Original subtitles

Hello, it's Marcus,

Xavier's cousin.

Marcus, yes.

Yes, thank you.

Hey, cousin!

We're at the airport. We're here, man.

I hope you're still getting married!

Ok, great.

No, we're...

It's just the two of us. She didn't...

She didn't come.

I don't know, she changed her mind three days ago.

She just split. We didn't get it.

You know my little brother.

He's a mess.

Don't worry,

Argentina will cure him.

We'll travel around a bit.

It'll be fine, you'll see.

Ok, listen,

we're going to pick up the rental car.

We'll see you tomorrow. Ok?

Ok, take care.

Ciao! Goodbye!

Antoine!

Antoine!

WHERE'S KIM BASINGER?

Hotel America...

Hello.

One single, one double...

No, there's a problem.

His girlfriend isn't here.

She's not coming.

Not coming.

So, we'll sleep in the same room.

What happened to his girlfriend?

She left him.

The same thing happened to me.

How sad.

She left me

two weeks ago.

She left with the kids,

the refrigerator, the TV,

everything.

Poor boy.

- Listen, I'll give you the Suite. - Thank you.

There you go.

Welcome, gentlemen!

- Thank you very much. - Goodbye.

Hello, this is Coralie.

I'm not in right now. Please leave a message.

Goodbye!

Have a good trip!

"In Buenos Aires, seduction and affairs of the heart

"are considered just as important as the Tango and soccer..."

Total bullshit.

"You look at people, you smile, you talk,

"and sometimes touch.

"Women - young and old alike -

"always dress sexily

"or at least try to show off their sensual figures."

This guidebook says incredibly stupid things!

Listen to this:

"To show their admiration and desire,

"men will often use piropos,

"traditionally poetic compliments

"which are usually very vulgar."

"Piropos are sometimes accompanied by car honking..."

This is heavy!

"Men do not think twice

"about following the object of their desire."

How heavy can you get?

"Please note that this chauvinistic legacy

"is going through hard times due to the recent sexual liberation

"and the insolent attitudes

of their female partners.''

You fool! You idiot!

What on earth were you thinking?

What's wrong with you?

Is that how you resolve your problems?

Good Lord! We have a fine clientele.

This is a good hotel.

Do you understand? Good.

People who come here know what they want.

Do you know what you want?

If you did, you wouldn't jump from the 2nd floor.

You don't kill yourself by jumping from the 2nd floor.

- Right? - Right.

What's he saying?

That you don't jump from the 2nd floor of a good hotel.

An anti-inflammatory... An analgesic...

- No... - Yes!

No?

Why not?

Tell him it was the wind.

The wind? The wind? Yes, it's the wind's fault.

Use your head! Use your head!

You know why I understand?

I'm with you. You're not alone anymore.

I know what you're going through, I've been there.

I've been there!

I'm with you, you're with me.

We're blood brothers. You understand?

Blood brothers!

You feel no more pain.

Today is tomorrow.

Think about it.

Today... is tomorrow.

Brothers, Ok?

There you go. This'll make you feel better.

Antoine...

He's right, we should be out having fun.

lt's summer here. We'd be freezing our balls off in Paris.

It's our cousin's wedding, we're together

and you want to ruin everything? You're crazy.

Listen,

when was the last time we did anything together?

I'm happy to be with you.

Antoine...

Antoine...

Hey, Antoine,

maybe you'll meet a cute Argentinean.

Who knows, a pretty little

Luz, or Paula,

or maybe a sweet Amalia...

Come on.

Come on!

Let's go eat an empanada,

with a cerveza, with a chica...

Something with an "A" in it.

What do you say?

When they swing like that,

it rocks me like a lullaby.

Can we go now?

Oh, France! I love it!

I only know how to say three things in French:

"Chateau Richelieu..."

Yes, "Chateau Richelieu".

"Cr�me br�l�e..."

"Cr�me br�l�e"? Very good.

And "Je t'aime..."

- "Je t'aime." - What?

"Je t'aime..." I don't know, like "I love you".

"Je t'aime."

I love you too. I got it!

Have you known your friend for a long time?

Him... your friend.

He's not my friend.

Hello.

He's my brother.

