All language subtitles for scrubs.s08e03.My Saving Grace.eng

J.D.: With all the bureaucracy
in a hospital,

sometimes you have to bend the rules
to help a patient.

Unfortunately, the new
Chief of Medicine didn't like it.

And she was everywhere.
Patient rooms...

- What'cha doing, rock star?
- Nothing, I'm just doodling.

That's not right.

...work stations...

You need to wear a bell.

...even the O.R.

Thanks for letting me observe, fellows.

Come on.
You got five more surgeries today.

Tumor's down by his bean bags.

We should probably take that out.

It's like, all of a sudden,
this hospital is a police state.

I mean, next thing you know,

they're going to be charging doctors
for candy at the gift shop.

They do charge doctors
for candy at the gift shop, Elliot.

Really? Then why does
Johann always let me...

Because he wants to make you his wife
and bring you back to Estonia.

Aah! That's why he's always asking me
if I'm comfortable around oxen.

Elliot, I'm trying
to talk to you about Maddox

and how we can't
work the system anymore.

Correction.

You can't work the system anymore.
I can.

For instance, I just got Mr. Tillman
back there into a clinical trial

that has a cut-off age of 30.
He's actually 35.

But if anyone asks, Mr. Tillman,
you are how old?

Thirty-five.

I forgot to mention
that it is a clinical trial for head injuries.

He hurt his head.

The point is that I'm still able
to give top-notch care to my patients,

- whereas you are not.
- Thirty-five.

You know why? I am a much,
much better doctor than you.

Ooh! Look at that big lollipop.

I wouldn't know whether to lick it

or whether to just lift up my skirt
and spank myself with it.

- Elliot!
- It's free candy!

Dr. Reid, I thought you gave
a great endocrinology lecture today.

Even though some of the other interns

think you go off
on personal tangents too much.

- Who?
- I shouldn't say. Denise.

Anyway, I was hoping you could assign
me some more interesting procedures.

Rein it in, Katie.

Just go place a central line
on Mr. Clark.

Thanks.

Wow!

The butt-kissing
isn't even the worst part.

I feel like Katie will do anything
to get ahead, you know?

I'm this close to freezing her out.

Just like I did Dr. Simmons.

Yeah, what's your deal with her?

Hello, she wears the exact same thing
as me every day.

- Yeah, we're talking about you, skank.
- Nice dress.

Veronica, I have no idea
how you're doing this, but I will find out.

- MR. TILLMAN: Thirty-five.
- Hi, Mr. Tillman.

You ready to go to work?

Hello, Mr. Rosell.

You can call me Pat.
This is my daughter, Christine.

So, Pat, I understand
that you have multiple sclerosis

and you're interested
in being put on interferon.

I held off as long as I could,

but now the hand spasms
and the nausea are pretty bad.

Plus, I'm color blind.

Well, we're gonna go run
a whole bunch of tests.

J.D.: And get some coffee.

Damn it! Now I have to go change.

So how you holding up?

Cleaning's an art.
My mop was my paintbrush.

J.D.: Oh, no. It's the first time I've seen
the Janitor since he was fired.

I have to seem like I care.
Think of the saddest thing you can.

Turk's dead. Turk's dead. Turk's dead.
Turk's... Oh, my God,

what if something really happened
to him? I'd be lost.

Stop thinking like that. Turk's fine.

Turk's fine. Turk's fine. Turk's fine.
Turk's fine.

J.D., the Janitor got fired.

No, it's okay. He knows.
He just doesn't care.

See, in his mind, I'm the bad guy
in our relationship.

Even though, if he stopped
to think about it for a minute

he would realize I never did
a thing to him that he didn't deserve.

- You locked me in a water tower.
- You wrote on the wall.

- You destroyed my scooter, Sasha.
- You know I hate Wednesdays.

You haunted my pediatric patients.

You didn't wear the shorts
that my imaginary wife made for you.

Janitor, I just heard, I'm so sorry.

What?

What's up?

Oh, come on.
How's that even possible?

I can't do this all on my own

No, I know

I'm no Superman

I'm no Superman

MR. TILLMAN: Thirty-five.

Hey, thanks for placing
that central line for me.

I'm just still not great at the procedure,
you know?

Look at you.

Watching over the I.C.U. Like a proud
lioness looking out over her jungle.

Elliot, stop.

