Original subtitles

( whistles )

* Some say I'm just a kid *

* But I stand tall like a pyramid *

* One day I'll be mythic *

* Read about it in hieroglyphics *

* Ah-ee-ah-ah-oh

* It's written in the stars, I'm who I'm gonna be *

* I'm takin' on the world this time *

* It's written in the stars of all that I can be *

* I feel the power in my heart *

* It's written in the stars *

Khensu: All right, listen up.

We have a very important mission. I--

Need us to smash the bad guys!

- Hyuh! Hyuh! - Khensu: No...

- Aiyee-uh! - I needyouto pay attention!

I can pay attention

andpractice smashing bad guys

at the same time!

Hyah! Hyah! Hyah! Hyah! Hoo-yah!

Hmm. You were saying?

Pharaoh Yosira is to attend a peace summit

with two other galactic leaders

at the Gentle Palms Space Station and Resort..

Shemustconvince them to join us

in the fight against Octavian.

Octavianwishes he could handle my moves.

Hyah! Ooh-yah!

Whoo! Aaah! Hyah!

Ahem!

Here's where things get tricky.

Intel says someone at this summit

has already joined Octavian,

and they plan to kidnap Yosira.

- Any idea who the defector is? - Cleo: Hyah!

Unfortunately, no. But wedoknow--

We need to find out who they are!

And! Then! Smash! Them!

Eeeyah!

Uhh! Yahh!

Yes, but if we're wrong,

we could cause even more defections to Octavian's side.

Plus, there is Yosira's safety to think of.

( grunting ) Yosira isn't seriously considering

going to this thing, is she?

Khensu: She has to.

The summit is too important to cancel.

What if everyone justthoughtYosira was there?

( gasps ) I get it!

Someone could go undercover as Yosira!

Ooh, political intrigue issosassy!

Cleo: Great idea.

And as the only legit royal princess here,

I'll do it.

I was born for this mission!

Well, you definitely got the sass factor covered!

You know it, girlfriend.

Both: Hyah! Hyah-hyah!

Duh-wuh!

Khensu: Out of the question!

Cleo is far too important to me--(clearing throat)--

to the fight against Octavian.

Khen-suuuu! I'm important to you?

( baby talk ) Is someone a big softy-wofty underneath all that grumpy-wumpy?

- ( Khensu shrieks ) - Nope.

Grumpy-wumpy all the way through.

It's a good plan.

But Cleo,

you are far too impulsive, unfocused,

and generally in love with breaking things

- to pose as the Pharaoh. - Cleo: Ohhh!

- I can totally do it, you guys! - No!

Now we need to find the right candidate

- to go undercover as Yosira. - Uhh!

How are we gonna do that without anyone learning what we're up to?

( sing-songy ) With...auditions!

Khensu: Ahem! Thank you all for coming to audition

for this exciting new play about PYRAMID.

Today we're casting the role of Pharaoh Yosira. Lights!

( sighs ) This is a complete waste of my skills,

royal bloodline, and sass.

( robotic voice ) I am Pharaoh Yosira.

My royal duties include diplomatic relations

and wearing jazzy hats.

( beeping )

- ( buzzer ) - Akila: Next!

( hip-hop backing track playing )

* Yo, yo, Yosira is my name

- * And I'm a Pharaoh * - All: * Pharaoh!

* My people need me like a bone needs marrow *

- * Marrow! - * I dress real fly

- * Fly - * And my pad's mega-cool *

* I read a lot of books, but I don't go to school *

* What?!

- ( mic feeds back ) - ( giggles ) Yeah.

( laughing ) Wow!

- That was just, uh... - ( buzzers )

...no. Next!

( high voice ) Galactic peace...

- in our time is... - ( Brian, Akila groan )

Next!

( Cleo sighs )

Wow. Everyone isterrible.

And he was the best one.

Oh! Pharaoh Yosira! What are you doing here?

Administrant Khepra filled me in,

so I snuck away to see for myself.

It was kind of fun.

( giggles ) I've never really snuck anywhere before.

Ha! You little Pharaoh rebel, you!

Why aren't you up there?

You're the only one I trust to fill in for me.

Thanks, but Khensu doesn't think I sh--

I believe in you, Cleo.

And I also believe that if we are to triumph over the forces of evil,

we must stand together, united.

( alien babbling )

- ( Dennis screams ) - ( all gasping )

- ( gasps ) - Aaaah! - Gahhh!

