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1
00:00:01,080 --> 00:00:06,040
? Cos he gets up in the morning
And he goes to work at nine
2
00:00:06,120 --> 00:00:11,320
? And he comes back home at 5:30
Gets the same train every time
3
00:00:11,400 --> 00:00:16,880
? And he's oh, so healthy
In his body and his mind
4
00:00:16,960 --> 00:00:20,480
? He's a well respected man
about town
5
00:00:20,560 --> 00:00:25,760
? Doing the best things so
conservatively. ?
6
00:00:25,840 --> 00:00:27,800
You think he's better than Connery?
7
00:00:27,880 --> 00:00:29,400
No. I didn't say he was better.
8
00:00:29,480 --> 00:00:31,640
I said I liked him more. Why?
9
00:00:31,720 --> 00:00:34,000
Connery walked away from a steady,
well-paying job
10
00:00:34,080 --> 00:00:36,040
and I think that makes him an idiot.
11
00:00:36,120 --> 00:00:37,640
I don't want an idiot playing Bond.
12
00:00:37,720 --> 00:00:40,480
If Lazenby's got any sense,
he'll stick around for the next
13
00:00:40,560 --> 00:00:43,120
20 years and we'll forget
all about this Connery fella.
14
00:00:43,200 --> 00:00:44,640
Do you think you'd make a good spy?
15
00:00:44,720 --> 00:00:46,881
How do you
know I'm not a spy?
16
00:00:50,120 --> 00:00:53,600
I've blown my cover now,
I'm gonna have to kill you.
17
00:00:53,680 --> 00:00:56,360
Switzerland looked amazing.
Have you ever been?
18
00:00:56,440 --> 00:00:57,440
No, no.
19
00:00:57,480 --> 00:01:00,640
But, you know, I like their cheese
and their army knives are very good.
20
00:01:02,800 --> 00:01:05,240
Where's your favourite place
you've ever been?
21
00:01:05,320 --> 00:01:08,160
Oh, so many, so many.
22
00:01:08,240 --> 00:01:10,440
Um, Southend's very nice.
23
00:01:12,120 --> 00:01:13,200
What?
24
00:01:13,280 --> 00:01:14,680
That's a joke, right?
25
00:01:14,760 --> 00:01:18,080
No. It's home to the world's
longest pleasure pier.
26
00:01:18,160 --> 00:01:20,600
Have you never been abroad?
27
00:01:20,680 --> 00:01:21,880
It's not that easy. You know,
28
00:01:21,960 --> 00:01:24,160
it costs money and you've got to
book time off work.
29
00:01:24,240 --> 00:01:26,760
If you're not careful, you're gonna
wake up a bitter old man
30
00:01:26,840 --> 00:01:28,800
regretting all your missed
opportunities.
31
00:01:28,880 --> 00:01:32,120
I can't worry about that now, that's
at least a good three weeks away.
32
00:01:32,200 --> 00:01:33,240
I'd say two. What?
33
00:01:33,320 --> 00:01:34,920
Maybe one.
34
00:01:36,200 --> 00:01:37,920
Oh, what fresh hell is this?
35
00:01:43,800 --> 00:01:45,600
No, don't engage. Don't en...
36
00:01:46,760 --> 00:01:47,760
Looks like fun.
37
00:01:47,840 --> 00:01:49,080
Sorry for the inconvenience.
38
00:01:49,160 --> 00:01:50,200
What's going on?
39
00:01:50,280 --> 00:01:52,480
Wednesdays is our dance
programme on the wireless.
40
00:01:52,560 --> 00:01:54,400
Our living room's crowded
with furniture
41
00:01:54,480 --> 00:01:56,160
so we come out here to dance.
42
00:01:56,240 --> 00:01:57,640
No-one seems to mind.
43
00:01:57,720 --> 00:01:59,440
Would you and your husband care to
join us?
44
00:02:00,920 --> 00:02:04,000
What do you say, dear?
Care to trip the light fantastic?
45
00:02:04,080 --> 00:02:06,520
No. I tend to trip over
the light fantastic.
46
00:02:06,600 --> 00:02:08,200
Maybe some other time.
47
00:02:08,280 --> 00:02:09,640
Goodbye, then. Bye-bye.
48
00:02:13,320 --> 00:02:15,160
How mental is that?
49
00:02:15,240 --> 00:02:18,120
Why not just bring your TV and the
sofa in the middle of the street?
