All language subtitles for The Kid 2000

I'm sorry. I can't seem
to find my purse.

I must have ten of them.

Can you just
ring mine first, please?

There's someone
ahead of you, sir.

I usually keep my change in my little change
bear, but... That's almost interesting.

How much is hers?

5.26.
Just add it on, please.

Hold on, hold on. If it's not in this one,
it'll be in another one.

That'll be 9.65.
Thank you very much.

How sweet. You didn't have to do that for me.
I didn't do it for you.

Check some bags
next time.

jerk.

How can i help you, governor?
Some dirtbag...

Dirtbag...
From the attorney general's office...

Had dared to mention
the word "jail."

Waaah.

Waaah!

Somebody call the "waaambulance"!
What? What did you say?

Governor, do you know
what the number one killer...

Of politicians under the age of 60 is?
No.

Self pity. Governor, i'll be more than
happy to help you out of this mess...

That you so willingly
seem to have stepped into.

But you ought to do something.
What's that?

Stop crying.
I'll try.

No, i mean right now.
You're giving me a headache.

Excuse me, folks,
anything more to drink?

Do y'all have any
single-Malt scotch?

Sure do.

So, what do you
do for a living?

You wanna tell me
about it?

You know,
comfort of strangers and all that.

No.

Oh. Must be something
on the internet.

Or finance.

genetic engineering,
maybe, huh?

I'm an image consultant, okay?
Okay.

So you sort of
troubleshoot for folks?

You know, give 'em makeovers
when they need revamping, right?

Right.

Hey, look,

I'm flying to I.A. To start an
anchor job in the local news,

And i do not think that it's an
accident that i'm sitting next to you.

I see. So the cosmic purpose of our
meeting is for me to give you free advice.

What do i get out of it?

We don't know yet.
But i'll owe you.

If i do it, will you shut up?
Quiet as the dead.

Your hair's too big, your brows are too dark,
your nails are too long...

And your foundation's
too orange.

Your perfume's too sweet.
It's the news, honey, not the prom.

I like your eyes...
Oh. Thank you.

Bluer.
Try the tinted contacts.

But only when you're
anchoring or in I.A.

When you're on assignment, take them out.
What about my accent?

I'm always being warned
to stop saying "y'all."

Don't ever stop saying "y'all."
Your "y'all" is your trademark.

Say "y'all," and you'll be
promoted in six months.

Say "y'all" with a smile,
you'll be famous in 12.

Well...
thank you.

You're welcome.

Now, will you please
shut up?

All right, let me have him.
Hello, your honor. How are you?

Good. Thank you.

Define "not exactly alone."

Your honor,
was this mannequin inflatable?

You know if the press...

Dodged one bullet.

Listen, this is all
gonna blow over.

Hey! Did you see the...

The...

Yeah.

twelve cream pies are on their
way over to the stadium.

Bob riley expects you
in the owner's box at 3:00.

Amy will meet you there.
And why are you wearing a yellow tie?

Janet, how could you know i'm wearing
my yellow tie? You can't even see me.

I can hear the stress
in your voice.

Whenever you're stressed,
you wear the yellow tie,

Which makes you feel all-Powerful,
so you're probably gonna yell at me,

Which i'm not in the mood for,
so don't.

Nice tie.
I am not stressed.

There is nothing wrong
with me.

I just didn't get enough sleep last night.
Can i have today's work, please?

Take your phone off.
You're with a human now.

I did the ones and twos.
There's a three, a four.

I flagged the five in your mail.
There's an eight on your desk to sign.

And there's a ten
standing in your office.

Why did you let him
in my office, janet?

He threatened me
with a machete.

He's your father, russ.

Wait 60 seconds and come in and
tell me i'm late for something.

I hate you.
Fight fair.

That's a nice photo of you and al de niro.
Robert de niro.

It's a nice photo of you
and robert de niro.

Well, it would be,
except that's al pacino.

Oh.

So, dad,
what can i do for you?

Did you get the check
i sent over this morning?

Yes, yes, i did.

But i didn't ask you
for a check.

I asked you to come over
and help me lift a few things.

well, time is money, dad,

And my time is worth
a lot more than a mover's,

So i'm afraid the check
is gonna have to do.

Your sister and her family are coming
over for dinner tomorrow night.

You haven't seen your niece
and nephew in a long time.

Uh, you may want some of those
things in the attic. Like what, dad?

Some more of my childhood memorabilia?
You never know.

How many times in the last 20 years
that you lived in that house...

Have i ever asked you
for anything, hmm?

Anything at all?

Um, you're late...
for a very big meeting.

Dozens of irate and highly important
people are clamoring for you.

There is pandemonium,
i'm sure, somewhere.

And you really must go...
right now.

Good luck with the move, dad.
Let me know how it goes.

Call fred and see how the market closed.
Check the nasdaq. Bye.

that's perfect.
You look brilliant.

Completely
and utterly gorgeous.

Don't look at me.
Look out there.

Have we signed
a new client?

We made a bet. I make him look handsome,
i get a free hot dog.

You're going to starve.

Not a chance.

thank you.
My pleasure.

Just don't share it with jerko.
No way.

Watch your cholesterol, hot dog boy.
Let me have that for you.

Hey, i worked hard
for that!

Amy, those hot dogs
will kill you.

Besides,
we're about to have lobster in cream sauce.

I don't want lobster in cream sauce.
I want hot dog in mustard sauce.

Please stop biting
your nails, amy.

Nail. I only bite one.
Why do you care anyway?

I care because
you work for me.

When you bite your nails,
you're advertising weakness.

Really?
Advertising weakness with one little nail?

What's this advertise?
Nice.

Hi, mike. Is he in?
Waitin' for you.

Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.

Hello.

Hello.

I haven't seen you in a couple of days.
How have you been?

Fine. Now can we go in? No.
This is the bit where you ask me.

We're very late.

I don't have time to...
Go on. Give it a whirl.

Hi, amy.

How are you doing?

Fine.

We're really late.

hey, the cavalry
is here!

Russ duritz
to the rescue!

Here to save
my sorry behind.

Josh, look after him.

Good luck.
Yeah.

Hi. I'm josh,
mr. Riley's assistant.

If you need anything...
I do.

I need you to go up in the bleachers and
find me a dozen 8- To 12-Year-Old kids.

Eight boys, four girls.
Five white, four latino, three black.

Have 'em back here in three minutes.
Okay.

I need to use
your hi-8 for this one.

So why is everybody
busting my chops?

And the way
i see this thing,

It's just a little
misunderstanding.

okay, bob, let me see
if i can explain to you...

How other people
see this little thing.

You see, to joe baseball fan
out there,

You're the guy that promised
you would give five percent...

Of each ticket sold this season
to establishing a baseball

Camp for inner-City kids.

