Original subtitles

>> [ SILENCE ]

>> [ CHANTING ]

>> I WAS EXPECTING LIGHTNING AND

ANGELS AND TRUMPETS IN THE SKY,

AND ALL I GOT WAS A BUNCH OF

TREES AND GEESE FLYING IN THE

AIR.

[ CHUCKLES ]

AND I THOUGHT, "HOW FUNNY IS

THIS?"

>> IT JUST TOOK ME TO, LIKE, A

REALLY HEAVY PLACE.

I STRUGGLED WITH THAT, AND I

KNEW I HAD TO EITHER VOMIT OR

CRY, AND SO, FINALLY, I ENDED UP

BEING ABLE TO CRY AND REALLY LET

IT GO.

>> IT WAS A CLEARLY OVERWHELMING

SENSE THAT THERE WAS SOMETHING

MUCH BIGGER, AND THAT I WAS, YOU

KNOW, A SMALL, LITTLE ANT

[CHUCKLES] IN THIS MUCH BIGGER,

DIVINE ORGANIZATION OF THE

UNIVERSE, AND THAT I NEEDED TO

PAY ATTENTION TO THAT.

>> IT'S GOT ME IN TOUCH WITH MY

SPIRIT, WHICH I HAD, LIKE, NO

CONCEPT OF BEFORE.

IT OPENED MY HEART IN A WAY THAT

I NEVER HAD IT OPENED BEFORE,

EVER.

I COMMITTED TO HER THAT SHE

WOULD BE A TEACHER OF MINE FOR

MY LIFE.

>> THE SOURCE OF THE EXPERIENCE

OF WHICH THESE PEOPLE SPEAK IS

NOT A FAITH -- A BELIEF IN

THINGS UNSEEN.

IT IS SIMPLY THIS -- AN HERBAL

BREW MADE IN THE JUNGLES OF PERU

BY NATIVE SHAMANS.

THEY CALL IT AYAHUASCA, WHICH

MEANS "VINE OF THE SOUL."

>> IT'S A TEA, OR WHAT

HERBALISTS WOULD CALL A

DECOCTION, MEANING A STRONG TEA.

IT'S ALWAYS MADE FROM TWO

PLANTS, ONE OF WHICH CONTAINS

THE HALLUCINOGEN

DIMETHYLTRYPTAMINE, OR DMT.

DMT IS WHAT I CALL A TRUE

PSYCHEDELIC.

IT'S ONE OF THE CLASS THAT

INCLUDES LSD, PSILOCYBIN,

MESCALINE.

>> IN THE AMAZON, AYAHUASCA IS A

LEGALLY RECOGNIZED, SACRED

MEDICINE.

INDIGENOUS PEOPLE HAVE USED IT

FOR CENTURIES TO HEAL PHYSICAL

AND PSYCHO-SPIRITUAL ILLS.

[ CHILDREN LAUGHING ]

IT'S AN ESSENTIAL PART OF THE

CULTURE, WOVEN INTO THE FABRIC

OF THEIR LIVES.

BEYOND THE AMAZON, THE LEGALITY

OF AYAHUASCA IS A GRAY AREA.

>> THE GLOBALIZATION OF

AYAHUASCA IS A CHALLENGE FOR

MODERN DRUG-CONTROL AUTHORITIES.

THE PEOPLE WHO ARE USING IT

OUTSIDE OF ITS TRADITIONAL

CONTEXT ARE NOT THE CRIMINAL

ELEMENT THAT IS ASSOCIATED,

TRADITIONALLY, WITH ILLEGAL DRUG

USE.

THESE ARE PEOPLE LIKE MY

PARENTS, MY FRIENDS, DOCTORS,

LAWYERS, PEOPLE IN THE HEALTH

FIELD WHO ARE PASSING ALONG

KNOWLEDGE WORD OF MOUTH, AND IT

SEEMS TO BE SPREADING.

>> [ Laughing ] NO.

>> IN THE LAST 10 YEARS,

THOUSANDS HAVE TRIED AYAHUASCA,

SEEKING HEALING AND SPIRITUAL

GROWTH.

>> THE NOTION THAT THERE IS A

SPIRITUAL COMPONENT TO HEALING

HAS BEEN TOTALLY EXCISED FROM

BIO MEDICINE.

"SPIRITUALITY IN HEALING?

WHAT DOES SPIRITUALITY HAVE TO

DO WITH HEALING?"

>> WE LIVE IN A CULTURE THAT'S,

SPIRITUALLY, VERY DEPRIVED, VERY

EMPTY.

WE LIVE IN A CULTURE THAT'S VERY

MATERIAL-BASED.

IN OTHER WORDS, WE LIVE IN A

CULTURE THAT DOES NOT GIVE HUMAN

BEINGS WHAT THEY REALLY NEED.

THAT LEAVES A HUGE HOLE IN

PEOPLE.

[ CAR HORN HONKING ]

>> MOST PEOPLE IN NORTH AMERICA

AND THE WESTERN WORLD ARE NOT AS

CONNECTED AS PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN

THE JUNGLE AND LIVE IN NATURE,

YOU KNOW, EVERY DAY, 365 DAYS A

YEAR.

>> SHAMAN GUILLERMO ARéVALO

BELIEVES EVERYONE CAN RECLAIM

THIS CONNECTION THROUGH

AYAHUASCA, WHICH HE CALLS A

PLANT TEACHER.

HE SAYS THE VINE OF THE SOUL

ACTUALLY TEACHES YOU WHAT YOU

NEED TO KNOW.

WHAT IS THERE TO SHARE ABOUT

AYAHUASCA?

CAN IT REALLY HEAL OUR MINDS AND

SPIRITS?

TWO PEOPLE ARE ABOUT TO JOURNEY

TO THE AMAZON TO FIND OUT.

ROB WORKS AS AN ACCOUNTANT FOR A

MEDIA COMPANY.

IT'S A GOOD JOB AND PAYS THE

BILLS.

>> IT'S NOT SOMETHING YOU WALK

AWAY FROM ON A DAY-TO-DAY BASIS

FEELING SATISFIED, FOR THE MOST

PART.

>> HOW LONG'S THE FLIGHT?

>> IT'S AROUND -- I THINK IT'S

EIGHT HOURS INTO LIMA, AND THEN

ANOTHER THREE HOURS TO IQUITOS.

IF EVERYTHING GOES WELL, I'LL BE

A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT PERSON

NEXT THURSDAY.

>> WILL WE BE ABLE TO STILL

RECOGNIZE YOU?

>> OH, YEAH.

>> I'LL JUST BE GLOWING.

I WILL.

GOING DOWN TO PERU AT THIS POINT

IN MY LIFE MAKES A LOT OF SENSE

TO ME, PARTIALLY BECAUSE I'M NOW

ENTERING MIDDLE AGE, AND THERE'S

A LOT OF RE-EVALUATING THAT I

BELIEVE SHOULD GO ON.

I MEAN, IF YOU'RE UNCERTAIN OF

WHAT YOU BELIEVE IN, THEN YOU

HAVE TO START QUESTIONING ALL

THINGS THAT ARE CURRENTLY IN

YOUR LIFE, AND SEEING, MAYBE,

ANOTHER PATH TO TAKE.

>> KIRSTIE IS A DOCTOR OF

NATUROPATHIC MEDICINE.

>> YOU HAVE A REFERRED PAIN

PATTERN UP ON YOUR LEFT SIDE.

>> THERE'S A PINCHED NERVE IN MY

NECK.

>> HERE?

>> YEAH.

