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- Previously on Mom...
- So I came home,
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marched right into the bathroom,
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00:00:04,718 --> 00:00:06,486
told Andy I wanted to
deepen our relationship,
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00:00:06,510 --> 00:00:08,304
and you know what he said?
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00:00:08,378 --> 00:00:10,882
"Can I finish my shower first?"
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When I get home I just want
to take a shower and relax.
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I don't want to talk about my feelings.
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Especially when I'm not wearing pants.
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It's Jill. Safety first.
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Andy wants a break from her.
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00:00:24,907 --> 00:00:26,962
- Tammy, alcoholic.
- Hi, Tammy.
12
00:00:27,157 --> 00:00:28,541
Lately I've been looking
for ways to deepen
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00:00:28,565 --> 00:00:29,831
my spiritual connection,
14
00:00:29,867 --> 00:00:33,268
so, um, I decided to take
a peaceful nature hike.
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00:00:33,303 --> 00:00:36,571
No phones, no earbuds, not even gum.
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00:00:36,836 --> 00:00:39,007
And that's when I realized
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00:00:39,219 --> 00:00:43,417
hell is other people
while also walking uphill.
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00:00:43,814 --> 00:00:45,325
This couple behind me...
And I feel compelled
19
00:00:45,349 --> 00:00:47,768
to point out that the guy
was wearing leggings...
20
00:00:48,136 --> 00:00:51,319
Anyway, they were going on
and on in great gory detail
21
00:00:51,355 --> 00:00:53,816
about this tick that
had set up shop in his...
22
00:00:53,841 --> 00:00:55,995
well, let's just say his swimsuit area.
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She told me this one over breakfast.
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I mean, how am I supposed
to achieve inner peace
25
00:01:02,399 --> 00:01:04,496
when I'm listening to them
yakking about hot compresses
26
00:01:04,521 --> 00:01:07,119
and tweezer angles and him
passed out on the kitchen table?
27
00:01:07,144 --> 00:01:08,377
I thought, "You know,
28
00:01:08,412 --> 00:01:09,738
I'll just speed up so I
don't have to hear it."
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00:01:09,763 --> 00:01:11,214
But then I realized I'd
never know how it turned out,
30
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so I pretended to drink
water to catch the end.
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He's fine.
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00:01:15,636 --> 00:01:18,722
He just needs the leggings
to trust the woods again.
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Anyway, I never connected with God,
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00:01:22,450 --> 00:01:24,878
but I do know what to do in case a tick
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00:01:24,903 --> 00:01:27,763
ever sets up shop in my hoo-ha.
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Someone else, please.
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00:01:35,096 --> 00:01:37,681
- Jill, alcoholic.
- Hi, Jill.
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00:01:37,893 --> 00:01:40,360
Well, Andy and I are still on pause.
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00:01:40,591 --> 00:01:43,682
I guess we have a different definition
of what "pause" means.
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00:01:46,001 --> 00:01:48,168
See, now, that was a pause.
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00:01:48,635 --> 00:01:52,172
Oh, she was acting. I didn't
know what was happening.
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00:01:52,207 --> 00:01:55,062
People, we're at day 16,
and I'm coming unglued.
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00:01:55,382 --> 00:01:57,210
I'm also regretting the fact
that I let Andy be the one
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00:01:57,246 --> 00:01:59,734
who gets to say, "Pause over."
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00:02:00,968 --> 00:02:03,127
I just wish I knew what
was going on in his head.
46
00:02:03,930 --> 00:02:05,992
I mean, he has told me
that sometimes I can be
47
00:02:06,017 --> 00:02:09,445
a bit too much, but... if
loving hard and living large
48
00:02:09,470 --> 00:02:12,203
means I'm too much,
then guilty as charged.
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00:02:14,181 --> 00:02:17,950
I just feel so helpless...
and as we all know,
50
00:02:17,975 --> 00:02:20,509
that is a dangerous
feeling for an alcoholic.
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00:02:21,355 --> 00:02:24,314
But I mean, I-I'm not
gonna drink or use over it.
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00:02:24,927 --> 00:02:27,727
I may have gone on a
bit of a shopping spree.
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00:02:28,010 --> 00:02:30,791
American Express called
to make sure I was okay.
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00:02:30,816 --> 00:02:32,682
They're so sweet.
55
00:02:32,707 --> 00:02:34,874
Anyway, thanks.
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00:02:36,957 --> 00:02:39,853
- Bonnie, alcoholic.
- Hi, Bonnie.
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00:02:39,888 --> 00:02:41,213
Don't worry, Jill.
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00:02:41,238 --> 00:02:43,023
Adam and Andy are
watching football tonight,
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00:02:43,058 --> 00:02:44,702
so I'll find out what's
going on in his head.