50
00:02:18,200 --> 00:02:20,040
How about the toilet?
Excuse me dear,
51
00:02:20,120 --> 00:02:23,280
just popping into the middle
of the road to evacuate my bowels.
52
00:02:23,360 --> 00:02:24,360
Back in a minute.
53
00:02:24,400 --> 00:02:25,680
Hey, pull over here.
54
00:02:25,760 --> 00:02:27,080
What? Really? Oh. Yeah.
55
00:02:33,040 --> 00:02:35,680
You all right? Yeah.
56
00:02:39,360 --> 00:02:42,320
It just reminds me of Craig,
my ex-boyfriend.
57
00:02:43,560 --> 00:02:45,040
Oh, right.
58
00:02:45,120 --> 00:02:47,280
When we first lived
together in San Francisco
59
00:02:47,360 --> 00:02:51,160
we used to play records
and dance around our apartment.
60
00:02:51,240 --> 00:02:53,720
One day he got this idea that we
should go to London
61
00:02:53,800 --> 00:02:56,480
cos that's where it was
all happening.
62
00:02:56,560 --> 00:03:00,280
He'd become this rock star
and I'd be his muse.
63
00:03:00,360 --> 00:03:02,760
So we blew all our money on air fare
64
00:03:02,840 --> 00:03:07,120
and wound up in a flat in Soho with
a bunch of other musicians.
65
00:03:07,200 --> 00:03:12,960
It was kind of romantic at first,
but there was no money
66
00:03:13,040 --> 00:03:17,360
and no work and he was just so pissed
all the time.
67
00:03:17,440 --> 00:03:20,280
American pissed or British pissed?
68
00:03:20,360 --> 00:03:22,560
What's British pissed?
69
00:03:22,640 --> 00:03:25,840
Oh. Well, then both, I guess.
70
00:03:25,920 --> 00:03:28,400
You don't mind me
telling you all this, do you?
71
00:03:28,480 --> 00:03:32,800
No. No. Anyway, he just lost
any ambition.
72
00:03:34,680 --> 00:03:38,720
When he started fooling around on me
I thought it would be uncool
73
00:03:38,800 --> 00:03:39,800
to act like I cared.
74
00:03:41,000 --> 00:03:44,920
Until his friends started hitting on
me and then it was time to get out.
75
00:03:46,640 --> 00:03:51,040
So, my friend Audrey said I could
house sit for her in Watford.
76
00:03:53,920 --> 00:03:55,040
So here I am.
77
00:03:56,720 --> 00:03:58,320
Seems like a lifetime ago...
78
00:04:01,440 --> 00:04:03,200
...dancing around our apartment.
79
00:04:06,960 --> 00:04:11,040
But look at them.
They're still at it, still happy.
80
00:04:19,240 --> 00:04:21,760
Things just get shitty,
don't they, Jeremy?
81
00:04:24,120 --> 00:04:26,000
Yeah, they do.
82
00:04:26,080 --> 00:04:27,080
Let's go.
83
00:04:33,400 --> 00:04:36,040
You know, Robin...
Don't ever fall in love, Jeremy.
84
00:04:40,480 --> 00:04:41,800
Duly noted.
85
00:04:48,520 --> 00:04:50,560
? Happy birthday to you
86
00:04:50,640 --> 00:04:55,520
? Happy birthday dear Jeremy
87
00:04:55,600 --> 00:04:59,360
? Happy birthday to you. ?
88
00:05:01,560 --> 00:05:04,280
Cheers, everyone. Cheers!
89
00:05:04,360 --> 00:05:08,000
There's just one more thing.
I have a gift for you, Mr Sloane.
90
00:05:08,080 --> 00:05:09,400
Ooh!
91
00:05:09,480 --> 00:05:11,600
What is this, a bloody Aston Martin?
92
00:05:17,160 --> 00:05:19,640
Wow, a cruise.
93
00:05:19,720 --> 00:05:20,840
Ooh!
94
00:05:20,920 --> 00:05:23,240
It's round the Med.
It's going to be beautiful.
95
00:05:25,200 --> 00:05:29,840
Wow. Right, well, I'm amazed
we could afford this, my darling.
96
00:05:29,920 --> 00:05:32,000
Well, I did have to
dip into the savings a bit.