Ah! The two of them are brothers.

Oh, I see.

I love my brother very much.

He's different from other guys.

He's very... how do you say it?

He laughs a lot? He's funny?

Yes, that's my brother for you. He's very funny.

Antonio... Meet the girls.

I'm Paula, pleased to meet you.

How's it going?

Good?

Bad... very bad.

You like Buenos Aires?

- No. - No?

Where've you been?

I don't remember.

I didn't get a word his brother said.

Do you have girlfriends in France?

- Girlfriends? - Yes.

He has a few in Paris,

but not me.

You don't have one?

No, you're lying. It's impossible.

You're pulling my leg, you're way too cute.

You're handsome and elegant.

- I think he's lying. - Yes, he's lying.

Because...

when I see girls...

I want to hang myself.

- You understand? - No.

- What? - Hang myself.

I don't understand a thing.

How do you say "hang yourself"?

- In Spanish? - Not a word...

Cheers!

Cheers!

Hey! How's it going guys?

Very chic, very chic.

The land of love! Champagne! Champagne!

Hang on, one second.

Look, look!

Girls! The best girls in the whole town.

You can't imagine. So beautiful you'll want to die.

Gorgeous, gorgeous.

They'll make your head spin. Look!

Kim Basinger!

Forget about him.

Look, look... Take this.

Gentlemen... Girls, girls!

Where the hell are we going?

Come on, we said we'd have a look.

Maybe we'll have fun together for once.

Where's he taking us?

I smell danger.

Antoine, relax.

Sir, is it far?

No, we're almost there.

Don't worry.

Do you have money on you?

This is Marta.

Everything's cool.

My home is your home.

Champagne? Champagne?

You want to see Kim Basinger?

You want to see her?

You won't regret it.

Look, there're boys tonight!

Hello, honeys!

You like 'em, darling?

Go ahead...

Pick...

You wanted to come. Enjoy yourself.

Well...

Hello.

Hello.

C'mon, have a seat.

Sit down, right here!

Say, you're awfully cute.

Where are you from... Italy?

Spain?

No, I know... German!

No, French.

France! I love France.

Eiffel Tower!

The land of love.

What's your name?

Antoine.

Like "Antonio".

I love your eyes, Antoine.

- And you? - Me?

Luz... like "the light".

No, no, no...

I'm so thirsty.

How about a drink?

Champagne?

I love champagne.

And you? You like champagne?

Yes, you like it too.

Drink up.

Very good. More, more!

Very good.

A piece of fruit?

- No. - Yes, yes.

No, no, no...

Let's sing.

You like to sing?

What's your favorite song?

Your very, very favorite one.

Marvin Gaye!

I love Marvin! He's the best.

Some more champagne?

You'll see, you'll love it.

We're only gonna sing and dance?

We're not gonna make love?

When do we stop this shit?

Let's dance some more.

Very good! Very good!

That was wonderful.

No, no, no...

You like to dance?

Marcus?

Excuse me...

Let's go.

Shit.

Let's dance some more, please.

No, l'm leaving. "Love you..."

Love me... Love everybody!

C'mon. I'm fed up.

What's this crap?

I'm telling you, they thought we were English.

What? What's wrong?

What's this, the bill? Very well.

Girls... rooms...

2,260 pesos!

2,260 pesos!

We didn't see a single tit or ass!

We danced and sang... that's it!

There's a problem here.

Where's Kim Basinger?

Where is Kim Basinger, huh?

Where's Kim Basinger?

They're trying to rip us off for 500 euros!

Let's split.

I want to see the manager.

Are you the manager?

What's going on here?

Are you the manager? There's a problem!

- What? - A problem with the bill.

Let's see...

Two girls, two rooms,

two bottles of champagne,

two fruit platters, four songs...

Marvin Gaye!

Two rooms?

There's no problem with the bill.

- You'll have to pay up. - There's no problem?

There's a big problem!

- You're out of your mind. - Calm down.

This is all backwards!

Calm down.

It's a bargain.

Here, change the bill.

Marvin Gaye, Phil Collins... same price.

- We run? - Yeah...

Subtitles: Julie Meyer

Subtitling: L.V.T - Paris