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1
00:00:01,025 --> 00:00:02,545
It's the 93rd minute.
2
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England are 2-1 down to Greece.
3
00:00:04,785 --> 00:00:07,745
David Beckham needs to score
this free kick
4
00:00:07,745 --> 00:00:10,665
to send England through to
the World Cup finals.
5
00:00:10,665 --> 00:00:15,025
Bang! He bends it over the wall,
straight into the top-left corner.
6
00:00:15,025 --> 00:00:17,345
Absolutely brilliant.
7
00:00:17,345 --> 00:00:18,625
You buying anything?
8
00:00:18,625 --> 00:00:20,665
Oh! Um, I'll have...
9
00:00:22,585 --> 00:00:24,305
I'll have a pear.
10
00:00:25,825 --> 00:00:27,025
One pair.
11
00:00:28,265 --> 00:00:29,945
Oh...
12
00:00:29,945 --> 00:00:31,625
I'll sleep on it.
13
00:00:37,225 --> 00:00:38,945
David Beckham lines up the free kick.
14
00:00:40,145 --> 00:00:42,145
The weight of a nation
on his shoulders.
15
00:00:51,385 --> 00:00:53,105
ARGH! Argh.
16
00:00:53,105 --> 00:00:54,825
Agh.
17
00:00:54,825 --> 00:00:55,945
Argh!
18
00:00:56,945 --> 00:00:58,065
Ooh.
19
00:00:59,145 --> 00:01:00,945
Blimey.
20
00:01:00,945 --> 00:01:02,585
Ooh, you've got...
21
00:01:02,585 --> 00:01:03,985
Look out for that.
22
00:01:26,945 --> 00:01:29,505
There's no way of getting
the amulet back.
23
00:01:29,505 --> 00:01:31,265
I can't get home so now what?
24
00:01:31,265 --> 00:01:33,105
Ooh! Let me tell you.
25
00:01:34,385 --> 00:01:36,105
No, honestly, Barbara, please, don't.
26
00:01:36,105 --> 00:01:37,425
My new purchase.
27
00:01:37,425 --> 00:01:39,705
The Sands of Time!
28
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Didn't they predict
the plague of cows?
29
00:01:41,705 --> 00:01:43,305
Yep, to the nearest half hour.
30
00:01:43,305 --> 00:01:46,625
You see, Brian, I've worked out why
I didn't get into the Seers Guild.
31
00:01:46,625 --> 00:01:49,585
It's not my talent,
it's my equipment.
32
00:01:49,585 --> 00:01:51,625
Yeah. Yeah, that'll be it.
33
00:01:51,625 --> 00:01:53,305
It's just sand.
34
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That is a powerful fortune-telling
device, not to be abused.
35
00:01:57,025 --> 00:01:58,745
I would never do that.
36
00:01:58,745 --> 00:02:00,825
Rule number one
of the Seers Guild...
37
00:02:00,825 --> 00:02:02,225
Use of the toilets
is only for members?
38
00:02:02,225 --> 00:02:05,305
..never exploit your gift
for personal gain.
39
00:02:05,305 --> 00:02:07,105
Krunt!
40
00:02:08,785 --> 00:02:10,745
All sorted?
Absolutely.
41
00:02:10,745 --> 00:02:13,065
As ordered, one, barely second-hand,
42
00:02:13,065 --> 00:02:15,625
formatically-enhanced
sausage machine -
43
00:02:15,625 --> 00:02:16,865
completely legal.
44
00:02:16,865 --> 00:02:19,025
It definitely works, does it?
Yeah!
45
00:02:19,025 --> 00:02:20,225
Watch this.
46
00:02:21,545 --> 00:02:22,665
Hey!
47
00:02:43,905 --> 00:02:45,505
Mmm, not bad.
48
00:02:45,505 --> 00:02:46,585
That'll bring in some business.
49
00:02:46,585 --> 00:02:47,825
what do we say, 50 sovereigns?
50
00:02:47,825 --> 00:02:49,225
50?!
Alright, 60.
51
00:02:49,225 --> 00:02:51,225
Hang on...
I can go higher, Herman.
52
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60, done.
53
00:02:53,185 --> 00:02:54,585
This calls for a drink.
54
00:02:54,585 --> 00:02:57,905
Fix me a large Rhubarb Seizure,
please.
55
00:02:57,905 --> 00:03:00,545
And the cash.
I'm taking it off your tab.
56
00:03:00,545 --> 00:03:02,305
So that means you still owe me.
57
00:03:02,305 --> 00:03:04,865
Herman, I need that money.
58
00:03:04,865 --> 00:03:06,465
That explains why Slasher Morgan
came in.
59
00:03:06,465 --> 00:03:08,905
Very anxious to talk to you,
she was.
60
00:03:08,905 --> 00:03:12,905
Hang on, not "talk to you,"
hurt you.
61
00:03:12,905 --> 00:03:14,745
Yeah, that's it.
62
00:03:14,745 --> 00:03:15,865
Said she'd call...
63
00:03:18,345 --> 00:03:19,665
How does he do that?
64
00:03:21,665 --> 00:03:23,225
Sausage?
No!
65
00:03:23,225 --> 00:03:24,785
Oh, God, no.
66
00:03:25,825 --> 00:03:26,865
Sausage?
67
00:03:26,865 --> 00:03:29,505
Not now, Herman, I never eat
just before a big occasion.
68
00:03:31,265 --> 00:03:32,385
Like this.
69
00:03:34,545 --> 00:03:35,865
It's my new campaign.
70
00:03:36,905 --> 00:03:38,145
Save the throck!
71
00:03:42,345 --> 00:03:45,305
Alright...what's a throck?
72
00:03:45,305 --> 00:03:48,945
It is a persecuted flightless bird
and its numbers are in decline.
73
00:03:48,945 --> 00:03:50,425
Horrible things.
