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1
00:00:04,143 --> 00:00:05,677
Ooh, look at this apartment.
2
00:00:05,678 --> 00:00:08,046
I mean, they want $1,100,
but it's worth it.
3
00:00:08,047 --> 00:00:10,515
Are you kidding?
Look at the size of that fridge.
4
00:00:10,516 --> 00:00:11,683
It's tiny.
5
00:00:12,685 --> 00:00:14,686
That's a wine fridge, Elly May.
6
00:00:15,888 --> 00:00:17,122
Oh, hey, look.
7
00:00:17,123 --> 00:00:18,990
This place has got one of those,
8
00:00:18,991 --> 00:00:22,627
and it's got three bedrooms,
a bay window,
9
00:00:22,628 --> 00:00:24,796
a fireplace, hardwood floors,
10
00:00:24,797 --> 00:00:26,297
it's in our price range.
11
00:00:26,298 --> 00:00:27,832
Something's got to be wrong.
12
00:00:27,833 --> 00:00:29,200
Let me check.
13
00:00:29,201 --> 00:00:30,368
Oh, yep.
14
00:00:30,369 --> 00:00:33,037
Sex offender a block away.
15
00:00:33,038 --> 00:00:35,306
But he exposed himself in a library,
16
00:00:35,307 --> 00:00:36,775
so that doesn't really affect us.
17
00:00:37,943 --> 00:00:39,744
Hey, guys.
18
00:00:39,745 --> 00:00:40,845
I've got a surprise.
19
00:00:40,846 --> 00:00:43,281
We're going to Mexico!
20
00:00:43,282 --> 00:00:45,550
Thank you, Jackie.
I was about to tell them that.
21
00:00:45,551 --> 00:00:47,552
Oh, fine, well, you tell them
22
00:00:47,553 --> 00:00:50,155
how we're going to
the border bridge in El Paso
23
00:00:50,156 --> 00:00:52,023
so that Emilio can meet Beverly Rose
24
00:00:52,024 --> 00:00:53,625
for the very first time.
25
00:00:55,661 --> 00:00:57,228
Oh, damn it. I did it again.
26
00:00:58,297 --> 00:00:59,564
Well, this seems very sudden.
27
00:00:59,565 --> 00:01:01,399
Uh, who's gonna run the restaurant?
28
00:01:01,400 --> 00:01:03,802
Oh, well, uh,
Emilio had a couple days off,
29
00:01:03,803 --> 00:01:05,537
so it seemed like a good time,
30
00:01:05,538 --> 00:01:08,373
and DJ said that he would cover for us
until we got back.
31
00:01:08,374 --> 00:01:10,875
Uh, you're aware that DJ's gonna be
32
00:01:10,876 --> 00:01:13,211
doing magic tricks
for the customers, right?
33
00:01:13,212 --> 00:01:15,446
You know what's great for a restaurant?
34
00:01:15,447 --> 00:01:17,849
A filthy dove walking across your plate
35
00:01:17,850 --> 00:01:20,585
while you try to eat a tuna melt.
36
00:01:20,586 --> 00:01:21,986
Gotta go. Bye.
37
00:01:25,524 --> 00:01:27,559
- Hey, Becky.
- Yeah?
38
00:01:27,560 --> 00:01:29,194
How can you afford this trip?
39
00:01:29,195 --> 00:01:32,163
Emilio's tías are paying
for the gas and hotels.
40
00:01:32,164 --> 00:01:34,599
Hey, look, I know they're
putting pressure on you
41
00:01:34,600 --> 00:01:36,701
to marry him and make him legal,
42
00:01:36,702 --> 00:01:38,670
but you're not really thinking
of doing that, are you?
43
00:01:38,671 --> 00:01:40,371
Becky is not gonna fake some marriage
44
00:01:40,372 --> 00:01:42,407
just to get Emilio into the country.
45
00:01:42,408 --> 00:01:43,908
My God, it would make it impossible
46
00:01:43,909 --> 00:01:46,744
for her to meet
and date anybody for two years,
47
00:01:46,745 --> 00:01:48,680
which is the amount of time
they have to spend
48
00:01:48,681 --> 00:01:52,183
to pretend being married
to fool the government.
49
00:01:52,184 --> 00:01:54,185
Why are you so wired?
50
00:01:54,186 --> 00:01:57,722
I just finished off
122-hour energy drinks
51
00:01:57,723 --> 00:01:59,224
so that I'm, uh...
52
00:01:59,225 --> 00:02:01,759
I'm good to drive for... 24 hours.
53
00:02:01,760 --> 00:02:03,828
It doesn't really work that way.
54
00:02:03,829 --> 00:02:05,964
They don't kick in one after the other.
55
00:02:05,965 --> 00:02:07,065
It's all at the same time.
56
00:02:07,066 --> 00:02:08,266
So now you're just gonna be
57
00:02:08,267 --> 00:02:09,767
on the verge of having a heart attack
58
00:02:09,768 --> 00:02:10,802
for the next two hours.
59
00:02:10,803 --> 00:02:11,936
Oh, my God, you're right.
60
00:02:11,937 --> 00:02:13,905
That explains the thumping in my head.
61
00:02:13,906 --> 00:02:14,973
It's my heart.
62
00:02:14,974 --> 00:02:16,007
Let's get on the road.
