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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 2 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 3 00:00:28,761 --> 00:00:31,180 Welcome to Hazzard County. 4 00:00:31,347 --> 00:00:35,017 A little corner of the world where everyone knows everyone else... 5 00:00:35,184 --> 00:00:38,563 ... and people are never too busy to stop and say howdy. 6 00:00:38,729 --> 00:00:42,900 Shoot, some folks even say this is where the apple pie was invented. 7 00:00:44,068 --> 00:00:49,198 Yep, basically everything down here moves a little bit slower... 8 00:00:49,532 --> 00:00:55,037 ... unless, of course, your last name is Duke. 9 00:01:14,432 --> 00:01:16,476 Man, the General's in good shape. 10 00:01:16,642 --> 00:01:21,689 Bo, it's happy hour at The Boar's Nest, and we still got two deliveries to make. 11 00:01:21,856 --> 00:01:26,194 It's all one big happy hour, Luke. Besides, we're taking a shortcut. 12 00:01:45,254 --> 00:01:47,048 Hi, Luke. 13 00:01:48,508 --> 00:01:51,511 - I got this one. - You sure that's a good idea, cuz? 14 00:01:51,677 --> 00:01:53,596 It's a great idea. Come on. 15 00:01:57,391 --> 00:01:58,976 Hey, Laurie. 16 00:01:59,185 --> 00:02:02,021 - You here to make your delivery? - Well, I was hoping to. 17 00:02:02,188 --> 00:02:04,482 Luke, remember last time. 18 00:02:04,690 --> 00:02:06,359 Don't worry about it, cuz. 19 00:02:06,526 --> 00:02:09,028 It's okay, Bo. Pa ain't here. 20 00:02:09,195 --> 00:02:12,240 See, Bo? Pa ain't here. 21 00:02:14,117 --> 00:02:16,411 - Hi. - Hi. 22 00:02:18,621 --> 00:02:20,206 Play hard to get, little buddy. 23 00:02:32,135 --> 00:02:33,886 Listen and learn, General. 24 00:02:34,053 --> 00:02:38,015 And now, side two of the Al Unser, Jr. story: 25 00:02:38,224 --> 00:02:43,229 No Questions, Only Unsers, as read by Laurence Fishburne. 26 00:02:43,396 --> 00:02:45,481 "I'm too old for this shit." 27 00:02:45,648 --> 00:02:48,484 That's what I was thinking as I turned into the final lap... 28 00:02:48,651 --> 00:02:51,195 ... running fourth at Talladega. 29 00:02:51,404 --> 00:02:54,824 But then it hit me. Life is like a racetrack. 30 00:02:55,032 --> 00:02:57,660 You gotta keep going round and round. 31 00:02:57,827 --> 00:03:01,748 - That is so true. - Sure, sometimes you crash and burn. 32 00:03:01,914 --> 00:03:05,334 But if you don't make the turn, you ain't never gonna learn. 33 00:03:05,752 --> 00:03:10,590 So I gripped the wheel tighter, checked my gauges, and made my move. 34 00:03:10,757 --> 00:03:14,177 Make my move. Give you my move. Make it, mother... 35 00:03:14,385 --> 00:03:16,471 - Jesus Christ! - Howdy, Bo. 36 00:03:16,637 --> 00:03:20,558 Hey, Mr. Pullman. I nearly shit myself. 37 00:03:20,933 --> 00:03:22,894 - How you doing, sir? - Oh, I'm fine. 38 00:03:23,060 --> 00:03:25,897 You ready for that big Hazzard Rally this weekend? 39 00:03:26,063 --> 00:03:29,108 Yeah, I got him all tuned up. Right, General? 40 00:03:29,400 --> 00:03:31,402 How many times you won that, anyway? 41 00:03:31,611 --> 00:03:34,238 - Four in a row, sir. - Four in a row. 42 00:03:34,447 --> 00:03:38,743 That's good. Billy Prickett won it four in a row, and look what he's doing today. 43 00:03:39,452 --> 00:03:41,829 - Hey, you been hunting? - Yes, sir. 44 00:03:41,996 --> 00:03:44,540 Yeah, I been using those new whammy shells. 45 00:03:44,707 --> 00:03:48,044 They scatter less for when you really wanna blow a hole in something. 46 00:03:50,922 --> 00:03:53,591 - Cool. Guns. - Yeah. 47 00:03:55,134 --> 00:03:57,678 Are you delivering all by yourself today? 48 00:03:57,845 --> 00:03:59,847 Oh, no. I never travel alone, sir. 49 00:04:00,014 --> 00:04:02,391 I like to think I travel with the man upstairs. 50 00:04:03,643 --> 00:04:05,103 You know, Jesus. 51 00:04:06,771 --> 00:04:09,315 You know, I like that attitude. 52 00:04:09,482 --> 00:04:11,776 I'm gonna look around and find a boy like you... 53 00:04:11,984 --> 00:04:14,487 ...to date my daughter, Laurie, pretty soon. 54 00:04:14,654 --> 00:04:17,657 Because she's getting curious about boys, you know. 55 00:04:17,824 --> 00:04:19,117 Yeah. 56 00:04:19,325 --> 00:04:21,994 Oh, you're talking about sex, right? 57 00:04:22,495 --> 00:04:25,957 I just wanna keep that sorry cousin of yours away from her. 58 00:04:26,124 --> 00:04:29,794 The way he looks at her galls me. You know what I mean? 59 00:04:31,254 --> 00:04:33,714 You get back here right now, you son of a bitch. 60 00:04:33,881 --> 00:04:35,591 Get back here. 61 00:04:35,758 --> 00:04:38,136 Luke! Luke! 62 00:04:38,302 --> 00:04:41,472 - Why you running, you chickenshit? - Goddamn Dukes. 63 00:04:41,639 --> 00:04:43,266 You get the hell off my sister. 64 00:04:43,433 --> 00:04:45,226 - Jimmy! - Oh, shit. 65 00:04:45,393 --> 00:04:48,354 Damn you, Luke! You get back in the house! 66 00:04:48,521 --> 00:04:50,898 - Go, Bo, go! - Luke, wait! 67 00:04:51,065 --> 00:04:53,693 - Put on a shirt! - Come on, come on, come on. 68 00:04:53,860 --> 00:04:55,820 I forgot about the brother. Go! 69 00:05:00,324 --> 00:05:01,784 So happy hour? 70 00:05:01,993 --> 00:05:04,829 - You're gonna get us shot someday. - Not today. 71 00:05:04,996 --> 00:05:07,498 Not with you driving the getaway car. 72 00:05:09,876 --> 00:05:12,336 - So how was it? - It's never bad. 73 00:05:15,631 --> 00:05:17,300 Son of a bitch. 74 00:05:18,760 --> 00:05:20,762 Here, load up with these whammy shells. 75 00:05:20,928 --> 00:05:23,222 They'll blow a hole through an elephant's ass. 76 00:05:23,723 --> 00:05:25,516 Look out. 77 00:05:30,021 --> 00:05:32,315 Oh, goddamn it! You're gonna replace that. 78 00:05:34,275 --> 00:05:36,360 - What's he using? - You don't wanna know. 79 00:05:36,569 --> 00:05:39,155 Dadgum it, you just assassinated a tree. 80 00:05:39,322 --> 00:05:40,865 Got a big kick to it. 81 00:05:41,074 --> 00:05:43,951 Don't you worry. They can't touch the General. Come on, boy. 82 00:05:51,375 --> 00:05:53,211 You missed, Jimmy! 83 00:05:53,377 --> 00:05:57,590 Can't you shoot straight? Don't point that thing at me, you chucklehead. 84 00:05:57,757 --> 00:06:00,384 Don't call me a chucklehead. I ain't a chucklehead. 85 00:06:01,094 --> 00:06:03,596 Hey! Get that gun out of the wheel! 86 00:06:04,263 --> 00:06:06,641 What are you doing? Hey. Hey. What the hell? 87 00:06:07,058 --> 00:06:08,726 - Goddamn it. - I'm sorry, Daddy. 88 00:06:08,893 --> 00:06:10,770 Let's go after them. 89 00:06:12,688 --> 00:06:15,900 - Bo, did you see that sign? - I can read! 90 00:06:16,109 --> 00:06:18,194 This is how you planned on losing them? 91 00:06:18,361 --> 00:06:19,862 You ain't scared, are you? 92 00:06:20,029 --> 00:06:23,074 Scared? Hell, no. I just don't wanna hear it from Uncle Jesse... 93 00:06:23,241 --> 00:06:25,493 ...when you break his bottles of shine. 94 00:06:25,660 --> 00:06:28,287 I bet you the old phone book I don't break a bottle. 95 00:06:28,454 --> 00:06:30,248 Phone book it is. 96 00:06:30,456 --> 00:06:34,085 Daddy, you get me close, and I'll put a bullet in this son of a bitch. 97 00:06:36,838 --> 00:06:39,132 Goddamn it, Jimmy! 98 00:06:39,298 --> 00:06:42,844 Who says I can't shoot? Daddy? Daddy! 99 00:07:03,281 --> 00:07:06,159 Bo and Luke Duke. 100 00:07:06,325 --> 00:07:08,745 Cousins closer than brothers. 101 00:07:08,911 --> 00:07:11,122 Both big-hearted, strong-willed... 102 00:07:11,330 --> 00:07:14,709 ... and restless as a couple of cats thrown into a swimming hole. 103 00:07:41,778 --> 00:07:43,237 Nice driving, cuz. 104 00:07:47,325 --> 00:07:48,785 What? 105 00:07:52,371 --> 00:07:55,792 - I won the bet, you son of a bitch. - Oh, come on. 106 00:07:56,000 --> 00:07:58,961 I didn't break any bottles, so I won the bet. 107 00:08:03,174 --> 00:08:06,302 - I was just joking about the bet. - Oh, you were joking? 108 00:08:06,469 --> 00:08:08,513 - Yeah. - Still getting the phone book, though. 109 00:08:08,721 --> 00:08:12,558 - Come on, double or nothing. - Nope. Time to pay your debt, buddy. 110 00:08:13,726 --> 00:08:15,812 Which side you want, right side or left? 111 00:08:17,522 --> 00:08:19,565 Right. 112 00:08:19,732 --> 00:08:21,484 Did I hear one of your teeth break? 113 00:08:21,651 --> 00:08:24,695 I don't remember the Hazzard phone book being that thick. 114 00:08:24,946 --> 00:08:27,156 This is Atlanta. 115 00:08:37,208 --> 00:08:41,337 Bet was over. I can't believe that happened. I mean, the bet was over. 116 00:08:41,504 --> 00:08:43,381 - What are you doing? - Where you want it? 117 00:08:44,799 --> 00:08:47,260 - Oh, man. - Where you want it? 118 00:08:47,427 --> 00:08:48,845 Left. 119 00:08:50,930 --> 00:08:52,598 That was a good one. 120 00:08:56,269 --> 00:08:59,731 Right in the ball sack. God. 121 00:09:00,857 --> 00:09:03,401 In case of dehydration. 122 00:09:09,282 --> 00:09:11,409 That'll put lead in your pencil. 123 00:09:15,788 --> 00:09:19,125 - Man, I'm already tired of walking. - You could use a little exercise. 124 00:09:19,292 --> 00:09:21,461 Them jeans of yours look tighter than Daisy's. 125 00:09:21,627 --> 00:09:25,047 Oh, yeah? I bet you a cold beer I could beat you to The Boar's Nest. 126 00:09:25,214 --> 00:09:27,216 That's five miles. 127 00:09:36,017 --> 00:09:38,978 I'm coming! I'm coming! 128 00:09:44,275 --> 00:09:45,943 Face! 129 00:09:51,866 --> 00:09:53,826 He came back. 130 00:09:56,037 --> 00:09:58,081 What's Billy Prickett doing here? 131 00:09:58,247 --> 00:10:00,333 Well, it looks like he's here for the race. 132 00:10:02,752 --> 00:10:06,422 Man, those tires alone are worth more than the General Lee. 133 00:10:07,507 --> 00:10:11,135 My, oh, my. Look at that. Billy Prickett's car, huh? 134 00:10:11,552 --> 00:10:13,721 What's new in law enforcement, Enos? 135 00:10:13,888 --> 00:10:17,600 - They make you lieutenant yet? - Hell, you know that'll never happen. 136 00:10:17,767 --> 00:10:20,603 Maybe one of these days you'll wise up and come work for us. 137 00:10:20,770 --> 00:10:22,563 We could use a man like you. 138 00:10:22,730 --> 00:10:26,401 I don't know. I don't think it's a good time to be in the moonshine business. 139 00:10:26,567 --> 00:10:29,612 Moonshine business? We ain't in the moonshining business. 140 00:10:31,280 --> 00:10:36,119 But if someone were in the moonshining business, why would it be a bad time? 141 00:10:36,285 --> 00:10:39,497 Now, Luke, you know I can't say anything. Boss Hogg'll tan my hide. 142 00:10:39,664 --> 00:10:41,124 He spanks you? 143 00:10:41,499 --> 00:10:43,835 Hey, Dil, what do you want? We just ordered. 144 00:10:44,001 --> 00:10:46,921 By the looks of this place, I'll take two bottles of Pepto... 145 00:10:47,088 --> 00:10:49,507 ...and a shot of penicillin, right? 146 00:10:59,434 --> 00:11:01,394 Jesus, mother of Mary. 147 00:11:04,439 --> 00:11:06,941 Look away, man. Trust me, look away. 148 00:11:07,108 --> 00:11:09,569 Don't worry about it. I won't hurt her. 149 00:11:09,736 --> 00:11:13,364 There ain't nobody in this bar concerned about you hurting her. 150 00:11:13,573 --> 00:11:15,283 All right, all right. 151 00:11:19,996 --> 00:11:22,165 Y'all ready to order? 152 00:11:25,084 --> 00:11:27,211 You better be reading my nametag, friend. 153 00:11:27,420 --> 00:11:31,799 I am, I am. I noticed your initials were double D. 154 00:11:33,760 --> 00:11:36,596 - Oh, sweet Jesus. - I'll give you one more chance. 155 00:11:36,763 --> 00:11:39,891 You wanna order, or you wanna sit around and make stupid jokes? 156 00:11:40,057 --> 00:11:42,351 Ain't gotta get fussy. We're having a good time. 157 00:11:42,518 --> 00:11:45,396 I'll tell you what, I'll order. We don't want no problems. 158 00:11:45,563 --> 00:11:47,774 Let's see... 159 00:11:48,775 --> 00:11:50,610 Do those legs come over easy? 160 00:11:50,902 --> 00:11:52,820 Oh, my God. 161 00:11:55,490 --> 00:11:58,993 - How about the special, sir? - Dil Driscoll! 