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1
00:00:01,120 --> 00:00:05,220
♪♪
2
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:07,130
[ Yelling in slow-motion ]
3
00:00:07,150 --> 00:00:10,110
Candice: This wasn't how it was
supposed to go.
4
00:00:10,130 --> 00:00:14,050
I just wanted to
make a little cash,
5
00:00:14,070 --> 00:00:15,160
have a little fun.
6
00:00:17,230 --> 00:00:21,080
But sometimes,
even the best plans...
7
00:00:21,100 --> 00:00:23,220
can leave a skid-mark
in your shorts.
8
00:00:25,179 --> 00:00:29,119
To understand
how we got here,
9
00:00:29,140 --> 00:00:32,110
you've gotta know the legend.
10
00:00:32,130 --> 00:00:35,130
The legend...
11
00:00:35,149 --> 00:00:37,079
of Sauceface.
12
00:00:37,100 --> 00:00:43,230
♪♪
13
00:00:44,009 --> 00:00:50,129
♪♪
14
00:00:50,149 --> 00:00:52,129
[ School bell rings ]
15
00:00:52,149 --> 00:00:55,199
[ Both laughing ]
16
00:00:55,219 --> 00:00:57,049
Whoa!
17
00:00:57,070 --> 00:01:01,100
Imagine all the fun
we could have with one of those.
18
00:01:01,119 --> 00:01:05,049
Those drones make hopscotch
look like foursquare.
19
00:01:05,069 --> 00:01:06,079
Mom!
Mom!
20
00:01:06,099 --> 00:01:07,229
Can I get a drone?
Please, please!
21
00:01:08,010 --> 00:01:10,070
I'd fly it every day
and I'd wash it and I'd feed it!
22
00:01:10,090 --> 00:01:12,030
And it would get us involved
in stem fields
23
00:01:12,049 --> 00:01:15,029
where girls are traditionally
underrepresented.
24
00:01:15,049 --> 00:01:16,049
[ Sighs ]
25
00:01:16,069 --> 00:01:17,149
I wish we could,
sweetie,
26
00:01:17,170 --> 00:01:19,120
but we don't have the money
for stuff like that.
27
00:01:19,140 --> 00:01:20,230
Yeah, right, Mom.
28
00:01:21,010 --> 00:01:23,130
Then why do we live in a mansion
with Alex and Bridgette?
29
00:01:23,150 --> 00:01:25,040
Oh, jeez.
30
00:01:25,060 --> 00:01:28,180
Candice, the "house" we live in
is an apartment building.
31
00:01:28,200 --> 00:01:31,080
And Alex and Bridgette only live
with us to help us pay for it.
32
00:01:31,099 --> 00:01:34,069
But you have a job,
and Dad has a job.
33
00:01:34,090 --> 00:01:35,120
Doesn't that
make us rich?
34
00:01:35,140 --> 00:01:36,120
No.
35
00:01:36,140 --> 00:01:39,130
Wait, so we're...
36
00:01:39,150 --> 00:01:40,200
poor?
37
00:01:40,219 --> 00:01:43,099
Man, I had no idea
we were poor.
38
00:01:43,120 --> 00:01:45,020
Do your mom and dad
have money?
39
00:01:45,039 --> 00:01:47,039
No, my dad
does improv.
40
00:01:47,060 --> 00:01:49,130
[ Inhales sharply ]
Ooh, I'm so sorry.
41
00:01:49,150 --> 00:01:52,200
Let's face it,
drones are for rich kids.
42
00:01:52,219 --> 00:01:54,129
Attencion,
everyone.
43
00:01:54,150 --> 00:01:57,130
It's your friendly cafeteria
conduct liaison.
44
00:01:57,150 --> 00:01:59,210
Effective immediately
our school's banned food list
45
00:01:59,229 --> 00:02:01,099
will now include
General Tso's chicken,
46
00:02:01,120 --> 00:02:03,090
because it promotes
militarism.
47
00:02:03,109 --> 00:02:07,019
♪♪
48
00:02:07,040 --> 00:02:08,150
And please, don't push me
on this.
49
00:02:08,169 --> 00:02:11,089
Stellan and I just broke up
and he took the Peloton
50
00:02:11,110 --> 00:02:12,170
because he technically
paid for it,
51
00:02:12,189 --> 00:02:14,199
even though I use it way
more than he does.
52
00:02:14,219 --> 00:02:18,189
So, it's a whole thing.
Okay, buon appetito!
53
00:02:18,210 --> 00:02:20,010
Oh, stop, stop,
stop, stop!
54
00:02:20,030 --> 00:02:23,100
Don't let Campbell
see that.
55
00:02:23,120 --> 00:02:25,160
All the food at this school
is so bland.
56
00:02:25,180 --> 00:02:27,090
I'll give you a quarter
for your hot sauce.
57
00:02:27,110 --> 00:02:29,090
Hmm, one quarter?
58
00:02:29,110 --> 00:02:31,070
I'll give you
two dimes.
59
00:02:31,090 --> 00:02:33,100
Whoa!
Now we're talking!
60
00:02:33,120 --> 00:02:36,170
Maddie, I think I know
how we can buy a drone.
61
00:02:36,189 --> 00:02:38,209
[ The Rolling Stones' "Can't You
Hear Me Knocking" plays ]
62
00:02:38,229 --> 00:02:41,149
Candice: And that's how we got
into the hot sauce game.
63
00:02:41,170 --> 00:02:45,040
I'd harvest the product
at home...
64
00:02:45,060 --> 00:02:47,000
and we'd move it at school.
65
00:02:47,020 --> 00:02:53,060
♪♪
66
00:02:53,079 --> 00:02:59,089
♪♪
67
00:02:59,110 --> 00:03:01,170
♪ Yeah, you got
satin shoes ♪
68
00:03:01,189 --> 00:03:03,109
Candice:
It was red gold, baby.