63
00:02:17,963 --> 00:02:20,164
She's such a scatterbrain.
64
00:02:20,165 --> 00:02:22,900
I don't know how she makes it
from one day to the next.
65
00:02:28,841 --> 00:02:30,374
Baby.
66
00:02:33,078 --> 00:02:34,178
Thanks again
67
00:02:34,179 --> 00:02:36,314
for the ride from the grocery store.
68
00:02:36,315 --> 00:02:37,381
It would've been hard
69
00:02:37,382 --> 00:02:38,950
walking back with all this stuff.
70
00:02:38,951 --> 00:02:41,552
Well, I was driving down the street
71
00:02:41,553 --> 00:02:44,021
and I-I saw this sad old man
72
00:02:44,022 --> 00:02:45,923
struggling with a couple grocery bags.
73
00:02:47,659 --> 00:02:52,096
And I thought,
"Hey, there's my boyfriend...
74
00:02:52,097 --> 00:02:54,665
and his face isn't the right color."
75
00:02:54,666 --> 00:02:56,934
When I get my truck out of the shop,
76
00:02:56,935 --> 00:02:59,070
my face will be the right color
all the time.
77
00:03:00,372 --> 00:03:01,472
When are you getting it back?
78
00:03:01,473 --> 00:03:02,974
As soon as I give 'em
79
00:03:02,975 --> 00:03:05,209
all the money I have left in the bank.
80
00:03:05,210 --> 00:03:07,011
I may be at the point
of going to the mall
81
00:03:07,012 --> 00:03:09,914
and hurling myself down the escalator.
82
00:03:09,915 --> 00:03:12,150
Well, there's nobody in the mall.
83
00:03:12,151 --> 00:03:14,919
You'll lay there for days.
84
00:03:14,920 --> 00:03:17,788
Hey, uh, you wanna
catch a movie or somethin'?
85
00:03:17,789 --> 00:03:20,224
I can't. I got some stuff to do.
86
00:03:20,225 --> 00:03:21,526
Uh, I'll see you later.
87
00:03:23,128 --> 00:03:25,263
You don't have stuff.
88
00:03:25,264 --> 00:03:26,964
Why are you trying to get rid of me?
89
00:03:26,965 --> 00:03:29,934
It's embarrassing.
90
00:03:29,935 --> 00:03:31,102
I got to go to the bank.
91
00:03:31,103 --> 00:03:32,503
They're foreclosing on the house.
92
00:03:34,139 --> 00:03:35,273
Oh, my God.
93
00:03:35,274 --> 00:03:38,943
Well, why didn't you tell me?
We're a couple now.
94
00:03:38,944 --> 00:03:41,913
We're supposed to be there
for each other.
95
00:03:41,914 --> 00:03:42,914
You're right.
96
00:03:42,915 --> 00:03:44,115
Gimme $4,000.
97
00:03:45,951 --> 00:03:48,052
I don't have it.
98
00:03:48,053 --> 00:03:51,956
But I have cleavage,
and I know how to use it.
99
00:03:51,957 --> 00:03:54,058
Alright, let's go.
100
00:03:54,059 --> 00:03:56,127
Better to have 'em and not need 'em
101
00:03:56,128 --> 00:03:57,628
than need 'em and not have 'em.
102
00:03:59,598 --> 00:04:02,667
sync and correction by solfieri
www.addic7ed.com
103
00:04:02,668 --> 00:04:10,441
The Conners - S02E20 - Season Finale
Bridge Over Troubled Conners
104
00:04:35,791 --> 00:04:39,453
"The Conners" is recorded in
front of a live studio audience.
105
00:04:39,459 --> 00:04:42,227
Well, thanks for coming with me
to look at apartments, guys.
106
00:04:42,228 --> 00:04:45,063
- Wow!
- Nice.
107
00:04:45,064 --> 00:04:48,034
It's even better than the pictures.
108
00:04:48,036 --> 00:04:49,871
Look at all the architectural details.
109
00:04:51,073 --> 00:04:52,907
You don't get this
in the newer buildings.
110
00:04:52,908 --> 00:04:54,008
Oh, I love it.
111
00:04:54,009 --> 00:04:56,711
I'm hungry.
How long's this gonna be?
112
00:04:56,712 --> 00:04:58,179
You said we were going somewhere to eat.
113
00:04:58,180 --> 00:04:59,714
We're here. Nobody's home.
114
00:04:59,715 --> 00:05:01,182
Go to the fridge
and get whatever you want.
115
00:05:01,183 --> 00:05:05,620
But before you go, um, Darlene...
116
00:05:05,621 --> 00:05:06,921
Yeah, I think this is it.
117
00:05:06,922 --> 00:05:08,222
Alright, let's do it.
118
00:05:08,223 --> 00:05:12,026
Guys, Ben and I are moving in together,
119
00:05:12,027 --> 00:05:14,395
and if we get this place,
120
00:05:14,396 --> 00:05:16,531
we're legally obligated
to bring you with us!
121
00:05:19,168 --> 00:05:20,501
Together.
122
00:05:21,870 --> 00:05:23,070
W-Why aren't you guys excited?
123
00:05:23,071 --> 00:05:25,039
Because we've been through this before.
124
00:05:25,040 --> 00:05:27,542
You said we were going
to move to Chicago with Ben,
125
00:05:27,543 --> 00:05:29,043
and that didn't happen.
