Original subtitles

- Previously on "The Real

- Previously on "The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills:"

- Hi. - Oh, my God.

What was I thinking?

- To a successful tour.

One, two, three. all: Pretty Mess!

- I wanted to ask you to be one of my bridesmaids.

- Oh! - [laughs]

- I would love to be. - Thank you.

- I would love to be your bridesmaid.

- I'm a victim too.

- I would think you'd be more empathetic to this woman.

- I am very empathetic, but I know what it feels like

to be wrongfully accused for lies.

- I thought that was it. That I was going bye-bye.

He had a hammer in one hand, a knife in another.

- I mean, you're a true survivor.

- What happened to Vanderpump? She's not here.

- She said that she wasn't invited.

- [laughs]

- Lisa appears to be nice.

- But if she did this, she played ----ing dirty.

[upbeat music]

- In the game of life, it's Rinna take all.

♪ ♪

- Most people talk about their fantasies.

I'm living mine.

- In business and in life,

I wear many hats and hairstyles.

- You can stab me in the back,

but whilst you're there, kiss my ass.

- I'm not afraid of hard work,

but I'll never do your dirty work.

- My problem with the tabloids?

My real life is so much juicier.

- In Beverly Hills,

the truth always has a way of rising to the top.

[energetic music]

♪ ♪

- Hand. Hand, please, Twirly Whirly.

- Do you like makeup as much as Portia does, Slate?

- Yeah. - She doesn't know.

This will be a first time for her.

- Portia, we'll do your makeup for you

when your mom's not looking.

- Hi. How are you?

- So excited you're here today for the holiday photo shoot.

- Good to see you. - Good to see you, too.

Samantha, this is Teddi. Sam, Teddi.

- Hi, Teddi. So nice to meet you.

- Hi, nice to meet you.

- Samantha, who owns Petite 'n Pretty,

reached out to me after seeing Portia

doing Teddi's makeup on my Instagram

and said, "We'd love to have her to be part of our campaign

as a model for a kid's makeup line.

- Are you guys so excited

to get your makeup hair and done?

- I'm so excited. - It's gonna be so fun.

We have a whole, like, winter 9021 snow wonderland set up.

- It's Christmas already. - Aww. So cute.

- Look at this makeup. - So cute.

- Wow, this is such a cute makeup bag.

- Portia is very good at makeup.

- Little rosy cheeks.

- And she would love to be a YouTube star

or a makeup artist, and I'm gonna embrace

every talent that she has and support her.

We're gonna be stage moms

right now and take pictures... - I know, I can't.

- of our kids getting their makeup done.

Oh sweet. Look at you. She's like, "Makeup?"

- For the shoot only.

I don't want you, like, thinking you're wearing makeup

to school every day. - Why not?

You're such a mean mom. - Lip gloss!

[both laugh]

- The world of makeup has changed

since I was a kid.

I wasn't interested in wearing makeup

until the eighth grade.

I remember, like, putting on black nail polish

and, like, really dark eyeliner and my mom being, like,

"You're not going to the mall like that."

And I was like, "Why? Why you trying to stifle who I am?"

And she's, like, "Really?"

And then I died my hair eggplant.

- Ooh. - Can I see a big smile?

Aww. - She looks so cute.

[phone chimes] Oh my God.

Camille got a picture of the dress.

- Oh, the bridesmaid dress? - It's a cap sleeve.

That's a pretty dress, but a cap sleeve

is not my friend. I cannot wear a cap sleeve.

I'm so sorry that I can't be a bridesmaid.

These are not stick arms.

It's gonna be like a chubby, squished pork-chop-arm.

I cannot do a cap sleeve.

It's getting me all hot and bothered.

- Mommy. - Wow.

- I'm gonna put bows in it. - Aww.

- What's going on with the RV trip?

- I mean, if we're gonna go we have to go soon.

And, like, I really don't have anything organized.

- It doesn't take much.

I mean, it's hopping in the RV and going. Whatever.

- My husband has an RV

and I think we should do some sort of road trip.

- I want to go camping. - I think that would be fun.

- I've been saying that for so long.

I want to do that. - And I think it would be

good for everyone.

- It's not like I'm a camping connoisseur.

My husband got the RV because he likes to have tailgates

for the football games,

and so we've gone camping a couple times.

- I can help cook whatever, but I do want to pitch a tent,

and don't say the word with our children here.

- You guys ready? - Yes.

- Those are such cute little jackets.

- Soon she's gonna want her own glam team.

- Yes.

[camera shutter clicking]

- So cute.

Smile really big.

[laughs] - Slate.

Ugh, the life of a model.

It's really hard isn't it, angel?

[both laugh]

♪ ♪

- The carpet guys are here, but they don't have the poles

for the carpet on the stairs. Where are they?

- You mean those brass poles

that go through? - Yeah.

- They probably put them in the basement.

- Okay, fine. - Okay, 'cause I'm gonna be

home in about ten minutes. - Okay. Bye.

Harry just got back from camping

and it's easier when he's here

because he can pretty much take care of anything.

So he's almost like a human Xanax.

Erika. Boom.

There we go.

Hello. - Hey.

- Hi, gorgeous.

- You're on stage with us right now.

[all cheering]

- Hi, boys. I love those glasses.

- Gucci. - God, I love 'em.

Is your first show tonight?

- Yeah, and we sold out. So, I'm super excited.

- Erika, that's awesome.