97
00:05:32,080 --> 00:05:33,680
I bet, yeah.
98
00:05:33,760 --> 00:05:35,560
Right. Right, no, that's fine.
99
00:05:35,640 --> 00:05:38,520
I'm not sure it
fits in with our savings plan,
100
00:05:38,600 --> 00:05:39,800
you naughty little monkey.
101
00:05:39,880 --> 00:05:42,760
But I understand you probably didn't
wanna discuss it with me,
102
00:05:42,840 --> 00:05:46,520
because you wanted to keep it
a surprise - which it certainly is.
103
00:05:46,600 --> 00:05:48,960
Well, I didn't discuss it with you,
because I knew if I did,
104
00:05:49,040 --> 00:05:50,400
we wouldn't be going. Of course.
105
00:05:50,480 --> 00:05:53,000
Because when we talked about going
abroad earlier in the year
106
00:05:53,080 --> 00:05:54,880
we decided we couldn't afford it.
107
00:05:54,960 --> 00:05:56,680
So a sensible assumption there.
108
00:05:58,400 --> 00:05:59,640
Cheers, everyone.
109
00:05:59,720 --> 00:06:02,080
Cheers.
110
00:06:02,160 --> 00:06:06,040
Mum did a cruise. Yeah.
Said she had a lovely time.
111
00:06:06,120 --> 00:06:07,960
Until the third day,
when she got the shits.
112
00:06:08,040 --> 00:06:12,680
After that it was hell,
stuck in that hot little cabin.
113
00:06:12,760 --> 00:06:15,480
What a love image there, Beans.
114
00:06:15,560 --> 00:06:17,320
I just hope Saunders doesn't sack me
115
00:06:17,400 --> 00:06:19,440
when I tell him
I have to take a fortnight off work.
116
00:06:23,720 --> 00:06:26,160
Look, I'm sorry it doesn't
fit in with your plans, darling,
117
00:06:26,240 --> 00:06:28,521
but the next time I try
and do something nice I'll be sure
118
00:06:28,600 --> 00:06:30,640
to ask for written
permission in triplicate.
119
00:06:36,120 --> 00:06:37,840
Happy birthday, darling!
120
00:06:47,800 --> 00:06:48,920
Who else wants cake?
121
00:06:49,000 --> 00:06:53,400
? C is for the candy trimmed around
the Christmas tree. ?
122
00:06:53,480 --> 00:06:54,640
Do you think she'll like it?
123
00:06:54,720 --> 00:06:56,920
I don't know.
Is your mum a big panda fan?
124
00:06:57,000 --> 00:06:58,120
Who doesn't like pandas?
125
00:06:58,200 --> 00:07:00,720
What are you getting your missus
for Christmas, Rossy?
126
00:07:00,800 --> 00:07:02,720
Oh, I'm not allowed to buy her
presents
127
00:07:02,800 --> 00:07:05,400
ever since I bought her that
lawn mower for her birthday.
128
00:07:05,480 --> 00:07:07,400
Oh man, I'd love a lawn mower.
129
00:07:07,480 --> 00:07:09,000
Beans, you don't have a lawn.
130
00:07:09,080 --> 00:07:11,080
Even so.
What about you, Sloaney?
131
00:07:11,160 --> 00:07:13,920
Are you getting something special
for your American girlfriend?
132
00:07:14,000 --> 00:07:15,400
Shut up. She's not my girlfriend.
133
00:07:15,480 --> 00:07:18,040
Then what's that little smile
creeping across your face then?
134
00:07:18,120 --> 00:07:21,160
My littlest does the same thing.
It's usually wind.
135
00:07:21,240 --> 00:07:22,240
I don't know.
136
00:07:22,280 --> 00:07:25,600
I can't for the life of me think why
she'd be remotely interested.
137
00:07:25,680 --> 00:07:28,240
It's probably your confidence
she's attracted to.
138
00:07:28,320 --> 00:07:31,360
All right, smartarse.
We're going out again on Friday.
139
00:07:31,440 --> 00:07:34,120
Again? Sloaney, well done, my son.
140
00:07:34,200 --> 00:07:36,760
Yeah, that's my boy. Now,
you got all the necessary equipment?
141
00:07:36,840 --> 00:07:40,280
Equipment?
We're just gonna hear music, Reg.
142
00:07:40,360 --> 00:07:42,760
We're not scaling a bloody mountain.
