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1
00:00:51,717 --> 00:00:53,844
Well, I wake up in the mornin'
2
00:00:53,919 --> 00:00:56,683
Each and every day
3
00:00:56,755 --> 00:01:01,522
And I sit down at the table
and I hear my daddy say
4
00:01:01,593 --> 00:01:04,061
Life is nothin'
It's a nothin'
5
00:01:04,129 --> 00:01:06,620
Life is nothin'
but a slap in the face
6
00:01:06,698 --> 00:01:09,064
Life is nothin'
It's a nothin'
7
00:01:09,134 --> 00:01:11,796
Life is nothin'
but a fat rat race
8
00:01:11,870 --> 00:01:16,307
Oh, yeah, yeah, oh, yeah, yeah
9
00:01:16,375 --> 00:01:18,866
Oh, yeah, yeah
10
00:01:18,944 --> 00:01:21,879
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah
11
00:01:21,947 --> 00:01:23,972
Every night I have a dream
12
00:01:24,049 --> 00:01:26,882
That you're takin' off your dress
13
00:01:26,952 --> 00:01:31,616
The only thing you're wearin'
is a button on your chest
14
00:01:31,690 --> 00:01:34,090
And the button
it says nothin'
15
00:01:34,159 --> 00:01:36,753
Life is nothin'
but a slap in the face
16
00:01:36,829 --> 00:01:39,127
Life is nothin'
It's a nothin'
17
00:01:39,198 --> 00:01:41,666
Life is nothin'
but a fat rat race
18
00:01:41,733 --> 00:01:46,466
What is life
19
00:01:46,538 --> 00:01:49,098
What is life
20
00:01:49,174 --> 00:01:51,608
A rat race, a rat race
21
00:01:51,677 --> 00:01:56,444
What is life
22
00:01:56,515 --> 00:01:59,177
What is life
23
00:01:59,251 --> 00:02:01,776
A rat race, a rat race
24
00:02:01,854 --> 00:02:04,516
A rat race, a rat-rat race
25
00:02:04,590 --> 00:02:08,856
Oh, yeah, yeah, oh, yeah, yeah
26
00:02:08,927 --> 00:02:11,953
Oh, yeah, yeah
27
00:02:12,030 --> 00:02:15,158
It's a jungle out there
and I know I don't belong
28
00:02:16,935 --> 00:02:20,302
So all night long
I just sing my stupid song
29
00:02:22,174 --> 00:02:24,369
Get a body out
in the rat, in the race
30
00:02:24,443 --> 00:02:26,911
Get a body out
in the rat, in the race
31
00:02:26,979 --> 00:02:29,539
Get a body out in the rat
32
00:02:33,719 --> 00:02:37,155
To the sound of the storm comin'
strictly from the B-A-H-A M-E-N
33
00:02:49,568 --> 00:02:52,036
Life ain't nothin'
but a big rat race
34
00:02:54,539 --> 00:02:56,734
Life ain't nothin'
but a big rat race
35
00:02:56,808 --> 00:02:59,038
Life is nothin'
It's a nothin'
36
00:02:59,111 --> 00:03:01,671
Life is nothin'
but a slap in the face
37
00:03:01,747 --> 00:03:04,079
Life is nothin'
It's a nothin'
38
00:03:04,149 --> 00:03:06,617
Life is nothin'
but a fat rat race
39
00:03:17,763 --> 00:03:21,800
Hi. I'm checking out. 14322.
40
00:03:23,568 --> 00:03:25,695
- Mr. Schaffer?
- That's me.
41
00:03:26,971 --> 00:03:29,963
- I have your bill right here.
- Great. Thank you.
42
00:03:30,041 --> 00:03:34,569
- How was your luck last night?
- I don't... I didn't gamble.
43
00:03:34,646 --> 00:03:38,582
I was here for a friend's bachelor
party. I guess he's the gambler.
44
00:03:41,119 --> 00:03:44,714
What's this $ 110?
45
00:03:44,789 --> 00:03:49,192
- Those are your in-room movies.
- I didn't watch any movies.
46
00:03:49,260 --> 00:03:53,162
Okay, let's see. Afro Whores.
47
00:03:53,231 --> 00:03:55,392
Afro Whores?
48
00:03:55,466 --> 00:03:58,765
You watched it...
let's see... 11 times.
49
00:04:00,939 --> 00:04:05,706
Afro Whores, 2:30. Afro Whores,
4:00. Afro Whores, 5:30.
50
00:04:05,777 --> 00:04:09,213
It says in the morning you watched
The Grinch for ten minutes...
51
00:04:09,280 --> 00:04:11,271
and then switched back
over to Afro Whores.
52
00:04:11,349 --> 00:04:14,318
I swear I didn't watch it.
I was at a bachelor party.
53
00:04:14,385 --> 00:04:16,615
There were 35 people there.
You can ask any of them.
54
00:04:16,688 --> 00:04:19,521
- Take that off my record.
- This is not a record, sir.
55
00:04:19,591 --> 00:04:24,051
- It's a delete.
- How many times did you watch it?
56
00:04:24,128 --> 00:04:27,063
None! I didn't watch it.
57
00:04:27,131 --> 00:04:31,124
Are you sure? "Sizzling,
three-way, backdoor action...
58
00:04:31,202 --> 00:04:33,568
featuring
two sexy soul sisters..."
59
00:04:33,638 --> 00:04:36,436
I don't need to know what
it's about. I did not watch it.
60
00:04:38,009 --> 00:04:41,240
I didn't.
61
00:04:41,312 --> 00:04:45,874
Drove 500, and Chipper Jones
struck out in that key situation.
62
00:04:45,950 --> 00:04:49,886
He's 0 for 5,
lost three straight games.
63
00:04:49,954 --> 00:04:54,084
This month he has
a one-game winning streak.
64
00:04:56,828 --> 00:05:01,788
Miss? Miss, can I have
another one of these, please?
65
00:05:01,866 --> 00:05:05,802
Oh, sorry.
I thought you were a woman.
66
00:05:05,870 --> 00:05:08,100
I am a woman.
67
00:05:09,974 --> 00:05:12,306
You know, you look
kind of familiar.
68
00:05:12,377 --> 00:05:14,902
Yeah, you do.
69
00:05:15,980 --> 00:05:18,005
You know, I get that
all the time.
70
00:05:18,082 --> 00:05:20,482
I guess I just have
one of those faces.
71
00:05:20,551 --> 00:05:24,180
And now for our loser of the week.
This week it's a no-brainer.
72
00:05:24,255 --> 00:05:26,746
Referee Owen Templeton made
the biggest bonehead call...
73
00:05:26,824 --> 00:05:28,758
in the history of football.
74
00:05:28,826 --> 00:05:33,195
It happened last Sunday at Dallas
with the score tied at 10.
75
00:05:33,264 --> 00:05:35,494
They were headed towards overtime.
Everything was cool.
76
00:05:35,566 --> 00:05:37,659
They were about to toss the coin
to see who would kick off.
77
00:05:37,735 --> 00:05:41,296
- Dallas, call it in the air.
- Tails.
78
00:05:41,372 --> 00:05:43,966
- That's heads.
- That was tails.
79
00:05:44,042 --> 00:05:46,169
- No. It's...
- That was tails.
80
00:05:46,244 --> 00:05:49,577
No... Wait! Hang on!
It's... Now, what did I say?
81
00:05:49,647 --> 00:05:51,615
- Tails!
- It's tails.
82
00:05:51,683 --> 00:05:54,675
- It's heads.
- What are you doin'?
83
00:05:56,721 --> 00:05:59,519
You saw...
84
00:05:59,590 --> 00:06:02,354
Okay, little brother,
just be cool.
85
00:06:02,427 --> 00:06:04,361
Just be cool.
86
00:06:17,976 --> 00:06:21,343
Okay, this is it.
See that glass?
87
00:06:21,412 --> 00:06:25,007
Walk across the lobby, slip on
the glass, let gravity do the rest.
88
00:06:25,984 --> 00:06:27,918
I might "eak" my neck.
89
00:06:27,986 --> 00:06:32,047
True. You could break your neck.
It's a risk I'm willing to take.
90
00:06:32,123 --> 00:06:35,058
Why don't "oo" do it?
91
00:06:35,126 --> 00:06:38,152
Because, Einstein, one of us
needs to be the victim...
92
00:06:38,229 --> 00:06:41,062
and one of us needs
to be the witness.
93
00:06:41,132 --> 00:06:44,499
I'm your own brother.
I don't know what you're sayin'.
94
00:06:44,569 --> 00:06:46,696
How's your tongue?
Let me see it.
95
00:06:50,174 --> 00:06:51,505
How's it look?
96
00:06:53,211 --> 00:06:57,375
It looks good.
It looks much better.
97
00:06:58,349 --> 00:06:59,782
Okay, here we go.
98
00:06:59,851 --> 00:07:04,220
We're on Candid Camera,
so make it look good.
99
00:07:15,466 --> 00:07:17,934
Excuse me. I'm a lawyer.
Gloria Allred.
100
00:07:18,002 --> 00:07:20,732
- What the hell happened here?
- She slipped on that glass.
101
00:07:20,805 --> 00:07:25,139
Those arrogant jerks. They're gonna
pay for this through the nose.
102
00:07:25,209 --> 00:07:27,905
How's your neck?
I've never seen such negligence.
103
00:07:27,979 --> 00:07:29,913
This is going to be huge.
104
00:07:30,014 --> 00:07:31,914
She's an angel.
105
00:07:31,983 --> 00:07:35,441
What a cute little face.
Would you look at those cheeks?
106
00:07:35,520 --> 00:07:38,284
- She's absolutely beautiful.
- She has your eyes.
107
00:07:38,356 --> 00:07:40,517
It's the only picture
I have of her.
108
00:07:40,591 --> 00:07:42,525
It's all worn out 'cause
I'm always looking at it.
109
00:07:42,593 --> 00:07:46,427
- You haven't seen her for 27 years?
- Not till today.
110
00:07:46,497 --> 00:07:49,557
- She just called you out of the blue?
- No, I found her.
111
00:07:49,634 --> 00:07:54,333
I hired a detective. I spent all
my money. Now we're going to meet.
112
00:07:54,405 --> 00:07:57,397
- You think she'll recognize me?
- Of course she will, won't she?
113
00:07:57,475 --> 00:07:59,409
- Yeah.
- She will.
114
00:08:20,398 --> 00:08:22,332
Vera Baker.
115
00:08:23,401 --> 00:08:25,335
My baby...
116
00:08:29,073 --> 00:08:32,270
Excuse me.
I have to take this.
117
00:08:33,344 --> 00:08:34,834
This is Merrill.
118
00:08:37,181 --> 00:08:39,274
No! That's unacceptable!
119
00:08:39,350 --> 00:08:43,150
If we don't ship by Tuesday, we won't
be in the stores by Mother's Day.
120
00:08:43,221 --> 00:08:46,156
That's unacceptable, so don't
give me any excuses, and do it!
121
00:08:46,224 --> 00:08:49,022
Do it!
Just shut up and get it done!
122
00:08:51,696 --> 00:08:55,132
Oh, honey,
you broke your phone.
123
00:08:55,199 --> 00:08:59,295
It's okay. I carry extras.
124
00:09:01,672 --> 00:09:04,903
- Why don't we sit down?
- Yes.
125
00:09:12,984 --> 00:09:16,317
You probably have
a thousand questions for me.
126
00:09:17,722 --> 00:09:21,351
I was young. I didn't tell
anybody I was pregnant.
127
00:09:21,425 --> 00:09:25,054
And I felt I could handle it
at the time.
128
00:09:25,129 --> 00:09:27,927
Hi. Do you think
you gals could...
129
00:09:27,999 --> 00:09:30,024
pull yourselves together
and bring us a drink?
130
00:09:30,101 --> 00:09:32,126
- Yeah.
- Sure.
131
00:09:32,203 --> 00:09:34,194
Sure. What would you like?
132
00:09:34,272 --> 00:09:36,536
Mimosa.
133
00:09:36,607 --> 00:09:40,543
They both want a mimosa.
134
00:09:40,611 --> 00:09:44,342
So, you sell cosmetics?
135
00:09:44,415 --> 00:09:48,078
Yeah. I have my own company.
136
00:09:48,152 --> 00:09:50,017
And we're going public.
137
00:09:51,088 --> 00:09:54,182
And you're not married?
138
00:09:54,258 --> 00:09:57,694
- Lucianne said you wouldn't.
- Who?
139
00:09:57,762 --> 00:10:00,993
She's my psychic. She's the one
who told me to come look for you.
140
00:10:01,065 --> 00:10:03,033
She said you needed me.
141
00:10:03,100 --> 00:10:06,763
- She did?
- She said you were lonely...
142
00:10:06,837 --> 00:10:11,433
and you were worried about money
and you had trouble sleeping.
143
00:10:14,345 --> 00:10:18,645
Who the hell isn't?
144
00:10:24,822 --> 00:10:26,790
See? I told you
we didn't need a bellman.
145
00:10:26,857 --> 00:10:30,554
Yeah, well, congratulations, Randy.
You avoided another tip.
146
00:10:30,628 --> 00:10:32,687
Those nickels and dimes
add up, my dear.
147
00:10:32,763 --> 00:10:34,822
- I call this bed!
- Hey, no fair.
148
00:10:34,899 --> 00:10:37,163
- You got to pick last night.
- Go to hell, Jason.
149
00:10:37,235 --> 00:10:39,169
- Make me.
- Hey, language, please.
150
00:10:39,237 --> 00:10:41,398
- Bev, his and her bathrobes.
- Yes.
151
00:10:41,472 --> 00:10:43,440
- Look at that view.
- Yeah.
152
00:10:43,507 --> 00:10:48,410
- Nice view.
- Okay, honey. Why don't you unpack?
153
00:10:48,479 --> 00:10:51,175
- Okay.
- I'm just gonna go look around.
154
00:10:51,249 --> 00:10:55,015
Wait, wait, wait.
You're not going to the casino?
155
00:10:55,086 --> 00:10:58,487
No, no, of course not.
156
00:10:58,556 --> 00:11:02,356
I just drove from the Grand Canyon.
Gotta stretch my legs.
157
00:11:02,426 --> 00:11:05,953
You swore to me on your mother's eyes
we are here to see David Copperfield.
158
00:11:06,030 --> 00:11:09,734
- No gambling.
- I'm just lookin' around.
159
00:11:10,801 --> 00:11:14,202
In fact, I'm gonna go
to the gift shop.
160
00:11:14,271 --> 00:11:16,330
I can jump farther than you.
161
00:11:16,407 --> 00:11:18,875
- I can jump farther.
- No way. Watch.
162
00:11:21,512 --> 00:11:25,141
That's gotta hurt.
Honey, kids need ya.
163
00:11:25,216 --> 00:11:27,548
- Hey, Nick. Nicky!
- Hey.
164
00:11:27,618 --> 00:11:29,916
- You're not leaving?
- I'm in court on Tuesday.
165
00:11:29,987 --> 00:11:33,423
- No, you're not.
- I work for people who are.
166
00:11:33,491 --> 00:11:36,289
You pussy. You can't leave.
It's still goin' on up there.
167
00:11:36,360 --> 00:11:38,726
Richie, I have to.
I've had two hours sleep.
168
00:11:38,796 --> 00:11:41,697
Steve Cunningham just got another
stripper. You got to see this one.