- The first show is only a few hours away,

and it's almost like going out on a date

with a really hot guy. It's, like, super exciting.

We're here in soundcheck. What's happening?

What's going on? - Oh my gosh. Well, you know.

We had a dinner for Lois and Camille came in,

and I guess Vanderpump didn't show up

to the shower the other day.

Long story short,

she told Camille that she wasn't invited.

- Delivered. Delivered. This is such bullsh--.

I cannot deal with a liar.

- We were all invited to the shower.

- Yeah, I got an email from Kyle.

- We've all been friends a really long time,

and I think Lisa Vanderpump should reach out

and, like, speak. Talk to us.

Communicate. Don't just turn your back on us.

- So the saga continues.

- So the saga continues,

but Lois was flipping hilarious.

We asked her what she thought about the whole saga, and--

- What did she say? - She goes, "I think it's--"

- Bullsh--. - Whoo!

[both laughing]

- Sorry I wasn't there. I'm here doing the show.

And I'll be home tomorrow, so we'll hang out this week.

- Oh good. So, kick ass. - Thanks, babe.

- You go make that money, honey. Have fun.

- Bye.

[seagulls cawing]

- How heavy are you making it? - Not that heavy.

30 reps. Let's go.

- Oh my God, this is heavy today.

- Plus that core. Let's do this.

- Okay, Jesus. - Come on, babe, let's go.

That's five. Come on. - No, that was 20 ish.

You know what's nice having you?

- What? - I don't have to hire

a trainer. - I know, you built in one.

- I know. That's nice. - And a babysitter too now.

- [laughs]

All right, Thor. This is why your arms are so cut.

I love working out with Aaron.

I, like, forget how hot he is.

A typical day, we wake up at 5:00 in the morning.

We have sex pretty much every single morning,

and then we go to the gym and work out.

You're doing good. So yes, is that our second work out?

Probably.

- How was that dinner? - It was crazy.

I felt bad. LVP didn't show up again.

- Really? - Mm-hmm.

- Well I invited her to come tonight.

She said she was working at Pump and couldn't make it,

and she sent her best wishes, so.

- That was nice. - I invited her.

- So I'm having lunch with Lisa Vanderpump.

- Yeah?

- I think there's been a lot of miscommunication

and a lot of hurt on both sides,

and part of me thinks I should stay the (BLEEP) out of it.

I feel so bad that the ladies are on the outs

with Lisa Vanderpump, and I want her to know

these women still really care about her.

I feel bad that there's so much discord with, you know,

everything, and I don't-- - Oh, oh it's devastated me.

- Can I take you to lunch next week?

- I would love that.

- I think being a mediator

comes from experience because I've had a lot

of ----ing mediation with my ex-husband.

[clicks tongue]

[phone chimes]

Oh, wait. Sami just sent me a text from school.

That boy asked Sami to the dance.

- Oh, right. So tell her she can't go.

- [laughs]

- If a guy asks me to go to the homecoming dance,

am I allowed to say yes?

- If you think it's the right person to go with.

- Whatever. - No.

- It's so funny, this age.

It's surreal when you start to see your kids become adults.

- Yeah. - You know? This makes me cry.

- I'm sorry, baby. - It's all right.

- They'll always be your daughters.

- It's not that.

- What? What is it?

- I just feel, like, I ----ed up a lot.

With their dad.

- You didn't. You didn't.

- I don't want them to look back on their childhood

and just remember-- - Fights?

- Yeah. - But they're not.

You've protected them from a lot of stuff.

- And, you know, in the blink of an eye,

she's gonna be 18 in four years.

And I think (BLEEP). It goes so ----ing fast.

The girls have been through a lot,

and how I chose to relate to the dysfunction

that was going on with their father

was to hide it from the kids.

And I don't know if I did a disservice or not.

I'm happy for her, but it just made me realize

how fast it goes, and life is so short,

and your childhood is so short, you know?

- You did the best you could.

You got to know it. - Oh, I know.

- And you're right, life is short,

so focus on right now and enjoy every moment.

From my own perspective in my life,

I wouldn't change anything.

'Cause it led me to right now, this moment with you, so--

- But you're not a parent.

- Maybe I've got kids floating around out there.

Who knows?

I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding.

- [laughing] Christ. - Yeah.

- Coming up...

- You don't treat people you love like that.

You don't scream at people

and let them go to bed in tears if you love them.

[upbeat music]

- Ready guys? - Ready.

- Let's do this.

- ♪ Rock and roll ♪

This is, like, one of my favorite instruments.

- Yeah, I know. - That's a pineapple.

- No, you just sing. You don't have an instrument.

- ♪ Rock and roll ♪ - What?

- ♪ Rock and roll ♪

- We're here. Let's go, babies.

Okay, careful Phoenix. Slow. Slow.

Let's ring the doorbell guys. Good job.

- Hey. Jagger pushed it. - Well that's okay.

- Hi. - Hi, Kyle.

Come on in. Look at the little cutie.

- Mommy, come. Mommy, come. - You guys knock on the door.

- Hello. - Those are my girls.

- Those are your girls? - Want to play in our room?

- Phoenix is very mature for her age.

She's a little precocious, little munchkin.

And she sees big kids and she's just like,

"Well, obviously they would be my friends."

- Enjoy guys, have fun.

- Think that they're going to be happy being busy.

- I always end up sitting out here.

- Kyle, this is a dream backyard.

- I know, right?

I wish I had this yard when all my kids were littler,

you know what I mean?