143
00:07:42,840 --> 00:07:45,640
Ah, there's all sorts of new toys
out there, my friend.
144
00:07:45,720 --> 00:07:48,200
New positions, helpful accessories.
145
00:07:48,280 --> 00:07:49,880
I don't think she's like that.
146
00:07:49,960 --> 00:07:53,600
She's a Yank, right?
And a bit of a hippie?
147
00:07:53,680 --> 00:07:56,400
So? Now that's a woman of the world.
148
00:07:56,480 --> 00:07:58,880
You'd best be prepared, son.
149
00:07:58,960 --> 00:08:01,480
Have you even been with anyone
since Janet?
150
00:08:01,560 --> 00:08:02,840
How do you mean exactly?
151
00:08:02,920 --> 00:08:04,120
Translation - no.
152
00:08:04,200 --> 00:08:06,720
Come on, mate. You're a man.
Best act like one.
153
00:08:06,800 --> 00:08:09,080
Says the lad cuddling the giant
stuffed panda.
154
00:08:09,160 --> 00:08:12,120
Ah, don't let them intimidate you
Sloaney. You'll be great.
155
00:08:12,200 --> 00:08:15,880
You'll be fine. A lot of birds fancy
the shy type, remember?
156
00:08:22,520 --> 00:08:27,480
? Underneath the lantern by the
barrack gate. ?
157
00:08:27,560 --> 00:08:31,560
Don't just stare at her Sloaney,
talk to her.
158
00:08:31,640 --> 00:08:35,240
Mind your own business, Reggie.
I wasn't staring at her.
159
00:08:35,320 --> 00:08:36,640
I'll bet you a shilling,
160
00:08:36,720 --> 00:08:39,440
he never even talks to
Nancy by the end of term.
161
00:08:39,520 --> 00:08:40,920
Forget about it, Rossy.
162
00:08:41,000 --> 00:08:43,680
We're on the same side of that bet.
Psst, Beans!
163
00:08:43,760 --> 00:08:44,760
Sloaney!
164
00:08:50,360 --> 00:08:52,560
That's just not right, is it?
165
00:08:52,640 --> 00:08:54,560
Look, they got your hair all wrong.
166
00:08:58,360 --> 00:09:03,600
Mr Sloane. Take your things and
proceed to the headmaster's office.
167
00:09:03,680 --> 00:09:04,680
But it wasn't me.
168
00:09:04,720 --> 00:09:05,840
Now!
169
00:09:19,360 --> 00:09:22,640
Ah. Into this sort of stuff, are you?
170
00:09:22,720 --> 00:09:24,480
No, it's for a friend.
171
00:09:24,560 --> 00:09:26,720
My wife wanted me
to try this stuff once.
172
00:09:26,800 --> 00:09:29,800
But it was too complicated.
All those positions.
173
00:09:29,880 --> 00:09:32,240
Yeah, sure. Thank you.
174
00:09:32,320 --> 00:09:34,720
Er, do you have a bag, please?
Oh, yeah, sure.
175
00:09:39,480 --> 00:09:40,480
Thank you.
176
00:09:43,760 --> 00:09:44,760
Yes.
177
00:09:54,040 --> 00:09:55,560
'Mr Sloane.'
178
00:10:01,280 --> 00:10:04,880
Oh, Mrs Wyndham, to what do
I owe this magnificent interruption?
179
00:10:04,960 --> 00:10:06,800
Good morning, Mr Sloane.
180
00:10:06,880 --> 00:10:10,280
I was wondering if I could trouble
you for some flour.
181
00:10:10,360 --> 00:10:12,760
I've run out and there's
something very important...
182
00:10:12,840 --> 00:10:15,280
Yes, yes. Please come in.
Let's find you some flour.
183
00:10:15,360 --> 00:10:17,120
Nothing would give me more pleasure,
184
00:10:17,200 --> 00:10:19,760
other than an exploding
boil on my nether regions.
185
00:10:19,840 --> 00:10:23,000
Oh, and some sugar too,
if you have some to spare.
186
00:10:23,080 --> 00:10:25,520
Yes, of course. What's next?
Eye of bloody newt?
187
00:10:25,600 --> 00:10:29,600
Oh. Wrapping Christmas presents,
are we?
188
00:10:30,840 --> 00:10:32,680
Yes, yes. That's exactly right.