169
00:11:41,766 --> 00:11:43,700
- She's incredible.
- I got to get back.
170
00:11:43,768 --> 00:11:46,965
No, you don't, Nick.
I know you. You're scared.
171
00:11:47,037 --> 00:11:50,006
You're scared it's gonna
get out of control up there.
172
00:11:50,074 --> 00:11:52,474
Someday you'll be up for attorney
general and it'll haunt you.
173
00:11:52,543 --> 00:11:55,671
- I'm not having this conversation.
- You didn't even gamble.
174
00:11:55,746 --> 00:11:58,044
Not one quarter.
That's no way to live.
175
00:11:58,115 --> 00:12:01,175
In fact, that ain't even livin'.
It's hiding.
176
00:12:01,252 --> 00:12:03,914
- I'm not hiding from anything.
- Oh, no?
177
00:12:03,988 --> 00:12:06,479
Okay, then prove it.
178
00:12:06,557 --> 00:12:09,321
Do something, anything.
Break one rule.
179
00:12:09,393 --> 00:12:14,330
Here. Look. Nick, a paper.
Come on. Take it.
180
00:12:14,398 --> 00:12:18,061
Take it. Come on, Nick.
Take it.
181
00:12:22,239 --> 00:12:24,434
I have a plane to catch, okay?
182
00:12:24,508 --> 00:12:27,102
I'll see you in Chicago.
183
00:12:28,746 --> 00:12:31,408
Oh, look, I won! I won!
184
00:12:31,482 --> 00:12:33,541
Look at the money comin' down.
185
00:12:33,617 --> 00:12:36,780
Look. Look, look, look.
What's... What's...
186
00:12:36,854 --> 00:12:40,950
"You're a winner.
See guest services."
187
00:12:42,626 --> 00:12:45,356
What? A dollar?
188
00:12:49,600 --> 00:12:51,534
Come on, baby. Come on!
189
00:13:08,152 --> 00:13:09,084
Come on.
190
00:13:10,521 --> 00:13:11,783
We won!
191
00:13:14,024 --> 00:13:19,223
- We won one.
- What is this? This isn't money.
192
00:13:37,548 --> 00:13:39,778
That's the prize?
A free buffet?
193
00:13:39,850 --> 00:13:41,943
Actually, it's not a buffet.
194
00:13:42,019 --> 00:13:45,614
It's a special reception at 10:00
in the penthouse conference room.
195
00:13:45,689 --> 00:13:48,283
"Where a spectacular...
196
00:13:48,359 --> 00:13:51,522
once-in-a-lifetime
opportunity awaits you."
197
00:13:51,595 --> 00:13:53,529
That's all I know.
198
00:13:53,597 --> 00:13:56,361
- What do you think?
- I think it's some kind of scam.
199
00:13:56,433 --> 00:13:58,993
Good! A scam! We'll do it.
200
00:13:59,069 --> 00:14:02,038
- I'll need to see some I.D.
- Okay.
201
00:14:15,219 --> 00:14:17,312
There. I gambled.
202
00:14:23,894 --> 00:14:25,262
Family vacation? These are
the moments you got to savor, right?
203
00:14:25,262 --> 00:14:27,787
Family vacation? These are
the moments you got to savor, right?
204
00:14:27,865 --> 00:14:30,493
- They'll never come around again.
- Exactly.
205
00:14:30,567 --> 00:14:33,161
Excuse me.
Do you know what's going on?
206
00:14:33,237 --> 00:14:35,171
Free grub.
That's what's going on.
207
00:14:35,239 --> 00:14:37,707
This room is fabulous.
208
00:14:37,775 --> 00:14:41,074
- Does anybody know why we're here?
- Beats me.
209
00:14:42,146 --> 00:14:44,114
Oh, my God.
210
00:14:44,181 --> 00:14:46,240
You should sue somebody.
211
00:14:46,317 --> 00:14:47,841
I did it myself.
212
00:14:47,918 --> 00:14:51,354
- What?
- He did it himself from a kit.
213
00:14:51,422 --> 00:14:56,689
I knew I recognized you.
You're the referee... the bonehead.
214
00:14:56,760 --> 00:15:00,355
That's just the media
blowing it out of proportion.
215
00:15:00,431 --> 00:15:04,697
My hairdresser's husband
lost $800 because of you.
216
00:15:04,768 --> 00:15:07,293
- Everybody thinks we flip quarters.
- Can I have a picture with you?
217
00:15:07,371 --> 00:15:09,430
It's really
a commemorative coin. Look.
218
00:15:09,506 --> 00:15:11,440
- Smile.
- Please. You...
219
00:15:13,510 --> 00:15:18,038
Am I too late?
Look. I won a coin.
220
00:15:18,115 --> 00:15:23,348
A gold coin.
Isn't this wonderful?
221
00:15:23,420 --> 00:15:25,615
Look at this room.
222
00:15:25,689 --> 00:15:30,854
What a beautiful room.
Have you seen this room?
223
00:15:30,928 --> 00:15:33,920
Yes! We're in it.
224
00:15:36,700 --> 00:15:39,191
I am Enrico Pollini.
225
00:15:39,269 --> 00:15:43,569
Now, I know what you are thinking.
Enrico is a girl's name.
226
00:15:43,640 --> 00:15:46,404
- No, I wasn't.
- No pun intended.
227
00:15:46,477 --> 00:15:51,244
- What pun is that?
- Food. Look at all this food.
228
00:15:51,315 --> 00:15:57,151
What a beautiful party.
Little cockdoggies.
229
00:15:57,221 --> 00:15:58,882
They're called
cocktail wienies.
230
00:15:58,956 --> 00:16:03,825
Wienies. I'm so sorry.
My English is not so good.
231
00:16:03,894 --> 00:16:06,658
But I'm learning.
232
00:16:06,730 --> 00:16:09,198
That's it. Vera.
We're outta here.
233
00:16:09,266 --> 00:16:11,598
- I want to say good-bye. Bye, y'all.
- Excuse me.
234
00:16:11,668 --> 00:16:16,537
Thank you all for coming. I'm
Donald Sinclair. I own this hotel.
235
00:16:16,607 --> 00:16:18,768
We don't have much time.
236
00:16:18,842 --> 00:16:24,542
There's a meteor the size of North
Carolina heading straight for Earth.
237
00:16:24,615 --> 00:16:29,882
The impact is going to kill every
thing and everyone on this planet.
238
00:16:29,953 --> 00:16:34,788
I built a bunker in the basement
strong enough to withstand the blast.
239
00:16:34,858 --> 00:16:37,918
There's room for eight people. I have
chosen the seven of you, plus me.
240
00:16:37,995 --> 00:16:43,695
When this is over, we will repopulate
and re-civilize the planet.
241
00:16:52,709 --> 00:16:57,043
I couldn't resist! I'm sorry.
242
00:17:00,551 --> 00:17:03,213
A joke. He made a joke.
243
00:17:03,287 --> 00:17:07,656
Do sit down, please. Merrill, you
and your mother can sit over here.
244
00:17:07,724 --> 00:17:11,387
- How do you know she's my mother?
- Alas, there are no secrets anymore.
245
00:17:11,462 --> 00:17:15,728
Actually, that's not quite true.
There is one secret, one last secret.
246
00:17:15,799 --> 00:17:20,293
It involves all of you.
247
00:17:21,772 --> 00:17:25,230
- I'm getting goose pimples.
- Hey...
248
00:17:26,276 --> 00:17:28,073
Ah, Mr. Schaffer!
249
00:17:28,145 --> 00:17:31,876
Curiosity got the better
of you, eh? Come and sit down.
250
00:17:31,949 --> 00:17:35,851
- I'm fine. Thanks.
- You haven't missed anything.
251
00:17:35,919 --> 00:17:37,887
We were just
cutting to the chase.
252
00:17:37,955 --> 00:17:40,719
Cutting to the chase.
253
00:17:44,128 --> 00:17:46,221
Well, you'll laugh later.
254
00:17:46,296 --> 00:17:50,062
Now, as you know, the odds against
winning a jackpot downstairs...
255
00:17:50,134 --> 00:17:53,433
or hitting the state lottery
are astronomical... millions to one.
256
00:17:53,504 --> 00:17:57,201
A serious person doesn't
even bother, but today...
257
00:17:57,274 --> 00:18:00,675
you have the chance
of playing a game...
258
00:18:00,744 --> 00:18:03,611
where the odds of winning
are one in six.
259
00:18:03,680 --> 00:18:06,547
One in six.
260
00:18:07,784 --> 00:18:09,183
It's one throw...
261
00:18:11,655 --> 00:18:13,680
of the dice.
262
00:18:17,828 --> 00:18:20,160
This is my attorney,
Mr. Grisham...
263
00:18:20,230 --> 00:18:23,597
who tragically was born
without a personality.
264
00:18:23,667 --> 00:18:28,070
Mr. Grisham insists anyone who wishes
to participate in our experiment...
265
00:18:28,138 --> 00:18:33,075
sign this waiver, absolving the casino
from responsibility or damages...
266
00:18:33,143 --> 00:18:36,977
personal liability,
blah, blah, blah.
267
00:18:37,047 --> 00:18:40,448
So, who do you like, Claude?
268
00:18:40,517 --> 00:18:43,509
The young woman in the black coat.
She looks desperate.
269
00:18:43,587 --> 00:18:46,021
Yes, but she has
her mother with her.
270
00:18:46,089 --> 00:18:49,786
- That could slow her down, hmm?
- Perhaps.
271
00:18:49,860 --> 00:18:53,296
Now, 563 miles from here...
272
00:18:53,363 --> 00:18:56,457
is a little town called
Silver City, New Mexico.
273
00:18:56,533 --> 00:18:58,797
- Gold rush.
- Quite right, Nick.
274
00:18:58,869 --> 00:19:01,235
Yes, they struck gold there
in 1860.
275
00:19:01,305 --> 00:19:04,075
It was the second largest
gold rush in American history.
276
00:19:04,208 --> 00:19:08,736
Very good, Nick. I think
Nick should be our captain.
277
00:19:11,682 --> 00:19:15,345
In downtown Silver City,
there's a train station.
278
00:19:15,419 --> 00:19:18,149
As you go in the front door,
there's some lockers on the right.
279
00:19:18,222 --> 00:19:20,622
Mr. Grisham,
do you have the keys?
280
00:19:21,692 --> 00:19:23,683
Six identical keys.
281
00:19:24,562 --> 00:19:26,860
They all open the same locker.
282
00:19:26,931 --> 00:19:29,798
That's locker 001.
283
00:19:29,867 --> 00:19:33,564
Inside the locker is a red duffel
bag. Inside the red duffel bag...
284
00:19:33,637 --> 00:19:35,935
is $2 million.
285
00:19:36,006 --> 00:19:40,807
In cash, fifties and hundreds,
makes a pile about so big.
286
00:19:40,878 --> 00:19:43,904
First one there keeps it all.
287
00:19:45,616 --> 00:19:50,315
I put transmitting devices in
your key rings to keep track of you.
288
00:19:50,387 --> 00:19:54,448
And that's it.
289
00:19:54,525 --> 00:19:55,457
Go.
290
00:19:58,162 --> 00:20:00,494
You just can't pick people
at random.
291
00:20:00,564 --> 00:20:02,930
I can do anything I like, Owen.
I'm eccentric.
292
00:20:04,568 --> 00:20:05,500
Go!
293
00:20:05,569 --> 00:20:08,299
Wait, wait.
So, it's like a race?
294
00:20:09,473 --> 00:20:11,703
A race. It's a race.
295
00:20:11,775 --> 00:20:13,868
I hope I win.
296
00:20:13,944 --> 00:20:16,242
What are the rules?
297
00:20:16,313 --> 00:20:20,079
There's only one rule.
Are you ready? Here it is.
298
00:20:20,818 --> 00:20:24,185
There are no rules.
299
00:20:24,255 --> 00:20:26,189
Go.
300
00:20:27,992 --> 00:20:29,482
Go!
301
00:20:29,560 --> 00:20:33,894
So now when you say, "Go,"
you mean just go?
302
00:20:33,964 --> 00:20:37,422
Begin, commence, start moving.
303
00:20:37,501 --> 00:20:41,437
Theoretically, you have been
racing for about 40 seconds.
304
00:20:41,505 --> 00:20:44,030
So far, Mr. Schaffer is winning...
305
00:20:44,108 --> 00:20:47,043
because he's nearest to the door.
306
00:20:54,952 --> 00:20:56,715
You're crazy!
307
00:20:56,787 --> 00:21:00,814
A race! A race!
You have to pace yourself.
308
00:21:00,891 --> 00:21:04,827
Carbohydrate is important.
Pasta is good.
309
00:21:04,895 --> 00:21:07,523
Breathing is important.
310
00:21:08,999 --> 00:21:12,457
Scusi. One...
311
00:21:13,337 --> 00:21:16,204
It's some sort of joke.
It has to be.
312
00:21:16,273 --> 00:21:19,606
What kind of jackass
just gives away $2 million?
313
00:21:19,677 --> 00:21:22,202
Maybe it's a publicity stunt.
314
00:21:22,279 --> 00:21:25,612
What kind of publicity?
He swore us all to secrecy.
315
00:21:25,683 --> 00:21:30,484
- Maybe it's a secret publicity stunt.
- A secret publicity stunt?
316
00:21:30,554 --> 00:21:31,987
Yes!
317
00:21:32,056 --> 00:21:34,115
I don't know what his angle is,
but there's always an angle.
318
00:21:34,191 --> 00:21:37,251
Donald Sinclair... People like him
make millions of dollars...
319
00:21:37,328 --> 00:21:40,058
playing people
like us for chumps.
320
00:21:40,130 --> 00:21:42,325
- I'm nobody's chump.
- So you don't believe...
321
00:21:42,399 --> 00:21:46,233
11:30, nonstop to Chicago.
I'm gonna be on it.
322
00:21:46,971 --> 00:21:49,166
You know what? He's right.
323
00:21:49,240 --> 00:21:51,731
I'm not cuttin' short
my first family vacation...
324
00:21:51,809 --> 00:21:54,334
in three years to go on
some half-assed wild goose chase.
325
00:21:54,411 --> 00:21:58,142
Okay, so,
you're not goin' for it?
326
00:22:00,217 --> 00:22:01,912
I don't think so.
327
00:22:01,986 --> 00:22:04,614
- Not me, no.
- No. Great.
328
00:22:04,688 --> 00:22:07,122
- I guess that's that, huh?
- Right.
329
00:22:07,191 --> 00:22:09,887
It was nice meetin' y'all.
I'm gonna take the stairs.
330
00:22:09,960 --> 00:22:12,929
My room's just two floors down,
so nice meetin' ya.
331
00:22:12,997 --> 00:22:15,227
Hey, have a nice vacation.
332
00:22:22,673 --> 00:22:24,698
You know, it's probably stuck.
333
00:22:25,843 --> 00:22:28,812
I think I'm gonna
take the stairs too.
334
00:22:37,121 --> 00:22:38,383
Crap.
335
00:22:41,458 --> 00:22:43,824
- Go, go, go, go!
- Come on, Vera!
336
00:22:48,565 --> 00:22:51,159
Watch out!
337
00:22:52,403 --> 00:22:54,564
Comin' through!
338
00:22:59,343 --> 00:23:01,038
Hold the door, please.
339
00:23:01,111 --> 00:23:03,875
Take your time. No rush.
340
00:23:03,947 --> 00:23:05,972
- Get up!
- Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!
341
00:23:06,050 --> 00:23:10,714
If we're all gonna go for it,
why don't we go for it together?
342
00:23:10,788 --> 00:23:13,814
You know, split the money 50-50.
343
00:23:13,891 --> 00:23:17,691
- Fifty-fifty?
- You know what I mean. Whatever.
344
00:23:17,761 --> 00:23:19,695
Yes, yes, that's a good plan.
345
00:23:19,763 --> 00:23:22,857
It's a race. It's a race.
346
00:23:22,933 --> 00:23:26,061
I'm winning. I'm winning.
347
00:23:29,306 --> 00:23:31,069
And they're off!
348
00:23:32,276 --> 00:23:37,373
No one... No one is offering you
action like this.
349
00:23:37,448 --> 00:23:40,611
A horse race with animals
that can think and plan...
350
00:23:40,684 --> 00:23:45,519
and lie and cheat
and play dirty.
351
00:23:45,589 --> 00:23:48,854
It's the gambling experience
of a lifetime.
352
00:23:48,926 --> 00:23:53,226
It's my way of saying
I understand men like you.
353
00:23:53,297 --> 00:23:55,128
I know what you want.
I know what you need.
354
00:23:55,199 --> 00:24:00,102
This casino... my casino...
is where you belong.
355
00:24:02,373 --> 00:24:04,807
- I got it!
- Excuse me!
356
00:24:04,875 --> 00:24:07,241
- To the airport.
- You got it.
357
00:24:07,311 --> 00:24:09,939
We're out the door.
I don't see you. Where are you?
358
00:24:10,013 --> 00:24:14,416
- I forgot to tip the maid.
- Forget the maid. There he is!
359
00:24:14,485 --> 00:24:16,885
- Come on! Let's go!
- Okay, okay.
360
00:24:17,955 --> 00:24:22,221
Bev, this is a real job!
I swear!
361
00:24:23,627 --> 00:24:24,958
What is it?
362
00:24:27,131 --> 00:24:29,156
The job? What's the job?
363
00:24:31,335 --> 00:24:33,735
Ink for fountain pens.
364
00:24:36,173 --> 00:24:39,142
- And they're in New Mexico?
- Silver City, New Mexico.
365
00:24:39,209 --> 00:24:42,940
I love New Mexico.
Honey, we'll go with you.
366
00:24:43,013 --> 00:24:45,777
- No!
- Why not?
367
00:24:46,650 --> 00:24:50,780
Because we've already paid for the
room. Now look who's wasting money.
368
00:24:51,855 --> 00:24:53,823
This was your idea to stop here.
369
00:24:53,891 --> 00:24:56,860
I don't care about David Copperfield.
We're on vacation. We'll go with you.
370
00:24:56,927 --> 00:25:00,419
- But you don't understand...
- We will go with you!
371
00:25:03,834 --> 00:25:04,858
- Fine.
- Yes!
372
00:25:04,935 --> 00:25:07,870
Fine. Fine. Here. Call the bellman.
Have him bring the van around.
373
00:25:07,938 --> 00:25:10,031
- You happy? You happy?
- Okay.
374
00:25:10,107 --> 00:25:14,567
Scusi. Scusi.
I'm in a race. Scusi.
375
00:25:14,645 --> 00:25:17,409
Scusi. It's a race.
376
00:25:31,595 --> 00:25:35,122
- What is he doing?
- I think he's sleeping.
377
00:25:35,199 --> 00:25:37,167
- Sleeping?
- He must be narcoleptic.
378
00:25:37,234 --> 00:25:39,168
It's a rare sleeping disorder.
379
00:25:39,236 --> 00:25:42,603
- But I bet on him!
- So did I. Two million dollars.
380
00:25:42,673 --> 00:25:45,198
I'm sorry, gentlemen.
All the bets are locked in.
381
00:25:45,275 --> 00:25:47,243
Sleeping! Sleeping!
382
00:25:55,752 --> 00:25:57,845
- Look out!
- Don't tell me how to drive!
383
00:25:57,921 --> 00:25:59,548
It's only yellow.
It's only yellow. Run it!
384
00:26:01,592 --> 00:26:05,255
- Where's my video game?
- Seat belts, everyone.
385
00:26:05,329 --> 00:26:09,732
- Honey, what is the rush?
- It's the opportunity of a lifetime.
386
00:26:09,800 --> 00:26:12,564
You're not just a travel agent,
Roger. You're an angel.
387
00:26:12,636 --> 00:26:15,230
There's one charter plane
available in Las Vegas.
388
00:26:15,305 --> 00:26:17,273
We just bagged it.
389
00:26:17,341 --> 00:26:19,275
- Back to pass.
- Get rid of it.
390
00:26:19,343 --> 00:26:22,835
- Looks to his left.
- Get rid of it. Throw the ball!
391
00:26:22,913 --> 00:26:25,438
That's why you're not
gonna get drafted!
392
00:26:25,516 --> 00:26:28,542
You'll be lucky to play
arena football in Barcelona!
393
00:26:28,619 --> 00:26:31,452
- You like football?
- Sure.
394
00:26:31,522 --> 00:26:35,549
Did you happen to catch
that Dallas game last week?
395
00:26:35,626 --> 00:26:40,689
It was an obscenity.
It was a crime against football.
396
00:26:40,764 --> 00:26:43,494
I lost 20 grand on that game!
And they would have won!
397
00:26:43,567 --> 00:26:47,025
Now I gotta work two shifts
because of that idiot!
398
00:26:47,104 --> 00:26:51,268
Stevie Wonder could have done
a better job calling that game.
399
00:26:53,477 --> 00:26:55,411
Where the hell's the airport?
400
00:26:57,414 --> 00:27:01,009
One flip of the coin and the franchise
goes straight down the crapper.
401
00:27:01,084 --> 00:27:03,211
- That'll be 10.50, buddy.
- Keep the change.
402
00:27:04,321 --> 00:27:07,882
Thanks a lot.
You have a nice flight. Yeah!
403
00:27:07,958 --> 00:27:10,085
You know who that was?
404
00:27:10,160 --> 00:27:14,187
That was the ref. The guy
from the game? The coin toss!
405
00:27:14,264 --> 00:27:17,199
Oh, my God!
You're right! That was him!
406
00:27:17,267 --> 00:27:19,569
I had him in the cab,
and I let him go!
407
00:27:19,702 --> 00:27:22,364
- Where are we going?
- We gotta go. Come on. Just go.
408
00:27:22,438 --> 00:27:25,669
- Go, go, go, go, go.
- Chumps.
409
00:27:51,033 --> 00:27:53,194
Excuse me. Hi.
410
00:27:53,936 --> 00:27:57,372
- I'm not a creep or anything.
- I don't have any quarters.
411
00:27:59,709 --> 00:28:02,974
I never do this, but I'm
reading the same book you are.
412
00:28:03,045 --> 00:28:05,206
Look. See? Lindbergh.
413
00:28:05,281 --> 00:28:07,215
It's fantastic, isn't it?
414
00:28:07,283 --> 00:28:11,117
- What part are you on?
- He just had a sex change.
415
00:28:11,187 --> 00:28:13,280
Who did? Lindbergh?
416
00:28:13,356 --> 00:28:15,790
- Sex change?
- Yeah.
417
00:28:19,895 --> 00:28:21,192
That's funny.
418
00:28:21,263 --> 00:28:23,060
- I thought so.
- That's funny.
419
00:28:23,132 --> 00:28:25,066
I wouldn't be too proud
of yourself though.
420
00:28:25,134 --> 00:28:27,068
I'm the most gullible guy
in Chicago.
421
00:28:30,606 --> 00:28:32,164
Can I buy you a drink?
422
00:28:33,175 --> 00:28:34,733
I can't. I'm flying.
423
00:28:34,810 --> 00:28:39,907
- So, it'll relax you.
- I mean, I'm flying. I'm a pilot.
424
00:28:43,319 --> 00:28:46,152
Pilot? Are there
a lot of female pilots?
425
00:28:47,223 --> 00:28:48,815
There's at least one.
426
00:28:51,994 --> 00:28:55,395
When I walk away, I'm gonna think
of something great to say to that.
427
00:28:55,464 --> 00:28:58,092
Good. Mail it to me.
428
00:29:03,272 --> 00:29:05,536
Flight 115 to
Albuquerque, New Mexico.
429
00:29:05,608 --> 00:29:08,634
- Gate 17. You better hurry.
- Four tickets to Albuquerque.
430
00:29:08,711 --> 00:29:11,544
- Near the front of the plane. Please.
- All right.
431
00:29:11,614 --> 00:29:13,548
Come on!
432
00:29:14,450 --> 00:29:17,578
This is so exciting. I've never
been on a private plane before.
433
00:29:17,653 --> 00:29:19,678
This is bigger than my condo.
434
00:29:19,755 --> 00:29:22,451
- Gentlemen, what's our ETA?
- One hour and ten minutes.
435
00:29:23,225 --> 00:29:25,693
If you can do it in less than
an hour, I'll buy you both dinner.
436
00:29:25,761 --> 00:29:27,456
You're on...
437
00:29:27,530 --> 00:29:30,556
- Watch it. Move. Excuse me. Move.
- Move! Move! Move!
438
00:29:30,633 --> 00:29:32,567
- Who was next?
- I was!
439
00:29:32,635 --> 00:29:33,897
- I was!
- I was!
440
00:29:33,969 --> 00:29:36,699
- What? You were not next!
- Are you callin' me a liar?
441
00:29:36,772 --> 00:29:40,469
Yeah, as a matter of fact, I am.
We've been in line over 20 minutes.
442
00:29:40,543 --> 00:29:43,910
- Is that the correct time?
- Hey! Whoa!
443
00:29:43,979 --> 00:29:46,209
Yes, it is.
444
00:29:47,216 --> 00:29:49,480
- Who's next?
- They were, right there.
445
00:29:49,552 --> 00:29:52,316
Two tickets to Albuquerque.
446
00:29:52,388 --> 00:29:56,757
I'm sorry. We're completely booked.
There's nothing.
447
00:29:56,826 --> 00:29:59,590
There's a 4:30,
but you have to switch in Dallas.
448
00:30:04,300 --> 00:30:09,101
What do you mean that's it? I'm
not givin' up and neither are you.
449
00:30:09,171 --> 00:30:12,868
And neither am I!
I'll tell you something, brother.
450
00:30:12,942 --> 00:30:16,878
If we're not flyin' outta here,
no one is flyin' outta here.
451
00:31:16,806 --> 00:31:18,239
That can't be good.
452
00:31:25,648 --> 00:31:28,242
Duane!
453
00:31:40,329 --> 00:31:41,819
No!
454
00:31:50,239 --> 00:31:52,764
Blaine! Blaine!
455
00:31:55,811 --> 00:31:59,508
Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit!
456
00:32:05,888 --> 00:32:07,515
Shit!
457
00:32:18,367 --> 00:32:21,734
I can't!
458
00:32:21,804 --> 00:32:25,934
What are you doin'?
I don't know where to go!
459
00:32:26,008 --> 00:32:27,942
- Move!
- Trying to kill me?
460
00:32:28,010 --> 00:32:32,310
Duane, stop the car!
Stop the car!
461
00:32:43,392 --> 00:32:47,419
Whoa, girl! Jesus!
462
00:33:00,809 --> 00:33:04,245
Freeze everything, every flight.
Get me Central Operations.
463
00:33:06,515 --> 00:33:08,449
Attention all passengers.
464
00:33:08,517 --> 00:33:10,985
Due to a technical problem
with our radar tracking system...
465
00:33:11,053 --> 00:33:13,521
all flights are postponed
until further notice.
466
00:33:13,589 --> 00:33:16,786
We apologize for
any inconvenience.
467
00:33:18,360 --> 00:33:19,292
We gotta go.
468
00:33:19,361 --> 00:33:20,658
- Hurry up!
- The bags?
469
00:33:20,729 --> 00:33:22,663
Forget the bags! Let's go!
470
00:33:22,731 --> 00:33:25,029
Comin' through!
471
00:33:26,101 --> 00:33:29,332
- This is your license?
- Yes, it is.
472
00:33:30,406 --> 00:33:32,340
- Where was it issued?
- In Guam.
473
00:33:36,278 --> 00:33:38,940
Just head east,
and I'm in a hurry.
474
00:33:39,815 --> 00:33:44,218
Hello again. East it is.
475
00:33:45,754 --> 00:33:48,814
We have a midsized Caprice.
476
00:33:48,891 --> 00:33:51,485
- What color is it?
- We don't care about color.
477
00:33:51,560 --> 00:33:54,188
Just give us whatever car
is parked closest to the door.
478
00:33:54,263 --> 00:33:56,788
Ask about insurance.
479
00:33:56,865 --> 00:34:00,164
Would you be interested
in purchasing liability insurance?
480
00:34:00,235 --> 00:34:02,829
- How much is it?
- It doesn't matter. We'll take it.
481
00:34:02,905 --> 00:34:04,896
Just hurry.
482
00:34:08,143 --> 00:34:11,306
Hit enter. Now shift.
483
00:34:12,381 --> 00:34:14,747
Shift key. Right there. Yeah.
484
00:34:18,487 --> 00:34:19,920
Hey, watch it!
485
00:34:19,989 --> 00:34:23,186
Bus! White people!
486
00:34:26,061 --> 00:34:26,993
Idiot!
487
00:34:28,063 --> 00:34:30,190
Okay, I've got one.
488
00:34:31,266 --> 00:34:33,564
- What?
- A great comeback.
489
00:34:35,838 --> 00:34:37,897
I said, "Are there
a lot of female pilots?"
490
00:34:37,973 --> 00:34:39,964
And you said,
"There's at least one."
491
00:34:40,042 --> 00:34:43,500
I should have said,
"Two if you count Lindbergh."
492
00:34:44,613 --> 00:34:46,604
'Cause you said
he had a sex change.
493
00:34:47,282 --> 00:34:49,216
It's a work in progress.
494
00:34:49,284 --> 00:34:51,616
- I'm Nick Schaffer.
- Tracy Faucet.
495
00:34:51,687 --> 00:34:53,678
So I guess you can have
that drink now.
496
00:34:53,756 --> 00:34:57,214
I told you I'm flying. I'm leaving
for Roswell in five minutes.
497
00:34:57,292 --> 00:34:59,556
Didn't you hear?
Everybody's grounded.
498
00:34:59,628 --> 00:35:03,758
That's for fixed wing. I'm in a
chopper. We use a different system.
499
00:35:10,005 --> 00:35:12,439
Roswell, New Mexico?
500
00:35:13,976 --> 00:35:17,275
- You're flying to New Mexico?
- We've been flying down all week.
501
00:35:17,346 --> 00:35:19,348
They're repainting
the whole fleet.
502
00:35:23,352 --> 00:35:27,652
You can fly.
Nobody else can fly.
503
00:35:27,723 --> 00:35:30,817
But you can fly.
504
00:35:30,892 --> 00:35:33,884
- And you're flying to New Mexico.
- Yeah.
505
00:35:33,962 --> 00:35:37,056
- But nobody else can fly.
- Yeah.
506
00:35:37,132 --> 00:35:40,397
Do you need a ride?
507
00:35:43,872 --> 00:35:46,397
Come on!
508
00:35:51,813 --> 00:35:54,611
- Coconut.
- Coconut! Who had coconut?
509
00:35:54,683 --> 00:35:57,481
I did.