126
00:05:29,044 --> 00:05:30,244
One of you is gonna sleep with Dad
127
00:05:30,245 --> 00:05:32,813
and screw this up.
128
00:05:33,949 --> 00:05:37,018
Well, it is kinda my turn.
129
00:05:37,019 --> 00:05:39,754
You know what,
that's not gonna happen this time.
130
00:05:39,755 --> 00:05:41,522
Go explore, have fun.
131
00:05:42,891 --> 00:05:44,592
Yeah.
132
00:05:44,593 --> 00:05:45,927
Guy. There's a guy.
133
00:05:45,928 --> 00:05:48,162
There's a guy in there.
134
00:05:48,163 --> 00:05:50,198
It's okay. I'm Cyril.
135
00:05:50,199 --> 00:05:51,399
I live here.
136
00:05:51,400 --> 00:05:54,969
So, feel free to, uh,
look around, but quietly.
137
00:05:54,970 --> 00:05:57,104
I just got the bird to sleep.
138
00:05:58,307 --> 00:06:00,741
Relationships, am I right?
139
00:06:02,277 --> 00:06:03,978
Oh, uh, you have a bird?
140
00:06:03,979 --> 00:06:07,114
I'm so tired of hearing that.
141
00:06:07,115 --> 00:06:09,650
No, I don't have a bird.
142
00:06:09,651 --> 00:06:11,118
I'm with a bird.
143
00:06:11,119 --> 00:06:13,120
We share the space.
144
00:06:13,121 --> 00:06:15,323
We're equals.
145
00:06:18,927 --> 00:06:22,763
So... Cyril, um...
146
00:06:22,764 --> 00:06:25,366
why are you leaving such a great place?
147
00:06:25,367 --> 00:06:27,969
Originally, there were three of us.
148
00:06:27,970 --> 00:06:30,671
Uh, but Pretty Bird passed,
149
00:06:30,672 --> 00:06:33,207
and now it's just me
and Mrs. Featherbottom.
150
00:06:34,543 --> 00:06:36,744
She just can't be around
all the memories.
151
00:06:38,113 --> 00:06:41,115
So, how soon will you
and Mrs. Featherbottom
152
00:06:41,116 --> 00:06:42,250
be leaving the apartment?
153
00:06:42,251 --> 00:06:43,584
Uh, I haven't broken it to her yet.
154
00:06:43,585 --> 00:06:45,119
She's been here
since this was my mom's place.
155
00:06:45,120 --> 00:06:46,120
Yeah.
156
00:06:46,121 --> 00:06:48,155
She still hasn't gotten over her death.
157
00:06:48,156 --> 00:06:50,157
Wake up, Mommy.
158
00:06:50,158 --> 00:06:51,392
Wake up, Mommy.
159
00:06:57,799 --> 00:07:00,167
He would be so perfect for Jackie.
160
00:07:06,875 --> 00:07:09,510
Wow. Wish I had a bank like this.
161
00:07:09,511 --> 00:07:11,912
I took a sandwich into my bank once,
162
00:07:11,913 --> 00:07:14,048
and they wouldn't even cash my check.
163
00:07:14,049 --> 00:07:16,651
'Course, I didn't have any money.
164
00:07:16,652 --> 00:07:19,053
This ham represents
40 years of friendship.
165
00:07:19,054 --> 00:07:21,122
Jim helped me buy that house.
166
00:07:21,123 --> 00:07:24,058
And the day we closed,
I brought him a ham.
167
00:07:24,059 --> 00:07:25,393
Now every time I have a problem,
168
00:07:25,394 --> 00:07:27,094
I bring him a ham, and he helps me out.
169
00:07:29,331 --> 00:07:30,731
- Hey, Jim!
- Hey, Dan.
170
00:07:30,732 --> 00:07:34,835
Oh, Mr. Potter!
171
00:07:34,836 --> 00:07:36,570
- Uh, this is Louise.
- Hi.
172
00:07:36,571 --> 00:07:39,640
And you remember ham.
173
00:07:39,641 --> 00:07:41,809
Of course.
174
00:07:41,810 --> 00:07:43,210
Ham was at my wedding.
175
00:07:43,211 --> 00:07:46,080
See, this is so great.
176
00:07:46,081 --> 00:07:48,516
Big business has gotten so faceless,
177
00:07:48,517 --> 00:07:51,686
but you guys are just,
"Hey neighbor, got a problem.
178
00:07:51,687 --> 00:07:53,954
Here's a ham."
179
00:07:53,955 --> 00:07:55,222
Well, you know why I'm here.
180
00:07:55,223 --> 00:07:56,290
I just... I need another month.
181
00:07:56,291 --> 00:07:57,658
Or two.
182
00:07:57,659 --> 00:07:59,193
Maybe three.
183
00:07:59,194 --> 00:08:02,096
But I won't take four unless you insist.
184
00:08:03,365 --> 00:08:06,033
Look, Dan, I'd love to help you out,
185
00:08:06,034 --> 00:08:07,368
but I can't this time.
186
00:08:07,369 --> 00:08:08,469
What?
187
00:08:09,771 --> 00:08:11,505
Come on, Jim. You're kidding, right?
188
00:08:11,506 --> 00:08:13,407
You know they're gonna take my house.