162 00:11:59,243 --> 00:12:02,914 You stop bothering that nice girl and pick on somebody your own size. 163 00:12:03,122 --> 00:12:05,249 - Billy Prickett. - Hey, it's Billy Prickett! 164 00:12:06,626 --> 00:12:08,294 - Welcome home, boy. - You old mule. 165 00:12:08,920 --> 00:12:11,214 Hey. 166 00:12:13,132 --> 00:12:15,218 Why don't you cool off, Dil? 167 00:12:16,969 --> 00:12:19,972 - Come on, boy. Let's get out of here. - My, my, my. 168 00:12:20,139 --> 00:12:24,727 Holy hell, Luke. There he is, right there. That's Billy Prickett. 169 00:12:24,894 --> 00:12:26,437 Should I buy him a drink? 170 00:12:26,604 --> 00:12:29,232 Maybe you should buy him flowers and chocolates. 171 00:12:29,399 --> 00:12:33,528 Give me a Miller. Make it a Löwenbräu. 172 00:12:34,695 --> 00:12:36,697 How you doing? 173 00:12:36,864 --> 00:12:40,034 Hey, Billy Prickett. Welcome back to Hazzard. 174 00:12:42,245 --> 00:12:45,581 See, boys, I told you all the waitresses in this place was dog ugly. 175 00:12:46,958 --> 00:12:49,710 - Man. - I'm only fooling with you. 176 00:12:49,877 --> 00:12:51,462 Fellas, this is Bo Duke. 177 00:12:51,629 --> 00:12:55,675 Bo is looking to break my Hazzard Rally record. What is it now, four in a row? 178 00:12:56,008 --> 00:12:57,760 Yeah, well... 179 00:12:57,927 --> 00:13:04,016 All streaks must come to an end, Bo. I'm calling this one "the drive for five." 180 00:13:04,183 --> 00:13:07,937 - Well, I'm looking forward to the race. - Hey, Dil! 181 00:13:08,104 --> 00:13:10,356 This is the boy who's trying to break my record. 182 00:13:10,523 --> 00:13:13,776 Oh, really? I'm Dil Driscoll, crew chief. 183 00:13:13,943 --> 00:13:15,361 - Bo-Bo, have a seat. - Really? 184 00:13:17,447 --> 00:13:20,491 So, Billy, what's it like being in the circuit? 185 00:13:20,658 --> 00:13:22,660 - Well... - Hey, Billy, join me for a drink? 186 00:13:22,869 --> 00:13:24,454 Oh, well, you sweet little thing. 187 00:13:24,620 --> 00:13:27,790 Fellas, I'm awfully thirsty all of a sudden. 188 00:13:27,957 --> 00:13:30,376 Bo-Bo, may the best man win. 189 00:13:31,753 --> 00:13:33,254 John, another round! 190 00:13:33,421 --> 00:13:37,341 So, Bo, what's the story on that little pistol over there? 191 00:13:37,592 --> 00:13:40,720 Because she gave me a ride earlier. 192 00:13:41,179 --> 00:13:43,765 Well, actually, she's my cousin. 193 00:13:43,931 --> 00:13:46,559 Oh, really? You hitting that? 194 00:13:47,393 --> 00:13:50,980 - She's my cousin. - Hopefully you're kissing cousins, right? 195 00:13:52,940 --> 00:13:55,902 - Come again? - Son, all I'm really trying to ask you... 196 00:13:56,069 --> 00:13:59,197 ...is if you shuck her corn. 197 00:14:03,034 --> 00:14:09,082 Now, there are certain things you just don't say to a Duke about another Duke. 198 00:14:13,503 --> 00:14:15,213 I'll shuck your corn! 199 00:14:17,715 --> 00:14:19,175 Excuse me a second. 200 00:14:19,342 --> 00:14:21,052 Pick him up! Pick him up! 201 00:14:22,929 --> 00:14:25,223 Hey, hey. Can I get in on this? 202 00:14:25,389 --> 00:14:26,641 - Yeah. - Sure. 203 00:14:34,357 --> 00:14:35,900 Oh, buddy. 204 00:14:38,361 --> 00:14:39,862 Here we go. 205 00:14:41,989 --> 00:14:44,409 Fifty bucks on the Dukes! 206 00:14:58,297 --> 00:15:00,800 - That makes two, Luke! - Attaboy! 207 00:15:08,975 --> 00:15:11,144 Hey, Billy Prickett! 208 00:15:11,394 --> 00:15:13,271 Careful, Bo-Bo. 209 00:15:17,024 --> 00:15:18,609 Don't hit him. That's A.J. Foyt! 210 00:15:18,776 --> 00:15:20,611 - Really? - The fourth! 211 00:15:47,597 --> 00:15:50,266 - Hey, can I hit this guy? - Kill them all! 212 00:15:53,144 --> 00:15:55,313 - The ribs are greasy. - The beans are cold. 213 00:16:03,446 --> 00:16:06,574 Sheriff Rosco P. Coltrane. 214 00:16:06,741 --> 00:16:10,411 Closest thing to law enforcement in Hazzard County. 215 00:16:10,578 --> 00:16:14,582 Rosco's been after the Duke boys since they started walking. 216 00:16:14,749 --> 00:16:17,376 Of course, some people say the boys' first steps... 217 00:16:17,543 --> 00:16:21,964 ... landed right on the sheriff's last nerve. 218 00:16:36,145 --> 00:16:39,315 Dukes. Just once you two ought to try leaving a place... 219 00:16:39,482 --> 00:16:42,276 ...in better shape than it was when you walked in. 220 00:16:42,443 --> 00:16:47,281 Oh, I think your boss can afford to replace a few broken beer mugs. 221 00:16:47,448 --> 00:16:50,410 I heard there was a little incident earlier... 222 00:16:50,576 --> 00:16:55,790 ...concerning a certain crappy orange hot rod out at the Miller farm. 223 00:16:56,207 --> 00:16:58,835 Y'all really upset some of them construction boys. 224 00:16:59,085 --> 00:17:02,964 When I got there, they were not being gentle with your beloved piece of crap. 225 00:17:04,257 --> 00:17:06,426 What'd you do, Rosco? 226 00:17:06,592 --> 00:17:10,555 I can't say she's gonna be in real good racing shape for the rally this weekend. 227 00:17:16,018 --> 00:17:18,187 You watch yourself, hillbilly boy. 228 00:17:18,688 --> 00:17:22,608 Come on, boys. My shift's over. I'll take you over to Cooter's. 229 00:17:22,775 --> 00:17:24,569 Come on. 230 00:17:48,092 --> 00:17:50,511 Jefferson Davis Hogg... 231 00:17:50,678 --> 00:17:53,931 ... the meanest man in Hazzard County. 232 00:17:54,140 --> 00:17:58,770 He's canny as a fox, tough as a badger... 233 00:17:59,145 --> 00:18:03,399 ... and crooked as a hillbilly's smile. 234 00:18:05,109 --> 00:18:07,111 Well, Rosco. 235 00:18:09,697 --> 00:18:13,659 I see you have redecorated. 236 00:18:13,826 --> 00:18:16,871 Interesting style. What do you call it? 237 00:18:17,038 --> 00:18:20,583 - Well, sir, the Dukes... - The Dukes. 238 00:18:20,750 --> 00:18:22,877 I had a feeling. 239 00:18:28,633 --> 00:18:32,345 I've got some important things happening here this weekend. 240 00:18:32,512 --> 00:18:36,140 - Yes, sir. - Are you gonna take care of the Dukes... 241 00:18:36,349 --> 00:18:39,769 ...or am I gonna have to make other plans? 242 00:18:39,936 --> 00:18:42,730 I'm on top of it, Boss. 243 00:18:42,897 --> 00:18:45,441 That's what I'm afraid of. 244 00:18:48,528 --> 00:18:50,071 - You ready? - Is it bad? 245 00:18:50,238 --> 00:18:51,989 Not good. 246 00:18:55,701 --> 00:18:58,830 Hell, this is worse than the time you sunk it in the Tipton Swamp. 247 00:19:02,166 --> 00:19:04,335 Mostly cosmetic damage, right, Cooter? 248 00:19:06,045 --> 00:19:07,547 - Mostly. - Yeah. 249 00:19:07,713 --> 00:19:12,301 - He's gonna be ready for the race, right? - Race? Come on, Bo. 250 00:19:12,468 --> 00:19:14,971 I mean, the General doesn't race. 251 00:19:15,138 --> 00:19:17,807 The General erases the competition. 252 00:19:36,951 --> 00:19:38,286 Who does this? 253 00:19:40,913 --> 00:19:45,334 It would make a nice hat or a slipper. 254 00:19:45,501 --> 00:19:49,046 You know what? Just leave the General here with me. I'll see if I can fix... 255 00:19:49,255 --> 00:19:52,717 I'll have it up running in no time. Meanwhile, you boys take my truck. 256 00:19:54,177 --> 00:19:55,887 What if you need to tow somebody? 257 00:19:56,053 --> 00:19:59,682 If I can't "toe" them, I'll just finger them. You know what I mean? 258 00:20:04,562 --> 00:20:10,485 Close one. Even shell-shocked, he's a better driver than you are. 259 00:20:10,651 --> 00:20:12,653 - Thanks, Cooter. - Yeah. 260 00:20:17,241 --> 00:20:18,785 Chin up. 261 00:20:24,415 --> 00:20:26,501 Daisy? 262 00:20:26,667 --> 00:20:28,753 Jesse L. Duke. 263 00:20:28,961 --> 00:20:31,756 - Uncle Jesse to you. - Daisy. 264 00:20:31,923 --> 00:20:34,884 Now, Jesse's been two places in his life: 265 00:20:35,051 --> 00:20:37,345 Hazzard County and Korea. 266 00:20:37,512 --> 00:20:39,931 - Daisy? - I'm in here. 267 00:20:40,098 --> 00:20:42,266 - As far as he's concerned... - Where are you? 268 00:20:42,433 --> 00:20:43,768 I'm in the shower. 269 00:20:43,935 --> 00:20:45,395 - that's one place too many. 270 00:20:45,603 --> 00:20:47,355 Ready or not, here I come. 271 00:20:55,488 --> 00:20:58,616 - How's it looking, good looking? - Well, I fixed the vapor coils... 272 00:20:58,825 --> 00:21:02,245 ...but the boiler's still slow. You been running this around the clock? 273 00:21:02,453 --> 00:21:06,082 Them boys break more bottles than they deliver. Eight cases this month. 274 00:21:06,332 --> 00:21:09,252 Wonder where in the hell they are, anyway. 275 00:21:11,212 --> 00:21:13,256 It'll make you feel lots better. 276 00:21:15,842 --> 00:21:19,095 - Light the son of a bitch. - All right. 277 00:21:24,183 --> 00:21:26,144 I feel good. 278 00:21:26,310 --> 00:21:29,147 All right, y'all, knock off the grab-assing over there. 279 00:21:29,439 --> 00:21:31,399 What's going on, Uncle Jesse? 280 00:21:31,566 --> 00:21:34,777 Guy come out of an antique shop carrying a big grandfather's clock. 281 00:21:34,944 --> 00:21:36,946 Bumped into this drunk, broke the clock. 282 00:21:37,113 --> 00:21:39,240 Guy said, "Why don't you watch where you're going." 283 00:21:39,407 --> 00:21:42,785 The drunk says, "Why don't you carry a wristwatch like everybody else." 284 00:21:44,203 --> 00:21:46,664 Know what happens when you give a politician Viagra? 285 00:21:46,956 --> 00:21:48,541 - No. - He gets taller. 286 00:21:49,751 --> 00:21:51,377 Here's another one for you. 287 00:21:51,544 --> 00:21:54,881 How many Dukes does it take to screw up a moonshine delivery? 288 00:21:55,047 --> 00:21:57,550 Oh, yes, sorry about that, Uncle Jesse. We... 289 00:22:04,348 --> 00:22:05,641 Is that Rosco? 290 00:22:05,933 --> 00:22:08,686 Wonder what that fat sack of shit wants. 291 00:22:09,437 --> 00:22:10,897 Come on. 292 00:22:12,398 --> 00:22:16,694 We can skip the "Hi, how are you's." I'm here on official police business. 293 00:22:16,903 --> 00:22:19,030 Right here, sheriff. 294 00:22:21,949 --> 00:22:23,785 Oh, that's horseshit. You planted that. 295 00:22:28,790 --> 00:22:32,752 "By the power vested in me by the County of Hazzard, Georgia... 296 00:22:32,919 --> 00:22:35,004 ...I hereby seize this property... 297 00:22:35,171 --> 00:22:38,758 ...for the crime of producing and distributing moonshine." 298 00:22:40,176 --> 00:22:42,970 Now, Jesse, we can do this the easy way... 299 00:22:43,137 --> 00:22:45,306 ...or, of course... 300 00:22:47,683 --> 00:22:49,143 ...there's that other way. 301 00:22:49,310 --> 00:22:52,271 - Let's try the that other way first. - Now, hold on. Wait. 302 00:22:52,438 --> 00:22:54,899 Only way I'm leaving this farm is in a wooden box. 303 00:22:55,108 --> 00:22:56,984 Well... 304 00:22:57,985 --> 00:23:00,321 Hi, Dukes. 305 00:23:02,198 --> 00:23:03,699 Hi. 306 00:23:04,867 --> 00:23:06,202 Well, now. 307 00:23:07,203 --> 00:23:08,704 Lookie there. 308 00:23:09,414 --> 00:23:14,043 Moonshining. What a shame, what a shame. 309 00:23:14,210 --> 00:23:17,380 - That ain't ours, Boss. - Really? 310 00:23:17,547 --> 00:23:19,882 You're out of here. 311 00:23:20,049 --> 00:23:22,301 This land ain't yours anymore. 312 00:23:22,468 --> 00:23:24,512 You're gonna have to live somewhere else... 313 00:23:24,679 --> 00:23:27,348 ...and you're never gonna moonshine... - Why, you prick! 314 00:23:27,515 --> 00:23:32,645 Watch out. I got my dog here, and I ain't fed him, and he's real hungry. 315 00:23:33,312 --> 00:23:36,232 Easy, Jesse. Not now. 316 00:23:39,652 --> 00:23:42,780 You boys done started a fight you can't win. 317 00:23:49,620 --> 00:23:53,416 Well, you have my sympathy. Y'all take care, now. 318 00:23:58,838 --> 00:24:01,632 - Should've busted a cap in his ass. - Hell, yeah. 319 00:24:01,799 --> 00:24:03,926 Hey, easy now, boys. 320 00:24:04,093 --> 00:24:07,096 Thanks for taking us in, Pauline. We really appreciate it. 321 00:24:07,305 --> 00:24:09,098 Oh, honey, it is my pleasure. 