189
00:10:32,760 --> 00:10:35,160
For Mrs Sloane?
Is she coming for Christmas?
190
00:10:35,240 --> 00:10:36,960
Afraid not. No, Mrs Wyndham.
191
00:10:37,040 --> 00:10:39,680
It's my annual Christmas gift I'm
sending to the halfway house
192
00:10:39,760 --> 00:10:41,960
in Brixton,
for girls who won't go all the way.
193
00:10:43,360 --> 00:10:45,480
Oh!
194
00:10:45,560 --> 00:10:47,720
Look at that, Nigel.
A double pleasure.
195
00:10:47,800 --> 00:10:51,360
Well, I'd love to settle in for a
nice long chat, Mrs Wyndham, but I'm
196
00:10:51,440 --> 00:10:54,760
sure you've got to get back to
baking biscuits for your imaginary friends.
197
00:10:54,840 --> 00:10:58,000
Thank you, Mr Sloane. Come, Nigel.
198
00:11:01,560 --> 00:11:03,440
Always a pleasure to see you out,
Mrs Wyndham.
199
00:11:18,520 --> 00:11:20,560
Kevin. Gerald. What the hell's
going on?
200
00:11:20,640 --> 00:11:23,480
It's OK, sir. We were just playing.
201
00:11:23,560 --> 00:11:25,640
Playing? What were you playing?
Lord Of The Flies?
202
00:11:25,720 --> 00:11:27,680
Luke, you do not have to
cover for these boys.
203
00:11:27,760 --> 00:11:29,440
Luke doesn't mind. Do you, Luke?
204
00:11:29,520 --> 00:11:31,720
Doesn't mind? Of course he minds!
205
00:11:31,800 --> 00:11:33,680
Look, piggy in the mud.
206
00:11:33,760 --> 00:11:35,640
Oink, oink. Oink.
207
00:11:35,720 --> 00:11:36,880
Oink, oink!
208
00:11:36,960 --> 00:11:38,520
That is enough! Do you think
it's funny
209
00:11:38,600 --> 00:11:40,320
to taunt someone for their
weight? Do you?
210
00:11:40,400 --> 00:11:43,240
We're just having a laugh, sir. Oh,
"We're just having a laugh, sir."
211
00:11:43,320 --> 00:11:45,121
We'll see how much of a laugh it is,
shall we?
212
00:11:45,160 --> 00:11:47,600
Why don't we all have a laugh, huh?
Ha-ha ha-ha!
213
00:11:47,680 --> 00:11:48,840
Let's have a laugh, yeah?
214
00:11:48,920 --> 00:11:52,360
See how you like it - in the mud!
Ha-ha ha-ha!
215
00:11:52,440 --> 00:11:55,360
Stop it! What are you doing?
Stop it! Stop it, you fat idiot!
216
00:11:55,440 --> 00:11:57,040
They're my mates. Enough, Luke.
217
00:11:57,120 --> 00:11:58,640
Mr Sloane.
218
00:11:59,880 --> 00:12:02,320
May I have a word with you, please?
219
00:12:03,480 --> 00:12:05,360
We were just having a laugh.
220
00:12:10,360 --> 00:12:11,600
Go on, say it.
221
00:12:13,200 --> 00:12:15,240
Well done.
222
00:12:15,320 --> 00:12:17,200
Excuse me?
223
00:12:17,280 --> 00:12:20,520
I've been wanting to do that to
those two for years.
224
00:12:20,600 --> 00:12:23,440
I rather enjoyed it.
Quite cathartic.
225
00:12:24,960 --> 00:12:26,080
So I'm not sacked?
226
00:12:26,160 --> 00:12:28,240
Don't be ridiculous.
227
00:12:28,320 --> 00:12:30,640
Of course you are.
Clear out your things.
228
00:12:57,074 --> 00:12:59,914
Interesting that you've
suddenly found the time for films,
229
00:12:59,994 --> 00:13:01,474
concerts and dining out,
230
00:13:01,554 --> 00:13:04,394
since none of that seemed to interest
you much when we were together.
231
00:13:04,474 --> 00:13:08,074
Well, perhaps I learnt a lesson from
your profound unhappiness, Janet.
232
00:13:08,154 --> 00:13:11,234
It's a shame you're applying
those lessons to the wrong person.
233
00:13:11,314 --> 00:13:14,394
She's only going to break your heart.
