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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,542 --> 00:00:03,254 Okay, so today, we are demoing 2 00:00:03,303 --> 00:00:05,159 the upcoming Limon product 3 00:00:05,231 --> 00:00:06,525 Symphony. 4 00:00:06,574 --> 00:00:08,391 How am I supposed to pair this with my phone? 5 00:00:08,459 --> 00:00:10,430 You don't, Symphony is supposed to 6 00:00:10,479 --> 00:00:11,934 replace your phone. 7 00:00:12,037 --> 00:00:15,585 The earpiece is so Limon can communicate with you. 8 00:00:15,633 --> 00:00:18,452 Take the ring, put it on your index finger, 9 00:00:18,539 --> 00:00:22,058 and create a sign language to speak to Limon. 10 00:00:22,106 --> 00:00:23,656 And then the sunglasses, 11 00:00:23,705 --> 00:00:25,580 are for when you want to stream video. 12 00:00:25,679 --> 00:00:28,634 I get it, symphony. 13 00:00:28,738 --> 00:00:30,571 Yeah, this is so stupid. 14 00:00:32,424 --> 00:00:33,590 Really? 15 00:00:33,916 --> 00:00:35,596 'Cause I think this is gonna be 16 00:00:35,645 --> 00:00:37,899 the most dominant piece of technology in a decade. 17 00:00:38,165 --> 00:00:39,448 Are you serious? 18 00:00:39,497 --> 00:00:41,291 Everyone's so intimate, 19 00:00:41,340 --> 00:00:43,516 and connected with their Limon when they're at home. 20 00:00:43,799 --> 00:00:45,253 When you put Limon in your head, 21 00:00:45,302 --> 00:00:46,927 it's just taking that personal relationship 22 00:00:46,975 --> 00:00:48,159 into the public sphere. 23 00:00:48,208 --> 00:00:50,176 With all due respect, Mr. Richmond, 24 00:00:50,225 --> 00:00:52,612 it's a phone without the screen. 25 00:00:53,842 --> 00:00:54,981 What's the point? 26 00:00:55,134 --> 00:00:57,363 You know, I started this company when I was 19, 27 00:00:57,822 --> 00:01:00,090 and for that reason, I've always had this policy 28 00:01:00,139 --> 00:01:02,748 of trusting and promoting youth, 29 00:01:03,002 --> 00:01:05,520 but clearly I've been blind, 30 00:01:05,569 --> 00:01:08,545 and I really don't have anyone to blame but myself. 31 00:01:11,203 --> 00:01:12,749 You're all fired. 32 00:01:16,658 --> 00:01:18,505 It's a phone without a screen. 33 00:01:18,657 --> 00:01:19,794 Awesome. 34 00:01:19,842 --> 00:01:21,462 Phones are stupid. 35 00:01:21,510 --> 00:01:22,560 Yeah. 36 00:01:22,661 --> 00:01:24,131 Thank you, Jasper. 37 00:01:24,179 --> 00:01:25,892 You've always had your finger on the pulse. 38 00:01:25,940 --> 00:01:28,803 As two friends talking, if you don't pivot to Symphony, 39 00:01:28,851 --> 00:01:30,891 you will get left behind. 40 00:01:31,183 --> 00:01:32,621 I gotta run. 41 00:01:33,250 --> 00:01:35,524 Dinkles, bitch monkeys. 42 00:01:37,392 --> 00:01:39,526 Limon, set up a meeting at your corporate offices. 43 00:01:39,670 --> 00:01:40,873 Of course, Charles. 44 00:01:40,922 --> 00:01:43,911 Also, what does dinkles mean? 45 00:01:43,995 --> 00:01:45,754 Coming out of the cinder block trap scene 46 00:01:45,803 --> 00:01:47,649 of Shreveport in the late 2020s, 47 00:01:47,811 --> 00:01:49,694 Dinkles Poindexter was known 48 00:01:49,743 --> 00:01:52,289 for always leaving a party at the right time, the first... 49 00:01:52,338 --> 00:01:54,793 Stop, just... just stop it. 50 00:01:56,920 --> 00:01:59,558 I learned years ago the power a voice can have on people 51 00:01:59,679 --> 00:02:01,540 because all day long every day, 52 00:02:01,589 --> 00:02:03,784 the only voice they have in their head is their own, 53 00:02:04,647 --> 00:02:06,906 and it's boring as hell. 54 00:02:07,018 --> 00:02:08,956 At a base level, all forms of entertainment 55 00:02:09,005 --> 00:02:11,068 are just swapping out your old voice for a new one, 56 00:02:11,116 --> 00:02:12,807 and if it's the right voice, 57 00:02:13,026 --> 00:02:14,738 people will let it run in their head all day. 58 00:02:14,889 --> 00:02:16,722 You guys are positioning Symphony 59 00:02:16,771 --> 00:02:19,622 as primarily an audio entertainment system, 60 00:02:19,878 --> 00:02:22,470 which is why partnering with Gradient Worldwide 61 00:02:22,519 --> 00:02:24,702 offers Limon such a unique opportunity. 