[dogs barking]

- Is that your dog? - Get in the house.

Ugh. These ----ing spiders.

Get over here right now.

I'll give you a cracker. Get over here.

They're really a lot, these dogs, I know.

- They are like having children.

- Are we going to go see Boy George for sure?

I'm so excited.

- Boy George and Culture Club are playing

at the Greek tomorrow.

- Are we gonna get to see 'em at the Greek?

- Yeah. - Oh, how cool is that?

- I know! I cannot wait.

- Did you invite Lisa? - No.

I mean I don't want to exclude her,

but in any other friendship of mine if I had a friend

that wanted distance from me, I wouldn't crowd them.

- I'm in the same boat as you, so I totally get it.

It's on her.

♪ ♪

- Binky.

I mean, look at this mess. I've got so much to do still.

- Well, it looks very empty actually.

- I mean, I know it looks like a building site,

but I feel it's gonna be just brighter with the silver there,

and then that white, that silver.

- Yeah, and we will change the lights, right?

- Oh yeah, I want to erase every memory

of the last three months in here.

- I know.

- Getting rid of this old kitchen is cathartic

because all the negativity

seems to have gone out the window.

And if that's gonna cost $300,000,

then it will be worth every damn penny.

So I'm going to fill the blank here,

I'm gonna see Denise. Love you. - Okay, darling.

- Okay, love you too. both: Bye.

- I've distanced myself from the rest of the women

because I haven't had any space in my life for tears,

for sadness, for being under attack.

But Denise hasn't been part of all of that,

so I'm looking forward to seeing her.

I should have listened to her when she said no gifts.

- I don't want to intrude.

I came to drop off a gift for your birthday.

- Oh, you're so sweet. I still got your wedding gift.

- Oh, stop. I don't need a wedding gift.

[upbeat electronic music]

♪ ♪

[clattering]

- Oh, sh--.

♪ ♪

Hi, Rocio. - Yeah.

- I think we need to rewrap them.

- Oh, thank you.

- I hate the fact that they're pink.

Can we just put them here?

- Hi, I'm here to see Lisa.

- Hello. - Hi.

- Hi, gorgeous.

- How are you? - Good.

We're sitting over here.

These are your wedding presents...

- You're so sweet. - And I'm so embarrassed...

- Why? - That they're, like,

pink and gold. - I love pink and gold.

- Well, anyway, open them then, just--

- Thank you so much. That is so nice.

- I like Denise and I've seen a compassionate quality

in the way she interacts with her children.

- Is that good? - Is it good?

- I know, it looks very good.

- I feel there's an authenticity

to Denise Richards, and I've kind of warmed to that.

- I love this. - It's porcelain.

- I love this. Thank you. - Isn't that gorgeous?

And this is just a smaller one.

- Okay, thank you.

- Yeah, so we'll just put it down there.

Who can refuse pink porcelain?

- How we doing today, ladies? - I'm good. What do you fancy?

- Do you have Casamigos? - Reposado, yeah.

- Yeah, just a single, neat. - I'll have a glass of rosé.

- Perfect, I'll be back with you ladies.

- Yeah, so, there's been a lot going on.

- You seem better. - Yeah.

- We haven't seen much of you though.

- No, well that's been my choice, you know.

- They really do care about you and the friendship

could still be there. Especially with you and Kyle.

- When you say to one of your best friends,

"Look, I'm swearing to you on my children's life,

that did not happen."

Kyle, I swear on my children's life.

You think I did that--

- I'm saying-- - I'm done with you too.

- Maybe you care more about your image

than your friendships. - Bye, Kyle.

Show yourself out, darling.

So ugly, the whole situation, and it really hurt my feelings,

and I don't need that in my life right now.

- Wasn't Denise gonna meet with Lisa and talk to her today?

- I think she's gonna go in with more kid gloves.

She has some experience with similar personalities.

i.e. her ex-husband. I'm not saying that they're--

- So you're comparing Lisa Vanderpump to Charlie Sheen?

- Well. - They are both Virgos.

And Virgos tend to be me-me-me-me-me.

So, there may be some similarities.

- Hold on, let me take a swig of that.

- I went through a very difficult, ugly divorce.

I've had a lot of sh--

in the press that has been embarrassing and humiliating.

And I--and had to do live talk shows after all that,

and the easy thing would have been for me to say,

"You know what, I'm canceling all my interviews."

- We all handle things differently.

- And I understand that.

I respect that, I really do.

And it wasn't true-- - But if you had chosen

to retreat, then--

- Yeah, I could have very easily said,

"You know what, I need to take that time."

- I understand what you're saying...

- You know what I mean? - But I can't explain

why I feel that I'm in a space

where I wanted to retreat. I can't explain that.

- If she can't even explain it then I think she would want to

repair that and not just throw it away

and at least defend herself

if these are things that she really didn't do.

- She's too scared to face everybody.

- Is that what you think?

- No one ever says to her, "You're wrong. You didn't..."

No one says that in her life.

The people that she surrounds herself with all the time.

- Right. - That's what friends do.

You call each other out. You grow and learn from that.

- At the end of the day when there's real deep friendships

you may say things that are hurtful

but still respect each other.

- Yeah, but I'm a liar.

- You know what, you're not perfect.

Yes, I think you did that.

Yes, but I still love you and I care about you.

- You don't treat people you love like that.

You don't scream at people

and let them go to bed in tears if you love them.