69
00:03:03,129 --> 00:03:04,219
Red gold.
70
00:03:05,000 --> 00:03:08,020
Maddie had a head for numbers,
so she ran the books.
71
00:03:08,039 --> 00:03:11,999
♪ ...plastic boots ♪
72
00:03:12,020 --> 00:03:18,040
♪ Y'all got cocaine eyes ♪
73
00:03:18,060 --> 00:03:21,050
Whoo!
I got lightning in my brain!
74
00:03:21,069 --> 00:03:24,009
Candice: Pretty soon, we had
other kids dealing for us.
75
00:03:24,030 --> 00:03:25,140
First graders, second graders,
76
00:03:25,159 --> 00:03:28,029
a fourth grader we called
Jimmy Two-Times
77
00:03:28,050 --> 00:03:32,040
'cause once he peed himself
two times in the same day.
78
00:03:32,060 --> 00:03:36,160
The way we were going, we had
enough for a fleet of drones.
79
00:03:36,180 --> 00:03:39,160
Business was so good,
it was only a matter of time
80
00:03:39,180 --> 00:03:43,130
'til the cafeteria
conduct liaison got wise.
81
00:03:46,020 --> 00:03:48,090
♪ Help me, baby ♪
82
00:03:48,110 --> 00:03:50,030
Picante!
83
00:03:50,050 --> 00:03:52,140
Candice: We needed to throw
Campbell off our trail.
84
00:03:52,159 --> 00:03:54,029
Who do you work for?
85
00:03:54,050 --> 00:03:55,110
[ Packets splat ]
86
00:03:55,129 --> 00:03:57,089
♪ Ain't no stranger ♪
87
00:03:57,110 --> 00:04:00,110
So, I came up with an alter ego
to take the heat.
88
00:04:00,129 --> 00:04:03,149
A big boss named Sauceface.
89
00:04:03,169 --> 00:04:05,059
[ Whistles ]
90
00:04:06,169 --> 00:04:10,019
♪ Can't you hear my knockin'? ♪
91
00:04:10,039 --> 00:04:13,039
Candice:
Tomorrow is the big sit-down
with our sister schools.
92
00:04:13,060 --> 00:04:16,200
If all goes well, we expand our
operations all over the city.
93
00:04:16,220 --> 00:04:19,100
I don't like it.
Campbell is closing in.
94
00:04:19,120 --> 00:04:21,150
We need to lie low.
Please.
95
00:04:21,170 --> 00:04:23,110
Mr. Campbell
couldn't find a butt
96
00:04:23,129 --> 00:04:24,129
on his own butt.
97
00:04:24,149 --> 00:04:26,119
Candice, we have
plenty of money
98
00:04:26,139 --> 00:04:28,109
and we haven't even
bought our drone yet.
99
00:04:28,129 --> 00:04:31,019
Isn't that why we started
this in the first place?
100
00:04:31,040 --> 00:04:33,000
We move forward
with the sit-down.
101
00:04:33,019 --> 00:04:34,159
There are more dimes
to be made.
102
00:04:34,180 --> 00:04:39,080
Speaking of, this last payment
was supposed to have 873 dimes,
103
00:04:39,100 --> 00:04:42,040
which is exactly
$5,000.
104
00:04:42,060 --> 00:04:43,220
But we're
four dimes short.
105
00:04:44,000 --> 00:04:46,160
Which one of you
is skimming off the top?
106
00:04:46,180 --> 00:04:48,070
You don't want to
confess to me?
107
00:04:48,090 --> 00:04:51,040
Okay. Perhaps
you'd rather tell...
108
00:04:51,060 --> 00:04:52,060
Wet Willy?
109
00:04:52,079 --> 00:04:59,109
♪♪
110
00:04:59,129 --> 00:05:00,169
Why, Jade,
111
00:05:00,189 --> 00:05:03,019
that's a very nice
Ring Pop you're wearing.
112
00:05:03,040 --> 00:05:05,050
It -- It was a gift
from my Nan-Nan.
113
00:05:05,069 --> 00:05:07,149
Right.
Nan-Nans are the best.
114
00:05:07,170 --> 00:05:11,220
Yeah.
Yeah, my Nan-Nan's...
Gotcha.
My Nan-Nan loves me so much.
115
00:05:12,000 --> 00:05:12,230
[ Screams ]
116
00:05:13,009 --> 00:05:14,069
Hey, cut it out!
117
00:05:14,089 --> 00:05:16,059
Never cross me again,
Jade.
118
00:05:16,079 --> 00:05:19,099
Aah!
[ Sobbing ]
119
00:05:19,120 --> 00:05:20,230
Jeez, Candice.
120
00:05:21,009 --> 00:05:22,189
I'm not Candice
anymore.
121
00:05:22,209 --> 00:05:25,069
I'm...
Sauceface.
122
00:05:27,050 --> 00:05:28,090
Ah, that's our time.
123
00:05:28,110 --> 00:05:30,210
Remember, tomorrow
is Cher Day,
124
00:05:30,230 --> 00:05:32,060
so bring in a small item
125
00:05:32,079 --> 00:05:34,189
that makes you believe
in life after love.
126
00:05:34,209 --> 00:05:37,179
Ethan, please stay behind
for uno minuto.
127
00:05:37,199 --> 00:05:39,199
Ooh!
Ooh!
Ooh!
128
00:05:40,159 --> 00:05:42,189
Relax, Ethan,
you're not in trouble.
129
00:05:42,209 --> 00:05:46,019
I just wanted to offer you
a little after-school snack.
130
00:05:49,000 --> 00:05:51,150
Oh...
131
00:05:52,100 --> 00:05:53,100
Mmm...
132
00:05:53,120 --> 00:05:56,200
Red pepper, salt, garlic,
Xanthan gum.
