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1
00:00:46,525 --> 00:00:48,565
Okay, I’ll fire her up.
2
00:00:50,085 --> 00:00:53,725
I see you downloaded the new maps. Cool.
You got any weed?
3
00:00:53,805 --> 00:00:55,725
- What... what are you doing?
- Don’t you have another controller?
4
00:00:55,805 --> 00:00:57,165
No, I meant what are you doing here?
5
00:00:57,245 --> 00:00:59,325
Oh, I got a cousin’s wedding in Germany.
6
00:00:59,405 --> 00:01:01,005
Worked out cheaper
7
00:01:01,085 --> 00:01:02,565
if I stay here a couple
of nights in London.
8
00:01:02,645 --> 00:01:04,045
You know, didn’t think you would, uh...
9
00:01:04,125 --> 00:01:05,685
Oh, shit!
10
00:01:05,765 --> 00:01:09,285
Dude! It was from here, wasn’t it?
Holy mother of...
11
00:01:09,365 --> 00:01:10,925
Shh! Keep your voice down.
12
00:01:11,845 --> 00:01:13,045
What, is Becca sleeping?
13
00:01:13,125 --> 00:01:13,925
Not any more.
14
00:01:15,125 --> 00:01:17,325
Oh... Hello, darling.
15
00:01:17,885 --> 00:01:20,525
Yeah, babe,
do you remember Will_5000?
16
00:01:20,605 --> 00:01:24,925
You know, that guy I play online with?
Well, he’s come to stay for a few nights.
17
00:01:25,565 --> 00:01:29,045
That’s funny. You think I’d remember
one of your friends who I’ve never met
18
00:01:29,125 --> 00:01:31,445
planning to arrive at my flat
in the middle of the night.
19
00:01:31,525 --> 00:01:35,285
Sorry. I kind of, um,
sprung it on Daniel. Yeah.
20
00:01:35,365 --> 00:01:36,365
Right.
21
00:01:36,885 --> 00:01:37,845
Okay.
22
00:01:38,485 --> 00:01:39,845
Welcome to our home.
23
00:01:40,525 --> 00:01:42,205
Thank you, Becca.
24
00:01:42,285 --> 00:01:45,205
And again, sorry. I know it’s kinda late.
25
00:01:45,285 --> 00:01:48,365
No, no... it’s... it’s fine, um...
26
00:01:49,965 --> 00:01:51,645
Why didn’t you tell me?
27
00:01:51,725 --> 00:01:54,605
Oh, look, he just turned up, okay?
I didn’t know he was coming.
28
00:01:54,685 --> 00:01:56,085
What’s wrong with his face?
29
00:01:56,645 --> 00:01:57,845
I don’t know.
30
00:01:57,925 --> 00:01:59,645
It’s the first time I’ve ever met him.
31
00:02:00,725 --> 00:02:02,805
Oh, he’s not gonna need all this.
32
00:02:03,365 --> 00:02:04,605
It’s not just for him.
33
00:02:10,085 --> 00:02:15,085
Subtitles by explosiveskull
34
00:02:16,405 --> 00:02:18,885
You never told me
about the, er...
35
00:02:19,525 --> 00:02:20,725
- The mask?
- Mmm.
36
00:02:22,005 --> 00:02:23,605
Everyone wants to know about the mask.
37
00:02:24,565 --> 00:02:25,965
It's the cheapest one I could get.
38
00:02:26,045 --> 00:02:27,485
I’m saving up for surgery.
39
00:02:28,405 --> 00:02:30,445
So... what... what happened?
40
00:02:33,965 --> 00:02:35,365
I was eight years old.
41
00:02:36,605 --> 00:02:38,205
Mom had been ironing in our trailer.
42
00:02:39,285 --> 00:02:40,165
She left the iron on.
43
00:02:40,925 --> 00:02:43,325
I was standing on a stool,
reaching for the cookie jar.
44
00:02:44,205 --> 00:02:45,245
The stool gives way.
45
00:02:45,725 --> 00:02:48,005
I come down, bring the ironing board
down with me and...
46
00:02:49,045 --> 00:02:50,205
Fuck!
47
00:02:50,885 --> 00:02:53,045
- I’m sorry, man. That’s...
- Well...
48
00:02:54,805 --> 00:02:57,405
At least it didn’t land on my dick.
49
00:02:57,485 --> 00:02:58,485
Right?
50
00:02:59,045 --> 00:03:00,325
Fuck you, asshole!
51
00:03:00,405 --> 00:03:03,685
Ooh, can we just...?
Let’s just keep it quiet.
52
00:03:03,765 --> 00:03:04,725
You saw that, right?
