All language subtitles for S.W.A.T. 4x09 - Next of Kin (English)

Previously on SWAT...

I'ml've been looking
aroundht. For a new place.

Might be able to lock down
something swanky with a roommate

- to share costs.
- Are you kidding?

- Hell yeah!
- All right!

So, housewarming.

I'll handle the margaritas,

- you handle the music.
- Sure.

Hey, Hondo, you got someone
to cover for me tomorrow?

Erika could cover for you.
Rocker's team has tomorrow off.

- She'd be down for it.
- You think this is the

white supremacist group
the Imperial Dukes?

That's my worry.

These aren't just smash-and-grabs.

They're coordinated hate crimes.

The guy I arrested yesterday was wearing

- the same kind of bandana.
- Abel McConnell

was spotted entering the
compound about 40 minutes ago.

Give me two!

Shots fired! Coming from the attic.

Guten Tag, Chris. What's up?

Hey. Are you okay?

She's dead.

Whoa, what are you talking about?
Who's dead?

Erika.

Erika Rogers? What happened, Chris?

It all went down so fast.
During the raid...

...a bullet winged Tan.

I'm hit!

I'll cover you. Go, go!

Erika and I brought him out safe.

He's okay.

Suspect down. Clear for entry.

You okay? Hey.

I think I was hit, too.

We didn't know Erika got hit
until just after.

It was an armor-piercing round
from the shooter.

All units...

58-David is down.

I repeat, 58-David is down.

We've lost Erika Rogers.

Over.

Dear God.

Hondo, call FID, tell 'em we
have an officer down.

I'll call Chief Rivera.

I have to notify
Officer Rogers's next of kin

before the press leaks it.

Roger that, Commander.

Commander.

Alonso, what are you doing?

You're gonna tell Erika's sister.

I want to come with you.

You need to go back to the scene.

This is an officer-involved shooting.

You and the team have to talk
to FID before anyone else.

Please, Commander.

I'm sorry. Go back.

That's an order.

I'm sorry to lay this on you,
but they got us separated.

There's no one here for me to talk to.

I think I'm freaking out.

No, I'm glad you called me.

Did you tell Deac yet?

Hondo called him right after
we finished with FID.

I don't know what to do.

We've never lost a teammate before.

SWAT doesn't lose officers.

Man, I wish I could be there
for you right now.

Please stay on the phone with me.

I'm here as long as you need me.

I'm not going anywhere.

The chief and I extend
our deepest sympathies

to you and your family.

An assistance officer
will be here shortly

to help you make arrangements.

What's her sister's name?

Latasha. She's Officer Rogers's

only next of kin in the city.

Chief Rivera, it should be me.
I should tell her.

Are you sure, Commander?

Yes, sir.

Okay. I'll follow your lead.

All right.

Ms. Rogers...

Oh, my God. No.

- Ma'am...
- No.

I regret to inform you
that your sister died

- in the line of duty earlier today.
- No, please.

No!

I'm so sorry, Latasha.

- Please...
- The chief and I extend

our deepest sympathies
to you and your family.

No...

Synced & corrected by -robtor-
www.addic7ed.com

I've gone on record befores.
Saying that money's going

to all the wrong places in this city.

In all her infinite wisdom...

That was quite a service
this morning, Commander.

Glad to see Officer Rogers's
extended family

came in from Houston.

They could see cops from as far
as New York to Maryland attended.

We're gonna have a plaque
in honor of her memory

- and service here at HQ.
- That's a great gesture.

I came to tell you that FID's
finished its investigation

of 20-Squad's raid.

Our union rep's delivering their
report by the end of today.

Any sense how it's looking for us?

I haven't heard either way.

City Councilman Dudley's

been criticizing SWAT pretty hard

the past few days.

A civilian and a Black
female officer killed.

- It's horrible optics.
- I get that.

And we're examining everything
on our end.

It's a tragedy we all feel personally.

In politics, tragedies
provide opportunity.

Dudley's running for mayor.

And after the past summer's unrest,

the mayor is in the hot seat.

People want reform. That includes LAPD

- and city hall.
- Some people want sincere reform,

- others just want a power grab.
- Either way,

the public may demand a pound of flesh.