322 00:24:09,265 --> 00:24:13,269 I left three toes in Korea for this country, and this is the thanks I get. 323 00:24:13,436 --> 00:24:15,938 I don't understand how they could just take your farm. 324 00:24:16,147 --> 00:24:18,024 They planted a still in our barn. 325 00:24:18,191 --> 00:24:22,945 They planted a still? Now, why would they need to plant a still? 326 00:24:23,112 --> 00:24:26,115 Because they're too damn dumb to find our real one. 327 00:24:26,407 --> 00:24:30,078 I was waiting on old Bill Miller up at the truck stop last night. 328 00:24:30,244 --> 00:24:34,540 He said Boss' men seized his land for some trumped-up charge too. 329 00:24:34,957 --> 00:24:38,920 Maybe it's got to do with all that construction equipment up at the Millers'. 330 00:24:39,087 --> 00:24:41,547 You wanna go up there and take a second look? 331 00:24:41,714 --> 00:24:43,633 Oh, I don't know, boys. 332 00:24:43,800 --> 00:24:45,343 Oh, now, Pauline. 333 00:24:47,553 --> 00:24:50,515 Don't worry, Uncle Jesse. We're gonna take care of it. 334 00:24:51,140 --> 00:24:53,309 You know what's gonna happen, don't you? 335 00:24:53,476 --> 00:24:56,521 Those two are gonna get themselves in trouble, end up in jail... 336 00:24:56,687 --> 00:24:59,190 ...and I'm gonna have to shake my ass to get them out. 337 00:24:59,399 --> 00:25:01,526 That's why we love you, honey. 338 00:25:05,696 --> 00:25:09,242 - Oh, goddamn it. - Well, well, well. 339 00:25:10,576 --> 00:25:12,703 What the hell do you think you're doing? 340 00:25:12,912 --> 00:25:15,540 What's it look like? I'm building a doomsday machine... 341 00:25:15,706 --> 00:25:18,042 ...gonna aim it right up your heinie hole. 342 00:25:18,334 --> 00:25:20,545 You stupid enough to think you can fix this? 343 00:25:20,753 --> 00:25:23,131 - I'm fixing to fix it. - Oh, you fixing to fix it. 344 00:25:23,297 --> 00:25:26,259 You couldn't fix an election if your brother was the governor. 345 00:25:26,551 --> 00:25:28,511 What do you want, Rosco? 346 00:25:28,719 --> 00:25:33,850 This here vehicle, it was used in the illegal transportation of moonshine. 347 00:25:34,016 --> 00:25:35,601 Boss wants it impounded. 348 00:25:35,768 --> 00:25:38,604 It ain't running right now, and my tow truck ain't here... 349 00:25:38,771 --> 00:25:40,690 ...so unless you stick it up your ass... 350 00:25:40,857 --> 00:25:43,401 Hey, one way or another, grease monkey... 351 00:25:43,568 --> 00:25:46,529 ...tomorrow I'm auctioning off this hunk of junk. 352 00:25:46,738 --> 00:25:49,157 So y'all have a good night, now, okay? 353 00:25:52,410 --> 00:25:56,539 I got two words for you: soap and water. 354 00:25:57,915 --> 00:26:00,084 That's three words. 355 00:26:00,251 --> 00:26:02,044 Stupid. 356 00:26:09,260 --> 00:26:10,928 Hey, man, this is Cooter. 357 00:26:11,137 --> 00:26:14,640 Round up the fellas. I got a job for them. 358 00:26:18,478 --> 00:26:20,730 Lot of equipment there for an abandoned farm. 359 00:26:20,897 --> 00:26:24,317 Yeah, and that fence went up pretty quick too, huh? 360 00:26:24,734 --> 00:26:27,737 - Let's go ditch the truck. - All right. 361 00:26:52,970 --> 00:26:55,932 Well, ain't that cute, a man taking his pig for a walk. 362 00:27:00,937 --> 00:27:02,355 Come on. 363 00:27:10,988 --> 00:27:12,782 What now? 364 00:27:19,205 --> 00:27:21,165 Lookie here, Bo. 365 00:27:22,708 --> 00:27:26,504 He's got our farm marked, right next to the Millers' and the Robinsons'. 366 00:27:27,839 --> 00:27:31,008 What the hell does he want with all this land? 367 00:27:31,217 --> 00:27:33,344 I don't know. 368 00:27:34,554 --> 00:27:38,474 But I tell you what, if I was incriminating information... 369 00:27:38,683 --> 00:27:41,853 ...I'd be hiding in that big, huge son of a bitch. 370 00:27:42,228 --> 00:27:45,356 - How are we supposed to open that? - I don't know about you... 371 00:27:45,565 --> 00:27:48,317 ... but I'd sure hate to be that safe right now. 372 00:27:48,735 --> 00:27:50,486 Yeah! 373 00:28:04,083 --> 00:28:07,044 Holy shit. 374 00:28:17,847 --> 00:28:19,682 Hope they got e-mail. 375 00:28:32,570 --> 00:28:34,447 Oh, dear. 376 00:28:45,083 --> 00:28:47,043 What the hell? 377 00:28:50,963 --> 00:28:52,381 It's stuck on a pole. 378 00:28:52,757 --> 00:28:55,259 I'll check it. 379 00:29:08,147 --> 00:29:11,275 - Give it some gas! - Okay! 380 00:29:17,365 --> 00:29:21,577 - Hey, give it a little more gas! - Okay! 381 00:29:21,744 --> 00:29:24,956 - Hey, Bo, hold up! - Okay! 382 00:29:25,331 --> 00:29:27,125 Hey! No, Bo! No! 383 00:29:27,291 --> 00:29:29,127 Okay! 384 00:29:31,254 --> 00:29:33,923 - Yeah! - Bo! 385 00:29:35,675 --> 00:29:38,469 - No, Bo! - Sorry, cuz. 386 00:29:38,636 --> 00:29:40,471 You'd do the same thing to me. 387 00:29:40,638 --> 00:29:42,473 Bo! 388 00:29:48,438 --> 00:29:50,398 Bo, damn it! 389 00:29:51,691 --> 00:29:53,609 Hold on, little buddy! 390 00:29:57,780 --> 00:29:59,824 Oh, shit! 391 00:30:06,956 --> 00:30:08,416 Bo, you son of a... 392 00:30:28,352 --> 00:30:32,398 I said, no, Bo. No! 393 00:30:34,942 --> 00:30:38,237 I thought you said, "Go, Bo. Go." 394 00:30:38,404 --> 00:30:40,364 You see how that sounds kind of...? 395 00:30:44,243 --> 00:30:47,413 Hey, you know what? Sheev lives near here. 396 00:30:47,580 --> 00:30:49,665 Maybe he can help us open this thing up, huh? 397 00:30:50,583 --> 00:30:52,376 Yeah. 398 00:30:53,878 --> 00:30:56,464 Okay. We'll go to Sheev's. 399 00:31:05,431 --> 00:31:08,726 Rosco, this here's Chip. 400 00:31:08,893 --> 00:31:11,145 You might wanna call Hogg... 401 00:31:11,312 --> 00:31:16,067 ...and tell him them two fellers, they made off with his safe. 402 00:31:16,275 --> 00:31:19,404 And I might need a ride too. 403 00:31:24,409 --> 00:31:27,370 Boss, what kind of mood you in? 404 00:31:27,578 --> 00:31:30,748 I'm in a crawfish-boiling mood. 405 00:31:31,791 --> 00:31:36,212 Well, it seems that the Duke boys... 406 00:31:36,379 --> 00:31:38,881 ...have stolen your safe. 407 00:31:43,886 --> 00:31:47,181 I am officially upgrading the Dukes... 408 00:31:47,348 --> 00:31:52,145 ...from "fly in my ointment" to "thorn in my side." 409 00:31:52,311 --> 00:31:56,899 And if they happen to elevate themselves to "pain in my ass"... 410 00:31:57,066 --> 00:32:02,071 ...then I'm gonna boil you. Got it? 411 00:32:02,280 --> 00:32:04,615 - Yes, sir. - Now... 412 00:32:04,782 --> 00:32:08,745 ...I want you to find the Dukes and lock them up. 413 00:32:08,953 --> 00:32:13,374 Oh, and bring me my damn safe back. 414 00:32:13,541 --> 00:32:15,334 Yes, sir. 415 00:32:20,173 --> 00:32:21,466 Flash. 416 00:32:33,895 --> 00:32:35,480 Evening, Sheev. 417 00:32:38,066 --> 00:32:39,692 Sheev. 418 00:32:48,493 --> 00:32:52,288 I'm looking for them Duke boys. You seen them? 419 00:32:54,582 --> 00:32:57,710 They was last seen heading up this road here. 420 00:32:59,545 --> 00:33:03,049 You still got them CIA mind probes stuck in your head, boy? 421 00:33:03,216 --> 00:33:05,843 Far as I know. 422 00:33:06,010 --> 00:33:08,971 Good. Keep your little antennae up there... 423 00:33:09,138 --> 00:33:12,767 ...in case you see the Dukes, you let me know, you hear? 424 00:33:12,934 --> 00:33:14,519 Yeah. 425 00:33:17,522 --> 00:33:19,816 Stinks out here, you know that? 426 00:33:32,078 --> 00:33:34,080 - Is he gone, Sheev? - He's gone. 427 00:33:43,464 --> 00:33:45,591 - Prickett, Prickett. - It means a lot to me... 428 00:33:45,758 --> 00:33:47,885 ... to be invited here back to my hometown. 429 00:33:48,094 --> 00:33:50,221 I hope to remind the good people of Hazzard... 430 00:33:50,430 --> 00:33:54,183 - ... what it feels like to be proud again. - We love you, Billy! 431 00:33:54,559 --> 00:33:58,479 And I hope to remind the good people of Hazzard to come out to the rally... 432 00:33:58,646 --> 00:34:01,149 ... and cheer their favorite son, Billy Prickett! 433 00:34:03,568 --> 00:34:06,154 And I'm declaring today Billy Prickett Day. 434 00:34:07,989 --> 00:34:10,241 You're too kind. I just hope, come Saturday... 435 00:34:10,450 --> 00:34:12,994 ... I'm not too hazardous on the roads. 436 00:34:14,412 --> 00:34:16,289 "Hazardous on the roads." 437 00:34:16,622 --> 00:34:19,208 - This one's for you! - This is Tammy Arinder... 438 00:34:19,375 --> 00:34:21,836 ... at the parade, for WCNU News. 439 00:34:22,003 --> 00:34:24,172 Seeing Billy Prickett race in person? 440 00:34:24,338 --> 00:34:27,091 That might be worth putting my pants on for. 441 00:34:27,258 --> 00:34:30,219 - Bo, you racing on Saturday? - I'm planning on it. 442 00:34:30,470 --> 00:34:32,597 What's the prize for second place? 443 00:34:34,390 --> 00:34:36,142 Gonna be good. Tough one, good luck. 444 00:34:36,309 --> 00:34:38,936 It's a little weird he's coming back here to race. 445 00:34:39,145 --> 00:34:43,232 Life's weird, Luke. Someday you're gonna have to accept that. 446 00:34:46,235 --> 00:34:49,572 Well, okay. Let's take a look at that lockbox. 447 00:34:51,157 --> 00:34:53,659 Oh, yeah. Liberty 400. 448 00:34:54,160 --> 00:34:57,163 High-density, 9200-psi composite material. 449 00:34:57,330 --> 00:34:59,665 Two-inch chrome bolts, vertical and horizontal. 450 00:34:59,832 --> 00:35:03,628 And a spring-loaded, independent relocking device, with a foreign body. 451 00:35:03,795 --> 00:35:07,131 - She's a beauty. - Can you crack it? 452 00:35:07,340 --> 00:35:09,801 I'm gonna do more than crack it. 453 00:35:10,802 --> 00:35:12,970 Goddamn it. 454 00:35:17,517 --> 00:35:21,646 Armadillo. They've been infiltrating my perimeter all summer. 455 00:35:21,813 --> 00:35:25,274 - The hell you do with them? - I make helmets. 456 00:35:25,441 --> 00:35:29,320 Armadillo helmets can block even the best brain-wave scanners. 457 00:35:29,487 --> 00:35:31,656 Make a pretty good soup bowl too. 458 00:35:31,823 --> 00:35:34,659 So okay. I'm gonna go to work on this thing. 459 00:35:34,826 --> 00:35:38,663 While I do, would you be a dear, Bo, and go grab me that armadillo? 460 00:35:41,749 --> 00:35:43,584 Thanks. 461 00:35:45,002 --> 00:35:47,088 Man, he looks pissed off. 462 00:35:49,006 --> 00:35:52,176 Come on, y'all! That was a good one. 463 00:35:52,635 --> 00:35:55,388 All right, maybe you could take it off now. 464 00:35:55,722 --> 00:35:58,433 Got a real nice deal on this stuff. Government issue. 465 00:35:58,599 --> 00:36:02,186 Only expired about six months ago, so should have a real nice pop. 466 00:36:03,146 --> 00:36:05,690 Yeah! Cooter's got the General running. 467 00:36:06,399 --> 00:36:09,694 - Might be able to race on Saturday. - Really? 468 00:36:09,861 --> 00:36:13,072 We gotta get it out of there tonight. Rosco wants to impound it. 469 00:36:13,239 --> 00:36:15,283 Watch your ass, fellas. 470 00:36:21,914 --> 00:36:24,333 This is the fastest-burning fuse you got, Sheev? 471 00:36:24,500 --> 00:36:26,252 It's a Chinese fuse. 472 00:36:39,223 --> 00:36:41,476 - Might be a wet fuse. - Well, should we check it? 473 00:36:41,642 --> 00:36:44,479 Depends if you like how your face is configured, pretty boy. 474 00:36:44,645 --> 00:36:46,355 I think you got the wires backwards. 475 00:36:46,522 --> 00:36:48,900 They're supposed to be. It's a Chinese fuse. 476 00:36:49,108 --> 00:36:51,277 No, backwards from how they're supposed to be. 477 00:36:51,444 --> 00:36:54,072 You ever been to China? Have you ever been to China? 478 00:36:54,238 --> 00:36:55,656 I ate Chinese food once. 479 00:36:55,823 --> 00:36:58,367 Well, you don't blow up mu shu pork, my friend. 480 00:36:58,534 --> 00:37:00,036 I dated a Korean girl in school. 481 00:37:00,244 --> 00:37:02,789 That is a different Oriental nation. Get an education. 482 00:37:02,955 --> 00:37:05,416 - You got the fuse wrong. - You know nothing about... 483 00:37:05,583 --> 00:37:08,211 ...Chino-Sino-American relations. - You're missing the point. 484 00:37:19,847 --> 00:37:21,766 Might've used too much. 485 00:37:25,561 --> 00:37:27,980 Man, that rattled my sphincter. 486 00:37:31,984 --> 00:37:34,946 What the hell is that? Drugs? 