53
00:03:04,805 --> 00:03:07,405
I mean, I emptied a full fucking clip
into this guy, he doesn’t go down.
54
00:03:07,485 --> 00:03:08,445
I mean, in what world?
55
00:03:08,525 --> 00:03:10,565
Do you know what?
I’m gonna try and get some sleep.
56
00:03:11,365 --> 00:03:12,245
Totally.
57
00:03:12,925 --> 00:03:14,365
I am so fucking jetlagged right now,
58
00:03:14,445 --> 00:03:16,845
I’m not gonna be able to sleep
for hours, you know.
59
00:03:18,645 --> 00:03:22,565
You motherfucker!
Suck my dick! Suck it!
60
00:03:24,965 --> 00:03:26,245
I wasn’t sure at first,
61
00:03:26,325 --> 00:03:28,445
but I think that new haircut
takes years off you.
62
00:03:28,525 --> 00:03:29,885
Oh, thank you.
63
00:03:30,445 --> 00:03:34,245
And also, I’d like to officially thank you
64
00:03:34,325 --> 00:03:36,325
for agreeing to share our...
65
00:03:37,245 --> 00:03:38,925
our martial bed once again.
66
00:03:39,845 --> 00:03:40,885
And now...
67
00:03:42,205 --> 00:03:44,325
No, no, no, no, Iain.
I’m not quite ready for that, no.
68
00:03:44,405 --> 00:03:46,485
- Please!
- No, Iain. Soon, darling.
69
00:03:48,405 --> 00:03:51,725
Sorry. Make way!
70
00:03:53,285 --> 00:03:54,845
- Iain!
- I’m sorry.
71
00:03:56,005 --> 00:03:59,805
07700 900843.
Dr. Iain Glennis speaking.
72
00:03:59,885 --> 00:04:01,125
Iain, it’s Sherry.
73
00:04:01,205 --> 00:04:02,885
Oh, hello, Sherry.
74
00:04:02,965 --> 00:04:05,845
How would you and Mrs. G
like to join me and Mrs. S at the club?
75
00:04:06,605 --> 00:04:07,685
Oh, yes.
76
00:04:07,765 --> 00:04:10,045
Yes, I’d like that very much.
77
00:04:10,645 --> 00:04:12,765
Well, great. See you there at midday.
78
00:04:12,845 --> 00:04:14,445
Yes. Goodbye.
79
00:04:15,685 --> 00:04:18,365
- Sherry?
- Yes, short for Sherringford.
80
00:04:19,085 --> 00:04:20,365
Sherringford?
81
00:04:20,445 --> 00:04:22,045
Yes. Sherringford Samson.
82
00:04:23,205 --> 00:04:24,845
He’s just invited me
83
00:04:25,765 --> 00:04:28,005
and the most beautiful woman in the world
84
00:04:28,085 --> 00:04:32,525
to spend the afternoon with him
in his rather exclusive
85
00:04:32,605 --> 00:04:33,925
country club.
86
00:04:35,285 --> 00:04:37,445
Oh, Iain!
87
00:04:38,125 --> 00:04:39,365
- Oh!
- Oh.
88
00:04:39,445 --> 00:04:41,285
I’m just going to pick out my outfit.
89
00:04:44,405 --> 00:04:45,685
We have to clean the whole flat?
90
00:04:45,765 --> 00:04:47,885
Yes. I want it to look nice for Vanessa.
91
00:04:47,965 --> 00:04:50,085
Why would she come in the bedroom?
92
00:04:50,165 --> 00:04:52,205
- I’ll get it!
- Thanks, Will!
93
00:04:52,285 --> 00:04:53,325
Because, you know...
94
00:04:57,765 --> 00:05:00,005
I’m really sorry.
95
00:05:00,365 --> 00:05:03,685
Please, Vanessa, stop apologizing.
I’m used to it.
96
00:05:03,765 --> 00:05:04,805
Okay.
97
00:05:04,885 --> 00:05:06,485
How are you feeling, Daniel?
98
00:05:07,645 --> 00:05:10,725
- You know, not too bad.
- Why, what’s wrong?
99
00:05:13,245 --> 00:05:15,525
I’m sure...
I’m sure I told you about my...
100
00:05:16,405 --> 00:05:17,525
illness.
101
00:05:17,605 --> 00:05:19,765
Oh, right!
102
00:05:20,165 --> 00:05:21,245
God!
103
00:05:21,965 --> 00:05:23,645
And how are you, Vanessa?
104
00:05:24,445 --> 00:05:25,525
I’m okay.
105
00:05:26,765 --> 00:05:28,045
I lost my husband recently.
106
00:05:28,125 --> 00:05:29,685
Mmm. Ash, right?