You're also the guy that gave pictures to the
press of kids actually attending this camp,

Which, in fact,
does not exist.

Yet. I was intending to get around to it,
uh, eventually.

Ah.
I am a very busy guy.

no, bob, you're not
a busy man.

See, what you are
is a "stoopid" man.

A very stupid guy who only
played mr. Charitable...

Because you wanted to suck
up to city council...

So they'd build you a
brand-New baseball park.

But guess what.
Bye-Bye, ballpark.

Hello, jail.

So what's your big plan?

How do you feel about
chocolate cream pie?

Why? She gonna feed the kids cream
pie to get me out of this mess?

No. The kids are gonna feed you cream
pie and get you out of this mess.

Huh?
Bob,

Prepare to be pied.

i deserve it!

more pie in the face!

Bob, the press
is gonna eat this up.

amy, what do you think?

Amy? Amy?
You want to know what i think?

I think there's something
very creepy about all this.

Amy, amy,
i swear to you...

I will make sure that the editing of
this tape is handled tastefully, okay?

I'm sure you will.
No, i promise.

We didn't do anything wrong today.
No.

We did the right thing by our client,
bob riley. I love him.

Russ, today we shamelessly
exploited innocent children...

Just to help some crook
with his cash flow problems.

Are you gonna finish this
last piece of yellowtail?

Russ, you should be concerned about this.
You're turning 40 in...

Thank you so much for bringing that up.
And you're not at an age...

Yes, we both are.

We can't go
around anymore

Talking about what we're going
to be like when we grow up.

We are up.

Is that it?
Yeah.

You finished?
Yeah, i'm finished.

Good.

Toshiya, if you get called
a jerk four times...

In the same day,
does that make it true?

What, only four?
Did you get up late? Excuse me.

I'm asking toshiya.

Just four times, a pattern.
It have to be five times to be a fact.

Thank you very much. You see?
There is hope. Jerk.

Thank you.

Yo, pedro, make sure
this gets in the trash.

Yes!

That was fantastic! I can't believe you
just did such a... fantastic thing!

Me neither.

I must be
really stressed out.

Probably still in there.

You are not going
dumpster diving...

To look for that stinky,
fish-Encrusted tape!

You're right.
I shouldn't go in there.

I'm wearing a $2,000 suit.
Come on. I'll give you a boost.

Come on, come on, come on.
Distract yourself.

Honor your instincts.
Look at the moon.

Look at it.
What? Look at what?

Look.

Isn't it lovely?
It's big, it's beautiful,

It's revolving around the earth,
proving once again...

That the universe does
not revolve around you.

It's worth a look,
if you ask me.

Are you looking?

I looked.
Look again!

Okay! Amy...

Quit fooling around,
all right? I looked.

Can we go?

Come on, grumpy.
Hey, will you stop?

I stopped.

I want to show you something.
Tell me if you think this is cute.

Oh! Look at the moon!
It's so big and round,

And when i look at it,
i'm all perky and excited!

And no one would ever know
that i'm almost 30! Ooh!

What do you think?

Cute or just stupid?

You know, russ,
just when i think i've seen the worst,

That there's no possible way
you could be more of a jerk,

You outdo yourself.

And then,

Just when i'm about to leave,
you do something.

Like tonight,
when you threw that tape away.

Then i get the tiniest,
briefest glimpse of the kid in you.

That's when i decide to hang
around for five more minutes,

See what happens next.

Bye.

Janet, i want you on the phone to the alarm
company first thing in the morning, okay?

There is no way anybody should
ever get inside those gates.

Ever! As a matter of fact, get 'em on the
phone right now, and you tell them...

It's 3:00 a.M. Janet,
i don't care if it's 3:00 in the morning.

They're supposed to be a
24-Hour security service, okay?

I want the sensitivity
set on ten.

I want electrocution.
I want charred flesh. Do you understand?

Write it down, janet.
"Charred flesh."

Write it down!
It was probably just some neighborhood kid.

I don't know why
you're so upset.

I'm not upset. I'm just mad.
Okay. Mad, not upset.

You know, maybe we should get
a new security company, okay?

Uh-Huh.

I want rottweilers.
I want big, scary rottweilers.

I want the guy who trains the rottweilers
to be afraid to come over here, okay?

I want a moat with lava.
"Moat with lava."

Trolls with that?
Evil ones?

No, janet. No trolls.

Hello? Uh, russ, it's dad.
Hold on a second, janet.

honey, i'm so sorry.
I know i asked earlier,

But, um, it'd be nice
to have you here for dinner.

I know joanne and the kids
love to see you.

And, uh, well, if your
schedule opens up...

Janet, i am going to bed.
Good idea. Me too.

I do not wish to talk to you or anyone else
on this planet for the next three hours.

Guess what.
Neither do i. Good-Bye.

"Rusty."

Dad, you are really
gettin' weird.

hey!

Hey!

Hey, stop! Stop!
Come back!

Come back here! Hey!

Gotcha! Ow! Ow!

Hey! Hey!

hey! Hey!

get outta there!

look out, you idiot!

Move it, you jerk!

Hey!

Hey!

Hey!

Hey!

Hey!

™�

™�would you like to ride in my
beautiful balloon ♪ uh, good evening.

Uh, a kid just...

Ran in here a moment ago,
and, uh...

Any of you see anything?

™�we could float among
the stars together... ♪

Can any of you
see anything?

™�for we can fly ♪

'Cause this kid who, uh,
was just here...

™�up, up and away... ♪

He...
See you later.

hey! Officer!

™�the world's a nicer place
in my beautiful balloon ♪

™�it wears a nicer face... ™�

Uh-Uh.

Good morning, doctor.

I'd like to get right to the point,
if you don't mind.

I've got a meeting
in ten minutes.

You're entitled
to a 50-Minute hour.

Thank you,
but i only require a five-Minute hour...

Or however long it takes you
to write a prescription.

I see.

We should talk about this.
Why don't you sit down?

No, thank you.
I don't want to sit down.

It all starts
with sitting down.

You sit down and then
before you know it,

Twelve years has gone by,
and you're still talking about...

The time you saw your
mother naked in the shower.

You saw your mother
naked in the shower?

No! I'm just saying
i'm happy to stand, okay?

Look, i-I don't want
therapy.

I don't need therapy.
Why do you feel that way?

Because i'm not like the other
nutballs that roll through here, okay?

I don't have a smoking problem.
I don't have a drinking problem.

I don't have a closet full
of ladies undergarments.

Sit down, mr. Duritz,
and tell me what the problem is.

No, you don't!
Mr. Duritz, i'm not trying to trick you.

I'm trying to understand
your issues.

Issue. Issue, singular.
Just one.

All right. What is it?

For the last...
few weeks,

I have been seeing
a guy in a plane.

Oh, i see.

Not that kind of seeing!
I mean...