>> I'VE JUST STARTED AS A HEALER

MYSELF, AND I THINK IT'S A GOOD

TIME FOR ME IN MY LIFE TO GO

DOWN AND EXPERIENCE THIS,

BECAUSE IF IT'S IN ANY WAY,

SHAPE, OR FORM GONNA BE A PART

OF MY LIFE, WHETHER ACADEMICALLY

OR IN TERMS OF I'M ABLE TO USE

IT WITH PATIENTS, I WOULD NEVER

DO THAT UNLESS I, MYSELF, HAVE

BEEN THROUGH THE EXPERIENCE.

>> ARE YOU READY TO GO, ROB?

>> LET'S DO IT.

IN A NUTSHELL, WHAT IS MISSING

IN MY LIFE IS SPIRITUALITY.

I CAN SAY THAT WITH ALMOST

COMPLETE CERTAINTY.

WE HAD VERY, VERY SLIGHT

RELIGIOUS UPBRINGING THAT JUST

SEEMED TO HAVE NO FOUNDATION OR

NO BASIS FOR ME IN MY LIFE.

IT'S NOT THAT I DON'T UNDERSTAND

THAT THE BEST WAY TO LIVE IS TO

BE RIGHT AND BE RIGHT WITH

OTHERS, BUT I DON'T HAVE A

GUIDING LIGHT, PER SE.

>> WHILE ROB HAS NEVER BEEN TO

THE AMAZON, THE RAIN FOREST HAS

ALREADY SHAPED KIRSTIE'S LIFE.

>> I DID A LOT OF TRAVELING,

BOTH FOR WORK AND IN A VOLUNTEER

CAPACITY, AND I ALSO WAS A GUIDE

IN THE AMAZON AND WAS EXPOSED

TO AN ENORMOUS AMOUNT OF PLANT

MEDICINE.

I'VE READ AN AWFUL LOT ABOUT

AYAHUASCA, AND I'M JUST REALLY

INTERESTED IN ITS IMPLICATIONS

FOR A LOT OF PEOPLE WITH SEVERE,

CHRONIC DISEASE.

FROM WHAT I UNDERSTAND, IT

REALLY CAN OPEN UP A LOT OF

ENERGETIC BARRIERS THAT EVERYONE

HAS, AND IF THOSE BARRIERS ARE

OPENED UP, YOU CAN LIVE MORE

OPTIMALLY.

>> IN THE PAST, ROB HAS USED

RECREATIONAL DRUGS TO SEARCH FOR

GREATER MEANING IN HIS LIFE

WITHOUT SUCCESS.

>> I GUESS MY BIGGEST FEAR IS

SIMPLY JUST GETTING HIGH AGAIN

FOR TWO OR THREE DAYS AND REALLY

NOT HAVING IT COME TO ANY

FRUITION.

IT CAN'T BE ANYTHING REMOTELY

SIMILAR TO RECREATIONAL USE.

THAT'S WHAT I'M SICK OF, AND I

CERTAINLY DON'T HAVE TO GO TO

PERU TO EXPERIENCE IT.

>> ARE YOU ACTUALLY HOLDING THIS

UP?

DO YOU NEED ME?

>> LET'S GET THIS RIGHT HERE.

>> PERFECTO.

CUIDADO.

I DO FEEL SOME TREPIDATION

AROUND WHAT I WILL EXPERIENCE

AND WHAT I MIGHT DISCOVER ABOUT

MY OWN ENERGETIC BLOCKAGES, BUT

ABOUT AYAHUASCA, I'M NOT GOING

THROUGH THIS LIFE AND NOT DOING

[Chuckling] AYAHUASCA.

THERE IS NO WAY.

>> AFTER A LONG TRIP, ROB AND

KIRSTIE FINALLY ARRIVE AT THE

RUSTIC RETREAT ON THE EDGE OF

THE JUNGLE.

>> [ CHUCKLES ]

>> GUILLERMO IS THERE TO GREET

THEM, ALONG WITH AN

INTERNATIONAL GROUP OF FELLOW

TRAVELERS.

DAVE, A HEALER FROM CANADA,

BEGAN HIS APPRENTICESHIP WITH

GUILLERMO FIVE YEARS AGO.

>> AS SOON AS I STARTED, I

THOUGHT, "THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT

MY WHOLE LIFE WAS ABOUT."

I KNEW THAT THIS WAS MY LIFE

PATH, BUT I STILL HAD DOUBT

WHETHER I COULD ACTUALLY

ACCOMPLISH IT.

MY FIRST EXPERIENCE WITH

GUILLERMO WAS EXTREMELY,

EXTREMELY PROFOUND -- VERY, VERY

DEEP.

I REMEMBER HIM SAYING TO ME THAT

I WAS DAVID AND I WAS GONNA HAVE

TO FACE GOLIATH, AND GOLIATH

BEING THE FEAR INSIDE OF ME.

>> GUILLERMO HAS BEEN A SHAMAN

TO THE SHIPIBO PEOPLE MOST OF

HIS LIFE, BUT ONLY RECENTLY

OPENED A RETREAT FOR WESTERNERS.

>> MOSTLY WHEN PEOPLE HAVE BAD

LUCK IN LOVE.

[ LAUGHTER ]

>> NO TRANSLATION NEEDED.

THIS IS AYAHUASCA.

>> ALL ORGANISMS ON THE PLANET

ARE PARASITES ON PLANTS, BECAUSE

PLANTS ARE THE ONLY THING THAT

MAKE THEIR OWN FOOD, AND THEY

MAKE THEIR FOOD OUT OF SUNLIGHT,

WATER, AND CARBON DIOXIDE.

AND BECAUSE OF THAT, THEY ARE

RUNNING THE SHOW.

>> I'M EXTREMELY EXCITED ABOUT

TONIGHT.

WE'RE AT THE BIRTHPLACE WHERE

THE PLANTS ARE FROM, AND JUST

BEING UNDER AN ACCOMPLISHED

MASTER LIKE GUILLERMO HAS TO BE

JUST A ONCE-IN-A-LIFETIME

EXPERIENCE.

>> THROUGHOUT THE DAY, I THINK I

WENT THROUGH A LOT OF DIFFERENT

EMOTIONS AND THOUGHTS ABOUT IT.

YOU KNOW, SOME OF WHICH WAS SORT

OF ANXIETY -- "AM I A BIT TOO

TIRED TO BE DOING THIS

[Chuckling] AT THE MOMENT?"

BUT I ACTUALLY FEEL, AS I HAVE

SINCE I ARRIVED, REALLY PRETTY

PEACEFUL, SO HOPEFULLY THAT

BODES WELL FOR ME.

>> AS DARKNESS FALLS, ALL WHO

WISH TO PARTAKE IN THE AYAHUASCA

CEREMONY JOIN GUILLERMO AND HIS

ASSISTANT CURANDERO, FRANCOIS.

>> WHEN I WAS ASKED FOR MY

INTENTION, I FELT I DIDN'T

REALLY HAVE ONE, OR MAYBE I

HADN'T GIVEN IT ENOUGH THOUGHT,

AND IT KIND OF CONCERNED ME A

LITTLE BIT, THINKING THAT HERE I

WAS IN THIS GREAT CENTER FOR

HEALING, AND I DIDN'T COME DOWN

WITH A SPECIFIC PROBLEM.

>> MY INTENTION -- IT WAS A HARD

DECISION BECAUSE THERE ARE A LOT

OF THINGS THAT I WOULD LIKE TO

WORK ON, BUT THE THING I ELECTED

TO SORT OF WORK ON WAS IT'S

DIFFICULT FOR ME TO SEE, AS YET,

HOW I CAN INTEGRATE THIS ON A

PROFESSIONAL LEVEL.