107
00:05:30,365 --> 00:05:33,525
Daniel’s other best friend.
He sounded like a cool dude.
108
00:05:33,605 --> 00:05:34,805
He was.
109
00:05:35,925 --> 00:05:37,405
I’m just starting to think...
110
00:05:38,365 --> 00:05:40,645
how well did I really know you, Ash?
111
00:05:41,925 --> 00:05:43,565
I found condoms in his wallet.
112
00:05:46,605 --> 00:05:48,645
We hadn’t used condoms
for ages.
113
00:05:48,725 --> 00:05:50,125
Well, maybe they were old ones.
114
00:05:50,765 --> 00:05:52,325
I still don’t know where his car is.
115
00:05:53,965 --> 00:05:55,525
And now this thing with his phone.
116
00:05:56,245 --> 00:05:59,245
I can’t get into it.
His code was always 2019.
117
00:05:59,325 --> 00:06:01,165
- Yeah.
- The same as yours.
118
00:06:01,245 --> 00:06:04,245
- Yeah, it was always that.
- The year Blade Runner’s set. Very cool.
119
00:06:04,325 --> 00:06:07,245
But since I got it back from the hospital,
that code doesn’t work.
120
00:06:09,405 --> 00:06:11,205
Oh, well, you know.
121
00:06:11,285 --> 00:06:15,565
Maybe it caught a virus from being
at the hospital.
122
00:06:17,885 --> 00:06:20,365
- That’s not funny, Daniel.
- That is not cool, bro.
123
00:06:21,645 --> 00:06:24,725
Is there a way of getting into a phone
without knowing the code?
124
00:06:24,805 --> 00:06:26,885
Well, even the FBI
can’t hack those things, Vanessa.
125
00:06:26,965 --> 00:06:29,565
Anyway, I have got some
excellent carob bars.
126
00:06:30,765 --> 00:06:34,125
Yeah! They’re zero calories
and taste amazing.
127
00:06:35,325 --> 00:06:36,725
Please, Dad.
128
00:06:37,005 --> 00:06:40,445
It’s a lovely day.
Your mother wouldn’t be very happy
129
00:06:40,525 --> 00:06:42,165
if I took you to a dark cinema, would she?
130
00:06:42,685 --> 00:06:45,485
- But it’s a classic!
- Maybe if it was The Hunger Games,
131
00:06:45,565 --> 00:06:47,045
but not Texas Chainsaw Massacre.
132
00:06:47,125 --> 00:06:48,205
You’re 11.
133
00:06:53,205 --> 00:06:55,365
Put that in the dishwasher.
134
00:06:55,445 --> 00:06:56,525
Hello?
135
00:06:57,445 --> 00:06:59,805
Okay. Well, I’ll get there
as soon as I can.
136
00:07:00,405 --> 00:07:03,005
Um... We’re going to have to
take a trip into work.
137
00:07:03,085 --> 00:07:04,605
But it’s Sunday.
138
00:07:04,685 --> 00:07:07,245
Well, I’m sorry, young lady,
but the alarm has gone off.
139
00:07:07,325 --> 00:07:09,725
Oh, so I’m not allowed to see
an acclaimed horror film,
140
00:07:09,805 --> 00:07:12,685
but I am allowed to be a security guard
for a health insurance firm?
141
00:07:12,765 --> 00:07:14,565
Can you just...
142
00:07:15,965 --> 00:07:17,485
...grow up?
143
00:07:19,245 --> 00:07:20,765
I wish we had a nicer car.
144
00:07:20,845 --> 00:07:22,925
What? This is an Audi, my darling.
145
00:07:23,005 --> 00:07:24,885
Yes, and it’s bashed to pieces.
146
00:07:24,965 --> 00:07:26,565
Accidents can’t be helped, can they?
147
00:07:26,645 --> 00:07:29,565
Yes, they can. You just need to
take more care, darling.
148
00:07:30,525 --> 00:07:33,645
I... I told you.
I was swerving to avoid a squirrel.
149
00:07:35,965 --> 00:07:38,085
So, where is Ash buried?
150
00:07:39,205 --> 00:07:40,565
He was cremated.
151
00:07:41,645 --> 00:07:46,565
I, um... I haven’t scattered the ashes
yet. I just... I’ve not felt ready.
152
00:07:46,645 --> 00:07:47,765
I get that.
153
00:07:48,285 --> 00:07:49,565
So where did you guys meet?
154
00:07:50,645 --> 00:07:53,565
Funny enough, right here, in the garden.
155
00:07:54,325 --> 00:07:57,765
Daniel and Becca’s barbecue,
three years ago.
156
00:08:00,565 --> 00:08:01,725
Down here?
157
00:08:01,805 --> 00:08:03,005
Uh... yes.