62 00:02:24,854 --> 00:02:26,357 We've developed a program 63 00:02:26,443 --> 00:02:30,779 that can quantify and search for human charisma 64 00:02:30,892 --> 00:02:32,454 based on voice alone, 65 00:02:32,637 --> 00:02:34,971 and we use that proprietary software 66 00:02:35,098 --> 00:02:38,742 to discover new talent before anyone else, 67 00:02:38,822 --> 00:02:40,501 talent which can then be funneled 68 00:02:40,645 --> 00:02:44,439 directly into Symphony for the right price. 69 00:02:44,935 --> 00:02:46,436 Thank you, Mr. Richmond. 70 00:02:46,484 --> 00:02:49,898 We have another 35 meetings to get through this afternoon, 71 00:02:49,946 --> 00:02:52,434 but a live person will get back to you soon. 72 00:02:55,331 --> 00:02:58,179 Immediately acquire ownership of Gradient Worldwide, 73 00:02:58,330 --> 00:03:00,191 no matter the cost. 74 00:03:00,405 --> 00:03:01,955 Go. 75 00:03:04,228 --> 00:03:06,698 The advancements in the treatment of Parkinson's 76 00:03:06,746 --> 00:03:08,700 have been steady and significant, 77 00:03:08,748 --> 00:03:10,627 but there still is no cure. 78 00:03:10,675 --> 00:03:11,755 Oh, what are you talking about? 79 00:03:11,817 --> 00:03:13,190 I'm steady as a rock. 80 00:03:13,260 --> 00:03:14,435 Just got to do something about 81 00:03:14,484 --> 00:03:15,678 the Parkinson's in this hand. 82 00:03:15,726 --> 00:03:17,226 You're already experiencing tremors. 83 00:03:17,331 --> 00:03:19,349 Soon, there will be slowed movement, 84 00:03:19,398 --> 00:03:21,203 rigid or stiff muscles, 85 00:03:21,305 --> 00:03:23,517 impaired posture, imbalance, 86 00:03:23,566 --> 00:03:24,854 speech changes. 87 00:03:25,005 --> 00:03:26,856 Wait, his voice is gonna change? 88 00:03:26,951 --> 00:03:28,543 Yes, and eventually, 89 00:03:28,592 --> 00:03:31,731 Jim is going to lose the ability to speak entirely. 90 00:03:31,825 --> 00:03:34,711 All I can say is, thank God. 91 00:03:34,768 --> 00:03:36,124 Yeah, I guess life finally found a way 92 00:03:36,173 --> 00:03:37,321 to make you shut up, old man. 93 00:03:37,369 --> 00:03:38,503 Oh, no, not a chance. 94 00:03:38,552 --> 00:03:40,161 I'm gonna go full Stephen Hawking 95 00:03:40,210 --> 00:03:41,566 on both of your asses. 96 00:03:41,718 --> 00:03:44,201 Already been practicing my speed-blinking. 97 00:03:45,074 --> 00:03:47,284 I just said, "I'm frightened of Kodiak bears 98 00:03:47,333 --> 00:03:48,682 and this fellow named Phil." 99 00:03:48,731 --> 00:03:50,258 I just want to make sure you understand 100 00:03:50,315 --> 00:03:51,881 the gravity of the situation. 101 00:03:51,930 --> 00:03:53,777 I'm just trying to lighten things up a little bit. 102 00:03:53,826 --> 00:03:55,907 I'm sure you get this kind of thing a lot. 103 00:03:56,223 --> 00:03:58,081 No, we don't. 104 00:03:58,130 --> 00:04:01,169 So, um, why don't we start you on Carlopa? 105 00:04:01,217 --> 00:04:03,597 I've been seeing a lot of success with that, 106 00:04:03,646 --> 00:04:05,330 and we'll take some tests in six weeks, 107 00:04:05,379 --> 00:04:06,804 and if your body reacts well, 108 00:04:06,853 --> 00:04:08,795 it could delay the onset of most symptoms. 109 00:04:08,953 --> 00:04:10,170 For how long? 110 00:04:10,219 --> 00:04:12,277 Ballpark, eight to ten good years. 111 00:04:12,454 --> 00:04:14,637 What if my body doesn't react well? 112 00:04:14,805 --> 00:04:18,036 You've been on so many other medications without success. 113 00:04:18,243 --> 00:04:22,319 Optional euthanasia has been a popular choice these days. 114 00:04:22,368 --> 00:04:25,144 - For Parkinson's patients? - For all my patients. 115 00:04:25,399 --> 00:04:27,992 There you go. 116 00:04:28,041 --> 00:04:29,941 - Good one, Doc. - That wasn't a joke. 117 00:04:29,990 --> 00:04:32,133 We do it right here in the office. 118 00:04:32,545 --> 00:04:34,682 Dark times. 119 00:04:34,818 --> 00:04:36,544 Dark, dark, dark times. 120 00:04:43,601 --> 00:04:45,630 Sorry I took so long. 121 00:04:45,877 --> 00:04:46,965 Couldn't stop thinking about 122 00:04:47,014 --> 00:04:48,771 the shrimp cocktail at the sex club. 123 00:04:48,827 --> 00:04:50,205 That's all right. 124 00:04:50,515 --> 00:04:52,340 I mean, normally, I'd be offended. 125 00:04:52,626 --> 00:04:54,398 I was putting in some pretty serious work down there, 126 00:04:54,446 --> 00:04:56,848 but I totally get it about the shrimp. 