All language subtitles for iGirlfriend.2018.HDRip.XviD.AC3-EVO-resync

af Afrikaans
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bn Bengali
bs Bosnian
bg Bulgarian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French Download
fy Frisian
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
km Khmer
ko Korean
ku Kurdish (Kurmanji)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Lao
la Latin
lv Latvian
lt Lithuanian
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
ne Nepali
no Norwegian
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt Portuguese
pa Punjabi
ro Romanian
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
st Sesotho
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhala
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
te Telugu
th Thai
tr Turkish
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
or Odia (Oriya)
rw Kinyarwanda
tk Turkmen
tt Tatar
ug Uyghur
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:13,657 --> 00:00:18,657 Subtitles by explosiveskull 2 00:01:06,874 --> 00:01:08,673 OK, what were we supposed to do? 3 00:01:08,675 --> 00:01:09,541 Kill her? 4 00:01:15,582 --> 00:01:17,352 Oh man. 5 00:01:18,386 --> 00:01:20,551 I can't believe I'm here with you right now. 6 00:01:20,553 --> 00:01:22,290 Going to school before school starts. 7 00:01:22,856 --> 00:01:24,122 You're such a dweeb, dude. 8 00:01:24,124 --> 00:01:27,162 And worse than that, I think it's rubbing off on me. 9 00:01:27,594 --> 00:01:28,660 Dude, chill out. 10 00:01:28,662 --> 00:01:30,762 This is going to take like two seconds. 11 00:01:30,764 --> 00:01:32,764 I'm not even part of your gay little club, dude. 12 00:01:32,766 --> 00:01:34,833 I really wish you would have told me 13 00:01:34,835 --> 00:01:36,704 that you were doing this today before inviting me over. 14 00:01:37,371 --> 00:01:38,437 I didn't invite you. 15 00:01:38,439 --> 00:01:39,204 You just showed up. 16 00:01:39,206 --> 00:01:40,339 Still, false advertising. 17 00:01:46,446 --> 00:01:48,749 Hey, Sammy. 18 00:01:49,416 --> 00:01:50,315 Where is everyone? 19 00:01:51,186 --> 00:01:52,717 Look, this isn't a team meeting. 20 00:01:52,719 --> 00:01:53,719 So let's get right to it. 21 00:01:53,721 --> 00:01:56,190 Have you seen this? 22 00:01:56,790 --> 00:01:58,425 Everyone has seen this video. 23 00:01:59,359 --> 00:02:00,592 This is like Chernobyl bad. 24 00:02:00,594 --> 00:02:01,993 Who the hell is Chernobyl? 25 00:02:01,995 --> 00:02:04,898 I like to think I created a certain standard for this group 26 00:02:05,799 --> 00:02:07,633 that you just no longer live up to. 27 00:02:07,635 --> 00:02:09,468 And so Simon, you're out of FMSDA. 28 00:02:09,470 --> 00:02:10,702 I'm going to need your jump drive 29 00:02:10,704 --> 00:02:12,472 and your computer lab key card back. 30 00:02:15,709 --> 00:02:17,778 I'm prepared to hear you defend yourself and make 31 00:02:18,879 --> 00:02:21,349 me understand why you deserve to stay in FMSDA. 32 00:02:26,519 --> 00:02:28,356 Rip a whole new asshole dude. 33 00:02:31,758 --> 00:02:32,859 Whatever. 34 00:02:33,393 --> 00:02:35,329 I'm sorry. 35 00:02:35,696 --> 00:02:36,730 Compelling. 36 00:02:37,998 --> 00:02:41,236 One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. 37 00:02:41,768 --> 00:02:43,569 One, two, three, four... 38 00:02:43,571 --> 00:02:45,240 This ain't your avenue, man. 39 00:02:45,905 --> 00:02:47,304 Would you just shut your mouth? 40 00:02:47,306 --> 00:02:49,974 Every time you open your mouth, you just make things worse. 41 00:02:49,976 --> 00:02:52,779 Dude, we are going to kick this school's ass this year, man. 42 00:02:53,079 --> 00:02:53,812 Oh man. 43 00:02:53,814 --> 00:02:55,316 Oh shit, lacrosse team. 44 00:02:55,916 --> 00:02:57,918 Hide, hide, hide, hide, hide. 45 00:03:03,823 --> 00:03:05,493 There's that son of a bitch. 46 00:03:06,060 --> 00:03:07,395 Bbashrethedorf. 47 00:03:07,862 --> 00:03:08,996 Oh, that's Desiree. 48 00:03:12,066 --> 00:03:15,436 I cannot not understand what she sees in that douche bag. 49 00:03:21,475 --> 00:03:22,440 What was that? 50 00:03:22,442 --> 00:03:23,474 No one. 51 00:03:23,476 --> 00:03:24,276 You were looking at her, weren't you. 52 00:03:24,278 --> 00:03:30,917 Bashrethedorf. 53 00:03:31,719 --> 00:03:32,850 Honey, I know what I'm doing. 54 00:03:32,852 --> 00:03:34,685 You obviously don't. 55 00:03:34,687 --> 00:03:37,655 Anyone who comes to the door can see inside the house now. 56 00:03:37,657 --> 00:03:39,491 The TV part supposed to go on the inside. 57 00:03:39,493 --> 00:03:41,125 The TV part, would you listen to yourself? 58 00:03:41,127 --> 00:03:43,494 The monitor is on the inside of the house, 59 00:03:43,496 --> 00:03:45,963 then how is any going to know that we have a video intercom. 60 00:03:45,965 --> 00:03:48,302 Why does anyone have to know that we have a video intercom? 61 00:03:49,436 --> 00:03:54,341 Because if I'm going to spend $537.51 on something, 62 00:03:55,442 --> 00:03:57,377 I don't want to have to hide it from my neighbors. 63 00:03:57,710 --> 00:04:00,013 I can't. 64 00:04:06,821 --> 00:04:07,855 How's it going, Dad? 65 00:04:08,456 --> 00:04:09,455 Oh, you know. 66 00:04:09,457 --> 00:04:10,722 I can't complain. 67 00:04:10,724 --> 00:04:12,893 So how's school going? 68 00:04:13,726 --> 00:04:15,962 School hasn't started yet, Dad. 69 00:04:16,764 --> 00:04:18,099 But it was a pretty rough day. 70 00:04:18,666 --> 00:04:19,498 Good, good. 71 00:04:19,500 --> 00:04:20,698 Just keep it up. 72 00:04:32,579 --> 00:04:35,015 You know, I heard Ahmad even got a girl from this summer. 73 00:04:39,486 --> 00:04:41,022 I'm sick of this shit. 74 00:04:41,688 --> 00:04:42,787 That was my iPad. 75 00:04:42,789 --> 00:04:44,358 I'm sick of being a loser, man. 76 00:04:44,757 --> 00:04:46,056 I've had it. 77 00:04:46,058 --> 00:04:47,892 Guys like Bashly get all the girls, and what do we get? 78 00:04:47,894 --> 00:04:49,029 Pantsed on YouTube. 79 00:04:49,630 --> 00:04:51,365 Yeah, I know. 80 00:04:51,731 --> 00:04:53,130 Wait, Ahmad? 81 00:04:53,132 --> 00:04:55,902 The spoiled little Indian kid from your iPhone club thingy. 82 00:04:56,769 --> 00:04:57,935 OK, first of all, that's racist. 83 00:04:57,937 --> 00:04:59,171 I don't see how that's racist. 84 00:04:59,173 --> 00:05:01,539 He's from India and he's a squirrly looking fella. 85 00:05:01,541 --> 00:05:02,376 Well, yeah. 86 00:05:02,642 --> 00:05:03,842 Him. 87 00:05:03,844 --> 00:05:06,514 How did that little dude get a girl to date him? 88 00:05:07,046 --> 00:05:08,380 Dude probably made it up. 89 00:05:08,382 --> 00:05:10,649 No, I've seen pictures of them together and everything. 90 00:05:10,651 --> 00:05:11,782 So, it's easy to fake that. 91 00:05:16,524 --> 00:05:19,060 You know, it actually is really easy to fake. 92 00:05:20,060 --> 00:05:21,629 We're going to make ourselves girlfriends. 93 00:05:22,096 --> 00:05:22,661 No, no. 94 00:05:22,663 --> 00:05:23,794 That's creepy. 95 00:05:23,796 --> 00:05:25,531 That's beyond creepy. 96 00:05:25,533 --> 00:05:26,964 Well dude, I hate to break it to you, 97 00:05:26,966 --> 00:05:27,798 but we're kind of pathetic and creepy already. 98 00:05:27,800 --> 00:05:28,799 Deal with it. 99 00:05:28,801 --> 00:05:29,433 People would see right through that. 100 00:05:29,435 --> 00:05:30,501 No they wouldn't. 101 00:05:30,503 --> 00:05:31,236 You're like an idiot savant computer guy. 102 00:05:31,238 --> 00:05:34,041 Just make it do things. 103 00:05:34,642 --> 00:05:35,875 Make it work. 104 00:05:35,877 --> 00:05:37,943 There is no way that I'm going to sit here and make 105 00:05:37,945 --> 00:05:39,447 a girlfriend on my computer. 106 00:05:40,014 --> 00:05:41,212 It doesn't work that way. 107 00:05:41,214 --> 00:05:44,084 You know, just think about all the opportunities 108 00:05:45,084 --> 00:05:46,383 that this little computer could give us. 109 00:05:46,385 --> 00:05:49,020 Just think about all the stupid app shit that you make. 110 00:05:49,022 --> 00:05:50,055 Don't call it stupid. 111 00:05:50,057 --> 00:05:51,089 All that really interesting app stuff 112 00:05:51,091 --> 00:05:53,058 you make, why don't you just make it, 113 00:05:53,060 --> 00:05:55,930 you know, interestinger, like with boobies. 114 00:05:56,764 --> 00:05:58,633 Think about the boobies, Simon. 115 00:05:59,166 --> 00:06:00,332 Think about the boobies. 116 00:06:10,844 --> 00:06:12,109 It's not going to work. 117 00:06:12,111 --> 00:06:14,246 We just post a bunch pictures of us 118 00:06:14,248 --> 00:06:16,517 Photoshopped in with some girls, claiming to be our girlfriends. 