189
00:08:13,408 --> 00:08:15,309
Yeah, I know that, Dan.
190
00:08:15,310 --> 00:08:17,278
Y-You don't think I wanna help ya?
191
00:08:17,279 --> 00:08:19,280
Hey, Dan's good for the money.
192
00:08:19,281 --> 00:08:21,749
Tell Jim about
that big apartment complex
193
00:08:21,750 --> 00:08:24,418
you just bid on over on Spaulding.
194
00:08:24,419 --> 00:08:26,020
It's huge.
195
00:08:26,021 --> 00:08:28,255
And the apartments all have walls,
196
00:08:28,256 --> 00:08:30,257
which is great for a drywaller.
197
00:08:30,258 --> 00:08:32,593
Isn't that right, Dan?
198
00:08:32,594 --> 00:08:34,228
That is right, Louise.
199
00:08:34,229 --> 00:08:35,663
Thank you, girls.
200
00:08:38,834 --> 00:08:40,901
Look, i-i-it's not up to me anymore.
201
00:08:40,902 --> 00:08:42,236
You know, we got bought out,
202
00:08:42,237 --> 00:08:44,805
and I'm just trying to hang on myself.
203
00:08:44,806 --> 00:08:48,342
You know, they want somebody
cheaper and younger in my spot.
204
00:08:48,343 --> 00:08:50,878
So they tell me what to do, and I do it.
205
00:08:50,879 --> 00:08:52,747
Well, they told you to screw me over.
206
00:08:52,748 --> 00:08:56,283
No, they told me that
you're an unacceptable risk.
207
00:08:56,284 --> 00:08:57,551
They got an algorithm now.
208
00:08:57,552 --> 00:08:59,120
An algorithm.
209
00:08:59,121 --> 00:09:00,621
So I'm a number now.
210
00:09:00,622 --> 00:09:03,758
I got some machine telling me
get out of my damn house.
211
00:09:03,759 --> 00:09:05,159
My whole family's living there!
212
00:09:05,160 --> 00:09:07,828
Where are they supposed to...
213
00:09:11,666 --> 00:09:13,768
That's not your problem.
214
00:09:13,769 --> 00:09:15,569
Thanks anyway, Jim.
215
00:09:15,570 --> 00:09:17,438
I'm sorry. Hey, tell Gail I said hi.
216
00:09:29,979 --> 00:09:32,580
Look, it's your daddy!
217
00:09:32,581 --> 00:09:35,183
Mi amor!
218
00:09:35,184 --> 00:09:38,820
Ay. Ay, que lindisima.
219
00:09:38,821 --> 00:09:41,689
Oh.
220
00:09:41,690 --> 00:09:44,159
I can't believe
I'm actually holding her.
221
00:09:46,061 --> 00:09:47,662
She's so wonderful.
222
00:09:47,663 --> 00:09:48,963
You think that's good,
223
00:09:48,964 --> 00:09:50,231
you should change some diapers.
224
00:09:50,232 --> 00:09:52,000
It's transcendent.
225
00:09:52,001 --> 00:09:55,003
Thank you for driving all this way.
226
00:09:55,004 --> 00:09:56,271
Oh.
227
00:09:57,373 --> 00:09:59,541
Your tías were so helpful.
228
00:09:59,542 --> 00:10:01,910
They even gave us little medals
with saints on them
229
00:10:01,911 --> 00:10:03,711
to "take care of us."
230
00:10:03,712 --> 00:10:06,147
I used one to scratch off
a lottery ticket in Missouri.
231
00:10:06,148 --> 00:10:07,715
I won 10 bucks,
232
00:10:07,716 --> 00:10:10,418
so shout-out to St. Christopher.
233
00:10:10,419 --> 00:10:14,656
We are going to have a great day.
234
00:10:14,657 --> 00:10:16,691
I can't wait to show you Parque Central.
235
00:10:16,692 --> 00:10:21,129
Oh, my mother gave me her earrings
236
00:10:21,130 --> 00:10:22,897
for Beverly Rose.
237
00:10:22,898 --> 00:10:24,966
They're real gold with little diamonds.
238
00:10:24,967 --> 00:10:28,336
These are so nice.
239
00:10:28,337 --> 00:10:30,872
Uh, I'll just put them
in my ears for safe keeping
240
00:10:30,873 --> 00:10:32,707
'til she turns 18.
241
00:10:35,044 --> 00:10:36,945
- Oh, yes.
- Yes, baby.
242
00:10:36,946 --> 00:10:38,947
We're in Mexico.
243
00:10:43,319 --> 00:10:45,620
Hey. Is my dad around?
244
00:10:45,621 --> 00:10:48,056
We saw the greatest apartment yesterday,
245
00:10:48,057 --> 00:10:49,290
and it's super close by.
246
00:10:49,291 --> 00:10:50,992
We got to tell him.
247
00:10:50,993 --> 00:10:52,627
Yeah, I brought him some beer
to celebrate.
248
00:10:52,628 --> 00:10:54,796
You know, it's not every day
your little 43-year-old girl
249
00:10:54,797 --> 00:10:56,164
leaves the nest.
250
00:10:57,866 --> 00:10:59,367
Uh...
251
00:10:59,368 --> 00:11:00,735
That's great, you guys.