510
00:35:57,552 --> 00:35:59,281
Phil.
511
00:36:00,856 --> 00:36:02,949
That's the kind of car
that I'm gettin'.
512
00:36:03,024 --> 00:36:05,788
- Yeah? Don't count on it.
- Why not?
513
00:36:05,861 --> 00:36:08,853
Because the Volkswagen Beetle
was used by the Nazis.
514
00:36:08,930 --> 00:36:12,195
I would not be comfortable
driving around in one.
515
00:36:12,267 --> 00:36:16,704
- So, don't drive it. I will.
- Dad, I have to go.
516
00:36:16,772 --> 00:36:20,264
- No, you don't.
- Yes, I do. I really do.
517
00:36:20,342 --> 00:36:24,642
- We just stopped!
- The bathroom was too gross.
518
00:36:24,713 --> 00:36:28,809
- Well, can't you hold it in?
- I can't! It's an emergency.
519
00:36:28,884 --> 00:36:30,818
Honey, there's a restaurant.
520
00:36:30,886 --> 00:36:33,855
That's three miles down and
then back. We lose ten minutes.
521
00:36:33,922 --> 00:36:36,152
So what? Your daughter
has to go to the bathroom.
522
00:36:36,224 --> 00:36:38,624
- Please stop, Dad.
- All right.
523
00:36:38,693 --> 00:36:41,321
Jason, look back there
for an empty jar.
524
00:36:41,396 --> 00:36:43,455
Ajar? Girls don't pee in jars.
525
00:36:43,532 --> 00:36:45,466
All right, sorry.
526
00:36:45,534 --> 00:36:49,197
Jason, we're gonna
need a jar and a funnel.
527
00:36:49,271 --> 00:36:51,865
Dad, I don't have to pee.
It's number two!
528
00:36:51,940 --> 00:36:56,377
- Sorry, I can't stop.
- Dad, I'm prairie-dogging it.
529
00:36:56,445 --> 00:36:57,878
What does that mean?
530
00:36:57,946 --> 00:37:01,643
Like when a prairie dog sticks
his head in and out of the ground.
531
00:37:06,288 --> 00:37:08,813
I do not want
to picture that.
532
00:37:09,891 --> 00:37:12,519
Yes, sir, Silver City it is.
533
00:37:12,594 --> 00:37:15,893
- Buddy.
- It's about 700 miles.
534
00:37:15,964 --> 00:37:20,333
- You don't mind, do ya?
- Oh, no. No, no, I don't mind.
535
00:37:20,402 --> 00:37:23,803
A job's just
another job for me.
536
00:37:23,872 --> 00:37:26,864
About how much you think
that's gonna cost?
537
00:37:26,942 --> 00:37:31,675
I wouldn't worry about it.
Tell you what.
538
00:37:31,746 --> 00:37:35,944
You just pay me
whatever you think is fair...
539
00:37:36,017 --> 00:37:40,852
'cause I trust your judgment.
540
00:37:40,922 --> 00:37:43,914
I hate you. I hate you!
541
00:37:43,992 --> 00:37:48,258
Nobody look. I'm gonna turn on
the radio, so nobody can hear you.
542
00:37:48,330 --> 00:37:50,264
I'll never forgive you.
I hate you.
543
00:37:50,332 --> 00:37:52,926
Nobody can hear you, honey.
Push away.
544
00:38:01,543 --> 00:38:04,671
I'm gonna drop you off there. There's
a parking lot near the hospital.
545
00:38:04,746 --> 00:38:08,273
- Great. Great.
- So what's wrong with her?
546
00:38:08,350 --> 00:38:11,251
- Who?
- Your sister. You said it's serious.
547
00:38:13,889 --> 00:38:16,153
Yeah. Shark bite.
548
00:38:17,225 --> 00:38:19,989
- A shark bite?
- Yeah.
549
00:38:20,061 --> 00:38:22,689
They took her to Silver City?
550
00:38:22,764 --> 00:38:26,131
They have a really good
shark attack unit there.
551
00:38:34,075 --> 00:38:36,009
How fast was I going?
552
00:38:43,652 --> 00:38:47,611
- Where are we?
- It's a shortcut I know.
553
00:38:47,689 --> 00:38:51,682
- Maybe we should stick to the highway.
- There's a thought.
554
00:38:51,760 --> 00:38:55,992
You say stick to the highway.
I say we should take my shortcut.
555
00:38:56,064 --> 00:39:00,763
- Why don't we just flip a coin?
- It's not what you think.
556
00:39:00,835 --> 00:39:04,134
- Come on, you blind son of a bitch!
- Wait! Stop it!
557
00:39:04,205 --> 00:39:07,936
Give me that goddamn whistle!
I'm gonna shove it up your ass!
558
00:39:08,009 --> 00:39:10,204
Come back here!
559
00:39:13,448 --> 00:39:16,246
Shit.
560
00:39:18,453 --> 00:39:20,978
I'll kill him.
561
00:39:38,440 --> 00:39:40,408
- Squirrel?
- No, thank you.
562
00:39:40,475 --> 00:39:42,909
We're looking for the interstate.
563
00:39:42,978 --> 00:39:46,505
I get that a lot
'cause of the detour.
564
00:39:47,816 --> 00:39:50,649
Now they've lost their way.
565
00:39:50,719 --> 00:39:54,883
Now they can't go home.
You sure you don't want one?
566
00:39:54,956 --> 00:39:56,651
We're sure. Thank you.
567
00:39:56,725 --> 00:40:00,388
They make crackerjack pets.
I taught this one to shake hands.
568
00:40:00,462 --> 00:40:04,558
He's not for sale though. Who wants
to go home with the nice ladies?
569
00:40:04,633 --> 00:40:07,932
"Pick me. Pick me.
Don't be afraid. I don't bite.
570
00:40:08,003 --> 00:40:12,372
- What's your name, pretty lady?"
- Vera.
571
00:40:12,440 --> 00:40:14,840
Ma'am, really.
We're not interested.
572
00:40:14,909 --> 00:40:18,003
Well, I'm not talkin' to you, am I?
I'm talkin' to Vera.
573
00:40:18,079 --> 00:40:22,516
What about Bucky here? He loves
to climb trees and eat nuts.
574
00:40:22,584 --> 00:40:24,677
Ma'am, we do not
want a squirrel.
575
00:40:24,753 --> 00:40:26,880
Do you or do you not know
where the interstate is?
576
00:40:26,955 --> 00:40:30,356
Of course I do. I'm not retarded.
"Tell 'em about the shortcut."
577
00:40:30,425 --> 00:40:32,791
Thank you, Bucky.
578
00:40:32,861 --> 00:40:36,297
I almost forgot.
There's a dandy shortcut.
579
00:40:36,364 --> 00:40:39,060
It'll bring you right to exit 14.
It'll save you 30 miles.
580
00:40:40,101 --> 00:40:42,194
Now listen carefully.
581
00:40:42,270 --> 00:40:45,728
You want to go straight
down here exactly 1.8 miles.
582
00:40:45,807 --> 00:40:50,107
- 1.8.
- Make a left at Totem Pole Ranch.
583
00:40:50,178 --> 00:40:52,942
Go 5.4 miles and
you're gonna go up a big hill.
584
00:40:53,014 --> 00:40:56,609
You'll see a big yellow sign
with some graffiti on it.
585
00:40:56,685 --> 00:41:01,247
Take the dirt road on the right.
It'll take you to the interstate.
586
00:41:01,322 --> 00:41:02,584
- Thank you.
- Thank you.
587
00:41:02,657 --> 00:41:07,026
Wait a minute.
Take some nuts with you...
588
00:41:07,095 --> 00:41:09,757
just in case
you see a squirrel, okay?
589
00:41:11,232 --> 00:41:15,669
"Bye. Bye.
You could have bought me."
590
00:41:15,737 --> 00:41:18,467
You'll make it. You'll make it.
591
00:41:25,080 --> 00:41:26,775
Where am I?
592
00:41:30,318 --> 00:41:33,446
Wow! A Barbie Museum!
Can we stop?
593
00:41:33,521 --> 00:41:37,855
Sorry, Kimmy. We have a plan,
and we're gonna stick to the plan.
594
00:41:37,926 --> 00:41:40,360
Please, Daddy. Please, please,
please, please, please.
595
00:41:40,428 --> 00:41:42,828
- Hey, hey!
- It's not fair.
596
00:41:42,897 --> 00:41:45,525
We never get to stop
anywhere I want to.
597
00:41:45,600 --> 00:41:48,831
I'm sure Jason doesn't want
to go to the Barbie Museum.
598
00:41:48,903 --> 00:41:52,339
You kiddin'? I'll stop anywhere.
I'm wiggin' out back here.
599
00:41:52,407 --> 00:41:56,036
You need to pull over and stop
to give the kids a break.
600
00:41:56,111 --> 00:41:58,011
Yeah, okay,
maybe on the way back.
601
00:41:58,079 --> 00:42:00,104
- Stop the car.
- I can't do that.
602
00:42:00,181 --> 00:42:02,172
- We all need to stop the car.
- No can do.
603
00:42:02,250 --> 00:42:04,616
- You need to stop the car.
- No!
604
00:42:04,686 --> 00:42:06,153
Stop the car!
605
00:42:12,861 --> 00:42:15,386
Okay, fine, but 10 minutes.
606
00:42:15,463 --> 00:42:18,796
Wow! The Barbie Museum.
607
00:42:19,868 --> 00:42:21,199
Klaus Barbie...
608
00:42:21,269 --> 00:42:23,567
sometimes known as
the Butcher of Lyons.
609
00:42:23,638 --> 00:42:27,665
Let the Jew revisionists
talk about their death camps...
610
00:42:27,742 --> 00:42:30,677
and so-called crimes
against humanity.
611
00:42:30,745 --> 00:42:36,206
This museum is lovingly dedicated to
the Klaus Barbie that nobody knows.
612
00:42:36,284 --> 00:42:40,050
The husband, the devoted father,
the wine connoisseur...
613
00:42:40,121 --> 00:42:43,056
and three-time
ballroom dancing champion.
614
00:42:50,165 --> 00:42:52,929
Hey, hey, there's that guy,
the "udgy" one.
615
00:42:55,303 --> 00:42:58,670
Barbie joined
the SS in 1935...
616
00:42:58,740 --> 00:43:02,574
where he soon became one of
the Fuhrer's favorite young officers.
617
00:43:02,644 --> 00:43:05,078
Can we go?
618
00:43:05,146 --> 00:43:08,343
Here we see him standing
beside Hitler's touring car...
619
00:43:08,416 --> 00:43:12,546
the very same car on display
outside in our courtyard.
620
00:43:12,620 --> 00:43:13,882
You're leaving?
621
00:43:15,456 --> 00:43:17,515
What...
622
00:43:17,592 --> 00:43:22,325
No... Yes. Well, we have a 4:30
book burning, and then we have a...
623
00:43:22,397 --> 00:43:24,422
- A christening.
- Yes, a christening...
624
00:43:24,499 --> 00:43:28,526
for one of our many white,
Christian, non-Jewish friends...
625
00:43:28,603 --> 00:43:34,269
- Family. Blood relatives.
- The Himmler Hessin Von Sturichberg...
626
00:43:34,342 --> 00:43:36,833
- Thank you so much.
- Yes, love your do.
627
00:43:36,911 --> 00:43:38,936
Thank you. It's beautiful.
We had a great time.
628
00:43:40,281 --> 00:43:41,942
Wow! A gift shop.
629
00:43:42,016 --> 00:43:45,315
Yes, I know, honey. Next time.
I promise. I really do.
630
00:43:45,386 --> 00:43:47,377
Just go. Just go.
631
00:43:47,455 --> 00:43:52,154
- Oh, my God! We've been cut!
- What do we do now?
632
00:43:53,228 --> 00:43:54,695
I say we take
the interstate.
633
00:43:54,762 --> 00:43:58,289
No, "ake" Highway "well."
That's a shortcut.
634
00:43:58,366 --> 00:44:02,063
You don't know what the shortcut
is. It could be a dirt road.
635
00:44:02,136 --> 00:44:06,038
You know what? There are
"oo" of us. Why don't we separate?
636
00:44:06,107 --> 00:44:09,076
- What?
- There's "oo" of us.
637
00:44:09,143 --> 00:44:12,579
"Amy" we should "ust" separate.
638
00:44:12,647 --> 00:44:16,344
You're right. You're a genius.
There's two of us.
639
00:44:16,417 --> 00:44:19,352
If we separate and you steal a car,
we can both go our own way...
640
00:44:19,420 --> 00:44:21,388
and double our chances
of gettin' there first.
641
00:44:21,456 --> 00:44:24,016
All right. You take the...
642
00:44:24,092 --> 00:44:26,390
We only got one "ee."
643
00:44:28,830 --> 00:44:32,960
Look, there it is.
Totem Pole Ranch, turn left.
644
00:44:33,034 --> 00:44:37,368
1.8 miles exactly.
All right, squirrel lady.
645
00:44:41,376 --> 00:44:46,109
I can't believe it, Dad. You stole
Adolf Hitler's Mercedes-Benz.
646
00:44:46,180 --> 00:44:50,446
Hitler had it comin'.
What goes around comes around.
647
00:44:50,518 --> 00:44:52,486
They're gonna be pissed.
648
00:44:52,553 --> 00:44:57,115
They're always pissed. They're
Nazis. It's like it's their job.
649
00:44:57,191 --> 00:45:02,493
When we get to Silver City, we'll
call 'em. We'll work somethin' out.
650
00:45:08,036 --> 00:45:09,469
North?
651
00:45:09,537 --> 00:45:11,971
A little detour.
It'll just take a minute.
652
00:45:12,040 --> 00:45:14,565
I just wanted to say hi
to my boyfriend.
653
00:45:22,817 --> 00:45:26,480
I can't believe it.
That... That son of a bitch!
654
00:45:26,554 --> 00:45:28,579
That's Charlene's car.
655
00:45:28,656 --> 00:45:32,023
- Charlene?
- His ex-girlfriend, or so I thought.
656
00:45:32,093 --> 00:45:36,291
Come on now. I'm sure there's
a perfectly innocent explanation.
657
00:45:36,364 --> 00:45:39,390
She probably came by just
to pick up some clothes or...
658
00:45:39,467 --> 00:45:42,493
Nice and warm.
659
00:45:48,710 --> 00:45:50,234
What the...
660
00:45:50,311 --> 00:45:52,575
Get down!
661
00:45:54,515 --> 00:45:58,110
Did I come at
a bad time, asshole?
662
00:46:00,755 --> 00:46:04,122
I'll ram this helicopter
right down your throat!
663
00:46:09,263 --> 00:46:10,355
What are you doing?
664
00:46:10,431 --> 00:46:15,198
Don't worry. My father's a navy pilot.
I've been flying since I was 15.
665
00:46:15,269 --> 00:46:18,136
I'm not worried about you.
I'm worried about me.
666
00:46:18,206 --> 00:46:22,768
Shawn, you have a minute? I want
to talk about our relationship.
667
00:46:36,891 --> 00:46:38,654
Suck on that, creep!
668
00:46:41,362 --> 00:46:44,297
- That's...
- Not the truck!
669
00:46:44,365 --> 00:46:47,300
Oh, my God!
670
00:46:47,368 --> 00:46:49,563
Come on. Help me. Open it.
671
00:46:49,637 --> 00:46:51,332
I'm not comfortable...