Oh, my God! That wasn't a real "stop,"

that was a "keep going because
I'm actually loving this" stop.

- Wasn't it?
- Maybe.

I've never gotten one
of these before. This is so exciting.

I'm gonna leave before I ruin it.

- Great job on Mr. Clark's central line.
- Thanks. It was super easy.

Okay, Mr. Rosell,
let's get you on some interferon.

So it can start interfering
with that pesky MS of yours.

Are you making fun
of my multiple sclerosis?

Sorry, I was just
trying to lighten the moment,

it won't happen again, I promise.

J.D.: Interferon sounds like the name
of a robot that always gets in the way.

So we brought you some pills for your
pain and your nausea. Dr. Dorian?

- J. D! Pills.
- Right. Pills.

Take the red one now for the pain.

- Mr. Rosell took the red pill.
- Yeah, we told him to.

If he can't see colors,
how did he know which one was red?

He's just another addict
scamming us for meds.

Frick on a stick.

Looking for something?

Yes, my cloak of invisibility,
so that I can avoid conversations

with soulless dictators
such as yourself.

Unfortunately, it's really hard to find

because, as the name suggests,
it's invisible.

All right, Dr. Cox.
Ridiculous name by the way.

If you're looking for your patient,
Mr. Tillman,

my guess is he's probably on a bus
somewhere screaming "35!"

See, I bounced him
from his head trauma trial

because I learned that somebody
was lying about his age.

Hmm. See you.

I got to get rid of this Maddox.

Honest to God, she is...
Why aren't you listening to me?

Because of that.

- That scone looks good.
- Oh, yeah?

We should have sex later.

How did you get from that image
to that thought?

I'll tell you tonight.

Just bring home a scone
and a Hawaiian shirt.

Mama's heating up.

Donny! Do my free muffins for life
include scones?

- Nope.
- Damn you, God.

I'm getting rid of Maddox. Who's in?

I'm in. Ever since she fired me,

I've been moping around my apartment
making barking sounds.

I'm not crazy.
I just need some human interaction

and the barking makes the neighbors
yell "shut that damn thing up!"

Then I can go over there
with a bottle of Scotch

and apologize for Rusty,
my imaginary Akita.

The only downside is that by the time
Lady, my girlfriend, gets home,

I'm too drunk to talk to her,
much less make love.

You've never pictured me
as an organism that has sex, have you?

- We have not.
- No.

- I understand.
- Is Dr. Maddox really that bad?

She's like you,
only smart and on the ball.

That must suck.

- What?
- Admit it.

You miss having me
as the Chief of Medicine.

Bob, I'll gladly admit to anything that's
true, no matter how embarrassing.

For example, I've always wished
that I could carry a child inside of me

and, you know, birth it.

But I'll never admit
to missing you, Bob. Ever.

Rusty. Heel.

Donny, I'm going to need

the double-chocolate blaster
as a pick-me-up.

Maybe another.

Hello, girls.

Come on, sit down, Katie, sit down.
It's time to set you straight.

We better do it fast, because,
man, you're annoying.

Why do you think you can talk to me
like this? You're just a nurse.

Okay, A, I'm a lioness.

B, who the hell do you think
runs this place?

The nursing staff
has already turned on you.

Why do you think you were assigned
75 bowel disimpactions this week?

I don't care. I'm good at it.

Plus, this morning
I found a silver dollar.

Everyone's on to you, missy.

Pretty soon,
you're gonna get called out.

You're lying to us. You took the red pill.
You can see colors.

You know, I am sick and tired
of lowlifes like you

trying to come here and score
pain medication off of us, okay.

You make us care.

And then because you're worried we're
gonna see through your little plan,

you don't even laugh at our jokes.

Actually, the interferon joke
was sort of funny.

You're damn right it was, Pat, okay?

Well, this time,
no one's getting off easy.

My cousin is a cop.
And not a good cop either, a rogue cop.

- Christine, it's you, isn't it?
- Hold on, hold on, Elliot.

You ever watch The Shield, Pat?
Do you happen to get FX, Pat?

Because you're gonna get
Michael Chiklised in the head.

He's the orange guy in Fantastic Four,
that's coming down on you.

J.D., look at her hand. It's in spasm.

You're the one with the MS. Right?

I don't have any insurance and my dad
just thought that since he did...

Look, we'll go, all right?

If you could just not tell anyone,
we'd be very grateful.

J.D.: Elliot and I knew
what we had to do.