487 00:37:35,113 --> 00:37:36,781 Don't look like no drugs I ever saw. 488 00:37:37,156 --> 00:37:41,077 - What the hell are these numbers? - It's a core sample. 489 00:37:41,452 --> 00:37:45,832 Mining. They drill a hole, take a sample, send it to the lab, see what they got. 490 00:37:45,998 --> 00:37:48,084 - Core samples of what? - How should I know? 491 00:37:48,251 --> 00:37:52,088 Am I wearing a white coat here? I cut bait and blow shit up for a living. 492 00:37:52,255 --> 00:37:56,259 - Take it to a lab. - I don't know, maybe at the university? 493 00:37:56,426 --> 00:38:00,263 - Katie-Lynn Johnson's at the university. - Oh, yeah, that's right. 494 00:38:00,430 --> 00:38:03,224 Man, I always had a thing for that girl. 495 00:38:03,391 --> 00:38:06,769 Remember she used to come by the farm with those tight little outfits? 496 00:38:06,936 --> 00:38:10,606 - No, I can't say I remember that. - I thought I had her too. 497 00:38:10,773 --> 00:38:14,652 Then she pulled a goddamn Keyser Soze on me, and like that... 498 00:38:14,861 --> 00:38:16,446 ...she was gone. 499 00:38:16,612 --> 00:38:18,781 You don't remember that? 500 00:38:18,948 --> 00:38:20,324 Well, okay. 501 00:38:20,491 --> 00:38:24,162 Unless you need something else blown, I'll go inside and wash my mongoose. 502 00:38:27,373 --> 00:38:29,167 Okay. 503 00:38:30,126 --> 00:38:32,587 Come on, Luke. Let's get the General. 504 00:38:32,879 --> 00:38:35,131 Why don't we have Cooter stash that. 505 00:38:35,298 --> 00:38:37,341 We'll take his truck, head to the highway... 506 00:38:37,550 --> 00:38:41,971 How would you feel if the General and I went to Atlanta and left you behind? 507 00:39:09,415 --> 00:39:11,042 Ain't she a Georgia peach? 508 00:39:11,250 --> 00:39:13,377 What'd you do, make a deal with the devil? 509 00:39:13,753 --> 00:39:16,589 Luke. Luke. Is that a Hemi? 510 00:39:18,841 --> 00:39:21,803 Me and my buddies lose the Gettysburg reenactment every other Sunday. 511 00:39:21,969 --> 00:39:24,138 So we figured, why not let General Lee win one? 512 00:39:24,597 --> 00:39:27,225 I don't know how we're gonna pay you back, Cooter. 513 00:39:27,392 --> 00:39:31,020 Would a BJ from Daisy be within the realm of possibility? 514 00:39:31,187 --> 00:39:33,064 Not gonna happen. 515 00:39:33,272 --> 00:39:36,067 How about a pair of her still-warm shorts? 516 00:39:36,275 --> 00:39:37,610 All right. 517 00:39:37,777 --> 00:39:41,447 Hey, Bo, just win that Hazzard Rally. That's thanks enough. 518 00:39:41,614 --> 00:39:45,743 And when you get that prize money, you pay me, because that's how it works. 519 00:39:45,952 --> 00:39:48,162 I love you, Cooter. 520 00:39:50,123 --> 00:39:52,750 - I didn't have time to fix everything. - Right. 521 00:39:55,461 --> 00:39:57,422 Let's get that car. 522 00:40:24,323 --> 00:40:27,452 Get in your cars and get them! Get after them! Now! 523 00:40:27,660 --> 00:40:29,746 Cooter! 524 00:40:35,376 --> 00:40:37,253 All right. 525 00:40:38,796 --> 00:40:41,466 That's so good, man. 526 00:40:44,135 --> 00:40:46,012 Enough. 527 00:40:46,179 --> 00:40:50,141 Man, I'm never gonna get out of this car again. I'm gonna live in it. 528 00:40:50,349 --> 00:40:53,144 I'm gonna eat in it. And I'm gonna make sweet love to it. 529 00:40:53,603 --> 00:40:55,563 You mean you gonna make sweet love in it. 530 00:40:55,730 --> 00:40:57,315 Oh, no, I wanna fuck it. 531 00:40:57,523 --> 00:41:00,234 All units, we are in hot pursuit of them Duke boys... 532 00:41:00,401 --> 00:41:03,863 ...in their piece-of-shit orange car. 533 00:41:06,574 --> 00:41:08,326 "Piece of..." You son of a bitch. 534 00:41:27,387 --> 00:41:29,013 Hey! Get back here! 535 00:41:29,222 --> 00:41:32,100 - "Lost Sheep, you out there"? - Hey, Cooter. 536 00:41:32,266 --> 00:41:35,728 These fellas ain't gonna be doing much chasing. 537 00:41:35,895 --> 00:41:38,940 - Thanks, man. - I'm gonna run right over Billy Prickett. 538 00:41:39,107 --> 00:41:40,817 How about we go to Atlanta first? 539 00:41:40,983 --> 00:41:43,486 All right, cuz. 540 00:41:45,822 --> 00:41:49,826 Oh, look at that. There's your problem right there. 541 00:41:50,034 --> 00:41:51,369 Yeah, that's a shame. 542 00:41:53,538 --> 00:41:55,998 Let's go to Atlanta. 543 00:42:05,842 --> 00:42:07,802 Luke. 544 00:42:07,969 --> 00:42:09,721 Luke. 545 00:42:11,139 --> 00:42:16,060 I know why it didn't work out with me and Katie before. It was just timing. 546 00:42:16,269 --> 00:42:18,896 Life is all about timing, you know? 547 00:42:19,188 --> 00:42:22,692 It's my time now. I'm gonna win that race on Saturday. 548 00:42:22,900 --> 00:42:26,612 We're gonna get the farm back. I got my BFF, you. 549 00:42:27,613 --> 00:42:30,408 And I'm gonna get Katie Johnson, you watch. 550 00:42:34,787 --> 00:42:36,914 It's my time. 551 00:42:38,291 --> 00:42:41,669 What's going on? 552 00:42:44,464 --> 00:42:49,177 Yeah, baby! Southern by the grace of God! 553 00:42:52,638 --> 00:42:55,183 Well, at least we know they're nice up here. 554 00:42:55,433 --> 00:42:58,978 Hurry up, you're late for your Klan meeting, asshole. 555 00:42:59,145 --> 00:43:01,731 - Klan meeting? - Don't listen to her. 556 00:43:01,898 --> 00:43:05,276 The South will rise again. 557 00:43:05,485 --> 00:43:07,737 Yee-haw, brother! 558 00:43:07,904 --> 00:43:09,947 What the hell's wrong with these people? 559 00:43:10,156 --> 00:43:13,326 Nice roof, redneck. Join us in the 21 st century? 560 00:43:21,793 --> 00:43:24,545 We're gonna make some friends up here, huh? 561 00:43:33,763 --> 00:43:36,391 Oh, excuse me. Can I help you, ma'am? 562 00:43:36,557 --> 00:43:38,393 Daisy! Oh, boy. 563 00:43:38,559 --> 00:43:40,978 Enos, what's Boss doing taking all that land? 564 00:43:41,145 --> 00:43:45,316 I don't know. They won't tell me. You gotta go. I'm supposed to arrest you. 565 00:43:45,525 --> 00:43:48,194 - Come on, I'm serious. - Get. Get out of here. 566 00:43:48,361 --> 00:43:51,531 Hey. You Anus? 567 00:43:52,115 --> 00:43:54,075 No, that's Enos, Mr. Prickett. 568 00:43:55,827 --> 00:43:59,163 Sorry about that. Is Hogg around? He asked me to come by. 569 00:43:59,330 --> 00:44:03,793 Oh, yeah. He's out back in the garage, Mr. Prickett. 570 00:44:05,211 --> 00:44:07,463 Well, howdy, ma'am. How are you today? 571 00:44:07,630 --> 00:44:10,007 It's just right on out back there. I'll show you. 572 00:44:10,174 --> 00:44:13,094 Yep, head out that way. 573 00:44:16,097 --> 00:44:18,266 There you go. 574 00:44:20,351 --> 00:44:22,228 There he is. 575 00:44:22,395 --> 00:44:24,397 - Hometown hero. - Hogg. 576 00:44:24,564 --> 00:44:26,232 - How you doing, son? - Well... 577 00:44:26,399 --> 00:44:29,694 ...this is a great place to crap, but I'm ready to head to Atlanta. 578 00:44:29,861 --> 00:44:31,237 Not before the race. 579 00:44:31,571 --> 00:44:33,740 Don't you worry about that. 580 00:44:33,906 --> 00:44:37,326 I want you down at that finish line. Sign autographs for the kids. 581 00:44:37,493 --> 00:44:39,412 - Yeah, I know the drill. - I know you do. 582 00:44:39,579 --> 00:44:42,582 But I need you there for two hours, son. Two hours. 583 00:44:42,749 --> 00:44:44,876 Kissing hands and shaking babies. 584 00:44:45,084 --> 00:44:48,713 You got that backwards. It's shaking hands and kiss the babies. 585 00:44:48,921 --> 00:44:52,842 Oh, yeah? Maybe that's why I lost that governor's election in '86. 586 00:44:57,597 --> 00:44:59,682 Hogg, what the hell am I doing here? 587 00:44:59,849 --> 00:45:01,809 Rosco. 588 00:45:04,896 --> 00:45:07,648 Whoa, what is this? You off the reservation? 589 00:45:07,815 --> 00:45:10,568 See how it kind of catches me around the eyes there? 590 00:45:10,777 --> 00:45:14,072 Look here, I already got sponsors. 591 00:45:14,238 --> 00:45:17,033 What am I supposed to tell Castrol, Yahoo!? 592 00:45:17,200 --> 00:45:19,619 Tell them it's for charity. 593 00:45:19,786 --> 00:45:22,080 - Is it? - Sure. Could be. 594 00:45:23,372 --> 00:45:27,001 Whatever you say. I'm gonna win that race by a mile. 595 00:45:27,168 --> 00:45:29,754 It don't matter whose face is on my car when I do. 596 00:45:29,921 --> 00:45:35,134 I don't need you to win the race. I just need you to show up. 597 00:45:48,272 --> 00:45:50,691 Hey there, Mr. Prickett. 598 00:45:50,858 --> 00:45:53,277 Well, hello, Daisy. 599 00:45:53,486 --> 00:45:58,616 I was just walking by, and I saw your car in the garage there. She's real sexy. 600 00:45:58,783 --> 00:46:02,120 Well, thank you. She's faster than a cheetah on cocaine. 601 00:46:02,286 --> 00:46:04,038 Yeah, I know. 602 00:46:04,205 --> 00:46:06,958 Why is there a picture of Boss Hogg on your car, though? 603 00:46:07,125 --> 00:46:09,252 - Yeah, well, he... - I read somewhere... 604 00:46:09,419 --> 00:46:15,133 ...that Coca-Cola pays you over $ 100,000 to put their logo on your door. 605 00:46:15,299 --> 00:46:17,009 - You read that? - That same article... 606 00:46:17,176 --> 00:46:20,012 ...mentioned that Budweiser pays you over $ 100,000... 607 00:46:20,179 --> 00:46:22,807 ...to put their logo on your trunk. - Look, Daisy... 608 00:46:23,015 --> 00:46:25,893 ...l'm not much of a reader. - Boss Hogg's face is sitting... 609 00:46:26,060 --> 00:46:29,731 ...on over $200,000 worth of real estate. 610 00:46:30,022 --> 00:46:31,441 Is that what he's paying you? 611 00:46:31,607 --> 00:46:36,237 Oh, no, no, Daisy, this race here is for charity. 612 00:46:36,404 --> 00:46:38,406 Really? Which one? 613 00:46:40,241 --> 00:46:41,784 Anal bifida. 614 00:46:41,951 --> 00:46:43,619 Spinal bifida. 615 00:46:43,953 --> 00:46:45,496 It's one of the bifidas. 616 00:46:47,623 --> 00:46:51,461 Have I told you that you're as purty as a Hazzard County sunset? 617 00:46:51,627 --> 00:46:54,839 Have a good day, Mr. Prickett. 618 00:46:55,048 --> 00:46:57,383 Okay. 619 00:47:15,068 --> 00:47:17,570 Lot of smart people out there. 620 00:47:40,760 --> 00:47:42,887 Look out, Katie. 621 00:47:46,265 --> 00:47:48,476 Hello. Hi. 622 00:47:48,810 --> 00:47:50,311 - Hello. - Hello. 623 00:47:50,478 --> 00:47:53,606 - Oh, boy. - Hi. 624 00:47:54,607 --> 00:47:58,653 You don't think it's too late to take them SATs, do you? 625 00:48:02,782 --> 00:48:05,410 You gotta keep an open mind in college. 626 00:48:07,161 --> 00:48:10,415 This is it, Luke. I can feel it. 627 00:48:10,623 --> 00:48:13,167 Hey, do you know where Katie Johnson is? 628 00:48:13,334 --> 00:48:15,211 I think she's in that room right there. 629 00:48:15,378 --> 00:48:17,380 - Thanks. - Thank you. 630 00:48:20,174 --> 00:48:22,677 - I got a great opening line for Katie. - What is it? 631 00:48:22,844 --> 00:48:24,595 You'll see. 632 00:48:24,804 --> 00:48:27,640 - Katie Johnson? - She's down the hall. 633 00:48:27,807 --> 00:48:31,352 - Cool. - Come on, down the hall. 634 00:48:34,105 --> 00:48:36,232 Katie Johnson? 635 00:48:36,399 --> 00:48:39,652 - She's down the hall. - Do you guys go to school here? 636 00:48:40,653 --> 00:48:42,864 No, but do you have an application? 637 00:48:43,406 --> 00:48:44,782 Not on me. 638 00:48:46,659 --> 00:48:48,995 Come on, now, focus. 639 00:48:54,333 --> 00:48:56,252 Let's hope she's not in here either. 640 00:48:56,419 --> 00:48:59,213 - Katie Johnson? - Fuck me running! 641 00:48:59,714 --> 00:49:02,633 - You looking for Katie? - We were. 642 00:49:03,009 --> 00:49:05,803 - You guys Hacky? - Hacky! 643 00:49:06,012 --> 00:49:09,140 - What about Katie? - Maybe she's in here. 644 00:49:16,189 --> 00:49:18,691 Goodbye, Bo. Bye, Luke. 645 00:49:19,067 --> 00:49:20,902 I guess she wasn't in there. 646 00:49:21,069 --> 00:49:23,654 - We didn't check under the couch. - Luke! Bo! 647 00:49:23,821 --> 00:49:25,948 - Katie. - Katie-Lynn. 648 00:49:30,369 --> 00:49:32,497 So he's still doing that? 649 00:49:34,040 --> 00:49:36,918 - Did I just faint? - No. 650 00:49:37,085 --> 00:49:39,337 Oh, my God. I can't believe y'all came. 651 00:49:40,380 --> 00:49:43,341 We just wanna pay you visit, the prettiest girl in Atlanta. 