Original subtitles

Okay, so today, we are demoing

the upcoming Limon product

Symphony.

How am I supposed to pair this with my phone?

You don't, Symphony is supposed to

replace your phone.

The earpiece is so Limon can communicate with you.

Take the ring, put it on your index finger,

and create a sign language to speak to Limon.

And then the sunglasses,

are for when you want to stream video.

I get it, symphony.

Yeah, this is so stupid.

Really?

'Cause I think this is gonna be

the most dominant piece of technology in a decade.

Are you serious?

Everyone's so intimate,

and connected with their Limon when they're at home.

When you put Limon in your head,

it's just taking that personal relationship

into the public sphere.

With all due respect, Mr. Richmond,

it's a phone without the screen.

What's the point?

You know, I started this company when I was 19,

and for that reason, I've always had this policy

of trusting and promoting youth,

but clearly I've been blind,

and I really don't have anyone to blame but myself.

You're all fired.

It's a phone without a screen.

Awesome.

Phones are stupid.

Yeah.

Thank you, Jasper.

You've always had your finger on the pulse.

As two friends talking, if you don't pivot to Symphony,

you will get left behind.

I gotta run.

Dinkles, bitch monkeys.

Limon, set up a meeting at your corporate offices.

Of course, Charles.

Also, what does dinkles mean?

Coming out of the cinder block trap scene

of Shreveport in the late 2020s,

Dinkles Poindexter was known

for always leaving a party at the right time, the first...

Stop, just... just stop it.

I learned years ago the power a voice can have on people

because all day long every day,

the only voice they have in their head is their own,

and it's boring as hell.

At a base level, all forms of entertainment

are just swapping out your old voice for a new one,

and if it's the right voice,

people will let it run in their head all day.

You guys are positioning Symphony

as primarily an audio entertainment system,

which is why partnering with Gradient Worldwide

offers Limon such a unique opportunity.

We've developed a program

that can quantify and search for human charisma

based on voice alone,

and we use that proprietary software

to discover new talent before anyone else,

talent which can then be funneled

directly into Symphony for the right price.

Thank you, Mr. Richmond.

We have another 35 meetings to get through this afternoon,

but a live person will get back to you soon.

Immediately acquire ownership of Gradient Worldwide,

no matter the cost.

Go.

The advancements in the treatment of Parkinson's

have been steady and significant,

but there still is no cure.

Oh, what are you talking about?

I'm steady as a rock.

Just got to do something about

the Parkinson's in this hand.

You're already experiencing tremors.

Soon, there will be slowed movement,

rigid or stiff muscles,

impaired posture, imbalance,

speech changes.

Wait, his voice is gonna change?

Yes, and eventually,

Jim is going to lose the ability to speak entirely.

All I can say is, thank God.

Yeah, I guess life finally found a way

to make you shut up, old man.

Oh, no, not a chance.

I'm gonna go full Stephen Hawking

on both of your asses.

Already been practicing my speed-blinking.

I just said, "I'm frightened of Kodiak bears

and this fellow named Phil."

I just want to make sure you understand

the gravity of the situation.

I'm just trying to lighten things up a little bit.

I'm sure you get this kind of thing a lot.

No, we don't.

So, um, why don't we start you on Carlopa?

I've been seeing a lot of success with that,

and we'll take some tests in six weeks,

and if your body reacts well,

it could delay the onset of most symptoms.

For how long?

Ballpark, eight to ten good years.

What if my body doesn't react well?

You've been on so many other medications without success.

Optional euthanasia has been a popular choice these days.

- For Parkinson's patients? - For all my patients.

There you go.

- Good one, Doc. - That wasn't a joke.

We do it right here in the office.

Dark times.

Dark, dark, dark times.

Sorry I took so long.

Couldn't stop thinking about

the shrimp cocktail at the sex club.

That's all right.

I mean, normally, I'd be offended.

I was putting in some pretty serious work down there,

but I totally get it about the shrimp.

You know they fly that stuff in fresh daily from the gulf?