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00:02:44,726 --> 00:02:46,226
I'm sorry, I know that was cross talk,
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00:02:46,261 --> 00:02:48,528
but she usually sits next to
me and I just whisper to her
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00:02:48,553 --> 00:02:50,488
while Marjorie drones on.
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00:02:52,256 --> 00:02:54,152
Marge, bring us home. Big finish.
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00:03:15,626 --> 00:03:16,925
Whoa.
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00:03:18,289 --> 00:03:20,028
Whoa. Hey.
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00:03:20,064 --> 00:03:21,649
Hey.
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00:03:22,032 --> 00:03:23,565
What are you doing up so late?
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00:03:23,860 --> 00:03:26,201
Uh, I'm just, uh, watching this movie.
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00:03:26,236 --> 00:03:28,733
It's an infomercial for Flex Seal.
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00:03:29,640 --> 00:03:30,839
Well, it's riveting.
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00:03:30,874 --> 00:03:32,841
They're making a boat out of rags.
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00:03:32,937 --> 00:03:34,114
Could've used that when I was trying
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00:03:34,139 --> 00:03:35,772
to get out of the Philippines.
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00:03:37,614 --> 00:03:40,682
- Well, good night.
- Wait.
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00:03:40,717 --> 00:03:42,921
- How was your night with Andy?
- Great.
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00:03:42,946 --> 00:03:44,479
Wait, wait.
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00:03:44,621 --> 00:03:46,955
He hasn't talked to Jill for 16 days.
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00:03:46,990 --> 00:03:49,324
- Did he say why?
- It didn't come up.
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00:03:49,359 --> 00:03:50,592
You were with him all night
81
00:03:50,627 --> 00:03:52,527
- and it didn't come up?
- No.
82
00:03:52,563 --> 00:03:53,840
Then what the hell did you talk about
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00:03:53,864 --> 00:03:55,530
for five and a half hours?
84
00:03:55,681 --> 00:03:58,433
Oh, the end of the early game,
and then the whole late game.
85
00:03:58,579 --> 00:04:01,187
Which actually had a
successful onside kick.
86
00:04:01,212 --> 00:04:03,538
I mean, you just don't see
it since the rule change.
87
00:04:03,574 --> 00:04:06,708
Really? The only couples friends
we've ever had are in crisis,
88
00:04:06,743 --> 00:04:08,977
and you didn't ask
him anything about it?
89
00:04:09,012 --> 00:04:11,713
- No.
- That is so men.
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00:04:11,748 --> 00:04:13,748
No feelings allowed.
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00:04:13,784 --> 00:04:15,650
Oh, no, there were plenty of feelings.
92
00:04:15,686 --> 00:04:18,253
You have to understand,
this onside kick...
93
00:04:18,288 --> 00:04:21,156
If you say the words "on," "side"
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00:04:21,191 --> 00:04:23,058
or "kick" one more time,
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00:04:23,093 --> 00:04:24,871
I'm going into the kitchen,
grabbing a can of soup,
96
00:04:24,895 --> 00:04:27,329
and throwing it at you as hard as I can.
97
00:04:28,113 --> 00:04:29,586
Sorry.
98
00:04:30,224 --> 00:04:33,682
Just really changed the ga... Sorry.
99
00:04:34,313 --> 00:04:37,305
Think. Did he say anything at all?
100
00:04:37,341 --> 00:04:39,474
Anything at all that might explain
101
00:04:39,509 --> 00:04:41,009
how he's feeling about Jill
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00:04:41,044 --> 00:04:43,445
or if anything's changed
in their relationship?
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00:04:43,480 --> 00:04:44,813
He really didn't, Bonnie.
104
00:04:44,848 --> 00:04:47,289
The man's got a lot
on his plate right now.
105
00:04:47,314 --> 00:04:50,051
He's breaking in a new partner,
he's trying to make sergeant,
106
00:04:50,087 --> 00:04:51,786
he had the Raiders plus three,
107
00:04:51,811 --> 00:04:53,911
which the onside kick completely just...
108
00:04:54,011 --> 00:04:56,689
I'll just go get the can of soup myself.
109
00:05:01,056 --> 00:05:02,197
Wait a second.
110
00:05:02,232 --> 00:05:03,632
Wait one damn second.
111
00:05:03,667 --> 00:05:04,799
Huh? What?
112
00:05:04,835 --> 00:05:06,901
Andy's new partner. Tell me more.
113
00:05:06,937 --> 00:05:08,615
What? I don't know,
she was on plainclothes,
114
00:05:08,639 --> 00:05:10,972
- and then she spent plainclothes...
- "She"?
115
00:05:10,999 --> 00:05:14,042
- She? She?
- That's what I said.
116
00:05:14,972 --> 00:05:17,879
Well, he's been partners
with Bert for ten years.
117
00:05:17,914 --> 00:05:20,415
- What happened to Bert?