Cleo! I already told you that--

( imitating Yosira ) I believe that if we are to triumph over the forces of evil,

we must stand together, united.

( cheers, applause )

Wowzers! Ha!

Just-- Squeeee!

I'm still not convinced this is a good idea!

Well, someone disagrees with you.

Right, Pharaoh Yosira?

Um... ( clears throat )

Omigosh! Yosira's, like, inthe building?

( gasps ) It's really her!

( robotic voice ): Is asking for a lock of hair too creepy?

Oopsy. Maybe I shouldn't point out where Yosira is

when there's an evil plot to kidnap her.

Heeyahh!

- Hyah! - Akila: Hyah!

Deep breaths, everyone!

We need to keep it together!

Keep. It. Together!

I just wanted to say good luck.

And I can't wait to see the play.

Akila; Auditions are over!

You don't have to go home, but you can't stay here!

- Move it, people! - ( all groaning )

Khensu, I know you have your doubts about Cleo,

but this summit is crucial.

That's why I'm coming, too.

I don't think that's a good idea.

- ( Cleo groans ) - I'll go in disguise and stay under guard.

That way I can be there to help Cleo

with the finer points of interplanetary diplomacy.

Which will free me up to unmask the defector

and, ya know, smash them into little traitorous bits.

Ohh! Leave the unmasking to Brian, Akila, and I.

Your mission, with Yosira's help,

will be to make a compelling argument

and then engage in discussion and debate.

You just want me to debate and discuss? I can do more than that.

Yes, but if you don't convince the other leaders to join us,

Octavian will win,

and evil will rule the Nile Galaxy forever.

( Octavian laughing )

Great. Ilovea nice low-pressure mission.

Arghh!

Cleo: The Gentle Palms Resort.

So swanky!

And this dress is totes awesome, Yosira!

You wear it well, Cleo.

It's good to be all princessed up again.

Whoop! ( giggling )

The royal staff is not for twirling.

But it does add mad drama to that ensemble.

- ( Khensu growls ) - What? It does!

There will be no twirling, mad drama,

or smashing of any kind.

But that's kind of my thing. Ya know?

Like how your thing is being cranky?

Yes, and my thing is being a great friend

and Brian's thing is saying boring stuff.

There's nothing boring about quantum nonequilibri-- Aah!

Pharaoh Yosira.

Welcome to the Gentle Palms Resort.

I am the manager,

and your humble servant, Chostipher.

Nice digs ya got here, Chosty.

Um, Chostipher. ( grunts )

- ( kissing ) - Ooh!

Please, step through the scanner.

No powered weapons are permitted.

- Wow! - Ooh!

Chostipher: For additional safety,

the other leaders have not been allowed

to bring their entourages.

Great! That'll make keeping Yosira safe so much easier.

- Ahem! - Uh, I mean,

keepingmesafe,

because I am Yosira,

and Yosira likes safety

and speaking in third person.

We were told that Her Majesty

would have time to freshen up before the other leaders arrive?

Oh, but they are already awaiting you, Your Majesty.

( whispers ) The other leaders areearly.

Something isdefinitelyup.

We haven't prepared.

At least you read the briefing package on alien customs, right?

If you're willing to believe I did, then yes.

Relax, Khensu. I totally got this.

Don't slouch. Hold your head up.

- Higher! Not that high! - ( grunting )

Walk like you're gliding! You're supposed to be a Pharaoh!

I was training to be a Pharaoh in ancient Egypt, remember?

This walk was good enough back then!

Things are different now! Glide!

Her Majesty Pharaoh Yosira!

( whispers ) Good luck, Cleo!

- We've got your back. - Try not to get kidnapped!

Uhhh...

( sighs ) OK.

Allow me to present, from the Shapka Alliance,

Prime Minister Nuvillo!

( grumbling )

Uh, many splendid tidings of the morning...time, Nuvillo.

Buddy.

( whispers ) Shapkas don't shake hands.

They view it as a great insult!

Oh! Um...

If this is how Pharaoh Yosira

intends to conduct herself,

things are not going to go well.

Ohhh!

Your Majesty,

this is Queen Phoebus of Macaboli.

Uh, hail and well met and forsooth...

Ooh! Bring it in and hug it out, girl!

This diplomatic summit's gonna besomuch fun!

Aaah! A weapon!

( chittering )

- Huh? - Phoebus: Um, no.

Igzy's my emotional support animal.