652 00:49:43,674 --> 00:49:45,510 What? 653 00:49:45,676 --> 00:49:49,180 We just wanna pay a visit to the prettiest girl in Atlanta. 654 00:49:49,347 --> 00:49:52,433 That's sweet. I can't believe what happened to y'all's farm. 655 00:49:52,600 --> 00:49:54,185 We're gonna get it back. 656 00:49:54,352 --> 00:49:57,188 I love that farm. I used to have so much fun there. 657 00:49:57,814 --> 00:49:59,524 - See? - This is my roommate, Annette. 658 00:49:59,690 --> 00:50:02,193 - Annette, this is Bo and Luke. - Nice to meet you. 659 00:50:02,360 --> 00:50:05,613 - Ma'am. - Annette's from Australia. 660 00:50:05,905 --> 00:50:09,158 Let's put another shrimp on the barbie! 661 00:50:12,370 --> 00:50:14,705 - That's what they say there. - Okay. 662 00:50:14,872 --> 00:50:16,874 What do y'all need in the geology lab? 663 00:50:17,041 --> 00:50:19,710 It has something to do with them taking our farm... 664 00:50:19,877 --> 00:50:22,547 ...but we don't know what the hell it is. 665 00:50:24,048 --> 00:50:26,884 I don't know that they'll let y'all in, but we'll take you. 666 00:50:27,051 --> 00:50:30,346 - We'll get dressed. Y'all wait downstairs. - We're gonna wait here. 667 00:50:30,513 --> 00:50:32,724 Downstairs is fine. 668 00:50:36,310 --> 00:50:39,313 It's happening, Luke. It's all happening. 669 00:50:48,072 --> 00:50:49,866 I'll give you that, Jesse. 670 00:50:50,032 --> 00:50:53,035 - I'll give you that. - Will you now? 671 00:50:54,162 --> 00:50:56,998 What are you doing with my land, Jefferson? 672 00:50:57,749 --> 00:50:59,834 Ain't your land anymore. 673 00:51:00,376 --> 00:51:03,755 Wasn't that long ago you was a moonshiner too. Remember? 674 00:51:03,921 --> 00:51:05,798 Well, I have reformed from my sins. 675 00:51:05,965 --> 00:51:08,509 I am now an honest businessman. 676 00:51:08,676 --> 00:51:10,428 Like sponsoring racecars? 677 00:51:10,595 --> 00:51:13,806 What are you getting out of bringing Billy Prickett down here? 678 00:51:15,475 --> 00:51:19,479 You know, your nephew's won that race four years in a row. 679 00:51:19,645 --> 00:51:23,316 Now, who's gonna fault me for breaking up a dynasty? 680 00:51:23,483 --> 00:51:25,568 Well, I know you're rich, and I know you stink. 681 00:51:25,777 --> 00:51:27,612 But you ain't stinking rich. 682 00:51:27,779 --> 00:51:30,031 You wouldn't be throwing that money at Prickett... 683 00:51:30,198 --> 00:51:32,867 ...unless you thought he was gonna earn you 10 times that. 684 00:51:33,034 --> 00:51:37,830 You're a smart man. So why don't you do the smart thing. 685 00:51:37,997 --> 00:51:41,042 Why don't you take your family and leave. 686 00:51:41,209 --> 00:51:44,796 Because, see, now I own that farm. 687 00:51:44,962 --> 00:51:48,424 And you ain't never gonna get it back. 688 00:52:00,144 --> 00:52:03,064 I have all the cards, Jesse. 689 00:52:03,231 --> 00:52:04,941 You don't have spit. 690 00:52:05,400 --> 00:52:07,485 It ain't over yet. 691 00:52:12,281 --> 00:52:15,368 Hey, Bo, I love your car. She really rumbles. 692 00:52:15,660 --> 00:52:18,371 It's actually a he. Right, Katie? 693 00:52:25,294 --> 00:52:26,879 I ain't even speeding. 694 00:52:44,856 --> 00:52:47,150 You know how fast you were going? 695 00:52:47,316 --> 00:52:52,113 - What? - How fast you were going. 696 00:52:53,030 --> 00:52:55,867 - I don't know. Ten? - Eight. 697 00:52:56,033 --> 00:53:01,038 - Isn't the speed limit 10? - Yeah. It is. 698 00:53:01,539 --> 00:53:04,000 You guys police? 699 00:53:04,208 --> 00:53:05,835 Campus police. 700 00:53:12,467 --> 00:53:14,510 Mother of God. 701 00:53:23,478 --> 00:53:25,021 Oh, wait. 702 00:53:35,490 --> 00:53:39,535 I know it's a shame to hide your beauty like this, but it's for your own good. 703 00:53:39,702 --> 00:53:41,079 What? 704 00:53:41,662 --> 00:53:43,956 I'm not even gonna respond to that. That's crazy. 705 00:53:44,248 --> 00:53:48,086 I know, I'll miss you too. I'll be right back. 706 00:53:48,669 --> 00:53:51,506 All right, let's go. Let's go. 707 00:53:57,053 --> 00:54:01,391 Katie-Lynn seems like a girl you could settle down with, don't you think, Luke? 708 00:54:01,557 --> 00:54:03,309 - Yeah. - I don't know, fellas. 709 00:54:03,476 --> 00:54:05,770 I don't think they're gonna let us walk in. 710 00:54:05,937 --> 00:54:10,608 You'll think of something, Katie. You always do. Remember that...? 711 00:54:10,775 --> 00:54:13,403 Oh, you're so pretty. 712 00:54:25,123 --> 00:54:27,667 I have an idea. 713 00:54:34,632 --> 00:54:38,052 - Can I help you? - You're just the guy we're looking for... 714 00:54:38,219 --> 00:54:39,971 - Royce. - Royce...? 715 00:54:40,138 --> 00:54:43,850 - Royce Williams. - Royce Williams, maybe you can help us. 716 00:54:44,016 --> 00:54:49,147 We're here looking for the brightest young geologists for high-paying jobs. 717 00:54:49,313 --> 00:54:50,815 Maybe you've been by our booth. 718 00:54:50,982 --> 00:54:54,318 - You're from Kamasaka Technologies? - That's right. 719 00:54:54,485 --> 00:54:58,322 I'm Mr. Ichinowa, and this is my colleague... 720 00:54:58,489 --> 00:54:59,991 ...Yoko Takanoshi. 721 00:55:01,617 --> 00:55:02,952 Right on. 722 00:55:03,745 --> 00:55:05,538 You said you were Japanese? 723 00:55:06,122 --> 00:55:07,331 We converted. 724 00:55:09,000 --> 00:55:12,462 Your professor tells us you're some kind of super-genius or something. 725 00:55:12,670 --> 00:55:16,841 - Really? On my last test I got a C-minus. - Hey, that's good. 726 00:55:17,008 --> 00:55:20,094 - That's real good. - You think...? 727 00:55:20,261 --> 00:55:22,555 You just might be Kamasaka Tech material. 728 00:55:23,181 --> 00:55:25,516 You just gotta pass this one little test. 729 00:55:25,683 --> 00:55:29,479 You just tell us what this is right here. 730 00:55:29,687 --> 00:55:31,981 Looks like a core sample. 731 00:55:32,148 --> 00:55:35,276 - Man, that's good. - He's good. 732 00:55:35,443 --> 00:55:39,030 - Core sample of what? - Oh, of course. 733 00:55:55,671 --> 00:55:58,466 - What are you doing? - What? 734 00:55:58,633 --> 00:56:02,804 - What the fuck was that? - Relax. 735 00:56:12,230 --> 00:56:14,023 Damn! Damn! 736 00:56:14,482 --> 00:56:16,192 These are my good Levi's. 737 00:56:16,359 --> 00:56:18,444 Let's not lose focus here, Royce. 738 00:56:18,611 --> 00:56:20,196 Yes, sir, Mr. Takanoshi. 739 00:56:20,363 --> 00:56:22,990 - What'd you call me? - Mr. Takanoshi? 740 00:56:23,574 --> 00:56:26,702 Right. That's my name. 741 00:56:28,037 --> 00:56:31,916 - Thought it might be drugs or something. - I think I know what it is. 742 00:56:44,554 --> 00:56:47,014 Are you really with Kamasaka Technologies? 743 00:56:47,181 --> 00:56:49,934 Damn it, we are high-powered Japanese executives. 744 00:56:50,101 --> 00:56:52,729 We work hard, and we play even harder. 745 00:56:52,937 --> 00:56:54,605 Now, tell us what you see there... 746 00:56:54,772 --> 00:56:57,817 ...or we'll go find another candidate at Georgia Polytech. 747 00:56:57,984 --> 00:57:00,862 It's anthracite. 748 00:57:01,404 --> 00:57:04,699 - Coal. - Coal in Hazzard? 749 00:57:04,866 --> 00:57:08,077 - What's the street value of this? - This much? Nothing. 750 00:57:08,244 --> 00:57:10,663 A good-sized mine? Could be millions. 751 00:57:11,080 --> 00:57:13,583 Can you show us what a good-sized mine looks like? 752 00:57:13,750 --> 00:57:15,835 Yeah. 753 00:57:18,755 --> 00:57:22,258 Here's what it used to look like. And this is the after. 754 00:57:26,971 --> 00:57:29,098 Damn. 755 00:57:29,474 --> 00:57:33,394 - Hogg's gonna do this to Hazzard? - The hell he is. 756 00:57:33,644 --> 00:57:36,522 Mr. Kamasaka? We have to go. The plane is leaving. 757 00:57:36,689 --> 00:57:40,693 Congratulations, Royce. You got the job. How does 24,000 yen a year sound? 758 00:57:41,027 --> 00:57:42,904 Sounds like 40 bucks. 759 00:57:43,071 --> 00:57:44,405 Way to go. 760 00:57:44,572 --> 00:57:47,992 All right, man. See you in Beijing. 761 00:57:51,954 --> 00:57:55,833 - You see two guys come through here? - You mean those two Japanese guys? 762 00:58:15,019 --> 00:58:17,605 Get me Atlanta P.D. Damn. 763 00:58:17,772 --> 00:58:19,023 Strip-mining? 764 00:58:19,273 --> 00:58:20,691 Why, that slimy bastard. 765 00:58:21,109 --> 00:58:22,610 Here's another little nugget. 766 00:58:22,777 --> 00:58:25,863 Hogg has been paying that kid Prickett a lot of money... 767 00:58:26,030 --> 00:58:28,366 ...to race here Saturday. - He's paying him? 768 00:58:28,908 --> 00:58:32,161 Y'all better get your asses back here quick as you can, got it? 769 00:58:32,328 --> 00:58:34,705 Ten-four, Shepherd, this is Lost Sheep out. 770 00:58:36,499 --> 00:58:39,210 What's this? What's these crackers doing in our place? 771 00:58:39,377 --> 00:58:43,005 Turns out Prickett came back because Hogg paid him a assload of cash. 772 00:58:43,297 --> 00:58:46,217 Don't mean Billy has anything to do with strip-mining. 773 00:58:46,384 --> 00:58:48,052 You got to be kidding me. 774 00:58:48,761 --> 00:58:50,680 Oh, shit. Roll them up. 775 00:58:51,514 --> 00:58:54,392 - What the hell is this, man? - Looks like somebody's lost. 776 00:58:54,559 --> 00:58:58,020 Look, a couple of white boys playing black. Is that's what's going on? 777 00:58:58,187 --> 00:59:01,691 Actually, we were at the geology lab for some environmental stuff, and... 778 00:59:01,899 --> 00:59:06,863 No, I get it. They on one of these reality shows. 779 00:59:07,071 --> 00:59:09,949 - Who Wanna Get They Ass Kicked? - Yeah. 780 00:59:10,700 --> 00:59:14,704 Why don't you two hillbillies join us up here for a minute? 781 00:59:14,871 --> 00:59:16,873 Actually, we prefer Appalachian-Americans. 782 00:59:17,081 --> 00:59:18,708 Man, get out the car! 783 00:59:20,877 --> 00:59:24,589 Now, which one of you two brothers is Michelangelo? 784 00:59:26,090 --> 00:59:30,678 There's a certain creek that people sometimes canoe up without a paddle. 785 00:59:30,845 --> 00:59:35,516 You could say that the Duke boys were on that particular creek right now. 786 00:59:35,683 --> 00:59:38,019 Let's kick they ass, Jerry! 787 00:59:39,687 --> 00:59:42,482 Never thought I'd say this, but, hot damn, it's the cops. 788 00:59:44,442 --> 00:59:45,860 There goes the canoe. 789 00:59:50,948 --> 00:59:53,034 - Give me your shoelaces. - What? 790 00:59:53,201 --> 00:59:57,622 These guys over there gave me theirs. See, I'm gonna fashion myself a lasso. 791 00:59:57,789 --> 01:00:01,417 When the jailer comes in, I'm gonna rope his keys. 792 01:00:01,584 --> 01:00:05,630 Luke and Bo Duke are home free. Period, end of story. 793 01:00:05,797 --> 01:00:08,925 I got on cowboy boots, cuz. 794 01:00:09,092 --> 01:00:11,886 I like your style. 795 01:00:12,053 --> 01:00:13,971 You gonna need those shoelaces? 796 01:00:14,138 --> 01:00:17,100 We gonna have to get out of here. 797 01:00:17,350 --> 01:00:21,687 Hey, Yul Brynner. We gotta make a phone call. We gotta call our lawyer. 798 01:00:21,854 --> 01:00:23,481 What the hell are we in here for? 799 01:00:23,815 --> 01:00:28,277 Well, where should I start? 800 01:00:34,325 --> 01:00:36,327 We know you're gonna strip-mine Hazzard. 801 01:00:36,494 --> 01:00:39,914 Do you, now? Well, that's good. 802 01:00:40,081 --> 01:00:42,417 Guess where I'm gonna sink that first drill. 803 01:00:42,583 --> 01:00:45,253 Right down in the middle of your bedroom. 804 01:00:45,420 --> 01:00:49,257 Y'all do still share a bunk bed, right? 805 01:00:49,424 --> 01:00:52,635 Hey, that's a phat suit there. What, you some type of pimp? 806 01:00:55,221 --> 01:01:00,059 What has strip-mining got to do with you paying Billy Prickett to race tomorrow? 