We train the right way.

We do things the right way.

Let's hope the FID report
clears your officers.

Nichelle, hey.

Hey. You working today?

They got us on desk duty until
the FID report comes back.

Well, I won't keep you.

We really don't get to
speak much these days.

I haven't seen you stop by
the community center lately.

Just wanted to check in,

see how the funeral went.

The team's taking it pretty hard,

but we're all showing up.

And how about you?

I don't know, I'm, uh...

still processing.

Well, I know you're trying
to get better at opening up.

If you want to talk,
you know where to find me.

I do. Thank you, Nichelle.

Heard the FID report's coming out today.

Keep your head up.

Thanks, man.

Rocker... I am so sorry about Erika.

She was a great team member.

You know, curious, great spirit.

Constantly asking questions.

She admired you, Hondo.

Looks like you're retracing
your steps from the raid?

I'm doing what I can.

I have no idea what
that report's gonna say, so...

I just want to make sure that I remember

how everything went down...

in case I got to defend my decisions.

Here.

David, I know it's not the
best time to ask, but...

- do you need to go back?
- Yeah.

I'm the only member of the squad
that's cleared for field duty,

so I have to go back if we get a call.

I mean, to SWAT. Period.

Are you open to leaving?

You mean retiring?

Annie, I'm a year away
from collecting my pension.

Yeah, but private security's
going so well.

You've got great benefits.

And if you did that full-time,
you'd still have a great job

that you love, and you wouldn't be

in this kind of danger all the time.

Can we talk about this later?

What if later is too late?

If you were there three days ago,

that might have been
your funeral instead of Erika's.

You don't know that.

Where does that put me and the kids?

I can't do all this without you.

I don't ever want to.

I'm sorry, this morning at the service,

it's just, things got too real.

Just quit while you're ahead.

We'll talk tonight.

Unless you get too busy with work.

I got to go. I'm sorry.

Okay.

Jim, your backpack.

Thank you.

You didn't say a word
the whole drive in.

Sorry, I'm just not feeling
very talkative.

We all knew Erika, worked with her...

She meant a lot to all of us.

- Especially Chris.
- I understand all that.

But there's something else.

You've been tossing in your sleep.

Normally, that means you're
nervous about something.

Look, don't worry about me.

Okay?

See you later?

Okay. I love you.

Love you, too.

Alonso. Need a word with you.

Listen, until the FID report comes back,

everybody's benched and on desk duty.

But you personally still haven't
been cleared to return to HQ.

- Why not?
- Dr. Hughes hasn't signed off

on your psych eval.

Well, that's crap. I'm fine.

She wants to see you again.

Said she has some reservations.

Reservations? Like what, exactly?

I'm not the shrink.

But maybe you living with Erika
is a factor.

And until the issue's resolved

to the satisfaction of the doc,

I have to abide by her recommendations.

Understood, Commander.

Guys, focus!

Durham, monkey grip, man.

Why they call 'em
"monkey bars." Let's go!

Thanks for letting me stand in for you,

supervise the candidates.

Well, if you're gonna be on desk duty,

might as well be of some use.

- What round are they on?
- Ten.

Let's go, Malhotra. Get up there.

Stop this.

What are you two doing?

Trying to be the best
versions of ourselves.

It's a rhetorical question, man.

You're both trying
to make it onto SWAT, okay?

You think this is hard, wait
till you get out in the field.

It can be, uh... it can be rough.

And we need to know

you can deal with that. You guys got it?

It's not rhetorical. You guys got it?

- Yes, sir.
- Yes, sir.

Let's go.

Hey, Durham,

listen, I know you're tired.

Don't think of that as weight.

Think of that as a life.

All right? It's mental.

You get over that wall, they survive.

Calibrate. Let's go. You can do it.

Copy that, will do.
Thanks, Sergeant Kay.

Let's go.

- Riding them pretty hard.
- Shouldn't I?

Thought we were gonna ease up
the last week of SWAT school.

It's not that kind of week.

Chris. I know you wanted
to see me again, but, uh,

I think I deserve to be back
in HQ with the rest of my team.

I have reservations.