- She's gonna make herself the victim.

She's gonna turn it all around. Everyone else is wrong.

She freaks out, she bolts, and can't face people.

For some reason when you confront Lisa

about things she just bolts.

- You know what, I'm not dealing with this.

- Well, why are you walking away?

- We're having a conversation.

- This is a ----ing sabotage attack.

- Listen-- - Thank you very much.

- I'm going. Bye, guys. - Please do not leave, Lisa.

- That's what she does, and I don't want her to leave.

I want her to come back. I want to figure it out.

- They should believe me and if they don't

then I don't really want them to be part of my life.

It's as simple as that.

- There has to be some conversation, some dialogue.

- There has to be.

- Because, even if she tells me,

"Eff off, I never want to be friends with you,"

and I haven't done anything wrong to her.

- She just makes it so hard.

- Since the Radar Online article's come out,

I have not heard or seen Lisa at all.

- I don't want to be have this be taking energy from my life.

- Kyle and Lisa have had an argument,

but what did I do to Lisa to be cut out?

- Those women still love you. - It's a shame.

- It is a shame. - It's a shame, but cheers--

- Because you're a lot of fun and you're missed.

- Not really but thank you. - Yes, you are.

I don't get it. How do you not talk it out?

Don't throw away a 10- or 20-year friendship.

We're going on an RV trip.

It would be a lot of fun to have you there.

- Thank you but no.

Even if she said,

"We're going shopping with George Clooney in Paris,"

and these women I wouldn't go. But on an RV trip?

Uh, I'll pass.

I don't want you to feel you have to defend me.

- I'm not defending you. - Why not?

What kind of ----ing friend are you?

- I have to go pee.

- Okay, well why don't we go inside.

- There's lots of trees. - He's never done that.

I don't want to encourage that, Kyle.

- I don't know. I don't have sons.

I hear they go on trees. - I know. I know.

Jaggy, come with me, please.

Oh lordy. - Boys like to do that.

- Jaggy. [sighs]

- Clearly little boys like to mark their territory.

Around me.

- As they come out of the water,

and he's getting naked. Uh-oh.

- Oh my God, he's peeing in the pool.

- No, Cruz. No. - He's going.

- This is one thing you don't need to learn

from your brother.

- Coming up...

- I'm disappointed she didn't show up at the shower.

- Why didn't you tell her, "Yes, you were invited"?

- Oh, I said I didn't know that.

- But you did. - No, you're right about that.

Call me out on that sh--.

[upbeat music]

- You just tell me what time you're coming back?

- Whatever time the concert ends.

- I like my mashed potatoes.

- You like your mashed potatoes?

- Uh-uh. - You want to get the door?

- Say, "Who is it?" - Who is it?

- Hi. - Hey.

- Hi. How are you? Yes ma'am. - Hi.

Look at this house, it's gorgeous.

- Thank you. - Hi, Cruz.

- Oh. He's grumpy. - What's going on?

- Somebody feed me. - "Somebody feed me."

Okay, I like that.

- This is Celeste. - Hey, how are you?

- Do you guys want a glass of champagne?

- Are you having one?

- Yeah. - Sure!

- I just poured one. - Okay, well if you are.

- Why not, me too. - My first show was fabulous.

- One, two, three... all: Pretty Mess!

- Based on the demand, we've added more shows

and I have a few hours back in Los Angeles

and I cannot think of a better way to spend them

than at the Greek with Boy George.

- Wow, look at this.

- Hey, this is really pretty. - This is so cool.

- Thank you. - Look at the view.

- Are you guys gonna ride the mechanical bull?

- What--what are you talking about?

- That is funny. - You see the bull?

- Yes.

- You know the last time I rode a mechanical bull

was at my great-grandmother's funeral with my cousins

and it--oh, it's fabulous.

- Great-grandmother had a bull at her funeral?

- No, we went to the country bar with my cousins after it.

- Cheers.

- I come from some good time people.

And we celebrated my great-grandmother

and it was fabulous.

It was ----ing--

it was one of the best nights of my life actually.

- Hello. - Hi, guys.

- Hi. - Hi.

- Oh my God, this view looks so pretty at night.

- It's fabulous. - Hey, Camille.

- Hey, good to see you. - Nice to see you.

- Awesome jacket.

- Do you guys want a glass of champagne?

- Sure, why not?

- I miss these little nugget ages.

- Me too. - You know.

You and I are at the same stage on that.

- Yes. - I love Lisa Rinna,

but she was extremely unfair at dinner.

- Do you not believe her for getting up

in front of the ----ing world and telling this story?

- We don't know if for sure it happened or not.

- Camille, she's a doctor.

- But life is way too short to hold grudges.

- [whining] Mama. - I'm gonna go but I promise

I'll be here when you wake up.

- Cruz is able to tell any time

I'm starting to get ready to leave.

- Mom. No. - No.

- Sometimes he's totally fine and sometimes he's, like,

[imitates nonsensical whining]

and I never know what I'm gonna get.

Sit down and eat, please.

- Amelia used to have a fit when we would leave.

Like, fits. Like, meltdowns.

Our girls would say, [yelling] "Don't go!

Please don't go!"

It was way worse than what Cruz is doing.

I do miss that a little bit.

When I leave no one's saying, "Please don't go!"

Nope. Those days are over.

- Leaving is always a little rough.

- Should we step outside?

- We should. - Yeah, let's not make this

more dramatic than it has to be.