807 01:01:00,435 --> 01:01:03,229 You like magic, Luke? Sleight of hand? 808 01:01:03,396 --> 01:01:09,569 See, while you're looking over here, something's really happening over here. 809 01:01:09,736 --> 01:01:15,158 You see, despite the fact that I now own your beloved farm... 810 01:01:15,324 --> 01:01:20,079 ...I can't legally mine it, because the county won't let me. 811 01:01:20,246 --> 01:01:22,665 I need to hold a public hearing, you know... 812 01:01:22,832 --> 01:01:28,379 ...to give the citizens of Hazzard a chance to object. 813 01:01:29,047 --> 01:01:32,967 And let me guess, you're going to hold the hearing during the rally tomorrow? 814 01:01:33,134 --> 01:01:37,430 And if nobody knows about the hearing, there won't be anyone there to object. 815 01:01:38,473 --> 01:01:40,516 - There you go. - Sleight of hand. 816 01:01:40,683 --> 01:01:43,019 - Sleight of hand. - Grow the fingernails out. 817 01:01:43,186 --> 01:01:46,189 Then pop some fingernail polish on them bitches. 818 01:01:47,523 --> 01:01:49,734 - Is Billy Prickett in on it? - Prickett? 819 01:01:51,778 --> 01:01:56,491 - Prickett's just collecting a paycheck. - We ain't gonna let you get away with it. 820 01:01:56,657 --> 01:02:01,496 Really? Tomorrow, if you happen to be strolling by the courthouse about noon... 821 01:02:01,662 --> 01:02:04,916 ...you might wanna rush right in there and voice your objections. 822 01:02:05,083 --> 01:02:06,667 Voice this. 823 01:02:08,753 --> 01:02:11,547 Dadgum it. I just remembered. 824 01:02:11,714 --> 01:02:15,093 Tomorrow morning you're going to the Georgia work farm. 825 01:02:15,259 --> 01:02:19,389 And I hear they have a rather strict policy on weekend passes. 826 01:02:19,597 --> 01:02:22,558 Yo, B. You need to pop a feather in that hat, yo. 827 01:02:22,725 --> 01:02:25,395 Then your man ho's will be having more respect for you. 828 01:02:25,728 --> 01:02:27,438 I have $ 100 right here... 829 01:02:27,605 --> 01:02:30,400 ...for whoever knocks that loudmouth son of a bitch out. 830 01:02:32,318 --> 01:02:33,736 Thank you. 831 01:02:33,903 --> 01:02:36,447 Now, break some rocks for me, boys. 832 01:02:36,614 --> 01:02:39,283 Take care, now, you hear? 833 01:02:39,450 --> 01:02:41,577 Bye-bye. 834 01:02:42,745 --> 01:02:46,332 Don't you know you're not supposed to wear white after Labor Day? 835 01:03:05,226 --> 01:03:07,103 All right, here's what we're gonna do. 836 01:03:07,270 --> 01:03:11,649 When we stop for gas, we call up Cooter and tell him to put a pig in the road, right. 837 01:03:11,816 --> 01:03:16,028 Then when the cops are moving the pig, Cooter hooks up a cable to the bumper. 838 01:03:16,195 --> 01:03:19,574 Car drives away, the hook will pull out the whole chassis. 839 01:03:19,741 --> 01:03:22,160 He can't drive without a chassis... 840 01:03:22,326 --> 01:03:23,995 All right, shut up back there! 841 01:03:24,162 --> 01:03:27,206 My cousin's starting to go crazy. We gotta get him to a hospital. 842 01:03:27,373 --> 01:03:29,667 I think he done caught the fever, or something. 843 01:03:29,834 --> 01:03:33,421 That's what happens when you're humping livestock, hillbilly. 844 01:03:33,588 --> 01:03:36,007 Can we help you guys out with anything up there... 845 01:03:36,174 --> 01:03:38,342 ...oblige you with a reach-around or something? 846 01:03:38,509 --> 01:03:40,887 Of course, you'd have to un-cuff us first. 847 01:03:41,054 --> 01:03:44,390 Sarge, if you and me was to have a chase, you think you could catch me? 848 01:03:44,891 --> 01:03:48,019 - Appears to me you caught already, son. - I'm serious. 849 01:03:48,186 --> 01:03:52,106 If I had my car and you was in this one, you really think you could catch me? 850 01:03:52,273 --> 01:03:54,984 Because, bubba, this car feels kind of slow to me. 851 01:03:55,151 --> 01:03:58,112 She's got plenty under the hood, don't you worry about that. 852 01:03:58,279 --> 01:03:59,906 - No balls. - No balls. 853 01:04:00,073 --> 01:04:02,241 No balls. No balls. 854 01:04:02,408 --> 01:04:03,826 - No balls. - No balls. 855 01:04:03,993 --> 01:04:05,995 You wanna see balls? 856 01:04:06,162 --> 01:04:08,998 - No balls. No balls. - Will you slow this car down? 857 01:04:09,165 --> 01:04:12,502 You letting them get your panties in a bunch. You the officer. 858 01:04:12,668 --> 01:04:15,046 Shut the hell up back there. All right? 859 01:04:15,338 --> 01:04:18,716 - No balls. - Oh, my God. Will you look at that? 860 01:04:18,925 --> 01:04:22,011 You need a napkin to eat them drumsticks, boy. 861 01:04:23,638 --> 01:04:26,391 - Goddamn it. - Nice driving! 862 01:04:32,230 --> 01:04:34,273 What seems to be the problem, sugar? 863 01:04:34,774 --> 01:04:37,568 I think something bounced up into my undercarriage. 864 01:04:37,735 --> 01:04:40,071 - Will you take a look? - Ma'am, I'd be pleased... 865 01:04:40,238 --> 01:04:42,573 ...to check your undercarriage. - Thank you. 866 01:04:42,740 --> 01:04:45,326 I stopped you because your taillight is out. 867 01:04:45,493 --> 01:04:47,286 Stopped me? Sir, you hit me. 868 01:04:47,453 --> 01:04:50,415 Because your taillight is out, and we couldn't see you brake. 869 01:04:50,581 --> 01:04:52,959 - You're gonna write me a ticket? - Yep. 870 01:04:53,292 --> 01:04:55,169 This is ridiculous! 871 01:04:57,588 --> 01:05:00,466 Is there anything I can help you out with today, ma'am? 872 01:05:00,633 --> 01:05:03,511 Do cute cops grow on trees around here or what? 873 01:05:03,720 --> 01:05:07,765 Well, I, you know... Pushups. Kind of you to notice. 874 01:05:07,932 --> 01:05:10,977 Let me see what's going on under your hood here. 875 01:05:12,729 --> 01:05:16,482 - Damn, that's hot. - Here. Maybe this'll help. 876 01:05:20,403 --> 01:05:23,781 - Bless you. - No, no, no. My undercarriage. 877 01:05:23,948 --> 01:05:26,367 - Your undercarriage? - Yeah. 878 01:05:33,750 --> 01:05:37,170 Looks like you boys have the magic touch. 879 01:05:47,055 --> 01:05:49,390 I was about to seal the deal when you came over. 880 01:05:49,557 --> 01:05:51,768 What? She was looking at me the whole time. 881 01:05:53,269 --> 01:05:56,105 - Let's get out of here. - Where are the goddamn keys? 882 01:06:01,527 --> 01:06:04,030 Y'all think you can catch me now? 883 01:06:18,586 --> 01:06:20,463 Buckle up, this might get exciting. 884 01:06:20,630 --> 01:06:24,050 That's all right. We'll be long gone before another cop shows up. 885 01:06:25,510 --> 01:06:26,677 Get skinny! 886 01:06:37,897 --> 01:06:40,483 - Okay, where's the highway? - Don't you have a map? 887 01:06:41,567 --> 01:06:43,027 Wait. I got it. 888 01:06:46,531 --> 01:06:47,865 Turn left up here! 889 01:06:48,032 --> 01:06:49,367 Turn left, turn left! 890 01:06:50,868 --> 01:06:52,870 Damn it, I said, left! 891 01:06:53,037 --> 01:06:55,415 - You said your left! - My left is your left. 892 01:06:55,581 --> 01:06:58,292 I'm gonna need these directions faster. 893 01:07:01,045 --> 01:07:04,006 It's okay. I know exactly where we're at. 894 01:07:11,556 --> 01:07:13,266 So, girls, how's the back seat? 895 01:07:13,433 --> 01:07:17,395 I haven't had this much fun since we used to sneak up to the hayloft. 896 01:07:19,021 --> 01:07:22,150 You remember those tight little outfits you used to make me wear. 897 01:07:27,447 --> 01:07:31,033 - I didn't know how to break it to you. - You didn't know? 898 01:07:31,242 --> 01:07:33,077 Luke, you said he was okay with it. 899 01:07:36,748 --> 01:07:39,125 Look at the road, Bo. 900 01:07:39,292 --> 01:07:41,335 Bo, look at the road. 901 01:07:42,503 --> 01:07:45,757 - Look at the road. - Supposed to be my time. 902 01:07:47,050 --> 01:07:48,384 Bo! 903 01:08:09,530 --> 01:08:10,907 I think I'm gonna chunder. 904 01:08:11,074 --> 01:08:12,950 - Is that bad? - That means "vomit." 905 01:08:13,117 --> 01:08:14,660 - Not in the car. - Bo! 906 01:08:41,479 --> 01:08:44,440 You told me she wasn't emotionally available for me. 907 01:08:44,607 --> 01:08:47,693 That it was better to lose a lover than to love a loser! 908 01:08:47,860 --> 01:08:50,238 Because you would faint every time you saw her! 909 01:08:50,405 --> 01:08:52,949 I don't faint. 910 01:08:55,034 --> 01:08:56,494 You called me a loser? 911 01:08:56,661 --> 01:08:58,621 I was trying to make him feel better. 912 01:08:58,788 --> 01:09:00,331 Can you just let me out here? 913 01:09:14,220 --> 01:09:17,515 Bo, this is some of the best driving I ever seen you do. 914 01:09:17,682 --> 01:09:20,643 - Ain't that right, girls? - Great driving, Bo. Great driving. 915 01:09:20,810 --> 01:09:22,478 Don't kiss my ass. 916 01:09:27,817 --> 01:09:30,820 - Bo, you gotta get us out of here. - I can't hear you. 917 01:09:31,028 --> 01:09:33,990 - You're being ridiculous, Bo. - Life is ridiculous, Katie. 918 01:09:34,198 --> 01:09:36,242 I really need a plastic bag now. 919 01:09:42,123 --> 01:09:44,042 What is the purpose of this circle? 920 01:09:47,754 --> 01:09:49,088 How do we get out of here? 921 01:09:49,255 --> 01:09:51,466 - Take this right. - I'm not listening to you. 922 01:09:51,632 --> 01:09:53,551 Take a right here. 923 01:09:55,178 --> 01:09:56,512 Hell. 924 01:10:06,397 --> 01:10:08,608 You're scaring the girls. Get back on the road. 925 01:10:08,775 --> 01:10:11,652 - Say sorry for stealing Katie. - You were never together! 926 01:10:11,819 --> 01:10:13,488 I liked her. You betrayed that. 927 01:10:13,654 --> 01:10:16,324 - I liked her too! - I liked her first. 928 01:10:17,366 --> 01:10:18,576 Calm down, Bo! 929 01:10:18,743 --> 01:10:20,787 I will calm down when he says he's sorry! 930 01:10:20,953 --> 01:10:23,039 - Say you're sorry. - I ain't saying it. 931 01:10:23,206 --> 01:10:25,500 Have you made your peace with God yet, Luke? 932 01:10:25,666 --> 01:10:29,087 Because you're about to meet your maker! 933 01:10:29,379 --> 01:10:30,838 - Just say you're sorry! - No. 934 01:10:31,005 --> 01:10:34,675 We had a good time, and I'm not gonna apologize for that. 935 01:10:50,733 --> 01:10:53,111 Okay, I'm sorry. 936 01:10:53,277 --> 01:10:55,780 Fine. I'll take Annette. 937 01:10:58,825 --> 01:11:01,202 That was fun. 938 01:11:09,293 --> 01:11:11,754 Lost Sheep, Lost Sheep, are you out there? 939 01:11:11,921 --> 01:11:13,297 Uncle Jesse, where are you? 940 01:11:13,464 --> 01:11:17,260 There's a hearing at the courthouse. We gotta get everybody over there now. 941 01:11:17,427 --> 01:11:19,804 Sounds like a mighty fine plan, Lucas. 942 01:11:19,971 --> 01:11:22,515 Only got one wrinkle to it. 943 01:11:22,682 --> 01:11:29,105 You do that, could be very bad for Jesse and Pauline's health. 944 01:11:29,397 --> 01:11:31,149 Hogg, you lay one hand on them... 945 01:11:31,315 --> 01:11:34,360 ...and I'll shove a apple in your mouth and my foot up your ass. 946 01:11:34,527 --> 01:11:36,195 Well, you bring the Vaseline. 947 01:11:36,863 --> 01:11:38,489 We'll make it a party. 948 01:11:38,656 --> 01:11:42,285 You two boys stay out of Hazzard, and I mean it this time. 949 01:11:42,452 --> 01:11:45,163 - Where you think they got them? - I don't know. 950 01:11:45,329 --> 01:11:48,666 - Hogg's never gone this far before. - You ready to go that far? 951 01:11:49,333 --> 01:11:52,920 Cousin, I'm always ready to go that far. 952 01:12:06,184 --> 01:12:09,437 What are we doing here? This is Derek Sheevington's place. 953 01:12:09,604 --> 01:12:13,858 Yeah. Pretty good chance this is gonna get ugly, so we're gonna drop you here. 954 01:12:14,025 --> 01:12:17,070 He got caught drinking out of the toilet in the girls' bathroom. 955 01:12:17,236 --> 01:12:20,865 I know, I know. But we're gonna need you girls to work with him. 956 01:12:21,949 --> 01:12:23,242 Oh, good God. 957 01:12:26,037 --> 01:12:28,706 Why, Katie Johnson, is that you? 958 01:12:28,873 --> 01:12:30,708 Boy, you filled out real nice. 959 01:12:30,875 --> 01:12:33,711 Yeah. You filled out real nice too, Sheev. 