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1
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This is so beautiful.
2
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You know it, Gary.
3
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Look at her.
4
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Do you know what I would like to do?
5
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Shower with them.
6
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Then, bang! We hit the city, baby, dead on.
7
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For a little drinks, a little nightlife, a little dancing.
8
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Dancing.
9
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We throw a huge party, I mean, huge party.
10
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Everybody's invited, women everywhere.
11
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All these girls, they're all there.
12
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- Naked bodies everywhere. - Gary.
13
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- They all know my name. - Gary!
14
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- What? - Nobody likes us. Nobody.
15
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Why are you messing with the fantasy?
16
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We know about the reality. Don't ruin the fantasy, OK?
17
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And then, we're hip, man. We're popular. We're revered.
18
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- Man... - We're studs.
19
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When the smoke clears, right,
20
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those two dames
21
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fall amazingly, completely and totally in love with us, Wyatt.
22
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Check it out.
23
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Yo! Check us out!
24
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Look, we're sorry about...
25
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♪She's alive
26
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- ♪She's alive! - ♪Weird science
27
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♪Weird!
28
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♪Weird science
29
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♪Plastic tubes and pots and pans
30
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♪Bits and pieces and magic From my hand
31
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♪We're making weird science
32
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♪Things I've never seen before Behind bolted doors
33
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♪Talent and imagination
34
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♪My creation
35
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♪Is it real?
36
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♪It's my creation
37
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♪I do not know
38
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♪No hesitation, No heart of gold
39
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♪Just flesh and blood
40
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♪I do not know, I do not know
41
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♪From my heart and from my hand
42
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♪Why don't people understand My intentions?
43
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♪Ooh, weird science
44
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♪Ooh! Ooh!
45
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♪Weird science
46
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- ♪Weird science - ♪Bits and pieces and bits and pieces
47
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- ♪And bits and pieces - ♪Science... ♪
48 00:03:42,431 --> 00:03:45,174 'Down. Down, you fool.'
48
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You know, this isn't very scary, Gary.
49
00:03:57,941 --> 00:04:01,025
"I Spit On Your Grave" is scary. This is, um...
50
00:04:01,653 --> 00:04:03,986
It's very mild. It's timid, you know.
51
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The old stuff is more funny than scary.
52
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I believe the word is "camp". It's campy.
53
00:04:11,704 --> 00:04:14,242
'The moon's rising. We've no time to lose.'
54
00:04:14,374 --> 00:04:16,957
You ever see "Dawn of the Dead"? "Dawn of the Dead" scared me.
55
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It really scared me. I slept with my parents for a week, OK?
56
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I had to call my grandmother in the night
57
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to discuss my childhood with her for three hours.
58
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I was really petrified.
59
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'He's just resting, waiting for a new life to come.'
60
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That would've been so much cooler if Dr. Frankenstein had made a girl.
61
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Don't burn the butter, alright? Ticks me off.
62
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I mean... I personally would've made a girl, you know.
63
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They did make a girl, "The Bride of Frankenstein".
64
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- I think it was released in '35. - It was '34, alright?
65
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She was a scag, Wyatt, she had, like, electric hair.
66
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If they made her beautiful, she wouldn't go out with the monster.
67
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That's a good point.
68
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'...his insane ambition to create life.'
69
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- Where'd your parents go, anyway? - Cincinnati.
70
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They're meeting the guy that my sister wants to marry.
71
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Chloe? Who the hell would marry Chloe?
72
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He's studying to be a vet.
73
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Try not to make a mess in there, Gary. The maid doesn't come till Monday.
74
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I don't understand something, Wyatt.
75
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How come your parents trust you? They never let you do shit before.
76
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Chet's coming home from college for the weekend. They trust him.
77
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He's in charge.
78
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Chet? Oh, shit!
79
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I can't believe this, Wyatt.
80
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I really wish that you told me this before I agreed to sleep over.
81
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You know how I feel about Chet. How do you put up with that guy?
82
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If I don't, he beats the shit out of me.
83
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It's a habit he picked up in military school.
84
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How do you put up with that putz?
85
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What can I say? He's very protective of me.
86
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Nice relationship.
87
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'...there you have his mad dream.
88
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'Look! There's nothing to fear.
89
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'Look... no blood, no decay, just a few stitches.
90
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'Go on. Fix the electrodes.
91
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'You'll have plenty to be afraid of before the night's over.
92
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'The storm will be magnificent.
93
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'All the electrical secrets of heaven.
94
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'And this time we're ready. Hey, Fritz?
95
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'Let's have one final test. Throw the switches.'
96
00:06:56,911 --> 00:07:00,655
'Here in this machine, I have discovered the great ray
97
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'that first brought life into the world.
98
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'And, look, here's the final touch.
99
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'The brain you stole, Fritz. Think of it.
100
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'The brain of a dead man waiting to live again
101
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'in a body I made with my own hands...'
102
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- You know, that's not a bad idea. - What?
103
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'In 15 minutes, the storm should be at its height...'
104
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Making a girl.
105
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Actually making a girl.
106
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Just like Frankenstein.
107
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Except cuter.
108
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- You're serious. - Yes.
109
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Look me in the eyes.
110
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Do I look serious?
111
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- 'You're crazy!' - 'Crazy, am I?
112
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'We'll see whether I'm crazy or not.'
113
00:08:00,683 --> 00:08:03,972
Gary Wallace, that's absolutely gross. That's sick.
114
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I'm not digging up dead girls. It's...
115
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No, I'm not talking about digging up a dead girl, Wyatt.
116
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I'm talking about your system, idiot. Your computer.
117
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OK, you know how you're always talking how you can simulate all that stuff
118
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on your computer, you know?
119
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What's the difference? Why can't we simulate a girl?
120
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I don't know. I guess I could, but why?
121
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It's two-dimensional on the screen. It's not flesh and blood, Gary.
122
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I know that, but we can use it, Wyatt. We can ask it questions.
123
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We can put it in real-life sexual situations and see how it reacts.
124
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Like real sick, demented shit. You'd love it.
125
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Well, what about your girl in, um... Canada?
126
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She lives in Canada. This girl has no morals. I don't like that in a girl.
127
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It's rough having those kind of relationships. You'll see.
128
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Anyway, get to work.
129
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Very nice.
130
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I'm telling you, Wyatt. If there's one thing I know, it's female stats.
131
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Anything bigger than a handful, you're risking a sprained tongue.
132
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You know, and...
133
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- Yeah. - Yeah.
134
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- Perfect. - OK. Now what?
135
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Should we give her a brain?
136
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- Yeah. We can play chess with her. - Chess?
137
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Just give her a brain, OK?
138
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OK, that's about all we can do with my stuff.
139
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I can't believe this shit. I can't believe this.
140
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Did you get a free toaster with this, too?
141
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Gary, it's smarter than you, OK?
142
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- The problem is, it's a lame idea, OK? - It's not a lame idea.
143
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The problem is your computer's a wimp and we need a lot more power than this.
144
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What do you suggest?
145
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'We have code penetration, we have program entry.
146
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'I repeat, we have code penetration, we have program entry.
147
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'Activate LAN trace.'
148
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We're in.
149
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We're in trouble, Gary.
150
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This is highly illegal.
151
00:11:01,405 --> 00:11:04,318
Well, you need more input. We got to fill this thing up with data.
152
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We gotta make her as real as possible, Wyatt.
153
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I want her to live, I want her to breathe.
154
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I want her to aerobicize.
155
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'It's live! All Dave, all night!
156
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'We know what you need. Only right here on Dave TV!'
157
00:11:58,004 --> 00:12:00,747
Look at this. It's moving, it's working. It's doing itself.
158
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It's working by itself.
159
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Gary?
160
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By the way, why are we wearing bras on our heads?
161
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Ceremonial.
162
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- You ready? - Yeah. Let's go.
163
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- Turn it off! - It is off!
164
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Hang up the phone!
165
00:13:06,197 --> 00:13:08,610
- Wyatt, what's going on? - I don't know!
166
00:13:08,741 --> 00:13:10,983
- Well, unplug it! - OK!
167
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Oh, shit!
168
00:13:29,387 --> 00:13:31,754
No! It was a birthday present!
169
00:13:36,060 --> 00:13:37,596
Oh, shit!
170
00:13:39,563 --> 00:13:41,054
- Oh, my God! - Oh, my God!
171
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Oh, shit! We got to get this thing out of your house!
172
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You get it out! It was your idea!
173
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This is all your fault, you son of a bitch!
174
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Hit the lights out! You get it out!
175
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I'll get it out!
176
00:14:14,974 --> 00:14:17,261
- Whoa! - Aargh!
177
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Ah, shit!
178
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One, two, three.
179
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'She's alive. Alive!'
180
00:15:05,357 --> 00:15:10,443
So... what would you little maniacs like to do first?
181
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You guys created me. I didn't come from anywhere.
182
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Before you started messing around with your computer, I didn't even exist.
183
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By the way... you did an excellent job. Thank you.
184
00:15:35,721 --> 00:15:37,132
Hello?
185
00:15:40,601 --> 00:15:42,593
Showering's real fun, isn't it?
186
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If we're going to have any kind of fun together,
187
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you guys had better loosen up.
188
00:16:01,705 --> 00:16:04,573
What are we going to do with her?
189
00:16:04,708 --> 00:16:08,372
Look... we'll just go with the situation, OK?
190
00:16:08,504 --> 00:16:10,336
I'm sure by Sunday, you'll think of something.
191
00:16:10,464 --> 00:16:12,956
You're a very bright guy. I have a lot of faith in you, OK?
192
00:16:13,092 --> 00:16:15,960
- Alright? - I'm just being practical.
193
00:16:16,095 --> 00:16:18,462
Well, I know you are, OK? And I appreciate it.
194
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Let's go.
195
00:16:20,766 --> 00:16:22,632
What are we going to do about this mess?
196
00:16:22,768 --> 00:16:25,556
Wyatt, you'll have plenty of time to clean up tomorrow, OK?
197
00:16:25,688 --> 00:16:29,272
OK, but don't get any B.O. on Chet's suit, or he'll kill me.
198
00:16:32,528 --> 00:16:34,269
- Where are we going, anyway? - I dunno.
199
00:16:34,405 --> 00:16:37,944
She said we're going to go downtown... Oh, my God! Whose stuff is this?
200
00:16:38,075 --> 00:16:40,136
- Is that your suit? Wait, is this yours? - Oh, shit.
201
00:16:40,160 --> 00:16:43,494
Holy shit! Wyatt, what's going on here?
202
00:16:43,622 --> 00:16:45,600
- Gary, I don't know! - I don't know what's going on here!
203
00:16:45,624 --> 00:16:46,990
You look good, though, alright?
204
00:16:47,126 --> 00:16:48,458
- Yeah? - Yeah.
205
00:16:55,092 --> 00:16:58,676
- So, did you steal this car? - No, I didn't steal the car.
206
00:16:58,804 --> 00:17:01,262
How'd you get it?
207
00:17:01,390 --> 00:17:03,757
I can get anything I want.
208
00:17:03,892 --> 00:17:07,056
- And right now, I want to party. - Party?
209
00:17:07,187 --> 00:17:10,726
Yeah, and you better think up a name for me, too.
210
00:17:10,858 --> 00:17:12,690
What name do you want?
211
00:17:12,818 --> 00:17:15,902
You guys created me, you think of a name for me.
212
00:17:16,030 --> 00:17:17,521
How about Lisa?
213
00:17:17,656 --> 00:17:19,067
Why Lisa?
214
00:17:20,576 --> 00:17:22,192
Why not?
215
00:17:22,328 --> 00:17:26,914
- He used to like a girl named Lisa. - Oh, yeah? Old girlfriend?
216
00:17:27,041 --> 00:17:28,828
She kicked him in the nuts.
217
00:17:30,336 --> 00:17:32,248
Will you shut up?
218
00:17:32,379 --> 00:17:35,463
Look, Gary, it wasn't your fault. All you said was hello to her.
219
00:17:35,591 --> 00:17:37,628
Yeah, look, Wyatt, shut up!
220
00:17:38,761 --> 00:17:42,721
Hey, guys, I like Lisa. That'll do just fine.
221
00:17:45,726 --> 00:17:47,888
OK, you guys ready to rock?
222
00:17:48,020 --> 00:17:49,682
- Ready. - Ready.
223
00:18:14,546 --> 00:18:16,708
- Lisa? - Yeah?
224
00:18:18,050 --> 00:18:22,545
- I don't think we belong here. - Don't be silly. It's a public place.