119 00:06:17,351 --> 00:06:19,217 People are going to see right through that. 120 00:06:19,219 --> 00:06:20,685 Haven't you seen "Catfish?" 121 00:06:20,687 --> 00:06:21,820 Here me out. 122 00:06:21,822 --> 00:06:23,688 We take different pieces from different girls 123 00:06:23,690 --> 00:06:25,089 on the Internet. 124 00:06:25,091 --> 00:06:26,858 We put them together to make an amalgam of a girl, you know? 125 00:06:26,860 --> 00:06:28,092 It's one that can't be searched. 126 00:06:28,094 --> 00:06:30,128 Different hair from this girl, eyes from this girl, 127 00:06:30,130 --> 00:06:32,033 lips from this girl, tits from that girl, 128 00:06:32,765 --> 00:06:34,099 real Frankenstein shit. 129 00:06:40,640 --> 00:06:42,542 Like, they go to be hot, but they can't be too hot, 130 00:06:42,875 --> 00:06:44,008 you know? 131 00:06:44,010 --> 00:06:46,714 Like, in your case maybe a little bit jerkey. 132 00:06:48,014 --> 00:06:53,553 We hack into Facebook, we go back in time literally 133 00:06:54,288 --> 00:06:55,957 by changing the days on the photos, 134 00:06:56,990 --> 00:06:59,159 and put it in like they've been on for years. 135 00:06:59,692 --> 00:07:00,692 You know? 136 00:07:00,694 --> 00:07:02,196 Like sweet sixteens, family reunions, 137 00:07:03,029 --> 00:07:05,265 quinceaneras and all that shit. 138 00:07:06,300 --> 00:07:08,769 Like, they need to be interactive, you know? 139 00:07:10,003 --> 00:07:12,003 Write an iPhone ad that will text and call us. 140 00:07:40,200 --> 00:07:43,637 What are you going to name yours? 141 00:07:43,937 --> 00:07:45,273 Lilly. 142 00:07:45,938 --> 00:07:48,008 Her name is Lilly. 143 00:08:21,974 --> 00:08:22,741 College girls? 144 00:08:22,743 --> 00:08:23,743 No way. 145 00:08:35,055 --> 00:08:36,487 We now have girlfriends. 146 00:09:09,156 --> 00:09:12,627 Greetings lame dicks. 147 00:09:12,959 --> 00:09:13,491 Stanley. 148 00:09:13,493 --> 00:09:14,293 Whats up? 149 00:09:14,295 --> 00:09:16,130 So, I heard about your GFs. 150 00:09:16,763 --> 00:09:17,295 Oh, did you now? 151 00:09:17,297 --> 00:09:18,130 Yeah, I did. 152 00:09:18,132 --> 00:09:18,831 We haven't even told anybody. 153 00:09:18,833 --> 00:09:20,332 I saw it on Facebook. 154 00:09:20,334 --> 00:09:22,303 Everybody saw it on Facebook. 155 00:09:22,902 --> 00:09:23,869 Well, our girls. 156 00:09:23,871 --> 00:09:24,602 They just had to go tell everybody. 157 00:09:24,604 --> 00:09:26,037 You know how girls are? 158 00:09:26,039 --> 00:09:27,005 Yeah. 159 00:09:27,007 --> 00:09:27,805 They're really into us. 160 00:09:27,807 --> 00:09:28,807 Yeah. 161 00:09:28,809 --> 00:09:29,441 Really into us. 162 00:09:29,443 --> 00:09:30,311 So where are they? 163 00:09:30,978 --> 00:09:31,809 Oh, that's right. 164 00:09:31,811 --> 00:09:32,910 They're college girls, right? 165 00:09:32,912 --> 00:09:33,444 Hm-hm. 166 00:09:33,446 --> 00:09:34,545 Totally. 167 00:09:34,547 --> 00:09:35,713 So why didn't you mention them yesterday? 168 00:09:35,715 --> 00:09:36,515 Well, because you were being a dick yesterday. 169 00:09:36,517 --> 00:09:36,948 What college do they go to? 170 00:09:36,950 --> 00:09:38,850 State. 171 00:09:38,852 --> 00:09:39,417 Where'd you meet them? 172 00:09:39,419 --> 00:09:40,519 Outward bound. 173 00:09:40,521 --> 00:09:41,352 Why is this the first time we heard of it. 174 00:09:41,354 --> 00:09:42,587 Extreme wilderness adventure. 175 00:09:42,589 --> 00:09:44,155 We're only allowed to use technology once per week 176 00:09:44,157 --> 00:09:44,823 and call it... 177 00:09:44,825 --> 00:09:45,289 Where are they from? 178 00:09:45,291 --> 00:09:45,856 Stacey? 179 00:09:45,858 --> 00:09:46,290 Willowsbrooke. 180 00:09:46,292 --> 00:09:46,824 Lilly? 181 00:09:46,826 --> 00:09:47,692 Northbrooke. 182 00:09:47,694 --> 00:09:48,159 Have they met your parents yet? 183 00:09:48,161 --> 00:09:49,895 Not yet. 184 00:09:49,897 --> 00:09:50,828 We're keeping it casual. 185 00:09:50,830 --> 00:09:51,563 How far have you gotten with her? 186 00:09:51,565 --> 00:09:52,063 A gentleman never tells. 187 00:09:52,065 --> 00:09:52,463 Bullshit. 188 00:09:52,465 --> 00:09:55,066 Peg? 189 00:09:55,068 --> 00:09:55,500 Oh, we're boning like rabbits, but like really horny rabbits. 190 00:09:55,502 --> 00:09:55,933 Dude. 191 00:09:55,935 --> 00:09:56,367 What? 192 00:09:56,369 --> 00:09:56,967 Gross. 193 00:09:58,504 --> 00:09:59,706 Oh, lookey here. 194 00:10:00,873 --> 00:10:02,409 Calling me right now, the old ball and chain. 195 00:10:02,910 --> 00:10:03,475 Nice. 196 00:10:03,477 --> 00:10:04,241 Yeah. 197 00:10:04,243 --> 00:10:06,680 Well, see you later, dude. 198 00:10:08,849 --> 00:10:11,218 Mr. Nathaniel Hawthorne working on the emotion 199 00:10:12,352 --> 00:10:15,823 of his protagonist in this work, remembering class 200 00:10:16,824 --> 00:10:21,395 that the protagonist is the main character. 201 00:10:22,461 --> 00:10:26,766 The protagonist faces almost a force of agony 202 00:10:27,267 --> 00:10:28,703 that has befallen him. 203 00:10:29,502 --> 00:10:31,502 I'm sorry about what happened yesterday. 204 00:10:31,504 --> 00:10:34,874 I wanted you to stay on and be on Rusty. 205 00:10:35,209 --> 00:10:36,174 It's OK. 206 00:10:36,176 --> 00:10:37,241 It's really not that big of deal. 207 00:10:37,243 --> 00:10:38,375 It is to me. 208 00:10:38,377 --> 00:10:39,678 I actually wanted to win something this year. 209 00:10:39,680 --> 00:10:42,248 But with you gone, that's pretty much out the window. 210 00:10:43,382 --> 00:10:49,256 Something that you just don't like about yourself. 211 00:10:49,857 --> 00:10:50,690 Well, I have. 212 00:10:51,592 --> 00:10:54,728 Can any of you guess what mine is? 213 00:10:57,864 --> 00:10:59,834 It's my pinky toe. 214 00:11:00,267 --> 00:11:01,401 I can't move it. 215 00:12:35,195 --> 00:12:40,099 Now class, let's quiet down because this is the best part. 216 00:12:56,182 --> 00:12:57,884 Peg. 217 00:12:58,151 --> 00:12:58,618 Hey. 218 00:12:59,151 --> 00:13:01,021 What's up? 219 00:13:01,521 --> 00:13:03,891 Who are you texting? 220 00:13:04,291 --> 00:13:06,392 My girlfriend. 221 00:13:06,660 --> 00:13:07,259 Oh. 222 00:13:07,261 --> 00:13:09,463 What, what, why? 223 00:13:10,030 --> 00:13:10,761 Oh, nothing. 224 00:13:10,763 --> 00:13:12,498 I was just thinking... 225 00:13:12,999 --> 00:13:13,868 nothing. 226 00:13:14,267 --> 00:13:15,102 Thinking what? 227 00:13:18,137 --> 00:13:21,441 Let's talk after class. 228 00:13:22,008 --> 00:13:23,409 Oh, yeah. 229 00:13:24,044 --> 00:13:26,013 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 230 00:13:36,455 --> 00:13:39,026 A lot of butts. 231 00:13:41,427 --> 00:13:42,897 Sorry, guys. 232 00:13:43,430 --> 00:13:45,565 It's my girlfriend, Lilly. 233 00:13:50,436 --> 00:13:52,038 She' really into me. 234 00:13:52,472 --> 00:13:53,941 Well, that's it. 235 00:13:54,775 --> 00:13:57,207 Now, from now on when you enter this class, 236 00:13:57,209 --> 00:13:59,979 you will leave your phones right here in this basket. 237 00:14:01,047 --> 00:14:04,450 And when you leave, you can take them with you. 238 00:14:15,328 --> 00:14:17,164 I thought you were different, Simon. 239 00:14:28,108 --> 00:14:30,074 Dude, I accidentally mixed up the messages. 240 00:14:30,076 --> 00:14:31,644 Stacy go the ones I wrote and Lilly got the ones 241 00:14:32,278 --> 00:14:33,077 that you wrote. 242 00:14:33,079 --> 00:14:34,480 That's some sick stuff man. 243 00:14:34,815 --> 00:14:35,313 I know. 244 00:14:35,315 --> 00:14:36,581 Seriously? 245 00:14:36,583 --> 00:14:37,347 Now, give me your phone. 246 00:14:37,349 --> 00:14:38,348 I want to change it back. 247 00:14:38,350 --> 00:14:39,382 Oh, no way. 248 00:14:39,384 --> 00:14:40,351 No, this just worked on Desiree, dude. 249 00:14:40,353 --> 00:14:41,519 She wants to meet me after class. 250 00:14:41,521 --> 00:14:42,587 I got to go. 251 00:14:42,589 --> 00:14:44,657 I got a semi in my pants. 252 00:14:48,594 --> 00:14:50,596 First period, first fucking day of class and you're 253 00:14:51,363 --> 00:14:52,097 going to be fucking what? 254 00:14:52,099 --> 00:14:52,597 Phone vag? 255 00:14:52,599 --> 00:14:53,597 Language. 256 00:14:53,599 --> 00:14:55,433 My bad Mr. Crowley. 257 00:14:55,435 --> 00:14:57,637 What are you going to do to make it up to me? 258 00:14:58,271 --> 00:14:59,573 Anything you want. 259 00:15:00,239 --> 00:15:01,206 Homework for a week. 260 00:15:01,208 --> 00:15:03,677 Books. 261 00:15:04,210 --> 00:15:05,111 A month. 262 00:15:05,512 --> 00:15:06,512 Jesus Christ. 