
00:07:10,304 --> 00:07:13,098
These are for various things
I can do for you.
126
00:07:13,266 --> 00:07:16,810
Um, oh, this one is for
one free grammar check.
127
00:07:17,019 --> 00:07:18,437
Uh...
128
00:07:18,604 --> 00:07:21,898
You could use it for e-mails,
letters, tattoos, what have you.
129
00:07:22,066 --> 00:07:23,567
Uh...
130
00:07:23,734 --> 00:07:26,278
Oh, this is a fun one.
This is an afternoon with me...
131
00:07:26,446 --> 00:07:31,324
...at the California Science Center
where I point out their mistakes.
132
00:07:32,285 --> 00:07:36,246
Keep an eye on those expiration dates.
I've been burned more than once.
133
00:07:37,540 --> 00:07:39,916
I'm not gonna get involved
in your relationship.
134
00:07:40,084 --> 00:07:42,836
Come on. It's just a simple favor.
When's the last time...
135
00:07:43,045 --> 00:07:45,464
- ...I asked you to do something for me?
- Yesterday.
136
00:07:45,631 --> 00:07:49,342
You made me look in your ear
to see if there was a ladybug in it.
137
00:07:49,552 --> 00:07:52,846
Last time I asked you to do something
that wasn't a medical emergency?
138
00:07:53,055 --> 00:07:57,309
Yesterday. You made me look in your ear
to see if there was a ladybug in it.
139
00:07:58,102 --> 00:07:59,519
All right, I have no choice...
140
00:07:59,687 --> 00:08:01,980
- ...but to go on to plan B.
- What's that?
141
00:08:02,148 --> 00:08:04,983
Run around outside with a wet head
and try to catch a cold.
142
00:08:09,489 --> 00:08:12,199
- Good morning.
- Hello.
143
00:08:12,366 --> 00:08:16,203
I think you'll really enjoy yourself today.
You get to meet my relatives.
144
00:08:16,370 --> 00:08:18,872
Since my aunt's nursing home
is catering the party...
145
00:08:19,081 --> 00:08:22,626
...all the food is incredibly soft.
It's like a vacation for your teeth.
146
00:08:22,793 --> 00:08:24,377
All right.
147
00:08:26,172 --> 00:08:28,840
- You sure you're okay with this?
- Yes.
148
00:08:29,008 --> 00:08:33,720
I decided to find a way that
I could have this experience and enjoy it.
149
00:08:34,347 --> 00:08:36,473
Thank you. That means a lot to me.
150
00:08:36,641 --> 00:08:39,351
Oh, don't thank me.
Thank wireless technology.
151
00:08:39,519 --> 00:08:42,562
Yeah, I realized I can go
to your aunt's awful party...
152
00:08:42,730 --> 00:08:46,816
...and still spend the whole day
gaming with my friends.
153
00:08:48,194 --> 00:08:50,195
My relatives are gonna wanna talk to you.
154
00:08:50,363 --> 00:08:52,697
And you're gonna be sitting there
playing a game?
155
00:08:52,865 --> 00:08:56,826
- Isn't that a little rude?
- Oh, I got that covered.
156
00:08:56,994 --> 00:09:00,872
Headset. I won't hear a word
the old geezers are saying.
157
00:09:03,876 --> 00:09:07,546
If playing that game is more important
than honoring your commitment to me...
158
00:09:07,713 --> 00:09:10,090
...and you don't mind me showing up
all by myself...
159
00:09:10,258 --> 00:09:13,009
...after I've told everybody
I'll be bringing somebody...
160
00:09:13,177 --> 00:09:14,803
...then fine, go home and play your game.
161
00:09:14,971 --> 00:09:16,513
(ENGINE STARTS)
162
00:09:17,557 --> 00:09:21,393
Thanks. Oh, listen.
163
00:09:22,061 --> 00:09:24,729
I wouldn't mind a piece of birthday cake...
164
00:09:24,897 --> 00:09:29,067
...provided the old gal's candle blow
is clean and dry.
165
00:09:36,867 --> 00:09:40,704
Here you go. I've got everything
we'll need for the big game.