133
00:05:56,220 --> 00:05:58,190
You want it,
don't you, Ethan?
134
00:06:00,120 --> 00:06:01,220
[ Breathing heavily ]
135
00:06:02,000 --> 00:06:03,210
First, tell me
everything you know.
136
00:06:03,230 --> 00:06:05,010
Okay.
137
00:06:05,029 --> 00:06:06,179
When mommies and daddies
love each other,
138
00:06:06,199 --> 00:06:08,119
they touch their butts together
and a baby --
139
00:06:08,139 --> 00:06:10,119
No, Ethan.
Everything about Sauceface.
140
00:06:10,139 --> 00:06:12,129
Like where I can find him
or her or them.
141
00:06:12,149 --> 00:06:15,029
I guess I did hear somebody say
a thingy was gonna go down
142
00:06:15,050 --> 00:06:17,150
tomorrow in that room
where I eat all the paint.
143
00:06:17,170 --> 00:06:20,040
[ Gasps ]
The art room!
144
00:06:23,100 --> 00:06:24,220
Gracias, Ethan.
145
00:06:30,189 --> 00:06:32,139
You all know me,
what I do.
146
00:06:32,159 --> 00:06:34,099
And you know what I can
do for you.
147
00:06:34,120 --> 00:06:35,170
[ Snaps fingers ]
148
00:06:38,060 --> 00:06:41,040
I think we could be very
motivated to move this product
149
00:06:41,060 --> 00:06:43,120
at Temple Beth Emet
Day School.
150
00:06:44,209 --> 00:06:47,149
Yeah, samesies
for Mayflower Charter.
151
00:06:47,170 --> 00:06:50,060
Excellent.
Then let's shake on it.
152
00:06:50,079 --> 00:06:52,099
Mr. Campbell:
Sauceface!
153
00:06:52,120 --> 00:06:54,010
I know
you're in there!
154
00:06:54,029 --> 00:06:56,159
And as soon as I figure out
which key opens this door,
155
00:06:56,180 --> 00:06:58,020
I'm coming in!
156
00:06:58,040 --> 00:06:59,190
You set us up!
No!
157
00:06:59,209 --> 00:07:01,079
Someone ratted us out!
158
00:07:01,100 --> 00:07:04,120
Why did I announce I was here
before I found the key?
159
00:07:04,139 --> 00:07:05,229
So stupid!
160
00:07:06,009 --> 00:07:17,159
♪♪
161
00:07:17,180 --> 00:07:29,080
♪♪
162
00:07:29,100 --> 00:07:32,000
Candice!
[ Grunts ]
163
00:07:35,000 --> 00:07:35,220
Ah!
164
00:07:36,000 --> 00:07:37,150
Candice, you need
to run!
165
00:07:37,170 --> 00:07:39,010
But --
Now!
166
00:07:39,029 --> 00:07:45,089
♪♪
167
00:07:45,110 --> 00:07:47,150
Well, well, well...
168
00:07:47,170 --> 00:07:49,210
If it isn't Sauceface.
169
00:07:49,230 --> 00:07:51,180
[ Gasps ]
No!
170
00:07:53,189 --> 00:07:55,129
This is it for me.
171
00:07:55,149 --> 00:07:57,039
Campbell called in
my parents.
172
00:07:57,060 --> 00:07:58,140
I'm gonna be expelled.
173
00:07:58,159 --> 00:08:01,129
But why didn't you tell him
you're not Sauceface?
174
00:08:01,149 --> 00:08:02,139
And be a rat?
175
00:08:02,160 --> 00:08:04,010
Maddie, I'm so sorry!
176
00:08:04,029 --> 00:08:07,089
I want to fix this, to go back
to how things were before.
177
00:08:07,110 --> 00:08:08,230
We knew the risks
of this life.
178
00:08:09,009 --> 00:08:10,129
Forget about me,
Candice.
179
00:08:10,149 --> 00:08:14,209
Take the money, buy the drone,
make a new best friend.
180
00:08:14,230 --> 00:08:16,070
Mr. Campbell:
Stellan, you agreed
181
00:08:16,089 --> 00:08:18,999
I could visit the Peloton
on Tuesdays and Thursdays.
182
00:08:19,019 --> 00:08:21,129
My calves are
withering away!
183
00:08:22,209 --> 00:08:33,109
♪♪
184
00:08:33,129 --> 00:08:35,219
Thus proving she's guilty
of possession
185
00:08:36,000 --> 00:08:37,220
of banned goods,
illegal sales,
186
00:08:38,000 --> 00:08:40,150
and naming herself
after an R-rated movie.
187
00:08:40,169 --> 00:08:43,019
These are mostly
serious charges.
188
00:08:43,039 --> 00:08:45,139
Maddie,
I'm stunned.
189
00:08:45,159 --> 00:08:48,059
I don't want to recommend
expulsion.
190
00:08:48,080 --> 00:08:50,150
But I'm afraid it's the only way
to close the book
191
00:08:50,169 --> 00:08:53,179
on this dark chapter of--
what the butt?
192
00:08:53,200 --> 00:08:54,210
No!
193
00:08:54,230 --> 00:08:57,020
If you're --
then who is--
194
00:08:57,039 --> 00:08:58,229
Mr. Campbell,
it would seem
195
00:08:59,009 --> 00:09:01,219
that you busted
the wrong Sauceface.
196
00:09:02,000 --> 00:09:04,230
Ah! I can't believe I missed
my Harold audition for this!
197
00:09:05,009 --> 00:09:06,039
Ted, it's been
three years.
198
00:09:06,059 --> 00:09:08,039
You're not getting
on a house team.
199
00:09:08,059 --> 00:09:10,059
Sauceface!
200
00:09:12,149 --> 00:09:16,219
[ Children laughing ]
201
00:09:17,000 --> 00:09:18,030
Hey!