I SPOKE TO GUILLERMO AND JUST

SAID, "CAN YOU HELP ME TO

UNDERSTAND, BECAUSE I FEEL,

INTUITIVELY, THAT THERE'S A

REASON THAT I'M HERE?"

GRACIAS.

>> [ CHANTING ]

>> I WAS AWARE OF MANY THINGS

HAPPENING ALL THE TIME BECAUSE

ALL OF MY SENSES WERE SO

HEIGHTENED.

>> [ CHANTING CONTINUES ]

>> YOU SIT THERE AND YOU WONDER

WHETHER OR NOT IT'S TAKING

EFFECT, AND AS SOON AS YOU ALLOW

THE CHANTING IN, IT PRETTY MUCH

TAKES YOU.

>> [ CHANTING CONTINUES ]

>> PURGING PREPARES THE MIND AND

BODY FOR THE INNER JOURNEY

AHEAD.

THE CHANTING THEN CARRIES PEOPLE

INTO A REALM BEYOND THE FIVE

SENSES.

>> [ CHANTING CONTINUES ]

>> THE CHANTING WAS

TRANSFORMATIONAL.

I ACTUALLY DON'T EVEN HAVE THE

WORDS TO DESCRIBE THAT.

>> [ CHANTING CONTINUES ]

>> I COULD FEEL PLANTS

QUIVERING, AND I COULD FEEL

EVERYTHING BREATHING AND I COULD

FEEL THE EARTH GROANING AND I

COULD HEAR EVERY SINGLE BIRD AND

JUST THIS BLISSED-OUT, INSANELY

POWERFUL CONNECTION WITH THE

EARTH AND WITH PLANTS AND WITH

ANIMALS.

I FELT A LOT OF JOY.

>> [ CHANTING CONTINUES ]

>> THE FEELING IS JUST SUBLIME.

I DON'T KNOW HOW TO EXPLAIN IT.

ALMOST EVERY LITTLE THING YOU DO

WITH YOUR BODY -- A SIMPLE HEAD

STRETCH, A DEEP BREATH, JUST

FEELS SO LIFE-AFFIRMING, BECAUSE

YOU SEEM TO BE IN COMPLETE

HARMONY WITH EVERYTHING AROUND

YOU.

YOU JUST KNOW THAT YOU'RE

CONNECTED TO SOMETHING LARGER.

>> [ CHANTING CONTINUES ]

>> MOST RELIGIONS MAKE A GREAT

DEAL ABOUT HOW YOU MUST HAVE

FAITH.

YOU MUST BELIEVE IN GOD, YOU

MUST BELIEVE IN WHAT WE TELL

YOU, EVEN THOUGH THERE'S NO

EVIDENCE TO SUPPORT IT, NO

EVIDENCE FOR WHAT WE'RE TELLING

YOU, BUT YOU MUST HAVE FAITH.

WHAT'S INTERESTING ABOUT

AYAHUASCA IS YOU DON'T HAVE TO

HAVE FAITH.

IT'S THE PERFECT TOOL FOR

SKEPTICS.

DON'T BELIEVE ME.

DON'T BELIEVE WHAT ANYBODY TELLS

YOU.

TAKE IT.

HAVE THE EXPERIENCE.

EVALUATE IT FOR YOURSELF.

MAKE OF IT WHAT YOU WILL.

>> LAST NIGHT, BECAUSE WE'VE

BEEN LOOKING FORWARD TO IT FOR

QUITE A FEW WEEKS NOW, I HAD A

LOT OF EXPECTATIONS BUILT UP,

AND THE CEREMONY ITSELF WAS VERY

IMPRESSIVE, BUT I THINK I DIDN'T

HAVE A STRONG REACTION TO THE

AYAHUASCA ITSELF.

IT WOULD BE NICE IF IT WAS A

LITTLE STRONGER, AND I DON'T

MEAN TO BE COCKY IN SAYING THAT,

BECAUSE IT'S NOT FOR AMUSEMENT

OR ENTERTAINMENT.

BUT I'M READY TO KIND OF GO A

LITTLE DEEPER INTO MYSELF TO SEE

WHAT ELSE COMES OUT.

>> I THINK THE BIG DIFFERENCE

BETWEEN THE USE OF AYAHUASCA

TODAY AND THE USE OF OTHER

SUBSTANCES IN THE 1960s IS A

VERY STRONG UNDERSTANDING OF THE

IMPORTANCE OF RITUAL AND THE

CEREMONIAL ELEMENT IN FOSTERING

A THERAPEUTIC OR SPIRITUAL

EXPERIENCE.

IT'S NOT A PARTY DRUG IN THE WAY

THAT OTHER SUBSTANCES HAVE BEEN

USED.

THE WISDOM OF LEARNING THROUGH

PLANTS IS A CULTURAL TRADITION

THAT GOES BACK HUNDREDS, IF NOT

THOUSANDS, OF YEARS.

>> FOR ME, MY EXPERIENCE OF

BOTANICAL MEDICINE IS VERY

TECHNICAL AND MEDICAL AND

SCIENTIFIC, AND WE DO LEARN

ABOUT THE ENERGETICS OF PLANTS,

BUT IT'S MUCH MORE DOMINATED BY

THE SCIENCE, AND SO I'VE ALWAYS

REACHED OUT TO HAVE

OPPORTUNITIES TO INTEGRATE BOTH,

AND SO THAT'S MY GOAL.

>> YOU SEE THE HEALING ASPECT OF

THIS MEDICINE?

WHAT CAN YOU RELATE ABOUT IT?

>> IN TERMS OF AYAHUASCA, I NEED

TO DO IT MANY MORE TIMES --

MANY, MANY MORE TIMES TO BE ABLE

TO SPEAK TO THAT, BECAUSE I

CAN'T INTEGRATE THAT OR APPLY

THAT WITH OTHER PEOPLE UNTIL

I'VE INTEGRATED IT WITH ME.

I JUST CAN'T.

>> AT A CEREMONY 15 YEARS AGO,

FRANCOIS USED AYAHUASCA TO HELP

KICK AN ADDICTION TO HEROIN.

>> [ CHANTING ]

>> ADDICTION COMES FROM A SENSE

OF DEFICIENT EMPTINESS, AND

TRYING TO COMPLETE YOURSELF FROM

THE OUTSIDE IS THE ESSENCE OF

ADDICTION.

WITH AYAHUASCA, ONE HAS AN

OPPORTUNITY TO EXPERIENCE

ONESELF AS WHOLE AND COMPLETE.

IF YOU CAN ACTUALLY GET THAT

YOU'RE WHOLE AND COMPLETE, WHAT

IS THERE TO BE FILLED FROM THE

OUTSIDE ANYMORE?

THERE'S JUST NO NEED FOR IT.

AYAHUASCA CAN HELP PEOPLE SEE

THAT IN TWO OR THREE CEREMONIES,

IF IT'S THE APPROPRIATE SHAMANIC

LEADER AND IF IT'S THE RIGHT

ENVIRONMENT.

WELL, THAT IS A POTENTIAL TO

HEAL ADDICTIONS.

>> AYAHUASCA IS USED FOR MANY

REASONS.

FOR A CURANDERO LIKE DAVE,

AYAHUASCA IS A TEACHER OF THE

HEALING POWERS OF PLANTS.

>> MY HOME.

JUST TAKE OFF YOUR SHOES BEFORE

YOU COME INTO MY HOME, PLEASE.