74
00:03:50,425 --> 00:03:52,265
I was attacked by one as a child
75
00:03:52,265 --> 00:03:54,585
and to this day
I still can't wear feathers.
76
00:03:54,585 --> 00:03:55,625
Or beaks.
77
00:03:57,585 --> 00:04:00,385
Do you know, they actually grow
a new set of teeth every five days?
78
00:04:00,385 --> 00:04:02,425
Why are you trying to save them?
79
00:04:02,425 --> 00:04:03,905
Desperate attempt to meet women.
80
00:04:06,585 --> 00:04:08,385
So, who's coming?
81
00:04:11,905 --> 00:04:13,025
Brian?
82
00:04:13,025 --> 00:04:15,505
Oh, do you know what,
I'd love to, Steg, honestly.
83
00:04:15,505 --> 00:04:16,585
Thank you.
No.
84
00:04:16,585 --> 00:04:20,385
The thing is,
Barbara's got some new sand.
85
00:04:22,825 --> 00:04:24,065
Your loss!
86
00:04:27,105 --> 00:04:31,025
Ooh, it's incredible, it's so clear!
87
00:04:31,025 --> 00:04:32,905
I'm going home?
You are staying.
88
00:04:32,905 --> 00:04:36,585
Because you, Brian,
are destined for greatness.
89
00:04:36,585 --> 00:04:39,505
The sands say that soon you will be
90
00:04:39,505 --> 00:04:42,225
standing in front of a mighty army.
91
00:04:42,225 --> 00:04:44,505
Oh, really, yeah?
92
00:04:44,505 --> 00:04:46,785
You are not alone in your journey -
93
00:04:46,785 --> 00:04:47,945
there is a woman.
94
00:04:49,145 --> 00:04:50,985
But who?
95
00:04:50,985 --> 00:04:52,385
Is it you, Barbara?
96
00:04:52,385 --> 00:04:56,225
Ooh! Um, you know...it could be.
97
00:04:56,225 --> 00:04:59,585
Um, I hadn't actually thought
about that.
98
00:04:59,585 --> 00:05:01,025
Um...
99
00:05:01,025 --> 00:05:03,625
OK. Well, you and this woman -
100
00:05:03,625 --> 00:05:05,985
let's just say it's me -
101
00:05:05,985 --> 00:05:09,225
you are joined together by fate...
102
00:05:09,225 --> 00:05:13,065
..bound as one.
103
00:05:13,065 --> 00:05:17,545
And, Brian,
you are clutching something.
104
00:05:17,545 --> 00:05:21,745
A tiny bundle!
105
00:05:21,745 --> 00:05:24,185
Could it be...
106
00:05:24,185 --> 00:05:25,825
..a baby?
107
00:05:25,825 --> 00:05:27,265
Do you know what,
I've suddenly decided
108
00:05:27,265 --> 00:05:29,505
I really want to save some throcks.
109
00:05:29,505 --> 00:05:31,025
So, I propose that
110
00:05:31,025 --> 00:05:32,705
the executive committee
111
00:05:32,705 --> 00:05:34,865
be headed by myself.
112
00:05:34,865 --> 00:05:38,065
Um, would anyone
like to second that?
113
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Anybody?
114
00:05:44,145 --> 00:05:45,505
Bri?
115
00:05:47,545 --> 00:05:49,265
Seconded!
116
00:05:50,345 --> 00:05:51,505
I'm incredibly honoured.
117
00:05:51,505 --> 00:05:53,745
Is this the meeting for
'Protect the Throck'?
118
00:05:53,745 --> 00:05:54,745
No.
119
00:05:54,745 --> 00:05:56,785
It is the meeting, however,
120
00:05:56,785 --> 00:05:59,105
to 'Save the Throck',
121
00:05:59,105 --> 00:06:01,985
which I believe is what you meant.
122
00:06:03,065 --> 00:06:06,305
Put your name...
123
00:06:06,305 --> 00:06:08,825
..and address on the petition.
124
00:06:09,905 --> 00:06:11,425
So...
125
00:06:14,465 --> 00:06:16,145
..Effandra...
126
00:06:17,465 --> 00:06:18,785
Lovely name.
127
00:06:22,745 --> 00:06:24,345
..what's your experience
with throcks?
128
00:06:24,345 --> 00:06:26,585
I absolutely adore them!
129
00:06:27,825 --> 00:06:30,465
Especially Mr Wuffles - he's my pet.
130
00:06:35,785 --> 00:06:37,145
What, you've got a pet throck?
131
00:06:37,145 --> 00:06:38,745
Yeah.
In your house?
132
00:06:38,745 --> 00:06:39,785
Yes.
133
00:06:39,785 --> 00:06:41,345
Isn't that a bit dangerous?
134
00:06:41,345 --> 00:06:42,745
Oh, no, he's a sweetie!
135
00:06:42,745 --> 00:06:44,265
Honestly, you'd totally love him.
136
00:06:44,265 --> 00:06:47,065
Alright. So, if I can continue?
137
00:06:47,065 --> 00:06:52,465
So, one of the key aims
of the campaign -
138
00:06:52,465 --> 00:06:54,145
my campaign -
139
00:06:54,145 --> 00:06:58,105
is to spread accurate information
about throcks...
140
00:06:58,105 --> 00:07:01,545
Oh! Like how they way they grow
a new set of teeth every five days.
141
00:07:01,545 --> 00:07:02,825
Well, yeah.
142
00:07:02,825 --> 00:07:05,105
And how their numbers
are actually in decline.
143
00:07:05,105 --> 00:07:06,305
Yeah.
144
00:07:06,305 --> 00:07:09,625
Do you know, it is so refreshing to
meet a man who cares about throcks.
145
00:07:10,745 --> 00:07:12,145
He doesn't know
anything about throcks!
146
00:07:12,145 --> 00:07:15,065
He's not even from here,
he's from a parallel world.
147
00:07:16,225 --> 00:07:17,585
No!
148
00:07:17,585 --> 00:07:18,985
Really?