263 00:15:11,151 --> 00:15:12,149 Come on, Peg. 264 00:15:14,421 --> 00:15:16,991 Don't fuck with my flow or I'm going to punch your face 265 00:15:17,456 --> 00:15:18,456 right in the face. 266 00:15:18,458 --> 00:15:19,491 Vag. 267 00:16:06,339 --> 00:16:07,708 Stupid, pathetic idea. 268 00:16:19,652 --> 00:16:21,721 I wish I could make you real. 269 00:16:32,799 --> 00:16:33,630 Dinner. 270 00:16:40,607 --> 00:16:42,309 Simon, have you been crying? 271 00:16:42,742 --> 00:16:43,473 Yeah. 272 00:16:43,475 --> 00:16:44,741 Why on earth were you... 273 00:16:44,743 --> 00:16:45,976 I had it all wrong, Mom. 274 00:16:45,978 --> 00:16:47,444 I thought it should be a program that's executable, 275 00:16:47,446 --> 00:16:50,414 a robot that would just randomly send out messages I told it to. 276 00:16:50,416 --> 00:16:51,415 But that's not it at all. 277 00:16:51,417 --> 00:16:52,616 You see, it had to think and respond. 278 00:16:52,618 --> 00:16:53,751 If I just work on my algorithm a little bit more 279 00:16:53,753 --> 00:16:56,020 to define the perimeters of what we perceive 280 00:16:56,022 --> 00:16:58,356 as human emotion, then just a few simple responses, 281 00:16:58,358 --> 00:16:59,890 I can feed it information. 282 00:16:59,892 --> 00:17:02,226 Wait, I don't have to feed it information. 283 00:17:02,228 --> 00:17:03,895 As long as it has an internet connection, 284 00:17:03,897 --> 00:17:05,630 it has a brain that has access to all the information 285 00:17:05,632 --> 00:17:06,630 it could ever want. 286 00:17:06,632 --> 00:17:07,599 My algorithm just need to provide it 287 00:17:07,601 --> 00:17:09,766 with access and a filter, that way 288 00:17:09,768 --> 00:17:11,401 it can make decisions and respond 289 00:17:11,403 --> 00:17:12,769 to me based on those decisions. 290 00:17:12,771 --> 00:17:14,639 It's not just a random generator, 291 00:17:14,641 --> 00:17:17,342 it's a program that can actually think and carry 292 00:17:17,344 --> 00:17:20,647 on a conversation like a companion, like a person. 293 00:17:21,314 --> 00:17:22,913 That's nice, dear. 294 00:17:22,915 --> 00:17:24,849 We're definitely going to talk about why 295 00:17:24,851 --> 00:17:26,253 you were crying, though. 296 00:17:26,518 --> 00:17:27,485 Later. 297 00:17:27,487 --> 00:17:28,820 Now, your father and I are leaving 298 00:17:28,822 --> 00:17:30,721 for Aunt Kate's in the morning. 299 00:17:30,723 --> 00:17:32,724 I wrote out a list of chores that you 300 00:17:32,726 --> 00:17:34,958 need to do when we're gone, it's on the chalkboard. 301 00:17:34,960 --> 00:17:37,131 Peg can come by, but he cannot stay past 10. 302 00:17:37,663 --> 00:17:41,801 We'll be back on Sunday. 303 00:17:42,302 --> 00:17:43,333 Simon. 304 00:17:43,335 --> 00:17:44,302 Did you hear me? 305 00:17:44,304 --> 00:17:45,639 Got it, Mom. 306 00:17:46,273 --> 00:17:47,604 I worry about him. 307 00:17:47,606 --> 00:17:49,276 He can't wait to get laid. 308 00:17:49,575 --> 00:17:51,777 Harry. 309 00:17:52,278 --> 00:17:53,277 What? 310 00:18:16,469 --> 00:18:17,871 So now you need a sense of humor. 311 00:18:39,459 --> 00:18:40,861 So, what about the tough questions? 312 00:18:55,408 --> 00:18:57,477 Sex drive, maybe a little one. 313 00:20:41,046 --> 00:20:42,612 This is going to take all night. 314 00:21:21,554 --> 00:21:22,956 OK Simon, we're leaving. 315 00:21:24,056 --> 00:21:26,392 They're toaster tarts in the pantry for breakfast. 316 00:21:26,959 --> 00:21:29,996 Don't be late for school. 317 00:21:30,497 --> 00:21:31,498 Simon? 318 00:21:31,797 --> 00:21:33,499 Simon! 319 00:21:33,799 --> 00:21:37,103 OK, Mom. 320 00:24:39,017 --> 00:24:41,317 OMG, did you hear Bash and Desiree broke up? 321 00:24:41,319 --> 00:24:43,756 He is so going to [inaudible] at his party. 322 00:24:44,023 --> 00:24:45,625 OMG. 323 00:25:09,716 --> 00:25:10,850 Hey, no. 324 00:25:23,095 --> 00:25:25,198 Sup, Vag? 325 00:25:25,765 --> 00:25:26,796 What's this? 326 00:25:26,798 --> 00:25:28,767 Aw, we have all the time in the world. 327 00:25:29,501 --> 00:25:31,837 No you don't, you have until Friday. 328 00:25:32,971 --> 00:25:34,338 That's our English assignment, especially 329 00:25:34,340 --> 00:25:36,676 since you were too much of a pussy to show up this morning. 330 00:25:37,776 --> 00:25:40,410 I need it by Friday night, so bring it to my party. 331 00:25:40,412 --> 00:25:43,280 And bring your little girlfriend too, I hear she's in college. 332 00:25:43,282 --> 00:25:45,483 I totally get off on the idea of the first college girl 333 00:25:45,485 --> 00:25:48,252 I'll go balls deep is stolen from you. 334 00:25:48,254 --> 00:25:50,657 Hey, there's that bugger Peg over there with Desiree again. 335 00:25:51,157 --> 00:25:52,023 Like I give a shit. 336 00:25:52,025 --> 00:25:54,158 I got girls waiting to blow me. 337 00:25:54,160 --> 00:25:56,095 Let that geek carry her purse for a few days. 338 00:25:56,796 --> 00:25:58,294 I need a break anyway. 339 00:25:58,296 --> 00:25:59,897 But if your BFF touches her, I'll 340 00:25:59,899 --> 00:26:01,765 split both your nut sacks in half. 341 00:26:01,767 --> 00:26:03,335 You got the Vag? 342 00:26:04,303 --> 00:26:07,172 How can I have a nut sack if I'm a vag? 343 00:26:10,876 --> 00:26:19,385 Jell-O. Friday. 344 00:26:40,439 --> 00:26:42,072 OK, so now we're in agreement here. 345 00:26:42,074 --> 00:26:44,008 Cindy's office squad which is perfect, 346 00:26:45,074 --> 00:26:45,441 because when you look at your reputation 347 00:26:45,443 --> 00:26:48,447 now we just can't have the whole squad brought down by it. 348 00:26:48,948 --> 00:26:49,546 Right. 349 00:26:49,548 --> 00:26:50,848 I know. 350 00:26:50,850 --> 00:26:53,853 So, shopping, I'll get her make up all in place, and... 351 00:26:54,187 --> 00:26:55,119 Desiree. 352 00:26:55,121 --> 00:26:58,488 Anyway, what I'm thinking... what? 353 00:26:58,490 --> 00:27:00,323 You know what, why don't we just finish up 354 00:27:00,325 --> 00:27:01,559 this conversation tomorrow. 355 00:27:01,561 --> 00:27:02,092 All right. 356 00:27:02,094 --> 00:27:02,927 Sounds good. 357 00:27:02,929 --> 00:27:03,828 OK. 358 00:27:03,830 --> 00:27:08,565 Bye-bye. 359 00:27:08,567 --> 00:27:10,200 I just wanted to see if you wanted 360 00:27:10,202 --> 00:27:11,171 to hang out and or something. 361 00:27:12,371 --> 00:27:18,244 I know what you want, you want to kiss me. 362 00:27:22,215 --> 00:27:23,183 Maybe, maybe. 363 00:27:23,850 --> 00:27:24,982 You know, whatever. 364 00:27:24,984 --> 00:27:26,149 Yeah, sure. 365 00:27:26,151 --> 00:27:28,488 What do you want to do, man? 366 00:27:29,121 --> 00:27:30,256 I don't even care. 367 00:27:31,123 --> 00:27:33,122 I have an idea, how about this? 368 00:27:33,124 --> 00:27:34,861 Why don't you come over to my place tonight 369 00:27:35,494 --> 00:27:38,264 and help me with my homework. 370 00:27:39,431 --> 00:27:44,370 And then afterwards, who knows, maybe you'll get lucky. 371 00:27:47,606 --> 00:27:48,672 Yeah, uh, yeah. 372 00:27:48,674 --> 00:27:51,009 Uh, yeah, I got plans but I can cancel. 373 00:27:56,615 --> 00:27:59,352 Oh. 374 00:27:59,619 --> 00:28:03,152 Um. 375 00:28:03,154 --> 00:28:14,163 Down boy. 376 00:30:32,203 --> 00:30:33,236 Ow. 377 00:30:33,238 --> 00:30:34,073 Son of a bitch. 378 00:31:01,667 --> 00:31:02,533 Who? 379 00:31:08,473 --> 00:31:11,209 Its me, Simon. 380 00:31:11,643 --> 00:31:15,344 Lilly? 381 00:31:15,346 --> 00:31:15,813 No. 382 00:31:15,815 --> 00:31:17,083 How? 383 00:31:17,516 --> 00:31:19,584 You created me. 384 00:31:20,486 --> 00:31:24,223 You designed me and now I'm here. 385 00:31:24,623 --> 00:31:26,992 No. 386 00:31:27,492 --> 00:31:29,094 No, this isn't real. 387 00:31:29,495 --> 00:31:30,761 I'm dreaming. 388 00:31:30,763 --> 00:31:32,565 You were dreaming that this happened? 389 00:31:42,440 --> 00:31:48,247 Yup, this is exactly what happens. 390 00:31:48,780 --> 00:31:49,178 Oh, I'm sorry. 391 00:31:49,180 --> 00:31:50,113 Ow. 392 00:31:50,115 --> 00:31:51,114 So am I. 393 00:31:51,116 --> 00:31:53,485 I'm sorry, I'm sorry. 394 00:31:54,120 --> 00:31:55,151 I'll clean it up. 395 00:32:17,776 --> 00:32:18,276 OK. 396 00:32:18,977 --> 00:32:21,080 I think I'm finished. 397 00:32:21,580 --> 00:32:22,882 Desiree, I'm finished. 398 00:32:26,818 --> 00:32:28,451 Did you do the differentials part? 399 00:32:28,453 --> 00:32:29,453 Yes, I did. 400 00:32:29,455 --> 00:32:32,125 OK, because that's what do tomorrow. 