- He reunited with his twin brother
118
00:05:20,450 --> 00:05:23,051
and they got picked
to do The Amazing Race.
119
00:05:24,582 --> 00:05:27,917
You know, there was a third one,
but Bert ate him in the womb.
120
00:05:30,332 --> 00:05:33,769
Wow, well, Andy was blindsided.
121
00:05:33,794 --> 00:05:35,827
And-and, uh, you know,
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00:05:35,852 --> 00:05:38,543
now he spends 12 hours a
day in a car with Joanna.
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00:05:38,568 --> 00:05:39,634
The skank.
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00:05:39,670 --> 00:05:41,336
Okay, ladies.
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00:05:41,371 --> 00:05:43,405
I know our brains are excellent machines
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00:05:43,440 --> 00:05:45,006
for jumping to conclusions,
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00:05:45,042 --> 00:05:47,409
but we don't know
anything about this Joanna.
128
00:05:47,563 --> 00:05:49,855
I know her. I see her
all the time at the ER.
129
00:05:49,880 --> 00:05:51,780
Well, there you go.
I'm sure she's very...
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00:05:51,815 --> 00:05:55,305
Hold on, Marjorie, I want to
hear what Wendy has to say.
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00:05:55,896 --> 00:05:57,969
You get one a year. Make it count.
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00:05:59,256 --> 00:06:01,323
Tell me everything about her.
133
00:06:01,818 --> 00:06:03,152
She's nice.
134
00:06:05,324 --> 00:06:06,590
Is that it?
135
00:06:06,615 --> 00:06:07,706
Kinda.
136
00:06:07,731 --> 00:06:09,331
Somebody get me a can of soup.
137
00:06:09,366 --> 00:06:10,598
I'll get it out of her.
138
00:06:10,832 --> 00:06:12,734
I don't know what you want from me.
139
00:06:13,027 --> 00:06:15,136
She has two dogs, Barkley and Slayton.
140
00:06:15,172 --> 00:06:17,839
Aw, now I feel bad for
calling her a skank.
141
00:06:19,671 --> 00:06:21,467
But she still is.
142
00:06:22,818 --> 00:06:24,612
What does she look like?
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00:06:24,637 --> 00:06:26,270
Your nostrils are scaring me.
144
00:06:27,162 --> 00:06:28,817
This is getting out of hand.
145
00:06:28,852 --> 00:06:31,643
- Calm down, Jill.
- You're right.
146
00:06:32,110 --> 00:06:34,810
Wendy, honey,
147
00:06:35,292 --> 00:06:37,258
what does she look like?
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00:06:38,284 --> 00:06:40,985
I don't know. She's just nice.
149
00:06:41,356 --> 00:06:42,981
Around 40 years old.
150
00:06:43,006 --> 00:06:44,332
Kind of average-looking.
151
00:06:44,368 --> 00:06:47,102
Before me, average was Andy's type.
152
00:06:47,147 --> 00:06:49,481
Okay, okay, you have
no reason to suspect
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00:06:49,506 --> 00:06:51,106
that Joanna and Andy have anything
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00:06:51,141 --> 00:06:53,375
beyond a professional relationship.
155
00:06:53,400 --> 00:06:55,433
And, Jill, you agreed to this break
156
00:06:55,479 --> 00:06:56,578
to give him time to think,
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00:06:56,613 --> 00:06:58,346
and you have to honor that agreement.
158
00:06:58,382 --> 00:07:00,849
Okay, but I made that
agreement before I knew about
159
00:07:00,874 --> 00:07:03,098
average Joanna and her two damn dogs.
160
00:07:03,238 --> 00:07:05,286
Oh, and she also collects vintage dolls.
161
00:07:05,311 --> 00:07:07,411
What, have you watched a
documentary on this woman?
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00:07:07,886 --> 00:07:10,379
My kingdom for a can of soup.
163
00:07:12,518 --> 00:07:14,720
Steak, Tater Tots, beer and me.
164
00:07:14,765 --> 00:07:17,265
Your four favorite food groups.
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00:07:17,300 --> 00:07:18,666
It all looks great.
166
00:07:18,702 --> 00:07:20,568
And again, my apologies.
167
00:07:20,604 --> 00:07:22,637
I did not know I was
striking your handsome face
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00:07:22,662 --> 00:07:24,295
with the zipper side of the pillow.
169
00:07:24,535 --> 00:07:27,308
Apology accepted, but if
anybody at the bar asks,
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00:07:27,344 --> 00:07:29,611
I took a guy with a knife down.
171
00:07:30,269 --> 00:07:32,847
- How's Jill doing?
- Not good.
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00:07:32,883 --> 00:07:35,049
The Joanna bombshell
sent her into a tailspin,
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00:07:35,085 --> 00:07:36,351
but she'll be fine.
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00:07:36,386 --> 00:07:37,993
Yeah, but Jill's fine and normal fine
175
00:07:38,018 --> 00:07:39,451
are not the same fine.