166
00:09:40,871 --> 00:09:43,915
Low-fat turkey jerky.
167
00:09:44,083 --> 00:09:46,418
Low-carb beer.
168
00:09:46,711 --> 00:09:49,588
Hundred-calorie snack packs.
169
00:09:50,548 --> 00:09:53,925
Pick up a Y chromosome while
you were there? You might be short one.
170
00:09:54,594 --> 00:09:57,721
Hey, I plan on leveling up in the game,
not my swimsuit size...
171
00:09:57,888 --> 00:09:59,598
...thank you very much.
172
00:09:59,765 --> 00:10:01,933
Gentlemen,
the game offers us a choice...
173
00:10:02,101 --> 00:10:04,769
...between playing for the Republic
and the light side...
174
00:10:04,937 --> 00:10:07,772
...or the Sith Empire and the dark side.
175
00:10:07,940 --> 00:10:10,775
We're always the good guys.
In "D&D" we're lawful good.
176
00:10:10,943 --> 00:10:13,778
In "City of Heroes" we're heroes.
In "Grand Theft Auto"...
177
00:10:13,946 --> 00:10:17,240
...we pay the prostitutes promptly
and never hit them with a bat.
178
00:10:20,494 --> 00:10:22,495
Those women are prostitutes?
179
00:10:23,956 --> 00:10:26,791
You said they were raising money
for stem-cell research.
180
00:10:29,295 --> 00:10:31,129
Hey, guys. I got a surprise.
181
00:10:31,297 --> 00:10:35,634
Mm, if it's yogurt that helps ladies poop,
I think Raj beat you to it.
182
00:10:36,302 --> 00:10:39,095
No, Bernadette's gonna be playing with us.
183
00:10:39,263 --> 00:10:42,849
So that's pretty cool, huh?
Right? Sure, it is.
184
00:10:43,517 --> 00:10:45,435
Wha...? You invited your girlfriend?
185
00:10:45,603 --> 00:10:48,647
- This is supposed to be our weekend.
- I had no choice.
186
00:10:48,814 --> 00:10:52,275
She said, "Why don't we go out
for brunch and maybe the arboretum?"
187
00:10:52,443 --> 00:10:56,029
I said, "No, I promised the guys I was
gonna play a video game with them."
188
00:10:56,238 --> 00:10:59,157
She said, "Can I come?"
Then I didn't answer for a second.
189
00:10:59,325 --> 00:11:01,368
Then she said,
"Do you not want me to come?"
190
00:11:01,535 --> 00:11:03,328
Then I bought her a new laptop
and the game...
191
00:11:03,496 --> 00:11:05,622
...and she's parking the car now.
192
00:11:06,874 --> 00:11:10,335
Is the whip-sound app
contextually appropriate here?
193
00:11:10,503 --> 00:11:14,798
Uh, it is, but I think you might have
waited too long for it to be funny.
194
00:11:15,800 --> 00:11:16,841
(WHIP CRACKS ON PHONE)
195
00:11:17,009 --> 00:11:19,386
(LEONARD AND RAJESH LAUGHING)
196
00:11:19,887 --> 00:11:23,056
- I was wrong. It's still funny.
- Oh, good.
197
00:11:23,849 --> 00:11:25,225
(CACKLES)
198
00:11:29,689 --> 00:11:30,855
Oh.
199
00:11:31,023 --> 00:11:34,275
- Amy, what's wrong?
- My boyfriend's a jerk.
200
00:11:35,486 --> 00:11:38,196
Well, I know he didn't cheat on you,
so, what happened?
201
00:11:40,491 --> 00:11:42,409
I had to go to my aunt's party by myself.
202
00:11:42,576 --> 00:11:46,037
Everybody was like, "where's this
boyfriend you talk about? Is he real?
203
00:11:46,205 --> 00:11:49,708
Or did you make him up like Armin
the miniature-horse breeder?"
204
00:11:51,335 --> 00:11:53,545
Who's Armin the miniature-horse breeder?
205
00:11:53,713 --> 00:11:57,006
The pretend boyfriend I invented
to get my family off my back.
206
00:11:57,174 --> 00:12:01,177
It unraveled quickly when I couldn't answer
the question "How did you two meet?"