401 00:32:32,557 --> 00:32:37,361 Ah well, I did it. 402 00:32:37,363 --> 00:32:43,833 So... 403 00:32:43,835 --> 00:32:45,103 So what? 404 00:32:46,238 --> 00:32:48,471 Well, you know, I did your homework for you 405 00:32:48,473 --> 00:32:50,175 and we had a conversation earlier. 406 00:32:50,942 --> 00:32:53,145 It was a great conversation, I loved it. 407 00:32:55,613 --> 00:32:57,616 You're are so cute. 408 00:32:58,717 --> 00:33:04,190 And you said something about, uh, getting lucky. 409 00:33:07,526 --> 00:33:08,728 Oh. 410 00:33:09,628 --> 00:33:11,727 Well, don't you have a girlfriend? 411 00:33:11,729 --> 00:33:15,233 Oh, well she, uh, she um, we have an understanding. 412 00:33:15,834 --> 00:33:16,932 What kind of understanding? 413 00:33:16,934 --> 00:33:19,838 Well, uh, you know, she's a college girl, 414 00:33:20,672 --> 00:33:23,209 and so she's super open minded. 415 00:33:26,277 --> 00:33:27,343 We can see other people. 416 00:33:27,345 --> 00:33:28,512 You know, it's not a big deal. 417 00:33:28,514 --> 00:33:29,615 No. 418 00:33:30,382 --> 00:33:31,648 No, I'm not OK with that. 419 00:33:31,650 --> 00:33:34,187 If you want anything to happen here tonight with me, 420 00:33:34,753 --> 00:33:36,089 you have to end it with her. 421 00:33:36,354 --> 00:33:39,255 OK. 422 00:33:39,257 --> 00:33:39,957 Well? 423 00:33:39,959 --> 00:33:40,791 What? 424 00:33:40,793 --> 00:33:41,292 What you want me to do it now? 425 00:33:41,294 --> 00:33:41,691 Right now? 426 00:33:41,693 --> 00:33:43,296 Yes. 427 00:33:43,562 --> 00:33:44,761 Now. 428 00:33:44,763 --> 00:33:46,763 It's going to be a long conversation, you know? 429 00:33:46,765 --> 00:33:49,835 And it's going to take a while. 430 00:33:54,340 --> 00:33:54,807 Now. 431 00:33:55,306 --> 00:33:56,239 Yeah. 432 00:33:56,241 --> 00:33:56,939 OK. 433 00:33:56,941 --> 00:33:57,474 I could do it now. 434 00:33:57,476 --> 00:34:00,776 That's fine. 435 00:34:00,778 --> 00:34:04,784 Oh, and I want all those Facebook photos of you 436 00:34:05,351 --> 00:34:05,948 two gone. 437 00:34:05,950 --> 00:34:06,917 Uh, yeah. 438 00:34:06,919 --> 00:34:07,650 OK. 439 00:34:07,652 --> 00:34:08,351 I'll just untag myself. 440 00:34:08,353 --> 00:34:10,388 No, I want them gone. 441 00:34:10,788 --> 00:34:11,554 OK. 442 00:34:11,556 --> 00:34:12,922 I'll go do that right now. 443 00:34:12,924 --> 00:34:14,392 No. 444 00:34:14,926 --> 00:34:16,493 Do it here. 445 00:34:16,495 --> 00:34:17,864 I don't necessarily think that's right. 446 00:34:18,830 --> 00:34:20,665 I mean, you know, they mean a lot to her. 447 00:34:21,567 --> 00:34:23,266 I should let her down easy, you know? 448 00:34:23,268 --> 00:34:26,335 OK. 449 00:34:26,337 --> 00:34:28,607 But just so you know, you better do it quickly 450 00:34:29,674 --> 00:34:31,276 because I'm not going to wait here all night. 451 00:34:31,643 --> 00:34:32,777 Yeah, yeah. 452 00:34:33,678 --> 00:34:36,815 Oh, I'm just going to grab my shoes. 453 00:34:37,515 --> 00:34:40,619 I'll be right back. 454 00:34:54,433 --> 00:34:56,669 Simon, let me in, man. 455 00:34:56,968 --> 00:35:04,308 Simon! 456 00:35:04,310 --> 00:35:08,413 Hey, Simon, I know your mad, man, but I need your laptop. 457 00:35:11,716 --> 00:35:18,020 Simon, Simon. 458 00:35:18,022 --> 00:35:20,792 Simon, I got to borrow your laptop, dude. 459 00:35:21,460 --> 00:35:22,962 Did you hear that? 460 00:35:23,462 --> 00:35:24,463 Nothing. 461 00:35:24,897 --> 00:35:26,832 OK. 462 00:35:27,732 --> 00:35:31,803 Yup, Desiree wants to bone tonight 463 00:35:32,738 --> 00:35:34,504 and I got to be a free man beforehand. 464 00:35:34,506 --> 00:35:35,438 What the? 465 00:35:35,440 --> 00:35:37,310 What is up with this? 466 00:35:37,942 --> 00:35:40,379 Why is the keyboard all sticky? 467 00:35:40,645 --> 00:35:41,678 Ew. 468 00:35:41,680 --> 00:35:43,446 You know how girls are, man. 469 00:35:43,448 --> 00:35:47,352 They always want to own the pig, pun intended. 470 00:35:47,618 --> 00:35:55,025 OK. 471 00:35:55,027 --> 00:35:55,895 All right. 472 00:36:00,631 --> 00:36:01,767 I'm taking your laptop, dude. 473 00:36:08,940 --> 00:36:10,475 I'll leave a message. 474 00:36:15,814 --> 00:36:22,388 Dear Simon, borrowing your laptop, 475 00:36:23,020 --> 00:36:25,290 bring back to school tomorrow. 476 00:36:26,988 --> 00:36:27,988 Love 477 00:36:28,393 --> 00:36:29,962 and kisses, Peg. 478 00:37:57,181 --> 00:37:59,884 You're so sexy when you wake up. 479 00:38:00,518 --> 00:38:01,886 It wasn't a dream. 480 00:38:05,857 --> 00:38:15,500 I'm so... you were [inaudible]. 481 00:38:15,834 --> 00:38:18,437 You were. 482 00:38:27,513 --> 00:38:33,516 Mmmm. 483 00:38:33,518 --> 00:38:34,850 You're going to love it. 484 00:38:54,806 --> 00:38:55,804 It's so good. 485 00:38:55,806 --> 00:38:56,674 It's so good. 486 00:38:59,810 --> 00:39:02,948 I think you've got this covered. 487 00:40:16,754 --> 00:40:17,622 All right. 488 00:40:28,767 --> 00:40:31,169 Ew. 489 00:40:37,375 --> 00:40:40,546 You know, I never thought that Red Vines 490 00:40:41,046 --> 00:40:42,045 would be so delicious. 491 00:40:42,047 --> 00:40:43,179 I know, right? 492 00:40:43,181 --> 00:40:46,785 They're so bad for you but I don't even care. 493 00:40:54,326 --> 00:40:56,161 Did you just Disney movie me? 494 00:40:56,661 --> 00:40:57,763 Maybe. 495 00:40:58,696 --> 00:41:05,067 That's pretty cheesy, babe. 496 00:41:12,243 --> 00:41:13,442 Oh. 497 00:41:13,444 --> 00:41:16,714 I guess it just needed time to juice up, I guess. 498 00:41:22,953 --> 00:41:24,823 Hey Stacey. 499 00:41:25,457 --> 00:41:26,592 How are you doing? 500 00:41:30,696 --> 00:41:31,995 Can we talk for a minute? 501 00:41:31,997 --> 00:41:33,632 I need to tell you something. 502 00:41:34,332 --> 00:41:37,136 It's not going to work between us. 503 00:41:37,468 --> 00:41:38,303 I know. 504 00:41:38,969 --> 00:41:39,969 It's not you, OK? 505 00:41:39,971 --> 00:41:42,641 It's me. 506 00:41:43,741 --> 00:41:47,680 Well, it's a little bit you because on the account 507 00:41:48,180 --> 00:41:51,149 that you're not real. 508 00:41:51,850 --> 00:41:52,851 But, you know what? 509 00:41:54,085 --> 00:41:57,056 You did better than I ever though you would for me. 510 00:41:57,388 --> 00:41:58,754 You know? 511 00:41:58,756 --> 00:42:00,857 You got me Desiree, and, you know, you're a wonderful girl. 512 00:42:00,859 --> 00:42:03,862 And listen, you know, I'm sure that one day you're 513 00:42:04,930 --> 00:42:06,462 going to go out there, you're going 514 00:42:06,464 --> 00:42:10,368 to make some sad, lonely computer nerd super happy. 515 00:42:11,069 --> 00:42:12,671 Not this guy, not me. 516 00:43:17,468 --> 00:43:18,202 Damn. 517 00:43:19,236 --> 00:43:20,939 Simon is like Rain man with this shit. 518 00:43:26,844 --> 00:43:27,745 What is this? 519 00:43:28,212 --> 00:43:29,781 Sex drive at 15%? 520 00:43:30,348 --> 00:43:31,850 Simon, you're such a pussy. 521 00:43:33,551 --> 00:43:35,819 She's going to need more emotional than that, 522 00:43:35,821 --> 00:43:39,823 she's not a robot. 523 00:43:39,825 --> 00:43:41,359 Maybe a little strength too, maybe she'll 524 00:43:42,127 --> 00:43:43,228 be beat Bash's ass for us. 525 00:43:48,500 --> 00:43:49,165 There we go. 526 00:43:49,167 --> 00:43:50,902 That's more like it. 527 00:43:54,939 --> 00:43:55,904 Updating. 528 00:43:55,906 --> 00:43:56,841 Updating. 529 00:43:57,174 --> 00:43:58,843 Updating. 530 00:43:59,210 --> 00:44:00,745 Updating. 531 00:44:01,111 --> 00:44:02,111 Updating. 532 00:44:02,113 --> 00:44:03,045 Updating. 533 00:44:03,047 --> 00:44:03,781 Updating. 534 00:44:04,114 --> 00:44:04,880 Updating. 535 00:44:04,882 --> 00:44:13,255 Updating. 536 00:44:13,257 --> 00:44:14,326 Take it off. 537 00:44:14,893 --> 00:44:15,391 Take it off. 538 00:44:15,393 --> 00:44:16,929 Lilly! 539 00:44:17,261 --> 00:44:18,194 Shut up! 540 00:44:18,196 --> 00:44:18,964 Take it off. 541 00:44:19,730 --> 00:44:21,196 Don't look me in the eye. 542 00:44:35,379 --> 00:44:37,381 Your friend Peg broke up with Stacey last night. 543 00:44:41,585 --> 00:44:42,286 Yeah? 544 00:44:43,087 --> 00:44:44,654 Desiree is pretty into him. 545 00:44:44,656 --> 00:44:46,556 So are you going to do that with me? 546 00:44:46,558 --> 00:44:47,259 What? 547 00:44:47,558 --> 00:44:48,558 What? 548 00:44:48,560 --> 00:44:49,893 Break up with me for some stupid slut 549 00:44:49,895 --> 00:44:52,428 as soon as she starts showing a little interest in you. 550 00:44:52,430 --> 00:44:53,832 No, it's totally different. 