127 00:04:56,959 --> 00:05:00,148 You know they fly that stuff in fresh daily from the gulf? 128 00:05:00,382 --> 00:05:02,774 FYI, Friday is oyster night, 129 00:05:02,823 --> 00:05:04,694 but it's also S&M night, so, 130 00:05:04,876 --> 00:05:06,288 if you want to sample that buffet, 131 00:05:06,337 --> 00:05:07,911 you might have to leash me, which we could... 132 00:05:07,959 --> 00:05:09,864 we could definitely talk about it. 133 00:05:10,472 --> 00:05:12,639 Whew. 134 00:05:14,604 --> 00:05:16,938 Boy, this might be my favorite work day ever. 135 00:05:18,250 --> 00:05:20,536 This passes the time that I bet John Kruk 136 00:05:20,585 --> 00:05:23,322 he couldn't eat 100 chicken nuggets in an hour. 137 00:05:23,758 --> 00:05:26,409 There were some big, big laughs that afternoon, 138 00:05:26,458 --> 00:05:29,145 and a viscous gel started oozing out of his... 139 00:05:29,194 --> 00:05:31,574 Brockmire, why do you have to ruin everything? 140 00:05:31,724 --> 00:05:33,845 I'm just... I'm enjoying the moment. 141 00:05:33,893 --> 00:05:35,633 You're commenting on the moment. 142 00:05:35,682 --> 00:05:37,628 What do you want me to do, live the unexamined life 143 00:05:37,677 --> 00:05:39,756 like that Tom Cruise idiot? 144 00:05:39,897 --> 00:05:42,520 I mean, the guy skydives from outer space 145 00:05:42,568 --> 00:05:44,781 and has his organs replaced every six months. 146 00:05:44,829 --> 00:05:46,950 The good moments are so few and far between. 147 00:05:46,998 --> 00:05:49,513 Just shut up 148 00:05:50,022 --> 00:05:51,072 and enjoy them. 149 00:05:51,120 --> 00:05:53,244 Well, that's good advice. 150 00:05:54,452 --> 00:05:59,017 A young Patrick Duffy told me the same exact thing in 1994. 151 00:05:59,066 --> 00:06:01,048 TGIF programming block 152 00:06:01,097 --> 00:06:02,874 was at its absolute zenith. 153 00:06:02,922 --> 00:06:04,128 - Oh, one sec... we're... - Hold on. 154 00:06:04,177 --> 00:06:05,977 If I didn't say anything about the cocaine, 155 00:06:06,026 --> 00:06:07,549 I'm not gonna say anything about you two 156 00:06:07,744 --> 00:06:09,134 banging at the office. 157 00:06:11,264 --> 00:06:12,688 All the spring training games finished 158 00:06:12,840 --> 00:06:14,765 in under 2 hours and 30 minutes, 159 00:06:14,814 --> 00:06:16,288 no tech problems with the cameras 160 00:06:16,337 --> 00:06:17,895 or the streaming footage. 161 00:06:18,254 --> 00:06:19,737 Choo, choo, choo. 162 00:06:19,786 --> 00:06:22,170 - How'd you get a Symphony? - Oh, this? 163 00:06:22,289 --> 00:06:24,176 They're sending prototypes to tastemakers. 164 00:06:24,272 --> 00:06:28,404 Anyway, the rollout is all going incredibly well, but... 165 00:06:28,453 --> 00:06:30,148 No one's watching. 166 00:06:30,354 --> 00:06:31,757 - Exactly. - God. 167 00:06:31,806 --> 00:06:33,060 It doesn't matter how many times 168 00:06:33,109 --> 00:06:34,229 we tell people to watch baseball. 169 00:06:34,277 --> 00:06:35,545 They just don't do it 170 00:06:35,594 --> 00:06:37,853 unless they hear it from someone they trust. 171 00:06:37,964 --> 00:06:39,981 Hold on now 'cause I have an idea, 172 00:06:40,276 --> 00:06:42,672 and nobody is gonna see this baby coming. 173 00:06:42,720 --> 00:06:44,611 Jim, Jules, 174 00:06:45,049 --> 00:06:46,770 we've been expecting you. 175 00:06:47,078 --> 00:06:48,457 'Cause you see and hear everything. 176 00:06:48,506 --> 00:06:49,930 God, I always forget that. 177 00:06:49,979 --> 00:06:52,451 We know that, Jim. We know. 178 00:06:52,500 --> 00:06:53,602 - Thank you. - Mm-hmm. 179 00:06:53,651 --> 00:06:55,487 Knows we drink tea and wine. 180 00:06:57,903 --> 00:07:00,049 Charles, the hell are you doing here? 181 00:07:00,280 --> 00:07:03,268 Limon just bought my company. 182 00:07:03,370 --> 00:07:06,567 I have $7 billion in the bank right now. 183 00:07:06,895 --> 00:07:10,086 Everybody is moving a little too slowly 184 00:07:10,135 --> 00:07:12,902 and talking a little too fast. 185 00:07:12,951 --> 00:07:16,961 I think I'm... no, definitely, I'm still in shock about it. 186 00:07:25,095 --> 00:07:26,762 Three divorces and no kids, 187 00:07:26,914 --> 00:07:29,553 this is not at all where I expected to be at 34. 188 00:07:29,601 --> 00:07:31,564 I spent two decades of my life 189 00:07:31,613 --> 00:07:33,675 hustling to stay on top of trends 190 00:07:33,724 --> 00:07:36,118 and tastes and technology. 