- Hey, Ed. Can you help with the transition a little bit?

Bye Edwin, see you later. - Bye.

- Bye. Have fun tonight. - Mommy,

can I call you whenever? - Thank you.

- Good bye. - Love you.

Bye. Guys. - [whines]

- Hey, why you guys crying? You guys never cry.

- Will you pick him up, baby? - [crying]

[energetic music]

♪ ♪

- Thank you.

- Baby. - Baby!

- I've been looking for you.

- I'm here. - Honey, I've phoned Kenny.

- And? Tell me everything. - I want to tell you tomorrow.

I'm not going to go through it tonight.

- Oh my God. - I'm very focused on my work.

- Honey, you can't do this to me.

- Suffice to say--

- You can't tell me, "I've spoken to someone

who I haven't spoken to in two weeks,"

and then say, "I'll talk to you tomorrow."

- I said to him... I know we've gone slightly adrift

and let's have lunch

and see if two old gits like us can't sort this out.

- Lisa has had it with these women.

- Don't confuse Teddi Mellencamp

or Kyle with Dorit and myself.

Dorit hasn't done anything wrong, Kenny,

so there's no reason for us not to have lunch.

So he's going to talk to Lisa,

so we'll hear. It's up here, babe.

- That's what you needed to wait

till tomorrow to tell me?

- Well it's a bit more detailed than that, but--

- Okay, give me the details tomorrow.

- That's the summary. - Okay.

- Come on.

- How's your tour by the way, Erika?

- Oh! - What's happening?

- So we sold out in Jersey City which was great.

- Awe-some.

- We leave tomorrow morning, go to Dallas,

and show on Friday night.

Travel to San Francisco on Saturday,

show Sunday night in San Francisco,

come home Monday, host AMAs. - Awesome.

- Amazing. - Now's the time.

- Right. - Take advantage of everything.

- Say yes, say yes and keep going, and die later.

- Cheers to that.

- I'm saying this just 'cause I want to say it and then

I don't think we should talk about it the rest of the night.

I did send a text to Lisa Vanderpump.

- Werh-werh. - I just said,

"Hi, Lisa. I hope you're well.

"I know you and I have an issue

"that we aren't going to see eye-to-eye on.

"So at this point, I truly think

"it would be best to move on.

"I hold no ill will and don't want you feeling like

we can't coexist in this group. Best, Teddi."

- Oh I'm sure Lisa's not gonna be upset for long.

I'm sure she's just gonna drop it and move on.

Sorry Teddi but you're in this for a while.

- I'm disappointed she didn't show up

at the shower. - Why didn't you tell her,

"By the way, yes you were invited."

- "I wasn't invited. It's okay though.

Hope you had fun, darling."

I said, "I didn't know you weren't invited.

"Nobody told me that.

Of course I would have wanted you there."

Oh, I said I didn't know that. I'm sorry.

- But you did.

- What happened to Vanderpump? She's not here.

- You invited her? - Of course I invited her.

Yeah. - She should have showed up.

- No, you're right about that.

You are right about that. Call me out on that sh--.

- Camille struggles with being straight up

and honest sometimes.

She will play to both sides of the fence.

"Oh, I didn't realize you weren't invited."

You know she was invited!

- I have no beef with her.

There's nothing going on between her and I.

- Coming up...

- Billy Idol's here. - No.

- And he's-- - Shall I go get him?

- Yes, please.

- Yeah, I want to meet Billy Idol.

[upbeat music]

[indistinct chatter]

- Let's go, ladies. - I've never been here.

This is so exciting. - Me too. I'm all excited.

- Oh, is this where we're hanging out?

- Whoo! - Whoa, more snacks.

- Yay.

- Does anyone else want a margarita?

- Are you a good bartender? - I'm gonna give a heavy pour.

This isn't my first rodeo, being backstage,

but I love the vibe.

I love seeing how different performers

are behind the scenes. It's a cool experience.

- You're not working at Tom Tom, Teddi.

- Not anytime soon. - [laughs]

I just spit up a carrot. - So when you're on tour,

do you have a backstage like this? I love that.

- Dance it. Dance it.

Dance it. Get rid of this robe.

- Do you get into character?

- Of course, because you're in costume and hair and makeup.

- Right. Mm-hmm. - Everything is amplified.

Everything is bigger.

When you put on your costume,

you're ready to go perform.

All right let's go. [crowd cheering]

- Do you ever actually make eye contact with anybody?

- 100%. You see people that are,

like--number one, people that are singing the songs.

- In my fantasies if I was on stage

I'd be, like, talking to everybody.

- Would you, Kyle?

- [echoing] Is everybody excited

to be here tonight? [crowd cheering]

Like that.

Well I have a whole bunch of fantasies--

- Hi! - Yay!

- How are you? - What am I walking into?

- I'm excited to see your show. - How are you?

- There are so many things going on tonight.

I'm actually going onstage with Gladys Knight.

I've got this voice. I was so in tune with her.

[laughs] - Really? Really?

- Oh, honey.

- So we've got Gladys.

Billy Idol's here. - No.

- He's not doing anything, but he's here.

- I love Billy Idol.

- You're giving all the secrets.

- I'm sorry I'm the only one in this room with a big mouth.

- Shall I go get him? - Yes.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah, I want to meet Billy Idol.

- Okay, I'll go get him. - Billy Idol?

Gorgeous, platinum blonde, sexy,

Oh, heartbreaker. I love him.