202
00:09:18,049 --> 00:09:26,059
♪♪
203
00:09:26,080 --> 00:09:34,060
♪♪
204
00:09:34,080 --> 00:09:36,210
Ha!
You're cornered, Sauceface!
205
00:09:41,169 --> 00:09:42,209
Surprise!
206
00:09:42,230 --> 00:09:45,150
What?
I don't understand.
207
00:09:45,169 --> 00:09:47,009
You're Sauceface?
208
00:09:47,029 --> 00:09:49,159
You mean
"Project Sauceface"?
209
00:09:49,179 --> 00:09:51,069
That was our code name.
210
00:09:51,090 --> 00:09:54,100
Maddie and I sold sauce so
we could buy you a new Peloton.
211
00:09:54,120 --> 00:09:56,160
We know how hard it's been
with Stellan gone.
212
00:09:56,179 --> 00:10:00,029
And, well, you're
our favorite teacher.
213
00:10:00,049 --> 00:10:01,079
That's right.
214
00:10:01,100 --> 00:10:02,230
We had to keep it
a surprise.
215
00:10:03,009 --> 00:10:04,199
It was our plan
all along.
216
00:10:04,220 --> 00:10:08,030
[ Voice breaking ]
This is the nicest thing
anyone's ever done for me.
217
00:10:08,049 --> 00:10:10,109
Did we break the rules?
Yes.
218
00:10:10,129 --> 00:10:12,179
But it was the only way
we could earn money,
219
00:10:12,200 --> 00:10:15,090
and sometimes
you have to break some rules
220
00:10:15,110 --> 00:10:17,080
to mend
a broken heart.
221
00:10:17,100 --> 00:10:19,000
Mm...
222
00:10:19,019 --> 00:10:21,119
Wait a second! Five
minutes ago, you were
gonna expel my daughter!
223
00:10:21,139 --> 00:10:23,039
That was before
the children gave me,
224
00:10:23,059 --> 00:10:25,049
like, a $2,000
exercise bike.
225
00:10:25,070 --> 00:10:27,080
So, you were able to
buy this thing
226
00:10:27,100 --> 00:10:29,090
just from selling
hot sauce packets?
227
00:10:29,110 --> 00:10:31,130
Yeah, kids really
love hot sauce.
228
00:10:31,149 --> 00:10:34,109
In that case,
the ban is lifted.
229
00:10:34,129 --> 00:10:36,149
The school is selling
those packets now.
230
00:10:36,169 --> 00:10:39,049
We need that money for
Coach Gary's settlement.
231
00:10:39,070 --> 00:10:43,000
Candice: And just like that,
Sauceface was no more.
232
00:10:43,019 --> 00:10:48,059
In the end I gave up my wealth,
my business, my spicy empire...
233
00:10:48,080 --> 00:10:49,130
for friendship.
234
00:10:49,149 --> 00:10:51,189
The richest score of them all.
235
00:10:51,210 --> 00:10:52,200
[ Barking ]
236
00:10:52,220 --> 00:10:56,040
[ Both laugh ]
237
00:10:56,059 --> 00:10:59,009
Oh, we gots to get
one of those.
238
00:10:59,029 --> 00:11:03,149
Have you ever heard of...
shoplifting?
239
00:11:08,190 --> 00:11:11,030
[ Laughing ]
240
00:11:11,049 --> 00:11:13,019
[ Cellphone ringing,
buzzing ]
241
00:11:13,039 --> 00:11:14,149
[ Gasps ]
242
00:11:14,169 --> 00:11:17,059
Hey, chica!
You must be my roomie!
243
00:11:17,080 --> 00:11:18,100
I'm Becca.
What's your deal?
244
00:11:18,120 --> 00:11:19,160
Where you from?
245
00:11:19,179 --> 00:11:21,099
Hey, I'm Emil--
[ Cellphone rings ]
246
00:11:21,120 --> 00:11:24,020
Ugh, sorry, my ex Tucker
won't stop calling.
247
00:11:24,039 --> 00:11:25,159
He broke up with me
because he wanted to --
248
00:11:25,179 --> 00:11:27,229
Screw my professor.
I mean, how dare she give me a C
249
00:11:28,009 --> 00:11:29,179
just 'cause I fell asleep
during the final?
250
00:11:29,200 --> 00:11:31,140
I should just change
my major to --
251
00:11:31,159 --> 00:11:33,179
...doing cocaine
in the bathroom,
252
00:11:33,200 --> 00:11:35,030
and I'm like,
"Really, mason?
253
00:11:35,049 --> 00:11:36,999
You're railing lines
on Christmas Eve?"
254
00:11:37,019 --> 00:11:38,009
And he's like --
255
00:11:38,029 --> 00:11:39,149
"Uh, those nudes
aren't mine,"
256
00:11:39,169 --> 00:11:42,059
and he accused me
of snooping?
257
00:11:42,080 --> 00:11:43,140
I mean, yes I --
258
00:11:43,159 --> 00:11:45,009
stole his identity,
259
00:11:45,029 --> 00:11:48,159
but Travor gave me chlamydia
first, so, guess what, I --
260
00:11:48,179 --> 00:11:50,189
...know that he had sex
with my sister
261
00:11:50,210 --> 00:11:52,140
and expects me
to forgive him?
262
00:11:52,159 --> 00:11:54,069
I mean you're so lucky
you've never had to go
263
00:11:54,090 --> 00:11:55,200
through pain like this.
264
00:11:55,220 --> 00:11:57,230
Anyways, what's up
with you, gal?
265
00:11:58,009 --> 00:11:59,139
[ Breathing heavily ]
266
00:11:59,159 --> 00:12:01,029
[ Screams ]
267
00:12:01,049 --> 00:12:02,229
[ Cellphone ringing,
buzzing ]
268
00:12:03,009 --> 00:12:04,209
[ Sighs ]
269
00:12:04,230 --> 00:12:07,150
Heyyyyyy,
chica.