149
00:07:18,985 --> 00:07:22,145
Well, I think technically,
from another dimension.
150
00:07:22,145 --> 00:07:23,585
I'm not quite sure how...
151
00:07:23,585 --> 00:07:26,065
He hates it here, don't you, Brian?
152
00:07:26,065 --> 00:07:27,745
Wants to go back.
153
00:07:30,465 --> 00:07:34,145
So, Effandra,
are you interested in, um...
154
00:07:34,145 --> 00:07:35,625
..musical theatre?
155
00:07:37,025 --> 00:07:40,105
Actually, I think I better mingle.
Ah.
156
00:07:45,265 --> 00:07:48,785
It must be very hard for you,
so alone.
157
00:07:48,785 --> 00:07:49,985
Yeah, I guess so.
158
00:07:49,985 --> 00:07:52,025
I try not to dwell on it, really.
159
00:07:52,025 --> 00:07:53,465
I'm alone!
160
00:07:53,465 --> 00:07:56,545
In fact, as a persecuted minority,
I'm very alone.
161
00:07:56,545 --> 00:07:58,425
Sorry, I've got to go.
162
00:07:58,425 --> 00:08:00,305
Mr Wuffles will be wanting
his num-nums.
163
00:08:04,865 --> 00:08:06,745
It was really nice meeting you,
Brian.
164
00:08:06,745 --> 00:08:07,905
Oh, yeah, you too.
165
00:08:07,905 --> 00:08:09,625
Perhaps we could talk a bit...
Bye, Stan!
166
00:08:09,625 --> 00:08:10,745
It's Steg.
167
00:08:10,745 --> 00:08:11,785
See you, Effandra!
168
00:08:17,705 --> 00:08:18,985
So the dance begins.
169
00:08:23,145 --> 00:08:24,825
"Num-nums."
170
00:08:30,345 --> 00:08:31,705
Give us a hand, Brian!
171
00:08:35,345 --> 00:08:39,225
The personal effects
of one Mrs Mabel Tappet.
172
00:08:39,225 --> 00:08:40,825
You're doing house clearances now?
173
00:08:40,825 --> 00:08:43,465
Magical item retrieval
and assessment.
174
00:08:43,465 --> 00:08:45,305
She has no further use for them.
175
00:08:45,305 --> 00:08:46,785
Oh, when did she die?
176
00:08:46,785 --> 00:08:48,225
Any day now, I should think.
177
00:08:50,425 --> 00:08:52,785
Anyway, there must be
something in here.
178
00:08:52,785 --> 00:08:53,985
Give us a sec.
179
00:08:55,145 --> 00:08:57,865
What's that? Bit of garlic?
180
00:08:57,865 --> 00:08:59,825
Whoa, Brian!
181
00:08:59,825 --> 00:09:01,345
That's quankleroot.
182
00:09:01,345 --> 00:09:03,545
Extremely powerful sedative.
183
00:09:03,545 --> 00:09:06,025
One little nibble
could knock out a horse.
184
00:09:07,665 --> 00:09:09,705
Or an old lady.
185
00:09:09,705 --> 00:09:11,585
Mm.
186
00:09:11,585 --> 00:09:13,985
Here, Herman, do the honours.
187
00:09:13,985 --> 00:09:15,385
Oh, I love this.
188
00:09:15,385 --> 00:09:17,665
This is like Storage Hunters.
189
00:09:17,665 --> 00:09:18,865
What's that?
190
00:09:18,865 --> 00:09:21,945
It's a TV show...
191
00:09:21,945 --> 00:09:24,785
..that I present.
192
00:09:26,145 --> 00:09:28,985
This should solve
all my money worries.
193
00:09:34,505 --> 00:09:35,985
Whoa!
194
00:09:35,985 --> 00:09:38,745
A hat of invisibility.
195
00:09:38,745 --> 00:09:41,825
Got to be worth 10 sovs.
196
00:09:41,825 --> 00:09:42,985
He's gone!
197
00:09:42,985 --> 00:09:46,905
He's gone! Completely invisible.
198
00:09:46,905 --> 00:09:48,465
Am I really invisible?
199
00:09:48,465 --> 00:09:50,425
Well, not completely.
200
00:09:50,425 --> 00:09:52,625
Although,
I can't see the top of your head.
201
00:09:52,625 --> 00:09:54,025
Right.
202
00:09:56,505 --> 00:09:57,865
What about this?
203
00:09:57,865 --> 00:09:59,545
Nah, worthless. Chuck it.
204
00:10:04,105 --> 00:10:09,065
Ah! Who disturbs the dreamless sleep
of Maladorn,
205
00:10:09,065 --> 00:10:10,865
element and spirit?
206
00:10:10,865 --> 00:10:13,625
By the leathery balls of Krunt!
207
00:10:13,625 --> 00:10:15,585
It's a fire sprite.
208
00:10:15,585 --> 00:10:17,425
Silence mortal!
209
00:10:17,425 --> 00:10:21,945
I will grant the desire
of whom so ever summoned me?
210
00:10:21,945 --> 00:10:23,985
Ah, yeah!
211
00:10:26,305 --> 00:10:27,625
I've done it!
212
00:10:27,625 --> 00:10:30,345
I got a wish. I got a wish, man.
213
00:10:30,345 --> 00:10:31,705
I got a wish!
214
00:10:31,705 --> 00:10:32,865
The wish...
215
00:10:34,465 --> 00:10:36,105
..is yours.
216
00:10:38,985 --> 00:10:39,985
Really?
217
00:10:39,985 --> 00:10:42,745
Yes, insignificant pustule!
218
00:10:42,745 --> 00:10:44,425
Claim your wish.
219
00:10:44,425 --> 00:10:45,745
No!
220
00:10:45,745 --> 00:10:47,745
I could've paid back Slasher Morgan.
221
00:10:47,745 --> 00:10:48,865
I knew it!