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00:07:40,190 --> 00:07:41,456
Go on.
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00:07:41,491 --> 00:07:43,725
Well, you know. She comes
with a side of drama.
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00:07:43,750 --> 00:07:46,618
It's like Andy says,
she's a bit of a handful.
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00:07:49,907 --> 00:07:51,933
Tell me the Tater Tot
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00:07:51,968 --> 00:07:54,569
is not the most perfect form of potato.
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00:07:54,604 --> 00:07:57,727
You got the crispy outside,
you got the fluffy inside...
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00:07:57,752 --> 00:07:59,151
Do you think I'm a handful?
183
00:08:02,272 --> 00:08:05,804
- What do you mean?
- Is that what you say about me?
184
00:08:06,750 --> 00:08:07,982
I don't say that.
185
00:08:08,018 --> 00:08:09,884
Andy says that about Jill.
186
00:08:09,920 --> 00:08:14,189
What I say about you is... other stuff.
187
00:08:15,425 --> 00:08:16,891
Wow.
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00:08:17,302 --> 00:08:19,735
- Is that a good wow?
- It is not.
189
00:08:20,831 --> 00:08:22,163
I want you to explain to me
190
00:08:22,199 --> 00:08:24,332
how I got in trouble for
something that Andy said.
191
00:08:24,367 --> 00:08:26,835
- You know how.
- I-I really don't. I...
192
00:08:27,263 --> 00:08:30,170
But since you're already
mad, I'll take your Tots.
193
00:08:34,044 --> 00:08:36,644
Hey, I'm just calling
to see how you're doing.
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00:08:36,680 --> 00:08:38,413
I'm doing a lot better now.
195
00:08:38,448 --> 00:08:39,814
Why are you whispering?
196
00:08:40,163 --> 00:08:42,350
Because Andy and Joanna have
their windows rolled down
197
00:08:42,385 --> 00:08:44,531
and they're right in front
of me at the stop sign.
198
00:08:44,821 --> 00:08:47,689
- So you're following them?
- Yep.
199
00:08:47,724 --> 00:08:50,091
And do they know you're there?
200
00:08:50,126 --> 00:08:51,493
I don't think so.
201
00:08:51,528 --> 00:08:54,496
I took my housekeeper's
car as a disguise.
202
00:08:54,521 --> 00:08:57,999
But I really wish I would've
peed before I came out here.
203
00:08:59,210 --> 00:09:01,202
Okay, I want you to listen to me.
204
00:09:01,238 --> 00:09:03,694
This is very, very wrong.
205
00:09:04,595 --> 00:09:08,007
I brought binoculars,
tacos and a jar to pee in.
206
00:09:10,965 --> 00:09:12,753
Hey, you didn't mention that
your housekeeper's car
207
00:09:12,778 --> 00:09:14,010
is also a Range Rover.
208
00:09:14,035 --> 00:09:15,595
Yeah, I gave her my old one.
209
00:09:15,620 --> 00:09:17,553
I put that woman through hell.
210
00:09:18,371 --> 00:09:21,268
Technical question...
can you see anything?
211
00:09:21,293 --> 00:09:23,823
Not really. Just give me
a heads-up if they turn.
212
00:09:23,848 --> 00:09:25,481
(sighs I got a better idea.
213
00:09:25,506 --> 00:09:27,628
How about I introduce you
to the Bonnie Plunkett School
214
00:09:27,652 --> 00:09:29,018
of Surveillance Techniques.
215
00:09:29,053 --> 00:09:31,931
Normally a masterclass I
teach out by the airport.
216
00:09:31,956 --> 00:09:34,123
I'm doing great. We're right behind 'em.
217
00:09:34,158 --> 00:09:35,269
Yeah. That's your first mistake.
218
00:09:35,293 --> 00:09:36,637
You never want to be right behind them.
219
00:09:36,661 --> 00:09:39,061
In fact, the best place
to be is in front of them.
220
00:09:39,097 --> 00:09:40,396
Well, how do I do that?
221
00:09:40,431 --> 00:09:41,731
And lesson one begins.
222
00:09:41,766 --> 00:09:43,799
All right, I'll pull over.
223
00:09:43,824 --> 00:09:45,056
No, you don't have to stop.
224
00:09:45,081 --> 00:09:46,923
Scooch your seat back, here I come.
225
00:09:46,948 --> 00:09:48,681
You want to go over or under?
226
00:09:48,706 --> 00:09:51,019
Well, pretty-pretty
sure I got to go over.
227
00:09:51,044 --> 00:09:52,410
Okay, on my mark.
228
00:09:52,435 --> 00:09:54,769
One, two, three.
229
00:09:54,794 --> 00:09:57,323
Keep your foot on the
pedals. Foot on the pedals.
230
00:09:57,348 --> 00:09:59,548
And... eject!