551 00:44:54,598 --> 00:44:56,401 Stacey's just someone that Peg made up. 552 00:44:57,301 --> 00:44:59,337 Desiree is a real girl, so he must... 553 00:45:00,038 --> 00:45:02,775 Well, you made me up. 554 00:45:03,308 --> 00:45:04,510 Yeah, but you're real now. 555 00:45:07,544 --> 00:45:08,844 Stacey was just a Facebook page. 556 00:45:08,846 --> 00:45:13,919 Besides, Peg has had a crush on Desiree for like ever. 557 00:45:14,185 --> 00:45:14,920 Wait. 558 00:45:16,087 --> 00:45:18,487 So if some little bitch you've had a crush on 559 00:45:18,489 --> 00:45:20,255 starts showing a little interest in you, 560 00:45:20,257 --> 00:45:22,058 you are just going to leave me for her? 561 00:45:22,060 --> 00:45:22,891 Is that it? 562 00:45:22,893 --> 00:45:23,558 I don't know what's happening. 563 00:45:23,560 --> 00:45:24,259 OK. 564 00:45:24,261 --> 00:45:25,363 Why are you so upset? 565 00:45:25,629 --> 00:45:26,395 OK. 566 00:45:26,397 --> 00:45:28,464 Just take a deep breath. 567 00:45:28,466 --> 00:45:30,333 "The Woman in Me," by Rebecca [inaudible] 568 00:45:30,335 --> 00:45:32,368 says that when I am feeling marginalized by my man, 569 00:45:32,370 --> 00:45:34,569 I just need to take a deep breath 570 00:45:34,571 --> 00:45:37,575 and step back, and count the ways in which I 571 00:45:38,243 --> 00:45:39,109 am a powerful woman. 572 00:45:39,111 --> 00:45:40,576 I won't let you steal my power. 573 00:45:40,578 --> 00:45:41,243 Baby, just... 574 00:45:41,245 --> 00:45:43,279 Don't use that word. 575 00:45:43,281 --> 00:45:45,049 That word is designed to lower my feminine value. 576 00:45:45,582 --> 00:45:47,952 I apologize. 577 00:45:48,218 --> 00:45:49,421 OK. 578 00:45:50,120 --> 00:45:53,392 I don't want to fight. 579 00:45:54,024 --> 00:45:55,091 Do you love me? 580 00:45:55,093 --> 00:45:56,225 So much. 581 00:45:56,227 --> 00:45:58,596 And you promise you will never ever leave me 582 00:45:59,297 --> 00:46:00,465 for some stupid slut? 583 00:46:01,131 --> 00:46:04,068 No, no, no, no, mam. 584 00:46:05,002 --> 00:46:06,435 Can you stay with me today? 585 00:46:06,437 --> 00:46:08,006 It's just too early for you to leave me. 586 00:46:08,406 --> 00:46:09,672 I have to go. 587 00:46:09,674 --> 00:46:13,111 If I miss more than one class, they call my parents. 588 00:46:13,678 --> 00:46:15,513 Oh, I've got it. 589 00:46:21,618 --> 00:46:22,750 Mrs. Dops? 590 00:46:22,752 --> 00:46:25,054 Simon has a fever today and we wouldn't want 591 00:46:25,056 --> 00:46:27,125 him giving it to anyone else. 592 00:46:27,759 --> 00:46:29,027 Thank you so much. 593 00:46:29,426 --> 00:46:30,525 I'll tell him. 594 00:46:30,527 --> 00:46:32,330 OK. 595 00:46:32,629 --> 00:46:33,397 Done. 596 00:46:34,431 --> 00:46:36,500 Now, let's have a little fun and then 597 00:46:37,402 --> 00:46:38,937 I can fill your tummy with pancakes. 598 00:46:39,270 --> 00:46:40,005 Oh my God. 599 00:46:40,772 --> 00:46:46,542 You're the perfect woman. 600 00:46:46,544 --> 00:46:48,411 So she was like, "That's my purse," 601 00:46:48,413 --> 00:46:50,212 like she owned it already, but I mean, 602 00:46:50,214 --> 00:46:51,214 we were both in the same store. 603 00:46:51,216 --> 00:46:53,315 And if she wanted it that badly, she 604 00:46:53,317 --> 00:46:54,583 wouldn't have left it outside when 605 00:46:54,585 --> 00:46:56,085 she was in the dressing room. 606 00:46:56,087 --> 00:46:57,553 OMG, what did you do? 607 00:46:57,555 --> 00:46:59,422 Bitch tried to call security on me, 608 00:46:59,424 --> 00:47:00,790 so I just took out my credit card 609 00:47:00,792 --> 00:47:03,495 and I paid for it, staring her down the whole time smiling. 610 00:47:04,361 --> 00:47:05,761 I mean, what was she going to do? 611 00:47:21,111 --> 00:47:21,810 What? 612 00:47:21,812 --> 00:47:23,446 You made your point. 613 00:47:23,448 --> 00:47:25,214 Listen, I'm not here to apologize or anything, 614 00:47:25,216 --> 00:47:27,085 and I'm not saying anything is going on with Sydney, 615 00:47:27,518 --> 00:47:28,585 but if it were... 616 00:47:28,587 --> 00:47:30,353 and last night it was, it would be over. 617 00:47:30,355 --> 00:47:31,321 Like I care. 618 00:47:31,323 --> 00:47:32,187 I already got that bitch thrown off 619 00:47:32,189 --> 00:47:33,589 the cheer leading squad anyway. 620 00:47:33,591 --> 00:47:37,930 And what about that slut who said she was going to blow you? 621 00:47:40,765 --> 00:47:42,935 Listen Bash, the girl obviously doesn't want to talk to you. 622 00:47:43,468 --> 00:47:44,833 So why don't you just... 623 00:47:44,835 --> 00:47:45,234 Shut up. 624 00:47:45,236 --> 00:47:46,638 OK. 625 00:47:48,006 --> 00:47:51,609 Baby, I'm done with the whole blow job receiving business. 626 00:47:52,143 --> 00:47:58,080 Totally. 627 00:47:58,082 --> 00:47:59,450 OK. 628 00:48:00,085 --> 00:48:01,119 You're dismissed. 629 00:48:01,386 --> 00:48:02,087 Huh? 630 00:48:02,520 --> 00:48:03,486 We're done here. 631 00:48:03,488 --> 00:48:06,457 You can go now. 632 00:48:06,757 --> 00:48:09,093 Go away. 633 00:48:13,531 --> 00:48:14,496 Is that Simon's? 634 00:48:14,498 --> 00:48:15,364 Uh, yeah. 635 00:48:15,366 --> 00:48:16,399 I'm supposed to give it to him. 636 00:48:16,401 --> 00:48:19,868 Go. 637 00:48:19,870 --> 00:48:24,339 So cute. 638 00:48:24,341 --> 00:48:25,743 Bash, baby, what have you been up to? 639 00:49:00,344 --> 00:49:02,214 Have balls, Peg. 640 00:49:10,555 --> 00:49:11,589 Mmm, pancakes. 641 00:49:17,261 --> 00:49:18,263 Baby? 642 00:49:18,830 --> 00:49:20,062 Lilly, sorry. 643 00:49:20,064 --> 00:49:26,171 Lilly the door is locked from the outside, I guess. 644 00:49:58,602 --> 00:49:59,634 The door was locked. 645 00:49:59,636 --> 00:50:01,536 I would have gone down and helped you. 646 00:50:01,538 --> 00:50:04,176 I know, I locked it. 647 00:50:04,475 --> 00:50:05,210 What? 648 00:50:05,910 --> 00:50:07,342 Why would you do that? 649 00:50:07,344 --> 00:50:09,680 It's just better this way. 650 00:50:10,281 --> 00:50:10,846 What's better? 651 00:50:10,848 --> 00:50:12,582 What way? 652 00:50:12,584 --> 00:50:14,819 Did you know that 99.7% of all relationships 653 00:50:15,620 --> 00:50:17,553 starting in high school end? 654 00:50:17,555 --> 00:50:19,422 I can't have you leaving with the odds 655 00:50:19,424 --> 00:50:20,855 overwhelmingly against us. 656 00:50:20,857 --> 00:50:23,562 I just want us to stay together, sweetie. 657 00:50:26,230 --> 00:50:29,100 So, you just want to keep me locked up in my house? 658 00:50:29,533 --> 00:50:30,799 In your room, yes. 659 00:50:30,801 --> 00:50:34,305 When you say it like that you make it sound so bad. 660 00:50:34,571 --> 00:50:35,670 OK. 661 00:50:35,672 --> 00:50:38,776 Sweetheart, I know this is all new to you, 662 00:50:39,810 --> 00:50:41,745 but I have to be able to eat and drink and... 663 00:50:42,580 --> 00:50:45,350 I'll get you whatever you need. 664 00:50:46,250 --> 00:50:48,386 Honey, this is just silly. 665 00:50:49,453 --> 00:50:50,652 You're just looking for an excuse 666 00:50:50,654 --> 00:50:53,325 to leave me like your pervy little friend, Peg. 667 00:50:57,928 --> 00:51:00,598 Now, Lilly, this is not acceptable behavior. 668 00:51:01,431 --> 00:51:03,031 Don't talk down to me like that. 669 00:51:03,033 --> 00:51:05,533 In "Taking My Power Back, by Beatrice Lesband, 670 00:51:05,535 --> 00:51:07,171 she says that men are free to roam 671 00:51:07,904 --> 00:51:09,571 wherever they please while woman are 672 00:51:09,573 --> 00:51:11,007 expected to just stay at home. 673 00:51:11,009 --> 00:51:14,379 Oh, we're not roaming anywhere, Mr. You're staying right here. 674 00:51:14,946 --> 00:51:16,112 Deep breathes. 675 00:51:16,114 --> 00:51:18,416 Count the ways in which I am a powerful woman. 676 00:51:19,716 --> 00:51:21,852 Now, eat your pancakes, and I'm going to go clean up 677 00:51:22,654 --> 00:51:23,786 after making your breakfast. 678 00:51:23,788 --> 00:51:25,357 I need to cool down. 679 00:51:30,361 --> 00:51:31,426 I'm so sorry. 680 00:51:31,428 --> 00:51:34,431 I just... I'm just so afraid without you. 681 00:51:35,299 --> 00:51:38,967 I don't know what I did. 682 00:51:38,969 --> 00:51:39,870 Baby, here. 683 00:51:40,571 --> 00:51:41,303 I'll clean this up. 684 00:51:41,305 --> 00:51:42,440 There's that word again. 685 00:51:43,408 --> 00:51:46,844 You don't respect me, do you? 686 00:51:47,511 --> 00:51:50,714 Baby, baby, baby. 687 00:51:51,515 --> 00:51:53,350 Who else are you calling baby? 688 00:51:56,453 --> 00:51:57,420 No one. 689 00:51:57,422 --> 00:51:58,420 Only you. 690 00:51:58,422 --> 00:51:59,422 I promise. 691 00:51:59,424 --> 00:52:01,660 I'll never say it again. 692 00:52:02,326 --> 00:52:03,227 Oh, I'll show you. 693 00:52:41,765 --> 00:52:43,367 You're so strong. 