I've been hallucinating
a guy in a plane.

And these...

Delusions or whatever it is
you people call them,

Seem to be getting worse.

Anyway, now i'm...
seeing a kid.

And you think this kid
is a hallucination too?

Yes.

Is he someone you knew from your past,
from your childhood?

No, not from my childhood.
I've forgotten my childhood.

My childhood is in the past,
where it belongs.

But doesn't want to stay in the past,
does it?

Mr. Duritz, i notice
your eye is twitching.

I don't have a tic.
I didn't say you had a tic.

It's not a tic. I have dry eyes.
Why are you asking me about my dry eyes?

Why are you so upset?
Because i'm having hallucinations!

And i'm asking you
to make them go away...

With very powerful medication that
i can pick up on my way to work.

Please, ma'am.

Mr. Duritz, you will pick up
your powerful medicine...

And then you will go home...

And take the rest of the day off.
Yes, ma'am.

This is for
a total of four pills.

They will help to keep you
calm until tomorrow at 4:00,

At which time i expect to see
you back here in my office...

For an appointment,
which you must promise to keep.

Yes, ma'am.

You're having these
hallucinations for a reason.

Yes, ma'am.
And, mr. Duritz,

You need to figure out
what that reason is.

Thank you.

The woman in question,
if i understand it correctly,

She was your
pilates instructor.

Um, well...
Yeah, are you watching this?

unfortunately, yes.
I mean, not beautiful like you are, honey.

Oh, that's good.
Why won't he just say what i told him to say?

He's an actor.
He's improvising.

Give me his cell phone number.

They won't let him take
his cell phone to the set.

Well, just get me
any number, okay, janet?

Coast guard, the police.

Just get me a number before
he spontaneously combusts.

Let me see if i can get the
power taken out in atlanta.

Okay, go.

mm-Hmm, mm-Hmm.

Okay, got it. Bye.

You! Don't get mad.
I'll clean it up.

Don't move!

Look, look, this has just gotta stop, okay?
This is... This is wrong!

You can't just go around breaking
into people's houses like this!

It's against the law!

I'm just gonna call the police now,
all right?

Tell them...

Do i know you?

I don't know.

Why do you keep
comin' back here?

I came back
to get my plane.

And then i saw the popcorn.
Your plane?

My mom gave it to me for christmas.
How'd you get it?

That is my plane, okay?

My dad just dropped
it off over here.

Okay? It was in his attic for a long time.
I've had that plane for 30...

Thirty years.

Then why does it have
my name on it?

Look. Right here.
"Rusty."

Russell morley duritz.

I hate that stupid name!

How'd you know my name?

Mother's name is gloria. Your father's
name is sam. How do you know all that?

Your sister's name is joanne.
But everybody calls her...

Josie.
Josie.

Hi.

Hi.

Are you
who i think you are?

I don't know.

How did i get here?

I don't know.

Holy smokes.

How old are you?

Forty...
in a couple days.

That... is... old.

I'm turning eight
in a couple days.

Eight.

You're eight.

I'm eight.

This is scary.

No.

This is hilarious.

All right. I'm just going to the kitchen.
I'm gonna make a sandwich.

There's safety
in sandwiches.

See?
Safety in sandwiches, see?

It's funny how he knew that we called joanne
"josie."

But only i know
the secret name...

I had for aunt cathy...

When she was having
her epileptic spells.

Safety.
Safety in a sandwich.

Safety in a sandwich.

Safety in a sandwich.
Safety...

Get out!

Okay, hallucination,
get out!

Am i having
a nightmare?

No. You are not having
a nightmare, you see.

You do not exist.

I am having a nightmare, okay,
and my nervous breakdown.

This is my first nervous breakdown,
so i'm not quite sure

How this is supposed to go.

But i'm pretty sure that i'm dreaming,
you understand? Dreaming! Dreaming!

Dreaming! Dreaming!
Okay?

I don't think you're dreaming 'cause you're
talking and your eye is sort of twitching.

Hey! I don't have time
to go crazy, okay?

So if you want me to go crazy,
you're gonna have to get on the phone...

And call janet just like everybody
else and schedule an appointment!

Ah. Ah, good. Okay.

Make contact
with the outside world.

Hi, janet. It's russ.
No, no, good.

Uh-Huh. Nothing. Fine.
No, i just came upstairs to return my calls.

You wanna hear something funny?
I was downstairs...

And now i'm upstairs, you see...
hey.

You dropped this.

russ, hello!
Safety in a sandwich.

Safety in a sandwich.
Safety!

Safety in a... sandwich.

Ohh.

You are just
a hallucination!

One that is
about to disappear.

Prepare to disappear!

You better disappear.

I'm sitting on the floor.

I'm taking the
very powerful medication.

just waiting for it
to kick in.

Prepare to disappear.
Ha ha!

Disappeared?

Very powerful medicine
seems to be working.

I'm still here.

Ohh.

I'm not throwing your dismembered
enemies into the dumpster.

I've got my limits.

Do you remember
when i had you sign

Those confidentiality
papers at the office?

Yeah.
And do you remember me telling you...

That if you ever said anything to anyone
about anything that happens in this company...

That i would not only sue you,
but i would bring you to financial ruin?

Snore.

Okay, then.

You can, uh...
You can see him?

Yes, i, um, can.

You can see a little boy
standing there.

Yes.

I'm pretty sure.

Okay.

This little boy
is me at age eight.

And i want you
to make him disappear.

He's you? At age eight?
Yeah. Mm-Hmm.

And you want me
to make him disappear.

Please.

How was the therapist this morning?
Do it, janet!

How am i supposed to make a kid disappear?
Hey, you are the assistant!

Figure it out, okay?

You yelled at me! That is great.
That... That helps.

I feel i'm thinking
more clearly.

I-I feel i'm just more in touch with my,
my magic assistant powers.

Alakazam, alakazam.

Alakazam kazoo.
Boom! Presto! Ha!

Hi.
Didn't work.

I should've worn
my magic bra and panties.

Get in the car.

I'm really disappointed in you, janet.
Oh, fired, i hope.

No. Forget about your bonus.
Oh, boo hoo. What about my dental?

My boss appears
to have lost his mind.

Sure you wouldn't rather
stay here with me?

I'll be okay.

Waaah! Waaah!
Somebody call the "waaambulance"!

what are you
crying about anyway?

I just wanna go home.

Well, i'm trying
to get you home, okay?

Am i in trouble? You're gonna be in
trouble if you wipe that snot...

On my calfskin seat...
Don't do it.

Just try and remember
where you live, okay?

You should know that.
Well, i don't know that. We moved 12 times.

We move a dozen times?

Yes. A dozen is 12.
We moved 12 times. What happens?

what happens?
A big truck comes,

They put all your stuff inside
and you move to another house.

Twelve times. Look!
There it is right there! Remember it now?