225
00:18:26,392 --> 00:18:30,386
Look, I'm sure we'd both love to stay, but we're not 21, so I think...
226
00:18:30,521 --> 00:18:33,605
You're 21. You're 21.
227
00:18:37,027 --> 00:18:40,361
Well, maybe you'd feel better if you just got out there and mingled.
228
00:18:40,489 --> 00:18:42,606
We don't mingle, OK?
229
00:18:43,492 --> 00:18:46,485
Well, maybe you'd be comfortable if I invited all these people
230
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back to your house and we could all mingle there.
231
00:18:51,125 --> 00:18:52,957
- We'll mingle. - We'll mingle.
232
00:18:57,673 --> 00:18:59,130
Hi, dudes.
233
00:19:10,936 --> 00:19:12,677
Well, goddamn!
234
00:19:15,149 --> 00:19:17,186
Listening to this blues music reminds me
235
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of my own trials and tribulations as a young guy and, uh...
236
00:19:20,404 --> 00:19:24,648
You know, my folks, they really, really dump on me. They really do.
237
00:19:26,118 --> 00:19:28,075
So, you guys get along with your parents?
238
00:19:31,457 --> 00:19:34,746
I guess you guys moved out by now though, huh?
239
00:19:37,713 --> 00:19:40,251
- Uh, what's this, sir? - Drink it.
240
00:19:43,135 --> 00:19:44,967
Uh...
241
00:19:45,095 --> 00:19:48,588
That's a very sweet thought of both you gentlemen, but I really don't...
242
00:19:51,643 --> 00:19:53,054
Until now.
243
00:19:57,983 --> 00:19:59,895
See you guys in the emergency room, huh?
244
00:20:00,027 --> 00:20:03,395
Hello, pretty lady. Tell me something.
245
00:20:03,530 --> 00:20:07,240
What's a beautiful broad like you doing with a malaka like this, huh?
246
00:20:07,367 --> 00:20:10,531
It's purely sexual.
247
00:20:10,662 --> 00:20:12,119
No shit.
248
00:20:12,831 --> 00:20:14,663
She's into malakas, Dino.
249
00:20:18,670 --> 00:20:21,504
She's into malakas! Do you believe that?
250
00:20:27,763 --> 00:20:29,470
You can say that again!
251
00:20:46,949 --> 00:20:51,319
Fats, man... let me tell you my story, man.
252
00:20:51,995 --> 00:20:56,990
Last year, I was insane for this crazy little 8th-grade bitch.
253
00:20:57,125 --> 00:20:58,616
- OK? - Crazy insane?
254
00:20:58,752 --> 00:21:00,334
- Insane? - Crazy?
255
00:21:00,462 --> 00:21:02,704
I was nuts for the woman, man.
256
00:21:02,840 --> 00:21:05,924
Now you gotta believe me, I'm telling the truth here.
257
00:21:06,051 --> 00:21:10,341
I'm speaking to you. I mean, I was nuts for the girl.
258
00:21:10,472 --> 00:21:13,055
And what did it to me was these big titties she had.
259
00:21:13,183 --> 00:21:15,425
For a 13-year-old girl, man!
260
00:21:15,561 --> 00:21:18,498
She wouldn't have had to worry about no titties for the rest of her life, boy.
261
00:21:18,522 --> 00:21:21,230
You know, she was set and she was looking good.
262
00:21:21,358 --> 00:21:22,849
That's the truth, baby.
263
00:21:22,985 --> 00:21:25,102
I called her every night for, like, a month.
264
00:21:25,237 --> 00:21:27,149
I mean, I'm talking devotion, man.
265
00:21:27,281 --> 00:21:29,273
Every damn night?
266
00:21:29,408 --> 00:21:31,168
Every night, Mitch. I ain't playing with you.
267
00:21:31,285 --> 00:21:33,117
On the telephone?
268
00:21:34,788 --> 00:21:37,246
What's this boy talking about, on the telephone, man?
269
00:21:37,374 --> 00:21:39,331
Explain it to him.
270
00:21:39,459 --> 00:21:41,325
Goddamn. We know there's a telephone, boy!
271
00:21:41,461 --> 00:21:44,670
- What the hell he think I'm doing? - But he hung up on her.
272
00:21:44,798 --> 00:21:47,757
Oh, you didn't hang up on her? The chick with those big, big titties?
273
00:21:47,885 --> 00:21:51,629
I hung up on the bitch. Now here's the capper.
274
00:21:51,763 --> 00:21:54,130
- You know what the bitch did to me? - Lay it on me.
275
00:21:54,266 --> 00:21:56,679
Check this shit out. Listen to what she did to me. She...
276
00:21:56,810 --> 00:22:00,599
She kneed you in the nuts and called him faggot in front of everybody.
277
00:22:00,731 --> 00:22:02,814
- She did what? - Bitch kneed your nuts?
278
00:22:02,941 --> 00:22:04,148
Bitch kneed my nuts!
279
00:22:04,276 --> 00:22:06,563
Bitch. I'm not playing with you. I ain't teasing, man.
280
00:22:06,695 --> 00:22:09,529
- In the family jewels? - In the family jewels, man.
281
00:22:09,656 --> 00:22:12,444
- Worst pain there is. - Broke my heart in two.
282
00:22:12,576 --> 00:22:16,616
- She broke more than your heart. - You're right there, baby.
283
00:22:16,747 --> 00:22:18,613
You can forget that other one.
284
00:22:18,749 --> 00:22:20,991
You got this fine jewel sitting right over here by you.
285
00:22:21,126 --> 00:22:23,914
- Yeah. - Ain't that the truth, baby?
286
00:22:24,046 --> 00:22:27,414
- That's the plain truth... - Uh-oh, there he goes!
287
00:22:30,802 --> 00:22:34,136
- Party's over. - Party's over, said the girl.
288
00:22:34,264 --> 00:22:37,803
I'm gonna get out of here. I got money for you right here. $50 for you.
289
00:22:42,314 --> 00:22:45,557
- I got $500 that boy won't make it. - I bet he's gonna make it.
290
00:22:45,692 --> 00:22:50,483
♪Ooh, baby, Baby, you know I love you
291
00:22:55,118 --> 00:22:58,156
You know, I really shouldn't be driving.
292
00:22:58,288 --> 00:23:01,998
Hey, listen, I appreciate it. You know, I really just don't feel like driving.
293
00:23:03,251 --> 00:23:06,289
OK, forget it. I'll drive. Give me the keys!
294
00:23:06,421 --> 00:23:08,413
Give me the keys!
295
00:23:08,548 --> 00:23:10,631
Is he going to be all right?
296
00:23:10,759 --> 00:23:13,627
I don't know. I warned him about that Blind Dog bourbon.
297
00:23:13,762 --> 00:23:16,880
Hey, he don't even have his license, Lisa.
298
00:23:17,015 --> 00:23:19,758
He's not lying. I don't even have a learner's permit.
299
00:23:19,893 --> 00:23:22,351
Hey, let's scout another party, man.
300
00:23:23,313 --> 00:23:25,726
What are you gonna tell Chet about me?
301
00:23:25,857 --> 00:23:27,439
Nothing.
302
00:23:27,567 --> 00:23:29,183
Nothing?
303
00:23:29,319 --> 00:23:31,402
That's not very realistic, Wyatt.
304
00:23:31,530 --> 00:23:35,365
Look, I don't know. I'm just trying to concentrate on the road.
305
00:23:35,492 --> 00:23:39,406
You better concentrate a little harder. You're about to run a red light.
306
00:23:40,122 --> 00:23:41,454
Oh, shit!
307
00:23:50,382 --> 00:23:52,669
I hate that boy! I always hated that shit!
308
00:23:52,801 --> 00:23:56,044
I never listen to him! I hate this car! I hate it!
309
00:23:56,179 --> 00:23:57,590
Are you OK?
310
00:23:59,474 --> 00:24:03,263
Well, my nuts are halfway up my ass, but other than that, I'm perfect!
311
00:24:04,146 --> 00:24:06,763
You better think of what you're going to do about Chet.
312
00:24:06,898 --> 00:24:09,185
He's one serious idiot.
313
00:24:09,317 --> 00:24:11,604
You're stewed, butt wad!
314
00:24:13,071 --> 00:24:14,437
Who, me?
315
00:24:14,573 --> 00:24:16,439
Know what time it is?
316
00:24:16,575 --> 00:24:18,817
Um... 2:00?
317
00:24:18,952 --> 00:24:21,160
Time to pay the fiddler.
318
00:24:27,627 --> 00:24:31,587
Um... I was kind of counting on you to be human about this.
319
00:24:37,929 --> 00:24:40,137
Here's the bottom line, Wyatt.
320
00:24:41,224 --> 00:24:43,682
I'm telling Mom and Dad everything.
321
00:24:44,686 --> 00:24:47,770
I'm even considering making up some shit.
322
00:24:49,524 --> 00:24:51,356
Alright, Chet, name your price.
323
00:24:53,236 --> 00:24:56,400
$175 and zero cents, cash.
324
00:24:56,531 --> 00:25:00,946
New bills, crisp and clean, in my wallet by 7:00 a.m.
325
00:25:02,287 --> 00:25:03,573
Thank you.
326
00:25:03,705 --> 00:25:06,789
Hey, what are big brothers for?
327
00:25:08,168 --> 00:25:10,000
See you upstairs.
328
00:25:11,213 --> 00:25:13,500
- I don't need you. - Shh!
329
00:25:19,888 --> 00:25:21,754
The boozehounds return.
330
00:25:22,808 --> 00:25:24,640
What a joke!
331
00:25:24,768 --> 00:25:26,384
Hi, girls.
332
00:25:37,697 --> 00:25:39,814
Feeling kind of queasy?
333
00:25:39,950 --> 00:25:46,038
How about... a nice greasy pork sandwich
334
00:25:46,164 --> 00:25:48,781
served in a dirty ashtray?
335
00:25:59,594 --> 00:26:01,836
He pukes, you die.
336
00:26:02,973 --> 00:26:05,090
He's not laughing at you, Chet. It's just...
337
00:26:05,225 --> 00:26:07,262
Yes, I am.
338
00:26:07,394 --> 00:26:10,603
Did you tell Chet about...? Did he tell you about the woman we made tonight?
339
00:26:10,730 --> 00:26:13,393
He's obviously had it. He doesn't know what he's talking about.
340
00:26:13,525 --> 00:26:17,064
- No shit? - No shit, Chet. No shit.
341
00:26:17,195 --> 00:26:20,688
You two donkey dicks couldn't get laid in a morgue.
342
00:26:20,824 --> 00:26:22,941
You're right. You are absolutely right.
343
00:26:23,076 --> 00:26:25,659
- You're absolutely right, Chet... - Get him outta here.
344
00:26:25,787 --> 00:26:27,995
- What? - Come on.
345
00:26:39,843 --> 00:26:42,836
Cold-blooded shit he is. He's an asshole.
346
00:26:42,971 --> 00:26:46,339
Look at his haircut. Anybody with a haircut like that you know is an asshole...
347
00:27:05,118 --> 00:27:06,905
Psst! Lisa.
348
00:27:09,623 --> 00:27:11,615
Where are you?
349
00:27:13,543 --> 00:27:15,535
I'm right behind you.
350
00:27:19,174 --> 00:27:20,585
Surprise!
351
00:27:28,725 --> 00:27:30,557
I'm not going to hurt you, you silly thing.
352
00:27:30,685 --> 00:27:33,428
I mean, your lips. They feel like rigor mortis has set in.
353
00:27:33,563 --> 00:27:36,772
Why don't you try and relax a little bit? I'm only kissing you.
354
00:27:38,526 --> 00:27:41,690
I wasn't expecting you to kiss me. I was just...
355
00:27:54,417 --> 00:27:56,249
That was better.
356
00:27:58,255 --> 00:28:00,463
Want to try it again?
357
00:28:00,590 --> 00:28:04,630
If you don't mind. I mean, yes, please, ma'am.
358
00:28:23,488 --> 00:28:27,823
- You sure you're only 15? - I'll be 16 in June.
359
00:28:29,744 --> 00:28:31,360
You made me.
360
00:28:32,038 --> 00:28:33,654
You control me.
361
00:28:39,087 --> 00:28:42,421
What's on your mind? What are you thinking about, huh?
362
00:28:42,549 --> 00:28:43,756
Um...
363
00:28:44,801 --> 00:28:46,758
Women's gymnastics.