Do you think so? I know so.
234
00:13:14,474 --> 00:13:17,314
She's young, pretty and
free-spirited.
235
00:13:17,394 --> 00:13:19,634
You're an overweight,
uptight, middle-aged,
236
00:13:19,714 --> 00:13:21,754
unemployed accountant
who wears a clip-on tie.
237
00:13:23,874 --> 00:13:26,154
You're right. I'll lose the tie.
238
00:13:38,474 --> 00:13:44,474
? At the party she was
kindness in the hard crowd
239
00:13:46,954 --> 00:13:52,074
? Consolation for the old wound
now forgotten... ?
240
00:13:55,274 --> 00:13:57,594
So, would you have come
if I'd have told you?
241
00:13:57,674 --> 00:14:00,634
I don't think so. I feel like
an accountant at an orgy.
242
00:14:00,714 --> 00:14:03,234
Come to think of it,
that's not even a metaphor.
243
00:14:03,314 --> 00:14:05,114
Let's just go to the pub, please.
244
00:14:05,194 --> 00:14:07,714
Stop. Didn't you push some
kids in a puddle today?
245
00:14:07,794 --> 00:14:09,234
That's very rock 'n' roll.
246
00:14:17,114 --> 00:14:19,394
I don't belong here.
247
00:14:19,474 --> 00:14:22,034
I mean, look at this wally.
248
00:14:22,114 --> 00:14:24,354
Who wears sunglasses
in a dark nightclub?
249
00:14:24,434 --> 00:14:26,074
Oh, shit.
250
00:14:27,914 --> 00:14:30,834
Robin, baby.
Wow, it's good to see you.
251
00:14:30,914 --> 00:14:33,234
You look fucking great.
What are you doing here?
252
00:14:33,314 --> 00:14:36,834
Jason and Bobby are going on after
the DJ so I came to hang out.
253
00:14:36,914 --> 00:14:39,634
It's funny, I was going
to call you. Hello!
254
00:14:39,714 --> 00:14:42,834
Sorry. Sloane, this is Craig.
Craig, Sloane.
255
00:14:42,914 --> 00:14:46,394
Stoned? No, no, Sloane.
With an E, like the square.
256
00:14:46,474 --> 00:14:49,074
Oh, right, square.
Yeah, that makes sense.
257
00:14:50,674 --> 00:14:52,874
Where's your dog?
Excuse me?
258
00:14:52,954 --> 00:14:54,354
Your guide dog, for the...
259
00:14:54,434 --> 00:14:58,674
He's making a joke about your
sunglasses. Oh, right. Good one.
260
00:14:58,754 --> 00:15:01,914
So are you two here together?
261
00:15:01,994 --> 00:15:03,394
Yep.
262
00:15:03,474 --> 00:15:06,114
Ah. OK. Great.
263
00:15:06,194 --> 00:15:08,194
So how'd you guys meet?
264
00:15:08,274 --> 00:15:12,514
We were... Sloane and I,
he helped me.
265
00:15:12,594 --> 00:15:15,234
I had a leaky faucet so he came over.
So he's your plumber?
266
00:15:15,314 --> 00:15:17,434
No, no, I'm not her plumber.
But you're a plumber?
267
00:15:17,514 --> 00:15:19,234
At least he has a job.
But not as a plumber.
268
00:15:19,274 --> 00:15:21,954
Sorry, what's that supposed to mean?
Why don't you figure it out?
269
00:15:22,034 --> 00:15:24,514
OK. Drinks. I'm going to get a
drink. Do you want a drink? Yep.
270
00:15:24,594 --> 00:15:26,154
Yep. OK, good.
271
00:15:28,114 --> 00:15:29,634
Hey, sorry.
272
00:15:29,714 --> 00:15:32,674
Can I have a pint of bitter
and a gin and tonic, please?
273
00:15:35,434 --> 00:15:37,994
Don't look now, but we're
the oldest people in here.
274
00:15:38,074 --> 00:15:39,794
Huh! Nancy!
275
00:15:40,834 --> 00:15:42,954
Hello, Sloane. Hello.
276
00:15:43,034 --> 00:15:45,394
What are you doing here?
277
00:15:45,474 --> 00:15:47,994
Oh, I'm just in town
visiting my mum for Christmas.
278
00:15:48,074 --> 00:15:49,714
I could ask you the same question.