270
00:12:07,169 --> 00:12:14,059
♪♪
271
00:12:14,080 --> 00:12:20,160
♪♪
272
00:12:20,179 --> 00:12:22,999
Becca sucks.
You hate seeing her.
273
00:12:23,019 --> 00:12:24,119
Why don't you just cancel?
I can't.
274
00:12:24,139 --> 00:12:25,139
She's my oldest friend.
275
00:12:25,159 --> 00:12:27,029
You're too nice.
276
00:12:27,049 --> 00:12:29,999
Firm boundaries are the only way
to make people respect you.
277
00:12:30,019 --> 00:12:32,079
Hey Bridg--
No.
278
00:12:32,100 --> 00:12:34,060
See?
You're right.
279
00:12:34,080 --> 00:12:35,160
I'm going to cancel.
280
00:12:35,179 --> 00:12:37,049
[ Cellphone keyboard
clacking ]
281
00:12:37,070 --> 00:12:40,140
[ Text messages
chiming rapidly ]
282
00:12:43,019 --> 00:12:45,009
We're meeting at 7:00.
On her side of town.
283
00:12:45,029 --> 00:12:47,099
She's short on cash,
so I'm buying.
284
00:12:47,120 --> 00:12:49,190
[ Sighs ]
285
00:12:49,210 --> 00:12:51,010
Heeeey, bestie!
286
00:12:51,029 --> 00:12:52,189
Ohmigod, I'm sorry
I'm late,
287
00:12:52,210 --> 00:12:54,170
I forgot you wanted
to meet tonight.
288
00:12:54,190 --> 00:12:56,110
But you called me.
289
00:12:56,129 --> 00:12:58,079
Ugh, the new guy
I'm dating?
290
00:12:58,100 --> 00:13:01,120
Okay he's, like, crazy hot
but such a dick.
291
00:13:01,139 --> 00:13:03,139
He, like, expects me
to worship him,
292
00:13:03,159 --> 00:13:05,099
and I'm like, I --
Fair's fair. No!
293
00:13:05,120 --> 00:13:06,160
You know what?
All men are trash.
294
00:13:06,179 --> 00:13:08,009
So, I said to Luc,
295
00:13:08,029 --> 00:13:10,189
it's, like, when will someone
pay attention to me?
296
00:13:10,210 --> 00:13:13,050
Like, when is it
my turn?
297
00:13:13,070 --> 00:13:14,140
Okay, look,
298
00:13:14,159 --> 00:13:18,079
sometimes relationships
become toxic and one-sided,
299
00:13:18,100 --> 00:13:20,120
and then you need
to set boundaries.
300
00:13:20,139 --> 00:13:21,179
Stand up for yourself.
301
00:13:21,200 --> 00:13:23,200
Say, "Enough is enough,
Becca."
302
00:13:23,220 --> 00:13:26,210
Or Rick.
Or...what's his name?
303
00:13:26,230 --> 00:13:28,220
Wow.
It's Luc.
304
00:13:29,000 --> 00:13:30,180
You should
listen better.
305
00:13:30,200 --> 00:13:33,110
But...
that's actually great advice.
306
00:13:33,129 --> 00:13:34,169
Thank you.
Oh.
307
00:13:34,190 --> 00:13:36,090
Um...
You're welcome.
308
00:13:36,110 --> 00:13:38,030
Okay, so,
enough about me.
309
00:13:38,049 --> 00:13:39,149
What's up
with you, girl?
310
00:13:39,169 --> 00:13:41,039
Dating anybody?
311
00:13:41,059 --> 00:13:43,009
I'm...
married.
312
00:13:43,029 --> 00:13:44,049
You came to my wedding.
313
00:13:44,070 --> 00:13:45,170
I don't think
that's true.
314
00:13:45,190 --> 00:13:46,220
Ugh.
315
00:13:49,159 --> 00:13:51,079
Ugh.
So?
316
00:13:51,100 --> 00:13:53,190
How'd it go
with your BFF?
317
00:13:53,210 --> 00:13:54,200
Pretty well, actually.
318
00:13:54,220 --> 00:13:56,040
She let me
talk a little.
319
00:13:56,059 --> 00:13:57,189
I got some face time
out of the way,
320
00:13:57,210 --> 00:14:00,180
and now I won't have to see her
for another couple years.
321
00:14:00,200 --> 00:14:02,020
[ Doorbell rings ]
322
00:14:04,029 --> 00:14:05,219
Becca?
What are you doing here?
323
00:14:06,000 --> 00:14:07,020
I did it.
324
00:14:07,039 --> 00:14:09,019
I set boundaries
and I broke up with Luc.
325
00:14:09,039 --> 00:14:10,179
[ Sobbing ]
326
00:14:10,200 --> 00:14:14,190
Why is my life so hard
all the time?
327
00:14:14,210 --> 00:14:16,110
Could I crash
with you?
328
00:14:16,129 --> 00:14:17,139
Just for the night?
329
00:14:17,159 --> 00:14:18,209
Umm...
330
00:14:18,230 --> 00:14:21,180
I wouldn't ask, except you're
my best friend
331
00:14:21,200 --> 00:14:23,120
and you're responsible
for me
332
00:14:23,139 --> 00:14:25,129
not having anywhere
to sleep tonight.
333
00:14:25,149 --> 00:14:28,099
But I can be homeless,
if that's what you want...
334
00:14:28,120 --> 00:14:30,170
No, no,
o-of course you can stay.
335
00:14:30,190 --> 00:14:33,120
Thank you so much.
336
00:14:37,009 --> 00:14:40,039
Emily, can you grab
my stuff?