207
00:12:02,388 --> 00:12:05,098
- I would've thought at a horse show.
- Oh, that's good.
208
00:12:05,266 --> 00:12:06,766
Mm.
209
00:12:07,810 --> 00:12:10,437
I panicked and said Woodstock.
210
00:12:10,604 --> 00:12:11,688
(SIGHS)
211
00:12:11,856 --> 00:12:13,898
I just wanted to show Sheldon off
to my family.
212
00:12:14,400 --> 00:12:17,402
Sure, I get that. I mean,
he's your first boyfriend and all.
213
00:12:17,570 --> 00:12:21,406
Not just my first boyfriend. He's the best
boyfriend. I mean, think about it.
214
00:12:21,574 --> 00:12:24,409
I'm dating Sheldon Cooper.
215
00:12:26,746 --> 00:12:29,372
Yes, on purpose.
216
00:12:29,915 --> 00:12:33,126
He's handsome, he's lanky, he's brilliant.
217
00:12:33,335 --> 00:12:36,921
His skin has that pale, waxy quality.
218
00:12:37,423 --> 00:12:39,424
Well, sickly is the new sexy.
219
00:12:42,636 --> 00:12:44,429
- Yeah.
- Mm.
220
00:12:45,639 --> 00:12:46,765
You know, Amy...
221
00:12:46,932 --> 00:12:50,268
...when you're in a relationship
with someone you really care about...
222
00:12:50,436 --> 00:12:53,313
...the sucky part is
it leaves you open to getting hurt.
223
00:12:53,481 --> 00:12:55,440
Do you ever worry about Leonard
doing that to you?
224
00:12:55,608 --> 00:12:58,109
Ha, ha, that's hilarious. No.
225
00:13:00,654 --> 00:13:02,280
Get that guy! Get that guy!
226
00:13:02,448 --> 00:13:04,824
Pew, pew, pew!
227
00:13:06,035 --> 00:13:08,578
Uh, Dr. Rostenkowski,
it may interest you to know...
228
00:13:08,746 --> 00:13:13,458
...that saying, "Pew, pew, pew," isn't
as effective as pressing your blaster key.
229
00:13:13,959 --> 00:13:18,421
In the same way that saying, "Whee,"
doesn't make the landspeeder go.
230
00:13:19,882 --> 00:13:21,716
Pew!
231
00:13:22,968 --> 00:13:26,638
- Raj, imperial Troopers on your tail.
RAJESH: Unh. Got him.
232
00:13:26,972 --> 00:13:29,766
When Gandhi advocated
his philosophy of nonviolence...
233
00:13:29,934 --> 00:13:33,645
...I bet he didn't know how much fun
it was killing stuff.
234
00:13:34,480 --> 00:13:37,857
All right, I think we got them all.
Let's divide up the loot.
235
00:13:38,025 --> 00:13:40,360
BERNADETTE: Ooh, look at
this pretty purple robe I just got.
236
00:13:40,528 --> 00:13:42,821
You should put on yours
and then we'll match.
237
00:13:42,988 --> 00:13:45,657
But I worked hard to get this armor, heh.
238
00:13:45,825 --> 00:13:49,786
Sorry, I just thought it'd be nice
if people knew we were a couple.
239
00:13:50,830 --> 00:13:52,205
Fine, I'll change.
240
00:13:53,999 --> 00:13:55,917
(WHIP CRACKS ON PHONE)
241
00:14:00,381 --> 00:14:01,422
(CACKLES)
242
00:14:05,970 --> 00:14:07,637
I don't think I wanna play a game.
243
00:14:07,805 --> 00:14:10,473
They're playing one across the hall.
We should too.
244
00:14:10,641 --> 00:14:14,352
Okay, we are gonna take turns
bouncing a quarter off the table.
245
00:14:14,520 --> 00:14:17,188
If it goes into this cup,
the other person has to drink.
246
00:14:17,356 --> 00:14:20,191
Then you get to go again, and you ki...
247
00:14:23,737 --> 00:14:27,031
- Like that?
- Wow, yeah, beginner's luck.
248
00:14:27,199 --> 00:14:29,868
So now I will drink this entire cup of beer...