No. Look,
that's where we fell off the roof last year.

That's the bush
we fell onto.

And that's where the really big
possum crawled under the house.

Remember?
Yeah, that was one of life's big events,

When the possum
crawled under the house.

How could i forget?
You don't remember the possum?

It was like this big!

And it had
really long teeth.

He took our sneaker in his mouth and ran
off with it. You've gotta remember that.

Hey, i don't remember
the possum, okay?

I hardly remember
living here at all.

But you do, and that's
all that counts. Get out.

Wait.

The house.
It's different.

Bye, honey.

Who are they?

What am i gonna do?

What now?

Hey, will you knock off
the waterworks, okay?

You know what the number one killer of
kids under the age of eight is? Self pity.

And you're already
pitiful enough.

Well, at least
i don't do this!

Nice.

Chester! Here, boy!
Come on, chester!

Chester!

Here, boy!
Come on, chester!

chester!

Come on, chester!
Chester!

Here, boy!
Come on, chester!

Chester!
Kid, will you stop that yelling?

Chester!
Hey! Now!

Where's chester?

Who's chester?

My dog.
The dog i'm going to get when i grow up.

Oh.

The world's greatest dog.

The one who rides
in the back of my truck,

Plays frisbee,
goes everywhere i go.

Chester!
Bad news, kid.

No dog here.
What do you mean?

I mean no dog.
There's no dog here.

I don't own a dog.
No dog?

No dog? I grow up to be a guy with no dog?
That's right.

Why don't i have a dog?
Because i don't want a dog, okay?

I can't take care of a dog.

I travel all the time
for work.

Travel for work?

I grow up
to fly jets, right?

I knew it! I knew i would
grow up to fly jets!

Uh, no.

No, i don't fly jets?
Not really, no.

What do i do then?
You're an image consultant.

What's that?
Uh, it's...

What does a consultant do?
Consult.

But what do i do?

You don't do anything.
You tell other people what to do.

That's the fun of it.
You boss people around.

Like this. Stop talking!

Shouldn't there be
a lady here somewhere?

What do you mean, a lady living here?
No. I live alone.

I thought you said
you were 40.

I said i was almost 40.
So?

So, i'm 40,
i'm not married,

I don't fly jets,
and i don't have a dog?

I grow up to be a loser.

™�john jacob
jingleheimer schmidt ♪

™�that's my name too ♪

™�whenever we go out
the people always shout ♪

™�there goes john jacob
jingleheimer schmidt ♪

™�da na na
na na na na ♪

™�john jacob
jingleheimer schmidt ♪

™�that's my name too ♪

™�whenever we go out
the people always shout ♪

™�there goes john jacob
jingleheimer schmidt ♪

™�da na na
na na na na ♪

Wow!
Look at it! Man!

Gee! Holy smokes!
Holy moses!

Look at the moon!

Wow! Far out! Hey! Hey, hey, hey!
Stop that yelling!

Holy moses!
What are you doing up?

Look at it!
It's huge!

What is with you people?
It's the moon, okay?

You travel 30 years
across time,

And all you can do is stand out here
and scream about the moon coming up?

But you can see the man in
the moon really good tonight!

Well, did he speak to you?

Did he invite you up
for a little bit of cheese?

Did he blow fart bubbles
out of his butt, huh?

Because if he didn't,
then there really isn't any reason to be

Excited about the moon,

Is there? Sorry.
I'll never get excited again.

Obviously.

Wait!

Can i ask you
a question?

Why does the moon get
like orangey sometimes?

Because there is a, uh...

A band of, uh...

Just shut up
and go to sleep, okay?

Or better yet, go away!

I knew it! I grow up to be a
guy who doesn't know anything!

and who doesn't
have a dog!

™�john jacob
jingleheimer schmidt ♪

™�that's my name too ♪

Kid?

Good.

Maybe russ here can explain it a little
bit better than i've been able to. Russ?

Here's how we see things,
mr. Vivier.

Call me vivian.

Okay. Vivian.

You're going public,
you're making an ipo,

Your software's brilliant,
and that's all great.

But if you wanna make fortune 500,
you have to understand...

That at a certain point, people are
gonna want to get a good look at you.

And that's where things
get a little dicey.

Dicey. That's right.
Very, very dicey.

I don't see why i
have to change a thing.

Okay. Let's look at this.

You live in a cabin...
I won't cut my hair,

And i won't
shave my beard.

Let me give it to you
straight, z.Z.

If you wanna ride your cow to farm-Aid,
you don't have to change a thing.

But if you wanna make the front
page of the wall street journal,

There is one thing you're
going to have to change.

The, uh...

To, um... Uh...

someone you know?

What?
Friend of yours?

No!

It's a little boy.
hello!

I don't know any little kids.
I'm starving!

Just tragic that parents would send
their kids out to beg like that.

Very, very sad.
I can't believe it.

Russ duritz, i'm hungry!

Feed me!
Ugh! I'm hungry!

If you'll excuse me for
just a... minute, please.

What are you doing here?
I thought you disappeared.

I don't know how to disappear.
I'm hungry! Hello.

I'm amy. Who are you?

I'm rusty.

And who is rusty?

My nephew.

Your nephew?
Yes. My sister's kid.

The one who's going to college in the autumn?
No. The other one.

Melissa?

Yes, amy.
This is melissa.

no, it is the other one.

The one she doesn't like to talk about.
Oh, i see.

Which completely explains why
you never told me about him.

Maybe i don't tell you
every thing.

So are you having fun
with your uncle?

Not really.
He made me sleep outside,

He didn't give me
any breakfast,

And he doesn't have a dog.

That is a problem.

You made him sleep outside?
He slept in a tent.

You've got a tent?
It was his tent.

You didn't give him
any breakfast.

He can stand
to miss a meal.

Rusty, are you hungry?

Starved.
Let's go and get some bacon and eggs.

No, no, no!
Rusty can't have bacon and eggs.

I've gotta get him
back to his mom right now.

Don't forget kenny's
this afternoon.

Bye, rusty!
Bye!

Nice to meet you.

just get that moony look
off your face.

i like that amy lady.

I bet she likes dogs.

I don't know what's worse.
The fact that i'm stuck with you...

Or the idea that i don't
know what to do about it.

Why don't we
eat something?

Why? Because you don't know what to do,
you just wanna stuff your face?

No, because it says to
up there in the sky.

Okay. Why don't we
eat something?

What can i get ya?

Um, i'll have french toast,
pancakes and bacon.

Just bring him
something healthy, okay?

Sorry, sir.
We only serve starchy, sugary, salty food...

High in fat and cholesterol
that tastes delicious.

comforts people
deep down inside.

Okay.
I'll have french toast, pancakes and bacon.

You want a milk shake with that?
Chocolate, please.

Extra whipped cream.