337
00:14:45,100 --> 00:14:48,030
Becca, you have been in there
for three hours!
338
00:14:48,049 --> 00:14:49,149
I need to shower!
339
00:14:49,169 --> 00:14:52,149
Thank you so much.
I would love an iced coffee.
340
00:14:52,169 --> 00:14:55,069
Becca, you've been binging
old seasons
341
00:14:55,090 --> 00:14:57,070
of "Survivor"
for three days.
342
00:14:57,090 --> 00:14:58,140
Could I watch
something?
343
00:14:58,159 --> 00:15:01,149
Ooh, an iced coffee
sounds yum. Theeenks.
344
00:15:01,169 --> 00:15:03,129
H-Hang on.
Where did all my stuff go?
345
00:15:03,149 --> 00:15:07,029
An iced coffee with minimal ice
would be perf. Theeenk you.
346
00:15:07,049 --> 00:15:08,129
Okay,
she's got to go.
347
00:15:08,149 --> 00:15:10,079
She used all my lotions
and serums,
348
00:15:10,100 --> 00:15:12,010
and now my skin
is barely glowing.
349
00:15:12,029 --> 00:15:13,019
I like her.
350
00:15:13,039 --> 00:15:14,149
She plays
pretend with me.
351
00:15:14,169 --> 00:15:16,019
Becca:
Tiny Butler!
[ Bell rings ]
352
00:15:16,039 --> 00:15:17,119
Right away, ma'am!
353
00:15:17,139 --> 00:15:19,109
I know she's your friend,
but she's taking advantage
354
00:15:19,129 --> 00:15:20,159
of your kindness.
355
00:15:20,179 --> 00:15:23,159
Okay, fine,
I'll tell her to leave.
356
00:15:23,179 --> 00:15:24,199
[ Sighs ]
357
00:15:24,220 --> 00:15:27,180
Hey, gal, can we talk
about something?
358
00:15:27,200 --> 00:15:30,060
That'll be all,
Tiny Butler.
359
00:15:30,080 --> 00:15:32,000
We have fun.
360
00:15:32,019 --> 00:15:33,179
Listen, Becca --
361
00:15:33,200 --> 00:15:35,060
Shut up for a second!
362
00:15:35,080 --> 00:15:37,120
I'm pregnant!
363
00:15:37,139 --> 00:15:40,079
What?
I had breakup sex
with Luc,
364
00:15:40,100 --> 00:15:42,040
and now I'm gonna
have his baby,
365
00:15:42,059 --> 00:15:44,059
and I don't want to
tell him!
366
00:15:44,080 --> 00:15:45,210
I have no money,
367
00:15:45,230 --> 00:15:50,170
but I'm just so thankful
that I have you.
368
00:15:50,190 --> 00:15:54,140
Anyways, what did you want
to talk to me about?
369
00:15:56,120 --> 00:15:58,080
Becca: Ouch!
[ Gasps ]
370
00:15:58,100 --> 00:15:59,160
Becca?
371
00:15:59,179 --> 00:16:02,049
You kicked me out,
so now I live in the trash.
372
00:16:02,070 --> 00:16:04,090
I needed to set
boundaries!
373
00:16:04,110 --> 00:16:07,100
Oh, who would do this
to their best friend?
374
00:16:07,120 --> 00:16:09,220
You're a monster,
Mommy!
375
00:16:10,000 --> 00:16:11,090
Monster!
376
00:16:11,110 --> 00:16:12,120
[ Gasps ]
377
00:16:12,139 --> 00:16:13,189
[ Police sirens wail,
guns cock ]
378
00:16:13,210 --> 00:16:15,130
Looks like we got
a monster here.
379
00:16:15,149 --> 00:16:17,999
Better call in
animal control.
380
00:16:18,019 --> 00:16:18,229
[ Gasps ]
381
00:16:19,009 --> 00:16:21,169
All: Monster!
Monster!
382
00:16:21,190 --> 00:16:23,210
Nothing! I had absolutely
nothing to tell you.
383
00:16:23,230 --> 00:16:27,130
Good, 'cause I really need
today to be about me, y'know?
384
00:16:27,149 --> 00:16:28,999
It's just
a minor delay.
385
00:16:29,019 --> 00:16:30,209
I'll help her find an apartment,
and she'll be out
386
00:16:30,230 --> 00:16:32,010
before she's
too far along.
387
00:16:32,029 --> 00:16:34,099
[ Yawns ]
Good morning.
388
00:16:34,120 --> 00:16:36,000
Whoa.
Becca.
389
00:16:36,019 --> 00:16:38,059
You got...
very pregnant.
390
00:16:38,080 --> 00:16:40,020
Overnight.
I know.
391
00:16:40,039 --> 00:16:41,209
He's growing so fast.
392
00:16:42,000 --> 00:16:43,120
Ooh, he's kicking!
Here, feel!
393
00:16:43,139 --> 00:16:44,129
[ Growls ]
394
00:16:44,149 --> 00:16:46,049
Whoa!
What the f--
395
00:16:46,070 --> 00:16:50,060
I have some follow-up questions
about the birds and the bees.
396
00:16:50,080 --> 00:16:51,200
Me, too.
Let's get out of here.
397
00:16:51,220 --> 00:16:55,060
Ooh, Jersh, while you're out,
I'm having some major cravings.
398
00:16:55,080 --> 00:16:57,140
Can you pick me up
some locusts and goat ears
399
00:16:57,159 --> 00:16:59,199
and, like, mm, some of
the blood of the innocent?
400
00:16:59,220 --> 00:17:00,220
Sure thing.
401
00:17:01,000 --> 00:17:02,020
Theeenks.
402
00:17:02,039 --> 00:17:04,099
Oh, and an iced coffee!
Thenks.
403
00:17:04,119 --> 00:17:06,069
This is nuts!