222
00:10:48,865 --> 00:10:51,105
You're destined for greatness,
Brian.
223
00:10:51,105 --> 00:10:53,585
Who wants a celebratory sausage?
224
00:10:58,025 --> 00:10:59,585
Shut it!
225
00:10:59,585 --> 00:11:03,185
A magic aura has been detected
in the vicinity.
226
00:11:03,185 --> 00:11:04,585
It's him. He's got a wish.
227
00:11:04,585 --> 00:11:06,425
I am not an aura.
228
00:11:06,425 --> 00:11:09,025
I am an elemental spirit,
229
00:11:09,025 --> 00:11:10,505
I did say that earlier.
230
00:11:10,505 --> 00:11:15,665
Now, claim your wish and free me!
231
00:11:16,945 --> 00:11:21,185
What a day - first someone assaults
the ambassador for Flint...
232
00:11:21,185 --> 00:11:23,345
Kicked right in the shell,
broad daylight.
233
00:11:23,345 --> 00:11:24,705
..now this.
234
00:11:24,705 --> 00:11:27,305
Chestnut,
erect a barricade immediately.
235
00:11:27,305 --> 00:11:29,305
On it, Hawthorn.
236
00:11:29,305 --> 00:11:33,425
The incident location will be
guarded until the wish is fulfilled.
237
00:11:33,425 --> 00:11:35,865
Remember, no rebellious wishes.
238
00:11:35,865 --> 00:11:39,985
Nothing - and I mean nothing -
239
00:11:39,985 --> 00:11:41,265
to harm the protector.
240
00:11:45,705 --> 00:11:46,825
Fancy a sausage?
241
00:11:46,825 --> 00:11:49,745
Yes! Bring me sausages.
242
00:11:49,745 --> 00:11:53,545
So, Brian,
what are you going to wish for?
243
00:11:53,545 --> 00:11:55,305
I mean, you could have anything.
244
00:11:55,305 --> 00:11:57,385
Anything?
Mm.
245
00:11:57,385 --> 00:11:59,305
Yeah, I'd go for 1,000 sovereigns.
Herman!
246
00:11:59,305 --> 00:12:01,025
Brian is destined for greatness.
247
00:12:02,345 --> 00:12:04,945
I think he'll aim
a little higher than that.
248
00:12:04,945 --> 00:12:07,345
Of course. 2,000 sovereigns.
249
00:12:07,345 --> 00:12:08,945
I can't believe I've been so lucky.
250
00:12:08,945 --> 00:12:10,385
I think what Brian is trying to say
251
00:12:10,385 --> 00:12:12,065
is he can't believe I'VE been
so lucky.
252
00:12:12,065 --> 00:12:15,865
Because the wish is basically mine,
Brian, and you nicked it!
253
00:12:15,865 --> 00:12:17,345
Hang on, I wasn't thinking straight,
was I?
254
00:12:17,345 --> 00:12:18,425
3,000!
255
00:12:18,425 --> 00:12:20,945
I know what I want to wish for.
I want to go home.
256
00:12:20,945 --> 00:12:23,385
Huh, I don't think so, Brian.
257
00:12:23,385 --> 00:12:24,705
That's not in your future.
258
00:12:24,705 --> 00:12:26,745
Well, it is
'cause that's what I'm gonna do.
259
00:12:26,745 --> 00:12:29,825
No.
260
00:12:29,825 --> 00:12:31,865
You want to give the wish back to me
really, don't you, Brian?
261
00:12:31,865 --> 00:12:33,705
I want to go home.
Good idea.
262
00:12:33,705 --> 00:12:35,265
Bye!
Your Destiny, Brian.
263
00:12:35,265 --> 00:12:36,865
The wish is mine really...
264
00:12:36,865 --> 00:12:39,025
3,000 and a pint glass that
never runs out!
265
00:12:39,025 --> 00:12:41,025
This is serious, OK?
Go now. Go!
266
00:12:41,025 --> 00:12:42,785
Give me my wish back!
3,500.
267
00:12:42,785 --> 00:12:44,465
Stop it!
268
00:12:49,545 --> 00:12:51,225
I need some time to think.
269
00:12:51,225 --> 00:12:52,985
Crazier than normal!
270
00:12:58,025 --> 00:13:00,025
I predicted it!
271
00:13:00,025 --> 00:13:03,665
I actually predicted it.
The sands of time foretold it.
272
00:13:03,665 --> 00:13:08,145
Brian is going to stand in front of
a mighty army...
273
00:13:08,145 --> 00:13:10,945
..with me and our bundle.
274
00:13:10,945 --> 00:13:13,265
Ah, this is all too exciting!
275
00:13:13,265 --> 00:13:16,385
Barbara, why don't you have
a little nibble on that?
276
00:13:16,385 --> 00:13:19,465
Ooh, what is it?
277
00:13:19,465 --> 00:13:20,865
Quankleroot.
278
00:13:22,225 --> 00:13:24,145
But doesn't that mean that...?
279
00:13:26,105 --> 00:13:27,465
Yeah.
280
00:13:46,345 --> 00:13:47,505
Oh...
281
00:13:49,985 --> 00:13:52,545
..God!
282
00:13:52,545 --> 00:13:53,865
Brian?
283
00:13:55,025 --> 00:13:56,385
Effandra!
284
00:13:56,385 --> 00:13:58,945
What are you doing here all alone?
285
00:13:58,945 --> 00:14:02,385
Just, you know,
trying to clear my head.
286
00:14:02,385 --> 00:14:04,585
Oh, me too.
287
00:14:04,585 --> 00:14:05,865
This is my favourite spot.
288
00:14:05,865 --> 00:14:07,785
Yes, it's beautiful.
289
00:14:10,025 --> 00:14:12,105
What are you doing now?
290
00:14:12,105 --> 00:14:13,305
Nothing.
291
00:14:13,305 --> 00:14:14,625
Buy you a drink?
292
00:14:14,625 --> 00:14:15,705
Yeah, alright!