I learned that you personally
lobbied for Erika

to fill in on 20-Squad
the day that she got killed.

I want to make sure you don't
have any self-condemnation

or guilt about that.

I appreciate it, Doc,
but I'm good to go.

I don't need another psych eval.

You two were roommates. I, uh, I imagine

you were very close.

We just moved into that place.

And all of her belongings
are still at your apartment.

You see them every time
you go back home.

How does that make you feel?

You haven't been back home
since Erika was killed.

Is that right?

Does any of that really matter?

Where have you been
spending your nights?

- At my uncle's house.
- Chris.

You need to go home.

Why? This is home.

And I'm here, and I can help my team

back out in the field
once the FID report drops.

Who's gonna pack up Erika's belongings?

How are you supposed to move on?

In order to deal with this,

you need to go back to where you live.

And if that means
it takes more time, so be it,

but I can't sign off on you

until you can process this situation.

Do you understand what I'm telling you?

Yeah.

I got it.

Good. Come talk to me tomorrow.

I want to help you through this.

Do you have anything to help me sleep?

Yo, Deac.

Listen, um,

I was hoping you could
help me out with something.

Sure. What do you need?

FID did a walk-through
of the Imperial Dukes' compound,

but I want to do one of my own,

and I could really use
a pair of fresh eyes on it.

FID's report comes out later today.

What difference does it
make if you and I walk it?

I need to know that the team
did everything right.

You, uh, you clear this with Hicks?

Yeah. Look, we can take two cars

just in case you get called
into the field.

Deacon, you weren't there, man.

It was tough to see.

And I want to make sure we did
everything right by Erika.

Yeah, of course. Whatever you need.

Appreciate you.

The way we entered, in tight formation,

it was our best approach
given the intel that we had.

No, I know
the four-side entry made sense.

It gave you cover on the approach.

But a breach from the front

might have prevented McConnell
from fleeing upstairs.

You've already studied
this place on your own.

Yeah. I read everyone's
after action reports.

Did a virtual walkthrough
of the crime scene.

Just to get the facts.
It's nothing personal.

I'm not auditing your work.

But you think I did something wrong.

No, it's... it's not that clear.

Deacon, when we breached,
I had to pick between

two different approaches
based on limited intel.

If you were team leader,

would you have made the other call?

Doesn't matter.

Neither option was 100% safe.

The fact is another approach
could have been utilized,

and FID might use that against us.

Because they have the benefit of
having all the information now.

I know it's hard
waiting on an FID decision.

But nothing you or I do at this point

is gonna affect the outcome
of their investigation.

Maybe we can do something
other than play

Monday morning quarterback.

The white nationalists
who killed Erika...

The Imperial Dukes...
They're a terrorist group

that operates through independent cells

made up of four to eight members.

Now, we've already
taken down four of them,

but I can't shake the feeling
that there's more out there.

And to find them, I want to
search every inch of this place.

Maybe we can get a lead on more members.

Possibly another cell.

From what I've read, the Imperial Dukes

pervert Christian beliefs.

They claim they're fighting
a holy race war

that's happening
everywhere in the shadows.

With their pop culture references,

- their dog whistle tactics...
- They see any kind of change,

any shift in power, as a threat.

Deacon, if we had come
from this direction,

we would have breached the house
from the front.

And we might have been able
to keep McConnell

from going up those stairs.

And we would have seen
that some of these shell casings

were for armor-piercing rounds.

Hondo, it's tough to tell from these.

You didn't know what
you were fully up against

until Erika took a 5.56 to the chest.

Anything else you learn
from your deep dive earlier?

I get why everyone's on edge,

but y-you don't normally
second-guess yourself like this.

I don't normally
get one of my own killed.

It was your bullet that
hit Abel McConnell.

You killed the guy that killed Erika.

You're the one that took him out.

That's got to give you some solace.

It doesn't.

Wait a minute.

What?

Target positions. The cover pattern.

The dimensions of the alley.
I know this layout.

This training course is exactly
like one at Pendleton.

It's a carbon copy, man.

Whoever built this might have served

in the Marines around
the same time I did.

I'm sure the feds picked up on that?