JUST JOKING.

[ CHUCKLES ]

AYAHUASCA'S, IN MANY WAYS, LIKE

THE KEY TO THE DOOR THAT ALLOWS

YOU INTO THE PLANT-TEACHER

WORLD.

AYAHUASCA ALLOWS YOU TO ACCESS

THE OTHER PLANT TEACHERS IN A

MORE PROFOUND WAY.

A PLANT TEACHER IS -- I MEAN,

THE BEST WAY TO LOOK AT IT IS

YOU LOOK AT A PLANT AS A BEING,

AS YOU WOULD A FRIEND.

EACH PLANT HAS A PERSONALITY, AS

EACH HUMAN DOES.

YOU TAKE ON THE TRAITS OF A

PLANT, YOU KNOW, AND PLANTS ARE

VERY SENSITIVE AND VERY

INTUITIVE, AND, YOU KNOW, IN

HEALING, YOU NEED TO BE VERY

SENSITIVE AND VERY INTUITIVE.

SO, WE TAKE THESE PLANTS, YEAH,

TO LEARN FROM THEM AND, IN A

WAY, TO BECOME THEM.

I CAME HERE WITH THE INTENTION

OF, YOU KNOW, GAINING MORE

STRENGTH IN MY WORK, SO I'M ON A

DIET NOW WITH A BUNCH OF

DIFFERENT PLANTS AND TREES TO

GIVE ME MORE STRENGTH AND MORE

PROTECTION.

YOU SMELL SO BEAUTIFUL.

IT'S A MIX OF 25, 30 DIFFERENT

PLANTS, AND I DRINK IT EVERY

DAY.

YOU KNOW, IT REALLY BREAKS DOWN

THE BODY AT THE BEGINNING TO

OPEN UP.

FEEL A LITTLE BIT -- YOUR BODY

FEELS A LITTLE BIT, YOU KNOW,

OUT OF BALANCE AND A LITTLE BIT

WEAK, BUT THE MOST IMPORTANT

THING IS I FEEL GOOD IN MY MIND.

>> [ CHANTING ]

>> AFTER A DAY OF REFLECTION,

ROB AND KIRSTIE RETURN FOR THEIR

SECOND CEREMONY.

>> [ CHANTING CONTINUES ]

>> AGAIN, IT WAS JUST WANTING TO

EXPERIENCE SO MUCH SO QUICKLY,

IT WAS PROBABLY OVERESTIMATING

MY LEVEL, WHAT AYAHUASCA WANTED

TO SHOW ME AT THAT TIME.

IN A WAY, I KIND OF WANTED TO

TAKE MORE, BUT IN A WAY, I

DIDN'T, AND YOU HAVE TO RESPECT

AYAHUASCA.

SHE WAS TELLING ME SOMETHING.

>> [ CHANTING ]

>> IT'S TOTALLY DIFFERENT FROM

THE NIGHT PRIOR.

I WAS RESTLESS AND SORT OF

AGITATED.

A PART OF AYAHUASCA IS THE

PURGING ASPECT.

I, YOU KNOW, SORT OF HAD ALWAYS

JUST THOUGHT THAT MEANT

VOMITING, BUT IT JUST CAN BE A

LOT OF DIFFERENT BODILY THINGS

GOING ON AND NOISES AND

BELCHING, AND, LIKE, IT WAS

UNBELIEVABLE.

I GOT CAGEY, KIND OF, AND I

TRIED TO LEAVE THE ROOM

ENTIRELY, ACTUALLY, AT ONE

POINT, BUT I SORT OF GOT STUCK

STANDING THERE.

IT WAS JUST -- IT WAS

FRUSTRATING, KIND OF.

WHEN I DID GO OUTSIDE, I FOUND

ROB.

OH, MY GOD.

WE SAW THE SKY, AND IT WAS JUST

STAGGERING.

IT WAS JUST ASTONISHING HOW

BEAUTIFUL IT WAS, AND I SAW A

HUGE SHOOTING STAR, WHICH BLEW

MY MIND.

>> AND THEN WE LEFT, AND WHEN I

CAME BACK TO MY CABIN, I KIND OF

LAID DOWN AND I CLOSED MY EYES.

AND, LIKE, A LOT OF TIMES WHEN

YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES, YOU SEE

SOME LIGHT IMAGERY, AND THEN IT

BEGAN TO SWIRL TOGETHER, AND IT

CREATED THIS LITTLE EDDY RIGHT

IN FRONT OF MY FIELD OF VISION,

AND THEN, BIT BY BIT, LITTLE

IMAGES WOULD APPEAR OUT OF THIS

EDDY, COME OUT, AND GO BACK IN,

COME OUT, AND GO BACK IN.

WHEN I WAS READY TO WRITE OFF

THE EVENING AS SOMEWHAT OF A

REJECTION OR A NEGATIVE, SHE

PULLED ME RIGHT BACK AND THEN

PUT ME ASLEEP.

>> IT'S REALLY A THERAPY.

YOU HAVE ONE CEREMONY, IT'S LIKE

GOING TO PSYCHOTHERAPY FOR TWO

YEARS.

>> COLIN, FROM VANCOUVER,

ATTENDED AYAHUASCA CEREMONIES

FOR A YEAR BEFORE COMING TO

PERU.

HE'S HOPING TO HEAL A TROUBLED

MARRIAGE.

>> FOR ME, I JUST WANT TO BE THE

FATHER THAT I KNOW I CAN BE AND

THE HUSBAND I CAN BE AND SUPPORT

MY WIFE, AS THE FAMILY COMES

FIRST, RIGHT?

>> WE HAD BEEN ON AND OFF AND

ARE CONTINUING IN KIND OF A

POWER-STRUGGLE STAGE.

WE HAVE DONE COUPLES' THERAPY

COUNSELING, BUT IT DOESN'T

QUITE -- I MEAN, IT WORKS FOR A

LITTLE BIT, BUT THERE'S A DEEPER

ISSUE.

>> WHEN I CAME HERE, I KNEW I

WANTED TO GO A LITTLE DEEPER.

FOR ME, THE ONE WORD THAT CAME

UP WAS "ACCEPTANCE" --

ACCEPTANCE OF MYSELF, ACCEPTANCE

OF MY PAST, AND ACCEPTANCE OF MY

WIFE, WHO IS PROBABLY THE

NUMBER-ONE THING.

TO HER, THAT WAS THE BIG

BLOCKAGE IN OUR RELATIONSHIP.

>> THERE IS SOMETHING THAT'S

OBVIOUSLY KEEPING US TOGETHER,

BUT THERE IS SOME KIND OF --

SOMETHING WE KEEP COMING UP

AGAINST.

>> I REALIZE THAT I'VE HAD THIS

SENSE OF SADNESS WITHIN ME

AFFECTING MULTIPLE THINGS FROM

PAST RELATIONSHIPS, PEOPLE THAT

HAVE PASSED IN MY LIFE, TO

SADNESS AROUND THINGS AROUND MY

CHILDHOOD AND BEING UNHAPPY WITH

MY SORT OF PLACE IN THE WORLD,

SO I'M SAD ABOUT IT AT TIMES.

>> AFTER EACH CEREMONY,

GUILLERMO ENCOURAGES

PARTICIPANTS TO TALK ABOUT THEIR

EXPERIENCES.

>> I FEEL MYSELF ATTACHED WITH A

BIT OF A DARK SPIRIT, WHICH CAME

TO ME LAST NIGHT, AND IT'S ALL

LINKED TO AN EX-GIRLFRIEND WHO

HAS DIED.