- Now who's missing? - Denise.

- Denise, who I haven't met. Where is she?

- Um, family night at home.

- Who else is missing? - Lisa Vanderpump.

- I can't believe she's not at my gig. How rude.

How rude. Even though I didn't invite her.

- Really?

- Because you're having a row with her.

- Forget about Culture Club and George.

This is PK's night and isn't Lisa, like,

PK's best friend?

So the fact that Lisa's not here--like, why?

What is she doing?

[relaxing music]

- [softly] Feel so sexy. [brushing hair]

You like it, don't you?

You do. You like it.

Yes. I worship you.

♪ ♪

What would I do without all of my little furry children?

Yes.

- PK spoke to Ken today. - Oh he did?

- Wow. - Oh, good.

- He did? - PK was like, "Ken,

"I'm not interested in getting into the round and round.

"We should have this conversation in person.

It's about the ladies."

- Listen, if PK can talk to Lisa and Ken

and have some sort of a breakthrough

then it's gonna be better for the whole group.

It certainly didn't work with me.

- Look who I found.

- Oh my God. This is Lisa.

- Nice to meet you. - This is Kyle.

- Kyle, nice to meet you. - Hi. Hello.

- Hi, I'm Teddi. Nice to meet you.

- I'm Erika, it's nice to meet you.

- I used to work at Mr. Chow and Euro Chow.

- John Mellencamp.

- Wait. She used to work at Mr. Chow?

- Her dad's John Mellencamp.

- And your dad's John Mellencamp.

- My dad's Mr. Chow.

- I know.

- Wait, when did you work there?

- Like 1999.

- That means you've been well trained.

- I know all the things.

When I first moved to L.A.

my parents said, "We will help you move out there,

but then that's it."

So I got a hostessing job at Euro Chow and Mr. Chow.

I mean I really killed it at both of them.

- Have you seen Culture Club before?

- Uh, I'm not sure.

- Have you heard of them? - Yes.

- Oh my God.

Billy Idol and Boy George in the same room.

- I know, this has become really cool.

- Can we get a picture? - I'll take it, babe.

- It's so cool when you get to be backstage

hanging out with your idols, so to speak, in person.

- How many pounds can you get in one photo?

- Do you have a lot of homework tonight, Lola?

- Yeah, I have, like, four hours.

- Okay, Lola. How many times does three go into eight?

- Twice. - Okay, that's six.

And then, do you want to do it?

- Yeah.

- After this, you'll probably never use it again,

but at least you're learning it.

I love Boy George and Dorit knows how badly

I want to meet him, but family comes first.

Go start on your homework and then I'll come up

and help you in a little bit.

Come on, go potty.

- God, I love it here. This is peaceful.

- I love this.

I know. Mom and Dad are gonna sit for a minute.

- Sit? I might pass out. - I know.

- Well you got really bad breath.

She's just, like, whoa.

- Do you like the beach?

- How are things with Charles?

- He did file with the court

to lower the child support, which--

- Oh, God.

- Charlie lost everything and so now

he wants to lower child support.

The press was right, he did file.

It's so crazy-- - The tabloids get it first

before anybody else-- - Before I even knew about it.

- It's so crazy. - So I texted him,

"Why do you want to file this?

Like, we can work stuff out discreetly and privately."

- You've been dealing with this for what, 12, 13 years now?

- 13 years.

I never anticipated the journey I would be on

after our divorce, let me just say that.

Charlie and I didn't have a prenup when we got married

and when we got divorced, I could have asked

for half of what he made, and I did not.

Because I ain't a greedy ----ing whore.

I just don't want to deal with this.

He has new lawyer.

- How many is this? - 14.

- 14? - Poor bastard.

How do you blow all that ----ing money?

He should have given me half of that goddamn money

'cause I would have put it away for him.

- This is probably why he doesn't want

to pay anymore-- - Oh whatever--

- He's paid it all out to the lawyers.

- Coming up... - It was a joke.

- You made a joke and you hurt someone's feelings.

- No. - Then you say,

"I'm very sorry." - And I did.

- Stupid joke. - And I did.

- And by the way, good luck having sex

with your wife today. - [laughs]

- We're going this way.

- Look at this. - I know.

- This way, girls. - Where do you want us to sit?

- Anywhere. - So great. Look at it.

- I'm literally in heaven right now.

- It's '80s night at the Greek.

- Can you send those to me? - Yes.

- Dorit, you know I have to leave early.

Right? - They will understand.

- Because I got to get on the plane.

I gotta go to my show in Dallas tomorrow.

- Should be grooving here. - No, I want to be here.

- Oh, it's happening.

[cheers and applause]

- How you doing? [all cheering]

We are Culture Club.

- Whoo!

- We are here to have a good time.

- Do it a half. Half.

- This is amazing, you guys.

- Nobody pours a tequila like this, asshole.

- ♪ Downtown we'll drown, we're in our never splendor ♪

all: ♪ Flowers, showers ♪

- ♪ Who's got the new boy gender? ♪

all: ♪ I'll be your baby, I'll be your score ♪

- [yelling indistinctly]

all: ♪ I'll run the gun for you and so much more ♪

♪ I'll tumble for ya, I'll tumble for ya ♪

- Look at Kyle! - ♪ I'll tumble for ya ♪

- She's so funny. - ♪ I'll tumble for ya ♪

- I love Margarita Kyle.

Put a couple margaritas in this girl

and you get the twerking and the splits

and the true Kyle Richards.