And for you? You know,
i think i'd just like the magic bean omelet.

Aw, did somebody not get their coffee today?
I'm gonna go get it!

Maybe you can bring it
before the diner disappears.

What are you
lookin' at, sparky?

oh, man.

What are you doing here?
Having french toast, pancakes and bacon.

That's not what i'm talking about.
What did you come here for?

I don't know.

My model airplane?

Well, you already got that
and we're still screwed up.

We're even more screwed up
than we were before.

What am i gonna do with you?
What do you wanna do with me?

I want to put you
on a diet, chubby!

Fix you up so you aren't
such a pathetic loser.

This is what i do
for a living, okay?

Making people look good
is what i do.

The problem is...

there's so much to do with you,
i don't know where to start.

Well, i'd like to not get
my butt kicked so much.

Kids are always
laughing at us.

It sorta hurts
my feelings.

Why didn't i
think of this before?

This is what
you came for, okay?

I just gotta teach you
how to fight. By the way,

They're not laughing at us,
they're laughing at you.

When you get to be me,
they laugh, they die!

They laugh, they die?
Yes.

You laugh, you die!
You laugh, you die!

You laugh, you die!
Pow! Pow!

Pow! Pow! Pow! Pow!
Pow! Pow! Pow!

Pow! Pow! Pow! Pow! Okay, okay.
Okay, okay, shut up!

Hey, guess what.
What?

I gotta pee.

Are you sure you know someone
who can teach me how to fight?

Yeah, i think
i could find somebody.

isn't it cool we both
have to go at the same time?

Yes. I'll cherish this
moment for a lifetime.

I'm just gonna have one more piece.
One more piece.

Hey!
Oh, god.

Please tell me
that's not pizza.

Hey, you're five weeks away
from defending your title.

What're you doin' eatin'...
I'm a nervous eater.

Beat it! You'd be nervous too if
you was gettin' married tomorrow.

Yeah, i'd be nervous
that my bride would dump me...

Because i'm a big, fat
tub of lard.

Hi, giselle.
Hi, russ.

What is that?
Is that 20 more pounds? No.

Hey!
Put... Damn, he won't even let you eat, huh?

does he look like he needs any pizza?
Who is he?

This is russ's nephew, rusty.

Oh, i didn't know
you had two nephews.

How do i look, baby?
Look. Mmm, like adonis.

Hey, hey, adonis.
Adonis!

What?
Can i use your boxing ring?

I wanna give pudge-Boy
here some lessons.

Maybe you could step in,
show him a few moves? Be glad to.

That way you can
punch his lights out...

The next time he tries
to call you pudge-Boy.

Groovy!

first things first.

You trying to get knocked out or something?
Get your hands up then!

You gotta protect that chin.
I pop you on that chin... that's it.

Remember, this is number one,
this is number two. You punch one, two.

One, two. Go ahead.
Try it.

that's it, that's it.
Come on. Get out of the way.

Come on.

Come on. Good.
Come on. Come on.

You hit me.
Yes, unfortunately i did hit you.

But i'm not gonna
beat myself up about it.

Or maybe... i will!

Come on, fight!
Yeah, come on! Come on.

Come on, kid!
Fight, come on. Come on.

One-Two! One-Two! Go on, rusty!
Punch his lights out!

Hey, whose side are you on?

Throw it, throw it!

aaagh!

Whoa, whoa!
Take it easy, little tyson!

What are you gonna do next? Bite his ear off?
We don't hit 'em when they're down.

They hit me when i'm down.
Whoa-Whoa-Whoa-Whoa! Who?

Kids at school.
Kid's having some trouble at school.

Well, why didn't you
say that, russ?

I'm teachin' the boy boxing.
He don't need that. He needs street fighting.

Why don't you show him that w.W.F.
Scissors hold? Here we go, ready?

Whoa!

Now that
i can use!

Have you noticed
how alike those two are?

makes sense.
They're related, right?

Suppose so.

Russ duritz's office.
How may i help you?

Yeah, it's me.
What's up? Oh, it's you.

I hadn't heard from you
in four hours.

I'd assumed you were dead.
Hey, how's mini-You?

That's hilarious, janet.
What's up?

You've got 19 messages last count.
Do you want 'em? Let me have 'em.

Let's see, uh...

Bob riley.
Bob riley.

Not bob riley.
Not bob riley. Bob riley.

Bob riley. I'm sure there's another one.
Just a second. Here's bob riley...

Hey...

Hey, amy!
Where are you going?

To my place for some ice cream.
See you there.

Ice cream?
Bye!

Can i ask you a question?

Sure.
Are you our girlfriend?

That's a funny way
of putting it.

Mostly... no.

Can i ask you a question?
Sure.

Are you our nephew?

Mostly...

No.

But you are related,
aren't you?

Uh-Huh.

How close?
Pretty.

How close
is pretty close?

Pretty darn.

Oh, my god.

Hi.
He's your son!

What? He's your son!
You have a son!

Oh, hey!

And all this time you never
even breathed a word!

And you're some
deadbeat dad...

Who had visitation rights
today or something.

Amy, do you know how...
Who's the mother, anyway?

I don't want to know. I know.
It's that swedish chick, isn't it?

Yeah, that ingesborg or smorgasborg
or whatever her name is.

Not that i care, of course,
about who or where or what you do!

Amy, he is not swedish.
And i'm not his son.

Honest.

Then who are you?

Russ?

Because i've been watching the two of
you together, and i swear to god...

There's something very...

Strange going on.

we have to tell her.

We are not going to tell her.
Tell me what?

Come on. Do it. Hey. Zip it.
We're not gonna tell her, okay?

Besides, she won't believe us anyway.
She'll just think you take after me.

Then do the knuckle.
That's not gonna convince her.

Then tell her something only
i would know and then she

Can ask me about
the same thing.

Like aunt spazzy.
How is that gonna work? Think about it.

Then show her the scar.
Anybody could have a scar.

What about the birthmark?
Well, that could be a coincidence too.

I know she'll believe us.
She is not going to believe us.

I know she'll believe us.
She is not going to believe us.

She will! She will! She will!
She won't! She won't!

Hey!
I wish i was standing on a carpet.

Told you.
Amy?

... aboard that ship...

...process the potatoes
into a variety of products.

Stop biting.

Leave me alone.

I'm advertising
terror and bewilderment.

Holy smokes.
Ninety-Nine channels and there's nothing on.

How... can this be?

I have no idea.

Look at him.
He's so...

Embarrassing.

You're not embarrassing.

You're adorable.

Then.
You're adorable then.

stop picking!

Look at that haircut.
I look like herman's hermits.

I "shpeak" like i got
a mouth full of "shpit."

Well, of course you do.

Doesn't the fact that i'm a
pathetic dweeb make you despise me?

No.

Why?

Do you despise you?