158
00:08:03,605 --> 00:08:06,125
It was a summer evening.
159
00:08:06,805 --> 00:08:09,125
He was wearing his Indiana Jones
T-shirt.
160
00:08:09,205 --> 00:08:10,325
Raiders?
161
00:08:11,045 --> 00:08:12,565
Uh... I guess.
162
00:08:13,325 --> 00:08:16,365
Vanessa, you should totally
scatter his ashes in the garden.
163
00:08:16,445 --> 00:08:17,685
Oh, Will!
164
00:08:18,205 --> 00:08:20,325
You heard what she said.
She’s... she's not ready.
165
00:08:20,405 --> 00:08:22,805
No, he’s right. I should.
166
00:08:23,325 --> 00:08:24,685
Do it today!
167
00:08:24,765 --> 00:08:27,205
Oh, it’s a bit... Let’s not rush her.
168
00:08:28,045 --> 00:08:29,485
Could we do it today?
169
00:08:30,365 --> 00:08:34,605
No. I think you need to get permission
from the council before you...
170
00:08:35,285 --> 00:08:36,725
scatter ashes in a...
171
00:08:36,805 --> 00:08:38,205
For God’s sake, Daniel!
172
00:08:38,285 --> 00:08:39,685
Look, of course we can.
173
00:08:39,765 --> 00:08:41,685
I’ll drive you back
and we can get the urn.
174
00:08:42,485 --> 00:08:43,605
Okay.
175
00:09:01,645 --> 00:09:02,805
He is dead.
176
00:09:08,165 --> 00:09:09,525
- Jesus!
- Hey.
177
00:09:09,605 --> 00:09:12,565
You scared the shit out of me.
Why did you suggest that to Vanessa?
178
00:09:12,645 --> 00:09:14,245
Sorry. I was just trying to be nice.
179
00:09:14,645 --> 00:09:18,405
Well, we’re gonna be scattering
his ashes where he landed.
180
00:09:18,885 --> 00:09:19,885
Shit!
181
00:09:19,965 --> 00:09:21,405
I didn’t think. Forgive me.
182
00:09:21,925 --> 00:09:24,125
Just... think in future.
183
00:09:24,205 --> 00:09:25,365
Will do.
184
00:09:25,445 --> 00:09:29,125
So, what are you doing here?
Checking there’s no sign of him?
185
00:09:30,245 --> 00:09:31,605
I’m just... just seeing
186
00:09:31,685 --> 00:09:33,445
- if I’ve missed anything.
- Hmm.
187
00:09:34,165 --> 00:09:35,845
Like, did you ever notice that?
188
00:09:37,645 --> 00:09:38,925
Oh, fuck!
189
00:09:40,805 --> 00:09:43,685
If there’s any footage,
I’ll need to delete it before he sees it.
190
00:09:44,485 --> 00:09:47,445
I’ll create a diversion.
So, what’s he like?
191
00:09:47,525 --> 00:09:48,645
A bit weird.
192
00:09:49,165 --> 00:09:51,085
Sometimes I see him
going through our bins.
193
00:09:52,125 --> 00:09:53,085
Plus there’s...
194
00:09:54,365 --> 00:09:56,285
Cameras.
195
00:09:59,605 --> 00:10:01,285
Maybe he’s not in.
196
00:10:02,045 --> 00:10:03,805
Hello! Anybody home?
197
00:10:03,885 --> 00:10:05,885
- We’re not Jehovah’s Witnesses!
- Will!
198
00:10:06,485 --> 00:10:08,325
See?
199
00:10:12,805 --> 00:10:14,165
What do you want?
200
00:10:14,245 --> 00:10:15,725
Hi.
201
00:10:16,325 --> 00:10:17,925
Sorry, I’ve completely forgotten
your name.
202
00:10:18,005 --> 00:10:19,125
It’s Paul.
203
00:10:19,205 --> 00:10:20,605
Paul, yeah.
204
00:10:20,685 --> 00:10:23,725
Um, my drainpipe at the back of ours
has come loose
205
00:10:23,805 --> 00:10:26,645
and it looks like someone
might’ve tried to break in.
206
00:10:26,725 --> 00:10:28,605
Mmm. And maybe he fell into the garden.
207
00:10:29,845 --> 00:10:32,965
You have a security camera
pointing at our wall
208
00:10:33,045 --> 00:10:35,285
and I just thought you might have
some footage of what happened.
209
00:10:35,365 --> 00:10:36,645
I might.
210
00:10:38,325 --> 00:10:40,205
Right. Is there...?
211
00:10:40,285 --> 00:10:42,685
- Can we come in and...
- What’s wrong with your face?