364
00:28:48,263 --> 00:28:50,755
Well, I don't know. I'll do my best.
365
00:28:52,142 --> 00:28:53,474
Good.
366
00:29:30,180 --> 00:29:35,016
Wyatt, Wyatt, Wyatt, where are you?
367
00:29:35,143 --> 00:29:38,227
- I'm right here, Gary. - Wyatt, what happened?
368
00:29:38,355 --> 00:29:39,971
I don't know.
369
00:29:40,106 --> 00:29:42,063
I think it was a dream.
370
00:29:44,819 --> 00:29:45,980
What?
371
00:29:46,112 --> 00:29:48,149
Everything. Last night. Lisa.
372
00:29:48,281 --> 00:29:50,364
The whole thing, it had to be a dream.
373
00:29:50,492 --> 00:29:53,951
It can't be a dream, Wyatt. We were both in it.
374
00:29:54,079 --> 00:29:56,696
How can two people have the same dream?
375
00:29:57,624 --> 00:29:59,911
There's no other explanation. It had to be a dream.
376
00:30:00,043 --> 00:30:03,081
Wait, let's analyze this. Alright, in your dream...
377
00:30:04,381 --> 00:30:06,781
did I get up in the middle of the night and yak in your sink?
378
00:30:07,842 --> 00:30:11,176
Didn't throw up. No. Nothing. You didn't see anything.
379
00:30:11,304 --> 00:30:13,341
Maybe it was a dream, you know.
380
00:30:14,224 --> 00:30:17,888
A very weird, bizarre, vivid...
381
00:30:19,437 --> 00:30:23,556
...erotic, wet, detailed dream.
382
00:30:25,193 --> 00:30:26,729
Maybe we have malaria.
383
00:30:27,320 --> 00:30:28,606
Shit.
384
00:30:36,371 --> 00:30:39,955
Gary! Wyatt! Breakfast!
385
00:30:44,254 --> 00:30:47,463
Look, I don't have the kind of bucks it would take to pay Chet off about this.
386
00:30:47,590 --> 00:30:49,252
Yo, Wyatt! Coffee!
387
00:30:49,384 --> 00:30:52,923
You can't live in fear of Chet for the rest of your life.
388
00:30:53,054 --> 00:30:55,011
Why not? Just please...
389
00:30:57,434 --> 00:31:01,895
I don't know, Wyatt. I mean, it's seriously affecting your sex life.
390
00:31:02,021 --> 00:31:05,890
Ten seconds into my gymnastics routine, you passed out.
391
00:31:06,025 --> 00:31:07,482
You slept.
392
00:31:08,528 --> 00:31:10,064
I did my toes.
393
00:31:10,196 --> 00:31:12,904
By the way, you're very cute.
394
00:31:13,032 --> 00:31:15,740
We'll try it again some other time, OK?
395
00:31:19,497 --> 00:31:22,661
- Good morning, turd brain. - Hi, Chet.
396
00:31:27,797 --> 00:31:31,837
- You spit in this? - Not that I'm aware of, no.
397
00:31:32,927 --> 00:31:35,044
Hey, that looks pretty good.
398
00:31:40,810 --> 00:31:43,427
Now make yourself one, dick weed.
399
00:31:50,278 --> 00:31:52,611
I like your panties.
400
00:31:52,739 --> 00:31:56,073
It's a joke, Chet. You know, it's all...
401
00:31:56,201 --> 00:32:00,161
That's not a joke! That is a severe behavioral disorder.
402
00:32:00,288 --> 00:32:02,780
Those are women's underpants!
403
00:32:02,916 --> 00:32:05,624
The next thing you know, you'll be wearing a bra on your head.
404
00:32:06,920 --> 00:32:10,163
The old man's gonna have a stroke on this one for sure.
405
00:32:11,466 --> 00:32:13,503
Alright, Chet. How much?
406
00:32:13,635 --> 00:32:15,001
How much?
407
00:32:15,136 --> 00:32:18,550
Oh, this goes way beyond payment, pal.
408
00:32:18,681 --> 00:32:20,547
Come on, Chet. Please?
409
00:32:22,393 --> 00:32:23,804
Well...
410
00:32:26,439 --> 00:32:28,726
Your VCR should cover it.
411
00:32:28,858 --> 00:32:30,850
For openers.
412
00:32:30,985 --> 00:32:32,396
Thank you.
413
00:32:33,196 --> 00:32:36,189
For Christ's sakes, will you cover yourself?
414
00:32:56,177 --> 00:32:59,796
You guys looking for something for your mom?
415
00:33:01,849 --> 00:33:04,387
I really don't think so... Sue.
416
00:33:06,479 --> 00:33:09,688
You guys have, uh... girlfriends?
417
00:33:09,816 --> 00:33:12,729
You know, Sue, one does really not refer
418
00:33:12,860 --> 00:33:15,648
to a 23-year-old woman as a girlfriend.
419
00:33:16,281 --> 00:33:18,568
- A mistress, Gar. - Mistress.
420
00:33:18,700 --> 00:33:20,566
- Lover. - Sexpot.
421
00:33:20,702 --> 00:33:22,910
She's a sexpot is what she is.
422
00:33:23,037 --> 00:33:27,998
You guys are the ones that got beat up at the homecoming game, right?
423
00:33:28,126 --> 00:33:29,742
Hmm...
424
00:33:31,879 --> 00:33:36,965
Uh... Susan, do you think you could wrap up a bottle of this scent for me?
425
00:33:37,093 --> 00:33:39,801
- I like this. - Um... two.
426
00:33:39,929 --> 00:33:42,387
And why don't you set yourself up with one of them, too.
427
00:33:42,515 --> 00:33:45,758
Set yourself up. That's three scents, please.
428
00:33:45,893 --> 00:33:49,102
- If you were a 15-year-old boy... - Hmm...
429
00:33:49,897 --> 00:33:52,514
- ...would these turn you on? - Hmm...?
430
00:33:53,568 --> 00:33:56,151
I think so, too. I'll take them.
431
00:34:02,952 --> 00:34:06,161
Uh... do you have a bra to match that?
432
00:34:06,289 --> 00:34:09,248
Something in leather or rubber, or barb wire?
433
00:34:09,375 --> 00:34:11,332
Give me a break.
434
00:34:14,047 --> 00:34:15,788
Check it out. Check it out.
435
00:34:15,923 --> 00:34:17,209
What?
436
00:34:21,971 --> 00:34:23,257
Five bucks?
437
00:34:23,389 --> 00:34:24,800
Finsky.
438
00:34:27,477 --> 00:34:29,309
Max, what are you gonna do?
439
00:34:33,650 --> 00:34:36,142
- You know what, Gar? - Hmm?
440
00:34:36,277 --> 00:34:39,987
For the first time in my life, I don't feel like a total dick.
441
00:34:40,114 --> 00:34:41,605
Yeah, me either.
442
00:34:53,670 --> 00:34:56,287
Sorry, boys. Momentary loss of motor nerves.
443
00:34:56,422 --> 00:34:59,665
Getting tired of this? We're not. But I'll tell you, there is a cure.
444
00:34:59,801 --> 00:35:02,635
Rumor has it, there's a big white sale going on.
445
00:35:02,762 --> 00:35:04,924
- At Towel World! - Towel World!
446
00:35:05,973 --> 00:35:08,181
- We're not impressed. - No.
447
00:35:14,649 --> 00:35:16,936
Can I have some of that, please?
448
00:35:19,362 --> 00:35:21,354
You know I'm getting really bored of their shit.
449
00:35:21,489 --> 00:35:24,277
- Well, do you wanna dump them? - I don't know.
450
00:35:24,409 --> 00:35:27,993
We have been with them three months. We've been to the parties, met the people.
451
00:35:28,121 --> 00:35:30,738
We won't go to any more parties and we won't meet any more people.
452
00:35:30,873 --> 00:35:32,865
We'll go into a social coma.
453
00:35:33,918 --> 00:35:35,329
- Sorry. - Sorry.
454
00:35:35,461 --> 00:35:36,872
We're sorry.
455
00:35:37,004 --> 00:35:40,042
- Wanna give them another chance? - OK.
456
00:35:41,259 --> 00:35:43,000
- Will you forgive us? - Please.
457
00:35:43,136 --> 00:35:45,002
Oh, you guys.
458
00:35:45,722 --> 00:35:48,135
What are we gonna do with you?
459
00:35:55,273 --> 00:35:56,684
♪Whoo!
460
00:36:02,822 --> 00:36:06,486
♪Pretty woman, walking down the street
461
00:36:06,617 --> 00:36:10,327
♪Pretty woman, the kind I like to meet
462
00:36:10,455 --> 00:36:12,037
♪Pretty woman
463
00:36:13,040 --> 00:36:16,829
♪I don't believe you, it must be true
464
00:36:16,961 --> 00:36:20,625
- ♪No one can look as good as you... - Who was that girl?
465
00:36:21,674 --> 00:36:23,711
- Excuse me! - Get outta my way!
466
00:36:24,761 --> 00:36:26,502
We got her, we got her, we got her.
467
00:36:28,431 --> 00:36:32,095
♪Pretty woman, won't you pardon me?
468
00:36:32,185 --> 00:36:36,179
♪Pretty woman, I couldn't help but see
469
00:36:36,481 --> 00:36:37,892
Hey!
470
00:36:38,691 --> 00:36:42,435
♪Oh, you look lovely as can be... ♪
472 00:36:38,238 --> 00:36:39,445 Hey!
471
00:36:46,199 --> 00:36:47,406
Hi.
472
00:36:49,827 --> 00:36:51,989
- That's Ian. - This is Max.
473
00:36:53,080 --> 00:36:55,117
We call him Mad Max.
474
00:36:56,667 --> 00:36:59,125
- We saw you on the escalator. - Yeah.
475
00:37:00,171 --> 00:37:02,629
Yeah, you were looking at us, right?
476
00:37:02,757 --> 00:37:04,248
Yeah.
477
00:37:10,473 --> 00:37:13,841
- So what are you doing? - Nothing. I'm waiting for my ride.
478
00:37:28,616 --> 00:37:31,734
Lis, come on, hon. We're running late.
479
00:37:31,869 --> 00:37:33,826
Honey, move.
480
00:37:34,497 --> 00:37:36,329
Speak to you later.
481
00:37:47,009 --> 00:37:50,878
She likes the rough stuff. What can I do, you know?
482
00:37:55,935 --> 00:37:59,349
By the way, there's a party tonight at Wyatt's house.
483
00:37:59,480 --> 00:38:03,645
You can find his name in the students' directory under Donnelly.
484
00:38:03,776 --> 00:38:05,358
Pass the word around.
485
00:38:09,824 --> 00:38:11,315
Party?
486
00:38:19,208 --> 00:38:20,665
Don't ask.
487
00:38:22,795 --> 00:38:25,065
Wyatt, you're gonna have a heart attack by the time you're 40
488
00:38:25,089 --> 00:38:27,422
if you don't learn to relax.
489
00:38:27,550 --> 00:38:29,792
Have you tried inversion boots?
490
00:38:30,678 --> 00:38:33,637
Lisa, you don't understand my parents.
491
00:38:34,974 --> 00:38:36,681
What's there to understand?
492
00:38:36,809 --> 00:38:40,223
They're oppressive, meddlesome, difficult, demanding and totally bizarre.
493
00:38:40,354 --> 00:38:42,141
I mean, they're normal parents.
494
00:38:42,273 --> 00:38:45,016
Now stop worrying and go and get dressed.
495
00:38:46,235 --> 00:38:48,477
Lisa, I created you.
496
00:38:48,613 --> 00:38:51,321
Why do you do insist on doing things I don't want?
497
00:38:51,449 --> 00:38:54,032
Honey buns, you want to party so badly, you could bottle it.
498
00:38:54,160 --> 00:38:56,520
I mean, you and Gary, you want friends, you want popularity,
499
00:38:56,579 --> 00:38:58,366
you want all that stuff, right?
500
00:38:58,497 --> 00:39:01,205
Well, I've thought about it, sure, but...
501
00:39:02,752 --> 00:39:04,835
So I'm giving it to you.
502
00:39:06,797 --> 00:39:08,379
Thank you, really, thank you.
503
00:39:08,507 --> 00:39:11,090
But I don't want it in my house.
504
00:39:11,218 --> 00:39:14,837
If you want to be a party animal, you have to learn to live in the jungle.
505
00:39:14,972 --> 00:39:17,464
Now stop worrying and go and get dressed.
506
00:39:17,600 --> 00:39:20,058
I'm going to go and pick up Gary.