960 01:12:33,878 --> 01:12:37,840 What's going on, Sheev? Looks like we're gonna need some of those toys. 961 01:12:38,049 --> 01:12:41,886 Leave them two girls here, I'll give you anything you want. 962 01:12:42,053 --> 01:12:44,555 Come on in. I'll put a stew on. 963 01:12:54,190 --> 01:12:58,069 - Hazzard County Police Department. - Enos, this is Boss Hogg. 964 01:12:58,236 --> 01:13:00,279 Me and Rosco are over at the Duke place. 965 01:13:00,446 --> 01:13:04,242 - lf anybody wants us, we'll be here. - Well, that's mighty consid... 966 01:13:06,744 --> 01:13:11,290 Rosco, I'm going over and join the governor at the rally. 967 01:13:11,457 --> 01:13:15,253 Do not be late going to the courthouse. 968 01:13:15,420 --> 01:13:18,715 Boss, how come you told old Enos there where we was at? 969 01:13:22,093 --> 01:13:24,637 You remember the time we tried to fix the rodeo? 970 01:13:24,804 --> 01:13:28,516 - Yeah. - It was Enos that told the Dukes about it. 971 01:13:28,975 --> 01:13:32,478 Then we tried to spread those rumors about the Mad Cow Disease... 972 01:13:32,645 --> 01:13:36,816 ...so my chicken factories would make a little more profit. 973 01:13:36,983 --> 01:13:39,485 It was Enos that told the Duke boys. 974 01:13:39,652 --> 01:13:42,280 So you want them Duke boys to come out here? 975 01:14:14,687 --> 01:14:19,859 Enos, where's Boss Hogg and Rosco? 976 01:14:20,026 --> 01:14:22,445 They're at your farm. 977 01:14:22,987 --> 01:14:25,114 Thank you, Enos. 978 01:14:29,827 --> 01:14:32,288 That might be a new record. 979 01:14:38,169 --> 01:14:40,671 What? Okay, thanks, Daisy. 980 01:14:42,632 --> 01:14:44,008 He's at our farm. 981 01:14:46,344 --> 01:14:48,471 Hey. Hey, look, there's Prickett. 982 01:14:49,180 --> 01:14:51,391 - So? - He can help us. 983 01:14:51,557 --> 01:14:54,394 He don't care about Hazzard. He's getting paid to be here. 984 01:14:54,560 --> 01:14:56,813 Oh, man, you're wrong. He's from here. 985 01:15:04,153 --> 01:15:07,115 - You out of your goddamn mind? - Hey, Billy. 986 01:15:07,281 --> 01:15:11,119 - Boss Hogg's gonna strip-mine Hazzard. - Just hold your horses. 987 01:15:11,285 --> 01:15:14,497 - Who's stripping? - He's playing you, man. 988 01:15:14,664 --> 01:15:17,291 - He paid you to come and race... - Just save your breath. 989 01:15:17,458 --> 01:15:20,294 - I already know. - You already know? 990 01:15:21,879 --> 01:15:25,425 - But this is your hometown. - I hate to break this to you, Bo-Bo... 991 01:15:25,591 --> 01:15:28,219 ...but this place is a shithole. 992 01:15:28,386 --> 01:15:32,348 If it wasn't a strip mine, it'd be a strip mall. 993 01:15:34,016 --> 01:15:38,521 Kind of like one of them outlets where everything's reduced prices and... 994 01:15:38,688 --> 01:15:42,358 Hell, they don't even have an Outback Steakhouse down here. Am I right? 995 01:15:42,525 --> 01:15:45,403 - Right as pie, Billy. - Saddle up, Dil. 996 01:15:49,741 --> 01:15:54,078 Look at the bright side, Bo-Bo. At least you didn't have to race me today. 997 01:15:54,245 --> 01:15:58,082 Because I would've left that little Tonka toy you drive at the starting stripe. 998 01:15:58,249 --> 01:16:00,585 - Tonka. - I'm gonna kill him. 999 01:16:00,752 --> 01:16:03,046 Hey, hey, hey! 1000 01:16:03,212 --> 01:16:05,465 - What about Uncle Jesse? - Wanna ride this stag? 1001 01:16:05,631 --> 01:16:09,010 - You wanna rodeo with this clown? - Uncle Jesse's old, Luke. 1002 01:16:09,177 --> 01:16:10,845 He's had a good run. 1003 01:16:11,012 --> 01:16:16,642 Besides, if he passes, God have mercy on his soul, we get the farm. 1004 01:16:19,645 --> 01:16:22,732 I'm just playing with you, man. Let's go get him. 1005 01:16:34,327 --> 01:16:36,037 They're here. 1006 01:16:42,752 --> 01:16:44,128 Cooter, you ready out there? 1007 01:16:44,295 --> 01:16:47,507 You get Rosco out of there, Daisy and I'll take care of the rest. 1008 01:16:47,673 --> 01:16:50,760 What do you say we smoke the varmint out of his hole? 1009 01:16:53,471 --> 01:16:56,808 Hey, Rosco, come on out, you fat son of a bitch! 1010 01:17:03,147 --> 01:17:05,691 - Cletus, get your butt out there. - Thank you, Rosco. 1011 01:17:19,914 --> 01:17:22,667 - Let me know if you're gonna puke! - Oh, you'll know first! 1012 01:17:29,841 --> 01:17:33,219 All right, boys! Y'all come on out of there with your hands up. 1013 01:17:34,971 --> 01:17:37,223 - Hey, Rosco! - Hi, Boo-Boo. 1014 01:17:48,067 --> 01:17:50,361 I didn't know we had so many pigs on the farm. 1015 01:18:02,206 --> 01:18:05,376 - I call this "painting the fence." - I think you missed a spot. 1016 01:18:09,422 --> 01:18:11,382 Look out, look out! 1017 01:18:11,632 --> 01:18:13,968 - You gonna get us out of here? - I'm working on it! 1018 01:18:29,942 --> 01:18:32,028 Man, they're hauling ass, pick it up! 1019 01:18:42,121 --> 01:18:44,499 - You gonna make that? - I'm planning on it. 1020 01:18:47,585 --> 01:18:49,462 Hold on, Luke. 1021 01:18:53,174 --> 01:18:54,926 I'll go in this direction now! 1022 01:19:08,648 --> 01:19:11,442 All right, Jesse. I'm arresting those... 1023 01:19:12,026 --> 01:19:15,113 Jesse? Jesse? 1024 01:19:18,241 --> 01:19:20,243 Courthouse. 1025 01:19:28,626 --> 01:19:32,255 Attention! Attention, good people of Hazzard! 1026 01:19:32,422 --> 01:19:35,299 Life as we know it is about to end. 1027 01:19:35,466 --> 01:19:40,263 As we speak, dark forces are conspiring to strip-mine our land. 1028 01:19:40,430 --> 01:19:42,765 Follow me to the courthouse, and we'll save you! 1029 01:19:44,642 --> 01:19:48,771 Yeah, right, Sheev. Last year the CIA was brainwashing our cows. 1030 01:19:49,480 --> 01:19:50,857 Get a job, man. 1031 01:19:52,150 --> 01:19:53,985 Hey, Sheev. Sheev. 1032 01:19:54,152 --> 01:19:58,197 - Go back to your spaceship. - I'm serious. Come on! 1033 01:19:59,323 --> 01:20:00,408 Bye, Sheev. 1034 01:20:14,797 --> 01:20:16,716 It might be good if you helped out here. 1035 01:20:16,883 --> 01:20:19,010 - Hell, move over, I'll drive. - No way. 1036 01:20:19,177 --> 01:20:21,054 I'm still hoping to survive this thing. 1037 01:20:23,014 --> 01:20:24,682 Goddamn it. Son of a bitch. 1038 01:20:28,019 --> 01:20:30,980 I like the way you think, cuz. Yeah, boy! 1039 01:20:49,540 --> 01:20:51,042 Hold on. 1040 01:21:05,973 --> 01:21:08,309 Lost Sheep, Lost Sheep, are you out there? 1041 01:21:08,935 --> 01:21:10,103 Go for Lost Sheep. 1042 01:21:10,269 --> 01:21:12,480 - Free and clear. - Good. 1043 01:21:12,647 --> 01:21:15,191 Sheev's making sure everyone goes to the hearing. 1044 01:21:15,358 --> 01:21:17,110 - I'll see you in town. - Over and out. 1045 01:21:17,276 --> 01:21:18,778 Let's get the hell out of here. 1046 01:21:24,033 --> 01:21:27,912 - Barn door, coming up. - Yeah, I see it. Hold on! 1047 01:21:50,393 --> 01:21:52,061 The General! 1048 01:21:52,311 --> 01:21:54,021 Let's head to the courthouse! 1049 01:21:58,317 --> 01:22:01,279 End of the World to Lost Sheep, End of the World to Lost Sheep. 1050 01:22:01,446 --> 01:22:03,448 - Come in, Lost Sheep. - What do you got? 1051 01:22:03,614 --> 01:22:05,950 - Everybody headed into town? - That's a negative. 1052 01:22:06,117 --> 01:22:07,577 Repeat, that's a negative. 1053 01:22:07,785 --> 01:22:10,371 No one listened. They threw hot dogs at us. 1054 01:22:11,205 --> 01:22:14,042 - Did you tell them about the strip mine? - Of course I did. 1055 01:22:14,625 --> 01:22:17,754 Were you wearing a armadillo helmet when you told them about it? 1056 01:22:20,131 --> 01:22:21,424 No. 1057 01:22:22,467 --> 01:22:23,926 Okay, Lost Sheep out. 1058 01:22:24,969 --> 01:22:26,596 No one's heading in to town? 1059 01:22:26,804 --> 01:22:30,767 If we don't get to that courthouse by noon, there ain't gonna be no town. 1060 01:22:33,644 --> 01:22:37,440 - Well, we still got time for Plan B. - I like Plan B. 1061 01:22:37,607 --> 01:22:38,900 - Plan B. - Plan B. 1062 01:22:39,067 --> 01:22:41,277 When you're flying by the seat of your pants... 1063 01:22:41,444 --> 01:22:44,572 ... nothing sounds more official than a Plan B. 1064 01:22:46,157 --> 01:22:48,993 Don't worry, cuz, I'll get them to the courthouse. 1065 01:23:13,101 --> 01:23:16,354 This emergency hearing is now in session. 1066 01:23:17,897 --> 01:23:20,066 Rosco, where is everybody? 1067 01:23:21,526 --> 01:23:22,944 I'm here. 1068 01:23:23,611 --> 01:23:24,946 Well, we have until noon. 1069 01:24:05,945 --> 01:24:10,324 Now, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls... 1070 01:24:10,491 --> 01:24:15,413 ...it's my honor today to introduce my friend... 1071 01:24:15,580 --> 01:24:21,753 ...and the friend of everybody in the greatest state of the United States... 1072 01:24:24,589 --> 01:24:30,136 ...the governor, James T. Applewhite! 1073 01:24:30,386 --> 01:24:32,680 Thank you. Thank you. 1074 01:24:34,015 --> 01:24:35,641 Ladies and gentlemen... 1075 01:24:35,808 --> 01:24:40,813 ...welcome to the 70th Annual Hazzard Road Rally! 1076 01:24:43,107 --> 01:24:46,194 Drivers, start your engines! 1077 01:24:57,288 --> 01:25:01,667 Just have a couple piña coladas waiting for me at the finish line, Dil. 1078 01:25:01,834 --> 01:25:03,544 Here comes the heat. 1079 01:25:07,548 --> 01:25:09,258 There they go. 1080 01:25:15,306 --> 01:25:17,266 Come on, come on, come on. 1081 01:25:38,246 --> 01:25:40,164 He's in the race! 1082 01:26:11,529 --> 01:26:14,866 It has been confirmed that the orange car that entered the race... 1083 01:26:15,033 --> 01:26:17,910 ...is in fact the same car that tore up Atlanta this morning. 1084 01:26:18,077 --> 01:26:22,165 It seems that the "orange-car fugitives" are from right here in Hazzard County. 1085 01:26:22,373 --> 01:26:25,376 State and local authorities are trying to subdue the vehicle... 1086 01:26:25,543 --> 01:26:27,170 ...known as the General Lee. 1087 01:26:27,336 --> 01:26:31,215 Well, General-Lee speaking, I'd say those cops are in for a pretty tough time. 1088 01:26:31,382 --> 01:26:33,509 I'm Rick Shakely. Back to you, Marty. 1089 01:26:39,140 --> 01:26:42,351 This is Boss Hogg. The Dukes are on the course. 1090 01:26:42,518 --> 01:26:48,441 I want all available vehicles to shut down the road to the courthouse! 1091 01:26:48,608 --> 01:26:50,985 - We're gonna need to clear a path. - You got it. 1092 01:26:54,697 --> 01:26:58,993 Hey, Dil, what's the word on those Céline Dion tickets? 1093 01:26:59,994 --> 01:27:04,082 Well, of course I wanna go backstage. Don't be dumb. 1094 01:27:56,384 --> 01:27:57,552 Damn. 1095 01:28:10,815 --> 01:28:14,944 Enos. I want you down to the courthouse. I... 1096 01:28:16,487 --> 01:28:17,947 Someone moved my car. 1097 01:28:19,824 --> 01:28:23,786 Enos, you dipstick, did somebody move my car? 1098 01:28:24,328 --> 01:28:27,457 Hell, let's just sack up and shoot the bastard. 1099 01:28:30,001 --> 01:28:32,628 Holy shit! 1100 01:28:33,129 --> 01:28:35,131 Luke, where the hell are you? 1101 01:28:50,772 --> 01:28:53,691 - Good God almighty. - It's about time! 1102 01:28:53,858 --> 01:28:56,694 - How's the race going? - How's it look like it's going? 1103 01:29:44,575 --> 01:29:46,119 Why, you dirty son of a bitch. 1104 01:29:49,914 --> 01:29:51,666 Hey, go easy on that. 1105 01:29:51,833 --> 01:29:55,837 For what I'm getting ready to do, I don't wanna remember a lot of it. 1106 01:30:02,218 --> 01:30:04,011 You know why tornadoes and blonds... 1107 01:30:04,178 --> 01:30:06,222 ...are so much alike? - No. 1108 01:30:06,389 --> 01:30:11,060 At first, there's a lot of sucking and blowing, and then you lose your house. 1109 01:30:16,190 --> 01:30:19,026 Know what you get when you cross a donkey with an onion? 1110 01:30:19,193 --> 01:30:20,737 - No. - You get a piece of ass... 1111 01:30:20,945 --> 01:30:23,865 ...that'll bring a tear to your eye. 1112 01:30:28,786 --> 01:30:30,371 You thinking about throwing it? 1113 01:30:30,538 --> 01:30:32,749 Oh, I'll throw it. I was thinking about pussy. 1114 01:30:40,548 --> 01:30:42,675 You know why divorces are so expensive? 