SHE'S SINCE DIED, BUT SHE

STILL -- THERE WAS LOTS OF LOVE

THERE.

THERE WAS A LOT OF LIGHTNESS,

BUT HER DARK SIDE IS SORT OF

STILL HANGING ON TO ME.

SHE WAS A VERY MANIPULATIVE

WOMAN, AND THE FIRST WOMAN IN MY

LIFE.

IT'S VERY CLEAR.

GRACIAS.

>> DAVID.

>> I WOKE UP THIS MORNING, YOU

KNOW, VERY EARLY AND STILL VERY

HIGH WITH THE AYAHUASCA AND HAD

SOME NIGHTMARES, A LOT OF

SWEATING DURING THE NIGHT,

ALMOST LIKE MY BODY'S TRYING TO

MOVE IT THROUGH.

>> PROFESSIONALLY, IN TERMS OF

WORK OF A NATUROPATHIC DOCTOR, I

SORT OF FEEL CONFUSED.

TO EMPLOY THIS MEDICINE, EVEN IN

A LIMITED CAPACITY, PROBABLY

TAKES A LOT OF PERSONAL

JOURNEYING, PERIOD, FOR ME.

WHOO-HOO!

I NEED TO TALK IT THROUGH WITH

DAVE -- HOW HE OPERATES, BECAUSE

THE CEREMONY IS CRUCIAL AND THE

TRAINING IS CRUCIAL.

>> AYAHUASCA.

IN POWDER.

[ SPEAKS SPANISH ]

IT'S IMPORTANT FOR PEOPLE TO

KNOW THAT THE AYAHUASCA ACTS AS

A TEACHER AND IT ALLOWS YOU TO

DISCOVER YOURSELF THROUGH YOUR

OWN KNOWLEDGE, THROUGH YOUR OWN

EXPERIENCE.

THESE ARE ALL THE PLANTS WE USE

FOR BATHING HERE.

A LOT OF THEM ATTRACT LOVE AND

GOOD LUCK.

>> OH, YEAH.

>> AND ALL THESE MEDICINES UP

HERE ARE ALL FOR MEN TO GET A

LITTLE EXTRA ENERGY.

>> OH.

>> YEAH.

MEANS SEVEN TIMES.

>> SEVEN TIMES.

>> SEVEN TIMES PER NIGHT.

[ CHUCKLES ]

>> THE OTHER THING THAT DAVE

SAYS WAS THAT AYAHUASCA IS GONNA

MEET YOU WHERE YOU'RE AT IN

TERMS OF WHAT NEEDS TO HAPPEN

AND THE POTENTIAL TO GO VERY

DEEP INTO YOUR OWN FEARS AND

CHALLENGES AND PERSONAL GROWTH.

I THINK NEXT TIME, I'M READY TO

GO.

EVEN IF IT'S CHALLENGING, I'M

READY TO SORT OF HAVE A BIT MORE

AND GO DEEPER AND JUST FACE WHAT

I FIND.

>> WHAT KIRSTIE AND ROB WILL

FACE ON THIS, THEIR THIRD

CEREMONY, IS UNKNOWN AND

UNKNOWABLE.

>> THE MYSTERIUM TREMENDUM IS,

AS YOU CAN TELL FROM THE TERM, A

TREMENDOUS MYSTERY.

IT IS AT THE CORE OF ALL TRUE

RELIGIOUS OR MYSTICAL

EXPERIENCE -- THE FEELING OF

BEING AT ONE WITH THE UNIVERSE.

AND YET IT'S THE EXPERIENCE THAT

MOST RELIGIONS ARE FRANTIC TO

DENY.

IT'S NOT FOR THE ORDINARY

PERSON.

IT'S SOMETHING, YOU KNOW, THE

INTERPRETATION HAS TO COME

THROUGH THE CHURCH, THROUGH THE

PRIESTHOOD, THROUGH THE

HIERARCHY OR WHATEVER, "AND

WE'LL TELL YOU WHAT THIS MEANS."

AND I THINK THAT'S ONE OF THE

INTERESTING THINGS ABOUT

AYAHUASCA.

IT GIVES YOU A TOOL TO ACTUALLY

APPROACH THIS PHENOMENON

EXPERIMENTALLY.

AND SOME PEOPLE WAIT ALL THEIR

LIVES AND SPEND YEARS IN

MEDITATION AND ALL SORTS OF

AESTHETIC EXPERIENCES AND NEVER

HAVE A MYSTICAL EXPERIENCE.

YOU CAN BE JUST A KIND OF AN

ORDINARY SCHMUCK, AND UNDER THE

RIGHT CIRCUMSTANCES,

PSYCHEDELICS CAN TRIGGER THIS

KIND OF EXPERIENCE.

>> JUST EXPERIENCING EVERYTHING

POSSIBLE THAT'S IN LIFE AT ANY

GIVEN MOMENT, AND YOU'RE JUST

TAKING IT ALL IN WITHOUT TRYING

TO STATE HOW YOU FEEL.

JUST LET IT BE AND LISTEN TO

EVERYTHING COME IN.

AND IT JUST, YOU KNOW, AWES YOUR

INNER SILENCE.

LAST NIGHT WAS JUST THE

CULMINATION OF FINALLY BEING AT

HOME DOWN HERE.

GOOD MEDICINE AND JUST LISTENING

TO GUILLERMO AND EVERYONE CHANT.

IT WAS EVERYTHING THAT IT COULD

POSSIBLY BE, I THINK.

IT WAS JUST PERFECT.

MY STRONGEST VISIONS AT THE VERY

BEGINNING WERE LIKE A

MULTI-LEVEL DIMENSION, AND

THERE'S, LIKE, A DOOR BEING

OPENED TO THIS, BUT IT'S

CONSTANTLY BEING OPENED.

IT'S CONSTANTLY BEING OPENED.

AND IT NEVER GOES AWAY, 'CAUSE

IT'S NEW AGAIN, AND SO IT'S

NATURE JUST SHOWING YOU.

AT TIMES, I FEEL LIKE SHE COULD

ACTUALLY CONTROL MY HEAD AND

TILT IT DIFFERENT WAYS AND LOOK

AROUND, AND SO I WOULD LOOK...

AT GUILLERMO, AND IT'S JUST...

[ SIGHS ]

I DON'T KNOW HOW.

[ CHUCKLES ]

BUT IT WAS SO NICE, AND IT WAS

MATERNAL, EVEN WHEN LOOKING AT

GUILLERMO.

SUDDENLY, I WASN'T A YOUNGER

PERSON THAN GUILLERMO, I WAS

OLDER, LOOKING AT HIM LIKE HE

WAS A CHILD, AND YOU ARE SO

PROUD OF THIS CHILD.

"LOOK AT WHAT HE'S DOING."

SHE WAS SAYING THAT AS SHE

LOOKED AT GUILLERMO.

"LOOK AT ALL HE CAN DO."

AND THERE WAS JUST A SENSE OF

AWE AND RENEWED INNOCENCE ALL

THE TIME, BUT THAT'S PARTLY FROM

HER END.

IT'S THE MOST SPIRITUAL THING

I'VE EVER FELT IN MY WHOLE LIFE.

WELL, I COULD TELL KIRSTIE

WASN'T QUITE HAVING AS GREAT A

TIME AS I WAS.

>> [ SIGHS ]

THE CEREMONY LAST NIGHT

WAS...EXCEPTIONALLY HARD,

LIKE...

I JUST COULDN'T GET A NICE,

PEACEFUL VISION OR EXPERIENCE.