507
00:39:20,186 --> 00:39:22,519
I can't wait to meet his parents.
508
00:39:30,571 --> 00:39:32,984
Do you go to Gary's school?
509
00:39:34,992 --> 00:39:37,951
Do I look like I'm in high school?
510
00:39:38,079 --> 00:39:39,320
No.
511
00:39:39,455 --> 00:39:43,790
Well, what it is, Dad, she's a foreign exchange student, you know,
512
00:39:43,918 --> 00:39:46,831
and they have, like, a different educational system around the world.
513
00:39:46,963 --> 00:39:48,579
You look very, er...
514
00:39:49,966 --> 00:39:51,377
...mature.
515
00:39:51,509 --> 00:39:55,719
Doesn't she? That's funny you say that cos I was thinking the same thing.
516
00:39:55,846 --> 00:39:57,428
And what happened was that, uh...
517
00:39:57,556 --> 00:39:59,639
So what do you do for a living, Al?
518
00:40:00,184 --> 00:40:02,471
I'm an independent businessman.
519
00:40:02,603 --> 00:40:07,064
Al... Dad... My dad's a plumber. And he's into plumbing.
520
00:40:07,191 --> 00:40:09,649
And, well, I guess you plumb, right, Dad?
521
00:40:10,653 --> 00:40:12,269
Yeah.
522
00:40:12,405 --> 00:40:14,271
Yeah, well, I, uh...
523
00:40:14,407 --> 00:40:18,117
- I think it's time to go. You ready? - Where do you think you're going?
524
00:40:18,244 --> 00:40:20,236
- To a party. - To a movie.
525
00:40:21,247 --> 00:40:23,239
Movie party is what it is, folks.
526
00:40:23,374 --> 00:40:25,957
- We're going to a movie party. - Such a little liar.
527
00:40:26,085 --> 00:40:29,795
No, I've whipped up this nasty little soirée over at his friend Wyatt's house.
528
00:40:29,922 --> 00:40:33,882
- "Soir" what? - Soirée, honey. I think that means party.
529
00:40:35,011 --> 00:40:36,377
Party.
530
00:40:36,512 --> 00:40:38,615
You know, there's going to be sex, drugs, rock 'n' roll,
531
00:40:38,639 --> 00:40:40,505
chips, dips, chains, whips...
532
00:40:40,641 --> 00:40:43,224
You know, your basic high school orgy type of thing.
533
00:40:43,352 --> 00:40:46,971
I mean, I'm not talking candle wax on the nipples
534
00:40:47,106 --> 00:40:48,938
or witchcraft or anything like that.
535
00:40:49,066 --> 00:40:51,979
No, no, no, no, just a couple of hundred kids
536
00:40:52,111 --> 00:40:54,945
running around in their underwear acting like complete animals.
537
00:40:55,072 --> 00:40:58,236
Alright, goddamn it! I've heard enough!
538
00:40:58,367 --> 00:41:00,404
- Gary, you get to your room! - Yes, sir!
539
00:41:00,536 --> 00:41:03,779
No, it's OK. Just sit here. I'll take care of this.
540
00:41:03,914 --> 00:41:08,158
Girlie, you get the hell outta here before I throw you out.
541
00:41:08,294 --> 00:41:10,536
Don't threaten me, Al!
542
00:41:10,671 --> 00:41:13,209
You're out of shape. I'll kick your arse.
543
00:41:13,340 --> 00:41:17,505
I'm going to make this real easy for you.
544
00:41:17,636 --> 00:41:21,095
I'm taking Gary to a party.
545
00:41:21,223 --> 00:41:23,010
Over my dead body.
546
00:41:23,142 --> 00:41:28,809
He's a good kid. He studies hard. You've got no complaints.
547
00:41:28,939 --> 00:41:31,431
If anybody should be bitching, it should be Gary.
548
00:41:32,234 --> 00:41:34,442
You ever compliment him on his grades?
549
00:41:34,570 --> 00:41:36,937
You ever compliment him on anything?
550
00:41:37,073 --> 00:41:40,282
Hey! Hey! Look, Ma, compliments embarrass me.
551
00:41:40,409 --> 00:41:42,150
- Dad, you know... - Shut up!
552
00:41:43,954 --> 00:41:46,412
Have you ever wondered how sad it is
553
00:41:46,540 --> 00:41:49,453
that your son's only sexual outlet
554
00:41:49,585 --> 00:41:52,828
is tossing off to magazines in the bathroom?
555
00:41:52,963 --> 00:41:54,750
Oh, Gary!
556
00:41:54,882 --> 00:41:58,592
Ma, I never tossed off to anything!
557
00:41:58,719 --> 00:42:02,258
- You told me you were combing your hair! - But I was! I was! Mom!
558
00:42:02,389 --> 00:42:05,348
- Gary, shut up! - The water's running all day long...
559
00:42:05,476 --> 00:42:08,139
- Shut up! - I've never tossed off!
560
00:42:08,270 --> 00:42:11,559
- I've never tossed off! - And you wouldn't tell your own mother!
561
00:42:11,690 --> 00:42:12,851
Shut up!
562
00:42:12,983 --> 00:42:15,191
Shut up! Shut up!
563
00:42:17,738 --> 00:42:20,731
This guy deserves a party.
564
00:42:21,325 --> 00:42:24,033
Look, I don't know who you are,
565
00:42:24,161 --> 00:42:27,450
what you are, or where you came from,
566
00:42:28,207 --> 00:42:30,540
but I'm not taking any more of this.
567
00:42:31,502 --> 00:42:35,291
Dial the police, Lucy. Dial the damn police and give me the phone.
568
00:42:35,422 --> 00:42:39,507
The phone... I'm going to get the...
569
00:42:39,635 --> 00:42:42,878
- Give me the phone. - I'm trying to... Well, here it is.
570
00:42:49,478 --> 00:42:53,267
Jesus, God. Oh, Christ.
571
00:42:53,399 --> 00:42:55,812
Oh, Lord God.
572
00:42:58,863 --> 00:43:01,401
Oh... Uh-oh...
573
00:43:02,366 --> 00:43:03,982
Go ahead...
574
00:43:04,827 --> 00:43:06,489
Make your day?
575
00:43:12,334 --> 00:43:14,872
I'm really sorry it has to come to this.
576
00:43:15,004 --> 00:43:16,495
Come to what?
577
00:43:17,756 --> 00:43:20,874
If you don't cheer up, I'll blow your face off.
578
00:43:33,314 --> 00:43:35,977
Oh, come on, don't be such an old lady. Everything's cool.
579
00:43:36,108 --> 00:43:38,145
Everything's cool! Everything's cool.
580
00:43:38,277 --> 00:43:40,234
Yeah, yeah. My dad's going to castrate me.
581
00:43:40,362 --> 00:43:42,354
And my mother almost had, like, a cardiac arrest.
582
00:43:42,489 --> 00:43:45,635
My parents'll never let me in the house, and if they do, I'll be grounded till I'm 45.
583
00:43:45,659 --> 00:43:47,762
Other than that, everything's great. Everything's just really cool.
584
00:43:47,786 --> 00:43:50,199
I mean, you know, it couldn't be better.
585
00:43:51,332 --> 00:43:53,494
Listen, trust me for once, will you?
586
00:43:55,753 --> 00:43:58,245
They don't know what happened.
587
00:44:01,508 --> 00:44:05,343
Did you think Gary was acting a little strangely this evening?
588
00:44:07,389 --> 00:44:08,675
Gary?
589
00:44:10,142 --> 00:44:11,599
Who's Gary?
590
00:44:16,357 --> 00:44:19,316
Lisa, you have to promise me
591
00:44:19,443 --> 00:44:21,776
that things aren't gonna get out of control.
592
00:44:21,904 --> 00:44:25,648
Wyatt, don't worry. You're just having a few friends over.
593
00:44:25,783 --> 00:44:27,991
I don't have any friends, Lisa.
594
00:44:28,118 --> 00:44:29,734
He doesn't.
595
00:44:31,121 --> 00:44:32,908
Boy ain't lying.
596
00:44:34,833 --> 00:44:36,495
You do now.
597
00:44:44,885 --> 00:44:45,966
Hi.
598
00:44:46,095 --> 00:44:48,508
Hi!
599
00:44:48,639 --> 00:44:49,720
Party!
600
00:44:49,848 --> 00:44:53,307
Party! Party! Party! Party!
601
00:44:53,435 --> 00:44:55,097
Party! Party! Party! Party!
602
00:44:57,189 --> 00:44:59,602
♪Standin' there by the window
603
00:44:59,733 --> 00:45:02,191
♪Starin' out at the night
604
00:45:02,319 --> 00:45:04,732
♪You've got so many troubles
605
00:45:04,863 --> 00:45:07,276
♪On your nervous mind
606
00:45:07,408 --> 00:45:09,821
♪But don't worry, baby
607
00:45:09,952 --> 00:45:12,194
♪It's gonna work out fine
608
00:45:12,329 --> 00:45:15,322
♪You hear the sound of footsteps
609
00:45:15,457 --> 00:45:17,790
♪Stealing across the floor
610
00:45:17,918 --> 00:45:20,126
♪You picked up the receiver...
611
00:45:20,671 --> 00:45:22,003
Yo!
612
00:45:22,131 --> 00:45:24,919
Who's here? How you doing? How you doing?
613
00:45:26,093 --> 00:45:27,880
- Where's the bar? - Bar!
614
00:45:31,223 --> 00:45:34,011
Do you think they'll embarrass us tonight?
615
00:45:34,143 --> 00:45:35,554
Yeah.
616
00:45:35,686 --> 00:45:37,302
- Yeah? - Yeah.
617
00:45:42,651 --> 00:45:43,937
Caviar?
618
00:45:44,903 --> 00:45:47,737
If Max and Ian see her, it is all over for us.
619
00:45:49,616 --> 00:45:52,700
- How's your stomach? - It's a little better.
620
00:45:52,828 --> 00:45:56,196
If you're gonna float an air biscuit, let me know, OK?
621
00:45:56,332 --> 00:45:57,914
Float a what?
622
00:45:58,042 --> 00:46:00,020
If you're gonna fart, if you're gonna squeeze cheese,
623
00:46:00,044 --> 00:46:01,626
let me know, OK? I'll hit the fan.
624
00:46:01,754 --> 00:46:04,747
I'm sorry, Gary, it's just I suffer pain and discomfort
625
00:46:04,882 --> 00:46:07,716
due to occasional stomach upset.
626
00:46:07,843 --> 00:46:10,756
You know, I can't believe this, Wyatt. I'm so disappointed in us.
627
00:46:10,888 --> 00:46:13,074
All we ever do is sit around and talk about how great it would be
628
00:46:13,098 --> 00:46:14,555
if we went to parties, right?
629
00:46:14,683 --> 00:46:17,203
And now it's our party, and there are hundreds of people here having a great time,
630
00:46:17,227 --> 00:46:19,059
and we're in the john. we're in the john!
631
00:46:19,188 --> 00:46:22,932
- I can't believe it. - Gary, you're just as uptight as I am.
632
00:46:23,067 --> 00:46:25,559
Let me tell you something. Nobody can be as uptight as you, OK?
633
00:46:25,694 --> 00:46:27,731
Nobody. Your middle name is tense, OK?
634
00:46:27,863 --> 00:46:29,445
Wyatt "Tense Up" Donnelly.
635
00:46:29,573 --> 00:46:32,236
- Alright, this is true. This is true. - It's true.
636
00:46:32,368 --> 00:46:37,204
But... it's not that bad. I mean, we can hear the music.
637
00:46:38,040 --> 00:46:39,531
We can dance, so that's great.
638
00:46:39,666 --> 00:46:42,020
If we put our noses to the door, maybe we can smell the food.
639
00:46:42,044 --> 00:46:43,535
Hey, brother!
640
00:46:43,670 --> 00:46:46,037
What's happening, my main man?
641
00:46:46,173 --> 00:46:47,459
Right on!
642
00:46:48,133 --> 00:46:50,295
- Scotch. - Straight up?
643
00:46:50,427 --> 00:46:52,134
Ah, give me the whole bottle.
644
00:46:52,262 --> 00:46:57,098
Tell you what... you bend over and I'll shove it straight up your ass.
645
00:46:58,310 --> 00:47:01,098
On the rocks is fine.
646
00:47:02,564 --> 00:47:05,557
Yeah, that's what I thought you were gonna say, you jive turkey.
647
00:47:18,997 --> 00:47:20,113
There she is.