672
00:46:51,406 --> 00:46:53,340
- Open it!
- Okay.
673
00:46:59,847 --> 00:47:01,280
She's gonna kill me.
674
00:47:01,349 --> 00:47:03,909
- We should get outta here.
- Not yet!
675
00:47:05,019 --> 00:47:08,511
You two-timing,
backstabbing snake!
676
00:47:08,589 --> 00:47:10,750
You worm! You turd!
677
00:47:13,661 --> 00:47:19,361
My God! What was I thinking?
I want my five months back!
678
00:47:20,768 --> 00:47:23,328
I'm getting the tattoo removed!
679
00:47:27,408 --> 00:47:29,376
Stop hitting me!
680
00:47:29,444 --> 00:47:32,880
Where are you goin', baby?
Wait for me!
681
00:47:52,099 --> 00:47:56,866
- I think we just killed him.
- You can't! He's like a cockroach.
682
00:48:02,977 --> 00:48:04,410
Fix the...
683
00:48:08,583 --> 00:48:10,642
Should we be this low?
684
00:48:15,857 --> 00:48:19,224
Come on. Come on.
Let's keep goin'. Come on.
685
00:48:22,730 --> 00:48:26,097
We just violated
about 115 federal laws.
686
00:48:26,167 --> 00:48:28,829
- "We"?
- I'm getting out of here. Coming?
687
00:48:30,771 --> 00:48:32,705
I know things look bad...
688
00:48:34,842 --> 00:48:36,776
Nice meeting you.
689
00:48:39,981 --> 00:48:42,006
Get out of the truck, Shawn.
690
00:48:43,451 --> 00:48:45,544
That's it, Tracy.
You and I are through.
691
00:48:49,123 --> 00:48:50,715
Wait!
692
00:48:58,232 --> 00:49:01,895
Wait. This is the first illegal thing
I've done in my adult life.
693
00:49:01,969 --> 00:49:03,903
How does it feel?
694
00:49:03,971 --> 00:49:07,304
I'm shaking, but that could be
from the helicopter crash.
695
00:49:07,375 --> 00:49:11,641
- Get out of my truck, Tracy!
- It's my truck! I paid for it!
696
00:49:11,712 --> 00:49:13,304
- Who is this?
- Nobody.
697
00:49:13,381 --> 00:49:15,906
- You are nobody.
- Nobody.
698
00:49:15,983 --> 00:49:19,976
You stay away from her, nobody,
unless you're tired of livin'.
699
00:49:20,054 --> 00:49:24,286
While you're here, do me a favor.
Charlene left a bra in the truck.
700
00:49:24,358 --> 00:49:27,759
Could you make sure
she gets it? Thanks, honey.
701
00:49:27,828 --> 00:49:28,886
Help!
702
00:50:17,178 --> 00:50:20,170
- So where's the driver?
- He's in the powder room.
703
00:50:20,247 --> 00:50:23,978
Hell's bells. We're never
gonna get to Santa Fe by 3:00.
704
00:50:24,051 --> 00:50:25,985
- This is ridiculous.
- Ridiculous.
705
00:50:26,053 --> 00:50:30,091
I really wish he'd hurry.
It just seems very unprofessional.
706
00:50:37,031 --> 00:50:39,659
Mister, you gotta help me.
My wife...
707
00:50:39,733 --> 00:50:41,166
She's out back.
She's having a baby.
708
00:50:41,235 --> 00:50:43,203
- She's having a what?
- A baby!
709
00:50:43,270 --> 00:50:45,204
- She's having a baby?
- And it's halfway out!
710
00:50:45,272 --> 00:50:47,638
I can see the head!
711
00:50:47,708 --> 00:50:50,734
- I need your jacket.
- Why?
712
00:50:52,079 --> 00:50:54,980
For her amniotic sac!
713
00:50:55,049 --> 00:50:57,677
- Her amniotic fluid is gushing out.
- Gushing?
714
00:50:57,751 --> 00:51:00,914
The jacket! The jacket!
Give me the jacket!
715
00:51:00,988 --> 00:51:03,923
- And your pants.
- My pants?
716
00:51:03,991 --> 00:51:07,324
Your pants! Yeah, for her,
you know, her "placentia"...
717
00:51:07,394 --> 00:51:10,386
you know,
and her labia and cervical...
718
00:51:10,464 --> 00:51:13,661
Mucus gushing... It's gushing.
719
00:51:13,734 --> 00:51:17,261
It's just a hole and...
720
00:51:17,338 --> 00:51:19,704
Quick! The pants.
And the hat.
721
00:51:19,773 --> 00:51:21,502
Why? Why my hat?
722
00:51:23,611 --> 00:51:25,044
For her...
723
00:51:26,780 --> 00:51:28,042
vagina.
724
00:51:31,418 --> 00:51:33,511
Let's go, ladies.
All aboard. We're on our way.
725
00:51:33,587 --> 00:51:38,115
- What happened to Marty?
- His wife's having a baby.
726
00:51:38,191 --> 00:51:41,922
- A baby?
- I'm Owen, your new driver. Let's go.
727
00:51:42,829 --> 00:51:44,421
Quiet. Quiet, everybody.
728
00:51:44,498 --> 00:51:46,432
Simmer down. Hey!
729
00:51:47,167 --> 00:51:50,466
We're gonna be under way
in just a minute. This is Owen.
730
00:51:50,537 --> 00:51:53,370
He's our new driver.
731
00:51:53,440 --> 00:51:55,908
Everyone say hello.
732
00:51:55,976 --> 00:51:59,878
Hello, Owen!
733
00:51:59,946 --> 00:52:02,506
Our next stop is
the third annual...
734
00:52:02,582 --> 00:52:06,609
I Love Lucy convention
in Santa Fe, New Mexico.
735
00:52:06,686 --> 00:52:10,452
- What do ya say?
- Ba-ba-loo!
736
00:52:24,671 --> 00:52:26,969
Ohh! Ohh!
737
00:52:43,924 --> 00:52:46,984
- Is he dead?
- Hey, mister, are you dead?
738
00:52:49,429 --> 00:52:52,489
It's a race.
It's a race. It's a race.
739
00:52:53,567 --> 00:52:56,968
Run, run,
like greased lightning.
740
00:52:57,771 --> 00:53:00,604
Taxi! Taxi! Taxi!
741
00:53:06,446 --> 00:53:08,710
Not good. Not good.
742
00:53:15,121 --> 00:53:17,715
Don't move! Stay there.
I saw the whole thing.
743
00:53:17,791 --> 00:53:19,053
I'll be right down.
744
00:53:19,125 --> 00:53:22,822
Shit! Gloria Allred.
745
00:53:22,896 --> 00:53:26,229
Hey, buddy?
Buddy, you okay? You okay?
746
00:53:26,299 --> 00:53:28,665
You're fine! You look great.
747
00:53:28,735 --> 00:53:30,726
- You want to report this?
- Taxi!
748
00:53:30,804 --> 00:53:32,772
You don't need a taxi.
Come on!
749
00:53:32,839 --> 00:53:34,830
Where you goin'?
Maybe I can drop you off.
750
00:53:34,908 --> 00:53:37,638
Silver City, New Mexico.
I am in a race.
751
00:53:37,711 --> 00:53:40,305
Silver City?
This is your lucky day!
752
00:53:40,380 --> 00:53:43,349
I'm going to El Paso.
It's right on the way.
753
00:53:43,416 --> 00:53:47,250
Come on. But, look, I got
to be there by 7:00 tonight.
754
00:53:47,320 --> 00:53:50,346
- So I'm going to be driving fast.
- Great.
755
00:53:50,423 --> 00:53:51,355
Yeah!
756
00:53:52,792 --> 00:53:56,592
You just want one copy, 'cause
you get an extra one for half price?
757
00:53:56,663 --> 00:53:58,995
Just one and hurry.
758
00:53:59,065 --> 00:54:00,999
This is the best idea
you ever had.
759
00:54:01,067 --> 00:54:03,592
We split up. We take two keys.
We double our chances of winning.
760
00:54:03,670 --> 00:54:04,830
It can't fail.
761
00:54:04,904 --> 00:54:08,362
- You remember where we're goin'?
- Silver City, New Mexico.
762
00:54:08,441 --> 00:54:11,103
Right. Train station, locker 001.
763
00:54:11,177 --> 00:54:13,168
"Ero, ero," one.
764
00:54:13,246 --> 00:54:15,806
Rule number one: Discretion.
Don't talk to anybody.
765
00:54:15,882 --> 00:54:17,907
- I won't. I "romise."
- I'm serious.
766
00:54:17,984 --> 00:54:20,714
We're talking about
$2 million in cash.
767
00:54:20,787 --> 00:54:24,120
People would just kill us
to get their hands on that key.
768
00:54:24,190 --> 00:54:27,250
I love you.
769
00:54:28,228 --> 00:54:30,162
All right, little brother,
you steal a car.
770
00:54:30,230 --> 00:54:32,596
I'm gonna try to steal
that Corvette right there.
771
00:54:32,666 --> 00:54:34,600
I don't care what you get
as long as it's fast.
772
00:54:34,668 --> 00:54:37,899
I'll meet you in Silver City.
Don't forget your key.
773
00:54:39,706 --> 00:54:43,039
That "other-ucking" bastard!
774
00:54:43,109 --> 00:54:46,101
I'll kill 'im! I'm gonna...
775
00:54:49,683 --> 00:54:51,116
There he is!
776
00:54:52,352 --> 00:54:55,116
Go! Go!
777
00:54:56,189 --> 00:54:58,749
Okay, we're at 2.4 miles.
778
00:54:58,825 --> 00:55:00,315
There's the yellow sign
with the graffiti.
779
00:55:00,393 --> 00:55:02,088
- Turn right.
- I see it.
780
00:55:02,162 --> 00:55:03,561
- Do you see it?
- I see it.
781
00:55:03,630 --> 00:55:06,656
I just love this.
This is like a treasure hunt.
782
00:55:09,202 --> 00:55:11,670
- Slow down!
- I can't!
783
00:55:16,142 --> 00:55:18,235
Help!
784
00:55:47,574 --> 00:55:51,943
I guess my favorite episode, if I
had to pick one, would be episode 34.
785
00:55:52,011 --> 00:55:55,276
Ladies, Lucys, Lucys,
stay behind the line, please.
786
00:55:55,348 --> 00:55:58,579
Remember that one when Ricky
wouldn't take his hat off?
787
00:55:58,651 --> 00:56:02,018
I don't remember that one.
It sounds like a masterpiece.
788
00:56:02,088 --> 00:56:04,886
How about the one where
she got caught in the freezer?
789
00:56:04,958 --> 00:56:09,019
Ma'am? Lucy! You have
to put that out, please.
790
00:56:18,605 --> 00:56:20,573
Lucy, your hair!
791
00:56:20,640 --> 00:56:24,940
Thank you. I couldn't decide whether
to keep it up or try something new.
792
00:56:25,011 --> 00:56:27,502
It's on fire!
793
00:56:35,355 --> 00:56:37,983
- Stop the bus!
- We're not stoppin'!
794
00:56:38,057 --> 00:56:40,685
Just put it out!
Just put it out!
795
00:56:40,760 --> 00:56:43,354
Stop!
796
00:56:43,963 --> 00:56:45,157
The bathroom!
797
00:57:14,694 --> 00:57:19,290
Two million dollars. Two million
dollars. Two million dollars.
798
00:57:19,365 --> 00:57:23,927
Two million dollars. Two million
dollars. Two million dollars.
799
00:57:24,003 --> 00:57:26,699
The Donald Sinclair,
the billionaire?
800
00:57:26,773 --> 00:57:29,970
It sounds crazy, I know,
but I think it's on the level.
801
00:57:30,043 --> 00:57:32,978
Here's the thing. We have
to decide yes or no right now.
802
00:57:33,046 --> 00:57:37,710
If everybody else had to drive,
we have a three-hour head start.
803
00:57:37,784 --> 00:57:41,618
- So you're proposing?
- A corporation... Faucet and Schaffer.
804
00:57:41,688 --> 00:57:45,624
If we win, we split everything
50-50. You can even hold the key.
805
00:57:46,960 --> 00:57:48,621
What do ya think?
806
00:57:49,829 --> 00:57:52,354
I don't know what to think.
I'm in shock.
807
00:57:52,432 --> 00:57:57,734
Three hours ago I was in the airport.
I had a job. I was reading a book.
808
00:57:57,804 --> 00:58:00,295
My grandfather used to say,
"Good things take time.
809
00:58:00,373 --> 00:58:02,967
Great things
happen all at once."
810
00:58:08,748 --> 00:58:13,378
- Jason, where'd you get that?
- I found it under the seat.
811
00:58:13,453 --> 00:58:17,651
- Give it to me. You can't play that.
- Why not?
812
00:58:17,724 --> 00:58:20,955
Because it's Hitler's harmonica.
You can't play Hitler's harmonica.
813
00:58:21,027 --> 00:58:25,430
- You're driving his car.
- I'm not touching it with my mouth.
814
00:58:25,498 --> 00:58:29,195
I'm not sucking on the dashboard.
I'm not gettin' his germs.
815
00:58:29,269 --> 00:58:31,294
Dad, look what I found.
816
00:58:31,371 --> 00:58:36,172
- Where'd you get those?
- The floor. Look, I'm Mrs. Hitler.
817
00:58:36,242 --> 00:58:38,301
All right, take those
off right now.
818
00:58:38,378 --> 00:58:41,313
Hey, look at this.
A lipstick. It's dark.
819
00:58:41,381 --> 00:58:43,372
That Eva Braun had style,
didn't she?
820
00:58:43,449 --> 00:58:46,179
- She was Hitler's girlfriend.
- Give us a kiss.
821
00:58:46,252 --> 00:58:49,187
Bev, it's not funny.
Give me that.
822
00:58:49,255 --> 00:58:51,348
- Honey!
- I got it all over my hand.
823
00:58:51,424 --> 00:58:52,391
Oh...
824
00:58:52,458 --> 00:58:53,789
Randy.
825
00:58:59,799 --> 00:59:02,063
- Chain, chain, chain
- R-E-S-P-E-C-T
826
00:59:02,135 --> 00:59:04,535
- Chain, chain, chain
- Find out what it means to me
827
00:59:04,604 --> 00:59:07,198
Respect
Just a little bit
828
00:59:07,273 --> 00:59:09,537
- Just a little bit
- Chain, chain, chain...
829
00:59:09,609 --> 00:59:11,042
Just...
830
00:59:12,979 --> 00:59:16,142
Look at us go.
We are zooming.
831
00:59:16,215 --> 00:59:18,410
I told you.
We're haulin' ass.
832
00:59:18,484 --> 00:59:22,318
We're haulin' ass.
All righty.
833
00:59:25,792 --> 00:59:29,455
- Guess what I got back there.
- You just told me.
834
00:59:29,529 --> 00:59:31,827
Ass. We're haulin' ass.
835
00:59:31,898 --> 00:59:34,526
No, no, no.
That's just an expression.
836
00:59:38,404 --> 00:59:39,666
It's a heart.
837
00:59:40,973 --> 00:59:44,773
- A heart?
- A human heart.
838
00:59:45,778 --> 00:59:48,941
Some lucky bastard
in El Paso's waiting for it.
839
00:59:49,649 --> 00:59:54,450
Normally, they put it on a plane,
but the airport's all closed down.