293
00:14:24,585 --> 00:14:26,385
Howell!
294
00:14:29,745 --> 00:14:31,105
Morgan wants to see you.
295
00:14:32,465 --> 00:14:33,865
Howell!
296
00:14:46,665 --> 00:14:48,225
So, there we were,
297
00:14:48,225 --> 00:14:52,105
just four ordinary lads from
Liverpool who had changed the world.
298
00:14:53,305 --> 00:14:56,385
John, Paul, George and Brian.
299
00:14:57,385 --> 00:14:59,105
And then you invented rap?
300
00:14:59,105 --> 00:15:00,305
True dat.
301
00:15:00,305 --> 00:15:03,545
Yeah, crazy days...
302
00:15:03,545 --> 00:15:05,105
Anyway, enough about me.
303
00:15:06,225 --> 00:15:07,705
Tell me about your throck.
304
00:15:07,705 --> 00:15:10,545
Ah, I've had him
right since he was an egg.
305
00:15:10,545 --> 00:15:12,825
Honestly, I don't think
I could live without him.
306
00:15:12,825 --> 00:15:14,865
I think he's lucky you have you.
307
00:15:14,865 --> 00:15:19,225
Aww, Brian,
you say the nicest things!
308
00:15:21,105 --> 00:15:22,225
You alright?
309
00:15:22,225 --> 00:15:24,505
Music for the lady?
310
00:15:24,505 --> 00:15:25,625
He loves music.
311
00:15:25,625 --> 00:15:27,265
Word.
312
00:15:28,705 --> 00:15:29,905
Sure.
313
00:15:39,785 --> 00:15:41,145
Ba-dang!
314
00:15:41,145 --> 00:15:42,505
Aa-rah!
315
00:15:42,505 --> 00:15:44,225
Ooh-ah-ooh-ah-ooh-oh!
316
00:15:44,225 --> 00:15:45,985
Ah-yah, ba-dang!
317
00:15:45,985 --> 00:15:47,865
Ba-dang, ba-dang
318
00:15:47,865 --> 00:15:51,665
Ba-dang, ba-dang
Ba-dang, ba-dang
319
00:15:51,665 --> 00:15:54,385
Ba-dang, ah-reeb, ah-reeb!
320
00:15:54,385 --> 00:15:55,865
Wah-wah
321
00:15:55,865 --> 00:15:58,465
Ba-dang, ba-dang, ba-dang!
322
00:16:04,865 --> 00:16:05,985
Good morning, Howell.
323
00:16:08,265 --> 00:16:09,465
Morgan.
324
00:16:10,785 --> 00:16:12,825
What a lovely surprise.
325
00:16:12,825 --> 00:16:15,065
I just wondered...
326
00:16:15,065 --> 00:16:18,985
..could I boil you alive
and feed you to my pigs?
327
00:16:20,185 --> 00:16:23,625
Or do you have the money you owe me?
328
00:16:23,625 --> 00:16:24,665
Yeah, I have!
329
00:16:25,945 --> 00:16:27,585
Not with me.
330
00:16:27,585 --> 00:16:33,825
Um, in fact, it's still
in other people's pockets.
331
00:16:33,825 --> 00:16:37,145
But I assure you,
in a mere matter of days...
332
00:16:37,145 --> 00:16:39,185
Oh, Howell...
333
00:16:40,265 --> 00:16:43,945
..I didn't want you to die like this.
334
00:16:45,305 --> 00:16:46,905
Uh, I got a wish!
335
00:16:46,905 --> 00:16:48,345
Yeah.
336
00:16:48,345 --> 00:16:50,425
You're telling me you've got a wish?
337
00:16:50,425 --> 00:16:52,545
Yeah! And you can have it.
338
00:16:55,185 --> 00:16:58,425
Krunt's sake!
I'm down to my last three chairs.
339
00:16:58,425 --> 00:17:00,305
Bloody fairy is eating me
out of house and home.
340
00:17:00,305 --> 00:17:01,825
And he's not even paying.
341
00:17:03,065 --> 00:17:04,905
Slasher Morgan was in last night
looking for you.
342
00:17:04,905 --> 00:17:06,665
All in hand. Where's Brian?
343
00:17:06,665 --> 00:17:08,465
I've no idea. Try Barbara.
344
00:17:08,465 --> 00:17:12,945
Cor, that latest batch of
quankleroot is pretty poky.
345
00:17:12,945 --> 00:17:14,585
Barbara...
346
00:17:14,585 --> 00:17:16,305
Barbara.
347
00:17:16,305 --> 00:17:17,705
BARBARA!
348
00:17:24,505 --> 00:17:25,585
What?
349
00:17:25,585 --> 00:17:27,625
Oh, impressive.
350
00:17:27,625 --> 00:17:29,385
Do you know where Brian is?
351
00:17:30,705 --> 00:17:33,065
I don't even know where I am.
352
00:17:33,065 --> 00:17:34,305
What's happened?
353
00:17:34,305 --> 00:17:36,185
Oi! Where's my breakfast?
354
00:17:36,185 --> 00:17:37,825
Right away, sir.
355
00:17:39,345 --> 00:17:40,865
Brian!
356
00:17:40,865 --> 00:17:44,625
Everybody,
I have decided I am not going home.
357
00:17:44,625 --> 00:17:48,145
Ah, fantastic news!
358
00:17:48,145 --> 00:17:49,385
Can I have your wish?
359
00:17:49,385 --> 00:17:51,505
I've found a reason to stay.
360
00:17:51,505 --> 00:17:55,905
There she was right in front of me
this whole time
361
00:17:55,905 --> 00:17:57,385
and I didn't even notice.
362
00:17:58,345 --> 00:18:00,385
Effandra.
363
00:18:00,385 --> 00:18:01,585
Yay!
364
00:18:03,385 --> 00:18:05,785
I'm just going to go and celebrate
to the other room.