Okay, Pat. You have MS

and you're not leaving here
until you get your medication.

Thank you.

Do you know
how grateful people would be

if you showed them
even a little common decency?

Please, this place is so competitive.

No one looks out for each other here.

Yeah. This Maddox
is so damn sketchy,

I guarantee you we'll find something
in these files.

Hurry, up man.
I don't want to get busted.

Now, listen there, Grape Ape,
I only invited you to help me

because it never dawned on me

that you'd get all panicky
over a little breaking and entering.

Actually, I'm not. See, this stuff
has become so mundane to me

that I've created a character who's
terrified about going back to prison.

And through him,
I hope to feel, once again, the old rush.

You carry on.

Good. 'Cause
I can't go back there, man.

Not after what they did to Johnny.
Oh, Johnny. He was the best.

I wish you'd known him.
Those guards worked him over good.

They shanked him with a shiv.
And they shivved him with a shank.

Over a pack of smokes. Johnny, you
were too beautiful for this world, man.

Hope you're king of the next.

Johnny! Johnny!

Hey, guys.
Listen, I popped in here earlier

and noticed not Mr. Rosell
but his daughter showing signs of MS.

They were lying to get her the drugs.
Can you believe it?

- I'm angry. I want to shake these things.
- Hard.

Anyway, I played the bad guy for you
and I tossed them out.

I love playing the bad guy.

I'd even wear black scrubs
if they made them.

Do you even know what people
are calling you around here?

I know I don't care.

Because I wrote the worst one
on this piece of paper.

"Sausages, sausages,
and more sausages"?

That's actually Turk's grocery list.
But you do care, don't you?

Katie, if you keep going
down this road,

eventually people will come after you.

Hey, you!
How do you think the Board would feel

if I could show them proof

that you're on the take
from a medical supply company?

I'm guessing they'd be thrilled

since I'm rolling that money back
into the hospital's budget.

Please. Stop handcuffing us.

You're making it impossible for us
to help our patients.

Does anybody else feel that way?

Great, now I don't have to tell you
each individually

that I don't give a rat's hairy ass.

It's a huge time-saver. Thanks, gang.

And eventually, Katie,
everyone here is going to hate you.

Look, Carla, I appreciate this
whole mother hen thing...

- Lioness.
- Lioness thing

that you've got going on here.
But I don't need your help.

Look. I know you think
you're fine on your own,

but in order to survive here you need
to surround yourself with friends.

Look over there.

I can count on three out of four
of those people.

I trust them with all my secrets.

You guys, Carla had the nastiest
sex dream about that cafeteria lady.

Watch how uncomfortable she gets.

- Nice earrings.
- Thank you.

You're welcome.

How are we gonna get rid of Maddox?

Janitor, would you like to get
your useless ideas out of the way first?

Well, thank you, Perry.

Off the top of my head
I'd go reindeer stampede.

Astronaut attack.
Barbed wire chandelier.

Photoshop. Poisonous sushi.

When you said "Photoshop,"

did you mean use Photoshop
to create an incriminating picture?

No, I meant we build
an actual photo shop.

Or a chain of photo shops.
We each manage one.

We let time pass.

Eventually Maddox has to have
her film developed.

She comes in, we all hop out,
yell, "Surprise"

and beat her to death with pool cues.

I'm going to go ahead and apologize,

because it's my fault
that we're backtracking.

It's okay. I'm not mad.

You guys, let's face it.
Maddox is untouchable.

J.D.: Not true.
I know how to get rid of any woman.

Dr. Maddox, I love you.

Excuse me for just a second.

Where are you going?
I'm telling you that I love you. I...

Okay.

J.D.: Too mean, psyche.

Admittedly, getting rid of Maddox
is a Board issue.

But, as you all know, I recently retired
to become a full-time mom.

J.D.: Crap. We forgot Jordan's
retirement party last week.

I hope we weren't the only ones.

- I really should have gone to your party.
- You think?

Afternoon power walk coming through.

Why don't you guys just get him
to help you?

He has so much dirt
on all the Board members

they'll do whatever you want.

She's right, Perry. Let's roll.

Big Cat? I need you.

If you come with me to Dr. Kelso,
I won't talk to you.

There it is.

Hey, Johann. Give me some chocolate.

Johann, you slut!

These puppies?
They pay for themselves.

- Katie, what you don't realize...
- What are we doing here?