840
00:59:58,791 --> 01:00:02,192
- You wanna see it?
- See what?
841
01:00:11,604 --> 01:00:13,572
Are we allowed?
842
01:00:13,639 --> 01:00:17,302
Just take a peek. One peek.
What could happen?
843
01:00:19,145 --> 01:00:22,080
It's a heart.
It needs fresh air.
844
01:00:22,148 --> 01:00:25,117
It's been locked up
in that cooler for seven hours.
845
01:01:01,053 --> 01:01:03,851
- Oopsy-daisy. I get it. I get it.
- Shit! Oh, please!
846
01:01:03,923 --> 01:01:06,414
- Don't step on it!
- I think I found it.
847
01:01:06,492 --> 01:01:08,426
No, that's a caramel apple.
848
01:01:20,907 --> 01:01:23,273
This is wrong.
This is so wrong.
849
01:01:23,342 --> 01:01:26,334
God is gonna smote us.
We're gonna get smote.
850
01:01:26,412 --> 01:01:29,142
Come on. We're siphoning gas.
It's not a smoting offense.
851
01:01:29,215 --> 01:01:31,149
What?
852
01:01:37,690 --> 01:01:39,681
Shouldn't be
turning me on, should it?
853
01:01:44,163 --> 01:01:45,824
- Hey!
- Hi.
854
01:01:45,898 --> 01:01:49,732
- What are you doing?
- Seventeen cups of coffee.
855
01:01:54,373 --> 01:01:56,466
I guess...
856
01:01:56,542 --> 01:01:58,476
I guess that's it.
857
01:02:00,513 --> 01:02:03,846
I guess not.
How do you turn this thing off?
858
01:02:04,450 --> 01:02:06,077
Son of a bitch!
859
01:02:13,593 --> 01:02:17,689
- Man! Damn it!
- Keep going. Go! Go!
860
01:02:20,266 --> 01:02:22,200
He's stopping.
861
01:02:22,268 --> 01:02:24,259
'Cause he knows,
don't mess with us.
862
01:02:44,257 --> 01:02:46,191
We gotta wait.
There's too much wind.
863
01:02:46,259 --> 01:02:50,855
- Guys, I need this balloon.
- Hey, what are you doing?
864
01:02:50,930 --> 01:02:52,864
Hey, man, what...
865
01:02:57,470 --> 01:02:59,563
- Hey, hey!
- I know what I'm doing!
866
01:03:04,010 --> 01:03:07,468
I'm coming to get you!
Get back here!
867
01:03:12,118 --> 01:03:16,054
I'll get him. I'm gonna get you,
stupid hardware guy!
868
01:03:21,060 --> 01:03:26,726
- Go! Go!
- Stand up. Grab the rope.
869
01:03:26,799 --> 01:03:30,291
I'm gonna get you!
Stand up. Ready? Grab it.
870
01:03:32,405 --> 01:03:34,339
Missed it.
871
01:03:34,407 --> 01:03:38,673
- Duane! Duane, stop the car!
- Hang on, buddy.
872
01:03:38,744 --> 01:03:40,769
Duane, please stop.
873
01:03:43,516 --> 01:03:46,679
I got it! I got it!
Just hang on.
874
01:03:54,493 --> 01:03:58,793
- Stop it! Blaine!
- My God! You're gonna kill me!
875
01:03:59,899 --> 01:04:01,833
The cows!
876
01:04:05,671 --> 01:04:07,002
Move!
877
01:04:11,344 --> 01:04:12,777
Watch out!
878
01:04:33,265 --> 01:04:34,391
Shit.
879
01:04:46,779 --> 01:04:48,906
Oh, God!
880
01:04:57,657 --> 01:05:00,558
Help!
881
01:05:05,131 --> 01:05:07,122
- Give me my key.
- What are you talking about?
882
01:05:07,199 --> 01:05:09,258
Give me back my key.
The key!
883
01:05:11,604 --> 01:05:13,697
Give me the key.
884
01:06:01,487 --> 01:06:05,321
Blaine! Blaine!
It's me.
885
01:06:16,502 --> 01:06:18,436
I got the key.
886
01:06:25,144 --> 01:06:26,736
How's it going, Captain?
887
01:06:26,812 --> 01:06:28,746
So far, so good.
888
01:06:28,814 --> 01:06:32,978
- How about a pit stop?
- Sorry. This is a one-way flight.
889
01:06:33,052 --> 01:06:34,986
There's a bathroom
in the back.
890
01:06:35,054 --> 01:06:38,080
The latch is broken.
Anybody could just come in.
891
01:06:38,157 --> 01:06:43,896
So what? You ain't got nothing
the other Lucys haven't seen already.
892
01:06:44,029 --> 01:06:44,961
Not necessarily.
893
01:06:45,230 --> 01:06:47,255
Please, would you
stop screaming?
894
01:06:48,100 --> 01:06:49,158
Damn!
895
01:06:53,071 --> 01:06:54,504
Help me!
896
01:06:54,573 --> 01:06:57,133
For God's sake, help me!
897
01:07:09,988 --> 01:07:12,183
Oh, shit.
898
01:07:17,863 --> 01:07:21,060
Owen!
Owen, what are you doing?
899
01:07:21,133 --> 01:07:23,067
It's a flat tire.
Please, stay on the bus.
900
01:07:23,135 --> 01:07:26,662
- Well, you're turning it the wrong way.
- I know what I'm doing.
901
01:07:26,738 --> 01:07:30,504
- Please, get on the bus. Wait!
- Maybe we should check the oil.
902
01:07:30,575 --> 01:07:34,534
I think you're supposed to change
the air in the tires every 12,000 miles.
903
01:07:34,613 --> 01:07:37,275
- I can fix it.
- Give me that!
904
01:07:38,917 --> 01:07:41,078
Wait! That's the spare!
905
01:07:50,162 --> 01:07:51,686
We'll still catch it.
906
01:08:17,723 --> 01:08:20,385
Turn it around.
Just turn it around.
907
01:08:20,459 --> 01:08:24,020
Please be careful.
Wait, wait, wait. What is that?
908
01:08:26,264 --> 01:08:29,358
- It's a nickel.
- Would you please put it in the bag?
909
01:08:46,952 --> 01:08:51,252
Why don't you check over there?
Maybe it bounced.
910
01:08:53,692 --> 01:08:57,856
- I'm a dead man.
- Don't worry. We will find the heart.
911
01:08:57,929 --> 01:09:01,990
I have lost my heart
many times before.
912
01:09:05,704 --> 01:09:07,638
I make a joke...
913
01:09:07,706 --> 01:09:11,733
to help you forget
how screwed you are.
914
01:09:11,810 --> 01:09:16,645
I don't think it got this far.
Let's check down by the road.
915
01:09:16,715 --> 01:09:18,842
Oh, hello. A doggy.
916
01:09:18,917 --> 01:09:21,249
Hello. Hello. Hello there.
917
01:09:21,319 --> 01:09:23,583
Isn't he a good doggy?
918
01:09:23,655 --> 01:09:26,249
Come on. Come on.
Fetch. Fetch it.
919
01:09:28,026 --> 01:09:30,995
Look at him go.
920
01:09:32,831 --> 01:09:35,493
- Here, boy!
- Doggy!
921
01:09:35,567 --> 01:09:37,000
Good boy!
922
01:09:41,973 --> 01:09:43,600
- It really is a beautiful car.
- Yeah.
923
01:09:43,675 --> 01:09:45,870
- Look at this mahogany.
- Gorgeous.
924
01:09:45,944 --> 01:09:49,038
You just don't see
that anymore, you know?
925
01:09:49,114 --> 01:09:52,208
- I wonder what this is.
- Careful. That's a cigarette lighter.
926
01:09:52,284 --> 01:09:54,218
- No, I don't think they had those then.
- Yes, they did.
927
01:09:55,020 --> 01:09:57,113
Oh, honey!
Did you burn yourself?
928
01:09:57,189 --> 01:09:59,316
- Yeah. Oh, God!
- Oh, I told you.
929
01:10:02,794 --> 01:10:04,785
Sorry.
930
01:10:04,863 --> 01:10:07,354
My husband,
he burned his finger, ma'am.
931
01:10:07,432 --> 01:10:11,163
- He was pulling, then he was waving...
- Bev, Bev, not helping.
932
01:10:12,370 --> 01:10:14,304
- Hi.
- Hi.
933
01:10:16,942 --> 01:10:20,070
I really like
your dike. Bike.
934
01:10:22,314 --> 01:10:23,246
It's nice.
935
01:10:28,386 --> 01:10:31,355
Cut 'em off!
Get in front!
936
01:10:32,124 --> 01:10:34,752
- Hey! What are you, nuts?
- Get down!
937
01:10:34,826 --> 01:10:36,919
Kids, stay down!
This thing won't go any faster!
938
01:10:36,995 --> 01:10:39,395
Stop it! The headlights!
The headlight!
939
01:10:39,464 --> 01:10:44,094
- Oh, my God!
- Are you insane? This is Hitler's car!
940
01:11:02,287 --> 01:11:05,586
Honey, go ask them for help.
Tell them everything that happened.
941
01:11:05,657 --> 01:11:08,057
And ask them
to call the police.
942
01:11:08,126 --> 01:11:10,060
And a tow truck.
943
01:11:54,339 --> 01:11:56,569
- Hello.
- Hello.
944
01:11:56,641 --> 01:11:59,132
- Are you Harold?
- Yes.
945
01:11:59,211 --> 01:12:01,679
I'm Vicky.
946
01:12:02,714 --> 01:12:04,739
Are you gonna
invite me in, Harry?
947
01:12:04,816 --> 01:12:06,909
Or would you rather
party out here in the hallway?
948
01:12:07,852 --> 01:12:09,012
Please. Come in.
949
01:12:13,191 --> 01:12:15,125
Not too shabby.
950
01:12:16,294 --> 01:12:18,990
- Where are you from, Harry?
- From here.
951
01:12:19,064 --> 01:12:22,659
- Las Vegas.
- A local boy makes good.
952
01:12:24,703 --> 01:12:28,503
So, Harry,
what can I do for you?
953
01:12:29,574 --> 01:12:31,804
Okay. Here's what I want.
954
01:12:33,044 --> 01:12:34,602
First we both get naked.
955
01:12:34,679 --> 01:12:39,116
- So far, so good.
- Only we're wearing sailor hats.
956
01:12:40,352 --> 01:12:41,376
And then...
957
01:12:42,454 --> 01:12:45,548
we get into a Jacuzzi...
958
01:12:45,624 --> 01:12:47,888
filled with Pepto-Bismol.
959
01:12:48,693 --> 01:12:49,625
And...
960
01:12:50,695 --> 01:12:53,129
I clip your toenails...
961
01:12:53,198 --> 01:12:55,393
and you shave my buttocks.
962
01:12:56,801 --> 01:12:58,735
Pardon me?
963
01:12:58,803 --> 01:13:02,705
Okay, naked,
Jacuzzi, Pepto-Bismol...
964
01:13:02,774 --> 01:13:05,743
toenails,
shave my buttocks.
965
01:13:05,810 --> 01:13:07,437
How much would that cost?
966
01:13:07,512 --> 01:13:11,004
Geez, honey,
you have quite an imagination.
967
01:13:11,950 --> 01:13:13,349
How much would it cost?
968
01:13:15,520 --> 01:13:18,011
Well, let's see.
969
01:13:18,089 --> 01:13:21,547
A party like that...
970
01:13:21,626 --> 01:13:23,560
three thousand dollars.
971
01:13:23,628 --> 01:13:27,325
Okay, 3,000.
Who has 3,000?
972
01:13:27,399 --> 01:13:29,424
Carlton had 2,800.
He's the closest.
973
01:13:49,988 --> 01:13:52,980
I think it's okay.
What do you think?
974
01:13:53,058 --> 01:13:56,357
What about those little holes?
975
01:13:56,428 --> 01:13:59,261
Are they bite marks?
976
01:13:59,331 --> 01:14:03,335
That's... That's how it was.
I'm... I'm pretty sure.
977
01:14:03,468 --> 01:14:05,299
What am I doing?
978
01:14:05,370 --> 01:14:07,804
I can't go
to El Paso with this.
979
01:14:07,872 --> 01:14:11,000
Look at it.
It's gonna leak like a sieve.
980
01:14:11,076 --> 01:14:14,011
The guy's gonna be alive
for like two minutes and then...
981
01:14:21,086 --> 01:14:24,419
- A drifter.
- A drifter?
982
01:14:25,357 --> 01:14:28,451
We... We find a drifter...
983
01:14:28,526 --> 01:14:30,494
kill him,
cut out his heart.
984
01:14:30,562 --> 01:14:33,292
Nobody's gonna miss him, right?
I mean, he's a drifter.
985
01:14:33,365 --> 01:14:35,424
He's an invisible man.
It's a perfect plan.
986
01:14:35,500 --> 01:14:38,435
Mr. Zack, now you are
giving me the freak-out.
987
01:14:40,038 --> 01:14:42,529
Where...
Where do I find a drifter?
988
01:14:48,580 --> 01:14:49,842
Enrico.
989
01:14:51,249 --> 01:14:54,946
- Where did you say you were from?
- Me? I am from Napoli.
990
01:14:56,354 --> 01:14:59,619
And your family,
they're back there?
991
01:14:59,691 --> 01:15:03,457
No. No, my papa, he is dead.
992
01:15:03,528 --> 01:15:08,431
And my mama. All gone.
993
01:15:08,500 --> 01:15:11,162
Any family? Kids?
994
01:15:13,838 --> 01:15:17,899
I am completely alone.
995
01:15:17,976 --> 01:15:20,342
Why...
996
01:15:20,412 --> 01:15:23,210
Why do you...
997
01:15:25,950 --> 01:15:28,783
Look, a drifter.
Let's kill him.
998
01:15:28,853 --> 01:15:30,787
Son of a...
Come back here!
999
01:15:53,244 --> 01:15:56,543
Whatever. Listen, sugar.
You're not going anywhere today.
1000
01:15:56,614 --> 01:15:58,241
You got a crack
in your radiator.
1001
01:15:58,316 --> 01:16:00,910
That's this big tank
in front of this big engine.
1002
01:16:00,985 --> 01:16:04,011
- I know what a radiator is.
- Is there a place we can rent a car?
1003
01:16:04,088 --> 01:16:06,386
- Albuquerque.
- Okay, look.
1004
01:16:06,457 --> 01:16:08,425
We'll just have to patch it.
A quick fix.
1005
01:16:08,493 --> 01:16:12,395
- Patch it? Patch it with what?
- Sand and tire sealant.
1006
01:16:12,463 --> 01:16:16,160
You mix the two. It forms an
adhesive, lasting a couple of hours.
1007
01:16:16,234 --> 01:16:18,168
We only have about
30 miles to go?
1008
01:16:18,236 --> 01:16:21,171
Darlin',
we don't have any sand.
1009
01:16:21,239 --> 01:16:24,606
Hello!
We're in the desert!
1010
01:16:30,581 --> 01:16:32,674
We should've
bought a squirrel.
1011
01:16:39,991 --> 01:16:44,189
Mother of mercy!
Where'd you come from? Car trouble?
1012
01:16:44,262 --> 01:16:48,198
Here. Sit down.
You two look exhausted.
1013
01:16:48,266 --> 01:16:51,201
How long y'all been out there?
Here. Have something to drink.