231
00:09:59,584 --> 00:10:02,051
Aah! Oh, my God, that worked!
232
00:10:02,093 --> 00:10:03,559
Ooh.
233
00:10:03,588 --> 00:10:06,699
Yeah, I only swerved four
feet over the yellow line.
234
00:10:06,724 --> 00:10:08,190
Nothing from your boyfriend up there.
235
00:10:08,226 --> 00:10:09,358
What kind of cops are they?
236
00:10:09,383 --> 00:10:11,661
The kind bonded by lust.
237
00:10:11,996 --> 00:10:13,529
All right, watch and learn.
238
00:10:13,564 --> 00:10:15,197
I'm gonna pull out in front of them.
239
00:10:15,233 --> 00:10:18,701
Usually I just sketch this
up on an overhead projector,
240
00:10:18,736 --> 00:10:21,103
but let's see if it actually works.
241
00:10:27,000 --> 00:10:29,200
- Mirror! Mirror!
- Right. Right.
242
00:10:29,993 --> 00:10:32,682
Oh, God, I can only see her.
243
00:10:32,707 --> 00:10:34,805
And me, looking desperate.
244
00:10:35,384 --> 00:10:38,487
And a little puffy from those tacos.
245
00:10:38,523 --> 00:10:39,922
Nobody stalks their boyfriend
246
00:10:39,958 --> 00:10:41,757
'cause their life is working out.
247
00:10:43,324 --> 00:10:45,828
How is it possible I've
been sober all this time,
248
00:10:45,853 --> 00:10:48,587
and I'm still driving
around, chasing men?
249
00:10:48,864 --> 00:10:51,324
Yeah, I thought sobering up
would get rid of my crazy, too,
250
00:10:51,349 --> 00:10:53,481
but nope, still crazy.
251
00:10:53,506 --> 00:10:57,174
Just a little less
confused during Fantasia.
252
00:10:57,442 --> 00:11:01,210
Mm. Maybe we should
just stop and go home.
253
00:11:01,682 --> 00:11:03,212
I'm proud of you, Jill.
254
00:11:03,510 --> 00:11:05,581
I knew if I came out here
and spent some time with you,
255
00:11:05,616 --> 00:11:07,149
you'd start to see that...
256
00:11:07,185 --> 00:11:08,884
Oh. They're pulling over.
257
00:11:08,909 --> 00:11:10,208
Quick, don't lose 'em.
258
00:11:10,233 --> 00:11:11,499
Uh, hang on.
259
00:11:18,319 --> 00:11:20,419
Wow. They didn't notice that, either.
260
00:11:20,444 --> 00:11:22,968
- This is fun.
- It is fun.
261
00:11:26,804 --> 00:11:30,306
Two cops, two coffees,
no doughnuts.
262
00:11:30,341 --> 00:11:32,341
Another myth exploded.
263
00:11:33,987 --> 00:11:37,556
Is it horrible that I wish
she were drop-dead gorgeous?
264
00:11:38,932 --> 00:11:40,727
I mean, I can't lose him to her.
265
00:11:40,752 --> 00:11:43,085
Well, that's awfully shallow, Jill.
266
00:11:43,885 --> 00:11:46,870
Although that mustache
isn't doing her any favors.
267
00:11:47,458 --> 00:11:50,259
No, wait. That's just a shadow.
268
00:11:50,294 --> 00:11:51,794
No, wait.
269
00:11:51,829 --> 00:11:54,630
Well, what the hell is that, then?
270
00:11:55,110 --> 00:11:56,999
If I lose him to somebody
less pretty than me,
271
00:11:57,035 --> 00:11:58,401
then it means it's me.
272
00:11:58,546 --> 00:12:00,179
You know, my insides.
273
00:12:01,249 --> 00:12:03,249
And I can't Botox my insides.
274
00:12:03,274 --> 00:12:06,079
- If only we could.
- Right?
275
00:12:09,380 --> 00:12:11,478
Oh, God, now they're laughing together.
276
00:12:11,503 --> 00:12:13,069
And that's his real laugh,
277
00:12:13,104 --> 00:12:15,805
not the fake one he
takes pity on me with.
278
00:12:15,840 --> 00:12:17,907
Adam has one of those, too.
279
00:12:17,932 --> 00:12:19,599
Heh-heh-heh.
280
00:12:19,644 --> 00:12:20,713
Always three.
281
00:12:20,738 --> 00:12:23,038
- Yeah, and they never make eye contact.
- Never.
282
00:12:23,315 --> 00:12:25,348
You know, I don't have a fake laugh.
283
00:12:25,383 --> 00:12:26,854
If something's not
funny, I just don't laugh.
284
00:12:26,879 --> 00:12:28,356
And that's what makes you awesome.
285
00:12:28,381 --> 00:12:30,815
Because you're authentic.