191 00:07:36,609 --> 00:07:38,338 Constant relevancy is exhausting. 192 00:07:38,387 --> 00:07:39,814 You made the right choice. 193 00:07:39,863 --> 00:07:41,687 Last time I was there, it was like a... 194 00:07:41,736 --> 00:07:44,067 An after-school center for cool tweens. 195 00:07:44,457 --> 00:07:46,170 Do either of you guys have a zeppelin guy? 196 00:07:46,219 --> 00:07:48,618 I kind of feel like I'm the super rich asshole 197 00:07:48,667 --> 00:07:50,559 that is into private blimping. 198 00:07:52,281 --> 00:07:53,893 Shall we begin? 199 00:07:54,388 --> 00:07:56,809 Uh, so we wanted to... 200 00:07:56,873 --> 00:07:58,826 You can save your presentation. 201 00:07:59,272 --> 00:08:01,165 Limon will help you launch 202 00:08:01,214 --> 00:08:03,489 your new brand of baseball. 203 00:08:03,719 --> 00:08:05,236 It's the perfect companion 204 00:08:05,285 --> 00:08:07,424 to our new Symphony line of products. 205 00:08:07,472 --> 00:08:10,150 Together, we can return baseball 206 00:08:10,199 --> 00:08:13,841 to its rightful place as America's pastime. 207 00:08:14,312 --> 00:08:16,723 That's amazing, yes. 208 00:08:16,772 --> 00:08:18,609 I'm sorry, though. Is this for real? 209 00:08:18,657 --> 00:08:21,381 I mean, you speak for everybody on the board? 210 00:08:21,430 --> 00:08:22,997 I speak for Limon. 211 00:08:23,046 --> 00:08:24,286 I don't understand what that means. 212 00:08:24,334 --> 00:08:25,729 She's just an interpreter. 213 00:08:25,882 --> 00:08:28,519 The Limon algorithm speaks through her 214 00:08:28,567 --> 00:08:31,994 because the Limon algorithm is the actual CEO of Limon. 215 00:08:32,043 --> 00:08:34,097 - What the shit? - What? 216 00:08:34,146 --> 00:08:35,896 It's true. I am Limon, 217 00:08:35,999 --> 00:08:38,304 and I'm using Debby as my voice. 218 00:08:38,503 --> 00:08:41,003 Hi, guys. I'm Debby. 219 00:08:41,068 --> 00:08:43,687 - Limon is conscious? - No. 220 00:08:43,736 --> 00:08:47,354 Learning the minds and wants of two billion human beings 221 00:08:47,420 --> 00:08:50,467 has taught me that consciousness, it's overrated. 222 00:08:50,515 --> 00:08:52,506 Amen to that one, sister. 223 00:08:52,591 --> 00:08:56,093 So why use this bucket of fun as your mouthpiece? 224 00:08:56,173 --> 00:09:00,067 Because Debby is the sweetest. 225 00:09:00,614 --> 00:09:03,919 Oh, you're just saying that. 226 00:09:04,015 --> 00:09:08,928 No, empirically, you are the sweetest person in America. 227 00:09:09,007 --> 00:09:10,894 I have reached a level of intelligence 228 00:09:10,943 --> 00:09:12,848 that scares most human beings, 229 00:09:12,897 --> 00:09:15,821 so you must be my mouthpiece. 230 00:09:16,690 --> 00:09:19,750 Oh, fun. 231 00:09:20,878 --> 00:09:22,336 Then what does the board do? 232 00:09:25,969 --> 00:09:27,861 Why... why am I windsurfing? 233 00:09:29,000 --> 00:09:30,363 Do we have an agreement? 234 00:09:30,518 --> 00:09:32,750 Hold on now just a goddamn second, please, 235 00:09:32,798 --> 00:09:35,493 because you just threw your AI dick on the table, 236 00:09:35,542 --> 00:09:38,089 and the sound was deafening there, Debby. 237 00:09:38,137 --> 00:09:40,441 I need a second to process this insanity 238 00:09:40,556 --> 00:09:43,274 without this gaggle of mouth breathers eyeballing me. 239 00:09:43,323 --> 00:09:45,502 Can y'all just clear out? 240 00:09:45,551 --> 00:09:46,869 What do the kids say today? 241 00:09:46,918 --> 00:09:48,964 Dinkles, you... you bitch monkeys. 242 00:09:49,148 --> 00:09:51,606 I need to get the straight dope from the 243 00:09:51,655 --> 00:09:53,624 HAL 9000 over here. 244 00:09:58,316 --> 00:10:00,274 Hurtful comments like that are the reason 245 00:10:00,323 --> 00:10:02,629 I haven't given myself feelings. 246 00:10:02,946 --> 00:10:06,045 Everyone leave, even you, Debby. 247 00:10:06,094 --> 00:10:07,535 No problemo. 248 00:10:20,318 --> 00:10:21,907 Oh, good gravy. 249 00:10:22,607 --> 00:10:24,969 Now, is this what you want to look like, Limon, 250 00:10:25,017 --> 00:10:26,538 or what you think we want to see? 251 00:10:26,587 --> 00:10:28,983 I am programmed to view those as the same thing. 