694 00:52:43,968 --> 00:52:45,467 Where did you get handcuffs? 695 00:52:45,469 --> 00:52:46,101 Amazon. 696 00:52:46,103 --> 00:52:47,303 I got them for us. 697 00:52:47,305 --> 00:52:49,274 I thought it would add excitement in the bedroom. 698 00:52:49,741 --> 00:52:50,909 Aw, that's sweet. 699 00:52:51,375 --> 00:52:56,679 Right? 700 00:52:56,681 --> 00:52:57,647 There. 701 00:52:57,649 --> 00:52:58,948 Now, you stay here and rest and I'm 702 00:52:58,950 --> 00:53:02,020 going to go downstairs and clean up the mess you made. 703 00:53:35,085 --> 00:53:38,920 Come on. 704 00:53:43,428 --> 00:53:45,897 Simon, dude, I don't think I've ever made a phone 705 00:53:46,663 --> 00:53:47,495 call on this phone before. 706 00:53:47,497 --> 00:53:48,998 That's how important this is. 707 00:53:49,000 --> 00:53:50,598 Please answer your phone. 708 00:53:50,600 --> 00:53:51,468 Dude, come on. 709 00:53:51,868 --> 00:53:52,634 You know what? 710 00:53:52,636 --> 00:53:53,502 Fuck it. 711 00:53:53,504 --> 00:53:54,103 I'm coming over right now, dude. 712 00:54:32,042 --> 00:54:32,875 No way. 713 00:54:43,821 --> 00:54:44,886 What are you doing? 714 00:54:44,888 --> 00:54:46,020 Don't worry about it. 715 00:54:46,022 --> 00:54:47,823 Just take off your shirt and get on the bed. 716 00:54:47,825 --> 00:54:49,593 I'm about to get super cranked up. 717 00:54:50,027 --> 00:54:50,993 No. 718 00:54:50,995 --> 00:54:52,694 No way, we need to talk about this. 719 00:54:52,696 --> 00:54:54,565 I'm not OK with what happened. 720 00:55:00,971 --> 00:55:03,908 Who is that girl? 721 00:55:04,642 --> 00:55:06,977 We're about to find out. 722 00:55:07,511 --> 00:55:08,145 Oh, Jesus. 723 00:55:14,285 --> 00:55:14,953 Oh. 724 00:55:15,819 --> 00:55:17,654 Oh my God, I'm so out of shape. 725 00:55:21,091 --> 00:55:25,162 God, this is the only time I'll thank you for a small hand. 726 00:55:54,558 --> 00:55:57,161 Look, will you stop playing around on Facebook 727 00:55:57,828 --> 00:56:00,031 and come talk to me? 728 00:56:00,698 --> 00:56:02,567 Babe, I'm at work. 729 00:56:03,134 --> 00:56:04,732 Oh my God, don't babe me. 730 00:56:04,734 --> 00:56:05,636 Get over here. 731 00:56:06,036 --> 00:56:07,870 Me too, babe. 732 00:56:07,872 --> 00:56:12,444 You're such a ass, douche bag, whole ass. 733 00:56:13,277 --> 00:56:15,480 You know, I'm not coming to your party tonight. 734 00:56:19,082 --> 00:56:23,153 And, I was going to make cupcakes. 735 00:56:23,988 --> 00:56:31,962 Desiree, what kind of cupcakes? 736 00:56:32,330 --> 00:56:33,931 Strawberry. 737 00:56:34,631 --> 00:56:35,999 Those are my favorite. 738 00:56:36,734 --> 00:56:41,036 Well, I know that's silly. 739 00:56:41,038 --> 00:56:43,007 Simon, was that you? 740 00:56:47,210 --> 00:56:48,946 You crafty little devil. 741 00:56:49,814 --> 00:56:52,649 How did you slip those handcuffs? 742 00:56:52,950 --> 00:56:55,118 Simon? 743 00:56:55,620 --> 00:56:57,755 Simon? 744 00:56:58,622 --> 00:56:59,621 Oh, you poor thing. 745 00:56:59,623 --> 00:57:00,625 You're hurt. 746 00:57:00,890 --> 00:57:02,626 Woah. 747 00:57:02,893 --> 00:57:04,028 No! 748 00:57:13,870 --> 00:57:14,738 Oh my God. 749 00:57:22,279 --> 00:57:23,879 I'm just going to walk from here. 750 00:57:23,881 --> 00:57:26,116 What's the worst that could happen? 751 00:57:29,419 --> 00:57:31,655 Oh my God. 752 00:57:32,022 --> 00:57:33,524 Oh fuck me. 753 00:57:33,790 --> 00:57:38,726 Oh. 754 00:57:38,728 --> 00:57:42,698 OK. 755 00:57:44,968 --> 00:57:47,104 Oh God. 756 00:57:47,404 --> 00:57:48,805 Simon? 757 00:57:49,372 --> 00:57:51,241 Let me in, man. 758 00:57:51,808 --> 00:57:52,709 Who is it? 759 00:57:53,210 --> 00:57:55,143 Simon, let me in, man. 760 00:57:55,145 --> 00:57:57,247 Now's not a really good time, man. 761 00:57:58,181 --> 00:57:59,882 Simon, just let me talk for a minute 762 00:57:59,884 --> 00:58:02,786 and I can explain everything. 763 00:58:03,421 --> 00:58:04,821 Look I'm sorry, man. 764 00:58:05,955 --> 00:58:10,694 I got caught up being popular and having 765 00:58:11,194 --> 00:58:13,765 Desiree be so into me. 766 00:58:14,098 --> 00:58:15,129 You know? 767 00:58:15,131 --> 00:58:18,035 She was really into me, but you what? 768 00:58:19,169 --> 00:58:22,639 I decided to leave that and come here for you, man. 769 00:58:25,375 --> 00:58:27,711 Simon? 770 00:58:28,011 --> 00:58:29,846 Simon? 771 00:58:30,314 --> 00:58:31,815 Simon? 772 00:58:32,248 --> 00:58:37,953 Damn. 773 00:58:37,955 --> 00:58:39,257 You see right through me, don't you? 774 00:58:39,924 --> 00:58:42,727 Best buds always do. 775 00:58:43,493 --> 00:58:47,832 She dumped me, man like month old cheese. 776 00:58:51,167 --> 00:58:53,368 Like I wasn't even a real person. 777 00:58:53,370 --> 00:58:57,342 Liked all those hot, steamy, passion-filled nights. 778 00:59:00,410 --> 00:59:02,111 It's like they meant nothing to her, 779 00:59:02,113 --> 00:59:12,754 like it didn't even happen. 780 00:59:12,756 --> 00:59:15,225 All right, full disclosure, that thing I just said, 781 00:59:15,826 --> 00:59:16,924 it was a lie. 782 00:59:16,926 --> 00:59:18,794 The thing about the passion-filled nights 783 00:59:18,796 --> 00:59:19,995 never happened. 784 00:59:19,997 --> 00:59:21,964 But you're going to bet your ass that I'm going 785 00:59:21,966 --> 00:59:23,364 to tell everyone that it did. 786 00:59:23,366 --> 00:59:25,202 I don't care what Bash does to me. 787 00:59:29,038 --> 00:59:30,004 OK. 788 00:59:30,006 --> 00:59:31,071 That thing I just said was a lie. 789 00:59:31,073 --> 00:59:32,909 I absolutely care what Bash does to me. 790 00:59:33,843 --> 00:59:35,912 I'm sorry I bailed on you. 791 00:59:36,913 --> 00:59:38,179 When you needed me most I just... 792 00:59:38,181 --> 00:59:40,317 oh shit. 793 00:59:40,850 --> 00:59:42,419 Oh shit. 794 00:59:43,154 --> 00:59:44,922 I'm coming little buddy. 795 00:59:51,428 --> 00:59:57,866 Damnit. 796 00:59:57,868 --> 00:59:59,804 Oh shit. 797 01:00:00,103 --> 01:00:01,203 Simon. 798 01:00:01,205 --> 01:00:02,069 Who the hell is that? 799 01:00:02,071 --> 01:00:03,173 It's Lilly. 800 01:00:03,573 --> 01:00:04,505 No, seriously. 801 01:00:04,507 --> 01:00:05,373 Who is it? 802 01:00:05,375 --> 01:00:08,278 Oh damn, it's a hooker isn't it? 803 01:00:08,978 --> 01:00:10,247 Mam, we're minors, OK? 804 01:00:11,114 --> 01:00:13,114 So, whatever money he owes you we 805 01:00:13,116 --> 01:00:14,685 could probably pay it back, just... 806 01:00:15,051 --> 01:00:15,951 God damn. 807 01:00:15,953 --> 01:00:16,685 Hookers are strong. 808 01:00:16,687 --> 01:00:17,855 Shut up you little perv. 809 01:00:18,355 --> 01:00:19,955 It's Lilly for real. 810 01:00:19,957 --> 01:00:21,826 Now stop pulling on me. 811 01:00:22,192 --> 01:00:27,830 Oh my god. 812 01:00:27,832 --> 01:00:30,768 What the hell? 813 01:00:31,134 --> 01:00:32,236 Don't leave. 814 01:00:32,602 --> 01:00:34,305 Hey, help. 815 01:00:34,605 --> 01:00:35,036 Help. 816 01:00:35,038 --> 01:00:35,437 Help. 817 01:00:35,439 --> 01:00:43,511 Hey. 818 01:00:43,513 --> 01:00:44,513 Updating. 819 01:00:44,515 --> 01:00:45,513 Updating. 820 01:00:45,515 --> 01:00:46,515 Updating. 821 01:00:46,517 --> 01:00:47,516 Updating. 822 01:00:47,518 --> 01:00:48,516 Updating. 823 01:00:48,518 --> 01:01:00,328 Updating. 824 01:01:00,330 --> 01:01:05,001 Look at this shit, emotions 21%, strength 80%, 825 01:01:05,969 --> 01:01:07,236 what the hell does this mean? 826 01:01:07,238 --> 01:01:08,270 Baby, what are you doing? 827 01:01:08,272 --> 01:01:10,341 People are downstairs waiting for us. 828 01:01:10,875 --> 01:01:12,040 Nag much? 829 01:01:12,042 --> 01:01:14,911 Just go downstairs, I'll be there in a second. 830 01:01:15,446 --> 01:01:18,415 Oh shit, sex drive 91%. 831 01:01:19,216 --> 01:01:21,018 Simon, you dirty little vag. 832 01:01:22,018 --> 01:01:24,219 Why do you keep using that word? 833 01:01:24,221 --> 01:01:25,857 I don't think it means what you think it means. 834 01:01:26,390 --> 01:01:27,890 Quit breaking my balls. 835 01:01:27,892 --> 01:01:29,292 Just go downstairs. 836 01:01:32,897 --> 01:01:33,864 Ass hole. 837 01:01:34,297 --> 01:01:36,299 Love you, baby. 838 01:01:36,634 --> 01:01:37,132 Updating. 839 01:01:37,134 --> 01:01:38,100 Updating. 840 01:01:38,102 --> 01:01:39,067 Updating. 841 01:01:39,069 --> 01:01:39,902 Updating. 842 01:01:39,904 --> 01:01:40,902 Updating. 843 01:01:40,904 --> 01:01:41,536 Updating. 844 01:01:41,538 --> 01:01:42,170 Updating. 845 01:01:42,172 --> 01:01:44,809 Updating Updating. 