212
00:10:45,645 --> 00:10:47,325
- I was eight years old.
- Mmm?
213
00:10:47,885 --> 00:10:50,845
Mom had been ironing in our trailer.
She left the iron on.
214
00:10:50,925 --> 00:10:53,005
I was standing on a stool,
reaching for the cookie jar.
215
00:10:53,085 --> 00:10:56,405
The stool gave way, took the ironing board
down with me and...
216
00:10:57,525 --> 00:10:59,045
And... what?
217
00:11:01,005 --> 00:11:03,525
And... the iron fell on my face.
218
00:11:03,605 --> 00:11:04,845
Oh, right.
219
00:11:05,885 --> 00:11:09,085
As long as you’re not some kind of
masked burglar
220
00:11:11,845 --> 00:11:13,125
Wait here.
221
00:11:15,205 --> 00:11:16,525
I’m going to get changed.
222
00:11:16,605 --> 00:11:18,525
Can you... can you just stop
saying things?
223
00:11:18,605 --> 00:11:19,645
What?
224
00:11:19,725 --> 00:11:21,645
He might’ve fallen
in the garden!
225
00:11:21,725 --> 00:11:24,085
Yeah, but that is what the footage
is gonna show, right?
226
00:11:26,365 --> 00:11:28,165
On what day
do you think it happened?
227
00:11:28,765 --> 00:11:30,165
Let me think...
228
00:11:31,485 --> 00:11:34,165
- Could we try May the 16th?
- Mm-hm.
229
00:11:34,285 --> 00:11:35,725
About 1:45 pm?
230
00:11:37,285 --> 00:11:39,005
Is that an Xbox One?
231
00:11:39,085 --> 00:11:40,565
Yes!
232
00:11:40,645 --> 00:11:43,725
If you’re a serious gamer, you should
really consider getting the PS4.
233
00:11:43,805 --> 00:11:45,725
The Xbox One is a superior machine.
234
00:11:45,805 --> 00:11:48,525
For pure gaming, it’s not,
and their network is a turd.
235
00:11:48,605 --> 00:11:50,525
Has PlayStation
got backwards compatibility?
236
00:11:50,605 --> 00:11:52,085
No, because we don’t live in the past.
237
00:11:52,165 --> 00:11:53,685
You’re just a PlayStation fanboy.
238
00:11:53,765 --> 00:11:56,485
And you’re just a Microsoft pussy
with a Microsoft dick.
239
00:11:56,565 --> 00:11:58,365
- Right, get out!
- Let’s not overreact...
240
00:11:58,445 --> 00:11:59,525
No, you too. Out.
241
00:11:59,605 --> 00:12:01,285
But we haven’t looked at the footage yet.
242
00:12:01,365 --> 00:12:03,965
No, and you and Boardwalk Empire here
never will.
243
00:12:04,045 --> 00:12:05,885
- Apologize, Will.
- No fucking way!
244
00:12:05,965 --> 00:12:07,885
Get out! I’m calling the police on you.
245
00:12:08,645 --> 00:12:10,485
Out! Move! Thank you.
246
00:12:20,930 --> 00:12:22,850
Oh, the owners are here
to greet us.
247
00:12:22,930 --> 00:12:24,730
I think they're the staff, Iain.
248
00:12:24,810 --> 00:12:26,410
Really? Okay.
249
00:12:27,810 --> 00:12:29,690
Darling, I do wish you’d worn
your matching trousers.
250
00:12:29,770 --> 00:12:31,770
I know, but moths had eaten
the gusset, darling.
251
00:12:36,570 --> 00:12:38,290
- Iain.
- Ah, Sherry.
252
00:12:38,810 --> 00:12:39,890
Hello.
253
00:12:40,730 --> 00:12:43,650
And your fragrant wife.
254
00:12:43,730 --> 00:12:45,370
Yes. This is Annette.
255
00:12:46,090 --> 00:12:48,370
- Hello... Sherry.
- Hello.
256
00:12:49,090 --> 00:12:51,890
Come and meet Mrs. S.
And the Frobishers are here and the-
257
00:12:51,970 --> 00:12:53,290
Excuse me, Mr. Samson.
258
00:12:53,890 --> 00:12:55,650
You’ve trodden in something.
259
00:12:55,730 --> 00:12:57,130
No, I don’t think I have.
260
00:12:57,810 --> 00:13:00,290
Oh, bedknobs and broomsticks!
261
00:13:00,370 --> 00:13:02,290
- Make your excuses and go and clean them.
- Yes, I’m sorry.
262
00:13:02,770 --> 00:13:04,490
I’ll go and find a hose.
263
00:13:04,570 --> 00:13:06,530
Oh, what?