279
00:15:49,794 --> 00:15:51,954
You're the last person
I'd expect to see in here.
280
00:15:52,034 --> 00:15:55,634
Yeah, well,
I'm trying to broaden my horizons.
281
00:15:55,714 --> 00:15:58,714
I heard you and Janet divorced.
I never saw that coming.
282
00:15:58,794 --> 00:16:00,794
Not divorced,
just separated, actually.
283
00:16:00,874 --> 00:16:04,314
Oh, right, so you might still...
Yeah. Yeah, a bit of time off.
284
00:16:04,394 --> 00:16:06,474
Come back stronger than ever.
285
00:16:06,554 --> 00:16:07,874
Thank you. Cheers.
286
00:16:07,954 --> 00:16:10,474
Well, merry Christmas.
287
00:16:10,554 --> 00:16:13,434
And to thee. Merry Christmas.
288
00:16:13,514 --> 00:16:17,034
Hmm. Ah.
289
00:16:19,154 --> 00:16:21,754
Relax. I know Reggie's
getting married again.
290
00:16:21,834 --> 00:16:24,234
Ah, OK. Good luck to her.
291
00:16:24,314 --> 00:16:26,994
That's one leopard who's
not changing his spots.
292
00:16:27,074 --> 00:16:28,514
Reggie's all right. He's just...
293
00:16:28,594 --> 00:16:31,034
He's a shit... a shit.
294
00:16:31,114 --> 00:16:34,034
Mind you, what does that say
about me? I married him.
295
00:16:34,114 --> 00:16:36,234
When I could've had a
nice boy like you.
296
00:16:38,634 --> 00:16:40,954
Did you know I fancied
you all those years?
297
00:16:42,594 --> 00:16:45,474
Of course I did, Sloane.
I liked you, too.
298
00:16:46,634 --> 00:16:48,594
But you never even spoke to me.
299
00:16:50,514 --> 00:16:53,634
Well, water under the bridge, huh?
Yeah, that's right.
300
00:16:57,514 --> 00:16:59,394
It's never too late, you know?
301
00:17:02,714 --> 00:17:05,194
It feels weird.
302
00:17:05,274 --> 00:17:08,074
Sorry, it's just your
hand being there.
303
00:17:08,154 --> 00:17:11,514
You know, that hand that was
married to one of my best mates.
304
00:17:11,594 --> 00:17:13,354
Fair enough.
305
00:17:13,434 --> 00:17:15,594
I just hope you don't end up
a bitter old man
306
00:17:15,674 --> 00:17:18,554
regretting all your missed
opportunities.
307
00:17:18,634 --> 00:17:21,274
That's the second time in three days
someone's said that to me.
308
00:17:21,354 --> 00:17:23,354
Well, if the shoe fits.
309
00:17:23,434 --> 00:17:26,794
I'm flattered. I am flattered,
but I came here with someone.
310
00:17:32,394 --> 00:17:34,514
Lovely to see you again, Jeremy.
311
00:17:34,594 --> 00:17:36,954
It was great seeing you too, Nancy.
312
00:17:39,554 --> 00:17:41,154
See you later.
313
00:17:44,714 --> 00:17:47,194
Watch it!
314
00:17:47,274 --> 00:17:48,554
Ow.
315
00:17:48,634 --> 00:17:51,634
Thanks, Jeremy. Oh, thanks, man.
316
00:17:51,714 --> 00:17:55,114
I think I'm going to go.
What? No! Why?
317
00:17:55,194 --> 00:17:57,474
It's too loud. And I think
the two of you need to talk.
318
00:17:57,554 --> 00:18:00,434
Stick around, man. We're all going
to hang out later and get down.
319
00:18:00,514 --> 00:18:03,994
It'll be cool. Well, I'm sorry, man,
I'm sure it will be... cool,
320
00:18:04,074 --> 00:18:06,154
but you'll just have to
get down without me.
321
00:18:06,234 --> 00:18:08,634
Jeremy, I came with you,
I'm leaving with you.
322
00:18:08,714 --> 00:18:11,874
Come on, let's dance. I can't.
Sure you can. Come on.
323
00:18:11,954 --> 00:18:13,114
Yeah, I'd like to see this.
324
00:18:13,194 --> 00:18:14,674
I'm surprised you can see anything
325
00:18:14,754 --> 00:18:17,914
with your head so far up your
fucking... OK. OK. Come on.