648
00:47:20,249 --> 00:47:22,161
You deal with the drinks. I'll kill the girls.
649
00:47:54,450 --> 00:47:56,362
- Hi. - Hi!
650
00:47:58,412 --> 00:47:59,869
OK, OK, OK...
651
00:47:59,997 --> 00:48:02,239
- Did we see you at the mall today? - Yes.
652
00:48:02,374 --> 00:48:03,865
Oh, yeah!
653
00:48:06,670 --> 00:48:09,128
It's alright... Um...
654
00:48:09,256 --> 00:48:11,623
- What are you doing here? - I'm living here now.
655
00:48:11,758 --> 00:48:13,670
I'm Wyatt and Gary's girlfriend.
656
00:48:13,802 --> 00:48:16,419
No!
657
00:48:17,264 --> 00:48:21,429
Ah! OK... We're Wyatt's friends.
658
00:48:21,560 --> 00:48:24,394
Er... can we come to the party or should we just bail?
659
00:48:24,521 --> 00:48:26,103
Bail!
660
00:48:28,984 --> 00:48:31,397
- No, no, come in, come on. - Really?
661
00:48:31,528 --> 00:48:32,939
Oh, thank you.
662
00:48:33,906 --> 00:48:36,193
Gary and Wyatt are around here someplace.
663
00:48:36,325 --> 00:48:38,783
I wonder if Lisa's having a good time.
664
00:48:38,911 --> 00:48:42,450
Lisa could have a good time at an insurance seminar, Wyatt.
665
00:48:42,581 --> 00:48:45,574
You know, the thing that really galls me
666
00:48:46,793 --> 00:48:50,207
is that she's ours and we can't get close to her.
667
00:48:52,799 --> 00:48:54,290
Hit the fan.
668
00:48:57,930 --> 00:48:59,887
This is, like, the best party I've ever been to.
669
00:49:00,015 --> 00:49:02,302
I know. It's great!
670
00:49:02,434 --> 00:49:04,972
Do you know whose house this is?
671
00:49:05,103 --> 00:49:09,393
I don't know. I think it might be that girl with the English accent.
672
00:49:09,525 --> 00:49:13,269
Did you notice that girl doesn't have a zit on her whole body? Did you notice that?
673
00:49:13,403 --> 00:49:16,567
- I know. She has, like, zero fat. - And she's so relaxed.
674
00:49:16,698 --> 00:49:18,781
- She burped and it was, like, charming. - Charming.
675
00:49:18,909 --> 00:49:19,990
Yeah!
676
00:49:21,787 --> 00:49:22,994
Shit.
677
00:49:24,331 --> 00:49:26,163
- Ah, yeah. - The bathroom.
678
00:49:34,258 --> 00:49:35,499
- Ladies. - Hi.
679
00:49:35,634 --> 00:49:37,045
Hi.
680
00:49:38,554 --> 00:49:40,295
I can't believe you! I cannot...
681
00:49:40,430 --> 00:49:43,013
You're dropping wolf bait and there are chicks outside!
682
00:49:43,141 --> 00:49:46,475
Light a match or something! Light a fire, I don't know.
683
00:49:48,689 --> 00:49:50,430
Hi.
684
00:49:50,566 --> 00:49:51,977
Hi.
685
00:49:52,109 --> 00:49:54,647
We're sorry. We thought there were just girls in there.
686
00:49:54,778 --> 00:49:57,737
- I'm sorry. - It's just us dudes, you know.
687
00:49:57,864 --> 00:49:59,526
What are you doing here?
688
00:50:00,200 --> 00:50:02,783
Gary was just taking a shit!
689
00:50:02,911 --> 00:50:04,573
No, what I meant was...
690
00:50:06,873 --> 00:50:09,911
No, no, what I meant was, what are you doing at the party?
691
00:50:10,043 --> 00:50:13,332
- Oh, it's my house. - This is your party?
692
00:50:13,463 --> 00:50:16,376
Yeah, well, you know, we like to do this about once a week,
693
00:50:16,508 --> 00:50:18,903
throw little gatherings here, little get-togethers, that kind of thing.
694
00:50:18,927 --> 00:50:20,884
- Haven't you guys been by? - No.
695
00:50:21,013 --> 00:50:23,096
No? How the heck did we miss these two, Wyatt?
696
00:50:23,223 --> 00:50:25,806
I don't know. So many people, so many parties.
697
00:50:25,934 --> 00:50:29,518
So many people, you know, and so many parties, you lose track...
698
00:50:29,646 --> 00:50:33,265
Um... would you mind if I came in and checked my face?
699
00:50:33,400 --> 00:50:35,517
What's wrong with your face?
700
00:50:37,571 --> 00:50:38,903
Can we come in?
701
00:50:39,031 --> 00:50:41,739
- Come on in. - Sure, yeah. OK. Be our guests.
702
00:50:41,867 --> 00:50:44,860
- Thanks, guys. - Come on in.
703
00:50:46,997 --> 00:50:48,954
Well, um...
704
00:50:49,082 --> 00:50:51,082
We've seen you guys at school, but we've never met.
705
00:50:51,209 --> 00:50:52,575
- You're Hilly. - You're Deb.
706
00:50:52,711 --> 00:50:54,202
- How you doing? - Deb.
707
00:50:54,338 --> 00:50:56,330
- Hi. I'm Gary. - I'm Wyatt.
708
00:50:56,465 --> 00:50:58,297
Well, what have you guys been doing?
709
00:51:00,093 --> 00:51:03,803
This is a wild crowd. I didn't know you guys had so many friends.
710
00:51:03,930 --> 00:51:05,887
- Yeah, neither did we. - Neither did we.
711
00:51:07,059 --> 00:51:11,224
Uh, who's the girl with the accent? I thought that this was her party, but...
712
00:51:11,355 --> 00:51:15,224
You mean the real sensuous, exotic, sexy, mature, sex symbol type?
713
00:51:15,359 --> 00:51:16,975
- Yeah. - Yeah.
714
00:51:17,110 --> 00:51:19,443
She's with us.
715
00:51:19,571 --> 00:51:21,904
She's with you guys?
716
00:51:22,532 --> 00:51:24,569
Come on, Lisa. Why not?
717
00:51:26,495 --> 00:51:29,659
Because I belong to Gary and Wyatt.
718
00:51:29,790 --> 00:51:33,875
Belong? What? They make you in the garage with power tools?
719
00:51:34,002 --> 00:51:36,085
They own you? Control you?
720
00:51:36,213 --> 00:51:39,001
- Seriously? - Seriously.
721
00:51:39,132 --> 00:51:40,498
They're toads.
722
00:51:40,634 --> 00:51:43,217
Do I look like I'd go out with two toads?
723
00:51:44,513 --> 00:51:47,506
You do. It's true.
724
00:51:47,641 --> 00:51:51,806
I think Gary and Wyatt are gonna force everyone to redefine their terms.
725
00:51:53,689 --> 00:51:56,557
And you're completely loyal to them?
726
00:51:56,692 --> 00:51:59,810
I do whatever they say.
727
00:52:11,206 --> 00:52:12,367
Hi.
728
00:52:15,168 --> 00:52:18,787
Could you excuse us for a minute, please?
729
00:52:18,922 --> 00:52:21,881
Ah, that's no problem. Yeah, we'll be in here.
730
00:52:22,008 --> 00:52:23,419
Yeah.
731
00:52:31,351 --> 00:52:32,967
OK, fine.
732
00:52:36,606 --> 00:52:38,835
I could be wrong, but I think these ladies are stoked for us, Wyatt.
733
00:52:38,859 --> 00:52:40,619
- I got that feeling myself. - What do we do?
734
00:52:40,736 --> 00:52:42,213
- I don't know. - Should we go for it?
735
00:52:42,237 --> 00:52:44,048
- What about Lisa? - She did say we should party.
736
00:52:44,072 --> 00:52:46,300
Let's get it on with these two, score points and go back to Lisa.
737
00:52:46,324 --> 00:52:47,656
This is like a dream come true.
738
00:52:47,784 --> 00:52:50,680
How about if we see if we can score with these two in case we can't later?
739
00:52:50,704 --> 00:52:52,741
- Sounds good. - But we gotta give Lisa a shot.
740
00:52:52,873 --> 00:52:56,207
I don't wanna hurt her feelings. The girls want a long, lean bone job from me.
741
00:52:56,334 --> 00:52:57,745
- Ready to party down? - 10-4.
742
00:52:57,878 --> 00:52:59,119
- Let's break. - Break.
743
00:53:11,391 --> 00:53:13,383
Those guys are weird, but they're kind of cute.
744
00:53:13,518 --> 00:53:15,009
- Hi. - Hi!
745
00:53:15,145 --> 00:53:18,559
And where did you two disappear to?
746
00:53:18,690 --> 00:53:21,933
- Nowhere. We were in the kitchen. - We were in the bathroom.
747
00:53:22,861 --> 00:53:24,727
- Eating. - Doing our hair.
748
00:53:24,863 --> 00:53:26,855
Have you met Gary and Wyatt?
749
00:53:27,449 --> 00:53:29,486
- Yeah. - No.
750
00:53:29,618 --> 00:53:30,904
Sort of.
751
00:53:32,996 --> 00:53:36,615
If you get the chance... shower with them.
752
00:53:36,750 --> 00:53:39,788
I did. It's a mind scrambler!
753
00:53:40,629 --> 00:53:42,621
Oh! Hurts so good.
754
00:53:48,303 --> 00:53:50,545
She took a shower with them.
755
00:53:50,680 --> 00:53:53,514
- I have a wonderful idea, Henry. - Hmm?
756
00:53:53,642 --> 00:53:57,761
After dinner, why don't we stop by and visit with Wyatt?
757
00:53:57,896 --> 00:54:01,731
I hate to think of his being alone at home tonight.
758
00:54:01,858 --> 00:54:05,568
- Doesn't he have anything to read? - Well, I don't know, dear.
759
00:54:05,695 --> 00:54:09,063
But you know nothing's more important to a teenage boy
760
00:54:09,199 --> 00:54:11,407
than his grandparents.
761
00:54:11,535 --> 00:54:13,447
- We'll drop by. - Oh, good.
762
00:54:27,342 --> 00:54:31,837
I'd like to open up by apologizing for the Icee today at the mall.
763
00:54:31,972 --> 00:54:34,680
It was very immature, and I'm sorry.
764
00:54:34,808 --> 00:54:38,643
- And, uh... - It was just, like, tomfoolery.
765
00:54:38,770 --> 00:54:40,602
But we are sorry.
766
00:54:40,730 --> 00:54:43,143
- It happened. - Yeah.
767
00:54:43,817 --> 00:54:47,151
So what's the deal with Lisa? You know, can we borrow her?
768
00:54:47,779 --> 00:54:50,146
Uh... we can't do that, guys,
769
00:54:50,282 --> 00:54:52,524
because common decency prohibits us, we can't.
770
00:54:52,659 --> 00:54:54,070
It's not cool.
771
00:54:54,202 --> 00:54:56,489
- Well, she said it was cool. - Yeah.
772
00:54:56,621 --> 00:55:00,456
We can't take advantage of her loyalty. Sorry, guys.
773
00:55:00,584 --> 00:55:03,497
Man, but that's really selfish. That hurts, you know.
774
00:55:03,628 --> 00:55:04,869
Ian, uh...
775
00:55:05,505 --> 00:55:07,505
Just forget it, guys, cos we can't do it, you know?
776
00:55:07,632 --> 00:55:10,545
Ah, come on. Quit being such pricks.
777
00:55:10,677 --> 00:55:11,793
Hey, come on.
778
00:55:11,928 --> 00:55:13,920
Regardless of what she may have told you,
779
00:55:14,055 --> 00:55:16,263
our feelings for Lisa run very deep.
780
00:55:16,391 --> 00:55:18,849
It's, like, emotions. Heavy, heavy emotions.
781
00:55:18,977 --> 00:55:21,845
Our feelings for Deb and Hilly run as deep as yours do for Lisa.
782
00:55:21,980 --> 00:55:23,391
And it's respect.
783
00:55:23,523 --> 00:55:25,765
It's like the time we spent together, you know.
784
00:55:25,901 --> 00:55:28,860
And a couple of guys like you deserve them.
785
00:55:28,987 --> 00:55:31,525
See, we like your style. So we wanna make a deal with you.
786
00:55:31,656 --> 00:55:33,773
You let us have a crack at Lisa,
787
00:55:33,909 --> 00:55:36,652
and then we'll let you have Deb and Hilly.