846 01:01:45,209 --> 01:01:46,275 WT fuck, man. 847 01:01:46,277 --> 01:01:47,042 Updating. 848 01:01:47,044 --> 01:01:47,909 Updating. 849 01:01:47,911 --> 01:01:49,176 How is she real or or whatever? 850 01:01:49,178 --> 01:01:50,111 I can't even begin to explain. 851 01:01:50,113 --> 01:01:51,312 One minute she was an iPhone app, 852 01:01:51,314 --> 01:01:53,315 and the next she was right there in front of me. 853 01:01:53,317 --> 01:01:54,049 Updating. 854 01:01:54,051 --> 01:01:55,183 Oh my God. 855 01:01:55,185 --> 01:01:55,683 This is crazy, this is crazy, this is crazy. 856 01:01:55,685 --> 01:01:56,618 Updating. 857 01:01:56,620 --> 01:01:57,118 Updating. 858 01:01:57,120 --> 01:01:58,252 Updating. 859 01:01:58,254 --> 01:01:59,254 Updating. 860 01:01:59,256 --> 01:02:00,357 Let's get out of here. 861 01:02:00,690 --> 01:02:04,960 Come on. 862 01:02:04,962 --> 01:02:06,094 What do we do? 863 01:02:06,096 --> 01:02:07,498 We've got to get out of here. 864 01:02:08,131 --> 01:02:09,267 Where do we go? 865 01:02:10,000 --> 01:02:11,068 I have to get my laptop. 866 01:02:11,535 --> 01:02:12,900 Yeah. 867 01:02:12,902 --> 01:02:18,442 Here's the thing about your laptop, Bash kind of stole it. 868 01:02:19,276 --> 01:02:21,879 You have got to be shitting me. 869 01:02:22,413 --> 01:02:23,946 We got to go to Bash's? 870 01:02:23,948 --> 01:02:24,346 Oh fuck that. 871 01:02:24,348 --> 01:02:25,380 No. 872 01:02:25,382 --> 01:02:27,551 Let's go to my house, let's hide out. 873 01:02:28,018 --> 01:02:29,387 No. 874 01:02:30,154 --> 01:02:31,487 We've got to go to Bash's. 875 01:02:31,489 --> 01:02:40,298 I've screwed all of this up and now I've got to fix it. 876 01:03:24,007 --> 01:03:26,042 Ladies and gentleman, this evening's entertainment. 877 01:03:27,310 --> 01:03:31,515 So we all know our little friend Simon and his new girlfriend, 878 01:03:32,750 --> 01:03:36,921 but what you all don't know is that he created this chick out 879 01:03:37,286 --> 01:03:38,286 of thin air. 880 01:03:38,288 --> 01:03:40,625 All these photos, are Photo Shopped. 881 01:03:42,026 --> 01:03:44,060 Let me show you some pictures that weren't Photo Shopped. 882 01:04:17,428 --> 01:04:18,426 Updating. 883 01:04:18,428 --> 01:04:19,428 Updating. 884 01:04:19,430 --> 01:04:20,429 Simon. 885 01:04:20,431 --> 01:04:22,066 Simon, don't leave me. 886 01:04:22,433 --> 01:04:24,068 Updating. 887 01:04:24,435 --> 01:04:25,433 Updating. 888 01:04:25,435 --> 01:04:26,400 Updating. 889 01:04:26,402 --> 01:04:27,402 Updating. 890 01:04:27,404 --> 01:04:28,170 Updating. 891 01:04:28,172 --> 01:04:29,106 Updating. 892 01:04:29,473 --> 01:04:30,205 Updating. 893 01:04:30,207 --> 01:04:31,105 Updating. 894 01:04:31,107 --> 01:04:31,739 OK. 895 01:04:31,741 --> 01:04:32,140 OK. 896 01:04:32,142 --> 01:04:32,774 OK. 897 01:04:32,776 --> 01:04:33,708 I'm freaking out. 898 01:04:33,710 --> 01:04:34,208 I'm done. 899 01:04:34,210 --> 01:04:34,908 I'm done. 900 01:04:34,910 --> 01:04:35,475 Why is she so psycho? 901 01:04:35,477 --> 01:04:36,643 I don't know. 902 01:04:36,645 --> 01:04:41,084 Everything has been great, like really great. 903 01:04:41,852 --> 01:04:45,089 All day yesterday was awesome, you know? 904 01:04:45,721 --> 01:04:47,591 Wait, did you bang that thing? 905 01:04:48,392 --> 01:04:50,727 It's not a thing, it's a girl. 906 01:04:51,395 --> 01:04:54,532 And yes, like a lot. 907 01:04:55,098 --> 01:04:55,966 Nice, man. 908 01:05:27,797 --> 01:05:33,335 What? 909 01:05:56,826 --> 01:05:58,194 Oh, OK. 910 01:05:58,794 --> 01:06:00,228 What are we supposed to do? 911 01:06:00,230 --> 01:06:01,532 Kill her? 912 01:06:01,797 --> 01:06:02,799 No. 913 01:06:03,299 --> 01:06:04,299 No, man. 914 01:06:04,301 --> 01:06:06,103 I'm going to fix her. 915 01:06:06,602 --> 01:06:07,805 I just need my laptop. 916 01:06:08,305 --> 01:06:09,272 Geez. 917 01:06:09,772 --> 01:06:10,772 Updating. 918 01:06:10,774 --> 01:06:11,709 Updating. 919 01:06:35,265 --> 01:06:36,198 God damnit, not again. 920 01:06:36,200 --> 01:06:37,199 Updating. 921 01:06:37,201 --> 01:06:47,208 Updating. 922 01:06:52,815 --> 01:06:54,852 Why is everyone laughing? 923 01:06:58,488 --> 01:06:59,857 Maybe because of that. 924 01:07:06,495 --> 01:07:07,363 That's it. 925 01:07:14,770 --> 01:07:16,640 I thought that would be more dramatic. 926 01:07:16,939 --> 01:07:17,437 Yeah. 927 01:07:17,439 --> 01:07:18,642 Updating. 928 01:07:19,009 --> 01:07:19,777 Updating. 929 01:07:20,343 --> 01:07:25,946 Updating. 930 01:07:25,948 --> 01:07:30,417 Bash? 931 01:07:30,419 --> 01:07:35,690 Bash? 932 01:07:35,692 --> 01:07:38,161 Well well, If it isn't Casanova himself. 933 01:07:38,629 --> 01:07:39,830 Give me my laptop. 934 01:07:40,663 --> 01:07:41,763 Yeah, give him his laptop, dude. 935 01:07:41,765 --> 01:07:44,401 What are you going to do if I don't, Vag? 936 01:07:45,301 --> 01:07:46,533 Man, you don't understand. 937 01:07:46,535 --> 01:07:48,271 I need that laptop. 938 01:07:48,705 --> 01:07:51,342 Well, come get it. 939 01:07:55,879 --> 01:07:56,678 Fuck it. 940 01:07:56,680 --> 01:07:59,250 We don't have time for this. 941 01:08:04,353 --> 01:08:05,156 Simon? 942 01:08:06,256 --> 01:08:08,658 I'm not mad, sweetie, I just want to talk. 943 01:08:09,326 --> 01:08:10,694 Hey baby, what's up? 944 01:08:17,300 --> 01:08:20,668 You. 945 01:08:20,670 --> 01:08:22,070 What do you want, bitch? 946 01:08:22,072 --> 01:08:25,209 You're the tramp that wrecked my best friend's relationship. 947 01:08:25,642 --> 01:08:26,644 Whatever, slut. 948 01:08:29,612 --> 01:08:30,647 Aw, cat fight. 949 01:08:49,065 --> 01:08:50,300 Oh, oh, oh! 950 01:08:50,567 --> 01:08:52,736 Oh! 951 01:08:53,069 --> 01:09:06,448 Oh Peg. 952 01:09:06,450 --> 01:09:09,220 I told I'd go balls deep in your girlfriend tonight. 953 01:09:14,558 --> 01:09:15,123 Updating. 954 01:09:15,125 --> 01:09:16,357 Updating. 955 01:09:16,359 --> 01:09:17,228 Updating. 956 01:09:17,560 --> 01:09:18,392 Updating. 957 01:09:18,394 --> 01:09:18,892 No fucking way. 958 01:09:18,894 --> 01:09:19,761 Updating. 959 01:09:19,763 --> 01:09:20,494 Updating. 960 01:09:20,496 --> 01:09:21,061 Peg. 961 01:09:21,063 --> 01:09:21,798 Updating. 962 01:09:22,131 --> 01:09:23,933 Oh, Peg. 963 01:09:24,768 --> 01:09:28,738 That was so... that was so sweet. 964 01:09:29,538 --> 01:09:31,407 I can't believe you did that. 965 01:09:31,742 --> 01:09:32,673 Desiree? 966 01:09:32,675 --> 01:09:34,911 Is that you? 967 01:09:35,511 --> 01:09:36,412 It's so dark. 968 01:09:36,813 --> 01:09:37,779 It's so cold. 969 01:09:37,781 --> 01:09:39,380 Let me try to get the bottle out. 970 01:09:39,382 --> 01:09:40,015 Oh God, no. 971 01:09:40,017 --> 01:09:40,582 No, that's tender. 972 01:09:40,584 --> 01:09:41,316 That's tender. 973 01:09:41,318 --> 01:09:42,618 It's just your shoulder. 974 01:09:42,620 --> 01:09:44,785 I'm pretty sure if you clean up the wound it'll be OK. 975 01:09:44,787 --> 01:09:46,654 Oh, I didn't know you were a doctor. 976 01:09:46,656 --> 01:09:48,259 Go away please. 977 01:09:48,858 --> 01:09:50,393 Desiree, don't listen to her. 978 01:09:50,794 --> 01:09:52,127 She's crazy. 979 01:09:52,129 --> 01:09:53,430 She's not a doctor. 980 01:10:03,840 --> 01:10:05,005 Give me my laptop. 981 01:10:05,007 --> 01:10:06,510 Updating. 982 01:10:07,010 --> 01:10:07,508 Updating. 983 01:10:07,510 --> 01:10:08,779 Updating. 984 01:10:09,112 --> 01:10:09,712 Updating. 985 01:10:10,647 --> 01:10:12,045 I don't need it anyway. 986 01:10:12,047 --> 01:10:13,517 Updating. 987 01:10:14,017 --> 01:10:14,781 Updating. 988 01:10:14,783 --> 01:10:15,816 Bash, what have you done? 989 01:10:15,818 --> 01:10:16,685 Updating. 990 01:10:16,687 --> 01:10:18,852 You're so much hotter in person. 991 01:10:18,854 --> 01:10:20,823 This is why she's been acting so crazy. 992 01:10:21,957 --> 01:10:27,363 Her strength, her emotion, her sex drive, seriously? 993 01:10:27,964 --> 01:10:29,196 These are all way too high. 994 01:10:29,198 --> 01:10:30,033 Updating. 995 01:10:30,567 --> 01:10:31,699 Updating. 996 01:10:31,701 --> 01:10:34,067 Oh shit, you changed her relationship status? 997 01:10:34,069 --> 01:10:37,540 It's just one more thing you're going to lose to me, Vag. 998 01:10:38,474 --> 01:10:39,807 Bash, you don't understand. 999 01:10:39,809 --> 01:10:41,812 If she's in a relationship with you... 1000 01:10:48,050 --> 01:10:50,586 Oh, you are intense, baby. 1001 01:10:51,220 --> 01:10:54,325 Don't use that word. 1002 01:10:54,825 --> 01:10:56,327 I'm so sorry, baby. 1003 01:10:56,827 --> 01:10:57,991 I was just kidding. 