No, no, don't be so sure, Deac.

Pendleton updates its courses
every few years.

This is an old layout.

Whoever built it served when I did.

- Sounds like a lead.
- You're damn straight.

Been working off Hondo's theory.

None of the four Imperial Dukes
we took down three days ago

served in the Marines.

So if none of these guys
built the training course,

our builder's still out there.

Started a profile on our suspect.

Cross-checked white males in
their 40s with carpentry skills

against Marine Corps
enrollment for L.A. County.

That description doesn't
exactly narrow things down.

Almost 2,000 guys fit the bill.

But I found something
that might help us. Look.

Erika's funeral wasn't the
only one scheduled for today.

Abel McConnell, the
Imperial Duke who killed Erika,

- his funeral's this afternoon.
- The FBI is already

staking out the small group
expected to turn out in person,

but this funeral
is also being livestreamed.

If we can get a warrant, we can
stake it out electronically.

Anyone who's attending
could be an Imperial Duke

or our course builder.

I'm tired of it,
and so is the city council.

This isn't the first time
our mayor has made Los Angeles

front-page news
for all the wrong reasons.

There was a period of time two year...

I just came from city hall.

How's the mayor taking him
politicizing a tragedy?

She didn't say.

She does want me to notify her

about the FID report
as soon as it comes in.

Well, that's an interesting way
of saying she's got our backs.

The mayor's in a tough spot.

Some people are calling
for her to resign.

So SWAT's being used
in a political chess match,

and she's already thinking
about how to protect herself?

By sacrificing one of my pieces?

She's a politician.
Erika's death affects her, too,

in a different way.

It takes a certain kind of officer

to go through
Erika's death three days ago,

and then show up here
the same day of her funeral.

They're not pawns. They're human beings.

The mayor knows what you
all went through that day.

She doesn't want FID's report
to be a problem

any more than you do.

I can think of someone who does.

If you can fast-track that warrant,

we'll be ready to observe from our end.

All right. Thanks, Agent Carr.

Sergeant Kay.

Hey, I just wanted to say I
appreciated that pep talk

out there this morning. This
has been the toughest week yet.

I'm glad I could help.

Listen, keep pushing yourself,
finish strong,

you'll be out in the field soon.

Hey, look, I know it's not my place,

but I get what happened out there.

And I feel for what you and your
team are going through right now.

Thank you. It's been tough.

I just think that, with who you are,

if you would've been there,

things could've panned out differently.

They really missed
your leadership that day.

- Appreciate that.
- Yeah.

Durham's making the
strongest case so far.

Just ahead of Malhotra.

Yeah. Kid's got a good heart.

He's just got to keep his head down.

How you holding up?

I've been organizing food
for Erika's extended family.

I had to help them.
I just needed something positive

to put my mind to the past few days.

Late night, been going to the gym,

hitting the bag till my arms give out.

It's the only way I can get any sleep.

Sounds like you're heading
in the right direction.

Yeah. Yeah, thanks
for checking on me, Deac.

I hope we can all get
out in the field together soon.

Pretty sure that's what
Erika would want.

Aside from justice.

Yeah. God willing,
it works out that way, huh?

Let me know if you need anything.

Yeah. I will.

How many people out there...
Lawyers, grocers, mechanics...

Moonlight as white nationalists?

They just look like regular people.

That's what's frightening.

Six people are attending in person.

78 logged on remotely.

Anything on our anonymous attendees?

Looking at 'em.

Ten of them are using VPNs
to hide their identities.

Now, I thought that seemed
a little too high-tech

for our builder at first.

It could also mean that he's getting
help from other Imperial Dukes.

Okay, wait a minute.
This could be something.

One of the client ISPs is
registered to Landon McBride.

He's a former Marine.

Two tours in Afghanistan.

And he was at Pendleton

when that same training
course was up, Deac.

Received a dishonorable discharge,
and he's got a jacket.

Prior for a felony
unlawful use of a weapon,

and he's got an outstanding
warrant for the assault.

Gives us a reason to talk to him.

That's his last known address.

I'm still on desk duty, Deac.
I can't roll on this, just you.

All right, I'll grab a patrol officer.