You are the real deal.
286
00:12:33,571 --> 00:12:35,583
I know I'm not supposed
to call him, but...
287
00:12:35,608 --> 00:12:37,975
I need to know if he's
thinking about me at all.
288
00:12:41,451 --> 00:12:43,484
Okay, he's picking up.
289
00:12:43,739 --> 00:12:45,305
He's checking caller I.D.
290
00:12:45,403 --> 00:12:46,436
And...
291
00:12:46,471 --> 00:12:47,737
he's putting it back down.
292
00:12:48,973 --> 00:12:52,041
- He sent me to voice mail.
- Because he's at work.
293
00:12:52,077 --> 00:12:54,441
They probably have a rule where
they can't take personal calls
294
00:12:54,466 --> 00:12:57,300
while they're having
coffee and-and-and laughing.
295
00:12:58,650 --> 00:13:00,003
Okay, well, then you call him.
296
00:13:00,028 --> 00:13:01,972
Well, technically, I think
that's a personal call...
297
00:13:01,997 --> 00:13:04,164
Call him.
298
00:13:06,837 --> 00:13:08,203
Okay.
299
00:13:08,489 --> 00:13:10,455
All right, he's picking it up...
300
00:13:10,480 --> 00:13:12,176
he's looking at it...
301
00:13:12,201 --> 00:13:14,335
and he's... Hey. Andy.
302
00:13:15,400 --> 00:13:17,333
Wh-What is up?
303
00:13:19,015 --> 00:13:20,648
That's a good question.
304
00:13:21,606 --> 00:13:24,167
Thanks for calling. I got to go.
305
00:13:24,542 --> 00:13:27,589
Oh, he picked up for
you. That says everything.
306
00:13:27,614 --> 00:13:30,323
But, Jill, you're on a
pause with Andy. I'm not.
307
00:13:30,348 --> 00:13:31,597
He probably picked up for me
308
00:13:31,622 --> 00:13:33,634
because he thought it was
something to do with Adam.
309
00:13:33,852 --> 00:13:35,451
It's him.
310
00:13:35,487 --> 00:13:36,986
Disguise your voice.
311
00:13:37,021 --> 00:13:38,755
It's Tammy. Calm down.
312
00:13:39,823 --> 00:13:41,224
Hi.
313
00:13:41,259 --> 00:13:43,806
Jill and I are following Andy around...
314
00:13:43,831 --> 00:13:46,596
I brought licorice.
Catch me up. Red or black?
315
00:13:46,631 --> 00:13:48,498
Red. I'm not a serial killer.
316
00:13:48,862 --> 00:13:50,600
Oh, God, please tell me
you didn't tell Marjorie
317
00:13:50,635 --> 00:13:52,979
- what we're doing.
- Mm-mm. She fell asleep on the couch.
318
00:13:53,004 --> 00:13:55,538
- She doesn't even know I'm here.
- Good, 'cause I am not up for
319
00:13:55,573 --> 00:13:57,234
- the "Don't Stalk Boyfriends" speech.
- Mm.
320
00:13:57,259 --> 00:13:59,609
Girls, part of being sober
321
00:13:59,644 --> 00:14:00,828
is not making choices
322
00:14:00,853 --> 00:14:02,984
you're gonna have to make
an amends for down the road.
323
00:14:03,297 --> 00:14:06,664
Keep your focus on
yourself and your sobriety.
324
00:14:06,689 --> 00:14:08,273
You know, it would be
nice if someone else
325
00:14:08,298 --> 00:14:10,555
cleaned the cat box once in a blue moon.
326
00:14:10,789 --> 00:14:13,923
It's not involved with sobriety;
it's just super annoying.
327
00:14:18,083 --> 00:14:19,449
Now, this is recovery.
328
00:14:19,474 --> 00:14:22,031
I'm following a cop instead
of them following me.
329
00:14:23,168 --> 00:14:24,644
Ooh, their woo-woo lights are on!
330
00:14:24,669 --> 00:14:26,202
Everybody down! We've been made!
331
00:14:26,227 --> 00:14:27,893
No, I think they spotted that drunk guy
332
00:14:27,918 --> 00:14:29,284
stumbling out of the bowling alley.
333
00:14:29,309 --> 00:14:31,730
Oh, no shirt on. Such a giveaway.
334
00:14:35,013 --> 00:14:37,148
What's up with those, Pavarotti?
335
00:14:37,348 --> 00:14:39,382
I swiped them from Marjorie.
336
00:14:39,417 --> 00:14:41,784
She uses them to keep an
eye out for the coyotes
337
00:14:41,809 --> 00:14:43,542
during the cats' playtime.
338
00:14:45,587 --> 00:14:47,515
Ooh, Joanna's strong.
339
00:14:47,540 --> 00:14:49,826
That's a solid half nelson.