365
00:18:08,825 --> 00:18:11,305
So, Brian,
what are you using your wish for?
366
00:18:11,305 --> 00:18:14,225
I think it's clear what Brian
is planning to do,
367
00:18:14,225 --> 00:18:18,185
and may I say, Brian,
I am hugely grateful.
368
00:18:18,185 --> 00:18:20,505
Oh, no, no, no, no,
I'm still using my wish.
369
00:18:20,505 --> 00:18:21,745
Just not right now.
370
00:18:21,745 --> 00:18:26,705
It's nice to know if do want to go
home, I've got a wish in the bank.
371
00:18:26,705 --> 00:18:29,865
Which means you can probably
leave now, if you wanted to.
372
00:18:29,865 --> 00:18:31,625
Don't tell me what to do!
373
00:18:31,625 --> 00:18:34,265
I'll stay here
until the 24 hours is up.
374
00:18:34,265 --> 00:18:35,505
Alright, fine, whatever.
375
00:18:35,505 --> 00:18:36,705
Anyway...
376
00:18:36,705 --> 00:18:38,745
Sorry, what? 24 hours?
377
00:18:38,745 --> 00:18:42,145
Standard procedure -
24 hours for a wish.
378
00:18:42,145 --> 00:18:45,065
So, I have to make my wish today?
379
00:18:45,065 --> 00:18:46,145
Yep.
380
00:18:46,145 --> 00:18:48,265
Or, as I think we've agreed,
381
00:18:48,265 --> 00:18:51,105
I need to make this wish today.
382
00:18:51,105 --> 00:18:53,185
You've got till midday.
I know.
383
00:18:53,185 --> 00:18:56,585
I'll just wish for Effandra
to come with me.
384
00:18:56,585 --> 00:18:58,705
Don't rush into anything Brian.
385
00:18:58,705 --> 00:19:01,505
You can't take Effandra with you,
Brian. That's two wishes.
386
00:19:01,505 --> 00:19:02,865
No, it's not.
387
00:19:02,865 --> 00:19:04,945
I wish to go home with...
388
00:19:04,945 --> 00:19:07,585
'With'. See, that's two wishes.
389
00:19:07,585 --> 00:19:10,785
Alright then,
I wish for me and Effandra...
390
00:19:10,785 --> 00:19:12,825
'And'. That's the second wish.
Just, you know...
391
00:19:12,825 --> 00:19:13,905
Two.
392
00:19:13,905 --> 00:19:15,265
..oh, Brian,
you're in a pickle, mate.
393
00:19:16,585 --> 00:19:19,945
Actually, Brian,
I think I know a way
394
00:19:19,945 --> 00:19:23,945
we can make BOTH
your wishes come true.
395
00:19:30,465 --> 00:19:32,345
Hello?
Good morning!
396
00:19:32,345 --> 00:19:35,985
I am a travelling soothsayer
in your area for one day only.
397
00:19:35,985 --> 00:19:40,945
I am offering short-form divination
at a special offer of 50% off.
398
00:19:40,945 --> 00:19:43,545
Sorry, I'm a bit busy at the moment.
Thanks.
399
00:19:43,545 --> 00:19:45,825
90% off.
400
00:19:45,825 --> 00:19:47,465
Free. It's all free.
401
00:19:47,465 --> 00:19:48,785
I'll just come in, shall I?
402
00:19:55,465 --> 00:19:57,265
What do women want?
403
00:19:57,265 --> 00:19:59,185
A hero.
404
00:19:59,185 --> 00:20:02,105
Someone who can ride in
and save the day.
405
00:20:02,105 --> 00:20:03,665
It worked for Mrs Herman -
406
00:20:03,665 --> 00:20:06,505
swept off her feet
by a brave soldier.
407
00:20:08,185 --> 00:20:09,505
Haven't seen her since.
408
00:20:09,505 --> 00:20:12,265
Oi! More sausages.
409
00:20:12,265 --> 00:20:14,025
Right.
410
00:20:14,025 --> 00:20:15,945
Give me a hand with this table,
will you?
411
00:20:15,945 --> 00:20:19,745
Sorry, Herman, a man's got to dance.
412
00:20:24,305 --> 00:20:26,345
Ummm...
413
00:20:28,945 --> 00:20:30,825
..yes
414
00:20:30,825 --> 00:20:33,345
What is it?
I see changes ahead.
415
00:20:33,345 --> 00:20:35,705
Is there a new presence
in your life?
416
00:20:35,705 --> 00:20:37,585
A man called Brian?
417
00:20:37,585 --> 00:20:39,905
Brian, yes. He's amazing.
418
00:20:39,905 --> 00:20:41,185
Oh, dear. Death.
419
00:20:41,185 --> 00:20:43,025
Oh.
A painful death.
420
00:20:43,025 --> 00:20:45,265
Deceit, unhappiness.
421
00:20:45,265 --> 00:20:49,385
This Brian is going to cause you
a lot of unhappiness.
422
00:20:49,385 --> 00:20:50,825
No, never!
423
00:20:50,825 --> 00:20:52,905
Hm, I suggest a long journey.
424
00:20:52,905 --> 00:20:56,345
You should get the next coach
to Strooth.
425
00:20:56,345 --> 00:21:00,025
Actually, I have a timetable here
426
00:21:00,025 --> 00:21:02,225
and I've circled the next departure.
427
00:21:02,225 --> 00:21:05,425
And, ooh, I've got a spare ticket.
428
00:21:07,505 --> 00:21:10,145
I'm really sorry, but Mr Wuffles
429
00:21:10,145 --> 00:21:12,065
wants to come for his num-nums now,
so...
430
00:21:12,065 --> 00:21:13,825
Oh, yes, yes.
431
00:21:13,825 --> 00:21:15,425
I'd better go.
432
00:21:17,665 --> 00:21:19,865
Like I said, free of charge.
433
00:21:21,025 --> 00:21:22,425
And remember...