I'll call you from the house.

I'll check McBride's tax records,

see what they turn up.

Ma'am. I'm Sergeant Kay, LAPD.

Looking for Landon McBride.

I kicked him out four months back.

What'd he do now?

We've got reason to believe
that he helped some people

murder a police officer three days ago.

My God.

Does this have anything to do
with that online group he joined?

Possibly. Did he ever
refer to it by name?

Did he ever mention a group
called the Imperial Dukes?

No. Look, I'm sorry, I want to help,

but I broke off all contact with him

after he assaulted a protester.

But it sounds like he escalated.

Got worse over the last few months.

You have any idea where he might be?

Any friends or colleagues
he's hanging out with?

He leave anything behind?

No, I tossed all his crap.

His drafting table, schematics.

- Your boyfriend was a builder?
- Ex-boyfriend.

He was all right until he
got laid off last year.

Told me he was pushed out
in favor of other people.

Said new hiring quotas
discriminated against him.

I'm sure it was a bit
more complicated than that,

but Landon is a simple man.

I'm guessing he went down
the rabbit hole after that?

Yeah. Wasn't long before he
found that online group.

They fed his anger,

forced some ugly tattoos on him and...

well, pushed him down a darker path.

That laptop.

It's a few years old.

- You two share it?
- Yeah.

His account's password
protected, though.

I don't know it.

Hey, Chris, what's up?

I know it's late there.
I shouldn't have called. My bad.

You talk to Dr. Wendy today?

Yeah. We got a path laid out.

Gonna try it again tomorrow.

Good. Means you're heading
in the right direction.

Are you okay, Chris? Where are you?

I'm outside of my apartment.
In the hallway.

You're stalling.

You've got to go in
and pack Erika's stuff.

And as hard as it is,
You've got to handle it.

I know you learned some German
when you were in K-9.

You know, I've been
hanging out with these guys

that have been teaching me
single German words

that actually mean full
sentences in English. It's wild.

- Kopf hoch.
- Yeah.

It means, uh, to keep your head
held high.

That's right. It made me think of you.

'Cause you always keep
your head up, Chris.

Now, come on.

You got this.

Got McBride's tax records.

He's a freelance contractor.

Hired to work four construction
sites in the last quarter.

Put out a BOLO, unis see him
at any of the sites, we'll know.

His girl's laptop give us anything?

FBI got us into McBride's account.

He's definitely been taking pointers

from someone who's tech savvy.

He's tried to cover his tracks
by drafting.

Puts messages in a folder,

allows recipients
to log in and read 'em. Look.

Which means there's no send receipts.

But some of the unsent drafts
should still be recoverable.

Like messages from his other job.

Building things for the Imperial Dukes.

McBride suggested
identical building plans

for two other training courses.

So there's potentially two more
Imperial Duke cells out there.

Even though none of these
messages have been sent,

can we find out who read 'em?

Well, there's at least
one person with a login.

Could be the person
coordinating the cells.

- Imperial Dukes leader?
- Possibly.

I'll have the Feds do a deep
dive on the unidentified login.

BOLO got a hit on McBride.

Just got a call from a patrol unit

sitting on a site in City of Industry.

Saw McBride show up, then rabbit.

You better hurry, 'cause it's
an active high-speed chase now.

- Take Rocker with you, Deac.
- We'll get him for you, Hondo.

Not for me, Deac. For Erika.

Good work, Rocker.

Forcing him north keeps him in

the industrial park,
away from the freeway.

Hondo, he's heading east

on a frontage road.

Roger that, Deac.
We got eyes in the air.

Rocker,

there's a switchback up ahead.

- It loops around to the south.
- Copy that.

Whoa... Hey!

Nice work, guys. He's hemmed in.

Suspect's
fleeing. We're in foot pursuit.

Freeze! LAPD!

There's a residential
neighborhood to the north.

You got to stop him
before he gets to any civilians.

He's in the camper up ahead.

Now, he might have barricaded
himself inside, so be careful.

Landon McBride, LAPD SWAT.

Come on out, right now.
Hands in the air.

Real slow.

Hondo, cops on the scene found
designs of the Imperial Dukes'

training course in McBride's truck.