- Are you setting her straight?
- I'm trying to.

- Look, Katie, what you don't realize...
- May I cut in?

Go ahead.

My rules for getting by here

are the same as my rules
for getting by in Mexico.

One, don't drink the water.
Two, party till you drop.

Three, everything is negotiable.

So you want me to go coerce
the Board into firing Dr. Maddox.

I'll tell you what,
I'll think about it over a muffin.

- Donny.
- Dude.

We need an answer now, Bob.

Fine. I'll do it. If you tell me
you miss having me as Chief.

- So much, sir.
- So much. I missed your smell.

Not you two. Him.

You know, you hurt my feelings earlier.

In my defense, you are a soulless
creature from the netherworld

who doesn't really have feelings.

Thank you, Donny,
but I'll fight my own battles.

You want Maddox gone,
just tell me you miss me.

Fine. But I can't do it in front of people.

Everybody out. Go!

Actually, I think I'm going to need
Dr. Reid and Dr. Dorian here

to bear witness.

Barbie, Newbie. Back in.

Calm down. There's like 23 people
back in that supply closet.

J.D.: And then we saw
something amazing.

Dr. Cox said something nice
to Dr. Kelso.

When you were the Chief,
you were a jackass and a nightmare

and I hated you a great deal.

That's a good start.

But I always sensed,

well, I always sensed that you
were burdened by the job

and it wasn't necessarily
who you were as a person.

And, every once in a while,
you showed a shred of humanity,

plus you did manage
to look the other way a couple times.

That was pretty good.

So, for all that stuff, Bob,
yeah, I miss you.

- Thank you.
- You're welcome.

Everybody back.

Look, Katie, I've seen all kinds
of people come through this place,

tall, short, gay, straight, smart, weird.

The point is,
this childish self-centered attitude

you keep throwing everyone's way
is nothing new.

You know what's really
driving me crazy?

You keep acting like you know me.

Don't bother with the sob story.

I've been here a long time.
I've heard it all before.

Really? Because my dad died
when I was six,

and to cope, my mom drank herself
through most of my childhood.

No one ever did anything for me.

I've always had to do it for myself.

- Oh, Katie.
- I know.

Heard it!

Me, dead mom. J.D., dead dad.
Elliot, emotionally abusive parents.

Dr. Cox, emotionally and physically
abusive dead parents,

which he may have killed.
No one's sure.

Look, Katie, now that you're here,

it doesn't matter what crap
you have in your past.

All that matters
is that you leave it there.

Because this hospital
is your home now.

And these people are your family.

And I can tell you they will love you
unconditionally if you let them.

But if you don't, they... Check that.

We will eat you alive.

Hey, Frank! My favorite board member.

Say hi to your wife for me.

Oh...

Do you remember that trip
we took to Thailand together?

You still keep in touch
with that hermaphrodite you nailed?

What was his name? Lou.

J.D.: The rest was predictable.
They fired Maddox.

Oh! So this is where the party is.

It's okay. Go on celebrating.
I don't care.

I mean, sure, I spent the
last three months building a life here.

Buying a condo,
finding a school for my kid,

having sex with Mickhead.

That doesn't have to end, baby.

Oh, yes, it does, Walter.

You shouldn't have to strangle me
to keep your erection.

I have needs.

Anyway, you all think that you've won,

but they're just going to replace me
with someone exactly like me.

Because nothing ever changes.

People don't change,
relationships don't change,

and the medical system
will never change either.

But you guys, go ahead and have fun
until the new me gets here.

It should be a great couple of days.

J.D.: And then poof! She was gone.

And I like to think we proved
Maddox wrong those next few days.

We found a way
to work around the system...

Thanks.

Here's the medicine, Mr. Rosell.
I hope that helps.

A relationship evolved.

- Good morning, Bob.
- Perry.

It just goes to show you
that with a little help,

anything can change, even interns.

Dr. Reid, I'm not the one that placed
that central line the other day.

I just took credit for it.

- I'm not gonna do that anymore.
- Good.

Any chance you could show me
how to place one of those things?

Let's go.

And action.

Oh, man, those guys, the screws.
They worked him over good.

They shivved him with a shank,
in the yard of the big house.

And they shanked him with a shiv.

Just 'cause he was up the river.

J-boy. The big J.

I thought I saw him, man.

He's always in here.

Johnny. Oh, Johnny.