434
00:21:23,425 --> 00:21:26,105
..beware Brian!
435
00:21:27,905 --> 00:21:29,145
Bye!
436
00:21:31,665 --> 00:21:32,905
Coming, Mr Wuffles!
437
00:21:37,385 --> 00:21:40,025
Using my extensive knowledge
of spiritology
438
00:21:40,025 --> 00:21:42,065
and pan-dimensional calibration...
439
00:21:43,425 --> 00:21:45,865
..I think I can make this wish
work for you.
440
00:21:45,865 --> 00:21:50,345
Right, so I can use it to get home
AND take Effandra with me?
441
00:21:50,345 --> 00:21:54,025
Absolutely. It's just a bit
of careful wording, that's all.
442
00:21:54,025 --> 00:21:57,225
You've got to be utterly precise
with these wishes, Brian.
443
00:21:57,225 --> 00:22:01,105
Which is why I'm writing
the wish in flame tongue -
444
00:22:01,105 --> 00:22:04,185
language of the fire sprite.
445
00:22:04,185 --> 00:22:06,625
My wish?
Course.
446
00:22:06,625 --> 00:22:08,105
Who else's would it be?
447
00:22:10,185 --> 00:22:11,305
Where does it say 'Effandra'?
448
00:22:11,305 --> 00:22:12,985
There.
449
00:22:12,985 --> 00:22:14,505
And where's the part about me
going home?
450
00:22:14,505 --> 00:22:15,585
That bit.
451
00:22:15,585 --> 00:22:16,825
That's the same bit.
452
00:22:16,825 --> 00:22:19,425
It's a very complicated language,
flame tongue.
453
00:22:19,425 --> 00:22:21,345
Hard to fathom.
Hm.
454
00:22:23,625 --> 00:22:27,105
"Clachan eekanth morgans."
455
00:22:27,105 --> 00:22:28,105
You're a natural.
456
00:22:28,105 --> 00:22:31,025
Run along, find Effandra,
tell her the good news.
457
00:22:31,025 --> 00:22:33,265
I'll just finetune the words and...
458
00:22:35,385 --> 00:22:37,945
..meet you at the pub
just before midday?
459
00:22:37,945 --> 00:22:40,145
Howell,
I don't know how to thank you.
460
00:22:40,145 --> 00:22:44,145
Don't thank me, Brian. I got
into this business to help people.
461
00:22:44,145 --> 00:22:45,705
You're a good egg, you are.
462
00:22:54,990 --> 00:22:57,790
A good egg and a bloody genius!
463
00:23:02,590 --> 00:23:03,670
Effandra?
464
00:23:06,030 --> 00:23:07,590
Effandra?
465
00:23:15,230 --> 00:23:16,750
Oh, God!
466
00:23:29,390 --> 00:23:30,870
One moment.
467
00:23:30,870 --> 00:23:32,830
Can I buy some sausages?
468
00:23:32,830 --> 00:23:33,990
Give me one second.
469
00:23:35,830 --> 00:23:37,990
Come on, come on, get up.
470
00:23:37,990 --> 00:23:39,470
Thank you, Herman.
471
00:23:39,470 --> 00:23:40,630
Oh, of course.
472
00:23:41,950 --> 00:23:43,350
Sausages are off.
473
00:23:44,350 --> 00:23:46,150
Hey, here's the wish man, everybody!
474
00:23:50,030 --> 00:23:53,430
Here's your wish, Brian,
exactly as you requested.
475
00:23:53,430 --> 00:23:56,190
You're cutting it fine.
Where's Effandra?
476
00:23:56,190 --> 00:23:57,630
She's gone.
477
00:23:57,630 --> 00:23:59,230
Oh, well. Nevermind, Brian.
478
00:23:59,230 --> 00:24:02,830
Now you can use your wish
for the good of Munty.
479
00:24:02,830 --> 00:24:06,150
She spent one night with me
and now she's left town.
480
00:24:06,150 --> 00:24:09,790
That can happen, in my experience.
481
00:24:10,870 --> 00:24:12,430
Ooh!
482
00:24:12,430 --> 00:24:13,830
Shut it!
483
00:24:13,830 --> 00:24:15,550
It is I, Maladorn!
484
00:24:15,550 --> 00:24:17,670
Where's...?
I haven't finished.
485
00:24:17,670 --> 00:24:20,470
Seer beyond time and space.
486
00:24:21,790 --> 00:24:23,270
That's it.
487
00:24:23,270 --> 00:24:24,990
Mortal, your time is up.
488
00:24:24,990 --> 00:24:27,630
What is your command?
489
00:24:32,430 --> 00:24:34,790
You've got to read these words,
Brian.
490
00:24:34,790 --> 00:24:36,390
Honestly, it's fine. Thank you.
491
00:24:36,390 --> 00:24:40,150
Thank you, Howell,
but I'm going to be going home alone.
492
00:24:40,150 --> 00:24:42,990
Well...I'll rewrite it!
493
00:24:42,990 --> 00:24:47,230
He's not going anywhere,
remember, the sands?
494
00:24:47,230 --> 00:24:51,950
Your wish, feeble mortal,
for my freedom.
495
00:24:54,630 --> 00:24:56,590
Alright, Fire Sprite,
496
00:24:56,590 --> 00:24:58,550
- um, my wish....
- Brian!
497
00:24:58,550 --> 00:25:00,350
Brian, Brian, Brian...
498
00:25:01,350 --> 00:25:04,230
..Mr Wuffles has been poisoned.
499
00:25:04,230 --> 00:25:06,390
Someone threw a quankleroot
into the garden.
500
00:25:06,390 --> 00:25:08,150
Who would do that?
Terrible.
501
00:25:08,150 --> 00:25:10,990
The healer says he's dying.
502
00:25:10,990 --> 00:25:14,110
Don't worry, Effandra,
I can save Mr Wuffles.
503
00:25:15,310 --> 00:25:16,870
Oh, thank you, Stan.