1014
01:16:51,269 --> 01:16:53,794
Ladies and gentlemen,
members of the press...
1015
01:16:53,871 --> 01:16:58,069
- What's going on?
- Some rocket scientists from L. A...
1016
01:16:58,142 --> 01:17:00,667
they're trying to break
the land speed record.
1017
01:17:03,614 --> 01:17:07,311
A unique combination of automotive
and aerodynamic innovation.
1018
01:17:07,385 --> 01:17:09,649
The vehicle, which
we call Lightning II...
1019
01:17:09,720 --> 01:17:11,449
represents three years
of R & D...
1020
01:17:11,522 --> 01:17:14,889
which was conducted at the
California Institute of Technology.
1021
01:17:14,959 --> 01:17:19,919
The design team was led by Professor
Ken Freedman and Dr. Richard Kramer.
1022
01:17:19,997 --> 01:17:22,465
We believe
that, aerodynamically...
1023
01:17:22,533 --> 01:17:25,229
this is the most perfect
vehicle ever designed.
1024
01:17:25,303 --> 01:17:29,103
The entire vehicle weighs
less than 1,850 pounds.
1025
01:17:29,173 --> 01:17:31,903
The body is a one-piece
Kevlar composite.
1026
01:17:31,976 --> 01:17:34,103
The wheels are
solid billet aluminum...
1027
01:17:34,178 --> 01:17:37,841
and she's powered by twin
JE-79 turbo jet engines...
1028
01:17:37,915 --> 01:17:40,577
the same engines that are
in the F-4 Phantom jet.
1029
01:17:40,651 --> 01:17:42,585
Are there any questions?
1030
01:17:42,653 --> 01:17:45,087
Mr. Calvert, what is
the current land speed record?
1031
01:17:45,156 --> 01:17:47,181
That would be
742 miles per hour...
1032
01:17:47,258 --> 01:17:49,783
but we hope to have
a new record today.
1033
01:17:49,860 --> 01:17:53,318
- Anyone else?
- How do you start it?
1034
01:17:53,397 --> 01:17:55,490
Good question.
1035
01:17:55,566 --> 01:17:57,864
A green lever to the left of the
steering wheel in the cockpit...
1036
01:17:57,935 --> 01:18:01,029
engages the primary thruster,
igniting the JE...
1037
01:18:14,452 --> 01:18:16,386
740, 745...
1038
01:18:16,454 --> 01:18:18,479
- That's a record.
- They'll break the sound barrier.
1039
01:18:21,993 --> 01:18:25,326
Well, that's it. I still don't
think she's gonna hold.
1040
01:18:25,396 --> 01:18:28,524
- What do we owe you?
- Five hundred bucks.
1041
01:18:28,599 --> 01:18:31,966
- What?
- For two quarts of sealant?
1042
01:18:32,036 --> 01:18:35,062
No way.
That's 20 bucks tops.
1043
01:18:35,139 --> 01:18:37,972
Okay, here's 40 dollars.
That's double what it's worth, okay?
1044
01:18:38,042 --> 01:18:39,976
Come on, Nick. Let's go.
1045
01:18:41,545 --> 01:18:42,637
Hold it.
1046
01:18:44,982 --> 01:18:47,644
Another little tool
no mechanic should be without.
1047
01:18:49,220 --> 01:18:53,350
Fine. Here's your $500.
But you know what, Billy Ray?
1048
01:18:53,424 --> 01:18:55,358
What goes around,
comes around.
1049
01:18:55,426 --> 01:18:57,360
This is so unchristian.
1050
01:18:57,428 --> 01:18:59,191
Unchristian?
1051
01:19:00,298 --> 01:19:03,734
Well, if the good Lord don't
like the way I conduct business...
1052
01:19:03,801 --> 01:19:05,462
let him say something.
1053
01:19:05,536 --> 01:19:07,731
Let him give me a sign.
1054
01:19:07,805 --> 01:19:11,741
Oh, Lord, I'm here
and I'm listening!
1055
01:19:11,809 --> 01:19:13,834
Hello!
1056
01:19:18,983 --> 01:19:22,919
- Mach one!
- We did it! We did it!
1057
01:19:29,093 --> 01:19:32,028
Hey, everybody okay?
You all right? Yeah?
1058
01:19:32,096 --> 01:19:35,691
- Randy, you okay?
- There's no Ink Inc.
1059
01:19:35,766 --> 01:19:38,758
- What?
- There's no job.
1060
01:19:40,438 --> 01:19:42,702
It's a race. We're racing.
1061
01:19:42,773 --> 01:19:44,968
Donald Sinclair put
$2 million in a locker.
1062
01:19:45,042 --> 01:19:47,237
And I wanna get there first.
1063
01:19:47,311 --> 01:19:52,248
I do not want
to work at Home Depot!
1064
01:20:23,214 --> 01:20:25,478
Okay, people,
back on the bus.
1065
01:20:25,549 --> 01:20:27,676
George, don't eat that.
1066
01:20:27,752 --> 01:20:31,188
Get back on the bus!
Come on. Back on the bus.
1067
01:20:31,255 --> 01:20:33,189
Simon, put that down.
1068
01:20:33,257 --> 01:20:36,954
You too. Back on the bus.
Come on, everyone!
1069
01:20:37,027 --> 01:20:40,394
We don't wanna miss dinner.
It's macaroni night!
1070
01:20:43,934 --> 01:20:45,333
We came in
the rocket car.
1071
01:20:45,403 --> 01:20:49,863
Oh, a rocket car. Let's hear
all about that on the bus.
1072
01:20:49,940 --> 01:20:51,965
All right,
so we can still win...
1073
01:20:52,042 --> 01:20:55,034
but we have
to leave now, all right?
1074
01:20:55,112 --> 01:20:57,706
- So, come on.
- Dad.
1075
01:20:57,782 --> 01:20:59,977
It's been a living hell.
1076
01:21:00,050 --> 01:21:03,816
Bev, it's... it's $2 million.
1077
01:21:03,888 --> 01:21:07,119
That's a lifetime supply
of hummus.
1078
01:21:14,765 --> 01:21:17,700
Okay. Okay. Yeah.
1079
01:21:17,768 --> 01:21:20,669
I've been selfish.
I understand.
1080
01:21:20,738 --> 01:21:24,037
I'm sorry. Really.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
1081
01:21:24,108 --> 01:21:28,306
I'm sorry.
I almost got us killed.
1082
01:21:32,883 --> 01:21:34,874
God!
1083
01:21:43,060 --> 01:21:46,655
- Hi, everybody. Miss me?
- Hey!
1084
01:21:46,730 --> 01:21:50,325
To show there's no hard feelings,
chocolate shakes all around.
1085
01:21:50,401 --> 01:21:53,370
- Are you okay?
- Yeah, I'm fine.
1086
01:21:53,437 --> 01:21:56,497
I'm a little disappointed,
but I'm an adult.
1087
01:21:56,574 --> 01:21:59,134
So drink these up, and then
we'll return the Nazi-mobile.
1088
01:21:59,210 --> 01:22:02,873
We'll get that van fixed, go back
to Vegas and see David Copperfield!
1089
01:22:02,947 --> 01:22:06,940
Yea! Okay,
drink up, buddy!
1090
01:22:07,017 --> 01:22:08,746
Is it good?
1091
01:22:08,819 --> 01:22:10,753
Drink it up, honey.
1092
01:22:14,291 --> 01:22:16,851
Oh, don't feel bad.
1093
01:22:16,927 --> 01:22:19,452
- It's not your fault.
- We'll tell the company.
1094
01:22:19,530 --> 01:22:21,930
We won't let them
fire you.
1095
01:22:21,999 --> 01:22:24,467
- I'm no bus driver.
- Don't say that.
1096
01:22:24,535 --> 01:22:27,732
No. I'm not.
I'm not a bus driver.
1097
01:22:27,805 --> 01:22:30,603
Oh, you mustn't be
so hard on yourself.
1098
01:22:30,674 --> 01:22:34,041
Hey, everybody, who's
the world's greatest bus driver?
1099
01:22:41,218 --> 01:22:42,446
Listen. Listen. No, no!
1100
01:22:42,520 --> 01:22:46,616
No! No! Shut up, you crazy
Lucy bitches! Shut up!
1101
01:22:48,893 --> 01:22:51,657
I am not a bus driver!
1102
01:22:51,729 --> 01:22:55,825
I do not work for
the bus company! All right?
1103
01:22:55,900 --> 01:23:00,496
I needed a ride to New Mexico,
so I stole this uniform!
1104
01:23:00,571 --> 01:23:04,439
See this jacket?
This is not my jacket!
1105
01:23:04,508 --> 01:23:06,476
Remember Marty,
the bus driver?
1106
01:23:07,344 --> 01:23:10,711
This is his shirt!
I stole it!
1107
01:23:10,781 --> 01:23:13,181
And these pants, you think
I'd wear these pants?
1108
01:23:13,250 --> 01:23:15,684
These aren't my pants!
1109
01:23:15,753 --> 01:23:18,449
These are Marty's pants.
I stole them.
1110
01:23:21,559 --> 01:23:25,017
I am not a bus driver.
1111
01:23:27,598 --> 01:23:30,499
You're not
a real bus driver?
1112
01:23:30,568 --> 01:23:32,866
You lied to us!
1113
01:23:32,937 --> 01:23:35,462
He ruined
our whole vacation!
1114
01:23:45,583 --> 01:23:49,417
Here they come.
They're all within 50 miles.
1115
01:23:49,486 --> 01:23:52,148
It's the final lap.
Mr. Grisham.
1116
01:23:52,222 --> 01:23:55,350
Now, the airport's back on-line, so
I want you to take the Lear jet...
1117
01:23:55,426 --> 01:23:58,657
scoot on down to Silver City
and report from the finish line.
1118
01:23:58,729 --> 01:24:01,527
Yes, sir.
1119
01:24:01,599 --> 01:24:02,799
Yes!
1120
01:24:25,288 --> 01:24:27,222
Let's go back to Vegas.
1121
01:24:29,225 --> 01:24:32,217
Bev, Bev, wake...
Come on. Wake up. Wake up.
1122
01:24:32,295 --> 01:24:35,230
Bev, wake up. Wake up.
Third Reich's here. Come on.
1123
01:24:35,298 --> 01:24:37,232
Get down. You wanna
have a nice life.
1124
01:24:37,300 --> 01:24:40,736
Okay, okay. Think. Think.
SS in the parking lot.
1125
01:24:40,803 --> 01:24:42,737
Not good. Not good. Think.
1126
01:24:46,375 --> 01:24:47,433
Hi, honey.
1127
01:24:48,511 --> 01:24:50,445
- They gonna be all right?
- Yeah.
1128
01:24:50,513 --> 01:24:54,176
Friend, I don't
think there's room.
1129
01:24:55,818 --> 01:24:57,752
This one's little.
1130
01:24:59,488 --> 01:25:02,685
- There it is. There it is!
- Silver City. We're almost there.
1131
01:25:02,758 --> 01:25:05,090
Yeah! Go!
1132
01:26:33,182 --> 01:26:35,275
Where the fuck are we?
1133
01:27:41,984 --> 01:27:44,282
There were two guys
in there.
1134
01:27:44,353 --> 01:27:46,287
- Where'd they go?
- Hey!
1135
01:27:46,355 --> 01:27:47,947
Thanks for the truck, buddy!
1136
01:28:51,320 --> 01:28:53,515
- Yeah.
- Silver City.
1137
01:28:53,589 --> 01:28:55,682
Next stop, Silver City.
1138
01:28:55,758 --> 01:28:59,250
Silver City?
It is the finish line.
1139
01:28:59,328 --> 01:29:02,559
I made it. I made it!
1140
01:29:04,567 --> 01:29:08,663
The key.
Where is the key?
1141
01:29:12,308 --> 01:29:14,902
What have we... Where is
the key, my little baby?
1142
01:29:14,977 --> 01:29:17,912
- Excuse me.
- I think I am touching it.
1143
01:29:17,980 --> 01:29:21,939
- Get away from him.
- I can feel it. It's very small.
1144
01:29:22,017 --> 01:29:26,420
- I'm calling the conductor!
- I have it! I got it!
1145
01:29:26,489 --> 01:29:29,754
Wait! Wait!
Come back! Don't leave me!
1146
01:29:35,030 --> 01:29:37,624
Come on! Come on, baby!
1147
01:29:39,301 --> 01:29:40,996
Giddyap!
1148
01:29:45,107 --> 01:29:48,975
Come on, baby.
Just one more mile.
1149
01:29:49,044 --> 01:29:51,478
Just one mile.
Come on!
1150
01:29:52,681 --> 01:29:54,615
Randy?
1151
01:29:55,684 --> 01:29:57,845
Hey, honey,
how'd you sleep?
1152
01:30:05,794 --> 01:30:08,991
- Pass. Pass him.
- I can't. We're too big.
1153
01:30:09,064 --> 01:30:13,091
There's Silver City.
We're here. Move!
1154
01:30:15,671 --> 01:30:17,662
They stopped.
1155
01:30:20,576 --> 01:30:22,237
They're moving. Look.
1156
01:30:31,620 --> 01:30:33,554
Come on, Dad! Let's go!
1157
01:30:36,525 --> 01:30:37,583
I can smell it.
1158
01:30:37,660 --> 01:30:41,619
Daisy, Daisy
1159
01:30:41,697 --> 01:30:45,133
Give me your answer true
1160
01:30:45,201 --> 01:30:49,137
Daisy, Daisy
1161
01:30:56,545 --> 01:30:59,571
Hey! Hey!
Stop the bus! Stop the bus!
1162
01:30:59,648 --> 01:31:04,085
- We gotta get off!
- Ladies. You know the rules.
1163
01:31:04,153 --> 01:31:06,314
We're not crazy, lady.
1164
01:31:06,388 --> 01:31:08,288
We should've bought a squirrel.
We didn't buy a squirrel.
1165
01:31:08,357 --> 01:31:10,985
- That's why we took the rocket car.
- We can still win.
1166
01:31:11,060 --> 01:31:14,223
Open the door, or I'm gonna crush
you like a cockroach in the night.
1167
01:31:14,296 --> 01:31:16,787
Open the door!
Tell him! Tell him!
1168
01:31:16,865 --> 01:31:18,799
- Open the door.
- Thank you!
1169
01:31:47,663 --> 01:31:48,960
It's Pollini.
1170
01:31:49,031 --> 01:31:51,261
Enrico Pollini on a train.
1171
01:31:51,333 --> 01:31:55,429
- He just rolled into the station.
- Well, what do you know?
1172
01:31:55,504 --> 01:31:57,495
Rip Van Winkle
pulled it off.
1173
01:31:57,573 --> 01:31:59,632
You gotta love a long shot.
1174
01:32:24,133 --> 01:32:27,125
It's here. It's here.
1175
01:32:27,202 --> 01:32:30,103
- It's here.
- Here he comes.
1176
01:32:30,172 --> 01:32:32,572
- It's you.
- He's holding the key.
1177
01:32:34,643 --> 01:32:36,907
And he's going
to the locker.
1178
01:32:38,547 --> 01:32:42,108
Mr. Pollini, well done, sir.
And congratulations.
1179
01:32:42,184 --> 01:32:45,381
On behalf of Mr. Donald Sinclair,
the Venetian Hotel and Casino...
1180
01:32:51,493 --> 01:32:54,553
Mr. Grisham, is it over?
1181
01:33:01,403 --> 01:33:03,337
- Get out of the way!