249
00:14:30,035 --> 00:14:33,037
...and you will go again and we can...
250
00:14:36,500 --> 00:14:39,711
All right, so, yeah.
Okay, now I'm gonna drink this entire cup.
251
00:14:39,879 --> 00:14:41,963
And then I'm going to drink another one.
252
00:14:42,464 --> 00:14:45,049
Okay, seriously, stop. What the hell?
253
00:14:46,051 --> 00:14:49,679
I spent my childhood throwing coins
into wishing wells hoping for friends.
254
00:14:49,847 --> 00:14:53,433
At a certain point, you start doing
trick shots to keep things interesting.
255
00:14:53,601 --> 00:14:56,060
Oh, give me a second
to catch up here, hold on.
256
00:14:56,228 --> 00:14:58,146
(MEN SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY
THROUGH WALL)
257
00:14:58,856 --> 00:15:00,273
That'd be my boyfriend...
258
00:15:00,482 --> 00:15:04,110
...happier playing his Star Trek game
with friends than hanging out with me.
259
00:15:04,278 --> 00:15:06,404
- Wars.
- What?
260
00:15:06,906 --> 00:15:09,574
Star Wars. They get all cranky
when you mix the two up.
261
00:15:10,034 --> 00:15:13,912
- What's the difference?
- There's absolutely no difference.
262
00:15:15,998 --> 00:15:18,249
How do I get him to treat me better?
263
00:15:18,626 --> 00:15:21,628
All right, let me give you
a little Girlfriend 101.
264
00:15:22,421 --> 00:15:24,756
Usually the first move is you withhold sex...
265
00:15:24,924 --> 00:15:27,592
...but that will work better
after Sheldon hits puberty.
266
00:15:28,218 --> 00:15:33,139
So I'd say give him the silent treatment.
267
00:15:33,557 --> 00:15:35,767
- No, he loves that.
- Hmm.
268
00:15:35,935 --> 00:15:38,811
Our record for sitting in a room together
and not speaking...
269
00:15:39,021 --> 00:15:42,649
...is six and a half hours.
He said it was a magical evening.
270
00:15:43,067 --> 00:15:45,902
All right, we're gonna have
to go with an oldie but goodie:
271
00:15:46,070 --> 00:15:49,447
- Making a scene.
- I don't think I'd be good at that.
272
00:15:49,615 --> 00:15:51,616
Ah. You're lucky to have me.
Back in Omaha...
273
00:15:51,784 --> 00:15:55,161
...there are two restaurants
I'm not allowed into. Both Chili's.
274
00:15:58,832 --> 00:16:01,793
Bernadette, your character
is the healer in our group.
275
00:16:01,961 --> 00:16:04,420
In charge of healing all of us,
not just Howard.
276
00:16:04,588 --> 00:16:08,841
Can't help it.
My Howie-wowie has an owie. Ha, ha.
277
00:16:10,761 --> 00:16:14,806
That is the most sickeningly sweet thing
I have ever experienced.
278
00:16:14,974 --> 00:16:18,768
And I am sipping Kool-Aid
through a Red Vine.
279
00:16:21,313 --> 00:16:25,483
Sheldon, I've got a bone to pick with you,
and I'll do it in front of all your friends.
280
00:16:25,651 --> 00:16:28,486
Yeah, you pick that bone.
You pick that bone clean.
281
00:16:29,154 --> 00:16:31,489
I'm gonna publicly shame you
and then sit back...
282
00:16:31,657 --> 00:16:34,325
...as societal pressure compels you
to modify your behavior.
283
00:16:34,493 --> 00:16:36,703
Oh, burn!
284
00:16:38,080 --> 00:16:40,832
If you don't start treating me better,
I'm leaving you...
285
00:16:41,000 --> 00:16:43,209
...for a miniature-horse breeder
named Armin.
286
00:16:45,295 --> 00:16:47,797
- Armin who?
- Armin... Damn it.
287
00:16:51,176 --> 00:16:55,179
Sheldon, she wanted to show you off to
her family and you stood her up, okay?
288
00:16:55,597 --> 00:16:57,807
I mean, look at this adorable,
smushy face.