When i look at him,
all i see are awful memories,

Memories i've been spending most
of my life trying to forget.

I'm sorry.

Hello. Kenny.

Nauseous about the wedding
tomorrow?

My god, the wedding tomorrow.
Hang on a minute.

The wedding tomorrow.
What am i gonna do with him?

Take him with us.
What?

To an important event?
Are you out of your mind?

Take him with us?

This is an important event, with people
who respect me. He's gonna humiliate me.

Hey!
Aw.

Hey!
I forbid you to bond with this boy.

What, kenny?
Who got sick?

™�

Thank goodness your nephew
replaced little james.

None of the other children was
fat enough to fit in his clothes.

it's okay. It's okay.

Don't worry about it.

™�yeah, yeah,
yeah ♪ ♪yester-Me yester-You ♪

™�yesterday ♪

™�ooh, ooh ♪

™�what happened to ♪

™�the world we knew ♪

™�when we would
dream and scheme ♪

™�and while the time away ♪

Don't worry. Just take it off and shove
it under the table when no one's looking.

Really?
Yeah.

™�where did it go ♪
♪where did it go ♪

™�that yesterglow ♪

Hello.
™�when we could feel ♪

™�the wheels of life
turn our way ♪

™�yester-Me
yester-You ♪

™�yesterday ♪

™�i had a dream ♪
so did you ♪

™�life was warm ♪

™�and love was true ♪

Holy smokes.

Russ, russ!

Excuse me, clarissa.
You're interrupting us. We're dancing.

But it's really important!
Not now, kid.

But it's really,
really, r-R-R...

™�were just a cruel and
foolish game we had to play ♪

Drivin' you crazy, huh.
Yeah.

It's different
when they're your own.

Speaking of which,
when are you gonna give up

Your evil ways
and settle down?

As soon as you become
available again, clarissa.

I'm serious.
So am i.

™�i feel lost ♪

™�i feel sad ♪

Amy, i have a question.

A big one.
Okay.

What about that pretty woman
you came with today?

You mean amy?
No, we work together.

I've known her
for a really long time.

I know we haven't
known each other very long...

Don't worry about me.

When i meet the right person i'm
sure i'll get around to asking.

In case i never get around
to asking...

Somebody's makin'
a move right now.

Amy?

Will you marry me?

Okay, let's go.
Hey!

Let me go,
you big jerk!

Wait a minute, stop!

He asked me a question. Don't you
want to know what i was going to say?

No. No.
No?

He had no right asking you what he did, okay?
You and i aren't even...

Well we are!
Since when?

M.Y.O.B.!
What?

Mind your own beeswax. Do you or do you
not want to know what i was going to say?

What were you
gonna say?

Yeah, what were you going to say?
Try it again.

Less practiced indifference,
more... warmth.

What were you going to say?
What were you gonna say?

So you want to know what
i was going to say.

Take a walk.
I'm the one who asked her!

Just go away.

What were you going to say...
I was going to say...

I'll have to think about it.

Oh, really?
Yes. Because...

Impossibly,
what had previously seemed to me...

To be the worst idea
in the universe has,

Over the last 12 hours,
transmogrified into not such a terrible idea,

Opening up a very small window
of opportunity for you.

For me.
Yeah.

Ah.

And what if i didn't want to take
advantage of this opportunity?

A part of you
obviously wants to,

And it is that part of you
that is causing me...

To think about it.

Are you...

Asking me...

To think about it?

Wait.
Wait a minute.

If you'll just wait, i...

I'm gonna go get... The valet...
The c... The car... From the...

and now he's ready
to start feeling the love.

Oh yeah, before the game this
afternoon with the visiting orioles,

Riley invited a dozen kids to barrage
him with chocolate cream pies...

As a way to say
"i'm sorry"...

For what he claims is a simple
case of miscommunication.

Uncle bob knows
how to party!

So you crawled through the dumpster
behind the bar after i left.

I shot that.

I'm part of this.

Tell me, do you know
for certain...

That he turned the funds over,
or is he maybe still sitting on them?

Poor little amy.

Mixed up
with a rotten boss...

Who feels obligated
to his clients.

Do you know what the number
one killer of young...

Russ! The person
i am pitying here is not me.

Look,
it's all my fault.

I made the big
stupid mistake...

I thought you'd change.

I'm so sorry.
I'm really sorry.

Do you want to know what the saddest
part of this whole thing is?

You could have been great.

Man. Man!

When do we ever
stop blowing it?

Russ.

We've gotta change.

We have to change.

That's pretty cool
how we both have to, uh...

It's our birthday tomorrow.

Yeah, i know.

Can i ask you a question?
Sure.

What happens next?
What do you mean?

I mean, to me.

Between being me
and becoming you.

What happens?

Do i ever do anything right?

Well, sure you do.
You do a lot of things right.

Like what?

Well,

You make it through
grade school alive... Barely.

High school,
while you're still a loser...

You're no longer stupid.

You work your butt off
and you get good grades.

Very good grades.

You end up winning
a scholarship to u.C.L.A.

I'm smart?

Very smart.

But you're still a loser.
Hop in.

Scoot over.

In college,
you start to get a little bit better.

You join the track team...

Find a speech therapist and
continue to work your butt off.

You graduate
at the top of your class.

You eventually go after
a master's degree in business.

Where i work
my butt off.

Story of your life, kid.

The good news is that,

While you're currently
a pathetic dweeb,

Eventually
you grow up to be me...

A high-Powered,
affluent chick magnet.

Who doesn't have
a dog or a chick.

Is that how you see me?
A dogless, chickless guy?

With a twitch.
Right.

When do i get that?
I forget.

When do i learn how to drive?
When you're 16.

When do i get a car?
When you're 18.

When do i get a hickey?
When you're 17.

When do i find out
what a hickey is?

not tonight.

Russ?

Yeah, kid?

I get what you do now.

I mean, i get what i do.

When i grow up,
for a living.

I figured out how to explain.
Let me hear it.

You help people lie
about who they really are...

So that they can pretend
to be someone else, right?

Yeah.

See? That's not
hard to explain.

That's pretty good.

Good night, buddy.

Good night, kid.

™�
this is abc-7 los angeles.

Now, eyewitness news.

Good evening, everyone, and welcome.
I'm harold greene.

Good evening, y'all.
I'm deirdre lafever.

Tonight's top story:
another high speed chase...

On a los angeles freeway,

This time involving a mother
of eight in a stolen mini-Van.

The chase started about 8:30 this evening,
when police first no...

I know. Thanks, don.
See you tomorrow.

I heard the "y'all."

It works.

Well,
it's mr. Image consultant.

So.
What do you think?

Don't tell me.
My hair still too big?

No, it looks good.

Can i buy you a cup of coffee?
Comfort of strangers and all that?

If what you are
telling me is true,

That has got to be the strangest
thing i've ever heard.