788
00:55:38,747 --> 00:55:40,613
Can you guys keep a secret?
789
00:55:40,749 --> 00:55:43,162
- Sure. - Secret?
790
00:55:43,293 --> 00:55:46,206
- Look again. It's Gary. - No, no.
791
00:55:46,338 --> 00:55:48,500
It's our boy, Gary.
792
00:55:48,632 --> 00:55:51,466
He's our 16-year-old boy.
793
00:55:51,593 --> 00:55:54,336
I don't know what the hell you're talking about, Lucy.
794
00:55:54,471 --> 00:55:56,884
And I want you to shut up.
795
00:55:57,682 --> 00:56:01,221
I feel like an asshole. This had better work.
796
00:56:01,353 --> 00:56:03,936
This is just the blueprint. OK, now look. You like it?
797
00:56:04,064 --> 00:56:05,771
Bigger tits.
798
00:56:05,899 --> 00:56:07,231
Go, go, go, go!
799
00:56:07,359 --> 00:56:09,146
Give him the knee-shooters. I don't care.
800
00:56:11,696 --> 00:56:15,690
'We have code penetration again. What the hell's going on in here?'
801
00:56:21,373 --> 00:56:23,205
Excuse me, Arthur.
802
00:56:23,333 --> 00:56:25,495
- It's Art. - Excuse me, Art.
803
00:56:40,141 --> 00:56:41,598
Oh, shit.
804
00:56:47,732 --> 00:56:48,732
♪Weird
805
00:56:51,277 --> 00:56:53,064
♪Weird science
806
00:56:57,075 --> 00:56:58,907
- 'Where's Eddie?' - 'Eddie's down in the lab.
807
00:56:59,035 --> 00:57:01,072
'He and Grandpa are working on a new project.'
808
00:57:01,204 --> 00:57:03,787
'Another invention?'
809
00:57:03,915 --> 00:57:06,202
'It's got something to do with a robot.'
810
00:57:19,889 --> 00:57:23,132
Wyatt, what's going on? Turn this thing off!
811
00:57:23,268 --> 00:57:25,385
You're gonna love it! How you doing?
812
00:57:25,520 --> 00:57:28,137
I'm shitting in my pants!
813
00:58:47,477 --> 00:58:48,888
It worked.
814
00:59:06,996 --> 00:59:11,081
You had to be big shots, didn't you? You had to show off.
815
00:59:12,252 --> 00:59:14,915
When are you going to learn people will like you for what you are,
816
00:59:15,046 --> 00:59:17,038
not for what you can give them?
817
00:59:19,217 --> 00:59:21,709
In your race for power and glory,
818
00:59:21,845 --> 00:59:24,633
you forgot one small detail.
819
00:59:26,141 --> 00:59:27,973
We forgot to hook up the doll.
820
00:59:28,101 --> 00:59:30,684
You forgot to hook up the doll.
821
01:00:13,271 --> 01:00:15,228
Something's going on here, Carmen.
822
01:00:15,356 --> 01:00:18,690
I have a feeling we're not going to approve, Henry.
823
01:00:20,320 --> 01:00:22,937
A missile! A missile!
824
01:00:23,907 --> 01:00:26,240
A missile in my house, Gary!
825
01:00:28,453 --> 01:00:32,572
- Yeah, this puppy's for real, alright. - It was an accident. Simple, you know...
826
01:00:32,707 --> 01:00:34,994
Accident, my ass, Gary!
827
01:00:35,126 --> 01:00:37,368
My parents are coming home. Chet's coming home.
828
01:00:37,503 --> 01:00:41,167
- They're gonna freak out! - They're gonna shit eggrolls.
829
01:00:41,299 --> 01:00:43,882
Get out! Get out! Scat!
830
01:00:44,010 --> 01:00:46,627
Out of here, you disgusting tramps!
831
01:00:46,763 --> 01:00:48,720
You, you, you hosers!
832
01:00:48,848 --> 01:00:50,840
Out! Out! Out!
833
01:00:50,975 --> 01:00:53,058
My God, cut that out, would you?
834
01:00:53,186 --> 01:00:55,456
You ought to know better than to walk into somebody's house
835
01:00:55,480 --> 01:00:57,688
and start hitting people with your Rex Harrison hat!
836
01:00:57,815 --> 01:01:01,308
This is my daughter's home. Who the hell are you?
837
01:01:01,444 --> 01:01:05,279
Well, I'm a very dear, close personal friend of your grandson's.
838
01:01:05,406 --> 01:01:07,443
Henry, call the police.
839
01:01:07,575 --> 01:01:10,238
I will. I'll have you incarcerated.
840
01:01:10,370 --> 01:01:12,783
Here's the deal, folks.
841
01:01:12,914 --> 01:01:16,658
Gary and Wyatt, they created me on their computer.
842
01:01:16,793 --> 01:01:20,161
I'm not going to stand here and listen to this baloney.
843
01:01:20,296 --> 01:01:23,505
He won't, you know. He doesn't stand for baloney.
844
01:01:24,050 --> 01:01:27,168
Would you mind waiting here? I won't be a moment.
845
01:01:29,597 --> 01:01:31,589
Have you ever?
846
01:01:32,433 --> 01:01:33,719
Never.
847
01:01:34,727 --> 01:01:38,061
Excuse me, guys. Wyatt, your grandparents are downstairs.
848
01:01:38,189 --> 01:01:39,771
OK. Thanks, Lis.
849
01:01:44,028 --> 01:01:45,940
- Lisa! - Yes?
850
01:01:46,072 --> 01:01:48,109
Where are my grandparents?
851
01:01:48,700 --> 01:01:51,784
- Wyatt, your kitchen is blue. - You want to try one?
852
01:01:51,911 --> 01:01:53,777
Where are my grandparents, Lisa?
853
01:01:53,913 --> 01:01:56,121
They're all taken care of, OK?
854
01:02:03,172 --> 01:02:05,414
You're going to love this one.
855
01:02:11,222 --> 01:02:13,635
- Are they all right? - They're fine.
856
01:02:13,766 --> 01:02:18,477
In fact, they're better than fine. They're not aging anymore.
857
01:02:19,188 --> 01:02:20,975
See? They're smiling.
858
01:02:22,692 --> 01:02:25,230
Uh... Lisa, if any more of his relatives drop by,
859
01:02:25,361 --> 01:02:28,069
we'll be upstairs in the bathroom, OK?
860
01:02:28,197 --> 01:02:30,189
That's pretty sick, Lis.
861
01:02:30,658 --> 01:02:34,026
Those guys really need some self-confidence.
862
01:02:35,163 --> 01:02:40,500
A challenge. Something that'll bring out their inner strength and courage.
863
01:02:45,381 --> 01:02:47,418
I'm so bloody clever.
864
01:02:50,845 --> 01:02:52,131
Now!
865
01:03:40,645 --> 01:03:42,682
This Bud's for you.
866
01:03:50,405 --> 01:03:52,943
- This party's lame, Max. - What about the girls?
867
01:03:54,617 --> 01:03:56,609
Girls, shmirls!
868
01:04:17,473 --> 01:04:20,932
Lisa! What's going on?
869
01:04:22,103 --> 01:04:23,560
Aargh!
870
01:04:41,164 --> 01:04:43,531
Gary! Gary, Gary...
871
01:04:43,666 --> 01:04:45,453
Gary, listen to me.
872
01:04:45,585 --> 01:04:48,453
There are motorcycles in my house!
873
01:04:49,881 --> 01:04:52,589
Wyatt, there are killer mutants in your house, OK?
874
01:05:12,737 --> 01:05:15,024
Screw the house.
875
01:05:54,779 --> 01:05:56,145
Guys, you have uninvited guests.
876
01:05:56,280 --> 01:05:58,240
I think you better come out and ask them to leave.
877
01:05:58,366 --> 01:05:59,902
They're getting pretty rowdy.
878
01:06:05,498 --> 01:06:09,162
This is an excellent chance for you to prove your bravery and courage.
879
01:06:09,293 --> 01:06:12,286
Those are outdated concepts, alright? Excuse us.
880
01:06:13,673 --> 01:06:15,960
Don't let John Wayne hear you say that.
881
01:06:16,092 --> 01:06:18,175
The man is dead, Lisa, OK?
882
01:06:20,137 --> 01:06:22,880
Well, so are you, if you don't deal with this situation.
883
01:06:25,434 --> 01:06:27,050
No, thanks.
884
01:06:29,647 --> 01:06:31,764
Gary, do you feel like a chicken?
885
01:06:32,441 --> 01:06:35,650
Wyatt, if I could shoot an egg out my ass right now, I would.
886
01:06:37,947 --> 01:06:42,362
What about all these people? Will they think we're cowards?
887
01:06:43,911 --> 01:06:45,072
I don't know.
888
01:06:45,204 --> 01:06:47,992
Look, we can deal with shame, OK? Death is a much deeper issue.
889
01:07:13,774 --> 01:07:16,482
Uh... we're going to get you guys some drinks.
890
01:07:16,611 --> 01:07:18,443
You look like a Scotch man. You want some...
891
01:07:18,571 --> 01:07:20,608
- We're gonna get some stuff... - Ah!
892
01:07:21,866 --> 01:07:24,904
Is this your party?
893
01:07:26,287 --> 01:07:27,494
Uh...
894
01:07:28,539 --> 01:07:32,704
- Well, yeah kind of. - I don't know if you can call it a party.
895
01:07:32,835 --> 01:07:34,542
It's just a few friends.
896
01:07:34,670 --> 01:07:35,911
How come...
897
01:07:37,506 --> 01:07:41,625
...two unpopular dicks like you
898
01:07:41,761 --> 01:07:43,548
is having a party?
899
01:07:44,221 --> 01:07:47,555
I don't know. I mean, I guess I was just asking myself that very question.
900
01:07:47,683 --> 01:07:50,346
- And I'm like dicks, sometimes... - Look, we're very sorry.
901
01:07:50,978 --> 01:07:54,938
How would you like all your friends here to know...
902
01:07:56,317 --> 01:08:00,106
...that you wear a bra on your head?
903
01:08:08,162 --> 01:08:11,326
Tossed off into any good books lately, have we?
904
01:08:16,253 --> 01:08:19,746
You two can't even take a shower
905
01:08:20,841 --> 01:08:23,709
with a beautiful woman
906
01:08:23,844 --> 01:08:26,587
without wearing your jeans!
907
01:08:35,523 --> 01:08:37,185
You!
908
01:08:37,316 --> 01:08:38,898
Come here!
909
01:08:41,153 --> 01:08:42,610
Now!
910
01:09:01,799 --> 01:09:04,917
- Prepare to die, Wyatt. - Gary, I can't wait to die.
911
01:09:05,052 --> 01:09:07,465
- We are gonna kick... - Ass.
912
01:09:07,596 --> 01:09:10,384
OK. This is war.
913
01:09:10,516 --> 01:09:13,850
Hands off the girls. Let's leave the girls out of this. Hands off.
914
01:09:16,147 --> 01:09:18,730
I said hands off! Now!
915
01:09:29,618 --> 01:09:31,530
Why don't you shut up, bitch?
916
01:09:37,752 --> 01:09:40,665
And as for your ugly ass, let me tell you something.
917
01:09:40,796 --> 01:09:44,335
You don't come into my friend's house with your faggot friends,
918
01:09:44,467 --> 01:09:46,584
driving your motorbikes all over his floors,
919
01:09:46,719 --> 01:09:49,302
breaking windows, making a mess, stinking up the place.
920
01:09:49,430 --> 01:09:50,921
And believe me, you do stink.
921
01:09:55,561 --> 01:09:57,928
And here's what's gonna happen.
922
01:09:58,063 --> 01:09:59,725
You're gonna let go of the girls,
923
01:09:59,857 --> 01:10:03,225
and you're going to apologize to all these people.
924
01:10:03,360 --> 01:10:07,570
And you're gonna get on your bikes and pedal your ugly asses out of here.
925
01:10:10,868 --> 01:10:14,327
So now, we're gentlemen, so we're gonna give you a choice.
926
01:10:14,914 --> 01:10:17,031
Yeah, you can leave in peace...
927
01:10:21,420 --> 01:10:23,958
Or you can stay and die.
928
01:10:35,601 --> 01:10:37,308
Choice is yours.
929
01:11:16,559 --> 01:11:17,970
Get out of here.
930
01:11:23,315 --> 01:11:26,058
Beg your pardon. You have a lovely home.