326
00:18:17,994 --> 00:18:20,314
Look, it's easy.
Just let the music move you.
327
00:18:28,114 --> 00:18:30,634
Nothing is moving.
Come on.
328
00:18:30,714 --> 00:18:32,954
No.
329
00:18:33,034 --> 00:18:36,354
? For you love
For your love... ?
330
00:18:36,434 --> 00:18:38,594
There we go. Ah...
331
00:18:43,994 --> 00:18:45,274
Come on. There you go.
332
00:18:46,394 --> 00:18:48,434
Now you're getting it.
333
00:18:52,434 --> 00:18:55,194
You're doing great, Jeremy.
334
00:18:57,514 --> 00:19:00,634
I don't know if you're being
ironic or not, but I love it.
335
00:19:04,594 --> 00:19:06,554
That's it.
336
00:19:08,954 --> 00:19:10,714
Oh, Christ, I'm sorry.
337
00:19:10,794 --> 00:19:14,154
Watch it, mate!
All right!
338
00:19:14,234 --> 00:19:18,234
You again? It was him, he pushed me.
339
00:19:18,314 --> 00:19:23,034
? For your love... ?
340
00:19:26,274 --> 00:19:29,154
Come on, Jeremy. Sorry.
Excuse me.
341
00:19:31,314 --> 00:19:36,394
Mr Sloane? Hello? It's only me.
342
00:19:36,474 --> 00:19:38,594
I've let myself in.
343
00:20:02,314 --> 00:20:03,914
"Where's your guide dog?"
344
00:20:03,994 --> 00:20:06,514
I don't think he had any idea
what you were talking about.
345
00:20:06,594 --> 00:20:07,714
Ah, well, you know...
346
00:20:07,794 --> 00:20:10,914
Oh, you really make me laugh, that's
for sure. Glad to be of service.
347
00:20:12,434 --> 00:20:14,714
What was all this about? That...
348
00:20:14,794 --> 00:20:17,314
That is a move that
I call the nervous crab.
349
00:20:22,074 --> 00:20:23,394
? Chestnuts roasting on... ?
350
00:20:23,474 --> 00:20:25,034
Oh, I love this song.
351
00:20:28,914 --> 00:20:32,114
? Jack Frost nipping at your nose
352
00:20:35,914 --> 00:20:38,274
? Yuletide carols... ?
353
00:20:43,514 --> 00:20:45,034
What are you going?
354
00:20:51,114 --> 00:20:56,434
? He's loaded lots of toys and
goodies on his sleigh... ?
355
00:20:58,314 --> 00:21:01,754
Would you do me the honour?
Oh, my God, really?
356
00:21:01,834 --> 00:21:03,554
Yes. Come on.
357
00:21:05,394 --> 00:21:09,314
? To see
if reindeer really know how to fly
358
00:21:11,594 --> 00:21:17,354
? And so I'm offering
this simple phrase... ?
359
00:21:17,434 --> 00:21:18,834
Wow.
360
00:21:20,354 --> 00:21:24,154
? To kids from one to 92... ?
361
00:21:24,234 --> 00:21:25,634
Oh! Hmm.
362
00:21:25,714 --> 00:21:27,594
Ooh, hey!
363
00:21:27,674 --> 00:21:32,114
? Although it's been said many times,
many ways
364
00:21:32,194 --> 00:21:39,754
? Merry Christmas to you... ?
365
00:21:39,834 --> 00:21:42,314
Nigel? Are you in here?
366
00:21:44,914 --> 00:21:47,994
Oh, there you are,
you silly little boy.
367
00:21:48,074 --> 00:21:50,114
How did you get in here?
368
00:21:50,194 --> 00:21:52,274
Now, come home with mummy.
369
00:22:10,514 --> 00:22:12,074
Merry Christmas.
370
00:22:21,874 --> 00:22:28,234
? And so I'm offering this
simple phrase
371
00:22:30,474 --> 00:22:35,674
? To kids from one to 92
372
00:22:37,674 --> 00:22:42,834
? Although it's been said many times,
many ways
373
00:22:42,914 --> 00:22:50,834
? Merry Christmas to you. ?
374
00:23:02,594 --> 00:23:05,234
Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd
375
00:23:05,314 --> 00:23:07,754
accessibility@bskyb.com
376
00:23:07,804 --> 00:23:12,354
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