That might explain why he thought

running from the police was worth it.

- You guys copy that?
- Loud and clear, Hondo.

Drop your phone, put your
hands behind your head

and get on your knees. Do it now.

Don't my rights matter?

Doesn't my life matter?

Erika Rogers' life mattered.

Oh, the Black chick cop.

Yeah, I heard about that.

You built a training course
for white nationalists.

I'm proud of my heritage.

That isn't a crime. At least not yet.

Your friends shot and
killed a police officer.

That's aiding and abetting
domestic terrorism.

Face down, on the ground,

now.

He's not saying anything.

Because he doesn't think he needs to.

He doesn't need to help himself

because, in his mind,
the Imperial Dukes are gonna win

whatever war they're trying to fight.

He's a soldier and this
is the sacrifice he's making

for the same lost cause.

We've got the FBI looking to identify

the other hidden login
from McBride's e-mail.

Whoever this person is,
they are intelligent and cautious.

If it's the Dukes' leader
organizing all this,

then we're gonna find him.

But let's stay in the loop with the Feds

and be ready to make a move as
soon as they get a solid lead.

Roger that.

Listen, um...

I'm sorry about earlier,
at the compound.

I undermined you by
double-checking the raid.

No, Deac. You didn't.
It's your duty as a sergeant

to see if you could have
done it better three days ago.

Or at least know better
for the next raid.

It kills me that I was
on that school tour

and not with you and the team.

Everyone's dealing with this
in their own way, man.

No one's exempt.

FID report's in.

Hey, Ed, what do we got?

Commander. I supposed you
want to read their ruling?

"In regards to the events in question,

"Force Investigation Division
finds 20-Squad's actions

"to have been within policy.

"It hereby gives no
recommendation for discipline

"in the planning
or execution of the raid

"resulting in the deaths
of suspect Abel McConnell

and Officer Erika Rogers."

All right, so we're approved
for field duty again?

Well, Alonso still needs
to earn clearance

from Dr. Hughes, but the rest of you

are officially on call.

- What is it, Commander?
- There's more.

"It is, however, our opinion
that other strategies

"could have been utilized in the raid.

"Alternative actions may have produced

different results, and loss
of life may have been averted."

You got to be kidding me.

They're leaving us in a gray area.

Sir, even with other
strategies available,

they know that there was nothing
that could have guaranteed success.

Hondo's right, Commander.

This clears the team.

Lieutenant Lynch is on her way.

We may have been cleared technically,

but according to the mayor,
not politically.

So what happens now?

I think another shoe's about to drop.

Honestly, even with FID clearing us,

it doesn't make Erika's death
any easier.

Or maybe it's not supposed to.

It finally hit me.

She's gone, man. Forever.

Part of me still doesn't
want to accept it.

Listen...

after I lost Nate, it was brutal.

I found out that grief doesn't go away.

It stays.

Some days it's heavier than others.

But hopefully, on those heavy days

you got people beside you
that can help lighten the load.

Shockingly insightful
for a guy like you.

Well, Dr. Hughes said that last part.

I'm just filling you in.

I guess we should be thankful
we can keep doing our jobs.

Tell the people we care
about how important they are.

- Yeah.
- All right.

Although SWAT was cleared,

the possibility the team could
have done things differently

and avoided two people getting killed

is enough to increase pressure
on the mayor.

Hondo made the best
of two imperfect choices.

There was no risk-free option.

Doesn't matter. Not now.

The death of one
of our few African-American

female officers is not a good look.

Is that what this is all about?

How it looks?

We just lost a colleague. A friend.

I'm sorry, but the mayor wants a scalp.

And it needs to be someone on the team

or someone in command
that suggests accountability.

I'm not happy delivering the message.

But you agree with it.

No. But that's the message.

And I'll leave it up to you
to decide who it is, Commander.

I'm not giving you anyone from the team.

So...

...I guess the scalp
will have to be mine.

What's going on in here?

Sounds like I have to resign.

Like hell you do.

Hondo, this is political
fallout we're facing.

The mayor's hand is being forced.

Lieutenant, Commander Hicks
isn't responsible for anything

that happened three days ago.