931
01:11:27,111 --> 01:11:30,855
Terribly sorry. Call me. We'll have lunch.
932
01:11:30,990 --> 01:11:33,198
Can we keep this between us?
933
01:11:34,994 --> 01:11:37,407
I'd hate to lose my teaching job.
934
01:11:42,251 --> 01:11:43,662
God bless you.
935
01:11:54,889 --> 01:11:58,473
I can't believe... You know... Is everyone alright? I just want to know.
936
01:11:58,601 --> 01:12:00,684
This is so exciting. You know, we're heroes.
937
01:12:00,811 --> 01:12:03,144
These guys came into your house and we showed them down.
938
01:12:03,272 --> 01:12:06,765
I can't believe this. Know what we did? You and me saved all these people, Wyatt.
939
01:12:06,901 --> 01:12:08,642
You don't understand that. We're heroes.
940
01:12:08,777 --> 01:12:11,617
This could mean a guest shot on Phil Donahue. But this is exciting, man!
941
01:12:11,697 --> 01:12:12,904
- Gary! - What?
942
01:12:13,032 --> 01:12:16,400
- Where the hell did you get that thing? - Squirt gun, man. That's it.
943
01:12:27,338 --> 01:12:29,170
That's my boys.
944
01:12:40,434 --> 01:12:42,426
What a weird night, huh?
945
01:12:44,897 --> 01:12:47,435
You really weren't afraid of those guys?
946
01:12:50,527 --> 01:12:54,521
I was scared. But what could I do?
947
01:13:02,456 --> 01:13:06,791
It's probably a good idea for me not to ask too many questions about tonight.
948
01:13:06,919 --> 01:13:08,376
Probably.
949
01:13:08,504 --> 01:13:10,996
This is a sort of a night of weird shit.
950
01:13:11,131 --> 01:13:15,091
I was wondering if I can ask you something kind of strange?
951
01:13:20,849 --> 01:13:22,681
Would you kiss me?
952
01:13:25,437 --> 01:13:27,474
What about Ian?
953
01:13:30,567 --> 01:13:32,399
We all make mistakes.
954
01:13:35,447 --> 01:13:37,860
- OK. - OK...
955
01:13:39,660 --> 01:13:41,492
Where do you want it?
956
01:13:44,832 --> 01:13:47,415
Can I ask you a question?
957
01:13:47,543 --> 01:13:48,875
Yeah.
958
01:13:49,878 --> 01:13:51,915
How do you feel about Lisa?
959
01:13:53,090 --> 01:13:54,581
I love her.
960
01:13:56,260 --> 01:13:58,718
That's what I figured.
961
01:13:58,846 --> 01:14:00,257
But, um...
962
01:14:02,683 --> 01:14:05,266
...I mean, it's definitely a different kind of love, you know.
963
01:14:05,394 --> 01:14:08,637
It's... it's more sisterly, you know,
964
01:14:08,772 --> 01:14:10,855
like big sisterly, kind of.
965
01:14:11,859 --> 01:14:13,771
But she's so beautiful.
966
01:14:17,114 --> 01:14:19,106
Yeah, she's really beautiful.
967
01:14:20,409 --> 01:14:22,901
And her body is...
968
01:14:23,037 --> 01:14:24,653
It's gorgeous.
969
01:14:25,748 --> 01:14:27,580
It's a nice figure.
970
01:14:28,709 --> 01:14:29,950
So...
971
01:14:32,880 --> 01:14:35,623
I mean, what would I be compared to her?
972
01:14:36,550 --> 01:14:42,387
Deb, Lisa is everything I ever wanted in a girl...
973
01:14:44,266 --> 01:14:46,929
...before I knew what I wanted.
974
01:14:47,061 --> 01:14:52,273
I know that if I could do it again... I'd make her just like you.
975
01:14:55,861 --> 01:14:57,318
Honest.
976
01:15:06,330 --> 01:15:09,573
Dead honest. I'm like... I... You know, I...
977
01:15:09,708 --> 01:15:11,519
I gotta tell you cos I'm really honest when I say that.
978
01:15:11,543 --> 01:15:14,377
I'm so very honest. I mean that.
979
01:16:05,639 --> 01:16:07,301
What the hell?
980
01:16:09,768 --> 01:16:13,352
That little bastard. That little...
981
01:16:14,565 --> 01:16:16,898
Please don't let him have messed up my room.
982
01:16:17,025 --> 01:16:19,358
If my room's OK, I won't kill him, I promise.
983
01:16:19,486 --> 01:16:21,648
I'll just hurt him real bad.
984
01:16:50,767 --> 01:16:52,178
Freeze.
985
01:16:53,937 --> 01:16:55,178
Chet!
986
01:16:55,772 --> 01:16:58,059
Where's my brother?
987
01:16:58,192 --> 01:16:59,524
Ow!
988
01:17:00,485 --> 01:17:03,023
Uhh... I don't know.
989
01:17:04,364 --> 01:17:06,196
You're dead meat, pilgrim.
990
01:17:08,577 --> 01:17:10,739
Um...
991
01:17:10,871 --> 01:17:13,614
Chet, Chet, Chet, Chet, Chet, that's her nose. Come on.
992
01:17:13,749 --> 01:17:15,490
Now, look, she has nothing to do with it.
993
01:17:15,626 --> 01:17:18,915
OK. You die.
994
01:17:19,046 --> 01:17:21,709
She walks out of here with a severe limp.
995
01:17:27,721 --> 01:17:28,802
Aargh.
996
01:17:29,806 --> 01:17:31,422
I'll be back.
997
01:17:36,438 --> 01:17:40,808
That's Wyatt's older brother, Chet. He's kind of an asshole.
998
01:17:43,862 --> 01:17:45,603
Oh, hi, Chet.
999
01:17:45,739 --> 01:17:48,982
What the hell is going on around here?
1000
01:17:49,117 --> 01:17:51,029
Chet, I'm sorry, it was an accident.
1001
01:17:51,161 --> 01:17:53,403
An accident? An accident?
1002
01:17:54,248 --> 01:17:57,867
Do you realize it's snowing in my room, goddamn it?
1003
01:17:58,669 --> 01:18:00,772
Some real weird shit happened, Chet. Some real weird...
1004
01:18:00,796 --> 01:18:04,585
You don't have to be a genius to figure that out, monkey dick.
1005
01:18:06,510 --> 01:18:10,379
- Start talking, little man. - Look, Chet, it's a real long story.
1006
01:18:10,514 --> 01:18:12,492
Gary and I were messing around with the computer Friday night,
1007
01:18:12,516 --> 01:18:15,245
and we decided to make a woman, and she went crazy and messed up the house.
1008
01:18:15,269 --> 01:18:18,228
Don't smart-mouth me, you wormy little shit!
1009
01:18:18,355 --> 01:18:19,812
Why don't you just leave him alone?
1010
01:18:19,940 --> 01:18:22,398
Stay out of this, bimbo. This is a family matter.
1011
01:18:22,526 --> 01:18:26,270
Chet, just let me find Lisa. She can explain everything.
1012
01:18:26,405 --> 01:18:29,648
She'll clear everything up, Chet. I swear. Chet.
1013
01:18:29,783 --> 01:18:34,323
You can have my college money and my social security, Chet.
1014
01:18:35,789 --> 01:18:37,655
Chet...
1015
01:18:39,918 --> 01:18:44,003
So, you guys think you can pull one over on me, huh?
1016
01:18:44,131 --> 01:18:45,463
Huh?
1017
01:18:45,590 --> 01:18:49,300
You got everybody synched to the same bullshit story.
1018
01:18:49,428 --> 01:18:52,887
This isn't bullshit. This is a Pershing missile, Chip.
1019
01:18:53,015 --> 01:18:54,847
It's Chet.
1020
01:18:55,350 --> 01:18:56,966
My name is Chet.
1021
01:18:58,937 --> 01:19:01,896
And I didn't think it was a whale's dick, honey.
1022
01:19:05,777 --> 01:19:07,769
Hi, Nanny. Hi, Grampy.
1023
01:19:09,740 --> 01:19:12,107
I'm not a moron, you know. I...
1024
01:19:15,996 --> 01:19:17,658
Was that my grandparents?
1025
01:19:23,378 --> 01:19:26,712
- Are they dead? - Oh, no, they're just resting.
1026
01:19:26,840 --> 01:19:29,253
What are they doing in here?
1027
01:19:29,384 --> 01:19:31,671
I put them in there.
1028
01:19:31,803 --> 01:19:34,511
I didn't want the boys to get into trouble.
1029
01:19:35,182 --> 01:19:38,391
And quite frankly, they weren't having a very good time at the party.
1030
01:19:38,518 --> 01:19:40,259
Not having a good time?
1031
01:19:40,395 --> 01:19:43,979
Do you think they're having a good time being catatonic in a closet?
1032
01:19:45,609 --> 01:19:49,979
Do you have any idea how disrespectful that is?
1033
01:19:50,989 --> 01:19:55,609
Boy, I wouldn't give a squirt of piss for your ass right now.
1034
01:20:01,083 --> 01:20:04,076
OK, that's quite enough. You guys get the girls home.
1035
01:20:04,211 --> 01:20:08,376
Wyatt, take the Porsche. Gary, you take the Ferrari.
1036
01:20:08,507 --> 01:20:09,748
The Ferrari?
1037
01:20:10,926 --> 01:20:12,918
I want to be alone with Chet here.
1038
01:20:13,053 --> 01:20:15,090
- Good to see you again, Chet. - Get out of here!
1039
01:20:15,222 --> 01:20:17,214
Come on, take your little hussies home!
1040
01:20:17,349 --> 01:20:20,012
Their parents are probably worried sick.
1041
01:20:22,562 --> 01:20:27,808
Lady, I want to get to the bottom of this, A.S.A.F.P.
1042
01:20:27,943 --> 01:20:29,775
Oh, so do I.
1043
01:20:32,072 --> 01:20:35,611
But first, I'd like to... butter your muffin.
1044
01:20:35,742 --> 01:20:37,734
Why do you have to be such a wanker?
1045
01:20:37,869 --> 01:20:39,906
Because I get off on it.
1046
01:20:40,038 --> 01:20:44,157
Now I want you to promise that you'll keep your big mouth shut
1047
01:20:44,292 --> 01:20:46,909
about everything that has happened here this weekend.
1048
01:20:47,045 --> 01:20:50,709
And I want you to treat Wyatt and Gary with dignity and respect.
1049
01:20:50,841 --> 01:20:52,628
Oh, really?
1050
01:20:52,759 --> 01:20:54,500
Yeah. Oh, really.
1051
01:20:56,263 --> 01:21:02,180
I can be a real serious bitch if I don't get what I want.
1052
01:21:02,310 --> 01:21:06,054
Ooh, hit me with your best shot.
1053
01:21:11,903 --> 01:21:13,986
How fast are you going?
1054
01:21:14,114 --> 01:21:15,605
About 35.
1055
01:21:27,335 --> 01:21:31,124
- Wait. This can't be right. - Are you looking at the RPMs?
1056
01:21:31,256 --> 01:21:34,545
No, I think I'm looking at about fifty tickets.
1057
01:21:50,025 --> 01:21:51,436
Bye!
1058
01:22:21,932 --> 01:22:23,764
Goddamn train!
1059
01:22:23,892 --> 01:22:26,134
Oh, my. Phew!
1060
01:22:27,062 --> 01:22:28,974
That was great!
1061
01:22:37,989 --> 01:22:39,400
You son of a bitch!
1062
01:22:39,533 --> 01:22:43,152
Al! Al! Al, that was Gary!
1063
01:22:43,286 --> 01:22:45,824
Who is this Gary character?
1064
01:22:48,625 --> 01:22:51,117
I had a really great time last night.
1065
01:22:52,629 --> 01:22:56,168
I'll probably be grounded for a month or so, but...
1066
01:22:57,926 --> 01:22:59,542
I'll wait for you.
1067
01:23:35,255 --> 01:23:37,087
Hilly!
1068
01:23:37,215 --> 01:23:38,831
I love you!
1069
01:23:46,182 --> 01:23:47,798
Alright!
1070
01:23:53,189 --> 01:23:55,055
I want to thank you for a great night.
1071
01:23:55,191 --> 01:23:56,602
Same here.
1072
01:23:59,029 --> 01:24:01,271
Deb, I have kind of a confession to make.
1073
01:24:05,452 --> 01:24:07,535
I'm really not this cool.
1074
01:24:09,080 --> 01:24:11,117
That's not my car.