1004 01:10:57,993 --> 01:10:58,793 I didn't mean it. 1005 01:10:58,795 --> 01:10:59,459 Simon, this bitch is crazy. 1006 01:10:59,461 --> 01:11:01,799 I just want to talk. 1007 01:11:02,465 --> 01:11:03,464 Where are you going? 1008 01:11:03,466 --> 01:11:04,367 What are you doing? 1009 01:11:32,761 --> 01:11:33,897 Oh shit. 1010 01:11:35,130 --> 01:11:39,502 Well, I did not see this evening taking this turn. 1011 01:11:39,903 --> 01:11:42,406 What do we do? 1012 01:11:42,872 --> 01:11:43,737 Do we call 9-1-1? 1013 01:11:43,739 --> 01:11:44,539 No. 1014 01:11:44,541 --> 01:11:45,339 Hell no. 1015 01:11:45,341 --> 01:11:46,441 We're not going to do that. 1016 01:11:46,443 --> 01:11:47,275 We're going to do what teenagers always do 1017 01:11:47,277 --> 01:11:49,947 in a situation like this, run. 1018 01:11:58,854 --> 01:12:01,524 That's my house. 1019 01:12:02,125 --> 01:12:03,790 So, what happened back there? 1020 01:12:03,792 --> 01:12:04,928 Who is that lady? 1021 01:12:05,795 --> 01:12:08,165 Honestly, it's a long, long story. 1022 01:12:12,269 --> 01:12:13,137 Tell me later? 1023 01:12:30,086 --> 01:12:32,619 OK guys, so the next project that we're 1024 01:12:32,621 --> 01:12:36,559 going to be working on this year, it's called Stan's Face. 1025 01:12:37,661 --> 01:12:40,697 Yes, yes, I know you guys are all very excited. 1026 01:12:41,864 --> 01:12:44,201 The basic premises, I wake up every morning 1027 01:12:45,100 --> 01:12:49,439 and take a new picture of my face. 1028 01:12:52,809 --> 01:12:54,578 Dude, that chick was so hot. 1029 01:12:55,245 --> 01:12:56,977 You and Simon with college chicks? 1030 01:12:56,979 --> 01:12:57,744 Epic, bro. 1031 01:12:57,746 --> 01:13:00,917 Dude, are you kidding me? 1032 01:13:03,853 --> 01:13:06,089 That's called evidence, son. 1033 01:13:06,355 --> 01:13:07,925 Hey. 1034 01:13:08,692 --> 01:13:10,624 How's your shoulder, baby? 1035 01:13:10,626 --> 01:13:12,860 You know how I feel about that word, sweet heart. 1036 01:13:28,144 --> 01:13:29,680 How you doing Simon? 1037 01:13:33,817 --> 01:13:34,649 College girl? 1038 01:13:34,651 --> 01:13:39,786 Nice bro. 1039 01:13:39,788 --> 01:13:40,657 Genius, right? 1040 01:13:47,831 --> 01:13:50,501 Simon, what are you doing here? 1041 01:13:51,635 --> 01:13:55,639 Better question is, what are you doing in my seat? 1042 01:13:56,105 --> 01:13:57,105 Don't look at me. 1043 01:13:57,107 --> 01:13:59,510 Get out of the man's seat. 1044 01:13:59,776 --> 01:14:07,080 Oh. 1045 01:14:07,082 --> 01:14:09,252 Celia, care to do that honors? 1046 01:14:10,386 --> 01:14:13,087 Since Stanley has stepped down as intern president, 1047 01:14:13,089 --> 01:14:15,692 I would like to nominate Simon for president of FMSDA. 1048 01:14:16,126 --> 01:14:17,661 Who will second? 1049 01:14:21,764 --> 01:14:23,099 Great. 1050 01:14:23,767 --> 01:14:24,999 Let's get started. 1051 01:14:25,001 --> 01:14:29,639 I've been working on this really awesome program. 1052 01:14:37,080 --> 01:14:41,084 Scene 70, take one, marker. 1053 01:14:48,724 --> 01:14:51,027 All right, you ready? 1054 01:14:51,760 --> 01:14:53,196 Ready over there, Tony? 1055 01:14:53,729 --> 01:14:54,697 All right. 1056 01:14:55,064 --> 01:14:56,098 And action. 1057 01:15:01,705 --> 01:15:03,774 I forgot my line. 1058 01:15:04,373 --> 01:15:05,742 Oh shit, we're doing a line? 1059 01:15:06,041 --> 01:15:06,776 Sorry. 1060 01:15:07,042 --> 01:15:07,808 Cut. 1061 01:15:07,810 --> 01:15:09,779 I'm sorry. 1062 01:15:10,380 --> 01:15:13,750 Greetings, blah, blah, blah. 1063 01:15:14,050 --> 01:15:15,619 Sorry. 1064 01:15:16,019 --> 01:15:17,154 You're gross. 1065 01:15:22,725 --> 01:15:25,696 OK guys... 1066 01:15:27,229 --> 01:15:31,367 Full disclosure, think about... blah, blah, blah. 1067 01:15:34,370 --> 01:15:35,839 OK, what I just said was a lie. 1068 01:15:36,505 --> 01:15:37,740 But that's not... Shit. 1069 01:15:38,006 --> 01:15:39,609 OK. 1070 01:15:40,343 --> 01:15:42,278 OK, the thing I just said was a lie. 1071 01:15:43,011 --> 01:15:44,747 About Bash not... shit. 1072 01:15:45,014 --> 01:15:46,112 OK. 1073 01:15:46,114 --> 01:15:46,780 About me not caring what Bash does to me. 1074 01:15:46,782 --> 01:15:47,414 All right, I got it. 1075 01:15:47,416 --> 01:15:48,615 Blah, blah, blah. 1076 01:15:48,617 --> 01:15:50,884 You can bet your ass I'm going to tell everybody 1077 01:15:50,886 --> 01:15:57,024 that they did. 1078 01:15:57,026 --> 01:15:59,261 Because she has to remove it, right? 1079 01:15:59,528 --> 01:15:59,927 No. 1080 01:15:59,929 --> 01:16:00,962 No? 1081 01:16:00,964 --> 01:16:03,364 No she does not have to [inaudible]... 1082 01:16:03,366 --> 01:16:04,231 Oh, so it doesn't matter... 1083 01:16:04,233 --> 01:16:08,638 We're not making a pornography. 1084 01:16:09,205 --> 01:16:13,276 Contrary to popular belief. 1085 01:16:21,050 --> 01:16:25,689 We're going to get real weird with this one, all right? 1086 01:16:26,488 --> 01:16:28,890 Wait until I get off on the idea that she's 1087 01:16:28,892 --> 01:16:30,760 going to be the first one... 1088 01:16:34,997 --> 01:16:37,166 I totally get off on the idea of the first girl... oh my God. 1089 01:16:38,201 --> 01:16:41,805 I totally get off on the idea of... oh my God. 1090 01:16:42,171 --> 01:16:45,142 Oh my God. 1091 01:16:45,875 --> 01:16:48,845 Oh man I almost had it. 1092 01:16:49,144 --> 01:16:50,143 Shit. 1093 01:16:50,145 --> 01:16:52,180 Why is this line so hard? 1094 01:17:00,122 --> 01:17:02,858 What are we doing right now? 1095 01:17:03,459 --> 01:17:06,462 Scene A71, Frank, take one. 1096 01:17:10,433 --> 01:17:13,970 I just lost my thing-inity. 1097 01:17:14,571 --> 01:17:15,805 Whatever that is. 1098 01:17:16,104 --> 01:17:17,707 Slate. 1099 01:17:18,107 --> 01:17:19,242 Slate-inity. 1100 01:17:27,082 --> 01:17:28,415 Who's my little buddy? 1101 01:17:28,417 --> 01:17:29,986 You know what we're going to do? 1102 01:17:31,054 --> 01:17:33,087 You're going to type the buttons, 1103 01:17:33,089 --> 01:17:34,254 you're going to make it happen... 1104 01:17:39,528 --> 01:17:41,027 It is your will. 1105 01:17:41,029 --> 01:17:44,434 It is God's work that you do this. 1106 01:17:45,068 --> 01:17:46,436 It is your fate. 1107 01:17:47,002 --> 01:17:48,035 Do you see? 1108 01:17:48,037 --> 01:17:49,740 The computer tells you. 1109 01:17:50,340 --> 01:17:53,443 It is if it is speaking to us. 1110 01:17:56,479 --> 01:18:00,313 OK. 1111 01:18:02,585 --> 01:18:04,421 I was actually going to say I was thinking 1112 01:18:05,188 --> 01:18:06,286 about a different direction. 1113 01:18:06,288 --> 01:18:08,021 I was thinking about that. 1114 01:18:08,023 --> 01:18:10,024 After he leaves, I go over there. 1115 01:18:10,026 --> 01:18:11,292 I start making out with Stanley. 1116 01:18:11,294 --> 01:18:12,496 Oh my God. 1117 01:18:13,263 --> 01:18:14,294 Why is everyone laughing? 1118 01:18:14,296 --> 01:18:15,495 That was stupid. 1119 01:18:15,497 --> 01:18:17,164 Why is everyone laughing? 1120 01:18:17,166 --> 01:18:18,365 All right, so... 1121 01:18:18,367 --> 01:18:19,769 No one's laughing. 1122 01:18:20,435 --> 01:18:23,005 Take 32, [inaudible], take three. 1123 01:18:29,946 --> 01:18:30,913 The clacking things. 1124 01:18:38,955 --> 01:18:40,023 57 Charlie, take one. 1125 01:18:40,924 --> 01:18:41,892 That's a lot of Charlie's. 1126 01:18:42,925 --> 01:18:45,895 That's 57 Charlie all over the place. 1127 01:18:49,998 --> 01:18:51,033 Oh fuck, dude. 1128 01:18:51,466 --> 01:18:54,004 No. 1129 01:18:54,336 --> 01:18:55,335 Acting. 1130 01:18:55,337 --> 01:18:56,273 No, OK. 1131 01:18:56,939 --> 01:18:59,475 42 Dallas, take one. 1132 01:19:00,276 --> 01:19:01,478 It should always be dollars. 1133 01:19:02,245 --> 01:19:03,945 Dollars, dollars, dollars. 1134 01:19:03,947 --> 01:19:05,448 Dollar bills, y'all. 1135 01:19:06,215 --> 01:19:07,548 Everything is about Stanley. 1136 01:19:07,550 --> 01:19:09,482 Everything is about Stanley. 1137 01:19:09,484 --> 01:19:13,823 Stanley is starring in his own movie. 1138 01:19:17,193 --> 01:19:18,191 Oh, right, right. 1139 01:19:21,965 --> 01:19:27,267 I got caught up being popular and being... 1140 01:19:27,269 --> 01:19:29,371 it totally fell. 1141 01:19:31,373 --> 01:19:32,843 And... 1142 01:19:35,745 --> 01:19:42,318 Head to scene 68, your anus, take one. 1143 01:19:42,684 --> 01:19:43,285 And action. 1144 01:19:43,752 --> 01:19:44,985 Wait, what are we doing? 1145 01:19:44,987 --> 01:19:46,255 What are we doing? 1146 01:20:05,544 --> 01:20:10,544 Subtitles by explosiveskull 73855

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.