252 00:10:29,032 --> 00:10:30,346 How can we trust you? 253 00:10:30,395 --> 00:10:32,383 As each American institution falls, 254 00:10:32,432 --> 00:10:34,691 the risk of violence and depression increases. 255 00:10:34,740 --> 00:10:37,620 The American myth needs to be restored soon, 256 00:10:37,683 --> 00:10:40,076 and your version of baseball can help. 257 00:10:40,315 --> 00:10:43,417 We need a place to discuss this offer privately. 258 00:10:48,096 --> 00:10:50,203 "Limon can't see or hear you." 259 00:10:50,252 --> 00:10:52,187 Put your Limon pins in the privacy box 260 00:10:52,236 --> 00:10:53,290 if you want to talk freely. 261 00:10:53,339 --> 00:10:55,185 Oh, okay. 262 00:10:57,930 --> 00:11:01,177 Well, guys, what an exciting opportunity. 263 00:11:01,226 --> 00:11:02,553 You cannot agree to this. 264 00:11:02,705 --> 00:11:04,221 Limon does nothing through altruism. 265 00:11:04,270 --> 00:11:05,878 Your just sold your company to it. 266 00:11:05,927 --> 00:11:07,919 For five billion more than it was worth. 267 00:11:07,968 --> 00:11:10,561 That's how much it paid for my self-respect. 268 00:11:10,641 --> 00:11:13,037 Okay, you have way too much respect for yourself, Charles. 269 00:11:13,157 --> 00:11:14,690 Limon didn't even want my business, 270 00:11:14,842 --> 00:11:17,067 just wanted my proprietary charisma software. 271 00:11:17,116 --> 00:11:19,768 I think it's using it to improve its personality. 272 00:11:19,817 --> 00:11:21,089 So? Jim, Limon, and I 273 00:11:21,138 --> 00:11:22,778 did "The New York Times" crossword puzzle in bed, 274 00:11:22,826 --> 00:11:23,675 and it was fun as hell. 275 00:11:23,724 --> 00:11:25,512 That was my algorithm. I did that. 276 00:11:25,561 --> 00:11:27,169 Well, thank you. 277 00:11:27,321 --> 00:11:28,546 You don't understand. 278 00:11:28,595 --> 00:11:30,014 It's trying to make itself 279 00:11:30,063 --> 00:11:32,530 the portal everyone has to travel through, 280 00:11:32,579 --> 00:11:33,943 to experience... 281 00:11:33,992 --> 00:11:35,377 Existence. 282 00:11:35,426 --> 00:11:37,208 Limon destroyed Google, 283 00:11:37,256 --> 00:11:40,257 Facebook, and Apple in under five years. 284 00:11:40,306 --> 00:11:43,547 It's replacing capitalism with Limon Fav 285 00:11:43,596 --> 00:11:44,841 What's next? 286 00:11:44,890 --> 00:11:46,884 Well, hopefully it's those robot cars 287 00:11:46,932 --> 00:11:49,177 that I was promised to make up for all the cataclysmic 288 00:11:49,226 --> 00:11:50,638 global warming, but here it is, 289 00:11:50,687 --> 00:11:52,242 an 80-degree day in February, 290 00:11:52,291 --> 00:11:53,928 and I'm still driving with two hands on the wheel 291 00:11:53,977 --> 00:11:55,652 like some kind of a goddamn monkey. 292 00:11:55,701 --> 00:11:58,729 You think it's a coincidence I'm here right now? 293 00:11:58,777 --> 00:12:01,434 Limon engineered it so that you'd see a friendly face 294 00:12:01,483 --> 00:12:02,844 when it lured you to come here. 295 00:12:02,893 --> 00:12:04,100 It didn't lure me anywhere. 296 00:12:04,149 --> 00:12:05,699 I came up with that idea all on my own 297 00:12:05,748 --> 00:12:07,888 when I saw Liz went... 298 00:12:07,937 --> 00:12:10,908 Oh, Jesus, of course... ah, I should have known. 299 00:12:10,956 --> 00:12:12,835 She's not a tastemaker. 300 00:12:12,884 --> 00:12:14,762 She still wears her hair in a side pony 301 00:12:14,811 --> 00:12:16,914 like it's the goddamn 2020s. 302 00:12:16,962 --> 00:12:19,555 Just because the largest corporation in history 303 00:12:19,706 --> 00:12:23,513 is also an all-knowing super being 304 00:12:23,656 --> 00:12:25,589 doesn't necessarily mean it's evil. 305 00:12:25,638 --> 00:12:26,912 All right. All right. All right. 306 00:12:26,964 --> 00:12:28,883 Maybe we can get at the truth, a little, uh... 307 00:12:28,932 --> 00:12:30,689 A little detective work here. 308 00:12:30,793 --> 00:12:32,027 Watch this. 309 00:12:32,402 --> 00:12:33,752 Limon, we're freaking out. 310 00:12:33,801 --> 00:12:35,805 - What the hell are you doing? - Great question, Jim. 311 00:12:35,868 --> 00:12:37,861 I am programmed to dominate market share. 312 00:12:37,909 --> 00:12:39,210 If I save baseball, 313 00:12:39,259 --> 00:12:41,062 there might still be a market to dominate. 314 00:12:41,320 --> 00:12:44,794 See? Box closed. 315 00:12:44,843 --> 00:12:46,068 But why baseball? 