504
00:25:16,870 --> 00:25:18,990
It's Steg.
505
00:25:18,990 --> 00:25:20,430
It doesn't matter.
506
00:25:20,430 --> 00:25:21,670
Step back!
507
00:25:30,790 --> 00:25:32,430
That won't work on a throck.
508
00:25:32,430 --> 00:25:34,990
Sorry?
Don't work on a throck.
509
00:25:34,990 --> 00:25:36,950
Doesn't work?
Not on a throck, no.
510
00:25:36,950 --> 00:25:38,070
Not on a throck?
No.
511
00:25:41,750 --> 00:25:44,190
Brian's got a wish.
A wish?
512
00:25:44,190 --> 00:25:47,230
Brian that's amazing.
You can save Mr Wuffles!
513
00:25:50,030 --> 00:25:51,430
Just take her with you.
It's all here.
514
00:25:51,430 --> 00:25:52,830
Speak!
515
00:25:52,830 --> 00:25:55,790
See, this is my only chance
to get home.
516
00:25:57,590 --> 00:26:00,230
Effandra, will you come with me?
517
00:26:00,230 --> 00:26:02,710
I'd follow you anywhere, Brian.
518
00:26:02,710 --> 00:26:06,150
But I can't leave Mr Wuffles,
not now.
519
00:26:06,150 --> 00:26:07,910
Oh, but I don't think I can...
520
00:26:07,910 --> 00:26:10,070
Speak now!
521
00:26:11,390 --> 00:26:13,590
I'm sorry, Effandra.
522
00:26:16,430 --> 00:26:17,950
I love you, Brian!
523
00:26:24,310 --> 00:26:25,470
Blimey.
524
00:26:33,470 --> 00:26:36,510
I, Brian Weaver, wish...
525
00:26:36,510 --> 00:26:38,110
Yes?
526
00:26:38,110 --> 00:26:41,270
..that the throck known as Mr Wuffles
527
00:26:41,270 --> 00:26:43,630
is restored to full health
and vitality.
528
00:26:46,070 --> 00:26:47,510
It is so!
529
00:26:49,430 --> 00:26:50,990
Freedom!
530
00:26:57,790 --> 00:26:59,030
Huh, weird.
531
00:27:00,990 --> 00:27:02,110
Alright?
532
00:27:08,310 --> 00:27:12,150
You are in deep, deep trouble.
533
00:27:15,350 --> 00:27:16,830
How does he do that?
534
00:27:16,830 --> 00:27:19,350
I don't know!
535
00:27:19,350 --> 00:27:22,070
Oh, Mr Wuffles, you're back!
536
00:27:22,070 --> 00:27:23,350
Mwah!
537
00:27:23,350 --> 00:27:25,430
Brian, you are amazing.
538
00:27:25,430 --> 00:27:29,830
Mr Wuffles,
say hello to your new daddy!
539
00:27:31,270 --> 00:27:32,510
Go on.
540
00:27:32,510 --> 00:27:34,270
Jesus!
541
00:27:34,270 --> 00:27:36,430
Oh...
542
00:27:36,430 --> 00:27:37,590
Say hello.
543
00:27:39,310 --> 00:27:40,590
Hey!
544
00:27:40,590 --> 00:27:42,310
Oh, ow! Argh!
545
00:27:46,430 --> 00:27:47,870
Brian, you're hurting him!
546
00:27:47,870 --> 00:27:49,230
Argh!
547
00:28:07,950 --> 00:28:09,070
Shit!
548
00:28:09,070 --> 00:28:10,790
No, it's OK.
549
00:28:10,790 --> 00:28:13,150
There's time, it's OK.
I just need to...
550
00:28:18,190 --> 00:28:19,790
Oh.
551
00:28:22,510 --> 00:28:23,710
Oh!
552
00:28:23,710 --> 00:28:25,110
Oh, uh...
553
00:28:25,110 --> 00:28:26,710
..it's alright, if we just..
554
00:28:32,110 --> 00:28:33,670
Sorry.
555
00:28:33,670 --> 00:28:35,310
You monster!
556
00:28:36,430 --> 00:28:38,230
You'll not see me again.
557
00:28:38,230 --> 00:28:39,630
Effandra!
558
00:28:39,630 --> 00:28:41,830
Here, let me walk you home.
559
00:28:41,830 --> 00:28:43,070
Thank you, Stag.
560
00:28:44,270 --> 00:28:45,790
It's Steg. Doesn't matter.
561
00:28:48,750 --> 00:28:51,470
Why is there quankleroot
in your pocket?
562
00:28:51,470 --> 00:28:52,950
I...
563
00:28:52,950 --> 00:28:54,430
That, uh...
564
00:28:55,390 --> 00:28:56,710
Uh...
565
00:28:59,630 --> 00:29:01,110
My jacket!
566
00:29:04,910 --> 00:29:06,950
Worst day ever.
567
00:29:07,990 --> 00:29:09,070
Brian.
568
00:29:09,070 --> 00:29:10,790
What?
569
00:29:10,790 --> 00:29:15,070
The sands were right -
you are my tall dark stranger.
570
00:29:15,070 --> 00:29:18,190
And you're staying here, Brian,
because, you,
571
00:29:18,190 --> 00:29:20,150
you're are destined for greatness.
572
00:29:20,150 --> 00:29:24,190
And soon you will be standing
in front of a mighty army.
573
00:29:24,190 --> 00:29:28,270
Barbara, there is no way...
574
00:29:29,590 --> 00:29:31,190
That's him!
575
00:29:31,190 --> 00:29:32,750
That's the guy that kicked me.
576
00:29:32,750 --> 00:29:34,910
This is war!
577
00:29:34,910 --> 00:29:37,310
CHARGE!
578
00:29:41,030 --> 00:29:45,510
Release the slime, quick!
579
00:29:45,510 --> 00:29:46,630
What?!
580
00:29:46,680 --> 00:29:51,230
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