Oh! But I see Your Majesty's broughtherpet as well.

( baby-talking to Khensu )

- ( Khensu growls ) - Ah, yes!

Of course.

Khensu's a good kitty!

( gritting teeth ) Good kitty.

Me-ow!

Someone get this vile beast of me!

- ( Cleo giggling ) - Oh, Igzy! No!

That could have gone worse.

- Not sure how, but... - Khensu: Aah!

That Nuvillo definitely seems like the defector type.

So...slimy.

Andwe should keep an eye on Phoebus.

Anyonethatpositive

is definitely hiding a dark side.

Except me, obviously.

If you ask me, they totally bought--

- Heeeyahh! - ( glass shatters )

Oh, dear.

Ha ha!Sosorry.

Pharaoh Yosira has-- uh--uh--allergies!

Yes, allergies. That's a perfectly reasonable explanation

for what just happened here.

Apologies.

I'll have all flowers removed from the hall

before tonight's dinner.

Khensu: We need to get to work.

Akila and I will infiltrate the staff

- and recon the resort. - That sounds awesome!

I'll figure out who's fixing to betray Yosira.

Right after we get to the room

and study the Galactic Diplomacy Code

and itsmanyiterations.

Ooh! Lucky ducky!

Galactic codes are so detailed and intricate!

- Fun! - Yay. Fun.

Khensu: To give you context for the Galactic Diplomacy Code,

you need some history.

Khensu, you know history gives me angry legs!

In the 200th century--

No. Wait. Let's go further back.

Ugh! This would be a lot easier

if I could just use the staff!

- Hyah! Hyah! Heeyah! - Cleo?

Khensu, perhaps I can give this a try.

Why don't you go grab us a snack before dinner?

- Ahem. Of course. - Hyah!

Hopefully we can make her less Cleo

and more you.

( Cleo shouting battle cries )

Let's see. Pharaoh 101.

Rubbing foreheads is the interplanetary greeting of peace.

Shapkas are afraid of windmills,

and the currency on Macaboli is compliments.

How do you remember all this stuff?

Hours of study. Somany hours.

You should try to get out more.

Come hang with us at the Academy.

Administrant Khepra thinks it's too dangerous.

When you're the Pharaoh,

you don't get to do what you want very often.

It might sound silly, but I...

want adventure.

( scoffs ) It's not silly.

I felt the exact same way back in Egypt.

Cleo...

would you...

show me some of those moves with the royal staff?

Ha ha ha ha!

I'm back with-- Aaah!

Sweet move!

Time for a battle pun--

something like, "Too bad you can't stick around."

- Cleo! - Hyah! Hyah!

I know it's a staff, but you can do more with "stick."

OK, um...

stick this in your ear!

- Hmm... - What is going on here?!

It's not a curtain rod! This is outrageous!

Hey, Khensu! Cleo was just showing me some of her moves.

Totes awesome. I've never felt so alive.

- Hahh! - Hyah!

Cleo! Yosira was supposed to turnyouintoher.

But you've turnedher intoyou!

Both: Totes!

We're out of time.

Put in your earpieces.

Yosira, you'll stay here under guard.

You'll hear what Cleo hears

and be able to feed her any information she needs.

There's a lot riding on this, Cleo.

You have to broker an alliance with one leader

while avoiding getting kidnapped by the other,and--

We don't know which is which.

I know this is serious and all,

but I. Am. Pumped!

( groans )

Ohhh...

( transmitter beeps )

( grumbling )

Yosira, darling,

I know you want our help in the fight against Octavian,

but Macaboli has held a neutral position for centuries.

As have the Shapka Alliance.

If you want our support,

we have to know...

( gasps )

Cleo: Huhh!

Hmm? Hmm.

Uh, um, allow me, Prime Minister.

- ( Nuvillo slurping ) - ( giggles )

- Mmm. - Oh!

You have mastered the Shapka custom

of drinky-helpy. Mmm.

So, what's in this for us?

Oh. Well, um,

according to the interplanetary code thingy, um...

You are invoking Measure 198B,

demanding their loyalty.

I'm invoking Measure 198B,

demanding their-- uh, uh, your loyalty.

Phoebus: What?!

That measure was agreed to ages ago!

Things are different now!

( grunts )

Huh!

Both: Uhh...

Hyah!

Ehh...

Grrr...

Uh?! Oh.

Ho ho! Delightful!