1115 01:30:42,842 --> 01:30:45,428 - No. - Because they're worth it. 1116 01:30:48,389 --> 01:30:50,433 Fire in the hole. 1117 01:30:56,355 --> 01:31:00,109 Hey, Bo, take it home. The coast is clear. 1118 01:31:12,038 --> 01:31:13,915 Here we go again. 1119 01:31:14,082 --> 01:31:16,250 Okay, I'm gonna get those cops to follow me. 1120 01:31:16,417 --> 01:31:19,253 When I do, tow those cruisers out of the way. 1121 01:31:19,420 --> 01:31:21,339 Can do. 1122 01:31:35,395 --> 01:31:38,481 Excuse me, officers. My car broke down up the street there... 1123 01:31:38,648 --> 01:31:40,942 ...and I was wondering if y'all could help me out. 1124 01:31:41,109 --> 01:31:44,028 Why, yes, ma'am. We'll be happy to. 1125 01:31:44,195 --> 01:31:47,573 - Oh, you're sweet. - Let's go. 1126 01:31:48,116 --> 01:31:51,661 Halt! Tough shit, honey. You go fix your own car. 1127 01:31:51,828 --> 01:31:53,413 Ain't no one going anywhere. 1128 01:31:54,372 --> 01:31:56,499 What the hell are you doing? 1129 01:32:06,759 --> 01:32:08,052 Come on, General. 1130 01:32:39,459 --> 01:32:41,794 Hey, Dil, we got a late arrival! 1131 01:32:51,429 --> 01:32:53,139 Hey, Billy! 1132 01:33:03,107 --> 01:33:05,443 You're gonna pay for that, Bo-Bo. 1133 01:33:09,655 --> 01:33:12,116 I've had just about enough of you. 1134 01:33:24,545 --> 01:33:25,838 Here they come. 1135 01:33:41,771 --> 01:33:44,440 Of course I can feel him on my left! Of course I can! 1136 01:33:49,362 --> 01:33:52,573 - Where is he getting this from? - Hey, Billy! 1137 01:33:52,740 --> 01:33:54,158 He's playing with me! 1138 01:34:02,083 --> 01:34:04,752 - Come on. - The General Lee has won the race. 1139 01:34:06,379 --> 01:34:07,964 I want him tested for steroids! 1140 01:34:11,759 --> 01:34:14,804 But Billy Prickett and the General Lee haven't had quite enough driving. 1141 01:34:15,012 --> 01:34:16,931 They're still going. 1142 01:34:18,391 --> 01:34:20,643 - Come on, y'all! - We'll interview these guys... 1143 01:34:20,810 --> 01:34:23,896 ...if we have to chase after them ourselves. Tito, start the van. 1144 01:34:24,439 --> 01:34:26,357 Better luck next time, Hogg. 1145 01:34:26,524 --> 01:34:28,067 Let's go, baby. 1146 01:34:35,825 --> 01:34:37,827 Don't go home, really. 1147 01:34:40,038 --> 01:34:42,081 This is Boss Hogg. 1148 01:34:42,248 --> 01:34:47,086 That road better be shut down tighter than a tick's ass. 1149 01:34:47,754 --> 01:34:50,214 Ten-four. Barricade's in place. 1150 01:34:56,137 --> 01:34:58,264 Rosco, is anyone coming? 1151 01:34:58,848 --> 01:35:02,935 - What, I ain't good enough for you? - No comment. 1152 01:35:04,395 --> 01:35:06,981 Don't write that down. Don't write that down. 1153 01:35:07,148 --> 01:35:10,193 - Are they coming? - Oh, yeah, they're coming. 1154 01:35:10,359 --> 01:35:12,862 We got the whole town headed to the courthouse. 1155 01:35:14,072 --> 01:35:17,325 - Daisy, we all clear? - Not exactly. 1156 01:35:17,492 --> 01:35:20,078 "Not exactly" could be a problem. 1157 01:35:20,244 --> 01:35:24,415 Bo? I think we're gonna have to shoot the moon. 1158 01:35:39,889 --> 01:35:42,392 - What the hell are you doing, Cooter? - Sorry, officer. 1159 01:35:42,600 --> 01:35:44,560 I heard a pretty lady needed a tow. 1160 01:35:47,688 --> 01:35:50,608 - Cooter. - I can't hear you. 1161 01:35:50,775 --> 01:35:53,194 Cooter, what the hell are you doing? 1162 01:36:01,244 --> 01:36:03,621 Hey, Billy! 1163 01:36:03,788 --> 01:36:05,873 You think I was born yesterday, Bo-Bo? 1164 01:36:07,125 --> 01:36:09,127 Oh, shit! 1165 01:36:17,385 --> 01:36:19,095 Holy shit. 1166 01:36:35,570 --> 01:36:38,239 Luke, I made it, but I don't know how anybody else will. 1167 01:36:38,406 --> 01:36:41,284 That's okay, I got an idea! 1168 01:36:45,121 --> 01:36:46,956 Well, I'll see you on the other side. 1169 01:37:02,180 --> 01:37:04,265 Give me your goddamn driver's license. 1170 01:37:04,432 --> 01:37:06,184 What license? 1171 01:37:13,024 --> 01:37:15,651 What are we waiting on, judge? Let's finish this thing. 1172 01:37:15,860 --> 01:37:17,695 Well, I guess it's that time. 1173 01:37:17,862 --> 01:37:20,782 I just can't believe that nobody wants to object. 1174 01:37:22,200 --> 01:37:25,953 All those in favor of the strip-mining ordinance? 1175 01:37:27,705 --> 01:37:30,083 - They're gonna strip-mine Hazzard? - Damn straight. 1176 01:37:30,249 --> 01:37:34,629 - How can they do that? - Don't worry, we're about to stop them. 1177 01:37:35,797 --> 01:37:37,840 All those opposed? 1178 01:37:39,801 --> 01:37:42,428 What the hell is that? Who locked that door? 1179 01:37:46,891 --> 01:37:49,477 - Oh, man, that's gonna hurt tomorrow. - Your Honor! 1180 01:37:49,644 --> 01:37:54,148 I think we got some people who might like to object to this strip-mining issue. 1181 01:37:54,565 --> 01:37:58,027 Okay, all those opposed to the strip-mining ordinance? 1182 01:38:01,072 --> 01:38:06,828 This court hereby declares that the strip-mining ordinance is dismissed. 1183 01:38:12,250 --> 01:38:15,378 Thank you much. Thank you, Boss. Hi, how y'all? 1184 01:38:15,586 --> 01:38:18,339 She might be a little low on gas. 1185 01:38:18,506 --> 01:38:20,466 Take that. 1186 01:38:21,592 --> 01:38:24,971 Were you really gonna strip-mine Hazzard, Mr. Hogg? 1187 01:38:25,763 --> 01:38:28,349 I was thinking about it. 1188 01:38:29,976 --> 01:38:31,769 - Out of the way. - Step aside, please. 1189 01:38:31,936 --> 01:38:33,312 Excuse me, ma'am. 1190 01:38:34,689 --> 01:38:36,983 - Get your hands up. - People, move back. 1191 01:38:37,150 --> 01:38:38,735 Hands up, hands up. 1192 01:38:38,943 --> 01:38:42,321 Okay. Looks like the party's over. 1193 01:38:42,488 --> 01:38:45,575 Damn right it is. As long as I'm a county commissioner... 1194 01:38:45,742 --> 01:38:48,619 ...for the great state of Georgia, you two are gonna rot... 1195 01:38:48,786 --> 01:38:51,247 ...in the penitentiary. Cuff him. 1196 01:38:52,498 --> 01:38:53,791 Let them go! 1197 01:38:54,125 --> 01:38:55,877 Let them go! 1198 01:38:56,044 --> 01:38:59,422 Excuse me, Rick Shakely. I think the governor has a statement to make. 1199 01:38:59,589 --> 01:39:01,466 - Well, hot dog. - I do? 1200 01:39:01,632 --> 01:39:04,093 Yes, sir. You wanted to comment on how these boys... 1201 01:39:04,302 --> 01:39:06,596 ...are the heroes for saving Hazzard County. 1202 01:39:06,763 --> 01:39:09,766 - That's right, governor! - Come on, governor! 1203 01:39:11,184 --> 01:39:13,144 Certainly, certainly. 1204 01:39:13,311 --> 01:39:16,898 As you know, I've always been a great friend to the environment. 1205 01:39:17,356 --> 01:39:20,276 And these boys, they're environmental heroes! 1206 01:39:22,028 --> 01:39:26,157 And because they're heroes, you're gonna pardon them for all their crimes? 1207 01:39:29,660 --> 01:39:32,747 Moreover, as governor, I hereby pardon these boys... 1208 01:39:32,914 --> 01:39:36,876 ...of any and all offenses against the great state of Georgia. Go Dogs! 1209 01:39:40,129 --> 01:39:43,800 Governor? I wanna thank you for pardoning me too. 1210 01:39:43,966 --> 01:39:47,011 - Pardon you for what? - For this. 1211 01:39:51,808 --> 01:39:54,310 Oh, what the hell. I pardon him too. 1212 01:39:56,521 --> 01:40:00,108 Here's to Hazzard County's real favorite sons. 1213 01:40:03,611 --> 01:40:06,656 The day had been saved, as they say. 1214 01:40:06,823 --> 01:40:09,492 Hazzard was put back the way it was. 1215 01:40:09,659 --> 01:40:12,370 Boss Hogg had some explaining to do. 1216 01:40:12,537 --> 01:40:15,039 And the Dukes got their farm back and celebrated... 1217 01:40:15,206 --> 01:40:18,584 ... with a good old-fashioned pig-picking barbecue. 1218 01:40:18,751 --> 01:40:21,838 Hey, Billy. Daisy, I think you ought to get up there and sing. 1219 01:40:22,046 --> 01:40:25,758 - Oh, no. I only sing in the shower. - I'll get the water running. 1220 01:40:25,925 --> 01:40:28,386 - Let's get Uncle Jesse to do it. - Good idea. 1221 01:40:28,553 --> 01:40:31,889 Pauline, where's Uncle Jesse? We want him to sing a song. 1222 01:40:32,056 --> 01:40:35,226 I think I might know where he is. 1223 01:40:39,355 --> 01:40:40,606 An apple? 1224 01:40:40,898 --> 01:40:43,735 An apple a day will keep the doctor away, darling. 1225 01:40:43,901 --> 01:40:46,904 Come on, Jesse, they want you to sing. 1226 01:40:47,071 --> 01:40:50,908 - Real refreshing. - They are, aren't they? 1227 01:41:00,835 --> 01:41:02,545 It feels like old times again. 1228 01:41:02,754 --> 01:41:06,424 Yeah, except for now we don't gotta worry about Bo finding out. 1229 01:41:06,591 --> 01:41:10,094 I swear you're the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. 1230 01:41:10,261 --> 01:41:13,097 - You're sweet. - Yeah. 1231 01:41:13,264 --> 01:41:15,433 I would really like to give you a bath later. 1232 01:41:15,600 --> 01:41:17,810 Clean you up real nice. Would you like that? 1233 01:41:17,977 --> 01:41:21,189 - I'd like that. - Yeah. Yeah. 1234 01:41:21,355 --> 01:41:25,151 Don't worry about her. She's crazy. 1235 01:41:31,616 --> 01:41:33,201 Hey there, Laurie. 1236 01:41:33,368 --> 01:41:36,412 You forgot to make your delivery this week, Luke Duke. 1237 01:41:36,954 --> 01:41:40,083 - Go, Bo, go. - Luke, you man-whore. 1238 01:41:40,833 --> 01:41:43,419 You get back here, you bastard! 1239 01:41:43,628 --> 01:41:45,046 See y'all later. 1240 01:41:59,143 --> 01:42:00,770 Okay, this is A-camera marker. 1241 01:42:00,978 --> 01:42:04,065 - Actually, she's my cousin. - That don't make a difference to me. 1242 01:42:04,232 --> 01:42:08,236 Hell, long as she's your sister. What the fuck did I just say? 1243 01:42:13,324 --> 01:42:17,161 Don't you know you're not supposed to wear white after Labor Day? 1244 01:42:20,123 --> 01:42:22,208 - Come on, cut that out. - Seann. 1245 01:42:22,375 --> 01:42:24,544 Do I need to mark this thing? 1246 01:42:24,711 --> 01:42:26,087 It's called common markers. 1247 01:42:26,254 --> 01:42:28,631 I wonder if Richard Burton ever had to do that. 1248 01:43:10,715 --> 01:43:14,302 What the fuck? That's the kiss you guys are having? 1249 01:43:14,469 --> 01:43:17,346 What the fuck? I'm a total fucking moron. 1250 01:43:17,513 --> 01:43:20,183 - It gets longer and longer, doesn't it? - Come on. 1251 01:43:20,349 --> 01:43:23,853 How these boys are the heroes for... Oh, my Lord. 1252 01:43:24,062 --> 01:43:27,482 Every time I look at her titties, she loses her line. 1253 01:43:29,525 --> 01:43:32,028 - I love it except for the hair in your eyes. - I know. 1254 01:43:32,195 --> 01:43:34,155 - How's my hair? - Okay. 1255 01:43:34,322 --> 01:43:36,449 How'd you miss that? 1256 01:43:36,741 --> 01:43:40,036 - Gonna take your hands off the wheel? - He showed me his balls. 1257 01:43:40,203 --> 01:43:42,997 Sorry. Okay, okay. We'll do it again. Okay, keep going. 1258 01:43:43,164 --> 01:43:45,083 For your... 1259 01:43:47,001 --> 01:43:49,879 - Don't tell me, it rhymes with "anus." - Heinous. 1260 01:43:50,046 --> 01:43:52,340 For your heinous crimes. 1261 01:43:52,507 --> 01:43:55,551 Have you been running this around the clock, Uncle Jesse? 1262 01:44:05,436 --> 01:44:09,357 Did I say "shit" or "hell" that time? With "ass" or "dick"? I said "hell"? 1263 01:44:11,109 --> 01:44:14,779 Dang it, a little help. A little help. 1264 01:44:16,114 --> 01:44:18,616 - Cut it. - Cut. 1265 01:44:18,783 --> 01:44:23,913 Come on, be a bro, be a bro. Get it away! Come on. Get it away! 1266 01:44:24,080 --> 01:44:25,748 - Move over. - Hey. 1267 01:44:25,957 --> 01:44:29,210 - There weren't any bananas. - Oh, that's okay. 1268 01:44:30,211 --> 01:44:34,132 - Where's Bo? - To hell with Bo, it's Boo! 1269 01:44:34,298 --> 01:44:35,758 Lunch! 1270 01:44:41,055 --> 01:44:42,807 Thank you very much. 1271 01:44:44,684 --> 01:44:47,770 Look at me, I'm flying. I'm flying! 1272 01:44:47,979 --> 01:44:51,399 Oh, it's so much fun. I'm okay 97097