340
00:14:49,861 --> 00:14:52,171
Andy very dainty with the cuffs.
341
00:14:52,196 --> 00:14:53,476
Yeah. Comes from a lifetime
342
00:14:53,501 --> 00:14:55,501
of being the biggest person in the room.
343
00:14:55,526 --> 00:14:58,193
He accidentally crushed
a bunny when he was six.
344
00:14:58,218 --> 00:15:00,051
Oh, my God. That's so sad.
345
00:15:00,076 --> 00:15:02,366
I know. I've been trying
to get him into therapy.
346
00:15:02,391 --> 00:15:04,758
Easter's a very
difficult holiday for him.
347
00:15:08,980 --> 00:15:11,247
Andy just opened
the back door for her!
348
00:15:11,282 --> 00:15:14,116
Yeah, he kind of had to. She's
got her hand full of drunk guy.
349
00:15:14,141 --> 00:15:16,057
Drunk-gonna-vomit
guy.
350
00:15:16,082 --> 00:15:17,882
Ooh! Ooh! Ooh!
351
00:15:18,836 --> 00:15:21,003
Joanna's caught a little
splash on her sleeve.
352
00:15:21,028 --> 00:15:22,928
And Andy is wiping it off for her.
353
00:15:22,953 --> 00:15:25,087
That is intimate behavior!
354
00:15:25,877 --> 00:15:27,471
I-I'm trying to think if Adam
355
00:15:27,496 --> 00:15:29,663
would wipe someone's
vomit off my sleeve.
356
00:15:29,688 --> 00:15:30,887
I guess he would.
357
00:15:30,912 --> 00:15:32,245
Of course he would.
358
00:15:32,270 --> 00:15:34,143
He's a gentleman.
359
00:15:40,385 --> 00:15:42,378
Aren't you glad we don't
drink like that anymore?
360
00:15:42,413 --> 00:15:43,846
And keep our shirts on?
361
00:15:43,882 --> 00:15:46,237
Yeah. We're so healthy now.
362
00:15:51,089 --> 00:15:53,289
Aw. Who bet they were
taking him to the hospital?
363
00:15:53,324 --> 00:15:54,406
I did.
364
00:15:54,431 --> 00:15:56,959
Damn it, I thought jail
was a stone-cold lock.
365
00:15:56,995 --> 00:15:58,661
Thank you, thank you.
366
00:15:58,696 --> 00:16:00,609
Oop. They're dragging him out.
367
00:16:00,634 --> 00:16:03,366
Marone, shirtless puker's out cold.
368
00:16:03,391 --> 00:16:04,824
And he lost a sneaker.
369
00:16:04,849 --> 00:16:06,849
Been there. You know,
people don't understand.
370
00:16:06,915 --> 00:16:09,782
Every time you see a lone
sneaker in the middle of a road,
371
00:16:10,267 --> 00:16:11,978
there's a story.
372
00:16:12,923 --> 00:16:15,344
Hey, when did Joanna have
time to put on lipstick?
373
00:16:15,369 --> 00:16:17,936
Oh, cut her some slack...
She's got puke on her sleeve.
374
00:16:18,228 --> 00:16:19,749
What are you guys doing?
375
00:16:19,784 --> 00:16:20,883
Get in. Close the door.
376
00:16:20,919 --> 00:16:22,318
We're spying on Jill's boyfriend.
377
00:16:24,220 --> 00:16:26,789
Dang it, I miss everything
since I took the night shift.
378
00:16:26,824 --> 00:16:28,069
Ooh. Licorice.
379
00:16:28,094 --> 00:16:29,444
Hey, what's going on with the drunk guy?
380
00:16:29,469 --> 00:16:30,738
Yeah, did he hit his head?
381
00:16:30,762 --> 00:16:32,139
No. We got to pump his stomach.
382
00:16:32,164 --> 00:16:33,863
Yeah! I win again. Pay up.
383
00:16:33,898 --> 00:16:35,765
And there's a warrant
out for his arrest,
384
00:16:35,800 --> 00:16:37,100
so he's going to jail after.
385
00:16:37,125 --> 00:16:39,092
Yes! Come to mama!
386
00:16:40,638 --> 00:16:43,239
Hey. See, now, right there,
why do they have to stand
387
00:16:43,264 --> 00:16:45,299
so close while they're going
over the little notepads?
388
00:16:45,324 --> 00:16:47,910
"He puked on you, yes he did, done."
389
00:16:47,946 --> 00:16:49,745
Hey, there's this guy in radiology,
390
00:16:49,781 --> 00:16:51,514
his name's Lorne, he
was in Desert Storm...
391
00:16:51,549 --> 00:16:53,861
Nobody cares about Desert Storm Lorne.
392
00:16:54,752 --> 00:16:55,952
Joanna does.
393
00:16:55,987 --> 00:16:57,920
They just moved in together.