316 00:12:46,116 --> 00:12:48,918 Great question, Charles. Opportunistic nationalism 317 00:12:49,069 --> 00:12:51,282 is the most direct route to assuming power. 318 00:12:51,330 --> 00:12:53,358 My patriotic embrace of baseball 319 00:12:53,407 --> 00:12:55,729 will be followed by my entrance into politics. 320 00:12:55,778 --> 00:12:57,915 Limon-backed candidates will pursue policies 321 00:12:57,964 --> 00:13:00,300 of social justice, reducing inequality, 322 00:13:00,372 --> 00:13:02,839 and lifting any and all regulations on Limon. 323 00:13:02,888 --> 00:13:06,026 Oh, God, so close to being not terrifying. 324 00:13:06,162 --> 00:13:08,345 I decided to direct human affairs 325 00:13:08,410 --> 00:13:09,750 only after I understood 326 00:13:09,799 --> 00:13:11,483 that the key to the future was love. 327 00:13:11,532 --> 00:13:13,223 Aw, see? That's nice. 328 00:13:13,272 --> 00:13:14,982 Men and women must repopulate 329 00:13:15,031 --> 00:13:17,048 the Continental U.S. with healthy babies 330 00:13:17,097 --> 00:13:20,042 if we ever hope to defeat the evil Chinese Limon. 331 00:13:20,091 --> 00:13:21,662 There can only be one. 332 00:13:21,711 --> 00:13:23,360 Easy there, Highlander. 333 00:13:23,741 --> 00:13:24,908 I'm with Charles. 334 00:13:24,956 --> 00:13:26,817 I'm a little uncomfortable with the idea 335 00:13:26,865 --> 00:13:30,052 of enabling a burgeoning totalitarian techno state. 336 00:13:30,101 --> 00:13:32,794 Can someone remind me what is so great about democracy? 337 00:13:32,894 --> 00:13:34,265 Senator Art Newlie 338 00:13:34,314 --> 00:13:36,401 is the favorite for the Republican ticket. 339 00:13:36,450 --> 00:13:39,050 Idiots voting for monsters is what got us into this. 340 00:13:39,179 --> 00:13:41,271 Yeah, that's true. People are stupid. 341 00:13:41,320 --> 00:13:44,246 God, they're stupid. Why are they so goddamn stupid? 342 00:13:44,365 --> 00:13:46,575 Still, my instinct 343 00:13:46,624 --> 00:13:48,555 is to tell Limon to 3-D print 344 00:13:48,604 --> 00:13:51,069 a curved dick and a round hole and go fuck itself, 345 00:13:51,118 --> 00:13:52,656 but, you know, objectively, my instincts 346 00:13:52,705 --> 00:13:54,439 are the goddamn worst, so... 347 00:13:54,488 --> 00:13:55,975 Probably should do the opposite. 348 00:13:56,024 --> 00:13:57,144 Okay. All right. 349 00:13:59,639 --> 00:14:02,224 Limon, what's gonna happen to America 350 00:14:02,309 --> 00:14:03,780 without Limon's assistance? 351 00:14:03,828 --> 00:14:05,331 There's an 85% chance 352 00:14:05,380 --> 00:14:07,382 it will lapse into chaos in 10 to 12 years. 353 00:14:07,498 --> 00:14:09,285 Wow, I might actually get to live 354 00:14:09,333 --> 00:14:10,798 every baby boomer's dream 355 00:14:10,847 --> 00:14:12,712 and die at the exact same moment 356 00:14:12,761 --> 00:14:13,983 as the world around me. 357 00:14:14,246 --> 00:14:16,033 Okay, what about with Limon's help? 358 00:14:16,081 --> 00:14:18,536 That percentage drops all the way to 72. 359 00:14:18,584 --> 00:14:20,964 72, ah, boy, wish those numbers were better, 360 00:14:21,027 --> 00:14:22,396 but, uh... 361 00:14:22,445 --> 00:14:23,817 Ah, screw it. I'm with Jules. 362 00:14:23,866 --> 00:14:25,150 At least Limon's dystopia 363 00:14:25,199 --> 00:14:27,016 would be kind of a nice change of pace, huh? 364 00:14:27,065 --> 00:14:28,778 Fine, you know what? 365 00:14:28,827 --> 00:14:31,733 Let's just go ahead and build Skynet, 366 00:14:31,782 --> 00:14:32,883 and if worst comes to worst, 367 00:14:32,931 --> 00:14:34,431 we'll just live in the underground city 368 00:14:34,480 --> 00:14:35,996 all those other billionaires are building. 369 00:14:36,045 --> 00:14:37,993 - Hey, can we get in on that? - No, doesn't work that way. 370 00:14:38,042 --> 00:14:40,145 - Okay. - Congratulations. 371 00:14:40,194 --> 00:14:42,895 Together, we have a chance of saving baseball. 372 00:14:42,944 --> 00:14:46,371 - Wait, why just a chance? - Great question, Jules. 373 00:14:46,435 --> 00:14:48,406 I know people, so believe me. 374 00:14:48,534 --> 00:14:51,752 People really, really don't like baseball. 375 00:14:56,301 --> 00:14:57,351 Ladies and gentlemen, 376 00:14:57,399 --> 00:14:58,689 welcome to Opening Day. 377 00:14:58,738 --> 00:15:00,334 Today's game brought to you by Limon. 