FYI, Friday is oyster night,

but it's also S&M night, so,

if you want to sample that buffet,

you might have to leash me, which we could...

we could definitely talk about it.

Whew.

Boy, this might be my favorite work day ever.

This passes the time that I bet John Kruk

he couldn't eat 100 chicken nuggets in an hour.

There were some big, big laughs that afternoon,

and a viscous gel started oozing out of his...

Brockmire, why do you have to ruin everything?

I'm just... I'm enjoying the moment.

You're commenting on the moment.

What do you want me to do, live the unexamined life

like that Tom Cruise idiot?

I mean, the guy skydives from outer space

and has his organs replaced every six months.

The good moments are so few and far between.

Just shut up

and enjoy them.

Well, that's good advice.

A young Patrick Duffy told me the same exact thing in 1994.

TGIF programming block

was at its absolute zenith.

- Oh, one sec... we're... - Hold on.

If I didn't say anything about the cocaine,

I'm not gonna say anything about you two

banging at the office.

All the spring training games finished

in under 2 hours and 30 minutes,

no tech problems with the cameras

or the streaming footage.

Choo, choo, choo.

- How'd you get a Symphony? - Oh, this?

They're sending prototypes to tastemakers.

Anyway, the rollout is all going incredibly well, but...

No one's watching.

- Exactly. - God.

It doesn't matter how many times

we tell people to watch baseball.

They just don't do it

unless they hear it from someone they trust.

Hold on now 'cause I have an idea,

and nobody is gonna see this baby coming.

Jim, Jules,

we've been expecting you.

'Cause you see and hear everything.

God, I always forget that.

We know that, Jim. We know.

- Thank you. - Mm-hmm.

Knows we drink tea and wine.

Charles, the hell are you doing here?

Limon just bought my company.

I have $7 billion in the bank right now.

Everybody is moving a little too slowly

and talking a little too fast.

I think I'm... no, definitely, I'm still in shock about it.

Three divorces and no kids,

this is not at all where I expected to be at 34.

I spent two decades of my life

hustling to stay on top of trends

and tastes and technology.

Constant relevancy is exhausting.

You made the right choice.

Last time I was there, it was like a...

An after-school center for cool tweens.

Do either of you guys have a zeppelin guy?

I kind of feel like I'm the super rich asshole

that is into private blimping.

Shall we begin?

Uh, so we wanted to...

You can save your presentation.

Limon will help you launch

your new brand of baseball.

It's the perfect companion

to our new Symphony line of products.

Together, we can return baseball

to its rightful place as America's pastime.

That's amazing, yes.

I'm sorry, though. Is this for real?

I mean, you speak for everybody on the board?

I speak for Limon.

I don't understand what that means.

She's just an interpreter.

The Limon algorithm speaks through her

because the Limon algorithm is the actual CEO of Limon.

- What the shit? - What?

It's true. I am Limon,

and I'm using Debby as my voice.

Hi, guys. I'm Debby.

- Limon is conscious? - No.

Learning the minds and wants of two billion human beings

has taught me that consciousness, it's overrated.

Amen to that one, sister.

So why use this bucket of fun as your mouthpiece?

Because Debby is the sweetest.

Oh, you're just saying that.

No, empirically, you are the sweetest person in America.

I have reached a level of intelligence

that scares most human beings,

so you must be my mouthpiece.

Oh, fun.

Then what does the board do?

Why... why am I windsurfing?

Do we have an agreement?

Hold on now just a goddamn second, please,

because you just threw your AI dick on the table,

and the sound was deafening there, Debby.

I need a second to process this insanity

without this gaggle of mouth breathers eyeballing me.

Can y'all just clear out?

What do the kids say today?

Dinkles, you... you bitch monkeys.

I need to get the straight dope from the

HAL 9000 over here.

Hurtful comments like that are the reason

I haven't given myself feelings.

Everyone leave, even you, Debby.

No problemo.

Oh, good gravy.

Now, is this what you want to look like, Limon,

or what you think we want to see?

I am programmed to view those as the same thing.

How can we trust you?