Makes perfect sense to me.
It does?

Why wouldn't your eight-Year-Old
self time-Travel here

To give you a hand?

I mean, you're obviously in trouble.
He'd straighten you out.

You think he's here
to straighten me out?

Well, of course.

You didn't think it was the other way around,
did you?

Maybe he's here for you
to teach him some things.

But maybe he's here for you
to remember some things.

Ever thought about that?

Not until just now, no.

Darlin' look...

You're turnin' 40 tomorrow.

You haven't acquired a single thing
of real value in your life...

Hey...
And no, no, money doesn't count.

You're virtually friendless,
you barely talk to your family,

And you've just lost the only woman in the
world who's ever meant anything to you.

Who, amy?
Please.

Look, she's not the only woman
in the world. Okay?

She... She works for me.

She's neurotic.
She bites her nails.

Nail.

This one.

Oh, my god.

Excuse me. Um, while he's gettin' a clue,
could i get a warmup, please?

Thank you.

Okay, don't stop.
Go on.

What's it like?

He keeps asking
about his future.

My past. Haven't
really told him much.

Good.
Good?

You think that's good?

Why?
What would you do?

If little deirdre
was suddenly here?

Burstin' out of her st. Mary's uniform askin'
me what comes next?

Yeah.

I'd say, "baby,

"Don't you worry
about a thing.

Everything is just
gonna be great."

I mean, how many of us
turn out the way...

We think we will
when we're kids, really?

I mean, how many of us
grow up to be astronauts?

Or prima ballerinas?

We just all do
the best we can.

Time for me
to take big deirdre home.

You know, if you want to learn about your
childhood, seems like you're on line...

With a pretty good source,
you know what i mean?

Yes, i am.

Deirdre, thanks
for taking the time to help.

Well, don't ever stop
asking for help, russ.

You just might get it.

Thanks.
You take care.

Bye, y'all.

Bye.

hi, janet, it's me.
I'm sorry to call so late.

It's okay, russ.
I think i'll recover.

I just want you to cancel all my appointments
tomorrow and move them to friday.

Anything else?
No, that's it.

Okay, you got it.
No, wait.

There is something else.

I want you to find out why
the full moon looks orange

Sometimes when it rises.

Yeah, sure. Thanks, janet.
Good night.

Hey, kid.
Rusty.

Hi.
Hi.

Wanna help me
with something?

I think it might get you back to your time.
Sure.

Good.

Anything about me?

Yeah. Anything
that'll take me back.

Hmm.

You know how i like
to find caterpillars...

And put them in jars
and feed 'em...

And watch 'em
make cocoons?

No.

And then one day,

They break out
and it's really cool.

No. Not a clue.

But keep going.
Tell me some more stuff.

Remember last summer
at josie's birthday party...

When i got parmesan cheese
stuck up my nose?

got any sixes?

Nope. Go fish.

Any fours?

Negative. Go fish.

Got any sevens?

Tell me some more
about dad.

Sometimes...

He lets me help him
work on the car.

If i do something wrong...

He yells at me.

Sometimes he buys me
ice cream afterwards.

But still,
i don't like messing up.

Like last week...

I lost a screw.

I was afraid to tell him.

I found it later on
in my pocket.

Look, i still have it.

I'm afraid
to give it back to him.

Got any nines?

No.

My homeroom teacher last
year was fat mrs. Kinkelman.

She was so much better
than mr. Lupus.

He had that purple
bump on his face.

I don't remember the bump guy.
What grade was that?

How come you're asking me
all this stuff?

'Cause i'm
forgetting something.

I'm forgetting this one event
that meant something to me...

And if i can remember that one thing,
maybe i can get you home.

Are you sure it's not
the purple bump?

It's not the bump, kid.
It was a pretty big bump.

Tell me more about second grade.
Why?

Nobody had a bump
in second grade.

my best friend was tim wheaton,
until a few months ago.

Remember him?

no, i don't.

His house smells like fish sticks.
No.

Well, he was my best friend until he
started hanging out with vince...

And these other creepy guys.

He threw a rock at me and we
haven't been friends since then.

He threw a rock at us?
Oh, yeah.

Why? What happened?
Oh, those guys get together...

Every recess in the corner
of the playground yard...

Where they like
to pick on kids.

Back behind the kindergarten.

Yeah.
Where the yard monitor can't see you!

Where that big sliding board is?
Yeah, the really huge one!

You remember it!
Go on. Don't stop.

There's four of them,
and if they don't like you...

They make
your life a nightmare!

And the worst thing about them is
they're really mean to animals.

Especially this one
three-Legged dog.

Tripod!

Tripod!
The dog's name is tripod!

I know the dog's name!
I know everything, kid.

I know why you're here!
This is the event!

Vince kajinski, the fight!
The fight!

It was my eighth birthday.
It was 32 years ago.

Today!
Ha, ha, ha!

Holy smokes.

Look at the car!

Look at your clothes!

holy smokes.

Holy smokes!
Holy smokes!

We did it, kid! Am i home!
Is it really 1968?

No doubt about it, kid.
What time's recess?

10:30.
Hang on, kid.

We've got 15 minutes
to change our life.

Okay, now listen.
This is gonna happen real fast,

So you gotta remember what kenny told you,
all right: one, two, one, two.

One, two...
Keep your head down, keep swingin'.

Look, look, look!
There's the really big slide, remember?

it used to be a lot bigger.

Here's what i remember:

Some really bad guys tie up
that three-Legged dog, tripod.

When you try to stop them,
you get really thrashed.

Oh, no.
Do i save him?

No. You go down
after only one punch,

Thereby solidifying your
reputation as a loser...

For the next eight years,
all the way through high school...

And ruining our life
from that moment on.

Oh, holy smokes.

Any second now, vince kajinski and his
cohorts are gonna come around that corner.

Look. There they are.
Hey, boo!

They're gonna say something to you
to get you to come over there.

Once you get back there,
they have tripod tied up.

Any questions?

Yeah. What's a cohort?

Hey, rusty,
come over here.

It's your birthday, right?
We got a present for you.

Look, kid. You don't have
to do this at all.

You don't have
to fight today.

come on, hurry up!

No. If i don't
go against them today,

I'll have to fight tomorrow
or the next day,

And today,
you're here with me.

That's right.
I'm here with you today.

I can do this.

You can do it.
Don't be afraid.

Here i come!

I'll be right here.

what took you so long?

come on, rusty.
I just saw it...

Yeah, hurry up.

Come on, man, it'll be great.
Why don't you go?

Yeah. It'll be fun.
There's your present.

What are you doing?
This stinkin', three-Legged dog's worthless.

We'll see him run.
Light the firecrackers.

Let the dog go.
You guys are dirtbags.

What did you call us?
Dirtbags!