I know.
404
00:17:06,089 --> 00:17:08,049
I think I can get most of that
stuff at the pet store,
405
00:17:08,069 --> 00:17:11,149
but the blood of the innocent
might be more of Costco thing.
406
00:17:11,170 --> 00:17:13,230
[ Doorbell rings ]
Becca:
[ Gasps ] That's for me!
407
00:17:15,200 --> 00:17:17,200
Guys,
this is Hecate.
408
00:17:17,220 --> 00:17:21,150
Hecate, this is Emily
and Jersh and...
409
00:17:21,170 --> 00:17:22,170
the rest.
410
00:17:22,190 --> 00:17:24,230
Hecate's a friend
of Luc's.
411
00:17:25,009 --> 00:17:28,079
She offered to be my doula
for the home birth.
412
00:17:28,099 --> 00:17:30,039
D-Did you say
home birth?
413
00:17:30,059 --> 00:17:35,039
All my work has been
building to this moment.
414
00:17:35,059 --> 00:17:41,209
Cum venerit, et regnabis
stridebo terroremque timuerunt.
415
00:17:41,230 --> 00:17:44,080
[ Chuckles ] What's your
friend's deal? She single?
416
00:17:44,099 --> 00:17:45,169
Oh, God.
417
00:17:49,069 --> 00:17:51,229
Oh.
Effing morning sickness.
418
00:17:52,009 --> 00:17:53,229
At least I made it
to the trash can.
419
00:17:54,009 --> 00:17:55,059
Like a lady.
420
00:17:55,079 --> 00:17:57,159
That's my purse.
421
00:17:57,180 --> 00:18:01,120
Hecate:
[ Speaking Latin ]
422
00:18:03,029 --> 00:18:05,029
Em, you need to
kick her out.
423
00:18:05,049 --> 00:18:06,159
[ Grunts ]
You're right.
424
00:18:06,180 --> 00:18:09,120
That bitch has
got to go.
425
00:18:09,140 --> 00:18:12,180
[ Gasps ]
Her cellphone.
426
00:18:12,200 --> 00:18:14,000
What are you doing?
427
00:18:14,019 --> 00:18:15,129
"Hey, Luc.
428
00:18:15,150 --> 00:18:20,000
I miss you, I was wrong, you're
so hot, let's get back together.
429
00:18:20,019 --> 00:18:21,999
XO Becca."
430
00:18:22,019 --> 00:18:24,019
If they're together,
she'll move back to his place!
431
00:18:24,039 --> 00:18:25,039
[ Text message chimes ]
432
00:18:25,059 --> 00:18:27,009
He says
he'll be right over!
433
00:18:28,029 --> 00:18:30,149
[ Thunder crashes ]
434
00:18:30,170 --> 00:18:31,170
Oh, my God.
435
00:18:31,190 --> 00:18:33,230
That's probably unrelated,
right?
436
00:18:34,009 --> 00:18:35,119
[ Screaming ]
437
00:18:38,059 --> 00:18:40,069
He approaches.
438
00:18:45,140 --> 00:18:47,090
Oh, yeahhhh!
439
00:18:47,109 --> 00:18:48,129
Luc in the house.
440
00:18:48,150 --> 00:18:50,130
Yo, Becca, get up,
I'm hungry.
441
00:18:50,150 --> 00:18:52,110
What the eff
are you doing here?
442
00:18:52,130 --> 00:18:55,090
Whoa, unh-uh,
you summoned me.
443
00:18:55,109 --> 00:18:56,999
You think I want
to be here?
444
00:18:57,019 --> 00:19:00,149
I'm supposed to be DJ-ing the
Samsung pop-up at the galleria.
445
00:19:00,170 --> 00:19:03,070
Unh, get it,
get it, yeah.
446
00:19:04,130 --> 00:19:05,170
Wait, wait,
wait, wait.
447
00:19:05,190 --> 00:19:06,220
"Luc"
as in "Lucifer"?
448
00:19:07,000 --> 00:19:08,130
Her boyfriend
is the devil?
449
00:19:08,150 --> 00:19:09,170
Yeah, he sucks.
450
00:19:09,190 --> 00:19:12,170
No, like, he's literally
the devil.
451
00:19:12,190 --> 00:19:14,080
Yeah, this guy's
the worst.
452
00:19:14,099 --> 00:19:16,059
I don't want to
talk to you!
453
00:19:16,079 --> 00:19:18,039
Bex, why you being
such a binch?
454
00:19:18,059 --> 00:19:20,129
Oh, snap,
you on the rag?
455
00:19:20,150 --> 00:19:22,000
Nasty!
456
00:19:22,019 --> 00:19:23,229
No, idiot,
I'm pregnant.
457
00:19:24,009 --> 00:19:25,149
Whoa. Dope.
That's hilarious.
458
00:19:25,170 --> 00:19:27,050
I love you
so freakin' much.
459
00:19:28,200 --> 00:19:30,200
I love you
so freakin' much.
460
00:19:30,220 --> 00:19:32,150
Yeah.
Get it, get it.
461
00:19:32,170 --> 00:19:33,190
It's working.
462
00:19:33,210 --> 00:19:35,080
She's gonna move back
in with him!
463
00:19:35,099 --> 00:19:38,029
Everyone, I have
an announcement.
464
00:19:38,049 --> 00:19:40,139
Luc and I are getting
back together.
465
00:19:40,160 --> 00:19:42,050
[ Giggles ]
Yes!
466
00:19:42,069 --> 00:19:43,099
And he's gonna
crash here, too.
467
00:19:43,119 --> 00:19:45,089
What? No!
He can't.
468
00:19:45,109 --> 00:19:47,039
Who's this chick?
She on the rag, too?
469
00:19:47,059 --> 00:19:48,159
Oh, cycle sisters.