THERE WERE JUST MOMENTS WHERE I

JUST COULDN'T EVEN...BEAR IT.

LIKE, IT WAS JUST UNBELIEVABLY

HARD.

I FELT A LOT OF DARK THINGS, AND

IT WAS -- THIS SOUNDS VERY

DRAMATIC, BUT [CHUCKLES]

IT WAS PRETTY DEMONIC.

LIKE, THERE WERE SOME PRETTY,

LIKE, TERRIFYING MOMENTS WHERE,

LIKE, I THOUGHT I WAS GONNA DIE.

I THOUGHT I WAS GONNA, LIKE,

SHUT DOWN AS A SELF-PROTECTION

MECHANISM, 'CAUSE I WAS WAY, WAY

BEYOND DEALING WITH IT.

>> [ CHANTING ]

>> AND THEN IT LITERALLY WAS

LIKE A MIRACLE, BECAUSE DAVE

APPEARED.

>> [ CHANTING ]

>> WHAT HAPPENS IN A STRONG

EXPERIENCE WITH AYAHUASCA LIKE

THAT IS THAT YOU LOSE CONTROL.

AN EGO IS ABOUT HAVING CONTROL.

YOU CAN'T CONTROL AYAHUASCA.

YOU KNOW, YOU CAN WORK WITH IT,

BUT IF YOU TRY TO CONTROL IT AND

GET INTO A POWER STRUGGLE WITH

AYAHUASCA, THAT'S WHERE SHE'S

GONNA COME ON STRONGER TO TRY TO

HAVE THAT EGOIC DEATH OR THE

SPIRITUAL DEATH.

[ CHANTING ]

>> THERE WERE EMOTIONAL SORT OF

COMPONENTS TO IT TO DO WITH MY

FAMILY.

PEOPLE WOULD COME TO ME --

DIFFERENT PEOPLE IN MY LIFE WHOM

I LOVE, WHICH COME TO ME AND TRY

TO COMMUNICATE TO ME, AND THEN

WOULD BE SUCKED AWAY.

AND I WOULD TRY TO COMMUNICATE

WITH THEM, AND THEN IT WOULD BE

SUCKED AWAY.

IT WAS TRULY, TRULY

INDESCRIBABLE -- THE HORROR.

>> [ CHANTING ]

>> I WAS SO TERRIFIED OF LOSING

HIM, LIKE, 'CAUSE HE WAS LIKE A

LIFELINE.

AND I WAS LIKE [PANTING]

"I WILL DRAG MYSELF.

I DON'T CARE WHAT IT TAKES."

AND HE HELPED ME GET OVER THERE,

AND THEN HE JUST DID CHANTING,

HE WAS DOING REIKI.

>> [ CHANTING CONTINUES ]

>> SHE'S LOST IN THIS, LIKE,

GREAT BIG, VAST SEA, SO I'M

THERE TO THROW HER A LINE, IN A

WAY, BECAUSE SHE WAS GETTING

DROWNED IN HER, YOU KNOW, HER

EXPERIENCE.

I'M THERE TO FIND HER PATH AND

FIND A WAY THAT SHE GOT THERE,

AND SO I, THROUGH THE CHANTING,

FIND HER AND THEN BRING HER BACK

IN HER BODY AND BACK WITH HER

CONNECTION, AND THEN THE HEALING

WILL START TO HAPPEN UNDER ITS

OWN PROCESS.

>> [ CHANTING CONTINUES ]

>> IF THAT ISN'T THE MOST

HUMBLING THING I HAVE EVER DONE.

I HOPE MY EGO JUST STAYS AWAY

AND LEAVES ME ALONE.

[ Voice breaking ] IT HAS TO

PISS OFF.

I DON'T WANT TO DO THAT.

I DON'T WANT TO DEAL WITH IT.

AND DAVE SAID, "OKAY, YOU'RE

GONNA GO TO GUILLERMO.

GO TO GUILLERMO."

AND I WAS LIKE, "CAN I CRAWL?"

SO, I DRAGGED MYSELF.

HE ADDRESSED MY ISSUES AT

MULTIPLE DIFFERENT LEVELS

THROUGH CHANTING.

>> [ CHANTING ]

[ BOTH CHANTING ]

>> OH, I WAS SO GRATEFUL,

BECAUSE THEY DIDN'T LET ME GO

UNTIL I WAS ABLE TO COPE.

LIKE, THEY PASSED ME DOWN THE

CHAIN, AND I JUST CRIED AND

CRIED BECAUSE I FELT THIS INSANE

LEVEL OF GRATITUDE.

LIKE, I DON'T EVEN HAVE WORDS

FOR IT.

I FELT THIS KIND OF LOVE I DON'T

THINK I'VE EVER FELT IN MY LIFE.

IT WAS NOT FROM HERE.

>> I WOULD TURN SLIGHTLY AND

JUST KIND OF LET HER KNOW I WAS

THERE.

[ CHUCKLES ]

BUT THAT'S ALL YOU CAN DO.

I MEAN, YOU CAN'T VERBALIZE THAT

SORT OF THING.

I LET HER KNOW THAT I WAS AWARE

OF WHAT SHE WAS GOING THROUGH.

>> BECAUSE WE REALLY SORT OF

BONDED, HE WAS QUITE CLOSE TO

ME.

SOMETIMES HIS BALD HEAD WAS,

LIKE, VOOM, VOOM.

SO, IF I DIDN'T KNOW HIM, I

WOULD'VE BEEN LIKE, "DUDE...GO

HAVE YOUR PARTY, LIKE, THREE

FEET TO THE SIDE.

LIKE, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"

BUT I WAS LIKE -- I WAS

COMFORTED BY ROB'S PRESENCE.

HE JUST WAS AWESOME.

HE WAS LIKE -- HE WAS THERE THE

WHOLE TIME.

WE WENT OUTSIDE AND IT WAS DAWN,

SO IT WAS THAT MAGIC TIME WHEN

EVERYTHING'S BLUE.

AND WE KIND OF TROTTED AROUND,

BECAUSE WE WERE JUST SORT OF

USED TO BEING TOGETHER.

I REALLY AM SO -- STILL SO

SLOW-MO.

SLOW-MOTION.

>> IT TAKES SO MUCH OUT OF YOU.

IT'S CRAZY.

>> OH, MY GOD.

I WAS SO GLAD, ROB, THAT YOU

WERE THERE.

THAT LITERALLY BROKE ME OPEN.

[ SIGHS ]

LIKE, THAT LITERALLY ANNIHILATED

ME.

I DON'T YET KNOW WHAT IT MEANS.

>> WHEN YOU THINK YOU'RE GONNA

DIE, THE PART OF THAT IS -- THE

PART OF THE HEALING IS THAT WHEN

YOU DO COME OUT OF THE

EXPERIENCE, YOU'RE JUST HAPPY TO

BE ALIVE, AND THAT'S THE WAY WE

NEED TO LIVE EVERY DAY OF OUR

LIFE.

PART OF THE ENJOYMENT OF LIVING

LIFE IS JUST BE GRATEFUL FOR

YOUR LIFE.

>> IS THERE A KEY INSIGHT THAT

YOU GET AFTER YOU'VE TAKEN LOTS

OF AYAHUASCA?

[ SIGHS ]

WELL, IT SOUNDS TRIVIAL, BUT THE

INSIGHT IS YOU DON'T KNOW SHIT.

WE KNOW VERY LITTLE ABOUT THE

WAY THE WORLD IS PUT TOGETHER,

ABOUT HOW THE UNIVERSE REALLY

IS, ABOUT OUR ROLE IN IT, AND

WHAT'S REALLY GOING ON, YOU

KNOW.