Good shot.
We rule.

what a dope.

That was far out.
Yeah, right on.

Vince, turn around.

Oh, that's how it's gonna be.

come on, vince, get him!

Stop it!

Get him!
Come on! Get him!

Aah! Stop!
Come on, wimp!

Are you gonna cry?

One, two. One, two.
Gonna run to your mom?

One, two!

Say uncle! Say uncle!
No.

Apologize!
No.

say uncle!
Apologize!

Uncle. I'm sorry.

Yes! You won.

Holy smokes! You did it!
Yabba-Dabba-Doo!

Ha, ha!
Yabba-Dabba-Doo is right.

You won the fight. You really did it.
I did it, i did it.

That's all!
I did what i had to do.

Everything's gonna
be different now.

Yeah, i guess so.

Over.
That is all. Yes.

That's all, right?

oh, no.
What?

It's not over.

This gets worse, kid.
Much worse.

What are you talking about?
I won the fight.

It wasn't the fight.

That wasn't it.

It's not over.

Ice on the eye, son.

mr. Branch, i put all
the reports on your desk.

mom. I'm sorry, mom.
I'm sorry.

oh, it's okay. It's okay.

i'm sorry you had to come in,
mrs. Duritz.

We all know
you haven't been well.

please,

Don't punish him,
mr. Branch.

It's his birthday today.

Mom, daddy's home.
Daddy?

Gloria.

What are you doing?
Are you out of your mind?

I'm fine. I'm fine.

Shh, shh, shh.

You stay there!

Please don't scare him.
He's had a hard day.

Gloria, the doctor said you
weren't to leave the house.

What is the matter with you?
I'm sorry.

How could you do this to your mother?
What are you trying to do, kill her faster?

What?
We're gonna lose her.

God, and you pull some stunt like
you did today. You're killing her!

I found the screw, dad.
The screw.

Stop cryin'.
Here's the screw, dad.

Look! Here it is.
Here it is. I found it.

Stop cryin'.
Please, dad, look at the screw.

Here it is.
Stop crying.

Stop.

You gotta grow up, now.

Do you understand?

Yes, sir.
Grow up. Grow up!

Mom's dying.

I know.
Soon?

Yeah.

Before your next birthday.

Did i do it?

No.

No, you didn't do it.

It's not your fault.

Dad was just saying those
things because he's scared.

'Cause he knows that
he has to raise you alone...

And he doesn't
know how to do it.

I thought
you never cried.

Not since
my eighth birthday.

Guess i'm starting up again.

How come?

'Cause i just figured out
where i got that twitch from.

Somebody call
the "waaambulance."

Yeah. Yeah.

Gonna need 'em
now, huh?

Come on. You wanna
get outta here?

Let's go.

Let's go get
something to eat.

Okay. But i'm eating
whatever i want.

This is disgusting.
Let me have some of yours.

Hey!
Hey!

You don't seem all that mad.
About what?

That we didn't
change anything.

Like the fact that we're still gonna
have to fight vince kajinski...

Every week
all through grade school?

Yeah.
And we'll still be ugly through high school?

But not stupid.
Not stupid.

And that we spend
our college years...

As a chickless, dogless
jerk with a twitch?

And still not have
a family when we're 40?

Yeah.

What's done is done.

Yeah.

But, hey, this is our birthday.
Okay?

Happy birthday, kid.
Cheers, kid.

Mmm.

Hello, boy.
How are you doin'?

Who are you?
chester, come on, boy.

Did you hear
what he just called his dog?

Chester.

can that...

Be that?

No way.
Can't be.

You like the old plane?

Uh-Huh.

Yeah.

You did all this.

You put that plane
on my doorstep.

Yeah. Yeah,
i thought that was a particularly nice touch.

Yeah. It was.

I bet you got
a lot of questions.

Yeah.
Well, i wouldn't worry about it.

You've got 30 years
to figure 'em out.

Right now
i gotta go.

Family's waiting.

It was especially nice
seeing you again.

I'll see you.
Yeah.

Bye.

Holy smokes.

We did it.

Holy smokes!

We did it!
We did it!

Yeah-Ho-Ho!

i'm okay! We're okay!
We're okay!

We okaaaaay!

You're a pilot.
You're a pilot.

You're a pilot.
No, you're a pilot.

I'm a pilot.
We grow up to be pilots!

We grow up to be pilots!
Hey!

Did you see our dog?
What's his name?

Chester.
Chester,

The world's greatest dog!
The world's greatest dog!

Yes!
Hoo-Ha, hoo-Ha...

Did you see our family?
Yeah.

Wild.

That old lady
looked familiar.

Yeah.
I thought so too.

Look at us go.
Yeah.

Look at us go.

I am not a loser!

Look at us go.

Kid?

Bye, kid.

Thanks.

Hello?

I'm here.

Russ?

Russ? Hi, janet. I'm back here.
I'll be out in a second.

Hey, a couple of questions.
Why am i not at the office?

Why are you
not at the office?

And where have you been?
Did you call my dad?

Yes, i told him you'd be there
sunday to help him move.

He almost had a heart attack,
if that was your intention.

What about the plane
tickets to hawaii?

I booked 'em. Two first-Class seats.
You leave at 2:00.

Thank you.
Got a pen?

Change these names on here.
Use my credit card.

Russ!

i love it, i love it,
i love it, i love it.

Aloha, janet.

I love hawaii.
I love hawaii!

Do you want to come in?

Yes.

™�your love's ♪

™�lifted me higher ♪

™�than i've ever
been lifted before ♪

™�so keep it up ♪

™�quench my desire ♪

™�and i'll be at your side ♪

™�forevermore ♪

™�you know your love ♪

™�keeps on lifting me ♪

™�higher ♪

™�higher and higher ♪

™�i said, your love ♪

™�keeps on ♪

™�lifting me
higher and higher ♪

™�now once ♪

™�i was downhearted ♪

™�disappointment
was my closest friend ♪

™�but then you came ♪

™�and he soon departed ♪

™�and you know he never
showed his face again ♪

™�that's why your love ♪

™�keeps on lifting me ♪

™�higher, higher
and higher ♪

™�i said, your love ♪

™�keeps on ♪

™�lifting me higher
and higher ♪

™�all right ♪

™�

™�ooh, ooh ♪

™�i'm so glad ♪

™�i finally found you ♪

™�yes, that one
in a million girl ♪

™�and now with ♪

™�my loving arms
around you, honey ♪

™�i can stand up ♪

™�and face the world ♪

™�let me tell you
your love ♪

™�keeps on lifting me ♪

™�higher ♪

™�higher and higher ♪

™�i said, your love ♪

™�keeps on ♪

™�lifting me higher
and higher ♪

™�lifting, lifting
lifting ♪

™�keep my heart going ♪

™�higher and higher ♪

™�i said, keep on lifting ♪