252
00:11:00,736 --> 00:11:03,271
Uh, look, before you tell your dad,
253
00:11:03,272 --> 00:11:05,206
I got to give you a heads-up.
254
00:11:05,207 --> 00:11:07,175
He's in trouble with the mortgage.
255
00:11:07,176 --> 00:11:09,010
The bank's gonna take the house.
256
00:11:09,011 --> 00:11:10,845
Well, he talked to Jim, right?
257
00:11:10,846 --> 00:11:12,847
He brought the ham?
258
00:11:12,848 --> 00:11:14,215
Yeah.
259
00:11:14,216 --> 00:11:15,583
Yeah, it didn't work.
260
00:11:15,584 --> 00:11:17,118
He owes four grand.
261
00:11:17,119 --> 00:11:19,120
Four grand?!
262
00:11:19,121 --> 00:11:21,256
How the hell did he get that far behind?
263
00:11:21,257 --> 00:11:22,991
I don't know.
264
00:11:22,992 --> 00:11:24,959
You know, work's been slow.
265
00:11:24,960 --> 00:11:28,196
Sometimes things just pile up on ya.
266
00:11:28,197 --> 00:11:29,264
He's too proud to tell you,
267
00:11:29,265 --> 00:11:30,898
but I thought you should know.
268
00:11:33,035 --> 00:11:35,003
Damn.
269
00:11:35,004 --> 00:11:37,572
Just never ends for you guys.
270
00:11:37,573 --> 00:11:40,375
One of your ancestors
mess with a witch or somethin'?
271
00:11:42,611 --> 00:11:45,146
I'm not gonna let my dad lose his house.
272
00:11:45,147 --> 00:11:46,581
I hear ya.
273
00:11:46,582 --> 00:11:48,016
Maybe we could, you know,
274
00:11:48,017 --> 00:11:49,284
sell some more ads for the magazine,
275
00:11:49,285 --> 00:11:50,685
put together a few bucks.
276
00:11:50,686 --> 00:11:55,556
Or... we use our deposit money
for the new apartment
277
00:11:55,557 --> 00:11:56,624
to bail him out.
278
00:11:58,160 --> 00:11:59,527
Where are we supposed to go?
279
00:11:59,528 --> 00:12:02,463
Well, we could live here...
I mean, just for a while...
280
00:12:02,464 --> 00:12:03,965
And help with the mortgage payments
281
00:12:03,966 --> 00:12:05,266
just until he gets back on his feet.
282
00:12:05,267 --> 00:12:08,736
Look, Darlene, I know you love your dad,
283
00:12:08,737 --> 00:12:10,138
and so do I,
284
00:12:10,139 --> 00:12:13,041
but it's not gonna be
for a little while.
285
00:12:13,042 --> 00:12:16,978
Um, he is a 65-year-old
construction guy,
286
00:12:16,979 --> 00:12:20,348
and he's not just gonna suddenly
start making more money.
287
00:12:20,349 --> 00:12:23,584
Look, I-I'm sorry. My dad needs me.
288
00:12:23,585 --> 00:12:25,153
Darlene.
289
00:12:25,154 --> 00:12:28,323
Look, I don't want to live here, okay?
290
00:12:28,324 --> 00:12:30,558
We finally agreed to move in together
291
00:12:30,559 --> 00:12:32,193
so we can start our own life.
292
00:12:32,194 --> 00:12:34,162
Now, what, you're gonna
make me the bad guy
293
00:12:34,163 --> 00:12:36,197
'cause I don't wanna
move into your childhood home?
294
00:12:36,198 --> 00:12:38,299
Look, we can't lose this house.
295
00:12:38,300 --> 00:12:40,168
It will kill my dad.
296
00:12:40,169 --> 00:12:42,670
And every memory I have is here.
297
00:12:42,671 --> 00:12:45,640
Staying up all night,
fighting with Becky in our room,
298
00:12:45,641 --> 00:12:47,742
teaching DJ how to sled down the stairs
299
00:12:47,743 --> 00:12:49,010
on a piece of cardboard.
300
00:12:50,079 --> 00:12:54,248
I mean, this is the last place
I saw my mom alive.
301
00:12:54,249 --> 00:12:56,250
I don't want some other family
moving in here
302
00:12:56,251 --> 00:12:57,685
and erasing all those memories.
303
00:12:57,686 --> 00:13:01,089
Hey, look, those memories are in you.
304
00:13:01,090 --> 00:13:03,358
They are not in this house.
305
00:13:03,359 --> 00:13:05,093
Now, I know that this is hard for you,
306
00:13:05,094 --> 00:13:08,262
but it is not the kids' job
to rescue the parents
307
00:13:08,263 --> 00:13:10,765
at the expense of their own lives.
308
00:13:10,766 --> 00:13:12,567
You can't save everybody.
309
00:13:12,568 --> 00:13:14,102
Yeah, of course you feel that way now,
310
00:13:14,103 --> 00:13:16,104
but eventually, your parents
will need help, too,
311
00:13:16,105 --> 00:13:18,106
and I will do whatever it takes.
312
00:13:18,107 --> 00:13:19,340
But you won't have to,
313
00:13:19,341 --> 00:13:21,109
because my parents
have paid off their house,
314
00:13:21,110 --> 00:13:23,277
they have a fat pension
and long-term health insurance.