264
00:13:07,770 --> 00:13:09,490
- 07700 800...
- It’s me.
265
00:13:09,570 --> 00:13:11,330
Okay, you need to get here right now.
266
00:13:11,410 --> 00:13:12,970
I can’t, Daniel. I’m at a function.
267
00:13:13,050 --> 00:13:14,650
There's footage of what happened
in the garden!
268
00:13:14,730 --> 00:13:17,570
My neighbor has a security camera
pointed right where it happened.
269
00:13:17,970 --> 00:13:19,050
Have you been arrested?
270
00:13:19,130 --> 00:13:21,210
No, but if he sees it then we both will.
271
00:13:21,890 --> 00:13:23,450
What am I supposed to do?
272
00:13:23,530 --> 00:13:25,810
Right. I need you to go round there
273
00:13:25,890 --> 00:13:27,930
and you need to steal the hard drive.
274
00:13:28,010 --> 00:13:30,250
How? Using my invisibility cloak?
275
00:13:30,330 --> 00:13:31,810
There must be something you can do.
276
00:13:31,890 --> 00:13:32,970
Ugh!
277
00:13:39,010 --> 00:13:41,210
It's always left to bloomin' muggins!
278
00:13:45,250 --> 00:13:46,490
I think Ash was having an affair.
279
00:13:47,170 --> 00:13:49,090
Ash? An affair? Don’t be so silly.
280
00:13:50,450 --> 00:13:52,490
Oh, I think, um...
281
00:13:52,570 --> 00:13:53,810
Huh? Oh.
282
00:13:55,290 --> 00:13:57,210
Well, he certainly takes after his dad.
283
00:13:57,530 --> 00:14:00,690
Don’t you, Mr. Stinky Winky?
284
00:14:06,130 --> 00:14:07,690
I miss you so much.
285
00:14:13,770 --> 00:14:16,050
I just want a little bit of you to keep.
286
00:14:33,010 --> 00:14:34,010
Fuck!
287
00:14:34,810 --> 00:14:35,810
Fuck.
288
00:14:58,610 --> 00:14:59,650
Hey.
289
00:15:01,570 --> 00:15:03,290
- You okay?
- Yes.
290
00:15:04,490 --> 00:15:05,490
Yeah.
291
00:15:06,090 --> 00:15:07,370
Got Ash.
292
00:15:14,010 --> 00:15:17,170
- Oh, hello.
- Who are you?
293
00:15:17,250 --> 00:15:21,690
I’m from the council,
sir. Just here spraying for pests.
294
00:15:21,770 --> 00:15:24,330
- What kind of pests?
- You never know, sir.
295
00:15:24,410 --> 00:15:26,610
There's a big increase in...
296
00:15:27,330 --> 00:15:28,930
in woodlice there.
297
00:15:31,050 --> 00:15:33,730
- Can I come in, sir? May I?
- Yes.
298
00:15:34,490 --> 00:15:35,810
Thanks a million.
299
00:15:42,450 --> 00:15:43,690
Stay close.
300
00:15:49,130 --> 00:15:50,770
Oh, right, yeah. Okay, good.
301
00:15:51,370 --> 00:15:54,570
Now... don’t be scared, okay?
302
00:15:54,650 --> 00:15:56,130
- I’m not.
- Well, good.
303
00:15:56,210 --> 00:15:57,290
What if someone broke in?
304
00:15:57,370 --> 00:16:00,010
You said animal rights protestors
hate Mr. West.
305
00:16:00,090 --> 00:16:01,850
No one’s broken in.
306
00:16:01,930 --> 00:16:04,210
Okay, hide.
307
00:16:11,410 --> 00:16:12,530
Get down!
308
00:16:17,850 --> 00:16:20,490
- Linda!
- Michael, what are you doing?
309
00:16:20,570 --> 00:16:22,570
We thought you were
an animal rights protestor.
310
00:16:22,650 --> 00:16:25,210
Oh, right.
And who are you?
311
00:16:25,290 --> 00:16:27,650
Well, my wife’s away,
so I had to bring Beth with me.
312
00:16:28,410 --> 00:16:29,890
Well, nice to meet you.
313
00:16:30,410 --> 00:16:31,570
Are you his mistress?
314
00:16:31,650 --> 00:16:33,530
No! This is my daughter.
315
00:16:34,090 --> 00:16:35,370
- Oh, right.
- What are you doing here?
316
00:16:35,450 --> 00:16:37,770
Well, Mr. West asked me
to come and meet him here
317
00:16:37,850 --> 00:16:41,130
to show him my latest invention,
the office bracelet.
318
00:16:41,210 --> 00:16:43,290
Mr. West wouldn’t call a meeting
on a Sunday.