Hot.
470
00:19:48,180 --> 00:19:51,040
OMG, Emily,
don't be so uptight.
471
00:19:51,059 --> 00:19:52,169
He can sleep
in my room.
472
00:19:52,190 --> 00:19:54,030
You don't have a room!
473
00:19:54,049 --> 00:19:56,209
Shut up,
my water's breaking!
474
00:19:56,230 --> 00:19:58,110
[ Gasping ]
Come on!
475
00:20:00,069 --> 00:20:01,209
[ Cackling ]
476
00:20:03,230 --> 00:20:05,180
[ Gasps ]
477
00:20:05,200 --> 00:20:09,170
Omnis mundus
erit eius!
478
00:20:09,190 --> 00:20:11,110
Here's some ice chips,
sweetie.
479
00:20:11,130 --> 00:20:13,030
A few more pushes...
480
00:20:13,049 --> 00:20:15,119
Ohmigod,
I can't do it!
481
00:20:15,140 --> 00:20:16,200
Where's Luc?
482
00:20:18,210 --> 00:20:22,150
So, I spin at the Burbank Tender
Greens every other Tuesday.
483
00:20:22,170 --> 00:20:24,030
You should
check it out.
484
00:20:24,049 --> 00:20:26,119
Isn't your girlfriend having
your baby in the other room?
485
00:20:26,140 --> 00:20:28,090
Heh.
We don't do labels.
486
00:20:28,109 --> 00:20:29,169
I've got those towels,
Becca.
487
00:20:29,190 --> 00:20:31,200
No, I want
the good towels!
488
00:20:31,220 --> 00:20:33,090
God,
you're selfish.
489
00:20:33,109 --> 00:20:35,119
Oh, I'm selfish?
490
00:20:35,140 --> 00:20:37,040
Sophomore year, you made me
cut my hair
491
00:20:37,059 --> 00:20:39,139
because "our lengths
were too matchy."
492
00:20:39,160 --> 00:20:41,140
I'm the long-haired friend
and you know it!
493
00:20:41,160 --> 00:20:43,030
[ Thunder crashes ]
494
00:20:43,049 --> 00:20:46,069
You borrowed all my clothes
and never gave them back!
495
00:20:46,089 --> 00:20:49,169
It's not my fault
everything looks hotter on me!
496
00:20:49,190 --> 00:20:51,110
You don't care about me.
497
00:20:51,130 --> 00:20:53,050
You take no interest
in my career,
498
00:20:53,069 --> 00:20:54,199
my marriage,
my daughter.
499
00:20:54,220 --> 00:20:56,140
What daughter?
500
00:20:56,160 --> 00:20:58,020
Gahhh!
501
00:20:58,039 --> 00:20:59,059
That's it!
502
00:20:59,079 --> 00:21:01,049
I want you out of my house,
Becca.
503
00:21:01,069 --> 00:21:03,199
And I want you
out of my life!
504
00:21:03,220 --> 00:21:05,180
You're such a freakin'...
505
00:21:05,200 --> 00:21:08,180
beeehhhhhtch!
506
00:21:08,200 --> 00:21:10,100
[ Baby crying ]
507
00:21:12,190 --> 00:21:14,000
All: Awwwww.
508
00:21:14,019 --> 00:21:15,069
[ Roars ]
509
00:21:15,089 --> 00:21:16,149
Oh, my God.
Ew! No!
510
00:21:16,170 --> 00:21:18,170
Hell yeah.
That's my baby.
511
00:21:19,220 --> 00:21:23,080
[ Clears throat ]
Well, I guess this is it.
512
00:21:23,099 --> 00:21:26,109
Yeah, Luc and I are off
to the bowels of Hell.
513
00:21:26,130 --> 00:21:28,170
But, before I go,
I need to say something.
514
00:21:28,190 --> 00:21:30,190
I think we should hit pause
on our friendship.
515
00:21:30,210 --> 00:21:32,110
Yeah, I already told you
that I --
516
00:21:32,130 --> 00:21:34,100
No offense,
but you're kind of toxic,
517
00:21:34,119 --> 00:21:36,219
and I can't have
negative energy around my baby.
518
00:21:37,000 --> 00:21:38,120
[ Growls ]
519
00:21:38,140 --> 00:21:40,150
I'm a mama now.
You wouldn't understand.
520
00:21:40,170 --> 00:21:44,000
For the last time,
I have a child.
521
00:21:44,019 --> 00:21:45,019
She's right here.
522
00:21:45,039 --> 00:21:46,009
Ma'am.
523
00:21:46,029 --> 00:21:47,149
Emily, that's
Tiny Butler.
524
00:21:47,170 --> 00:21:48,150
Don't be weird.
525
00:21:48,170 --> 00:21:52,000
[ Dubstep music playing ]
526
00:21:52,019 --> 00:21:55,159
Uh, honk, honk!
Babe! Car! Let's go!
527
00:21:55,180 --> 00:21:57,010
I can't wait!
528
00:21:57,029 --> 00:21:58,139
Get in the car!
Get in the car!
529
00:21:58,160 --> 00:22:00,040
That's my guy.
530
00:22:00,059 --> 00:22:01,099
You'll find one
someday.
531
00:22:01,119 --> 00:22:02,119
[ Inhales sharply ]
532
00:22:02,140 --> 00:22:03,140
Go to hell, Becca.
533
00:22:03,160 --> 00:22:05,030
I am.
534
00:22:05,049 --> 00:22:06,169
You never li--
535
00:22:06,190 --> 00:22:16,140
♪♪
536
00:22:16,160 --> 00:22:26,090
♪♪
537
00:22:26,109 --> 00:22:36,019
♪♪
538
00:22:36,039 --> 00:22:45,219
♪♪
539
00:22:46,000 --> 00:22:55,210
♪♪
37271
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