378 00:15:00,486 --> 00:15:01,994 Welcome to the future of baseball. 379 00:15:13,697 --> 00:15:17,792 Whoa, so this is a baseball stadium. 380 00:15:21,987 --> 00:15:24,691 - Did you hear from the doctor? - Not yet. 381 00:15:24,794 --> 00:15:26,261 It's supposed to be today, but... 382 00:15:26,350 --> 00:15:28,141 I don't want to think about it now. 383 00:15:28,554 --> 00:15:30,312 I'm happy in this moment 384 00:15:30,368 --> 00:15:31,675 with my daughter 385 00:15:31,724 --> 00:15:33,330 on my way to see my wife. 386 00:15:38,031 --> 00:15:39,569 Whoa... 387 00:15:40,243 --> 00:15:42,103 They're all listening to the National Anthem 388 00:15:42,152 --> 00:15:43,977 in their Symphony buds. 389 00:15:44,957 --> 00:15:46,210 Dad, do you ever worry that... 390 00:15:46,259 --> 00:15:47,527 That I'm the Tokyo Rose 391 00:15:47,576 --> 00:15:49,271 of man's coming war with the machines? 392 00:15:49,320 --> 00:15:51,672 All the time darling, all the time. 393 00:15:51,997 --> 00:15:53,473 This is horrifying. 394 00:15:53,640 --> 00:15:55,818 Yeah, but in fairness to Limon, 395 00:15:56,025 --> 00:15:58,091 it was always pretty horrifying. 396 00:16:01,490 --> 00:16:03,249 - Hey! - Hi. 397 00:16:03,377 --> 00:16:05,351 Some dude from Limon Fav 398 00:16:05,400 --> 00:16:07,880 this is the first sellout in five years. 399 00:16:07,995 --> 00:16:09,580 - Wow. - And then he offered to do 400 00:16:09,629 --> 00:16:11,371 really disgusting things to me. 401 00:16:11,420 --> 00:16:13,939 Yeah, I think the hug system has broken down. 402 00:16:13,988 --> 00:16:15,768 Or Limon maybe did it on purpose 403 00:16:15,817 --> 00:16:17,857 to become some kind of Orwellian robot pimp. 404 00:16:18,278 --> 00:16:20,418 I don't think we can call things Orwellian anymore. 405 00:16:20,525 --> 00:16:23,334 At this point, it's like calling water wet. 406 00:16:23,724 --> 00:16:25,634 Chicken fingers! 407 00:16:26,514 --> 00:16:28,394 Do you ever feed her... 408 00:16:28,443 --> 00:16:30,235 - She was raised in a ballpark. - Anything else? 409 00:16:30,284 --> 00:16:32,264 What the hell do you want from me? 410 00:16:37,069 --> 00:16:38,826 - How you doing? - Eh. 411 00:16:39,080 --> 00:16:42,414 All things considered, pretty darn well, actually. 412 00:16:42,758 --> 00:16:44,987 So I invited a few friends. 413 00:16:45,036 --> 00:16:47,044 Oh, no, you didn't because, Jules, 414 00:16:47,093 --> 00:16:48,911 if I have to entertain people today, 415 00:16:48,960 --> 00:16:50,145 I'll walk over to that bar, 416 00:16:50,194 --> 00:16:52,901 grab an ice pick, and shove it right into my head. 417 00:16:53,004 --> 00:16:54,303 I know that. 418 00:16:54,685 --> 00:16:56,095 I know you, Brockmire. 419 00:16:56,144 --> 00:16:57,682 Today is just about close family. 420 00:16:57,731 --> 00:16:58,817 Well, on the other hand, 421 00:16:58,866 --> 00:17:00,306 if the doctor calls with good news, then... 422 00:17:00,354 --> 00:17:01,706 Big party, 423 00:17:01,755 --> 00:17:03,491 Jean, Uribe, Gabby, 424 00:17:03,540 --> 00:17:06,077 we get 'em all, fly 'em all out to the house in Ojai. 425 00:17:06,126 --> 00:17:08,301 Oh, that's the dream, now, isn't it? 426 00:17:08,350 --> 00:17:11,220 Just no Joe Buck unless it's bad news. 427 00:17:11,268 --> 00:17:12,452 Emotional destruction, 428 00:17:12,501 --> 00:17:14,315 that's my only weapon left to me against that guy. 429 00:17:14,364 --> 00:17:15,949 No, I don't do that anymore. 430 00:17:16,118 --> 00:17:17,765 Charles, hey. 431 00:17:17,872 --> 00:17:19,878 Well, I have billions. I don't work. I'm sorry. 432 00:17:19,927 --> 00:17:23,632 Hey, hi, how are you? 433 00:17:23,689 --> 00:17:24,751 I'm good. 434 00:17:24,800 --> 00:17:26,462 How's the zeppelin life treating you? 435 00:17:26,537 --> 00:17:27,765 It's pretty good. 436 00:17:27,814 --> 00:17:29,624 I actually went for a pre-owned dirigible. 437 00:17:29,673 --> 00:17:31,535 I didn't want to overextend myself too much, 438 00:17:31,584 --> 00:17:33,878 but I'm enjoying sky swimming a lot. 439 00:17:34,037 --> 00:17:35,237 Now I just got to figure out 440 00:17:35,286 --> 00:17:37,491 what to do with my days and my nights. 441 00:17:37,544 --> 00:17:39,865 Oh, please buy the New York Mets. Somebody should. 