315
00:13:25,447 --> 00:13:27,448
Well, tell those arrogant bastards
316
00:13:27,449 --> 00:13:29,717
to get over here, grab a
bucket, and start bailing,
317
00:13:29,718 --> 00:13:32,453
'cause the Conners are going down!
318
00:13:35,657 --> 00:13:37,558
That was really fun.
319
00:13:37,559 --> 00:13:39,227
The people here are so nice,
320
00:13:39,228 --> 00:13:41,195
and I noticed the tequila's so cheap!
321
00:13:41,196 --> 00:13:42,830
The people here are so nice
322
00:13:42,831 --> 00:13:45,199
because the tequila's so cheap.
323
00:13:45,200 --> 00:13:48,136
Well, I'm glad I didn't come here
when I was a drunk.
324
00:13:48,137 --> 00:13:49,604
I would've died.
325
00:13:49,605 --> 00:13:54,008
Hey, you being a drunk wasn't all bad.
326
00:13:54,009 --> 00:13:56,310
We made a beautiful baby.
327
00:13:56,311 --> 00:13:58,079
Yeah, we did.
328
00:14:00,749 --> 00:14:03,251
Uh, well, I guess we got to go.
329
00:14:06,155 --> 00:14:08,756
Goodbye, Beverly Rose.
330
00:14:12,795 --> 00:14:14,462
There you go.
331
00:14:14,463 --> 00:14:16,230
Yes.
332
00:14:16,231 --> 00:14:18,332
I might not be there
to watch you grow up...
333
00:14:19,601 --> 00:14:22,370
...but I promise to FaceTime you
as much as I can.
334
00:14:23,639 --> 00:14:25,273
Te amo, mi amor.
335
00:14:25,274 --> 00:14:28,342
Que dios te bendiga.
336
00:14:28,343 --> 00:14:30,812
This won't be the last time you see her.
337
00:14:30,813 --> 00:14:33,381
I'll come back, like, every few months.
338
00:14:33,382 --> 00:14:35,683
No, you won't.
339
00:14:35,684 --> 00:14:38,319
You can't afford to,
and I understand that.
340
00:14:38,320 --> 00:14:41,055
I will.
341
00:14:41,056 --> 00:14:43,124
You'll see.
342
00:14:48,397 --> 00:14:50,231
Bye, Emilio.
343
00:14:57,706 --> 00:15:00,208
So, do you wanna get married?
344
00:15:07,637 --> 00:15:12,231
If you're looking for all those weird
ice crystals, so I made the kids eat it.
345
00:15:15,709 --> 00:15:16,876
Holy crap.
346
00:15:16,877 --> 00:15:18,144
What happened?
347
00:15:18,145 --> 00:15:21,047
A guy owed me money for a drywall job,
348
00:15:21,048 --> 00:15:22,949
and he wouldn't pay me in full.
349
00:15:22,950 --> 00:15:24,717
We negotiated,
350
00:15:24,718 --> 00:15:26,820
and we thought the best way to settle it
351
00:15:26,821 --> 00:15:29,622
was to punch each other in the face.
352
00:15:29,623 --> 00:15:31,591
I got 200 bucks out of it, though.
353
00:15:31,592 --> 00:15:32,826
Whoa.
354
00:15:32,827 --> 00:15:34,160
What's the other guy look like?
355
00:15:34,161 --> 00:15:37,430
Oh, about 6'1", brown hair,
356
00:15:37,431 --> 00:15:41,167
pretty good-looking,
'til he had the broken nose.
357
00:15:41,168 --> 00:15:43,069
Dad, you can't go around
beating people up
358
00:15:43,070 --> 00:15:44,270
who owe you money
359
00:15:44,271 --> 00:15:46,139
just to keep the bank
from taking the house.
360
00:15:46,140 --> 00:15:48,274
Damn it, Louise shouldn't have
told you that.
361
00:15:48,275 --> 00:15:49,342
Well, I'm glad she did.
362
00:15:49,343 --> 00:15:50,410
I want to help you out.
363
00:15:50,411 --> 00:15:51,978
You already help me out!
364
00:15:51,979 --> 00:15:54,147
I don't see anybody else around here
365
00:15:54,148 --> 00:15:57,750
filling up old water bottles
with gas station hand soap.
366
00:15:57,751 --> 00:15:59,586
I'm talking about the mortgage.
367
00:15:59,587 --> 00:16:00,987
You don't have the money.
368
00:16:00,988 --> 00:16:04,090
Well, you know what,
I'll... I'll sell my car,
369
00:16:04,091 --> 00:16:05,091
and I'll take the bus.
370
00:16:05,092 --> 00:16:06,092
I'll get a second job.
371
00:16:06,093 --> 00:16:07,260
I'll go back to the casino.
372
00:16:07,261 --> 00:16:08,928
I will do whatever it takes
373
00:16:08,929 --> 00:16:10,029
so that we don't fall behind again.
374
00:16:10,030 --> 00:16:11,264
No, you're not doing that.
375
00:16:11,265 --> 00:16:13,566
Your dad's right.
376
00:16:13,567 --> 00:16:17,070
You're not doing that.
377
00:16:17,071 --> 00:16:19,973
We're doing that.