319
00:16:43,370 --> 00:16:46,810
Oh, he was very insistent, and he told me
to wear my yellow dress.
320
00:16:48,610 --> 00:16:53,410
Okay, well, let’s go and sort these lights
out before Mr. West gets here.
321
00:16:54,490 --> 00:16:56,930
Mr. West is trying to have sex with her,
isn’t he?
322
00:16:57,370 --> 00:16:58,810
I don’t know what that means.
323
00:17:05,530 --> 00:17:06,970
This is where we met
324
00:17:07,610 --> 00:17:09,290
and where he proposed to me.
325
00:17:10,530 --> 00:17:12,810
And now it’s where he’ll stay forever.
326
00:17:16,970 --> 00:17:18,210
Goodbye, Ash.
327
00:17:19,810 --> 00:17:21,410
Oh, God!
328
00:17:25,970 --> 00:17:27,890
Why... why is he like that?
329
00:17:29,210 --> 00:17:33,090
Well, the lid mustn’t have
shut properly. I guess condensation?
330
00:17:33,890 --> 00:17:35,050
But he...
331
00:17:35,130 --> 00:17:38,130
Well, he can’t just sit there on the lawn,
looking like a...
332
00:17:38,810 --> 00:17:40,010
- Turd.
- Will!
333
00:17:41,450 --> 00:17:44,370
I think it’s gonna rain later.
334
00:17:44,450 --> 00:17:47,210
You know, that will, um, help to...
335
00:17:48,370 --> 00:17:49,450
evenly
336
00:17:50,810 --> 00:17:52,490
distribute... him.
337
00:17:52,890 --> 00:17:54,690
Oh, God!
338
00:17:55,530 --> 00:17:57,490
How do you evenly distribute a turd?
339
00:17:59,250 --> 00:18:00,730
You said you’d get that fixed.
340
00:18:01,570 --> 00:18:03,410
Oh, yeah. No, I called someone,
341
00:18:03,490 --> 00:18:06,930
but they said they couldn’t
get it done for a couple of weeks.
342
00:18:07,010 --> 00:18:08,530
Well, somebody’s tried to break in.
343
00:18:08,610 --> 00:18:10,410
No, it’s squirrels. I told you.
344
00:18:10,490 --> 00:18:12,650
Becca, even if you wanna find out
if someone’s broken in,
345
00:18:12,730 --> 00:18:13,970
he won’t show you the footage.
346
00:18:14,450 --> 00:18:15,850
I’m sorry. I’m sorry, what footage?
347
00:18:15,930 --> 00:18:18,690
- He’s just...
- The camera up there
348
00:18:18,770 --> 00:18:19,810
would’ve filmed everything,
349
00:18:19,890 --> 00:18:21,330
- but there’s no use going next door.
- Why?
350
00:18:21,410 --> 00:18:23,730
Because we already asked.
He said he wouldn’t show us,
351
00:18:23,810 --> 00:18:25,890
stupid fucking Xbox fanboy.
352
00:18:27,490 --> 00:18:29,450
- Yeah, well, I’m going round right now.
- Wait!
353
00:18:29,530 --> 00:18:32,610
Do you know what, I think he said he was
going on holiday. He’s not gonna be in.
354
00:18:35,450 --> 00:18:38,450
Sorry, sir. Could I have
a glass of water, sir?
355
00:18:40,010 --> 00:18:42,090
Oh, couldn’t have it from the tap,
could I?
356
00:18:42,170 --> 00:18:43,810
I don’t like the flavor of the bottles.
357
00:18:44,770 --> 00:18:46,050
Smells like dog shit in here.
358
00:18:56,210 --> 00:18:57,810
You’re not welcome in here.
359
00:18:57,890 --> 00:18:59,850
Okay, you heard him.
Let’s go, Becca.
360
00:18:59,930 --> 00:19:01,690
You have a camera
pointed at my property.
361
00:19:01,770 --> 00:19:03,370
Do you want me to have you arrested
as a peeping tom?
362
00:19:03,450 --> 00:19:05,570
I'm not a peeping tom!
I'm keeping the neighborhood safe.
363
00:19:05,650 --> 00:19:07,330
- Then show us the footage.
- Fine.
364
00:19:07,410 --> 00:19:10,450
But your mate Phantom of the Opera
was very insulting.
365
00:19:10,530 --> 00:19:12,570
- Yeah, sorry about him.
- Whoa!
366
00:19:15,810 --> 00:19:18,330
Council, spraying for bugs.
367
00:19:18,930 --> 00:19:20,890
- They not been to yours?
- No.
368
00:19:20,970 --> 00:19:23,290
I’ll be round
to yours after here, madam.