YOU MONKEYS ONLY THINK YOU'RE

RUNNING THE SHOW.

YOU KNOW, YOU DON'T.

AND NOT ONLY ARE YOU NOT RUNNING

THE SHOW, YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW

WHAT THE SHOW IS.

SO, BE HUMBLE.

REMEMBER THAT YOU DON'T KNOW

MUCH.

>> INTEGRATING THE INSIGHTS

LEARNED FROM AYAHUASCA CAN BE A

DIFFICULT TASK.

COLIN IS STILL WORKING TO HEAL

THE RELATIONSHIP WITH HIS WIFE,

NINA.

>> HI.

[ CHUCKLES ]

HI.

>> MY WIFE IS MY SOUL MATE, AND

I REALLY DO WANT TO SEE THAT

RELATIONSHIP REACH ITS FULL

POTENTIAL, AND IT CAN BE A ROCKY

ROAD.

YOU KNOW, IT'S GOT ITS UPS AND

DOWNS.

IT'S NOT ALL BLISS.

IT'S A PROCESS, AND YOU'VE BEEN

PART OF THAT PROCESS -- A BIG

PART OF THAT PROCESS.

BUT I FINALLY ACCEPTED THINGS ON

A LEVEL THAT...

[ SIGHS ]

[ CHUCKLES ]

>> [ CHUCKLES ]

>> I ACCEPTED THINGS ON A LEVEL

THAT PRODUCED HEALING.

>> WHAT HE GETS FROM CEREMONY IS

HE REALLY GETS IN TOUCH WITH

HIMSELF, OF A PLACE OF

ACCEPTANCE OF HIMSELF,

ACCEPTANCE OF ME, JUST LETTING

GO AND NOT NEEDING TO CONTROL.

AND THEN IT WILL LAST A MONTH,

AND THEN IT EXPLODES INTO NOT

BEING HAPPY AND UNHAPPY IN THIS

RELATIONSHIP AND COMPLETE

OPPOSITE.

I'M TRYING TO JUST BE ACCEPTING

OF IT, BUT IT'S HARD TO

COMPLETELY ACCEPT IT ALL, COLIN,

'CAUSE I'VE HEARD A LOT OF THE

SAME KIND OF STUFF BEFORE.

JUST GONNA TAKE SOME TIME TILL I

SEE SOME -- I ACTUALLY SEE IT AS

OPPOSED TO WORDS.

I THINK COLIN SOMETIMES FEELS

THAT HE JUST NEEDS TO LIVE

AYAHUASCA TO AYAHUASCA, CEREMONY

TO CEREMONY, BUT YOU CAN'T JUST

LIVE IN THAT WORLD.

YOUR WORLD IS FAMILY OR JOB,

WHATEVER IT MAY BE.

>> THE MOST IMPORTANT PART OF

AYAHUASCA IS THE ACTUAL

INTEGRATION INTO YOUR LIFE.

IF YOU'RE NOT INTEGRATING THAT,

THERE'S NO POINT TO ANY OF THESE

SPIRITUAL PATHS.

UNLESS WE'RE DOING THAT, WE'RE

WASTING OUR TIME.

>> IT WAS STAGGERING THE EXTENT

TO WHICH I NEEDED TO PROCESS

WHAT HAPPENED IN PERU.

IT WASN'T UNTIL HALFWAY THROUGH

IT THAT I REALIZED WITH

INCREDIBLE CERTAINTY, LIKE A

LIGHTNING BOLT, THAT I HAD

ALMOST MISSED THE POINT

ENTIRELY, WHICH WAS THAT I

WASN'T THERE FOR WORK.

I MEAN, THE TRUE PURPOSE, IN

TERMS OF WHY I WAS THERE, HAD

NOTHING TO DO WITH ANY OF THOSE

THINGS.

IT WAS ONLY FOR ME.

IT WAS REALLY HARD FOR ME TO

ARTICULATE WHAT HAD HAPPENED AND

HOW I FELT ABOUT IT.

I BECAME DEFENSIVE OF IT BECAUSE

I THINK THE GO-TO THOUGHT FOR

PEOPLE IS, "OH, YOU'RE GOING AND

GETTING HIGH -- PSYCHOTROPIC

PLANTS IN THE JUNGLE."

AND IT ALMOST IS A BIT OFFENSIVE

IF YOU HAVE ANY EXPERIENCE WITH

AYAHUASCA TO THINK OF IT THAT

WAY OR REFER TO IT IN THAT WAY,

SO I WOULD FIND IT FRUSTRATING

TO SORT OF TRY TO EXPLAIN IT TO

PEOPLE.

>> SO, WHAT DO YOU THINK THE

AYAHUASCA DID FOR YOU?

HOW DID IT CHANGE YOUR

PERCEPTION OF THE WORLD?

>> IT JUST MAKES YOU REALIZE

THAT YOU'RE PART OF A MUCH

LARGER WHOLE ALL THE TIME,

WHETHER IT'S NATURE OR THE OTHER

PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE.

>> YOU KNOW, I'M KIND OF

CONFLICTED, 'CAUSE IT SOUNDS

LIKE IT'S A SHORTCUT TO

MEDITATION OR TO SPIRITUAL

AWAKENING, AND I'M NOT SURE IF

THAT SHORTCUT, THEN, HAS THE

LONG-TERM EFFECTS THAT, SAY,

DISCIPLINE AND MEDITATION WOULD

HAVE, YOU KNOW?

>> I'D HAVE TO THINK ABOUT THAT

SOME MORE.

>> MM.

>> I LIVE ALONE.

[ CHUCKLES ]

EVERYTHING I DO IS SOLITARY, FOR

THE MOST PART.

WHEN I CAME BACK, IT WAS ON THE

TIP OF MY TONGUE THAT I SHOULD

BE IN CLOSER CONTACT WITH MY

FAMILY.

HEY.

HOW'S IT GOING?

>> EXCELLENT.

>> I MEAN, YOU CAN'T PRETEND TO

UNDERSTAND THE BOSOM OF

AYAHUASCA CRADLING YOU UNLESS

YOU REALIZE THAT YOU ALSO HAVE

FRIENDS AND FAMILY THAT MEAN A

GREAT DEAL TO YOU, AND YOU HAVE

TO TAKE THE LOVE THAT SHE SHOWS

YOU THERE AND SPREAD THAT AROUND

TO YOUR FAMILY AND FRIENDS.

HAVE A SAFE TRIP IN TOMORROW,

AND I'LL SEE YOU IN THE MORNING.

>> CHEERS.

WE'LL SEE YOU THERE.

>> TAKE CARE.

EVEN MY BROTHER -- I MEAN, WE'RE

CUT FROM THE SAME CLOTH.

WE'VE ALWAYS BEEN KIND OF

GUARDED, DISTANT PEOPLE, AND

JUST TO SEE HIM ALMOST GUSH THIS

MORNING, IT WAS JUST REALLY

NICE.

>> OVER THE WEEKS AND MONTHS

FOLLOWING, I REALIZED THAT I HAD

NEVER IN MY LIFE FELT VULNERABLE

THE WAY THAT I DID IN THAT

MOMENT BECAUSE I HAD NEVER

ALLOWED IT.

AND ULTIMATELY, WHAT I REALIZED

IS THAT TO REALLY RECEIVE LOVE,

YOU HAVE TO BE ABLE TO BE

VULNERABLE.