No offense, but this is way
above your pay grade, Sergeant.

Is it?

Let me tell you something, Lieutenant.

The men and women
who take risks in the field...

We live in a completely different world

than the politicians who criticize us.

We are constantly thrown into situations

where there is a one percent chance

of things going horribly wrong.

That's duly noted.

Well, you put us in those
situations often enough,

that one percent is gonna come up,

and it came up three days ago.

The mayor can pretend all she wants

that it's a problem with leadership,

but I promise you, on everything I am,

that game could backfire on her ass.

Excuse me?

Hicks stays or I go.

And the first place I'm gonna go
is to the L.A. Times

and I'm-a talk about
the real systemic problems

within the LAPD that she,

the commission
and the union still ignore.

And I imagine they might even want

to run my picture with it.

I imagine this'll be a tough
conversation with the mayor.

Maybe we need to have
more tough conversations.

I know we haven't
always seen eye to eye,

but I admire the stances
you've both taken here.

It's admirable.

And frustrating.

You didn't have to do that.

Yes, I did.

Hang on a second, Latasha.

Thought you were Erika's sister.

Can I come in?

Just wanted to check up on you.

See how you were doing.

I'm, uh... I'm dealing.

I just keep thinking it's...

it's not fair, Erika dying.

I know. I hate it.

And I've hated myself
the past three days.

Been tossing and turning in my sleep.

It's been weighing on me.

What has?

When Erika went down,

initially I didn't
feel shock or sadness.

I was just relieved

that it wasn't you.

Chris, if you took that bullet

and I lost you...

I wouldn't have recovered.

I know our situation

is impossible.

I was on my way home to Molly
when I came here instead.

But being with her feels wrong.

Stop.

'Cause all I think
about is being with you.

Why are you telling me this?

Just...

Please leave.

Chris...

Leave. Now.

- Chris.
- Please go.

Hi.

Hi.

I love you. You know that.

Of course I do.

You and the kids...

You're everything to me.

What happened today?

Well, we grabbed another one
of the Imperial Dukes.

Well, that's great. Right?

Yeah.

But, uh...

...my team is broken.

I don't know if we're gonna be okay

until we... we grab every last one

of this crew.

So you don't want to retire.

I can't leave my team.

Not like this.

Annie...

...you're my family.

And so are they.

And I think God put me here

so I can help them.

- Hey.
- Hey.

I just thought I'd drop
by for a surprise visit,

if that's okay.

It was an open invitation.

Hm.

What is it?

Nichelle, uh...

I haven't been as open
with you as I should.

I want to tell you something that...

I probably wouldn't tell anyone else.

I'd be lying if I said
these past three days

haven't been some of the toughest.

You lost a friend. That can't be easy.

It's just, this past year, with...

with police misconduct,

Black folks getting killed on camera...

...and losing an officer
in the field, it just,

it cuts deep.

And now I got doubts
about whether the fight

to change things is even worth it.

It's natural to have doubts

when you're trying to make
a difference in people's lives.

I get it, Hondo.

But this... I mean,

it's got me wondering about
myself as a police officer,

as a leader

and as a Black man in this damn world.

I threatened to resign today.

To protect someone else.

I was willing to lose SWAT.

And they don't know it,
but I was not bluffing.

So what happened?

The mayor backed down.

So the heat's off of us, for now.

You felt like you
had to sacrifice yourself

to make a difference?

Yeah.

Yeah, because if we're all out
there trying to change things

for the better,
then why did Erika Rogers

have to pay a bigger price?

Hondo, you can't let that eat at you.

It'll only wear you down.

How do you manage
to push through all the noise?

Or maybe it's just looking
fearless just comes naturally.

Maybe I feel the same things you feel.

I just try to get it out,

talk it through,
like we're doing right now.

Do you hear that?

No. I don't hear anything.

That's what I'm talking about.

See? You're pushing through
the noise already.

A good leader has self-awareness

and the desire to do better, be better.

Insecurities don't make anyone
less of a leader, Hondo.

They make 'em human.

This is good, talking it through.

Yeah, you should try it more often.

Well, you available
for any more surprise visits?