Your Majesty knows we Macabolians love the mirror game!

Yes. ( laughs ) I know that--that thing.

Now tell me. Why should we

honor the measure and fight with you?

Because, um-- Great question.

Aha. I'm sure the answer will come to me...

- Yosira: Ow! - ( crackling )

- ( feedback ) - Oww! - Are you all right?

You don't seem yourself.

Of course I'm myself! Who else would I be?

Ha ha ha-- Aaah!

( whispers ) What's going on?

Do you know who the defector is?

Do you always sweat this much?

I've lost contact with Yosira!

Without Yosira's guidance,

I fear this mission is doomed!

- We have to abort. - No!

This is our only chance to figure out

who's trying to kidnap Yosira.

I'll have to wing it.

( munching )

My dear friends,

this charade has gone on long enough.

Someone here has already madean alliance...

- with Octavian! - ( all gasp )

And I believe that the "someone"

who is on Octavian's side...

surely must be...

Aw, crud. It's Chostipher.

- Wh-What? - Whoa! What?! - Twist!

Pharaoh Yosira,

if you would please step this way.

Not a chance, Chosty!

I'm afraid I must insist.

- Get her! - ( thugs grunting )

- Khensu? - Smash the bad guys!

Uh-yahh! Ha ha ha, ha ha!

Heeeyahh! Huhh!

- ( Phoebus whimpers ) - Nuvillo! Phoebus! Take cover!

Heeyahh!

- Oh! - Hyah!

Heeyah!

Sorry you can'tstickaround!

( all shout battle cries )

- Thank you. - ( Khensu shrieking )

- Whoa! - Ah-yeah!

- ( grunting ) - Chostipher's getting away!

No, he's not! Heeyahh!

Hyahhh! Huhhh!

Aaaah! Huh!

( panting ) Whoa!

Huhh! Hah! Hyahh! Hyahh!

( battle cries continue )

You guys fight really well for waiters!

Chostipher only hires ex-pirates! Hyahh!

Thug 2: We're part of a "Cons to Pros" program!

That's very nice of him!

( thud )

( Cleo grunting, panting )

Whoa!

Chef turnyouinto soufflé!

( whimpering, grunting )

( grunting )

Yahh! Hyahh! Aah!

( grunting )

( beater whirring )

Uh...huh?

( both grunting )

- Yahh! - ( laughing )

Chef beat!

Chef puree! Ha ha ha ha!

Pureed is not how I'm going out!

- Uhhh! - ( Cleo panting )

Haahh!

- ( rattling door ) - Cleo: Whoo!

( Chef whimpers )

Chef cold and lonely. Ohhh.

( Cleo panting )

( whooshing )

I'm truly sorry, Pharaoh,

but I have to take you to Octavian.

- Yosira: Aaaah! - Cleo: Ha ha!

- Hyahh! - Ohh!

- Aahh! - Hmm?

Stick 'em up, Chostipher!

Sweet "stick" line, Yosira!

I had a good teacher.

So if she's...

well, then, you are-- who are you?

I'm Cleopatra...

and this is my fist!

Wait! I didn't want to do this, I swear!

Octavian said he'd disintegrate the resort

if I didn't kidnap Yosira for him.

I did what I had to do to protect my people...

whatever the consequences.

- Chostipher! - ( whimpers )

I offer you PYRAMID's protection.

You're doing what, now?!

It is the right thing to do.

Where would we be if we all acted like Octavian?

But if youever step out of line again,

- I will really stick it to you. - ( bones cracking )

You're lucky I'm not the real Pharaoh.

You wouldn't be getting off so easy.

( clears throat ) Yes.

Well, um, I do hope you've enjoyed your stay.

If you have a moment, please give us a five-star review online.

I think we both know that's not gonna happen.

Nuvillo: You knew how dangerous this was,

but you came anyway.

You have the support of the Shapka Alliance.

Andthe Macaboli.

I thank you, but this fight won't be easy.

Octavian is a formidable warrior.

As are you and Cleo.

It will be my honor

to fight alongside you both.

( all cheering )

Pharaoh Yosira?

I wanted to make sure you were comfortable

after our, uh...

Our adventure? I'm fine. Thank you, Khensu.

I'm sorry you were put in danger.

I guarantee it won't happen again.

Good night, Your Majesty.

( whoosh, clank )

He's gone.

Ready to continue your training?

Totes!

Ha ha!

( both shouting battle cries )

( music playing )