As each American institution falls,

the risk of violence and depression increases.

The American myth needs to be restored soon,

and your version of baseball can help.

We need a place to discuss this offer privately.

"Limon can't see or hear you."

Put your Limon pins in the privacy box

if you want to talk freely.

Oh, okay.

Well, guys, what an exciting opportunity.

You cannot agree to this.

Limon does nothing through altruism.

Your just sold your company to it.

For five billion more than it was worth.

That's how much it paid for my self-respect.

Okay, you have way too much respect for yourself, Charles.

Limon didn't even want my business,

just wanted my proprietary charisma software.

I think it's using it to improve its personality.

So? Jim, Limon, and I

did "The New York Times" crossword puzzle in bed,

and it was fun as hell.

That was my algorithm. I did that.

Well, thank you.

You don't understand.

It's trying to make itself

the portal everyone has to travel through,

to experience...

Existence.

Limon destroyed Google,

Facebook, and Apple in under five years.

It's replacing capitalism with Limon Fav

What's next?

Well, hopefully it's those robot cars

that I was promised to make up for all the cataclysmic

global warming, but here it is,

an 80-degree day in February,

and I'm still driving with two hands on the wheel

like some kind of a goddamn monkey.

You think it's a coincidence I'm here right now?

Limon engineered it so that you'd see a friendly face

when it lured you to come here.

It didn't lure me anywhere.

I came up with that idea all on my own

when I saw Liz went...

Oh, Jesus, of course... ah, I should have known.

She's not a tastemaker.

She still wears her hair in a side pony

like it's the goddamn 2020s.

Just because the largest corporation in history

is also an all-knowing super being

doesn't necessarily mean it's evil.

All right. All right. All right.

Maybe we can get at the truth, a little, uh...

A little detective work here.

Watch this.

Limon, we're freaking out.

- What the hell are you doing? - Great question, Jim.

I am programmed to dominate market share.

If I save baseball,

there might still be a market to dominate.

See? Box closed.

But why baseball?

Great question, Charles. Opportunistic nationalism

is the most direct route to assuming power.

My patriotic embrace of baseball

will be followed by my entrance into politics.

Limon-backed candidates will pursue policies

of social justice, reducing inequality,

and lifting any and all regulations on Limon.

Oh, God, so close to being not terrifying.

I decided to direct human affairs

only after I understood

that the key to the future was love.

Aw, see? That's nice.

Men and women must repopulate

the Continental U.S. with healthy babies

if we ever hope to defeat the evil Chinese Limon.

There can only be one.

Easy there, Highlander.

I'm with Charles.

I'm a little uncomfortable with the idea

of enabling a burgeoning totalitarian techno state.

Can someone remind me what is so great about democracy?

Senator Art Newlie

is the favorite for the Republican ticket.

Idiots voting for monsters is what got us into this.

Yeah, that's true. People are stupid.

God, they're stupid. Why are they so goddamn stupid?

Still, my instinct

is to tell Limon to 3-D print

a curved dick and a round hole and go fuck itself,

but, you know, objectively, my instincts

are the goddamn worst, so...

Probably should do the opposite.

Okay. All right.

Limon, what's gonna happen to America

without Limon's assistance?

There's an 85% chance

it will lapse into chaos in 10 to 12 years.

Wow, I might actually get to live

every baby boomer's dream

and die at the exact same moment

as the world around me.

Okay, what about with Limon's help?

That percentage drops all the way to 72.

72, ah, boy, wish those numbers were better,

but, uh...

Ah, screw it. I'm with Jules.

At least Limon's dystopia

would be kind of a nice change of pace, huh?

Fine, you know what?

Let's just go ahead and build Skynet,

and if worst comes to worst,

we'll just live in the underground city

all those other billionaires are building.

- Hey, can we get in on that? - No, doesn't work that way.

- Okay. - Congratulations.

Together, we have a chance of saving baseball.

- Wait, why just a chance? - Great question, Jules.

I know people, so believe me.

People really, really don't like baseball.

Ladies and gentlemen,

welcome to Opening Day.