[band plays musical finish]

[cheers and applause]

- Ladies and gentlemen, it is an honor

to be in the presence of soul greatness, Gladys Knight.

[cheers and applause]

- Look at my goosebumps. - Me too.

- Yay! - Wow.

- She's so amazing.

- God, she looks exactly the same.

- I know. - I love you.

- I love you too. - Isn't he amazing?

- [screaming]

[indistinct yelling]

- ♪ Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

- ♪ These boys are hungry and a little vain ♪

- That's all right, baby.

- ♪ The truth is a runaway train ♪

- What does that mean, "the truth is a runaway train?"

- I will explain it all to you.

- ♪ The truth is that runaway train ♪

both: ♪ It's runaway train, it's a runaway train ♪

- Everybody is getting along so well, right?

- When's the shoe gonna drop, Camille?

- I know! - Yes!

- Yeah. - That was so lovely.

I like this song.

[cheers and applause]

- Ladies and gentlemen, Gladys Knight.

- That was fun.

- I gotta go, babe. - Okay, my darling.

- Obviously, I've been to so many of George's shows,

and it's always so exciting.

- See y'all later. - Bye!

- Are you here with someone you love?

- I love you!

- But now being with the girls,

who are having such a good time, loving the music,

just kind of takes it to a whole other level.

- Did you love it? - Amazing.

- So good.

- You've got to see this moment.

This moment is beyond.

- Gonna invite some friends onstage.

If you have lights on your phone, perhaps join in.

- Oh, look at that.

- ♪ There's a train at the station ♪

[chorus vocalizing] ♪ That's ready to leave ♪

♪ And a perfect future just waiting for me ♪

- I feel really lucky right now.

Being here tonight, it's amazing.

- ♪ You give me hope ♪ all: ♪ Hope ♪

♪ And you give me life ♪

- There's been so much negativity lately

that it's nice that we can laugh and have fun.

I feel like we're all 16 years old.

- ♪ You give me life ♪ - ♪ You give me life ♪

♪ Life, yeah ♪

- Whoo! - Thank you, LA.

[cheers and applause]

- Unbelievable. Oh my God. Unbelievable.

[lively music]

- Girls, let's go see George in his dressing room.

- I've lost my voice 'cause I screamed so much.

- I know. - Hi. [chuckles]

- Yay! Whoo! - Oh! Oh!

- What a night. What a night.

- It was amazing. - Where were you?

- We were right next to the sound.

- Oh, they had good seats, George.

- Yeah. No, it was perfect.

- The best thing about the whole night,

there was this one woman, and she was literally

on her phone the whole night Facebooking.

Hello. I'm big on audience participation,

so [inaudible]. - [laughs]

- Do you ever feel vulnerable?

Like, I'm scared someone would do something to me.

- No. - No?

- No. You can't think like that.

- I was thinking I'd think,

what if someone tried to hurt me?

- Do you really want to hurt me?

[laughter]

- No, honestly--

- Kyle, nobody thinks like that.

- If you're one person with thousands staring,

like, it could be a little bit vulnerable.

- You could have issues. You can't even get on

with your best friend so you could have issues.

all: Oh!

- PK! - Shade!

all: PK. - That's not cool.

- It's a joke.

- PK, you're in the same ----ing position.

- That's not fair or cool, PK. - Honey, it's a joke.

- A joke is what you go, "ha-ha-ha, that's so funny."

- No, it's an English joke, not an American joke.

- I don't want to burst your bubble, PK,

but Lisa's not talking to you. - Well, we'll see.

Ken is definitely talking to me.

I spoke to him for an hour.

- I've been ----ing defending you with--

okay, okay.

The whole reason I even got into this situation

was speaking up on your wife's behalf.

I did not put us in this position.

- No, she didn't, and when you say that it's an insult.

- Oh my God, I made a joke.

- Now you're giving me a jab and trying to get back

into Lisa and Ken's good graces.

Is that what's happening here?

- PK and George and even Lisa Vanderpump,

it's their way of joking.

Which, I know, it's hurtful. Particularly the situation--

- It hurts me because you're in the same boat as me.

I hate to burst your ----ing bubble, PK.

- Well, I'm not quite in the same boat as you.

- Okay, well-- - PK, listen to me.

- If you and your wife are in a different boat then, amazing.

- Let's go you guys. - I'm gonna defend myself.

- By the way your new song, amazing.

- Thank you so much.

- PK, you're wrong. - Thanks for coming.

- That was a nasty comment.

And you've been defending her the whole time.

- Are you kidding me? He's ----ing being rude.

I'm done.

- Honey, you don't know these women as well as I do.

- Yeah, but I don't need to know them.

I made a joke.

- It was on purpose. - It was a joke.

- If you made a joke and you hurt someone's feelings,

then you say, "I'm very sorry."

- And I did. - Stupid joke.

- And I did. - Forget me,

it's ----ing disrespectful to his own wife

to talk like that. I'm sorry--

- So whatever conversation he had today with Ken

has now got him to a place where that's how he's acting.

- Yeah. And by the way, good luck having sex

with your wife tonight. - [laughs]

- Coming up...

- Me and Vanderpump are good. - That's doesn't matter.

Let me have a conversation with Kyle for two seconds.

- This whole situation

- This whole situation with Lisa--

- I understand where you--

- And PK are kissing each other's ass.

So guess what? Have ----ing fun with that.

Have fun with your wife too. Have fun.