369
00:19:23,370 --> 00:19:25,890
I know. Why don’t you go back
and look after Vanessa
370
00:19:25,970 --> 00:19:28,130
and I’ll stay here and take care of this.
371
00:19:28,210 --> 00:19:30,250
Can you just show us
the footage, please?
372
00:19:30,330 --> 00:19:34,050
I’ve already isolated the recording
from the day in question.
373
00:19:35,370 --> 00:19:37,170
Oh, yeah. That looks too grainy.
374
00:19:37,970 --> 00:19:40,610
I think this has been a waste of time.
I think we should... Let’s go, Becca.
375
00:19:40,690 --> 00:19:43,930
It’s 720p HD with a two-megapixel camera.
376
00:19:44,010 --> 00:19:45,650
It is not grainy.
377
00:19:50,370 --> 00:19:51,410
Whizz it on a bit.
378
00:19:56,330 --> 00:19:57,410
Right, yes.
379
00:19:57,490 --> 00:19:58,930
Oh, Seamus, ye...
380
00:19:59,650 --> 00:20:01,090
Ye ficking idiot, so!
381
00:20:02,130 --> 00:20:05,290
I have to pop out to me van.
I've forgotten something.
382
00:20:08,850 --> 00:20:10,410
I don't fucking believe it!
383
00:20:11,410 --> 00:20:12,770
You were right.
384
00:20:12,850 --> 00:20:13,890
Squirrels.
385
00:20:16,330 --> 00:20:17,930
See? Yeah, I told you.
386
00:20:18,010 --> 00:20:19,290
Bloody pests.
387
00:20:19,610 --> 00:20:21,290
- Thank Christ for that.
- What do you mean?
388
00:20:21,370 --> 00:20:22,930
Now we can’t claim on the insurance.
389
00:20:23,690 --> 00:20:25,290
No, yeah, well, I meant, you know...
390
00:20:25,370 --> 00:20:29,650
Thank Christ we weren’t targets
of dangerous thieves.
391
00:20:30,570 --> 00:20:32,490
So a squirrel blocked my lens
392
00:20:32,570 --> 00:20:34,890
whilst its mate vandalized your drainpipe?
393
00:20:35,530 --> 00:20:39,010
- Yeah. Yeah, that...
- that makes sense to me.
394
00:20:45,930 --> 00:20:47,210
You want me to
395
00:20:47,290 --> 00:20:49,170
spread it around a bit with my shoe?
396
00:20:53,050 --> 00:20:54,250
No.
397
00:20:58,610 --> 00:20:59,810
Bit more.
398
00:20:59,890 --> 00:21:01,570
Bit more. Thank you.
399
00:21:06,170 --> 00:21:07,250
Hello.
400
00:21:07,970 --> 00:21:09,010
Where have you been?
401
00:21:09,530 --> 00:21:12,330
You’ve missed all Sherry’s stories
about playing billiards with Alex Higgins.
402
00:21:12,410 --> 00:21:16,290
Iain! Mrs. G told me
about your little accident.
403
00:21:16,370 --> 00:21:18,250
There’s a lot of deer
in Barlow Lakes’ grounds.
404
00:21:18,330 --> 00:21:21,370
Yes, my diagnosis is one of them has a...
405
00:21:22,290 --> 00:21:24,570
a bad case of deer-o-rrhea.
406
00:21:26,210 --> 00:21:27,650
Diarrhea.
407
00:21:28,170 --> 00:21:29,410
Very good, yes.
408
00:21:30,530 --> 00:21:33,330
I should look into getting you two
membership here.
409
00:21:33,410 --> 00:21:34,970
With Kenny West and me as sponsors,
410
00:21:35,050 --> 00:21:36,090
you’ll be a...
411
00:21:36,170 --> 00:21:37,650
a shoe-in!
412
00:21:44,450 --> 00:21:46,370
- Finally.
- There you go.
413
00:21:46,450 --> 00:21:49,010
Nothing to be scared of. But, you know,
if you can’t handle a dark office,
414
00:21:49,090 --> 00:21:52,290
then I don’t think you can handle
Texas Chainsaw Massacre.
415
00:21:57,250 --> 00:21:58,250
Kenny?
416
00:22:00,170 --> 00:22:01,490
Kenny?
417
00:22:13,010 --> 00:22:14,090
Kenny!
418
00:22:14,170 --> 00:22:15,330
Kenny, no!
419
00:22:19,570 --> 00:22:21,570
Mr. West committed suicide.
420
00:22:22,290 --> 00:22:23,570
Nope.
421
00:22:23,650 --> 00:22:25,810
That’s autoerotic asphyxiation.
422
00:22:28,667 --> 00:22:33,667
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