378
00:16:19,974 --> 00:16:22,842
Now, together, Darlene and I have enough
379
00:16:22,843 --> 00:16:24,777
to pull you out of the hole,
380
00:16:24,778 --> 00:16:27,280
and then, you know,
we'll take over the mortgage.
381
00:16:27,281 --> 00:16:28,715
No, you won't.
382
00:16:28,716 --> 00:16:30,149
Mark told me about the apartment.
383
00:16:30,150 --> 00:16:32,118
I'm not taking your deposit money.
384
00:16:32,119 --> 00:16:33,887
I will not be a burden on you kids.
385
00:16:33,888 --> 00:16:36,189
No, you're not a burden.
386
00:16:36,190 --> 00:16:37,323
I mean, you always figured out a way
387
00:16:37,324 --> 00:16:38,625
to keep this roof over our heads.
388
00:16:38,626 --> 00:16:39,792
It's our turn now.
389
00:16:39,793 --> 00:16:41,327
The bank's not taking my house.
390
00:16:41,328 --> 00:16:43,062
You're not taking my house.
391
00:16:43,063 --> 00:16:44,297
I will figure something out.
392
00:16:44,298 --> 00:16:46,366
Don't be so stubborn, Dan.
393
00:16:46,367 --> 00:16:48,835
Look, we're helping ya, and that's that.
394
00:16:48,836 --> 00:16:50,603
I already kicked a couple asses today.
395
00:16:50,604 --> 00:16:52,105
Don't make me kick yours. Boop!
396
00:16:58,078 --> 00:17:00,213
That was a hero moment
397
00:17:00,214 --> 00:17:02,582
that was super unsatisfying.
398
00:17:04,685 --> 00:17:06,185
Not to me.
399
00:17:06,186 --> 00:17:07,453
Thank you.
400
00:17:11,191 --> 00:17:14,093
Hey, you don't think he's crazy enough
401
00:17:14,094 --> 00:17:15,895
to let the bank come for the house
402
00:17:15,896 --> 00:17:18,131
instead of taking our help?
403
00:17:18,132 --> 00:17:19,332
Well, you know,
404
00:17:19,333 --> 00:17:21,067
we've got a little time to work on him
405
00:17:21,068 --> 00:17:22,569
before the eviction.
406
00:17:22,570 --> 00:17:24,704
He's probably got about six months
407
00:17:24,705 --> 00:17:26,139
before the house sells at auction.
408
00:17:26,140 --> 00:17:28,508
Now, that's when the sheriff comes
and grabs your dad,
409
00:17:28,509 --> 00:17:30,209
drags him out kicking and screaming.
410
00:17:30,210 --> 00:17:31,878
And, of course, if he has
any weapons in the house,
411
00:17:31,879 --> 00:17:33,746
it could end up being a SWAT situation.
412
00:17:33,747 --> 00:17:35,848
And as I understand it,
if the guy has a shot,
413
00:17:35,849 --> 00:17:37,917
he'll take the shot.
414
00:17:39,687 --> 00:17:42,255
Uh, your "everything
is gonna be alright" speech
415
00:17:42,256 --> 00:17:43,256
needs some work.
416
00:17:45,759 --> 00:17:48,494
! Hola, mi familia!
417
00:17:48,495 --> 00:17:51,230
- Hey!
- Oh!
418
00:17:51,231 --> 00:17:52,732
How was Mexico?
419
00:17:52,733 --> 00:17:54,400
It was good.
420
00:17:54,401 --> 00:17:56,235
I dropped Jackie off at home.
421
00:17:56,236 --> 00:17:57,870
God, that woman can talk.
422
00:17:58,739 --> 00:18:00,373
Oh, she was going on and on
423
00:18:00,374 --> 00:18:03,876
about how she used to date
Dr. Seuss back in the day,
424
00:18:03,877 --> 00:18:05,411
40 years ago,
425
00:18:05,412 --> 00:18:07,680
but he would never reveal
his true identity.
426
00:18:08,949 --> 00:18:10,617
She claims she did him on a plane.
427
00:18:10,618 --> 00:18:13,820
She swears she did him on a train.
428
00:18:13,821 --> 00:18:16,155
- Heeey!
- Hey. Hey, welcome back, Becky.
429
00:18:16,156 --> 00:18:17,156
Hey, Beck.
430
00:18:17,157 --> 00:18:19,125
- Hey!
- Mm.
431
00:18:19,126 --> 00:18:20,226
How was the trip?
432
00:18:20,227 --> 00:18:21,761
Yeah, how's Emilio doing?
433
00:18:21,762 --> 00:18:24,597
Uh, he's changed a little bit.
434
00:18:24,598 --> 00:18:26,399
Um, he's married now.
435
00:18:26,400 --> 00:18:28,334
Sorry, Becky.
436
00:18:28,335 --> 00:18:29,936
Don't be.
437
00:18:29,937 --> 00:18:31,170
He's married to me.
438
00:18:33,907 --> 00:18:35,608
What the hell are you talking about?
439
00:18:35,609 --> 00:18:38,378
Uh... I don't know.
440
00:18:38,379 --> 00:18:40,480
I saw Emilio with Beverly Rose,
441
00:18:40,481 --> 00:18:42,315
and I thought,
442
00:18:42,316 --> 00:18:44,751
how would I feel if I couldn't see her?
443
00:18:44,752 --> 00:18:46,319
And I then I said, "Don't look back,
444
00:18:46,320 --> 00:18:47,654
don't look back, don't look back."