- To say, "You can't even get along with your best friend,"

diminishes what actually happened.

- It was a joke.

That's what it is. - Okay.

- I don't want to have a whole conversation about this.

I made a joke. You know it was a joke.

I know it was a joke.

- PK's got a great sense of humor.

It's one of the things I love about him.

- Jim. How you doing, mate? - Hey.

- But this is one of those instances

where he put his foot in his mouth.

He said something that is going to come back

and kick me in the ass.

- Why do you say that in a moment like that?

What is the ----ing British humor about?

- But he said it was a joke.

- He knows your relationship with Vanderpump.

- And that made it a low blow and I get it.

I get how you-- - He's ----ing rude.

- Yeah. PK just loves to stir the sh--,

and I can say that because I love to stir the sh--.

One sh--stirrer can call out

another sh--stirrer okay, honey?

[imitates smoking]

- It cuts deep. - It cuts deep. I get it.

- It's all based on your --- -ing wife

and you giving up your ----ing dog.

- Dorit's here. Dorit's here. Dorit's here.

- Hey, hon. - I fully understand

how you feel,

but I also understand in what context he meant it.

He's very comfortable with you. He loves you.

It was not an insult and it did not come from a bad place.

Was it in poor taste? Yes. Was it stupid?

Yes. But he didn't mean it that way.

- But the hard part is then he goes,

"But we're good. Me and Ken are good.

Me and Vanderpump are good." - That doesn't matter.

I'm not talking about that right now, Teddi.

And do me a favor,

let me have a conversation with Kyle for two seconds.

[tense music]

- The way that she just talked to me was so inappropriate.

- Okay, don't get upset. Don't get upset.

- Here's what I've learned about Dorit.

Even though we're getting along better,

when things are heated Dorit

and I don't communicate the same.

- I told you exactly what I said.

- First of all, take down your tone.

I'm not in one of your accountability...

- Whoo! Whoo! - Memberships.

...so just take it down 15 notches.

- Why are you yelling at me?

- No, I'm just trying to have a conversation.

- I'm telling you how we all precept-ed what just happened.

- Okay well then, I'm happy for you.

But first, Kyle's my friend. - I'm sure

it was very annoying that I made a good point, I know.

- Teddi-- - Very irritating.

- Can you give me 30 seconds?

- Go ahead. - Thank you.

- Dorit and I don't have the best friendship,

but I'm gonna side with Dorit on this one.

- 30 seconds without jumping in.

- Go ahead. - Teddi and her big mouth.

Know-it-all Teddi.

It's not the right time to insert herself

into that conversation. Period.

- I'm sorry, my whole fight has been about

protecting the two of you. - No.

Your fight has been about your own personal experiences

and things-- - No, you're wrong.

Dorit you're 100% wrong. - Kyle, I understand--

- If it was about Lisa and me and I didn't know

the two of you, I would have defended her

blindly like she wants me too.

But because I care about the two of you I couldn't

----ing do that. I had to ----ing be honest.

- It's strange to watch

Dorit and Kyle both wanting Lisa's friendship

and who's going to be better friends with her.

It's beyond. The whole thing is beyond.

- Why would he say that to me? - It was a joke.

- If that's a joke, his humor sucks.

- Well, I beg to differ.

- I didn't see you laughing about that.

- Honey.

- I think he actually thinks he's being funny,

but he's not. - I agree.

- Just like Vanderpump thinks she's funny.

- I don't want-- - Here's the thing--

- So maybe you shouldn't be friends with British people.

- [laughs] Oh, my God.

- I'm so sick of, "It's British humor, darling."

That was my own British humor, but I'm not British.

I wish I could hide behind British humor.

No, I'm just an asshole with iconic hair and big lips.

- You guys, we got to go. - Do you have an opinion

that you want to share because I did shut down Teddi

because I wanted to have a conversation.

- I just wish that every time that we had an issue

you didn't have to snap at me when I'm just sharing my--

- Teddi, you didn't have to jump in immediately.

- But then say that, in that tone.

You don't have to "ahh!" It's always that.

♪ ♪

- You snapped. You did. - Maybe it's because I'm really

sick and tired of her doing it to me.

- Well.

- Just constantly chiming

in and having a little go at me or having--

- I'm not trying to have a go at you.

- I'm sorry if I was a little aggressive.

- Good. - Because I really--

- Good. - Didn't mean it to be.

- Okay. - That's it.

And I came down to set the record straight with her.

- I know. - That comment just,

it hurt her.

- I know PK's a good guy. I was offended in the moment,

but I'm not going to carry a grudge.

- Why don't we all go home? - Yes.

- Bye. - Bye, love.

- Am I going to hold on to this forever? No.

- Bye, girls. Get home safe.

- But right now I'm pissed off. (BLEEP) you, PK.

Oh, and that's British humor.

- Next on "The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills"...

- Sophia's coming home. We're taking her holiday--

- Oh, really? - Yeah.

- The gate open? - Honey, run!

- God damn it.

- So Dorit came over to explain things

and then Teddi just jumped in.

I just feel like she's a bit of a know-it-all.

- I know you think you're better friends with Lisa

than PK is with Lisa.

- I never even heard of you or PK until two years ago.

- Cool. LVP. We're going to have lunch together.

- It's very difficult for me to believe

that you had nothing to do with that.

- If you believe I gave the story to Radar Online,

we don't have a friendship.

- To learn more about the Housewives,

go to bravotv.com