289
00:16:57,975 --> 00:17:00,977
Smush, smush, smush.
290
00:17:01,353 --> 00:17:05,690
- You're hurting me.
- No, Sheldon hurt you.
291
00:17:05,858 --> 00:17:08,401
- Before. Now it's you.
- Oh.
292
00:17:09,987 --> 00:17:12,030
I think I understand.
293
00:17:12,531 --> 00:17:16,200
You're the one person who can say
Sheldon Cooper is your boyfriend.
294
00:17:16,368 --> 00:17:20,204
But that rings hollow if you can't
lord him over others in the flesh.
295
00:17:22,041 --> 00:17:26,544
I forget what I bring to the party
and what I take away when I leave.
296
00:17:27,129 --> 00:17:32,258
Please accept these valuable
Cooper Coupons...
297
00:17:34,011 --> 00:17:36,846
- ...as restitution.
- She doesn't want your stupid coupons...
298
00:17:37,014 --> 00:17:40,391
The Science Center? Redeeming. Let's go.
299
00:17:42,227 --> 00:17:46,272
Well played, Amy Farrah Fowler.
Let me get my coat.
300
00:17:46,440 --> 00:17:47,482
(WHIP CRACKS ON PHONE)
301
00:17:47,649 --> 00:17:49,192
Oh, grow up, Leonard.
302
00:17:50,861 --> 00:17:53,154
Excuse me, I have something to say.
303
00:17:54,907 --> 00:17:59,035
None of you may realize it, but I was very
much looking forward to this weekend.
304
00:17:59,745 --> 00:18:02,789
It was gonna be like the old days.
The four of us hanging out...
305
00:18:02,956 --> 00:18:06,042
...playing video games,
before you guys all got girlfriends.
306
00:18:06,877 --> 00:18:10,755
Do you have any idea what it's like
to be the only one without a girlfriend?
307
00:18:10,923 --> 00:18:12,256
Even if I get one someday...
308
00:18:12,424 --> 00:18:16,552
...I'll still be the guy who got a girl
after Sheldon Cooper!
309
00:18:21,600 --> 00:18:24,769
And that's how a girl makes a scene.
310
00:18:29,274 --> 00:18:31,651
I'm sorry. You're right.
You deserve your weekend.
311
00:18:31,819 --> 00:18:34,487
- Come on, Amy, let's go.
- What about the Science Center?
312
00:18:34,696 --> 00:18:37,615
Oh, I'll let you hold my hair
while I throw up.
313
00:18:39,118 --> 00:18:40,451
Rain check.
314
00:18:41,912 --> 00:18:44,288
- I'm gonna go too.
- I'll miss you.
315
00:18:44,456 --> 00:18:46,582
- I'll miss you.
- But I'll miss you more.
316
00:18:46,750 --> 00:18:48,793
- No, I'll miss you...
- Just leave.
317
00:18:52,047 --> 00:18:55,842
Ahh. Okay, now,
this is the way it's supposed to be.
318
00:18:56,009 --> 00:18:58,136
Men together, fighting the forces of evil.
319
00:18:58,595 --> 00:19:00,221
HOWARD: All right.
- Hear, hear.
320
00:19:01,223 --> 00:19:02,640
Ah.
321
00:19:02,808 --> 00:19:05,017
Can't believe this is only 64 calories.
322
00:19:18,323 --> 00:19:19,866
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
323
00:19:20,033 --> 00:19:23,327
MRS. WOLOWITZ: Howard Joel Wolowitz,
I've been worried sick for two days...
324
00:19:23,495 --> 00:19:25,830
...and I know you turned off your phone!
325
00:19:28,584 --> 00:19:32,003
You open up this door right now,
because I've had it up to here!
326
00:19:32,171 --> 00:19:34,338
I have been to the morgue
and the hospital...
327
00:19:34,548 --> 00:19:38,926
...and I've spent the last half-hour
walking up these farkakte stairs!
328
00:19:42,055 --> 00:19:44,432
That's my ride. Gotta go, heh.
329
00:19:46,685 --> 00:19:48,352
(WHIP CRACKS ON PHONE)
28770
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