- Open it!
1182
01:33:10,779 --> 01:33:12,713
He's sleeping.
1183
01:33:32,801 --> 01:33:34,735
Did I win?
1184
01:33:35,838 --> 01:33:37,931
Vicky.
You let go of this bag...
1185
01:33:38,006 --> 01:33:41,533
or I swear to God, I'll report
you to the escort service.
1186
01:33:41,610 --> 01:33:44,135
Mr. Grisham,
what's going on?
1187
01:33:44,213 --> 01:33:48,047
The hooker... The hooker...
The hooker is taking the money.
1188
01:33:48,117 --> 01:33:51,814
- What hooker?
- Vicky. From the hotel.
1189
01:33:51,887 --> 01:33:55,584
- Pepto-Bismol?
- I told you to wait in the car.
1190
01:33:55,657 --> 01:33:58,251
- What the hell is she doing there?
- I brought her.
1191
01:33:58,327 --> 01:34:01,922
I'm sorry, Mr. Sinclair.
She said she liked me.
1192
01:34:01,997 --> 01:34:05,558
I'm beginning to think she was
only interested in the money!
1193
01:34:10,239 --> 01:34:12,639
- Come with me.
- I'll drive.
1194
01:34:26,889 --> 01:34:30,017
So long, suckers!
1195
01:34:36,331 --> 01:34:39,323
- The bus! The bus.
- You wanna steal a bus?
1196
01:34:39,401 --> 01:34:42,666
- Yes, I do.
- My God, what have I done?
1197
01:34:44,506 --> 01:34:47,100
Help! Somebody help me!
1198
01:34:49,511 --> 01:34:51,445
This thing's got
a mind of its own.
1199
01:34:57,920 --> 01:35:00,388
- Finders keepers, pal.
- That's mine.
1200
01:35:00,456 --> 01:35:02,720
I see it!
I see it! Relax!
1201
01:35:15,637 --> 01:35:17,969
It means it's a scratch.
Nobody wins.
1202
01:35:18,040 --> 01:35:21,806
I'll tell you what it means.
We're going into extra innings.
1203
01:35:21,877 --> 01:35:24,903
Carla, call the airport. Tell them
to get my other Lear ready.
1204
01:35:24,980 --> 01:35:28,006
Gordon, stay here and watch the
board. Tell us where they're going.
1205
01:35:28,083 --> 01:35:32,042
Gentlemen, grab your drinks.
We're going to Silver City.
1206
01:35:42,464 --> 01:35:44,398
- Is that it?
- That's it.
1207
01:35:44,466 --> 01:35:46,696
Thank the pilot.
Tell him to level off.
1208
01:35:48,136 --> 01:35:49,899
Who had Mr. Kimiche?
1209
01:35:49,972 --> 01:35:52,341
- It was me.
- Well done!
1210
01:35:52,474 --> 01:35:55,341
- Congratulations.
- Very good.
1211
01:35:59,281 --> 01:36:00,213
Keep going!
1212
01:36:01,350 --> 01:36:03,341
Come on!
1213
01:36:03,418 --> 01:36:05,943
There it is.
It's coming down right there.
1214
01:36:22,337 --> 01:36:24,396
- Where is it?
- There it is.
1215
01:36:24,473 --> 01:36:26,270
Go!
1216
01:36:29,311 --> 01:36:32,769
- Get it! Get it!
- Grab that money!
1217
01:36:32,848 --> 01:36:34,849
Get it down!
1218
01:36:52,700 --> 01:36:54,998
Now, that is
one hell of an entrance.
1219
01:36:55,069 --> 01:36:56,900
It's Smash Mouth!
1220
01:36:58,005 --> 01:37:00,769
What's going on over here?
1221
01:37:00,841 --> 01:37:02,866
- What's this?
- Money.
1222
01:37:02,943 --> 01:37:05,104
Jesus, how much is this?
1223
01:37:05,179 --> 01:37:07,443
- Two million dollars.
- Two...
1224
01:37:07,514 --> 01:37:11,541
Two million...
Two million dollars, everybody!
1225
01:37:14,021 --> 01:37:16,182
Two million dollars!
1226
01:37:16,257 --> 01:37:19,192
On the bus,
we talked about it...
1227
01:37:19,260 --> 01:37:23,128
and we decide
to share all the money.
1228
01:37:24,131 --> 01:37:26,258
They're gonna share
all the money, everybody!
1229
01:37:27,635 --> 01:37:29,125
Oh, man!
1230
01:37:30,170 --> 01:37:31,831
Get these guys some jackets.
1231
01:37:31,906 --> 01:37:34,340
Get these jack...
Get these jackets over here.
1232
01:37:36,010 --> 01:37:39,207
So what's the story, man? Are you
guys some kind of organization?
1233
01:37:39,280 --> 01:37:43,148
- What's going on?
- No, no. We just met this morning.
1234
01:37:43,217 --> 01:37:46,186
They just met
this morning, everybody!
1235
01:37:46,253 --> 01:37:47,777
Oh, my God!
1236
01:37:47,855 --> 01:37:50,847
I almost didn't come along,
but then I met Tracy and...
1237
01:37:50,925 --> 01:37:52,984
Well, great things
happen all at once.
1238
01:37:53,060 --> 01:37:56,518
Oh, this is beautiful, baby.
This is beautiful.
1239
01:37:56,597 --> 01:37:58,895
Great things happen,
I don't know.
1240
01:38:00,034 --> 01:38:01,968
Feed the earth, baby.
Feed the earth.
1241
01:38:02,036 --> 01:38:06,063
We're gonna check the tote board
now and see where we're at. Okay?
1242
01:38:06,140 --> 01:38:09,632
Come on, baby.
Let it roll. Come on, baby.
1243
01:38:19,286 --> 01:38:20,651
You don't understand.
1244
01:38:25,960 --> 01:38:30,659
Excuse me.
We work for Feed the Earth.
1245
01:38:30,731 --> 01:38:32,562
These are some
of our children.
1246
01:38:37,805 --> 01:38:41,639
I don't know who you people are
or where you came from...
1247
01:38:41,709 --> 01:38:44,940
but God bless you.
1248
01:38:47,147 --> 01:38:48,079
Tonight...
1249
01:38:48,148 --> 01:38:50,708
you've given to these kids...
1250
01:38:50,784 --> 01:38:55,915
and their brothers and sisters
all over the world more than money.
1251
01:38:55,990 --> 01:38:58,754
You've given them back
their faith...
1252
01:38:58,826 --> 01:39:02,227
their faith
in the goodness of people.
1253
01:39:09,803 --> 01:39:15,036
She said, "You are just
like the 12 disciples."
1254
01:39:16,710 --> 01:39:18,302
Aw!
1255
01:39:21,715 --> 01:39:22,875
Aw!
1256
01:39:24,318 --> 01:39:25,979
Thank you.
1257
01:40:13,934 --> 01:40:15,868
Forget it.
1258
01:40:15,936 --> 01:40:18,769
All these other disciples can do
whatever they want with their share.
1259
01:40:18,839 --> 01:40:20,966
- But this money goes home with us.
- What?
1260
01:40:21,041 --> 01:40:24,374
- Period. End of story.
- Put the money in the bag, carrot.
1261
01:40:28,882 --> 01:40:31,874
You don't know me, man.
1262
01:40:31,952 --> 01:40:33,886
Come here.
1263
01:40:36,256 --> 01:40:38,190
It's you.
1264
01:40:40,227 --> 01:40:42,388
I'm so proud of you.
1265
01:40:42,463 --> 01:40:45,489
Giving away
all of your money?
1266
01:40:57,077 --> 01:40:58,476
Come on.
1267
01:41:07,187 --> 01:41:10,418
Mama is watching us
from heaven right now.
1268
01:41:12,926 --> 01:41:14,951
What would she do?
1269
01:41:18,799 --> 01:41:22,496
It's for starving
children, Duane.
1270
01:41:24,738 --> 01:41:26,672
Do it for Mom.
1271
01:41:51,665 --> 01:41:53,792
Excuse me,
ladies and gentlemen.
1272
01:41:53,867 --> 01:41:56,267
I'd like to introduce
the real star of tonight's show.
1273
01:41:56,336 --> 01:42:00,272
None of us would be here tonight
if it wasn't for this man.
1274
01:42:00,340 --> 01:42:03,776
He is the man with the plan,
Mr. Donald Sinclair.
1275
01:42:04,845 --> 01:42:05,777
What?
1276
01:42:05,846 --> 01:42:08,610
One of the wealthiest
men in the world!
1277
01:42:10,150 --> 01:42:13,278
- Mr. Donald Sinclair!
- You are the man.
1278
01:42:13,353 --> 01:42:16,914
Get a camera on him. There you go.
Nice shot. There he is.
1279
01:42:18,325 --> 01:42:21,556
These men, they didn't
have to be here tonight.
1280
01:42:21,628 --> 01:42:24,062
No, they could be off
kicking back in the Riviera...
1281
01:42:24,131 --> 01:42:27,623
or in Vegas blowing their money
on some meaningless idiotic bet.
1282
01:42:29,503 --> 01:42:31,437
They couldn't do that...
1283
01:42:31,505 --> 01:42:33,973
not when there were children
going to bed hungry every night.
1284
01:42:34,041 --> 01:42:36,908
Isn't that right, fellas?
1285
01:42:36,977 --> 01:42:38,911
Whatever.
1286
01:42:38,979 --> 01:42:41,607
Mr. Donald Sinclair
and his partners...
1287
01:42:41,682 --> 01:42:44,879
want you and the millions
of people watching at home...
1288
01:42:44,952 --> 01:42:47,921
to know they plan to match
whatever you raise tonight...
1289
01:42:47,988 --> 01:42:50,013
dollar for dollar!
1290
01:42:50,090 --> 01:42:51,819
- Dollar for dollar!
- Dollar for dollar!
1291
01:42:55,162 --> 01:42:56,823
A matching fund, everybody!
1292
01:42:56,897 --> 01:42:59,331
Let's hit the phones
out there and crank it up...
1293
01:42:59,399 --> 01:43:02,197
because we're gonna feed
the whole world tonight!
1294
01:43:03,570 --> 01:43:06,004
Somebody once told me
1295
01:43:06,073 --> 01:43:08,564
The world is gonna roll me
1296
01:43:08,642 --> 01:43:12,442
I ain't the sharpest
tool in the shed
1297
01:43:12,512 --> 01:43:14,946
And she was lookin'
kind of dumb
1298
01:43:15,015 --> 01:43:17,006
With a finger and a thumb
1299
01:43:17,084 --> 01:43:22,290
In the shape of an "L"
on her forehead
1300
01:43:22,423 --> 01:43:24,789
Well, the years start comin'
and they don't stop comin'
1301
01:43:24,859 --> 01:43:27,123
Fed to the rules and
I hit the ground runnin'
1302
01:43:27,194 --> 01:43:29,162
Didn't make sense
not to live for fun
1303
01:43:29,230 --> 01:43:31,698
Your brain gets smart
but your head gets dumb
1304
01:43:31,766 --> 01:43:33,199
So much to do, so much to see
1305
01:43:33,267 --> 01:43:35,963
So what's wrong with
takin' the back streets
1306
01:43:36,037 --> 01:43:37,902
You'll never know if you don't go
1307
01:43:37,972 --> 01:43:40,133
You'll never shine if you don't glow
1308
01:43:40,207 --> 01:43:42,869
Hey, now, you're an all-star
1309
01:43:42,943 --> 01:43:44,911
Get your game on, go play
1310
01:43:44,979 --> 01:43:49,814
Hey, now, you're a rock star
Get the show on, get paid
1311
01:43:49,884 --> 01:43:52,819
All that glitters is gold
1312
01:43:52,887 --> 01:43:56,914
Only shooting stars
break the mold
1313
01:43:58,459 --> 01:44:00,188
It's a cool place and
they say it gets colder
1314
01:44:00,261 --> 01:44:02,661
You're bundled up now
Wait till you get older
1315
01:44:02,730 --> 01:44:04,595
But the meteor men
beg to differ
1316
01:44:04,665 --> 01:44:06,428
Judgin' by the hole
in the satellite picture
1317
01:44:06,500 --> 01:44:08,695
The ice we skate
is gettin'pretty thin
1318
01:44:08,769 --> 01:44:11,169
The water's gettin' warm
so you might as well swim
1319
01:44:11,238 --> 01:44:13,536
My world's on fire
How about yours
1320
01:44:13,607 --> 01:44:16,508
That's the way I like it
and I'll never get bored
1321
01:44:16,577 --> 01:44:20,536
Hey, now, you're an all-star
Get your game on, go play
1322
01:44:20,614 --> 01:44:24,914
Hey, now, you're a rock star
Get the show on, get paid
1323
01:44:24,985 --> 01:44:28,216
All that glitters is gold
1324
01:44:28,289 --> 01:44:34,057
Only shooting stars
break the mold
1325
01:44:37,264 --> 01:44:39,630
Go to the moon
1326
01:44:40,801 --> 01:44:43,895
Go to the moon
1327
01:44:45,606 --> 01:44:48,268
Go to the moon
1328
01:44:48,342 --> 01:44:51,903
Oh, yeah, go to the moon
1329
01:44:51,979 --> 01:44:55,471
Hey, now, you're an all-star
Get your game on, go play
1330
01:44:55,549 --> 01:45:00,043
Hey, now, you're a rock star
Get the show on, get paid
1331
01:45:00,121 --> 01:45:03,420
All that glitters is gold
1332
01:45:03,491 --> 01:45:06,426
Only shooting stars
1333
01:45:06,494 --> 01:45:11,124
Somebody once asked could
I spare some change for gas
1334
01:45:11,198 --> 01:45:15,100
I need to get myself
away from this place
1335
01:45:15,169 --> 01:45:16,761
I said yep, what a concept
1336
01:45:16,837 --> 01:45:19,305
I could use
a little fuel myself
1337
01:45:19,373 --> 01:45:24,072
And we all could use
a little change
1338
01:45:24,145 --> 01:45:26,807
Well, the years start comin'
and they don't stop comin'
1339
01:45:26,881 --> 01:45:28,246
Fed to the rules and
I hit the ground runnin'
1340
01:45:28,315 --> 01:45:30,681
Didn't make sense
not to live for fun
1341
01:45:30,751 --> 01:45:33,015
Your brain gets smart
but your head gets dumb
1342
01:45:33,087 --> 01:45:35,021
So much to do
So much to see
1343
01:45:35,089 --> 01:45:37,250
So what's wrong with
takin' the back streets
1344
01:45:37,324 --> 01:45:38,757
You'll never know
if you don't go
1345
01:45:38,826 --> 01:45:41,454
You'll never shine
if you don't glow
1346
01:45:41,529 --> 01:45:45,260
Hey, now, you're an all-star
Get your game on, go play
1347
01:45:45,332 --> 01:45:50,201
Hey, now, you're a rock star
Get the show on, get paid
1348
01:45:50,271 --> 01:45:53,263
All that glitters is gold
1349
01:45:53,340 --> 01:45:58,471
Only shooting stars
break the mold
1350
01:45:58,546 --> 01:46:02,107
All that glitters is gold
1351
01:46:02,183 --> 01:46:09,112
Only shooting stars
break the mold
1352
01:46:10,558 --> 01:46:12,492
Thank you. Good night!
1353
01:52:06,558 --> 01:52:07,492
5@y3
104554
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