1075
01:24:11,249 --> 01:24:13,662
This is not my suit.
1076
01:24:13,793 --> 01:24:16,410
I mean, none of those people were my friends.
1077
01:24:17,505 --> 01:24:19,918
Why are you telling me all of this?
1078
01:24:21,885 --> 01:24:24,628
Because I want you to like me for what I am.
1079
01:24:24,763 --> 01:24:27,221
Whatever you are, I like it.
1080
01:24:47,243 --> 01:24:51,032
Well, um, I'd better get going, cos, um...
1081
01:24:52,540 --> 01:24:54,577
...Wyatt and I still have to deal with Chet.
1082
01:24:54,709 --> 01:24:56,746
Quit screwing around!
1083
01:24:56,878 --> 01:24:59,871
This ain't funny, you stupid bitch!
1084
01:25:00,006 --> 01:25:02,919
Oh, now careful, Chet. Don't make me angry.
1085
01:25:03,051 --> 01:25:04,383
Sorry.
1086
01:25:07,764 --> 01:25:09,596
That's better.
1087
01:25:09,724 --> 01:25:13,183
Would you please turn me back to normal, please?
1088
01:25:13,311 --> 01:25:15,803
I haven't done anything to you.
1089
01:25:15,939 --> 01:25:18,352
No, but you've done plenty to your brother.
1090
01:25:18,483 --> 01:25:21,851
- Like what? - Well, let me see...
1091
01:25:21,986 --> 01:25:25,024
You've nagged him, harassed him, suppressed him,
1092
01:25:25,156 --> 01:25:28,194
kept him in fear of you, extorted money from him.
1093
01:25:28,326 --> 01:25:30,409
It's done out of love.
1094
01:25:31,079 --> 01:25:34,368
Just for that, I ought to give you a set of elephant balls.
1095
01:25:40,547 --> 01:25:44,541
Give me your word that you'll leave Wyatt and Gary alone,
1096
01:25:44,676 --> 01:25:46,292
and I'll change you back.
1097
01:25:46,428 --> 01:25:49,011
Oh, all right.
1098
01:25:49,139 --> 01:25:51,131
Shake on it, huh?
1099
01:25:53,351 --> 01:25:55,718
No, thanks. I'd rather not.
1100
01:25:56,855 --> 01:25:58,812
Wait! Where are you going?
1101
01:25:59,858 --> 01:26:02,100
Well, I have to go and get changed.
1102
01:26:02,235 --> 01:26:04,852
- What about me? - What about you? You'll be fine.
1103
01:26:04,988 --> 01:26:07,526
It just takes a little while for the effect to wear off, OK?
1104
01:26:20,003 --> 01:26:21,164
Well?
1105
01:26:22,464 --> 01:26:24,296
I'm in love.
1106
01:26:24,424 --> 01:26:27,132
- It's great, isn't it? - The best.
1107
01:26:27,260 --> 01:26:29,798
You know, I'll tell you, Wyatt,
1108
01:26:29,929 --> 01:26:31,886
I think things are turning around for us.
1109
01:26:32,015 --> 01:26:33,426
I mean it.
1110
01:26:33,558 --> 01:26:35,641
OK, what about Lisa?
1111
01:26:39,397 --> 01:26:41,557
Well, I think we're gonna have to have a talk with her.
1112
01:26:43,401 --> 01:26:45,142
Think she'll understand?
1113
01:26:46,196 --> 01:26:48,813
I think so. I mean, uh...
1114
01:26:48,948 --> 01:26:51,486
I sure as hell wouldn't want to date you.
1115
01:26:53,203 --> 01:26:55,536
You're not my type, you know.
1116
01:27:01,711 --> 01:27:03,327
Chet?
1117
01:27:04,255 --> 01:27:05,462
Chet?
1118
01:27:07,342 --> 01:27:08,753
Hi, dudes!
1119
01:27:13,014 --> 01:27:15,176
I'm sorry, Wyatt.
1120
01:27:15,308 --> 01:27:18,676
I'm sorry for being such a shit to you all these years.
1121
01:27:19,395 --> 01:27:22,479
And, gee, well, I want you to know that...
1122
01:27:23,775 --> 01:27:25,482
...I love you.
1123
01:27:30,406 --> 01:27:32,398
That's nasty, Wyatt.
1124
01:27:33,284 --> 01:27:35,276
That's Chet, Gary.
1125
01:27:36,788 --> 01:27:38,825
Hey, hey, huh...
1126
01:27:44,879 --> 01:27:46,120
Hmm!
1127
01:27:47,966 --> 01:27:49,423
Oh, my God!
1128
01:27:52,345 --> 01:27:53,881
Lisa?
1129
01:27:54,013 --> 01:27:55,595
In here!
1130
01:27:55,723 --> 01:27:58,056
- Lisa? - Yeah?
1131
01:27:59,060 --> 01:28:02,269
- You saw Chet? - Yes, I did.
1132
01:28:02,397 --> 01:28:04,389
You responsible?
1133
01:28:05,483 --> 01:28:06,894
Yes, I am.
1134
01:28:07,026 --> 01:28:09,234
Lisa, we can't have him like that.
1135
01:28:10,738 --> 01:28:12,775
It'd ruin Christmas.
1136
01:28:14,158 --> 01:28:16,400
Listen, he's gonna be fine in half an hour.
1137
01:28:16,536 --> 01:28:19,745
He's not going to spoil Christmas.
1138
01:28:19,873 --> 01:28:23,082
And he's not going to bug you anymore, either.
1139
01:28:23,209 --> 01:28:25,041
Um...
1140
01:28:25,920 --> 01:28:29,004
Lisa, we have to have a talk with you.
1141
01:28:29,132 --> 01:28:31,340
What's on your mind?
1142
01:28:32,135 --> 01:28:35,094
I really don't know how to say this to you.
1143
01:28:35,763 --> 01:28:37,846
You guys found girlfriends, right?
1144
01:28:40,268 --> 01:28:44,057
Fell in love with the two girls, and they fell in love with you.
1145
01:28:45,064 --> 01:28:47,477
That's all I ever wanted for you.
1146
01:28:48,484 --> 01:28:50,066
You're not hurt?
1147
01:28:51,654 --> 01:28:53,862
Yeah, sure I'm hurt.
1148
01:28:54,699 --> 01:28:57,157
But I wouldn't change it.
1149
01:28:58,912 --> 01:29:03,156
I'm really just getting off seeing you two guys straightened out.
1150
01:29:12,717 --> 01:29:14,709
I have to go.
1151
01:29:31,277 --> 01:29:32,643
Oh...
1152
01:29:33,655 --> 01:29:35,738
I've had a wonderful time.
1153
01:29:46,292 --> 01:29:47,954
Lisa...
1154
01:29:50,505 --> 01:29:51,916
Bye.
1155
01:31:09,917 --> 01:31:11,328
Boys?
1156
01:31:12,336 --> 01:31:13,918
We're home!
1157
01:31:18,885 --> 01:31:22,344
- Hi, Mr. Donnelly. How are you? - Hi, honey.
1158
01:31:22,930 --> 01:31:25,593
- Dad, hi. - No, no, no, no. Like a man.
1159
01:31:26,559 --> 01:31:29,893
So, what did you guys do this weekend?
1160
01:31:30,021 --> 01:31:33,105
- Not much. - Just hung around the house, you know.
1161
01:31:33,232 --> 01:31:35,224
Daddy had this crazy notion
1162
01:31:35,359 --> 01:31:38,943
you guys might throw a party or do something nutty.
1163
01:31:39,072 --> 01:31:40,734
- Ha-ha! - Shit.
1164
01:31:40,865 --> 01:31:42,276
- Not us. - Not here.
1165
01:31:42,408 --> 01:31:43,694
No way.
1166
01:32:05,807 --> 01:32:07,298
Shh, shh!
1167
01:32:28,329 --> 01:32:32,699
OK... drop and give me twenty.
1168
01:32:37,296 --> 01:32:39,959
♪She's alive!
1169
01:32:40,091 --> 01:32:42,378
- ♪Alive! - ♪Weird science
1170
01:32:48,182 --> 01:32:50,390
♪Weird science
1171
01:32:50,518 --> 01:32:52,601
♪Plastic tubes and pots and pans
1172
01:32:52,728 --> 01:32:55,095
♪Bits and pieces and magic from my hand
1173
01:32:55,231 --> 01:32:58,099
- ♪We're making weird science - ♪Ooh!
1174
01:32:58,234 --> 01:33:00,021
♪Plastic tubes and pots and pans
1175
01:33:00,153 --> 01:33:03,317
♪Bits and pieces and bits and pieces and bits...
1176
01:33:03,447 --> 01:33:05,188
♪My creation
1177
01:33:05,324 --> 01:33:06,906
♪Is it real?
1178
01:33:07,034 --> 01:33:09,993
♪It's my creation, Ooh, my creation
1179
01:33:10,121 --> 01:33:11,953
♪It's my creation...
1180
01:33:25,678 --> 01:33:27,089
♪Weird!
1181
01:33:27,722 --> 01:33:29,179
♪Ooh!
1182
01:33:33,436 --> 01:33:35,644
- ♪Weird science - ♪Ooh!
1183
01:33:35,771 --> 01:33:37,603
♪Magic and technology
1184
01:33:37,732 --> 01:33:40,190
♪Voodoo dolls and chants, electricity
1185
01:33:40,318 --> 01:33:42,526
♪We're making weird science
1186
01:33:43,237 --> 01:33:45,069
♪Fantasy and microchips
1187
01:33:45,198 --> 01:33:48,282
♪Bits and pieces and bits and pieces and bits...
1188
01:33:48,409 --> 01:33:50,071
♪My creation
1189
01:33:50,203 --> 01:33:51,944
♪Is it real?
1190
01:33:52,079 --> 01:33:55,538
♪It's my creation, I do not know
1191
01:33:55,666 --> 01:33:57,328
♪No hesitation
1192
01:33:57,460 --> 01:33:59,417
♪No heart of gold
1193
01:33:59,545 --> 01:34:01,252
♪Just flesh and blood
1194
01:34:01,380 --> 01:34:03,713
♪I do not know, I do not know!
1195
01:34:03,841 --> 01:34:05,753
♪From my heart and from my hand
1196
01:34:05,885 --> 01:34:09,128
♪Why don't people understand my intentions?
1197
01:34:10,514 --> 01:34:13,507
♪Ooh! Weird science
1198
01:34:13,643 --> 01:34:16,681
♪Ooh! Ooh!
1199
01:34:19,315 --> 01:34:21,648
♪Weird science
1200
01:34:21,776 --> 01:34:23,563
♪Magic and technology
1201
01:34:23,694 --> 01:34:25,560
♪Voodoo dolls and chants
1202
01:34:26,781 --> 01:34:29,068
♪Weird science
1203
01:34:29,200 --> 01:34:31,066
♪Things we've never seen before
1204
01:34:31,202 --> 01:34:32,864
♪Behind bolted doors
1205
01:34:32,995 --> 01:34:36,033
♪Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Weird science
1206
01:34:36,165 --> 01:34:37,622
♪Ooh!
1207
01:34:41,545 --> 01:34:42,877
♪Weird!
1208
01:34:49,345 --> 01:34:51,052
♪Weird science
1209
01:34:56,602 --> 01:34:58,594
♪Weird science
1210
01:34:58,729 --> 01:35:00,971
♪Ooh! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!
1211
01:35:01,107 --> 01:35:04,396
♪Bits and pieces, Bits and pieces
1212
01:35:04,527 --> 01:35:06,393
♪Weird science
1213
01:35:15,621 --> 01:35:17,453
♪My creation
1214
01:35:17,581 --> 01:35:19,163
♪Is it real?
1215
01:35:19,292 --> 01:35:22,660
♪It's my creation, I do not know
1216
01:35:22,795 --> 01:35:24,878
♪Ooh, my creation
1217
01:35:25,006 --> 01:35:26,588
♪Is it real?
1218
01:35:26,716 --> 01:35:29,754
♪Just flesh and blood, Just flesh and blood
1219
01:35:29,885 --> 01:35:31,842
♪Just flesh and blood
1220
01:35:48,404 --> 01:35:50,987
- ♪Weird science - ♪Weird science
1221
01:35:54,076 --> 01:35:56,534
- ♪Weird science - ♪Weird science
1222
01:35:59,707 --> 01:36:02,370
- ♪Weird science - ♪Weird science
1223
01:36:03,544 --> 01:36:06,753
♪Weird, weird, weird, weird science... ♪
91831
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