AYAHUASCA GAVE ME A DIFFERENT

WAY OF FEELING IN MY BODY, A

DIFFERENT WAY OF BEING, A

DIFFERENT WAY OF VIEWING MYSELF

IN THE WORLD.

THAT IT IS STAGGERING IN THAT IT

ALLOWS YOU TO SORT OF HAVE A

SECOND CHANCE AT BEING YOURSELF.

>> THERE'S BEEN A TREND, I

THINK, IN WESTERN MEDICINE TO

RECOGNIZE THAT ALTERNATIVE

HEALING PRACTICES CAN BE A

USEFUL ADJUNCT TO MODERN,

WESTERN APPROACHES.

SO I THINK AYAHUASCA CAN BE A

VALUABLE COMPONENT OF TREATING

SUCH THINGS AS PSYCHIATRIC

CONDITIONS, DEPRESSION, ANXIETY,

ADDICTIONS -- THINGS THAT MODERN

WESTERN MEDICINE, I THINK,

HASN'T REALLY DONE A GOOD JOB OF

ADDRESSING.

>> I DON'T HAVE A WHOLE LOT OF

OPTIMISM THAT WITHIN MY

LIFETIME, SOMETHING LIKE

AYAHUASCA WILL BE SAFELY

EMPLOYED.

IF IT RUNS COUNTER TO PEOPLE'S

INNATE PREJUDICES, IT'S NOT

INCORPORATED.

HERETICAL AS IT IS TO SAY IT IN

A MEDICAL CONTEXT, I DON'T NEED

DECADES OF RESEARCH TO TELL ME

THAT SOMETHING IS GOOD WHEN I

KNOW THAT IT IS.

>> HOW'S IT GOING, BRO?

[ CHUCKLES ]

NICE SEEING YOU AGAIN.

HOW YOU DOING?

YEAH, YEAH.

>> GOOD. GOOD.

>> THANK YOU.

GOOD TO SEE YOU.

THIS MEDICINE IS GIVING ME MY

LIFE -- MY LIFE PATH.

I'LL BE DOING THIS UNTIL I'M OLD

AND GRAY.

THAT'S NEVER BEEN A DOUBT IN MY

MIND.

IT'S ALWAYS BEEN WHETHER OR NOT

I COULD ACTUALLY ACCOMPLISH IT.

JUST THANK CREATOR FOR

NOURISHMENT AND NOURISH OUR

BODY, OUR SPIRIT, OUR MINDS.

HELP US BE STRONG AND WORK IN A

GOOD WAY WITH THE MEDICINE

TONIGHT.

IT'S GIVEN ME A WHOLE COMMUNITY

OF PEOPLE.

IT'S GIVEN ME DEAR FRIENDS.

IT'S GIVEN ME A PURPOSE.

IT'S GIVEN ME CONFIDENCE, YOU

KNOW, JUST TO BE ABLE TO

ACKNOWLEDGE THAT I CAN DO

SOMETHING, YOU KNOW, FOR PEOPLE

AND HELPING PEOPLE.

>> AT DAVE'S NORTHERN WILDERNESS

RETREAT, ROB AND KIRSTIE MEET

FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE THEIR

TRIP TO PERU.

>> I DIDN'T KNOW ROB BEFORE

THIS, BUT I NOW KNOW ROB IN

RATHER AN INTIMATE WAY.

[ SIGHS ]

>> IT WAS JUST LIKE SOME KIND OF

CRAZY, NATURAL WEDDING WHERE WE

JUST -- A UNION OF OUR SOULS,

AND SHE WAS A LITTLE ON THE

DOWNSIDE, I WAS A LITTLE ON THE

UP, BUT BY THE END OF THE

EVENING, WE WERE AT EXACTLY THE

SAME PLACE.

>> SO, WE'RE ALL GONNA BE

DRINKING AYAHUASCA TONIGHT.

TRUST YOURSELF.

YOU'VE HEARD THE CALL, YOU FELT

THE CALL TO BE HERE.

SOME PEOPLE TALK ABOUT, YOU

KNOW, THE CHEMICAL.

IT'S NOT A CHEMICAL.

AYAHUASCA'S A SPIRIT.

[ BLOWING ]

SO, APPROACH AYAHUASCA WITH, YOU

KNOW, OBVIOUSLY, RESPECT, WITH

REVERENCE, AND ALSO WITH

GRATITUDE.

I'M ALWAYS CHECKING IN WITH MY

INTENTION.

WHAT IS MY INTENTION OF CARRYING

THIS WORK?

IT HAS TO BE TO SHARE, AND TO

HAVE THAT EXPERIENCE THAT YOU

CAN GET IN THE AMAZON WITH

TRADITIONAL HEALERS BUT HAVE IT

HERE.

[ CHANTING ]

WHEN WE DRINK AYAHUASCA OUTSIDE

OF THE AMAZON, WE'RE NOT

SURROUNDED BY THE PLANTS, SO

IT'S ALSO A DIFFERENT

EXPERIENCE, BUT YOU CAN STILL

TAKE THE SPIRIT OF THE PLANT

WITH YOU.

I HAVE THE SPIRIT OF THE PLANTS

INSIDE ME AND THE SPIRIT OF THE

JUNGLE, AND I TRY TO SHARE THAT

WITH THE PEOPLE.

>> DAVE AND OTHERS LIKE HIM ARE

SPREADING THE GOSPEL OF

AYAHUASCA THROUGH CEREMONIES

AROUND THE WORLD.

>> MY INTENTION IS TO HELP

PEOPLE IN THEIR HEALING -- THE

HEALING OF OUR COMMUNITIES HERE,

THE HEALING OF THE PLANET.

THIS IS WHY I THINK AYAHUASCA

HAS LEFT THE AMAZON.

>> WE'RE IMPACTING THE PLANET IN

CERTAIN AREAS LIKE THE AMAZON.

THAT'S A GOOD EXAMPLE WHERE

WE'RE BASICALLY RAPING THE

AMAZON, BUT MAYBE THIS IS

SENDING, YOU KNOW, WAVES OF

ALARM, IN SOME SENSE, THROUGH

THE REST OF THE BIOSPHERE.

AND IN NO SENSE AM I INVOKING

CONSCIOUSNESS HERE, BUT IT'S A

DEFENSIVE STRATEGY FOR

SELF-PRESERVATION ON THE PART

OF, NOT ONLY AYAHUASCA, BUT IN

SOME WAYS, ALMOST ON BEHALF OF

EVERYTHING THAT'S LIVING ON THE

PLANET.

MAYBE THIS IS THE LAST DESPERATE

PLOY OF GAIA TO SORT OF HIT US

UPSIDE THE HEAD AND SAY, YOU

KNOW, "WAKE UP, YOU MONKEYS.

YOU'RE REALLY SCREWING THINGS

UP."

>> I MEAN, IF AYAHUASCA WAS TO

BE DESCRIBED AS A RELIGION OR A

FAITH, IT'S ALL ABOUT THE EARTH

AND ALL OF THE BEINGS -- ALL OF

THE BEINGS IN IT...BUT IN AN

EXPERIENTIAL WAY.

IT'S ONE THING TO

INTELLECTUALIZE SOMETHING, AND

IT'S ANOTHER THING ENTIRELY TO

TOUCH IT AND TO EXPERIENCE...

OTHER BIGGER ENERGIES THAT ARE

INTELLIGENT.

>> IT'S VERY MUCH LIKE BEING

HELD TO THE BOSOM OF THE MOTHER

OF EVERYTHING.

>> AND IT'S VERY MUCH ABOUT

LOVE, PERIOD.

>> [ CHANTING ]