445
00:18:47,655 --> 00:18:49,756
And then I did...
446
00:18:49,757 --> 00:18:51,524
and then I married him.
447
00:18:52,926 --> 00:18:55,028
Wow.
448
00:18:55,029 --> 00:18:56,129
So, he's moving in?
449
00:18:56,130 --> 00:18:57,463
Relax.
450
00:18:57,464 --> 00:18:59,465
He has to stay in Mexico for two years
451
00:18:59,466 --> 00:19:01,634
while we pretend
we're in a real marriage.
452
00:19:01,635 --> 00:19:03,636
Then he can get a waiver to come back.
453
00:19:03,637 --> 00:19:06,172
Oh, you better be damn careful.
454
00:19:06,173 --> 00:19:07,440
You're breaking the law.
455
00:19:07,441 --> 00:19:09,208
They could throw you in jail.
456
00:19:09,209 --> 00:19:11,911
Ooh, diamonds.
457
00:19:11,912 --> 00:19:13,479
If you go to jail,
458
00:19:13,480 --> 00:19:14,514
I can wear those earrings
459
00:19:14,515 --> 00:19:17,116
to keep 'em safe while you're gone.
460
00:19:26,794 --> 00:19:28,561
Hola, Becky.
461
00:19:30,464 --> 00:19:32,365
What are you doing here?
462
00:19:32,366 --> 00:19:34,033
Once I held Beverly Rose, I realized
463
00:19:34,034 --> 00:19:36,202
I didn't want to miss
any more of her life.
464
00:19:36,203 --> 00:19:39,405
Emilio, the point of us getting married
465
00:19:39,406 --> 00:19:41,274
was so you could come back legally
466
00:19:41,275 --> 00:19:43,843
and be part of Beverly Rose's life.
467
00:19:43,844 --> 00:19:46,646
If they catch you here,
you'll be banned forever.
468
00:19:46,647 --> 00:19:48,715
You're supposed to be in Mexico.
469
00:19:48,716 --> 00:19:50,450
Check it out. I am.
470
00:19:51,552 --> 00:19:53,219
Here is me in Juarez
471
00:19:53,220 --> 00:19:55,822
celebrating 2021
with my New Year's glasses.
472
00:19:57,191 --> 00:19:59,726
Here's me in Juarez
gaining a little weight
473
00:19:59,727 --> 00:20:01,794
in the winter 2021
474
00:20:01,795 --> 00:20:05,832
and then taking off the weight
in the summer.
475
00:20:05,833 --> 00:20:08,735
It's a good thing
you took off the weight,
476
00:20:08,736 --> 00:20:11,404
because you're gonna have
to run from immigration
477
00:20:11,405 --> 00:20:13,339
when they catch you here!
478
00:20:13,340 --> 00:20:14,340
Go now!
479
00:20:14,341 --> 00:20:15,708
It's late!
480
00:20:15,709 --> 00:20:17,844
There's no traffic!
481
00:20:17,845 --> 00:20:19,812
I'll be fine.
482
00:20:19,813 --> 00:20:21,180
I'll be staying with my tías.
483
00:20:21,181 --> 00:20:23,583
But right now, I really want
to see Beverly Rose.
484
00:20:25,352 --> 00:20:26,686
Okay.
485
00:20:26,687 --> 00:20:29,922
But you showing up here
without telling me is wrong.
486
00:20:31,225 --> 00:20:33,126
This lack of communication
487
00:20:33,127 --> 00:20:35,561
does not bode well
for our fake marriage.
488
00:20:40,783 --> 00:20:43,922
Bienvenidos. Bien...
489
00:20:43,924 --> 00:20:45,452
Uh, uh, uh, uh, quick question.
490
00:20:45,454 --> 00:20:46,988
Is this where you're teaching your kids
491
00:20:46,989 --> 00:20:49,291
how to appropriate
somebody else's culture?
492
00:20:49,292 --> 00:20:51,259
Yeah, I'll bet you can't wait
to get home,
493
00:20:51,260 --> 00:20:52,460
"talk in an accent,"
494
00:20:52,461 --> 00:20:54,396
put those sombreros down on the ground,
495
00:20:54,397 --> 00:20:57,432
dance around them while
your kids shake the maracas.
496
00:20:57,433 --> 00:20:59,267
You know who can't afford
those maracas...
497
00:20:59,268 --> 00:21:00,802
The kids that make the maracas.
498
00:21:00,803 --> 00:21:02,270
Yeah, keep walkin'.
499
00:21:02,271 --> 00:21:04,172
Bienvenidos.
500
00:21:05,174 --> 00:21:07,809
Oh, classic. Piñatas.
501
00:21:07,810 --> 00:21:09,010
You gonna take those home
502
00:21:09,011 --> 00:21:11,179
to your little entitled
white-kid family?
503
00:21:11,180 --> 00:21:12,480
Alright, go ahead.
504
00:21:12,481 --> 00:21:15,317
Shout "Ay-yi-yi,"
beat the burro with a stick.
505
00:21:15,318 --> 00:21:17,719
Latinos come in all colors.
506
00:21:17,720 --> 00:21:19,621
We're Mexican, dumb-ass.
507
00:21:19,622 --> 00:21:21,790
Ohh.
9999
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00
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