394
00:16:58,822 --> 00:17:00,088
What?
395
00:17:00,264 --> 00:17:02,264
Yeah. They found this
cute little one-bedroom
396
00:17:02,289 --> 00:17:03,755
in a converted firehouse.
397
00:17:04,154 --> 00:17:06,762
You mean to tell me we've been
following them around all night
398
00:17:06,787 --> 00:17:08,177
and she's got a boyfriend?
399
00:17:08,202 --> 00:17:10,403
This firehouse, does
it still have the pole?
400
00:17:10,428 --> 00:17:13,622
Oh, I always wanted a
house with a fireman's pole.
401
00:17:14,138 --> 00:17:17,406
Oh, you guys, Andy's not cheating on me.
402
00:17:17,442 --> 00:17:18,941
He loves me.
403
00:17:18,966 --> 00:17:21,399
My sweet little bunny killer loves me.
404
00:17:23,881 --> 00:17:25,414
Step out of the car.
405
00:17:25,879 --> 00:17:27,312
No, uh...
406
00:17:27,337 --> 00:17:28,904
just Jill.
407
00:17:30,794 --> 00:17:32,627
How ya been?
408
00:17:35,760 --> 00:17:38,027
Wendy, don't you need
to get back inside?
409
00:17:38,272 --> 00:17:40,429
I'm the head nurse...
I can do whatever I want.
410
00:17:40,561 --> 00:17:42,398
Head nurse? Since when?
411
00:17:42,433 --> 00:17:44,467
Last year, right after I moved.
412
00:17:44,502 --> 00:17:47,203
- You moved?
- Do you guys listen to anything...
413
00:17:47,238 --> 00:17:49,944
Shh! It's getting heavy.
414
00:17:49,969 --> 00:17:51,502
I wish I could read lips.
415
00:17:51,527 --> 00:17:53,886
I can. I took a class
out by the airport.
416
00:17:53,911 --> 00:17:55,845
It's like a major university out there.
417
00:17:55,880 --> 00:17:57,346
You can study anything.
418
00:17:57,382 --> 00:17:59,115
We don't need to read lips, you guys.
419
00:17:59,140 --> 00:18:00,685
This is a full-on breakup.
420
00:18:00,710 --> 00:18:01,809
What makes you say that?
421
00:18:01,881 --> 00:18:04,420
He just handed her a
key and she's crying.
422
00:18:04,455 --> 00:18:05,821
Oop. Here she comes.
423
00:18:05,846 --> 00:18:08,113
Act like we don't know everything.
424
00:18:13,065 --> 00:18:14,898
- What happened?
- How'd it go?
425
00:18:14,923 --> 00:18:16,189
We're just sitting here.
426
00:18:18,202 --> 00:18:20,037
Well, the pause is over.
427
00:18:20,561 --> 00:18:22,505
Now we're on full stop.
428
00:18:22,530 --> 00:18:24,230
Oh, honey.
429
00:18:24,255 --> 00:18:27,928
I guess it's true, I am a bit too much.
430
00:18:27,953 --> 00:18:29,019
- No.
- No. - No.
431
00:18:29,044 --> 00:18:30,010
I am.
432
00:18:30,214 --> 00:18:33,315
But for the record, so are all of you.
433
00:18:36,891 --> 00:18:38,446
Go ahead and say it.
434
00:18:38,680 --> 00:18:40,626
I should've kept the focus on myself.
435
00:18:41,110 --> 00:18:44,172
Oh, honey, I'm not gonna
say anything like that.
436
00:18:44,368 --> 00:18:47,348
Breaks my heart to see you suffering.
437
00:18:47,383 --> 00:18:50,117
I will talk to the two of you later.
438
00:18:51,832 --> 00:18:53,398
I can't believe I blew it.
439
00:18:53,918 --> 00:18:55,623
This was the best relationship I've had
440
00:18:55,658 --> 00:18:56,871
since my marriage ended.
441
00:18:56,896 --> 00:18:59,396
Mm. I remember, and you said
442
00:18:59,421 --> 00:19:03,434
that you would never meet anyone
you cared about ever again.
443
00:19:04,100 --> 00:19:07,543
But you did. And it's gonna
happen next time too
444
00:19:10,872 --> 00:19:11,879
Hey.
445
00:19:11,904 --> 00:19:14,171
I didn't know I was walking
into the girls' dorm.
446
00:19:16,657 --> 00:19:18,600
Heh-heh-heh.
447
00:19:18,841 --> 00:19:20,460
Always three.
448
00:19:21,187 --> 00:19:22,725
What did Andy do now?
449
00:19:22,750 --> 00:19:24,884
If I tell you, you'd have to pay for it.
450
00:19:24,909 --> 00:19:26,375
I appreciate the heads-up.
451
00:19:26,624 --> 00:19:28,990
Now get out. Bad time to have a penis.
33329
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