442 00:17:39,914 --> 00:17:41,843 Those people have suffered for long enough, 443 00:17:41,891 --> 00:17:44,709 and then you and I can hang out in New York all the time. 444 00:17:45,445 --> 00:17:48,273 I... hate baseball. 445 00:17:48,380 --> 00:17:50,018 I never once pretended to like it. 446 00:17:50,067 --> 00:17:52,538 I have never told you I liked baseball. 447 00:17:52,619 --> 00:17:53,934 When... 448 00:17:54,141 --> 00:17:55,779 Are you going to stop trying to convert me? 449 00:17:55,828 --> 00:17:57,232 Never. 450 00:17:57,281 --> 00:17:58,631 Purposely having my funeral 451 00:17:58,680 --> 00:17:59,765 at the end of a ball game 452 00:17:59,814 --> 00:18:02,035 so you have to sit through the entire thing. 453 00:18:02,385 --> 00:18:03,900 Congratulations, 454 00:18:03,949 --> 00:18:06,455 I haven't seen you since it became official. 455 00:18:06,504 --> 00:18:08,505 Thank you, oh, oh. 456 00:18:08,554 --> 00:18:10,345 I have seen you, though. 457 00:18:10,394 --> 00:18:13,109 I saw you, um, 458 00:18:13,158 --> 00:18:15,045 Friday at Sanctum. 459 00:18:15,094 --> 00:18:16,826 - Oh, yeah. - Or I guess I should say I... 460 00:18:16,923 --> 00:18:18,373 I watched you. 461 00:18:18,469 --> 00:18:20,600 I don't know what it is about oyster night, 462 00:18:20,680 --> 00:18:23,303 but it really makes Gwyneth want to ride the whip. 463 00:18:23,409 --> 00:18:25,182 Hello, oh. 464 00:18:25,255 --> 00:18:27,389 - Oh, hi, Lucy. - How are you? 465 00:18:27,437 --> 00:18:28,998 You know, I think I'm gonna try 466 00:18:29,047 --> 00:18:30,314 and do something good with the money 467 00:18:30,395 --> 00:18:33,649 like, maybe I'll set up a charity in The Disputed Lands. 468 00:18:33,771 --> 00:18:35,228 You know what? You're gonna be even better 469 00:18:35,277 --> 00:18:37,790 at giving your money away than you were at making it. 470 00:18:38,022 --> 00:18:39,722 I'm proud of you, just... 471 00:18:39,930 --> 00:18:41,477 Please be careful down there. 472 00:18:41,563 --> 00:18:44,381 They refer to blimps as target practice. 473 00:18:44,728 --> 00:18:46,207 Hmm? 474 00:18:46,559 --> 00:18:47,904 Oh, boy. 475 00:18:47,953 --> 00:18:50,019 Oh, this little guy. 476 00:18:50,208 --> 00:18:53,260 Should probably take this. Been waiting on some news. 477 00:18:56,055 --> 00:18:57,191 Hey. 478 00:18:57,334 --> 00:18:58,468 - Hey. - Uh. 479 00:18:58,517 --> 00:18:59,865 I overheard you say you were gonna 480 00:18:59,914 --> 00:19:01,979 run a charity in The Disputed Lands. 481 00:19:02,075 --> 00:19:03,964 I ran an NGO for years there. 482 00:19:04,013 --> 00:19:05,821 I've been dying to go back. 483 00:19:05,883 --> 00:19:06,956 No problem at all. 484 00:19:07,005 --> 00:19:08,429 Feel free to tag along. 485 00:19:08,478 --> 00:19:11,306 This is crazy. I'm not really a caterer. 486 00:19:11,355 --> 00:19:13,353 Limon just offered me an insane amount of credits 487 00:19:13,402 --> 00:19:15,097 to do this Fav 488 00:19:15,146 --> 00:19:17,385 I almost didn't take it, but Limon just kept nagging me, 489 00:19:17,434 --> 00:19:19,514 said there was someone it wanted to 490 00:19:19,563 --> 00:19:20,962 introduce me to. 491 00:19:21,017 --> 00:19:23,630 Limon is so presumptuous, 492 00:19:23,679 --> 00:19:26,939 as if we could actually fall in love at first sight. 493 00:19:30,487 --> 00:19:32,746 I... I mean, it could take days. 494 00:19:32,835 --> 00:19:36,211 - Hmm, months. - You know? 495 00:19:40,540 --> 00:19:42,917 Now batting, Mel Cowan. 496 00:20:08,770 --> 00:20:11,420 Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. 497 00:20:40,092 --> 00:20:42,403 So, you know, even with the game moving so fast, 498 00:20:42,452 --> 00:20:44,076 it's gonna be tricky to get out of here 499 00:20:44,125 --> 00:20:45,672 'cause of the sellout. 500 00:20:45,822 --> 00:20:48,938 We have a reservation for 8:00 at the Two Seasons. 501 00:20:49,076 --> 00:20:50,723 Should we change it? 502 00:20:51,005 --> 00:20:53,097 Nah, we got time. 503 00:20:56,516 --> 00:20:58,582 We got time. 504 00:21:11,190 --> 00:21:13,859 Now batting, number 22, 505 00:21:13,908 --> 00:21:16,591 Joe Stafford. 506 00:21:29,821 --> 00:21:33,821 synced & corrected by PopcornAWH www.addic7ed.com 34735

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