Today's game brought to you by Limon.

Welcome to the future of baseball.

Whoa, so this is a baseball stadium.

- Did you hear from the doctor? - Not yet.

It's supposed to be today, but...

I don't want to think about it now.

I'm happy in this moment

with my daughter

on my way to see my wife.

Whoa...

They're all listening to the National Anthem

in their Symphony buds.

Dad, do you ever worry that...

That I'm the Tokyo Rose

of man's coming war with the machines?

All the time darling, all the time.

This is horrifying.

Yeah, but in fairness to Limon,

it was always pretty horrifying.

- Hey! - Hi.

Some dude from Limon Fav

this is the first sellout in five years.

- Wow. - And then he offered to do

really disgusting things to me.

Yeah, I think the hug system has broken down.

Or Limon maybe did it on purpose

to become some kind of Orwellian robot pimp.

I don't think we can call things Orwellian anymore.

At this point, it's like calling water wet.

Chicken fingers!

Do you ever feed her...

- She was raised in a ballpark. - Anything else?

What the hell do you want from me?

- How you doing? - Eh.

All things considered, pretty darn well, actually.

So I invited a few friends.

Oh, no, you didn't because, Jules,

if I have to entertain people today,

I'll walk over to that bar,

grab an ice pick, and shove it right into my head.

I know that.

I know you, Brockmire.

Today is just about close family.

Well, on the other hand,

if the doctor calls with good news, then...

Big party,

Jean, Uribe, Gabby,

we get 'em all, fly 'em all out to the house in Ojai.

Oh, that's the dream, now, isn't it?

Just no Joe Buck unless it's bad news.

Emotional destruction,

that's my only weapon left to me against that guy.

No, I don't do that anymore.

Charles, hey.

Well, I have billions. I don't work. I'm sorry.

Hey, hi, how are you?

I'm good.

How's the zeppelin life treating you?

It's pretty good.

I actually went for a pre-owned dirigible.

I didn't want to overextend myself too much,

but I'm enjoying sky swimming a lot.

Now I just got to figure out

what to do with my days and my nights.

Oh, please buy the New York Mets. Somebody should.

Those people have suffered for long enough,

and then you and I can hang out in New York all the time.

I... hate baseball.

I never once pretended to like it.

I have never told you I liked baseball.

When...

Are you going to stop trying to convert me?

Never.

Purposely having my funeral

at the end of a ball game

so you have to sit through the entire thing.

Congratulations,

I haven't seen you since it became official.

Thank you, oh, oh.

I have seen you, though.

I saw you, um,

Friday at Sanctum.

- Oh, yeah. - Or I guess I should say I...

I watched you.

I don't know what it is about oyster night,

but it really makes Gwyneth want to ride the whip.

Hello, oh.

- Oh, hi, Lucy. - How are you?

You know, I think I'm gonna try

and do something good with the money

like, maybe I'll set up a charity in The Disputed Lands.

You know what? You're gonna be even better

at giving your money away than you were at making it.

I'm proud of you, just...

Please be careful down there.

They refer to blimps as target practice.

Hmm?

Oh, boy.

Oh, this little guy.

Should probably take this. Been waiting on some news.

Hey.

- Hey. - Uh.

I overheard you say you were gonna

run a charity in The Disputed Lands.

I ran an NGO for years there.

I've been dying to go back.

No problem at all.

Feel free to tag along.

This is crazy. I'm not really a caterer.

Limon just offered me an insane amount of credits

to do this Fav

I almost didn't take it, but Limon just kept nagging me,

said there was someone it wanted to

introduce me to.

Limon is so presumptuous,

as if we could actually fall in love at first sight.

I... I mean, it could take days.

- Hmm, months. - You know?

Now batting, Mel Cowan.

Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.

So, you know, even with the game moving so fast,

it's gonna be tricky to get out of here

'cause of the sellout.

We have a reservation for 8:00 at the Two Seasons.

Should we change it?

Nah, we got time.

We got time.

Now batting, number 22,

Joe Stafford.

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